May 12, 2025 • 36 mins
Hi beautiful! ♥️
Have you ever felt like you're trying to hurry up and “be healed already”? Like you're rushing through your pain just so you can be okay again—for your relationship, your work, your life? That was me… until Brazil.
In today’s episode, I’m sharing what God showed me when I tried to fix myself too fast—and how He stopped me right in the middle of my pain to teach me how to rely on Him for real healing. Sis, healing isn’t linear. It’s holy. And sometimes, the most powerful thing you can do is pause, feel, and let Him hold you.
So if you’ve been feeling pressure to be okay or you’ve been judging yourself for still struggling, this episode is for you. You’re not failing—God is just trying to meet you right where it hurts.
Let’s talk about how to stop rushing your healing and let God lead you through it.
See you on the inside, xo, Dani
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hello.
Beautiful.
Ah, I feel like it has been a hot second since I just, uh, gave you just back on our cozy couch, just you and I podcast episode.
I know the last.
Few trainings have been uploaded through live trainings that I've done with in a group coaching setting.
And I've missed this.
(00:21):
I've missed just being behind the mic and just sharing from, from the heart.
Um, and this is something, this topic today is something that I feel deep in my bones to share.
If you, I don't know if you follow me over on Instagram or anything, but I had.
The privilege and beautiful honor to co-host a retreat, a Christian healing retreat out in Brazil, and it was 20 of US women there.
(00:50):
And the way that God moved, I could just go on and on and on.
It was absolutely incredible.
I am so in awe of the Lord.
I'm so grateful.
I feel like, I mean, I've just been journaling and writing and reflecting and I mean, he is just so faithful.
Um, there were, there were 20 of us.
(01:11):
That went out there and the Lord, um, told the other co-host, which was a past, uh, client of mine and a really amazing friend that I love dearly, who invited me out to co-host, um, with her.
And yeah, the Lord gave her the topic of healing for this retreat.
(01:31):
And the way that God delivered really, I mean, wholeheartedly exceeded all of our expectations.
And the, the amazing thing about God is that I wasn't even expecting to like, receive any sort of like deep healing because I felt like I've, you know, pretty much like worked through everything or most things.
(01:54):
And I didn't have like something very specific that.
I knew, oh yeah, this is the area that I need healing in.
I literally thought I was just going to, to lead and to facilitate.
Um, and God was just gonna show up in those moments, and he definitely did exceed my expectations there.
This was a trip where I literally have, I've, I've never felt the intimacy with Holy Spirit as like ever before as I did on this trip.
(02:25):
There were moments when I was pushed into this moment of leading and facilitating these workshops and around healing and like, I literally felt, felt the whole Holy Spirit light up on the inside of me.
Like a fire, like a flame on the inside of me, my body being totally hot and just like this deep, um, just deep like sensitivity to him and really like.
(02:55):
Being hesitant with my words and very intentional.
And it was like, not me at all.
It was all glory to him, all his doing.
And I felt honestly like I was there to, to realize and recognize like my re reliance being more reliant on, on God to lead me, um, in different speaking engagements and in.
(03:18):
Like one-on-one conversations and in different areas of my life.
And I, and that was enough for me.
Like I was like, wow, I have my breakthrough.
This is it.
But, but God, he had so much more planned for me and it wasn't anything that I could stop.
Even though I wanted to stop it, and I'm gonna kind of get into this in a little bit, but even, even when I wanted to stop what God was doing, because I didn't wanna feel the uncomfort AKA, the wounds that I didn't know that were still so fresh in anew, I mean.
(03:52):
He dealt with me and he dealt with me in such a way that was so gentle and healing and wholesome.
And this is my, this is what this topic is gonna be about today.
My reminder to you to stop rushing your healing process.
I know that especially if you are a high performing, high achieving woman, you wanna look forward, you wanna, you want things to just click into place.
(04:17):
ASAP.
You wanna get back to normal.
You wanna get good.
As fast as you can, but.
What God taught me through this experience was that we cannot, I mean, we can, we can rush the process and we can rush to this finish line or to what we think in our mind is this healed version of ourselves or to doing the action.
(04:40):
What if I wanna pose this question, what if God just wants you to sit in the pain just a, just, just a little bit longer to sit with, with your woundedness, with him right next to you? Because what if it's in those moments where you experience the scripture? Of Psalms 34 18, the Lord is close to the broken heart and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
(05:07):
What if it's in those moments where you actually feel God the closest to you? And that's what this life.
Here on Earth is about to experience the tangible presence of the Lord.
And that's just something that, I mean, there's so much in this that I wanna share, but this is what I'm gonna be talking to you about today.
(05:28):
Like we wanna fix it, we wanna pray it away.
We wanna push through the pain already and just like be okay and get to this destination point.
But I'm gonna share this deep revelation that I had during this trip about how God stopped me.
Mid healing to remind me that I'm not the one who heals myself, right? I can do all the things outta my own power or tools, how to handle my triggers, whatever, whatever.
(05:53):
But he is healer.
I am not healer.
He is healer.
And so today I really want to pose this idea that we pause in the pain.
And give you this permission to stop rushing through the, the motions and, and emotions and experiences.
(06:17):
Even the har, the hard ones that life gives us.
Sit with God in, in the uncomfortability, in the discomfort, in the pain.
And let him do what only he can do.
When we try to rush past to, to get to a certain place, we can just miss the miracle that he has for us, right in that messy middle.
(06:42):
And so if this is landing, if this is a message you need to hear, lock in Sister, we're gonna, we're gonna chat.
We're gonna have our little couch coffee chat for sure today. 66 00:06:51,873.21150771 --> 00:06:53,73.21150771 Hey, beautiful. 67 00:06:53,193.21150771 --> 00:06:56,973.21150771 Welcome to the Heal From Toxic Relationships podcast. 68 00:06:57,33.21150771 --> 00:07:21,333.21150771 Are you ready to break free from toxic relationship patterns and fully embrace a life filled with confidence, joy, and purpose? Do you find yourself questioning yourself worth and wondering what God's plan for your life is? Or maybe you deeply fear being alone and struggle with the lack of boundaries? Due to your people pleasing tendencies, well sis, you're not alone. 69 00:07:21,363.21150771 --> 00:07:22,503.21150771 I've been there too. 70 00:07:22,623.21150771 --> 00:07:29,853.21150771 Hey, I'm Danny, a Christian life coach wife, recovering people pleaser, and a total girl's girl. 71 00:07:29,943.21150771 --> 00:07:46,653.21150771 For 10 years I was stuck in a cycle of toxic, non-committed relationships and searching for my worth in men, my accomplishments, and the praise of other people until I found out how to heal my past emotional wounds with Christ at the center. 72 00:07:46,813.21150771 --> 00:08:01,933.21150771 In this podcast, you will find faith-based healing tools, confidence building tips, and healthy relationship skills so that you become a God-fearing, confident woman who attracts your husband while walking in your purpose with God. 73 00:08:02,173.21150771 --> 00:08:05,143.21150771 Grab your favorite mocktail and pop in the AirPods. 74 00:08:05,233.21150771 --> 00:08:09,373.21150771 It's time to overshare and overcome these obstacles together. 75 00:08:09,493.21150771 --> 00:08:11,263.21150771 One step at a time. 76 00:08:11,548.04335827 --> 00:08:25,738.04335827 If you didn't know, I have a free community where my podcast listeners can gather, hang out, and connect with other listeners who are also on a similar journey as them when it comes to their faith and also their healing process. 77 00:08:26,98.04335827 --> 00:08:37,498.04335827 And the reason why I created this free community was just for you guys to connect with one another because I believe the enemy wants us in isolation and to feel like we're alone in our struggle. 78 00:08:37,858.04335827 --> 00:08:40,168.04335827 Um, yet God's word combats that. 79 00:08:40,898.04335827 --> 00:08:48,908.04335827 Literally in James five 16, it tells us, therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another so that you may be healed. 80 00:08:49,88.04335827 --> 00:08:52,538.04335827 The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much. 81 00:08:52,598.04335827 --> 00:09:01,58.04335827 And so again, if you don't have anybody to confide in to, to chat with or any type of community, let this be your first step. 82 00:09:01,58.04335827 --> 00:09:10,735.99721547 You never know who you can connect with and, just like find in terms of a new sister or friend, or even if you have a question that you want answered, you can always drop it in there. 83 00:09:10,735.99721547 --> 00:09:18,805.99721547 And I'm in there chatting with you ladies as well, so you can join if you would like, uh, wp.com/the 84 00:09:18,805.99721547 --> 00:09:24,415.99721547 healing circle, that's WP WHO p.com/the 85 00:09:24,415.99721547 --> 00:09:25,195.99721547 healing circle. 86 00:09:25,348.02055228 --> 00:09:30,868.02055228 Okay, now let's get back to the story of what actually happened in Brazil because the way God met me. 87 00:09:31,81.90797692 --> 00:09:38,71.90797692 When I leased, expected him to show up in this way was something that like. 88 00:09:38,761.90797692 --> 00:09:44,461.90797692 I've, it's something that I'm so grateful for and only he could make happen. 89 00:09:44,851.90797692 --> 00:10:00,961.90797692 Making a long story short, we were back in the, our hotel room, me and the, my friend, the woman that I was co-hosting with, and she had finished getting writing and she had walked out of the of the room to go shopping and to grab. 90 00:10:01,216.90797692 --> 00:10:12,376.90797692 A spot for us for dinner while I was finishing getting ready and she popped her head back in and she said, Danielle, you're, I just wanted to tell you that you're stunning. 91 00:10:12,676.90797692 --> 00:10:14,506.90797692 And Jamar is a very lucky man. 92 00:10:15,256.90797692 --> 00:10:18,706.90797692 Literally just that one sentence. 93 00:10:19,546.90797692 --> 00:10:29,806.90797692 That it, it, I automatically felt myself holding back tears and it sounds so crazy 'cause I'm like, why am I about to cry right now? Like in my head? And she's like, she just walked out. 94 00:10:29,806.90797692 --> 00:10:39,76.90797692 And so I'm in the room by myself and I am just doing my makeup and I am, I feel myself trying to hold back these tears and I just couldn't hold 'em back. 95 00:10:39,76.90797692 --> 00:10:39,856.90797692 I start. 