March 31, 2025 • 65 mins
In this episode, Matt O'Neill, author of The Good Mood Revolution, shares his powerful five-step journal process to transform negative thoughts and set the tone for a positive day. He opens up about his personal journey of overcoming feelings of unworthiness and addiction, revealing how understanding the eight categories of negative thoughts can lead to profound healing. Matt also explores the role of forgiveness, highlighting how shifting our mindset can unlock greater happiness and personal growth.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
is, I write down three things.
I win at Three things from theday before that were wins, and
usually I end up with four orfive.
You know, and I'm not you know,but some days I've struggled to
come up with three things thatI did well the day before.
But this is a really powerfulprocess because again it goes
(00:24):
back to that guilt, this um, I'mnot, I'm not doing enough, I'm
not good enough.
Once we start to and that'scoming from a powerful place too
because our mind is like domore, do more, do more, It'll be
helpful for you, You'll survivemore, You'll stack more money
and then, if anything happens,you'll have money and you can
pay for it and you'll be okay.
So it's not trying to hurt us.
(00:45):
What it does is it always themind's always looking at what
are we not doing right so we canfix it, because it needs to be
fixed what it doesn't do.
This is super crazy man.
It doesn't tell us what isgoing well unless we ask it.
And we and we have to ask itwhat is going well?
Consciously, Because if it'sgoing well like, go back to us
(01:10):
living in tribes in the SavannahIf it was going well, we didn't
need to spend energy on it,because it took all of our
energy to go, get food andsurvive and not do things wrong
or not get kicked out of thetribe or not say the wrong thing
.
So the brain only spent itsenergy on what wasn't going well
, because if it was going well,great, you got that covered, I
don't need energy on it.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Welcome to the Wednesday podcast, a weekly
resource thoughtfully crafted tohelp people build and refine
discipline, accomplish theirgoals, fortify their mindsets
and be of service to somebody inthis world.
My name is Ryan Cass and I ammindsets and be of service to
somebody in this world.
My name is Ryan Cass and I amyour host, and it is my mission
and commitment to deliveramazing episodes to you every
week where you'll learn frommyself or a renowned expert in
(01:57):
their field.
We love helping people win inevery aspect of their lives, and
you can help us win by sharingthe show with somebody that you
believe will benefit from it,subscribing and leaving a rating
and review.
We believe that everybody inthis world is meant to do
something great with their lives, and we're here to help play a
(02:17):
role in that.
Thank you for tuning in andlet's win today.
First foot on the floor, I saythank.
Then, as my other foot hits thefloor, I say you.
With each successive step, Iquietly repeat thank you, thank
(02:38):
you, thank you.
If you repeat the words thankyou to start each day,
especially on the mornings whenyou don't feel like it, you too
will strengthen your gratitude.
There is a very good reason todo this.
Gratitude is the gateway to goodmoods.
It's not always possible to gofrom a bad mood to immediately
feeling happy, but it ispossible to go from a bad mood
(03:01):
to feeling grateful for beingalive.
Then, once you are grateful,you can shift back into a good
mood, to feeling grateful forbeing alive.
Then, once you are grateful,you can shift back into a good
mood.
We've got someone that I'mincredibly grateful for, and
that is my friend and brother,matt O'Neill, who is the author
of the Good Mood Revolution book, which we just heard from the
(03:21):
host of the Good Mood Revolutionpodcast, ceo of Matt O'Neill
Real Estate but, moreimportantly, someone who is an
incredible family man that isigniting happiness in the lives
of countless people around theworld.
Matt, welcome my friend.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
What's up, ryan Dude?
I am so thrilled to be on thispodcast so we said some cool
things about you.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
You've done some amazing things in your life and
now, with your most recentsuccess, you've got the good
mood revolution book.
A lot of amazing things inthere that we can read about you
.
But let's dig into Matt alittle bit first.
What do you say is somethingthat we wouldn't be able to find
(04:12):
on your resume that makes youreally proud, and why?
Speaker 1 (04:21):
What makes me really proud?
That's not on my resume.
Hmm, what makes me really proud?
That's not on my resume.
You know I was at the I LoveCoaching event that Adam Roach
puts on and John Maxwell wasspeaking and John said I want to
be admired most by the peoplewho know me best.
(04:43):
And, man, I'm proud to say thatthat's my number one goal, that
it's great to make a positiveimpact in the lives of people.
I don't know.
I was actually reading thereviews on my book just this
week and I came to tears aboutpeople saying how their lives
had transformed just reading thebook and that's great.
But I want to make a biggerimpact in my children's lives
(05:08):
and in my wife's life and Ireally want to pour into those
relationships.
And that's something that noteverybody gets to see and that's
also why it can get pushed tothe side, but it's a huge focus
of mine to be the biggest heroto the people who know me best.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
If you weren't in the room and you were the topic of
conversation, what would youwish and hope that the people
that are most meaningful to youwould have to say about you and
the impact that you have intheir lives?
Speaker 1 (05:44):
That I care, that I care about them and that I would
stop anything to help them.
And for me, that's the mostimportant thing is that we are
all busy.
You're super busy.
You got a lot of things goingon.
I've got a lot of things goingon and I really want to
(06:05):
prioritize these relationships,and this isn't always the
easiest thing.
So this morning, um well, lastnight, my mom said okay, hey,
you're going to take me to havemy car fixed, right?
And I said, yeah, we're goingto go.
She said it's tomorrow morning.
I'm like, oh, tomorrow morning,yep, we're going to go.
(06:29):
This is the third or fourthtime that she's reminded me that
I'm going to take her to gether car.
You know, just like, follow herto the dealership and and bring
her home.
And she said, well, they openat eight.
I said, oh, perfect, well, youknow, I'm on Friday mornings
it's just me and the kids.
I let Katie have her space andI take care of the kids on
Friday.
I said I've got the kids, I'mgoing to get them ready, I'll
drive them to school and thenI'll go get my workout done and
I'll be at your place around8.30, 8.45.
(06:51):
And she goes oh yeah, I wasreally hoping it was going to be
eight.
When they opened I was like well, I mean, it could probably just
be 8.45,.
Right, it's a car dealership.
They take cars at any time inthe morning.
And then my wife says you knowwhat?
I'll take your mom, I'll takeher, and then you get your
(07:15):
workout in.
I know, you got a busy daytomorrow.
I was like okay, and then, as Iwas about to go to bed that
night this was last night I saidKatie, I'm going to take my mom
.
And I sent her a text.
I said hey, I committed to youthat I was going to take you.
Here's what I'll do I'll dropthe kids at school and then I'll
come to your house at 730 andyou and I can sit and have
(07:35):
coffee for 30 minutes and thenwe'll go and be there right on
time at eight o'clock and I'llfind a different time to get the
workout in.
And that's what I did.
And so this is like it's notthe easiest decision all the
time because we've got thesecompeting priorities, but it is
(07:55):
a big focus of mine to put mypriority number one.
I write this all the time Oneof my top three life goals is
actually the first life goal Iwrite down Weekly in my journal.
I have three life goals on myweekly section and the first one
I write down is relationshipsare my number one priority.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
I love that.
That's amazing, and Iappreciate that you put that
into action and that one thingyou mentioned is that holding
your word is extremely important, and there's much mention of
integrity and being your word inGood Mood Revolution, so it's
(08:41):
refreshing to hear that.
It's inspiring to hear, rather.
So it's refreshing to hear thatit's inspiring to hear, rather,
that you're being a steward ofyour word and the teachings of
Good Mood Revolution.
Matt, one thing that our goodfriend, chris Singleton said
that I often think about andshare when I'm telling stories
(09:02):
about why I do what I do is thateverybody has a story behind a
stance and, of all the ways thatwe can serve people in this
world, there's countless ways wecan serve people in this world.
Whether it's through mindsetcoaching, whether it's through
home services, everyone's gotsomething that really drives
(09:23):
them to do what they do.
What's the story behind thestance for choosing to focus on
igniting the good moodrevolution, and what was it in
your life that ultimately servedas the catalyst for going down
(09:43):
this journey and impacting livesin the way that you do today?
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Every single role model can be such a blessing.
Even the ones that are at thetime don't seem like it.
And so for me, my dad wassomebody that I had a lot of
challenges with and he was areally tough dad to be raised by
.
And then he left our familywhen I was five and he didn't
(10:16):
want anything to do with me andhe wasn't somebody that upheld
his end of the bargain.
He didn't keep his promises, hewasn't there for his four
children, and it washeartbreaking and it had me
think that I wasn't worthy ofhis love and that actually I
wasn't worthy of God's love.
That was a big one for me.
(10:36):
I'm like man, I'm just five,you know, I'm a five-year-old
kid, but I'm like, what's wrongwith me?
Why did God not love me enoughto give me a dad that would be
there and protect me?
And I couldn't reconcile it, Icouldn't figure it out, you know
, again, I was just a kid, andso then I got into a bunch of
bad moods and, as I grew older,that kind of thought that I'm
(10:58):
unlovable, there's somethingwrong with me, that kind of
festered, and I wanted to provethat I was lovable.
So I tried as much as I couldto accomplish.
I'm like, oh, if I just peoplelike me when I'm doing well and
they like put me up on apedestal and say, like look at
how well he did.
So I'll just keep accomplishingand accomplishing.
But I still felt really bad andthen it turned into a bunch of
(11:22):
addiction and through addictionI started to be really
destructive and it wasself-destruction.
And this is kind of whataddiction always is.
Addiction is an attempt to feelgood, which is admirable.
I wanted to feel good.
I didn't know how I'm takingthe easy road to feel good, but
ultimately it's because there'ssomething wrong.
And then one day it just cameto me through the grace of God.
(11:48):
My cousin said, hey, you shouldwatch this movie, the movie the
Secret.
And I saw the Secret by RhondaByrne, I was 25.
And she said everything in yourlife is created by your
thoughts and emotions.
All the good in your life iscreated by your positive
thoughts and emotions, and allthe bad in your life is created
(12:09):
by your negative thoughts andemotions.
You know, it's the law ofattraction.
And I was like I had neverheard it.
I didn't know what was going onand it just blew my mind.
And so I went on a quest tofigure out how can I stop having
these negative thoughts andemotions and how can I create
really positive thoughts andemotions.
And the law you know she callsit the law of attraction.
(12:33):
It's not in my book I talkabout.
This is level six of 16.
But, man, when you come fromwhere I came from, which was
level one, I'm not worthy oflove.
Level six, which is, hey, youcan manifest the life you want,
it feels amazing.
And so I dove super hard intothat.
(12:53):
And then it turned into just anobsession with trying to help
other people, including myself,live happier and happier and
happier and heal all the painthat had been passed down to us
or that we had decided when wewere little kids, because it's
not necessary, we don't have tosuffer like that.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
As you were explaining that, it brought me
back to my early years, and wehad a similar conversation
recently on your podcast aboutwhat's the genesis for why we do
what we do, and what you and Ishare in common is that both of
(13:33):
our fathers have struggled and,in many ways, unintentionally
also served as our greatestteacher In that.
In those moments, moments isn'tthat cool, you know, and that's
one thing to extract from thatis that even the people that we
(13:55):
encounter in our lives that mayhurt us or that may we may
perceive more negativeexperiences, there is positive
that can be extracted, and thesepeople can still teach us and
give us something that is goingto serve us for decades to come.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
And that's what I heard.
That's the impact that I heardthat your father Walsh, and he
was the author of a book calledConversations with God.
That was a really big seller inthe late 90s and early 2000s.
But he wrote this littlechildren's book and I bought it
and read it to my kids.
But it had more impact on methan the kids.
(15:00):
And the story is there's alittle soul up in heaven and's
talking to God and he's like God, what am I?
And God said you're the light.
You're all that's good in theworld.
You are love and joy and peaceand fun and creativity.
He's like you are just thelight of the world.
And the soul's like what's thelight?
(15:22):
And God said oh, that's right,you can't see it because you're
surrounded by all that is goodhere in heaven.
You're like a candle.
That's this beautiful, brightlight.
But you're sitting on thesurface of the sun and so you
can't even see yourself.
And the soul says well, how canI know myself?
How can I see myself as thelight?
(15:43):
How could I figure out what Iam?
And God's like well, to do thatyou'd have to go into the
darkness.
And the little soul said well,that sounds interesting.
And God's like yeah, I mean,it's not going to be easy, but
if you really want to knowyourself as the light, that's
what you got to do.
And he said, okay, well, let'sdo it.
(16:04):
And God said, well, you shouldprobably work on something while
you're doing this.
Is there any kind of qualityyou want to grow in yourself
that you want to learn about?
