November 17, 2025 • 21 mins
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In this episode, we cover:
- Reframing taxes as neutral
- Using somatic tools to create safety before tackling numbers
- Expanding the window of tolerance with micro-actions
- Embodying new beliefs through consistent, aligned steps
- Working with CPAs while keeping your power
- Seeing numbers as feedback rather than judgment
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Ep. 161 Stop Dreading Tax Season: Nervous System Tools and YE Tax Prep for Female Entrepreneurs
Ep. 160 Simple YE Money Rituals for a Calm Tax Season
Other ways to connect with me:
Come learn with me in my monthly workshops
➡️ Join here
Grab your free Human Design chart
➡️ Schedule your free clarity call here
From my soul to yours,
Erin
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Erin Gray (00:00):
This is the third episode in the series that I
have done on taxes.
So if you haven't listened tothe last two episodes, I believe
that's episode 160 and 161, goback, listen to those for more
of the nuts and bolts abouttaxes and tax planning, like
what I would do to prep andprepare, and also
emotional-wise.
(00:20):
This one is going to be more soabout like what your money
story actually reveals abouttaxes.
So this is going to be moredefinitely emotional based than
specific 3D tax planning stuff.
You know, for many of us thataren't regulated, right?
When it comes to taxes, taxseason has a way of stirring
(00:41):
those things up that are alreadywithin us.
You know, we have thesefeelings of stress and avoidance
and shame, not because it's taxseason.
Like tax season is just likemoney.
It just is.
It's neutral.
But what we are experiencing isour perception, our beliefs,
what is the emotions that arestored in our body.
That is why we feel not safeand not at ease when it comes to
(01:05):
taxes.
So in this episode, I'm goingto be talking about how your
money story actually shapes yourexperience with taxes and why
healing your relationship withmoney and taxes and everything
that involves around money andtaxes and all of the stuff
changes how you are going tomove through every financial
season in your life and also inyour business.
(01:28):
So let's dive in.
I want to give just a quickannouncement.
I am going to be having andbegin having monthly workshops
via Zoom.
I believe I'm going to startthem in December.
They're going to be intuitivelyled, just like this podcast.
I come up with ideas based oneither what I have experienced
in my own life, what I amcoaching clients through, and
(01:49):
what we have talked about.
And so whatever download that Iget for that month of what I
want to talk about, then that iswhat I'm going to decide how to
have these workshops.
So there will be a link in theshow notes that you can register
for.
That's not up yet at the timeof this release, but there will
be a landing page.
I'm working with my VA to getall of that prepped and ready
(02:11):
for you.
But you can be able to go tothe landing page.
You can see what the workshopis going to be about this month.
And I think for December, whatI'm going to start with is
talking, being able to talk toyour spouse around money,
because that has been, and youknow, when I asked in my
Facebook group, they all saidthey wanted to learn more about
how to speak to your spouse withmoney.
(02:32):
Actual physical workshop that Idid here in Boise, a lot of
them had questions and we reallyspent a lot of time on speaking
to your spouse and how do youenergetically approach money
with your spouse.
So I think that's what I'mgoing to have for that first
workshop in December.
And then moving forward, like Imentioned, it'll be whatever
(02:52):
download I get, whatever I'msensing that, you know, the
collective needs to hear inregards to money.
That's what I will have theworkshop on.
So stay tuned for that.
Keep an eye out in the shownotes.
That way you can just click thelink and then you can register
and then come to the to theworkshop.
And it is going to be onlineand it will be Zoom.
(03:16):
So let's talk about how so manyof us have been taught or we
have absorbed messages, or thiscan also be, you know,
generationally passed downaround maybe not being good with
math, maybe that we aren'tnumbers people, or you know,
(03:36):
that someone else knows betterthan we do about our business or
money or taxes.
And so we outsource our powerand we outsource our decision
making to them.
And I just want to say this isall BS.
Like, I don't believe anybodyis bad with math.
It is a thought, it is abelief.
I know a lot of us might havebeen taught that growing up.
(03:58):
And I do really think that thatshapes how we think and feel
about ourselves and ourself-esteem and our
self-concept.
I'm going to be the first todefend you because we are not
taught finances in school.
In college, you're not, it'snot a requirement.
Like I took, I think six toeight classes specifically for
(04:20):
my CFP, my certified financialplanning degree.
That was above and beyond thefinancial, like I got a BA in
finance.
So I had to take financialclasses and then I had to take
very specific financial planningclasses.
