February 2, 2024 • 20 mins
Snag my free meditation for attracting clients to your creative business!
Welcome to an enriching episode of 'Deep Healing for Creative Entrepreneurs' with your host, Aubrey Bahr. As a subconscious release technique practitioner and seasoned entrepreneur, Aubrey embarks on a transformative journey, sharing her valuable insights on the vital role of authenticity and personal growth in your professional endeavors.
In this captivating discussion, Aubrey unfolds her decade-long journey of emotional evolution: from being a defensive, hypersensitive individual, to achieving a harmonious balance in emotional intelligence. Gain unique perspectives from her experiences with various coaches and learn why authenticity is the key to attracting potential leads.
Aubrey discusses the critical balance between sharing personal details as part of business branding and respecting privacy. Revealing her personal life has enabled her to establish profound connections with like-minded individuals and has greatly shaped her personal and business identity.
Despite the apprehension surrounding her open approach, Aubrey illuminates how inviting authenticity into her life led to attracting the right energies, reinforcing her purpose, and boosting her self-confidence. Join the discussion as she uncovers constructive strategies for dealing with past traumas and the importance of acknowledging one's worth.
This episode delves deep into the journey from overreactive attitudes towards encompassing emotional intelligence. It's about understanding emotional responses as a reflection of other people's life stage rather than personal critique, learning not to internalize them, but to process and release. We're reminded that despite the hardships, each person is in control of their emotional state and can choose the path of self-improvement.
Join us as we guide you on this enlightening journey towards emotional intelligence and beyond. Learn to ground your confidence in self-belief and deeds that help others, while being patient with those still grappling with their own struggles. This podcast is not only about understanding and accepting yourself but also about realizing that growth and emotional intelligence are within your grasp.
So, ready to embrace emotional intelligence? Hop on this transformative healing journey for creative entrepreneurs!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hello, hello, beautiful souls. Aubrey here.
What do you know? I'm on my own podcast here to talk to you today.
I am super excited because I had a really interesting experience recently,
and it really brought to light how powerful this work is,
(00:20):
but also how it's not for everybody.
Everybody and I want you guys to know that
I'm so happy to go over this with you
because honestly I want to attract people into my world that are ready and open
to receiving something better I am not here to attract people into my world
(00:41):
that want to tell me that this stuff is not important and that it doesn't affect
their lives or your lives or anybody's lives so with With that,
I'm going to go ahead and roll the opening credits and we're going to jump right into this topic today.
Hey friend, welcome to Deep Healing for Creative Entrepreneurs.
My name is Aubrey Barr and I am a subconscious release technique practitioner
(01:04):
and photography business owner.
I know you are sick of ending your day feeling overwhelmed and exhausted and
you are seeking a solution to help you feel creatively inspired and actively
engaged in your business as well well as personal life.
In this podcast, we are going to dig into any limiting beliefs or subconscious
(01:25):
programs that are keeping you in a space filled with anxiety and stress.
This work is not a temporary solution for your life. No, this is a complete transformation.
So grab your coffee or tea and let's start you on the road to healing.
And let me just say, hey, you can do this. You are worth it.
(01:47):
And you are meant to thrive in life and business. So let's dig in.
So over the last few years, I'd say two and a half years since I decided to
go a little bit more into coaching.
I have had the opportunity to work with three coaches and they were all different
(02:10):
and they all were unique in their own ways and helpful at that phase of my life.
But it's interesting to me that all three of them had the same idea about how
we draw people into our worlds. And I do feel like it's pertinent for you guys today.
So I'm going to share it with you. And that is that.
When we put ourselves out there, when we talk about ourselves,
when we share about our work, you know, there's a whole other side to it that
(02:34):
has to do with branding where we're literally sharing ourselves with everybody.
So it might be something a little more personal. It might be more of like examples
and things that, you know, that go a little deeper or show a different side of you.
And that's totally okay. In fact, it's something that a lot of coaches will
(02:55):
tell you to do. Now, they're not telling you to share everything, right?
