October 28, 2024 • 33 mins
In this episode I take you through what it was like for me as a teen and young adult experiencing anxiety, but more importantly how I overcame it. I address which tools, mindsets, and therapies have helped me the most.
Trigger Warning: details of experiencing anxiety and panic are discussed.
You can contact me via kristen@sakalyamassage.com or follow me at https://www.instagram.com/sakalyamassage/ if you would like more information about any of these modalities.
I've included links below:
The Healing Code Book by Alexader Lloyd
https://thehealingcodes.com/book/
The Healer's Blueprint
https://www.tampendleton.com/
More about NET
https://www.netmindbody.com/more-information/what-is-net/
More about NAET
https://www.naet.com/
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
I'm Kristen Russell, and this isThe Wholly Empowered Podcast,
where we dive into all thingsholistic healing and open our
minds, hearts, and paradigms tonew ideas so we can live our
most empowered, healthy, joyfullives.
This is episode two of WhollyEmpowered.
I'm Kristen Russell and I'll beyour host.
(00:23):
In this episode, I'm going to bediving deeper into my story and
I have a lot of, I have a lot ofthings that I've experienced
that contribute to why I havechosen more alternative
medicine, holistic paths withhow I handle my wellness.
(00:48):
I'm not going to.
Deep dive into all of them.
I'm going to give you a littleoverview of a few, but I think
the anxiety issue that I talkedabout in the last episode is
probably the most relevant andjust what I need to talk about
today.
So these episodes are a littlebit heavy, heavier, and I,
(01:08):
that's not my intention to haveit be that way all the time.
We're gonna have fun, and we'regonna laugh, and it's gonna be
great in the future.
But yeah, these ones are alittle bit more heavy, so bear
with me, but my main goal is togive you Just resources and the
things that helped me along theway.
(01:29):
And just as an overview forcontext about why I'm into all
these different, physical,spiritual, mental, emotional
health Things I feel like I'vehad some experience with just
about all of them.
I had a gut issue for like 12years and did everything did the
(01:51):
elimination diets and thesupplements and the probiotics
and just like researching whichones actually work best and
getting to know my body and whatit likes and what it doesn't
like and I eventually did somefrequency healing that actually
helped me a ton with that.
Grief has been a big thing forme.
That's been a big theme in mylife, just dealing with grief.
(02:13):
I struggled with my weight inhigh school a lot and that's
been a theme.
We've had a lot of mental healthissues in our family and just
things like that where it kindof hits you in the face and
you're like, Oh I want to figureout how to handle this in the
best way that I know how.
(02:33):
So for me, it's been a lot ofholistic.
Alternative methods just becauseof the way I.
I was raised one, my mom thatwas kind of her first.
Go.
To.
You know, let's try somethingnatural.
And.
That's worked out really wellfor me.
And I just, I feel very drawn tothings that feel.
(02:54):
I feel like they're in alignmentwith.
How our bodies work naturally.
And so.
That was kind of what I wasexposed to first.
And that's, what's justresonated as I've gone along
and.
You know, when that's the firstthing.
And.
It works then you don't reallyend up trying other things..
So.
I was young.
(03:15):
When this all started and my.
I think it wasn't the.
The norm for kids.
Kids to get on prescriptions foranxiety, as much as it is now
and not.
It just wasn't my mom.
She wasn't gonna go there unlessit was absolutely.
Necessary.
So.
That's just kind of how itnaturally went for.
Me and that's just continued on.
(03:36):
And so I've had all thesedifferent.
Things, all these, you know,Physical.
Mental emotional things come upand I've handled.
Then in a more natural way and.
And it's just kind.
Kind of been working out.
I've is there things I've.
Asked for.
For guidance on from my source.
And I feel like I've gotten.
(03:58):
Some answers that.
That have been.
Things have come up.
But I wouldn't have.
Necessarily chosen before.
Like.
Most of the time, I feel like Iget answers and I'm like
really?.
This thing, this thing came up,I'm looking into it.
It seems a.
(04:18):
A little weird, but I'm going totry it.
You know, it seems a little.
It seems a little out like.
Outside of my norm or it'ssomething that I have to kind
of.
Think outside the box for.
And.
When I've done that it's been,the reward has been really good.
You know, it's been.
(04:40):
A solution that.
As has just been the answer Iwas looking for.
So anyway, that's kind of whyI'm so passionate about all
these things.
I've just, just had someexperience.
(05:02):
So anyway, so that's just anoverview of my whole, I don't
want to give my whole healthhistory on all over the
internet.
Um, but I just, I've just dealtwith a lot of little things
throughout my life.
So anyway, but the anxiety, thatwas one that I feel like I've
(05:22):
actually been able to overcomeLike it doesn't really affect me
like it used to.
And I think we all get anxiety.
Like I think it gets overpathologized sometimes.
It's like everyone experiencesanxiety.
That's perfectly normal humanexperience.
Right.
So yeah.
So I definitely still experienceanxiety.
(05:44):
But it's not anything like itwas.
So Just to give you kind of somebackground, we lived in the
Pacific Northwest growing up.
It was beautiful.
I would ride my bike around likeevery day we were homeschooled.
It was idyllic.
My childhood was just reallygreat.
And once we moved to Californiawhen I was 14, that's when
(06:06):
things just got hard.
Life just got hard after thatfor many reasons, just kind of
one thing after the other, but.
So my mom got sick when I was12, which was Washington still,
but then we moved and then Ijust developed this really
intense anxiety at about 15, Ithink is when it probably
(06:26):
started.
It was my sophomore year of highschool.
That year was just a living hellfor me.
It was horrible.
I was just in this constantstate of fight or flight.
And I'm going to go over, uh,some of the symptoms that I had.
And so I don't know if a triggerwarning is appropriate.
I kind of have mixed feelingsabout those, but just so you
(06:49):
know, I'm going to go over somesymptoms that I, that I
experienced just mainly, becauseI want people to know if you're
experiencing this too, You'renot the only one.
I, maybe it's a common thing asa teenager to think you're the
only one experiencing things,but I just felt like such a like
anomaly, It's like no oneunderstands what I'm going
(07:11):
through and it made it so hardto talk about it and so I think
it's important to just sharewhat we experience because it
helps other people know thatthey're not alone so anyway, I'm
just gonna go over some thingsYou that I experienced, kind of
the triggers for me for thisanxiety and some of the things
that were going on in my mindand body.
