In this week's episode, I share with you an interview I did on the Go Be Great podcast with Becca Dicicco, where I share my personal journey - from grappling with societal beauty standards as a teenager, embarking on a weight loss journey, to nurturing a renewed perspective post-parenthood - the common thread: grace, compassion, and acceptance.
Listen to more episodes of Becca's show here.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to the Balance and Bliss podcast.
I'm your host, andrea Mondu, athree-time published author,
speaker and a lifestyletransformation coach who
believes everyone should begiven the gift of knowing how to
live their lives feelinghealthy and empowered.
Things like moving your bodyregularly and feeling it well,
taking care of your mind,setting boundaries, practicing
(00:23):
self and body, acceptance,personal growth, manifestation
and everything in between.
This is not linear and it's notjust one thing.
It expands into so many areasand on this show we're going to
talk about just that.
We're all striving to live alittle more healthy and a little
more well, but what does thateven mean?
(00:43):
My goal is to help you see thatyou can move from the mundane
to the magic when it comes toliving aligned and fulfilled,
and by tuning in each week youcan be assured you'll leave with
nuggets of wisdom that you canimplement into your day to day,
like right now, to help youmaximize your health, wellness
(01:04):
and your life.
Now let's dive in.
Hey, welcome back to anotherepisode of the Balance and Bliss
podcast.
I hope you have been having anexcellent summer and also that
you've been enjoying all of thereplays and the re-releases that
(01:25):
I have been sharing with you,with a few nuggets of new
episodes in there.
I have been having a really busy, really filling, really
kick-ass summer.
Back at the end of June, when Ishared kind of what some of my
summer plans were and how it waslike a reclaiming of the summer
.
I really feel like it has beenthat I have spent so much time
(01:47):
by the water.
I have spent so much time doingthings with friends and with
family and just really soakingin all of the moments that I can
have with both of the girlshome with me over the summer.
If you follow me over onInstagram, at the beginning or
at the end of July I shared thatEloise is going to be starting
daycare, or had started daycaresome sporadic days over the
(02:10):
summer, and we're really closinglike one chapter, one season of
our lives and moving into thenext one.
I have a lot of feelings aroundthat, mostly positive, though
it's just like you know,whenever you're in the throes of
something that's really reallytough, oftentimes it's like oh
(02:30):
my gosh, I feel like this isgoing to go on forever, like I
don't know if I can do this, howam I going to be able to get up
for another day?
And you know there's a lot ofchanges and challenges that come
with navigating a new baby anda second child, growing your
family, figuring out all ofthose transitions and all of
(02:50):
those adjustments, and then, ontop of that, you know, managing
the podcast and the business andlike, what is my life going to
look like and how do I want tocreate?
You know our days once thegirls get older and how
available do I want to be.
Like I was having all of thesebig moments of feeling like what
(03:13):
you know, what am I doing andwhat do I want my life to look
like.
And so it was a lot.
But of course, you know, nowwe're on the other side of that
and the summer is ending andschool is going to be back in
session soon.
Everybody's going to be gettingonto like a little bit of
routine.
That's one thing that I reallycrave for near the end of the
(03:34):
summer is I'm like, okay, I'mready for the free, for all to
be done.
I'm looking forward to routinesand schedules and dedicated
work time and all those things.
You know, as much as it's niceto have late nights and be going
this place and that place, ourbodies really thrive on routine
(03:56):
and predictability, and you knowmy body is asking me for, for
that routine.
So, you know, take a minute andthink about what your body might
be asking you for as you'relistening to this episode today.
You know thinking about how hasthe last week been for you, how
has the last month been for you.
(04:17):
Have you taken a moment to sit,close your eyes, and maybe you
do that right now.
You sit, you close your eyesand you can almost do a little
bit of a body scan.
How is your body feeling?
Are there any parts of you thatare tight?
Are you wearing your shouldersas earrings, as my massage
(04:37):
therapist has said to me before,can you relax those shoulders?
Is there any tension in anypart of your body?
What's going on in your mindright now?
And maybe you can't siftthrough all of that in this
moment, but taking some time tosift through what's going on in
your mind, what is weighing youdown, what thoughts are going on
(04:57):
that are no longer serving you,these regular check ins can be
really helpful in kind ofkeeping that homeostasis and
that stability that our nervoussystems are looking for.
Back in July we went on a week'svacation.
It was in the middle of Julyand in the middle of two
birthdays.
(05:17):
So both of the girls have abirthday early July, or the 14th
and the 29th, and our cottageweekend was smack dab, or
cottage week, rather, was smackdab in the middle of that and my
brain was going 100 times aminute during that leading up to
the cottage.
All the things that I have todo for the parties, all the
(05:40):
things that I have to like packand bring and make sure we have,
plus all the stuff that I hadgoing on at that time.
I just finished up or was justfinishing up, rather my bare
coaching certification and so Iwas going through class twice a
week at that time, obviouslydoing the homework, making sure
that I'm getting my coachinghours in, like a shit ton of
(06:02):
stuff.
And I remember the night beforewe went up to the cottage
feeling like really wound upOnce we were driving up there,
I'm like going through the did.
I forget anything?
Do I have everything?
Did I turn off all the things?
Did I give all the instructions?
Going through all those thingsin your mind.
Once we got up there, we started, you know, we unpacked, we saw
(06:25):
the water.
There's something for me I saidthis before, but there's
something for me about beingnear the water.
It just really brings me downto a place of calm.
And so, as each day went by atthe cottage, I almost felt like
my nervous system was slowlycalming down, like my
(06:46):
sympathetic nervous system waslike we've been running on this
for so long, and theparasympathetic system was like
it's okay, I've got this whereI'm coming in Listen, I'm coming
, I've got this.
And by the end of that weekvacation, there was so much like
chill and calm in my body.
I feel like I've still kind ofcarried that through.
(07:08):
And so if we don't allowourselves the time to take a
minute and check in with ourbody, with our mind, with how
many things are spinning inthere, if we actually can bring
our body to a place of calm,then we're never really able to
get there right Because we'renot being intentional and we're
(07:28):
living on that autopilot which Italk often about.
So, anyway, all that to say,this was supposed to be an intro
for today's episode and it is,but I just wanted to throw that
in here for you.
So today's episode is aninterview actually with that I
did on another show.
So my friend Becca she's also aco-author in Body Bliss Book
Two and she is the host of theGo Be Great podcast Her and I
(07:53):
talked on our on our show hey,becca, it's our show together
now Her and I talked on her showa little bit about my journey,
a little bit about body image,and we talked about mermaids
randomly, but we had a reallygreat conversation about being
at home in your skin, what thatcan look like, all the
(08:14):
influences on the exterior, andI wanted to share that with you
today.
So, without further ado, hereis the interview of me on the Go
Be Great podcast.
I really hope you enjoy it.
It was really great to talk toyou today and I will catch you
next week.
I hope you enjoy.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
I'm Becca and this is the podcast.
Go Be Great.
There's no such thing as TMIhere, so let's chat, meet
amazing humans and haveconversations about life,
confidence and more, without thefilter.
Come hang weekly as I shedlight on the topics we often
feel we need to hide, as wecelebrate the ebbs and flows of
learning what being great reallylooks like.
(08:53):
Buckle up Buttercups and let'sgo be great together.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
This show is brought to you by Female Alliance Media,
by women for women.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Hello, hello, welcome back.
I am so excited for thisepisode, so we are just going to
put on our little swim gogglesand dive right in, because I
know that you guys probablyalready saw my stories.
This week we are talking toAndrea Mondu, author of you
Actually Can Do this, leadauthor of the bestselling Body
Bliss book series.
She is a speaker.
(09:23):
She's the podcast host of theBalance and Bliss podcast.
One of the founders of FemaleAlliance Media.
Let's give a round of applause.
I loved adding that last one inthere.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
You know what I actually like?
I don't know why I just it'salmost like a separate identity.
I don't like really talk aboutit in like my Balance and Bliss
space.
But yeah, no big deal.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
Huge deal.
We're going to get into that ina second.
I had to ask some fun questionsjust to get the party started,
and these came about either on aTikTok feed or just life, and I
actually saved them because Ifeel like you would have really
good answers for this.
Okay, number one do you believethat mermaids are real?
(10:13):
Yes, okay, follow up.
I was hoping you were going tosay yes.
Do you think they are evil?
Speaker 1 (10:21):
Okay, First of all, I have to say literally yesterday
I went to see the new littlemermaid that just came out and
yeah, have you seen it yet?
Speaker 2 (10:30):
No, but I've heard amazing things.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
It was so good I was like crying Okay.
So that was like my favoritemovie growing up.
I had like flashbacks.
When you asked me that questionof like when I was a kid, I
would like glue my legs togetherin my mind in the pool and I
would pretend I was a mermaid.
You know how you like flip yourlegs and like sit up on the
side and like do the thing withthe tail.
So obviously they're real andyes, the movie was fucking
(10:55):
fantastic.
No, I do not think they areevil.
I think they are misunderstood.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
What are these siren sounds?
Have you seen these videos, bythe way?
Speaker 1 (11:04):
No, I don't have TikTok.