96 00:10:40,106.90797692 --> 00:10:54,746.90797692 Bawling and God is so gentle and so sweet and kind because I just felt him like with me in that moment, and these thoughts were just coming to my mind. 97 00:10:54,746.90797692 --> 00:11:04,796.90797692 I, I remembered whenever I was 10 years old in the dressing room with my mom and I started breaking down crying because I was looking in the mirror Ang clothes, and I thought I was ugly. 98 00:11:05,101.90797692 --> 00:11:08,851.90797692 Like I had this deep belief that I was ugly, like having a breakdown at 10. 99 00:11:08,881.90797692 --> 00:11:12,721.90797692 My mom had to call my dad and like my dad had to tell me, speak that life into me. 100 00:11:12,901.90797692 --> 00:11:19,51.90797692 And so, I mean, I had battled with this like throughout adolescence because my half my. 101 00:11:20,41.90797692 --> 00:11:27,751.90797692 My family's Asian and I mean, I'm half white and I was always the bigger, the bigger sister, the bigger cousin out of everybody. 102 00:11:28,51.90797692 --> 00:11:35,641.90797692 And my family would always call me fat, um, and Vietnamese mop and, you know, it would be their, their way. 103 00:11:35,641.90797692 --> 00:11:39,691.90797692 Like, that's just like what they would do. 104 00:11:40,51.90797692 --> 00:11:43,981.90797692 Um, they will call out if you're skinny, they're gonna call out if you're fat. 105 00:11:44,341.90797692 --> 00:11:46,891.90797692 And I just like, did not ever feel. 106 00:11:47,521.90797692 --> 00:11:52,891.90797692 Like beautiful, um, like fast forward now, I'm 28 years old. 107 00:11:53,281.90797692 --> 00:12:07,526.90797692 Um, I see my beauty, there was just something that happened that I don't feel, um, at peace with or ready to share completely publicly yet, but there was something that happened. 108 00:12:08,536.90797692 --> 00:12:11,506.90797692 That took a huge toll on my confidence. 109 00:12:11,746.90797692 --> 00:12:22,816.90797692 Like totally broke me down and it was just, and I, I thought that it was, that happened like a couple months ago and I was just really wanting to move past it, work towards it. 110 00:12:22,816.90797692 --> 00:12:32,56.90797692 I mean, I've, I've worked on and like had a rebuild confidence and increase your confidence and your self-worth for many years now. 111 00:12:32,641.90797692 --> 00:12:37,111.90797692 And in that moment it just all came crumbling down. 112 00:12:37,531.90797692 --> 00:12:39,871.90797692 Um, and all I had was God to lean on. 113 00:12:39,961.90797692 --> 00:12:51,811.90797692 And I just, over the next like 24, 48 hours, God was just really sharing with me and teaching me in this, in, in this moment of this hurt, being exposed. 114 00:12:51,811.90797692 --> 00:13:01,51.90797692 So back to this moment, this moment where I realized, wow, what I thought that I had healed from and moved on from right? Like being in a good place now, like mentally. 115 00:13:02,11.90797692 --> 00:13:18,931.90797692 He brought, he brought it up to me that I was still wounded from it and that it was okay to be in that spot to not be totally, completely healed, but he was so faithful to reveal to me what. 116 00:13:19,336.90797692 --> 00:13:31,486.90797692 Like my subconscious thoughts, like the little girl in me that that needed to be loved, to be brought out and to be loved, and he was loving me in that moment and he was just sharing with me over the course of those next 48 hours. 117 00:13:31,486.90797692 --> 00:13:39,586.90797692 Just that life is going to tear you down and your life is going to crumble at some points. 118 00:13:39,916.90797692 --> 00:13:43,336.90797692 And you know, we can do things in our own strength. 119 00:13:43,906.90797692 --> 00:13:45,496.90797692 That's what I, I was doing. 120 00:13:45,496.90797692 --> 00:13:49,336.90797692 Like I know how to do things in my own strength and I'm sure we're all good at that. 121 00:13:49,756.90797692 --> 00:14:07,156.90797692 But when life really hits you hard, like all you have is the Lord and he was teaching me like this revelation of Danny, you have built yourself and work so hard to, to work on your confidence and to be a confident woman, but. 122 00:14:07,171.90797692 --> 00:14:11,581.90797692 Uh, life is gonna happen and I'm always there no matter what. 123 00:14:11,581.90797692 --> 00:14:17,791.90797692 And through me, not by your hand, you will be healed, but by my hand, you will be healed. 124 00:14:18,181.90797692 --> 00:14:19,831.90797692 And I, I am your healer. 125 00:14:19,831.90797692 --> 00:14:27,121.90797692 And he was just like really teaching me that this might not be the last time that my confidence takes a huge hit or something like this happens. 126 00:14:27,481.90797692 --> 00:14:35,851.90797692 But although he will be with me in every single moment, and it's these moments that I will forever cherish because. 127 00:14:36,811.90797692 --> 00:14:40,171.90797692 It's just, it's just a sweet moment with the father. 128 00:14:40,711.90797692 --> 00:14:41,221.90797692 Um. 129 00:14:42,46.90797692 --> 00:14:49,456.90797692 And so I share that because I know there's a woman listening that you want to rush your healing process. 130 00:14:49,456.90797692 --> 00:14:56,26.90797692 You want a five step process of, okay, do this first, this second, this third, this worth this fifth, and then you will be healed. 131 00:14:56,176.90797692 --> 00:14:56,836.90797692 Ta-da. 132 00:14:56,866.90797692 --> 00:14:59,716.90797692 Okay, you're at your destination and you can live your best life now. 133 00:14:59,806.90797692 --> 00:15:04,666.90797692 And that's just not like it could happen like that. 134 00:15:04,666.90797692 --> 00:15:09,166.90797692 Like who knows? But that's what I thought for. 135 00:15:09,841.90797692 --> 00:15:28,951.90797692 A, a while, right? And, and when we're thinking in this way, it's like we're putting God in a box or even like our, our healing process, our, our emotions in a box and not taking to account what is going to be triggered or brought up in our, in our present that is stemming from something that was deep within our past. 136 00:15:28,951.90797692 --> 00:15:38,491.90797692 And so just moving kind of into this first point that I really wanna express is healing. 137 00:15:38,896.90797692 --> 00:15:42,406.90797692 Is not linear and you are not behind. 138 00:15:42,856.90797692 --> 00:15:45,526.90797692 What this moment showed for me, showed me. 139 00:15:45,526.90797692 --> 00:15:51,376.90797692 It wasn't like, oh wow, like I'm back to the very beginning because now here I am, like in sitting in this pain. 140 00:15:51,706.90797692 --> 00:15:56,86.90797692 It was like these tears that were healing me and I was able to just like. 141 00:15:56,281.90797692 --> 00:16:20,161.90797692 Give my younger self compassion, even myself now, compassion for how far I've made it and even kind of like a little giggle at myself, you know, like, you know, you have, you've worked so hard to get to where you are and life being life, things are gonna happen that are out of your control and you have a God that that cares and wants to sit with you in these moments. 142 00:16:20,161.90797692 --> 00:16:20,611.90797692 And so. 143 00:16:21,451.90797692 --> 00:16:25,141.90797692 Again, healing isn't this like three step process with a clear finish line. 144 00:16:25,681.90797692 --> 00:16:27,91.90797692 It is holy ground. 145 00:16:27,91.90797692 --> 00:16:32,431.90797692 It is a place where, where your wounded spirit meets the God who heals. 146 00:16:32,431.90797692 --> 00:16:34,231.90797692 Like that is his name. 147 00:16:34,321.90797692 --> 00:16:38,431.90797692 He is your protector, your provider, your healer, your comforter. 148 00:16:38,791.90797692 --> 00:16:47,371.9079769 And many times we try to rush out of the pain because we're afraid of of, of what we'll feel if we, if we stay in it. 149 00:16:47,821.9079769 --> 00:16:49,651.9079769 But what if. 150 00:16:50,176.9079769 --> 00:17:09,811.9079769 What if the whole purpose of it is to feel it and to invite God into that process with us so we can lean on him in the middle of the pain and develop this intimacy and dependence on him that is going to show up and help us in all other areas of our life. 151 00:17:10,696.9079769 --> 00:17:21,256.9079769 What if it is a what? If it is a holy ground in this messy middle, messy middle space? You know, we live in this productivity driven culture, hustle culture. 152 00:17:21,496.9079769 --> 00:17:24,586.9079769 Like get through, get, go ahead and get through it. 153 00:17:24,796.9079769 --> 00:17:27,676.9079769 You know, don't stay in the pain for too long. 154 00:17:27,886.9079769 --> 00:17:29,536.9079769 And so like when we're hurting. 155 00:17:29,691.9079769 --> 00:17:29,961.9079769 Right. 156 00:17:29,961.9079769 --> 00:17:46,11.9079769 When we're in this, when we're in this place where we're, we are hurting, right? We are wounded, we feel like we have to bounce back so fast so we can get to back to our work or back to, um, a healthy relationship or back to a good state of mind. 157 00:17:46,561.9079769 --> 00:17:55,591.9079769 But rushing your healing robs you of this deeper encounter that God wants to have with you in the middle of the pain. 158 00:17:55,831.9079769 --> 00:17:58,261.9079769 So back to that Psalm 34 18. 159 00:17:58,261.9079769 --> 00:18:04,951.9079769 The Lord's telling us his promise is that he's close to the broken hearted and save those who are crushed in spirit. 160 00:18:05,371.9079769 --> 00:18:07,531.9079769 Let God stop you. 161 00:18:07,576.9079769 --> 00:18:08,746.9079769 Oh right. 162 00:18:08,746.9079769 --> 00:18:10,246.9079769 Take out the hustle. 163 00:18:10,246.9079769 --> 00:18:16,366.9079769 This you have to be a certain way to be successful or to be in a good spot. 164 00:18:16,756.9079769 --> 00:18:25,696.9079769 Like what if it's in these moments, right? Like letting God stop you in the middle, in this middle portion, in this, in this phase of healing. 165 00:18:26,206.9079769 --> 00:18:31,876.9079769 And instead of asking him, okay, God, how do I get out of this? Right? Get me out of this already. 166 00:18:32,446.9079769 --> 00:18:51,511.9079769 Ask him, God, where are you? In this, what is it like? What is it that you're wanting me to feel or experience in this moment? Like, God, I just need you to sit with me and just allow him to sit with you in the moment he wants. 167 00:18:51,511.9079769 --> 00:18:55,921.9079769 He wants to have this encounter with you in the middle of the pain. 168 00:18:55,921.9079769 --> 00:18:59,371.9079769 Let your paws become your altar. 169 00:19:00,781.9079769 --> 00:19:02,521.9079769 Let his presence be. 170 00:19:02,521.9079769 --> 00:19:04,81.9079769 The answer that you're seeking. 171 00:19:04,81.9079769 --> 00:19:18,631.9079769 This healing destination is literally these moments in his presence where we're able to experience the more and love of God that changes our hearts. 172 00:19:19,756.9079769 --> 00:19:27,106.9079769 That is, that is something that like the Lord Deeply taught me is to value this time where I am healing. 