They're not telling you to, you know, not respect people's privacy in your world.
But just being able to share with people the real you is so beneficial and it's
so authentic and it's just something that we don't get to see a lot of these
days. So I enjoy being authentic, and it's something that fills my soul.
(03:17):
At the end of the day, I feel confident in what I do and who I serve,
and my purpose here on earth in general feels very, very stable.
And I am just so confident in that, that when things come up or people don't
like me, I just tend to shrug it off.
And man, I used to not be that way. I seriously used to not be that way at all.
(03:41):
In fact, when I break down how I used to deal with confrontation or putting
myself out there, I absolutely spent the first 22 years of my life,
like, just underreacting to everything.
Now inside, I felt it hot and heavy.
But on the outside, people didn't know what I was thinking. Okay, they didn't know.
(04:01):
I mean, maybe I would cry. I wouldn't tell them why I was crying.
Like I was very much an internal person and I still am, to be honest with you, it is part of who I am.
So that part I do take with me, but I've just learned how to process it differently.
So I did that for 22 years. And then after that, I got a divorce from somebody
(04:22):
who was mentally and physically abusive.
And I learned from that experience that, no, Aubrey, you cannot keep it inside.
Actually, you need to actually show those emotions and put yourself out there
and you need to stand up for yourself because guess what? Nobody else is standing up for you.
And that is true. It was absolutely true.
(04:42):
But what happened after that is I went directly into a defensive,
I would say more masculine mode.
There's nothing wrong with masculine.
Touch on that kind of energy several times in the past episodes,
but basically leading with masculine energy is very defensive and it's not natural
for a lot of us women to be stuck in that mode, but it is something that comes
(05:04):
up as a defense mechanism.
And so for me in this situation, it was absolutely a defense mechanism for me
where I was going to, you know, call you out.
If you said something to me that was disrespectful, if you said something to
me that made me feel less then?
I don't care who you are. I did not care who you are. I was going to call you out.
(05:26):
When things happened to me in my life during this next phase,
where I was in this masculine and defense mechanism and super wounded,
okay, that's what I want you to get here. I was in a super wounded phase.
So when things would go wrong with me in life, and I really didn't have anyone
to blame, well, I would blame God, right?
And I would blame, I would still find someone to blame, even if it was my fault,
(05:46):
or even if it was just one of those things that were We're pretty crappy all around.
So there was always this victim mentality during this phase.
There was always this extra anxiety and anger.
You know, my husband and I even, I mean, we've been married for 18 years,
but when I was in this particular phase, I remember it was like I would lash out.
I mean, I didn't really yell at him per se, but I mean, you do something wrong, I'm going to tell you.
(06:11):
So, you know, if I expect something different, then I'm going to tell you, right?
So there was no kind of compromise or companionship in that,
is there, when one person in the relationship is overbearing and can't let something slide,
literally just cannot, has to be nitpicky about certain things.
It's just not really good all around for that relationship.
(06:33):
So I was being that person, but he still loved me.
But I mean, it's just like this phase. And I can easily look back at that and
say, wow, I had no idea at the time, no idea that,
I was allowing myself to spiral out of control over things that were just plain ridiculous.
(06:55):
The same way I can sit down and have a conversation with someone now and be
like, wow, that person is obviously upset about something that has nothing to do with me.
I was in that and you don't really notice.
You really don't because you're in this mode of honestly trying to survive.
You're trying to survive through all of this different trauma that you never knew how to process.
(07:17):
And I mean, you feel like what you're doing is absolutely correct 100%, right?
So it's very interesting and kind of difficult to think back to that Aubrey.
And I'm summarizing it as between the ages of, let's say, 23 and about 33. Right?
There was definitely better times and worse times, okay? Because at the beginning
(07:39):
of that, that's when I went through even depression and stuff.
So really, really close to that Saturn return, if you know anything about it.
Those years are not usually easy.
But yeah, so I look back at that person and I'm like, she honestly,
you guys, she had no clue. She absolutely had no clue.
