April 8, 2025 • 69 mins
Conquering Anxiety with Faith
In this powerful episode, we delve into the crippling effects of anxiety and how it influences our daily lives. Using scripture from Matthew 6:7-34, we explore a spiritual approach to managing anxiety. Heidi begins by addressing common misconceptions about 'fearing God' and emphasizes the importance of awe and reverence rather than fear. Throughout the message, she uncovers the roots of anxiety in fear, discuss its paralyzing impact, and how Satan exploits it to distance us from God. With practical examples, heartfelt testimonies, and honest dialogue, this episode offers a path to overcoming anxiety through faith, trust in God's plan, and simple living. Join us as we learn to surrender our fears and embrace a life filled with divine love and purpose.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Everybody I talk to has dealt withanxiety or dealing with it right now,
like crippling effects of anxiety.
The effects of it are ruling lives.
It's causing changes in our behaviorand how we interact with everybody.
I'm taking today's message fromMatthew six and it's seven through 34.
(00:23):
I'm going to be reading it in piecesand breaking it down from there.
Before I start though, I wanted totalk about something that has actually
been brought up to me more than oncethis week, so I'm taking that as a sign
that I need to address it real quick.
I've had a lot of people talk to me aboutthe Bible saying that we are fear God.
(00:44):
It mentions it in many verses,talking about fear God, the fear of
God over and over and over, and wehad a message last week about fear.
And that we are to live asGod's children without fear.
So what do we do with that word?
It's saying fear God.
So are we called to be afraid of God?
Absolutely not.
(01:05):
Absolutely not.
That word.
Fear in there.
Replace that with awe.
Replace that with respect and reference.
And it is the understanding of howbig God is, how capable God is, that
he is the ruler and judge over all.
(01:26):
We have nothing to fear ofhim, we're his children.
We're not called to be afraid before God.
We're not called to grovel in front ofhim or any of those things, but we are
called always to have a very healthy,awe filled respect of our Father God.
But don't let that word fearmake you think God is waiting
(01:49):
to crush you with a shoe like.
Screwed up again.
Screwed up again.
Time to take the belt out andwhoop you until you get it right.
Someone's already paid theprice and he was enough.
God is not gonna take paymentfrom us personally for our sins.
We can't do that.
(02:10):
And it's why he sacrificedhis son to cover all of it.
But that fear, when you read thatin the Bible about coming to God
and having that fear, let that bean off filled and reverence filled
time before God to where you'reunderstanding his awesome greatness.
(02:31):
What our Father God is capable.
Yeah.
In one word, this entire universe couldbe gone, could say, I'm done with it.
I'm done with what you've done tothis beautiful world I created.
But he doesn't because we dwell here.
He created this for us.
Out of his unending love for us.
(02:53):
So for those of you who might be partof that group, and there was quite a
few of them, it's been surprising howmany people have asked me about that.
So when I read Fear in the Bible,when I was, the way I was raised,
it was taught that fear, like Iwas literally terrified of God.
We were raised to believe that God'swalking around the earth just waiting
(03:16):
to crush you, waiting to punish you.
He's angry.
He's mad at me.
Anytime I mess up, he's ready tojust, you know, punish me, put me in
the corner and in time out until hesays I'm well worthy of coming out.
I don't ever have to approachmy father God that way, ever.
He is so filled with love andalways just come to me, come to me.
(03:41):
Things are allowed, but it'snot because it's an anger thing.
It's lessons being taught.
It is what he is going todo with what he allows.
So try to approach him withreverence in awe and take your
fear of him out of the equation.
He's your father and he loves you, andnow we're gonna talk about anxiety.
(04:04):
So, and God does have a remedy for that.
This was another one of thosethings where I was positive.
I knew where I wanted to go.
I was ready for anxiety.
Let's talk about it.
I've dealt with it.
Everybody I know has dealt withit, so I'm ready to talk about it.
And then God put me onthis one and left me there.
(04:24):
I'm like, I have a million otherthings I wanted to go with.
There's all kinds of scripture that talksabout anxiety and fear, which tells me.
Ever since the fall, people have dealtwith fear and anxiety because I can
imagine Adam and Eve, as soon as theytook a bite of what they should not
(04:45):
have taken a bite from experience fortheir first time ever and absolute
fear, the recognition was now there.
They got what they wanted.
They didn't know.
They asked for that though.
They thought they had an understanding.
We're gonna be like God, we'regonna understand like God.
(05:07):
So they willingly ate and suddenlyrealized as God's walking through the
garden, I can only imagine the terror.
And it started there.
They didn't have that before.
And now they're fullon feeling the effects.
And guess what?
Every single one of us that followscontinues to feel the effects of fear.
(05:32):
Which is the root that anxiety comes from.
Anxiety is a powerful weaponinto the one who is the liar.
So anxiety, this is onedefinition that I found.
It's a feeling of worry, nervousness, orabout something uncertain or threatening.
(05:54):
It can be a normal response to stress or aprolonged state of fear and apprehension.
And then the psychological definition,anxiety is an emotional state
characterized by excessive worry,nervousness, or fear that can interfere
with daily life, and it often involvesracing thoughts, restlessness,
(06:18):
and difficulty concentrating.
I'm familiar with all of those things.
I don't often realize that it issource is from anxiety, but it is.
Fear.
Think of it this way.
Fear is a natural responseto a danger that's immediate.
Something you can see,something that's right there.
(06:39):
You know, if I have a angry mother bearcharging me because I thought her babies
were cute and I wanted to pet them,I think I'd have a very healthy and
realistic dose of fear like I should.
That would be a normal humanresponse to a very immediate danger.
Anxiety would be, I'm not walking downthat beautiful trail through the woods,
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because what if there is a mother bearout there, and what if there's a cute cub?
What if I wanted to pet it becausethen maybe something back could
happen, so I'm not gonna do it?
That's anxiety.
It didn't happen.
The fear wasn't there.
I didn't see a bear, but in mymind I imagined, well, it could
be there and it could happen.
(07:23):
So to be safe and to not get hurt,I'm gonna stay here and I'm not
gonna walk down a beautiful trail.
So that's how I understand thedifference between a fear, which I
see is that's a healthy response.
God gave that to us to protect us fromsomething we can see, and we know for a
fact our anxiety is based on our thoughtprocess that tells us the potential is
(07:48):
there, that something could happen, andthat excessive worrying about the might.
It could, it is possible.
What if that's all anxietyworking, but it's really good at
crippling us right where we are.
It keeps us from moving forward.
(08:09):
Genesis three, one says,the serpent seduced me.
She said and I ate.. Satanknew exactly what he was doing.
It's a master manipulator.
There's a reason he gotthrown out of heaven.
It was one of the angels,the most beautiful.
If people don't know this part ofit, Satan was in heaven with God.
(08:34):
One of the angels considered the mostbeautiful angel in heaven, and it was
that knowledge that led to his downfall.
A third of the angels with himwere cast out and thrown down.
Satan is not content in letting people be.
The full intention is to bringas many down with him, and
(08:59):
it is pretty remarkable, theenemy that we're up against.
Because he understands us, heunderstands our minds and how we think.
He understands the power thatis in fear and in anxiety.
He understands that it will keepus and separate us from our solid
faith and trust in God as he leads usthrough the plan he has for us in life.
(09:23):
And he keeps us spinning and spinningthose racing thoughts up here.
Thinking about the what ifs.
He loves those and he'll show youall kinds of examples as to why
you can keep thinking that way.
Look at it happened to them over there.
Well, yeah.
The odds, again, struckby lightning though.
We're pretty slim, but, oh, I'm notever walking outside if there's a
(09:45):
lightning storm within 40 miles ayear, 'cause I might get struck.
He uses those things and it plantsso deeply in our mind and we hang
onto that and the plan that Godhas for us starts to get muddled.
We don't see it because we're sodeep and lost in the fears that
(10:08):
we have of what could happen.
It takes our eyes off our father andputs it on the one who is cast out.
This one's beaten.
This one's lost already.
He's got nothing tolose, absolutely nothing.
He knows what's coming, knows the future.
(10:29):
He knows it doesn't meanhe's just gonna sit there and
well, okay, I guess I'm done.
I'm lost.
No, he is hard at work and he usesthings against us like our own emotions.
Matthew six, seven through 18, theworld is full of so-called prayer
warriors who are prayer ignorant.
(10:52):
They're full of formulas and programsand advice peddling techniques for
getting what you want from God.
This was a hard place for me to go.
A lot of times in our searching and ourlonging, you know, our higher power God.
(11:16):
We get a lot and loud voices out inthe world that have a lot to say to us
about, this is how you have to do it.
This is how you get ahead.
This is how you live life.
This is how you're gonna get rich.
This is what blessed looks like.
That enemy of ours, that one who's thewire, it's his favorite way to use it.
(11:40):
Favorite way to use itwhen it's right in church.
Put it right inside church,right in the middle.
Have everybody sitthere and gobble it all.
And people do.
Why?
Because it's pretty and it'sfleshy and it's this and it's that.
And I'm not saying it's all wrong,but I'm saying we have to be careful.
(12:03):
I didn't get caught up in it.
I love a good show.
I love it.
That's what a good show is.
It's about getting our attention.
Yeah, but they're all full of advice forthese solutions to life and the problems,
you know, those things we worry about,you know, the things we're anxious about.
How about finances?
(12:24):
I might burst some bubbleshere with this one.
If your plan to get rich quick is I'mgoing give a hundred dollars to the church
because God's gonna multiply that by athousand and I'm gonna be rich, then I'm
telling you, God doesn't work that way.
You do not give, so you can get, if that'sbeing preached in church, that is a lie.
(12:53):
That is a lie.
You will be blessed if you give froma right heartened spirit, but the
get rich quick to take care of yourfinancial problem doesn't work that way.
God's not sitting there waiting foryou to write out a check so he can
give you a bigger check of moneyin return to get a bigger house
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or a better car or a better this.
You go and you listen and you're hearinga message that leaves you condemned,
that leaves you feeling like you're notgood enough and you have to work harder.
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You have to do better.
You have to be better.
You sinner, you wicked,vile, dirty sinner.
That's not God speaking to youeither, because when he looks
at you, he doesn't see that.
So that voice too, that sits thereendlessly telling you you're not
worthy and you're not enough,that's not God saying that you're
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not worthy and you're not enough.
Remember, he is a liar.
But he uses church I found mosteffectively, and that breaks my
heart because the very place thatwe should come for our healing, the
very place we should be able to comefor our answers, for our support, for
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our love, for redemption and grace.
And mercy is often the place that mostleaves us broken and crushed and defeated.
Broken, crushed, and defeatedis not God's plan for our life
after what he's done for us.
Broken, crush and defeated is anxiety.
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Anxiety is brokenness.
It's being crushed by the world.
It's feeling defeated.
It's feeling unworthy.
It's feeling not good enough.
Hey girl, we love you.
I love you.
Sorry,
I hate that.
