November 30, 2025 • 16 mins
Today on the pod we're joined by ACC Head G Lane, who stuck around after the radio show to talk through some of the more memorable promos he worked on back in the day. Why did he get banned from the Manukau Harbour?
Hang on... these guys do a radio show?
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
You're planting in the chair. Cheer.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
We're doing this.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Yeah, we're doing it.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
We're doing it.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
Welcome along to the podcast Monday, the birst of December.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Can I just watch in the corner please, there's a
cheer here for that.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
No, that's not that's not what that cheers for.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
It looks like it.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
It's not a look.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
It's like Jimmy Seval. Okay, if it looks like a
pedophile acts like a pedophile, chances that it's a pedophile.
If you've got a chair in the corner of the
room that no one's sitting on.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
This is exactly what they were worried about.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
It quacks like a duck, walks like a duck. It's
a cock.
Speaker 3 (00:43):
How funny you say that, because I'm down in Wellington
and there is literally a cheer and it's the corner
of the bo I'm in the corner studio, which is
in the corner of the building here, and then there
is a chair in the corner of the corner of
this of the studio here.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
I'll see if you can oh yeah, oh yeah, that yes,
it's a nice chair man. That's quite a nice.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Do you think Nick Tansey comes in and watches them
do his show.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Not after what you did to him.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
I didn't do that, hang on, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Not after what you did.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
I think it was just a coincidence between me arriving
and managing that station and him losing his job.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
He's he's gone on to great things since that. I
think you did him a favor.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Look he's gone on Christmas. He does christ He also
does the Christmas Big Christmas Show down there in Wellington.
Great musician Nick Tense. They great on the keys. Yeah,
he's got great pipes as well. It's great on the keyboard.
So you know, he's he's gone on to his passions.
He was.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
He was sensational in the with a Bucket on your
Head show. I thought that was. He was amazing on
that show.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Yeah. Great Now and about Guy, you know he was
the o g out and about guy. Was it was Ginger? No,
maybe maybe Ginger, Yeah, skin skin of a Ginger. He
was part of the Poll and Grant shows, Poly Grant.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
He was about the Morning crew, the City Morning.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
I'm looking at a poster of them here on the wall. Yeah,
there's Grant with a it's his grantee and it's him
like in a Rocky.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
This may have been your Was this your as well
before me?
Speaker 3 (02:22):
That poly fiction?
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (02:24):
And then rubbish dump yeap.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
That the poly fiction one is some of something of nightmares.
But I've seen that one. I know exactly what you're
looking at this year.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
And then Grantee, he's looking good. I mean the body's good.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
Well, he was a former bodybuilder. He did it. He
did it actually seriously. Yeah, that's he wrote me into
doing it, but I didn't take it very sex at all.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Now did he get Jonah into it? Yes?
Speaker 1 (02:50):
Yeah, right, yeah, he used to train with us Jonah yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Yes, is that pre or post kidneys?
Speaker 1 (02:57):
It was post kidney but he used to train with us.
And it was one of the weirdest moments in my life.
It was that after the competition, so the humiliation was
complete from me, and we were out having dinner at
what's that? What's the kind of American restaurant that kind
of has gone bus? There's Big Meals? What's it called
loans there? It was a Lone Star in Wellington. It's
not there anymore, but I was. We all went to
(03:17):
Lone Star and I think Grant and Polly and all
that were at one table, and we had one another
table with my friends and Jonah came swaggering in and
came over to my table and gave me the full
dabb oh and my just silenced the table and I
was like, and they went, what the fuck? What the fuck?
Where did Jennaline me come over and debut at? I
was like, we trained together?
Speaker 2 (03:39):
What year this, Joe?
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Joe? What year was it? It was there was the
same year as the humiliated bodybuilding humiliation, so early two thousands.
Just I think he was about a couple of years
after the kidney. Yeah, he was pretty tight with with
(04:03):
Grantee still.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Yeah, yeah, and evidently wow, yeah, bro, it was.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
A nice guy. They didn't have to come over and
do that. It made my day in terms of all
my friends going what.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
Body buildings.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Together?
