444pm Drop in Sundays Adult Autism Conversation Open to All EP36

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
Hi there.
Every Sunday a group of autisticpeople get together and drop in.
It's an informal group.
Um, but some of the things thatpeople say deserve a bigger audience,
so they give us permission for usto put them in a an edited reel.
And that's what we are here for today'sedited reel of the conversations

(00:23):
that we have about our own autism.
Cheers, enjoy.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org (00:31):
I get what

Jules-AutisticRadio.com (00:31):
you're saying.
The documents are, it's a certificateof travel insurance, so somebody can
take an actual hard copy with them,

, Harry-Autistic-Association.org: In case all the devices and things (00:42):
undefined

don't work out.
It's a backup.
It's a belt and braces, twoautistic people traveling off
to South America together.
So I think it's quite normal for theautistic sensibility to think of all
the different options and what mightgo wrong and that kind of thing.
So they want backups.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: Fort Forearm, (01:07):
undefined
which part of South America,they're going off to Peru.
Hi Nicola.
Hello.
Hi.
The right place at the right time.
We've got gr

joining us.
Um, gr We met when a recording.
Um, I'm doing a, um,an edit for a podcast.
They're somebody who's really intomusic and they also were interviewed,
so they did a bit of advocacy.

(01:47):
So, uh, we, we invited them tocome and drop in and, and join in
with everybody, and that's whatthey're trying to do at the moment.
Nicola.

Nicola-AutisticRadio.com (01:56):
Alright.

It feels a little bit like being the host at a
party, sort of trying to make sure thateverybody's comfortable and saying, oh,
this person's coming in, or that person.
Hi, Lucy's coming in.
Hi, Lucy.

Hi.
Yeah, yo.
Hi Lucy.
Hi, Nicola.

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com (02:21):
Hi.
Welcome.
Yeah, Jill.
To the village shop.
Yeah.

Jules, it like is, I quite like it, the idea
of like you being like the host of aparty, because there's times before
I've really appreciated it when you'veexplained my jokes, um, to everyone.
You'll be like, I, I feel like normallyI say my jokes and nothing happens.
And then you're like, Nicola,I told an autistic joke.
I feel like I would dobetter socially if I had.

It's like having a personal voiceover in
the background, but it also soundsa bit like mansplaining as well.
So I'm, I'm always in two mindsas to whether I'm being helpful or
whether I I'm being a pain, you know,

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: designated translator. (03:04):
undefined

Yeah.
Like I feel like it's more like thenarrator and like just, or something

are.

Always in the kitchen at parties.

Wow, this mushroom pizza's really good.

I'm just gonna jump in and read
this comment that's in the chat.
I have the kitten.
Unfortunately the camera isn'tworking on my laptop tonight.
Oh, this is exciting.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: She kitten. (03:33):
undefined
She has arrived.

I'm not gonna tempt you to squeeze the
kitten so it makes a meowing sound.

Lucy-Dawson-Autie-Unmasked (03:42):
She's actually fast asleep next to me at the moment.
Um.
Yeah, we've had a, we'vehad a lovely couple of days.
I'm covered in scratches.
Um, which means it'sall working really well.

Mama cat.
Mama cat.
There were a few bumps along the way.
Sorry.

Gary, uh, or Jr uh, did you mention that you did extensive
traveling when you were followingthe Rolling Stones around on tour?

GR-Gary-AutisticRadio.com: Yeah, I, uh, the furthest I went (04:13):
undefined
west was San Francisco, and thefurthest I went east was Berlin.
Did you get that?

No.
Did you, were youresponding to my question?
Yeah.

GR-Gary-AutisticRadio.com (04:28):
Yeah.
I said, uh, the furthest I wentwest was San Francisco, and the
furthest I went east was Berlin.

Yeah.
Because travel comes up a lot inour discussions about whether or
not pe uh, autistic people, uh, havedifficulties with travel or not.

Yeah.
It's the only, I would onlydo it for the Rolling Stones.
Um.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: I used to drink a lot, and (04:54):
undefined
that's how I coped, to be honest.