This is one of the mostpowerful tools I see currently.
(15:01):
In the hands of the one who lies, andI'm seeing it more and more and more
like that strikes fear in my heart.
Now, openly ask every single one of youhere, if you hear words coming out of
my mouth that are not what God would saythat you feel may not actually be truth.
(15:23):
Please get to me immediately.
Please sit me down andhave that conversation.
It's not lost on me the positionthat I've been called to, and
that's a heavy burden that I carry.
It's that important to me.
(15:44):
I want truth spoken up from herebecause I love you, but because I
know God loves you more and he hasa message that he wants shared with
you, I pray that I'm never a tool.
In the hands of the one who is a liar.
I pray that I'm not the one whofeeds into your anxiety because you
(16:07):
had an expectation that if I livelife this way because I heard it in
church, then this is gonna happen.
Then life is going to get easier.
I'm going to get rich.
All my family's gonnabe restored back to me.
A little part of me I found out,did actually believe pieces of that
and I didn't even know it becausewhen I got good and I'm in recovery,
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I don't drink or use or anything.
I expected financial thingswould get a bit better.
My kids would all come flocking backand surround me in a big happy thing.
Life would be smooth sailing.
Well,
I got to that point and notonly did my kids not all coming
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back, two more joined them.
So now four out of the sixreally rarely ever talk to me.
I don't understand that.
I don't understand the timing ofthat, but I've given that to God.
Uh, financial piece.
It's a good thing.
I'm not motivated by moneybecause, you know, God has
taught us a big lesson in faith.
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Um, so my husband'snot employed right now.
That was a new developmentthat happened after that.
Wasn't God writing a big fatcheck, but he was saying, trust
me with the plan I have for you.
And we do.
I mean, it's surprisingly weird tohave this newly let go from a job
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guy over here, happy as a clam,living his best life because he
feels like it's God's will for him.
Do you know what a delightto my heart that is?
Like I take such joy in that Ihave no worry or fear over that,
in that smooth sailing light.
Oh.
I got some choppy seas that are going on.
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I have people taking pot shots at me.
I've had a few arrows hit the mark,but I've learned how to pull 'em up and
heal the damage, and I keep on going.
But this what so often happens.
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This is just a dangerous thing.
It's a dangerous thing when the father ofwise has gotten into church and it erodes
and undermines all that God really is.
So instead of preaching the whole,let's get you rich, let's make life
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easy, and all this other kind of stuff,instead of doing that, which sets up
for failure, why isn't church talking?
Just honest truth, justthe real honest truth.
Yeah, choosing Jesus and jumpingfull on into that life best
decision you'll ever make.
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And guess what?
The road gets bumpy.
It's not smooth sailing.
I didn't suddenly go onto thisgloriously, newly paved street that's
just like the best scenery all on bothsides of my car going down the road.
It's been everything, but, but it is beenthe best journey I've ever been on in my
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entire life because I finally understandit's a plan that God has for me, and I am
trusting now that all those bumps, they'vebeen becoming these beautiful things.
The outcomes were not the main source.
What he did with that bump that I thoughtmight be a bad thing, became something
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beyond anything I could have imagined,but it's trusting in that, but it's
having discernment with what you hear.
The worst kind of anxiety is the kindof anxiety that interferes with your
relationship with your father thatmakes him feel like he's unattainable.
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That makes you feel like you haveto go to a church building to listen
to somebody standing up here tellingyou how you have to think and how you
have to believe because I know it all.
Because I'm gonna read thingsthat you don't understand.
I'm gonna exe and break things down.
I'm gonna tell you what the Greek was,the Hebrew was and all this kind of
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stuff, and you're gonna hear things andwords that you're like not even sure what
that word is 'cause nobody uses that.
But I better keep coming back'cause I gotta figure out this
God thing that's not okay.
The person standing up here is nodifferent than any of you sitting
in the pews right where you are.
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They just had a calling to speak.
I don't know why he chose me, becausemy giftedness was never speaking.
It struck fear in my heart.
I'd be three words in and I'd becrying because my nerves were that bad.
But when you ask God to take you outof the way, so it can be all him,
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it's my prayer that what he wantsyou to hear, you're going to hear.
And if you feel that that's notwhat you're hearing, I'm starting
off the sermon on anxiety.
Call me out.
Call me out, because my only desireis that truth is spoken here.
Because then you can build thatfoundation where anxiety doesn't grow
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so big because we know who our fatherreally is and who he honestly is.
And he didn't put us here to live alife that wasn't full and joy filled.
No matter the circumstances
got that big one out of the way.
This gets me in hot water, so.
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Churches are a place too where
a lot of fighting will happen.
They don't like to be called on somethings and um, I have to be called on
some things and truth has to be spoken.
All right?
Don't fall for their nonsense.
This is your father you aredealing with and he knows
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better than you what you need.
We get anxious, I think,over a lot of wants,
and as we sit here in America with allthat, we have wants and needs become a
blurred thing for us because a lot of thethings we consider a need is certainly
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not a need in a lot of other countries.
You know, like I need fast wifi like now.
So my smartphone, mytablet, my laptop, my.
Desktop, my kids stuff, the game system,because you know that all has to work.
You know, I have a frickingrefrigerator at home and a stove
at home that literally run on wifi.
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I could pull up right now and showyou what's inside my refrigerator
if you so wanted to see.
There's not much in there,but there's couple things.
But is that a need?
When did that become a need for us?
We get that very skewed.
It's no wonder that here we are in anation where everything's available,
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all the opportunities, we're safe.
We can have all the views we want.
That's very obvious, but we live inmore anxiety than almost anywhere else.
Why is that?
We should have the least to worry about?
People are like, well, what about,you know, if I don't have a house,
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what if I don't have whatever?
But we live in a country where nobodyrealistically has to go without shelter.
It may not be the best, may not be prime,it may not be in our mind what we envision
that should look like, but will provide.
Yes, if we're willing to acceptwhat he gives or do we say,
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well, that's not good enough.
I had a little of that whenwe were looking for our house.
Oh, the adventure of trying to finda house for sale in that market.
Woo.
And we're looking and we're looking in it.
Shocking.
Looking back now, and I'm a littleembarrassed, but it's like the houses
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we were looking at, they started toget a little bigger and then a little
bigger and then a little bigger,and it's like, oh, it's okay though.
The mortgage approved you to this.
Opens up the houses you look at,they're getting bigger and bigger.
And then you pull up andyou're like, this is glorious.
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And you can picture yourself living there.
You're already happy over something.
You haven't even walked in thefront door or signed on the
paper, but, oh, this is mine.
I can feel it.
And that happened in one house,like, oh, it's got this nook.
I can sit here and watchthe river going by.
And it's got the barn andthe land and it's beautiful.
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Just beautiful thought for sure.
Like we even had signs,this is gonna be my house.
This is great.
But it was all me.
And again, as in all the onesbefore, weird things happened that
weren't even on our side of thingswhere we're like at the last minute.
Yeah, that's it's, that'snot gonna be available.
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And I'm like, but that was my house.
Until I get this call about thisplace in Fenwick that I had never
heard about in my entire life.
'cause this girl grew up in Hudsonville.
I'm an Ottawa County girl.
Like I don't know about this Fenwickplace, but let me see how far
from Grand Rapids it is because myhusband there said, I work in Grand
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Rapids, so as long as we're an houror less, he's all like, everything
I looked at was on the outskirts,but you said an hour or less so.
And sure enough, Fenwickfell into that criteria.
The other thing that I had wantedis not to be on a busy road.
I would love to have some woods.
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The water would be like, I had this listof things and I drove to this house.
After I'm like losing mymind, lost another house.
I'm gonna call one more person.
This is it.
If this don't work, we'restaying in Rockford.
That's just it.
I'm over it.
My plan's not working, still not thinkingmaybe I should see what God's got for me.
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So I made that phone call and that'swhen he said, what about Fenwick?
Got a house going upon the market tomorrow?
Says, in fact the owners just saidthat they are not there anymore.
Everything's out.
They left the door open.
Go ahead, drive out thereand walk through it.
I drove out there, I turned downto Fenwick Road and I'm like,
oh, I'm driving through farmland.
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This is great.
There's all this woodland.
I'm like, this is wonderful.
Finally found this road 'cause GPSat the time didn't even recognize it.
So I kept turning down somebody else'sprivate drive, but I eventually found
the right one and as I'm drivingI'm like, it's got a very long
drive back here, third of a mileoff the road and turn a corner even
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so literally can't even see a road.
He answered that prayer.
The woods.
I have a beautiful pine.
Forest on one side, beautifulhardwoods right out the back.
And guess what bumps up to it?
Hundreds of acres of stateland with, guess what?
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A huge duck pond.
Oh my goodness.
I got woods, I got water.
I'm off the road.
The whole thing, it was nothing special.
It wasn't a show house still isn't.
But I love it.
Needed a lot of work.
But I can do that.
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You know that diamond in the rub.
The thing I didn't know I wasgonna love, I thought it was that
house that God was bringing me to.
'cause he provided, there'sno other explanation.
'cause I never would've lookedat Fenwick for a place to live.
I didn't know anything about it.
Nothing.
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But God did.
But that wasn't why it was that house.
And I recognize that now.
God had a plan and a place I needed to be.
I sat there worried and anxious over thisthe whole time because this plan that
I had, this stuff that we were talkingabout, what life was gonna look like and
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all this stuff, God's like, that's notthe plan I'm calling I have on your life.
If one of those houses hadworked out, this wouldn't exist.
I wouldn't be here.
I wouldn't have said yes to ministry.
I'd be working a full-time job with myhusband because we'd be trying to sit
and pay for a house that we didn't need.
It's two people with a bunchof little dogs and Marley,
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but it's just the two of us.
We didn't need those big houses.
I didn't need a mortgage that big.
I didn't need to be inthe right neighborhood.
I didn't need those things,but I thought I did.
'cause you know I'm gonna looklike where I'm doing better
and like life is successful.
My kids will look at me andsay, mom's doing so great.
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That superficial garbagemeans nothing to me.
Now I'm so joyful that we're in a house,has a tiny little mortgage on it that
we're making into the house that we enjoy.
That's just a few minutes awayfrom a building that I adore
being in, serving people thatI love more than I can express.
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My anxiety could havekept me from that though.
God knew what we needed, heunderstood it and he kept us from
that, what was not meant for us.
And I got upset.
I started getting filledwith fear and anxiety.
'cause we were temporarily rentingthis place in Rockford and it
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was beautiful right downtown.
We could see the river, the walkingpath, and everybody hung out.
And it was grand because it wasthe desirable street, but it
was not cheap to live there.
It's a lot of money to throw away.
So then I had anxiety over that.
How long are we gonna throw money away?
How long, you know, the, andover and over and over and over.
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And those were my drinking days.
So there was a lot of, life is rough andhard and we're never, you know, I even
went like, we're never gonna find a place,find some boxes and go down by the river.