Well, I shouldn't say that Idon't go on TikTok I have it,
but I don't go on it.
Okay, I'm going to send youthem.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
Just so you can see it.
It's this.
It's this guy who's on asailboat I don't maybe not a
sailboat, he's in a some type ofboat in the middle of the ocean
late at night and he'srecording a video and all of a
sudden you hear these sounds,like it sounds like somebody, a
woman, yelling, and so he's likewait, did you guys hear that?
And he keeps recording and helike shows it out and on both
(11:33):
sides of the boat there's likesomething on either side of the
boat jump like swimming and liketalking to him and like it
sounds like an echoey voice.
It's the creepiest thing.
But they say that like themermaids, like lower sailboat,
like sailmen I don't know whatthe word is in the middle of the
night Miller sure Sounds greatIn the middle of the night and
(11:53):
like lures them in and then likeattacks them and like takes
them down to their lair.
What?
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Okay, yeah, I don't.
I know none of this.
I know the little mermaid andAriel, and she's wonderful.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Yes, I didn't learn this until like literally last
week and I like wrote that downbecause I was like, oh,
definitely going to ask Andreathis one.
Oh yeah, I mean these videos.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
I'm curious.
I'm going to ask Mike if everI'm like not sure about
something or like if I'm hearingyou know random stories about
things going on in the world, Ialways like send them to Mike
for, like, I vet them throughhim.
I'm like what do you thinkabout this?
Is this real, is this not real?
And then he like talks me offthe anxious ledge.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Oh good conspiracy theories.
I would love to hear his whathe thinks about mermaids being
evil or not.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
I will ask him.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
What are your last three Google searches, if you
will be so brave as to bringthem up.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Yeah, I totally will.
Crockpot healthy recipes.
Cute Dr Callflesh.
What is my dentist?
I need to reach digital Clara'sappointment.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
Oh, the last name is Callflesh.
I was like oh, are we gettinginto cannibalism already?
Speaker 1 (13:04):
No, when I said flesh I thought you meant other type
of fallatio.
That's even better.
And then the other one is 777,angel number meeting.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Oh, what is the meaning?
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Mike, mr Logical Brain Mike's my husband, by the
way, for anyone who's listeningmy lovely partner.
He is like super, not into likewitchy stuff, as he calls it,
but he literally sent me apicture of his odometer today
and it was like 777777.
And then the picture said whatdoes this mean?
So I looked it up for him andit means seeing 7777, or 7777 is
(13:42):
your guardian angel's way oftelling you to stay strong and
to continue moving forward onyour journey, even through
changes and obstacles.
The path ahead can becomechallenging, but the message is
to keep a positive outlook inorder to overcome anything.
Ooh, dig it.
Yeah, I did.
And then he didn't respond tome for the rest of the day.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Way to go, Mike.
Everything's okay.
By the way, you need to checkback in after that.
Oh my gosh.
Okay, that actually really wentbeautifully into my final
question.
Do you have any full moonroutines or like rituals that
you do?
Speaker 1 (14:20):
I love the full moon.
I fully believe in full moonrituals.
Do I always do them?
No, like there was just a fullmoon this past Saturday and I
looked at it when I let the dogout and I was like, oh, that's
really nice, and then I didn'tdo anything else, but I posted
full moon events in the past.
So like I'm all over thespectrum in terms of how I
(14:43):
harness that full moon energy.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Yeah, I love that.
I think it's fascinating andI'm so into it.
I also really am envious of thewomen whose cycles are in
alignment with the phases of themoon.
That would be cool, yeah, and Ijust I've been seeing again
another thing all over theinternet about how, like all of
(15:07):
these very intuitive souls andlike mediums or spirit, like
psychics and stuff like this,are all of their cycles, who are
in line with the moon, aresuddenly shifting out and
they're like wondering why.
And there's a bunch of researchbehind that.
I really need to go offconspiracy theory TikTok, but I
just thought it was fascinatingand I was like, oh, my little
(15:27):
witchy girl, I know she's gonnahave Of course.
Speaker 1 (15:31):
I must say, though, on Saturday, mike and I had a
little tiff and I, before I wentto bed, I literally said to
myself I was like, and I amreleasing this fucking
discussion with the full moon.
So I did do that.
The full moon is all aboutreleasing, and the new moon is
calling in.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Yeah, oh, okay, that's a good thing to release.
Sometimes that's all it takes,right?
All right, well, that was allmy fun questions.
Now we're going to get down tobusiness.
Okay, so I feel like there isso many we could.
I could have you back on herefor like 17 episodes, because
there's so many differentavenues that we could like
really lube up and dive into.
But for starters, tell us aboutyour relationship with your
(16:11):
body.
What has that looked like overtime?
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Oh, my, okay.
So the way, the relationshipthat I've had with my body over
time I'll tell you, the firstthing that's coming to mind for
me right now is like this reallybig shift that I had with the
way that it's almost like therewas a very definitive like
before children and afterchildren.
For me, in terms of like theway that I accept and view the
(16:40):
skin that I'm in, historicallyit hasn't really been the
greatest.
I am somebody who is as per theideal standard of beauty not
quite that.
So I'm really tall, I'm likealmost six feet, and I am like
big, boned, curvy, mid-size is aterm that I've heard people use
(17:05):
that I can kind of likeidentify with mid and like plus
size.
Like I.
The most recent pair of likegene shorts that I bought were a
20.
So like I'm definitely don'tshop, can't shop everywhere
necessarily, and so I obviously,as do a lot of women or girls
at a young age like notice thatI was different from people
(17:28):
around me.
I couldn't like share clotheswith my friends and all that
kind of stuff.
Right, it's like, oh my gosh,let's all get together and like
share clothes and stuff, and I'mlike, oh cool, or like do you
remember?
Did you guys have a garageclothing at your in the States?
No, so it's like a teeny bopper, it's kind of like a forever 21
, like dynamite kind of store.
(17:48):
Do you have dynamite Anyway?
Speaker 2 (17:50):
No, but that would be like our limited too.
I'm getting that vibe.
Yeah, like real bubble gumgirly.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Yes, and so those were like the stores that we
were shopping at when I was ateenager and they only went up
to like a size 13.
And I have like very like Ihave a narrow, narrow waist but
a very wide bootay, which I lovenow, but I was like I hated it
back then because I was liketrying on the size 13 jeans and
(18:15):
I could barely do them up, orlike my butt crack was hanging
out or like you get like themuffin top, and I was so
insecure about like all of thatand I just I was different,
right, I just I felt different.
And so you know, I rememberthere was this one like a
monumental moment for me when Iwas in college, where this was
early on in the relationshipthat I have with Mike now that
(18:38):
was a weird way of saying that,but anyway.
And I remember, like you know,looking at myself in the mirror,
stepping on the scale andfeeling like just absolutely
devastated with the number thatI saw, with the way I felt in my
skin, and I just was likereally tied to this number and
how unworthy I was.
And you know, like why wouldMike ever want to be with
(19:01):
somebody like me, like all thiskind of stuff.
So, as most people do before, Ithink they like wake up to
there's more than just needingto lose weight.
I went on a weight loss journey.
I was like, listen, if I canlose weight then I'm gonna feel
better about myself.
And I did.
I did, when I lost the weight,like let's be honest, you get
(19:21):
all the praise from everybody onthe outside and it was great.
And then I peed on a stick andI found out I was pregnant and
my first thought was, oh my gosh, I'm gonna undo all the hard
work I just did by gettingpregnant and having this baby.
And that's like really shittyto.
(19:42):
You know, when I think back,like that was the first thought
that I had it.
Just, I just feel really sadthat like I thought that.
But of course you know we'reonly as woke as we are, you know
.
So I had Clara and Clara's, myolder daughter, and I was like,
(20:03):
okay, now I can like get thatpre-baby body back and I was
like, wait, like that's, youknow, that's just doesn't like
feel as right anymore and I'mthinking about raising a
daughter and like my internaldialogue, and so when I say
there was like a very distinctlike before and after.
It's because, all of a sudden,I was like, oh shit, like
(20:24):
there's also somebody else thatI'm influencing, and I know the
countless hours that I havewasted wishing that my body was
different, wishing that I couldbe smaller, wishing that I could
be.
I just wish that I was short,like my whole life.
I wished that I was shortbecause, you know, I could was
always scared to wear high heels, for example, if I could find a
(20:47):
fucking shoe size that fit me,cause, again, I'm like an 11
wide, sometimes 12, depending onthe store, and so I just I
didn't want that same type oflike path for Clara, or journey
rather.
So I literally started fakingconfidence.
(21:09):
I was like, oh, I feel good,like I'm happy with my body,
even though, like, deep down, Istill was, you know, struggling
a lot and over time.
I mean Clara is going to beeight soon, and so it definitely
was a slow transition.
Now, you know, if you were toask me how I feel about my body
(21:32):
and the skin that I'm in, I mean, I still have bad body image
days.
That's a mouthful.
But I think that I havepersonally, for me, spent so
much time unpacking andunlearning and like relearning
the ways that you actually cantalk to yourself, that the days
where I do struggle, you know.