Right.
They didn't send you a limousine?
No,

no.
I, I, I flew.
, GR-Gary-AutisticRadio.com: I flew with the crew to Spain in 1999.
I was sat behind Mick Jagger on the plane.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: Oh, how does he smell? (05:14):
undefined
Well, actually, I, Iwas, I was in the, um,

depart.
I was in the airport and he walkedpast me and, um, I mean, he'd
been a hero of mine for years.
And, um, I, I say my coping mechanism wasdrinking and I was actually on my way to
the loo, so I went as quickly as I could.
And when I came back out, Iwent and walked around and
I found him in WH Smiths.

(05:42):
He was with his son.
So I went up to him and veryquietly, I said, excuse me, is this
a bad time to ask for an autograph?
So I handed him my passportand he signed and I around you.

(06:04):
I've waited 21 years for thismoment, and he said, wow.
And I said, I've seen every showon this tour except for one.
And he said, fantastic.
And then he handed hispassport back to me.
He handed my passport back to me andhe held out his hand to shake my hand
and he said, have a safe journey.
And then when I got on the plane,he, I saw him walk down the front.

(06:30):
I'd taken up his time, but afterhe signed my passport, I went to
the toilet and cried like a baby.
It was, um,

I, it, it was just a per, it was perfect.
Yeah.
Even when you

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: mentioned that he said no, they are (06:45):
undefined
almost heard that and his accent.

Yeah.
I

mean, it

was, I mean, they say don't meet your heroes and.
It was his private, he was with his son.
But, um, yeah, he was nice.
I mean, I've, I've met so many, um,through following the Stones around.
Uh, I met Brian Adams once Imet, um, Jude Law at show once.

(07:17):
Um, but, uh, I mean, I saidhello to Keith Richards once I,
Charlie.
Um, a strange conversation withhim after he'd done a gig with
his, uh, boogie Woogie band.
Uh, I said hello to Mick Taylor, who wastheir second guitarist once, so I've met

(07:38):
them all except, um, Brian Jones and Imet most of their backing people, uh,
singers and keyboard players, et cetera.

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: You met Mick Taylor. (07:47):
undefined
He.

I, well, he was walking off stage and I said, hello Mick.
And he just smiled at me.
Um, 'cause I had a, I was friends witha guy whose name's Nick Sutton, who was
in a seminal punk band called Swell Max.
Swell

and yeah.
And, um, uh, Mick Taylor playedon, on the, on his album.

Yeah, I mean, swells a whole, um, semi.
They did a song called Read AboutSeymour, which is reputed to be, um,
where Blur got their original bandname from 'cause they were Seymour.
And there's a, a gorilla's video whereyou see a guy, one of the animated

(08:38):
characters wearing a swell maps t-shirt.
So they were obviously fans.
Uh, Thurston Moore is abig fan of, uh, swell.

Lucy-Dawson-Autie-Unmasked: A story about swell maps. (08:50):
undefined
Yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah,

yeah.
I.

Swell Maps sort of led me to the Nomen who did the Autism
Man song, because they were big SwellMaps fans and they'd done some recordings
with, uh, chow Head who was a, anothermember of Swell Maps and also, um, phone
Sportsman who was a member of Swell Maps.
It's all, uh, it's all connected.
It's all, um, I say when, when,when the Rolling Stones on.

You need to remind me who that was.

Uh, I saw people that were putting that,
um, their different to fame, youknow, tiny bits that they were with
or alongside some famous people,somebody put about Jude law and.

(09:57):
He's been in various things, oftenplaying some quite nasty roles, but I
couldn't tell you which films he's in.

He's in the first Shazam movie, I think you find.

My school's famous at Irvin Welsh
attended at, which was like threeor four years above me, so I.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: I do always (10:24):
undefined

have a story.
Um, Jude Law was a, a Rolling Stonesconcert with, um, Sienna Miller.
Two sat two rows behind me and Iturned around and pointed to Jude
and, uh, Sienna give him an elbow.
And I, I said to him,um, how much I admired.
Um.