I guess that's what's gonnahappen, because, you know, of
course it goes from that to, youknow, there's no house for me.
No, not everybody else gets a house,but we don't, no, I have those thoughts
(31:07):
and I'm worried and worried and worried.
How do I figure it out?
But I didn't take it toGod like I needed to.
So remember that He knows, he knowswhat you need as you're worrying and
stewing about it, trying to find theanswer, trying to figure out god's
like, are you gonna look over here?
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Just keep your eyes on me and follow me.
'cause I'm gonna show you.
That's all you have to do.
Just look at him, he'll show you.
So with a God like this, loving you,you can pray very simply like this.
This comes from the message version.
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We're all familiar with the Lord's Prayer.
I'm very surprised that it wasthe Lord's Prayer that came up
in my message about anxiety.
But when you break itdown, it's not a surprise.
It isn't a surprise.
Our anxiety often comes from prayingprayers that aren't the simplicity
of what the Lord's Prayer is.
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So in the message version, it says this,our father in heaven reveal who you are.
Set the world right and do what's best.
As above so below, keepus alive with three.
Square meals keep us forgiven withyou and forgiving others keep us
(32:36):
safe from ourselves and the devil.
Remember, he is a liar.
You are in charge.
You can do anything you want.
You are a blaze in beauty.
Yes, yes, yes.
We were given this prayer by Jesus
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who has everything at hisdisposal can ask for anything.
Nowhere in here does it say,pray for a bigger house.
Pray for more money.
Pray for the right job.
Pray for the right relationship.
Change my life this way.
Get me this wardrobe.
This car's not good enough.
None of that is in there.
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None of it.
It is down to the very basic, just.
Gimme enough to, can I have enough to eat?
Forgive me, but allow me to forgiveothers like you've forgiven me.
Let me live that kind of a life.
It comes down to a pretty simple andbasic way of living life, and I'm
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finding as I'm stripping away allthe extras that my life used to have
and the extras being my thoughts andideas on what it should be like, I'm
finding it's my dealing with anxiety islessening and lessening and lessening.
I long for a life of simplicity.
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A life just simply led from aplace of love, A life led from just
simple trust in our father God,
do we really think he'snot gonna provide for us
after what he gave up.
For us.
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He didn't allow us
to crucify his son so he couldforsake us and not care for
us, and we often live life.
I think I know I'm guilty ofit, as if that weren't the case.
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Jeremiah 2316 through 17 says
A message from God of the angel armies.
I love how this is phrasedin the message so much.
I love the word pictures of it.
Don't listen to thesermons of the prophets.
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It's all hot air.
Lies, lies and more lies.
They make it all up.
Not a word they speak comes from me.
They preach there, everythingwill turn out fine.
Sermon to congregationswith no taste for God.
They're nothing badwill ever happen to you.
Sermon to people who areset in their own ways.
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Sometimes things don't turn out fineand sometimes bad things happen.
I'm pretty certain every single one of ushere could speak to both of those things.
I know that I could.
I know for a fact a lot of you canbecause you've shared stories with me.
I know where you've come from.
I know what you've been through, and Ialso know that's just the surface of it.
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But those lies that that mesomehow, God is angry with you.
That you are unforgiven, that you'reseparated from Now, that's not truth.
That isn't truth.
Matthew six 19 through 24,
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it's obvious, isn't it?
The place where your treasure is,is the place you will most want to
be and you will end up being there.
Where is your treasure?
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Where's my treasure?
You know, what's themost important to you?
You know, think of that the, your topthree things most important to you.
What would you put on that list?
What's number one?
What's number two?
What's number three?
Top three priorities.
For a lot of peoplethis would come to mind.
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Oh, gonna retire in my thirties,independently wealthy, you know,
price old Bitcoin or something.
I don't know.
I don't know how people do.
I don't know how they getrich with, I don't know if
that hasn't come into my life.
But once I have money and I'mvacationing or living in glamorous
places and my pictures on Pinterestand Facebook are better than anybody
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else's 'cause I'm so blessed.
Those are my favorite.
So blessed.
Look at this.
Look at my, my backyard.
It just got redone.
It had a nice pool.
But look at this one.
Oh, it's an infinity poolwith a built-in hot tub.
The kids have their own'cause can't have 'em in mine.
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And God, I was, I'm so blessed.
Is that what that is though?
Is it really?
I feel the sadness now so often forthose searching for their joy in
that, in the what I get, what I have,what my title is, what my position
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is, what people think of me, youknow, if I get all that stuff right.
You know these people here, theydon't have the care in the world.
Anxiety.
Oh, look at 'em, theydon't know what it is.
I mean, she's got a glassof wine in her hand.
Things are great.
I'm living my best life.
I'm so happy.
Look at me.
I'm smiling as I'm looking upin the distance looking perfect.
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I'm telling you this isn't the answer.
I didn't have this life,
but in the past I've had,
I didn't have to live on a budget.
If I wanted something, I usually could.
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We get it.
Wanted to travel, we travel.
I've had that.
It is some of the worstperiods of my life.
Money and having it.
There's nothing wrong ifyou, if you've been blessed
financially, that isn't wrong.
That also is a gift from God and tosome people he does give that to.
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But if he hasn't blessed you financially,that doesn't mean you've fallen short.
It doesn't mean he loves you less.
There is no joy that is found in money.
And maybe that sounds foolish becauseyou're picturing all these things.
Well, I should be happyas I'm driving that.
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I'd be real happy if Icould wear that outfit.
That's amazing.
I'd be so happy if somethingthat money could buy.
People that are blessedfinancially have a heavy burden.
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And the reason for it, the lastthought I had when money was no
worry, was God, I didn't need 'em.
Why?
I don't have problems.
Why do I need God to fix anything for me?
Look at me.
Hashtag blessed, hmm, blessed by who
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I wasn't.
I was God loved, but I wasn'tGod blessed at that time.
I'm thankful, sorry, babe, that we aren'tindependently wealthy because I know
myself, I, I greatly prefer this self.
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I take joy in small things.
I love finding the best pair ofpants at the consignment store.
I think it's amazing.
I've heard some people say,I would never wear something
that somebody else ever wore.
Why?
Why?
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I know.
I don't understand that anymore.
I think your focus changes whenyour priority changes anxiety.
Is that drive to have somethingyou haven't been given?
I think most of us, really, if you lookaround, you've been given some amazing
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things and sometimes it's not things.
Sometimes you have to open your eyesand see who God surrounded you with.
I know every single individualsitting in here, if you look around,
you are blessed beyond measureby the people sitting around you.
I know the people sitting around you.
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They be there for you.
You have a struggle, you have a need, youhave a worry, anxiety running your life.
Look around you at these people.
I know for a fact that people sittingin this space would sit with you in
that and talk with you through that.
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I know God always will, but Ialso know God understands humans.
We need tangible thingssometime in our life.
We were not wired to be alone.
We were wired for community.
Don understands that we can't physicallysee God other than the fact that he is
(42:52):
everything and in all things because allcomes from him, but our human eyes don't.
See God like we see otherpeople, and I believe that's why
community is so important, becausethat's how God shows himself.
It's how he reveals himself.
It is why, why we are called to live alife modeled after the way Jesus lived.
(43:15):
Why we are called to live a lifeled with love, because that is
the foundation of who God is
Snap found in this.
If you've been blessed withthis, God didn't bless you,
so you could hang onto it.
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Hang on to it real tight and get moreand more and more and more and more.
I'm not saying it's wrong toenjoy what God's given you.
If you can take a vacation and see thisbeautiful world that he's created, do it.
If you fall in love with a beautifulspace that happens to be a big,
(43:59):
beautiful home, enjoy that.
God gave that to you.
But don't forget,
there are strings attached to thatbecause if your eyes don't notice
needs around you that the money he'sgiven you could help in some way.
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Those are things we need to answer for.
I'm gonna have to answer fora period of time in my life.
So I didn't share.
I didn't share withpeople outside my family.
It was me and the kids.
My wardrobe was amazing.
I had great shoes.
I used to be a shoegirl, had all that stuff.
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I wish I could turn back theclock and clear all that out and
take that money and do with it.
What would've been good.
What would've made adifference for other people?
Not so I could get more, but soI could give the feeling that God
gives us for serving like that.
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When you sit alone stewing and worryingand hanging on and trying to get more,
God will never allow you to be subtle.
You won't be becauseyou're not in his plan.
Don't fear being generous.
We are called to be a generous people.
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God has promised to care and provide foryou in all things and all your needs.
He knows every single one of you.
He knows your day one andhe knows your end day.
Actually, you'll never have an end day'cause eternities a pretty long time.
He knows your last day here and heknows what every point between A and
b. Looks like he's got it all known.
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We can trust him in that.
He tells us to try him.
He never said, we can't question, butmaintain your trust in the questioning.
He understands our human minds.
He created us, had to sacrifice hisson because he understood how we are.
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Matthew 6 25 to 29, look at the birds.
They're free and unfettered.
They're not tied downto a job description.
They're careless in the care of dad, andyou count far more to him than the birds.
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I don't think anxiety is a hugeissue in the wildlife that I see.
Maybe the squirrels trying to crossthe road before a car comes or.
You know the turkeys that arejust like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You know?
And I don't know what's goingthrough their little heads when
those kinds of things happen.
But the animals are not living theirlife from a place of anxiety and fear.
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Maybe because they live that simple life.
You know, you sleep, you get up, youfind food, you raise your family,
you go to sleep, and you try notto have some higher order animal
catch in, make you their dinner.
Maybe there's some fear in that.
But animals aren't like us.
They don't live in fear,they don't live in worry.
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They're just doing whatthey were created to do.
And in that aspect, we're to do the same.
We are created to dowhat we were created for.
If we are not doing that, I have found outin my life that you get very unsettled.
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You're very fearful filled.
You're often filled with anxiety.
It was those times where I had to sitwith myself and say, where am I not
living my life in the way that I should?
What am I not doing to serveothers that I should be?
It is miraculous to me that thathas been the most pivotal thing in
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my entire life, is finding out thatservice to others is the most profound
source of healing and change youcould ever find in your entire life.
Giving of self without out expectation,because humanly speaking, if I
(48:30):
stood here as a human, I'd belike, I'm going to do this for you.
This took my time, it tookpreparation, it took this, I
think it's worth about this, so
give it to me.
That's not serving.
Serving is no expectation.
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Serving
is done for God and your calling.
And for others it's not for self.
Why?
Because my favorite picture,because this is our model.
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More than the birds.
More than the animals,more than this earth.
More than anything.
More than anything.
This world was broken by the fall.
Jesus didn't comfort this world, thisround thing in space that we live on,
it wasn't that, that God came to repair.
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'cause if we look around,we see a world that's dying.
You know that realization.
I sit here with my thoughts sometimeand I started noticing it's like,
my gosh, if you really look theworld, this planet, it's dying.
It's falling apart.
It's changing.
And I'm like, we're watching death happen.