Speaker 3 (04:21):
It's crazy because I mean, you had that table beside
you with Nick Tansley and Polly and Grant on it,
and nobody was asking you about the fact that your
mates were.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
Had been fired by he was he was, he was gone.
It was it was it was Mark Hot Dreads. Yeah,
he's rolling the dreads.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
I remember new hot guy.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:43):
I did a little half assed radio school thing and
they brought a new hot guy to talk.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
To us about it. Who jesus there any money in it,
new hot guy? How long are you gonna?
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Sorry? I thought you meant that he asked for money
to come into radio.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Well he did.
Speaker 4 (04:57):
That's what initially took me off. They may not be
his money in it, but I was like, at what
point did they stop calling you a new hot guy?
Is it when you're no longer new?
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Because I don't think he liked that name.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
No, I don't think you did.
Speaker 4 (05:13):
I think I think it sets standards way too high
because on radio, people are picturing the hottest guy they
possibly can.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
So then they meet him and they're like, and look,
he's a hot guy.
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (05:22):
I think we can all agree on that. But yeah,
you're setting yourself up for failure. Ben, new hot guy
was that when you were working down there? Was that
when you did the naked on the boat.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Prom No, that was that was up in Auckland. That
was That was well as a world first, actually another
pointless world first, the first ever full nude supporters boat
in the America's Cup. We hired a fishing boat that
happened to be up in the harbor that was usually
domicile down there in Stuart Island and the skipper was
I turned around at one stage when we were out
there all nude, turn around and he was sucking on
(05:53):
the end of the biggest bomb I've ever seen. It
was he He wasn't new, thank god, because he was
salty man. And the boat we went down below and
a fucking stunk because it used to be they use
it for mutton birdings, so that stack it with a
mutton burst and it was had. It had like a
(06:14):
There was about fifteen of us on their full nude
and they didn't go down overly well with the authorities,
and we were immediately surrounded by by harbourmaster and then
immediately by about four police boats.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Is it a crime to be nude on a boat?
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Well apparently so. So we were escorted back into Viaduct
Harbor with a police escort a dangerously baked skipper, salty
old skipper, and it pulled up and the police boarded
the boat. Myself Nean Stables headed downstairs in the engine room.
Cow you, coward, and they eventually left after everyone got
(06:53):
their close back on and departed, and then we were
given a two year ben from the Viaduct trespassword.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
Okay, so you weren't really out in the harbor, you
were in the vibe.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
No, No, we did go out, but the problem was
again something we shouldn't have done is we did a
lap of honor. Yeh, yeah, we did a lap of
honor of the viaduct before we went out. So we
went down in front of what you know now is
like Sonalis and Doctor Rudy's the and the golf place.
We're in there and we did a lap. In the end,
we're all full nude on the boat waving to everyone,
(07:24):
and unfortunately for us, there was a genormous primary school
group who had just got off the bus and that's
what caused the issues, because the complaints came in thick
and fast. Then we went out to the America's Cup
with this old fishing mutton bird boat that was like rubbing,
rubbing next to massive launches and everything, and then we
(07:47):
got the escort back.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Was there also an element of the unhoused.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
Yeah, there was a Yeah. Unfortunately we went out on
the radio and see to come and join us this
full note beers all day. Word got around the unhoused
community pretty quickly that there was free perss available if
you've got your KT off. So we had a couple
of units on there, what do they give a fuck?
They didn't care. They were nude immediately and had a
small situation when one of them was going to jump
(08:11):
off the boat halfway back, which we had just had
to restrain him for a moment.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
You were restraining and naked.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
What you said allegations that was there was a child
that was conceived that I heard that there were they
called boat children, and yeah they were part of that.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Well, who know, the promotion Ian Stables was a very
fertile man. But I can't confirm or deny that. But
they were different times, guys, they were different times. Look,
yeah they.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
Were the same times.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
No, they were at the same time.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
There were different times. I think they were.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
I can kind of see what the cops are because like,
so you guys have come at all fifteen of you
have flashed the Auckland viauct.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Not flash were full nude.