(10:49):
Seemed quite nice, but I wish I'd actuallyspoken to Sienna Miller because she'd
just done a movie about Edie Sedgwickand uh, it's all tied up in that Andy
Warhol Velvet Underground period.
And I wish I'd, I wish I'dspoken to her a bit about that.
Really,

I think you'd do well in the Embrace Autism Group
Wednesday, Gary, which is just strangelyall men, apart from one woman who.
Presenters.
But uh, yeah.
And so when the lads startgetting into the record
collections, it gets a bit wild.

Yeah.
I mean, I could, um,
that's

a thing I always say to people that, 'cause
I was into horror and sciencefiction films and TV and books.
Before I was into music, andI'm still into all those things.
And I often say to people that if,um, if I'd applied my brain to science
and not music and films, that we'd,we'd have clean, sustainable energy

(11:53):
now and we'd all be going aroundin flying cars, but I decided it
was more important knowing who the.
On the Rolling Stones.
It's only rock and rollsessions, but there you go.

It does seem to be that list making quality.
I've always wondered why asan autistic person or autistic
people in general, perhaps, um,wanna consume popular culture.
I mean, it's.

(12:33):
It's a bit of me that alwayswants to reject the normal.
And so, and

yet this obsession with popular culture,
I think it's, I mean, I have lists, um,

and uh, like I've got a list of all the horror
and science fiction films that arecoming out over the next seven years.
In.
I used to, used to, uh, I've been in afew quiz teams, um, and always done well.
And years ago I, I used to, um, Iused to call quiz machines in pubs.

(13:13):
I used to call 'em cashpointmachines because I could, I could
just go in and once I got the hangof how the machine operated, um,
I could just literally empty it.

Well, like a.

Well, you, you, I, one night I went out,
um, admittedly this was 1990s.
I went out with 20 pence pieceto the pub at seven o'clock and I
came home at half past 11, drunkwith five pounds in my pocket.
Um, I mean, one night I took 42 pound outof the mi. One night I emptied the machine

(13:52):
at 35 pounds and then they unpluggedthe machine when I got 42 outta it.
I'm going back 25 years.
So it was quite a lot of money and um,people in the pub would come up to me and
say, here's 20 P, what can you do with it?
And I'd walk off one night,this guy says, here's 20 P, you
are so good on a quiz machine.
Do something with it.

(14:12):
So I walked off and I literally cameback a minute later and he said,
well, that's 20 pence piece wasted.
And.
Every 10 seconds his moneywas, uh, was increased.
It's, um, and people, peoplesaid like, why don't you go on?
Who wants to be a millionaire?

(14:33):
But, or, or on quiz shows.
But the thing is, it, it justseems like I, I do it for fun.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: Um, and it just seems a. (14:42):
undefined

Money making.
Like that money.
I know it sounds dark.
When I, when I, when I was on the Stonestour and I ended up working for them and
I started to get really uncomfortable.
I was doing merch and I started to getreally uncomfortable because that was
my hobby and now it was something I wasmaking money out of and it was like my
relationship with the music had changed.

(15:21):
Music didn't, wasn't my sort of music

to do.
Merch from bands, um, as well gl andI've gotta say I agree with you because
it does fundamentally, especiallyif you really like the band, it does
fundamentally change the way you see it.
'cause you're looking it from the inside.
Um, and so the experience isvery different and it's work.
That's the thing.

(15:45):
Working, doing love, being at.
Um, so yeah.

Yeah, I mean the, the people I was working
for the, there was, they offeredme, um, they offered me a few things
and I just wasn't really interested.
And, um, I mean, but it got to apoint if it, if it was gonna be a
big show and there was gonna be alot of money, we used to be stood
outside selling posters for that one.

(16:13):
And, um, there was money to be made.
You wouldn't get the call.
Because they would keepthose ones to themselves.
But, um, and the last one, they,they, they offered me and then
they never rung back, was just upthe road from here at Broadlands.
It was, uh, busted and, um, McFly anduh, they said, yeah, turn up and then.