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I, I think for a while I used to thinkit's just the people, you know, when we
fell, people started breaking all thefear, the anxiety, everything came, but
the earth stopped being perfect then too.
We're living on a dying world.
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He came for us.
He came because he knew what ourdecision in that garden way back
then, when we're like, we want know itall, just like God, we want that too.
It's appealing, I mean.
We can sit here and judge Adamand Eve all day long, like
(50:48):
their fault that we're here.
Any one of us would'vedone the same thing.
Living imper, perfection.
You have everything you need and beyond.
I can't imagine the world they lived inbecause I see things in my world that are
beautiful, like breathtakingly beautiful,and I'm looking at a broken world.
(51:12):
Mm-hmm.
What did it look like before it broke?
And humans even then,listen to the liar said,
you're not gonna die.
Oh yeah.
That God, yeah.
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No, he doesn't want you to have this.
Because you know, if you havethis, you're going to know more.
You're gonna have knowledge,you're going to know good,
and you're going to know evil.
I would've like, I'd like to believethat if I would've heard that, I'd
be like, but I don't wanna know evil.
But all they heard is like, I canbe like, God, I can know it all.
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Sign me up, let me eat it.
Willing to pay that price, notknowing the price, but you find
out as soon as you take that biteand then there's no going back, and
that's what happened, which is why
(52:18):
Jesus did what he did.
I would give anything in theworld to take fear and anxiety.
Out of this world, because Isee the damage and the harm
(52:40):
that it does to so many.
The voices in your head telling you thingsthat aren't true, keeping you frozen and
inaction and it's bad enough, or peoplewithout a substance use, I think it gets a
little extra for those of us going throughthat part because we have that added thing
(53:02):
of knowing what people think about us.
We know what people say about us.
We know the judgments people have.
I'm in a really unique position ofdoing what we do here, and I talk to
a lot of people on the outside andthey explain it in the descriptions
in ways some people word what I do andchoose to do and the people I serve.
(53:27):
I really have to fight my angersometimes over the Judge Mentalness.
That people have, but I remind myselfthey're uneducated and they don't know.
Just don't know.
Don't worry about missing out.
(53:50):
You'll find all your everydayhuman concerns will be met.
Give your entire attention towhat God is doing right now
and don't get worked up aboutwhat may or not happen tomorrow.
(54:10):
God will help you deal with whateverhard things come up when the time comes.
I wish these were easy things to do.
I am not gonna stand uphere and say, it's so easy.
(54:30):
Just do this.
There you go.
Everybody better, feeling better.
All that anxiety and fear gone.
It doesn't work that way becauseit is a choice you have to
make over and over and over.
Do I trust God to help me dealwith whatever comes or don't I?
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If you say yes to that and youreally mean it, you have to step
away from your fear and your anxiety.
God, there it is.
Excuse me,
I'm not bringing it with meanymore 'cause I can't change it.
I can't make my kids talk to me, can'tbring my kid home from a war zone.
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I can't change what happened in the past.
I can't put more dollarsin my bank account.
I can't this, I can't that.
I can't that.
So I'm gonna sit and just worry about it.
I've learned that thatdoesn't help anything.
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It makes it worse and it makesme away from my father, God.
And I can tell you without lying, 100% ofthe time, God has provided for my needs.
Even when I wasn't walking with my eyes onhim, didn't mean his eyes weren't on me.
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He's always known where I was.
He's been with me inevery decision I made.
Talk about shame.
That's where my shame comes from.
Not that other people willfind out or could find out.
I don't think there'sanything left out there.
'cause I put it all out there.
I might as well.
You can go dig in.
I don't care.
I'll gladly talk about itbecause isn't that amazing?
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Isn't he amazing?
Look what he's done in my life.
But the knowledge that in those moments,
even if nobody else saw God wassitting right there with me when I
made that decision and that choice.
Every time I took a drink,
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that was it right next to me.
Every time I got drunk, everytime I got blacked out drunk,
every time I made the fool out ofmyself, every time I hurt somebody.
Every single time.
Every single time he was right there.
And the part that is the hardestfor me is that the entire time he
(57:17):
was there, he's like, I love you.
I love you.
I'm right here.
I love you.
He never got mad, nevertold me how worthless I was.
That was my own voice in my head.
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'cause I didn't listen'cause I didn't believe it.
'cause fear.
It's a powerful weapon.
He will help you withwhatever hard things come.
This is filled with hard thingsthat came to people's lives,
(58:02):
filled over and over and over.
And I think it's one of the reasons whyfear and worry is one of the topics.
It talks about hundreds andhundreds and hundreds of times.
Some versions have over500 references to fear.
(58:27):
If things are talked about frequentlyin the Bible, three, four or five, six
times is something to take note of.
It's all to take note of, but hundredsof times that tells me how big fear has
been in people's lives for centuries.
It's not new to us.
We're just unique in the situations thatwe work in and deal with and live in.
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Jeremiah 29, 11 through 18,
I know what I'm doing.
I have it all planned out.
Plans to take care ofyou, not abandon you.
(59:18):
Plans to give you the future you hope for.
When you call on me, when youcome and pray to me, I'll listen.
When you come lookingfor me, you'll find me.
Yes.
When you get serious about finding meand you want it more than anything else,
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I'll make sure you won't be disappointed.
That's God's decree.
I'll turn things around for you.
I'll bring you back from all thecountries into which I drove you God's
decree and bring you home to the placefrom which I sent you off into exile.
You can count on it.
(01:00:04):
We're often in exile and far off lands.
Think of the journeysour lives have taken.
My drinking, that was my faroff land, that was my exile.
God allowed me to end up there.
He knew where I was gonna end up.
He was right there the whole timejust waiting for me to look at him.
(01:00:26):
But that was my exile.
But for right now, because you'vetaken up with these newfangled
prophets who set themselves up asBabylon specialists, spreading the
(01:00:47):
word, God sent them just for us.
God is setting the records straightAs for the king sitting on David's
throne and all the people left inJerusalem who didn't go into exile with
you, they're facing some bad times.
God of the Angel Army says, watch this.
Catastrophe is on the way.
(01:01:08):
War and hunger disease, there'rea barrel of rotten apples.
I'll rid the country of themthrough war and hunger and disease.
The whole world is going tohold its nose at the smell shut
its eyes at the horrible site.
They'll end up in slung ghettos becausethey wouldn't listen to a thing I
said when I sent my servant prophetspreaching tirelessly and urgently, no,
(01:01:35):
they wouldn't listen to a word I said.
It's kind of an ugly picture of whatcan happen out there in the world, but
it's what happens when we don't listen.
It's what happened to me.
(01:01:55):
Things were stinking tohigh happen in this world.
I was trying to live, you know, Ithought I had a figure, you know,
a good idea of life and what agood plan for life looks like, but
it was a slummy, stinky, smelly,rotten place, all dressed up in a
nice house, in a nice neighborhood.
(01:02:15):
Didn't change what it really was.
All we have to do is listen Inthose times when the anxiety has
taken over and the fear is huge,you don't know where to turn.
And I'm telling you, if you're in earlyrecovery, that happens all the time.
It's a whole new way of living.
How do I do it?
(01:02:37):
How?
Who do I listen to?
Everybody's got advice.
It's gonna happen.
People are in unique andindividual and your journeys are
gonna be unique and individual,but there is one who does know.
But it takes quietness.
It takes a heart to listen.
(01:02:58):
You have to want to hear andyou have to want to follow it,
not only if it's going togive you what you want.
We have to be content with our needs beingmet and looking the way that they do.
Right now, if you can'tbe content right now,
(01:03:23):
ask yourself why?
Because everything you have, everythingI have everything you don't have.
Everything I don't have
is God's decision.
Nothing I did put me here.
(01:03:45):
Nothing.
I can say that for absolute fact.
It was never my intention in this lifetimeto be up here talking on a Sunday morning.
This isn't me.
An outreach center for recovery, huh?
If you thought that in my dreams ofmy retirement years that that was part
(01:04:09):
of it, Uhuh was never on my radar.
But I sat and worried abouthow am I gonna retire?
And that was starting to scare me.
Like, really Eat me up.
'cause you hear the things you needthis much to retire, comfortably have
this and you gotta plan for this.
And then, I mean every, I mean,I'm getting to where I have to
(01:04:31):
try and pick apart the medic.
I'm like, do I want A, do I want B?
Is it gonna cover this?
Is it gonna, there's so many thingsand I was so filled with worry.
But if we live the God planned way, trustand being grateful and thankful for here
and now, knowing that he has a plan,knowing that every need will be met.
(01:04:58):
And remembering that needsare very different than wants.
Let go of your wants.
Just let 'em all go.
Are your needs met?
Everybody here is wearing clothes.
So that room was met.
Nobody looks like they're skeletaland haven't eaten in weeks.
Those needs were met.
(01:05:23):
There's more than one person in here.
The need for community was met.
God meets needs.
Always the anxiety and the fear.
(01:05:43):
It is a hard thing for me whenI sit in my anxiety and fear.
'cause it's like, where's my trust?
God, I made a promise to you andI failed again because I'm scared.
I don't see your plan and it's hardfor me to trust you right now, but I
want you, it's okay to tell God that.
I want you to know that come to God asyou are in every bit of your brokenness.
(01:06:10):
And just put it out there.
If you need examples of it, getinto some of David Sounds and
listen to how he talked to God.
Everything from broken on hisface in the dirt tear covered in
brokenness to literally shakinghis fist at God in making demands.
(01:06:33):
That's the God we can go to.
God says we can try him.
I promised test me.
'cause he is never failed.
If he says your needsare met, I will provide.
He's not a liar.
(01:06:53):
Sometimes that voice though that we hearmakes us look at it as if it's a lie.
Because why am I living herethen if you're taking care of me,
but you're living someplace.
Right.
(01:07:15):
I am envious at times of peoplethat live very simple, basic lives
in those third world countries.
And, um,
because I think it's easier to find yourjoy, I think it's easier to be happy.
The kids don't sit thereon tablets and technology.
They're not worried aboutsmartphones or cell tower reception.
(01:07:36):
They're not worried about getting theirhouse repainted in the color of the year.
For Sherwin Williams, they're not wearingthe latest and greatest of fashion.
They're not paying a fortunefor their shoes, none of it.
They send their kids off, whoknows how far to get water.
They try to scratch up some fruit fromthe thing, and they live in these joyful
(01:07:58):
communities of laughter and happiness,thankful for what they've been given.
And there's beauty in that kind of a life.
Anxiety doesn't.
Consume them.
And it's funny how having everythingwe want leads us only to more
worry and fear and anxiety.
(01:08:24):
Think the end.
You're probably going, thank goodness,how long are you gonna talk about this?
But this is a big topic and it's,
it's just gonna be part of life.
And it becomes a choice of handing itto God who knows what to do with it.
Or you can sit and hang on it andcontinue to spin and worry and be
(01:08:48):
fearful, but you don't have to.
So I'm asking you please, if thatconsumes you, if you walked in carrying
that, there's plenty of room up here.