(07:33):
So if you haven't listened toepisode one, that'll give you
some more context.
I don't feel like I need to goback over it all, but
essentially I just developedthis anxiety.
Anytime I had to go to school, Iwas in this kind of out of body
fight or flight.
Thing, especially that wholeyear.
(07:53):
It was really scary.
Anytime I would travel,especially if it wasn't with my
family, but even sometimes withmy family, like it was so
pervasive, this feeling, and IIt was kind of like the
situational claustrophobia.
That's like the best way I canput it, where If I felt like I
(08:14):
was stuck anywhere and in asituation where I couldn't
leave, like at school, I wasenough of a people pleaser.
I didn't want to, upset anyoneor get in trouble.
And school was so, I had beenhomeschooled before this.
And so I moved to a new state,which was like culture shock.
And then we moved to, you know,and then I started going to
(08:36):
public school, which was crazy.
I had been used to being treatedlike an adult.
By the adults around me, tons ofrespect.
They trusted me.
And then you go to public schooland you're an inmate, you know,
like they treat you like you aresuspect all the time.
And I was just like, I don'tdeserve this anyway.
So that was really shocking forme and really hard adjustment.
(08:59):
So it was really hard for me tosit in these classrooms and feel
like I couldn't leave and I hadto ask even to go to the
bathroom and it's a big to doand that was really stressful
for me and it kind of just cameout in this like, you know,
school was just such a trigger.
So, yeah, anywhere that I feltlike I was stuck.
(09:21):
So, planes, you know, cars,there were so many, so many
things, but just basically if Ifelt like I was out of control,
like if I felt like I didn'thave control of myself, and
where I was, and what I wasexperiencing, it really
triggered me.
And the movies.
Guys, the movies.
(09:42):
My mom loved the movies.
She always wanted to go.
It was her escape.
And I, I, she always be like, goto the movies with me.
And I was like, because I loveyou, I will go to the movies
with you.
And that just puzzled her somuch.
But, I'll go into that morelater, but the movies were a
huge trigger.
(10:02):
Anyway, so some of the thingsthat helped me.
So in high school, we did end upgoing to this chiropractor that
helped a ton.
She was great.
She did that NET, it's like anemotional release technique.
And she also did cranial sacraltherapy, which was awesome.
So went to her.
And I also, I remember for alittle while I was having these
(10:25):
racing thoughts.
It felt like, you know, when youspeed up the, on an audible book
or whatever.
And it's two times the speed.
That's how it felt all the timefor like a few weeks.
I was experiencing that.
And my mom gave me B12 just likesublingual B12 and it totally
(10:47):
fixed it.
And again, I want to emphasizeI'm not a doctor.
I'm not a therapist.
This is just experiential, takeit or leave it.
Like definitely not givingadvice on this podcast.
So anyway, So the B12 really,really helped me with that
particular thing.
So that was really cool.
But the NET helped a ton andthere's lots of chiropractors
(11:08):
that do that.
And it's also there's N is it NE A T and I think that might be
slightly different.
I'm not sure.
But that's what I've seen aroundlately, and I haven't done that
modality in a long time.
But I was talking with a friendthe other day and she was
telling me she went to someonewho did, NAET, but that's an
allergy elimination.
And that was part of what theywould do with NET.
(11:29):
It was allergy elimination, butthey would also do like the
emotional component.
So, if you're looking for achiropractor.
That does the stuff just checkwith them and see what they
actually do with it because Ithink Some people delve into
different areas great forallergy elimination, too And
(11:50):
when you do that, they mightgive you a diet to go on They
might give you supplements for alittle while just to like it
kind of resets your system andgets things going operating the
way that they should beoperating.
So that really helped me.
So when I was a teenager, I justdidn't know what, I didn't know
(12:13):
what to, how to help myself.
It was just survival every day.
And so I didn't find as manythings that were super, super
helpful.
Then it was just like exposuretherapy where you're just like,
okay, I'm just going to go andI'm going to do it.
And.
That was just what I had to do.
But I remember looking at myhands a lot.
That would like, justinstinctively, if I got into
(12:35):
kind of a panic, I would justlook at my hands in class and
just focus on them and thatwould help me and I'd try to
breathe.
I realized that I would hold mybreath, which I think is really
typical.
for people.
But looking back, I'm like, Oh,I was instinctively bringing
myself back to the present bylooking at my hands.
(12:56):
And now we just, we're so muchmore aware now about all of
this.
You know, there are still say,notice five things you can see,
four things you can hear.
Three things you can feel.
Two things you can smell.
One thing you'd taste.
Something like that.
To just help you get in tunewith your senses and bring you
(13:18):
back to the present.
And I'm like, oh, I was totallyjust trying to get myself into
the present because it was, itwas rough.
So, anyway so that was highschool and like I said before, I
started going to thispractitioner a lot more when I
was about to go to college.
Cause I was kind of like, Idon't, I, I'm struggling.
(13:43):
Like if I have to driveanywhere, if I, you know, there
were just things that werereally difficult for me that
seemed really basic and andbeing away from home was that
was scary.
So anyway, I went to college.
It went really well, honestly.
I did have my siblings aroundand that was helpful and just to
(14:03):
feel safe.
And I mostly just, I mostly justtried things, baby steps, just
did what I felt comfortabledoing, but it was hard because I
really, I didn't really workthroughout college because I It
was too, I was so full ofanxiety, which is so sad, but it
(14:25):
was also hard to find a job inRexburg, Idaho.
So I was there for three yearsand I mostly just tried to do
like baby step things where I.
Could do the things that made menervous in a safe way.
And build up that confidence.
That was really, that's beenlike the main thing as far as
just getting over that on myown.
(14:48):
But I did pretty good my firstthree years of college.
So after my first three years, Itransferred schools and when I,
between the transfers, so Istarted college in 07 and then I
transferred in 2010.
So.
08 hit my family really hard,and we lost our house my dad
(15:11):
lost his job, it was really badfor like at least two years so I
ended up transferring schools in2010 ish, so I went home between
that time, I think I hadfinished up in the winter and
then I had, or like the end offall semester and then I had the
winter, where I spent that athome.
(15:34):
California, but we didn't have ahome anymore.
We, our house was gone.
So, I stayed with my parents.
They were, they had found aplace to rent and it was just a
very transitory time.
My mom was not doing great.