And I had overcame this huge, huge traumatic situation in my first marriage
(08:04):
where my family thought I was going to die in that marriage.
And just leaving everything to come out the other side and then be super defensive
and super in attack mode and just feeling like I always need to make people understand me, right?
And I had to make them. So I went from one extreme, which was underreacting to overreacting.
(08:26):
And then I landed where I'm at now, which is is the Aubrey in the middle that
realizes that life is not perfect, nor will it ever be.
But the best thing I could do for myself is to be able to stay in that mode
of not under and not overreacting, making decisions like based off of more emotional intelligence.
(08:48):
This took me a long time to get to.
Now, the reason why this is tying all in today is because I had talked earlier
about how I have, You know, these coaches in the past that have told me,
you know, you have to do this one thing.
And what they always say is that you need to be authentic and you need to stand for something.
(09:08):
You know, I spent a lot of my life only having people that loved me or ignored me, right?
There was not really any hate towards me, let's say.
So it's weird for me to think that somebody has a dislike towards me.
But at the same time, this is what my coaches wanted me to do.
(09:29):
They wanted me to get to a spot to where I was so open and honest and authentic
that somebody, somebody out there, you guys is going to hate me.
And here I am. I've arrived.
I've arrived on the other side of that. And it's so bizarre because on one end,
I want to revert back to that first Aubrey, right? right, who was underreacting
(09:52):
that wants to go cry in a corner for like 12 days.
And then there was the second Aubrey who was overreacting, who would unleash
everything, you know, and I don't want to say share it all over the internet
because I don't think I ever really did anything like that.
But just like, call up people I know and be like, can you believe this happened?
I just got to tell you what happened. Can you believe this person did this?
(10:14):
And I'm not there either. That doesn't feel aligned. It doesn't even feel aligned
for me me to really even tell the story of how this came out. So I'm not going to.
But what I will say is that on the other side, I'm feeling pretty,
pretty confident with where I'm at.
And I want you guys to be there too. I want every person that I know in my life
(10:35):
to get to this point where there's enough emotional intelligence where we can
say, well, that sucks, right?
It's not like a great feeling to be hated or to be disliked or be put down or
be talked about. That's not a great feeling ever, right?
But understanding that it really has nothing to do with me, right?
It really has to do with which stage in that person's life are they at.
(10:59):
It's possible maybe that they're in that defensive mode over things, right?
And this is why it's so crucial for me in my world to be able to attract people
to me that are absolutely ready for this work.
That's you if you're listening. If you listen this far, that's you,
okay? I'm just saying. But there's a lot of people out there that...
(11:23):
Are so in the victim phase or are so in defensive mode that they cannot possibly,
possibly look in on themselves and say, okay, I'm going to let this go. This is holding me back.
This is making me miserable, whatever.
They cannot do that. It's not in their realm of possibilities with where their mindset is.
(11:45):
And even as I'm speaking about this, I'm getting a a little nudge to talk a
little bit about people around us, maybe our family members,
maybe you have a spouse or a child even, an older teenager, whatever,
people in your lives that are in one of these phases where you can tell they
(12:06):
either underreact or they overreact.
And when we think about those people, we think, well, there's no hope for them,
or I'm going to have to remove any any ties with them. I'm going to have to walk away.
You know, we have, some of us are in situations where we even quit a job over
a boss that's maybe in one of these, you know, most likely the defensive mode one, Aubrey number two.
(12:28):
But we have to walk away from something sometimes because the way that people
are acting about situations is just not in line with the way that they should be.
And so, and I hate using the word should, but you know, a healthier emotional
emotional space would be to be able to process emotions correctly, right?
(12:48):
So just know that if you have those people in your lives and you're thinking,
oh my gosh, there's just no hope for them. They're never going to understand this.
Maybe if it's your husband, maybe he's never going to let me spend an extra
$2,000 on getting emotional and mental health therapy for this kind situation or whatever.
(13:08):
Just know that leading with example and being that person that's like, you know what?
