December 30, 2024 • 23 mins
Hi beautiful! ♥️
Have you ever found yourself pulling away from everyone when life gets tough? You convince yourself you’re better off alone—hurting, healing, and dealing with it all by yourself. But here’s the truth: that’s a lie straight from the enemy. He knows if you surround yourself with people who love and care for you, you’ll find the healing and hope God has for you.
In today’s episode, we’re tackling: ✨ Why you feel like you have to isolate yourself ✨ The difference between healthy solitude and unhealthy isolation ✨ How to invite God-centered relationships into your life ✨ Why community is a critical piece of your healing journey
I’ll share personal stories, biblical truth, and practical steps to break free from the cycle of isolation and embrace the people God has placed in your life to lift you up!
Grab your journal, hit play, and let’s step into healing together.
Don’t forget to JOIN the Prayer Challenge happening Jan 6-10th! https://whop.com/thehealingcircle/ 🤍
Xo, Dani
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
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I cannot tell you how many times I hear people talk about how they want more community, they want a sisterhood, but they tend to isolate themselves, and that they need their alone time, and how they actually don't like people.
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.999And it's it's this it's this crazy like push and pull and I know because I've felt that same way too um, and sometimes most people know that they isolate themselves, but it's because they Don't feel like exerting enough energy to put themselves around other people. 3 00:00:37,609.999 --> 00:00:44,885.657401016 So they just avoid people And they have this belief, this might be you, that they have to do things alone. 4 00:00:44,885.657401016 --> 00:00:46,95.657401016 They have to do life alone. 5 00:00:46,95.657401016 --> 00:01:24,253.142057559 They have to struggle alone, hurt alone, heal alone, be at this low energy state alone, feel anxious or sad or even depressed all alone And I have to tell you like I I want to break down that lie because You feeling like you have to be alone and go through this alone and have to isolate yourself To protect other people or to protect you That is a lie straight from the pit of hell The devil wants you to be alone because he knows if you got around people who loved you and who care about you, he wouldn't have you right where he wants you anymore. 6 00:01:24,868.142057559 --> 00:01:28,628.142057559 When you are alone, you are a target for the enemy. 7 00:01:29,78.142057559 --> 00:01:54,492.47795515 And this is seriously, like, such an important topic and training because it's a huge part of the healing process that a lot of people neglect or they just don't, they feel like they can just heal on their own or that, to be alone is healing and there's a part of that that is truth, but this is what we're going to break down today. 8 00:01:54,512.47795515 --> 00:02:22,923.96056018 Okay, so we're going to cover the difference between isolation and solitude, why you feel like you have to isolate, Why community is part of the healing journey and why it's essential And then how to get more god centered relationships in your life So if this sounds like what you need at this point in time lock in grab your journal we're gonna dive straight into it Hey beautiful! Welcome to the Heal from Toxic Relationships podcast. 9 00:02:23,43.96056018 --> 00:02:45,743.96056018 Are you ready to break free from toxic relationship patterns and fully embrace a life filled with confidence, joy, and purpose? Do you find yourself questioning your self worth and wondering what God's plan for your life is? Or maybe you deeply fear being alone and struggle with the lack of boundaries due to your people pleasing tendencies. 10 00:02:45,793.95956018 --> 00:02:47,333.95956018 Well, sis, you're not alone. 11 00:02:47,403.96056018 --> 00:02:48,533.96056018 I've been there, too. 12 00:02:48,643.96056018 --> 00:02:55,813.96056018 Hey, I'm Dani, a Christian life coach, wife, recovering people pleaser, And a total girl's girl. 13 00:02:55,933.96056018 --> 00:03:07,73.96056018 For 10 years, I was stuck in a cycle of toxic, non committed relationships, and searching for my worth in men, my accomplishments, and the praise of other people. 14 00:03:07,113.96056018 --> 00:03:12,643.96056018 Until I found out how to heal my past emotional wounds with Christ at the center. 15 00:03:12,808.96056018 --> 00:03:27,988.96056018 In this podcast, you will find faith based healing tools, confidence building tips, and healthy relationship skills so that you become a God fearing, confident woman who attracts your husband while walking in your purpose with God. 16 00:03:28,128.95956018 --> 00:03:31,98.96056018 Grab your favorite mocktail and pop in the AirPods. 17 00:03:31,228.96056018 --> 00:03:37,248.96056018 It's time to overshare and overcome these obstacles together, one step at a time. 18 00:03:37,475.62722685 --> 00:03:45,335.62722685 Surprise! We are going to jumpstart 2025 with a prayer challenge. 19 00:03:45,695.62722685 --> 00:04:00,755.62622685 If you feel like you need just this boost of energy, this boost of faith, confidence, or even peace in your life, you really want to get in God's presence and hear directly from Him what He has planned for you this year. 20 00:04:01,155.62722685 --> 00:04:13,835.62722685 And if that's not your desire, I highly encourage it because when you do this, when you can get into a place where you are sitting with the Lord, you are inviting him in, you are giving him the first of your year. 21 00:04:14,275.62722685 --> 00:04:15,825.62672685 This is where the magic happens. 22 00:04:15,825.62672685 --> 00:04:22,946.65393382 This is where you can get a word from God that can sustain you for your entire year or even multiple years to come. 23 00:04:23,159.42060805 --> 00:04:27,609.42160805 Just one word from God is exactly what can change your life. 24 00:04:27,859.42160805 --> 00:04:29,439.42160805 It can change your situation. 25 00:04:29,699.42160805 --> 00:04:31,299.42160805 It could change your thought process. 26 00:04:31,978.32047565 --> 00:04:34,98.32047565 A word from God is what you need. 27 00:04:34,498.32047565 --> 00:04:39,648.32047565 And so, this is why I'm going to be hosting a 5 day prayer challenge. 28 00:04:39,888.32047565 --> 00:04:43,458.32047565 You can insert fasting in there, that's what I'm going to be doing. 29 00:04:43,978.32047565 --> 00:04:53,188.32097565 But this is a time where you are dedicating to the lord and I want to help you do this so the prayer challenge is going to go from january 6. 30 00:04:53,188.32097565 --> 00:05:09,510.95230749 That's a monday all the way to the 10th That's that friday What i'm hoping this will do for you is it will jumpstart a habit of prayer help you fall in love with prayer And give you the clarity and direction that you're looking for for your new year. 31 00:05:09,612.03230871 --> 00:05:13,156.55449315 So if you want to come and join that, you can join at. 32 00:05:13,167.33597461 --> 00:05:13,757.33597461 wop. 33 00:05:14,237.33597461 --> 00:05:16,897.33597461 com forward slash the healing circle. 34 00:05:17,147.33597461 --> 00:05:19,907.33497461 That's wop w h o p. 35 00:05:20,327.33597461 --> 00:05:22,657.33597461 com slash the healing circle. 36 00:05:22,825.42963473 --> 00:05:24,495.42963473 I'm so freaking pumped for it. 37 00:05:24,495.42963473 --> 00:05:26,25.42963473 Go ahead and get plugged in. 38 00:05:26,99.19121464 --> 00:05:27,529.19121464 I can't wait to do this with you. 39 00:05:28,940.75366824 --> 00:05:36,70.75366824 kind of reflecting on my life in areas where I may have moved into isolating myself. 