And I think out of all of thoseclasses, so think about, you
know, what's 15 hours a semesterfor four semesters, basically
(04:41):
your upper upper level, youknow, like your junior and
senior year.
So if I had 60 hours plusanother six or eight in
financial planning, I think Ihad like one class on personal
finance.
Thankfully, the teacher was sofun.
She was like a realtor fromWisconsin, and she made that
class so fun.
A lot of it I already knewbecause I had, you know, like
(05:02):
I've mentioned, grown up aroundmy dad.
He helped me do a lot ofunderstanding with personal
finance and balancing checkbooksand things like that.
But it really pays to have goodteachers, fun teachers, and
also, you know, this is just notstuff that is taught in
schools.
And if you have been here for awhile, you know my views on
(05:23):
school systems.
This is done on purpose.
This is done to keep the massesfeeling disempowered, to have
them feeling not aware or notknowledgeable about money
because money is another waythat we can control people if
you don't know about money inmoney systems.
(05:43):
And so this is not, I say allthat to say this is not your
fault.
This is done by more, how do Iwant to use this word, elite
people that know exactly whatthey're doing.
So give yourself a little bitof a break, give yourself some
grace and recognize that a lotof women and men don't
(06:05):
necessarily know about money andwe aren't being taught, and
that is done on purpose.
So when you throw all themessages, you know, when you
when you throw in what we havebeen taught culturally or
societally, you know, and how wehave been kept from knowing
about money on purpose, you takethat, and then you throw in all
(06:28):
those messages that we havereceived.
At least I'm talking more US,but I know from some of my
research this this expandsbeyond.
This is a global thing as well.
You know, you take that inaddition to taxes, right?
And the fear-mongering that hasoccurred with belief systems
around the IRS and attorneys andCPAs.
(06:49):
You know, it's no wonder thatso many of us are terrified of
taxes and tax season.
And when you think about it,when you have this story, when
you have these feelings in yourbody, when you have these
patterns that are in your body,what might look like
procrastination from the outsidemight actually be flight in
(07:12):
your nervous system.
It might be the flight, youknow, when I talk about fight,
flight, freeze, likeprocrastination, avoidance is
more of like a flight in yournervous system.
What looks like not opening themail or calling your CPA, that
might be a flight or a freezeresponse.
So I just want you to be awarethat think about what your
(07:33):
actions are, think of them assymptoms from an empowered place
of like, oh, okay, so if everytime I sit down or I say I'm
gonna sit down and I'm gonnalook at this and I don't, maybe
it's not willpower.
Maybe it's not actuallyanything to do with my mindset.
Maybe, and it could be maybe alittle bit of mindset, but maybe
there's actually somethingdeeper here in my body that my
(07:56):
body is holding on to that istrying to keep me safe and it
has a story and it has a patternand it has emotions in my body
that are protecting me that arenot wanting me to look at taxes.
So I want you to look at itfrom that view versus why can't
I just sit down and look at mytaxes?
Why can't I just call my CPA?
(08:17):
Why can't I just take care ofthis?
Like so often women say thesephrases to me.
And I'm like, listen, like,first of all, where's the
where's the calm and the and thesweetness that you need in this
moment, right?
Like asking yourself that isn'tcoming from curiosity.
It's almost like beatingyourself up.
So give yourself a little bitof grace, a little bit of space,
(08:38):
and recognize like maybe thereare that this goes deeper than
just the mindset stuff here.
And I also want to say as wellthat there's maybe one or two
that come to mind, but most ofthe CPAs that I've worked with,
bookkeepers, they aren'temotionally aware that this is
actually what's going on.
Like when I bring it to theirattention, they say, Oh, wow,
(08:59):
Erin, yes, that is true.
That is how my clientsexperience this.
That is how they act, but theyaren't connecting the dots that
clients not looking at theirbooks, clients not keeping their
appointments with me.
Oh, this is something deeperthan just taking the action.
This is an emotional thinghere.
They're not making thatconnection.
And so I just want you to beaware that, you know, that is
(09:24):
also what we're working withhere.
Like you're we aren't yet, yet,I say yet on purpose, because I
do believe we are changing as acollective, as a society.
But I would say right now,where we are in 2025 at Q4 2025,
a large majority of CPAs andbookkeepers are not aware that
(09:47):
this is actually what'shappening.
And so they can't guide you andprovide you the support that
you need because they aren'taware that this is actually the
root cause of what's going on.
That this is like your actionsare a symptom, and there's the
root causes really coming backto like money beliefs, money
(10:07):
stories, what does your bodyfeel safe or not safe with?
So this isn't about yourability.