Speaker 4 (08:52):
Yeah, but like, how is that any different than just
standing on the on the footpath. You've basically done the
same thing. Like that would not be that would not
be tolerated at all. But because you're floating on a boat.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
Yeah, I know there was a few things. If we
hadn't done the Lap of Honor, I think we would
have got away with it because we would have gone
out with all the other boats.
Speaker 4 (09:10):
Yeah yeah, yeah, and someone would have seen you out
on the book.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
I'm not going to call the cops on you.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
No, no, no, there was a lot. There was a lot
of like a lot of the other boats just sounding
the horns and waving and laughing and taking photos. Like Yeah,
I think it was a bit of a it was
a bit of a circus, harmless fun. But yeah, it
was just that school group that did cause a few issues.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Yeah, you would have got away with it.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
If it was middling kids coming from out of town
to watch the America's Cup.
Speaker 4 (09:34):
Should take it, should take a quick break and then
come back on. Here's more ill advised promos.
Speaker 1 (09:40):
I've got so many.
Speaker 4 (09:48):
Does anything stick out from your time in Wellington? Any
Wellington promos? That right?
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Obviously there's the body building.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
Oh no, there was one big one that win a
rye was when we decided to do the Great New
Zealand Caravan Race. So what this was was we commande
had five caravans and the idea was you had to
hitchhike with your caravan from in the cargo to Auckland.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
So people have to pull up and hit your trailer.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Yeah, so you've got to not only you have to
hitch a ride, you've got to convince them to then
put a put a caravan on the back.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Many people came to do that. Yeah, there was ten.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
Grand prize, ten grand cash and max and we had
but I mean to pick you up with the trailer. Yeah,
there was quite a few because it was alive on
the radio, so people knew they were coming. And you're
only allowed to tow them for a maximum of two
hours and then you had to drop them off again.
And so we had to have every there was people
in Peers and then we had an observer with them
(10:43):
that was making sure they were following the rules. So
great idea. The great news on caravan race. You know
people were like hiding their caravan and the lay by
hitchhike and then wheeling it out putting it on the
back of cass.
Speaker 4 (10:55):
I had had a couple of German tourists to a
similar trick to me. Yeah, they left the smoke show.
German tourist out on the side of and then two
dudes pop up out of a bush.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
Yeah, well this good. This had a disastrous start. So
we put the caravans on the back of a train
from I think we sourced them from Topol, which is
a big caravan hub. Apparently, stuck them on a train
all the way down to in Chicago and they got
unloaded down there. We met them down there, We flew
a run down, gave them a briefing the night before
we'd have to get to to the sky tower. Yeah,
(11:28):
and the hike with a caravan and it couldn't have
gone off to a worse start. So all the teams
were central in for cargo. They all seemed to get
rides pretty easily. And then the sky pulled up in
this old white Ford Falcon that was lowered, the towbar
was just about on the floor and picked up these
these two winners and they departed and I was like, oh, okay,
(11:51):
I don't know how that's going to got.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
A bad vibe from him.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
Yeah, I got a bad vibe from that. And then
an hour later I got a phone call from the
guy that was working for is the Observer, and he goes,
we've got a problem we've got a problem. It's flipped.
And I was like what what He goes it's flipped,
and I was like, oh shit. So I got in
the was for Zidium at the time. I got on
the Zidim thunder and I left of the cargol and
(12:13):
I just immediately hit a massive line of traffic that
I was and so I thought it so I went
on the wrong side of the road and I just
drove on the wrong side of the road. So I
knew that because I was on the phone to him.