Just leave it, leave it, give itto God and tell him you're done.
'cause he knows what to do with it.
And I promise you.
(01:09:10):
He will do what he will do.
Just trust him.
Thank you.
We're gonna finish with, um, onelast song and then we'll pray
and then we're going to eat good.
Everybody I talk to has dealt withanxiety or dealing with it right now,
like crippling effects of anxiety.
The effects of it are ruling lives.
It's causing changes in our behaviorand how we interact with everybody.
I'm taking today's message fromMatthew six and it's seven through 34.
(00:23):
I'm going to be reading it in piecesand breaking it down from there.
Before I start though, I wanted totalk about something that has actually
been brought up to me more than oncethis week, so I'm taking that as a sign
that I need to address it real quick.
I've had a lot of people talk to me aboutthe Bible saying that we are fear God.
(00:44):
It mentions it in many verses,talking about fear God, the fear of
God over and over and over, and wehad a message last week about fear.
And that we are to live asGod's children without fear.
So what do we do with that word?
It's saying fear God.
So are we called to be afraid of God?
Absolutely not.
(01:05):
Absolutely not.
That word.
Fear in there.
Replace that with awe.
Replace that with respect and reference.
And it is the understanding of howbig God is, how capable God is, that
he is the ruler and judge over all.
(01:26):
We have nothing to fear ofhim, we're his children.
We're not called to be afraid before God.
We're not called to grovel in front ofhim or any of those things, but we are
called always to have a very healthy,awe filled respect of our Father God.
But don't let that word fearmake you think God is waiting
(01:49):
to crush you with a shoe like.
Screwed up again.
Screwed up again.
Time to take the belt out andwhoop you until you get it right.
Someone's already paid theprice and he was enough.
God is not gonna take paymentfrom us personally for our sins.
We can't do that.
(02:10):
And it's why he sacrificedhis son to cover all of it.
But that fear, when you read thatin the Bible about coming to God
and having that fear, let that bean off filled and reverence filled
time before God to where you'reunderstanding his awesome greatness.
(02:31):
What our Father God is capable.
Yeah.
In one word, this entire universe couldbe gone, could say, I'm done with it.
I'm done with what you've done tothis beautiful world I created.
But he doesn't because we dwell here.
He created this for us.
Out of his unending love for us.
(02:53):
So for those of you who might be partof that group, and there was quite a
few of them, it's been surprising howmany people have asked me about that.
So when I read Fear in the Bible,when I was, the way I was raised,
it was taught that fear, like Iwas literally terrified of God.
We were raised to believe that God'swalking around the earth just waiting
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to crush you, waiting to punish you.
He's angry.
He's mad at me.
Anytime I mess up, he's ready tojust, you know, punish me, put me in
the corner and in time out until hesays I'm well worthy of coming out.
I don't ever have to approachmy father God that way, ever.
He is so filled with love andalways just come to me, come to me.
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Things are allowed, but it'snot because it's an anger thing.
It's lessons being taught.
It is what he is going todo with what he allows.
So try to approach him withreverence in awe and take your
fear of him out of the equation.
He's your father and he loves you, andnow we're gonna talk about anxiety.
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So, and God does have a remedy for that.
This was another one of thosethings where I was positive.
I knew where I wanted to go.
I was ready for anxiety.
Let's talk about it.
I've dealt with it.
Everybody I know has dealt withit, so I'm ready to talk about it.
And then God put me onthis one and left me there.
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I'm like, I have a million otherthings I wanted to go with.
There's all kinds of scripture that talksabout anxiety and fear, which tells me.
Ever since the fall, people have dealtwith fear and anxiety because I can
imagine Adam and Eve, as soon as theytook a bite of what they should not
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have taken a bite from experience fortheir first time ever and absolute
fear, the recognition was now there.
They got what they wanted.
They didn't know.
They asked for that though.
They thought they had an understanding.
We're gonna be like God, we'regonna understand like God.
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So they willingly ate and suddenlyrealized as God's walking through the
garden, I can only imagine the terror.
And it started there.
They didn't have that before.
And now they're fullon feeling the effects.
And guess what?
Every single one of us that followscontinues to feel the effects of fear.
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Which is the root that anxiety comes from.
Anxiety is a powerful weaponinto the one who is the liar.
So anxiety, this is onedefinition that I found.
It's a feeling of worry, nervousness, orabout something uncertain or threatening.
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It can be a normal response to stress or aprolonged state of fear and apprehension.
And then the psychological definition,anxiety is an emotional state
characterized by excessive worry,nervousness, or fear that can interfere
with daily life, and it often involvesracing thoughts, restlessness,
(06:18):
and difficulty concentrating.
I'm familiar with all of those things.
I don't often realize that it issource is from anxiety, but it is.
Fear.
Think of it this way.
Fear is a natural responseto a danger that's immediate.
Something you can see,something that's right there.
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You know, if I have a angry mother bearcharging me because I thought her babies
were cute and I wanted to pet them,I think I'd have a very healthy and
realistic dose of fear like I should.
That would be a normal humanresponse to a very immediate danger.
Anxiety would be, I'm not walking downthat beautiful trail through the woods,
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because what if there is a mother bearout there, and what if there's a cute cub?
What if I wanted to pet it becausethen maybe something back could
happen, so I'm not gonna do it?
That's anxiety.
It didn't happen.
The fear wasn't there.
I didn't see a bear, but in mymind I imagined, well, it could
be there and it could happen.
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So to be safe and to not get hurt,I'm gonna stay here and I'm not
gonna walk down a beautiful trail.
So that's how I understand thedifference between a fear, which I
see is that's a healthy response.
God gave that to us to protect us fromsomething we can see, and we know for a
fact our anxiety is based on our thoughtprocess that tells us the potential is
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there, that something could happen, andthat excessive worrying about the might.
It could, it is possible.
What if that's all anxietyworking, but it's really good at
crippling us right where we are.
It keeps us from moving forward.
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Genesis three, one says,the serpent seduced me.
She said and I ate.. Satanknew exactly what he was doing.
It's a master manipulator.
There's a reason he gotthrown out of heaven.
It was one of the angels,the most beautiful.
If people don't know this part ofit, Satan was in heaven with God.
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One of the angels considered the mostbeautiful angel in heaven, and it was
that knowledge that led to his downfall.
A third of the angels with himwere cast out and thrown down.
Satan is not content in letting people be.
The full intention is to bringas many down with him, and
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it is pretty remarkable, theenemy that we're up against.
Because he understands us, heunderstands our minds and how we think.
He understands the power thatis in fear and in anxiety.
He understands that it will keepus and separate us from our solid
faith and trust in God as he leads usthrough the plan he has for us in life.
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And he keeps us spinning and spinningthose racing thoughts up here.
Thinking about the what ifs.
He loves those and he'll show youall kinds of examples as to why
you can keep thinking that way.
Look at it happened to them over there.
Well, yeah.
The odds, again, struckby lightning though.
We're pretty slim, but, oh, I'm notever walking outside if there's a
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lightning storm within 40 miles ayear, 'cause I might get struck.
He uses those things and it plantsso deeply in our mind and we hang
onto that and the plan that Godhas for us starts to get muddled.
We don't see it because we're sodeep and lost in the fears that
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we have of what could happen.
It takes our eyes off our father andputs it on the one who is cast out.
This one's beaten.
This one's lost already.
He's got nothing tolose, absolutely nothing.
He knows what's coming, knows the future.
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He knows it doesn't meanhe's just gonna sit there and
well, okay, I guess I'm done.
I'm lost.
No, he is hard at work and he usesthings against us like our own emotions.
Matthew six, seven through 18, theworld is full of so-called prayer
warriors who are prayer ignorant.
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They're full of formulas and programsand advice peddling techniques for
getting what you want from God.
This was a hard place for me to go.
A lot of times in our searching and ourlonging, you know, our higher power God.
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We get a lot and loud voices out inthe world that have a lot to say to us
about, this is how you have to do it.
This is how you get ahead.
This is how you live life.
This is how you're gonna get rich.
This is what blessed looks like.
That enemy of ours, that one who's thewire, it's his favorite way to use it.
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Favorite way to use itwhen it's right in church.
Put it right inside church,right in the middle.
Have everybody sitthere and gobble it all.
And people do.
Why?
Because it's pretty and it'sfleshy and it's this and it's that.
And I'm not saying it's all wrong,but I'm saying we have to be careful.
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I didn't get caught up in it.
I love a good show.
I love it.
That's what a good show is.
It's about getting our attention.
Yeah, but they're all full of advice forthese solutions to life and the problems,
you know, those things we worry about,you know, the things we're anxious about.
How about finances?
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I might burst some bubbleshere with this one.
If your plan to get rich quick is I'mgoing give a hundred dollars to the church
because God's gonna multiply that by athousand and I'm gonna be rich, then I'm
telling you, God doesn't work that way.
You do not give, so you can get, if that'sbeing preached in church, that is a lie.
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That is a lie.
You will be blessed if you give froma right heartened spirit, but the
get rich quick to take care of yourfinancial problem doesn't work that way.
God's not sitting there waiting foryou to write out a check so he can
give you a bigger check of moneyin return to get a bigger house
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or a better car or a better this.
You go and you listen and you're hearinga message that leaves you condemned,
that leaves you feeling like you're notgood enough and you have to work harder.
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You have to do better.
You have to be better.
You sinner, you wicked,vile, dirty sinner.
That's not God speaking to youeither, because when he looks
at you, he doesn't see that.
So that voice too, that sits thereendlessly telling you you're not
worthy and you're not enough,that's not God saying that you're
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not worthy and you're not enough.
Remember, he is a liar.
But he uses church I found mosteffectively, and that breaks my
heart because the very place thatwe should come for our healing, the
very place we should be able to comefor our answers, for our support, for
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our love, for redemption and grace.
And mercy is often the place that mostleaves us broken and crushed and defeated.
Broken, crushed, and defeatedis not God's plan for our life
after what he's done for us.
Broken, crush and defeated is anxiety.
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Anxiety is brokenness.
It's being crushed by the world.
It's feeling defeated.
It's feeling unworthy.
It's feeling not good enough.
Hey girl, we love you.
I love you.
Sorry,
I hate that.
This is one of the mostpowerful tools I see currently.
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In the hands of the one who lies, andI'm seeing it more and more and more
like that strikes fear in my heart.
Now, openly ask every single one of youhere, if you hear words coming out of
my mouth that are not what God would saythat you feel may not actually be truth.
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Please get to me immediately.
Please sit me down andhave that conversation.
It's not lost on me the positionthat I've been called to, and
that's a heavy burden that I carry.
It's that important to me.
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I want truth spoken up from herebecause I love you, but because I
know God loves you more and he hasa message that he wants shared with
you, I pray that I'm never a tool.
In the hands of the one who is a liar.
I pray that I'm not the one whofeeds into your anxiety because you
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had an expectation that if I livelife this way because I heard it in
church, then this is gonna happen.