This is not about being smartor not being smart or having the
knowledge or not having theknowledge.
Like all of that is a byproductof feeling safe first.
And so I want to encourage you,if this is you, this is some of
(10:28):
the work that I do with myclients.
Yes, we do get into thenitty-gritty of the actual
money, but it's the emotionalpart that we have to take care
of first.
And then the nitty-gritty, youknow, is comes so much more
easily.
So if that is something thatyou are interested in, curious
of how I can support you, clickthe link in the show notes,
(10:50):
schedule a call with me, and wecan talk about how I can be of
service to you.
So when you think about safety,think about if something that
really scared you, because Ithink we look at safety and
we're like, money, safety, no,that's not really, yes, it is.
It's another thing, right?
So think about another area ofyour life where you don't feel
(11:10):
safe with.
You probably, your body, youknow, like if you have been in a
car accident, there was, youmay not feel as safe to get in a
car with someone else becausethat is your body's way of
protecting you.
So just recognize that money,all of these different
circumstances that we have,money is just another
(11:32):
circumstance where our bodiesmay not feel safe.
And if we don't feel safe, thenwe cannot create an environment
to feel knowledgeable, smart,able, and capable.
Like safety has to come first.
So I want you to think abouttaxes as just being like the
trigger or the catalyst thatactivates what is already inside
(11:53):
of you.
So, like I already mentioned,taxes are just neutral.
But if you are avoiding things,if you are, you know, running
from theoretically speaking,then that is an opportunity for
you to see like, oh, this isdeeper than just, you know, I'm
not looking at my taxes.
It's showing you where you arecurrently with your money, your
(12:16):
money relationship, your moneystory, and your body.
Like the body has to feel safefirst and foremost before we can
move forward, you know, and wecan only go as quickly as we
feel safe to do so.
So I talk about in previousepisodes about like your window
of tolerance and think aboutyour nervous system like a
(12:36):
rubber band.
So if right now expanding yournervous system, like think about
expanding that rubber band, ifpulling your fingers apart all
the way feels like too much,then you have to be aware of
that.
You have to be mindful and youhave to do the somatic work so
that you can expand your nervoussystem and your window of
(12:57):
tolerance.
But going from zero to ahundred isn't necessarily kind
to your nervous system.
Zero to one might be what youcan handle today, right?
And so it's this constanteffort of working towards it and
releasing as well as creatingnew beliefs alongside of it.
(13:18):
So just notice what your firstreaction is when you think about
taxes.
Think about what your bodydoes.
Does it tense up?
Like I told you in the previousepisode about my experience
with taxes and how I used tofreeze when I would see an IRS
letter, even if it was just tochange my address.
So just recognize what are youfeeling in your body?
(13:39):
You probably might be, I'm nota you know, therapist or
psychologist, but you probablyare in your fight, flight,
freeze response.
And this takes slowing down.
This takes noticing what isgoing on in your nervous system.
I think so often it's like wedon't like the feeling, so we
just want to get away from it.
It's like, oh, I see an IRS orI see taxes that I need to do
(14:01):
taxes.
I'm just not gonna do it.
I'm gonna go shop.
I'm gonna go watch TV, I'mgonna go have a drink, I'm gonna
go wind down and, you know,watch TV or whatever it might
be, versus hang on a second,what's going on here?
I'm here for you, body.
I love you.
You know, talking to yourselfkindly and lovingly and being
like, okay, what are you feelingin this moment?
(14:23):
Like, what does that littlefive, 10-year-old, 12-year-old
little girl need in this moment?
That is the work that we needto be doing, not just like, oh,
I feel this, I don't want tofeel this.
Okay, I'm gonna go do somethingelse.
So I would ask myself, like toget clear and clarity, like
whose voice is this?
Like a question I always askmyself is, is this energy even
mine?
And I hear my intuition.
(14:45):
And so what I hear sometimes isyes, and sometimes I hear no.
Like some of this isgenerational, some of this is
societal, some of this is how wejust as a society with women
and with money, you know, someof this is cultural.
It could be from your parents,it could be from your teachers.
Like there's so much that itcould you have picked up, you
(15:06):
know, money and taxes withyourself.
So just recognizing and askingyourself and naming like, is
this energy mine?
Is this because of my beliefs?
And it can be a little bit ofyours, but I think I read
somewhere like 97, 98, 99 of ourthoughts.
I don't know exactly, but like90, let's just say 97% of our
(15:26):
thoughts, they're not even ours.
Meaning it's not ones that wethought up ourselves, it's it's
ones that we have received fromand absorbed in our environment.