I'm not going to let this get me down. I'm going to think about it and I'm going
to process it and just let it go, bless and release.
Being that person is so much more rewarding in life and it is truly the ultimate leader, right?
(13:33):
This person who can process things, who can inspire people around them,
who can make sure that they stay in this healthy emotional state where they're
not holding onto things, but they're also not willy-nilly throwing them about
at other people like crazy.
That is a beautiful place to be in. And honestly, we need so many more leaders, you guys,
(13:55):
but not in the sense of just having them, but actually leading with their their
energy, with their choices, with their awareness, with their spirituality,
all of that. We absolutely need that.
If you've ever had a conversation with a friend and they're like,
oh my gosh, you're so inspiring, or you're a really good leader,
(14:16):
you would be really good at this, right? And it's like a leadership job.
That's a hint, you guys. That's a hint. We need more of you.
If you are going through life and you're absolutely feeling like you're in this
hamster wheel and the same things
are going on and you feel called to take the upper hand in anything.
(14:38):
That, my friend, is your intuition telling you that it is time to level up.
And if that's you and you are feeling that call, I absolutely encourage you
to look at your emotional health.
Look at the state of your mind. Where are you at in this crazy little list I just made?
(15:01):
Where are you at? You might be in between two. you might be
closer to my end of things how i am now what
does that feel like if you know that you've been super
defensive and it's always felt right to you but it's starting to
feel uncomfortable and not aligned that's because
you're ready for a shift you are ready to
level up okay so so if you are feeling the call to change your life in any way
(15:29):
whatsoever if this talk about deep healing is something that sounds intriguing
to you and sounds like maybe there might be a place there for you,
then I'm telling you that there is a place there for you. There absolutely is.
And just being able to come to terms with the fact that you're ready for a shift is such a big deal.
(15:51):
And it's not something to take lightly. It's not something to overlook.
It's not something to say, oh, you know, in a couple of years,
I'll worry about it then.
And imagine how different your life would be if you shifted out of the underacting
or the overreacting situation and you shifted more into a, okay,
(16:12):
stuff happens. Here I am.
Let me see if I need to worry about anything here. Nope, I don't. Okay, I'm okay.
I'm going to be fine because I have my own confidence.
My confidence is not based on whether or not other people like me.
My confidence is first and foremost in my God and being able to establish myself
(16:37):
as someone who is precious and someone who is very,
very much unconditionally loved and someone that is doing work to help others on this earth.
That is my foundation. And that can be yours too, in whichever way you need
to look at it. but when your foundation is in something bigger than yourself,
(17:01):
you notice that your journey is also going to be bigger.
And you notice that you don't need to answer to people who are not there,
especially people who are living like Aubrey 1 or Aubrey 2. It's not necessary.
They are in their own journey and they have their own hiccups to deal with and
they choose every day to stay there.
(17:24):
And maybe it's not a conscious choice, right? Maybe it's a subconscious thing,
which is totally also possible.
But with the amount of information we have out there now on neuroscience and
how the brain works and how our traumas are held in our bodies,
yeah, we absolutely are choosing to stay in a state of disappointment if we're
(17:48):
not willing to look outside of that.
So I love having people in my world like you guys who are open to different
things to be able to shift them in the ways that that they need.
It's very unique by person.
That is what lights my soul up because I get to take people by the hand and
walk them over to the other side of that.
(18:08):
And it's the most insane thing I've ever seen. It is seriously a delight in
so many ways to be able to watch that growth happen. And I know it's not super tangible.
I know people won't just show up and be like, yeah, look, I lost 20 pounds, right?
Because that is different than the work that I do. What I do is, how do you feel now?
(18:30):
How has your whole life, and most people will even say their personality, has changed?
So I'm sending all my gratitude and love out to this amazing group of podcast listeners.
There's a lot of you guys, and I'm just filled with joy that you choose to download
(18:51):
these episodes and you choose to listen in to what I have to say about this,
because it's important.
