June 21, 2026 • 41 mins
For years, Annkia knew that something wasn't right.She had spent most of her life living with pain, navigating hospital visits, procedures, medication, and conflicting diagnoses. But despite everything she was experiencing, the answers never seemed to come.
In Part 2 of her story, Annkia shares what happened when she finally met a doctor who listened. What followed was a series of tests that revealed the true cause of the pain she had been living with since childhood: a rare form of bladder cancer.
This is a story about resilience, self-advocacy, hope, and the life-changing power of being believed.
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#LegallyCluelessPodcast #LegallyCluelessAfrica #AfricanStories #Healing #CancerSurvivor #Storytelling #KenyanPodcast #BladderCancerAwareness
In Part 2 of her story, Annkia shares what happened when she finally met a doctor who listened. What followed was a series of tests that revealed the true cause of the pain she had been living with since childhood: a rare form of bladder cancer.
This is a story about resilience, self-advocacy, hope, and the life-changing power of being believed.
Listen to the Legally Clueless Podcast:
https://linktr.ee/legallycluelessafrica
Sign up for our newsletter:
https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com
Share your story:
https://forms.gle/JMrQD55jcrazKFKX7
Connect with us:Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica
https://www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica
https://www.youtube.com/@LegallyCluelessAfrica
https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com
#LegallyCluelessPodcast #LegallyCluelessAfrica #AfricanStories #Healing #CancerSurvivor #Storytelling #KenyanPodcast #BladderCancerAwareness
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
My name is adele On Younger and welcome to another
episode of legally Clueless. No, seriously, i have no clue
what I'm doing, but I'm pretty sure I'm not the
only one. Hey, you welcome to this episode of legally Clueless.
Here's what's coming up.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
I had a partner. He was older. For me, sex
was very different. It was extremely painful. So that first experience,
it didn't sit right with me, and I decided to
tell myself, let me give it another go. And then
I noticed that every time we tried it did get worse.
(00:38):
My blooder flaring up for reasons and known overiances can
be very unkind to anyone who's sexually active, I know,
even younger and Kia was so happy. For the first
time in forever, since I started experiencing pain as a child,
I met someone who actually understood what I was seeing.
(01:00):
And let me tell you. When we did the ultrasound
in January, this yea, there was a tumor the size
of a house in my blood right there the personally
founding in that radiology department. This person turned the screen
and he told me, did you know you have a tumor?
Speaker 1 (01:20):
That is part two of Ankia's story. We're going to
jump into that a little later in this episode, but welcome, Welcome, Welcome.
If you are an og old school member of this family,
I've got nothing but love for you. If you are
a newbie here, welcome to legally Clueless Africa. We have
so many shows for you to enjoy. So on Mondays
(01:41):
we have this show where we have different Africans, primarily
African women, come on and share stories of their lived experience.
On Wednesdays, we have the midwig Te's where I unpack
different topics that I think can be helpful if you're
on your journey of awakening as an African woman. Our
newsletter also goes out on Wednesdays as well. You can
(02:02):
sign up for that on our website. A link is
in the show notes. And on Thursdays we have for
Mandaliss Women. Currently we have a very very exciting special
bonus season where we're going to different African countries outside
of Kenya and speaking to some of my favorite African women.
(02:23):
For Manalist Women is a space where you can get
all the inspiration and expertise to be your true self
and to define womanhood for yourself despite what society has
laid out as the only way to women. No, no, no, no,
you can design womanhood for yourself. The first episode, we
were in Ghana with one of my favorite authors. I
(02:46):
have read one of her books four times, The Sex
Lives of African Women. Ah, it's incredible. Currently reading her
second book called Seeking Sexual Freedom. Her name is Nana,
and we have I had such a powerful conversation on
pleasure freedom and the myth of the good woman. She
(03:07):
doesn't exist, guys, she she doesn't exist. Here's the snippet
of the conversation we had.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
I would say in my twenties, I basically confirmed I
married the first man I had consensual sex with and
was in a relationship with him for many years until
I was like, wait, Twitter is the Spain. Am I
not going to sleep with anybody else for the rest
of my life? And the answer was yeah, I don't
want to be like, you know, like I don't want
(03:36):
to have one sexual pattern for the rest of my life,
which is basically what I've been told I needed to
do as a good kill, and that meant leave in
the relationship and then also giving myself space and time
to explore and you know in quotes, so my wild odes,
which is something I had always had men been encouraged
to do, but women not being encouraged to do. And
that was the ment going against everything I had been taught, right, like,
(03:59):
we're not ho to so wild oad. We had taught
the opposites that we are bad women if we have
multiple sexual partners, if we're not in commented relationships, you know.