So just recognizing that youmight have beliefs around taxes
that you may not even be awareof because you haven't given
yourself the opportunity to sitdown and just listen and journal
(15:50):
on what your beliefs are andwhere you picked up these
beliefs.
I always go back to somaticwork.
Like, what somatic work do youwant to do to support yourself?
Some clients can just noticewhen they feel that energy and
then they can like pay attentionto the energy and shift it.
Some, like I mentioned, I likeemotional release therapy.
Maybe you like breath work ortapping or culmination of all of
(16:13):
these or none of these, andsomething else works for you.
But you've got to practice andplay with what somatic
practices.
How are you gonna get into thebody and embody a different way
of being with taxes?
And sometimes that meansletting go, sometimes that means
letting go and creating newbeliefs, sometimes it's just
creating new beliefs.
But like, how are you going totake care of yourself and your
(16:37):
body during this time when youare noticing some of this stuff
come up?
And then obviously it'schoosing a new perspective, a
new way of being, a newself-concept.
And I would spend a lot of mytime here as well.
Like, I don't want to say one'smore important than the other,
they're all important, but howyou think about yourself, what
(17:00):
you action you are taking fromthat place, like I have a mentor
that says every act is an actof self-def definition, meaning
that every opportunity, everycircumstance is an opportunity
for you to define who you are inthis moment.
So if you are someone who isdeciding that they want to be
(17:20):
confident and calm with taxes,and every time that opportunity
presents to you, you don't lookat it, you don't do the somatic
work, you don't do the thingsthat you need to do to feel calm
and confident.
You're not embodying someonewho is wanting to feel calm and
confident with their taxes andtheir money.
So we have opportunities day inand day out to define who we
(17:42):
are, our new state of being.
And so asking yourself, am Iacting from that place?
You know, what would you loveto believe?
What would serve you and yourbusiness best?
Like really getting clear onwhat are those some of those
deep core beliefs that you needto embody and embodying those.
So when I say embody, what doesthat actually mean?
(18:03):
It means thinking a new beliefand then taking action from that
place.
Taxes are neutral, money isneutral, business is neutral,
but you deciding how do I wantto think and feel about my taxes
and my butt money and mybusiness, that is what you have
control over.
So some things that I had to gofrom is like I had to go from
(18:27):
where I was to just neutrality.
Like I just had to start sayinglike taxes are neutral, just
like the sun is neutral, justlike the ocean is neutral, so
are taxes.
I had to say things like I'm ahuman that's running a business,
and millions of other humansrun a business as well.
And if they can do it, I can doit because we all came from the
(18:48):
same source.
You know, like just think aboutit's you're gonna have to play
with this, but like whatever newperspective and stories you
want to create for you that aresupportive, that's what you're
gonna have to think about andthen decide on and then embody,
you know, make sure that they'reempowering and helping you
build the business and the lifethat you want.
Over time, tax season is goingto become less of a threat, more
(19:13):
of a reflection, more neutral.
And ultimately, I would love toget it to a place of like more
fun.
Like, how fun would it be if weall got to connect during tax
season and talk about how muchmoney we were paying in taxes
because of all the money that wepaid in, or how much money that
our CPA has been able to helpus save in taxes, because
(19:34):
there's different ways that theycould help us do that because
of all the money we made.
Like that's the that's the funstuff that I want us to be
talking about.
That is where I want us to getto to that place.
So thinking about that, all ofthat is going to change, not
because taxes have changed, notbecause tax season changes, but
because you changed, becauseyour perception changed, because
(19:56):
the way you viewed yourself andyour self-concept and you as a
business owner has changed.
It becomes, I always look atall of these little moments, is
every single moment is anopportunity for me to practice
safety and noticing what mynervous system is doing and how
(20:17):
calibrated I am and whatfrequency I am on.
And just think of it like atraining partner, you know, it's
it's an opportunity for you tosee and check in where you are
with your nervous system, howcalm you feel, what is, you
know, maybe still triggeringyou, or maybe not as much, but
it still is, but that's progresstoo.
(20:37):
So just think about and playwith like, how can these
circumstances be opportunitiesfor me to check in and see like
how far I have come, how muchwork I have done on myself, and
how that has actually shiftedbecause of that.
Okay, I think I'm done with thetax series.
(20:57):
If you have anything else ontaxes that you want me to talk
about or teach on, I'd be happyto do that.
Send me an email at it's notat.
So it's just support atgenerate a life well lived.
And I can do other tax episodesfor you.