(21:53):
Back in February I went toLaVion Rose to get like a little
cutesy lingerie with mypostpartum body and I went in
feeling great and nothing fit mein the store and I left feeling
horrible for a short time butthen I was like no, no, listen,
this doesn't matter what.
They don't have your size here.
Just go to a different store,you know, but those things
(22:15):
historically like have spiraledme.
Oh yes.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
That is that's awful.
And then you kind of have thatmoment where it's like again we
allow myself to feel like it'sfor a minute.
But then it's also thatreminder of that replacement
follow-up thought of okay, it'snot my body's fault, it's the
store's fault Not having mystuff Like it's never our body's
fault.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
Yeah, literally, when I was pregnant, I went to
Walmart to get a bathing suitand I remember being like pumped
because I'd heard that Walmartwas carrying like more diverse
sizing and I was like, yes, likeI can walk, I don't have to go
to a plus size store and spendlike three times as much on a
bathing suit.
Because why?
Why the does that exist, youknow?
(22:59):
And I was like, cool, I'm goingto go into Walmart.
I literally got a three Xbathing suit and the bottoms
were still snug and I was likethis is not a three.
Oops, I just shook my wholetable.
Yeah, she's getting realpassionate guys.
This is not a three X, like,it's just, and again, for people
who haven't like or are stillgoing through the work, because
(23:21):
it takes work and it's constantwork, you know that could be
like really fucking discouragingand that's not fair.
That's not fair.
That like, if you live in abigger body, that you have to
have those experiences whenpeople who are naturally smaller
don't have like this.
Just not fair, right, right.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Absolutely yeah, and not even that.
So like, oh, and you're goingto have to pay X amount more
when really the fabric doesn'tcost that much, and men can walk
around and just know theirmeasurements and go and shop and
get whatever they need.
It's really only women thathave to worry about this weird
sizing thing.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Yeah, I saw that recently on Instagram.
It was like, if your waist isthis, you go into a store as a
man and you buy that size.
Yeah, but like here you're thesize, or the size, or the size.
Like it's wild, it just likeplays into, like the mindset,
which is yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Exactly yes.
So what have you put intopractice postpartum then?
That has helped you connectback with yourself, Cause you
just had baby number two.
Oh my gosh, you make adorablechildren and Clara's like a
little mommy and I just love itso much.
But what have you done roundtwo on this that has maybe
helped you connect now thatyou've learned from Clara?
Speaker 1 (24:37):
Yeah, I think that in the last almost a year like
next month she's going to be ayear which is wild to me.
That is wild, I know.
I know In the last year I thinkthat I have really honed in on,
like, what are the things thatreally allow for me to like be
(24:57):
in this place of like, bliss andacceptance with my body?
And so those three things thathave really allowed me to like
stay in this mindset are grace,compassion and acceptance.
You may have heard me talkabout these things before.
I think that I have spent a lotof time.
You know, you have thosepictures from high school and
(25:18):
you look back at them and you'relike, oh my gosh, like I think
back to when I was in highschool and I had a very
distorted perception of the sizeof my body.
I was relatively slender inhigh school, other than like,
again, hippie, and I had thoselike experiences where I
couldn't shop at stores butcompared to now, like I was
(25:38):
definitely a smaller version ofmyself.
Yet at that point in time I wasstruggling.
But anyway, the whole point ofsaying that these high school
pictures is that, like wesometimes look back on whether
it's high school or, you know,pre-kids or pre-marriage or
pre-whatever it is, and wecompare our now selves to that
(26:01):
other version of ourself and say, well, why can't I do that?
I'm now a failure as a resultof that.
So for me it's like, listen,I've had two children now, so
this body has housed and createdand birthed two people.
Okay, you've made your ownpeople.
(26:21):
It literally made my own people.
And so, being reallycompassionate for myself, for
that and you know, not puttingthese expectations on myself to
show up in the same way that Ishowed up in other seasons so I
give myself a lot of compassionwith you know where I'm at right
(26:42):
now and my resilience aroundthat, showing myself a lot of
grace because, you know, if weare on some sort of wellness
journey or on some sort of pathto be better, we can get really
down on ourselves on the daysthat we struggle, right, and
it's like, oh, you know where'smy motivation, I don't have any
(27:03):
willpower, but like we don'tneed as much willpower as we
just need like grace andcompassion for ourselves.
So those two things have beenreally helpful for me.
And then acceptance is thethird.
One is just like you know, wecan want our bodies to maybe be
different.
Or you know, for me I've beenpretty open in the intro of Body
(27:24):
Bliss, book 2, which are yougonna read really soon?
Speaker 2 (27:28):
Yes, oh my.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
God, oh, my God.
Speaker 2 (27:30):
Today.
Wait, I just realized we'retalking to you guys in the past,
but this episode comes out onlaunch day.
Forgot to say that in thebeginning.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Okay, so in the intro of the book you know I talk
about because I think thatthere's like this misconception
that if you are living in aplace of like acceptance with
your body, then you shouldn'twant to lose weight.
You know what I mean?
And it's like one or the otherFor me.
I'm very much in acceptance ofwhere I'm at right now, but also
(28:00):
I do want to lose some weight,but it's not tied to like
because I want to look better orwhatever.
For me, I notice it in myworkouts, for example.
Or like I'm very flexible but Ican't flex as far as I can with
my stomach in the way, andthat's just the reality of.
But the desire for that doesn'tcome from a place of hate.
(28:24):
It comes from just like hey,this is what I want to be, but
I'm not going to hate on myselfright now, I'm just going to be
in acceptance of like this isthe season that I'm in.
This is one part of my wholelife's journey In that, then, I
just have started until like,just release some of the
pressure that I put on myselfand I'm just leading more with
(28:48):
love for myself and like forthat.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
And it's so hard to do that too, because I feel like
sometimes, when people heargrace or they hear compassion,
they're like oh, but is that thesame thing as an excuse?
Or like are you making anexcuse?
And it's like no, that'sdefinitely not.
And if you are making an excuse, you're not leading with love,
You're not doing all the thingsthat you just explained.
You're not coming from a placeof desire based on aesthetics.
(29:15):
It's just based on how you wantto show up and live life, and
those are two very differentthings.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
I also don't want my knee to hurt as much while I'm
running.
Like you know, there's thesethings that I know that like,
anyway, yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
Yeah, exactly, it's all about the root of it all and
being really honest withyourself about that too, cause I
know I tried to like mask thatfor a while too and be like oh,
I just want this, I just want itto be because I want to take
care of myself when really likeno, that wasn't what you were
really doing.
Like you have to like really beable to catch your own shit.
Yeah, and you've got to digdeep.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
You got to dig deep, cause it's really like we get so
good at lying to ourselves Ifwe don't check ourselves.
Do you know what I mean?
Like you got to really check.
You got to be willing to askyourself the hard questions
instead of living on theautopilot, you know?
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Yes, oh my gosh, that's so.
Yes, so has all of this I'massuming.
Correct me if I'm wronginspired this career path for
you.
What, like, really made youwant to just go and be all the
things and do all of the things,write all the books, speak at
all of the speaking engagementsand all of the above?
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Well, multiple things .
The first is that I am a helper, like by nature.
At my, like, absolute core, Ijust have this innate desire to
help people.
So before I had this careerpath and passion, I was in
social services.
So I worked frontline, crisiswork, like always doing the
(30:48):
helping stuff yeah, I don't knowwhy, Like I just was really
attracted to crisis.
So, like mental health, I waslike the hoarding person for our
region for a really long time,Just like you know the really
the really heavy stuff thatother people didn't necessarily
want to help these folks I did.
Then, when I started to do myown healing, I just felt
(31:11):
inspired to be the person thatmy past self needed for other
people going forward.
When I was in college, I had tochange my email, I remember, and
I needed a professional email.
I changed it to my name andthen had the option to create an
(31:33):
email signature.
In that email signature I put aquote.
That quote is still to this day, like 16 years later, the quote
that I live by, and that is bethe change that you want to see
in the world.
Every single thing that I do isdriven by this desire to create
(31:55):
impact for other people and bethe person that I needed 16
years ago, when I was sitting onthe edge of my bed sobbing,
thinking I was disgusting andunworthy and all that.
I sometimes think if I could goback and talk to that
20-year-old girl, I would giveher so much healing.
(32:18):
I would hope to anyway.
Instead, I'm just talking toeverybody else About breaking
down all the shit that we thinkthat wellness is, but instead
spreading the word about whatwellness actually is.
What it actually is.
It's not talking shit toyourself every single day when
(32:41):
you get up and look in themirror.
It's looking at yourself andbeing like you're awesome, you
did a really great job today.
You've got this.
I know this is going to be hard, but you've got this Insert.
Whatever this thing is, it's somuch more than simply now, mind
you, how you fuel your vesseland how you move your body super
(33:04):
important.
That is absolutely a part ofwellness, but it's such a small
fraction yet we are sohyper-focused on those two
things.
I've just realized that morepeople need to lean into
spirituality, lean into positivecoping strategies for when shit
(33:29):
gets handed to us, because youcan do all the work in the world
and shit is still going to gethanded to you.
If you've really developed astrong, solid internal
foundation and compass to dealwith all the shit that you get,
it just helps you to movethrough it more quickly or it
allows for you to again becompassionate with yourself when
you're going through this stuff.