She was okay, but she wasn'tdoing amazing.
(15:55):
And Anyway, so it was a verystressful time and I don't know
if relapsed is the right word orwhat, but I just, I got into
this very dark place where itwas just super, super stressful
and full of anxiety and I wasoutside of my normal routine and
(16:17):
You know, you kind of getcomfortable, and then you feel
safe, and I everything was justup in the air.
Like, everything.
Looking back, and like, whoa.
I can see why this happened.
But, between our livingsituation, my mom's health, my
dad's job, me switching schools,you know, it was just a lot.
So, Anyway, so I just becamevery full of anxiety at this
(16:42):
time, and it was probably theworst that it had ever been.
There was a point where we livedby a bay, and it got really
foggy one time, like for a weekor two.
It was just dense, dense fog,and that really affected me,
like, we lived in the PacificNorthwest growing up and it
never bothered me.
As a child, you just don'treally.
(17:02):
The weather just doesn't botheryou as much and I don't feel
like I get seasonal depressionor anxiety terribly bad but this
situation just, this thick fogcame through where you just
couldn't see anything and itjust put me in this really dark,
dark place and I didn't know howto get out of it and I, I'm
(17:24):
pretty I'm a pretty groundedreasonable person, and I don't,
for as much as I've gotten intoall these alternative therapies,
it's taken me a long time towarm up to each one and make
sure that it's not wacky, youknow?
So and my mom was really openminded about stuff and just
would try all kinds of thingsand I was kind of like,
(17:46):
skeptical.
So at this point, I was in sucha bad place and even just
leaving the house, even with mymom, was difficult.
And so she recommended this bookand it's called the healing code
by Alexander Lloyd.
And that book was so helpful.
(18:07):
It's kind of a, it's a greatbeginner's guide to.
To energy healing.
And they, Just explain thingsreally, really well, especially
if you need kind of a scientificperspective.
Perspective.
So they mentioned the heart mathInstitute.
who.
They do these really coolstudies about the
(18:28):
electromagnetic fields aroundour heart.
And our brain.
And how that affects us and howthat affects the people.
Around us.
So.
I think we think of the brain asbeing the.
Kind of.
Electric.
Organ, you know, But the heart.
Is actually way more powerfulthan the brain, as far as that
(18:48):
goes.
So.
So the.
Electrical amplitude of yourheart is about 60 times greater
than the brain.
And.
The magnetic strength is ahundred times greater than the
brain.
And these.
Fields go out.
Six feet away from your body.
And this is something that canmeasure and.
(19:09):
And they've done all thesestudies about the emotions that.
You put out.
And how they effect.
Those around you and they'vedone other, I've heard other
kind of complimentary studies.
With other.
Organizations that talk abouthow.
How basically like the feelingsyou're putting out are gonna
they're kind of Contagious, youknow, So it's really, really
(19:33):
cool.
Cool.
I just really, I loved it cause.
It makes.
Makes it all make sense.
So.
Anyway.
So why.
Why does that matter?
So when you're.
When you're.
Aware.
Aware that you're putting out,like the emotions that you're
putting out are affecting.
Your body on an, on kind of anelectromagnetic level, like a
cellular level, and they'reaffecting the people around you.
(19:58):
It's really empowering and Sothis book kind of just teaches
you to harness that and.
Help yourself heal withintention and affirmations.
And so there's all these littleaffirmations in the back of the
book.
There's.
Kind of a list and there's awhole process.
You go through.
This is just really intentionaland.
Really helpful.
to.
(20:19):
It's really rewiring.
Your neural pathways is whatit's doing.
That's why affirmations.
Can be really helpful if you doit right.
So.
So anyway.
I used that book and it just, itreally, really.
It pulled me out, pulled me outof that space when.
(20:41):
When nothing else really.
Could.
And it's nice.
'cause I, you don't need to goto a practitioner.
It's just like something I coulddo.
At home every single day, beconsistent.
And help myself.
Change kind of from the insideout.
So highly, highly recommend thatbook..
I also went to my chiropractorat that time and she was able to
(21:04):
help a lot.
So, As I've gone forward in mylife and I transferred schools
and everything, everything wasokay.
Like once I got settled,everything was, was okay.
And I feel like I justprogressed by leaps and bounds
after that.
So thankfully, um, so I feellike shifting, if you can just
(21:29):
shift things.
And I knew I knew when I wasyounger, when I was in high
school, I was like, if I couldjust forget how this feels, I'd
be fine.
You know, it's like, it's all,it's kind of in your head and
it's kind of, you know, it's notrational.
But I remember my mom tellingme, and this really helped me
when I was younger.
(21:49):
In any given moment you're okay.
And it was like, Oh, you'reright.
I am okay.
Like technically I'm not goingto die.
No one's coming after me.
There's nothing really wrong.
I'm okay.
And just keeping that in mindwas a really helpful little
(22:09):
mantra, but going forward inlife, I, man, I just learned a
lot more about myself and.
I realized that I am reallyenergetically spiritually
sensitive.
I'm very empathic.
I'm very tuned into everyonearound me.
(22:30):
And that was a huge contributoras well.
I did not realize the feelingthat I was feeling.
It's very, this like you're upin your head kind of feeling.
And I learned more about thechakra system which is an
energetic system in your bodythat they, it's.
(22:51):
Something that's pretty widelyknown but I realized my energy
was up in my upper chakras allthe time, which sound like, what
does that even mean?
Right.
But it's a very like, heady,like, So you know, that dropping
feeling when you're on arollercoaster on a plane, when
(23:11):
the turbulence happens, it'sthat feeling.
It's that like, everything goesup.
And I was living in that feelingconstantly.
And so learning how to bring myenergy down, like breathing and
just imagining pullingeverything down to my root,
which is around like the base ofyour spine, like coccyx sacrum
(23:34):
area.
That has been a game changer forme.
So just understanding that I theupper chakras are, they're your
spiritual centers and theyconnect you to the divine.
And that's great.
But when you're constantly upthere, it's a little out of
body.
Like it's not ideal for livingin this world.
(23:57):
So learning how to ground myselfand bring that energy down and
just, Calm myself down has beenhuge.
And it's mostly just throughbreathing and visualization that
I do that.
But just also recognizing that Iam sensitive, I'm a highly
sensitive person, it has been sohelpful.
And I just hadn't really madethat connection that the two
(24:19):
were so related.
