October 7, 2025 • 52 mins
This week’s episode meets us at one of my most treasured places: the intersection of intuition and addiction.
In this conversation with one of my FAVORITE humans on this planet, psychic Bee Herz opens up on her personal recovery journey through rehab before transitioning to a powerful channeling session focused on discovering your life's purpose. She gets into themes of intuition, empathy, and how most addicts have intuition in spades.
Somewhere in the middle of the episode, she moves from answering my questions as a human into being a vessel and sharing her gift through delivering spiritual wisdom. It’s then that she dives into purpose - how it’s scalable, what that means, and she uses my work in the world as an example. We talk about one of my top favorite concepts and ways of being in the world—curiosity—and how sometimes we have to take the faith walk in life.
Most importantly, we discuss the belief that life can improve—even after addiction.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:29):
Before we begin, a quick note.
This podcast explores themessuch as mental health,
addiction, trauma, and recovery.
While the stories here arehonest and heartfelt, they're
not a substitute forprofessional advice, therapy, or
medical treatment.
Please listen with care andpause anytime you need to.
Take whatever resonates for youand leave the rest.
(00:49):
All right.
So today's episode is a littlebit different than our other
episodes for several reasons.
The first of which is that itwas impromptu.
I was on the phone with Bee thismorning to just catch up on some
things.
We were talking about when wewere going to record this.
And she went on a tangent aboutsomething that I was interested
in.
And I was like, Are you what areyou doing right now?
(01:10):
And so we hit record and justrecorded it over the phone.
Just however you do on aniPhone.
So that was the first thing thatwas interesting.
Bee is a psychic and an addict.
And it was such a beautiful andinteresting intersection of
those two things that Ipersonally have never met anyone
(01:31):
else that has both of thosethings.
I know it exists for sure.
Absolutely.
We actually talk about that atseveral different points.
But it starts with me asking herabout what that has been like
for her.
And it was a very sort of humanconversation.
And then something happens.
And what I love about this isthat I know when this happens
because I've talked to her sevenmillion times.
(01:53):
But what happens is somewhere inthe middle of the conversation,
she goes from just answering myquestions from her human
experience into channeling.
It is very subtle.
I notice it because I know hervery well.
I don't, I don't even know ifyou would notice when it
switches.
It is not some like dramatic,you know, the room is shaking,
(02:13):
the lights are blinking.
It's not like that at all.
It's very subtle, and I justhappen to know when it shifts,
and you'll hear my questionsshift with it as well.
And so I kind of changed the wayI'm asking questions once I
realize that she's actually in adifferent state.
The other thing that'sinteresting about this is so not
only did I not expect this tohappen, I had um nothing
planned.
(02:34):
And we end up talking about atone point when she's channeling,
she's specifically talking topeople who are in active
addiction, which I love so muchfor so many reasons.
Like we all, I think, need tohear words of hope and
inspiration on many differentlevels, but to get that sort of
(02:54):
directly from the other sidewhen you're in a place of
darkness or difficulty is areally beautiful gift.
And I it just I can't even, I'mnot even gonna say any more
about it because I think it'snot gonna do any justice to what
she gave this and what camethrough her, which is such an
incredible, incredible thing toexperience.
So the conversation starts alittle bit with controversy in
(03:16):
the crossroads between being apsychic and being an addict, and
we end up in in the realm ofhope.
Um, and so I'm just gonna letyou listen and I hope you enjoy
the ride.
SPEAKER_01 (03:36):
Okay.
Okay, so I go to rehab foralcohol addiction.
Let me preface what I'm sayingnow.
unknown (03:45):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (03:45):
And I am there and I am, I I I go in and I have, of
course, it's my first stunt atrehab, and I've never ever in my
life thought I would be re inrehab.
I'm almost a 60-year-old woman,and I'm in a rehab that I don't
have the resources for ahighfalutin, nice rehab.
(04:07):
You know, the ones with themassage and the massage and the
acupuncture and the bubblywaters.
And no, I am in a rehab whereeveryone there is, and I say
this with all respect and lovefor the people that get this
done because I don't know howyou get it done, and the artists
that do it, tattoos from head tohead to toe.
(04:28):
And I I have a new appreciationfor the art of tattoo.
And and not only that, but havebeen sent there for from prison,
jail, have spent time in prison,have anger issues, and are male
that it's co-ed as well, whichis sort of disturbing.
Uh, because I'm eitheraggressive and nothing like I've
(04:50):
been around this subset ofculture, and I'm an alcoholic
and they're all hard drug users.
Most of them are very difficulthard drug users.
So I'm there and everyone'ssaying, Oh, you know, all the
all the all the all the rehabcounselors are saying, Oh,
you're you go you're gonna findyou have everything in common.
(05:12):
And I'm looking around, going, Ihave nothing in common with
these people.
My roommate happens to be abutcher.
She is lovely.
And uh I got really lucky onthat score.
But however, all the other onesare in my face going, what do
you do for a living?
Like, uh I'm I'm feeling alittle sick right now.
(05:35):
I don't want to talk about itbecause you know, the first rule
of kind of rehab of is beinghonest and you're there to get
real and get through your shit,and so you can get the hell out
of there, ASAP.
And uh and finally I say, I'm apsychic.
And it goes around in the rehab,you know, that I'm a psychic.
And, you know, I can see thelooks of, yeah, sure you are, or
(05:59):
what's the fuck is this allabout?
Pardon my French, but you know,it's interesting.
Uh, so I'm not only old and odd,now I'm weird old and odd.
And uh weird, old, and odd.
And so, but as time goes on,what I really did realize is
that I am an addict.
(06:21):
I am an addict.
It doesn't matter your age, yourcircumstances, your walk.
We all have the same behaviors,we all have the same life uh
foibles and and journey.
It might look different, butit's in essence the same walk as
being human is sort of the samewalk.
But addicts have a particular,you know, lane they choose to go
(06:44):
down.
The road uh I would say lesstraveled, but unfortunately this
day it's probably the road mosttraveled, uh which is sad.
And I also find out when I getto know these people how
intuitive they are.
And sitting in a room of a bunchof intuitive empaths, which I
(07:06):
have not done before.
And I've always been the odd onenow, feeling things, knowing
things, sensing things, but in aroom of of people that have
substance abuse issues, I what Ihave found are some kind of over
the years, uh just watchingpeople and knowing people, is
(07:28):
that there are we're veryintuitive, we're very empathic,
we're very, because we're insurvival mode, which are all the
things intuition comes fromsurvival.
Everybody's like, oh, you havethe gooseies, your hair raises
on your arm, and something'sabout to happen, or you know
something.
Well, that's you know, when wewere at Crow Magnum, whether you
(07:49):
believe in in that theory ornot, our bodies are hardwired to
know when danger is present.
And that is the very foundationof intuition, knowing before we
see, so we can survive.
So, in essence, that theme rightthere starts when we're born.
We cry when something is wrong,you know, and I sometimes still,
(08:12):
when we're 60, cry whensomething is wrong.
You know, when we know somethingis upsetting and wrong and we
don't have words for it, what isthat?
Intuition, feeling, knowing.
And addicts have it in spadesbecause we run around in
survival mode.
We run around trying to hide ourfeelings or suppress it.
And unfortunately, a lot oftimes what psychedelics do, and
(08:35):
this has been known since the60s there ago, the invention of
uh or the the procreation andinvention of LSD and
psychedelics was to enhance yourfeelings.
And then we get to the thegeneration of uh, you know,
raves and you know that thatdrug, you know, the the I can't
(08:55):
think of the name of it, but thedrug that makes you feel more.
It was invented to make you feelfor relationships, to make you
feel more sexually, to make youfeel more in touch, in tune, uh,
is is really making people thenthat are feelers feel more.
It's just fascinating to me thatthis whole world of addicts and
(09:19):
this whole world of addiction isfilled with people that are in
past psychics and probablyhealers.
Yeah.
And I yeah, and are trying toget rid of it.
Yes.
Instead of, you know, going downa path of getting paid for it,
like I did, you know, it back inthe day, or using it like I
(09:43):
teach students to or otherpeople to do in their everyday
life to enhance your life and toactually know that you're
special and and not in a kind ofa defunct way as addicts feel.
Oh, yeah, yeah, you're special.
You have this disease, and we'retotal these kind of things to
have us put this kind of crookedcrown on to say, yeah, we're
special, and uh and we're alltogether and we're grouped
(10:04):
together, but we really are haveenhanced abilities.
And I don't know what theresearch would show, but I would
cut dozens to donuts that itwould show that addicts have a
much higher rate of psychicintuition, mediumship, healing
aptitude.
Definitely empathic aptitude.
SPEAKER_00 (10:23):
Yeah, I believe that.
Um, so what has been like thatwas in rehab.
So what happened when everyonefound out you were psychic?
SPEAKER_01 (10:34):
Well, the first time I was in rehab, everyone knew.
Okay.
And so people would take me tothe side and say, even the most
hardened of, I would say,criminals in that environment.
Um, so to me, that was hardened.
I don't know what anybody else,you know, like their rock is.
But you know, they had intoprison, they had sold drugs,
they had done drugs, and andthis is my first encounter with
(10:57):
with that kind of um with thatkind of situation.
Uh they are very uh intuitiveand kind and would take me to
the side and say, hey, you know,this happened to me, or this, I
had this dream, or what do youthink about?
I saw my grandmother's ghost,whatever.
Uh everybody has had anexperience.
I would say almost everyone hashad an intuitive experience of
(11:21):
some sort, a knowing somebody.
Oh, to the to the smallest, tothe largest.
Oh, I know I was just thinkingof you and you called to uh
which I put in the minorcategory, um, to uh the large
ones of oh my gosh, I sawsomething, maybe something
tragic.
I saw a world event and ithappened, or I saw someone, I
felt somebody was dead dying,and then I got a call.