(33:50):
It's about so much more.
I'm like anybody got a mic thatI can tell that to.
You're going to listen?
Cool, I'm here for it.
Amazing.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Yes, Give me the mic.
The ultimate mic drop momentscome from the end of those
things.
Oh my gosh, I love that mindsetof I just want to speak,
healing, not necessarily speakfrom any other notice me, or I
know all these things.
So here we talk.
It truly comes from a place ofhealing and helping people.
(34:22):
I think that's why we connectso much too, because I'm very
much a helper.
So just people helping people,helpers helping out first.
Speaker 1 (34:29):
Yeah, exactly that's why the idea for the books came.
That's literally where the ideafor the books came from I was
just thinking about.
So I was in one of Courtney'sco-author projects at the
beginning of the pandemic 2020,she did a co-author project
called Five Lessons Learned inMotherhood.
(34:50):
So in your chapter you put thefive lessons that you learned as
a mother.
It was cool.
It was like 15, five lessons.
Whatever 15 times five is,somebody can do the math on that
.
I teach reading.
Yeah, carry, the one I don'tknow.
So after we had our book launch, I was like, oh my gosh, you
remember Chicken Soup for theSoul?
(35:11):
I was like that's what thesebooks reminded me of.
I don't think I have ever reada book that has 15 people, or
nine people, saying, hey, thisis how I felt about my body or
this is what I've experienced inthe world that I've lived in as
it relates to how my body is inthis world.
(35:32):
But how healing would it be foryou and I to open up a book and
be like, oh my gosh, I'mgetting chills right now how
this person has been through,whatever it is Me too.
There's so much power in sayingme too.
So I went to Courtney and I waslike, hey, what do you think
about this?
(35:52):
She was like, hey, I reallylike that idea.
Like let's put it out into theworld and see what other people
think about it.
I had the first project filledin a month.
Wow, 15 authors, just like I'mgoing to share, I'm going to
share, I'm going to share, I'mgoing to share.
And it was such a beautifulprocess.
And when launch came about, Iwas like, oh no, I'm sad it's
(36:13):
over and like there's morestories to be shared, and so we
done it all over again.
And now here we are, like somany people talk about how
they've been impacted by bodybliss, even like I'm having
conversations in my DMs rightnow with people who are asking
about book three and they'relike I read book one and it was
so great and I can't wait forbook two to come out and like
(36:34):
it's just, it's really cool tosee like the ripple effects of
what the authors are making.
Because, yes, I have.
I've had the idea for theproject, I've pulled it together
, I'm the lead author, but I'monly one story.
There's so many other peoplethat have shown up for
themselves and shown up forothers.
You included in like sharing apiece of your story, a piece of
(36:56):
your heart, with other people sothat they can feel more
connected unless alone.
Speaker 2 (37:03):
Yes, that drive and that mission for connection, I
think, is what really.
I didn't even have to thinktwice, I said yes and then, like
clenched my butt later about it, but like it was just that
innate feeling of like this is,this is immediately right, and
my nervous system, like my wholebody, was just telling me yes,
from the beginning of it all.
So I really just followed thatand I think that it is really
(37:26):
brave for women to be sharingtheir stories and because it
does create that connection,when you feel like you're
there's been things that I'vewritten down in our chapter that
I have been like, oh man, is itjust me that has felt this way?
And I'm like, no, absolutelynot, there's not, there's not,
never going to be that, andthere's so many different
stories so there's not really away that you can't.
You're either connecting oryou're learning.
(37:47):
You're either connecting oryou're opening your mind and
opening your heart and you'rerealizing that like wow, this is
not a me issue, and it onceagain will hopefully help other
women realize that it was neverme, it was never my body's fault
and this is all why, like allof these lived experiences, Well
, in this book, for example, wehave somebody sharing in their
(38:07):
chapter about, like skinbleaching, where, like people,
where people around her werebleaching their skin so that
they felt like they could fit inand like that was.
Speaker 1 (38:18):
You know, that was something that was new to me.
I didn't realize that that wasyou know lengths that people
were going to, but it just goesto show you, like, you know, all
of these things exist in theshadows and until we shine the
light in those corners, we, wereally don't realize what's
going on.
And so it's just like, sobeautiful to be able to like,
(38:40):
and let me tell you so, fromthis day forward, it's going to
make your day when somebodysends you a DM and says, hey, I
just finished reading yourchapter and what you said, like
really resonated with me.
I think that's one of thecoolest feedback that I've
gotten from like the first booksauthors.
It's is they're like.
I'm getting a lot of messagesfrom people that I know, but
also people that I don't know,who, like, have the book and,
(39:04):
you know, have read my story andfelt so compelled to reach out
to me and tell me how much thatimpact.
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Yes, which really is just like the why behind it all,
like you just want to help thatand spread that healing and
that connection.
So I can, only I can't wait tolike not that I can't wait to
have you DM me, but I just can'twait to like have the book in
everybody's hands, to likereally connect with all of these
amazing humans that are in thisbook.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
Listen, if you haven't so powerful Sorry, I was
just was like if you haven'tordered your copy already or if
you haven't pre-ordered, well,listen, message Becca and get
one, because it's going to be,it's going to be great.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
It is.
It really is so because Ididn't log into the right Zoom
account.
We only have a few minutes left, but I do want to know what
advice would you give somebodywho's trying to build a better
relationship with themselves.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
I think that.
So I'm currently reading a bookright now and I'm actually in a
certification program for thebear coaching.
I don't know if anyonelistening to this is familiar
with Susan Hyatt.
She's also anti-diet and I'mloving it.
One of the things that she saidthat was really the catalyst
for her journey and I think isso beautiful and I've been
(40:21):
sharing it with my clients andmy people is that if you're
feeling really overwhelmed withwhere you're at, with the
relationship with your body orthe way that you're talking to
yourself, tomorrow morning whenyou wake up, just start to think
about all of the decisions thatyou're making in a day,
including the things that you'resaying to yourself on that day,
(40:42):
and start to think about howcan you lead with love I said
this a little bit earlier on,but not how can you love
yourself more, but everydecision that you're making,
everything that you're saying toyourself, how can you start to
shift to love type of decisions?
I'll give you an example.
If you're sitting down to likewatch I'm pointing at my TV.
(41:03):
Nobody can see.
If you're sitting down to likewatch Netflix at the end of the
night or something like that,are you going to watch like some
show that's going to give youlike so much anxiety before you
close your eyes?
Or are you going to like watchsomething that's like going to
make you feel good and thenmaybe that will solve the issues
that you have with sleeping?
(41:23):
Or, like you know, there's somany.
Even like when you're eatingsomething that you really enjoy,
that's like a guilty pleasureor whatever, like enjoy it, but
don't eat so much of it thatyour body is like hurting.
After you know that, like yourstomach is just like feels like
it's going to explode and you'relike, oh my God, I'm in so much
pain.
Just like think about all thosesmall things you can do to lead
(41:46):
with love and sorry, this is areally long answer.
I love it Meeting it up andalso just take it one day at a
time, because what you're doingis you're literally creating new
neural pathways.
That shit doesn't happenovernight.
You're undoing years and yearsand years of programming and if
(42:06):
you, if you, slip up, it'sfucking going to happen and it's
okay.
And you need to becompassionate with yourself in
those moments.
Give yourself some grace andthen just put one foot in front
of the other.
Speaker 2 (42:19):
Oh my, again Mike dropped.
Do we see why?
She's a speaker?
Guys, Put her in front of anytype of Mike, whether it's the
one she's sitting at right nowor on a stage somewhere.
That was so good.
Oh my God, I love that.
Yes, lead with love.
Find a way to choose love orchoose you throughout the day
and those little moments,because that really is where it
all happens, guys.
Speaker 1 (42:40):
Yeah, it's little moments every day.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
Yeah, Well, where can we find you on the socials and
all of you who want todefinitely join book three after
reading and listening to this?
Reading this podcast, listeningto this podcast?
Speaker 1 (42:54):
By the way, reading podcast number four on my Google
searches was how to transcribemy podcast for free.
Oh, there you go.
That's a good one, because Idream of like a anyway like a
blog file podcast.
So I am balance bliss oneverything.
So on Instagram I'm the balancebliss.
As you mentioned earlier, it'sthe balance bliss podcast.
My website is the balance blissdot CA.
(43:16):
Everything balance bliss andyeah.
Speaker 2 (43:22):
I love it.
Thank you so much for beinghere.
I know that there's going to betidbits, especially from the
mamas of the crew that are justgoing to love and get some
advice from you, and I thinkthat that's so important to do,
I hope so.
Guys, tune in next week.
Happy launch day.
Cheers to that.
Shake your ass.
Speaker 1 (43:41):
Go be great.
Shake your ass.
Go be great, yes.
Speaker 2 (43:45):
I love it.
Oh, my God.
Speaker 1 (43:56):
Thanks so much for being here.
I hope you're leaving with afull heart, some inspiration, or
you're feeling the kick in thebutt you felt like you needed.