And that's why the moviesbothered me so much because they
are.
I was, it's, when I go to themovies, it's so immersive at the
screen, so big and it's blackand you're just sucked in to
this story that's going on.
(24:40):
And it was, it's really hard forme to separate my experience
from what's happening on thescreen.
So I would go to the movies andif we're watching.
A super stressful spy movie.
I just lived the life of a superstressed out spy or, I remember
watching the time traveler'swife and it, I just got out of
the theater and sobbed.
Cause I had just been throughlike, you know, the whiplash of
(25:05):
going through time, you know,it's just like, I, it just, it's
so hard for me to tune out ofthat and be like, okay, I'm just
me.
I'm an individual having my ownexperience and I'm observing
theirs.
I don't have to be.
a hundred percent feelingeverything that they're feeling
So it was just, it's just kinda,it's interesting.
(25:28):
So I still kind of struggle withthat a little bit.
Like IMAX theaters, I don't lovebut I do so much better now.
And it's, I have so many toolsthat help me, but so that along
with the healers blueprint isthe modality that I learned that
I talked about in the last.
In the last episode and that'sthe emotional release healing
(25:52):
modality.
That has helped me more thanjust about anything.
And it's helped me, learning ithas helped me understand myself
better.
And it, just knowing how torelease that, all the things
that aren't mine that I'mabsorbing, or the things that
are affecting me.
Just understanding how all ofthat works has helped me so, so
(26:13):
much.
But also, flying was a bigthing.
That's kind of one of the thingsthat like, was left over after,
you know, day to day doesn'tbother me anymore.
But, sometimes traveling orflying would really trigger me.
And I think it's just, it's theungrounded feeling again.
(26:34):
So, um, Learning how to groundmyself was huge for that.
But also I ended up doing somehypnotherapy for just flying.
I was going on a trip across thecountry that I wanted to enjoy.
And it was like, I'm not, I'mgonna, I'm not going to let
fear, you know, you just, whenyou live in this place of being
ruled by fear, it's just, itgets old and I was like, I'm
(26:57):
sick of this.
I'm going to go try somehypnotherapy.
And that was insanely effective.
I probably did two or threesessions with this woman and it
helped.
I did not realize I had a fearof heights as much as I did.
And once we got rid of that,that helped so much.
(27:19):
But the hypnotherapy, the wayshe explained it, she's like, it
just takes the charge out, takesthe charge at all these
experiences where you like, youhave this big reaction.
It just takes it out.
And it does.
It's really cool.
So it's so empowering to just,it's just, Realize that there
are these tools that can helpyou just take back your life And
(27:42):
you don't have to be ruled byfear and anxiety anymore.
Guys, it's so This is why Iwanted to share this.
I know I mean, you're here, youknow, you know we're going to be
talking about things that areoutside the box.
So I'm just sharing it all withyou and hopefully, hopefully it
helps.
But yeah, the hypnotherapy wasamazingly helpful.
(28:03):
And the lady I go to is she's inSpringville, Utah.
And she's, she does, she's alittle hippie.
She does like the crystals andstuff, which I'm fine with.
I like her approach.
I think it's great.
It's been helpful, but there'sso many different ways to do
hypnotherapy.
So find the one that works foryou if you want to try that.,
and another thing well, two morethings I'll talk on about this.
(28:30):
Being conscious of not makinganxiety, my identity was a big
thing for me.
That's one of the, it was kindof a double edged sword because
I, and part of this was fear Iwas afraid to talk about it
because I felt like it made itworse if I talked about it.
And that was kind of true, butalso not because the more I
(28:51):
could talk about it and face it,the more I can get help and
understand it and not let itcontrol me.
But I also didn't want, I didn'twant that to be my identifier.
I didn't want that to be like,Oh, Kristen has anxiety.
And that's who she is.
And I knew that from the time itstarted.
That I just, I didn't want thatto be who I was.
(29:13):
And I rejected it.
And, I think that was good.
But I've been really consciousabout that.
Like, I don't ever say I haveanxiety.
I don't have anxiety.
I experience it every now andthen.
But, That was a big thing forme, just making sure it's not my
identity and I'm not taking thatin.
(29:33):
And I also realized I realizedlike I would get, you kind of
get messaging or you get likevoices or not voices, like in a,
you know, psychotic way orsomething, but you, get messages
that are, being repeated in yourhead about you or what you're
(30:00):
experiencing that are nothelpful.
They're not, they don't comefrom light, you know, and
recognizing that I don't have toplay those in my head and kind
of calling it out and saying,Hmm, no, I'm going to send that
along its way and replace itwith what I do need.
And asking, this is where my,the spirituality comes in, like
(30:24):
asking God to send me.
angels and send the rightmessaging and think about what I
do need right now and justasking for calm and peace and
feelings of being in control andlike confidence and no big deal
and focusing on that is soempowering and it was so helpful
(30:49):
and it's been so helpful andanytime Any time that comes up,
I'm, I can call out the lies,and that is huge.
Recognizing that you can callout the lies that are coming up.
Is one of the most empoweringthings you can do for your
mental health, in my opinion.
So it, I just, I feel like now Ican recognize that that's not me
(31:10):
and that's not part of who I amand I can just call it out and
say, no, we're not going to playinto that because this is a
choice and I'm choosing to feelcalm and empowered and confident
in my life.
And I'm just not going to playthat game.
(31:31):
So those are kind of the thingsthat have helped me to feel
empowered about my mental healthand and really heal from any
anxiety that I felt and if youwant more information about any
of those modalities, I am happyto talk about it.
I, you can, if you see this onInstagram, send me a DM.
(31:52):
On my Sakalya Massage page.
You can also, I think if youwant to send me an email or
something, if you don't know me,just send me a text if you know
me.
If you don't know me, you cansend an email to Kristen, K R I
S T E N at sakalyamassage, S A KA L Y A.
(32:12):
M A S S A G E S,, er, G E, I'mnot good at spelling out loud,
dot com.
And, yeah, just send me amessage there if you want more
information or where to go.
Maybe I'll put some links in theshow notes or whatever.
But, just, happy to give you anyinformation that might be
(32:33):
helpful.
And Just wishing you the best onyour, on your journey through
healing.
As cheesy as that sounds, right?
But I just want you guys to, tosucceed and do well and know
that you can, you can overcomethe things that are weighing you
(32:54):
down.