And he thought about it for awhile and he said you know, I'd
like to work on forgiveness.
And God's like oh, it's a greatone, good choice.
(16:28):
He said well, go get one ofyour friends and see if one of
your friends will help you learnthis quality of forgiveness.
And so he goes and he grabs abuddy.
He's like hey, man, will youhelp me with, with forgiveness?
And his buddy's like oh, I loveyou a lot, man, that's a tough
one, but I'll do it.
And his friend starts to put onthese dark cloaks and he
becomes, starts to look sadderand sadder and sadder.
And little soul's like like,what are you doing?
He's like I'm helping you.
And god says, all right, areyou guys ready?
(16:48):
And they're like we're ready.
And then he sends them bothdown into the darkness of earth.
One is the father and one isthe little boy wow, wow, I never
knew that story.
Did you.
It's powerful man and it startsto have.
(17:09):
You see that all these peoplewe think were hard for us may
have actually been buddies thatwere just playing a role to help
our development.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
What did forgiveness look like to your father?
Yeah, man.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
I was at a tony robbins date with destiny event
and, uh, he took us, he, he didthis meditation and it's, you
know, there's like 10 000 peoplethere and so when a whole group
of people is in a meditationlike that, there's an energy to
it and there's, there was justthis energy in the room and he's
like, and he's asking me aboutmy earliest memory.
(17:49):
And so I'm in this meditation,I'm going back to my earliest
memory and I picture myself atDisney World.
My brother was taking me on theteacups and we were playing on
a Dumbo's ears and I was likethree years old.
That was my earliest memory.
It's the memory I always wentto when people said what's your
earliest memory?
And then he said, no, there's amemory earlier than that.
(18:10):
And then, bam, my consciousnesswas just flooded with earlier
memories and I started to see.
I saw the day that my dad cameand picked me up from my daycare
and my little brother was beingborn, and then I saw all like
immediately.
I saw all of these happymemories where we were feeding
(18:32):
horses and we were fishing, andwe were like going to the arcade
or going to a game and like Ihad suppressed all of the good
times to protect myself.
The good times weren't usefulto me when somebody can really
hurt you, so I didn't want to.
(18:53):
Just as a survival, I hadsuppressed anything that was
positive so that I knew to keepmy distance.
But by the time the meditationwas over I was just crying,
tears were coming down my face.
I called my dad and I was likeman, I forgot.
I forgot all the good times andI said I saw today that you
really did love me.
(19:14):
And then he said of course Ilove you.
And our relationship waschanged from that point forward
and we flew him to Charleston.
And we flew him back toCharleston and we were really
healed.
And it took a meditation tounlock something that I had kept
(19:36):
locked up.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
What did it feel like after you told them those words
?
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Like dude.
You know it was a total blockfor everything.
I had guarded my heart and soprobably this one relationship,
being unguarded and being open,opened up my heart to all
relationships and then I wasable to be more free, more open,
(20:04):
right?
One of the things he used totell me is men, don't cry, I'm
five, he doesn't want to hear mewhining as a five-year-old.
So I didn't cry for like 30years, and then it's only been
over the last six, seven, eightyears that I've been able to
actually experience the emotionof sadness again, and this was
(20:27):
part of that process of openingmy heart and allowing myself to
feel all the emotions.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
It's interesting how our beings are so very much
influenced by our youngestselves, and I often explain our
life as everybody's wearing abackpack.
Everybody in this world iswearing a backpack, and we're
(20:56):
often unconscious to what's inthe backpack or not aware of all
the things that we could beholding on to that aren't
serving us well, that aren'tallowing us to experience the
next level relationships or justour best version of ourselves,
(21:22):
until we really go back andunderstand and dig through, like
, okay, what is actually in here?
Actually in here.
I'll never forget the day Iforgave my dad and what was in
my backpack theoretical backpackfor 15 years at the time were
(21:43):
all the times that he came homelate, the times that there was
the infidelity with my mother,the broken promises, everything.
And how was I living my life atthat time?
I was upset, I was destructive.
(22:04):
I justified those things saying, well, I've got the quote gene,
it's just in me Because that'sthe response that he gave me.
And then I made a decision.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Yeah, I figured, I'm like oh, I just inherited a
short fuse.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
And you justify all these things.
We fabricate evidence whichwe'll get into here in a second,
and I remember I was drivingwith him.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
And I was done.
I just at that point I was likeI'm done, I'm done with holding
on to all these things and kindof recognized holy smokes.
I've got boulders in mybackpack.
No wonder I'm always upset ornot experiencing my best life.
And I said, dad, there's been alot that's happened in our
lives.
I know that you didn't mean allof it and I know that you love
(22:49):
us.
And from this point on I'mchoosing to put all of that in
the past and I forgive you.
And I remember he started andthis is making me tear up too I
remember growing up, you knowliving the life that hey, tough
guys, don't cry.
And you know he just broke downright in front of me that was
(23:12):
one of the first times I'dreally seen him just break down
like crazy, but that's one ofthe most best days of my life
too, because while some of thebehavior didn't stop after that
point, my backpack was empty andI wasn't letting anything else
in there, and I chose to justlive through love and live
(23:33):
through love versus holding onto the past.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
You said a really important thing there.
You said a really importantthing.
The behavior didn't change.
His behavior didn't change andmy dad's didn't either, but I
changed and that was the point.
The point was that you had yourtransformation.
(23:56):
You became a loving, forgivingversion of yourself, and that
was your mission as a littlesoul, and if he chooses to
change or not, that's up to him.
You forgiving.
This is a lot of times whereforgiveness can go wrong for the
person listening.
We were like well, I forgaveyou now I need you to be better.
(24:21):
It doesn't matter how they are,because forgiveness isn't really
a gift for them, and it's alsonot like letting them off the
hook.
It's just releasing thebackpack, as you said, from
yourself forgiveness is a gift.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
Yeah, forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves.
That's a great way to put it,and on that, I also see
forgiveness as something thatcan be a skill.
You talk about happiness as askill that is developed.
I remember growing up thinkingthat happiness is this emotion
(24:56):
that we choose.
And happiness sometimes myantiquated thinking was I had
the when I, then I syndrome,when I achieve X condition, then
I will be happier.
When all this junk at homestops, then I'll be happy.
What's some context behind.
(25:18):
Happiness is a skill, and howhave you cultivated that skill
in your life now?
What does that look like Now?
What does that look like?
Discipline is a key componentof this podcast and a key thing
that we preach.
We view discipline as the fuelto help you create the life that
(25:44):
you ultimately desire, anddiscipline being the fuel that
gets your habits and systems incheck so that you can actually
accomplish your goals.
If you're looking to level upin 2025, I am happy to be a part
of that and encourage you tojoin the Unshakable Discipline
Mastermind Group.
This has been my baby for acouple years and we're finally
(26:11):
launching it here in 2025.
The group consists of aself-paced course that teaches
you how to form core habits andmindset that will allow you to
accomplish your goals.
A daily accountability channelto keep you on track, motivated
and in alignment with ourmembers, and weekly mastermind
sessions where you're going tolearn from either myself or a
suite of renowned guests manywho have been on the podcast
(26:35):
that are going to share piecesof their winning playbooks
directly with you.
I've learned that being a partof groups over the years has
helped propel me to so many newlevels in life.
If you want to go fast, goalone.
If you want to go far, then gotogether, and it's my wish that
(26:58):
the Unshakeable Crew is a choicethat makes sense for you in
2025.
We are growing up to 100 membersthis year and have limited time
founding member pricing for 12more folks before we permanently
increase pricing to $97 a month.
(27:18):
You can get in now for $67 amonth, locked in for life, and
be a part of the adventure thatwe're creating with our members.
If you're somebody that cravesdiscipline, seeks it or wants it
this year, and you're reallycommitted to making lasting
changes in your life and beingaround others that are committed
(27:41):
to winning and serving theworld and sharing what they
learn with others so that wemake this world a better place,
then join the Unshakeable crew.
Go to unshakabledisciplinecomand you can sign up.
It is also in the show notesUnshakeable shake as in
(28:01):
milkshakeunshakabledisciplinecom, and
we're excited to have you in2025.
Let's go.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
It takes a lot of effort and nothing's worth more
effort because we're happy toput in a bunch of effort at work
.
All right, I'm going to work mytail off.
I'm going to do my best I canin my career and I'll work eight
to 10 hours a day for 40 yearson this career.
We're happy to put an effortthere.
Or we'll put an effort in ourphysical body.
(28:39):
I'm going to go to the gym orI'm going to go for a run and
I'm going to do this five or sixdays a week because I want to
be in peak physical condition.
And yet we think we're justsupposed to naturally be happy.
The mental health piece, wejust think, oh, we're just
supposed to have that, itdoesn't take any effort, that's
just a given.
I should just have that.
But it's exactly the same asdeveloping your skills at work
(29:02):
and it's exactly the same asdeveloping your physical skills
and it takes just as much effort.
But I'll argue that developingour happiness is the master
skill that unlocks all the otherones, because it's proven.
Many scientific studies haveshown that happy employees earn
more money.
Happy salespeople are liketwice as productive.
(29:26):
And, by the way, who wants abunch of money if you're
miserable anyway, it doesn'teven matter, like that, you're
miserable.
So or or, who needs a perfectbody if your relationships are
all falling apart?
You know?
So happiness is the skill to,to develop.
(29:47):
And uh, just this morning I wokeup and I and I had, I could
just feel negativity, and ittook me an hour with a journal.
It took me an hour with ajournal to figure out what
negative thoughts were there,because they weren't obvious and
they weren't apparent and thento reframe them to.
(30:09):
First I had to get the, andthere ended up being five
negative thoughts I could comeup with, and I put them all down
on a piece of paper and then Iworked on each one and thought,
okay, well, how else could I seethis?
Could I see this differently?
And then, is there any action Ishould take from this?
Because all negative thoughts Icall them bad moods in the book
, but they're not bad, they'regood.
(30:31):
All negative thoughts are tryingto do something helpful for us.
It's our brain trying to helpus.
The negative thoughts don'tserve no purpose.
They're not there to harm us,they're there to help us.
It's just like if you touch astove and your hand burns and it
hurts, that pain is helpful.
So all this pain, thisemotional pain, is really
helpful too.
It's saying hey, watch out,there's something here you need
(30:56):
to do, there's something youhave to address here, that's all
.
This negative thoughts are is ahelpful nudge to do something
different or to see things adifferent way.
But that took an hour of timeand I'm sure the person
listening is going to say Idon't have an hour of time.
Well, it took me from 4.30 amto 5.30 am.
Have an hour of time.
Well, it took me from 4.30 amto 5.30 am.
(31:16):
And because I purposefullyallow myself this kind of space
without my phone, my phone's onairplane mode and without having
any other things to do, Ididn't have to take care of my
kids.
I do the gym later.
I was taking my mom after I didthe kids, so I was able to get
all this done before the kidswoke up, before I did all their
lunches, before I ended uptaking them to school, before I
had coffee with my mom, before Itook her to the car shop and
(31:37):
then before I went to the gymand then before I hadn't done it
.
If I didn't have that space, Icould have been grumpy with my
kids or standoffish, and thenthey could have been in a bad
mood and then they could havegone into school, and then they
(32:01):
could have gotten in trouble,maybe because they just weren't
feeling great, and maybe Iwouldn't have been that cool to
my mom, and then the two of uscould have been cold with each
other.
Maybe Katie and I could havegotten into it Like who knows.
But instead I took all thatnegativity, worked on it,
changed it and then by the timeI saw my kids man, we were
having a blast, like we had thebest morning, and Katie started
(32:23):
to lose it a little bit becauseshe's potty training our
three-year-old boy and he's notpicking up what she's putting
down and he continues to notbody train and she's, she's
feeling a bunch of pressure,which is a negative thought, by
the way.
Um, I didn't tell her that butthe pressure, the pressure is
not necessary.
(32:44):
We can.
And that's one of the chapters,the chapter on joy.
Uh, so, but joy.
But my mood was so high that Iwas able to sustain a place for
her when she was falling thisafternoon and be like, hey, we
got this together.
She's like, well, hey, couldyou go get Kelly?
And I said I've got the space,Let me go get Kelly.
(33:06):
And I went and got Kelly andshe got a chance to take a
shower and actually take care ofherself.
All because I spent an hour toget rid of the negativity was I
able to truly serve my wife and,what's more important For me, I
told you relationships are mynumber one, so it's worth the
effort.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Can we dig into that a little more, that someone
listening might be thinking okay, I woke up with some negative
thoughts this morning as well,and is there a certain construct
, is there certain questionsthat we should be asking
ourselves about these negativethoughts or bad moods that we
may be having, so that we canwork towards understanding?