40 00:05:36,840.75366824 --> 00:05:40,680.75266824 It's funny, I've always kind of been forced to not be alone. 41 00:05:41,210.75366824 --> 00:05:49,300.75266824 I've always had roommates, I've never lived by myself, and I've always been involved in extra stuff, different groups, etc. 42 00:05:49,735.75366824 --> 00:05:53,15.75366824 So I was around people quite often. 43 00:05:53,175.75366824 --> 00:05:57,375.75366824 Um, and I'm naturally more of a people person after COVID. 44 00:05:57,375.75366824 --> 00:06:01,486.19845985 I kind of moved into having more of this desire to isolate myself. 45 00:06:01,486.19845985 --> 00:06:04,506.19745985 And I think that's a lot, a lot of us can, can attest to that. 46 00:06:05,86.19745985 --> 00:06:12,716.19745985 But I, I do have two instances that I want to share with you and the difference between these two friends. 47 00:06:13,17.37106372 --> 00:06:19,457.27106372 Both are great, but they both gave me something different in this time where I didn't know what to do. 48 00:06:19,568.47882766 --> 00:06:27,608.47782766 Was struggling so I remember when my heart was crushed for that for the very first time first heartbreak and my friend It was funny. 49 00:06:27,608.47882766 --> 00:06:38,468.47882766 She was actually going through a breakup at the same time with her boyfriend which was also like our boyfriends were best friends, so It was just kind of like perfect. 50 00:06:38,478.47882766 --> 00:06:46,832.98092142 We were destined to to go through this together and and I remember she literally stayed over my house for two full weeks. 51 00:06:47,182.98092142 --> 00:07:00,92.97992142 We did not do anything, we were just there with each other, and her presence was comforting to me, and vice versa, my presence was comforting to her, like we needed each other in that moment. 52 00:07:00,832.98092142 --> 00:07:18,797.98092142 And, you know, since my walk with God I have witnessed the power, and I understand it now, of putting yourself around other people who can actually speak into your identity and pull you forward, pull you out of the pit. 53 00:07:19,7.98092142 --> 00:07:25,257.97992142 And so just recently, like maybe a few months ago, I was feeling really alone. 54 00:07:25,497.98092142 --> 00:07:31,67.97992142 Like I'm living, I'm married, I'm in this house with my husband, but I felt so alone. 55 00:07:31,717.98092142 --> 00:07:37,377.98092142 And it was when I thought I was possibly pregnant and I found out that I wasn't. 56 00:07:37,827.98092142 --> 00:07:45,917.98092142 And this devastation that I was not expecting to feel because it wasn't something we were planning for Um just hit me. 57 00:07:46,287.98092142 --> 00:08:27,747.72205038 I was devastated and I Felt so alone In that and going through that and um, I remember, you know at that time I All of my content on social media was all these moms with their newborn babies And it was feeding into that loneliness and isolation feeling but then I decided to Invite some friends into that moment with me, you know Go against that voice in my head that was saying like this is silly to be sad about you know, but I reached out to friends to put myself in worship services and to go to church and I saw a massive difference. 58 00:08:27,787.72205038 --> 00:08:40,75.11799643 I not only felt God's peace from him directly in those worship services, but I had friends that reminded me of God's promises for me. 59 00:08:40,332.98220533 --> 00:08:46,332.98220533 And when they reminded me of God's promises, I felt a healing starting to happen. 60 00:08:46,332.98220533 --> 00:08:58,642.98220533 Like, these were words that I needed to hear to combat the lies and the grief and the things that the enemy was feeding into me that was taking place in my heart. 61 00:08:58,840.65664144 --> 00:09:03,90.65664144 And both of these memories with these friends are sweet memories for me. 62 00:09:03,510.65664144 --> 00:09:06,740.65664144 And it's cool to see the difference in both. 63 00:09:06,820.65564144 --> 00:09:10,30.65564144 Both super valuable, exactly what I needed in those moments. 64 00:09:10,85.75664144 --> 00:09:28,145.55664144 And I'm going to share with you why we put ourselves in that isolation mode, what God wants for you instead, and then the perspective shift you need to start inviting more people into your life and how to start doing that. 65 00:09:28,520.14098439 --> 00:09:29,450.14098439 Hope you're ready. 66 00:09:29,470.14098439 --> 00:09:35,280.14098439 We're going to dive right into the first point, which is talking about why you isolate yourself. 67 00:09:35,350.14098439 --> 00:09:46,250.14098439 So when we are in pain or we're hurting, we tend to want to lean into that pain, to magnify that pain and feel more of it. 68 00:09:46,770.14098439 --> 00:09:47,740.14098439 It feels good. 69 00:09:47,740.14098439 --> 00:09:54,430.14098439 You know, like this is why when we're sad, we want to watch a sad love movie or listen to sad music. 70 00:09:54,842.37891623 --> 00:10:00,89.71065684 Why do we want to do this? Because it's ultimately validating how we feel. 71 00:10:00,539.71065684 --> 00:10:07,69.70965684 Typically when we're angry, we want to go to someone to validate our feelings, right? To say, oh, you know what, you're right, you have a right to be angry. 72 00:10:07,259.70965684 --> 00:10:10,509.70965684 Same thing when we're sad, oh, you have a right to feel sad. 73 00:10:11,109.71065684 --> 00:10:15,339.71065684 Like, feel, feel more of this, here, have, have more reason to be sad. 74 00:10:15,750.8061882 --> 00:10:22,200.8061882 And the thing that we're going through that is, that is causing this pain, we probably think it's unfair. 75 00:10:22,671.65132168 --> 00:10:28,261.65132168 And so we want to know that the truth is, you know what, yes, that is unfair. 76 00:10:28,511.65132168 --> 00:10:30,281.65082168 You have a right to feel that way. 77 00:10:30,281.65082168 --> 00:10:32,1.65032168 Once again, you have a right to think that. 78 00:10:32,264.00694334 --> 00:10:34,884.00694334 Whatever we're feeling, we want to seek validation for it. 79 00:10:34,974.00694334 --> 00:10:38,514.00694334 That's most, most people, right? It's our fleshly instinct. 80 00:10:38,979.08124354 --> 00:10:46,270.47334406 so that's one reason, another reason is we may think that no one wants to be around us when we aren't at our best. 81 00:10:46,370.47334406 --> 00:10:48,940.47334406 And so we make that decision for them. 82 00:10:49,395.47334406 --> 00:10:50,515.47334406 I want to highlight that. 83 00:10:50,815.47334406 --> 00:10:58,115.47334406 We make that decision for other people because we assume they don't want to be around us when we aren't at our best. 84 00:10:58,379.97919881 --> 00:11:05,99.97919881 So you think to yourself, okay, let me just do me until I'm ready to put on my best self and be around other people. 85 00:11:05,518.23995125 --> 00:11:22,73.23895125 And this right here, I'm just going to be really real, okay, that's what we do on this This right here is pride showing up, it's this control showing up, or it's a type of people pleasing slash fear of not being accepted. 86 00:11:22,486.25611642 --> 00:11:34,233.86914298 Or it could be that you're used to being the peppy energized person so you don't want people to see you different than what you've shown them in the past. 87 00:11:34,582.69826569 --> 00:11:46,832.69726569 You know, to show your weaknesses, to show your weak moments, to be the party pooper so you can say when it's honestly just humanness, nobody is out there 100 percent best all the time. 88 00:11:47,285.06486483 --> 00:11:53,635.06486483 And there's, there can be so many other reasons as to why you move into this, but I feel like those are the biggest ones. 89 00:11:54,155.06486483 --> 00:12:05,42.63937318 And if you have a different one, like if you're like, this is the reason why I think that I isolate myself, please come on over, share it with us at the link that I shared above for the prayer challenge. 