And so I made the intention to be a bad girl,
Like it was a deliberate choice because I had now
realized that all the things I had been told, Like,
first of all, men will gossip about you regardless of
(04:22):
what you do. You know, there were people claiming to
have had sex with me when I was still sexually inactive,
you know. So I realized that it has since been
a good girl did not protect me from being gossiped about.
And so I was just like, yet me, just really
do my own thing and then really not care what
people say about me. And that was like a huge
change in my life.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
That is the episode that went out last week. Make
sure you catch it right here on the Legally Clueless
Africa channel, and this week for Mannerless Women is going
to South Africa. If you are a spiritual babe, if
you are in like me, ancestral healing, ancestral cleansing, ancestral callings. Ah,
(05:07):
this this episode is going to be incredible. Think DJ,
who also happens to be an ancestral healer. How freaking
cool is that? That's gonna be out this Thursday. So
make sure you subscribe wherever you're listening to this one
so you never miss any of our shows. Okay, let's
jump into this episode of this show. Last week we
(05:29):
met an Kia all Right and she shared what it
was like growing up with chronic pain. Right. For most
of her life, she lived with symptoms that nobody seemed
to be able to explain, and it ended with her
having about five different surgeries, just years of pain since
she was nine years old, consultations with specialists who still
(05:49):
didn't have answers, and as she got older the symptoms
became harder to ignore. In Part two, a Kia shares
what happened when she finally met a doctor who and
she shares what they discovered after years of searching for
answers and how her life changed almost overnight. A hundred
(06:10):
African stories are legally clueless stories from.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Africa Because I told my sister, it doesn't make sense.
I don't think as much as I know, variances can
be painful, and this sick bladder can be painful. A
blood infection can be painful. It can't be this painful
(06:35):
where you get to the point where walking for five
minutes you feel like you're tired. There was a lot
of fatigue. There was a lot of back pain, a
lot of flank pin a lot of a domino pain.
My abdomenos a loose on fire. It on my sir,
walking is becoming a problem, like I can't. I don't
(06:56):
enjoy walks. I don't enjoy lying on my back. I
told her this has to be something more. And we
went to see a specialist, are urologist in July twenty
twenty five, and I remember they did he asked for
comprehensive tests. The comprehensive tests were done, not really comprehensive
(07:19):
were they just an ultrasound? And I remember they told
me that this doctor told me the same thing, told
me that I have an ovariancist that has regarded again
and that I have a blood infection. And he told him,
can it be something deeper than this guy? I was like,
(07:40):
I've been six since class three, can we do something
else to check And he was like, no, I'll just
refer you to agayn ecologist. I was like, we've gone
through this in twenty twenty three. So are urologist deals
with the Reynolds system. So if you have kidney issues,
if you have a blood issues, you go see a urologist.
(08:03):
They deal with the Renald system only, and a gynecologist
who have been referred to several they deal with the
reproductive system, the female reproductive system. Going to a urologist
and we find that you've been referred to a gynecologist.
I remember most urologists told me that these two systems
(08:24):
are quite close there. They're neighbors, so if one is sick,
there's a probability that the other one will get affected.
So for me, I remember having very that time of
the month was quite painful and it would also affect
the neighbor, which was my bladder. My rental system would
(08:47):
be on fire also, so that I remember getting to
a point. I remember going to see, you know, my
doctor and telling my doctor that for me, having a
sick blood that time of the month for me also
makes my blader act up and it's like their neighbors,
(09:08):
their close friends, so one might cause the other to
flare up or something. So I was like, okay, okay,
that's that's fine. This so I so in campus, I
did find myself being referred to again ecologist. And this
also happened now in twenty twenty five, where you've gone
(09:29):
for an ultrasound this doctor when your my urologists would
ask for a pelvic ultrasound. So this pelvic ultrason would
give you a look into not only your bladder and
your kidneys, but also your you terrors and your over is,
how healthy are they your cervix, So a pelvic cultra
(09:52):
sound gives you a look into both. So that's why
it was very easy for him to know that I
need to prefer you to this doctor, uh, this kydnacologist,
because clearly there's something wrong. So it was yes, so
the two the two are they married each other. When
it came to having sexual partners in campus, I stayed away.
(10:17):
I abstained from having sexual partners. I did try. I
had a partner. He was older, he's a friend to
my sister, and I remember for me, sex was very different,
it was extremely painful. So that's that's first experience. Ah,
(10:46):
it just it didn't sit right with me, didn't sit
well with me, and I decided to tell myself, no,
let me, let me give it another go. And I
was like, you know what your your partner is understanding.