(33:46):
Okay, what is the good thatit's giving us?
As you mentioned, there's goodthat can be extracted, so what's
something that we can do as apractical exercise to follow
your lead here?
Speaker 1 (34:03):
absolutely the.
The number one tool in ourhappiness toolkit is a journal,
and my journal process is fivesteps and it's and the first
step is negative thoughts.
Some days I don't have any andI I get to my journal and I'm
like I feel good, like Iactually feel amazing.
(34:25):
So negative thoughts that's nota thing on those days and
that's like maybe four or five,even six days out of seven, but
at least one out of seven, atleast one, and for me and this
is all I do, I'm a happinesscoach At least one out of seven.
There are negative thoughtsthat I have to address.
But I start there.
I start my.
(34:50):
The journal process is you sitdown, I have a cup of coffee,
because coffee makes me feelgood, and I'm sipping my coffee
and I'm just searching my mind.
Are there any negative thoughts?
And so my first negativethought was I'm disconnected
from the people at my office.
I wrote it down I'm feelingdisconnected from the people in
my office.
And then the next negativethought was I made a selfish
(35:11):
choice with my daughter.
I chose to put a surgery justbefore her big cheer competition
.
I'm selfish.
And then the next negativethought I don't know if I'm
going to be able to think of allfive.
Speaker 2 (35:23):
That's fine, that helps, yeah, just basic.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
These are two good examples.
These are our first two, butbefore I started to fix them all
and this is a really importantthing get all the negativity out
.
One day I went through and Isaid, man, my face is ugly, but
I wrote it down.
And that was just one of thenegative, negative thoughts that
I had.
Doesn't matter if it's true ornot, doesn't even matter if it's
(35:50):
harsh.
Another thing Another day, onthat same day, I said I was a
douchebag to my friend Brewer.
So I was calling myself a nameRight and you want to write like
the real stuff, write the realstuff.
If douchebag is in yourvernacular, in your negative
thoughts, write that down.
Don't clean it up, don't churchit up, just write down whatever
(36:15):
the negativity is, because it'sin there.
If you try to filter thenegativity, it still stays in
there.
I see this as a chance to dumpthe backpack onto the page.
Then, once I got them all outand I've got five of them there
then the next step is okay, howcan I reframe these?
So, going to the first one, itwas I feel disconnected with the
(36:39):
people in my company and thatcan be bad, because if I'm
disconnected, I own a realestate companyents can leave and
they do all the time.
It's like a pretty highturnover, high turnover position
.
And so I just reframed it.
And my reframe was we're moreconnected this year than we've
(37:00):
ever been, which is a truth.
We've been more focused onone-on-one lunches and creating
a really empowering environment.
Trainings I brought on allthese different trainers, I
started to list them out andthen I asked myself is there any
action I could take?
And I said here's what I'mgoing to do.
(37:20):
I'm going to text every one ofthem today individually.
And so I wrote that down as anaction text every person in my
company.
And then the next negativethought was I made a selfish
decision with my daughter.
I scheduled a surgery the daybefore her cheer competition
because it was the opening thatwas coming up next and that
means I might not see the firstday of her cheer competition.
(37:41):
I was just feeling selfishabout that and I reframed it and
I said well, I'm going to seeher second day of the cheer
competition and every singlenight I spend time every single
night right now helping her withher cheer routine, like nightly
before she goes to bed.
Her and I work on this cheerroutine that she's doing and I
(38:05):
just said I'm not selfish withmy daughter, I'm giving her
everything I've got, and I wrotedown action Is there any action
I can take here?
And the answer was no.
I just needed to see that, eventhough I felt selfish, I
actually had counterpoints thatsaid I wasn't selfish in this
arena.
And so the counter like whenyou write the reframe next to
(38:26):
the negative thought I justfigure it like it neutralizes it
.
It's like maybe you know, whenwe go camping and you get some
water and it might have somebacteria in it, but you can put
some iodine or some pills in itand it neutralizes the stuff
that can harm you and then youcan drink the water and it's
clean.
That's kind of how I see thesenegative thoughts.
Speaker 2 (38:49):
I love the simplicity of it and one thing that's
interesting is you know youreference Byron Katie's work a
good bit in Good Mood Revolutionand I just got her book as well
.
It got recommended from a recentpodcast guest Absolute
masterclass and one of the keyquestions that she poses is what
(39:13):
makes a thought true?
We can often fabricate evidencethat we are selfish or that we
are disconnected and completelydisregard the evidence that we
have manufactured that.
No, actually we're way furtheralong because of all the things
(39:35):
that we've done to have teambuilding events or all of the
nights that you've spent withyour daughter.
It's easy sometimes for us tofabricate evidence and ignore
what we've manufactured, andthis goes into really the power
that we possess.
I was listening to a recentpodcast episode you had on Good
(39:56):
Mood Revolution and you weretalking about belief systems and
how you previously struggledwith maybe things such as I'm
not worthy or maybe I am aterrible boss.
What are some beliefs that youfound yourself often fabricating
(40:17):
evidence for that you had towork on the hardest to shift, to
develop the sense of confidencethat you have today and the
confidence that you possess andbring to the table in every
endeavor that you go on.
Speaker 1 (40:37):
Yeah, in the book I talk about the eight bad moods,
and there's only eight.
Every single negative feelingwe can ever have falls into one
of the eight buckets of badmoods and those are shame, which
was my biggest one.
It was what we started thisepisode with I feel unlovable or
unworthy of love, and that wasa linchpin lie.
(41:00):
It was a lie and that onebelief from that stemmed like
maybe thousands of other beliefs.
And then I had all thisevidence that was pointing to
the fact that I really wasunlovable or unworthy of love.
And then I had to prove that Iwas and that was useful.
(41:20):
Again, it was my mind helpingme.
At least my mind thought it washelping me.
My mind was like, oh, do moreand do more and do more.
And it thought, then you'll be,finally, you'll be worthy of
love and then you'll haveeverything you want.
But it never was going to workbecause I had this linchpin
belief I was unlovable.
As soon as I was able to turnthat around and pull that
linchpin because it wasn't eventrue the whole belief structure
(41:42):
just crumbled and I found thetruth, which was I, was that
beautiful little soul that wasthe light of the world, and that
it was just a cloak of darkness.
It wasn't even true.
And this is what's neat aboutdarkness as soon as you shine
the light on it, it wasn't.
It's not even there, likenothing needs to happen.
All you need to do is turn onthe light and the darkness goes
away.
So that was a major negativebelief.
(42:06):
But I've had all eight of them,and so the next negative belief
is guilt, and guilt says peopledeserve to be punished for the
things they do wrong.
That's a big one, and, man,look at all the political
campaigns that go on and it'sall this guilt-driven content.
(42:27):
I was raised in a Catholicfamily, catholic.
There's a lot of guilt there.
I had to go into a tiny roomwith a man who told me to tell
him everything I'd done wrong,and then he told me that I had
to repent for all the things I'ddone wrong.
It was ingrained and I had allthis evidence that I just need
to be punished all the time.
Well, that also is a superdestructive belief, and as soon
(42:48):
as I pulled that linchpin outthat people deserve punishment
for doing things wrong andreplaced it with a truer truth,
which is if you do things wrong,there's consequences, but no
more punishment is required.
The consequence was enough andthere's always a consequence,
because karma is absolute.
Like says, every single hair iscounted, so everything that we
(43:12):
do, good or bad.
This is why integrity is soimportant.
Why it's so important to me isthat every single deed is
recorded by the universe.
So you get away with nothing,even if you think you got away
with something, but you don'tdeserve.
You know there's no punishment,there's just a consequence, and
the consequence is meant toteach you and you don't need to
be punished beyond that.
So those are two really big,important beliefs and anyone
(43:35):
listening needs to know likethose need to be.
Those are two cornerstonebeliefs to change.
The next one is the lie thatlife is hopeless, that the
future is hopeless.
If you're in that man, the onlything you can do is get help,
because once you fall into thislie that the future is hopeless,
(43:59):
that we can't do anything,we're overwhelmed by the demands
of life.
We truly believe there's nohope, so we need someone else to
help us.
So if you're in that, findsomeone.
They'll help you.
Ryan will help you, I'll helpyou.
Just reach out.
Life is never hopeless.
And then you get into thisbelief of fear that bad things
(44:19):
can happen to me in the futureand we can just stay in anxiety
like all these bad things arecoming.
That's kind of what was goingon this morning.
There was a fear that I pulledout of myself that I was
disconnected from my company andthat people could leave.
That was good man, that wasactually a good nudge.
(44:39):
I did text every single personindividually in my company and
had a ton of great conversationsand connected with some people
and somebody's dad was justgiven a bad diagnosis and I was
able to get on the phone withthem and, like, really be there
with them and and you know the,the fear that I was disconnected
led to once I found it andwrote it down, led to an action
(45:02):
to make me connected and it wasreally powerful.
But what typically we do is wedon't have time to deal with
these beliefs or these thoughts,and so we got this underlying
fear that we're disconnected orsomething, that our job is in
jeopardy or whatever, and wejust don't write it down or
figure it out and then it juststays there.
And then another fear shows uplike I'm selfish, and then that
(45:24):
one stays there that mydaughter's not going to like me
and all these other fears, andthey just compound.
And all of a sudden, you justfind out that you're anxious.
You're like I don't know why,but I've got anxiety.
Well, it's because you've beenignoring every single fear and
not dealing with it and thentaking appropriate action.
The fear is helpful and um, butwe have to figure it out and we
(45:44):
have to figure out what itwants us to do.
It's it's not there to harm us,it's there to help us.
So those are some bigcornerstone beliefs for me that
I was able to to figure out andturn around.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
I love the fact that, even with the we call them bad
moods, they deliver.
They're there to deliversomething good and another thing
that it's.
It's not referenced exactlylike this in the book, but it
makes me refer back to aconversation I had with Chris
Doris, who is the mentaltoughness coach, works with a
(46:14):
lot of PGA athletes andmentioned Byron Katie's work to
me.
Chris, in his mental toughnessmantras, says it ain't bad, it
is.
You know, life is like it'sjust, life just is.
And from there, you know, we,we choose our state or we work
(46:35):
towards our state.
There's eight bad moods.
What do you do to ensure thatthe good moods stay on top and
the good moods stay winning andwe keep the bad moods out of
(46:55):
play?
It doesn't mean the bad moodsare never going to come into
play.
You mentioned that they cameinto play this morning, but we
can also feed.
From what I interpret this workto be, we can feed the good
moods a heck of a lot more andstay on top.
So what's some context you canprovide there to keep the good
moods flowing and ignited morethan our bad moods?
Speaker 1 (47:24):
Yeah, so I'll finish with the journal process,
because that it's we become thethings we do repeatedly.
And uh, step three on myjournal process once I come up
with any negative thoughts ifthere are any, and then reframe
them is I write down threethings I win at, three things
(47:44):
from the day before that werewins, and usually I end up with
four or five, but some days I'vestruggled to come up with three
things that I did well the daybefore.
But this is a really powerfulprocess because again it goes
back to that guilt this I'm notdoing enough, I'm not good
(48:09):
enough.
Once we start to and that'scoming from a powerful place too
because our mind is like domore, do more, do more.
It'll be helpful for you,you'll survive more, you'll
stack more money and if anythinghappens, you'll have money and
you can pay for it.
You'll be and you'll be okay.
So it's not trying to hurt us,but what?
What it does is the mind'salways looking at what are we
not doing right so we could fixit, because it needs to be fixed
(48:33):
.
But what it doesn't do, this issuper crazy man.
It doesn't tell us what isgoing well unless we ask it.
And we have to ask it what isgoing well?
Consciously, because if it'sgoing well, like, go back to us
living in tribes in the SavannahIf it was going well, we didn't
(48:55):
need to spend energy on it,because it took all of our
energy to go, get food andsurvive and not do things wrong
or not get kicked out of thetribe or not say the wrong thing
.
So the brain only spent itsenergy on what wasn't going well
, because if it was going well,great, you got that covered, I
don't need energy on it.
Well now, dude, grocery storehas all the food we need, we're
(49:15):
all living, we're all surviving.
We don't need to be thatvigilant over survival at this
moment, and so we have to feedour brain with positivity, and I
do that by writing down threethings that went well the day
before.
This doesn't seem like it's abig deal, but it changes
everything.
What happens is throughout theday.
My mind now keeps an open filefor what I'm doing right,
(49:40):
because it knows it has tocollect what I'm doing right and
keep it in stored memory sothat the next day it doesn't
take me too long to figure outwhat I did right the day before.