90 00:12:05,72.64037318 --> 00:12:13,472.64037318 I'd love to hear, like, what it is, like, where you're coming from, what's underneath the isolation, so that way I can provide any support possible with that. 91 00:12:13,862.37585411 --> 00:12:28,746.85754507 but ultimately, every reason why He is just the enemy on the other side of that, like, hyping up that decision, like, magnifying that, making you feel like, yes, you shouldn't want to be around other people because you're going to bring them down. 92 00:12:28,776.85854507 --> 00:12:31,216.85854507 He is the one filling your mind with those lies. 93 00:12:31,443.05530016 --> 00:12:35,373.05630016 Because, like I said before, he doesn't want people to uplift you. 94 00:12:35,943.05630016 --> 00:12:47,771.43976727 When you are down in this mo, in this mood, when you are isolating yourself, your mind becomes a perfect playground for him to insert his thoughts and cause you to spiral. 95 00:12:48,11.43976727 --> 00:12:51,11.43976727 Why? Because you already are feeling low. 96 00:12:51,71.53976727 --> 00:12:54,771.43976727 So, the things you're watching, being in isolation, are making you feel low. 97 00:12:54,771.43976727 --> 00:12:56,681.43976727 It's not bringing you to a higher vibration. 98 00:12:56,681.43976727 --> 00:12:58,921.43976727 It's not bringing you in alignment with God's promises. 99 00:12:59,211.43876727 --> 00:13:04,241.43976727 So why would he want anything to come against that? He's going to heighten this state. 100 00:13:04,527.1272453 --> 00:13:09,817.1272453 And this is something that you have to know the enemy is behind because we don't want him to win. 101 00:13:09,897.1272453 --> 00:13:11,167.1272453 I know you don't want him to win. 102 00:13:11,456.00350655 --> 00:13:12,606.00350655 He's already defeated. 103 00:13:12,866.00350655 --> 00:13:18,746.00350655 And so we just have to recognize that this is him playing with us here in this state. 104 00:13:18,917.60350655 --> 00:13:32,854.00514144 And so I want you to shift your perspective in this because what if this is what we were created for? I'm sure you have a desire to be a good friend and you have a desire to be in some sort of community. 105 00:13:33,469.00514144 --> 00:13:38,170.78892306 This is exactly, what Women of God's Sisterhood is for. 106 00:13:38,170.78892306 --> 00:13:46,17.4708636 It's not just to have the cute parties and to, to post up on social together and to, you know, go on cute coffee dates. 107 00:13:46,147.4718636 --> 00:13:49,47.4718636 It's to be with each other in the struggle. 108 00:13:49,806.62276056 --> 00:13:53,726.62276056 When one of us is down, oh my gosh, what an honor it is. 109 00:13:53,806.62276056 --> 00:14:01,346.62176056 I could, like, as a friend, what an honor it is to come and be invited to walk alongside that person who needs that support to pick them up. 110 00:14:02,166.62276056 --> 00:14:03,86.62276056 That's an honor. 111 00:14:03,336.62276056 --> 00:14:06,26.62176056 That's what being a friend means. 112 00:14:06,793.66447434 --> 00:14:14,173.66447434 And so you're robbing people of that opportunity to be that source of love and comfort for you. 113 00:14:14,929.23929341 --> 00:14:29,599.23929341 now I want to go into the second point, which is talking about the difference between isolation and solitude, because I want you to know that it's not always a negative thing to be alone, okay? We need our alone time, right? It's healthy, it's healthy to have that. 114 00:14:29,919.23929341 --> 00:14:37,159.23929341 In fact, Jesus withdrew many times to be alone with the Father, to rest, to recharge, and to just be. 115 00:14:37,834.23929341 --> 00:14:45,835.8061632 Sometimes it was to get vision from him, to get a word from him, to just sit and, and be with him. 116 00:14:46,634.83704207 --> 00:14:49,594.83604207 And so this is necessary for you to do as well. 117 00:14:49,844.83704207 --> 00:14:56,654.83604207 So I want to share the difference between the two so you know what's healthy isolation and what's unhealthy isolation. 118 00:14:57,169.04217655 --> 00:15:01,339.04217655 Unhealthy isolation is if you find yourself sitting alone. 119 00:15:01,664.04317655 --> 00:15:05,864.04317655 Feeling depressed, anxious, or dwelling on negative thoughts. 120 00:15:06,334.04317655 --> 00:15:10,684.04317655 If you withdraw from friends who reach out to you, that are checking on you. 121 00:15:11,114.04317655 --> 00:15:14,484.04317655 If you find yourself stuck in consumption mode. 122 00:15:14,794.04217655 --> 00:15:21,534.04317655 Doom scrolling on social media, uh, comparing yourself, eating away your feelings. 123 00:15:21,974.04317655 --> 00:15:33,404.04267655 Consuming just lots of TV or moving into a super hyper overachieving work mode to combat being alone with your thoughts. 124 00:15:33,404.04267655 --> 00:15:38,759.38325712 Like you are doing anything that you can to, avoid sitting alone with your thoughts. 125 00:15:39,299.38325712 --> 00:15:47,59.38325712 Okay? You are putting yourself in a super busy mode or a super lazy sloth mode. 126 00:15:47,819.38225712 --> 00:15:51,639.38325712 And this is What I believe is unhealthy isolation. 127 00:15:52,159.38325712 --> 00:15:55,989.38325712 When you are avoiding the pain with other things, to put it simply. 128 00:15:56,316.87659046 --> 00:16:23,714.3700449 Now On the opposite side what a healthy alone time and isolation Or which I honestly would call it solitude versus isolation Because this is it's a necessary solitude is necessary for us And what solitude looks like is a time of of reflection Reflection on the situation, what you learn from it, what you gain from it. 129 00:16:24,74.3700449 --> 00:16:27,944.3700449 Feeling the feelings of grief because we're not robots. 130 00:16:27,944.3700449 --> 00:16:30,244.3700449 Like, it's okay to feel the feelings. 131 00:16:30,594.3690449 --> 00:16:35,514.3700449 The feelings of heartache, the feelings of pain, hurt, whatever it is that you're feeling. 132 00:16:36,134.3690449 --> 00:16:38,364.3700449 But not letting it consume you. 133 00:16:38,907.29474553 --> 00:16:40,857.2947455 Not letting it consume your mind. 134 00:16:41,232.4166757 --> 00:16:42,382.4166757 Or consume your joy. 135 00:16:42,392.4166757 --> 00:16:42,422.4166757 Okay. 136 00:16:42,860.945598 --> 00:16:52,640.945598 You are, when you're in this solitude, you're inviting God into those, these moments to heal those parts of you and to give you this clarity and direction. 137 00:16:52,660.945598 --> 00:17:06,696.0875607 As you move forward, you don't shut people out, but you create boundaries that you feel like you need to be able to hear from God and be in tune with what your soul is telling you that you need. 138 00:17:07,376.0875607 --> 00:17:20,661.0770214 So I know for some of us, we could Put ourselves in groups to avoid again just being alone, but maybe we aren't um, Like actually developing deep relationships. 139 00:17:20,661.0780214 --> 00:17:23,321.0770214 We're just around people so we don't have to be alone. 140 00:17:23,331.0770214 --> 00:17:38,383.769887 Like that is definitely something That we can tend to do especially more of like the people people people so Solitude is really important for you the healthy alone time is a time for you to reflect and look inward. 141 00:17:38,763.770887 --> 00:17:48,60.244917 So that way you can, heal, understand what it is that you need, understand your next steps, and to continue to move forward. 