Came over the bridge. The hell and I don't know
if you've seen what happens to a caravan when it
was involved in a crash. It disintegrated.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Oh yeah, it's made out of bolts of wood.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
So there's this there's this ford falcon. It's jackknife down
a hill. So it's gone down the hill too fast
and lost. The back of the caravan started swaying and
then at jackknife flipped the caravan. The caravan has disintegrated
all over the road. Sudden, Were they in the caravan? No, No,
they were in the car They were a bit shaken, obviously,
(12:54):
but shaken. But you know, no social media back then,
so you just got I just talked to the fire
bagade there. They swept everything to the side. I checked
the winners in the back of my thunder dramed to
the airport, flew them home, just went everything'll be fine
and yeah, and then had to carry on the rest
of them because the other four teams were leaguing it
to christ so I had to catch up to them
(13:16):
and then just worry about dealing with the insurance issues
of this caravan. Brand new caravan too, a brand new
and just completely totaled within the first ten minutes of
the Was it a promo for caravans, No, it wasn't it.
Al and P sponsored it. It was the L and
P Great Great New Zealand Caravan Race.
Speaker 3 (13:33):
And I think it's a long way, like it's a
long way to drive from the cargo to Auckland. Yeah,
to get a caravan, how long did it take a week?
Speaker 1 (13:42):
They had a week to do it, so they did it.
I think they did it in four days. They got
they got to the sky tower. You had to knock
off at six o'clock every night, so we didn't have
any night driving or anything. So it was a purely
daytime activity and.
Speaker 2 (13:53):
Just get dropped off wherever you are and sleep in
the caravan.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
Yeah, we would mainly get him to the Senescen put
Off motel and stuff. But yeah, that was a complete
and utter disaster dealing with it. So ringing the caravan
company and saying, hey, you know that one of the
caravan you gave is it's disintegrated on the side of
the road just north of Thembicago.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
I just had a nightcaps there was the.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Red Yeah, that could have gone real bed. Yeah, that's
kind of That's probably the closest I've come to a
serious injury.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
It sounds like it's such a good idea. Yeah, it
sounds like such a good idea, but as you found out,
it can go really badly wrong.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Get there in first gear? Was there other one? So
we bought five cars, old cars and you it was
a race from Auckland to Wellington, but you couldn't leave
first gear. That got shut the day before the police
rang me.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
They got hold of it.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
They got hold of it. Oh shit, Yeah, they got
hold of me as well, and see like we're going
to hold you personally liable if there's any accents. I
was okay with it. The company wasn't.
Speaker 4 (14:54):
Yeah, but that it's like the remember we did the
one and that was.
Speaker 1 (14:58):
It was around We did it around Pocket.
Speaker 4 (15:00):
Yeah, Poko Raceway and we got about six second hand
cars and we drained the tanks and then we were
like go and it was who could do the most
laps of with no gas and first gear and first
gear and.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Yeah on going Yondo.
Speaker 4 (15:15):
They couldn't quite properly fully drain the tanks. They had
no idea how much gas was in there, and they
just kept going. We were sitting out at Puckaco for
a whole fucking day, but basically everyone else had crashed
out and these guys were still going.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
We had a good fire. One caught fire and caught fire. Yeah,
it was good.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
There was a whole the whole day out there, and
this Hyondo was still going at the end of the
day and.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
We're like, look, we all just give him the money.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
They give them the money.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (15:40):
There was another one where we ran a motorbike out again.
That was the one we split. It might have been
Handen Down one. We split the track into a roulette
wheel and we gave away each number to a different
listener and then ran the bike out of gas and
laps of it and wherever it broke down that they won.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
I think that was for a vape company. It was,
it was, it was for a new co a good
old days when it was put a weight money going around.
Speaker 4 (16:03):
And I got hold into the fucking health and safety
over that one because I hadn't put together any sort
of health and safety plan that like what if this
guy rocketed into the all things or something like that.