(11:43):
They were, they, they had theyhad passed, or to um, I see
things.
Um, and you really are seeingthings.
You're you're not uh your mindis not altered on any kind of
substance or anything else inlife.
You see, you wake up and you seea ghost, or you hear things, or
you know things.
Um, these events happened toeveryone, and they were
(12:05):
happening to people that I hadmet in rehab more than the
everyone was taking me to theside and asking uh about it, and
more so uh in that culture andthat in the in in that
environment than I have anywhereelse.
I mean, I've been to dinnerparties, I have friends, I have
this, and people know what I do.
(12:26):
And a lot of people aren't thatcurious.
I would say addiction andaddicts by nature, if you're
looking at your addiction, youryour working steps, or you're
trying to do something else,Buddhism.
There's a lot of different pathsfor recovery, you're looking at
your own behavior, thereforeyou're sifting through your life
and things that are not easilyuh processed or explainable, or
(12:51):
if you are in therapy or are inrehab and you're saying, you
know, this thing keeps happeningto me.
And I'm I don't know why.
How explain this one, you know,guru or therapist, or you know,
and and you don't have someonethat can hear that, then it's
like something else that makesyou different than or strange
than and makes you feel off andweird and adds to the reason
(13:13):
that you might want to use asubstance instead of someone
that says, Oh my gosh, I havethat every day.
To get in line, get in linebetween five other, ten other
people in this room, right?
To find out that this issomething that is really
occurring quite frequently.
And so after so in rehab, thatwas really interesting.
And then when I got out of rehaband started going, you know,
(13:36):
into the into the rooms, as theysay, of addiction, um, and and
working in in 12-step programs,I really realized that most
people have this and are veryempathic and very sensitive and
really tuned in.
And some people are reallycurious and some people aren't.
(13:57):
Uh, I really don't announce, Idon't proselytize in meetings
what I do.
Yeah, I'm I'm be psychic mediumand addict.
You know, that doesn't come out.
I'm being addict, I you know,uh, but it gets around.
I and especially because I livein a small town, and people will
(14:19):
reach out, they are curiousbecause you're you're you're
wounded and you're trying topush down your feelings and your
senses instead of being rewardedfor having those really
intelligent, insightful gifts,you're trying to get rid of them
and trying to heal from feeling,which is not really the path.
(14:41):
The path is feel, heal, process,relate, and live a good life.
But who is addressing theotherworldly that happens, the
spiritual?
We have higher power, but do wehave someone that says, yeah,
you you're you're you're seeingghosts?
(15:03):
Okay, perfectly normal.
Yeah.
I mean, who does that on anyregular basis?
SPEAKER_00 (15:09):
Well, and so curious, like if you after I had
been I was like maybe threemonths sober, and I the first
thing that happened that Inoticed um was my ears started
ringing.
And they started it was all thetime.
And I thought something waswrong with me, and then I
thought I was fucking crazy.
Um and like then at one point intime you and I talked about that
(15:31):
and like what like I always wantto know what everything means
because I'm me and I overthinkeverything.
Um but and since then many otherthings have happened, and I
remember talking to you aboutbeing you were like you said you
said that one point that I was apsychic and I was like, I am not
a psychic.
And I because I'm not a psychicthe way that you're a psychic,
(15:53):
right?
Right.
And understanding that this theway this unfolds or develops or
changes or what it means for oneperson may be very different
than what it means for someoneelse.
SPEAKER_01 (16:04):
Correct.
And and that is true.
And the earring, just ifanybody, anyone has it, it
happens to people.
First of all, it is a realdisorder.
That's an it is think they callit.
So if you are having it, youknow, of course, you know, uh uh
uh in my profession, as in themedical profession, I I practice
do no harm.
So get it checked out.
(16:25):
If it comes and goes, it's alsoa pressure thing.
You know, I I am, if anythingelse, the least woo-woo person
of woo-woo people.
I have to make sure thateverything is not human,
medically, otherwise electronicbefore I can say this is what
this means.
But uh it happened to me aswell.
(16:47):
And it's really uh interestingbecause it's aboriginal and in
in nature that when your earsring, that's where it came from,
it means you're getting adownload of information from an
outside source.
And your it bypasses your aka uhthinking brain, if you will.
(17:08):
So you're getting information,and it doesn't surprise me at
all that it happens to peoplewhen they get clean or sober,
get off drugs, get offsubstances, because your brain
isn't available to processcertain things because it's in
an altered state.
So all of a sudden, you know,all this information is kind of
like a like a ticker tape aboveyou, ready to, you know, you
(17:30):
you're able and willing toprocess it now.
So it drops in.
So the earringing is is reallyinteresting.
And I would be interested tosay, you know, like people that
are listening to to this to thisdiscussion, how many of you have
had are addicts and how many ofyou have experienced things
after you've gotten clean orsober?
You know, like what does thatlook like for you?
(17:52):
Because it should become uh moreintense.
And how do you deal with thatwhen you can't use a substance
to push down the thoughts andthe feelings and the outside
information that makes you feellike you're going crazy on some
level?
Um, the degree of how how thatthat affects you.
(18:15):
And to to really, I would loveto have a 12-step uh intuitive,
yeah, intuitive, a 12-stepsurrender step one.
You are powerless over yourintuitive and and ghosts.
I don't know, you know, somekind of fun way to address this
(18:39):
or you know, it to to say, youknow, it's okay.
You know, it yeah, you'redifferent, you're you're you're
strange and in and whatever.
We all are in some degree, butyeah, it's all right.
It's okay.
And you can do with it whateveryou want to do with it.
You don't have to, you know, doit for a living.
You can take it into youreveryday life and it just
(19:00):
enhances and it just allows youto accept a piece of yourself.
All of this walk is aboutaccepting pieces of ourselves
and not pushing them away.
SPEAKER_00 (19:10):
Yeah.
So and that was one of thethings I didn't I realized that
afterwards that I could feel somuch.
And I didn't know that part ofwhy I was numbing out so much is
I didn't want to feel people.
Um, but I didn't have languagefor that.
SPEAKER_01 (19:24):
Well, there is no language.
There is no language for the, ifyou will, supernatural world.
Yeah, uh, I struggle with it allthe time.
I'm like, pardon my lack of ofwords.
And this sound, it might soundtrite.
It might sound, I mean, like Ihate the word ghost.
I hate the word psychic.
I mean, I would love to be, Iwould love for language to
(19:47):
develop in my field or in thatarena.
And the fact that it hasn't justgoes to prove that people don't
spend a lot of time there, or itwould.
We would have slang, we don'thave slang.
SPEAKER_00 (19:59):
We don't have a lot of words for anything in my
realm.
Why do you think people don'task you that much?
It's one of the things thatbought like baffles me because
I'm so curious all the timeabout your experience.
Why do you think no one everasks you?
SPEAKER_01 (20:14):
Uh well, I would have to guess.
Uh I think well, I I know, youknow, people have told these
some things, but over the years,obviously.
But I think that part of it isbecause they're embarrassed that
they're having this reaction, orI'm going to tell you I have no
idea, which is going to scareyou even more that something is
(20:38):
wrong.
A lot of times this is put inthe mental of disorders
category.
And so it, you know, and a lotof people that um have addiction
have a dual diagnosis.
We have a lot of stuff going on.
So if you say, you know, I'mhearing voices and I'm gonna
say, sorry, uh, you need to goget that checked out.
That doesn't, I'm not a doctor.
(21:00):
I'm not telling you there'ssomething wrong with you.
I'm just saying in my and and Ido explain this.
I I just don't let that lie.
As you know, I'm a I'm a heavyperson on explaining the human
experience along with thepsychic phenomenon.
And I think it's so importantbecause you will scare people if
you're in my profession and youjust say, yeah, you're hearing
voices too.
No, that's not really happeningto you.
(21:21):
Go to a doctor.
That is so, so um just ininhumane to do to somebody as
well.
I think people are afraid.
That's why they don't come.
I think that they're afraid tohear or see.
And what if I say, yeah, yeah,you are seeing ghosts?
Well, that's kind of scary too.
What do I do about that?
Well, there are, you know, I dohave tools after 25 years of
(21:43):
practicing this.
You know, I do have things youcan do.
Um, when you go to somebody thathas been doing this for a long
period of time, then you do, Imight not have great words, but
I do have some advice on how tohow to deal with things.
And I think that there's fear, Ithink that there's the unknown,
I think that people think, oh,she doesn't want to be bothered
(22:05):
with it.
Uh, I don't I think that I thinkthere are a plethora of reasons,
but um I find it refreshing whensomebody wants to know what why
I do what I do.
And as you know, because youasked a gazillion questions, uh,
which I love, but a lot of timesit's like, I have no idea.
(22:25):
I have no idea why I receive thethings I receive.
I have no, you know, and andthat's another another
interesting phenomenon that thishappens to people, but no one is
willing to do the research inthat, in that, in, in this area,
in this arena.
SPEAKER_00 (22:41):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (22:42):
And it's such a big part of people's lives, and it's
still kind of in the dark ages.
SPEAKER_00 (22:46):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (22:47):
You know, discovery of witches, if you will.
SPEAKER_00 (22:49):
Yeah.
Yes.
So how many times were you inrehab?
SPEAKER_01 (22:54):
Oh, let's see.
One, two and a half.
Meaning I was did two 30-daystents and one of like a long
weekend for uh what you knowwhat I'm seeing I'm I'm I'm not
remembering what it's callednow.
When you're when you're tryingto get off of, you know, when
(23:15):
they medically take you off of asubstance.
Detox?
Detox.
Thank you.
SPEAKER_00 (23:20):
Yes.
There it is.
Um, what do you think at whatpoint what changed or what made
it work?
Like where did you shift fromgoing backwards to like changed
into moving forward?