142 00:17:48,453.6924549 --> 00:17:49,673.6934549 Right? It's a progression. 143 00:17:49,693.6924549 --> 00:17:54,479.1705556 It's recognizing where you are, not being judgmental, and moving forward at the same time. 144 00:17:54,731.3112869 --> 00:18:11,357.1481923 Versus the unhealthy side is you're over consuming you're being avoidant ignoring Something suppressing this is in the unhealthy side of the scale So, now, the third point I want us to talk about, why God wants you in God centered community to heal. 145 00:18:11,643.8990074 --> 00:18:18,425.5857733 And I want, I want to, I want to like break this down, because even if you have one godly friend, you're winning. 146 00:18:19,45.5857733 --> 00:18:21,85.5857733 Okay, that is community, man. 147 00:18:21,375.5857733 --> 00:18:22,495.5857733 One godly friend. 148 00:18:22,914.421938 --> 00:18:31,574.421938 And it could also be a group of godly community who you may not be super close to, but you know they love God, and they would pray with you. 149 00:18:31,744.421938 --> 00:18:33,934.420938 They would listen without judgment. 150 00:18:34,518.2172355 --> 00:18:56,838.2172355 So you either have one friend who can be this for you or you have a group of women or group of people who can play that part for you, right? And it's on your side to start opening up and being more vulnerable and inviting people into like your true life, right? Your true feelings because this is where that connection forms. 151 00:18:57,338.2172355 --> 00:19:19,111.2134747 So I want to bring us to scripture because this is a truth James five 16 tells us, therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed, the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. 152 00:19:19,466.6704388 --> 00:19:51,212.8550659 So why would we, if we know that? When we are praying for one another when you we are around people who will pray over us Who we can tell and confess to it's either sins a private sin Um or something that you're struggling with like this this practice of confession and sharing Is so powerful the the effect of this is for your healing to take place The prayer we Underestimate the power of prayer man. 153 00:19:51,212.8550659 --> 00:19:52,792.8550659 So join the prayer challenge. 154 00:19:52,812.8550659 --> 00:20:11,911.1633576 This is your sign God is telling us that healing comes when we confess with our mouth and receive with prayer Not the other side, not isolating yourself from people and, and wanting to hide, but bringing things to light, being open, being transparent, being real with people who love God. 155 00:20:12,81.1633576 --> 00:20:13,921.1633576 Again, this is their joy. 156 00:20:14,211.1633576 --> 00:20:15,131.1633576 This is their purpose. 157 00:20:15,131.2633576 --> 00:20:23,977.1317908 This is why they show up to church, why they show up to groups to help heal the broken hearted and to be a friend to those who need one. 158 00:20:24,251.7458048 --> 00:20:25,1.7458048 this is. 159 00:20:26,127.7096389 --> 00:20:27,537.7096389 a believer's purpose. 160 00:20:27,819.5496797 --> 00:20:40,214.2377129 So how you can start to do this, how can you take your first step I'm, not sure where you are in your walk right now, but I would say the first step is going to church, physically going to a local church. 161 00:20:40,274.2377129 --> 00:21:00,500.8922189 So that way you can be in the body of Christ, even if you don't talk to anybody your first first time, I would challenge you to go when they do the altar call and receive prayer It shocked me how many people that actually have never done that before in different small groups that I was in I love going to get prayer man. 162 00:21:00,520.8922189 --> 00:21:05,630.8932189 Like yes pray for me I need someone to come into agreement with me. 163 00:21:06,100.8932189 --> 00:21:07,370.8932189 That's a gift. 164 00:21:07,680.8932189 --> 00:21:15,616.8596364 So Go to a local church You Go receive prayer from someone and then get involved in a small group. 165 00:21:16,66.8596364 --> 00:21:20,16.8596364 Small groups changed my walk with Christ. 166 00:21:20,289.7502614 --> 00:21:21,469.7492614 They were so healing. 167 00:21:21,469.7502614 --> 00:21:22,719.7502614 They were so fun. 168 00:21:22,949.7502614 --> 00:21:26,276.4050909 They made church feel like a home, made it feel smaller. 169 00:21:26,451.6597728 --> 00:21:28,31.6617728 And this is the best way to make friends. 170 00:21:28,291.6597728 --> 00:21:53,900.1962133 Like some of my greatest friends have come through small groups and through signing up to serve Because you're around people who, like, like minded people, people who want to grow, people who want to, you know, fulfill their purpose and their call in the body of Christ, now disclaimer, not everybody's perfect, right? People have their struggles and their battles, but this is what makes us greater together in community and in unity. 171 00:21:54,177.6999828 --> 00:22:06,917.6999828 So don't let one, um, bad experience from a past church deter you from getting involved again and getting plugged in to find that community that your heart is screaming for. 172 00:22:07,335.520478 --> 00:22:13,605.519478 And, in addition to that, there's a bunch of different Christian communities online that you can be a part of. 173 00:22:13,691.4453811 --> 00:22:21,71.4453811 Some of my best friends I have yet to meet in person because I've met them through an online community. 174 00:22:21,333.6446725 --> 00:22:28,480.5698497 And, I mean, your first option, join our free new community that we're creating, for the prayer challenge. 175 00:22:28,734.2896319 --> 00:22:32,695.0711134 January 6 to the 10th you can sign up at wop. 176 00:22:33,175.0711134 --> 00:22:35,835.0711134 com forward slash the healing circle. 177 00:22:36,85.0711134 --> 00:22:38,845.0701134 That's wop w h o p. 178 00:22:39,265.0711134 --> 00:22:41,595.0711134 com slash the healing circle. 179 00:22:41,763.1647735 --> 00:22:53,391.2911744 Come in make a post introduce yourself So that way you practice putting yourself out there and you will find, I promise you, the connections that you're meant to find. 180 00:22:53,741.486675 --> 00:22:55,341.486675 So I pray this episode bless you. 181 00:22:55,371.485675 --> 00:23:03,341.486675 I can't wait to do this prayer challenge with you And I can't wait to hear about the new friendships and sisterhood that you start to cultivate in your life. 182 00:23:03,523.2944888 --> 00:23:04,603.2944888 I love you so much. 183 00:23:04,613.2944888 --> 00:23:05,613.2944888 I'll see you back here. 184 00:23:05,613.2944888 --> 00:23:07,833.2944888 Same time, same place next week. 185 00:23:07,881.023829 --> 00:23:11,385.9974734 And go out and have the best week because you can. 186 00:23:11,774.6109718 --> 00:23:12,664.6109718 Hey, beautiful. 187 00:23:12,704.6109718 --> 00:23:16,274.6109718 I hope you loved hanging with me today and enjoyed the episode. 188 00:23:16,574.6109718 --> 00:23:30,704.6109718 If so, would you take just 30 seconds and share it with someone you love who may also want to heal from past relationships and love themselves again? Also, please scroll down and leave a quick written review for the show on Apple podcasts. 189 00:23:30,704.6109718 --> 00:23:36,104.6109718 This is the main way we can get this message out to our girlfriends all around the world. 190 00:23:36,379.6109718 --> 00:23:41,759.6109718 And it also just really blesses me to know and hear how this podcast is helping you. 191 00:23:41,829.6109718 --> 00:23:42,249.6109718 Okay. 192 00:23:42,349.6109718 --> 00:23:44,919.6109718 I need to get out of my sleds and get ready for date night. 193 00:23:45,79.6109718 --> 00:23:51,49.6109718 I'll meet you back here on Monday for another episode, sending you all the love until next time.