He was a professional driver, Yeah, and he was going
at about ten k's an hour. Yeah, he was running
out of gas.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
But yeah, oh good fun.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Yeah. Oh, there's there's so many others that I can
I can go through better. I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
If you want to want to go, we'll do it
on Friday.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Yeah, well it's the one. It's the one where we
flew to the Gold Coast just in ourspeedos. There was
a good time. Nothing else but intero terribly as well.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Two knockers pitch on the head. Yeah, please do it
again to
Speaker 1 (16:40):
Our please Okay, oh god, I take him back to
You're planting in the chair. Cheer.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
We're doing this.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Yeah, we're doing it.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
We're doing it.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
Welcome along to the podcast Monday, the birst of December.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Can I just watch in the corner please, there's a
cheer here for that.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
No, that's not that's not what that cheers for.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
It looks like it.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
It's not a look.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
It's like Jimmy Seval. Okay, if it looks like a
pedophile acts like a pedophile, chances that it's a pedophile.
If you've got a chair in the corner of the
room that no one's sitting on.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
This is exactly what they were worried about.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
It quacks like a duck, walks like a duck. It's
a cock.
Speaker 3 (00:43):
How funny you say that, because I'm down in Wellington
and there is literally a cheer and it's the corner
of the bo I'm in the corner studio, which is
in the corner of the building here, and then there
is a chair in the corner of the corner of
this of the studio here.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
I'll see if you can oh yeah, oh yeah, that yes,
it's a nice chair man. That's quite a nice.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Do you think Nick Tansey comes in and watches them
do his show.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Not after what you did to him.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
I didn't do that, hang on, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Not after what you did.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
I think it was just a coincidence between me arriving
and managing that station and him losing his job.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
He's he's gone on to great things since that. I
think you did him a favor.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Look he's gone on Christmas. He does christ He also
does the Christmas Big Christmas Show down there in Wellington.
Great musician Nick Tense. They great on the keys. Yeah,
he's got great pipes as well. It's great on the keyboard.
So you know, he's he's gone on to his passions.
He was.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
He was sensational in the with a Bucket on your
Head show. I thought that was. He was amazing on
that show.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Yeah. Great Now and about Guy, you know he was
the o g out and about guy. Was it was Ginger? No,
maybe maybe Ginger, Yeah, skin skin of a Ginger. He
was part of the Poll and Grant shows, Poly Grant.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
He was about the Morning crew, the City Morning.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
I'm looking at a poster of them here on the wall. Yeah,
there's Grant with a it's his grantee and it's him
like in a Rocky.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
This may have been your Was this your as well
before me?
Speaker 3 (02:22):
That poly fiction?
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (02:24):
And then rubbish dump yeap.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
That the poly fiction one is some of something of nightmares.
But I've seen that one. I know exactly what you're
looking at this year.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
And then Grantee, he's looking good. I mean the body's good.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
Well, he was a former bodybuilder. He did it. He
did it actually seriously. Yeah, that's he wrote me into
doing it, but I didn't take it very sex at all.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Now did he get Jonah into it? Yes?
Speaker 1 (02:50):
Yeah, right, yeah, he used to train with us Jonah yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Yes, is that pre or post kidneys?
Speaker 1 (02:57):
It was post kidney but he used to train with us.
And it was one of the weirdest moments in my life.
It was that after the competition, so the humiliation was
complete from me, and we were out having dinner at
what's that? What's the kind of American restaurant that kind
of has gone bus? There's Big Meals? What's it called
loans there? It was a Lone Star in Wellington. It's
not there anymore, but I was. We all went to
(03:17):
Lone Star and I think Grant and Polly and all
that were at one table, and we had one another
table with my friends and Jonah came swaggering in and
came over to my table and gave me the full
dabb oh and my just silenced the table and I
was like, and they went, what the fuck? What the fuck?
Where did Jennaline me come over and debut at? I
was like, we trained together?
Speaker 2 (03:39):
What year this, Joe?
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Joe? What year was it? It was there was the
same year as the humiliated bodybuilding humiliation, so early two thousands.
Just I think he was about a couple of years
after the kidney. Yeah, he was pretty tight with with
(04:03):
Grantee still.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Yeah, yeah, and evidently wow, yeah, bro, it was.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
A nice guy. They didn't have to come over and
do that. It made my day in terms of all
my friends going what.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
Body buildings.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Together?
