May 26, 2025 • 27 mins
You already have the answers, but you might not have the path. Or you know the path but can't help bumps in the road from turning into mountains.
Feeling stuck, frustrated, or unsure of your next step? This episode introduces three powerful questions that can help you break through doubt, gain clarity, and turn challenges into growth. As midyear fatigue sets in, these tools will help you realign with your purpose and stay focused on what truly matters.
These 3 questions can be asked regularly to avoid setbacks, create clarity, and continue moving forward in any situation.
Thank you for tuning in! If you feel led, please subscribe & share the show to others who you believe would benefit from it.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to the Wednesday podcast, a weekly
resource thoughtfully crafted tohelp people build and refine
discipline, accomplish theirgoals, fortify their mindsets
and be of service to somebody inthis world.
My name is Ryan Cass and I amyour host, and it is my mission
and commitment to deliveramazing episodes to you every
week where you'll learn frommyself or renowned expert in
(00:26):
their field.
We love helping people win inevery aspect of their lives, and
you can help us win by sharingthe show with somebody that you
believe will benefit from it,subscribing and leaving a rating
and review.
We believe that everybody inthis world is meant to do
something great with their livesand we're here to help play a
(00:47):
role in that.
Thank you for tuning in andlet's win today.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
The power is in you, the answer is in you and you are
the answer to all your searches.
The answer to all your searches, you are the goal, you are the
answer.
It's never outside EckhartTolle.
(01:19):
Eckhart Tolle is a well-knownauthor and spiritual
psychologist mindset coach,renowned for helping people
identify what's already withinthemselves to move forward, has
a lot of amazing quotes, and, aswe're now approaching the
halfway point in the year, Ilove to bring back some tips
(01:41):
that are often referenced at thebeginning of the year, some
tips that are often referencedat the beginning of the year.
This is the time where theweather's getting warmer, people
are and this is statisticallyproven becoming a little less
focused on their goals,especially now with vacations
coming up, and I love to provideresources to help people stay
(02:04):
as focused as possible andenable them to be successful.
That opening quote was bydesign, in that we already have
all of the answers that we needwithin us, answers that we need
(02:30):
within us.
I think about this when Iresearch a lot of well-renowned
coaches, especially guys like EdMilet or Brennan Burchard, who
have business backgrounds bytrade, yet they're coaching
athletes, they're coachingentrepreneurs and industries
that they have no experience in.
They're coaching doctors,astronauts, people that are
(02:54):
completely outside of theirrealm, and I remember first
thinking, well, what are theycoaching them on?
How can they possibly be?
Well, what are they coachingthem on?
How can they possibly becoaching them?
As if this is a sports-typerelationship, where Ed Milet
isn't going to tell MichaelChandler, who's one of his UFC
(03:16):
clients, when to throw a punch,when to throw a hard left versus
a right uppercut.
So what is he actually doing?
And he's really helping him inthis case, michael, one of the
greatest UFC fighters out thereright now explore what's already
(03:40):
within himself.
So think about that withinhimself.
So think about that.
Some of the most well-renownedcoaches in the world, even Tony
Robbins, who has worked withpeople in every profession,
industry, world leaders, thingsthat he has no actual experience
(04:01):
in, yet he can coach people onit.
He's not giving the how-tos.
The how-to for life alreadyresides within you, and one way
that we can understand that andsee what's in us or create the
(04:25):
pathway to go where we desire,is by asking ourselves the right
questions, and this is whatthis episode is about.
Today.
There are three questions thathave completely changed my life,
many of which well, a couple ofwhich I reference in this
(04:48):
podcast frequently, because Ibelieve that these three
questions we're going to go overtoday aren't just three
questions that you ask yourselfonce and then.
It's like an inventory or achecklist and you're good, you
don't need to ask them anymorebecause it gave you an answer or
clarity in that moment and nowthat's it.
(05:11):
As beings, we are constantlyevolving and what is important
to us or meaningful us todaymight not be important to you or
as meaningful one year from now, two years from now, six months
from now, depending on how lifechanges.
(05:32):
Life on average as an adultchanges 38 plus times.
An adult goes through 38 plusmajor life changes after turning
18 years old.