Well then, it's like in themoment that I did something
right, it's like, oh, you justdid that right.
And I'm like, heck, yeah, I did.
And I get this hit of dopaminethat I feel good about it.
The next day when I write itdown, I get the hit of dopamine
(50:02):
again and I feel good about it,get the hit of dopamine again
and I feel good about it.
And then, instead of seeingeverything that everyone's doing
wrong, I start to seeeverything everyone's doing
right.
I'm like, oh, they're doingthat right and they're doing
that right, and they're doingthat right.
And I start affirming how greateverybody is and they're like,
oh man, thank you, and it's notlike BS, because I actually am
noticing what they're doingright and I'm excited about it
(50:22):
because I've trained my mind tobe excited about what's going
right.
And then they feel really good.
And then they turn around, theytreat me really good, and then
all my relationships areflourishing and I'm like it's
just this huge upward spiral,all from just writing down three
things you did well the daybefore.
So super powerful habit, and itis probably the cornerstone for
me of why I'm such a positiveperson right now.
(50:47):
The last two things I do on thisfive-step process is, I do
write down three brand newthings I'm grateful for three
things I've never written before.
And it's the same concept.
Gratitude can become a chore ifit's like oh okay, I'm grateful
for my wife, I'm grateful formy kids, I'm grateful for our
health.
Well then, it's just boring androte.
(51:07):
But I wait in the morning andI'm like what are three new
things I'm grateful for?
I've been doing this for like13 years, every single day.
I don't know how many days thatis, but it sounds like a lot
Like 40,000 days times three120,000 new things.
I've had to find 120,000 newthings I'm grateful for.
(51:30):
You would think after the firstthousand you would run out right
.
But then you find out you canactually be grateful for every
single thing the challenges, thethings that didn't go right,
the smile somebody gave you theday before, the fact that you
were up late helping yourdaughter with cheerleading.
You could just be grateful forall of it.
And you're like, wow, thishabit now makes you grateful for
(51:53):
all of life.
And, as you started thisepisode out, gratitude is the
gateway to all positivity.
And then I end the fifth step,and I got this from Tony
Robbins' priming and I writedown actually this came
originally.
It came from Grant Cardone andI can't remember which book, but
(52:15):
he said write your goals, yourtop life goals, as if they're
already achieved, until they'reachieved every day.
And I started doing that.
I think it was this first book,the 10X Rule, that I read that
in, and I started to just writemy top goals as if they were
achieved, every single day,until they were achieved.
I haven't stopped, because whathappened is everything I
(52:37):
started to write down every daycame true, and I'm like this
might be the cheat code to haveanything I want in life come
true and guess what it is.
So if there's anything I want,I wrote down every single day.
I write a bestselling book.
I wrote it down every day forfour years because when I first
(53:00):
started to write it I didn'tbelieve it.
Like who would want to read abook about happiness from a guy
that runs a real estate company?
There was so much impostersyndrome.
But then I wrote it down fouryears, every single day for four
years, again, 1,200 times, Iwrite a bestselling book on my
(53:21):
page.
Then the book hit in Decemberand was a bestseller in seven
different categories on Amazonand was the first book to a
hundred reviews, like thefastest book to a hundred
reviews in Forbes history.
And it was.
Is it because I wrote it down amillion times?
You bet your butt Like it wasbecause I wrote it down all
those times.
So I end my journal process bywriting my top three life goals
(53:46):
as if they're already achieved.
Until they're achieved.
Speaker 2 (53:48):
Greatness happens twice.
It happens in your mind first,and then in reality.
And if we can't see the thingwhether it's the bestselling
book or the family that weultimately envision, the sub
three hour marathon, whatever Ifyou can't see it upstairs in
your mind, then you're likelynot going to see it right in
(54:14):
front of your very eyes becauseyou're not awake to the
possibilities.
Was there a certain turningpoint along the journey of
writing?
I wrote a bestselling book forfour years that you start to
actually believe it.
Like you mentioned, impostersyndrome, Was it okay?
Maybe the first week you'relike man, this is BS, there's no
(54:35):
way.
And then was it coupled?
with something, I would imagine,a series of actions, maybe when
you actually first startedwriting the book that you're
like huh, you know what?
No, I can do this, I am doingthis.
What did that look like?
Speaker 1 (54:56):
I wrote it every day for a year with nothing, no
action.
I didn't even know what thebook was going to be about and I
was just.
I was a CEO of a like, like,massively growing company, with
three babies and a new marriage,and I was trying to hold it all
(55:18):
together.
And yet I had this vision Iwrite this bestselling book.
And it just wasn't.
But I continued to write itdown because it was important to
me.
But I wasn't believing.
I'm like, yeah, maybe when I'm50, like it'll show up someday.
And then I went to a businessconference in Colorado and I'm
(55:39):
going skiing with my buddies andthis dude comes up and he's
like, oh, hey, man, I'll jump inwith you guys.
And he gets on the lift andhe's sitting next to me and it's
a four times New York Timesbestselling author, a guy named
Tucker Max.
And I had read Tucker's bookswhen I was in college.
They were crude and funny andwe would listen to the audio CDs
(56:00):
, driving the string break andstuff, and I knew who he was.
I was like, oh, dude, man, yourbooks are so funny.
He said, oh, yeah, I appreciateit.
I've changed a lot since then.
I said, okay, cool man.
I'm like what are you doing now?
He said well, now I helpauthors publish their books.
And I said that's crazy.
I'm supposed to write a book.
And he said tell me about yourbook.
(56:21):
And I gave him a vague idea,because at this point I'd been
writing it for a year that Iwrite this bestselling book.
I said it's going to be abouthow to not be in a bad mood.
And he said I want to read thatbook.
And he said you should get intouch with my company.
And he gave me the contactinformation and that's what I
did.
I reached out to his companyand they needed like $17,000,
(56:45):
which was, you know, it's a bigsum of money.
And I'm like I had written downI write a bestselling book so
many times.
And then the encounter with thisguy who helps people write
books on a chairlift randomlyDidn't feel random.
It felt like divine guidance,and so I committed On the call.
(57:05):
I said here's $17,000.
And I gave them this huge chunkof money and then I don't know
if I talked to Katie first ornot, but either way, I was so
committed because I had writtenthe goal so many times, that
then I was ready for theopportunity when it showed up
and they had a process and theirprocess was amazing about how
(57:27):
to write a book if you've neverwritten a book, so that it's
going to be good.
And I got on a call with Tuckerand he said, matt, if your book
sucks, it's going to hurt you,so your book can't suck.
It's going to hurt you, so yourbook can't suck.
That put a lot of pressure onme, but it was also good for me.
(57:49):
So I spent four years writingit.
It took me four years because Iwrote it probably seven
different times.
Every chapter was reworked atleast seven times.
It ended up being 500 pages andthrough the process of
rewriting and editing I got itdown to 165 pages of the most
powerful stuff.
And that was based on Tucker'scomment to me if you write a bad
(58:13):
book, it's going to hurt you.
And writing a really good booktakes a ton of effort, and so I
just put in a ton of effort andthis is a great book, matt, and
it's a masterclass.
Speaker 2 (58:22):
Matt, what do you wish to ignite with the Good
Mood Revolution and I use igniteintentionally this time,
because it's right there on thecover of the book and you make
reference to the match that isnot only on the front cover, but
on the chapter pages.
What is Good Mood Revolutionintended to ignite in the lives
(58:48):
and minds of readers?
Speaker 1 (58:54):
Yeah, man, it's a revolution because we've got the
, we've got these, we got thenegative piece right, we've got
this piece of us that thatbelieves all these negative
thoughts and and and then.
But we don't want to stay there, and so it's almost like a
battle within ourselves to findthe positivity.
(59:15):
But what I want to like, my bigvision of it right now, is uh,
I want to, I want to help theworld be happier, and you can
only do that with you.
Know I.
I could say that's alreadyaccomplished because people
every single week are writing meand telling me that they've
become happier.
So I've got a quantifiable goalI want to help, um, I want to
(59:37):
have 100,000 engaged YouTubesubscribers that I'm helping
live a happier life, and that'sthe vision right now.
I want to ignite happiness in100,000 people's lives in an
engaged, regular way, because Ifigure that's a big round number
.
It's also a number I wrote downfour years ago, when I started
(59:58):
writing the book, on a piece ofpaper that I would have 100,000
people that were following meand feeling better about this
thing.
But man, think about those100,000 people know people, and
then those people know peopleand those people know people.
The whole world can becomehappier.
Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
if you've affected other people, world can become
happier if you, if you'veaffected other people.
And Matt, how do we bestsupport you along that journey?
And obviously subscribe to theYouTube channel, but what are
the other ways that we can be ofbest support and service to you
and your mission?
Speaker 1 (01:00:34):
Man, you're doing it, bro.
Just your friendship means theworld to me.
Man, you're somebody thatinspires the heck out of me and
I'm excited for everythingyou're doing.
It, bro.
Just your friendship means theworld to me.
Man, you're somebody thatinspires the heck out of me and
I'm excited for everythingyou're doing on your work making
the world more focused and moredisciplined and understanding
that they can accomplishanything that they think that
they can accomplish.
That message is really powerfuland it's really needed.
(01:00:55):
I appreciate your friendship.
Speaker 2 (01:00:56):
I'm encouraging everyone to keep up with Matt
and buy Good Mood Revolution.
Listen to Good Mood Revolutionanywhere that you have podcasts,
but preferably on YouTube, matt, it's customary to end the
podcast with a rapid firesession, and the way this works
is we're going to have lunch ata cool rooftop in Charleston and
(01:01:18):
we're going up three elevatorfloors and a person is going to
step in an elevator and go upone floor and they recognize you
, they've read the book, they'velistened to the pod and they're
going to ask you one question.
So the amount of time you haveto answer is the amount of time
it takes to go up one elevator,one elevator floor.
So if you're ready, then herewe go.
This is one gem, one step, onebook.
(01:01:41):
So we get on.
Someone hops on with us.
They say Matt man.
I've read Good Mid-Revolution.
It's such a great book.
What's one gem that you have,whether it be a quote or a
mantra that you live your lifeby, that I can put in my back
pocket and live my life by?
Speaker 1 (01:02:00):
I can put in my back pocket and live my life by.
Yeah, you want to love yourselfevery moment that you can and
whenever possible.
When you're looking at someoneor talking with someone, picture
them surrounded by love as well.
Speaker 2 (01:02:13):
That person just got off and another person hopped on
Matt.
I love Good Moon Revolution.
Another person hopped on Matt.
I love good mood revolution.
What's one step that I can taketoday to achieve a good mood in
my life?
Speaker 1 (01:02:31):
The easiest step is gratitude, and it has to be a
ritual, it has to be a habit.
So we usually eat three times aday.
I recommend just saying a quickprayer before your meal and
saying thank you for this meal,thank you for this life, thank
you for everything that I havegoing for me, amen.
(01:02:51):
And then we start to eat, andit's everyone eats and we eat
multiple times a day.
This takes a few seconds andyou were anchoring this
gratitude habit to something youalready do.
Speaker 2 (01:03:02):
Going back to the beginning, gratitude is the
gateway to good mood.
The last one, which may be themost difficult for someone
that's as well-read as you, matt.
What's one book, in addition toGood Mood Revolution, that we
should read in 2025 to improveour mindsets?
Speaker 1 (01:03:25):
I love the surrender experiment.
In that book Michael Singertells his life story about how
everything that was happening tohim that he didn't like he knew
was sent by a higher power,kind of like Tucker Max getting
(01:03:48):
on that ski lift with me.
The book ends with him goingthrough the most excruciating
thing that he could imagine andagain it was sent to him to help
him.
He was in Charleston, southCarolina.
Actually the Supreme Court ofthe United States was sentencing
him to a life in prison becausehe had been framed.
His company was WebMD.
He had been framed forembezzling money by one of his
(01:04:08):
employees and while he waswaiting for his sentence it was
like a four or five year trial.
He lost his company.
He had built it from his owngarage.
It was worth billions ofdollars that had been taken from
him.
They had seized all of hisassets and uh and he wrote the
book the untethered soul, whichhas changed the lives of
(01:04:32):
millions of people at this pointand helped them live happier.
And uh, that's the point of thesurrender experiment.
Is that everything that'shappening to you in your life is
not happening to you.
Speaker 2 (01:04:42):
Things don't happen to us, they happen for us and
that's a first time this bookhas been recommended on the pod,
so appreciate that we could addthat into the repository matt.