I cannot tell you how many times I hear people talk about how they want more community, they want a sisterhood, but they tend to isolate themselves, and that they need their alone time, and how they actually don't like people.
(00:17):
.999And it's it's this it's this crazy like push and pull and I know because I've felt that same way too um, and sometimes most people know that they isolate themselves, but it's because they Don't feel like exerting enough energy to put themselves around other people. 3 00:00:37,609.999 --> 00:00:44,885.657401016 So they just avoid people And they have this belief, this might be you, that they have to do things alone. 4 00:00:44,885.657401016 --> 00:00:46,95.657401016 They have to do life alone. 5 00:00:46,95.657401016 --> 00:01:24,253.142057559 They have to struggle alone, hurt alone, heal alone, be at this low energy state alone, feel anxious or sad or even depressed all alone And I have to tell you like I I want to break down that lie because You feeling like you have to be alone and go through this alone and have to isolate yourself To protect other people or to protect you That is a lie straight from the pit of hell The devil wants you to be alone because he knows if you got around people who loved you and who care about you, he wouldn't have you right where he wants you anymore. 6 00:01:24,868.142057559 --> 00:01:28,628.142057559 When you are alone, you are a target for the enemy. 7 00:01:29,78.142057559 --> 00:01:54,492.47795515 And this is seriously, like, such an important topic and training because it's a huge part of the healing process that a lot of people neglect or they just don't, they feel like they can just heal on their own or that, to be alone is healing and there's a part of that that is truth, but this is what we're going to break down today. 8 00:01:54,512.47795515 --> 00:02:22,923.96056018 Okay, so we're going to cover the difference between isolation and solitude, why you feel like you have to isolate, Why community is part of the healing journey and why it's essential And then how to get more god centered relationships in your life So if this sounds like what you need at this point in time lock in grab your journal we're gonna dive straight into it Hey beautiful! Welcome to the Heal from Toxic Relationships podcast. 9 00:02:23,43.96056018 --> 00:02:45,743.96056018 Are you ready to break free from toxic relationship patterns and fully embrace a life filled with confidence, joy, and purpose? Do you find yourself questioning your self worth and wondering what God's plan for your life is? Or maybe you deeply fear being alone and struggle with the lack of boundaries due to your people pleasing tendencies. 10 00:02:45,793.95956018 --> 00:02:47,333.95956018 Well, sis, you're not alone. 11 00:02:47,403.96056018 --> 00:02:48,533.96056018 I've been there, too. 12 00:02:48,643.96056018 --> 00:02:55,813.96056018 Hey, I'm Dani, a Christian life coach, wife, recovering people pleaser, And a total girl's girl. 13 00:02:55,933.96056018 --> 00:03:07,73.96056018 For 10 years, I was stuck in a cycle of toxic, non committed relationships, and searching for my worth in men, my accomplishments, and the praise of other people. 14 00:03:07,113.96056018 --> 00:03:12,643.96056018 Until I found out how to heal my past emotional wounds with Christ at the center. 15 00:03:12,808.96056018 --> 00:03:27,988.96056018 In this podcast, you will find faith based healing tools, confidence building tips, and healthy relationship skills so that you become a God fearing, confident woman who attracts your husband while walking in your purpose with God. 16 00:03:28,128.95956018 --> 00:03:31,98.96056018 Grab your favorite mocktail and pop in the AirPods. 17 00:03:31,228.96056018 --> 00:03:37,248.96056018 It's time to overshare and overcome these obstacles together, one step at a time. 18 00:03:37,475.62722685 --> 00:03:45,335.62722685 Surprise! We are going to jumpstart 2025 with a prayer challenge. 19 00:03:45,695.62722685 --> 00:04:00,755.62622685 If you feel like you need just this boost of energy, this boost of faith, confidence, or even peace in your life, you really want to get in God's presence and hear directly from Him what He has planned for you this year. 20 00:04:01,155.62722685 --> 00:04:13,835.62722685 And if that's not your desire, I highly encourage it because when you do this, when you can get into a place where you are sitting with the Lord, you are inviting him in, you are giving him the first of your year. 21 00:04:14,275.62722685 --> 00:04:15,825.62672685 This is where the magic happens. 22 00:04:15,825.62672685 --> 00:04:22,946.65393382 This is where you can get a word from God that can sustain you for your entire year or even multiple years to come. 23 00:04:23,159.42060805 --> 00:04:27,609.42160805 Just one word from God is exactly what can change your life. 24 00:04:27,859.42160805 --> 00:04:29,439.42160805 It can change your situation. 25 00:04:29,699.42160805 --> 00:04:31,299.42160805 It could change your thought process. 26 00:04:31,978.32047565 --> 00:04:34,98.32047565 A word from God is what you need. 27 00:04:34,498.32047565 --> 00:04:39,648.32047565 And so, this is why I'm going to be hosting a 5 day prayer challenge. 28 00:04:39,888.32047565 --> 00:04:43,458.32047565 You can insert fasting in there, that's what I'm going to be doing. 29 00:04:43,978.32047565 --> 00:04:53,188.32097565 But this is a time where you are dedicating to the lord and I want to help you do this so the prayer challenge is going to go from january 6. 30 00:04:53,188.32097565 --> 00:05:09,510.95230749 That's a monday all the way to the 10th That's that friday What i'm hoping this will do for you is it will jumpstart a habit of prayer help you fall in love with prayer And give you the clarity and direction that you're looking for for your new year. 31 00:05:09,612.03230871 --> 00:05:13,156.55449315 So if you want to come and join that, you can join at. 32 00:05:13,167.33597461 --> 00:05:13,757.33597461 wop. 33 00:05:14,237.33597461 --> 00:05:16,897.33597461 com forward slash the healing circle. 34 00:05:17,147.33597461 --> 00:05:19,907.33497461 That's wop w h o p. 35 00:05:20,327.33597461 --> 00:05:22,657.33597461 com slash the healing circle. 36 00:05:22,825.42963473 --> 00:05:24,495.42963473 I'm so freaking pumped for it. 37 00:05:24,495.42963473 --> 00:05:26,25.42963473 Go ahead and get plugged in. 38 00:05:26,99.19121464 --> 00:05:27,529.19121464 I can't wait to do this with you. 39 00:05:28,940.75366824 --> 00:05:36,70.75366824 kind of reflecting on my life in areas where I may have moved into isolating myself. 40 00:05:36,840.75366824 --> 00:05:40,680.75266824 It's funny, I've always kind of been forced to not be alone. 41 00:05:41,210.75366824 --> 00:05:49,300.75266824 I've always had roommates, I've never lived by myself, and I've always been involved in extra stuff, different groups, etc. 42 00:05:49,735.75366824 --> 00:05:53,15.75366824 So I was around people quite often. 43 00:05:53,175.75366824 --> 00:05:57,375.75366824 Um, and I'm naturally more of a people person after COVID. 44 00:05:57,375.75366824 --> 00:06:01,486.19845985 I kind of moved into having more of this desire to isolate myself. 45 00:06:01,486.19845985 --> 00:06:04,506.19745985 And I think that's a lot, a lot of us can, can attest to that. 46 00:06:05,86.19745985 --> 00:06:12,716.19745985 But I, I do have two instances that I want to share with you and the difference between these two friends. 