I remember that from aninterview with Brad Stahlberg at
the beginning of last yeargoing over his book Master of
Change.
(05:52):
So the answers and the claritythat we want can be extracted by
asking ourselves the rightquestions, and that's what these
well-renowned coaches do andthe people like the Eckhart
Tolle with the opening quoteremind us of is that, hey, I'm
(06:15):
not going to tell you how to goand be a doctor.
If that's what you want to doand maybe you're unsure, I'm
going to ask you the rightquestions that are going to help
you chart the course that youknow you need to go on in order
to achieve that thing.
Now, the questions that we'regoing to pose here are more so
(06:39):
intended for for keeping youmoving forward, regardless of
what you may encounter along theway.
So there's a whole set ofquestions that can help you
identify your path, but thequestions we're posing here are
ones that, once you're on yourpath, or once you and when you
(07:04):
encounter some sort of roadblock, this will keep you moving
forward versus set you back.
And an example of that in thefirst question, I believe, one
that I asked myself countlesstimes personally, professionally
, in a variety of fashions whatmakes this true?
(07:26):
What makes this true?
What makes this true?
Another way you can look atthis question is what evidence
do I have right now?
But go back.
What makes this true Now?
What's the context behind that?
We often can have a thoughtabout not being capable enough,
(07:48):
not being good enough.
That voice of doubt visits themost resilient people in the
world when you study them andlisten to them.
Even people like David Goggins,people think now or many people
may think that, for asresilient as he is and for
everything that he's gonethrough that.
(08:09):
He has found a way topermanently conquer the voice of
doubt, and it never visits himanymore, or else he wouldn't be
able to do all these things.
That man wakes up in themorning, just like you and I do.
That man wakes up in themorning, just like you and I do,
(08:36):
goes downstairs, or however hishouse is laid out, but goes
down and looks at his workoutgear, just like you and I do,
not wanting to put it on,wanting to jump back in bed,
believing that he's not capableof doing whatever it is that
he's going after.
And the difference maker is,even when those voices visit, he
(08:56):
doesn't buy into the story, orwe can easily buy into the story
that then prevents us fromdoing the very thing that we
know is most useful or mostbeneficial to getting us to
where we want to go.
We can buy into this narrativethat prevents us from exploring,
(09:23):
or rather, prevents us fromcreating the answer that's
already inside of us, becausewe're allowing this narrative to
stop us.
An example of that, andsomething that completely
changed the game for me after Iattended a personal development
(09:47):
course in 2021.
My mom, who I love to death,even at 32 years old now,
doesn't matter where I'm going.
I could be going on a businesstrip.
I could be going to a friend'shouse.
She will always ask somethingalong the lines of well, did you
(10:09):
bring a jacket, if she knowsthe training?
Did you bring gloves?
Did you feed the dog?
And what I used to hear when allshe was doing was looking out
for me, is you're nottrustworthy, you're uncapable,
(10:34):
you're like a little kid, you'renot an adult.
That's what I would hear andthat's the narrative that I
created that my own mom doesn'ttrust me and doesn't believe
that I'm capable of doing thingson my own.
Mom doesn't trust me anddoesn't believe that I'm capable
of doing things on my own, andI would get so frustrated with
her, like mom, of course, whatdo you think?
I'm stupid, I'm a little kid,like that narrative of I'm
(11:02):
incapable, or she doesn't trustme.
If I asked myself in thatmoment what makes that true or
what evidence do I have thatsupports this?
Just pause for a minute and askthat question.
I couldn't give you a genuineanswer to it, because the
(11:23):
narrative is not true.
I have nothing that supports,and you likely have nothing that
supports, the very narrativethat you're holding is true in
your mind, because you may notbe pausing and slowing down for
just 10 to 30 seconds to reflect.
(11:48):
So when she will do that?
Now there's a split secondthought of you know, of course,
yes, mom, but it's instantly now.
My conditioned response is oh,there's somebody that loves me,
(12:10):
and I'm so grateful to have amom that looks after me and
cares for me.
We often can push people awayin our lives that mean a lot to
us because we don't take a stepback to understand what they're
really saying or to hear whatthey are really intending to
(12:30):
communicate, and we can oftencreate a false narrative even
for the very things that we wantto go after.