173 00:19:27,106.9079769 --> 00:19:28,936.9079769 It's not this destination, it's not a checklist. 174 00:19:28,936.9079769 --> 00:19:30,736.9079769 It's just moments with him. 175 00:19:31,996.9079769 --> 00:19:40,276.9079769 Second point that I really wanna share with you through this is pain is not proof of failure. 176 00:19:40,906.9079769 --> 00:19:43,876.9079769 It is an invitation to intimacy. 177 00:19:44,416.9079769 --> 00:19:52,66.9079769 And I've said this a little bit here, but, but when we're in this, when we're in these painful moments, this is not a sign that, you know. 178 00:19:52,711.9079769 --> 00:19:54,661.9079769 You have, you're totally off course. 179 00:19:54,661.9079769 --> 00:19:56,41.9079769 You know you're going the wrong way. 180 00:19:56,41.9079769 --> 00:19:56,761.9079769 You have failed. 181 00:19:56,761.9079769 --> 00:19:58,141.9079769 That is not it at all. 182 00:19:58,411.9079769 --> 00:20:02,611.9079769 This is an invitation to invite God in and have this moment of intimacy with him. 183 00:20:03,181.9079769 --> 00:20:07,771.9079769 And so having pain, it does not mean that something is wrong with you. 184 00:20:07,771.9079769 --> 00:20:09,631.9079769 It's not a sign of weakness. 185 00:20:10,21.9079769 --> 00:20:12,211.9079769 Vulnerability is the greatest strength. 186 00:20:12,211.9079769 --> 00:20:19,111.9079769 This is something that really hit home for me because me being like, yes, considered a leader on this trip. 187 00:20:19,141.9079769 --> 00:20:34,231.9079769 The women expressed how they did not realize that me and Brianna were gonna be so vulnerable, and that was so inspiring to them, and it allowed them to open up and be vulnerable and experience their breakthrough with God and. 188 00:20:34,456.9079769 --> 00:20:39,856.9079769 In a sisterhood and in community, because God's word says, confess your sins to one another. 189 00:20:40,6.9079769 --> 00:20:41,956.9079769 This is, I believe it's in James. 190 00:20:42,167.4260593 --> 00:20:43,427.4260593 Five, 16. 191 00:20:43,547.4260593 --> 00:20:47,807.4260593 Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another so that you may be healed. 192 00:20:48,17.4260593 --> 00:21:03,927.4260593 The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much, and so this, these, these moments would not have happened if like there wasn't a call to be vulnerable and to share the dark moments and the hurt and the pain. 193 00:21:03,927.4260593 --> 00:21:06,657.4260593 This is how people are able to connect with you. 194 00:21:06,657.4260593 --> 00:21:07,827.4260593 I don't know if you've ever heard. 195 00:21:08,132.4260593 --> 00:21:15,482.4260593 Of people talking about, or maybe you experience this, like if you can't, it's hard for you to connect with somebody who hasn't been through something hard. 196 00:21:16,92.4260593 --> 00:21:19,452.4260593 And hasn't shared and be, and been been vulnerable and shared with you. 197 00:21:19,452.4260593 --> 00:21:23,982.4260593 Their darkest moments like this is, this is the human experience. 198 00:21:23,982.4260593 --> 00:21:26,322.4260593 This is what allows you to connect with one another. 199 00:21:26,532.4260593 --> 00:21:31,812.4260593 And so being vulnerable, not just with other people, but also with God, this is not a sign of weakness. 200 00:21:31,812.4260593 --> 00:21:39,402.4260593 It's a sign of strength and a sign that you want to heal, and this is where God meets us. 201 00:21:39,692.4260593 --> 00:21:44,672.4260593 De most deeply and most often are in these painful moments. 202 00:21:44,972.4260593 --> 00:21:46,292.4260593 You know, we think God. 203 00:21:47,7.4260593 --> 00:22:04,347.4260593 Are, are only in these big moments, these big breakthroughs, you know, the, the ministry starting, the, the people that are coming to the altar that are being healed from diseases, walking up out of wheelchairs, right? But God is in the very small details as well. 204 00:22:04,652.4260593 --> 00:22:18,122.4260593 He's in the mundane, he's in the times where you are opening your Bible in the morning, where you're making your coffee, where you're in prayer, where you're praying in your heart for, for somebody that you just saw on the side of the road, that that experienced a wreck. 205 00:22:18,122.4260593 --> 00:22:22,742.4260593 Like in these little moments in, in a smile on somebody's face. 206 00:22:22,772.4260593 --> 00:22:30,482.4260593 In a, a friend sharing a word of encouragement to you or a scripture to you that really speaks to you like God's in the small details. 207 00:22:30,482.4260593 --> 00:22:38,42.4260593 He does not only show up in our breakthrough moments, he shows up in, in, in, in the pressing, in the breaking. 208 00:22:38,612.4260593 --> 00:22:42,62.4260593 And sometimes this is where he waits for us. 209 00:22:42,392.4260593 --> 00:22:51,272.4260593 So we learn to need him and not just to seek him for outcomes, not to just seek him for the blessing for his hand, but. 210 00:22:51,852.4260593 --> 00:22:53,382.4260593 In his presence. 211 00:22:53,802.4260593 --> 00:23:02,922.4260593 You ever know, like those moments where you just feel like, I remember this one moment in my adult life, like where I just felt like I needed my father. 212 00:23:03,677.4260593 --> 00:23:09,582.4260593 I, I was like crying in Jamar's lab and I just felt like I just really need my dad right now. 213 00:23:10,557.4260593 --> 00:23:15,912.4260593 And, and maybe you feel that way like with a friend, you're like, I just really need my friend, or I just really need my sister in this moment. 214 00:23:16,152.4260593 --> 00:23:34,842.4260593 Like, this is the, this is the posture, this is the place that, that God, that we build this intimacy with the Lord and we were, we, we learned to, to, to need him to be dependent on him and to not to strive and to do things out of our own strength or seek him just for the blessing. 215 00:23:35,547.4260593 --> 00:23:46,197.4260593 So how you do this is really like shifting your perspective, right? So instead of viewing pain as, as proof of failure, shift your perspective. 216 00:23:46,197.4260593 --> 00:23:56,547.4260593 Like, what if this isn't a setback, right? What if, what if, what if what? You went through the pain, the heartbreak, um, the betrayal, the abandonment, the abuse. 217 00:23:56,547.4260593 --> 00:24:15,237.4260593 What if this isn't a setback? But what if it is sacred ground? What if, what if This is a moment where you build a next level intimacy with the Lord Jesus, with God the Father, that where you invite him into these painful moments, and he does. 218 00:24:15,237.4260593 --> 00:24:20,37.4260593 He starts doing this transformation at a core level within your heart. 219 00:24:20,937.4260593 --> 00:24:27,447.4260593 This is where you're crying with him, where you're talking to him, where you're allowing him to minister to that version of you that still feels broken. 220 00:24:27,507.4260593 --> 00:24:30,297.4260593 And I'm telling you right now, like that feels like magic. 221 00:24:30,447.4260593 --> 00:24:31,587.4260593 It feels like a miracle. 222 00:24:31,587.4260593 --> 00:24:33,147.4260593 There's nothing like it. 223 00:24:33,387.4260593 --> 00:24:43,647.4260593 Like you being able to, I mean, right after that, like I was crying like here and there for the next day, and it was just, I was having these little min like moments where God was ministering to my heart. 224 00:24:44,82.4260593 --> 00:24:45,552.4260593 And it was just beautiful. 225 00:24:45,552.4260593 --> 00:24:51,792.4260593 Like if I could go back and live in that moment again, I would, because I just felt so close with the Lord. 226 00:24:53,22.4260593 --> 00:25:07,182.4260593 And he's so cool because you have different close moments, like you feel like you have this fire inside of you by Holy Spirit, where you are, where you were, where you were in this authority and leadership, and then you have these moments where it's soft, where it's like this. 227 00:25:07,872.4260593 --> 00:25:13,242.4260593 This gentleness and this cuddling with the Lord and you just can't put 'em in a box. 228 00:25:13,242.4260593 --> 00:25:16,932.4260593 And I mean, both, both experiences are so beautiful. 229 00:25:17,412.4260593 --> 00:25:29,832.4260593 Um, but to have that latter one, you've got to just be comfortable sitting and, and an opening and saying yes to the invitation to intimacy. 230 00:25:31,332.4260593 --> 00:25:42,162.4260593 Um, two Corinthians 12, nine says, my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. 231 00:25:42,792.4260593 --> 00:25:44,532.4260593 What a beautiful promise. 232 00:25:44,712.4260593 --> 00:25:49,747.4260593 You really do sense his power and this you lean away from you. 233 00:25:49,752.4260593 --> 00:25:53,982.4260593 You have this deeper revelation of like, it is not by my own understanding. 234 00:25:53,982.4260593 --> 00:25:55,962.4260593 I cannot live by my hand. 235 00:25:56,352.4260593 --> 00:26:00,612.4260593 By my own understanding, but it is by God's power alone. 236 00:26:00,732.4260593 --> 00:26:09,672.4260593 And those revelations come when, when you're sitting with him in the middle of the hurt and the heartache. 237 00:26:10,962.4260593 --> 00:26:14,142.4260593 Now the final point that I wanna share here is. 238 00:26:14,682.4260593 --> 00:26:20,862.4260593 Just this idea, I wanna cast this idea down, this idea that you have to get back up on your own. 239 00:26:21,282.4260593 --> 00:26:24,402.4260593 Truth is you do not have to get back up on your own. 240 00:26:24,402.4260593 --> 00:26:33,972.4260593 And if you do get back up on your own, like kind of what I, and I, I didn't, I wouldn't even consider it getting back up on my own because I did, I needed God in that moment. 241 00:26:33,972.4260593 --> 00:26:37,122.4260593 And this was where I cried out to the Lord like a couple months ago. 242 00:26:37,452.4260593 --> 00:26:38,112.4260593 But it was like. 243 00:26:38,582.4260593 --> 00:26:39,62.4260593 Okay. 244 00:26:39,92.4260593 --> 00:26:42,692.4260593 Like, I resolved this with, with this other person and now I'm good. 245 00:26:42,992.4260593 --> 00:26:45,62.4260593 And it's kind of like moved past it. 246 00:26:45,62.4260593 --> 00:26:48,662.4260593 I didn't sit and and process with the Lord. 247 00:26:48,662.4260593 --> 00:26:56,492.4260593 And so you this idea that like, I, I just wanna hone in on this idea that you do not have to get back up on your own. 248 00:26:56,972.4260593 --> 00:27:03,272.4260593 We tend to wear ourselves out trying to get back to who we were before we went through the pain. 249 00:27:04,122.4260593 --> 00:27:17,712.4260593 But the, the truth of the matter is that that will wear you out and God isn't trying to get you back to who you were before you experienced the pain He's trying to bring, bring in a new and fresh, um. 250 00:27:18,572.4260593 --> 00:27:20,642.4260593 Character of you. 251 00:27:20,702.4260593 --> 00:27:22,952.4260593 He's trying to bring you forward. 252 00:27:23,42.4260593 --> 00:27:27,932.4260593 He's trying to bring you forward in healing and wholeness in him. 253 00:27:28,172.4260593 --> 00:27:30,422.4260593 That comes out of the breaking and pressing. 