I remember he was very he was a very understanding person,
(11:06):
and he would always ask questions, is like what did
the doctors say? Is it okay to try again? And
I was very open to trying again. And then I
noticed that it got worse with every every time it tried,
it did get worse. Uh, not only from your my
(11:32):
bladder flaring up for reasons and known infection, but also
from oviances can be very and kind to anyone who's
sexually active. So I remember at that time, that's when
my that's when my doctor told me these two are
very very close to each other, your urology system and
(11:59):
your kind of coological system. And I decided, let me
take a brick like this. I tried. It didn't work.
I'm pretty sure I'm not hallucinating when I tell myself
that this cannot be. It like, this can't be sexual
(12:23):
encounters for everyone. This can I'm pretture it's not like
this for every lady and I decided to end the
relationship and just take a break. I did not enjoy it.
It was extremely painful. There was even bleeding after every
time like I tried, I would end up going back.
(12:45):
So every time we try the following day, you automatic
automatically have to go to hospital because you have to
go and explain that there bleeding, the pain you can
barely walk. Yeah, so I did take a break and
that was a that was so the red flags kept
(13:06):
piling up because you've gone from your experiencing back pain,
you're experiencing abdominal pain, and now sexual encounters are not normal.
So when you go to hospital and you're not hard,
no one really gets what you're saying. And I used
(13:26):
to tell myself, is it that I'm not articulating myself?
Well what is happening? And I'll tell myself, no, Jerry,
You're not crazy. You're not making this stuff up, are you?
And I would even ask my doctors like do you
get such cases often? Like am I or am I
(13:47):
like the only person who comes here to complain of
these symptoms? And after the ultrasum that was done in
twenty twenty five July and you've gone from bladder infection variances. Here,
here our antibiotics to help. I think I became a
bit depressed the internship that I had landed at the
(14:10):
time I put in my resignation. Later in October twenty
twenty five, when I was I was done because the
commute was terrible for me. It got to a point
to our sitting became an extreme spot because it felt
like someone was crashing my abdomin every time I sat.
So sitting in meetings wasn't fun anymore. Commuting to work
(14:34):
was not fun. Any movement was not fun for me.
So I decided let me, let me, let me rest
like it's never that serious that time I had I
think I had worked in about three three companies and
had not enjoyed my time working for these three companies
because of the constant pain so in that was in
(14:56):
October five, I decided to take a break from work,
and my mum was not very happy, and I remember
she told me, why didn't you consult me? And I
told her for the first time, I think I was
just done, and I told her to my body and
I'm the only one who carries this pain, really no,
and I don't think there's a day where I've been.
(15:18):
I've been told, you know, let me take let me
take some of the pain away, to give you a break.
It was a lot on one person, and the symptoms
somehow got worse when I decided to take a break.
I don't know how, but they did. How would I
explain that level of pain after resigning in October twenty
(15:39):
twenty five, November and December, what extremely terrible month's health
twice and I was not doing anything. I was resting,
I was at home, but I was not sleeping. So
mid December, I told my sister, I feel like I'm
going to die because this meds are not working. I
(16:01):
feel like it was a feeling where I felt like
the meds are even fighting me now. And I told
my sister something is very wrong. I told her it's
the kind of pain that was very aggressive. It was
very unforgiving. It was terrible. I could barely sleep. I
(16:23):
remember the whole night. I used to be up all
night because I had to get like a hot compress,
those hot water bottles, and I would be up all
night because I had to. When the water gets warmer,
you have to get like a you have to change,
you have to like boil more hot water, make sure
the compress is hot enough for to battle. There that
(16:47):
level of pain and this and the meads that was
on at the time, they had very They had terrible
side effects. You have noaseia, you have dizziness. I can
barely eat. My sister decided, you know what, Jerry looks
extremely and well, let's let's look for another specialist in
(17:13):
twenty twenty sixth January. So he booked an appointment the
first week of January. I didn't even book it. She
had to book it. That is how I was in
a terrible state that I would even zone out. Sometimes.
It's also fog. I can tell you that December is
very foggy because if I got a moment to take
a nap, maybe the a certain pin killer or muscle
(17:37):
relaxer has worked, and I get to nap for two hours,
I'd be out like a light gone. And it became
very foggy. And we did go to Agacan and decided to,
you know, consult at different virologists. And what stood out
for me is I've been to that hospital several times
(17:59):
and this was very new. I was like, I've never
seen this name before. Maybe a first set of eyes
would be able to tell us what's wrong. And for
the first time, I know even younger and Kia was
so happy. For the first time in forever, since I
started experiencing pain as a child, I met someone who
(18:22):
actually understood what I was seeing. This person sat there,
listened to me and narrate what I have felt since
class three. He noted down everything. I told him I
have been to theater five times. He's like five, you know.