Speaker 3 (04:21):
It's crazy because I mean, you had that table beside
you with Nick Tansley and Polly and Grant on it,
and nobody was asking you about the fact that your
mates were.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
Had been fired by he was he was, he was gone.
It was it was it was Mark Hot Dreads. Yeah,
he's rolling the dreads.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
I remember new hot guy.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:43):
I did a little half assed radio school thing and
they brought a new hot guy to talk.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
To us about it. Who jesus there any money in it,
new hot guy? How long are you gonna?
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Sorry? I thought you meant that he asked for money
to come into radio.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Well he did.
Speaker 4 (04:57):
That's what initially took me off. They may not be
his money in it, but I was like, at what
point did they stop calling you a new hot guy?
Is it when you're no longer new?
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Because I don't think he liked that name.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
No, I don't think you did.
Speaker 4 (05:13):
I think I think it sets standards way too high
because on radio, people are picturing the hottest guy they
possibly can.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
So then they meet him and they're like, and look,
he's a hot guy.
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (05:22):
I think we can all agree on that. But yeah,
you're setting yourself up for failure. Ben, new hot guy
was that when you were working down there? Was that
when you did the naked on the boat.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Prom No, that was that was up in Auckland. That
was That was well as a world first, actually another
pointless world first, the first ever full nude supporters boat
in the America's Cup. We hired a fishing boat that
happened to be up in the harbor that was usually
domicile down there in Stuart Island and the skipper was
I turned around at one stage when we were out
there all nude, turn around and he was sucking on
(05:53):
the end of the biggest bomb I've ever seen. It
was he He wasn't new, thank god, because he was
salty man. And the boat we went down below and
a fucking stunk because it used to be they use
it for mutton birdings, so that stack it with a
mutton burst and it was had. It had like a
(06:14):
There was about fifteen of us on their full nude
and they didn't go down overly well with the authorities,
and we were immediately surrounded by by harbourmaster and then
immediately by about four police boats.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Is it a crime to be nude on a boat?
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Well apparently so. So we were escorted back into Viaduct
Harbor with a police escort a dangerously baked skipper, salty
old skipper, and it pulled up and the police boarded
the boat. Myself Nean Stables headed downstairs in the engine room.
Cow you, coward, and they eventually left after everyone got
(06:53):
their close back on and departed, and then we were
given a two year ben from the Viaduct trespassword.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
Okay, so you weren't really out in the harbor, you
were in the vibe.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
No, No, we did go out, but the problem was
again something we shouldn't have done is we did a
lap of honor. Yeh, yeah, we did a lap of
honor of the viaduct before we went out. So we
went down in front of what you know now is
like Sonalis and Doctor Rudy's the and the golf place.
We're in there and we did a lap. In the end,
we're all full nude on the boat waving to everyone,
(07:24):
and unfortunately for us, there was a genormous primary school
group who had just got off the bus and that's
what caused the issues, because the complaints came in thick
and fast. Then we went out to the America's Cup
with this old fishing mutton bird boat that was like rubbing,
rubbing next to massive launches and everything, and then we
(07:47):
got the escort back.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Was there also an element of the unhoused.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
Yeah, there was a Yeah. Unfortunately we went out on
the radio and see to come and join us this
full note beers all day. Word got around the unhoused
community pretty quickly that there was free perss available if
you've got your KT off. So we had a couple
of units on there, what do they give a fuck?
They didn't care. They were nude immediately and had a
small situation when one of them was going to jump
(08:11):
off the boat halfway back, which we had just had
to restrain him for a moment.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
You were restraining and naked.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
What you said allegations that was there was a child
that was conceived that I heard that there were they
called boat children, and yeah they were part of that.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Well, who know, the promotion Ian Stables was a very
fertile man. But I can't confirm or deny that. But
they were different times, guys, they were different times. Look,
yeah they.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
Were the same times.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
No, they were at the same time.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
There were different times. I think they were.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
I can kind of see what the cops are because like,
so you guys have come at all fifteen of you
have flashed the Auckland viauct.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Not flash were full nude.