SPEAKER_01 (23:34):
Well, isn't that the magic question?
Yeah, right.
Um, you know, and when I cameinto the when I started going to
meetings and stuff, uh, I hearda lot of people say, you're a
miracle, you're that you'resitting here.
And statistically, okay, and I'mnot big on math.
Uh, yes, probably.
Um, however, I think everyonegets to their, it's very simple,
(23:58):
and simple things are reallydifficult.
Simple constructs.
Yes, there is a God.
You know, simple ideas arereally just believe, are very
difficult to wrap our headsaround.
We want a lot, our we want ourbrains want a lot of information
to to make a story.
So when people say you'resitting here, you're a miracle,
I'm always why.
(24:20):
Okay, statistically, okay, fine,check.
But really, why?
Why did I get it and so manyother people have not?
I think part of that is I thinkdifferent, there's recipes for
everyone.
First of all, the pain of ofsuffering becomes larger than
the pain of not suffering.
(24:44):
And that's just human.
So we make a decision not to bein pain.
And then I think from thedecision not to be in pain is is
my life enhanced by not using asubstance.
And that's where I think a lotof people fail on this step.
Because yes, we're miserable.
Yes, our lives are torn apart.
Yes, you know, for me, all ofthat was true.
(25:07):
But I have nowhere to go fromfrom this from this space except
somewhere.
I yeah, I don't know what thatlooks like in a different type
of life.
I can't go back to the one I hadbefore because I trashed it.
I can't, I don't know what theone forward looks like.
So there's a lot of fear.
I think stubbornness.
And as addicts, we are soperfectionist, controlling,
(25:31):
stubborn creatures.
And that's why a lot of us don'tmake it because we use that to
our own detriment.
But if we can use that and startusing it in small ways when we
first get into recovery topropel us just to take the next
right step, as they say.
Now I'm going to start using,you know, the the the slogans
(25:53):
and the sayings that I I reallydislike but are so apt.
That you know, they've beenaround because they they're
true, they're truisms.
That when you do the next beststubborn, right, perfectionist
thing, but it's in your behalf,it's it it's it's to suit serve
you and more importantly, othersthat gives us something called
(26:15):
purpose.
Uh then we start a differenttrajectory and our brains start
to heal, our bodies start toheal, and we we get better.
Now, with that being said, abunch of pain can come can come
in on any, you know, triggers,as they say, or somebody does
something crappy, you lose yourjob, you know, whatever it may
(26:36):
be.
SPEAKER_00 (26:36):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (26:37):
Um, there's a lot going on in our world right now
that we want to tune out.
I mean, people just can't comehome and turn on the TV and
blissfully slip away.
And in my era of the wonderfulworld or Disney or, you know,
all in the family, or you know,whatever it might be, NCIS, what
it is these days, or uh, youknow, Netflix.
Yes, you can, but in betweenthat, you're hearing noise all
(27:00):
the time.
You're hearing all the stuffthat's going on in the world.
And if you're sensitive, itadds, it's just another layer of
the crap Sunday that is stressin our lives.
And we, it just it's difficult,it's difficult to escape.
So the knowing comes in andsays, okay, you're you're you're
(27:22):
having a moment, you're havingsome reactions, you're having
this and that.
But on top of that, you're alsoa really sensitive person.
And I hate that word sensitiveperson.
You're very empathic person.
So, okay, how do you, you know,just the general acceptance that
that's who you are, another partof you can help relieve that and
(27:43):
also help with not wanting topick up and drown out all the
all the noise we have in ourlives.
SPEAKER_00 (27:49):
So I have a question.
You have you talked aboutpurpose for a minute.
Um and people, I'm curiousbecause sometimes people will
refer to like their addiction orthat time when they were, you
know, however many years it was,as like they failed or it was a
problem, or you know, theysomehow fucked things up for
lack of better words.
Um But is it part of the plan?
(28:10):
Like, is it did they really gothat far from from off rails or
was it helpful?
SPEAKER_01 (28:19):
I believe that every experience we have, and this is
just my personal belief, ishelpful.
Now it might not be pleasant,but it's a you know, and as as
you know, many people in in inthe new age or guruy or the
psychic, whatever field say it'sa lesson.
Um and that is the best word Ithink that we can use.
(28:41):
I'm just tired of it.
But I I think that we have thesethese things that uh to survive
here in human form, becausethat's who we are on this level
and at this time is human.
And the human experience isdense and it's difficult, but it
can also be when we embrace itand we get healthy, really a
(29:02):
sensual, and I mean sensual inall those words, you know, uh
sensual smells, and this humanbody can do some really fun
things and really see things andinvent things, and our brains
can can go to places and travelplaces that that uh you know, we
we're really inter humans arereally interesting.
(29:24):
And so purpose gives us uh areason for being in our bodies
at this time on this planet.
Why are we here?
There can be I wouldn't say athousand reasons, but there can
be a good ten reasons.
You're a mother, you your job,your you what drives you, what
(29:48):
what heals you, what and thatchanges over our lifetime as we
age as well.
Being a child, just survivingchildhood, just surviving every
day.
That's purpose and a number.
itself but when we get to apoint as um maslott's hierarchy
which which is sort of like youknow our our base uh when we
(30:08):
have our base functions met andwe start to evolve even as
addicts we start to evolve upthat hierarchy and we have our
needs met life starts gettingbetter da da da then purpose
takes on a different meaningwhat do I want to do to help me
enjoy this human experience andsometimes people call that the
(30:30):
pink cloud and what recoverydoes in this about bring
recovery into this is reallyspecial in this one aspect is
that it says give back to otherswhat you have been so freely
given that is biblicallybiblical biblical importance
(30:58):
because unless you are truly inyour and you you truly have
you're truly truly strugglingand that might be with other
issues even as sick or asunhealthy as we are if we can do
(31:19):
one thing for another personjust to listen and if that's
even somebody helping us at thetime but to say how was your day
if we can look at that as a formof getting out of ourselves we
can start to feel better.
It is the one tried and truething that helps our addicts and
humans into purpose then westart to want to do it because
(31:44):
it makes us feel good.
It's not that we made the otherperson feel good it's that it
made us feel something goodabout ourselves.
And that is why purpose is soimportant is because it gives us
it gives us a framework and away to move through the human
experience and when bad lessonsnot bad or difficult things come
(32:07):
in we can run it up the flagpoleof purpose and see where it
lands okay did I need to knowthis did I have to go through
this why did I go through thisof course there's a reason
there's always a reason but dowe give a reason a reason
meaning how do we explain thisexperience to ourselves do we
(32:32):
make uh addiction into somethingthat's purposeful and meaningful
and how do we do that do we haveto you know do the big things
you know start nonprofits starta podcast right like do we have
to do the things or can we dothe little things and I would
(32:54):
say yes to all of the above andthat's what purpose is purpose
is all I always know when I hitpurpose with people and it's
scalable.
It can be the littlest of thingsand it can be the largest of
things that you do with yourlife.
SPEAKER_00 (33:06):
Can you give me an example of someone's purpose
that's scalable like where theymight stop here or where they
might keep going can I use youas an example?
SPEAKER_01 (33:15):
Sure go for it.
Okay okay so when you first whenwe first met you came to me and
um we were talking about yourpotential in in the into it
intuitive field and and I getall excited and and I'm like
yeah you can be a psychic lookat this look at this and you're
(33:36):
looking at me like yeah crazylady um that's exactly what I
said when I was five I want togrow up and be a psychic because
you know and I forget I didn'tdo that either I would have been
horrified you know no I'm goingyou know like I don't even want
to you know grow up to even seewhat that looks like.
And so we didn't speak for quitea period of time um after that
(34:00):
we mean we talked and stuff butwe didn't like engage in that
and in and it's always reallysad to me people ask me what
their purpose is and I get thisbeautiful picture of a lie and
and it scares people or it's notwhat you think it is.
And so that's a lot of times whypeople don't ask me questions
for the very reason that thatinteraction between us.
(34:22):
But then it kept niggling atyou.
And so you came back and youknow and years later of our
friendship and and and workingtogether we went through a
process and you were curious.
Curiosity is in resilience.
So you kept asking questions andhearing the answers and and
(34:42):
saying okay maybe I can utilizethis in other ways in my life I
don't have to be a psychic.
No you don't that's not reallywhat I said by the way but uh if
I go back in time which you knowI don't I you know you I
probably said you can use thisin other ways but if you're just
looking at me you're thinkingI'm I'm I'm describing I I I'm
wanting you to join the cult.
(35:03):
No, I don't I just want you tobe good with your intuition and
if you have really greatintuition my gosh let's do
something with this and sobecause it's gonna keep keep on
and and it gets it's you know soI think what's fascinating is
you you said no and then itbothered you or niggled you I
don't know exactly what it did.
(35:23):
And you were curious I thinkmore than anything and you came
back.
You could have stopped and goneabout your life and it and been
fine right but then when westarted working together and you
started saying yes to learningmore about this this side of
your life and what that did wasopen up a whole different
(35:46):
reality for you that you couldexperience life differently than
you had before you realized youhad this amazing intuition and
this amazing gift to A helpothers and B utilize your
intuition and your empathy andall the all those goodies along
(36:07):
with what what we looked at aspurpose and for you you wanted
to give back and how how we howwe together work together to
kind of get you on a path tocraft that you could have
stopped any step of the way youcould have said okay I just want
to be a sponsor okay inaddiction okay I you know I just
(36:31):
I want to go back to school andbe a therapist uh there are many
things you could have stoppedalong the way and what's
interesting is what I alwayskind of saw for you is a very
large life and here I hate wordsum large meaning large potential
(36:51):
you could you could dramaticallychange addiction in in any way
you want in a way that youwanted to with love and
compassion and and and wisdomand smarts and and how that came
about was through how can we howcan you do that best and a lot
of this is working with theintuitive side and in the
(37:14):
information that's given butalso the um the human what can
we do okay we get theinformation now how can we apply
this to you as a human and youknow maybe that's working in
addiction um which you've doneall of this but you didn't stop
you you're like okay well I wantmore I want more and and I think
(37:38):
because you're meant to do morenow we're speaking about you
other people will if would stopright where you are right now
and that's with podcasts that'swith helping people in addiction
that's with you can keep uh yourJ O B your job as I like to call
it which enhances your life andallows you to do these other
(38:00):
things aka for free withoutmaking money but do you want to
step in the world of servicewhere you you make money as
something you love to do andthat's really what we all want
to do.