Then life is going to get easier.
I'm going to get rich.
All my family's gonnabe restored back to me.
A little part of me I found out,did actually believe pieces of that
and I didn't even know it becausewhen I got good and I'm in recovery,
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I don't drink or use or anything.
I expected financial thingswould get a bit better.
My kids would all come flocking backand surround me in a big happy thing.
Life would be smooth sailing.
Well,
I got to that point and notonly did my kids not all coming
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back, two more joined them.
So now four out of the sixreally rarely ever talk to me.
I don't understand that.
I don't understand the timing ofthat, but I've given that to God.
Uh, financial piece.
It's a good thing.
I'm not motivated by moneybecause, you know, God has
taught us a big lesson in faith.
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Um, so my husband'snot employed right now.
That was a new developmentthat happened after that.
Wasn't God writing a big fatcheck, but he was saying, trust
me with the plan I have for you.
And we do.
I mean, it's surprisingly weird tohave this newly let go from a job
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guy over here, happy as a clam,living his best life because he
feels like it's God's will for him.
Do you know what a delightto my heart that is?
Like I take such joy in that Ihave no worry or fear over that,
in that smooth sailing light.
Oh.
I got some choppy seas that are going on.
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I have people taking pot shots at me.
I've had a few arrows hit the mark,but I've learned how to pull 'em up and
heal the damage, and I keep on going.
But this what so often happens.
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This is just a dangerous thing.
It's a dangerous thing when the father ofwise has gotten into church and it erodes
and undermines all that God really is.
So instead of preaching the whole,let's get you rich, let's make life
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easy, and all this other kind of stuff,instead of doing that, which sets up
for failure, why isn't church talking?
Just honest truth, justthe real honest truth.
Yeah, choosing Jesus and jumpingfull on into that life best
decision you'll ever make.
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And guess what?
The road gets bumpy.
It's not smooth sailing.
I didn't suddenly go onto thisgloriously, newly paved street that's
just like the best scenery all on bothsides of my car going down the road.
It's been everything, but, but it is beenthe best journey I've ever been on in my
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entire life because I finally understandit's a plan that God has for me, and I am
trusting now that all those bumps, they'vebeen becoming these beautiful things.
The outcomes were not the main source.
What he did with that bump that I thoughtmight be a bad thing, became something
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beyond anything I could have imagined,but it's trusting in that, but it's
having discernment with what you hear.
The worst kind of anxiety is the kindof anxiety that interferes with your
relationship with your father thatmakes him feel like he's unattainable.
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That makes you feel like you haveto go to a church building to listen
to somebody standing up here tellingyou how you have to think and how you
have to believe because I know it all.
Because I'm gonna read thingsthat you don't understand.
I'm gonna exe and break things down.
I'm gonna tell you what the Greek was,the Hebrew was and all this kind of
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stuff, and you're gonna hear things andwords that you're like not even sure what
that word is 'cause nobody uses that.
But I better keep coming back'cause I gotta figure out this
God thing that's not okay.
The person standing up here is nodifferent than any of you sitting
in the pews right where you are.
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They just had a calling to speak.
I don't know why he chose me, becausemy giftedness was never speaking.
It struck fear in my heart.
I'd be three words in and I'd becrying because my nerves were that bad.
But when you ask God to take you outof the way, so it can be all him,
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it's my prayer that what he wantsyou to hear, you're going to hear.
And if you feel that that's notwhat you're hearing, I'm starting
off the sermon on anxiety.
Call me out.
Call me out, because my only desireis that truth is spoken here.
Because then you can build thatfoundation where anxiety doesn't grow
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so big because we know who our fatherreally is and who he honestly is.
And he didn't put us here to live alife that wasn't full and joy filled.
No matter the circumstances
got that big one out of the way.
This gets me in hot water, so.
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Churches are a place too where
a lot of fighting will happen.
They don't like to be called on somethings and um, I have to be called on
some things and truth has to be spoken.
All right?
Don't fall for their nonsense.
This is your father you aredealing with and he knows
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better than you what you need.
We get anxious, I think,over a lot of wants,
and as we sit here in America with allthat, we have wants and needs become a
blurred thing for us because a lot of thethings we consider a need is certainly
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not a need in a lot of other countries.
You know, like I need fast wifi like now.
So my smartphone, mytablet, my laptop, my.
Desktop, my kids stuff, the game system,because you know that all has to work.
You know, I have a frickingrefrigerator at home and a stove
at home that literally run on wifi.
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I could pull up right now and showyou what's inside my refrigerator
if you so wanted to see.
There's not much in there,but there's couple things.
But is that a need?
When did that become a need for us?
We get that very skewed.
It's no wonder that here we are in anation where everything's available,
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all the opportunities, we're safe.
We can have all the views we want.
That's very obvious, but we live inmore anxiety than almost anywhere else.
Why is that?
We should have the least to worry about?
People are like, well, what about,you know, if I don't have a house,
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what if I don't have whatever?
But we live in a country where nobodyrealistically has to go without shelter.
It may not be the best, may not be prime,it may not be in our mind what we envision
that should look like, but will provide.
Yes, if we're willing to acceptwhat he gives or do we say,
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well, that's not good enough.
I had a little of that whenwe were looking for our house.
Oh, the adventure of trying to finda house for sale in that market.
Woo.
And we're looking and we're looking in it.
Shocking.
Looking back now, and I'm a littleembarrassed, but it's like the houses
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we were looking at, they started toget a little bigger and then a little
bigger and then a little bigger,and it's like, oh, it's okay though.
The mortgage approved you to this.
Opens up the houses you look at,they're getting bigger and bigger.
And then you pull up andyou're like, this is glorious.
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And you can picture yourself living there.
You're already happy over something.
You haven't even walked in thefront door or signed on the
paper, but, oh, this is mine.
I can feel it.
And that happened in one house,like, oh, it's got this nook.
I can sit here and watchthe river going by.
And it's got the barn andthe land and it's beautiful.
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Just beautiful thought for sure.
Like we even had signs,this is gonna be my house.
This is great.
But it was all me.
And again, as in all the onesbefore, weird things happened that
weren't even on our side of thingswhere we're like at the last minute.
Yeah, that's it's, that'snot gonna be available.
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And I'm like, but that was my house.
Until I get this call about thisplace in Fenwick that I had never
heard about in my entire life.
'cause this girl grew up in Hudsonville.
I'm an Ottawa County girl.
Like I don't know about this Fenwickplace, but let me see how far
from Grand Rapids it is because myhusband there said, I work in Grand
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Rapids, so as long as we're an houror less, he's all like, everything
I looked at was on the outskirts,but you said an hour or less so.
And sure enough, Fenwickfell into that criteria.
The other thing that I had wantedis not to be on a busy road.
I would love to have some woods.
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The water would be like, I had this listof things and I drove to this house.
After I'm like losing mymind, lost another house.
I'm gonna call one more person.
This is it.
If this don't work, we'restaying in Rockford.
That's just it.
I'm over it.
My plan's not working, still not thinkingmaybe I should see what God's got for me.
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So I made that phone call and that'swhen he said, what about Fenwick?
Got a house going upon the market tomorrow?
Says, in fact the owners just saidthat they are not there anymore.
Everything's out.
They left the door open.
Go ahead, drive out thereand walk through it.
I drove out there, I turned downto Fenwick Road and I'm like,
oh, I'm driving through farmland.
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This is great.
There's all this woodland.
I'm like, this is wonderful.
Finally found this road 'cause GPSat the time didn't even recognize it.
So I kept turning down somebody else'sprivate drive, but I eventually found
the right one and as I'm drivingI'm like, it's got a very long
drive back here, third of a mileoff the road and turn a corner even
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so literally can't even see a road.
He answered that prayer.
The woods.
I have a beautiful pine.
Forest on one side, beautifulhardwoods right out the back.
And guess what bumps up to it?
Hundreds of acres of stateland with, guess what?
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A huge duck pond.
Oh my goodness.
I got woods, I got water.
I'm off the road.
The whole thing, it was nothing special.
It wasn't a show house still isn't.
But I love it.
Needed a lot of work.
But I can do that.
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You know that diamond in the rub.
The thing I didn't know I wasgonna love, I thought it was that
house that God was bringing me to.
'cause he provided, there'sno other explanation.
'cause I never would've lookedat Fenwick for a place to live.
I didn't know anything about it.
Nothing.
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But God did.
But that wasn't why it was that house.
And I recognize that now.
God had a plan and a place I needed to be.
I sat there worried and anxious over thisthe whole time because this plan that
I had, this stuff that we were talkingabout, what life was gonna look like and
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all this stuff, God's like, that's notthe plan I'm calling I have on your life.
If one of those houses hadworked out, this wouldn't exist.
I wouldn't be here.
I wouldn't have said yes to ministry.
I'd be working a full-time job with myhusband because we'd be trying to sit
and pay for a house that we didn't need.
It's two people with a bunchof little dogs and Marley,
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but it's just the two of us.
We didn't need those big houses.
I didn't need a mortgage that big.
I didn't need to be inthe right neighborhood.
I didn't need those things,but I thought I did.
'cause you know I'm gonna looklike where I'm doing better
and like life is successful.
My kids will look at me andsay, mom's doing so great.
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That superficial garbagemeans nothing to me.
Now I'm so joyful that we're in a house,has a tiny little mortgage on it that
we're making into the house that we enjoy.
That's just a few minutes awayfrom a building that I adore
being in, serving people thatI love more than I can express.
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My anxiety could havekept me from that though.
God knew what we needed, heunderstood it and he kept us from
that, what was not meant for us.
And I got upset.
I started getting filledwith fear and anxiety.
'cause we were temporarily rentingthis place in Rockford and it
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was beautiful right downtown.
We could see the river, the walkingpath, and everybody hung out.
And it was grand because it wasthe desirable street, but it
was not cheap to live there.
It's a lot of money to throw away.
So then I had anxiety over that.
How long are we gonna throw money away?
How long, you know, the, andover and over and over and over.
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And those were my drinking days.
So there was a lot of, life is rough andhard and we're never, you know, I even
went like, we're never gonna find a place,find some boxes and go down by the river.
I guess that's what's gonnahappen, because, you know, of
course it goes from that to, youknow, there's no house for me.
No, not everybody else gets a house,but we don't, no, I have those thoughts
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and I'm worried and worried and worried.
How do I figure it out?
But I didn't take it toGod like I needed to.
So remember that He knows, he knowswhat you need as you're worrying and
stewing about it, trying to find theanswer, trying to figure out god's
like, are you gonna look over here?
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Just keep your eyes on me and follow me.
'cause I'm gonna show you.
That's all you have to do.
Just look at him, he'll show you.
So with a God like this, loving you,you can pray very simply like this.
This comes from the message version.
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We're all familiar with the Lord's Prayer.
I'm very surprised that it wasthe Lord's Prayer that came up
in my message about anxiety.
But when you break itdown, it's not a surprise.
It isn't a surprise.