And it is a baby step towards being able to shift your own life.
Maybe you're not ready for the deep work. Maybe you're not feeling a call to
continue on with either one of my programs or my private courses or whatever.
And that's totally fine. Maybe just getting the idea that life could be different
(19:15):
through doing shadow work.
Maybe that's the kind of thing that you're learning now.
I hope so. All right, my friends, have a beautiful day and a wonderful weekend,
and I will see you guys next week.
I hope this podcast spoke to you in some way.
If it did, please go ahead and leave me a review and subscribe so that I know
(19:39):
you're enjoying what you hear.
And further, if you know somebody else who owns their own creative business
and struggles with anything that we spoke about,
please pass this on because it is my hope that we will be able to build a community
of like-minded individuals who love on each other and appreciate the many facets
that make our creative business so unique.
(20:01):
And lastly, check out the show notes to find my free Facebook community and
other useful links to work with me. All right, friend, see you soon.
Music.
Hello, hello, beautiful souls. Aubrey here.
What do you know? I'm on my own podcast here to talk to you today.
I am super excited because I had a really interesting experience recently,
and it really brought to light how powerful this work is,
(00:20):
but also how it's not for everybody.
Everybody and I want you guys to know that
I'm so happy to go over this with you
because honestly I want to attract people into my world that are ready and open
to receiving something better I am not here to attract people into my world
(00:41):
that want to tell me that this stuff is not important and that it doesn't affect
their lives or your lives or anybody's lives so with With that,
I'm going to go ahead and roll the opening credits and we're going to jump right into this topic today.
Hey friend, welcome to Deep Healing for Creative Entrepreneurs.
My name is Aubrey Barr and I am a subconscious release technique practitioner
(01:04):
and photography business owner.
I know you are sick of ending your day feeling overwhelmed and exhausted and
you are seeking a solution to help you feel creatively inspired and actively
engaged in your business as well well as personal life.
In this podcast, we are going to dig into any limiting beliefs or subconscious
(01:25):
programs that are keeping you in a space filled with anxiety and stress.
This work is not a temporary solution for your life. No, this is a complete transformation.
So grab your coffee or tea and let's start you on the road to healing.
And let me just say, hey, you can do this. You are worth it.
(01:47):
And you are meant to thrive in life and business. So let's dig in.
So over the last few years, I'd say two and a half years since I decided to
go a little bit more into coaching.
I have had the opportunity to work with three coaches and they were all different
(02:10):
and they all were unique in their own ways and helpful at that phase of my life.
But it's interesting to me that all three of them had the same idea about how
we draw people into our worlds. And I do feel like it's pertinent for you guys today.
So I'm going to share it with you. And that is that.
When we put ourselves out there, when we talk about ourselves,
when we share about our work, you know, there's a whole other side to it that
(02:34):
has to do with branding where we're literally sharing ourselves with everybody.
So it might be something a little more personal. It might be more of like examples
and things that, you know, that go a little deeper or show a different side of you.
And that's totally okay. In fact, it's something that a lot of coaches will
(02:55):
tell you to do. Now, they're not telling you to share everything, right?
They're not telling you to, you know, not respect people's privacy in your world.
But just being able to share with people the real you is so beneficial and it's
so authentic and it's just something that we don't get to see a lot of these
days. So I enjoy being authentic, and it's something that fills my soul.
(03:17):
At the end of the day, I feel confident in what I do and who I serve,
and my purpose here on earth in general feels very, very stable.
And I am just so confident in that, that when things come up or people don't
like me, I just tend to shrug it off.
And man, I used to not be that way. I seriously used to not be that way at all.
(03:41):
In fact, when I break down how I used to deal with confrontation or putting
myself out there, I absolutely spent the first 22 years of my life,
like, just underreacting to everything.
Now inside, I felt it hot and heavy.
But on the outside, people didn't know what I was thinking. Okay, they didn't know.
(04:01):
I mean, maybe I would cry. I wouldn't tell them why I was crying.