There's, I feel like there'salmost always a solution.
There's always some kind ofsolution.
So I hope that you can take thatwith you today and the rest of
your week.
Thank you so much for listening.
If you are enjoying WhollyEmpowered, share it with that
friend or on your socials, youcan also hit the follow button
(33:16):
if you want to keep up with thelatest episodes.
Until next time, stay empowered.
I'm Kristen Russell, and this isThe Wholly Empowered Podcast,
where we dive into all thingsholistic healing and open our
minds, hearts, and paradigms tonew ideas so we can live our
most empowered, healthy, joyfullives.
This is episode two of WhollyEmpowered.
I'm Kristen Russell and I'll beyour host.
(00:23):
In this episode, I'm going to bediving deeper into my story and
I have a lot of, I have a lot ofthings that I've experienced
that contribute to why I havechosen more alternative
medicine, holistic paths withhow I handle my wellness.
(00:48):
I'm not going to.
Deep dive into all of them.
I'm going to give you a littleoverview of a few, but I think
the anxiety issue that I talkedabout in the last episode is
probably the most relevant andjust what I need to talk about
today.
So these episodes are a littlebit heavy, heavier, and I,
(01:08):
that's not my intention to haveit be that way all the time.
We're gonna have fun, and we'regonna laugh, and it's gonna be
great in the future.
But yeah, these ones are alittle bit more heavy, so bear
with me, but my main goal is togive you Just resources and the
things that helped me along theway.
(01:29):
And just as an overview forcontext about why I'm into all
these different, physical,spiritual, mental, emotional
health Things I feel like I'vehad some experience with just
about all of them.
I had a gut issue for like 12years and did everything did the
(01:51):
elimination diets and thesupplements and the probiotics
and just like researching whichones actually work best and
getting to know my body and whatit likes and what it doesn't
like and I eventually did somefrequency healing that actually
helped me a ton with that.
Grief has been a big thing forme.
That's been a big theme in mylife, just dealing with grief.
(02:13):
I struggled with my weight inhigh school a lot and that's
been a theme.
We've had a lot of mental healthissues in our family and just
things like that where it kindof hits you in the face and
you're like, Oh I want to figureout how to handle this in the
best way that I know how.
(02:33):
So for me, it's been a lot ofholistic.
Alternative methods just becauseof the way I.
I was raised one, my mom thatwas kind of her first.
Go.
To.
You know, let's try somethingnatural.
And.
That's worked out really wellfor me.
And I just, I feel very drawn tothings that feel.
(02:54):
I feel like they're in alignmentwith.
How our bodies work naturally.
And so.
That was kind of what I wasexposed to first.
And that's, what's justresonated as I've gone along
and.
You know, when that's the firstthing.
And.
It works then you don't reallyend up trying other things..
So.
I was young.
(03:15):
When this all started and my.
I think it wasn't the.
The norm for kids.
Kids to get on prescriptions foranxiety, as much as it is now
and not.
It just wasn't my mom.
She wasn't gonna go there unlessit was absolutely.
Necessary.
So.
That's just kind of how itnaturally went for.
Me and that's just continued on.
(03:36):
And so I've had all thesedifferent.
Things, all these, you know,Physical.
Mental emotional things come upand I've handled.
Then in a more natural way and.
And it's just kind.
Kind of been working out.
I've is there things I've.
Asked for.
For guidance on from my source.
And I feel like I've gotten.
(03:58):
Some answers that.
That have been.
Things have come up.
But I wouldn't have.
Necessarily chosen before.
Like.
Most of the time, I feel like Iget answers and I'm like
really?.
This thing, this thing came up,I'm looking into it.
It seems a.
(04:18):
A little weird, but I'm going totry it.
You know, it seems a little.
It seems a little out like.
Outside of my norm or it'ssomething that I have to kind
of.
Think outside the box for.
And.
When I've done that it's been,the reward has been really good.
You know, it's been.
(04:40):
A solution that.
As has just been the answer Iwas looking for.
So anyway, that's kind of whyI'm so passionate about all
these things.
I've just, just had someexperience.
(05:02):
So anyway, so that's just anoverview of my whole, I don't
want to give my whole healthhistory on all over the
internet.
Um, but I just, I've just dealtwith a lot of little things
throughout my life.
So anyway, but the anxiety, thatwas one that I feel like I've
(05:22):
actually been able to overcomeLike it doesn't really affect me
like it used to.
And I think we all get anxiety.
Like I think it gets overpathologized sometimes.
It's like everyone experiencesanxiety.
That's perfectly normal humanexperience.
Right.
So yeah.
So I definitely still experienceanxiety.
(05:44):
But it's not anything like itwas.
So Just to give you kind of somebackground, we lived in the
Pacific Northwest growing up.
It was beautiful.
I would ride my bike around likeevery day we were homeschooled.
It was idyllic.
My childhood was just reallygreat.
And once we moved to Californiawhen I was 14, that's when
(06:06):
things just got hard.
Life just got hard after thatfor many reasons, just kind of
one thing after the other, but.
So my mom got sick when I was12, which was Washington still,
but then we moved and then Ijust developed this really
intense anxiety at about 15, Ithink is when it probably
(06:26):
started.
It was my sophomore year of highschool.
That year was just a living hellfor me.
It was horrible.
I was just in this constantstate of fight or flight.
And I'm going to go over, uh,some of the symptoms that I had.
And so I don't know if a triggerwarning is appropriate.
I kind of have mixed feelingsabout those, but just so you
(06:49):
know, I'm going to go over somesymptoms that I, that I
experienced just mainly, becauseI want people to know if you're
experiencing this too, You'renot the only one.
I, maybe it's a common thing asa teenager to think you're the
only one experiencing things,but I just felt like such a like
anomaly, It's like no oneunderstands what I'm going
(07:11):
through and it made it so hardto talk about it and so I think
it's important to just sharewhat we experience because it
helps other people know thatthey're not alone so anyway, I'm
just gonna go over some thingsYou that I experienced, kind of
the triggers for me for thisanxiety and some of the things
that were going on in my mindand body.
(07:33):
So if you haven't listened toepisode one, that'll give you
some more context.
I don't feel like I need to goback over it all, but
essentially I just developedthis anxiety.
Anytime I had to go to school, Iwas in this kind of out of body
fight or flight.
Thing, especially that wholeyear.
(07:53):
It was really scary.