It's been such an amazingconversation and thank you for
how you choose to serve theworld and for how you're serving
the world, your family, beingan inspiration and igniting a
(01:05:08):
good mood, revolution, so thatwe can experience our best
selves and win today.
Thanks so much you.
is, I write down three things.
I win at Three things from theday before that were wins, and
usually I end up with four orfive.
You know, and I'm not you know,but some days I've struggled to
come up with three things thatI did well the day before.
But this is a really powerfulprocess because again it goes
(00:24):
back to that guilt, this um, I'mnot, I'm not doing enough, I'm
not good enough.
Once we start to and that'scoming from a powerful place too
because our mind is like domore, do more, do more, It'll be
helpful for you, You'll survivemore, You'll stack more money
and then, if anything happens,you'll have money and you can
pay for it and you'll be okay.
So it's not trying to hurt us.
(00:45):
What it does is it always themind's always looking at what
are we not doing right so we canfix it, because it needs to be
fixed what it doesn't do.
This is super crazy man.
It doesn't tell us what isgoing well unless we ask it.
And we and we have to ask itwhat is going well?
Consciously, Because if it'sgoing well like, go back to us
(01:10):
living in tribes in the SavannahIf it was going well, we didn't
need to spend energy on it,because it took all of our
energy to go, get food andsurvive and not do things wrong
or not get kicked out of thetribe or not say the wrong thing
.
So the brain only spent itsenergy on what wasn't going well
, because if it was going well,great, you got that covered, I
don't need energy on it.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Welcome to the Wednesday podcast, a weekly
resource thoughtfully crafted tohelp people build and refine
discipline, accomplish theirgoals, fortify their mindsets
and be of service to somebody inthis world.
My name is Ryan Cass and I ammindsets and be of service to
somebody in this world.
My name is Ryan Cass and I amyour host, and it is my mission
and commitment to deliveramazing episodes to you every
week where you'll learn frommyself or a renowned expert in
(01:57):
their field.
We love helping people win inevery aspect of their lives, and
you can help us win by sharingthe show with somebody that you
believe will benefit from it,subscribing and leaving a rating
and review.
We believe that everybody inthis world is meant to do
something great with their lives, and we're here to help play a
(02:17):
role in that.
Thank you for tuning in andlet's win today.
First foot on the floor, I saythank.
Then, as my other foot hits thefloor, I say you.
With each successive step, Iquietly repeat thank you, thank
(02:38):
you, thank you.
If you repeat the words thankyou to start each day,
especially on the mornings whenyou don't feel like it, you too
will strengthen your gratitude.
There is a very good reason todo this.
Gratitude is the gateway to goodmoods.
It's not always possible to gofrom a bad mood to immediately
feeling happy, but it ispossible to go from a bad mood
(03:01):
to feeling grateful for beingalive.
Then, once you are grateful,you can shift back into a good
mood, to feeling grateful forbeing alive.
Then, once you are grateful,you can shift back into a good
mood.
We've got someone that I'mincredibly grateful for, and
that is my friend and brother,matt O'Neill, who is the author
of the Good Mood Revolution book, which we just heard from the
(03:21):
host of the Good Mood Revolutionpodcast, ceo of Matt O'Neill
Real Estate but, moreimportantly, someone who is an
incredible family man that isigniting happiness in the lives
of countless people around theworld.
Matt, welcome my friend.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
What's up, ryan Dude?
I am so thrilled to be on thispodcast so we said some cool
things about you.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
You've done some amazing things in your life and
now, with your most recentsuccess, you've got the good
mood revolution book.
A lot of amazing things inthere that we can read about you
.
But let's dig into Matt alittle bit first.
What do you say is somethingthat we wouldn't be able to find
(04:12):
on your resume that makes youreally proud, and why?
Speaker 1 (04:21):
What makes me really proud?
That's not on my resume.
Hmm, what makes me really proud?
That's not on my resume.
You know I was at the I LoveCoaching event that Adam Roach
puts on and John Maxwell wasspeaking and John said I want to
be admired most by the peoplewho know me best.
(04:43):
And, man, I'm proud to say thatthat's my number one goal, that
it's great to make a positiveimpact in the lives of people.
I don't know.
I was actually reading thereviews on my book just this
week and I came to tears aboutpeople saying how their lives
had transformed just reading thebook and that's great.
But I want to make a biggerimpact in my children's lives
(05:08):
and in my wife's life and Ireally want to pour into those
relationships.
And that's something that noteverybody gets to see and that's
also why it can get pushed tothe side, but it's a huge focus
of mine to be the biggest heroto the people who know me best.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
If you weren't in the room and you were the topic of
conversation, what would youwish and hope that the people
that are most meaningful to youwould have to say about you and
the impact that you have intheir lives?
Speaker 1 (05:44):
That I care, that I care about them and that I would
stop anything to help them.
And for me, that's the mostimportant thing is that we are
all busy.
You're super busy.
You got a lot of things goingon.
I've got a lot of things goingon and I really want to
(06:05):
prioritize these relationships,and this isn't always the
easiest thing.
So this morning, um well, lastnight, my mom said okay, hey,
you're going to take me to havemy car fixed, right?
And I said, yeah, we're goingto go.
She said it's tomorrow morning.
I'm like, oh, tomorrow morning,yep, we're going to go.
(06:29):
This is the third or fourthtime that she's reminded me that
I'm going to take her to gether car.
You know, just like, follow herto the dealership and and bring
her home.
And she said, well, they openat eight.
I said, oh, perfect, well, youknow, I'm on Friday mornings
it's just me and the kids.
I let Katie have her space andI take care of the kids on
Friday.
I said I've got the kids, I'mgoing to get them ready, I'll
drive them to school and thenI'll go get my workout done and
I'll be at your place around8.30, 8.45.
(06:51):
And she goes oh yeah, I wasreally hoping it was going to be
eight.
When they opened I was like well, I mean, it could probably just
be 8.45,.
Right, it's a car dealership.
They take cars at any time inthe morning.
And then my wife says you knowwhat?
I'll take your mom, I'll takeher, and then you get your
(07:15):
workout in.
I know, you got a busy daytomorrow.
I was like okay, and then, as Iwas about to go to bed that
night this was last night I saidKatie, I'm going to take my mom
.
And I sent her a text.
I said hey, I committed to youthat I was going to take you.
Here's what I'll do I'll dropthe kids at school and then I'll
come to your house at 730 andyou and I can sit and have
(07:35):
coffee for 30 minutes and thenwe'll go and be there right on
time at eight o'clock and I'llfind a different time to get the
workout in.
And that's what I did.
And so this is like it's notthe easiest decision all the
time because we've got thesecompeting priorities, but it is
(07:55):
a big focus of mine to put mypriority number one.
I write this all the time Oneof my top three life goals is
actually the first life goal Iwrite down Weekly in my journal.
I have three life goals on myweekly section and the first one
I write down is relationshipsare my number one priority.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
I love that.
That's amazing, and Iappreciate that you put that
into action and that one thingyou mentioned is that holding
your word is extremely important, and there's much mention of
integrity and being your word inGood Mood Revolution, so it's
(08:41):
refreshing to hear that.
It's inspiring to hear, rather.
So it's refreshing to hear thatit's inspiring to hear, rather,
that you're being a steward ofyour word and the teachings of
Good Mood Revolution.
Matt, one thing that our goodfriend, chris Singleton said
that I often think about andshare when I'm telling stories
(09:02):
about why I do what I do is thateverybody has a story behind a
stance and, of all the ways thatwe can serve people in this
world, there's countless ways wecan serve people in this world.
Whether it's through mindsetcoaching, whether it's through
home services, everyone's gotsomething that really drives
(09:23):
them to do what they do.
What's the story behind thestance for choosing to focus on
igniting the good moodrevolution, and what was it in
your life that ultimately servedas the catalyst for going down
(09:43):
this journey and impacting livesin the way that you do today?
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Every single role model can be such a blessing.
Even the ones that are at thetime don't seem like it.
And so for me, my dad wassomebody that I had a lot of
challenges with and he was areally tough dad to be raised by
.
And then he left our familywhen I was five and he didn't
(10:16):
want anything to do with me andhe wasn't somebody that upheld
his end of the bargain.
He didn't keep his promises, hewasn't there for his four
children, and it washeartbreaking and it had me
think that I wasn't worthy ofhis love and that actually I
wasn't worthy of God's love.
That was a big one for me.
(10:36):
I'm like man, I'm just five,you know, I'm a five-year-old
kid, but I'm like, what's wrongwith me?
Why did God not love me enoughto give me a dad that would be
there and protect me?
And I couldn't reconcile it, Icouldn't figure it out, you know
, again, I was just a kid, andso then I got into a bunch of
bad moods and, as I grew older,that kind of thought that I'm
(10:58):
unlovable, there's somethingwrong with me, that kind of
festered, and I wanted to provethat I was lovable.
So I tried as much as I couldto accomplish.
I'm like, oh, if I just peoplelike me when I'm doing well and
they like put me up on apedestal and say, like look at
how well he did.
So I'll just keep accomplishingand accomplishing.
But I still felt really bad andthen it turned into a bunch of
(11:22):
addiction and through addictionI started to be really
destructive and it wasself-destruction.
And this is kind of whataddiction always is.
Addiction is an attempt to feelgood, which is admirable.
I wanted to feel good.
I didn't know how I'm takingthe easy road to feel good, but
ultimately it's because there'ssomething wrong.
And then one day it just cameto me through the grace of God.
(11:48):
My cousin said, hey, you shouldwatch this movie, the movie the
Secret.
And I saw the Secret by RhondaByrne, I was 25.
And she said everything in yourlife is created by your
thoughts and emotions.
All the good in your life iscreated by your positive
thoughts and emotions, and allthe bad in your life is created
(12:09):
by your negative thoughts andemotions.
You know, it's the law ofattraction.
And I was like I had neverheard it.
I didn't know what was going onand it just blew my mind.
And so I went on a quest tofigure out how can I stop having
these negative thoughts andemotions and how can I create
really positive thoughts andemotions.
And the law you know she callsit the law of attraction.
(12:33):
It's not in my book I talkabout.
This is level six of 16.
But, man, when you come fromwhere I came from, which was
level one, I'm not worthy oflove.
Level six, which is, hey, youcan manifest the life you want,
it feels amazing.
And so I dove super hard intothat.
(12:53):
And then it turned into just anobsession with trying to help
other people, including myself,live happier and happier and
happier and heal all the painthat had been passed down to us
or that we had decided when wewere little kids, because it's
not necessary, we don't have tosuffer like that.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
As you were explaining that, it brought me
back to my early years, and wehad a similar conversation
recently on your podcast aboutwhat's the genesis for why we do
what we do, and what you and Ishare in common is that both of
(13:33):
our fathers have struggled and,in many ways, unintentionally
also served as our greatestteacher In that.
In those moments, moments isn'tthat cool, you know, and that's
one thing to extract from thatis that even the people that we
(13:55):
encounter in our lives that mayhurt us or that may we may
perceive more negativeexperiences, there is positive
that can be extracted, and thesepeople can still teach us and
give us something that is goingto serve us for decades to come.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
And that's what I heard.
That's the impact that I heardthat your father Walsh, and he
was the author of a book calledConversations with God.
That was a really big seller inthe late 90s and early 2000s.
But he wrote this littlechildren's book and I bought it
and read it to my kids.
But it had more impact on methan the kids.
(15:00):
And the story is there's alittle soul up in heaven and's
talking to God and he's like God, what am I?
And God said you're the light.
You're all that's good in theworld.
You are love and joy and peaceand fun and creativity.
He's like you are just thelight of the world.
And the soul's like what's thelight?
(15:22):
And God said oh, that's right,you can't see it because you're
surrounded by all that is goodhere in heaven.
You're like a candle.
That's this beautiful, brightlight.
But you're sitting on thesurface of the sun and so you
can't even see yourself.
And the soul says well, how canI know myself?
How can I see myself as thelight?
(15:43):
How could I figure out what Iam?
And God's like well, to do thatyou'd have to go into the
darkness.
And the little soul said well,that sounds interesting.
And God's like yeah, I mean,it's not going to be easy, but
if you really want to knowyourself as the light, that's
what you got to do.
And he said, okay, well, let'sdo it.
(16:04):
And God said, well, you shouldprobably work on something while
you're doing this.
Is there any kind of qualityyou want to grow in yourself
that you want to learn about?
And he thought about it for awhile and he said you know, I'd
like to work on forgiveness.
And God's like oh, it's a greatone, good choice.
(16:28):
He said well, go get one ofyour friends and see if one of
your friends will help you learnthis quality of forgiveness.