And that's where you are you'regoing to do you know you're
podcasting books um your ownyour own business with addiction
(38:21):
your own nonprofit you knowthese are things that create a
platform for you and and purposenow if you had stopped with I
just want to be a sponsor doeslarge or small make a difference
to the to you you have had freewill and a choice every step of
(38:41):
this journey when something getstoo scary you could have stopped
for a year and said no I don'twant to do anymore I want to
stay right here or you couldhave stopped right where you
were you know five years ago andsaid this is what I want this is
all I want I just want to befree from addiction and that is
admirable and that is purposethen we find purpose in other
(39:03):
ways in your life and and itwould have been glorious and
wonderful there's no right orwrong here it just is do you
want to keep growing um and ingrowth I don't mean as a good
thing it just is a thing you sayyes to how much do you want to
(39:24):
how how much of a part ofpurpose do you want to be a part
of do you want it to be you knowan eighth of the pie a quarter
of the pie or the pie do youwant to live purpose if you want
to live purpose people that livepurpose are I will say usually
doctors you know like it's ahigh energy you're all in you
(39:46):
live your life all for purposeand that's that's a big that's a
big ask it's like a it's allit's what you do.
That's not to say that you don'thave other things that give you
joy because you do you justlearn and being in addiction you
learn to have balance where alot of people that live their
(40:08):
purpose kind of have to gothrough these hard difficult
lessons and um so purpose isscalable.
So you could have stopped anystep of the way and you can
still stop you can stop at anytime and say I want to retire.
And does that mean that you'reany less successful as a human
(40:30):
in this lifetime with purposeand what you've done absolutely
not it's just what you arecomfortable with in your
timeline.
But you my friend are such aninteresting human that you say I
keep saying yes I want more Iwant more I want more and in a
really beautiful way that you'resaying yes to purpose itself and
(40:54):
whatever that brings you withoutreally knowing what that's going
to end up looking like.
And it just keeps growing fromthat place.
And that's called faith.
The faith walk so that was areally long-winded answer.
SPEAKER_00 (41:10):
That was really beautiful though and I like
where you landed on the faithwalk because I think people ask
that question is this enough?
Should I keep going?
What does it look like?
Right.
And when they stand at acrossroads how to make that
choice and how to lean intowhat's right for them.
Do you have any thoughts on howhow they can get in touch with
what is the best choice for themif they should go left or right
(41:33):
or how to lean in more topurpose if they don't know.
SPEAKER_01 (41:37):
Yes I I think if you're fine where you are and
you're like I this I'm reallyhappy if you look around at your
life and you're I mean not thatwe have to be oh my gosh my life
is grand but if you're happy andcontent I say content things are
going well fine stay there.
But however you know as we growand we walk this walk things
(42:01):
happen.
And if something shifts orchanges in your life and you
want to to do more to be more togive more or to do less but when
you do less you find you have ahole in your life and you don't
know how to fill it that couldbe retirement that could be a
death that could be a change ofa divorce that could be a job
(42:23):
change that could be I mean manythings many life things happen
to us then that is a wonderfulplace to start looking at where
am I really happy?
Is there something I've alwayswanted to do and I think the
word that at that juncture getcurious and there's a lot of
(42:46):
fear with curiosity rightbecause we don't understand it's
like we're taught as kids ohdon't be too curious you know
don't because we're at we'reborn curious.
We're born curiosity orsomething it did but it really
doesn't you know that thatsaying I really dislike I'll
have a pride in truisms I wouldsay yeah for the baby walking
(43:09):
around on the floor yes butthere's an adult that's supposed
to be there that tempers thatcuriosity.
When you're an adult or whenyou're even not an adult I would
say when your brain is still youknow in your teenage years and
and and upwards be curious inhealthy ways.
You know go go if you're curiousabout I don't know I was really
(43:32):
really weirdly curious kid itprobably doesn't surprise but
like I I thought I wanted to bea mortician for a time because
it wasn't the mortician it wasthe fascination with what
happens when we die because I'mon the looking back at it none
all of this makes sense becauseof what I ended up doing with my
purpose.
Yeah but I just said okay that'sreally weird but I fortunately
(43:55):
had a really weird friend whowanted to write him a movie on
death.
So he went with me and so hedidn't think it was weird at all
the weirder the better.
So you know surround yourselfwith people that are curious and
and in your tribe as well thatare curious about weird things
or or you know it might not beweird things it might be
everyday things.
You know you're curious aboutfirefighting you're curious
(44:18):
about whatever it might be andto me that's an everyday thing
because in my world that's justan everyday thing.
You're curious about aliens Idon't know go figure it out be
the one that gets to be theexpert on why we don't know what
we know or why we do know youknow take that curiosity and
(44:39):
lean into it and that's reallyat any point in your life I
don't care if you're listeningto this and you're 80 at any
point in your life curiositylean in and try and conquer the
fear I know that's really reallydifficult but if you can if you
(45:00):
do first and then think aboutthe fear later and take somebody
crazy with you that that isn'tafraid or is as afraid as you
but you're doing it together youknow that that is that is that
is a great next step coming fullcircle that's a great next step
and that will always lead youtowards health wealth purpose
(45:24):
and a long loving life so whatwould you tell someone who feels
like they don't feel supportedor they're met with a bunch of
negativity or people that don'tbelieve that or don't cheer them
on or shut them down that'ssimple and remember I at near
the beginning of thisconversation I said simple
(45:46):
simple is difficult.
Simple is one of the mostdifficult things we can do get
yourself out of the situationand that is sometimes the most
difficult thing we can do andespecially if we're looking at
addiction get yourself out ofthings people places and things
(46:07):
that are not supportive of yourwell being and if you're an
active addiction right now andlistening to this then your
brain is going hey bitch I'mfeeling pretty good right now.
I just heard part of that andI'm feeling really good because
I'm gonna go find my purposetomorrow I'm going to go do this
(46:28):
tomorrow.
And but between now and then I Ihave something to look forward
to so I'm gonna use you know themillion reasons we use or you're
crazy I have nothing left and Iwant to sit here and use is that
really you know the next bestthing for you are you curious
about where you are right now Iwould say an addiction I don't
(46:52):
think you're curious ever Ithink you're trying to numb and
not be curious.
You're not trying to lean inyou're trying to lean out and so
if you're trying to lean out getout and I say that and it was
(47:13):
very one of the hardest thehardest the most difficult thing
I've had to do in 61 years of mylife was the most difficult path
that I walked was getting cleansober whatever you want to call
that move move your body even ifit's just into the next room
(47:35):
just get up and do somethingthat is healthy for you first if
you can if you can't keep tryingbecause there's no reason I
should be here today absolutelyzero reason that I am and I'm
(47:56):
glad I am yeah for the most partthere are days I'm not but we
all have those but I think oncewe get past addiction allows us
to have it's a gift in therespect that it allows us to
have perspective into ourselveswhich most people are are never
given and and it's it's neverwant to look at it allows that
(48:19):
and it also allows us to behealthier versions and people
that we can't even imagine andhave thoughts and ideas and
friends and go places that wewould have never experienced
before.
And what is that if that is notjoyful purpose exciting
adventure it's living and that'swhat if you're in addiction and
(48:46):
you want to get out of addictionthat's what you have to look
forward to a purpose and a lifeof living and loving yourself
first and then others that wasreally beautiful my last
question too is for anyone who'slistening what do they need to
know the most it gets bettereverything gets better it might
(49:17):
get worse before it gets betterit might flatten out for 10
years you might be walking inthe desert that there will it
will get better I promise itgets better it gets worse it
gets better it gets worse andthat's how we grow anyone that's
listening to this if you canhave a little bit of faith in
(49:43):
something something that is aglimmer of hope that oh my gosh
I'm still alive today I have noreason to be still alive today
but I'm still alive today whatdo I want to do with this day
like can I do something a littlebit different just know it gets
(50:04):
better if you can find a reasonto get up off the floor I love
that I love you I love you tooyou but you got me teary there
at the end because it's becauseinside it gets better it lives
(50:27):
hope yes it does hope faiththese words that we we we throw
away throw around yeah they'rereally meant to be lived you
have to live faith you have tolive hope you have to live into
it and it's not always they'regreat words grace we have to
(50:52):
live grace we have to live lovewe have to live hope and to do
that we have to live to justknow it gets better you're
you're here if you're hereyou're meant to be here and in
my world if you're hearing meand you're not here sorry yeah
(51:14):
but you know there's stillthings to do you don't get you
know death isn't the end all beall you don't get to die and
just you don't feel anythingpeople there's lessons in heaven
believe it or not and I hatethat word heaven but I don't
know what else to call it thereyou still keep growing you still
keep learning we are we areenergy of of life it it we we
(51:36):
never stop being so hang inthere it gets better thank you
you're very welcome it was apleasure thank you so much I
appreciate it more than you knowI hope I know they do too well I
thank you for the work thatyou're doing and bringing
different viewpoints andthoughts and and discussions and
(52:00):
and curious conversations intothis arena it's important I
guess thank you where purposetakes me yes we will young lady
but your psychic knows unlessyou choose to say no so far that
hasn't been the case so no thathas not and you've gone fast and
furious up the ladder yes youhave thank you so much for being
(52:27):
here it means more than you knowif you enjoyed this episode
please share it with a friend orleave a quick rating or review
wherever you listen to podcasts.