He listened and listened. I told him I'm experiencing nausea, dizziness.
(18:42):
I told him I easily get tired all the time.
And I told him, doctrry. I'm not lazy. I just
get tired easily. I don't know why. And it's like continue.
It's like I'm like back pin a domino pin. I
would tell him there's pain on my and I told
him my right side. I can't sleep on my right side.
(19:03):
I can't sit on my right side. And he was
like noting down everything. And after that he was like,
your symptoms they're not normal. And I was like, thank
you God, thank you. I have been waiting all my
life to hear there's nothing normal about this tuition. And
I told him I have a history of aweariance. Since
(19:24):
I have a history of a couple of procedures in
better I've seen this doctor and that doctor and he
was like, yes, yes, he's a urologist too, but he
was different and he was so kind and he listened.
I felt like I was talking well due to lacking
proper further figure. But from my grandfather, I felt like
(19:45):
talking to my to our father. He actually understood and
I was so happy. You can imagine. I was feeling relief.
And he has not even given me medication. So this
was the first person to say let's It was like
you you've come to This is also new to him,
and he decided. He told me, you'll forgive me, but
(20:05):
kindly be patient with me. And I told him, I'm
going to be patient. I completely trust you. I don't
know you, but I trust you. And he was like,
I'm going to Since everything is so new, nothing is
showing up in the ultrasound done in twenty twenty five,
let's do another one. It was like, let's do a
fresh ultrasound. Let's do blood work, and I was like
(20:28):
blood work tests I've never done. I was like, let's
do a liver test. Let's do a kidney function. Let's
see how these organs are doing after years and years
of antibiotics and infections. He was like, people are focusing
on your blood. Has anyone ever checked your kidneys? I'm
like no, even I got worried. I was like, none
(20:50):
has ever done this for me. I was like oh,
and he was like he was the first person to say,
you've been on antibiotics for years and years. Are they
not working because you're now rasist to them. I was like,
no one has ever checked. And he said, let's do
a sensitivity test. Let's see which antibiotics work for you now.
(21:10):
I was like, oh my god, where has this person
been all my life? I felt like hugging him and
telling him thank you. And he gave me medication, but
he did not give me strong antibiotics. He was like,
let's start small. I'm not going to give you message
will make you dizzy and nauseated. Let's start small. He
(21:31):
was like, this will help with pain, but you know,
just mild. I was like, it's okay, okay. He has
really told him told me to be patient. I'm going
to be patient and let me tell you. When we
did the ultrasound in January this year, there was a
tumor the size of our house in my blood right there.
(21:56):
It just propped from nowhere. I remember we did the
ultras on, the pelvic ultras on, and that the person
we found in in that radiology department. This person turned
the screen and he told me, did you know you
have a tumor? I was like, no, I I've never
(22:17):
seen it. Like I even told him I've done an
ultrasound a couple of months ago. Where has it been.
It was like, it's right here, it is crashing your
right kidney. That's why there was a lot of pain
on like on my right side. My right kidney was swollen.
(22:37):
I was so shocked. I was, oh my goodness. He
even called like his colleague into the room and he
was like, this is doctor something something. I had to
call him so that he can see that he can
see what I'm seeing. And they discussed for a couple
of minutes there. I just remember being shocked. I have
(23:00):
never seen this tumor, never been told about tumor. They
asked me, did you know your right kidney was sollen?
I told him I did not know. Did you know
your left your left kidney is blocked. I did not know.
No one has ever told me this, one as ever
done tests to check this. When they were done, nothing
(23:25):
showed up. I remember they asked me who my doctor
was and I told him that I told them the name,
and they were like, you in safe hands. Just take
this to him. He'll know what to do next. And
we went back to my doctor and he was like,
I told you this is unclear. I told you this
(23:46):
is not normal. It's not a normal situation. Everything mentioned
here last time just prove that there's something very wrong.
And when we showed him there results, he was like,
we need to act first now because we don't know
what this tumor is, but we do know that it's
(24:06):
causing a lot of pain. So he said, let's do
a scan. Let's see is this tumor only inside the
bladder and if it's big, how big is it is
it outside the bladder? Has it affected other areas? And
we did go first scan immediately with my sister, and
(24:30):
unfortunately found that the tumor was not only inside the bladder,
but it had grown so much that he was even
outside the bladder. And I was like, okay, well this
is proper hell and we went back to my doctor.
I was still in excruciating pain. It's very aggressive pain.