And so he goes and he grabs abuddy.
He's like hey, man, will youhelp me with, with forgiveness?
And his buddy's like oh, I loveyou a lot, man, that's a tough
one, but I'll do it.
And his friend starts to put onthese dark cloaks and he
becomes, starts to look sadderand sadder and sadder.
And little soul's like like,what are you doing?
He's like I'm helping you.
And god says, all right, areyou guys ready?
(16:48):
And they're like we're ready.
And then he sends them bothdown into the darkness of earth.
One is the father and one isthe little boy wow, wow, I never
knew that story.
Did you.
It's powerful man and it startsto have.
(17:09):
You see that all these peoplewe think were hard for us may
have actually been buddies thatwere just playing a role to help
our development.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
What did forgiveness look like to your father?
Yeah, man.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
I was at a tony robbins date with destiny event
and, uh, he took us, he, he didthis meditation and it's, you
know, there's like 10 000 peoplethere and so when a whole group
of people is in a meditationlike that, there's an energy to
it and there's, there was justthis energy in the room and he's
like, and he's asking me aboutmy earliest memory.
(17:49):
And so I'm in this meditation,I'm going back to my earliest
memory and I picture myself atDisney World.
My brother was taking me on theteacups and we were playing on
a Dumbo's ears and I was likethree years old.
That was my earliest memory.
It's the memory I always wentto when people said what's your
earliest memory?
And then he said, no, there's amemory earlier than that.
(18:10):
And then, bam, my consciousnesswas just flooded with earlier
memories and I started to see.
I saw the day that my dad cameand picked me up from my daycare
and my little brother was beingborn, and then I saw all like
immediately.
I saw all of these happymemories where we were feeding
(18:32):
horses and we were fishing, andwe were like going to the arcade
or going to a game and like Ihad suppressed all of the good
times to protect myself.
The good times weren't usefulto me when somebody can really
hurt you, so I didn't want to.
(18:53):
Just as a survival, I hadsuppressed anything that was
positive so that I knew to keepmy distance.
But by the time the meditationwas over I was just crying,
tears were coming down my face.
I called my dad and I was likeman, I forgot.
I forgot all the good times andI said I saw today that you
really did love me.
(19:14):
And then he said of course Ilove you.
And our relationship waschanged from that point forward
and we flew him to Charleston.
And we flew him back toCharleston and we were really
healed.
And it took a meditation tounlock something that I had kept
(19:36):
locked up.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
What did it feel like after you told them those words
?
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Like dude.
You know it was a total blockfor everything.
I had guarded my heart and soprobably this one relationship,
being unguarded and being open,opened up my heart to all
relationships and then I wasable to be more free, more open,
(20:04):
right?
One of the things he used totell me is men, don't cry, I'm
five, he doesn't want to hear mewhining as a five-year-old.
So I didn't cry for like 30years, and then it's only been
over the last six, seven, eightyears that I've been able to
actually experience the emotionof sadness again, and this was
(20:27):
part of that process of openingmy heart and allowing myself to
feel all the emotions.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
It's interesting how our beings are so very much
influenced by our youngestselves, and I often explain our
life as everybody's wearing abackpack.
Everybody in this world iswearing a backpack, and we're
(20:56):
often unconscious to what's inthe backpack or not aware of all
the things that we could beholding on to that aren't
serving us well, that aren'tallowing us to experience the
next level relationships or justour best version of ourselves,
(21:22):
until we really go back andunderstand and dig through, like
, okay, what is actually in here?
Actually in here.
I'll never forget the day Iforgave my dad and what was in
my backpack theoretical backpackfor 15 years at the time were
(21:43):
all the times that he came homelate, the times that there was
the infidelity with my mother,the broken promises, everything.
And how was I living my life atthat time?
I was upset, I was destructive.
(22:04):
I justified those things saying, well, I've got the quote gene,
it's just in me Because that'sthe response that he gave me.
And then I made a decision.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Yeah, I figured, I'm like oh, I just inherited a
short fuse.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
And you justify all these things.
We fabricate evidence whichwe'll get into here in a second,
and I remember I was drivingwith him.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
And I was done.
I just at that point I was likeI'm done, I'm done with holding
on to all these things and kindof recognized holy smokes.
I've got boulders in mybackpack.
No wonder I'm always upset ornot experiencing my best life.
And I said, dad, there's been alot that's happened in our
lives.
I know that you didn't mean allof it and I know that you love
(22:49):
us.
And from this point on I'mchoosing to put all of that in
the past and I forgive you.
And I remember he started andthis is making me tear up too I
remember growing up, you knowliving the life that hey, tough
guys, don't cry.
And you know he just broke downright in front of me that was
(23:12):
one of the first times I'dreally seen him just break down
like crazy, but that's one ofthe most best days of my life
too, because while some of thebehavior didn't stop after that
point, my backpack was empty andI wasn't letting anything else
in there, and I chose to justlive through love and live
(23:33):
through love versus holding onto the past.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
You said a really important thing there.
You said a really importantthing.
The behavior didn't change.
His behavior didn't change andmy dad's didn't either, but I
changed and that was the point.
The point was that you had yourtransformation.
(23:56):
You became a loving, forgivingversion of yourself, and that
was your mission as a littlesoul, and if he chooses to
change or not, that's up to him.
You forgiving.
This is a lot of times whereforgiveness can go wrong for the
person listening.
We were like well, I forgaveyou now I need you to be better.
(24:21):
It doesn't matter how they are,because forgiveness isn't really
a gift for them, and it's alsonot like letting them off the
hook.
It's just releasing thebackpack, as you said, from
yourself forgiveness is a gift.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
Yeah, forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves.
That's a great way to put it,and on that, I also see
forgiveness as something thatcan be a skill.
You talk about happiness as askill that is developed.
I remember growing up thinkingthat happiness is this emotion
(24:56):
that we choose.
And happiness sometimes myantiquated thinking was I had
the when I, then I syndrome,when I achieve X condition, then
I will be happier.
When all this junk at homestops, then I'll be happy.
What's some context behind.
(25:18):
Happiness is a skill, and howhave you cultivated that skill
in your life now?
What does that look like Now?
What does that look like?
Discipline is a key componentof this podcast and a key thing
that we preach.
We view discipline as the fuelto help you create the life that
(25:44):
you ultimately desire, anddiscipline being the fuel that
gets your habits and systems incheck so that you can actually
accomplish your goals.
If you're looking to level upin 2025, I am happy to be a part
of that and encourage you tojoin the Unshakable Discipline
Mastermind Group.
This has been my baby for acouple years and we're finally
(26:11):
launching it here in 2025.
The group consists of aself-paced course that teaches
you how to form core habits andmindset that will allow you to
accomplish your goals.
A daily accountability channelto keep you on track, motivated
and in alignment with ourmembers, and weekly mastermind
sessions where you're going tolearn from either myself or a
suite of renowned guests manywho have been on the podcast
(26:35):
that are going to share piecesof their winning playbooks
directly with you.
I've learned that being a partof groups over the years has
helped propel me to so many newlevels in life.
If you want to go fast, goalone.
If you want to go far, then gotogether, and it's my wish that
(26:58):
the Unshakeable Crew is a choicethat makes sense for you in
2025.
We are growing up to 100 membersthis year and have limited time
founding member pricing for 12more folks before we permanently
increase pricing to $97 a month.
(27:18):
You can get in now for $67 amonth, locked in for life, and
be a part of the adventure thatwe're creating with our members.
If you're somebody that cravesdiscipline, seeks it or wants it
this year, and you're reallycommitted to making lasting
changes in your life and beingaround others that are committed
(27:41):
to winning and serving theworld and sharing what they
learn with others so that wemake this world a better place,
then join the Unshakeable crew.
Go to unshakabledisciplinecomand you can sign up.
It is also in the show notesUnshakeable shake as in
(28:01):
milkshakeunshakabledisciplinecom, and
we're excited to have you in2025.
Let's go.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
It takes a lot of effort and nothing's worth more
effort because we're happy toput in a bunch of effort at work
.
All right, I'm going to work mytail off.
I'm going to do my best I canin my career and I'll work eight
to 10 hours a day for 40 yearson this career.
We're happy to put an effortthere.
Or we'll put an effort in ourphysical body.
(28:39):
I'm going to go to the gym orI'm going to go for a run and
I'm going to do this five or sixdays a week because I want to
be in peak physical condition.
And yet we think we're justsupposed to naturally be happy.
The mental health piece, wejust think, oh, we're just
supposed to have that, itdoesn't take any effort, that's
just a given.
I should just have that.
But it's exactly the same asdeveloping your skills at work
(29:02):
and it's exactly the same asdeveloping your physical skills
and it takes just as much effort.
But I'll argue that developingour happiness is the master
skill that unlocks all the otherones, because it's proven.
Many scientific studies haveshown that happy employees earn
more money.
Happy salespeople are liketwice as productive.
(29:26):
And, by the way, who wants abunch of money if you're
miserable anyway, it doesn'teven matter, like that, you're
miserable.
So or or, who needs a perfectbody if your relationships are
all falling apart?
You know?
So happiness is the skill to,to develop.
(29:47):
And uh, just this morning I wokeup and I and I had, I could
just feel negativity, and ittook me an hour with a journal.
It took me an hour with ajournal to figure out what
negative thoughts were there,because they weren't obvious and
they weren't apparent and thento reframe them to.
(30:09):
First I had to get the, andthere ended up being five
negative thoughts I could comeup with, and I put them all down
on a piece of paper and then Iworked on each one and thought,
okay, well, how else could I seethis?
Could I see this differently?
And then, is there any action Ishould take from this?
Because all negative thoughts Icall them bad moods in the book
, but they're not bad, they'regood.
(30:31):
All negative thoughts are tryingto do something helpful for us.
It's our brain trying to helpus.
The negative thoughts don'tserve no purpose.
They're not there to harm us,they're there to help us.
It's just like if you touch astove and your hand burns and it
hurts, that pain is helpful.
So all this pain, thisemotional pain, is really
helpful too.
It's saying hey, watch out,there's something here you need
(30:56):
to do, there's something youhave to address here, that's all
.
This negative thoughts are is ahelpful nudge to do something
different or to see things adifferent way.
But that took an hour of timeand I'm sure the person
listening is going to say Idon't have an hour of time.
Well, it took me from 4.30 amto 5.30 am.
Have an hour of time.
Well, it took me from 4.30 amto 5.30 am.
(31:16):
And because I purposefullyallow myself this kind of space
without my phone, my phone's onairplane mode and without having
any other things to do, Ididn't have to take care of my
kids.
I do the gym later.
I was taking my mom after I didthe kids, so I was able to get
all this done before the kidswoke up, before I did all their
lunches, before I ended uptaking them to school, before I
had coffee with my mom, before Itook her to the car shop and
(31:37):
then before I went to the gymand then before I hadn't done it
.
If I didn't have that space, Icould have been grumpy with my
kids or standoffish, and thenthey could have been in a bad
mood and then they could havegone into school, and then they
(32:01):
could have gotten in trouble,maybe because they just weren't
feeling great, and maybe Iwouldn't have been that cool to
my mom, and then the two of uscould have been cold with each
other.
Maybe Katie and I could havegotten into it Like who knows.
But instead I took all thatnegativity, worked on it,
changed it and then by the timeI saw my kids man, we were
having a blast, like we had thebest morning, and Katie started
(32:23):
to lose it a little bit becauseshe's potty training our
three-year-old boy and he's notpicking up what she's putting
down and he continues to notbody train and she's, she's
feeling a bunch of pressure,which is a negative thought, by
the way.
Um, I didn't tell her that butthe pressure, the pressure is
not necessary.
(32:44):
We can.
And that's one of the chapters,the chapter on joy.
Uh, so, but joy.
But my mood was so high that Iwas able to sustain a place for
her when she was falling thisafternoon and be like, hey, we
got this together.
She's like, well, hey, couldyou go get Kelly?
And I said I've got the space,Let me go get Kelly.
(33:06):
And I went and got Kelly andshe got a chance to take a
shower and actually take care ofherself.
All because I spent an hour toget rid of the negativity was I
able to truly serve my wife and,what's more important For me, I
told you relationships are mynumber one, so it's worth the
effort.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Can we dig into that a little more, that someone
listening might be thinking okay, I woke up with some negative
thoughts this morning as well,and is there a certain construct
, is there certain questionsthat we should be asking
ourselves about these negativethoughts or bad moods that we
may be having, so that we canwork towards understanding?
(33:46):
Okay, what is the good thatit's giving us?