(16:40):
One of the guys who did go, said tome, well, they decided there was more,
they wanted to keep the money forthemselves, but I, I'm the man as well
that turned down Madonna because theysaid, would you do, would you do Madonna?
And I said, well, okay.
And, uh, but they wanted me to driveto London, pick up the, the posters,
then drive up to Liverpool, Dublin.

(17:05):
The, and then drive all the wayback and, um, just like a hassle.
Um, I mean, my, my travel expenseswould've been, I would've the money
I made at the gig, which might like,
so I turned Madonna down.
I'm sure she did without me.

I'm surprised you guys saying these things because.
It felt as though you werea bit more part of it.
If you were like, I dunno, evendoing the car parking or security
or litter picking or being one ofthe green police at Glastonbury.
I remember my daughter did that acouple of years running and it was

(17:44):
part of the entertainment and itfelt as though she was working there
and she had a group of buddies thatwere all kind of in the know If you.
The scenes behind the scenesbackstage and all that.
Um, so yeah, what you aresaying surprises me a bit.

Well, there's a local project here to set up a cinema in
the local village hall, uh, once a month.
And I went on to that.
They got me in 'cause I'd workedin marketing and, and they had me
doing marketing, which is just rightin press releases and making sure.

(18:25):
When we did the first one, it, it wasclear that the audience was, um, over 60.
So it was Gray Market, gray pound,and they never showed a film
that I actually wanted to see.
Well, there were two films that theyshowed, which were films I would
actually want to see, but other thanthat, never showed a film that I.

(18:53):
Setting up the room andscreens and all that.
It, it didn't bother me because thefilms didn't matter and, and sometimes
I would go down in the evenings andmake sure the hall was all okay.
And as soon as the film started, I wasoff over to the local, um, multiplex to
see whatever that week's release was.
I, um, horror has got a bit more ofa. Um, a bit more respectable now,

(19:19):
but, um, I mean, horror films werealways considered, uh, sort of next to
pornography really, and science fiction.
And until, um,
until just after Star Wars sciencefiction was considered to be for
children, it wasn't considered.

I worked, um, one of the gigs that I worked
once was a blur gig, um, in my land.
Um, and the fact of thematter is it's just work.
And, um, so yeah, you're kind of in,but they're long days and tiring days
and, you know, I didn't get paid.

(20:08):
So, I mean, and I, and I also didone time a, a 30 day tour, UK tour,
um, with one day off, um, withinthat, and I was just knackered by it.
It was, you know, it would be, itwould be lovely if you felt like
there was some sort of, but by theend of it, you, you just cannot
stand the site of everybody else.
You want to go home and go to bed.

(20:29):
So yeah, you're kind of in, butat the same time, it you realize
that a job is, a job, is a job.

I think even the bands hate that treadmill.

Yeah.
I mean, a lot of people forget that.
Uh, I mean, I, I follow a lot of, um,I never used to follow a lot of artists
that were sort of off the radar, sort of,um, smaller indie bands who are playing
small venues, but a lot of people, Ido more now, but a lot of people don't.

(21:00):
Rolling stone.
There's four people jumping in the backof a van driving miles and basically
not earning any money outta it.
It's, um, it's not all, uh, glitz andglam and the crews, I think stones
treat their crews relatively well.

(21:20):
But, um, most of the crews,I, I think it's just, I.
You know, you turn up, you set thestaging up, you might get a couple
of hours off the band had finished.
Then you take down the staging andthen you pack it away, and then a few
hours later you're in the next town.
Next you've setting it all up again.

(21:41):
It's hard work

and I found I was working from sort
of two o'clock in the afternoonto two o'clock in the morning.
And then getting onto a sleeper coachand then waking up at maybe about
10 o'clock and then, you know, goingaround again and doing it again.
And in all this, you've alsogotta remember I'm doing sort
of t-shirt counting and, andmaking sure nothing gets nicked.