Like I was very much an internal person and I still am, to be honest with you, it is part of who I am.
So that part I do take with me, but I've just learned how to process it differently.
So I did that for 22 years. And then after that, I got a divorce from somebody
(04:22):
who was mentally and physically abusive.
And I learned from that experience that, no, Aubrey, you cannot keep it inside.
Actually, you need to actually show those emotions and put yourself out there
and you need to stand up for yourself because guess what? Nobody else is standing up for you.
And that is true. It was absolutely true.
(04:42):
But what happened after that is I went directly into a defensive,
I would say more masculine mode.
There's nothing wrong with masculine.
Touch on that kind of energy several times in the past episodes,
but basically leading with masculine energy is very defensive and it's not natural
for a lot of us women to be stuck in that mode, but it is something that comes
(05:04):
up as a defense mechanism.
And so for me in this situation, it was absolutely a defense mechanism for me
where I was going to, you know, call you out.
If you said something to me that was disrespectful, if you said something to
me that made me feel less then?
I don't care who you are. I did not care who you are. I was going to call you out.
(05:26):
When things happened to me in my life during this next phase,
where I was in this masculine and defense mechanism and super wounded,
okay, that's what I want you to get here. I was in a super wounded phase.
So when things would go wrong with me in life, and I really didn't have anyone
to blame, well, I would blame God, right?
And I would blame, I would still find someone to blame, even if it was my fault,
(05:46):
or even if it was just one of those things that were We're pretty crappy all around.
So there was always this victim mentality during this phase.
There was always this extra anxiety and anger.
You know, my husband and I even, I mean, we've been married for 18 years,
but when I was in this particular phase, I remember it was like I would lash out.
I mean, I didn't really yell at him per se, but I mean, you do something wrong, I'm going to tell you.
(06:11):
So, you know, if I expect something different, then I'm going to tell you, right?
So there was no kind of compromise or companionship in that,
is there, when one person in the relationship is overbearing and can't let something slide,
literally just cannot, has to be nitpicky about certain things.
It's just not really good all around for that relationship.
(06:33):
So I was being that person, but he still loved me.
But I mean, it's just like this phase. And I can easily look back at that and
say, wow, I had no idea at the time, no idea that,
I was allowing myself to spiral out of control over things that were just plain ridiculous.
(06:55):
The same way I can sit down and have a conversation with someone now and be
like, wow, that person is obviously upset about something that has nothing to do with me.
I was in that and you don't really notice.
You really don't because you're in this mode of honestly trying to survive.
You're trying to survive through all of this different trauma that you never knew how to process.
(07:17):
And I mean, you feel like what you're doing is absolutely correct 100%, right?
So it's very interesting and kind of difficult to think back to that Aubrey.
And I'm summarizing it as between the ages of, let's say, 23 and about 33. Right?
There was definitely better times and worse times, okay? Because at the beginning
(07:39):
of that, that's when I went through even depression and stuff.
So really, really close to that Saturn return, if you know anything about it.
Those years are not usually easy.
But yeah, so I look back at that person and I'm like, she honestly,
you guys, she had no clue. She absolutely had no clue.
And I had overcame this huge, huge traumatic situation in my first marriage
(08:04):
where my family thought I was going to die in that marriage.
And just leaving everything to come out the other side and then be super defensive
and super in attack mode and just feeling like I always need to make people understand me, right?
And I had to make them. So I went from one extreme, which was underreacting to overreacting.
(08:26):
And then I landed where I'm at now, which is is the Aubrey in the middle that
realizes that life is not perfect, nor will it ever be.
But the best thing I could do for myself is to be able to stay in that mode
of not under and not overreacting, making decisions like based off of more emotional intelligence.
(08:48):
This took me a long time to get to.
Now, the reason why this is tying all in today is because I had talked earlier
about how I have, You know, these coaches in the past that have told me,
you know, you have to do this one thing.
And what they always say is that you need to be authentic and you need to stand for something.
(09:08):
You know, I spent a lot of my life only having people that loved me or ignored me, right?