47 00:06:13,17.37106372 --> 00:06:19,457.27106372 Both are great, but they both gave me something different in this time where I didn't know what to do. 48 00:06:19,568.47882766 --> 00:06:27,608.47782766 Was struggling so I remember when my heart was crushed for that for the very first time first heartbreak and my friend It was funny. 49 00:06:27,608.47882766 --> 00:06:38,468.47882766 She was actually going through a breakup at the same time with her boyfriend which was also like our boyfriends were best friends, so It was just kind of like perfect. 50 00:06:38,478.47882766 --> 00:06:46,832.98092142 We were destined to to go through this together and and I remember she literally stayed over my house for two full weeks. 51 00:06:47,182.98092142 --> 00:07:00,92.97992142 We did not do anything, we were just there with each other, and her presence was comforting to me, and vice versa, my presence was comforting to her, like we needed each other in that moment. 52 00:07:00,832.98092142 --> 00:07:18,797.98092142 And, you know, since my walk with God I have witnessed the power, and I understand it now, of putting yourself around other people who can actually speak into your identity and pull you forward, pull you out of the pit. 53 00:07:19,7.98092142 --> 00:07:25,257.97992142 And so just recently, like maybe a few months ago, I was feeling really alone. 54 00:07:25,497.98092142 --> 00:07:31,67.97992142 Like I'm living, I'm married, I'm in this house with my husband, but I felt so alone. 55 00:07:31,717.98092142 --> 00:07:37,377.98092142 And it was when I thought I was possibly pregnant and I found out that I wasn't. 56 00:07:37,827.98092142 --> 00:07:45,917.98092142 And this devastation that I was not expecting to feel because it wasn't something we were planning for Um just hit me. 57 00:07:46,287.98092142 --> 00:08:27,747.72205038 I was devastated and I Felt so alone In that and going through that and um, I remember, you know at that time I All of my content on social media was all these moms with their newborn babies And it was feeding into that loneliness and isolation feeling but then I decided to Invite some friends into that moment with me, you know Go against that voice in my head that was saying like this is silly to be sad about you know, but I reached out to friends to put myself in worship services and to go to church and I saw a massive difference. 58 00:08:27,787.72205038 --> 00:08:40,75.11799643 I not only felt God's peace from him directly in those worship services, but I had friends that reminded me of God's promises for me. 59 00:08:40,332.98220533 --> 00:08:46,332.98220533 And when they reminded me of God's promises, I felt a healing starting to happen. 60 00:08:46,332.98220533 --> 00:08:58,642.98220533 Like, these were words that I needed to hear to combat the lies and the grief and the things that the enemy was feeding into me that was taking place in my heart. 61 00:08:58,840.65664144 --> 00:09:03,90.65664144 And both of these memories with these friends are sweet memories for me. 62 00:09:03,510.65664144 --> 00:09:06,740.65664144 And it's cool to see the difference in both. 63 00:09:06,820.65564144 --> 00:09:10,30.65564144 Both super valuable, exactly what I needed in those moments. 64 00:09:10,85.75664144 --> 00:09:28,145.55664144 And I'm going to share with you why we put ourselves in that isolation mode, what God wants for you instead, and then the perspective shift you need to start inviting more people into your life and how to start doing that. 65 00:09:28,520.14098439 --> 00:09:29,450.14098439 Hope you're ready. 66 00:09:29,470.14098439 --> 00:09:35,280.14098439 We're going to dive right into the first point, which is talking about why you isolate yourself. 67 00:09:35,350.14098439 --> 00:09:46,250.14098439 So when we are in pain or we're hurting, we tend to want to lean into that pain, to magnify that pain and feel more of it. 68 00:09:46,770.14098439 --> 00:09:47,740.14098439 It feels good. 69 00:09:47,740.14098439 --> 00:09:54,430.14098439 You know, like this is why when we're sad, we want to watch a sad love movie or listen to sad music. 70 00:09:54,842.37891623 --> 00:10:00,89.71065684 Why do we want to do this? Because it's ultimately validating how we feel. 71 00:10:00,539.71065684 --> 00:10:07,69.70965684 Typically when we're angry, we want to go to someone to validate our feelings, right? To say, oh, you know what, you're right, you have a right to be angry. 72 00:10:07,259.70965684 --> 00:10:10,509.70965684 Same thing when we're sad, oh, you have a right to feel sad. 73 00:10:11,109.71065684 --> 00:10:15,339.71065684 Like, feel, feel more of this, here, have, have more reason to be sad. 74 00:10:15,750.8061882 --> 00:10:22,200.8061882 And the thing that we're going through that is, that is causing this pain, we probably think it's unfair. 75 00:10:22,671.65132168 --> 00:10:28,261.65132168 And so we want to know that the truth is, you know what, yes, that is unfair. 76 00:10:28,511.65132168 --> 00:10:30,281.65082168 You have a right to feel that way. 77 00:10:30,281.65082168 --> 00:10:32,1.65032168 Once again, you have a right to think that. 78 00:10:32,264.00694334 --> 00:10:34,884.00694334 Whatever we're feeling, we want to seek validation for it. 79 00:10:34,974.00694334 --> 00:10:38,514.00694334 That's most, most people, right? It's our fleshly instinct. 80 00:10:38,979.08124354 --> 00:10:46,270.47334406 so that's one reason, another reason is we may think that no one wants to be around us when we aren't at our best. 81 00:10:46,370.47334406 --> 00:10:48,940.47334406 And so we make that decision for them. 82 00:10:49,395.47334406 --> 00:10:50,515.47334406 I want to highlight that. 83 00:10:50,815.47334406 --> 00:10:58,115.47334406 We make that decision for other people because we assume they don't want to be around us when we aren't at our best. 84 00:10:58,379.97919881 --> 00:11:05,99.97919881 So you think to yourself, okay, let me just do me until I'm ready to put on my best self and be around other people. 85 00:11:05,518.23995125 --> 00:11:22,73.23895125 And this right here, I'm just going to be really real, okay, that's what we do on this This right here is pride showing up, it's this control showing up, or it's a type of people pleasing slash fear of not being accepted. 86 00:11:22,486.25611642 --> 00:11:34,233.86914298 Or it could be that you're used to being the peppy energized person so you don't want people to see you different than what you've shown them in the past. 87 00:11:34,582.69826569 --> 00:11:46,832.69726569 You know, to show your weaknesses, to show your weak moments, to be the party pooper so you can say when it's honestly just humanness, nobody is out there 100 percent best all the time. 88 00:11:47,285.06486483 --> 00:11:53,635.06486483 And there's, there can be so many other reasons as to why you move into this, but I feel like those are the biggest ones. 89 00:11:54,155.06486483 --> 00:12:05,42.63937318 And if you have a different one, like if you're like, this is the reason why I think that I isolate myself, please come on over, share it with us at the link that I shared above for the prayer challenge. 