254 00:27:30,422.4260593 --> 00:27:40,382.4260593 So you're not gonna go back to who you were before, but you're going to be, um, a new type of creation that has come out of this valley. 255 00:27:40,862.4260593 --> 00:27:46,652.4260593 And it's just like a beautiful refining process that's constant throughout your entire life here on earth. 256 00:27:47,667.4260593 --> 00:28:15,837.4260593 And the reason why this is so important is because if you have, if you always have to hold yourself up, and I feel like a lot of women are finding themselves here, like they have all this pressure, whether it's your single mom or your provider for, for your parents now in, in your twenties or thirties or you're, you have this pressure, right, to be provider and to, to get over things and to get back to it. 257 00:28:16,857.4260593 --> 00:28:39,387.4260593 You know, it can cause, it can cause this, um, this like friction with the soft and feminine parts of you, right? You know, if you feel like you have to always be the one to hold you up, you're always going to feel afraid to fall because if you fall. 258 00:28:39,897.4260593 --> 00:28:42,417.4260593 Then everybody else is gonna be affected from it. 259 00:28:42,717.4260593 --> 00:28:46,167.4260593 But the truth is, when you let God hold you. 260 00:28:46,947.4260593 --> 00:28:48,987.4260593 That's where you're gonna find rest. 261 00:28:49,257.4260593 --> 00:28:53,607.4260593 You're gonna find renewal, and you're gonna find a different kind of strength. 262 00:28:53,637.4260593 --> 00:29:04,257.4260593 This like quiet yet, yet, like I'm, I'm still in awe and still like uncovering and, and processing how I'm feeling now. 263 00:29:04,587.4260593 --> 00:29:13,587.4260593 Um, but this, like, this calm and and confident strength that you have truly rooted in the Lord and not in your own power. 264 00:29:14,277.4260593 --> 00:29:15,447.4260593 It's a difference. 265 00:29:15,867.4260593 --> 00:29:29,397.4260593 And so how you start to move into this and shift, right, and, and, and letting God hold you and not getting back up on your own is instead of rushing ahead like I've been, I've kept on telling like, Jamar. 266 00:29:30,57.4260593 --> 00:29:34,77.4260593 Like, I just feel like I'm not in a state of rushing like I was before this trip. 267 00:29:34,377.4260593 --> 00:29:39,687.4260593 I'm not about the hustle, the rush, the chaos, um, the back to back stuff. 268 00:29:40,17.4260593 --> 00:29:47,817.4260593 Like I wanna create space and I just feel so at peace and aligned, um, with this like calm state. 269 00:29:48,207.4260593 --> 00:29:54,177.4260593 And so instead of rushing ahead, make the shift to rest in the truth. 270 00:29:54,867.4260593 --> 00:29:57,327.4260593 And that truth is that you are still. 271 00:29:57,642.4260593 --> 00:30:02,232.4260593 Loved, and you are still chosen and you are still being held. 272 00:30:02,292.4260593 --> 00:30:06,402.4260593 No matter what your age is, you're still a child of the Lord's. 273 00:30:06,402.4260593 --> 00:30:12,462.4260593 You're still his daughter that has these wounds that he's going to reveal to you. 274 00:30:12,512.4260593 --> 00:30:19,142.4260593 As long as you invite him in to those areas and he's gonna continue to mold you as that clay. 275 00:30:19,142.4260593 --> 00:30:28,82.4260593 He's the potter to mold you into the woman who is an overcomer with God as her strength and not her being her own strength. 276 00:30:28,442.4260593 --> 00:30:37,592.4260593 Because you can only get so far if you are trying to do things in your own strength and God wants to, wants to make you fly on the wings of the Eagles. 277 00:30:38,112.4260593 --> 00:30:48,162.4260593 And that's by letting him hold you and not you constantly in this state of getting back up on your own, you don't have to do more to be okay. 278 00:30:48,162.4260593 --> 00:30:53,862.4260593 You don't have to fill your schedule and, and be in this constant state of busyness to be okay. 279 00:30:54,192.4260593 --> 00:30:59,742.4260593 You literally, God's word says, and I've read this while I was on the plane in Ephesians. 280 00:30:59,742.4260593 --> 00:31:00,822.4260593 It was either Ephesians. 281 00:31:00,837.4260593 --> 00:31:04,297.4260593 I believe it was Ephesians two, let me just pull it up. 282 00:31:04,703.0069913 --> 00:31:04,913.0069913 Okay. 283 00:31:04,913.0069913 --> 00:31:05,873.0069913 Yes, I was correct. 284 00:31:05,873.0069913 --> 00:31:19,853.0069913 So Ephesians two 10, it says, for we are his workmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, so that we would walk in them. 285 00:31:20,213.0069913 --> 00:31:21,263.0069913 Interesting. 286 00:31:21,293.0069913 --> 00:31:24,353.0069913 The word walk stood out to me this time. 287 00:31:24,353.0069913 --> 00:31:25,583.0069913 It's not work. 288 00:31:25,853.0069913 --> 00:31:30,173.0069913 Work, so you can move into them, but to walk in them. 289 00:31:30,413.0069913 --> 00:31:43,793.0069913 And so this idea of not striving, but receiving what God has for you, not, um, trying to do things in our own strength, but resting in his promises, right? God already prepared. 290 00:31:44,663.0069913 --> 00:31:53,453.0069913 Our, our works and prepared are what he has us to do beforehand, so that we could just walk in it. 291 00:31:53,663.0069913 --> 00:31:55,73.0069913 It is an invitation. 292 00:31:55,73.0069913 --> 00:32:01,253.0069913 It's not an invitation to work or to strive towards it, but it's an invitation to walk in them. 293 00:32:01,318.0069913 --> 00:32:04,738.0069913 It already being called, already having the work prepared. 294 00:32:04,798.0069913 --> 00:32:13,948.0069913 And so of course it's not to like not to work, but this idea that you have to make things happen on your own is not biblical. 295 00:32:13,948.0069913 --> 00:32:16,408.0069913 It's not, it's not what God has for us to do. 296 00:32:16,408.0069913 --> 00:32:28,288.0069913 It's his promises and he's designed them so we can rest in them and walk into them, which just was so beautiful in this all like. 297 00:32:28,853.0069913 --> 00:32:29,633.0069913 He's so intentional. 298 00:32:29,633.0069913 --> 00:32:33,203.0069913 It all tied together into what he was revealing to me in this trip. 299 00:32:33,473.0069913 --> 00:32:47,633.0069913 Um, but yeah, it like resting in his truth, not, not rushing to the next thing, not having to do more, but just staying with him with the one who makes you whole and healed and fruitful. 300 00:32:47,633.0069913 --> 00:32:49,343.0069913 He is the answer. 301 00:32:49,343.0069913 --> 00:32:52,373.0069913 It's by his hand alone, not yours. 302 00:32:52,673.0069913 --> 00:32:53,483.0069913 And so. 303 00:32:53,903.0069913 --> 00:32:59,633.0069913 You know, I, I, I could go on and on, but I will wrap up the episode here. 304 00:32:59,633.0069913 --> 00:33:20,603.0069913 You know, I hope I pray that this episode gave you permission to just pause in the messy middle, permission to just breathe, to slow down, to let God heal you where it hurts, to invite him in, to expose the parts of you, the wounded spirit within you that maybe you've rushed past and you haven't given any attention to. 305 00:33:21,143.0069913 --> 00:33:21,623.0069913 And. 306 00:33:21,668.0069913 --> 00:33:21,728.0069913 Yeah. 307 00:33:22,238.0069913 --> 00:33:34,988.0069913 Not just where it's, you know, convenient for you to invite him in, but to really allow him to do that deep work in your heart, because those areas that he's not invited into, those are the things that are gonna be holding you back for years to come. 308 00:33:35,348.0069913 --> 00:33:44,843.0069913 And so why not invite him into those areas today? And continually do that as you, he's taking you on this refining process. 309 00:33:45,173.0069913 --> 00:33:49,943.0069913 So those three truths, again, one, healing is not linear. 310 00:33:50,303.0069913 --> 00:33:52,643.0069913 Two, pain is not failure. 311 00:33:52,673.0069913 --> 00:33:56,453.0069913 It's an invitation to go deeper in intimacy with Jesus. 312 00:33:56,573.0069913 --> 00:34:01,133.0069913 And three, you do not have to rise and get back up on your own. 313 00:34:01,433.0069913 --> 00:34:04,943.0069913 He is always there to hold you to be that good Father. 314 00:34:05,623.0069913 --> 00:34:19,183.0069913 If you are wanting some next level of community or to share, there is a community that I've created for the podcast listeners, um, and that is the Healing Circle. 315 00:34:19,243.0069913 --> 00:34:22,783.0069913 You can join in the app wp. 316 00:34:23,173.0069913 --> 00:34:27,313.0069913 Um, that is w.com/the 317 00:34:27,313.0069913 --> 00:34:28,3.0069913 healing circle. 318 00:34:28,613.0069913 --> 00:34:32,663.0069913 That's WHO p.com/the 319 00:34:32,663.0069913 --> 00:34:33,773.0069913 Healing Circle. 320 00:34:33,803.0069913 --> 00:34:42,713.0069913 This is where you can come in and get a little level of community and ask questions and share anything that's on your heart from any of the episodes that you listen to. 321 00:34:43,133.0069913 --> 00:34:44,543.0069913 I truly do love you. 322 00:34:44,873.0069913 --> 00:34:46,223.0069913 God loves you even more. 323 00:34:46,223.0069913 --> 00:34:47,663.0069913 He sees you. 324 00:34:48,288.0069913 --> 00:34:51,828.0069913 Every inch and every part of you, and he loves you still. 325 00:34:52,278.0069913 --> 00:34:54,498.0069913 Keep going, keep going at it. 326 00:34:54,498.0069913 --> 00:34:55,338.0069913 Don't rush. 327 00:34:55,848.0069913 --> 00:35:05,448.0069913 Have these special moments where you just take, take a chill pill, take a little a time back, um, in the quiet and in those moments with the Lord. 328 00:35:05,748.0069913 --> 00:35:09,408.0069913 God is not in a hurry when he's healing you, when he's healing your heart. 329 00:35:09,938.0069913 --> 00:35:18,908.0069913 Just trusting in that process is I believe the best thing that you can do for your past, future, and present self. 330 00:35:19,268.0069913 --> 00:35:20,678.0069913 Alright, I'll see you back here. 331 00:35:20,678.0069913 --> 00:35:22,478.0069913 Same place, same time next week. 332 00:35:22,478.0069913 --> 00:35:22,538.0069913 Bye. 333 00:35:23,702.5962514 --> 00:35:24,632.5962514 Hey, beautiful. 334 00:35:24,632.5962514 --> 00:35:28,232.5962514 I hope you loved hanging with me today and enjoyed the episode. 335 00:35:28,502.5962514 --> 00:35:42,902.5962514 If so, would you take just 30 seconds and share it with someone you love who may also want to heal from past relationships and love themselves again? Also, please scroll down and leave a quick written review for the show on Apple Podcasts. 336 00:35:42,992.5962514 --> 00:35:48,62.5962514 This is the main way we can get this message out to our girlfriends all around the world. 337 00:35:48,307.5962514 --> 00:35:53,707.5962514 And it also just really blesses me to know and hear how this podcast is helping you. 338 00:35:53,767.5962514 --> 00:35:56,857.5962514 Okay, I need to get outta my sweats and get ready for date night. 339 00:35:57,7.5962514 --> 00:36:00,67.5962514 I'll meet you back here on Monday for another episode. 340 00:36:00,187.5962514 --> 00:36:01,807.5962514 Sending you all the love. 341 00:36:01,867.5962514 --> 00:36:03,7.5962514 Until next time.