(22:04):
And, um, you know, and really beingin charge of that store my, by
myself, then doing all the where.
Just tiring.
And I like gr, I used to use alcohola lot for, for nerves and for the
socialization things, so I cankind of relate to that bit too.

Yeah.
Also, if you are one t-shirt short andthey couldn't work out where it was, I bet
they docked that out of your pay because,um, when I did the posters for, um, usher.
There was counting posters up againand again and again because there were
two or three they couldn't account for.
And, um, one time, uh, on astones, uh, these lithographs we

(22:52):
were selling at the stones gigs.
These were arc quality lithographs.
They were like 70 or $80 each.
And there was there one short on stock.
Out our wages to cover the $80.
Turned out one of the guys hadactually given someone one the,

(23:17):
but yeah.

Able to be a bit creative anyway with my accounting,
because I did it all on paper at the end.
So, you know, I, I, I, I, I tend, Imaybe shouldn't be admitting this out
loud, but maybe I, I might have fluffeda few of the figures to make it look
a bit better than it actually was.
But I mean, you know, really difficultwhen there's only one of you on a
big stool and something just getslifted because, you know, that's a.

(23:45):
You go away feeling terrible that youhadn't done your job properly, but
honestly they're expecting you to doan awful lot on, on very little sleep.

Yeah, I mean, the guys, when I did, um,
uh, usher, which is the, the Stonesthing was a whole different setup.
But when I did the Russia and we had two.
So you'd put the two posters onthe ground and then every time
someone bought one, you'd pick itup, roll it up and hand it to them.

(24:16):
And I said to the guys, I said,we're sat around doing nothing.
Why don't we roll the posters up now Andthen when people buy it, you can just
put two single posters on the ground.
Then when you buy them, you justcut the time on the transaction.
It makes everything easier for everyone.
And um, they sent someone off to buybags of rubber bands and we did that.

(24:37):
And, um, they just seemed like asimple thing they hadn't thought of.

You do get a latitude sort of to, to maybe make
a few differences to the way you dothings and you, you kind of organize it
to your own sort of comfort in the end.
And I really didn't haveanybody else helping me.
The only person I had was likethe manager come over and sort
of, uh, hang around a bit.
But, you know, I didn't, I would just doit to my, so I would find little shortcuts

(25:02):
to make it easier for myself, especiallyif I was doing a big venue like I. We
would play the, um, Astoria in London, inCentral London, which had a huge capacity.
And I was the onlyperson, man in the merch.
So I had to get it just so,

yeah, I wouldn't really want to do it now.
Um, I, um, 'cause I, I had a, 11 years ago

I went to quite a traumatic part of my life.
Learning social things andinteracting with people.
I just went back to factory settingsand a couple years after that, that
was diagnosed as, as, as autism.

(25:49):
I wouldn't, um, I, um,
I went to see the Stonesand Hyde Park in 2022.
And, uh, I, I, when I put them onFacebook, I said I had a face that looked
like I'd been slapped with a wet fish.
I really did look unhappy andmiserable, um, packed in there.

(26:12):
They, they're, they're one of thefew bands that I would do that for.

I, um, I went through a, a period
of time where I, I, I was quitemute in social situations, so, um.
Or late discovered, I guess, uh,when I was 43 and I'm 51 now.

(26:38):
So I've only had a very limited amountof time where I've known about this.
But, you know, I, looking back, I can seethe patterns and the things that I used
to do that, that, uh, are signs of autism.
Um, so yeah, it's, it's, I, I, I too wouldgo back to factory sentencing times and
just not be able to do the, the going out.
I'm a bit bit like that now, to be honest.

(27:01):
I don't like to socialize at all.
Now, I prefer my own companyin keeping my own counsel.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: Yeah, I was 53. (27:08):
undefined
Um, and, uh, I, um, I give all credit

to my mother who was always there and
supported me and helped me and, andthe traumatic in my life was when.
I lived with her all my life and oncethat was gone, that was my safety net.
No matter what happened,I knew I could cut.