Speaker 4 (08:52):
Yeah, but like, how is that any different than just
standing on the on the footpath. You've basically done the
same thing. Like that would not be that would not
be tolerated at all. But because you're floating on a boat.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
Yeah, I know there was a few things. If we
hadn't done the Lap of Honor, I think we would
have got away with it because we would have gone
out with all the other boats.
Speaker 4 (09:10):
Yeah yeah, yeah, and someone would have seen you out
on the book.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
I'm not going to call the cops on you.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
No, no, no, there was a lot. There was a lot
of like a lot of the other boats just sounding
the horns and waving and laughing and taking photos. Like Yeah,
I think it was a bit of a it was
a bit of a circus, harmless fun. But yeah, it
was just that school group that did cause a few issues.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Yeah, you would have got away with it.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
If it was middling kids coming from out of town
to watch the America's Cup.
Speaker 4 (09:34):
Should take it, should take a quick break and then
come back on. Here's more ill advised promos.
Speaker 1 (09:40):
I've got so many.
Speaker 4 (09:48):
Does anything stick out from your time in Wellington? Any
Wellington promos? That right?
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Obviously there's the body building.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
Oh no, there was one big one that win a
rye was when we decided to do the Great New
Zealand Caravan Race. So what this was was we commande
had five caravans and the idea was you had to
hitchhike with your caravan from in the cargo to Auckland.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
So people have to pull up and hit your trailer.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Yeah, so you've got to not only you have to
hitch a ride, you've got to convince them to then
put a put a caravan on the back.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Many people came to do that. Yeah, there was ten.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
Grand prize, ten grand cash and max and we had
but I mean to pick you up with the trailer. Yeah,
there was quite a few because it was alive on
the radio, so people knew they were coming. And you're
only allowed to tow them for a maximum of two
hours and then you had to drop them off again.
And so we had to have every there was people
in Peers and then we had an observer with them
(10:43):
that was making sure they were following the rules. So
great idea. The great news on caravan race. You know
people were like hiding their caravan and the lay by
hitchhike and then wheeling it out putting it on the
back of cass.
Speaker 4 (10:55):
I had had a couple of German tourists to a
similar trick to me. Yeah, they left the smoke show.
German tourist out on the side of and then two
dudes pop up out of a bush.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
Yeah, well this good. This had a disastrous start. So
we put the caravans on the back of a train
from I think we sourced them from Topol, which is
a big caravan hub. Apparently, stuck them on a train
all the way down to in Chicago and they got
unloaded down there. We met them down there, We flew
a run down, gave them a briefing the night before
we'd have to get to to the sky tower. Yeah,
(11:28):
and the hike with a caravan and it couldn't have
gone off to a worse start. So all the teams
were central in for cargo. They all seemed to get
rides pretty easily. And then the sky pulled up in
this old white Ford Falcon that was lowered, the towbar
was just about on the floor and picked up these
these two winners and they departed and I was like, oh, okay,
(11:51):
I don't know how that's going to got.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
A bad vibe from him.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
Yeah, I got a bad vibe from that. And then
an hour later I got a phone call from the
guy that was working for is the Observer, and he goes,
we've got a problem we've got a problem. It's flipped.
And I was like what what He goes it's flipped,
and I was like, oh shit. So I got in
the was for Zidium at the time. I got on
the Zidim thunder and I left of the cargol and
(12:13):
I just immediately hit a massive line of traffic that
I was and so I thought it so I went
on the wrong side of the road and I just
drove on the wrong side of the road. So I
knew that because I was on the phone to him.