Our anxiety often comes from prayingprayers that aren't the simplicity
of what the Lord's Prayer is.
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So in the message version, it says this,our father in heaven reveal who you are.
Set the world right and do what's best.
As above so below, keepus alive with three.
Square meals keep us forgiven withyou and forgiving others keep us
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safe from ourselves and the devil.
Remember, he is a liar.
You are in charge.
You can do anything you want.
You are a blaze in beauty.
Yes, yes, yes.
We were given this prayer by Jesus
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who has everything at hisdisposal can ask for anything.
Nowhere in here does it say,pray for a bigger house.
Pray for more money.
Pray for the right job.
Pray for the right relationship.
Change my life this way.
Get me this wardrobe.
This car's not good enough.
None of that is in there.
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None of it.
It is down to the very basic, just.
Gimme enough to, can I have enough to eat?
Forgive me, but allow me to forgiveothers like you've forgiven me.
Let me live that kind of a life.
It comes down to a pretty simple andbasic way of living life, and I'm
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finding as I'm stripping away allthe extras that my life used to have
and the extras being my thoughts andideas on what it should be like, I'm
finding it's my dealing with anxiety islessening and lessening and lessening.
I long for a life of simplicity.
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A life just simply led from aplace of love, A life led from just
simple trust in our father God,
do we really think he'snot gonna provide for us
after what he gave up.
For us.
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He didn't allow us
to crucify his son so he couldforsake us and not care for
us, and we often live life.
I think I know I'm guilty ofit, as if that weren't the case.
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Jeremiah 2316 through 17 says
A message from God of the angel armies.
I love how this is phrasedin the message so much.
I love the word pictures of it.
Don't listen to thesermons of the prophets.
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It's all hot air.
Lies, lies and more lies.
They make it all up.
Not a word they speak comes from me.
They preach there, everythingwill turn out fine.
Sermon to congregationswith no taste for God.
They're nothing badwill ever happen to you.
Sermon to people who areset in their own ways.
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Sometimes things don't turn out fineand sometimes bad things happen.
I'm pretty certain every single one of ushere could speak to both of those things.
I know that I could.
I know for a fact a lot of you canbecause you've shared stories with me.
I know where you've come from.
I know what you've been through, and Ialso know that's just the surface of it.
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But those lies that that mesomehow, God is angry with you.
That you are unforgiven, that you'reseparated from Now, that's not truth.
That isn't truth.
Matthew six 19 through 24,
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it's obvious, isn't it?
The place where your treasure is,is the place you will most want to
be and you will end up being there.
Where is your treasure?
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Where's my treasure?
You know, what's themost important to you?
You know, think of that the, your topthree things most important to you.
What would you put on that list?
What's number one?
What's number two?
What's number three?
Top three priorities.
For a lot of peoplethis would come to mind.
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Oh, gonna retire in my thirties,independently wealthy, you know,
price old Bitcoin or something.
I don't know.
I don't know how people do.
I don't know how they getrich with, I don't know if
that hasn't come into my life.
But once I have money and I'mvacationing or living in glamorous
places and my pictures on Pinterestand Facebook are better than anybody
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else's 'cause I'm so blessed.
Those are my favorite.
So blessed.
Look at this.
Look at my, my backyard.
It just got redone.
It had a nice pool.
But look at this one.
Oh, it's an infinity poolwith a built-in hot tub.
The kids have their own'cause can't have 'em in mine.
(37:58):
And God, I was, I'm so blessed.
Is that what that is though?
Is it really?
I feel the sadness now so often forthose searching for their joy in
that, in the what I get, what I have,what my title is, what my position
(38:19):
is, what people think of me, youknow, if I get all that stuff right.
You know these people here, theydon't have the care in the world.
Anxiety.
Oh, look at 'em, theydon't know what it is.
I mean, she's got a glassof wine in her hand.
Things are great.
I'm living my best life.
I'm so happy.
Look at me.
I'm smiling as I'm looking upin the distance looking perfect.
(38:45):
I'm telling you this isn't the answer.
I didn't have this life,
but in the past I've had,
I didn't have to live on a budget.
If I wanted something, I usually could.
(39:06):
We get it.
Wanted to travel, we travel.
I've had that.
It is some of the worstperiods of my life.
Money and having it.
There's nothing wrong ifyou, if you've been blessed
financially, that isn't wrong.
That also is a gift from God and tosome people he does give that to.
(39:31):
But if he hasn't blessed you financially,that doesn't mean you've fallen short.
It doesn't mean he loves you less.
There is no joy that is found in money.
And maybe that sounds foolish becauseyou're picturing all these things.
Well, I should be happyas I'm driving that.
(39:54):
I'd be real happy if Icould wear that outfit.
That's amazing.
I'd be so happy if somethingthat money could buy.
People that are blessedfinancially have a heavy burden.
(40:16):
And the reason for it, the lastthought I had when money was no
worry, was God, I didn't need 'em.
Why?
I don't have problems.
Why do I need God to fix anything for me?
Look at me.
Hashtag blessed, hmm, blessed by who
(40:39):
I wasn't.
I was God loved, but I wasn'tGod blessed at that time.
I'm thankful, sorry, babe, that we aren'tindependently wealthy because I know
myself, I, I greatly prefer this self.
(41:02):
I take joy in small things.
I love finding the best pair ofpants at the consignment store.
I think it's amazing.
I've heard some people say,I would never wear something
that somebody else ever wore.
Why?
Why?
(41:23):
I know.
I don't understand that anymore.
I think your focus changes whenyour priority changes anxiety.
Is that drive to have somethingyou haven't been given?
I think most of us, really, if you lookaround, you've been given some amazing
(41:48):
things and sometimes it's not things.
Sometimes you have to open your eyesand see who God surrounded you with.
I know every single individualsitting in here, if you look around,
you are blessed beyond measureby the people sitting around you.
I know the people sitting around you.
(42:10):
They be there for you.
You have a struggle, you have a need, youhave a worry, anxiety running your life.
Look around you at these people.
I know for a fact that people sittingin this space would sit with you in
that and talk with you through that.
(42:31):
I know God always will, but Ialso know God understands humans.
We need tangible thingssometime in our life.
We were not wired to be alone.
We were wired for community.
Don understands that we can't physicallysee God other than the fact that he is
(42:52):
everything and in all things because allcomes from him, but our human eyes don't.
See God like we see otherpeople, and I believe that's why
community is so important, becausethat's how God shows himself.
It's how he reveals himself.
It is why, why we are called to live alife modeled after the way Jesus lived.
(43:15):
Why we are called to live a lifeled with love, because that is
the foundation of who God is
Snap found in this.
If you've been blessed withthis, God didn't bless you,
so you could hang onto it.
(43:35):
Hang on to it real tight and get moreand more and more and more and more.
I'm not saying it's wrong toenjoy what God's given you.
If you can take a vacation and see thisbeautiful world that he's created, do it.
If you fall in love with a beautifulspace that happens to be a big,
(43:59):
beautiful home, enjoy that.
God gave that to you.
But don't forget,
there are strings attached to thatbecause if your eyes don't notice
needs around you that the money he'sgiven you could help in some way.
(44:20):
Those are things we need to answer for.
I'm gonna have to answer fora period of time in my life.
So I didn't share.
I didn't share withpeople outside my family.
It was me and the kids.
My wardrobe was amazing.
I had great shoes.
I used to be a shoegirl, had all that stuff.
(44:44):
I wish I could turn back theclock and clear all that out and
take that money and do with it.
What would've been good.
What would've made adifference for other people?
Not so I could get more, but soI could give the feeling that God
gives us for serving like that.
(45:05):
When you sit alone stewing and worryingand hanging on and trying to get more,
God will never allow you to be subtle.
You won't be becauseyou're not in his plan.
Don't fear being generous.
We are called to be a generous people.
(45:26):
God has promised to care and provide foryou in all things and all your needs.
He knows every single one of you.
He knows your day one andhe knows your end day.
Actually, you'll never have an end day'cause eternities a pretty long time.
He knows your last day here and heknows what every point between A and
b. Looks like he's got it all known.
(45:51):
We can trust him in that.
He tells us to try him.
He never said, we can't question, butmaintain your trust in the questioning.
He understands our human minds.
He created us, had to sacrifice hisson because he understood how we are.
(46:15):
Matthew 6 25 to 29, look at the birds.
They're free and unfettered.
They're not tied downto a job description.
They're careless in the care of dad, andyou count far more to him than the birds.
(46:40):
I don't think anxiety is a hugeissue in the wildlife that I see.
Maybe the squirrels trying to crossthe road before a car comes or.
You know the turkeys that arejust like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You know?
And I don't know what's goingthrough their little heads when
those kinds of things happen.
But the animals are not living theirlife from a place of anxiety and fear.
(47:04):
Maybe because they live that simple life.
You know, you sleep, you get up, youfind food, you raise your family,
you go to sleep, and you try notto have some higher order animal
catch in, make you their dinner.
Maybe there's some fear in that.
But animals aren't like us.
They don't live in fear,they don't live in worry.
(47:25):
They're just doing whatthey were created to do.
And in that aspect, we're to do the same.
We are created to dowhat we were created for.
If we are not doing that, I have found outin my life that you get very unsettled.
(47:47):
You're very fearful filled.
You're often filled with anxiety.
It was those times where I had to sitwith myself and say, where am I not
living my life in the way that I should?
What am I not doing to serveothers that I should be?
It is miraculous to me that thathas been the most pivotal thing in
(48:08):
my entire life, is finding out thatservice to others is the most profound
source of healing and change youcould ever find in your entire life.
Giving of self without out expectation,because humanly speaking, if I
(48:30):
stood here as a human, I'd belike, I'm going to do this for you.
This took my time, it tookpreparation, it took this, I
think it's worth about this, so
give it to me.
That's not serving.
Serving is no expectation.
(48:51):
Serving
is done for God and your calling.
And for others it's not for self.
Why?
Because my favorite picture,because this is our model.
(49:17):
More than the birds.
More than the animals,more than this earth.
More than anything.
More than anything.
This world was broken by the fall.
Jesus didn't comfort this world, thisround thing in space that we live on,
it wasn't that, that God came to repair.
(49:39):
'cause if we look around,we see a world that's dying.
You know that realization.
I sit here with my thoughts sometimeand I started noticing it's like,
my gosh, if you really look theworld, this planet, it's dying.
It's falling apart.
It's changing.
And I'm like, we're watching death happen.
(50:02):
I, I think for a while I used to thinkit's just the people, you know, when we
fell, people started breaking all thefear, the anxiety, everything came, but
the earth stopped being perfect then too.
We're living on a dying world.
(50:24):
He came for us.
He came because he knew what ourdecision in that garden way back
then, when we're like, we want know itall, just like God, we want that too.
It's appealing, I mean.
We can sit here and judge Adamand Eve all day long, like
(50:48):
their fault that we're here.
Any one of us would'vedone the same thing.
Living imper, perfection.