Anytime I would travel,especially if it wasn't with my
family, but even sometimes withmy family, like it was so
pervasive, this feeling, and IIt was kind of like the
situational claustrophobia.
That's like the best way I canput it, where If I felt like I
(08:14):
was stuck anywhere and in asituation where I couldn't
leave, like at school, I wasenough of a people pleaser.
I didn't want to, upset anyoneor get in trouble.
And school was so, I had beenhomeschooled before this.
And so I moved to a new state,which was like culture shock.
And then we moved to, you know,and then I started going to
(08:36):
public school, which was crazy.
I had been used to being treatedlike an adult.
By the adults around me, tons ofrespect.
They trusted me.
And then you go to public schooland you're an inmate, you know,
like they treat you like you aresuspect all the time.
And I was just like, I don'tdeserve this anyway.
So that was really shocking forme and really hard adjustment.
(08:59):
So it was really hard for me tosit in these classrooms and feel
like I couldn't leave and I hadto ask even to go to the
bathroom and it's a big to doand that was really stressful
for me and it kind of just cameout in this like, you know,
school was just such a trigger.
So, yeah, anywhere that I feltlike I was stuck.
(09:21):
So, planes, you know, cars,there were so many, so many
things, but just basically if Ifelt like I was out of control,
like if I felt like I didn'thave control of myself, and
where I was, and what I wasexperiencing, it really
triggered me.
And the movies.
Guys, the movies.
(09:42):
My mom loved the movies.
She always wanted to go.
It was her escape.
And I, I, she always be like, goto the movies with me.
And I was like, because I loveyou, I will go to the movies
with you.
And that just puzzled her somuch.
But, I'll go into that morelater, but the movies were a
huge trigger.
(10:02):
Anyway, so some of the thingsthat helped me.
So in high school, we did end upgoing to this chiropractor that
helped a ton.
She was great.
She did that NET, it's like anemotional release technique.
And she also did cranial sacraltherapy, which was awesome.
So went to her.
And I also, I remember for alittle while I was having these
(10:25):
racing thoughts.
It felt like, you know, when youspeed up the, on an audible book
or whatever.
And it's two times the speed.
That's how it felt all the timefor like a few weeks.
I was experiencing that.
And my mom gave me B12 just likesublingual B12 and it totally
(10:47):
fixed it.
And again, I want to emphasizeI'm not a doctor.
I'm not a therapist.
This is just experiential, takeit or leave it.
Like definitely not givingadvice on this podcast.
So anyway, So the B12 really,really helped me with that
particular thing.
So that was really cool.
But the NET helped a ton andthere's lots of chiropractors
(11:08):
that do that.
And it's also there's N is it NE A T and I think that might be
slightly different.
I'm not sure.
But that's what I've seen aroundlately, and I haven't done that
modality in a long time.
But I was talking with a friendthe other day and she was
telling me she went to someonewho did, NAET, but that's an
allergy elimination.
And that was part of what theywould do with NET.
(11:29):
It was allergy elimination, butthey would also do like the
emotional component.
So, if you're looking for achiropractor.
That does the stuff just checkwith them and see what they
actually do with it because Ithink Some people delve into
different areas great forallergy elimination, too And
(11:50):
when you do that, they mightgive you a diet to go on They
might give you supplements for alittle while just to like it
kind of resets your system andgets things going operating the
way that they should beoperating.
So that really helped me.
So when I was a teenager, I justdidn't know what, I didn't know
(12:13):
what to, how to help myself.
It was just survival every day.
And so I didn't find as manythings that were super, super
helpful.
Then it was just like exposuretherapy where you're just like,
okay, I'm just going to go andI'm going to do it.
And.
That was just what I had to do.
But I remember looking at myhands a lot.
That would like, justinstinctively, if I got into
(12:35):
kind of a panic, I would justlook at my hands in class and
just focus on them and thatwould help me and I'd try to
breathe.
I realized that I would hold mybreath, which I think is really
typical.
for people.
But looking back, I'm like, Oh,I was instinctively bringing
myself back to the present bylooking at my hands.
(12:56):
And now we just, we're so muchmore aware now about all of
this.
You know, there are still say,notice five things you can see,
four things you can hear.
Three things you can feel.
Two things you can smell.
One thing you'd taste.
Something like that.
To just help you get in tunewith your senses and bring you
(13:18):
back to the present.
And I'm like, oh, I was totallyjust trying to get myself into
the present because it was, itwas rough.
So, anyway so that was highschool and like I said before, I
started going to thispractitioner a lot more when I
was about to go to college.
Cause I was kind of like, Idon't, I, I'm struggling.
(13:43):
Like if I have to driveanywhere, if I, you know, there
were just things that werereally difficult for me that
seemed really basic and andbeing away from home was that
was scary.
So anyway, I went to college.
It went really well, honestly.
I did have my siblings aroundand that was helpful and just to
(14:03):
feel safe.
And I mostly just, I mostly justtried things, baby steps, just
did what I felt comfortabledoing, but it was hard because I
really, I didn't really workthroughout college because I It
was too, I was so full ofanxiety, which is so sad, but it
(14:25):
was also hard to find a job inRexburg, Idaho.
So I was there for three yearsand I mostly just tried to do
like baby step things where I.
Could do the things that made menervous in a safe way.
And build up that confidence.
That was really, that's beenlike the main thing as far as
just getting over that on myown.
(14:48):
But I did pretty good my firstthree years of college.
So after my first three years, Itransferred schools and when I,
between the transfers, so Istarted college in 07 and then I
transferred in 2010.
So.
08 hit my family really hard,and we lost our house my dad
(15:11):
lost his job, it was really badfor like at least two years so I
ended up transferring schools in2010 ish, so I went home between
that time, I think I hadfinished up in the winter and
then I had, or like the end offall semester and then I had the
winter, where I spent that athome.
(15:34):
California, but we didn't have ahome anymore.
We, our house was gone.
So, I stayed with my parents.
They were, they had found aplace to rent and it was just a
very transitory time.
My mom was not doing great.
She was okay, but she wasn'tdoing amazing.
(15:55):
And Anyway, so it was a verystressful time and I don't know
if relapsed is the right word orwhat, but I just, I got into
this very dark place where itwas just super, super stressful
and full of anxiety and I wasoutside of my normal routine and
(16:17):
You know, you kind of getcomfortable, and then you feel
safe, and I everything was justup in the air.