SPEAKER_00 (52:34):
It helps more people find the show.
If you want more of me head onover to NataniAlison.com and
enter your name and email forbehind the scenes updates in
between shows.
New episodes air every Tuesdaywe'll see you next week
Before we begin, a quick note.
This podcast explores themessuch as mental health,
addiction, trauma, and recovery.
While the stories here arehonest and heartfelt, they're
not a substitute forprofessional advice, therapy, or
medical treatment.
Please listen with care andpause anytime you need to.
Take whatever resonates for youand leave the rest.
(00:49):
All right.
So today's episode is a littlebit different than our other
episodes for several reasons.
The first of which is that itwas impromptu.
I was on the phone with Bee thismorning to just catch up on some
things.
We were talking about when wewere going to record this.
And she went on a tangent aboutsomething that I was interested
in.
And I was like, Are you what areyou doing right now?
(01:10):
And so we hit record and justrecorded it over the phone.
Just however you do on aniPhone.
So that was the first thing thatwas interesting.
Bee is a psychic and an addict.
And it was such a beautiful andinteresting intersection of
those two things that Ipersonally have never met anyone
(01:31):
else that has both of thosethings.
I know it exists for sure.
Absolutely.
We actually talk about that atseveral different points.
But it starts with me asking herabout what that has been like
for her.
And it was a very sort of humanconversation.
And then something happens.
And what I love about this isthat I know when this happens
because I've talked to her sevenmillion times.
(01:53):
But what happens is somewhere inthe middle of the conversation,
she goes from just answering myquestions from her human
experience into channeling.
It is very subtle.
I notice it because I know hervery well.
I don't, I don't even know ifyou would notice when it
switches.
It is not some like dramatic,you know, the room is shaking,
(02:13):
the lights are blinking.
It's not like that at all.
It's very subtle, and I justhappen to know when it shifts,
and you'll hear my questionsshift with it as well.
And so I kind of changed the wayI'm asking questions once I
realize that she's actually in adifferent state.
The other thing that'sinteresting about this is so not
only did I not expect this tohappen, I had um nothing
planned.
(02:34):
And we end up talking about atone point when she's channeling,
she's specifically talking topeople who are in active
addiction, which I love so muchfor so many reasons.
Like we all, I think, need tohear words of hope and
inspiration on many differentlevels, but to get that sort of
(02:54):
directly from the other sidewhen you're in a place of
darkness or difficulty is areally beautiful gift.
And I it just I can't even, I'mnot even gonna say any more
about it because I think it'snot gonna do any justice to what
she gave this and what camethrough her, which is such an
incredible, incredible thing toexperience.
So the conversation starts alittle bit with controversy in
(03:16):
the crossroads between being apsychic and being an addict, and
we end up in in the realm ofhope.
Um, and so I'm just gonna letyou listen and I hope you enjoy
the ride.
SPEAKER_01 (03:36):
Okay.
Okay, so I go to rehab foralcohol addiction.
Let me preface what I'm sayingnow.
unknown (03:45):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (03:45):
And I am there and I am, I I I go in and I have, of
course, it's my first stunt atrehab, and I've never ever in my
life thought I would be re inrehab.
I'm almost a 60-year-old woman,and I'm in a rehab that I don't
have the resources for ahighfalutin, nice rehab.
(04:07):
You know, the ones with themassage and the massage and the
acupuncture and the bubblywaters.
And no, I am in a rehab whereeveryone there is, and I say
this with all respect and lovefor the people that get this
done because I don't know howyou get it done, and the artists
that do it, tattoos from head tohead to toe.
(04:28):
And I I have a new appreciationfor the art of tattoo.
And and not only that, but havebeen sent there for from prison,
jail, have spent time in prison,have anger issues, and are male
that it's co-ed as well, whichis sort of disturbing.
Uh, because I'm eitheraggressive and nothing like I've
(04:50):
been around this subset ofculture, and I'm an alcoholic
and they're all hard drug users.
Most of them are very difficulthard drug users.
So I'm there and everyone'ssaying, Oh, you know, all the
all the all the all the rehabcounselors are saying, Oh,
you're you go you're gonna findyou have everything in common.
(05:12):
And I'm looking around, going, Ihave nothing in common with
these people.
My roommate happens to be abutcher.
She is lovely.
And uh I got really lucky onthat score.
But however, all the other onesare in my face going, what do
you do for a living?
Like, uh I'm I'm feeling alittle sick right now.
(05:35):
I don't want to talk about itbecause you know, the first rule
of kind of rehab of is beinghonest and you're there to get
real and get through your shit,and so you can get the hell out
of there, ASAP.
And uh and finally I say, I'm apsychic.
And it goes around in the rehab,you know, that I'm a psychic.
And, you know, I can see thelooks of, yeah, sure you are, or
(05:59):
what's the fuck is this allabout?
Pardon my French, but you know,it's interesting.
Uh, so I'm not only old and odd,now I'm weird old and odd.
And uh weird, old, and odd.
And so, but as time goes on,what I really did realize is
that I am an addict.
(06:21):
I am an addict.
It doesn't matter your age, yourcircumstances, your walk.
We all have the same behaviors,we all have the same life uh
foibles and and journey.
It might look different, butit's in essence the same walk as
being human is sort of the samewalk.
But addicts have a particular,you know, lane they choose to go
(06:44):
down.
The road uh I would say lesstraveled, but unfortunately this
day it's probably the road mosttraveled, uh which is sad.
And I also find out when I getto know these people how
intuitive they are.
And sitting in a room of a bunchof intuitive empaths, which I
(07:06):
have not done before.
And I've always been the odd onenow, feeling things, knowing
things, sensing things, but in aroom of of people that have
substance abuse issues, I what Ihave found are some kind of over
the years, uh just watchingpeople and knowing people, is
(07:28):
that there are we're veryintuitive, we're very empathic,
we're very, because we're insurvival mode, which are all the
things intuition comes fromsurvival.
Everybody's like, oh, you havethe gooseies, your hair raises
on your arm, and something'sabout to happen, or you know
something.
Well, that's you know, when wewere at Crow Magnum, whether you
(07:49):
believe in in that theory ornot, our bodies are hardwired to
know when danger is present.
And that is the very foundationof intuition, knowing before we
see, so we can survive.
So, in essence, that theme rightthere starts when we're born.
We cry when something is wrong,you know, and I sometimes still,
(08:12):
when we're 60, cry whensomething is wrong.
You know, when we know somethingis upsetting and wrong and we
don't have words for it, what isthat?
Intuition, feeling, knowing.
And addicts have it in spadesbecause we run around in
survival mode.
We run around trying to hide ourfeelings or suppress it.
And unfortunately, a lot oftimes what psychedelics do, and
(08:35):
this has been known since the60s there ago, the invention of
uh or the the procreation andinvention of LSD and
psychedelics was to enhance yourfeelings.
And then we get to the thegeneration of uh, you know,
raves and you know that thatdrug, you know, the the I can't
(08:55):
think of the name of it, but thedrug that makes you feel more.
It was invented to make you feelfor relationships, to make you
feel more sexually, to make youfeel more in touch, in tune, uh,
is is really making people thenthat are feelers feel more.
It's just fascinating to me thatthis whole world of addicts and
(09:19):
this whole world of addiction isfilled with people that are in
past psychics and probablyhealers.
Yeah.
And I yeah, and are trying toget rid of it.
Yes.
Instead of, you know, going downa path of getting paid for it,
like I did, you know, it back inthe day, or using it like I
(09:43):
teach students to or otherpeople to do in their everyday
life to enhance your life and toactually know that you're
special and and not in a kind ofa defunct way as addicts feel.
Oh, yeah, yeah, you're special.
You have this disease, and we'retotal these kind of things to
have us put this kind of crookedcrown on to say, yeah, we're
special, and uh and we're alltogether and we're grouped
(10:04):
together, but we really are haveenhanced abilities.
And I don't know what theresearch would show, but I would
cut dozens to donuts that itwould show that addicts have a
much higher rate of psychicintuition, mediumship, healing
aptitude.
Definitely empathic aptitude.
SPEAKER_00 (10:23):
Yeah, I believe that.
Um, so what has been like thatwas in rehab.
So what happened when everyonefound out you were psychic?
SPEAKER_01 (10:34):
Well, the first time I was in rehab, everyone knew.
Okay.
And so people would take me tothe side and say, even the most
hardened of, I would say,criminals in that environment.
Um, so to me, that was hardened.
I don't know what anybody else,you know, like their rock is.
But you know, they had intoprison, they had sold drugs,
they had done drugs, and andthis is my first encounter with
(10:57):
with that kind of um with thatkind of situation.
Uh they are very uh intuitiveand kind and would take me to
the side and say, hey, you know,this happened to me, or this, I
had this dream, or what do youthink about?
I saw my grandmother's ghost,whatever.
Uh everybody has had anexperience.
I would say almost everyone hashad an intuitive experience of
(11:21):
some sort, a knowing somebody.
Oh, to the to the smallest, tothe largest.
Oh, I know I was just thinkingof you and you called to uh
which I put in the minorcategory, um, to uh the large
ones of oh my gosh, I sawsomething, maybe something
tragic.
I saw a world event and ithappened, or I saw someone, I
felt somebody was dead dying,and then I got a call.
(11:43):
They were, they, they had theyhad passed, or to um, I see
things.
Um, and you really are seeingthings.
You're you're not uh your mindis not altered on any kind of
substance or anything else inlife.
You see, you wake up and you seea ghost, or you hear things, or
you know things.