But I think that the three thatI've got that feels pretty good
(21:18):
in terms of the emotional side,the actual nitty gritty of like
what are the actual tasks youneed to do for taxes and then
also your money story.
Okay, as always, I'm rootingfor you.
I'm looking forward to seeingsome of you on workshops that
I'll be hosting starting inDecember.
And I thank you for listeningand tuning in every week.
And I'll see you in the nextepisode.
This is the third episode in the series that I
have done on taxes.
So if you haven't listened tothe last two episodes, I believe
that's episode 160 and 161, goback, listen to those for more
of the nuts and bolts abouttaxes and tax planning, like
what I would do to prep andprepare, and also
emotional-wise.
(00:20):
This one is going to be more soabout like what your money
story actually reveals abouttaxes.
So this is going to be moredefinitely emotional based than
specific 3D tax planning stuff.
You know, for many of us thataren't regulated, right?
When it comes to taxes, taxseason has a way of stirring
(00:41):
those things up that are alreadywithin us.
You know, we have thesefeelings of stress and avoidance
and shame, not because it's taxseason.
Like tax season is just likemoney.
It just is.
It's neutral.
But what we are experiencing isour perception, our beliefs,
what is the emotions that arestored in our body.
That is why we feel not safeand not at ease when it comes to
(01:05):
taxes.
So in this episode, I'm goingto be talking about how your
money story actually shapes yourexperience with taxes and why
healing your relationship withmoney and taxes and everything
that involves around money andtaxes and all of the stuff
changes how you are going tomove through every financial
season in your life and also inyour business.
(01:28):
So let's dive in.
I want to give just a quickannouncement.
I am going to be having andbegin having monthly workshops
via Zoom.
I believe I'm going to startthem in December.
They're going to be intuitivelyled, just like this podcast.
I come up with ideas based oneither what I have experienced
in my own life, what I amcoaching clients through, and
(01:49):
what we have talked about.
And so whatever download that Iget for that month of what I
want to talk about, then that iswhat I'm going to decide how to
have these workshops.
So there will be a link in theshow notes that you can register
for.
That's not up yet at the timeof this release, but there will
be a landing page.
I'm working with my VA to getall of that prepped and ready
(02:11):
for you.
But you can be able to go tothe landing page.
You can see what the workshopis going to be about this month.
And I think for December, whatI'm going to start with is
talking, being able to talk toyour spouse around money,
because that has been, and youknow, when I asked in my
Facebook group, they all saidthey wanted to learn more about
how to speak to your spouse withmoney.
(02:32):
Actual physical workshop that Idid here in Boise, a lot of
them had questions and we reallyspent a lot of time on speaking
to your spouse and how do youenergetically approach money
with your spouse.
So I think that's what I'mgoing to have for that first
workshop in December.
And then moving forward, like Imentioned, it'll be whatever
(02:52):
download I get, whatever I'msensing that, you know, the
collective needs to hear inregards to money.
That's what I will have theworkshop on.
So stay tuned for that.
Keep an eye out in the shownotes.
That way you can just click thelink and then you can register
and then come to the to theworkshop.
And it is going to be onlineand it will be Zoom.
(03:16):
So let's talk about how so manyof us have been taught or we
have absorbed messages, or thiscan also be, you know,
generationally passed downaround maybe not being good with
math, maybe that we aren'tnumbers people, or you know,
(03:36):
that someone else knows betterthan we do about our business or
money or taxes.
And so we outsource our powerand we outsource our decision
making to them.
And I just want to say this isall BS.
Like, I don't believe anybodyis bad with math.
It is a thought, it is abelief.
I know a lot of us might havebeen taught that growing up.
(03:58):
And I do really think that thatshapes how we think and feel
about ourselves and ourself-esteem and our
self-concept.
I'm going to be the first todefend you because we are not
taught finances in school.
In college, you're not, it'snot a requirement.
Like I took, I think six toeight classes specifically for
(04:20):
my CFP, my certified financialplanning degree.
That was above and beyond thefinancial, like I got a BA in
finance.
So I had to take financialclasses and then I had to take
very specific financial planningclasses.
And I think out of all of thoseclasses, so think about, you
know, what's 15 hours a semesterfor four semesters, basically
(04:41):
your upper upper level, youknow, like your junior and
senior year.
So if I had 60 hours plusanother six or eight in
financial planning, I think Ihad like one class on personal
finance.
Thankfully, the teacher was sofun.
She was like a realtor fromWisconsin, and she made that
class so fun.
A lot of it I already knewbecause I had, you know, like
(05:02):
I've mentioned, grown up aroundmy dad.