I remember having doubts whenlaunching this podcast and now
we have over 200 episodes outbut I remember having doubts
that I don't have the equipment.
(12:51):
I'm not an interviewer.
I don't know anything aboutmedia.
I'm a total phony.
What do I know about personaldevelopment and putting my whole
work out there to the world now?
Well, what makes that true?
What evidence do I have tosupport the claim that I know
(13:12):
nothing about personaldevelopment?
Oh well, you've been on thisgoal-setting journey now from
2011 to now 2025.
You've written your goals downevery year.
You've helped countless people.
Doesn't sound like you don'tknow nothing.
(13:33):
So let's move forward when youstep back, and this is one that
I often ask in periods of doubt,in periods of disbelief and in
(13:53):
periods of frustration, becausein those moments, one, we can
create and believe a falsenarrative and two, we can be
completely tone deaf to the realmessage and not allow ourselves
(14:17):
to hear what somebody orsomething may be intending to
get through to us.
Now I hear every time that mymom is showing me love, every
time Somebody that loves me.
No point in getting upset.
(14:37):
There's a lot of people thatwould kill to be able to have
their mom or their dad orsomebody that's important to
them in their lives, check up onthem.
Don't push those people away.
What makes this true and whatevidence do I have?
(14:59):
The next one is one that one ofmy coaches over the last year,
marcus Collius, gave to me, andthis is one that often comes up
in my journal, and I look atthis from a personal and
professional perspective as well.
What does ideal look like?
(15:21):
And think about that, foreverything, or whatever might
occurs to you, is meaningful.
What does ideal look like inthis moment, as it relates to
your day, as it relates to yourweek, as it relates to your
(15:42):
relationship, everything Anotherway to look at that question is
what is a 10 out of 10 day weekrelationship look like?
This one is a great one to usein many capacities, one.
It's one that can help get youout of a negative state, because
(16:07):
when you ask that question,what does ideal look like?
You're going to be thinkingabout all of the positive
contributors to that thing.
What does ideal look like rightnow for your work week?
What does ideal look like rightnow for your work week?
Well, ideal would look likethree less meetings that can be
(16:33):
consolidated into one.
It looks like taking a walkinglunch break or a walking meeting
on Mondays and Fridays asopposed to sitting down days and
Fridays as opposed to sittingdown.
It looks like every otherFriday taking two hours off
early to enjoy the beach, thesetting.
Whatever the case may be, asyou're generating those ideas,
(16:58):
it's tough not to alter yourstate.
How could someone say or thinkabout those things with a frown
or without having some jolt of?
oh man, that's awesome and somejolt of imagining those very
things then taking place.
It's tough for me even to sayit right now without starting to
(17:20):
smile from ear to ear.
The other reason why this isimportant is because we're
evolving beings, as I mentioned,and ideal today might look
different in six months and 12months.
The other thing is that it canhelp you really see a trend as
(17:47):
to what is becoming more andmore concrete.
So meaning, I've journaledabout this question dozens of
times and what I look for attimes is okay, what looked the
same between 2025, where we'reat right now to May of 2024, or
(18:22):
May of 2023.
I forgot.
I've been asking myself thisone for a while.
Beyond Marcus, what does thatlook like?
And while I've seen some slightshifts, there are a lot of
things that remain hyperconsistent, which tells me that,
okay, these are the things thatare really important to
(18:43):
continue doing and to keep inthe routine and to continue
refining, and these are thingsthat we can identify really as a
value or a non-negotiable.
And as we move forward, don'tlose sight of that, because if
that has not fallen off the listin multiple years, that's
(19:05):
probably just a part of who youare and it's something that you
really enjoy and love.
So this question can alter yourstate, create positivity,
create clarity and really helpstay in alignment with what is
(19:28):
most meaningful and useful inyour life.
So what we've gone through sofar is what makes this true and
what does ideal look like?
Or what would ideal look like?
And you can ask that questionin any regard personal,
(19:51):
professional, relationship.
I love that question.
The last one, and this is onethat I wish I knew when I was
especially a youngster, butreally in my teenage years
what's the good in this?
Or, said differently, how isthis serving me right now?