If you really enjoyed thisepisode, be sure to share it
with a friend or let me knowRates, reviews, subscribing and
sharing are all great ways tosupport the show and if you want
to stay in touch, follow meover on Instagram at
(44:17):
thebalancebliss.
Thanks for listening today andstay well.
Welcome to the Balance and Bliss podcast.
I'm your host, andrea Mondu, athree-time published author,
speaker and a lifestyletransformation coach who
believes everyone should begiven the gift of knowing how to
live their lives feelinghealthy and empowered.
Things like moving your bodyregularly and feeling it well,
taking care of your mind,setting boundaries, practicing
(00:23):
self and body, acceptance,personal growth, manifestation
and everything in between.
This is not linear and it's notjust one thing.
It expands into so many areasand on this show we're going to
talk about just that.
We're all striving to live alittle more healthy and a little
more well, but what does thateven mean?
(00:43):
My goal is to help you see thatyou can move from the mundane
to the magic when it comes toliving aligned and fulfilled,
and by tuning in each week youcan be assured you'll leave with
nuggets of wisdom that you canimplement into your day to day,
like right now, to help youmaximize your health, wellness
(01:04):
and your life.
Now let's dive in.
Hey, welcome back to anotherepisode of the Balance and Bliss
podcast.
I hope you have been having anexcellent summer and also that
you've been enjoying all of thereplays and the re-releases that
(01:25):
I have been sharing with you,with a few nuggets of new
episodes in there.
I have been having a really busy, really filling, really
kick-ass summer.
Back at the end of June, when Ishared kind of what some of my
summer plans were and how it waslike a reclaiming of the summer
.
I really feel like it has beenthat I have spent so much time
(01:47):
by the water.
I have spent so much time doingthings with friends and with
family and just really soakingin all of the moments that I can
have with both of the girlshome with me over the summer.
If you follow me over onInstagram, at the beginning or
at the end of July I shared thatEloise is going to be starting
daycare, or had started daycaresome sporadic days over the
(02:10):
summer, and we're really closinglike one chapter, one season of
our lives and moving into thenext one.
I have a lot of feelings aroundthat, mostly positive, though
it's just like you know,whenever you're in the throes of
something that's really reallytough, oftentimes it's like oh
(02:30):
my gosh, I feel like this isgoing to go on forever, like I
don't know if I can do this, howam I going to be able to get up
for another day?
And you know there's a lot ofchanges and challenges that come
with navigating a new baby anda second child, growing your
family, figuring out all ofthose transitions and all of
(02:50):
those adjustments, and then, ontop of that, you know, managing
the podcast and the business andlike, what is my life going to
look like and how do I want tocreate?
You know our days once thegirls get older and how
available do I want to be.
Like I was having all of thesebig moments of feeling like what
(03:13):
you know, what am I doing andwhat do I want my life to look
like.
And so it was a lot.
But of course, you know, nowwe're on the other side of that
and the summer is ending andschool is going to be back in
session soon.
Everybody's going to be gettingonto like a little bit of
routine.
That's one thing that I reallycrave for near the end of the
(03:34):
summer is I'm like, okay, I'mready for the free, for all to
be done.
I'm looking forward to routinesand schedules and dedicated
work time and all those things.
You know, as much as it's niceto have late nights and be going
this place and that place, ourbodies really thrive on routine
(03:56):
and predictability, and you knowmy body is asking me for, for
that routine.
So, you know, take a minute andthink about what your body might
be asking you for as you'relistening to this episode today.
You know thinking about how hasthe last week been for you, how
has the last month been for you.
(04:17):
Have you taken a moment to sit,close your eyes, and maybe you
do that right now.
You sit, you close your eyesand you can almost do a little
bit of a body scan.
How is your body feeling?
Are there any parts of you thatare tight?
Are you wearing your shouldersas earrings, as my massage
(04:37):
therapist has said to me before,can you relax those shoulders?
Is there any tension in anypart of your body?
What's going on in your mindright now?
And maybe you can't siftthrough all of that in this
moment, but taking some time tosift through what's going on in
your mind, what is weighing youdown, what thoughts are going on
(04:57):
that are no longer serving you,these regular check ins can be
really helpful in kind ofkeeping that homeostasis and
that stability that our nervoussystems are looking for.
Back in July we went on a week'svacation.
It was in the middle of Julyand in the middle of two
birthdays.
(05:17):
So both of the girls have abirthday early July, or the 14th
and the 29th, and our cottageweekend was smack dab, or
cottage week, rather, was smackdab in the middle of that and my
brain was going 100 times aminute during that leading up to
the cottage.
All the things that I have todo for the parties, all the
(05:40):
things that I have to like packand bring and make sure we have,
plus all the stuff that I hadgoing on at that time.
I just finished up or was justfinishing up, rather my bare
coaching certification and so Iwas going through class twice a
week at that time, obviouslydoing the homework, making sure
that I'm getting my coachinghours in, like a shit ton of
(06:02):
stuff.
And I remember the night beforewe went up to the cottage
feeling like really wound upOnce we were driving up there,
I'm like going through the did.
I forget anything?
Do I have everything?
Did I turn off all the things?
Did I give all the instructions?
Going through all those thingsin your mind.
Once we got up there, we started, you know, we unpacked, we saw
(06:25):
the water.
There's something for me I saidthis before, but there's
something for me about beingnear the water.
It just really brings me downto a place of calm.
And so, as each day went by atthe cottage, I almost felt like
my nervous system was slowlycalming down, like my
(06:46):
sympathetic nervous system waslike we've been running on this
for so long, and theparasympathetic system was like
it's okay, I've got this whereI'm coming in Listen, I'm coming
, I've got this.
And by the end of that weekvacation, there was so much like
chill and calm in my body.
I feel like I've still kind ofcarried that through.
(07:08):
And so if we don't allowourselves the time to take a
minute and check in with ourbody, with our mind, with how
many things are spinning inthere, if we actually can bring
our body to a place of calm,then we're never really able to
get there right Because we'renot being intentional and we're
(07:28):
living on that autopilot which Italk often about.
So, anyway, all that to say,this was supposed to be an intro
for today's episode and it is,but I just wanted to throw that
in here for you.
So today's episode is aninterview actually with that I
did on another show.
So my friend Becca she's also aco-author in Body Bliss Book
Two and she is the host of theGo Be Great podcast Her and I
(07:53):
talked on our on our show hey,becca, it's our show together
now Her and I talked on her showa little bit about my journey,
a little bit about body image,and we talked about mermaids
randomly, but we had a reallygreat conversation about being
at home in your skin, what thatcan look like, all the
(08:14):
influences on the exterior, andI wanted to share that with you
today.
So, without further ado, hereis the interview of me on the Go
Be Great podcast.
I really hope you enjoy it.
It was really great to talk toyou today and I will catch you
next week.
I hope you enjoy.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
I'm Becca and this is the podcast.
Go Be Great.
There's no such thing as TMIhere, so let's chat, meet
amazing humans and haveconversations about life,
confidence and more, without thefilter.
Come hang weekly as I shedlight on the topics we often
feel we need to hide, as wecelebrate the ebbs and flows of
learning what being great reallylooks like.
(08:53):
Buckle up Buttercups and let'sgo be great together.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
This show is brought to you by Female Alliance Media,
by women for women.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Hello, hello, welcome back.
I am so excited for thisepisode, so we are just going to
put on our little swim gogglesand dive right in, because I
know that you guys probablyalready saw my stories.
This week we are talking toAndrea Mondu, author of you
Actually Can Do this, leadauthor of the bestselling Body
Bliss book series.
She is a speaker.
(09:23):
She's the podcast host of theBalance and Bliss podcast.
One of the founders of FemaleAlliance Media.
Let's give a round of applause.
I loved adding that last one inthere.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
You know what I actually like?
I don't know why I just it'salmost like a separate identity.
I don't like really talk aboutit in like my Balance and Bliss
space.
But yeah, no big deal.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
Huge deal.
We're going to get into that ina second.
I had to ask some fun questionsjust to get the party started,
and these came about either on aTikTok feed or just life, and I
actually saved them because Ifeel like you would have really
good answers for this.
Okay, number one do you believethat mermaids are real?
(10:13):
Yes, okay, follow up.
I was hoping you were going tosay yes.
Do you think they are evil?
Speaker 1 (10:21):
Okay, First of all, I have to say literally yesterday
I went to see the new littlemermaid that just came out and
yeah, have you seen it yet?
Speaker 2 (10:30):
No, but I've heard amazing things.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
It was so good I was like crying Okay.
So that was like my favoritemovie growing up.
I had like flashbacks.
When you asked me that questionof like when I was a kid, I
would like glue my legs togetherin my mind in the pool and I
would pretend I was a mermaid.
You know how you like flip yourlegs and like sit up on the
side and like do the thing withthe tail.
So obviously they're real andyes, the movie was fucking
(10:55):
fantastic.
No, I do not think they areevil.
I think they are misunderstood.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
What are these siren sounds?
Have you seen these videos, bythe way?
Speaker 1 (11:04):
No, I don't have TikTok.
Well, I shouldn't say that Idon't go on TikTok I have it,
but I don't go on it.
Okay, I'm going to send youthem.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
Just so you can see it.
It's this.