Hello.
Beautiful.
Ah, I feel like it has been a hot second since I just, uh, gave you just back on our cozy couch, just you and I podcast episode.
I know the last.
Few trainings have been uploaded through live trainings that I've done with in a group coaching setting.
And I've missed this.
(00:21):
I've missed just being behind the mic and just sharing from, from the heart.
Um, and this is something, this topic today is something that I feel deep in my bones to share.
If you, I don't know if you follow me over on Instagram or anything, but I had.
The privilege and beautiful honor to co-host a retreat, a Christian healing retreat out in Brazil, and it was 20 of US women there.
(00:50):
And the way that God moved, I could just go on and on and on.
It was absolutely incredible.
I am so in awe of the Lord.
I'm so grateful.
I feel like, I mean, I've just been journaling and writing and reflecting and I mean, he is just so faithful.
Um, there were, there were 20 of us.
(01:11):
That went out there and the Lord, um, told the other co-host, which was a past, uh, client of mine and a really amazing friend that I love dearly, who invited me out to co-host, um, with her.
And yeah, the Lord gave her the topic of healing for this retreat.
(01:31):
And the way that God delivered really, I mean, wholeheartedly exceeded all of our expectations.
And the, the amazing thing about God is that I wasn't even expecting to like, receive any sort of like deep healing because I felt like I've, you know, pretty much like worked through everything or most things.
(01:54):
And I didn't have like something very specific that.
I knew, oh yeah, this is the area that I need healing in.
I literally thought I was just going to, to lead and to facilitate.
Um, and God was just gonna show up in those moments, and he definitely did exceed my expectations there.
This was a trip where I literally have, I've, I've never felt the intimacy with Holy Spirit as like ever before as I did on this trip.
(02:25):
There were moments when I was pushed into this moment of leading and facilitating these workshops and around healing and like, I literally felt, felt the whole Holy Spirit light up on the inside of me.
Like a fire, like a flame on the inside of me, my body being totally hot and just like this deep, um, just deep like sensitivity to him and really like.
(02:55):
Being hesitant with my words and very intentional.
And it was like, not me at all.
It was all glory to him, all his doing.
And I felt honestly like I was there to, to realize and recognize like my re reliance being more reliant on, on God to lead me, um, in different speaking engagements and in.
(03:18):
Like one-on-one conversations and in different areas of my life.
And I, and that was enough for me.
Like I was like, wow, I have my breakthrough.
This is it.
But, but God, he had so much more planned for me and it wasn't anything that I could stop.
Even though I wanted to stop it, and I'm gonna kind of get into this in a little bit, but even, even when I wanted to stop what God was doing, because I didn't wanna feel the uncomfort AKA, the wounds that I didn't know that were still so fresh in anew, I mean.
(03:52):
He dealt with me and he dealt with me in such a way that was so gentle and healing and wholesome.
And this is my, this is what this topic is gonna be about today.
My reminder to you to stop rushing your healing process.
I know that especially if you are a high performing, high achieving woman, you wanna look forward, you wanna, you want things to just click into place.
(04:17):
ASAP.
You wanna get back to normal.
You wanna get good.
As fast as you can, but.
What God taught me through this experience was that we cannot, I mean, we can, we can rush the process and we can rush to this finish line or to what we think in our mind is this healed version of ourselves or to doing the action.
(04:40):
What if I wanna pose this question, what if God just wants you to sit in the pain just a, just, just a little bit longer to sit with, with your woundedness, with him right next to you? Because what if it's in those moments where you experience the scripture? Of Psalms 34 18, the Lord is close to the broken heart and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
(05:07):
What if it's in those moments where you actually feel God the closest to you? And that's what this life.
Here on Earth is about to experience the tangible presence of the Lord.
And that's just something that, I mean, there's so much in this that I wanna share, but this is what I'm gonna be talking to you about today.
(05:28):
Like we wanna fix it, we wanna pray it away.
We wanna push through the pain already and just like be okay and get to this destination point.
But I'm gonna share this deep revelation that I had during this trip about how God stopped me.
Mid healing to remind me that I'm not the one who heals myself, right? I can do all the things outta my own power or tools, how to handle my triggers, whatever, whatever.
(05:53):
But he is healer.
I am not healer.
He is healer.
And so today I really want to pose this idea that we pause in the pain.
And give you this permission to stop rushing through the, the motions and, and emotions and experiences.
(06:17):
Even the har, the hard ones that life gives us.
Sit with God in, in the uncomfortability, in the discomfort, in the pain.
And let him do what only he can do.
When we try to rush past to, to get to a certain place, we can just miss the miracle that he has for us, right in that messy middle.
(06:42):
And so if this is landing, if this is a message you need to hear, lock in Sister, we're gonna, we're gonna chat.
We're gonna have our little couch coffee chat for sure today. 66 00:06:51,873.21150771 --> 00:06:53,73.21150771 Hey, beautiful. 67 00:06:53,193.21150771 --> 00:06:56,973.21150771 Welcome to the Heal From Toxic Relationships podcast. 68 00:06:57,33.21150771 --> 00:07:21,333.21150771 Are you ready to break free from toxic relationship patterns and fully embrace a life filled with confidence, joy, and purpose? Do you find yourself questioning yourself worth and wondering what God's plan for your life is? Or maybe you deeply fear being alone and struggle with the lack of boundaries? Due to your people pleasing tendencies, well sis, you're not alone. 69 00:07:21,363.21150771 --> 00:07:22,503.21150771 I've been there too. 70 00:07:22,623.21150771 --> 00:07:29,853.21150771 Hey, I'm Danny, a Christian life coach wife, recovering people pleaser, and a total girl's girl. 71 00:07:29,943.21150771 --> 00:07:46,653.21150771 For 10 years I was stuck in a cycle of toxic, non-committed relationships and searching for my worth in men, my accomplishments, and the praise of other people until I found out how to heal my past emotional wounds with Christ at the center. 72 00:07:46,813.21150771 --> 00:08:01,933.21150771 In this podcast, you will find faith-based healing tools, confidence building tips, and healthy relationship skills so that you become a God-fearing, confident woman who attracts your husband while walking in your purpose with God. 73 00:08:02,173.21150771 --> 00:08:05,143.21150771 Grab your favorite mocktail and pop in the AirPods. 74 00:08:05,233.21150771 --> 00:08:09,373.21150771 It's time to overshare and overcome these obstacles together. 75 00:08:09,493.21150771 --> 00:08:11,263.21150771 One step at a time. 76 00:08:11,548.04335827 --> 00:08:25,738.04335827 If you didn't know, I have a free community where my podcast listeners can gather, hang out, and connect with other listeners who are also on a similar journey as them when it comes to their faith and also their healing process. 77 00:08:26,98.04335827 --> 00:08:37,498.04335827 And the reason why I created this free community was just for you guys to connect with one another because I believe the enemy wants us in isolation and to feel like we're alone in our struggle. 78 00:08:37,858.04335827 --> 00:08:40,168.04335827 Um, yet God's word combats that. 79 00:08:40,898.04335827 --> 00:08:48,908.04335827 Literally in James five 16, it tells us, therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another so that you may be healed. 80 00:08:49,88.04335827 --> 00:08:52,538.04335827 The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much. 81 00:08:52,598.04335827 --> 00:09:01,58.04335827 And so again, if you don't have anybody to confide in to, to chat with or any type of community, let this be your first step. 82 00:09:01,58.04335827 --> 00:09:10,735.99721547 You never know who you can connect with and, just like find in terms of a new sister or friend, or even if you have a question that you want answered, you can always drop it in there. 83 00:09:10,735.99721547 --> 00:09:18,805.99721547 And I'm in there chatting with you ladies as well, so you can join if you would like, uh, wp.com/the 84 00:09:18,805.99721547 --> 00:09:24,415.99721547 healing circle, that's WP WHO p.com/the 85 00:09:24,415.99721547 --> 00:09:25,195.99721547 healing circle. 86 00:09:25,348.02055228 --> 00:09:30,868.02055228 Okay, now let's get back to the story of what actually happened in Brazil because the way God met me. 87 00:09:31,81.90797692 --> 00:09:38,71.90797692 When I leased, expected him to show up in this way was something that like. 88 00:09:38,761.90797692 --> 00:09:44,461.90797692 I've, it's something that I'm so grateful for and only he could make happen. 89 00:09:44,851.90797692 --> 00:10:00,961.90797692 Making a long story short, we were back in the, our hotel room, me and the, my friend, the woman that I was co-hosting with, and she had finished getting writing and she had walked out of the of the room to go shopping and to grab. 90 00:10:01,216.90797692 --> 00:10:12,376.90797692 A spot for us for dinner while I was finishing getting ready and she popped her head back in and she said, Danielle, you're, I just wanted to tell you that you're stunning. 91 00:10:12,676.90797692 --> 00:10:14,506.90797692 And Jamar is a very lucky man. 92 00:10:15,256.90797692 --> 00:10:18,706.90797692 Literally just that one sentence. 93 00:10:19,546.90797692 --> 00:10:29,806.90797692 That it, it, I automatically felt myself holding back tears and it sounds so crazy 'cause I'm like, why am I about to cry right now? Like in my head? And she's like, she just walked out. 94 00:10:29,806.90797692 --> 00:10:39,76.90797692 And so I'm in the room by myself and I am just doing my makeup and I am, I feel myself trying to hold back these tears and I just couldn't hold 'em back. 95 00:10:39,76.90797692 --> 00:10:39,856.90797692 I start. 96 00:10:40,106.90797692 --> 00:10:54,746.90797692 Bawling and God is so gentle and so sweet and kind because I just felt him like with me in that moment, and these thoughts were just coming to my mind. 97 00:10:54,746.90797692 --> 00:11:04,796.90797692 I, I remembered whenever I was 10 years old in the dressing room with my mom and I started breaking down crying because I was looking in the mirror Ang clothes, and I thought I was ugly. 98 00:11:05,101.90797692 --> 00:11:08,851.90797692 Like I had this deep belief that I was ugly, like having a breakdown at 10. 