(20:13):
So, again, when we think aboutquestion one and number three, I
prefer to focus on thequestions that can quickly get
us out of a road bump or get usout of creating a narrative that
(20:35):
doesn't serve us and thenholding that as true and not
moving closer towards our goalsand dreams.
I love to focus on things thatget us back to center and going
upwards as quickly as possible.
And the more that we practicethese questions, ask ourselves
these questions, we cancondition the response and we
(20:58):
can condition even the action toask the question so that when
something doesn't go your way orwhen you catch yourself
potentially creating a story,you can instantly ask yourself
what makes this true.
When you encounter a road bump,something doesn't go your way,
(21:19):
you can instantly ask yourselfwhat's the good in this and how
is this serving me right now?
Because there is good that canbe extracted from everything in
life.
Maybe not instantly, right inthe moment, but I do believe
that there is good.
And then there is good meaningthat good is good and not good
(21:40):
delivers good.
Therefore, not good is good.
Said differently, one thingthat I say when I'm running in
the morning, especially when I'mexpressing my gratitude, I
literally and I'm doing thisright now too I have my arms
wide open and I'm expressing I'mso grateful, I'm so grateful,
(22:03):
thank you so much for this day.
I'm so grateful for all of thegreat things that have came and
I'm so grateful for the not sogood things to come or anything
that's not useful to come,because I know that's going to
bring good to.
Therefore, all is good, good isgood and bad is good, because
bad brings good.
(22:25):
Now, some of you may bescratching your head or thinking
what the heck are you talkingabout?
That wasn't something that Ijust said once and then
instantly it just rattles offthe tongue.
That is something that has comewith a lot of conditioning and
practice that even if somethingdoesn't go my way or there's a
(22:48):
difficult circumstance in life,there's a relationship that may
have ended, whatever the casemay be, I will find the good in
that very quickly and focus onthat, versus allow the bad or
the quote bad, the perceived badto drag me down.
(23:11):
Bad to drag me down Now.
There can be extremes with this, and the intent isn't to go
down that bunny hole right now,the extremes being that so
you're telling me that you wouldfind good in someone dying
instantly.
Hold on here, hold on here.
(23:31):
That's not the case.
But generally speaking, outsideof extremities, there is good
that can quickly be found injust about anything in life, and
when we condition ourselves toask that question and focus on
that, we keep moving forward.
We keep moving towards theanswers that we are seeking and
(23:52):
the dreams that we're ultimatelyenvisioning and working to
create.
I mentioned that I wish I wouldhave known what this question
was when I was a teenager,because that's when I was most
upset at the world, thinking man, why is this happening to me?
Why is all this stuff at homethat I'm so angry about and
(24:14):
being destructive about.
Why is this happening to me?
Versus if someone would havesaid hey, man, what's the good
it's giving you right now, likeeverything I went through in my
past in a broken household isliterally what is creating this
podcast and what is creating myfuture outside the corporate
(24:37):
world.
So much good, so much goodness.
Life is filled with good and anabundance of gifts when we
condition ourselves and trainourselves to look at it from the
right lens.
What's one way you can do that?
Ask the right questions.
What's a really good question.
(24:58):
What's the good in this?
How is this serving me rightnow?
What good is this possiblygiving me?
Think about that with ascenario that has put you where
you're at today.
Or think about that withsomething that you may be
struggling with right now orhave struggled with recently.
(25:21):
Can you sit with that for a fewmoments and think about at
least one positive that it hasbrought out or that it can bring
out that will make you better,that will keep you out of that
(25:44):
situation again in the future?
I'd be hard-pressed if youweren't able to find one thing.
So, as we go along this journey,going back to the beginning.
I'm going to reread the quotethe power is in you, the answer
is in you, and you are theanswer to all your searches.
You are the goal, you are theanswer.
(26:06):
It's never outside.
What that says is is no matterwhat conquest you're on right
now, there's nobody that knowsit better than you, and there's
nobody that knows how to be youbetter than you, and there's
(26:26):
going to be things that willpresent themselves that attempt
to get you off course, attemptto sway you from the very thing
that you know you want.
And these three questions arevery useful in keeping you on
the path finding the good andreconnecting with.
(26:50):
What is it that is really mostmeaningful at the end of the day
, what makes this true, what'sthe good in this and what does
ideal look like?