(24:52):
And when we did go back to my doctor, he
was like, the following day, let's go to theater and
let's remove part of this. You might know what's happening,
like is it benign?
Speaker 3 (25:04):
Is it?
Speaker 2 (25:04):
Like? Is it benign? Is it malignant malignancy? Meaning cancer?
So I was like, okay, okay, that's not bad, is it.
I was like, I'm here. You need to need to
be very calm and very be ready for the worst.
Like I was prepared for the worst. I was like,
even if it's malignant, if it's malignant tumor, if it's
(25:28):
it's it's meaning cancer. I was like, it's okay. I
have faith in this doctor. I feel like, even if
it's cancer, he'll know what to do. And he took
me to theater and put me on very nice medication
that was a very strong medication like the likes of morphine,
and I was in heaven. I was I would not
(25:51):
recommend because might get addicted. But for the first time
in a while, I was in zero pin. This doctor mete.
I was in zero pin before going into theater. I
was like, now we can go. Now, it's good time.
Let's go. We've put fentanil, We've put morephine in your system,
and I was so happy. Took me to theater. I recovered,
(26:13):
and after recovery, we went back to see him. We
went back to see a very sad face. He was
not as bright as when I met him. My doctor
on this day, there were more people in his office. Immediately,
I think your brain just registers that there can't be
five people in the room to tell you don't have cancer.
So I was like, oh, well, well, yeah we are.
(26:37):
And my mom was present that day and got into
the office and my doctor was well, he didn't even
say hi. I was just like, oh, welcome, welcome, have
a seat, and I'm like a couple of people in
the room, and he said, I wish I had better
news for you. Unfortunately, it's a cancerrous tumor. I was
(26:57):
like zero emotion. I had zero emotion. I was like, yes, yes, next,
and he tells me. He proceeds to say it's a
rare cancer. So about one to five percent of the
world population get this type of cancer. It's called Squeamer's
cell carcinoma of the bladder. I told him, I've never
(27:19):
had such and he was like, it's okay because it's
a rare cancer. Being rare means now you need a
lot of people on board so that nothing goes wrong.
So he was like, it's a He was like, let's
just put it plainly. It's bladder cancer. And he told
(27:42):
me this, this tumor is not it's not a young tumor.
This tumor has been there. It has been cooking up
and cooking up and for it to grow to that
size where it has actually affected my reproductive system. So
(28:02):
it does not only it did not only affect my bladder,
it also affected my reproductive system. So it was like,
it has been there, it's not new. And I was like, okay, okay. Next,
like I was, I just wanted to know, like, what
is this person's game plan. You're a couple of people
in this office, And I was like, whatever it is,
(28:25):
I am ready because if we are here and we
are talking about it, that means that someone in this
room might have a solution, and I'm very ready to
hear that solution. Actually throw a couple of solutions at
midro Plan A, plan B. I am open to it.
Is it key or is it surgery. Very open to it,
(28:47):
and we had to give my mom a couple of minutes,
of course, to digest the news, and my doctor reassured her.
But I can tell you for a fact that not
even a single drop sat, tear drop, nothing like. I
was completely numb. I don't even was scared. I do
(29:09):
not know why, but I did not respond to this news.
What I was looking forward to is for someone to
tell me we do have a planning place. I what
would have scared me and I would have broke down
and cried my eyes out, is someone telling me it's
too late. Now that you now that you don't want
(29:31):
to hear you don't want to hear that. Unfortunately, it's
too late. We cannot do much for you. When he
said that, they sat down and they came up with
a plan. I was so happy. I was like, oh God,
there's hope.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
There's room for.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
Me to actually have a normal life. And after years
and years of medications and doctors, you're actually happy to
have a final diagnosis like you're no long these we're
no longer moving with the news of narrow urethra or oveiances.
(30:06):
There's just a tumor that has been seated in your abdomin,
affecting your bladder in your reproductive system. I was so happy.
I was relieved. I was like, finally someone took time,
listened to me and said, we have to do more
comprehensive tests. This is not normal. Now it was beginning
(30:27):
like the treatment plan. Being a urologist, he could not
work on his own, so he had he asked me
for permission to present my case to the tumor board
in their hospital. So these people, specially through treat cancer,
that is oncologists, they are present a team of that
(30:48):
is a bode of that people get to decide what
will happen. I was like, okay, now what do you
need for you know, so that you present my case.
So that meant more tests have to be done. You
have to do an AMA right to know which stage
cancer is. You have to do something called a pet scan.
Where can I really explain what a petscan does. A
(31:10):
petscan is done to ensure that the cancer cells in
your body. For me, especially for my case, they are
to ensure that the cancer cells are only in the abdomen.