90 00:12:05,72.64037318 --> 00:12:13,472.64037318 I'd love to hear, like, what it is, like, where you're coming from, what's underneath the isolation, so that way I can provide any support possible with that. 91 00:12:13,862.37585411 --> 00:12:28,746.85754507 but ultimately, every reason why He is just the enemy on the other side of that, like, hyping up that decision, like, magnifying that, making you feel like, yes, you shouldn't want to be around other people because you're going to bring them down. 92 00:12:28,776.85854507 --> 00:12:31,216.85854507 He is the one filling your mind with those lies. 93 00:12:31,443.05530016 --> 00:12:35,373.05630016 Because, like I said before, he doesn't want people to uplift you. 94 00:12:35,943.05630016 --> 00:12:47,771.43976727 When you are down in this mo, in this mood, when you are isolating yourself, your mind becomes a perfect playground for him to insert his thoughts and cause you to spiral. 95 00:12:48,11.43976727 --> 00:12:51,11.43976727 Why? Because you already are feeling low. 96 00:12:51,71.53976727 --> 00:12:54,771.43976727 So, the things you're watching, being in isolation, are making you feel low. 97 00:12:54,771.43976727 --> 00:12:56,681.43976727 It's not bringing you to a higher vibration. 98 00:12:56,681.43976727 --> 00:12:58,921.43976727 It's not bringing you in alignment with God's promises. 99 00:12:59,211.43876727 --> 00:13:04,241.43976727 So why would he want anything to come against that? He's going to heighten this state. 100 00:13:04,527.1272453 --> 00:13:09,817.1272453 And this is something that you have to know the enemy is behind because we don't want him to win. 101 00:13:09,897.1272453 --> 00:13:11,167.1272453 I know you don't want him to win. 102 00:13:11,456.00350655 --> 00:13:12,606.00350655 He's already defeated. 103 00:13:12,866.00350655 --> 00:13:18,746.00350655 And so we just have to recognize that this is him playing with us here in this state. 104 00:13:18,917.60350655 --> 00:13:32,854.00514144 And so I want you to shift your perspective in this because what if this is what we were created for? I'm sure you have a desire to be a good friend and you have a desire to be in some sort of community. 105 00:13:33,469.00514144 --> 00:13:38,170.78892306 This is exactly, what Women of God's Sisterhood is for. 106 00:13:38,170.78892306 --> 00:13:46,17.4708636 It's not just to have the cute parties and to, to post up on social together and to, you know, go on cute coffee dates. 107 00:13:46,147.4718636 --> 00:13:49,47.4718636 It's to be with each other in the struggle. 108 00:13:49,806.62276056 --> 00:13:53,726.62276056 When one of us is down, oh my gosh, what an honor it is. 109 00:13:53,806.62276056 --> 00:14:01,346.62176056 I could, like, as a friend, what an honor it is to come and be invited to walk alongside that person who needs that support to pick them up. 110 00:14:02,166.62276056 --> 00:14:03,86.62276056 That's an honor. 111 00:14:03,336.62276056 --> 00:14:06,26.62176056 That's what being a friend means. 112 00:14:06,793.66447434 --> 00:14:14,173.66447434 And so you're robbing people of that opportunity to be that source of love and comfort for you. 113 00:14:14,929.23929341 --> 00:14:29,599.23929341 now I want to go into the second point, which is talking about the difference between isolation and solitude, because I want you to know that it's not always a negative thing to be alone, okay? We need our alone time, right? It's healthy, it's healthy to have that. 114 00:14:29,919.23929341 --> 00:14:37,159.23929341 In fact, Jesus withdrew many times to be alone with the Father, to rest, to recharge, and to just be. 115 00:14:37,834.23929341 --> 00:14:45,835.8061632 Sometimes it was to get vision from him, to get a word from him, to just sit and, and be with him. 116 00:14:46,634.83704207 --> 00:14:49,594.83604207 And so this is necessary for you to do as well. 117 00:14:49,844.83704207 --> 00:14:56,654.83604207 So I want to share the difference between the two so you know what's healthy isolation and what's unhealthy isolation. 118 00:14:57,169.04217655 --> 00:15:01,339.04217655 Unhealthy isolation is if you find yourself sitting alone. 119 00:15:01,664.04317655 --> 00:15:05,864.04317655 Feeling depressed, anxious, or dwelling on negative thoughts. 120 00:15:06,334.04317655 --> 00:15:10,684.04317655 If you withdraw from friends who reach out to you, that are checking on you. 121 00:15:11,114.04317655 --> 00:15:14,484.04317655 If you find yourself stuck in consumption mode. 122 00:15:14,794.04217655 --> 00:15:21,534.04317655 Doom scrolling on social media, uh, comparing yourself, eating away your feelings. 123 00:15:21,974.04317655 --> 00:15:33,404.04267655 Consuming just lots of TV or moving into a super hyper overachieving work mode to combat being alone with your thoughts. 124 00:15:33,404.04267655 --> 00:15:38,759.38325712 Like you are doing anything that you can to, avoid sitting alone with your thoughts. 125 00:15:39,299.38325712 --> 00:15:47,59.38325712 Okay? You are putting yourself in a super busy mode or a super lazy sloth mode. 126 00:15:47,819.38225712 --> 00:15:51,639.38325712 And this is What I believe is unhealthy isolation. 127 00:15:52,159.38325712 --> 00:15:55,989.38325712 When you are avoiding the pain with other things, to put it simply. 128 00:15:56,316.87659046 --> 00:16:23,714.3700449 Now On the opposite side what a healthy alone time and isolation Or which I honestly would call it solitude versus isolation Because this is it's a necessary solitude is necessary for us And what solitude looks like is a time of of reflection Reflection on the situation, what you learn from it, what you gain from it. 129 00:16:24,74.3700449 --> 00:16:27,944.3700449 Feeling the feelings of grief because we're not robots. 130 00:16:27,944.3700449 --> 00:16:30,244.3700449 Like, it's okay to feel the feelings. 131 00:16:30,594.3690449 --> 00:16:35,514.3700449 The feelings of heartache, the feelings of pain, hurt, whatever it is that you're feeling. 132 00:16:36,134.3690449 --> 00:16:38,364.3700449 But not letting it consume you. 133 00:16:38,907.29474553 --> 00:16:40,857.2947455 Not letting it consume your mind. 134 00:16:41,232.4166757 --> 00:16:42,382.4166757 Or consume your joy. 135 00:16:42,392.4166757 --> 00:16:42,422.4166757 Okay. 136 00:16:42,860.945598 --> 00:16:52,640.945598 You are, when you're in this solitude, you're inviting God into those, these moments to heal those parts of you and to give you this clarity and direction. 137 00:16:52,660.945598 --> 00:17:06,696.0875607 As you move forward, you don't shut people out, but you create boundaries that you feel like you need to be able to hear from God and be in tune with what your soul is telling you that you need. 138 00:17:07,376.0875607 --> 00:17:20,661.0770214 So I know for some of us, we could Put ourselves in groups to avoid again just being alone, but maybe we aren't um, Like actually developing deep relationships. 139 00:17:20,661.0780214 --> 00:17:23,321.0770214 We're just around people so we don't have to be alone. 140 00:17:23,331.0770214 --> 00:17:38,383.769887 Like that is definitely something That we can tend to do especially more of like the people people people so Solitude is really important for you the healthy alone time is a time for you to reflect and look inward. 141 00:17:38,763.770887 --> 00:17:48,60.244917 So that way you can, heal, understand what it is that you need, understand your next steps, and to continue to move forward. 142 00:17:48,453.6924549 --> 00:17:49,673.6934549 Right? It's a progression. 