It's this guy who's on asailboat I don't maybe not a
sailboat, he's in a some type ofboat in the middle of the ocean
late at night and he'srecording a video and all of a
sudden you hear these sounds,like it sounds like somebody, a
woman, yelling, and so he's likewait, did you guys hear that?
And he keeps recording and helike shows it out and on both
(11:33):
sides of the boat there's likesomething on either side of the
boat jump like swimming and liketalking to him and like it
sounds like an echoey voice.
It's the creepiest thing.
But they say that like themermaids, like lower sailboat,
like sailmen I don't know whatthe word is in the middle of the
night Miller sure Sounds greatIn the middle of the night and
(11:53):
like lures them in and then likeattacks them and like takes
them down to their lair.
What?
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Okay, yeah, I don't.
I know none of this.
I know the little mermaid andAriel, and she's wonderful.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Yes, I didn't learn this until like literally last
week and I like wrote that downbecause I was like, oh,
definitely going to ask Andreathis one.
Oh yeah, I mean these videos.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
I'm curious.
I'm going to ask Mike if everI'm like not sure about
something or like if I'm hearingyou know random stories about
things going on in the world, Ialways like send them to Mike
for, like, I vet them throughhim.
I'm like what do you thinkabout this?
Is this real, is this not real?
And then he like talks me offthe anxious ledge.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Oh good conspiracy theories.
I would love to hear his whathe thinks about mermaids being
evil or not.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
I will ask him.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
What are your last three Google searches, if you
will be so brave as to bringthem up.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Yeah, I totally will.
Crockpot healthy recipes.
Cute Dr Callflesh.
What is my dentist?
I need to reach digital Clara'sappointment.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
Oh, the last name is Callflesh.
I was like oh, are we gettinginto cannibalism already?
Speaker 1 (13:04):
No, when I said flesh I thought you meant other type
of fallatio.
That's even better.
And then the other one is 777,angel number meeting.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Oh, what is the meaning?
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Mike, mr Logical Brain Mike's my husband, by the
way, for anyone who's listeningmy lovely partner.
He is like super, not into likewitchy stuff, as he calls it,
but he literally sent me apicture of his odometer today
and it was like 777777.
And then the picture said whatdoes this mean?
So I looked it up for him andit means seeing 7777, or 7777 is
(13:42):
your guardian angel's way oftelling you to stay strong and
to continue moving forward onyour journey, even through
changes and obstacles.
The path ahead can becomechallenging, but the message is
to keep a positive outlook inorder to overcome anything.
Ooh, dig it.
Yeah, I did.
And then he didn't respond tome for the rest of the day.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Way to go, Mike.
Everything's okay.
By the way, you need to checkback in after that.
Oh my gosh.
Okay, that actually really wentbeautifully into my final
question.
Do you have any full moonroutines or like rituals that
you do?
Speaker 1 (14:20):
I love the full moon.
I fully believe in full moonrituals.
Do I always do them?
No, like there was just a fullmoon this past Saturday and I
looked at it when I let the dogout and I was like, oh, that's
really nice, and then I didn'tdo anything else, but I posted
full moon events in the past.
So like I'm all over thespectrum in terms of how I
(14:43):
harness that full moon energy.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Yeah, I love that.
I think it's fascinating andI'm so into it.
I also really am envious of thewomen whose cycles are in
alignment with the phases of themoon.
That would be cool, yeah, and Ijust I've been seeing again
another thing all over theinternet about how, like all of
(15:07):
these very intuitive souls andlike mediums or spirit, like
psychics and stuff like this,are all of their cycles, who are
in line with the moon, aresuddenly shifting out and
they're like wondering why.
And there's a bunch of researchbehind that.
I really need to go offconspiracy theory TikTok, but I
just thought it was fascinatingand I was like, oh, my little
(15:27):
witchy girl, I know she's gonnahave Of course.
Speaker 1 (15:31):
I must say, though, on Saturday, mike and I had a
little tiff and I, before I wentto bed, I literally said to
myself I was like, and I amreleasing this fucking
discussion with the full moon.
So I did do that.
The full moon is all aboutreleasing, and the new moon is
calling in.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Yeah, oh, okay, that's a good thing to release.
Sometimes that's all it takes,right?
All right, well, that was allmy fun questions.
Now we're going to get down tobusiness.
Okay, so I feel like there isso many we could.
I could have you back on herefor like 17 episodes, because
there's so many differentavenues that we could like
really lube up and dive into.
But for starters, tell us aboutyour relationship with your
(16:11):
body.
What has that looked like overtime?
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Oh, my, okay.
So the way, the relationshipthat I've had with my body over
time I'll tell you, the firstthing that's coming to mind for
me right now is like this reallybig shift that I had with the
way that it's almost like therewas a very definitive like
before children and afterchildren.
For me, in terms of like theway that I accept and view the
(16:40):
skin that I'm in, historicallyit hasn't really been the
greatest.
I am somebody who is as per theideal standard of beauty not
quite that.
So I'm really tall, I'm likealmost six feet, and I am like
big, boned, curvy, mid-size is aterm that I've heard people use
(17:05):
that I can kind of likeidentify with mid and like plus
size.
Like I.
The most recent pair of likegene shorts that I bought were a
20.
So like I'm definitely don'tshop, can't shop everywhere
necessarily, and so I obviously,as do a lot of women or girls
at a young age like notice thatI was different from people
(17:28):
around me.
I couldn't like share clotheswith my friends and all that
kind of stuff.
Right, it's like, oh my gosh,let's all get together and like
share clothes and stuff, and I'mlike, oh cool, or like do you
remember?
Did you guys have a garageclothing at your in the States?
No, so it's like a teeny bopper, it's kind of like a forever 21
, like dynamite kind of store.
(17:48):
Do you have dynamite Anyway?
Speaker 2 (17:50):
No, but that would be like our limited too.
I'm getting that vibe.
Yeah, like real bubble gumgirly.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Yes, and so those were like the stores that we
were shopping at when I was ateenager and they only went up
to like a size 13.
And I have like very like Ihave a narrow, narrow waist but
a very wide bootay, which I lovenow, but I was like I hated it
back then because I was liketrying on the size 13 jeans and
(18:15):
I could barely do them up, orlike my butt crack was hanging
out or like you get like themuffin top, and I was so
insecure about like all of thatand I just I was different,
right, I just I felt different.
And so you know, I rememberthere was this one like a
monumental moment for me when Iwas in college, where this was
early on in the relationshipthat I have with Mike now that
(18:38):
was a weird way of saying that,but anyway.
And I remember, like you know,looking at myself in the mirror,
stepping on the scale andfeeling like just absolutely
devastated with the number thatI saw, with the way I felt in my
skin, and I just was likereally tied to this number and
how unworthy I was.
And you know, like why wouldMike ever want to be with
(19:01):
somebody like me, like all thiskind of stuff.
So, as most people do before, Ithink they like wake up to
there's more than just needingto lose weight.
I went on a weight loss journey.
I was like, listen, if I canlose weight then I'm gonna feel
better about myself.
And I did.
I did, when I lost the weight,like let's be honest, you get
(19:21):
all the praise from everybody onthe outside and it was great.
And then I peed on a stick andI found out I was pregnant and
my first thought was, oh my gosh, I'm gonna undo all the hard
work I just did by gettingpregnant and having this baby.
And that's like really shittyto.
(19:42):
You know, when I think back,like that was the first thought
that I had it.
Just, I just feel really sadthat like I thought that.
But of course you know we'reonly as woke as we are, you know
.
So I had Clara and Clara's, myolder daughter, and I was like,
(20:03):
okay, now I can like get thatpre-baby body back and I was
like, wait, like that's, youknow, that's just doesn't like
feel as right anymore and I'mthinking about raising a
daughter and like my internaldialogue, and so when I say
there was like a very distinctlike before and after.
It's because, all of a sudden,I was like, oh shit, like
(20:24):
there's also somebody else thatI'm influencing, and I know the
countless hours that I havewasted wishing that my body was
different, wishing that I couldbe smaller, wishing that I could
be.
I just wish that I was short,like my whole life.
I wished that I was shortbecause, you know, I could was
always scared to wear high heels, for example, if I could find a
(20:47):
fucking shoe size that fit me,cause, again, I'm like an 11
wide, sometimes 12, depending onthe store, and so I just I
didn't want that same type oflike path for Clara, or journey
rather.
So I literally started fakingconfidence.
(21:09):
I was like, oh, I feel good,like I'm happy with my body,
even though, like, deep down, Istill was, you know, struggling
a lot and over time.
I mean Clara is going to beeight soon, and so it definitely
was a slow transition.
Now, you know, if you were toask me how I feel about my body
(21:32):
and the skin that I'm in, I mean, I still have bad body image
days.
That's a mouthful.
But I think that I havepersonally, for me, spent so
much time unpacking andunlearning and like relearning
the ways that you actually cantalk to yourself, that the days
where I do struggle, you know.
(21:53):
Back in February I went toLaVion Rose to get like a little
cutesy lingerie with mypostpartum body and I went in
feeling great and nothing fit mein the store and I left feeling
horrible for a short time butthen I was like no, no, listen,
this doesn't matter what.
They don't have your size here.