(27:37):
My home was here and she washere, and that support was there.
Um, with my father who died 33years ago, uh, with my father, I
would say he was nonverbal autistic.
My father was, I think yearswent past when, when my

(27:59):
father and I never even spoke.
And there was not because of any, ananimosity, he just didn't speak to anyone.
And when we'd go to family gatheringsor, or when we'd visit the relatives,
'cause my, my parents both came from largefamilies and he would sit in the car, he
wouldn't even wanna come in and he car.

(28:22):
Um, my, both my parents were farm peopleand, uh, in the back garden here, when,
when my father was physically active,I mean, it was just all vegetables.
It was just incredible.
He, he could just grow anything.
That was his thing.

Okay.
I just wanna make a timely reminderfor people taking part in the four,
speaking loud.
You can either have your whole of yourtrack, whatever you say, removed so that
it doesn't appear when we put it out asa podcast, or you can have it included.

(29:05):
So if you say personal things, now youhave to make a decision at the end of
this, whether you want to put thesethings out or not, and that might
change how far you go into things.

I've, um, I've got no problem with that.

Seems like you've been understand.
Um, uh, and my parents quite another.
Sort of line to somebody who can kindof look after and shelter you a bit.
So it makes you feel a littlebit more like you're a little

(29:45):
bit more exposed, I guess.
I mean, I don't wanna hit onanything that's difficult to use,
so I'm, I'm not gonna say anymore.

Yeah, I mean, there's the, um, there's the, uh, the
film, uh, a late Discovery, which, um.
There's film I did with somestudents called a Lake Discovery.
It's all in there and it is, um,yeah, it's, it's an open wound.
When I also had, um, thecouncil told me when my mother

(30:17):
died, I'd been made homeless.
Um, I'd lived in the house forjust on 51 years at the time.
And that was, uh, that was years and.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: It's, I'm here. (30:35):
undefined
Um,

and there were times when I didn't think I'd make it.
I'm.
There's, there's the old gag.
Uh, I'm just trying tothink where, I think it was
Hitchhiker's guy to the galaxy.
Yeah.
It was deep thought, wasn't it?
Um, he said there was some computer,he could talk the hind legs off of a

(31:02):
donkey, but I could persuade it to walkafterwards and, um, that's really funny.
I could, I could do it as anOlympic sport, especially about,

I just want to bring in something from the text.
Raymond says, your experiencewas like being uprooted.
I think that's a veryinteresting metaphor for that.
Or similarly, he used the word like,

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: yeah, I mean, I would, (31:26):
undefined

my mother was probably, she probably had a DHD.
She, she was obsessed with housework.
She kept the house uptogether all the time.
And, um, when she came out hospitals.

(31:51):
Make sure I knew what I needed todo in the house so that I'd be okay.
And also my mother met quitea few celebrities and um,
but she never said anything.
But every once in a while a storywould pop up and, um, I'll be honest
with you, if they were puff fullof their self-importance, um, she

(32:11):
would put them in their places.
Um, yeah.
Very funny stories when she, butshe would never say anything.
One day she, we'd be watching TV andshe'd say, oh, not that Sean Connery.
And then the story would pop out.
She met Sean Connery, didn't go well.
She met Mick H. That didn'tgo well, but there you go.

All thes

and Graces.
Okay.
I'm just.
Mute being mute, and sometimes wetake a few minutes so that anybody
who is out there who hasn't beenin the conversation gets the
opportunity to join in their own time.

(33:00):
Well, good evening everybody

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: and discussion tonight (33:02):
undefined
this way, asking, is the music

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: allowed in the background? (33:09):
undefined
Sorry, what are you asking?
If you've got music in your background?
I can't hear anything.
Harry.

Yes.
Uh, it's because, uh, deeperdownstairs about music.
I'm just wondering if it'sgonna interfere with the sound.
It's not that bad.
It's just because I know the,the microphone sensitive.

Hey, may I had a nice screen van chime in
once when I was speaking to you?