There was not really any hate towards me, let's say.
So it's weird for me to think that somebody has a dislike towards me.
But at the same time, this is what my coaches wanted me to do.
(09:29):
They wanted me to get to a spot to where I was so open and honest and authentic
that somebody, somebody out there, you guys is going to hate me.
And here I am. I've arrived.
I've arrived on the other side of that. And it's so bizarre because on one end,
I want to revert back to that first Aubrey, right? right, who was underreacting
(09:52):
that wants to go cry in a corner for like 12 days.
And then there was the second Aubrey who was overreacting, who would unleash
everything, you know, and I don't want to say share it all over the internet
because I don't think I ever really did anything like that.
But just like, call up people I know and be like, can you believe this happened?
I just got to tell you what happened. Can you believe this person did this?
(10:14):
And I'm not there either. That doesn't feel aligned. It doesn't even feel aligned
for me me to really even tell the story of how this came out. So I'm not going to.
But what I will say is that on the other side, I'm feeling pretty,
pretty confident with where I'm at.
And I want you guys to be there too. I want every person that I know in my life
(10:35):
to get to this point where there's enough emotional intelligence where we can
say, well, that sucks, right?
It's not like a great feeling to be hated or to be disliked or be put down or
be talked about. That's not a great feeling ever, right?
But understanding that it really has nothing to do with me, right?
It really has to do with which stage in that person's life are they at.
(10:59):
It's possible maybe that they're in that defensive mode over things, right?
And this is why it's so crucial for me in my world to be able to attract people
to me that are absolutely ready for this work.
That's you if you're listening. If you listen this far, that's you,
okay? I'm just saying. But there's a lot of people out there that...
(11:23):
Are so in the victim phase or are so in defensive mode that they cannot possibly,
possibly look in on themselves and say, okay, I'm going to let this go. This is holding me back.
This is making me miserable, whatever.
They cannot do that. It's not in their realm of possibilities with where their mindset is.
(11:45):
And even as I'm speaking about this, I'm getting a a little nudge to talk a
little bit about people around us, maybe our family members,
maybe you have a spouse or a child even, an older teenager, whatever,
people in your lives that are in one of these phases where you can tell they
(12:06):
either underreact or they overreact.
And when we think about those people, we think, well, there's no hope for them,
or I'm going to have to remove any any ties with them. I'm going to have to walk away.
You know, we have, some of us are in situations where we even quit a job over
a boss that's maybe in one of these, you know, most likely the defensive mode one, Aubrey number two.
(12:28):
But we have to walk away from something sometimes because the way that people
are acting about situations is just not in line with the way that they should be.
And so, and I hate using the word should, but you know, a healthier emotional
emotional space would be to be able to process emotions correctly, right?
(12:48):
So just know that if you have those people in your lives and you're thinking,
oh my gosh, there's just no hope for them. They're never going to understand this.
Maybe if it's your husband, maybe he's never going to let me spend an extra
$2,000 on getting emotional and mental health therapy for this kind situation or whatever.
(13:08):
Just know that leading with example and being that person that's like, you know what?
I'm not going to let this get me down. I'm going to think about it and I'm going
to process it and just let it go, bless and release.
Being that person is so much more rewarding in life and it is truly the ultimate leader, right?
(13:33):
This person who can process things, who can inspire people around them,
who can make sure that they stay in this healthy emotional state where they're
not holding onto things, but they're also not willy-nilly throwing them about
at other people like crazy.
That is a beautiful place to be in. And honestly, we need so many more leaders, you guys,
(13:55):
but not in the sense of just having them, but actually leading with their their
energy, with their choices, with their awareness, with their spirituality,
all of that. We absolutely need that.
If you've ever had a conversation with a friend and they're like,
oh my gosh, you're so inspiring, or you're a really good leader,
(14:16):
you would be really good at this, right? And it's like a leadership job.
That's a hint, you guys. That's a hint. We need more of you.