Just go to a different store,you know, but those things
(22:15):
historically like have spiraledme.
Oh yes.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
That is that's awful.
And then you kind of have thatmoment where it's like again we
allow myself to feel like it'sfor a minute.
But then it's also thatreminder of that replacement
follow-up thought of okay, it'snot my body's fault, it's the
store's fault Not having mystuff Like it's never our body's
fault.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
Yeah, literally, when I was pregnant, I went to
Walmart to get a bathing suitand I remember being like pumped
because I'd heard that Walmartwas carrying like more diverse
sizing and I was like, yes, likeI can walk, I don't have to go
to a plus size store and spendlike three times as much on a
bathing suit.
Because why?
Why the does that exist, youknow?
(22:59):
And I was like, cool, I'm goingto go into Walmart.
I literally got a three Xbathing suit and the bottoms
were still snug and I was likethis is not a three.
Oops, I just shook my wholetable.
Yeah, she's getting realpassionate guys.
This is not a three X, like,it's just, and again, for people
who haven't like or are stillgoing through the work, because
(23:21):
it takes work and it's constantwork, you know that could be
like really fucking discouragingand that's not fair.
That's not fair.
That like, if you live in abigger body, that you have to
have those experiences whenpeople who are naturally smaller
don't have like this.
Just not fair, right, right.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Absolutely yeah, and not even that.
So like, oh, and you're goingto have to pay X amount more
when really the fabric doesn'tcost that much, and men can walk
around and just know theirmeasurements and go and shop and
get whatever they need.
It's really only women thathave to worry about this weird
sizing thing.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Yeah, I saw that recently on Instagram.
It was like, if your waist isthis, you go into a store as a
man and you buy that size.
Yeah, but like here you're thesize, or the size, or the size.
Like it's wild, it just likeplays into, like the mindset,
which is yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Exactly yes.
So what have you put intopractice postpartum then?
That has helped you connectback with yourself, Cause you
just had baby number two.
Oh my gosh, you make adorablechildren and Clara's like a
little mommy and I just love itso much.
But what have you done roundtwo on this that has maybe
helped you connect now thatyou've learned from Clara?
Speaker 1 (24:37):
Yeah, I think that in the last almost a year like
next month she's going to be ayear which is wild to me.
That is wild, I know.
I know In the last year I thinkthat I have really honed in on,
like, what are the things thatreally allow for me to like be
(24:57):
in this place of like, bliss andacceptance with my body?
And so those three things thathave really allowed me to like
stay in this mindset are grace,compassion and acceptance.
You may have heard me talkabout these things before.
I think that I have spent a lotof time.
You know, you have thosepictures from high school and
(25:18):
you look back at them and you'relike, oh my gosh, like I think
back to when I was in highschool and I had a very
distorted perception of the sizeof my body.
I was relatively slender inhigh school, other than like,
again, hippie, and I had thoselike experiences where I
couldn't shop at stores butcompared to now, like I was
(25:38):
definitely a smaller version ofmyself.
Yet at that point in time I wasstruggling.
But anyway, the whole point ofsaying that these high school
pictures is that, like wesometimes look back on whether
it's high school or, you know,pre-kids or pre-marriage or
pre-whatever it is, and wecompare our now selves to that
(26:01):
other version of ourself and say, well, why can't I do that?
I'm now a failure as a resultof that.
So for me it's like, listen,I've had two children now, so
this body has housed and createdand birthed two people.
Okay, you've made your ownpeople.
(26:21):
It literally made my own people.
And so, being reallycompassionate for myself, for
that and you know, not puttingthese expectations on myself to
show up in the same way that Ishowed up in other seasons so I
give myself a lot of compassionwith you know where I'm at right
(26:42):
now and my resilience aroundthat, showing myself a lot of
grace because, you know, if weare on some sort of wellness
journey or on some sort of pathto be better, we can get really
down on ourselves on the daysthat we struggle, right, and
it's like, oh, you know where'smy motivation, I don't have any
(27:03):
willpower, but like we don'tneed as much willpower as we
just need like grace andcompassion for ourselves.
So those two things have beenreally helpful for me.
And then acceptance is thethird.
One is just like you know, wecan want our bodies to maybe be
different.
Or you know, for me I've beenpretty open in the intro of Body
(27:24):
Bliss, book 2, which are yougonna read really soon?
Speaker 2 (27:28):
Yes, oh my.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
God, oh, my God.
Speaker 2 (27:30):
Today.
Wait, I just realized we'retalking to you guys in the past,
but this episode comes out onlaunch day.
Forgot to say that in thebeginning.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Okay, so in the intro of the book you know I talk
about because I think thatthere's like this misconception
that if you are living in aplace of like acceptance with
your body, then you shouldn'twant to lose weight.
You know what I mean?
And it's like one or the otherFor me.
I'm very much in acceptance ofwhere I'm at right now, but also
(28:00):
I do want to lose some weight,but it's not tied to like
because I want to look better orwhatever.
For me, I notice it in myworkouts, for example.
Or like I'm very flexible but Ican't flex as far as I can with
my stomach in the way, andthat's just the reality of.
But the desire for that doesn'tcome from a place of hate.
(28:24):
It comes from just like hey,this is what I want to be, but
I'm not going to hate on myselfright now, I'm just going to be
in acceptance of like this isthe season that I'm in.
This is one part of my wholelife's journey In that, then, I
just have started until like,just release some of the
pressure that I put on myselfand I'm just leading more with
(28:48):
love for myself and like forthat.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
And it's so hard to do that too, because I feel like
sometimes, when people heargrace or they hear compassion,
they're like oh, but is that thesame thing as an excuse?
Or like are you making anexcuse?
And it's like no, that'sdefinitely not.
And if you are making an excuse, you're not leading with love,
You're not doing all the thingsthat you just explained.
You're not coming from a placeof desire based on aesthetics.
(29:15):
It's just based on how you wantto show up and live life, and
those are two very differentthings.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
I also don't want my knee to hurt as much while I'm
running.
Like you know, there's thesethings that I know that like,
anyway, yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
Yeah, exactly, it's all about the root of it all and
being really honest withyourself about that too, cause I
know I tried to like mask thatfor a while too and be like oh,
I just want this, I just want itto be because I want to take
care of myself when really likeno, that wasn't what you were
really doing.
Like you have to like really beable to catch your own shit.
Yeah, and you've got to digdeep.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
You got to dig deep, cause it's really like we get so
good at lying to ourselves Ifwe don't check ourselves.
Do you know what I mean?
Like you got to really check.
You got to be willing to askyourself the hard questions
instead of living on theautopilot, you know?
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Yes, oh my gosh, that's so.
Yes, so has all of this I'massuming.
Correct me if I'm wronginspired this career path for
you.
What, like, really made youwant to just go and be all the
things and do all of the things,write all the books, speak at
all of the speaking engagementsand all of the above?
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Well, multiple things .
The first is that I am a helper, like by nature.
At my, like, absolute core, Ijust have this innate desire to
help people.
So before I had this careerpath and passion, I was in
social services.
So I worked frontline, crisiswork, like always doing the
(30:48):
helping stuff yeah, I don't knowwhy, Like I just was really
attracted to crisis.
So, like mental health, I waslike the hoarding person for our
region for a really long time,Just like you know the really
the really heavy stuff thatother people didn't necessarily
want to help these folks I did.
Then, when I started to do myown healing, I just felt
(31:11):
inspired to be the person thatmy past self needed for other
people going forward.
When I was in college, I had tochange my email, I remember, and
I needed a professional email.
I changed it to my name andthen had the option to create an
(31:33):
email signature.
In that email signature I put aquote.
That quote is still to this day, like 16 years later, the quote
that I live by, and that is bethe change that you want to see
in the world.
Every single thing that I do isdriven by this desire to create
(31:55):
impact for other people and bethe person that I needed 16
years ago, when I was sitting onthe edge of my bed sobbing,
thinking I was disgusting andunworthy and all that.
I sometimes think if I could goback and talk to that
20-year-old girl, I would giveher so much healing.
(32:18):
I would hope to anyway.
Instead, I'm just talking toeverybody else About breaking
down all the shit that we thinkthat wellness is, but instead
spreading the word about whatwellness actually is.
What it actually is.
It's not talking shit toyourself every single day when
(32:41):
you get up and look in themirror.
It's looking at yourself andbeing like you're awesome, you
did a really great job today.
You've got this.
I know this is going to be hard, but you've got this Insert.
Whatever this thing is, it's somuch more than simply now, mind
you, how you fuel your vesseland how you move your body super
(33:04):
important.
That is absolutely a part ofwellness, but it's such a small
fraction yet we are sohyper-focused on those two
things.
I've just realized that morepeople need to lean into
spirituality, lean into positivecoping strategies for when shit
(33:29):
gets handed to us, because youcan do all the work in the world
and shit is still going to gethanded to you.
If you've really developed astrong, solid internal
foundation and compass to dealwith all the shit that you get,
it just helps you to movethrough it more quickly or it
allows for you to again becompassionate with yourself when
you're going through this stuff.
(33:50):
It's about so much more.
I'm like anybody got a mic thatI can tell that to.