As you mentioned, there's goodthat can be extracted, so what's
something that we can do as apractical exercise to follow
your lead here?
Speaker 1 (34:03):
absolutely the.
The number one tool in ourhappiness toolkit is a journal,
and my journal process is fivesteps and it's and the first
step is negative thoughts.
Some days I don't have any andI I get to my journal and I'm
like I feel good, like Iactually feel amazing.
(34:25):
So negative thoughts that's nota thing on those days and
that's like maybe four or five,even six days out of seven, but
at least one out of seven, atleast one, and for me and this
is all I do, I'm a happinesscoach At least one out of seven.
There are negative thoughtsthat I have to address.
But I start there.
I start my.
(34:50):
The journal process is you sitdown, I have a cup of coffee,
because coffee makes me feelgood, and I'm sipping my coffee
and I'm just searching my mind.
Are there any negative thoughts?
And so my first negativethought was I'm disconnected
from the people at my office.
I wrote it down I'm feelingdisconnected from the people in
my office.
And then the next negativethought was I made a selfish
(35:11):
choice with my daughter.
I chose to put a surgery justbefore her big cheer competition
.
I'm selfish.
And then the next negativethought I don't know if I'm
going to be able to think of allfive.
Speaker 2 (35:23):
That's fine, that helps, yeah, just basic.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
These are two good examples.
These are our first two, butbefore I started to fix them all
and this is a really importantthing get all the negativity out
.
One day I went through and Isaid, man, my face is ugly, but
I wrote it down.
And that was just one of thenegative, negative thoughts that
I had.
Doesn't matter if it's true ornot, doesn't even matter if it's
(35:50):
harsh.
Another thing Another day, onthat same day, I said I was a
douchebag to my friend Brewer.
So I was calling myself a nameRight and you want to write like
the real stuff, write the realstuff.
If douchebag is in yourvernacular, in your negative
thoughts, write that down.
Don't clean it up, don't churchit up, just write down whatever
(36:15):
the negativity is, because it'sin there.
If you try to filter thenegativity, it still stays in
there.
I see this as a chance to dumpthe backpack onto the page.
Then, once I got them all outand I've got five of them there
then the next step is okay, howcan I reframe these?
So, going to the first one, itwas I feel disconnected with the
(36:39):
people in my company and thatcan be bad, because if I'm
disconnected, I own a realestate companyents can leave and
they do all the time.
It's like a pretty highturnover, high turnover position
.
And so I just reframed it.
And my reframe was we're moreconnected this year than we've
(37:00):
ever been, which is a truth.
We've been more focused onone-on-one lunches and creating
a really empowering environment.
Trainings I brought on allthese different trainers, I
started to list them out andthen I asked myself is there any
action I could take?
And I said here's what I'mgoing to do.
(37:20):
I'm going to text every one ofthem today individually.
And so I wrote that down as anaction text every person in my
company.
And then the next negativethought was I made a selfish
decision with my daughter.
I scheduled a surgery the daybefore her cheer competition
because it was the opening thatwas coming up next and that
means I might not see the firstday of her cheer competition.
(37:41):
I was just feeling selfishabout that and I reframed it and
I said well, I'm going to seeher second day of the cheer
competition and every singlenight I spend time every single
night right now helping her withher cheer routine, like nightly
before she goes to bed.
Her and I work on this cheerroutine that she's doing and I
(38:05):
just said I'm not selfish withmy daughter, I'm giving her
everything I've got, and I wrotedown action Is there any action
I can take here?
And the answer was no.
I just needed to see that, eventhough I felt selfish, I
actually had counterpoints thatsaid I wasn't selfish in this
arena.
And so the counter like whenyou write the reframe next to
(38:26):
the negative thought I justfigure it like it neutralizes it
.
It's like maybe you know, whenwe go camping and you get some
water and it might have somebacteria in it, but you can put
some iodine or some pills in itand it neutralizes the stuff
that can harm you and then youcan drink the water and it's
clean.
That's kind of how I see thesenegative thoughts.
Speaker 2 (38:49):
I love the simplicity of it and one thing that's
interesting is you know youreference Byron Katie's work a
good bit in Good Mood Revolutionand I just got her book as well
.
It got recommended from a recentpodcast guest Absolute
masterclass and one of the keyquestions that she poses is what
(39:13):
makes a thought true?
We can often fabricate evidencethat we are selfish or that we
are disconnected and completelydisregard the evidence that we
have manufactured that.
No, actually we're way furtheralong because of all the things
(39:35):
that we've done to have teambuilding events or all of the
nights that you've spent withyour daughter.
It's easy sometimes for us tofabricate evidence and ignore
what we've manufactured, andthis goes into really the power
that we possess.
I was listening to a recentpodcast episode you had on Good
(39:56):
Mood Revolution and you weretalking about belief systems and
how you previously struggledwith maybe things such as I'm
not worthy or maybe I am aterrible boss.
What are some beliefs that youfound yourself often fabricating
(40:17):
evidence for that you had towork on the hardest to shift, to
develop the sense of confidencethat you have today and the
confidence that you possess andbring to the table in every
endeavor that you go on.
Speaker 1 (40:37):
Yeah, in the book I talk about the eight bad moods,
and there's only eight.
Every single negative feelingwe can ever have falls into one
of the eight buckets of badmoods and those are shame, which
was my biggest one.
It was what we started thisepisode with I feel unlovable or
unworthy of love, and that wasa linchpin lie.
(41:00):
It was a lie and that onebelief from that stemmed like
maybe thousands of other beliefs.
And then I had all thisevidence that was pointing to
the fact that I really wasunlovable or unworthy of love.
And then I had to prove that Iwas and that was useful.
(41:20):
Again, it was my mind helpingme.
At least my mind thought it washelping me.
My mind was like, oh, do moreand do more and do more.
And it thought, then you'll be,finally, you'll be worthy of
love and then you'll haveeverything you want.
But it never was going to workbecause I had this linchpin
belief I was unlovable.
As soon as I was able to turnthat around and pull that
linchpin because it wasn't eventrue the whole belief structure
(41:42):
just crumbled and I found thetruth, which was I, was that
beautiful little soul that wasthe light of the world, and that
it was just a cloak of darkness.
It wasn't even true.
And this is what's neat aboutdarkness as soon as you shine
the light on it, it wasn't.
It's not even there, likenothing needs to happen.
All you need to do is turn onthe light and the darkness goes
away.
So that was a major negativebelief.
(42:06):
But I've had all eight of them,and so the next negative belief
is guilt, and guilt says peopledeserve to be punished for the
things they do wrong.
That's a big one, and, man,look at all the political
campaigns that go on and it'sall this guilt-driven content.
(42:27):
I was raised in a Catholicfamily, catholic.
There's a lot of guilt there.
I had to go into a tiny roomwith a man who told me to tell
him everything I'd done wrong,and then he told me that I had
to repent for all the things I'ddone wrong.
It was ingrained and I had allthis evidence that I just need
to be punished all the time.
Well, that also is a superdestructive belief, and as soon
(42:48):
as I pulled that linchpin outthat people deserve punishment
for doing things wrong andreplaced it with a truer truth,
which is if you do things wrong,there's consequences, but no
more punishment is required.
The consequence was enough andthere's always a consequence,
because karma is absolute.
Like says, every single hair iscounted, so everything that we
(43:12):
do, good or bad.
This is why integrity is soimportant.
Why it's so important to me isthat every single deed is
recorded by the universe.
So you get away with nothing,even if you think you got away
with something, but you don'tdeserve.
You know there's no punishment,there's just a consequence, and
the consequence is meant toteach you and you don't need to
be punished beyond that.
So those are two really big,important beliefs and anyone
(43:35):
listening needs to know likethose need to be.
Those are two cornerstonebeliefs to change.
The next one is the lie thatlife is hopeless, that the
future is hopeless.
If you're in that man, the onlything you can do is get help,
because once you fall into thislie that the future is hopeless,
(43:59):
that we can't do anything,we're overwhelmed by the demands
of life.
We truly believe there's nohope, so we need someone else to
help us.
So if you're in that, findsomeone.
They'll help you.
Ryan will help you, I'll helpyou.
Just reach out.
Life is never hopeless.
And then you get into thisbelief of fear that bad things
(44:19):
can happen to me in the futureand we can just stay in anxiety
like all these bad things arecoming.
That's kind of what was goingon this morning.
There was a fear that I pulledout of myself that I was
disconnected from my company andthat people could leave.
That was good man, that wasactually a good nudge.
(44:39):
I did text every single personindividually in my company and
had a ton of great conversationsand connected with some people
and somebody's dad was justgiven a bad diagnosis and I was
able to get on the phone withthem and, like, really be there
with them and and you know the,the fear that I was disconnected
led to once I found it andwrote it down, led to an action
(45:02):
to make me connected and it wasreally powerful.
But what typically we do is wedon't have time to deal with
these beliefs or these thoughts,and so we got this underlying
fear that we're disconnected orsomething, that our job is in
jeopardy or whatever, and wejust don't write it down or
figure it out and then it juststays there.
And then another fear shows uplike I'm selfish, and then that
(45:24):
one stays there that mydaughter's not going to like me
and all these other fears, andthey just compound.
And all of a sudden, you justfind out that you're anxious.
You're like I don't know why,but I've got anxiety.
Well, it's because you've beenignoring every single fear and
not dealing with it and thentaking appropriate action.
The fear is helpful and um, butwe have to figure it out and we
(45:44):
have to figure out what itwants us to do.
It's it's not there to harm us,it's there to help us.
So those are some bigcornerstone beliefs for me that
I was able to to figure out andturn around.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
I love the fact that, even with the we call them bad
moods, they deliver.
They're there to deliversomething good and another thing
that it's.
It's not referenced exactlylike this in the book, but it
makes me refer back to aconversation I had with Chris
Doris, who is the mentaltoughness coach, works with a
(46:14):
lot of PGA athletes andmentioned Byron Katie's work to
me.
Chris, in his mental toughnessmantras, says it ain't bad, it
is.
You know, life is like it'sjust, life just is.
And from there, you know, we,we choose our state or we work
(46:35):
towards our state.
There's eight bad moods.
What do you do to ensure thatthe good moods stay on top and
the good moods stay winning andwe keep the bad moods out of
(46:55):
play?
It doesn't mean the bad moodsare never going to come into
play.
You mentioned that they cameinto play this morning, but we
can also feed.
From what I interpret this workto be, we can feed the good
moods a heck of a lot more andstay on top.
So what's some context you canprovide there to keep the good
moods flowing and ignited morethan our bad moods?
Speaker 1 (47:24):
Yeah, so I'll finish with the journal process,
because that it's we become thethings we do repeatedly.
And uh, step three on myjournal process once I come up
with any negative thoughts ifthere are any, and then reframe
them is I write down threethings I win at, three things
(47:44):
from the day before that werewins, and usually I end up with
four or five, but some days I'vestruggled to come up with three
things that I did well the daybefore.
But this is a really powerfulprocess because again it goes
back to that guilt this I'm notdoing enough, I'm not good
(48:09):
enough.
Once we start to and that'scoming from a powerful place too
because our mind is like domore, do more, do more.
It'll be helpful for you,you'll survive more, you'll
stack more money and if anythinghappens, you'll have money and
you can pay for it.
You'll be and you'll be okay.
So it's not trying to hurt us,but what?
What it does is the mind'salways looking at what are we
not doing right so we could fixit, because it needs to be fixed
(48:33):
.
But what it doesn't do, this issuper crazy man.
It doesn't tell us what isgoing well unless we ask it.
And we have to ask it what isgoing well?
Consciously, because if it'sgoing well, like, go back to us
living in tribes in the SavannahIf it was going well, we didn't
(48:55):
need to spend energy on it,because it took all of our
energy to go, get food andsurvive and not do things wrong
or not get kicked out of thetribe or not say the wrong thing
.
So the brain only spent itsenergy on what wasn't going well
, because if it was going well,great, you got that covered, I
don't need energy on it.
Well now, dude, grocery storehas all the food we need, we're
(49:15):
all living, we're all surviving.
We don't need to be thatvigilant over survival at this
moment, and so we have to feedour brain with positivity, and I
do that by writing down threethings that went well the day
before.
This doesn't seem like it's abig deal, but it changes
everything.
What happens is throughout theday.
My mind now keeps an open filefor what I'm doing right,
(49:40):
because it knows it has tocollect what I'm doing right and
keep it in stored memory sothat the next day it doesn't
take me too long to figure outwhat I did right the day before.
Well then, it's like in themoment that I did something
right, it's like, oh, you justdid that right.
And I'm like, heck, yeah, I did.