Like, everything.
Looking back, and like, whoa.
I can see why this happened.
But, between our livingsituation, my mom's health, my
dad's job, me switching schools,you know, it was just a lot.
So, Anyway, so I just becamevery full of anxiety at this
(16:42):
time, and it was probably theworst that it had ever been.
There was a point where we livedby a bay, and it got really
foggy one time, like for a weekor two.
It was just dense, dense fog,and that really affected me,
like, we lived in the PacificNorthwest growing up and it
never bothered me.
As a child, you just don'treally.
(17:02):
The weather just doesn't botheryou as much and I don't feel
like I get seasonal depressionor anxiety terribly bad but this
situation just, this thick fogcame through where you just
couldn't see anything and itjust put me in this really dark,
dark place and I didn't know howto get out of it and I, I'm
(17:24):
pretty I'm a pretty groundedreasonable person, and I don't,
for as much as I've gotten intoall these alternative therapies,
it's taken me a long time towarm up to each one and make
sure that it's not wacky, youknow?
So and my mom was really openminded about stuff and just
would try all kinds of thingsand I was kind of like,
(17:46):
skeptical.
So at this point, I was in sucha bad place and even just
leaving the house, even with mymom, was difficult.
And so she recommended this bookand it's called the healing code
by Alexander Lloyd.
And that book was so helpful.
(18:07):
It's kind of a, it's a greatbeginner's guide to.
To energy healing.
And they, Just explain thingsreally, really well, especially
if you need kind of a scientificperspective.
Perspective.
So they mentioned the heart mathInstitute.
who.
They do these really coolstudies about the
(18:28):
electromagnetic fields aroundour heart.
And our brain.
And how that affects us and howthat affects the people.
Around us.
So.
I think we think of the brain asbeing the.
Kind of.
Electric.
Organ, you know, But the heart.
Is actually way more powerfulthan the brain, as far as that
(18:48):
goes.
So.
So the.
Electrical amplitude of yourheart is about 60 times greater
than the brain.
And.
The magnetic strength is ahundred times greater than the
brain.
And these.
Fields go out.
Six feet away from your body.
And this is something that canmeasure and.
(19:09):
And they've done all thesestudies about the emotions that.
You put out.
And how they effect.
Those around you and they'vedone other, I've heard other
kind of complimentary studies.
With other.
Organizations that talk abouthow.
How basically like the feelingsyou're putting out are gonna
they're kind of Contagious, youknow, So it's really, really
(19:33):
cool.
Cool.
I just really, I loved it cause.
It makes.
Makes it all make sense.
So.
Anyway.
So why.
Why does that matter?
So when you're.
When you're.
Aware.
Aware that you're putting out,like the emotions that you're
putting out are affecting.
Your body on an, on kind of anelectromagnetic level, like a
cellular level, and they'reaffecting the people around you.
(19:58):
It's really empowering and Sothis book kind of just teaches
you to harness that and.
Help yourself heal withintention and affirmations.
And so there's all these littleaffirmations in the back of the
book.
There's.
Kind of a list and there's awhole process.
You go through.
This is just really intentionaland.
Really helpful.
to.
(20:19):
It's really rewiring.
Your neural pathways is whatit's doing.
That's why affirmations.
Can be really helpful if you doit right.
So.
So anyway.
I used that book and it just, itreally, really.
It pulled me out, pulled me outof that space when.
(20:41):
When nothing else really.
Could.
And it's nice.
'cause I, you don't need to goto a practitioner.
It's just like something I coulddo.
At home every single day, beconsistent.
And help myself.
Change kind of from the insideout.
So highly, highly recommend thatbook..
I also went to my chiropractorat that time and she was able to
(21:04):
help a lot.
So, As I've gone forward in mylife and I transferred schools
and everything, everything wasokay.
Like once I got settled,everything was, was okay.
And I feel like I justprogressed by leaps and bounds
after that.
So thankfully, um, so I feellike shifting, if you can just
(21:29):
shift things.
And I knew I knew when I wasyounger, when I was in high
school, I was like, if I couldjust forget how this feels, I'd
be fine.
You know, it's like, it's all,it's kind of in your head and
it's kind of, you know, it's notrational.
But I remember my mom tellingme, and this really helped me
when I was younger.
(21:49):
In any given moment you're okay.
And it was like, Oh, you'reright.
I am okay.
Like technically I'm not goingto die.
No one's coming after me.
There's nothing really wrong.
I'm okay.
And just keeping that in mindwas a really helpful little
(22:09):
mantra, but going forward inlife, I, man, I just learned a
lot more about myself and.
I realized that I am reallyenergetically spiritually
sensitive.
I'm very empathic.
I'm very tuned into everyonearound me.
(22:30):
And that was a huge contributoras well.
I did not realize the feelingthat I was feeling.
It's very, this like you're upin your head kind of feeling.
And I learned more about thechakra system which is an
energetic system in your bodythat they, it's.
(22:51):
Something that's pretty widelyknown but I realized my energy
was up in my upper chakras allthe time, which sound like, what
does that even mean?
Right.
But it's a very like, heady,like, So you know, that dropping
feeling when you're on arollercoaster on a plane, when
(23:11):
the turbulence happens, it'sthat feeling.
It's that like, everything goesup.
And I was living in that feelingconstantly.
And so learning how to bring myenergy down, like breathing and
just imagining pullingeverything down to my root,
which is around like the base ofyour spine, like coccyx sacrum
(23:34):
area.
That has been a game changer forme.
So just understanding that I theupper chakras are, they're your
spiritual centers and theyconnect you to the divine.
And that's great.
But when you're constantly upthere, it's a little out of
body.
Like it's not ideal for livingin this world.
(23:57):
So learning how to ground myselfand bring that energy down and
just, Calm myself down has beenhuge.
And it's mostly just throughbreathing and visualization that
I do that.
But just also recognizing that Iam sensitive, I'm a highly
sensitive person, it has been sohelpful.
And I just hadn't really madethat connection that the two
(24:19):
were so related.
And that's why the moviesbothered me so much because they
are.
I was, it's, when I go to themovies, it's so immersive at the
screen, so big and it's blackand you're just sucked in to
this story that's going on.
(24:40):
And it was, it's really hard forme to separate my experience
from what's happening on thescreen.
So I would go to the movies andif we're watching.
A super stressful spy movie.