99 00:11:08,881.90797692 --> 00:11:12,721.90797692 My mom had to call my dad and like my dad had to tell me, speak that life into me. 100 00:11:12,901.90797692 --> 00:11:19,51.90797692 And so, I mean, I had battled with this like throughout adolescence because my half my. 101 00:11:20,41.90797692 --> 00:11:27,751.90797692 My family's Asian and I mean, I'm half white and I was always the bigger, the bigger sister, the bigger cousin out of everybody. 102 00:11:28,51.90797692 --> 00:11:35,641.90797692 And my family would always call me fat, um, and Vietnamese mop and, you know, it would be their, their way. 103 00:11:35,641.90797692 --> 00:11:39,691.90797692 Like, that's just like what they would do. 104 00:11:40,51.90797692 --> 00:11:43,981.90797692 Um, they will call out if you're skinny, they're gonna call out if you're fat. 105 00:11:44,341.90797692 --> 00:11:46,891.90797692 And I just like, did not ever feel. 106 00:11:47,521.90797692 --> 00:11:52,891.90797692 Like beautiful, um, like fast forward now, I'm 28 years old. 107 00:11:53,281.90797692 --> 00:12:07,526.90797692 Um, I see my beauty, there was just something that happened that I don't feel, um, at peace with or ready to share completely publicly yet, but there was something that happened. 108 00:12:08,536.90797692 --> 00:12:11,506.90797692 That took a huge toll on my confidence. 109 00:12:11,746.90797692 --> 00:12:22,816.90797692 Like totally broke me down and it was just, and I, I thought that it was, that happened like a couple months ago and I was just really wanting to move past it, work towards it. 110 00:12:22,816.90797692 --> 00:12:32,56.90797692 I mean, I've, I've worked on and like had a rebuild confidence and increase your confidence and your self-worth for many years now. 111 00:12:32,641.90797692 --> 00:12:37,111.90797692 And in that moment it just all came crumbling down. 112 00:12:37,531.90797692 --> 00:12:39,871.90797692 Um, and all I had was God to lean on. 113 00:12:39,961.90797692 --> 00:12:51,811.90797692 And I just, over the next like 24, 48 hours, God was just really sharing with me and teaching me in this, in, in this moment of this hurt, being exposed. 114 00:12:51,811.90797692 --> 00:13:01,51.90797692 So back to this moment, this moment where I realized, wow, what I thought that I had healed from and moved on from right? Like being in a good place now, like mentally. 115 00:13:02,11.90797692 --> 00:13:18,931.90797692 He brought, he brought it up to me that I was still wounded from it and that it was okay to be in that spot to not be totally, completely healed, but he was so faithful to reveal to me what. 116 00:13:19,336.90797692 --> 00:13:31,486.90797692 Like my subconscious thoughts, like the little girl in me that that needed to be loved, to be brought out and to be loved, and he was loving me in that moment and he was just sharing with me over the course of those next 48 hours. 117 00:13:31,486.90797692 --> 00:13:39,586.90797692 Just that life is going to tear you down and your life is going to crumble at some points. 118 00:13:39,916.90797692 --> 00:13:43,336.90797692 And you know, we can do things in our own strength. 119 00:13:43,906.90797692 --> 00:13:45,496.90797692 That's what I, I was doing. 120 00:13:45,496.90797692 --> 00:13:49,336.90797692 Like I know how to do things in my own strength and I'm sure we're all good at that. 121 00:13:49,756.90797692 --> 00:14:07,156.90797692 But when life really hits you hard, like all you have is the Lord and he was teaching me like this revelation of Danny, you have built yourself and work so hard to, to work on your confidence and to be a confident woman, but. 122 00:14:07,171.90797692 --> 00:14:11,581.90797692 Uh, life is gonna happen and I'm always there no matter what. 123 00:14:11,581.90797692 --> 00:14:17,791.90797692 And through me, not by your hand, you will be healed, but by my hand, you will be healed. 124 00:14:18,181.90797692 --> 00:14:19,831.90797692 And I, I am your healer. 125 00:14:19,831.90797692 --> 00:14:27,121.90797692 And he was just like really teaching me that this might not be the last time that my confidence takes a huge hit or something like this happens. 126 00:14:27,481.90797692 --> 00:14:35,851.90797692 But although he will be with me in every single moment, and it's these moments that I will forever cherish because. 127 00:14:36,811.90797692 --> 00:14:40,171.90797692 It's just, it's just a sweet moment with the father. 128 00:14:40,711.90797692 --> 00:14:41,221.90797692 Um. 129 00:14:42,46.90797692 --> 00:14:49,456.90797692 And so I share that because I know there's a woman listening that you want to rush your healing process. 130 00:14:49,456.90797692 --> 00:14:56,26.90797692 You want a five step process of, okay, do this first, this second, this third, this worth this fifth, and then you will be healed. 131 00:14:56,176.90797692 --> 00:14:56,836.90797692 Ta-da. 132 00:14:56,866.90797692 --> 00:14:59,716.90797692 Okay, you're at your destination and you can live your best life now. 133 00:14:59,806.90797692 --> 00:15:04,666.90797692 And that's just not like it could happen like that. 134 00:15:04,666.90797692 --> 00:15:09,166.90797692 Like who knows? But that's what I thought for. 135 00:15:09,841.90797692 --> 00:15:28,951.90797692 A, a while, right? And, and when we're thinking in this way, it's like we're putting God in a box or even like our, our healing process, our, our emotions in a box and not taking to account what is going to be triggered or brought up in our, in our present that is stemming from something that was deep within our past. 136 00:15:28,951.90797692 --> 00:15:38,491.90797692 And so just moving kind of into this first point that I really wanna express is healing. 137 00:15:38,896.90797692 --> 00:15:42,406.90797692 Is not linear and you are not behind. 138 00:15:42,856.90797692 --> 00:15:45,526.90797692 What this moment showed for me, showed me. 139 00:15:45,526.90797692 --> 00:15:51,376.90797692 It wasn't like, oh wow, like I'm back to the very beginning because now here I am, like in sitting in this pain. 140 00:15:51,706.90797692 --> 00:15:56,86.90797692 It was like these tears that were healing me and I was able to just like. 141 00:15:56,281.90797692 --> 00:16:20,161.90797692 Give my younger self compassion, even myself now, compassion for how far I've made it and even kind of like a little giggle at myself, you know, like, you know, you have, you've worked so hard to get to where you are and life being life, things are gonna happen that are out of your control and you have a God that that cares and wants to sit with you in these moments. 142 00:16:20,161.90797692 --> 00:16:20,611.90797692 And so. 143 00:16:21,451.90797692 --> 00:16:25,141.90797692 Again, healing isn't this like three step process with a clear finish line. 144 00:16:25,681.90797692 --> 00:16:27,91.90797692 It is holy ground. 145 00:16:27,91.90797692 --> 00:16:32,431.90797692 It is a place where, where your wounded spirit meets the God who heals. 146 00:16:32,431.90797692 --> 00:16:34,231.90797692 Like that is his name. 147 00:16:34,321.90797692 --> 00:16:38,431.90797692 He is your protector, your provider, your healer, your comforter. 148 00:16:38,791.90797692 --> 00:16:47,371.9079769 And many times we try to rush out of the pain because we're afraid of of, of what we'll feel if we, if we stay in it. 149 00:16:47,821.9079769 --> 00:16:49,651.9079769 But what if. 150 00:16:50,176.9079769 --> 00:17:09,811.9079769 What if the whole purpose of it is to feel it and to invite God into that process with us so we can lean on him in the middle of the pain and develop this intimacy and dependence on him that is going to show up and help us in all other areas of our life. 151 00:17:10,696.9079769 --> 00:17:21,256.9079769 What if it is a what? If it is a holy ground in this messy middle, messy middle space? You know, we live in this productivity driven culture, hustle culture. 152 00:17:21,496.9079769 --> 00:17:24,586.9079769 Like get through, get, go ahead and get through it. 153 00:17:24,796.9079769 --> 00:17:27,676.9079769 You know, don't stay in the pain for too long. 154 00:17:27,886.9079769 --> 00:17:29,536.9079769 And so like when we're hurting. 155 00:17:29,691.9079769 --> 00:17:29,961.9079769 Right. 156 00:17:29,961.9079769 --> 00:17:46,11.9079769 When we're in this, when we're in this place where we're, we are hurting, right? We are wounded, we feel like we have to bounce back so fast so we can get to back to our work or back to, um, a healthy relationship or back to a good state of mind. 157 00:17:46,561.9079769 --> 00:17:55,591.9079769 But rushing your healing robs you of this deeper encounter that God wants to have with you in the middle of the pain. 158 00:17:55,831.9079769 --> 00:17:58,261.9079769 So back to that Psalm 34 18. 159 00:17:58,261.9079769 --> 00:18:04,951.9079769 The Lord's telling us his promise is that he's close to the broken hearted and save those who are crushed in spirit. 160 00:18:05,371.9079769 --> 00:18:07,531.9079769 Let God stop you. 161 00:18:07,576.9079769 --> 00:18:08,746.9079769 Oh right. 162 00:18:08,746.9079769 --> 00:18:10,246.9079769 Take out the hustle. 163 00:18:10,246.9079769 --> 00:18:16,366.9079769 This you have to be a certain way to be successful or to be in a good spot. 164 00:18:16,756.9079769 --> 00:18:25,696.9079769 Like what if it's in these moments, right? Like letting God stop you in the middle, in this middle portion, in this, in this phase of healing. 165 00:18:26,206.9079769 --> 00:18:31,876.9079769 And instead of asking him, okay, God, how do I get out of this? Right? Get me out of this already. 166 00:18:32,446.9079769 --> 00:18:51,511.9079769 Ask him, God, where are you? In this, what is it like? What is it that you're wanting me to feel or experience in this moment? Like, God, I just need you to sit with me and just allow him to sit with you in the moment he wants. 167 00:18:51,511.9079769 --> 00:18:55,921.9079769 He wants to have this encounter with you in the middle of the pain. 168 00:18:55,921.9079769 --> 00:18:59,371.9079769 Let your paws become your altar. 169 00:19:00,781.9079769 --> 00:19:02,521.9079769 Let his presence be. 170 00:19:02,521.9079769 --> 00:19:04,81.9079769 The answer that you're seeking. 171 00:19:04,81.9079769 --> 00:19:18,631.9079769 This healing destination is literally these moments in his presence where we're able to experience the more and love of God that changes our hearts. 172 00:19:19,756.9079769 --> 00:19:27,106.9079769 That is, that is something that like the Lord Deeply taught me is to value this time where I am healing. 173 00:19:27,106.9079769 --> 00:19:28,936.9079769 It's not this destination, it's not a checklist. 174 00:19:28,936.9079769 --> 00:19:30,736.9079769 It's just moments with him. 175 00:19:31,996.9079769 --> 00:19:40,276.9079769 Second point that I really wanna share with you through this is pain is not proof of failure. 176 00:19:40,906.9079769 --> 00:19:43,876.9079769 It is an invitation to intimacy. 