Um, these events happened toeveryone, and they were
(12:05):
happening to people that I hadmet in rehab more than the
everyone was taking me to theside and asking uh about it, and
more so uh in that culture andthat in the in in that
environment than I have anywhereelse.
I mean, I've been to dinnerparties, I have friends, I have
this, and people know what I do.
(12:26):
And a lot of people aren't thatcurious.
I would say addiction andaddicts by nature, if you're
looking at your addiction, youryour working steps, or you're
trying to do something else,Buddhism.
There's a lot of different pathsfor recovery, you're looking at
your own behavior, thereforeyou're sifting through your life
and things that are not easilyuh processed or explainable, or
(12:51):
if you are in therapy or are inrehab and you're saying, you
know, this thing keeps happeningto me.
And I'm I don't know why.
How explain this one, you know,guru or therapist, or you know,
and and you don't have someonethat can hear that, then it's
like something else that makesyou different than or strange
than and makes you feel off andweird and adds to the reason
(13:13):
that you might want to use asubstance instead of someone
that says, Oh my gosh, I havethat every day.
To get in line, get in linebetween five other, ten other
people in this room, right?
To find out that this issomething that is really
occurring quite frequently.
And so after so in rehab, thatwas really interesting.
And then when I got out of rehaband started going, you know,
(13:36):
into the into the rooms, as theysay, of addiction, um, and and
working in in 12-step programs,I really realized that most
people have this and are veryempathic and very sensitive and
really tuned in.
And some people are reallycurious and some people aren't.
(13:57):
Uh, I really don't announce, Idon't proselytize in meetings
what I do.
Yeah, I'm I'm be psychic mediumand addict.
You know, that doesn't come out.
I'm being addict, I you know,uh, but it gets around.
I and especially because I livein a small town, and people will
(14:19):
reach out, they are curiousbecause you're you're you're
wounded and you're trying topush down your feelings and your
senses instead of being rewardedfor having those really
intelligent, insightful gifts,you're trying to get rid of them
and trying to heal from feeling,which is not really the path.
(14:41):
The path is feel, heal, process,relate, and live a good life.
But who is addressing theotherworldly that happens, the
spiritual?
We have higher power, but do wehave someone that says, yeah,
you you're you're you're seeingghosts?
(15:03):
Okay, perfectly normal.
Yeah.
I mean, who does that on anyregular basis?
SPEAKER_00 (15:09):
Well, and so curious, like if you after I had
been I was like maybe threemonths sober, and I the first
thing that happened that Inoticed um was my ears started
ringing.
And they started it was all thetime.
And I thought something waswrong with me, and then I
thought I was fucking crazy.
Um and like then at one point intime you and I talked about that
(15:31):
and like what like I always wantto know what everything means
because I'm me and I overthinkeverything.
Um but and since then many otherthings have happened, and I
remember talking to you aboutbeing you were like you said you
said that one point that I was apsychic and I was like, I am not
a psychic.
And I because I'm not a psychicthe way that you're a psychic,
(15:53):
right?
Right.
And understanding that this theway this unfolds or develops or
changes or what it means for oneperson may be very different
than what it means for someoneelse.
SPEAKER_01 (16:04):
Correct.
And and that is true.
And the earring, just ifanybody, anyone has it, it
happens to people.
First of all, it is a realdisorder.
That's an it is think they callit.
So if you are having it, youknow, of course, you know, uh uh
uh in my profession, as in themedical profession, I I practice
do no harm.
So get it checked out.
(16:25):
If it comes and goes, it's alsoa pressure thing.
You know, I I am, if anythingelse, the least woo-woo person
of woo-woo people.
I have to make sure thateverything is not human,
medically, otherwise electronicbefore I can say this is what
this means.
But uh it happened to me aswell.
(16:47):
And it's really uh interestingbecause it's aboriginal and in
in nature that when your earsring, that's where it came from,
it means you're getting adownload of information from an
outside source.
And your it bypasses your aka uhthinking brain, if you will.
(17:08):
So you're getting information,and it doesn't surprise me at
all that it happens to peoplewhen they get clean or sober,
get off drugs, get offsubstances, because your brain
isn't available to processcertain things because it's in
an altered state.
So all of a sudden, you know,all this information is kind of
like a like a ticker tape aboveyou, ready to, you know, you
(17:30):
you're able and willing toprocess it now.
So it drops in.
So the earringing is is reallyinteresting.
And I would be interested tosay, you know, like people that
are listening to to this to thisdiscussion, how many of you have
had are addicts and how many ofyou have experienced things
after you've gotten clean orsober?
You know, like what does thatlook like for you?
(17:52):
Because it should become uh moreintense.
And how do you deal with thatwhen you can't use a substance
to push down the thoughts andthe feelings and the outside
information that makes you feellike you're going crazy on some
level?
Um, the degree of how how thatthat affects you.
(18:15):
And to to really, I would loveto have a 12-step uh intuitive,
yeah, intuitive, a 12-stepsurrender step one.
You are powerless over yourintuitive and and ghosts.
I don't know, you know, somekind of fun way to address this
(18:39):
or you know, it to to say, youknow, it's okay.
You know, it yeah, you'redifferent, you're you're you're
strange and in and whatever.
We all are in some degree, butyeah, it's all right.
It's okay.
And you can do with it whateveryou want to do with it.
You don't have to, you know, doit for a living.
You can take it into youreveryday life and it just
(19:00):
enhances and it just allows youto accept a piece of yourself.
All of this walk is aboutaccepting pieces of ourselves
and not pushing them away.
SPEAKER_00 (19:10):
Yeah.
So and that was one of thethings I didn't I realized that
afterwards that I could feel somuch.
And I didn't know that part ofwhy I was numbing out so much is
I didn't want to feel people.
Um, but I didn't have languagefor that.
SPEAKER_01 (19:24):
Well, there is no language.
There is no language for the, ifyou will, supernatural world.
Yeah, uh, I struggle with it allthe time.
I'm like, pardon my lack of ofwords.
And this sound, it might soundtrite.
It might sound, I mean, like Ihate the word ghost.
I hate the word psychic.
I mean, I would love to be, Iwould love for language to
(19:47):
develop in my field or in thatarena.
And the fact that it hasn't justgoes to prove that people don't
spend a lot of time there, or itwould.
We would have slang, we don'thave slang.
SPEAKER_00 (19:59):
We don't have a lot of words for anything in my
realm.
Why do you think people don'task you that much?
It's one of the things thatbought like baffles me because
I'm so curious all the timeabout your experience.
Why do you think no one everasks you?
SPEAKER_01 (20:14):
Uh well, I would have to guess.
Uh I think well, I I know, youknow, people have told these
some things, but over the years,obviously.
But I think that part of it isbecause they're embarrassed that
they're having this reaction, orI'm going to tell you I have no
idea, which is going to scareyou even more that something is
(20:38):
wrong.
A lot of times this is put inthe mental of disorders
category.
And so it, you know, and a lotof people that um have addiction
have a dual diagnosis.
We have a lot of stuff going on.
So if you say, you know, I'mhearing voices and I'm gonna
say, sorry, uh, you need to goget that checked out.
That doesn't, I'm not a doctor.
(21:00):
I'm not telling you there'ssomething wrong with you.
I'm just saying in my and and Ido explain this.
I I just don't let that lie.
As you know, I'm a I'm a heavyperson on explaining the human
experience along with thepsychic phenomenon.
And I think it's so importantbecause you will scare people if
you're in my profession and youjust say, yeah, you're hearing
voices too.
No, that's not really happeningto you.
(21:21):
Go to a doctor.
That is so, so um just ininhumane to do to somebody as
well.
I think people are afraid.
That's why they don't come.
I think that they're afraid tohear or see.
And what if I say, yeah, yeah,you are seeing ghosts?
Well, that's kind of scary too.
What do I do about that?
Well, there are, you know, I dohave tools after 25 years of
(21:43):
practicing this.
You know, I do have things youcan do.
Um, when you go to somebody thathas been doing this for a long
period of time, then you do, Imight not have great words, but
I do have some advice on how tohow to deal with things.
And I think that there's fear, Ithink that there's the unknown,
I think that people think, oh,she doesn't want to be bothered
(22:05):
with it.
Uh, I don't I think that I thinkthere are a plethora of reasons,
but um I find it refreshing whensomebody wants to know what why
I do what I do.
And as you know, because youasked a gazillion questions, uh,
which I love, but a lot of timesit's like, I have no idea.
(22:25):
I have no idea why I receive thethings I receive.
I have no, you know, and andthat's another another
interesting phenomenon that thishappens to people, but no one is
willing to do the research inthat, in that, in, in this area,
in this arena.
SPEAKER_00 (22:41):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (22:42):
And it's such a big part of people's lives, and it's
still kind of in the dark ages.
SPEAKER_00 (22:46):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (22:47):
You know, discovery of witches, if you will.
SPEAKER_00 (22:49):
Yeah.
Yes.
So how many times were you inrehab?
SPEAKER_01 (22:54):
Oh, let's see.
One, two and a half.
Meaning I was did two 30-daystents and one of like a long
weekend for uh what you knowwhat I'm seeing I'm I'm I'm not
remembering what it's callednow.
When you're when you're tryingto get off of, you know, when
(23:15):
they medically take you off of asubstance.
Detox?
Detox.
Thank you.
SPEAKER_00 (23:20):
Yes.
There it is.
Um, what do you think at whatpoint what changed or what made
it work?
Like where did you shift fromgoing backwards to like changed
into moving forward?
SPEAKER_01 (23:34):
Well, isn't that the magic question?
Yeah, right.
Um, you know, and when I cameinto the when I started going to
meetings and stuff, uh, I hearda lot of people say, you're a
miracle, you're that you'resitting here.
And statistically, okay, and I'mnot big on math.
Uh, yes, probably.
