133 | Redefining Retirement: Discovering the Freedom Mindset for Wealth and Work You Love

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In this episode, I challenge the outdated narrative surrounding retirement and the concept of financial freedom.  Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “I’ll finally rest when I retire”?  I dive into how the traditional retirement model can feel restrictive, especially for women, and how it reinforces a scarcity mindset. 

Traditional retirement models are built around the assumption that work is something to endure, not something that can nourish your soul. But what if the goal isn’t to escape work, and instead, to reimagine it?

I'm sharing my own personal take on financial freedom, where wealth supports the life you actually want to live now, not decades from now. Especially for women and cyclical beings, this episode is an invitation to build wealth that honors your nervous system, your rhythms, and your soul’s seasons. 

In this episode, we'll explore:

• Why the traditional retirement story feels restrictive for so many women
• The burnout loop created by the “grind now, rest later” approach to work
• How to define wealth beyond numbers—and into freedom of choice
• What it means to create soul-led work that evolves with you
• How to build a business that allows rest along the way, not just at the end
• My thoughts on mini-retirements and sabbaticals

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Curious what your Human Design chart reveals about how you're uniquely designed to make aligned financial decisions?

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Step 3: Ready to transform your relationship with money and build true financial confidence?

Let’s create a plan that feels aligned, intentional, and empowering—just for you.

➡️ Schedule your free clarity call here (https://tidycal.com/eringray/45-min-call-with-erin)

Money doesn't have to feel overwhelming. Let's create a plan that feels nurturing and custom to you.

From my soul to yours,

Erin

Episode Transcript

Erin Gray (00:00):
Welcome back to your Money, your Rules.
I want to share an idea thatI've been sitting with for a
while and how it has us, Ibelieve, on this hamster wheel,
postponing our joy, ourcreativity, our creative
endeavors for some future state.
I don't really believe inretirement anymore, and I don't
mean that in a hustle culture,grind forever kind of way.

(00:24):
I mean that I no longer seeretirement as the ultimate end
goal.
So if you've ever felt like thetraditional financial planning
doesn't quite fit your values oryour visions, this episode is
for you.
Now, if you've been building abusiness or a financial plan

(00:45):
that feels off in your body orit feels like that you're on a
fast track to burnout, I inviteyou to pause and ask yourself
what would life feel like if Ididn't need to retire from it?
What if the work that I'mactually doing right now could
evolve with me, nourish me andallow me to rest and allow for

(01:10):
rest along the way Inside myprivate one-on-one coaching
container?
You know we go beyond what Icall the 3D the spreadsheets,
the QuickBooks, the planning andwe build wealth structures that
feel nourishing and sustainableand aligned with who you are,
based on what you want, what youfeel in your body and based on

(01:35):
your intuition, like I'm reallyhelping you tap back into who
you are, trusting yourself,trusting your intuition and
guiding you know to be able toguide yourself along the way.
I truly believe that we get tolive well today and also
long-term.
If you are curious aboutworking together, all you have

(01:58):
to do is click the link in theshow notes to see if we are a
good fit for each other.
So let's talk about I'm goingto kind of put on my old CFP hat
and I'm going to talk aboutwhat we were kind of taught
about retirement, what societyat least what I'm talking about
in Western culture has taught usabout retirement and then go
from there.
So retirement is, or has beenbuilt right around this model

(02:24):
that assumes work is somethingthat we endure.
It is a means to an end.
It is something that you makemoney at so that then you can
create a lump sum of money sothat you can then actually
retire, aka take time off, enjoyyour life and actually live the
life that you want.
And you know there is this ideathat we have a lot of us have

(02:46):
bought into that there will comea time when you won't be able
to work and that you'll need tohave this lump sum of money.
And it has us subscribing tothe idea of you know, working
for 30, 40 plus years,sacrificing your time and your
energy and your family life forsome future date, hoping, you

(03:08):
know, questioning, not feelingsecure or safe that you've saved
enough money to finally restwhen you're.
What is it now?
Social Security, retirement,age 67, I think for ages like us
, you know, to actually do workthat you love.
It looks like building wealthslowly, over time, and although
that might be true on somefronts, it's not factual or it's

(03:30):
not necessarily everyone'sreality.
You know, I've met many peoplethat created in a couple of
years what took me the last 20to create.
So we know that creating moneyisn't about time.
It truly is about our wealthconsciousness.
And, you know, another thingthat we might buy into is that

(03:52):
our health.
I mean, I can't tell you howmany times that I hear people
say well, you know, as I'mgetting older or I have to prep
because you know part of youknow, retirement planning and
getting all of your ducks in arow is like making sure you have
long-term care insurance, and Ithink all of that has its place
, but when we're coming from theenergy that it is going to
happen and we need to preparefor it, I think that's very

(04:14):
different energy than if I needit, I have it but I'm not
planning on it.
And so how you think about yourhealth?
Do you believe that you'regetting healthier and fitter and
stronger as the more timesyou've gone around the sun, or
are you believing that yourhealth gets worse over time?

(04:35):
You know, for many of us I think, especially women, who are
really remembering I should sayreally remembering who we are,
you know, stepping back into ourleadership, living an aligned
life of how we actually want to,that idea of retirement feels
very restrictive in our bodies.
You know we don't.