177 00:19:44,416.9079769 --> 00:19:52,66.9079769 And I've said this a little bit here, but, but when we're in this, when we're in these painful moments, this is not a sign that, you know. 178 00:19:52,711.9079769 --> 00:19:54,661.9079769 You have, you're totally off course. 179 00:19:54,661.9079769 --> 00:19:56,41.9079769 You know you're going the wrong way. 180 00:19:56,41.9079769 --> 00:19:56,761.9079769 You have failed. 181 00:19:56,761.9079769 --> 00:19:58,141.9079769 That is not it at all. 182 00:19:58,411.9079769 --> 00:20:02,611.9079769 This is an invitation to invite God in and have this moment of intimacy with him. 183 00:20:03,181.9079769 --> 00:20:07,771.9079769 And so having pain, it does not mean that something is wrong with you. 184 00:20:07,771.9079769 --> 00:20:09,631.9079769 It's not a sign of weakness. 185 00:20:10,21.9079769 --> 00:20:12,211.9079769 Vulnerability is the greatest strength. 186 00:20:12,211.9079769 --> 00:20:19,111.9079769 This is something that really hit home for me because me being like, yes, considered a leader on this trip. 187 00:20:19,141.9079769 --> 00:20:34,231.9079769 The women expressed how they did not realize that me and Brianna were gonna be so vulnerable, and that was so inspiring to them, and it allowed them to open up and be vulnerable and experience their breakthrough with God and. 188 00:20:34,456.9079769 --> 00:20:39,856.9079769 In a sisterhood and in community, because God's word says, confess your sins to one another. 189 00:20:40,6.9079769 --> 00:20:41,956.9079769 This is, I believe it's in James. 190 00:20:42,167.4260593 --> 00:20:43,427.4260593 Five, 16. 191 00:20:43,547.4260593 --> 00:20:47,807.4260593 Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another so that you may be healed. 192 00:20:48,17.4260593 --> 00:21:03,927.4260593 The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much, and so this, these, these moments would not have happened if like there wasn't a call to be vulnerable and to share the dark moments and the hurt and the pain. 193 00:21:03,927.4260593 --> 00:21:06,657.4260593 This is how people are able to connect with you. 194 00:21:06,657.4260593 --> 00:21:07,827.4260593 I don't know if you've ever heard. 195 00:21:08,132.4260593 --> 00:21:15,482.4260593 Of people talking about, or maybe you experience this, like if you can't, it's hard for you to connect with somebody who hasn't been through something hard. 196 00:21:16,92.4260593 --> 00:21:19,452.4260593 And hasn't shared and be, and been been vulnerable and shared with you. 197 00:21:19,452.4260593 --> 00:21:23,982.4260593 Their darkest moments like this is, this is the human experience. 198 00:21:23,982.4260593 --> 00:21:26,322.4260593 This is what allows you to connect with one another. 199 00:21:26,532.4260593 --> 00:21:31,812.4260593 And so being vulnerable, not just with other people, but also with God, this is not a sign of weakness. 200 00:21:31,812.4260593 --> 00:21:39,402.4260593 It's a sign of strength and a sign that you want to heal, and this is where God meets us. 201 00:21:39,692.4260593 --> 00:21:44,672.4260593 De most deeply and most often are in these painful moments. 202 00:21:44,972.4260593 --> 00:21:46,292.4260593 You know, we think God. 203 00:21:47,7.4260593 --> 00:22:04,347.4260593 Are, are only in these big moments, these big breakthroughs, you know, the, the ministry starting, the, the people that are coming to the altar that are being healed from diseases, walking up out of wheelchairs, right? But God is in the very small details as well. 204 00:22:04,652.4260593 --> 00:22:18,122.4260593 He's in the mundane, he's in the times where you are opening your Bible in the morning, where you're making your coffee, where you're in prayer, where you're praying in your heart for, for somebody that you just saw on the side of the road, that that experienced a wreck. 205 00:22:18,122.4260593 --> 00:22:22,742.4260593 Like in these little moments in, in a smile on somebody's face. 206 00:22:22,772.4260593 --> 00:22:30,482.4260593 In a, a friend sharing a word of encouragement to you or a scripture to you that really speaks to you like God's in the small details. 207 00:22:30,482.4260593 --> 00:22:38,42.4260593 He does not only show up in our breakthrough moments, he shows up in, in, in, in the pressing, in the breaking. 208 00:22:38,612.4260593 --> 00:22:42,62.4260593 And sometimes this is where he waits for us. 209 00:22:42,392.4260593 --> 00:22:51,272.4260593 So we learn to need him and not just to seek him for outcomes, not to just seek him for the blessing for his hand, but. 210 00:22:51,852.4260593 --> 00:22:53,382.4260593 In his presence. 211 00:22:53,802.4260593 --> 00:23:02,922.4260593 You ever know, like those moments where you just feel like, I remember this one moment in my adult life, like where I just felt like I needed my father. 212 00:23:03,677.4260593 --> 00:23:09,582.4260593 I, I was like crying in Jamar's lab and I just felt like I just really need my dad right now. 213 00:23:10,557.4260593 --> 00:23:15,912.4260593 And, and maybe you feel that way like with a friend, you're like, I just really need my friend, or I just really need my sister in this moment. 214 00:23:16,152.4260593 --> 00:23:34,842.4260593 Like, this is the, this is the posture, this is the place that, that God, that we build this intimacy with the Lord and we were, we, we learned to, to, to need him to be dependent on him and to not to strive and to do things out of our own strength or seek him just for the blessing. 215 00:23:35,547.4260593 --> 00:23:46,197.4260593 So how you do this is really like shifting your perspective, right? So instead of viewing pain as, as proof of failure, shift your perspective. 216 00:23:46,197.4260593 --> 00:23:56,547.4260593 Like, what if this isn't a setback, right? What if, what if, what if what? You went through the pain, the heartbreak, um, the betrayal, the abandonment, the abuse. 217 00:23:56,547.4260593 --> 00:24:15,237.4260593 What if this isn't a setback? But what if it is sacred ground? What if, what if This is a moment where you build a next level intimacy with the Lord Jesus, with God the Father, that where you invite him into these painful moments, and he does. 218 00:24:15,237.4260593 --> 00:24:20,37.4260593 He starts doing this transformation at a core level within your heart. 219 00:24:20,937.4260593 --> 00:24:27,447.4260593 This is where you're crying with him, where you're talking to him, where you're allowing him to minister to that version of you that still feels broken. 220 00:24:27,507.4260593 --> 00:24:30,297.4260593 And I'm telling you right now, like that feels like magic. 221 00:24:30,447.4260593 --> 00:24:31,587.4260593 It feels like a miracle. 222 00:24:31,587.4260593 --> 00:24:33,147.4260593 There's nothing like it. 223 00:24:33,387.4260593 --> 00:24:43,647.4260593 Like you being able to, I mean, right after that, like I was crying like here and there for the next day, and it was just, I was having these little min like moments where God was ministering to my heart. 224 00:24:44,82.4260593 --> 00:24:45,552.4260593 And it was just beautiful. 225 00:24:45,552.4260593 --> 00:24:51,792.4260593 Like if I could go back and live in that moment again, I would, because I just felt so close with the Lord. 226 00:24:53,22.4260593 --> 00:25:07,182.4260593 And he's so cool because you have different close moments, like you feel like you have this fire inside of you by Holy Spirit, where you are, where you were, where you were in this authority and leadership, and then you have these moments where it's soft, where it's like this. 227 00:25:07,872.4260593 --> 00:25:13,242.4260593 This gentleness and this cuddling with the Lord and you just can't put 'em in a box. 228 00:25:13,242.4260593 --> 00:25:16,932.4260593 And I mean, both, both experiences are so beautiful. 229 00:25:17,412.4260593 --> 00:25:29,832.4260593 Um, but to have that latter one, you've got to just be comfortable sitting and, and an opening and saying yes to the invitation to intimacy. 230 00:25:31,332.4260593 --> 00:25:42,162.4260593 Um, two Corinthians 12, nine says, my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. 231 00:25:42,792.4260593 --> 00:25:44,532.4260593 What a beautiful promise. 232 00:25:44,712.4260593 --> 00:25:49,747.4260593 You really do sense his power and this you lean away from you. 233 00:25:49,752.4260593 --> 00:25:53,982.4260593 You have this deeper revelation of like, it is not by my own understanding. 234 00:25:53,982.4260593 --> 00:25:55,962.4260593 I cannot live by my hand. 235 00:25:56,352.4260593 --> 00:26:00,612.4260593 By my own understanding, but it is by God's power alone. 236 00:26:00,732.4260593 --> 00:26:09,672.4260593 And those revelations come when, when you're sitting with him in the middle of the hurt and the heartache. 237 00:26:10,962.4260593 --> 00:26:14,142.4260593 Now the final point that I wanna share here is. 238 00:26:14,682.4260593 --> 00:26:20,862.4260593 Just this idea, I wanna cast this idea down, this idea that you have to get back up on your own. 239 00:26:21,282.4260593 --> 00:26:24,402.4260593 Truth is you do not have to get back up on your own. 240 00:26:24,402.4260593 --> 00:26:33,972.4260593 And if you do get back up on your own, like kind of what I, and I, I didn't, I wouldn't even consider it getting back up on my own because I did, I needed God in that moment. 241 00:26:33,972.4260593 --> 00:26:37,122.4260593 And this was where I cried out to the Lord like a couple months ago. 242 00:26:37,452.4260593 --> 00:26:38,112.4260593 But it was like. 243 00:26:38,582.4260593 --> 00:26:39,62.4260593 Okay. 244 00:26:39,92.4260593 --> 00:26:42,692.4260593 Like, I resolved this with, with this other person and now I'm good. 245 00:26:42,992.4260593 --> 00:26:45,62.4260593 And it's kind of like moved past it. 246 00:26:45,62.4260593 --> 00:26:48,662.4260593 I didn't sit and and process with the Lord. 247 00:26:48,662.4260593 --> 00:26:56,492.4260593 And so you this idea that like, I, I just wanna hone in on this idea that you do not have to get back up on your own. 248 00:26:56,972.4260593 --> 00:27:03,272.4260593 We tend to wear ourselves out trying to get back to who we were before we went through the pain. 249 00:27:04,122.4260593 --> 00:27:17,712.4260593 But the, the truth of the matter is that that will wear you out and God isn't trying to get you back to who you were before you experienced the pain He's trying to bring, bring in a new and fresh, um. 250 00:27:18,572.4260593 --> 00:27:20,642.4260593 Character of you. 251 00:27:20,702.4260593 --> 00:27:22,952.4260593 He's trying to bring you forward. 252 00:27:23,42.4260593 --> 00:27:27,932.4260593 He's trying to bring you forward in healing and wholeness in him. 253 00:27:28,172.4260593 --> 00:27:30,422.4260593 That comes out of the breaking and pressing. 254 00:27:30,422.4260593 --> 00:27:40,382.4260593 So you're not gonna go back to who you were before, but you're going to be, um, a new type of creation that has come out of this valley. 255 00:27:40,862.4260593 --> 00:27:46,652.4260593 And it's just like a beautiful refining process that's constant throughout your entire life here on earth. 