Um, however, I think everyonegets to their, it's very simple,
(23:58):
and simple things are reallydifficult.
Simple constructs.
Yes, there is a God.
You know, simple ideas arereally just believe, are very
difficult to wrap our headsaround.
We want a lot, our we want ourbrains want a lot of information
to to make a story.
So when people say you'resitting here, you're a miracle,
I'm always why.
(24:20):
Okay, statistically, okay, fine,check.
But really, why?
Why did I get it and so manyother people have not?
I think part of that is I thinkdifferent, there's recipes for
everyone.
First of all, the pain of ofsuffering becomes larger than
the pain of not suffering.
(24:44):
And that's just human.
So we make a decision not to bein pain.
And then I think from thedecision not to be in pain is is
my life enhanced by not using asubstance.
And that's where I think a lotof people fail on this step.
Because yes, we're miserable.
Yes, our lives are torn apart.
Yes, you know, for me, all ofthat was true.
(25:07):
But I have nowhere to go fromfrom this from this space except
somewhere.
I yeah, I don't know what thatlooks like in a different type
of life.
I can't go back to the one I hadbefore because I trashed it.
I can't, I don't know what theone forward looks like.
So there's a lot of fear.
I think stubbornness.
And as addicts, we are soperfectionist, controlling,
(25:31):
stubborn creatures.
And that's why a lot of us don'tmake it because we use that to
our own detriment.
But if we can use that and startusing it in small ways when we
first get into recovery topropel us just to take the next
right step, as they say.
Now I'm going to start using,you know, the the the slogans
(25:53):
and the sayings that I I reallydislike but are so apt.
That you know, they've beenaround because they they're
true, they're truisms.
That when you do the next beststubborn, right, perfectionist
thing, but it's in your behalf,it's it it's it's to suit serve
you and more importantly, othersthat gives us something called
(26:15):
purpose.
Uh then we start a differenttrajectory and our brains start
to heal, our bodies start toheal, and we we get better.
Now, with that being said, abunch of pain can come can come
in on any, you know, triggers,as they say, or somebody does
something crappy, you lose yourjob, you know, whatever it may
(26:36):
be.
SPEAKER_00 (26:36):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (26:37):
Um, there's a lot going on in our world right now
that we want to tune out.
I mean, people just can't comehome and turn on the TV and
blissfully slip away.
And in my era of the wonderfulworld or Disney or, you know,
all in the family, or you know,whatever it might be, NCIS, what
it is these days, or uh, youknow, Netflix.
Yes, you can, but in betweenthat, you're hearing noise all
(27:00):
the time.
You're hearing all the stuffthat's going on in the world.
And if you're sensitive, itadds, it's just another layer of
the crap Sunday that is stressin our lives.
And we, it just it's difficult,it's difficult to escape.
So the knowing comes in andsays, okay, you're you're you're
(27:22):
having a moment, you're havingsome reactions, you're having
this and that.
But on top of that, you're alsoa really sensitive person.
And I hate that word sensitiveperson.
You're very empathic person.
So, okay, how do you, you know,just the general acceptance that
that's who you are, another partof you can help relieve that and
(27:43):
also help with not wanting topick up and drown out all the
all the noise we have in ourlives.
SPEAKER_00 (27:49):
So I have a question.
You have you talked aboutpurpose for a minute.
Um and people, I'm curiousbecause sometimes people will
refer to like their addiction orthat time when they were, you
know, however many years it was,as like they failed or it was a
problem, or you know, theysomehow fucked things up for
lack of better words.
Um But is it part of the plan?
(28:10):
Like, is it did they really gothat far from from off rails or
was it helpful?
SPEAKER_01 (28:19):
I believe that every experience we have, and this is
just my personal belief, ishelpful.
Now it might not be pleasant,but it's a you know, and as as
you know, many people in in inthe new age or guruy or the
psychic, whatever field say it'sa lesson.
Um and that is the best word Ithink that we can use.
(28:41):
I'm just tired of it.
But I I think that we have thesethese things that uh to survive
here in human form, becausethat's who we are on this level
and at this time is human.
And the human experience isdense and it's difficult, but it
can also be when we embrace itand we get healthy, really a
(29:02):
sensual, and I mean sensual inall those words, you know, uh
sensual smells, and this humanbody can do some really fun
things and really see things andinvent things, and our brains
can can go to places and travelplaces that that uh you know, we
we're really inter humans arereally interesting.
(29:24):
And so purpose gives us uh areason for being in our bodies
at this time on this planet.
Why are we here?
There can be I wouldn't say athousand reasons, but there can
be a good ten reasons.
You're a mother, you your job,your you what drives you, what
(29:48):
what heals you, what and thatchanges over our lifetime as we
age as well.
Being a child, just survivingchildhood, just surviving every
day.
That's purpose and a number.
itself but when we get to apoint as um maslott's hierarchy
which which is sort of like youknow our our base uh when we
(30:08):
have our base functions met andwe start to evolve even as
addicts we start to evolve upthat hierarchy and we have our
needs met life starts gettingbetter da da da then purpose
takes on a different meaningwhat do I want to do to help me
enjoy this human experience andsometimes people call that the
(30:30):
pink cloud and what recoverydoes in this about bring
recovery into this is reallyspecial in this one aspect is
that it says give back to otherswhat you have been so freely
given that is biblicallybiblical biblical importance
(30:58):
because unless you are truly inyour and you you truly have
you're truly truly strugglingand that might be with other
issues even as sick or asunhealthy as we are if we can do
(31:19):
one thing for another personjust to listen and if that's
even somebody helping us at thetime but to say how was your day
if we can look at that as a formof getting out of ourselves we
can start to feel better.
It is the one tried and truething that helps our addicts and
humans into purpose then westart to want to do it because
(31:44):
it makes us feel good.
It's not that we made the otherperson feel good it's that it
made us feel something goodabout ourselves.
And that is why purpose is soimportant is because it gives us
it gives us a framework and away to move through the human
experience and when bad lessonsnot bad or difficult things come
(32:07):
in we can run it up the flagpoleof purpose and see where it
lands okay did I need to knowthis did I have to go through
this why did I go through thisof course there's a reason
there's always a reason but dowe give a reason a reason
meaning how do we explain thisexperience to ourselves do we
(32:32):
make uh addiction into somethingthat's purposeful and meaningful
and how do we do that do we haveto you know do the big things
you know start nonprofits starta podcast right like do we have
to do the things or can we dothe little things and I would
(32:54):
say yes to all of the above andthat's what purpose is purpose
is all I always know when I hitpurpose with people and it's
scalable.
It can be the littlest of thingsand it can be the largest of
things that you do with yourlife.
SPEAKER_00 (33:06):
Can you give me an example of someone's purpose
that's scalable like where theymight stop here or where they
might keep going can I use youas an example?
SPEAKER_01 (33:15):
Sure go for it.
Okay okay so when you first whenwe first met you came to me and
um we were talking about yourpotential in in the into it
intuitive field and and I getall excited and and I'm like
yeah you can be a psychic lookat this look at this and you're
(33:36):
looking at me like yeah crazylady um that's exactly what I
said when I was five I want togrow up and be a psychic because
you know and I forget I didn'tdo that either I would have been
horrified you know no I'm goingyou know like I don't even want
to you know grow up to even seewhat that looks like.
And so we didn't speak for quitea period of time um after that
(34:00):
we mean we talked and stuff butwe didn't like engage in that
and in and it's always reallysad to me people ask me what
their purpose is and I get thisbeautiful picture of a lie and
and it scares people or it's notwhat you think it is.
And so that's a lot of times whypeople don't ask me questions
for the very reason that thatinteraction between us.
(34:22):
But then it kept niggling atyou.
And so you came back and youknow and years later of our
friendship and and and workingtogether we went through a
process and you were curious.
Curiosity is in resilience.
So you kept asking questions andhearing the answers and and
(34:42):
saying okay maybe I can utilizethis in other ways in my life I
don't have to be a psychic.
No you don't that's not reallywhat I said by the way but uh if
I go back in time which you knowI don't I you know you I
probably said you can use thisin other ways but if you're just
looking at me you're thinkingI'm I'm I'm describing I I I'm
wanting you to join the cult.
(35:03):
No, I don't I just want you tobe good with your intuition and
if you have really greatintuition my gosh let's do
something with this and sobecause it's gonna keep keep on
and and it gets it's you know soI think what's fascinating is
you you said no and then itbothered you or niggled you I
don't know exactly what it did.
(35:23):
And you were curious I thinkmore than anything and you came
back.
You could have stopped and goneabout your life and it and been
fine right but then when westarted working together and you
started saying yes to learningmore about this this side of
your life and what that did wasopen up a whole different
(35:46):
reality for you that you couldexperience life differently than
you had before you realized youhad this amazing intuition and
this amazing gift to A helpothers and B utilize your
intuition and your empathy andall the all those goodies along
(36:07):
with what what we looked at aspurpose and for you you wanted
to give back and how how we howwe together work together to
kind of get you on a path tocraft that you could have
stopped any step of the way youcould have said okay I just want
to be a sponsor okay inaddiction okay I you know I just
(36:31):
I want to go back to school andbe a therapist uh there are many
things you could have stoppedalong the way and what's
interesting is what I alwayskind of saw for you is a very
large life and here I hate wordsum large meaning large potential
(36:51):
you could you could dramaticallychange addiction in in any way
you want in a way that youwanted to with love and
compassion and and and wisdomand smarts and and how that came
about was through how can we howcan you do that best and a lot
of this is working with theintuitive side and in the
(37:14):
information that's given butalso the um the human what can
we do okay we get theinformation now how can we apply
this to you as a human and youknow maybe that's working in
addiction um which you've doneall of this but you didn't stop
you you're like okay well I wantmore I want more and and I think
(37:38):
because you're meant to do morenow we're speaking about you
other people will if would stopright where you are right now
and that's with podcasts that'swith helping people in addiction
that's with you can keep uh yourJ O B your job as I like to call
it which enhances your life andallows you to do these other
(38:00):
things aka for free withoutmaking money but do you want to
step in the world of servicewhere you you make money as
something you love to do andthat's really what we all want
to do.