You have everything you need and beyond.
I can't imagine the world they lived inbecause I see things in my world that are
beautiful, like breathtakingly beautiful,and I'm looking at a broken world.
(51:12):
Mm-hmm.
What did it look like before it broke?
And humans even then,listen to the liar said,
you're not gonna die.
Oh yeah.
That God, yeah.
(51:34):
No, he doesn't want you to have this.
Because you know, if you havethis, you're going to know more.
You're gonna have knowledge,you're going to know good,
and you're going to know evil.
I would've like, I'd like to believethat if I would've heard that, I'd
be like, but I don't wanna know evil.
But all they heard is like, I canbe like, God, I can know it all.
(51:57):
Sign me up, let me eat it.
Willing to pay that price, notknowing the price, but you find
out as soon as you take that biteand then there's no going back, and
that's what happened, which is why
(52:18):
Jesus did what he did.
I would give anything in theworld to take fear and anxiety.
Out of this world, because Isee the damage and the harm
(52:40):
that it does to so many.
The voices in your head telling you thingsthat aren't true, keeping you frozen and
inaction and it's bad enough, or peoplewithout a substance use, I think it gets a
little extra for those of us going throughthat part because we have that added thing
(53:02):
of knowing what people think about us.
We know what people say about us.
We know the judgments people have.
I'm in a really unique position ofdoing what we do here, and I talk to
a lot of people on the outside andthey explain it in the descriptions
in ways some people word what I do andchoose to do and the people I serve.
(53:27):
I really have to fight my angersometimes over the Judge Mentalness.
That people have, but I remind myselfthey're uneducated and they don't know.
Just don't know.
Don't worry about missing out.
(53:50):
You'll find all your everydayhuman concerns will be met.
Give your entire attention towhat God is doing right now
and don't get worked up aboutwhat may or not happen tomorrow.
(54:10):
God will help you deal with whateverhard things come up when the time comes.
I wish these were easy things to do.
I am not gonna stand uphere and say, it's so easy.
(54:30):
Just do this.
There you go.
Everybody better, feeling better.
All that anxiety and fear gone.
It doesn't work that way becauseit is a choice you have to
make over and over and over.
Do I trust God to help me dealwith whatever comes or don't I?
(54:55):
If you say yes to that and youreally mean it, you have to step
away from your fear and your anxiety.
God, there it is.
Excuse me,
I'm not bringing it with meanymore 'cause I can't change it.
I can't make my kids talk to me, can'tbring my kid home from a war zone.
(55:22):
I can't change what happened in the past.
I can't put more dollarsin my bank account.
I can't this, I can't that.
I can't that.
So I'm gonna sit and just worry about it.
I've learned that thatdoesn't help anything.
(55:45):
It makes it worse and it makesme away from my father, God.
And I can tell you without lying, 100% ofthe time, God has provided for my needs.
Even when I wasn't walking with my eyes onhim, didn't mean his eyes weren't on me.
(56:08):
He's always known where I was.
He's been with me inevery decision I made.
Talk about shame.
That's where my shame comes from.
Not that other people willfind out or could find out.
I don't think there'sanything left out there.
'cause I put it all out there.
I might as well.
You can go dig in.
I don't care.
I'll gladly talk about itbecause isn't that amazing?
(56:28):
Isn't he amazing?
Look what he's done in my life.
But the knowledge that in those moments,
even if nobody else saw God wassitting right there with me when I
made that decision and that choice.
Every time I took a drink,
(56:52):
that was it right next to me.
Every time I got drunk, everytime I got blacked out drunk,
every time I made the fool out ofmyself, every time I hurt somebody.
Every single time.
Every single time he was right there.
And the part that is the hardestfor me is that the entire time he
(57:17):
was there, he's like, I love you.
I love you.
I'm right here.
I love you.
He never got mad, nevertold me how worthless I was.
That was my own voice in my head.
(57:38):
'cause I didn't listen'cause I didn't believe it.
'cause fear.
It's a powerful weapon.
He will help you withwhatever hard things come.
This is filled with hard thingsthat came to people's lives,
(58:02):
filled over and over and over.
And I think it's one of the reasons whyfear and worry is one of the topics.
It talks about hundreds andhundreds and hundreds of times.
Some versions have over500 references to fear.
(58:27):
If things are talked about frequentlyin the Bible, three, four or five, six
times is something to take note of.
It's all to take note of, but hundredsof times that tells me how big fear has
been in people's lives for centuries.
It's not new to us.
We're just unique in the situations thatwe work in and deal with and live in.
(58:56):
Jeremiah 29, 11 through 18,
I know what I'm doing.
I have it all planned out.
Plans to take care ofyou, not abandon you.
(59:18):
Plans to give you the future you hope for.
When you call on me, when youcome and pray to me, I'll listen.
When you come lookingfor me, you'll find me.
Yes.
When you get serious about finding meand you want it more than anything else,
(59:41):
I'll make sure you won't be disappointed.
That's God's decree.
I'll turn things around for you.
I'll bring you back from all thecountries into which I drove you God's
decree and bring you home to the placefrom which I sent you off into exile.
You can count on it.
(01:00:04):
We're often in exile and far off lands.
Think of the journeysour lives have taken.
My drinking, that was my faroff land, that was my exile.
God allowed me to end up there.
He knew where I was gonna end up.
He was right there the whole timejust waiting for me to look at him.
(01:00:26):
But that was my exile.
But for right now, because you'vetaken up with these newfangled
prophets who set themselves up asBabylon specialists, spreading the
(01:00:47):
word, God sent them just for us.
God is setting the records straightAs for the king sitting on David's
throne and all the people left inJerusalem who didn't go into exile with
you, they're facing some bad times.
God of the Angel Army says, watch this.
Catastrophe is on the way.
(01:01:08):
War and hunger disease, there'rea barrel of rotten apples.
I'll rid the country of themthrough war and hunger and disease.
The whole world is going tohold its nose at the smell shut
its eyes at the horrible site.
They'll end up in slung ghettos becausethey wouldn't listen to a thing I
said when I sent my servant prophetspreaching tirelessly and urgently, no,
(01:01:35):
they wouldn't listen to a word I said.
It's kind of an ugly picture of whatcan happen out there in the world, but
it's what happens when we don't listen.
It's what happened to me.
(01:01:55):
Things were stinking tohigh happen in this world.
I was trying to live, you know, Ithought I had a figure, you know,
a good idea of life and what agood plan for life looks like, but
it was a slummy, stinky, smelly,rotten place, all dressed up in a
nice house, in a nice neighborhood.
(01:02:15):
Didn't change what it really was.
All we have to do is listen Inthose times when the anxiety has
taken over and the fear is huge,you don't know where to turn.
And I'm telling you, if you're in earlyrecovery, that happens all the time.
It's a whole new way of living.
How do I do it?
(01:02:37):
How?
Who do I listen to?
Everybody's got advice.
It's gonna happen.
People are in unique andindividual and your journeys are
gonna be unique and individual,but there is one who does know.
But it takes quietness.
It takes a heart to listen.
(01:02:58):
You have to want to hear andyou have to want to follow it,
not only if it's going togive you what you want.
We have to be content with our needs beingmet and looking the way that they do.
Right now, if you can'tbe content right now,
(01:03:23):
ask yourself why?
Because everything you have, everythingI have everything you don't have.
Everything I don't have
is God's decision.
Nothing I did put me here.
(01:03:45):
Nothing.
I can say that for absolute fact.
It was never my intention in this lifetimeto be up here talking on a Sunday morning.
This isn't me.
An outreach center for recovery, huh?
If you thought that in my dreams ofmy retirement years that that was part
(01:04:09):
of it, Uhuh was never on my radar.
But I sat and worried abouthow am I gonna retire?
And that was starting to scare me.
Like, really Eat me up.
'cause you hear the things you needthis much to retire, comfortably have
this and you gotta plan for this.
And then, I mean every, I mean,I'm getting to where I have to
(01:04:31):
try and pick apart the medic.
I'm like, do I want A, do I want B?
Is it gonna cover this?
Is it gonna, there's so many thingsand I was so filled with worry.
But if we live the God planned way, trustand being grateful and thankful for here
and now, knowing that he has a plan,knowing that every need will be met.
(01:04:58):
And remembering that needsare very different than wants.
Let go of your wants.
Just let 'em all go.
Are your needs met?
Everybody here is wearing clothes.
So that room was met.
Nobody looks like they're skeletaland haven't eaten in weeks.
Those needs were met.
(01:05:23):
There's more than one person in here.
The need for community was met.
God meets needs.
Always the anxiety and the fear.
(01:05:43):
It is a hard thing for me whenI sit in my anxiety and fear.
'cause it's like, where's my trust?
God, I made a promise to you andI failed again because I'm scared.
I don't see your plan and it's hardfor me to trust you right now, but I
want you, it's okay to tell God that.
I want you to know that come to God asyou are in every bit of your brokenness.
(01:06:10):
And just put it out there.
If you need examples of it, getinto some of David Sounds and
listen to how he talked to God.
Everything from broken on hisface in the dirt tear covered in
brokenness to literally shakinghis fist at God in making demands.
(01:06:33):
That's the God we can go to.
God says we can try him.
I promised test me.
'cause he is never failed.
If he says your needsare met, I will provide.
He's not a liar.
(01:06:53):
Sometimes that voice though that we hearmakes us look at it as if it's a lie.
Because why am I living herethen if you're taking care of me,
but you're living someplace.
Right.
(01:07:15):
I am envious at times of peoplethat live very simple, basic lives
in those third world countries.
And, um,
because I think it's easier to find yourjoy, I think it's easier to be happy.
The kids don't sit thereon tablets and technology.
They're not worried aboutsmartphones or cell tower reception.
(01:07:36):
They're not worried about getting theirhouse repainted in the color of the year.
For Sherwin Williams, they're not wearingthe latest and greatest of fashion.
They're not paying a fortunefor their shoes, none of it.
They send their kids off, whoknows how far to get water.
They try to scratch up some fruit fromthe thing, and they live in these joyful
(01:07:58):
communities of laughter and happiness,thankful for what they've been given.
And there's beauty in that kind of a life.
Anxiety doesn't.
Consume them.
And it's funny how having everythingwe want leads us only to more
worry and fear and anxiety.
(01:08:24):
Think the end.
You're probably going, thank goodness,how long are you gonna talk about this?
But this is a big topic and it's,
it's just gonna be part of life.
And it becomes a choice of handing itto God who knows what to do with it.
Or you can sit and hang on it andcontinue to spin and worry and be
(01:08:48):
fearful, but you don't have to.
So I'm asking you please, if thatconsumes you, if you walked in carrying
that, there's plenty of room up here.
Just leave it, leave it, give itto God and tell him you're done.
'cause he knows what to do with it.
And I promise you.
(01:09:10):
He will do what he will do.
Just trust him.
Thank you.
We're gonna finish with, um, onelast song and then we'll pray
and then we're going to eat good.
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