Came over the bridge. The hell and I don't know
if you've seen what happens to a caravan when it
was involved in a crash. It disintegrated.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Oh yeah, it's made out of bolts of wood.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
So there's this there's this ford falcon. It's jackknife down
a hill. So it's gone down the hill too fast
and lost. The back of the caravan started swaying and
then at jackknife flipped the caravan. The caravan has disintegrated
all over the road. Sudden, Were they in the caravan? No, No,
they were in the car They were a bit shaken, obviously,
(12:54):
but shaken. But you know, no social media back then,
so you just got I just talked to the fire
bagade there. They swept everything to the side. I checked
the winners in the back of my thunder dramed to
the airport, flew them home, just went everything'll be fine
and yeah, and then had to carry on the rest
of them because the other four teams were leaguing it
to christ so I had to catch up to them
(13:16):
and then just worry about dealing with the insurance issues
of this caravan. Brand new caravan too, a brand new
and just completely totaled within the first ten minutes of
the Was it a promo for caravans, No, it wasn't it.
Al and P sponsored it. It was the L and
P Great Great New Zealand Caravan Race.
Speaker 3 (13:33):
And I think it's a long way, like it's a
long way to drive from the cargo to Auckland. Yeah,
to get a caravan, how long did it take a week?
Speaker 1 (13:42):
They had a week to do it, so they did it.
I think they did it in four days. They got
they got to the sky tower. You had to knock
off at six o'clock every night, so we didn't have
any night driving or anything. So it was a purely
daytime activity and.
Speaker 2 (13:53):
Just get dropped off wherever you are and sleep in
the caravan.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
Yeah, we would mainly get him to the Senescen put
Off motel and stuff. But yeah, that was a complete
and utter disaster dealing with it. So ringing the caravan
company and saying, hey, you know that one of the
caravan you gave is it's disintegrated on the side of
the road just north of Thembicago.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
I just had a nightcaps there was the.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Red Yeah, that could have gone real bed. Yeah, that's
kind of That's probably the closest I've come to a
serious injury.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
It sounds like it's such a good idea. Yeah, it
sounds like such a good idea, but as you found out,
it can go really badly wrong.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Get there in first gear? Was there other one? So
we bought five cars, old cars and you it was
a race from Auckland to Wellington, but you couldn't leave
first gear. That got shut the day before the police
rang me.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
They got hold of it.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
They got hold of it. Oh shit, Yeah, they got
hold of me as well, and see like we're going
to hold you personally liable if there's any accents. I
was okay with it. The company wasn't.
Speaker 4 (14:54):
Yeah, but that it's like the remember we did the
one and that was.
Speaker 1 (14:58):
It was around We did it around Pocket.
Speaker 4 (15:00):
Yeah, Poko Raceway and we got about six second hand
cars and we drained the tanks and then we were
like go and it was who could do the most
laps of with no gas and first gear and first
gear and.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Yeah on going Yondo.
Speaker 4 (15:15):
They couldn't quite properly fully drain the tanks. They had
no idea how much gas was in there, and they
just kept going. We were sitting out at Puckaco for
a whole fucking day, but basically everyone else had crashed
out and these guys were still going.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
We had a good fire. One caught fire and caught fire. Yeah,
it was good.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
There was a whole the whole day out there, and
this Hyondo was still going at the end of the
day and.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
We're like, look, we all just give him the money.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
They give them the money.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (15:40):
There was another one where we ran a motorbike out again.
That was the one we split. It might have been
Handen Down one. We split the track into a roulette
wheel and we gave away each number to a different
listener and then ran the bike out of gas and
laps of it and wherever it broke down that they won.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
I think that was for a vape company. It was,
it was, it was for a new co a good
old days when it was put a weight money going around.
Speaker 4 (16:03):
And I got hold into the fucking health and safety
over that one because I hadn't put together any sort
of health and safety plan that like what if this
guy rocketed into the all things or something like that.
He was a professional driver, Yeah, and he was going
at about ten k's an hour. Yeah, he was running
out of gas.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
But yeah, oh good fun.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Yeah. Oh, there's there's so many others that I can
I can go through better. I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
If you want to want to go, we'll do it
on Friday.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Yeah, well it's the one. It's the one where we
flew to the Gold Coast just in ourspeedos. There was
a good time. Nothing else but intero terribly as well.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Two knockers pitch on the head. Yeah, please do it
again to
Speaker 1 (16:40):
Our please Okay, oh god, I take him back to
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