I just lived the life of a superstressed out spy or, I remember
watching the time traveler'swife and it, I just got out of
the theater and sobbed.
Cause I had just been throughlike, you know, the whiplash of
(25:05):
going through time, you know,it's just like, I, it just, it's
so hard for me to tune out ofthat and be like, okay, I'm just
me.
I'm an individual having my ownexperience and I'm observing
theirs.
I don't have to be.
a hundred percent feelingeverything that they're feeling
So it was just, it's just kinda,it's interesting.
(25:28):
So I still kind of struggle withthat a little bit.
Like IMAX theaters, I don't lovebut I do so much better now.
And it's, I have so many toolsthat help me, but so that along
with the healers blueprint isthe modality that I learned that
I talked about in the last.
In the last episode and that'sthe emotional release healing
(25:52):
modality.
That has helped me more thanjust about anything.
And it's helped me, learning ithas helped me understand myself
better.
And it, just knowing how torelease that, all the things
that aren't mine that I'mabsorbing, or the things that
are affecting me.
Just understanding how all ofthat works has helped me so, so
(26:13):
much.
But also, flying was a bigthing.
That's kind of one of the thingsthat like, was left over after,
you know, day to day doesn'tbother me anymore.
But, sometimes traveling orflying would really trigger me.
And I think it's just, it's theungrounded feeling again.
(26:34):
So, um, Learning how to groundmyself was huge for that.
But also I ended up doing somehypnotherapy for just flying.
I was going on a trip across thecountry that I wanted to enjoy.
And it was like, I'm not, I'mgonna, I'm not going to let
fear, you know, you just, whenyou live in this place of being
ruled by fear, it's just, itgets old and I was like, I'm
(26:57):
sick of this.
I'm going to go try somehypnotherapy.
And that was insanely effective.
I probably did two or threesessions with this woman and it
helped.
I did not realize I had a fearof heights as much as I did.
And once we got rid of that,that helped so much.
(27:19):
But the hypnotherapy, the wayshe explained it, she's like, it
just takes the charge out, takesthe charge at all these
experiences where you like, youhave this big reaction.
It just takes it out.
And it does.
It's really cool.
So it's so empowering to just,it's just, Realize that there
are these tools that can helpyou just take back your life And
(27:42):
you don't have to be ruled byfear and anxiety anymore.
Guys, it's so This is why Iwanted to share this.
I know I mean, you're here, youknow, you know we're going to be
talking about things that areoutside the box.
So I'm just sharing it all withyou and hopefully, hopefully it
helps.
But yeah, the hypnotherapy wasamazingly helpful.
(28:03):
And the lady I go to is she's inSpringville, Utah.
And she's, she does, she's alittle hippie.
She does like the crystals andstuff, which I'm fine with.
I like her approach.
I think it's great.
It's been helpful, but there'sso many different ways to do
hypnotherapy.
So find the one that works foryou if you want to try that.,
and another thing well, two morethings I'll talk on about this.
(28:30):
Being conscious of not makinganxiety, my identity was a big
thing for me.
That's one of the, it was kindof a double edged sword because
I, and part of this was fear Iwas afraid to talk about it
because I felt like it made itworse if I talked about it.
And that was kind of true, butalso not because the more I
(28:51):
could talk about it and face it,the more I can get help and
understand it and not let itcontrol me.
But I also didn't want, I didn'twant that to be my identifier.
I didn't want that to be like,Oh, Kristen has anxiety.
And that's who she is.
And I knew that from the time itstarted.
That I just, I didn't want thatto be who I was.
(29:13):
And I rejected it.
And, I think that was good.
But I've been really consciousabout that.
Like, I don't ever say I haveanxiety.
I don't have anxiety.
I experience it every now andthen.
But, That was a big thing forme, just making sure it's not my
identity and I'm not taking thatin.
(29:33):
And I also realized I realizedlike I would get, you kind of
get messaging or you get likevoices or not voices, like in a,
you know, psychotic way orsomething, but you, get messages
that are, being repeated in yourhead about you or what you're
(30:00):
experiencing that are nothelpful.
They're not, they don't comefrom light, you know, and
recognizing that I don't have toplay those in my head and kind
of calling it out and saying,Hmm, no, I'm going to send that
along its way and replace itwith what I do need.
And asking, this is where my,the spirituality comes in, like
(30:24):
asking God to send me.
angels and send the rightmessaging and think about what I
do need right now and justasking for calm and peace and
feelings of being in control andlike confidence and no big deal
and focusing on that is soempowering and it was so helpful
(30:49):
and it's been so helpful andanytime Any time that comes up,
I'm, I can call out the lies,and that is huge.
Recognizing that you can callout the lies that are coming up.
Is one of the most empoweringthings you can do for your
mental health, in my opinion.
So it, I just, I feel like now Ican recognize that that's not me
(31:10):
and that's not part of who I amand I can just call it out and
say, no, we're not going to playinto that because this is a
choice and I'm choosing to feelcalm and empowered and confident
in my life.
And I'm just not going to playthat game.
(31:31):
So those are kind of the thingsthat have helped me to feel
empowered about my mental healthand and really heal from any
anxiety that I felt and if youwant more information about any
of those modalities, I am happyto talk about it.
I, you can, if you see this onInstagram, send me a DM.
(31:52):
On my Sakalya Massage page.
You can also, I think if youwant to send me an email or
something, if you don't know me,just send me a text if you know
me.
If you don't know me, you cansend an email to Kristen, K R I
S T E N at sakalyamassage, S A KA L Y A.
(32:12):
M A S S A G E S,, er, G E, I'mnot good at spelling out loud,
dot com.
And, yeah, just send me amessage there if you want more
information or where to go.
Maybe I'll put some links in theshow notes or whatever.
But, just, happy to give you anyinformation that might be
(32:33):
helpful.
And Just wishing you the best onyour, on your journey through
healing.
As cheesy as that sounds, right?
But I just want you guys to, tosucceed and do well and know
that you can, you can overcomethe things that are weighing you
(32:54):
down.
There's, I feel like there'salmost always a solution.
There's always some kind ofsolution.
So I hope that you can take thatwith you today and the rest of
your week.
Thank you so much for listening.
If you are enjoying WhollyEmpowered, share it with that
friend or on your socials, youcan also hit the follow button
(33:16):
if you want to keep up with thelatest episodes.
Until next time, stay empowered.
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