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: Well, there has been a couple of (33:35):
undefined
times where we've had conversations.
I've been hearing kinda, you know,background noises and because this
sounds so good, I keep thinking it'smy own area just to realize when
the person stops speaking and theymute it's let to somewhere else.
And I can remember one timeHank Jules, uh, went and walked

(33:55):
away, uh, to get a cup of tea orsomething and didn't go and mute.
Which was unusual.
And uh, when they came back,I heard this hum hum thum.
I thought somebody wascoming into my living room.
Me,
I don't yell like that.
Well, I mean, I thought somebody wasactually walking in my house because
the sound is, that's been good.
So

yeah, I've been in Zoom meetings where people,
you can hear people having fightswith themselves in their kitchens.

Well, I.
People weren't used to it.
And it was like a couple were atthis meeting, you know, it was
like a kinda housing meeting.
And I think what happened is they weretalking about someone at the meeting,
like they said something or made a mistakeor whatever, but they left the mute off

(34:49):
and they heard them and it caused a.
And you get people that usedto come in with their tailies
on and thought that's normal.
The tele on in the background.
But because it's that sensitive,I mean, I dunno about others.
Um, remove clock in my room becausetick and I've got air freshener

(35:14):
things that kinda automatic off every.
Or, well, I'm speaking on herebecause I know it's quite sensitive.
I dunno if other people hear it, but Ihear it so it seems everybody else can.

I used to visit a relative every Sunday
and I would only go if they agreedto switch off the freshener.
'cause when it used to jetout while I was sitting there.
I knew I was gonna get a bad reactionin my nose and throat to this stuff.

(35:53):
So that, that's when it began to beapparent that there was something going
on with me, you know, because I wasmoaning about smells in people's houses.

Yeah.
I get you.
I mean, I've only had this sort ofthink now recently, um, but I can
remember like being in someone else'shouse, not realizing they've got it
and then this kind of noise happens.
You're going, what is that noise?
It's even, sometimes it's just evennoises like phones going off, or
bleeping or just something like that.

(36:25):
It's like it kind throws you,but if you're not used to it.
But then with air, fresherobviously gives off a smile.
And if you're not used to that, andthey're supposed to be powerful.
So the sensitivities, well.

I lived in a little village, really little
village, not so very long ago.
And the worst part about livingthere, and I did actually move, was
I lived next to, um, a church whichhad a clock tower, and it would chime
every hour, morning, noon night,midnight, one o'clock in the morning.

(37:00):
So.
Oh, one of the reasons.

Yeah.
Jules, should you have that, yourdata, because I can recall some
of that happening and some kindof broadcast that in the past

he may be away, you know, helping out
with the Trump and fire brigade.

Yeah.
But, uh, it reminds a time where Istayed in a hotel and it was right
next to Cathedral and it wasn't like Ithere for a weekend, so Sunday morning.
Had a nice week kinda dingdong to seeyou, that the, the mask was starting

(37:43):
and my bed, my, the tail room is rightnext to that side, so Yeah, I, I get it.
But obviously if it's something thathappens in regular business somewhere
where you live, that would be, you know.
Happened.
I thought, I dunno why I thought, butI thought when got till at certain

(38:07):
times at night, and obviously duringthe night that it wouldn't do that
until a certain time in the morning.
I, I thought

there'd be like an embargo having, having be

six,

I suppose, chiming in the, but it, it was, and it
it, there's like this two from thing.
It's like number one.
It keeps you awake.
And number two, it reminds youthe hours going past in your life.
And I know that sounds weird, but itwas really, it's like, it's like, it's
just like counting down every hour.

(38:39):
I have to, because I couldhear it from work as well.
So, uh, I, I, I found thatit, it just really got to me.
Well,

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: that's the thing. (38:47):
undefined
Yeah.
Because it's.
It's the measurement of time.
So if you hear that, you knowthat an hour's passed or if for 15
minutes or whatever it, it does.
So I, I totally get that becauseeven though they say people are
artistic, obsessed with time, it's morescheduling than time I would think.
And you don't want to remembered ofevery measurement of the time you want

(39:10):
to kinda get lost in just living andthen check the time when you need, so.