He helped me do a lot ofunderstanding with personal
finance and balancing checkbooksand things like that.
But it really pays to have goodteachers, fun teachers, and
also, you know, this is just notstuff that is taught in
schools.
And if you have been here for awhile, you know my views on
(05:23):
school systems.
This is done on purpose.
This is done to keep the massesfeeling disempowered, to have
them feeling not aware or notknowledgeable about money
because money is another waythat we can control people if
you don't know about money inmoney systems.
(05:43):
And so this is not, I say allthat to say this is not your
fault.
This is done by more, how do Iwant to use this word, elite
people that know exactly whatthey're doing.
So give yourself a little bitof a break, give yourself some
grace and recognize that a lotof women and men don't
(06:05):
necessarily know about money andwe aren't being taught, and
that is done on purpose.
So when you throw all themessages, you know, when you
when you throw in what we havebeen taught culturally or
societally, you know, and how wehave been kept from knowing
about money on purpose, you takethat, and then you throw in all
(06:28):
those messages that we havereceived.
At least I'm talking more US,but I know from some of my
research this this expandsbeyond.
This is a global thing as well.
You know, you take that inaddition to taxes, right?
And the fear-mongering that hasoccurred with belief systems
around the IRS and attorneys andCPAs.
(06:49):
You know, it's no wonder thatso many of us are terrified of
taxes and tax season.
And when you think about it,when you have this story, when
you have these feelings in yourbody, when you have these
patterns that are in your body,what might look like
procrastination from the outsidemight actually be flight in
(07:12):
your nervous system.
It might be the flight, youknow, when I talk about fight,
flight, freeze, likeprocrastination, avoidance is
more of like a flight in yournervous system.
What looks like not opening themail or calling your CPA, that
might be a flight or a freezeresponse.
So I just want you to be awarethat think about what your
(07:33):
actions are, think of them assymptoms from an empowered place
of like, oh, okay, so if everytime I sit down or I say I'm
gonna sit down and I'm gonnalook at this and I don't, maybe
it's not willpower.
Maybe it's not actuallyanything to do with my mindset.
Maybe, and it could be maybe alittle bit of mindset, but maybe
there's actually somethingdeeper here in my body that my
(07:56):
body is holding on to that istrying to keep me safe and it
has a story and it has a patternand it has emotions in my body
that are protecting me that arenot wanting me to look at taxes.
So I want you to look at itfrom that view versus why can't
I just sit down and look at mytaxes?
Why can't I just call my CPA?
(08:17):
Why can't I just take care ofthis?
Like so often women say thesephrases to me.
And I'm like, listen, like,first of all, where's the
where's the calm and the and thesweetness that you need in this
moment, right?
Like asking yourself that isn'tcoming from curiosity.
It's almost like beatingyourself up.
So give yourself a little bitof grace, a little bit of space,
(08:38):
and recognize like maybe thereare that this goes deeper than
just the mindset stuff here.
And I also want to say as wellthat there's maybe one or two
that come to mind, but most ofthe CPAs that I've worked with,
bookkeepers, they aren'temotionally aware that this is
actually what's going on.
Like when I bring it to theirattention, they say, Oh, wow,
(08:59):
Erin, yes, that is true.
That is how my clientsexperience this.
That is how they act, but theyaren't connecting the dots that
clients not looking at theirbooks, clients not keeping their
appointments with me.
Oh, this is something deeperthan just taking the action.
This is an emotional thinghere.
They're not making thatconnection.
And so I just want you to beaware that, you know, that is
(09:24):
also what we're working withhere.
Like you're we aren't yet, yet,I say yet on purpose, because I
do believe we are changing as acollective, as a society.
But I would say right now,where we are in 2025 at Q4 2025,
a large majority of CPAs andbookkeepers are not aware that
(09:47):
this is actually what'shappening.
And so they can't guide you andprovide you the support that
you need because they aren'taware that this is actually the
root cause of what's going on.
That this is like your actionsare a symptom, and there's the
root causes really coming backto like money beliefs, money
(10:07):
stories, what does your bodyfeel safe or not safe with?
So this isn't about yourability.
This is not about being smartor not being smart or having the
knowledge or not having theknowledge.
Like all of that is a byproductof feeling safe first.
And so I want to encourage you,if this is you, this is some of
(10:28):
the work that I do with myclients.
Yes, we do get into thenitty-gritty of the actual
money, but it's the emotionalpart that we have to take care
of first.
And then the nitty-gritty, youknow, is comes so much more
easily.