143 00:17:49,693.6924549 --> 00:17:54,479.1705556 It's recognizing where you are, not being judgmental, and moving forward at the same time. 144 00:17:54,731.3112869 --> 00:18:11,357.1481923 Versus the unhealthy side is you're over consuming you're being avoidant ignoring Something suppressing this is in the unhealthy side of the scale So, now, the third point I want us to talk about, why God wants you in God centered community to heal. 145 00:18:11,643.8990074 --> 00:18:18,425.5857733 And I want, I want to, I want to like break this down, because even if you have one godly friend, you're winning. 146 00:18:19,45.5857733 --> 00:18:21,85.5857733 Okay, that is community, man. 147 00:18:21,375.5857733 --> 00:18:22,495.5857733 One godly friend. 148 00:18:22,914.421938 --> 00:18:31,574.421938 And it could also be a group of godly community who you may not be super close to, but you know they love God, and they would pray with you. 149 00:18:31,744.421938 --> 00:18:33,934.420938 They would listen without judgment. 150 00:18:34,518.2172355 --> 00:18:56,838.2172355 So you either have one friend who can be this for you or you have a group of women or group of people who can play that part for you, right? And it's on your side to start opening up and being more vulnerable and inviting people into like your true life, right? Your true feelings because this is where that connection forms. 151 00:18:57,338.2172355 --> 00:19:19,111.2134747 So I want to bring us to scripture because this is a truth James five 16 tells us, therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed, the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. 152 00:19:19,466.6704388 --> 00:19:51,212.8550659 So why would we, if we know that? When we are praying for one another when you we are around people who will pray over us Who we can tell and confess to it's either sins a private sin Um or something that you're struggling with like this this practice of confession and sharing Is so powerful the the effect of this is for your healing to take place The prayer we Underestimate the power of prayer man. 153 00:19:51,212.8550659 --> 00:19:52,792.8550659 So join the prayer challenge. 154 00:19:52,812.8550659 --> 00:20:11,911.1633576 This is your sign God is telling us that healing comes when we confess with our mouth and receive with prayer Not the other side, not isolating yourself from people and, and wanting to hide, but bringing things to light, being open, being transparent, being real with people who love God. 155 00:20:12,81.1633576 --> 00:20:13,921.1633576 Again, this is their joy. 156 00:20:14,211.1633576 --> 00:20:15,131.1633576 This is their purpose. 157 00:20:15,131.2633576 --> 00:20:23,977.1317908 This is why they show up to church, why they show up to groups to help heal the broken hearted and to be a friend to those who need one. 158 00:20:24,251.7458048 --> 00:20:25,1.7458048 this is. 159 00:20:26,127.7096389 --> 00:20:27,537.7096389 a believer's purpose. 160 00:20:27,819.5496797 --> 00:20:40,214.2377129 So how you can start to do this, how can you take your first step I'm, not sure where you are in your walk right now, but I would say the first step is going to church, physically going to a local church. 161 00:20:40,274.2377129 --> 00:21:00,500.8922189 So that way you can be in the body of Christ, even if you don't talk to anybody your first first time, I would challenge you to go when they do the altar call and receive prayer It shocked me how many people that actually have never done that before in different small groups that I was in I love going to get prayer man. 162 00:21:00,520.8922189 --> 00:21:05,630.8932189 Like yes pray for me I need someone to come into agreement with me. 163 00:21:06,100.8932189 --> 00:21:07,370.8932189 That's a gift. 164 00:21:07,680.8932189 --> 00:21:15,616.8596364 So Go to a local church You Go receive prayer from someone and then get involved in a small group. 165 00:21:16,66.8596364 --> 00:21:20,16.8596364 Small groups changed my walk with Christ. 166 00:21:20,289.7502614 --> 00:21:21,469.7492614 They were so healing. 167 00:21:21,469.7502614 --> 00:21:22,719.7502614 They were so fun. 168 00:21:22,949.7502614 --> 00:21:26,276.4050909 They made church feel like a home, made it feel smaller. 169 00:21:26,451.6597728 --> 00:21:28,31.6617728 And this is the best way to make friends. 170 00:21:28,291.6597728 --> 00:21:53,900.1962133 Like some of my greatest friends have come through small groups and through signing up to serve Because you're around people who, like, like minded people, people who want to grow, people who want to, you know, fulfill their purpose and their call in the body of Christ, now disclaimer, not everybody's perfect, right? People have their struggles and their battles, but this is what makes us greater together in community and in unity. 171 00:21:54,177.6999828 --> 00:22:06,917.6999828 So don't let one, um, bad experience from a past church deter you from getting involved again and getting plugged in to find that community that your heart is screaming for. 172 00:22:07,335.520478 --> 00:22:13,605.519478 And, in addition to that, there's a bunch of different Christian communities online that you can be a part of. 173 00:22:13,691.4453811 --> 00:22:21,71.4453811 Some of my best friends I have yet to meet in person because I've met them through an online community. 174 00:22:21,333.6446725 --> 00:22:28,480.5698497 And, I mean, your first option, join our free new community that we're creating, for the prayer challenge. 175 00:22:28,734.2896319 --> 00:22:32,695.0711134 January 6 to the 10th you can sign up at wop. 176 00:22:33,175.0711134 --> 00:22:35,835.0711134 com forward slash the healing circle. 177 00:22:36,85.0711134 --> 00:22:38,845.0701134 That's wop w h o p. 178 00:22:39,265.0711134 --> 00:22:41,595.0711134 com slash the healing circle. 179 00:22:41,763.1647735 --> 00:22:53,391.2911744 Come in make a post introduce yourself So that way you practice putting yourself out there and you will find, I promise you, the connections that you're meant to find. 180 00:22:53,741.486675 --> 00:22:55,341.486675 So I pray this episode bless you. 181 00:22:55,371.485675 --> 00:23:03,341.486675 I can't wait to do this prayer challenge with you And I can't wait to hear about the new friendships and sisterhood that you start to cultivate in your life. 182 00:23:03,523.2944888 --> 00:23:04,603.2944888 I love you so much. 183 00:23:04,613.2944888 --> 00:23:05,613.2944888 I'll see you back here. 184 00:23:05,613.2944888 --> 00:23:07,833.2944888 Same time, same place next week. 185 00:23:07,881.023829 --> 00:23:11,385.9974734 And go out and have the best week because you can. 186 00:23:11,774.6109718 --> 00:23:12,664.6109718 Hey, beautiful. 187 00:23:12,704.6109718 --> 00:23:16,274.6109718 I hope you loved hanging with me today and enjoyed the episode. 188 00:23:16,574.6109718 --> 00:23:30,704.6109718 If so, would you take just 30 seconds and share it with someone you love who may also want to heal from past relationships and love themselves again? Also, please scroll down and leave a quick written review for the show on Apple podcasts. 189 00:23:30,704.6109718 --> 00:23:36,104.6109718 This is the main way we can get this message out to our girlfriends all around the world. 190 00:23:36,379.6109718 --> 00:23:41,759.6109718 And it also just really blesses me to know and hear how this podcast is helping you. 191 00:23:41,829.6109718 --> 00:23:42,249.6109718 Okay. 192 00:23:42,349.6109718 --> 00:23:44,919.6109718 I need to get out of my sleds and get ready for date night. 193 00:23:45,79.6109718 --> 00:23:51,49.6109718 I'll meet you back here on Monday for another episode, sending you all the love until next time.
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