And that's where you are you'regoing to do you know you're
podcasting books um your ownyour own business with addiction
(38:21):
your own nonprofit you knowthese are things that create a
platform for you and and purposenow if you had stopped with I
just want to be a sponsor doeslarge or small make a difference
to the to you you have had freewill and a choice every step of
(38:41):
this journey when something getstoo scary you could have stopped
for a year and said no I don'twant to do anymore I want to
stay right here or you couldhave stopped right where you
were you know five years ago andsaid this is what I want this is
all I want I just want to befree from addiction and that is
admirable and that is purposethen we find purpose in other
(39:03):
ways in your life and and itwould have been glorious and
wonderful there's no right orwrong here it just is do you
want to keep growing um and ingrowth I don't mean as a good
thing it just is a thing you sayyes to how much do you want to
(39:24):
how how much of a part ofpurpose do you want to be a part
of do you want it to be you knowan eighth of the pie a quarter
of the pie or the pie do youwant to live purpose if you want
to live purpose people that livepurpose are I will say usually
doctors you know like it's ahigh energy you're all in you
(39:46):
live your life all for purposeand that's that's a big that's a
big ask it's like a it's allit's what you do.
That's not to say that you don'thave other things that give you
joy because you do you justlearn and being in addiction you
learn to have balance where alot of people that live their
(40:08):
purpose kind of have to gothrough these hard difficult
lessons and um so purpose isscalable.
So you could have stopped anystep of the way and you can
still stop you can stop at anytime and say I want to retire.
And does that mean that you'reany less successful as a human
(40:30):
in this lifetime with purposeand what you've done absolutely
not it's just what you arecomfortable with in your
timeline.
But you my friend are such aninteresting human that you say I
keep saying yes I want more Iwant more I want more and in a
really beautiful way that you'resaying yes to purpose itself and
(40:54):
whatever that brings you withoutreally knowing what that's going
to end up looking like.
And it just keeps growing fromthat place.
And that's called faith.
The faith walk so that was areally long-winded answer.
SPEAKER_00 (41:10):
That was really beautiful though and I like
where you landed on the faithwalk because I think people ask
that question is this enough?
Should I keep going?
What does it look like?
Right.
And when they stand at acrossroads how to make that
choice and how to lean intowhat's right for them.
Do you have any thoughts on howhow they can get in touch with
what is the best choice for themif they should go left or right
(41:33):
or how to lean in more topurpose if they don't know.
SPEAKER_01 (41:37):
Yes I I think if you're fine where you are and
you're like I this I'm reallyhappy if you look around at your
life and you're I mean not thatwe have to be oh my gosh my life
is grand but if you're happy andcontent I say content things are
going well fine stay there.
But however you know as we growand we walk this walk things
(42:01):
happen.
And if something shifts orchanges in your life and you
want to to do more to be more togive more or to do less but when
you do less you find you have ahole in your life and you don't
know how to fill it that couldbe retirement that could be a
death that could be a change ofa divorce that could be a job
(42:23):
change that could be I mean manythings many life things happen
to us then that is a wonderfulplace to start looking at where
am I really happy?
Is there something I've alwayswanted to do and I think the
word that at that juncture getcurious and there's a lot of
(42:46):
fear with curiosity rightbecause we don't understand it's
like we're taught as kids ohdon't be too curious you know
don't because we're at we'reborn curious.
We're born curiosity orsomething it did but it really
doesn't you know that thatsaying I really dislike I'll
have a pride in truisms I wouldsay yeah for the baby walking
(43:09):
around on the floor yes butthere's an adult that's supposed
to be there that tempers thatcuriosity.
When you're an adult or whenyou're even not an adult I would
say when your brain is still youknow in your teenage years and
and and upwards be curious inhealthy ways.
You know go go if you're curiousabout I don't know I was really
(43:32):
really weirdly curious kid itprobably doesn't surprise but
like I I thought I wanted to bea mortician for a time because
it wasn't the mortician it wasthe fascination with what
happens when we die because I'mon the looking back at it none
all of this makes sense becauseof what I ended up doing with my
purpose.
Yeah but I just said okay that'sreally weird but I fortunately
(43:55):
had a really weird friend whowanted to write him a movie on
death.
So he went with me and so hedidn't think it was weird at all
the weirder the better.
So you know surround yourselfwith people that are curious and
and in your tribe as well thatare curious about weird things
or or you know it might not beweird things it might be
everyday things.
You know you're curious aboutfirefighting you're curious
(44:18):
about whatever it might be andto me that's an everyday thing
because in my world that's justan everyday thing.
You're curious about aliens Idon't know go figure it out be
the one that gets to be theexpert on why we don't know what
we know or why we do know youknow take that curiosity and
(44:39):
lean into it and that's reallyat any point in your life I
don't care if you're listeningto this and you're 80 at any
point in your life curiositylean in and try and conquer the
fear I know that's really reallydifficult but if you can if you
(45:00):
do first and then think aboutthe fear later and take somebody
crazy with you that that isn'tafraid or is as afraid as you
but you're doing it together youknow that that is that is that
is a great next step coming fullcircle that's a great next step
and that will always lead youtowards health wealth purpose
(45:24):
and a long loving life so whatwould you tell someone who feels
like they don't feel supportedor they're met with a bunch of
negativity or people that don'tbelieve that or don't cheer them
on or shut them down that'ssimple and remember I at near
the beginning of thisconversation I said simple
(45:46):
simple is difficult.
Simple is one of the mostdifficult things we can do get
yourself out of the situationand that is sometimes the most
difficult thing we can do andespecially if we're looking at
addiction get yourself out ofthings people places and things
(46:07):
that are not supportive of yourwell being and if you're an
active addiction right now andlistening to this then your
brain is going hey bitch I'mfeeling pretty good right now.
I just heard part of that andI'm feeling really good because
I'm gonna go find my purposetomorrow I'm going to go do this
(46:28):
tomorrow.
And but between now and then I Ihave something to look forward
to so I'm gonna use you know themillion reasons we use or you're
crazy I have nothing left and Iwant to sit here and use is that
really you know the next bestthing for you are you curious
about where you are right now Iwould say an addiction I don't
(46:52):
think you're curious ever Ithink you're trying to numb and
not be curious.
You're not trying to lean inyou're trying to lean out and so
if you're trying to lean out getout and I say that and it was
(47:13):
very one of the hardest thehardest the most difficult thing
I've had to do in 61 years of mylife was the most difficult path
that I walked was getting cleansober whatever you want to call
that move move your body even ifit's just into the next room
(47:35):
just get up and do somethingthat is healthy for you first if
you can if you can't keep tryingbecause there's no reason I
should be here today absolutelyzero reason that I am and I'm
(47:56):
glad I am yeah for the most partthere are days I'm not but we
all have those but I think oncewe get past addiction allows us
to have it's a gift in therespect that it allows us to
have perspective into ourselveswhich most people are are never
given and and it's it's neverwant to look at it allows that
(48:19):
and it also allows us to behealthier versions and people
that we can't even imagine andhave thoughts and ideas and
friends and go places that wewould have never experienced
before.
And what is that if that is notjoyful purpose exciting
adventure it's living and that'swhat if you're in addiction and
(48:46):
you want to get out of addictionthat's what you have to look
forward to a purpose and a lifeof living and loving yourself
first and then others that wasreally beautiful my last
question too is for anyone who'slistening what do they need to
know the most it gets bettereverything gets better it might
(49:17):
get worse before it gets betterit might flatten out for 10
years you might be walking inthe desert that there will it
will get better I promise itgets better it gets worse it
gets better it gets worse andthat's how we grow anyone that's
listening to this if you canhave a little bit of faith in
(49:43):
something something that is aglimmer of hope that oh my gosh
I'm still alive today I have noreason to be still alive today
but I'm still alive today whatdo I want to do with this day
like can I do something a littlebit different just know it gets
(50:04):
better if you can find a reasonto get up off the floor I love
that I love you I love you tooyou but you got me teary there
at the end because it's becauseinside it gets better it lives
(50:27):
hope yes it does hope faiththese words that we we we throw
away throw around yeah they'rereally meant to be lived you
have to live faith you have tolive hope you have to live into
it and it's not always they'regreat words grace we have to
(50:52):
live grace we have to live lovewe have to live hope and to do
that we have to live to justknow it gets better you're
you're here if you're hereyou're meant to be here and in
my world if you're hearing meand you're not here sorry yeah
(51:14):
but you know there's stillthings to do you don't get you
know death isn't the end all beall you don't get to die and
just you don't feel anythingpeople there's lessons in heaven
believe it or not and I hatethat word heaven but I don't
know what else to call it thereyou still keep growing you still
keep learning we are we areenergy of of life it it we we
(51:36):
never stop being so hang inthere it gets better thank you
you're very welcome it was apleasure thank you so much I
appreciate it more than you knowI hope I know they do too well I
thank you for the work thatyou're doing and bringing
different viewpoints andthoughts and and discussions and
(52:00):
and curious conversations intothis arena it's important I
guess thank you where purposetakes me yes we will young lady
but your psychic knows unlessyou choose to say no so far that
hasn't been the case so no thathas not and you've gone fast and
furious up the ladder yes youhave thank you so much for being
(52:27):
here it means more than you knowif you enjoyed this episode
please share it with a friend orleave a quick rating or review
wherever you listen to podcasts.
SPEAKER_00 (52:34):
It helps more people find the show.
If you want more of me head onover to NataniAlison.com and
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