So if that is something thatyou are interested in, curious
of how I can support you, clickthe link in the show notes,
(10:50):
schedule a call with me, and wecan talk about how I can be of
service to you.
So when you think about safety,think about if something that
really scared you, because Ithink we look at safety and
we're like, money, safety, no,that's not really, yes, it is.
It's another thing, right?
So think about another area ofyour life where you don't feel
(11:10):
safe with.
You probably, your body, youknow, like if you have been in a
car accident, there was, youmay not feel as safe to get in a
car with someone else becausethat is your body's way of
protecting you.
So just recognize that money,all of these different
circumstances that we have,money is just another
(11:32):
circumstance where our bodiesmay not feel safe.
And if we don't feel safe, thenwe cannot create an environment
to feel knowledgeable, smart,able, and capable.
Like safety has to come first.
So I want you to think abouttaxes as just being like the
trigger or the catalyst thatactivates what is already inside
(11:53):
of you.
So, like I already mentioned,taxes are just neutral.
But if you are avoiding things,if you are, you know, running
from theoretically speaking,then that is an opportunity for
you to see like, oh, this isdeeper than just, you know, I'm
not looking at my taxes.
It's showing you where you arecurrently with your money, your
(12:16):
money relationship, your moneystory, and your body.
Like the body has to feel safefirst and foremost before we can
move forward, you know, and wecan only go as quickly as we
feel safe to do so.
So I talk about in previousepisodes about like your window
of tolerance and think aboutyour nervous system like a
(12:36):
rubber band.
So if right now expanding yournervous system, like think about
expanding that rubber band, ifpulling your fingers apart all
the way feels like too much,then you have to be aware of
that.
You have to be mindful and youhave to do the somatic work so
that you can expand your nervoussystem and your window of
(12:57):
tolerance.
But going from zero to ahundred isn't necessarily kind
to your nervous system.
Zero to one might be what youcan handle today, right?
And so it's this constanteffort of working towards it and
releasing as well as creatingnew beliefs alongside of it.
(13:18):
So just notice what your firstreaction is when you think about
taxes.
Think about what your bodydoes.
Does it tense up?
Like I told you in the previousepisode about my experience
with taxes and how I used tofreeze when I would see an IRS
letter, even if it was just tochange my address.
So just recognize what are youfeeling in your body?
(13:39):
You probably might be, I'm nota you know, therapist or
psychologist, but you probablyare in your fight, flight,
freeze response.
And this takes slowing down.
This takes noticing what isgoing on in your nervous system.
I think so often it's like wedon't like the feeling, so we
just want to get away from it.
It's like, oh, I see an IRS orI see taxes that I need to do
(14:01):
taxes.
I'm just not gonna do it.
I'm gonna go shop.
I'm gonna go watch TV, I'mgonna go have a drink, I'm gonna
go wind down and, you know,watch TV or whatever it might
be, versus hang on a second,what's going on here?
I'm here for you, body.
I love you.
You know, talking to yourselfkindly and lovingly and being
like, okay, what are you feelingin this moment?
(14:23):
Like, what does that littlefive, 10-year-old, 12-year-old
little girl need in this moment?
That is the work that we needto be doing, not just like, oh,
I feel this, I don't want tofeel this.
Okay, I'm gonna go do somethingelse.
So I would ask myself, like toget clear and clarity, like
whose voice is this?
Like a question I always askmyself is, is this energy even
mine?
And I hear my intuition.
(14:45):
And so what I hear sometimes isyes, and sometimes I hear no.
Like some of this isgenerational, some of this is
societal, some of this is how wejust as a society with women
and with money, you know, someof this is cultural.
It could be from your parents,it could be from your teachers.
Like there's so much that itcould you have picked up, you
(15:06):
know, money and taxes withyourself.
So just recognizing and askingyourself and naming like, is
this energy mine?
Is this because of my beliefs?
And it can be a little bit ofyours, but I think I read
somewhere like 97, 98, 99 of ourthoughts.
I don't know exactly, but like90, let's just say 97% of our
(15:26):
thoughts, they're not even ours.
Meaning it's not ones that wethought up ourselves, it's it's
ones that we have received fromand absorbed in our environment.
So just recognizing that youmight have beliefs around taxes
that you may not even be awareof because you haven't given
yourself the opportunity to sitdown and just listen and journal
(15:50):
on what your beliefs are andwhere you picked up these
beliefs.
I always go back to somaticwork.
Like, what somatic work do youwant to do to support yourself?