These are three questions thathave completely changed my life
and really serve at the top ofthe arsenal for staying in that
(27:13):
elevated state and continuing tomove forward, recognizing tons
of goodness that will enable youand will enable me, enable us,
to win today.
Thank you so much.
Welcome to the Wednesday podcast, a weekly
resource thoughtfully crafted tohelp people build and refine
discipline, accomplish theirgoals, fortify their mindsets
and be of service to somebody inthis world.
My name is Ryan Cass and I amyour host, and it is my mission
and commitment to deliveramazing episodes to you every
week where you'll learn frommyself or renowned expert in
(00:26):
their field.
We love helping people win inevery aspect of their lives, and
you can help us win by sharingthe show with somebody that you
believe will benefit from it,subscribing and leaving a rating
and review.
We believe that everybody inthis world is meant to do
something great with their livesand we're here to help play a
(00:47):
role in that.
Thank you for tuning in andlet's win today.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
The power is in you, the answer is in you and you are
the answer to all your searches.
The answer to all your searches, you are the goal, you are the
answer.
It's never outside EckhartTolle.
(01:19):
Eckhart Tolle is a well-knownauthor and spiritual
psychologist mindset coach,renowned for helping people
identify what's already withinthemselves to move forward, has
a lot of amazing quotes, and, aswe're now approaching the
halfway point in the year, Ilove to bring back some tips
(01:41):
that are often referenced at thebeginning of the year, some
tips that are often referencedat the beginning of the year.
This is the time where theweather's getting warmer, people
are and this is statisticallyproven becoming a little less
focused on their goals,especially now with vacations
coming up, and I love to provideresources to help people stay
(02:04):
as focused as possible andenable them to be successful.
That opening quote was bydesign, in that we already have
all of the answers that we needwithin us, answers that we need
(02:30):
within us.
I think about this when Iresearch a lot of well-renowned
coaches, especially guys like EdMilet or Brennan Burchard, who
have business backgrounds bytrade, yet they're coaching
athletes, they're coachingentrepreneurs and industries
that they have no experience in.
They're coaching doctors,astronauts, people that are
(02:54):
completely outside of theirrealm, and I remember first
thinking, well, what are theycoaching them on?
How can they possibly be?
Well, what are they coachingthem on?
How can they possibly becoaching them?
As if this is a sports-typerelationship, where Ed Milet
isn't going to tell MichaelChandler, who's one of his UFC
(03:16):
clients, when to throw a punch,when to throw a hard left versus
a right uppercut.
So what is he actually doing?
And he's really helping him inthis case, michael, one of the
greatest UFC fighters out thereright now explore what's already
(03:40):
within himself.
So think about that withinhimself.
So think about that.
Some of the most well-renownedcoaches in the world, even Tony
Robbins, who has worked withpeople in every profession,
industry, world leaders, thingsthat he has no actual experience
(04:01):
in, yet he can coach people onit.
He's not giving the how-tos.
The how-to for life alreadyresides within you, and one way
that we can understand that andsee what's in us or create the
(04:25):
pathway to go where we desire,is by asking ourselves the right
questions, and this is whatthis episode is about.
Today.
There are three questions thathave completely changed my life,
many of which well, a couple ofwhich I reference in this
(04:48):
podcast frequently, because Ibelieve that these three
questions we're going to go overtoday aren't just three
questions that you ask yourselfonce and then.
It's like an inventory or achecklist and you're good, you
don't need to ask them anymorebecause it gave you an answer or
clarity in that moment and nowthat's it.
(05:11):
As beings, we are constantlyevolving and what is important
to us or meaningful us todaymight not be important to you or
as meaningful one year from now, two years from now, six months
from now, depending on how lifechanges.
(05:32):
Life on average as an adultchanges 38 plus times.
An adult goes through 38 plusmajor life changes after turning
18 years old.
I remember that from aninterview with Brad Stahlberg at
the beginning of last yeargoing over his book Master of
Change.
(05:52):
So the answers and the claritythat we want can be extracted by
asking ourselves the rightquestions, and that's what these
well-renowned coaches do andthe people like the Eckhart
Tolle with the opening quoteremind us of is that, hey, I'm
(06:15):
not going to tell you how to goand be a doctor.