So this test is done little like a full body scan,
so that before they start treatment. They have to make
sure that they're not cancer cells in your lungs or
your liver. They're only present worthy, you know, just the abdomin.
(31:33):
So before they start, they have to make sure we're
only concentrating on the abdomin. We're not. We're not dealing
with lung cancer. We're dealing with colon cancer, like just
blood a cancer. And that was it. I was like, okay, okay,
that's fine. So with this test, you was able to
present my case. And even with presenting this case, this
doctor was kind enough to talk to them about welfare support.
(31:57):
So he told them that SES a young lady currently jobless.
We talked to them and he was able to convince
them that in case of treatment like chemo, they can cover.
I can get to undergo free chemo. They have a
free chemo program. So I was not aware. We got
(32:18):
a call from the welfare support people in Nagacan and
they were like, your doctor has put in a request
for you, so we need, you know, bank statements and
pass statements just to make sure how much we can cover.
Like they want to know how much we can cover
and how much they can do for me. And I
was like, oh my god, this person is heaven sent,
(32:39):
so this is something he did. When he presented the
case to the tumor board, he decided also he didn't
want to do. What made me happy also is that
this person was not doing things blindly. So he got
a gay nacologist on board because he was like, if
it has affected your productive system, we need to find
someone we'll take care of that. And also got like
(33:01):
one of the oncologists on board also so that he
doesn't do things blindly, gets to consult them. And I
got to meet all of them. And after the tumor
board discussed, I was very anxious because we knew that
the next appointment would be told. It said that we're
doing chemo, we're doing radiotherapy, or we are surgery. We
(33:27):
have to get rid of a couple of organs that
are affected together with the tumor. I was like, okay, okay,
that's that's fine. None of these options are easy. I have.
I have. I come from our family where cancer is genetic.
(33:49):
So when you tell me the options, I have seen
for myself the effects of these options. So even before
so when he went to present the case to the BOOD,
of course I was asked a million questions. This oncologist
asked me a million questions. This ecologists asked me a
million question and so did my doctor. And in the
(34:09):
process they realized cancer is common in my mom, in
my family, especially my mom's side, my matern out side,
and for us, you know, we've never really thought much
about it. And for them, they were like, this is
a very important point. It was like, this might be
a genetic abnormality that caused cancer at twenty five and
(34:31):
that is why I was explaining to them. I was like, oh, oh,
my bad. And I was telling them I am probably
the sixth cancer patient in my family now. And what
really caught the attention is that my grandma, my grandmother,
(34:52):
that is them on my mom's side, she passed away
about three years ago, ah, due to cancer. And was like,
due to genetics, might have gotten it from her. And
they even asked, they were asking questions about around my mom,
(35:14):
her siblings and her cousins if either of them has
ever been affected, and they were even advising can they
go get tested as early as now. So of course
they were asking the age of this of the patient
and the type of cancer. And for me, it was
very for me, it was unique because of course not
(35:35):
in a good way. But for my grandmother, they were older.
My grandmother was in her seventies and for its what
colon cancer. So colon cancer is the one that's very
compon in my mom's side, on my mom's side, and
for me, I was For me, it was like, you've
had a sick bladder, so probably this is why it
(35:58):
was very easy for it to be a host to
these cells. And I was like, okay, okay, when you're
thinking chemotherapy, I have seen members of my family who
are still undergoing chemotherapy. So the anxiety comes with you
have seen the effects of all these options. I have
seen the effects of someone who has undergone surgery to
(36:21):
lose a couple of organs. It's not easy. I have
seen my grandma who was and I went surgery and
didn't make it after the surgery, and I realized, not
even the cancer that kidns you, it's just the pain
(36:42):
it causes. And I was like okay. And I even
before they told me, I really knew that radiotherapy is
the most painful form of cancer treatment. It cooks your
organs just radiation. You're exposed to radiation and it ends
up even cooking the cooking the organs that it was
(37:03):
not supposed to cook. They decided, you know, and Kia
is young, she can handle surgery. Let's do the first
first of all, Like it was the first time they
did this type of surgery, like a cunt, and I
was like, oh, gonna give me a pick. That's not bad,
is it? So I was like, Okay, that doesn't that's
not stressful.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
Catch more African stories in the next episode of Legally Cullous.
That was part two of Akiya's story. The final part,
part three, goes out next week on Monday on this show,
So make sure you subscribe so you don't miss out
on it. I feel like one thing that's said with
me after listening to part two is how life changing
(37:43):
it can be to truly be listened to. And it's
so unfortunate that very many African women or Black women,
the stats show this, and not listened to in in
healthcare in hospitals, like even just something like pain, it's
assumed where overreact like nan, no, you okay, even when
you're saying, bro, I am dying. This pain is a lot.