If you are going through life and you're absolutely feeling like you're in this
hamster wheel and the same things
are going on and you feel called to take the upper hand in anything.
(14:38):
That, my friend, is your intuition telling you that it is time to level up.
And if that's you and you are feeling that call, I absolutely encourage you
to look at your emotional health.
Look at the state of your mind. Where are you at in this crazy little list I just made?
(15:01):
Where are you at? You might be in between two. you might be
closer to my end of things how i am now what
does that feel like if you know that you've been super
defensive and it's always felt right to you but it's starting to
feel uncomfortable and not aligned that's because
you're ready for a shift you are ready to
level up okay so so if you are feeling the call to change your life in any way
(15:29):
whatsoever if this talk about deep healing is something that sounds intriguing
to you and sounds like maybe there might be a place there for you,
then I'm telling you that there is a place there for you. There absolutely is.
And just being able to come to terms with the fact that you're ready for a shift is such a big deal.
(15:51):
And it's not something to take lightly. It's not something to overlook.
It's not something to say, oh, you know, in a couple of years,
I'll worry about it then.
And imagine how different your life would be if you shifted out of the underacting
or the overreacting situation and you shifted more into a, okay,
(16:12):
stuff happens. Here I am.
Let me see if I need to worry about anything here. Nope, I don't. Okay, I'm okay.
I'm going to be fine because I have my own confidence.
My confidence is not based on whether or not other people like me.
My confidence is first and foremost in my God and being able to establish myself
(16:37):
as someone who is precious and someone who is very,
very much unconditionally loved and someone that is doing work to help others on this earth.
That is my foundation. And that can be yours too, in whichever way you need
to look at it. but when your foundation is in something bigger than yourself,
(17:01):
you notice that your journey is also going to be bigger.
And you notice that you don't need to answer to people who are not there,
especially people who are living like Aubrey 1 or Aubrey 2. It's not necessary.
They are in their own journey and they have their own hiccups to deal with and
they choose every day to stay there.
(17:24):
And maybe it's not a conscious choice, right? Maybe it's a subconscious thing,
which is totally also possible.
But with the amount of information we have out there now on neuroscience and
how the brain works and how our traumas are held in our bodies,
yeah, we absolutely are choosing to stay in a state of disappointment if we're
(17:48):
not willing to look outside of that.
So I love having people in my world like you guys who are open to different
things to be able to shift them in the ways that that they need.
It's very unique by person.
That is what lights my soul up because I get to take people by the hand and
walk them over to the other side of that.
(18:08):
And it's the most insane thing I've ever seen. It is seriously a delight in
so many ways to be able to watch that growth happen. And I know it's not super tangible.
I know people won't just show up and be like, yeah, look, I lost 20 pounds, right?
Because that is different than the work that I do. What I do is, how do you feel now?
(18:30):
How has your whole life, and most people will even say their personality, has changed?
So I'm sending all my gratitude and love out to this amazing group of podcast listeners.
There's a lot of you guys, and I'm just filled with joy that you choose to download
(18:51):
these episodes and you choose to listen in to what I have to say about this,
because it's important.
And it is a baby step towards being able to shift your own life.
Maybe you're not ready for the deep work. Maybe you're not feeling a call to
continue on with either one of my programs or my private courses or whatever.
And that's totally fine. Maybe just getting the idea that life could be different
(19:15):
through doing shadow work.
Maybe that's the kind of thing that you're learning now.
I hope so. All right, my friends, have a beautiful day and a wonderful weekend,
and I will see you guys next week.
I hope this podcast spoke to you in some way.
If it did, please go ahead and leave me a review and subscribe so that I know
(19:39):
you're enjoying what you hear.
And further, if you know somebody else who owns their own creative business
and struggles with anything that we spoke about,
please pass this on because it is my hope that we will be able to build a community
of like-minded individuals who love on each other and appreciate the many facets
that make our creative business so unique.
(20:01):
And lastly, check out the show notes to find my free Facebook community and
other useful links to work with me. All right, friend, see you soon.
Music.
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