You're going to listen?
Cool, I'm here for it.
Amazing.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Yes, Give me the mic.
The ultimate mic drop momentscome from the end of those
things.
Oh my gosh, I love that mindsetof I just want to speak,
healing, not necessarily speakfrom any other notice me, or I
know all these things.
So here we talk.
It truly comes from a place ofhealing and helping people.
(34:22):
I think that's why we connectso much too, because I'm very
much a helper.
So just people helping people,helpers helping out first.
Speaker 1 (34:29):
Yeah, exactly that's why the idea for the books came.
That's literally where the ideafor the books came from I was
just thinking about.
So I was in one of Courtney'sco-author projects at the
beginning of the pandemic 2020,she did a co-author project
called Five Lessons Learned inMotherhood.
(34:50):
So in your chapter you put thefive lessons that you learned as
a mother.
It was cool.
It was like 15, five lessons.
Whatever 15 times five is,somebody can do the math on that
.
I teach reading.
Yeah, carry, the one I don'tknow.
So after we had our book launch, I was like, oh my gosh, you
remember Chicken Soup for theSoul?
(35:11):
I was like that's what thesebooks reminded me of.
I don't think I have ever reada book that has 15 people, or
nine people, saying, hey, thisis how I felt about my body or
this is what I've experienced inthe world that I've lived in as
it relates to how my body is inthis world.
(35:32):
But how healing would it be foryou and I to open up a book and
be like, oh my gosh, I'mgetting chills right now how
this person has been through,whatever it is Me too.
There's so much power in sayingme too.
So I went to Courtney and I waslike, hey, what do you think
about this?
(35:52):
She was like, hey, I reallylike that idea.
Like let's put it out into theworld and see what other people
think about it.
I had the first project filledin a month.
Wow, 15 authors, just like I'mgoing to share, I'm going to
share, I'm going to share, I'mgoing to share.
And it was such a beautifulprocess.
And when launch came about, Iwas like, oh no, I'm sad it's
(36:13):
over and like there's morestories to be shared, and so we
done it all over again.
And now here we are, like somany people talk about how
they've been impacted by bodybliss, even like I'm having
conversations in my DMs rightnow with people who are asking
about book three and they'relike I read book one and it was
so great and I can't wait forbook two to come out and like
(36:34):
it's just, it's really cool tosee like the ripple effects of
what the authors are making.
Because, yes, I have.
I've had the idea for theproject, I've pulled it together
, I'm the lead author, but I'monly one story.
There's so many other peoplethat have shown up for
themselves and shown up forothers.
You included in like sharing apiece of your story, a piece of
(36:56):
your heart, with other people sothat they can feel more
connected unless alone.
Speaker 2 (37:03):
Yes, that drive and that mission for connection, I
think, is what really.
I didn't even have to thinktwice, I said yes and then, like
clenched my butt later about it, but like it was just that
innate feeling of like this is,this is immediately right, and
my nervous system, like my wholebody, was just telling me yes,
from the beginning of it all.
So I really just followed thatand I think that it is really
(37:26):
brave for women to be sharingtheir stories and because it
does create that connection,when you feel like you're
there's been things that I'vewritten down in our chapter that
I have been like, oh man, is itjust me that has felt this way?
And I'm like, no, absolutelynot, there's not, there's not,
never going to be that, andthere's so many different
stories so there's not really away that you can't.
You're either connecting oryou're learning.
(37:47):
You're either connecting oryou're opening your mind and
opening your heart and you'rerealizing that like wow, this is
not a me issue, and it onceagain will hopefully help other
women realize that it was neverme, it was never my body's fault
and this is all why, like allof these lived experiences, Well
, in this book, for example, wehave somebody sharing in their
(38:07):
chapter about, like skinbleaching, where, like people,
where people around her werebleaching their skin so that
they felt like they could fit inand like that was.
Speaker 1 (38:18):
You know, that was something that was new to me.
I didn't realize that that wasyou know lengths that people
were going to, but it just goesto show you, like, you know, all
of these things exist in theshadows and until we shine the
light in those corners, we, wereally don't realize what's
going on.
And so it's just like, sobeautiful to be able to like,
(38:40):
and let me tell you so, fromthis day forward, it's going to
make your day when somebodysends you a DM and says, hey, I
just finished reading yourchapter and what you said, like
really resonated with me.
I think that's one of thecoolest feedback that I've
gotten from like the first booksauthors.
It's is they're like.
I'm getting a lot of messagesfrom people that I know, but
also people that I don't know,who, like, have the book and,
(39:04):
you know, have read my story andfelt so compelled to reach out
to me and tell me how much thatimpact.
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Yes, which really is just like the why behind it all,
like you just want to help thatand spread that healing and
that connection.
So I can, only I can't wait tolike not that I can't wait to
have you DM me, but I just can'twait to like have the book in
everybody's hands, to likereally connect with all of these
amazing humans that are in thisbook.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
Listen, if you haven't so powerful Sorry, I was
just was like if you haven'tordered your copy already or if
you haven't pre-ordered, well,listen, message Becca and get
one, because it's going to be,it's going to be great.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
It is.
It really is so because Ididn't log into the right Zoom
account.
We only have a few minutes left, but I do want to know what
advice would you give somebodywho's trying to build a better
relationship with themselves.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
I think that.
So I'm currently reading a bookright now and I'm actually in a
certification program for thebear coaching.
I don't know if anyonelistening to this is familiar
with Susan Hyatt.
She's also anti-diet and I'mloving it.
One of the things that she saidthat was really the catalyst
for her journey and I think isso beautiful and I've been
(40:21):
sharing it with my clients andmy people is that if you're
feeling really overwhelmed withwhere you're at, with the
relationship with your body orthe way that you're talking to
yourself, tomorrow morning whenyou wake up, just start to think
about all of the decisions thatyou're making in a day,
including the things that you'resaying to yourself on that day,
(40:42):
and start to think about howcan you lead with love I said
this a little bit earlier on,but not how can you love
yourself more, but everydecision that you're making,
everything that you're saying toyourself, how can you start to
shift to love type of decisions?
I'll give you an example.
If you're sitting down to likewatch I'm pointing at my TV.
(41:03):
Nobody can see.
If you're sitting down to likewatch Netflix at the end of the
night or something like that,are you going to watch like some
show that's going to give youlike so much anxiety before you
close your eyes?
Or are you going to like watchsomething that's like going to
make you feel good and thenmaybe that will solve the issues
that you have with sleeping?
(41:23):
Or, like you know, there's somany.
Even like when you're eatingsomething that you really enjoy,
that's like a guilty pleasureor whatever, like enjoy it, but
don't eat so much of it thatyour body is like hurting.
After you know that, like yourstomach is just like feels like
it's going to explode and you'relike, oh my God, I'm in so much
pain.
Just like think about all thosesmall things you can do to lead
(41:46):
with love and sorry, this is areally long answer.
I love it Meeting it up andalso just take it one day at a
time, because what you're doingis you're literally creating new
neural pathways.
That shit doesn't happenovernight.
You're undoing years and yearsand years of programming and if
(42:06):
you, if you, slip up, it'sfucking going to happen and it's
okay.
And you need to becompassionate with yourself in
those moments.
Give yourself some grace andthen just put one foot in front
of the other.
Speaker 2 (42:19):
Oh my, again Mike dropped.
Do we see why?
She's a speaker?
Guys, Put her in front of anytype of Mike, whether it's the
one she's sitting at right nowor on a stage somewhere.
That was so good.
Oh my God, I love that.
Yes, lead with love.
Find a way to choose love orchoose you throughout the day
and those little moments,because that really is where it
all happens, guys.
Speaker 1 (42:40):
Yeah, it's little moments every day.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
Yeah, Well, where can we find you on the socials and
all of you who want todefinitely join book three after
reading and listening to this?
Reading this podcast, listeningto this podcast?
Speaker 1 (42:54):
By the way, reading podcast number four on my Google
searches was how to transcribemy podcast for free.
Oh, there you go.
That's a good one, because Idream of like a anyway like a
blog file podcast.
So I am balance bliss oneverything.
So on Instagram I'm the balancebliss.
As you mentioned earlier, it'sthe balance bliss podcast.
My website is the balance blissdot CA.
(43:16):
Everything balance bliss andyeah.
Speaker 2 (43:22):
I love it.
Thank you so much for beinghere.
I know that there's going to betidbits, especially from the
mamas of the crew that are justgoing to love and get some
advice from you, and I thinkthat that's so important to do,
I hope so.
Guys, tune in next week.
Happy launch day.
Cheers to that.
Shake your ass.
Speaker 1 (43:41):
Go be great.
Shake your ass.
Go be great, yes.
Speaker 2 (43:45):
I love it.
Oh, my God.
Speaker 1 (43:56):
Thanks so much for being here.
I hope you're leaving with afull heart, some inspiration, or
you're feeling the kick in thebutt you felt like you needed.
If you really enjoyed thisepisode, be sure to share it
with a friend or let me knowRates, reviews, subscribing and
sharing are all great ways tosupport the show and if you want
to stay in touch, follow meover on Instagram at
(44:17):
thebalancebliss.
Thanks for listening today andstay well.
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