If that's what you want to doand maybe you're unsure, I'm
going to ask you the rightquestions that are going to help
you chart the course that youknow you need to go on in order
to achieve that thing.
Now, the questions that we'regoing to pose here are more so
(06:39):
intended for for keeping youmoving forward, regardless of
what you may encounter along theway.
So there's a whole set ofquestions that can help you
identify your path, but thequestions we're posing here are
ones that, once you're on yourpath, or once you and when you
(07:04):
encounter some sort of roadblock, this will keep you moving
forward versus set you back.
And an example of that in thefirst question, I believe, one
that I asked myself countlesstimes personally, professionally
, in a variety of fashions whatmakes this true?
(07:26):
What makes this true?
What makes this true?
Another way you can look atthis question is what evidence
do I have right now?
But go back.
What makes this true Now?
What's the context behind that?
We often can have a thoughtabout not being capable enough,
(07:48):
not being good enough.
That voice of doubt visits themost resilient people in the
world when you study them andlisten to them.
Even people like David Goggins,people think now or many people
may think that, for asresilient as he is and for
everything that he's gonethrough that.
(08:09):
He has found a way topermanently conquer the voice of
doubt, and it never visits himanymore, or else he wouldn't be
able to do all these things.
That man wakes up in themorning, just like you and I do.
That man wakes up in themorning, just like you and I do,
(08:36):
goes downstairs, or however hishouse is laid out, but goes
down and looks at his workoutgear, just like you and I do,
not wanting to put it on,wanting to jump back in bed,
believing that he's not capableof doing whatever it is that
he's going after.
And the difference maker is,even when those voices visit, he
(08:56):
doesn't buy into the story, orwe can easily buy into the story
that then prevents us fromdoing the very thing that we
know is most useful or mostbeneficial to getting us to
where we want to go.
We can buy into this narrativethat prevents us from exploring,
(09:23):
or rather, prevents us fromcreating the answer that's
already inside of us, becausewe're allowing this narrative to
stop us.
An example of that, andsomething that completely
changed the game for me after Iattended a personal development
(09:47):
course in 2021.
My mom, who I love to death,even at 32 years old now,
doesn't matter where I'm going.
I could be going on a businesstrip.
I could be going to a friend'shouse.
She will always ask somethingalong the lines of well, did you
(10:09):
bring a jacket, if she knowsthe training?
Did you bring gloves?
Did you feed the dog?
And what I used to hear when allshe was doing was looking out
for me, is you're nottrustworthy, you're uncapable,
(10:34):
you're like a little kid, you'renot an adult.
That's what I would hear andthat's the narrative that I
created that my own mom doesn'ttrust me and doesn't believe
that I'm capable of doing thingson my own.
Mom doesn't trust me anddoesn't believe that I'm capable
of doing things on my own, andI would get so frustrated with
her, like mom, of course, whatdo you think?
I'm stupid, I'm a little kid,like that narrative of I'm
(11:02):
incapable, or she doesn't trustme.
If I asked myself in thatmoment what makes that true or
what evidence do I have thatsupports this?
Just pause for a minute and askthat question.
I couldn't give you a genuineanswer to it, because the
(11:23):
narrative is not true.
I have nothing that supports,and you likely have nothing that
supports, the very narrativethat you're holding is true in
your mind, because you may notbe pausing and slowing down for
just 10 to 30 seconds to reflect.
(11:48):
So when she will do that?
Now there's a split secondthought of you know, of course,
yes, mom, but it's instantly now.
My conditioned response is oh,there's somebody that loves me,
(12:10):
and I'm so grateful to have amom that looks after me and
cares for me.
We often can push people awayin our lives that mean a lot to
us because we don't take a stepback to understand what they're
really saying or to hear whatthey are really intending to
(12:30):
communicate, and we can oftencreate a false narrative even
for the very things that we wantto go after.
I remember having doubts whenlaunching this podcast and now
we have over 200 episodes outbut I remember having doubts
that I don't have the equipment.
(12:51):
I'm not an interviewer.
I don't know anything aboutmedia.
I'm a total phony.
What do I know about personaldevelopment and putting my whole
work out there to the world now?