(04:57):
I'm one of them.
I didn't want to work myselfinto the ground just to be able
to buy back time later.
You know there are things thatI have.
I would call it, like theprevious, aaron and Aaron now
that you know, after I decided Iwas going to stop working in my
family's business, there arethings that I've done that

(05:20):
there's no amount of money thatcould ever buy that time back.
Right, we've got to spend timewith each other as a family and
travel.
That that you know my daughterwill never be eight or 10 again,
that that you know my daughterwill never be eight or 10 again.
And I think for us it's reallyimportant for us to to really
get clear.
And I think, when we are reallyclear, a lot of us want to live

(05:42):
well now and also in the future.
We don't want to continue todelay our joy and our freedom
and our time with our spousesand our children to some point
later down the road.
And for me, and I think for alot of the people that I talked
to, you know, retirement had forme become this dangling carrot,

(06:09):
often used as a delay button ofjoy, of rest, of creativity, of
lifestyle freedom.
You know I've had people tellme that they are staying where
they are for retirement becauseof the health insurance benefits
or, depending where they are,you know, pension or their 401k
or something like that.

(06:29):
You know, when, depending onyour consciousness that you
could go out and create acompany to match your retirement
income in several years andthink about the remaining time
that you would have to continueto grow that company.
So the way that I have shifted,or I think about retirement now

(06:50):
what I actually believe insteadof that, normal work 40 years
and then you get to enjoy yourlife is doing work that you love
and getting paid extremely wellfor it.
I believe in soul-led work thatnourishes you across your life,
not that burns you out untilyou're allowed you know and I'm
air quoting until you're allowedto stop.

(07:12):
I believe in building wealththat creates freedom of choice,
not an escape route, and Idefinitely don't subscribe to
the BS of our income is going tobe less in retirement and we're
going to be in a lower taxbracket, which is why we need to
save in qualified retirementaccounts right now.

(07:32):
Like how often I hear peoplesay that or some planners say
that and I don't know if thathas come from what they've
actually seen, or and or what wehave been taught.
But I don't want to be in alower tax bracket when I retire.
I want to continue to make moremoney as I age.
When I retire, I want tocontinue to make more money as I

(07:55):
age.
I truly believe that designing alife and a business that you
don't need to retire frombecause they are in alignment
with who you are, it's not aseparation, it's your business
is coming through you andwhoever you believe in God,
spirit source whatever, that issome higher power, that that is

(08:20):
an act of moving within you andyou are the channel and the
vessel versus separating andwhen I say separating work from
your personal life, I just meanlike who you are as a person,
like you are the same person inyour business as in your
personal life, because it iscoming from within.
So for me and the women that Isupport, the real desire isn't
really retirement or some endgoal.

(08:41):
It's having time, sovereignty,right, having freedom over and
choosing how do you want tospend your time.
Nervous, safe income, meaninghow are you generating your
income and are you doing it froma place of love and joy?
And when I say safety, what Imean is that you truly
understand that you are the onethat creates.

(09:01):
Yes, money comes from source,from God, but you are the one
that is creating it.
It's not something that happensoutside of you, allowing
yourself to have creativefreedom and spaciousness and
time and meaning and impact.
And I believe you don't have towait until 65 or 67.
You know like, if you're payingattention to what social

(09:24):
security says, you can structureyour life, your business and
your money now to honor thosevalues and I believe that the
work for us is to become theperson that believes that this
is true in her body and createsthat now.
So I truly believe you know themore that I have thought about

(09:45):
this.
I was messaging a friend theother day and we were talking
about our cycles and I believethat definitely.
I mean, we're all creatures,all of us live in different
cycles, but the atmosphere thatmany of us women have grown up
in has been very masculineenergy, at least a lot of my

(10:06):
clients and friends of mine.
Right, I mean the financialplanning world and the
construction world is verymasculine maybe not so much now,
but definitely when I was in itit's very masculine, it was
masculine energy.
And as women, you know we arecyclical beings.
Think about our cycle and youknow I've been paying attention

(10:28):
to my energy levels and how itchanges, based on when I'm
menstruating or when I'movulating, and I'm thinking
about how I have operated insuch a masculine world and how
we have probably been taught andthought that we didn't have a
choice but to run a business or,you know, lead like men do, and

(10:54):
I don't think that biologically, that's actually how we're
wired to do it and actually whatwe want to do.
We're not meant to live in onthese linear timelines where we
go, go, go, grind for decadesand then we suddenly get to stop
and rest.
So think about, instead of likeretirement as an end goal or a

(11:20):
place where you're getting to,what if you gave yourself and
I've talked about this onprevious podcasts of like mini
retirements or creative seasonsor spacious off time in your
business, shifting maybe how youreceive money, like relying on,
yes, your business, but likecreating multiple streams of

(11:42):
income so that when you want totake time off, you can allow
other sources of income tosupport you.
And I think that that is, youknow, how I've really started to
.
You know, I always thoughtwealth meant money, but that is
how I have learned to viewwealth now as the ability to

(12:04):
pivot, to rest, to choosedifferently when your soul is
calling for the next iterationof yourself, the next chapter.
And we're not meant to live ourfullest lives after we're done
working.
You know we're meant to do workas an extension of who we are.

(12:28):
So this week I would encourageyou to ponder If you love your
business, you love your life.
I'm so excited for you and soproud of you and like yes, yes
to you, celebrate you.
If you don't love your businessor you're not necessarily loving
parts of your work, what Iwould have you ponder for this

(12:50):
week is if you are someone whois in your business or doing
your work just so you can get toa point where you can finally
relax and have fun and enjoyyourself.
I want you to ponder what wouldit look like for me to love the
life that I have right now.
What would it look like toenjoy the work that I do and be

(13:17):
able to take time off or travelor whatever it is that lights
your soul on fire along withyour business?
It's like it's not somethingthat you have to work towards to
get to a certain amount to thenbe able to enjoy your life Like
.
What would it look like toenjoy my life right now and
write that down?
And what that might look likemight be different for you than

(13:38):
someone else, and that isperfectly okay.
Thank you for being here andfor letting this conversation
expand your mind and yourconsciousness.
Until next time, may your worknourish you, may your wealth
support you and may your lifefeel like something that you
never want to retire from.