I remember trying to read the Sundial at one of
our local parks, walking the dogs.
It took me a while to figure it out.
You know, it's like not instinctiveanymore to follow the sun,

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: especially when it's dull. (39:32):
undefined

Lucy-Dawson-Autie-Unmasked: Boring about my cat. (39:36):
undefined
She's called Jessie and she has been,this has absolutely been the light
of my life for the last three days.
It's been just her and her andher, and she's really, I, I've been
feeling really terrible over Daisygoing and I, and you know, and that's
the thing, Daisy not being in mylife has been really bad for me.

(39:59):
So having a new animal has actually made.
Um, having this soul in thehouse that's relying on me.
Um, and she's right next to me right now.
Um, so yeah, Jessie, this is her now.
Um, so she's gonna, andI think you, thanks.
I do feel mellow.
I see you putting thetext that I say mellow.

(40:21):
I feel it because, um, it's allstarting to come back to me now.
I'm starting to have somewhere emotions.

You're making me think of my old friend Irene,
who my dog is inherited from her.
She began to accumulate animals.
You know, it was amenagerie after a while.
Um, there were rats, there were gers,there were, you know, various rodents.
There was five dogs at one point.

(40:53):
You know, she never had.
I'm not saying it becomes anaddiction or anything, but some
people are very tied into animals.
Um, and, uh, al thing,

Lucy-Dawson-Autie-Unmasked: that's the thing for me. (41:08):
undefined
It can, from just being an emotionalthing, having it's a thing.
I just feel that's a wonderful thingand I feel like I'm responsible
as well, which really helps.
Um, she's filled a little hole.
One at a time with apart my

(41:33):
energy, but
dad had fish and mybrother broke the tank.
When they were on holiday, mymom and dad were on holiday
and my dad was tank come too as

well,

um, on the upstairs landing, and
my brother had decided he wasgonna go into, which happened.
Um, this is many moons ago, uh, decade.
And he, he went up and he pushed up the,the, the loft lid and it fell and it
hit the, the fish tank, which broke, andthen the whole of the top floors flooded.

(42:10):
All the fish died.
It was my dad's pride and joy.
Um, and he phoned me up ina panic where I was living.
I had to go and clean it all up for him.
Um, so yeah, we went offtropical fish after that.

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: Remembering events like that (42:25):
undefined
in the past that have happened.
Sometimes they, um, not voluntarily.
They just sort of appearin your head sometimes.
And that one's big because my dadwas gonna walk through the door.
Old wound, probably kind opened upagain for some weird reasons what

Lucy-Dawson-Autie-Unmasked: my dad was like. (42:41):
undefined
Um, yeah.
Yeah, the big sort of controllingautistic father that he was, um,
thinking about him walking throughthe door and seeing, uh, a lot of.
Yeah, that was the, the dread, of course.
Yes.
Thank you Raymond.
The dread, uh, you said on the se,but yeah, it was that, that thing

(43:06):
about once your father comes home,I was fully an adult, but he still
had that whole controlling thing.

Harry-Autistic-Association.org: I see that time's up. (43:14):
undefined
Just know, speaking of time.
How are we doing guys?
Is that us for today?
Well, it's 5.
44 now, so our drop in hour is finished,and thank you to all the people who

(43:37):
have texted, and also to the peoplewho have put their voices to this,
that are going to allow us to put someof those words out into the podcast.
If you join us here at the 444, your voiceisn't recorded, your text isn't recorded,
but the people here have given permission,so that it's an example for others.

(43:57):
See you again.
Always.
Reliably.
Sunday.
444pm.
Cheers guys.

All Episodes

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Crime Junkie

Ridiculous History

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}444pm Drop in Sundays Adult Autism Conversation Open to All EP36

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

.css-r6mb8g{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:1;overflow:hidden;}On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Crime Junkie

Ridiculous History

All Episodes

444pm Drop in Sundays Adult Autism Conversation Open to All EP36

On Purpose with Jay Shetty