Well, what makes that true?
What evidence do I have tosupport the claim that I know
(13:12):
nothing about personaldevelopment?
Oh well, you've been on thisgoal-setting journey now from
2011 to now 2025.
You've written your goals downevery year.
You've helped countless people.
Doesn't sound like you don'tknow nothing.
(13:33):
So let's move forward when youstep back, and this is one that
I often ask in periods of doubt,in periods of disbelief and in
(13:53):
periods of frustration, becausein those moments, one, we can
create and believe a falsenarrative and two, we can be
completely tone deaf to the realmessage and not allow ourselves
(14:17):
to hear what somebody orsomething may be intending to
get through to us.
Now I hear every time that mymom is showing me love, every
time Somebody that loves me.
No point in getting upset.
(14:37):
There's a lot of people thatwould kill to be able to have
their mom or their dad orsomebody that's important to
them in their lives, check up onthem.
Don't push those people away.
What makes this true and whatevidence do I have?
(14:59):
The next one is one that one ofmy coaches over the last year,
marcus Collius, gave to me, andthis is one that often comes up
in my journal, and I look atthis from a personal and
professional perspective as well.
What does ideal look like?
(15:21):
And think about that, foreverything, or whatever might
occurs to you, is meaningful.
What does ideal look like inthis moment, as it relates to
your day, as it relates to yourweek, as it relates to your
(15:42):
relationship, everything Anotherway to look at that question is
what is a 10 out of 10 day weekrelationship look like?
This one is a great one to usein many capacities, one.
It's one that can help get youout of a negative state, because
(16:07):
when you ask that question,what does ideal look like?
You're going to be thinkingabout all of the positive
contributors to that thing.
What does ideal look like rightnow for your work week?
What does ideal look like rightnow for your work week?
Well, ideal would look likethree less meetings that can be
(16:33):
consolidated into one.
It looks like taking a walkinglunch break or a walking meeting
on Mondays and Fridays asopposed to sitting down days and
Fridays as opposed to sittingdown.
It looks like every otherFriday taking two hours off
early to enjoy the beach, thesetting.
Whatever the case may be, asyou're generating those ideas,
(16:58):
it's tough not to alter yourstate.
How could someone say or thinkabout those things with a frown
or without having some jolt of?
oh man, that's awesome and somejolt of imagining those very
things then taking place.
It's tough for me even to sayit right now without starting to
(17:20):
smile from ear to ear.
The other reason why this isimportant is because we're
evolving beings, as I mentioned,and ideal today might look
different in six months and 12months.
The other thing is that it canhelp you really see a trend as
(17:47):
to what is becoming more andmore concrete.
So meaning, I've journaledabout this question dozens of
times and what I look for attimes is okay, what looked the
same between 2025, where we'reat right now to May of 2024, or
(18:22):
May of 2023.
I forgot.
I've been asking myself thisone for a while.
Beyond Marcus, what does thatlook like?
And while I've seen some slightshifts, there are a lot of
things that remain hyperconsistent, which tells me that,
okay, these are the things thatare really important to
(18:43):
continue doing and to keep inthe routine and to continue
refining, and these are thingsthat we can identify really as a
value or a non-negotiable.
And as we move forward, don'tlose sight of that, because if
that has not fallen off the listin multiple years, that's
(19:05):
probably just a part of who youare and it's something that you
really enjoy and love.
So this question can alter yourstate, create positivity,
create clarity and really helpstay in alignment with what is
(19:28):
most meaningful and useful inyour life.
So what we've gone through sofar is what makes this true and
what does ideal look like?
Or what would ideal look like?
And you can ask that questionin any regard personal,
(19:51):
professional, relationship.
I love that question.
The last one, and this is onethat I wish I knew when I was
especially a youngster, butreally in my teenage years
what's the good in this?
Or, said differently, how isthis serving me right now?
(20:13):
So, again, when we think aboutquestion one and number three, I
prefer to focus on thequestions that can quickly get
us out of a road bump or get usout of creating a narrative that
(20:35):
doesn't serve us and thenholding that as true and not
moving closer towards our goalsand dreams.
I love to focus on things thatget us back to center and going
upwards as quickly as possible.