Some clients can just noticewhen they feel that energy and
then they can like pay attentionto the energy and shift it.
Some, like I mentioned, I likeemotional release therapy.
Maybe you like breath work ortapping or culmination of all of
(16:13):
these or none of these, andsomething else works for you.
But you've got to practice andplay with what somatic
practices.
How are you gonna get into thebody and embody a different way
of being with taxes?
And sometimes that meansletting go, sometimes that means
letting go and creating newbeliefs, sometimes it's just
creating new beliefs.
But like, how are you going totake care of yourself and your
(16:37):
body during this time when youare noticing some of this stuff
come up?
And then obviously it'schoosing a new perspective, a
new way of being, a newself-concept.
And I would spend a lot of mytime here as well.
Like, I don't want to say one'smore important than the other,
they're all important, but howyou think about yourself, what
(17:00):
you action you are taking fromthat place, like I have a mentor
that says every act is an actof self-def definition, meaning
that every opportunity, everycircumstance is an opportunity
for you to define who you are inthis moment.
So if you are someone who isdeciding that they want to be
(17:20):
confident and calm with taxes,and every time that opportunity
presents to you, you don't lookat it, you don't do the somatic
work, you don't do the thingsthat you need to do to feel calm
and confident.
You're not embodying someonewho is wanting to feel calm and
confident with their taxes andtheir money.
So we have opportunities day inand day out to define who we
(17:42):
are, our new state of being.
And so asking yourself, am Iacting from that place?
You know, what would you loveto believe?
What would serve you and yourbusiness best?
Like really getting clear onwhat are those some of those
deep core beliefs that you needto embody and embodying those.
So when I say embody, what doesthat actually mean?
(18:03):
It means thinking a new beliefand then taking action from that
place.
Taxes are neutral, money isneutral, business is neutral,
but you deciding how do I wantto think and feel about my taxes
and my butt money and mybusiness, that is what you have
control over.
So some things that I had to gofrom is like I had to go from
(18:27):
where I was to just neutrality.
Like I just had to start sayinglike taxes are neutral, just
like the sun is neutral, justlike the ocean is neutral, so
are taxes.
I had to say things like I'm ahuman that's running a business,
and millions of other humansrun a business as well.
And if they can do it, I can doit because we all came from the
(18:48):
same source.
You know, like just think aboutit's you're gonna have to play
with this, but like whatever newperspective and stories you
want to create for you that aresupportive, that's what you're
gonna have to think about andthen decide on and then embody,
you know, make sure that they'reempowering and helping you
build the business and the lifethat you want.
Over time, tax season is goingto become less of a threat, more
(19:13):
of a reflection, more neutral.
And ultimately, I would love toget it to a place of like more
fun.
Like, how fun would it be if weall got to connect during tax
season and talk about how muchmoney we were paying in taxes
because of all the money that wepaid in, or how much money that
our CPA has been able to helpus save in taxes, because
(19:34):
there's different ways that theycould help us do that because
of all the money we made.
Like that's the that's the funstuff that I want us to be
talking about.
That is where I want us to getto to that place.
So thinking about that, all ofthat is going to change, not
because taxes have changed, notbecause tax season changes, but
because you changed, becauseyour perception changed, because
(19:56):
the way you viewed yourself andyour self-concept and you as a
business owner has changed.
It becomes, I always look atall of these little moments, is
every single moment is anopportunity for me to practice
safety and noticing what mynervous system is doing and how
(20:17):
calibrated I am and whatfrequency I am on.
And just think of it like atraining partner, you know, it's
it's an opportunity for you tosee and check in where you are
with your nervous system, howcalm you feel, what is, you
know, maybe still triggeringyou, or maybe not as much, but
it still is, but that's progresstoo.
(20:37):
So just think about and playwith like, how can these
circumstances be opportunitiesfor me to check in and see like
how far I have come, how muchwork I have done on myself, and
how that has actually shiftedbecause of that.
Okay, I think I'm done with thetax series.
(20:57):
If you have anything else ontaxes that you want me to talk
about or teach on, I'd be happyto do that.
Send me an email at it's notat.
So it's just support atgenerate a life well lived.
And I can do other tax episodesfor you.
But I think that the three thatI've got that feels pretty good
(21:18):
in terms of the emotional side,the actual nitty gritty of like
what are the actual tasks youneed to do for taxes and then
also your money story.
Okay, as always, I'm rootingfor you.
I'm looking forward to seeingsome of you on workshops that
I'll be hosting starting inDecember.
And I thank you for listeningand tuning in every week.
And I'll see you in the nextepisode.
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