And I get this hit of dopaminethat I feel good about it.
The next day when I write itdown, I get the hit of dopamine
(50:02):
again and I feel good about it,get the hit of dopamine again
and I feel good about it.
And then, instead of seeingeverything that everyone's doing
wrong, I start to seeeverything everyone's doing
right.
I'm like, oh, they're doingthat right and they're doing
that right, and they're doingthat right.
And I start affirming how greateverybody is and they're like,
oh man, thank you, and it's notlike BS, because I actually am
noticing what they're doingright and I'm excited about it
(50:22):
because I've trained my mind tobe excited about what's going
right.
And then they feel really good.
And then they turn around, theytreat me really good, and then
all my relationships areflourishing and I'm like it's
just this huge upward spiral,all from just writing down three
things you did well the daybefore.
So super powerful habit, and itis probably the cornerstone for
me of why I'm such a positiveperson right now.
(50:47):
The last two things I do on thisfive-step process is, I do
write down three brand newthings I'm grateful for three
things I've never written before.
And it's the same concept.
Gratitude can become a chore ifit's like oh okay, I'm grateful
for my wife, I'm grateful formy kids, I'm grateful for our
health.
Well then, it's just boring androte.
(51:07):
But I wait in the morning andI'm like what are three new
things I'm grateful for?
I've been doing this for like13 years, every single day.
I don't know how many days thatis, but it sounds like a lot
Like 40,000 days times three120,000 new things.
I've had to find 120,000 newthings I'm grateful for.
(51:30):
You would think after the firstthousand you would run out right
.
But then you find out you canactually be grateful for every
single thing the challenges, thethings that didn't go right,
the smile somebody gave you theday before, the fact that you
were up late helping yourdaughter with cheerleading.
You could just be grateful forall of it.
And you're like, wow, thishabit now makes you grateful for
(51:53):
all of life.
And, as you started thisepisode out, gratitude is the
gateway to all positivity.
And then I end the fifth step,and I got this from Tony
Robbins' priming and I writedown actually this came
originally.
It came from Grant Cardone andI can't remember which book, but
(52:15):
he said write your goals, yourtop life goals, as if they're
already achieved, until they'reachieved every day.
And I started doing that.
I think it was this first book,the 10X Rule, that I read that
in, and I started to just writemy top goals as if they were
achieved, every single day,until they were achieved.
I haven't stopped, because whathappened is everything I
(52:37):
started to write down every daycame true, and I'm like this
might be the cheat code to haveanything I want in life come
true and guess what it is.
So if there's anything I want,I wrote down every single day.
I write a bestselling book.
I wrote it down every day forfour years because when I first
(53:00):
started to write it I didn'tbelieve it.
Like who would want to read abook about happiness from a guy
that runs a real estate company?
There was so much impostersyndrome.
But then I wrote it down fouryears, every single day for four
years, again, 1,200 times, Iwrite a bestselling book on my
(53:21):
page.
Then the book hit in Decemberand was a bestseller in seven
different categories on Amazonand was the first book to a
hundred reviews, like thefastest book to a hundred
reviews in Forbes history.
And it was.
Is it because I wrote it down amillion times?
You bet your butt Like it wasbecause I wrote it down all
those times.
So I end my journal process bywriting my top three life goals
(53:46):
as if they're already achieved.
Until they're achieved.
Speaker 2 (53:48):
Greatness happens twice.
It happens in your mind first,and then in reality.
And if we can't see the thingwhether it's the bestselling
book or the family that weultimately envision, the sub
three hour marathon, whatever Ifyou can't see it upstairs in
your mind, then you're likelynot going to see it right in
(54:14):
front of your very eyes becauseyou're not awake to the
possibilities.
Was there a certain turningpoint along the journey of
writing?
I wrote a bestselling book forfour years that you start to
actually believe it.
Like you mentioned, impostersyndrome, Was it okay?
Maybe the first week you'relike man, this is BS, there's no
(54:35):
way.
And then was it coupled?
with something, I would imagine,a series of actions, maybe when
you actually first startedwriting the book that you're
like huh, you know what?
No, I can do this, I am doingthis.
What did that look like?
Speaker 1 (54:56):
I wrote it every day for a year with nothing, no
action.
I didn't even know what thebook was going to be about and I
was just.
I was a CEO of a like, like,massively growing company, with
three babies and a new marriage,and I was trying to hold it all
(55:18):
together.
And yet I had this vision Iwrite this bestselling book.
And it just wasn't.
But I continued to write itdown because it was important to
me.
But I wasn't believing.
I'm like, yeah, maybe when I'm50, like it'll show up someday.
And then I went to a businessconference in Colorado and I'm
(55:39):
going skiing with my buddies andthis dude comes up and he's
like, oh, hey, man, I'll jump inwith you guys.
And he gets on the lift andhe's sitting next to me and it's
a four times New York Timesbestselling author, a guy named
Tucker Max.
And I had read Tucker's bookswhen I was in college.
They were crude and funny andwe would listen to the audio CDs
(56:00):
, driving the string break andstuff, and I knew who he was.
I was like, oh, dude, man, yourbooks are so funny.
He said, oh, yeah, I appreciateit.
I've changed a lot since then.
I said, okay, cool man.
I'm like what are you doing now?
He said well, now I helpauthors publish their books.
And I said that's crazy.
I'm supposed to write a book.
And he said tell me about yourbook.
(56:21):
And I gave him a vague idea,because at this point I'd been
writing it for a year that Iwrite this bestselling book.
I said it's going to be abouthow to not be in a bad mood.
And he said I want to read thatbook.
And he said you should get intouch with my company.
And he gave me the contactinformation and that's what I
did.
I reached out to his companyand they needed like $17,000,
(56:45):
which was, you know, it's a bigsum of money.
And I'm like I had written downI write a bestselling book so
many times.
And then the encounter with thisguy who helps people write
books on a chairlift randomlyDidn't feel random.
It felt like divine guidance,and so I committed On the call.
(57:05):
I said here's $17,000.
And I gave them this huge chunkof money and then I don't know
if I talked to Katie first ornot, but either way, I was so
committed because I had writtenthe goal so many times, that
then I was ready for theopportunity when it showed up
and they had a process and theirprocess was amazing about how
(57:27):
to write a book if you've neverwritten a book, so that it's
going to be good.
And I got on a call with Tuckerand he said, matt, if your book
sucks, it's going to hurt you,so your book can't suck.
It's going to hurt you, so yourbook can't suck.
That put a lot of pressure onme, but it was also good for me.
(57:49):
So I spent four years writingit.
It took me four years because Iwrote it probably seven
different times.
Every chapter was reworked atleast seven times.
It ended up being 500 pages andthrough the process of
rewriting and editing I got itdown to 165 pages of the most
powerful stuff.
And that was based on Tucker'scomment to me if you write a bad
(58:13):
book, it's going to hurt you.
And writing a really good booktakes a ton of effort, and so I
just put in a ton of effort andthis is a great book, matt, and
it's a masterclass.
Speaker 2 (58:22):
Matt, what do you wish to ignite with the Good
Mood Revolution and I use igniteintentionally this time,
because it's right there on thecover of the book and you make
reference to the match that isnot only on the front cover, but
on the chapter pages.
What is Good Mood Revolutionintended to ignite in the lives
(58:48):
and minds of readers?
Speaker 1 (58:54):
Yeah, man, it's a revolution because we've got the
, we've got these, we got thenegative piece right, we've got
this piece of us that thatbelieves all these negative
thoughts and and and then.
But we don't want to stay there, and so it's almost like a
battle within ourselves to findthe positivity.
(59:15):
But what I want to like, my bigvision of it right now, is uh,
I want to, I want to help theworld be happier, and you can
only do that with you.
Know I.
I could say that's alreadyaccomplished because people
every single week are writing meand telling me that they've
become happier.
So I've got a quantifiable goalI want to help, um, I want to
(59:37):
have 100,000 engaged YouTubesubscribers that I'm helping
live a happier life, and that'sthe vision right now.
I want to ignite happiness in100,000 people's lives in an
engaged, regular way, because Ifigure that's a big round number
.
It's also a number I wrote downfour years ago, when I started
(59:58):
writing the book, on a piece ofpaper that I would have 100,000
people that were following meand feeling better about this
thing.
But man, think about those100,000 people know people, and
then those people know peopleand those people know people.
The whole world can becomehappier.
Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
if you've affected other people, world can become
happier if you, if you'veaffected other people.
And Matt, how do we bestsupport you along that journey?
And obviously subscribe to theYouTube channel, but what are
the other ways that we can be ofbest support and service to you
and your mission?
Speaker 1 (01:00:34):
Man, you're doing it, bro.
Just your friendship means theworld to me.
Man, you're somebody thatinspires the heck out of me and
I'm excited for everythingyou're doing.
It, bro.
Just your friendship means theworld to me.
Man, you're somebody thatinspires the heck out of me and
I'm excited for everythingyou're doing on your work making
the world more focused and moredisciplined and understanding
that they can accomplishanything that they think that
they can accomplish.
That message is really powerfuland it's really needed.
(01:00:55):
I appreciate your friendship.
Speaker 2 (01:00:56):
I'm encouraging everyone to keep up with Matt
and buy Good Mood Revolution.
Listen to Good Mood Revolutionanywhere that you have podcasts,
but preferably on YouTube, matt, it's customary to end the
podcast with a rapid firesession, and the way this works
is we're going to have lunch ata cool rooftop in Charleston and
(01:01:18):
we're going up three elevatorfloors and a person is going to
step in an elevator and go upone floor and they recognize you
, they've read the book, they'velistened to the pod and they're
going to ask you one question.
So the amount of time you haveto answer is the amount of time
it takes to go up one elevator,one elevator floor.
So if you're ready, then herewe go.
This is one gem, one step, onebook.
(01:01:41):
So we get on.
Someone hops on with us.
They say Matt man.
I've read Good Mid-Revolution.
It's such a great book.
What's one gem that you have,whether it be a quote or a
mantra that you live your lifeby, that I can put in my back
pocket and live my life by?
Speaker 1 (01:02:00):
I can put in my back pocket and live my life by.
Yeah, you want to love yourselfevery moment that you can and
whenever possible.
When you're looking at someoneor talking with someone, picture
them surrounded by love as well.
Speaker 2 (01:02:13):
That person just got off and another person hopped on
Matt.
I love Good Moon Revolution.
Another person hopped on Matt.
I love good mood revolution.
What's one step that I can taketoday to achieve a good mood in
my life?
Speaker 1 (01:02:31):
The easiest step is gratitude, and it has to be a
ritual, it has to be a habit.
So we usually eat three times aday.
I recommend just saying a quickprayer before your meal and
saying thank you for this meal,thank you for this life, thank
you for everything that I havegoing for me, amen.
(01:02:51):
And then we start to eat, andit's everyone eats and we eat
multiple times a day.
This takes a few seconds andyou were anchoring this
gratitude habit to something youalready do.
Speaker 2 (01:03:02):
Going back to the beginning, gratitude is the
gateway to good mood.
The last one, which may be themost difficult for someone
that's as well-read as you, matt.
What's one book, in addition toGood Mood Revolution, that we
should read in 2025 to improveour mindsets?
Speaker 1 (01:03:25):
I love the surrender experiment.
In that book Michael Singertells his life story about how
everything that was happening tohim that he didn't like he knew
was sent by a higher power,kind of like Tucker Max getting
(01:03:48):
on that ski lift with me.
The book ends with him goingthrough the most excruciating
thing that he could imagine andagain it was sent to him to help
him.
He was in Charleston, southCarolina.
Actually the Supreme Court ofthe United States was sentencing
him to a life in prison becausehe had been framed.
His company was WebMD.
He had been framed forembezzling money by one of his
(01:04:08):
employees and while he waswaiting for his sentence it was
like a four or five year trial.
He lost his company.
He had built it from his owngarage.
It was worth billions ofdollars that had been taken from
him.
They had seized all of hisassets and uh and he wrote the
book the untethered soul, whichhas changed the lives of
(01:04:32):
millions of people at this pointand helped them live happier.
And uh, that's the point of thesurrender experiment.
Is that everything that'shappening to you in your life is
not happening to you.
Speaker 2 (01:04:42):
Things don't happen to us, they happen for us and
that's a first time this bookhas been recommended on the pod,
so appreciate that we could addthat into the repository matt.
It's been such an amazingconversation and thank you for
how you choose to serve theworld and for how you're serving
the world, your family, beingan inspiration and igniting a
(01:05:08):
good mood, revolution, so thatwe can experience our best
selves and win today.
Thanks so much you.
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