256 00:27:47,667.4260593 --> 00:28:15,837.4260593 And the reason why this is so important is because if you have, if you always have to hold yourself up, and I feel like a lot of women are finding themselves here, like they have all this pressure, whether it's your single mom or your provider for, for your parents now in, in your twenties or thirties or you're, you have this pressure, right, to be provider and to, to get over things and to get back to it. 257 00:28:16,857.4260593 --> 00:28:39,387.4260593 You know, it can cause, it can cause this, um, this like friction with the soft and feminine parts of you, right? You know, if you feel like you have to always be the one to hold you up, you're always going to feel afraid to fall because if you fall. 258 00:28:39,897.4260593 --> 00:28:42,417.4260593 Then everybody else is gonna be affected from it. 259 00:28:42,717.4260593 --> 00:28:46,167.4260593 But the truth is, when you let God hold you. 260 00:28:46,947.4260593 --> 00:28:48,987.4260593 That's where you're gonna find rest. 261 00:28:49,257.4260593 --> 00:28:53,607.4260593 You're gonna find renewal, and you're gonna find a different kind of strength. 262 00:28:53,637.4260593 --> 00:29:04,257.4260593 This like quiet yet, yet, like I'm, I'm still in awe and still like uncovering and, and processing how I'm feeling now. 263 00:29:04,587.4260593 --> 00:29:13,587.4260593 Um, but this, like, this calm and and confident strength that you have truly rooted in the Lord and not in your own power. 264 00:29:14,277.4260593 --> 00:29:15,447.4260593 It's a difference. 265 00:29:15,867.4260593 --> 00:29:29,397.4260593 And so how you start to move into this and shift, right, and, and, and letting God hold you and not getting back up on your own is instead of rushing ahead like I've been, I've kept on telling like, Jamar. 266 00:29:30,57.4260593 --> 00:29:34,77.4260593 Like, I just feel like I'm not in a state of rushing like I was before this trip. 267 00:29:34,377.4260593 --> 00:29:39,687.4260593 I'm not about the hustle, the rush, the chaos, um, the back to back stuff. 268 00:29:40,17.4260593 --> 00:29:47,817.4260593 Like I wanna create space and I just feel so at peace and aligned, um, with this like calm state. 269 00:29:48,207.4260593 --> 00:29:54,177.4260593 And so instead of rushing ahead, make the shift to rest in the truth. 270 00:29:54,867.4260593 --> 00:29:57,327.4260593 And that truth is that you are still. 271 00:29:57,642.4260593 --> 00:30:02,232.4260593 Loved, and you are still chosen and you are still being held. 272 00:30:02,292.4260593 --> 00:30:06,402.4260593 No matter what your age is, you're still a child of the Lord's. 273 00:30:06,402.4260593 --> 00:30:12,462.4260593 You're still his daughter that has these wounds that he's going to reveal to you. 274 00:30:12,512.4260593 --> 00:30:19,142.4260593 As long as you invite him in to those areas and he's gonna continue to mold you as that clay. 275 00:30:19,142.4260593 --> 00:30:28,82.4260593 He's the potter to mold you into the woman who is an overcomer with God as her strength and not her being her own strength. 276 00:30:28,442.4260593 --> 00:30:37,592.4260593 Because you can only get so far if you are trying to do things in your own strength and God wants to, wants to make you fly on the wings of the Eagles. 277 00:30:38,112.4260593 --> 00:30:48,162.4260593 And that's by letting him hold you and not you constantly in this state of getting back up on your own, you don't have to do more to be okay. 278 00:30:48,162.4260593 --> 00:30:53,862.4260593 You don't have to fill your schedule and, and be in this constant state of busyness to be okay. 279 00:30:54,192.4260593 --> 00:30:59,742.4260593 You literally, God's word says, and I've read this while I was on the plane in Ephesians. 280 00:30:59,742.4260593 --> 00:31:00,822.4260593 It was either Ephesians. 281 00:31:00,837.4260593 --> 00:31:04,297.4260593 I believe it was Ephesians two, let me just pull it up. 282 00:31:04,703.0069913 --> 00:31:04,913.0069913 Okay. 283 00:31:04,913.0069913 --> 00:31:05,873.0069913 Yes, I was correct. 284 00:31:05,873.0069913 --> 00:31:19,853.0069913 So Ephesians two 10, it says, for we are his workmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, so that we would walk in them. 285 00:31:20,213.0069913 --> 00:31:21,263.0069913 Interesting. 286 00:31:21,293.0069913 --> 00:31:24,353.0069913 The word walk stood out to me this time. 287 00:31:24,353.0069913 --> 00:31:25,583.0069913 It's not work. 288 00:31:25,853.0069913 --> 00:31:30,173.0069913 Work, so you can move into them, but to walk in them. 289 00:31:30,413.0069913 --> 00:31:43,793.0069913 And so this idea of not striving, but receiving what God has for you, not, um, trying to do things in our own strength, but resting in his promises, right? God already prepared. 290 00:31:44,663.0069913 --> 00:31:53,453.0069913 Our, our works and prepared are what he has us to do beforehand, so that we could just walk in it. 291 00:31:53,663.0069913 --> 00:31:55,73.0069913 It is an invitation. 292 00:31:55,73.0069913 --> 00:32:01,253.0069913 It's not an invitation to work or to strive towards it, but it's an invitation to walk in them. 293 00:32:01,318.0069913 --> 00:32:04,738.0069913 It already being called, already having the work prepared. 294 00:32:04,798.0069913 --> 00:32:13,948.0069913 And so of course it's not to like not to work, but this idea that you have to make things happen on your own is not biblical. 295 00:32:13,948.0069913 --> 00:32:16,408.0069913 It's not, it's not what God has for us to do. 296 00:32:16,408.0069913 --> 00:32:28,288.0069913 It's his promises and he's designed them so we can rest in them and walk into them, which just was so beautiful in this all like. 297 00:32:28,853.0069913 --> 00:32:29,633.0069913 He's so intentional. 298 00:32:29,633.0069913 --> 00:32:33,203.0069913 It all tied together into what he was revealing to me in this trip. 299 00:32:33,473.0069913 --> 00:32:47,633.0069913 Um, but yeah, it like resting in his truth, not, not rushing to the next thing, not having to do more, but just staying with him with the one who makes you whole and healed and fruitful. 300 00:32:47,633.0069913 --> 00:32:49,343.0069913 He is the answer. 301 00:32:49,343.0069913 --> 00:32:52,373.0069913 It's by his hand alone, not yours. 302 00:32:52,673.0069913 --> 00:32:53,483.0069913 And so. 303 00:32:53,903.0069913 --> 00:32:59,633.0069913 You know, I, I, I could go on and on, but I will wrap up the episode here. 304 00:32:59,633.0069913 --> 00:33:20,603.0069913 You know, I hope I pray that this episode gave you permission to just pause in the messy middle, permission to just breathe, to slow down, to let God heal you where it hurts, to invite him in, to expose the parts of you, the wounded spirit within you that maybe you've rushed past and you haven't given any attention to. 305 00:33:21,143.0069913 --> 00:33:21,623.0069913 And. 306 00:33:21,668.0069913 --> 00:33:21,728.0069913 Yeah. 307 00:33:22,238.0069913 --> 00:33:34,988.0069913 Not just where it's, you know, convenient for you to invite him in, but to really allow him to do that deep work in your heart, because those areas that he's not invited into, those are the things that are gonna be holding you back for years to come. 308 00:33:35,348.0069913 --> 00:33:44,843.0069913 And so why not invite him into those areas today? And continually do that as you, he's taking you on this refining process. 309 00:33:45,173.0069913 --> 00:33:49,943.0069913 So those three truths, again, one, healing is not linear. 310 00:33:50,303.0069913 --> 00:33:52,643.0069913 Two, pain is not failure. 311 00:33:52,673.0069913 --> 00:33:56,453.0069913 It's an invitation to go deeper in intimacy with Jesus. 312 00:33:56,573.0069913 --> 00:34:01,133.0069913 And three, you do not have to rise and get back up on your own. 313 00:34:01,433.0069913 --> 00:34:04,943.0069913 He is always there to hold you to be that good Father. 314 00:34:05,623.0069913 --> 00:34:19,183.0069913 If you are wanting some next level of community or to share, there is a community that I've created for the podcast listeners, um, and that is the Healing Circle. 315 00:34:19,243.0069913 --> 00:34:22,783.0069913 You can join in the app wp. 316 00:34:23,173.0069913 --> 00:34:27,313.0069913 Um, that is w.com/the 317 00:34:27,313.0069913 --> 00:34:28,3.0069913 healing circle. 318 00:34:28,613.0069913 --> 00:34:32,663.0069913 That's WHO p.com/the 319 00:34:32,663.0069913 --> 00:34:33,773.0069913 Healing Circle. 320 00:34:33,803.0069913 --> 00:34:42,713.0069913 This is where you can come in and get a little level of community and ask questions and share anything that's on your heart from any of the episodes that you listen to. 321 00:34:43,133.0069913 --> 00:34:44,543.0069913 I truly do love you. 322 00:34:44,873.0069913 --> 00:34:46,223.0069913 God loves you even more. 323 00:34:46,223.0069913 --> 00:34:47,663.0069913 He sees you. 324 00:34:48,288.0069913 --> 00:34:51,828.0069913 Every inch and every part of you, and he loves you still. 325 00:34:52,278.0069913 --> 00:34:54,498.0069913 Keep going, keep going at it. 326 00:34:54,498.0069913 --> 00:34:55,338.0069913 Don't rush. 327 00:34:55,848.0069913 --> 00:35:05,448.0069913 Have these special moments where you just take, take a chill pill, take a little a time back, um, in the quiet and in those moments with the Lord. 328 00:35:05,748.0069913 --> 00:35:09,408.0069913 God is not in a hurry when he's healing you, when he's healing your heart. 329 00:35:09,938.0069913 --> 00:35:18,908.0069913 Just trusting in that process is I believe the best thing that you can do for your past, future, and present self. 330 00:35:19,268.0069913 --> 00:35:20,678.0069913 Alright, I'll see you back here. 331 00:35:20,678.0069913 --> 00:35:22,478.0069913 Same place, same time next week. 332 00:35:22,478.0069913 --> 00:35:22,538.0069913 Bye. 333 00:35:23,702.5962514 --> 00:35:24,632.5962514 Hey, beautiful. 334 00:35:24,632.5962514 --> 00:35:28,232.5962514 I hope you loved hanging with me today and enjoyed the episode. 335 00:35:28,502.5962514 --> 00:35:42,902.5962514 If so, would you take just 30 seconds and share it with someone you love who may also want to heal from past relationships and love themselves again? Also, please scroll down and leave a quick written review for the show on Apple Podcasts. 336 00:35:42,992.5962514 --> 00:35:48,62.5962514 This is the main way we can get this message out to our girlfriends all around the world. 337 00:35:48,307.5962514 --> 00:35:53,707.5962514 And it also just really blesses me to know and hear how this podcast is helping you. 338 00:35:53,767.5962514 --> 00:35:56,857.5962514 Okay, I need to get outta my sweats and get ready for date night. 339 00:35:57,7.5962514 --> 00:36:00,67.5962514 I'll meet you back here on Monday for another episode. 340 00:36:00,187.5962514 --> 00:36:01,807.5962514 Sending you all the love. 341 00:36:01,867.5962514 --> 00:36:03,7.5962514 Until next time.
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