And the more that we practicethese questions, ask ourselves
these questions, we cancondition the response and we
(20:58):
can condition even the action toask the question so that when
something doesn't go your way orwhen you catch yourself
potentially creating a story,you can instantly ask yourself
what makes this true.
When you encounter a road bump,something doesn't go your way,
(21:19):
you can instantly ask yourselfwhat's the good in this and how
is this serving me right now?
Because there is good that canbe extracted from everything in
life.
Maybe not instantly, right inthe moment, but I do believe
that there is good.
And then there is good meaningthat good is good and not good
(21:40):
delivers good.
Therefore, not good is good.
Said differently, one thingthat I say when I'm running in
the morning, especially when I'mexpressing my gratitude, I
literally and I'm doing thisright now too I have my arms
wide open and I'm expressing I'mso grateful, I'm so grateful,
(22:03):
thank you so much for this day.
I'm so grateful for all of thegreat things that have came and
I'm so grateful for the not sogood things to come or anything
that's not useful to come,because I know that's going to
bring good to.
Therefore, all is good, good isgood and bad is good, because
bad brings good.
(22:25):
Now, some of you may bescratching your head or thinking
what the heck are you talkingabout?
That wasn't something that Ijust said once and then
instantly it just rattles offthe tongue.
That is something that has comewith a lot of conditioning and
practice that even if somethingdoesn't go my way or there's a
(22:48):
difficult circumstance in life,there's a relationship that may
have ended, whatever the casemay be, I will find the good in
that very quickly and focus onthat, versus allow the bad or
the quote bad, the perceived badto drag me down.
(23:11):
Bad to drag me down Now.
There can be extremes with this, and the intent isn't to go
down that bunny hole right now,the extremes being that so
you're telling me that you wouldfind good in someone dying
instantly.
Hold on here, hold on here.
(23:31):
That's not the case.
But generally speaking, outsideof extremities, there is good
that can quickly be found injust about anything in life, and
when we condition ourselves toask that question and focus on
that, we keep moving forward.
We keep moving towards theanswers that we are seeking and
(23:52):
the dreams that we're ultimatelyenvisioning and working to
create.
I mentioned that I wish I wouldhave known what this question
was when I was a teenager,because that's when I was most
upset at the world, thinking man, why is this happening to me?
Why is all this stuff at homethat I'm so angry about and
(24:14):
being destructive about.
Why is this happening to me?
Versus if someone would havesaid hey, man, what's the good
it's giving you right now, likeeverything I went through in my
past in a broken household isliterally what is creating this
podcast and what is creating myfuture outside the corporate
(24:37):
world.
So much good, so much goodness.
Life is filled with good and anabundance of gifts when we
condition ourselves and trainourselves to look at it from the
right lens.
What's one way you can do that?
Ask the right questions.
What's a really good question.
(24:58):
What's the good in this?
How is this serving me rightnow?
What good is this possiblygiving me?
Think about that with ascenario that has put you where
you're at today.
Or think about that withsomething that you may be
struggling with right now orhave struggled with recently.
(25:21):
Can you sit with that for a fewmoments and think about at
least one positive that it hasbrought out or that it can bring
out that will make you better,that will keep you out of that
(25:44):
situation again in the future?
I'd be hard-pressed if youweren't able to find one thing.
So, as we go along this journey,going back to the beginning.
I'm going to reread the quotethe power is in you, the answer
is in you, and you are theanswer to all your searches.
You are the goal, you are theanswer.
(26:06):
It's never outside.
What that says is is no matterwhat conquest you're on right
now, there's nobody that knowsit better than you, and there's
nobody that knows how to be youbetter than you, and there's
(26:26):
going to be things that willpresent themselves that attempt
to get you off course, attemptto sway you from the very thing
that you know you want.
And these three questions arevery useful in keeping you on
the path finding the good andreconnecting with.
(26:50):
What is it that is really mostmeaningful at the end of the day
, what makes this true, what'sthe good in this and what does
ideal look like?
These are three questions thathave completely changed my life
and really serve at the top ofthe arsenal for staying in that
(27:13):
elevated state and continuing tomove forward, recognizing tons
of goodness that will enable youand will enable me, enable us,
to win today.
Thank you so much.
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