(38:06):
The research shows that black women are often ignored, not
listened to not taken seriously in health care spaces, like
in hospitals or by health care practitioners. I remember seeing
this TikTok of a woman who said that she went
to see a gynecologist, a guy, and I think she
(38:28):
wanted an IUD placed in her or something. There was
a procedure that needed to be done, and it wasn't
sugery or anything, but she did ask the receptionists and
the nurse like, okay, so what's the pain policy here?
Like do you numb me when I'm undergoing this process?
(38:50):
And they were like, no, the pain like the policy
here is that you don't get numbed for that. The
doctor said that the doctor is a guy who's never
experienced this, but procedure because it is primarily and only
for women, right, But yeah, we just we just don't
get listened to it. And once you find a doctor who listens,
(39:10):
it's such a relief, right, a doctor who sees you.
I mean for years, Ki was like, something is not right.
Can you imagine having to explain your symptoms over and
over and over and it feels like people are not
taking it seriously. Imagine if they listened when she was
younger and how early they would have caught the tumor.
(39:31):
And honestly, I think that's the takeaway I'm sitting is
for this story. It's just like, never underestimate what it
means to listen to people when they tell you they're
in pain, whether it's a child, a friend, a partner,
a patient, or even you yourself. Don't dismiss your own pain,
you know, because like healing can truly just starts properly
(39:54):
when someone says, I hear you, and my goodness, her
resilience is just something else despite everything she endured, and
Care never stopped searching for answers, you know. And in
part three we speak treatment and we speak where she
is now. So make sure you subscribe so you don't
(40:14):
miss out on part three. It's the final part which
will be out next Monday. If un Care story resonated
with you, please share this with somebody who you feel
needs to hear it. But also if you want to
share your story, your African, your story is valid and
we want to hear it, fill out our storytellerform. A
link to it is in the show notes. One of
(40:34):
our correspondents is going to get back to you. Thank
you so so much for listening to this episode to
the very end. I truly appreciate you. I truly believe
that you have every single thing it takes to heal.
That's it for this episode of Legally Clueless. You can
share this podcast with your friends. You can keep it
for yourself. I'm not judging. Just make sure you're here
(40:56):
next week for the next episode.
My name is adele On Younger and welcome to another
episode of legally Clueless. No, seriously, i have no clue
what I'm doing, but I'm pretty sure I'm not the
only one. Hey, you welcome to this episode of legally Clueless.
Here's what's coming up.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
I had a partner. He was older. For me, sex
was very different. It was extremely painful. So that first experience,
it didn't sit right with me, and I decided to
tell myself, let me give it another go. And then
I noticed that every time we tried it did get worse.
(00:38):
My blooder flaring up for reasons and known overiances can
be very unkind to anyone who's sexually active, I know,
even younger and Kia was so happy. For the first
time in forever, since I started experiencing pain as a child,
I met someone who actually understood what I was seeing.
(01:00):
And let me tell you. When we did the ultrasound
in January, this yea, there was a tumor the size
of a house in my blood right there the personally
founding in that radiology department. This person turned the screen
and he told me, did you know you have a tumor?
Speaker 1 (01:20):
That is part two of Ankia's story. We're going to
jump into that a little later in this episode, but welcome, Welcome, Welcome.
If you are an og old school member of this family,
I've got nothing but love for you. If you are
a newbie here, welcome to legally Clueless Africa. We have
so many shows for you to enjoy. So on Mondays
(01:41):
we have this show where we have different Africans, primarily
African women, come on and share stories of their lived experience.
On Wednesdays, we have the midwig Te's where I unpack
different topics that I think can be helpful if you're
on your journey of awakening as an African woman. Our
newsletter also goes out on Wednesdays as well. You can
(02:02):
sign up for that on our website. A link is
in the show notes. And on Thursdays we have for
Mandaliss Women. Currently we have a very very exciting special
bonus season where we're going to different African countries outside
of Kenya and speaking to some of my favorite African women.
(02:23):
For Manalist Women is a space where you can get
all the inspiration and expertise to be your true self
and to define womanhood for yourself despite what society has
laid out as the only way to women. No, no, no, no,
you can design womanhood for yourself. The first episode, we
were in Ghana with one of my favorite authors. I
(02:46):
have read one of her books four times, The Sex
Lives of African Women. Ah, it's incredible. Currently reading her
second book called Seeking Sexual Freedom. Her name is Nana,
and we have I had such a powerful conversation on
pleasure freedom and the myth of the good woman. She
(03:07):
doesn't exist, guys, she she doesn't exist. Here's the snippet
of the conversation we had.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
I would say in my twenties, I basically confirmed I
married the first man I had consensual sex with and
was in a relationship with him for many years until
I was like, wait, Twitter is the Spain. Am I
not going to sleep with anybody else for the rest
of my life? And the answer was yeah, I don't
want to be like, you know, like I don't want
(03:36):
to have one sexual pattern for the rest of my life,
which is basically what I've been told I needed to
do as a good kill, and that meant leave in
the relationship and then also giving myself space and time
to explore and you know in quotes, so my wild odes,
which is something I had always had men been encouraged
to do, but women not being encouraged to do. And
that was the ment going against everything I had been taught, right, like,
(03:59):
we're not ho to so wild oad. We had taught
the opposites that we are bad women if we have
multiple sexual partners, if we're not in commented relationships, you know.
And so I made the intention to be a bad girl,
Like it was a deliberate choice because I had now
realized that all the things I had been told, Like,
first of all, men will gossip about you regardless of
(04:22):
what you do. You know, there were people claiming to
have had sex with me when I was still sexually inactive,
you know. So I realized that it has since been
a good girl did not protect me from being gossiped about.
And so I was just like, yet me, just really
do my own thing and then really not care what
people say about me. And that was like a huge
change in my life.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
That is the episode that went out last week. Make
sure you catch it right here on the Legally Clueless
Africa channel, and this week for Mannerless Women is going
to South Africa. If you are a spiritual babe, if
you are in like me, ancestral healing, ancestral cleansing, ancestral callings. Ah,
(05:07):
this this episode is going to be incredible. Think DJ,
who also happens to be an ancestral healer. How freaking
cool is that? That's gonna be out this Thursday. So
make sure you subscribe wherever you're listening to this one
so you never miss any of our shows. Okay, let's
jump into this episode of this show. Last week we
(05:29):
met an Kia all Right and she shared what it
was like growing up with chronic pain. Right. For most
of her life, she lived with symptoms that nobody seemed
to be able to explain, and it ended with her
having about five different surgeries, just years of pain since
she was nine years old, consultations with specialists who still
(05:49):
didn't have answers, and as she got older the symptoms
became harder to ignore. In Part two, a Kia shares
what happened when she finally met a doctor who and
she shares what they discovered after years of searching for
answers and how her life changed almost overnight. A hundred
(06:10):
African stories are legally clueless stories from.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Africa Because I told my sister, it doesn't make sense.
I don't think as much as I know, variances can
be painful, and this sick bladder can be painful. A
blood infection can be painful. It can't be this painful
(06:35):
where you get to the point where walking for five
minutes you feel like you're tired. There was a lot
of fatigue. There was a lot of back pain, a
lot of flank pin a lot of a domino pain.
My abdomenos a loose on fire. It on my sir,
walking is becoming a problem, like I can't. I don't
(06:56):
enjoy walks. I don't enjoy lying on my back. I
told her this has to be something more. And we
went to see a specialist, are urologist in July twenty
twenty five, and I remember they did he asked for
comprehensive tests. The comprehensive tests were done, not really comprehensive
(07:19):
were they just an ultrasound? And I remember they told
me that this doctor told me the same thing, told
me that I have an ovariancist that has regarded again
and that I have a blood infection. And he told him,
can it be something deeper than this guy? I was like,
(07:40):
I've been six since class three, can we do something
else to check And he was like, no, I'll just
refer you to agayn ecologist. I was like, we've gone
through this in twenty twenty three. So are urologist deals
with the Reynolds system. So if you have kidney issues,
if you have a blood issues, you go see a urologist.
(08:03):
They deal with the Renald system only, and a gynecologist
who have been referred to several they deal with the
reproductive system, the female reproductive system. Going to a urologist
and we find that you've been referred to a gynecologist.
I remember most urologists told me that these two systems
(08:24):
are quite close there. They're neighbors, so if one is sick,
there's a probability that the other one will get affected.
So for me, I remember having very that time of
the month was quite painful and it would also affect
the neighbor, which was my bladder. My rental system would
(08:47):
be on fire also, so that I remember getting to
a point. I remember going to see, you know, my
doctor and telling my doctor that for me, having a
sick blood that time of the month for me also
makes my blader act up and it's like their neighbors,
(09:08):
their close friends, so one might cause the other to
flare up or something. So I was like, okay, okay,
that's that's fine. This so I so in campus, I
did find myself being referred to again ecologist. And this
also happened now in twenty twenty five, where you've gone
(09:29):
for an ultrasound this doctor when your my urologists would
ask for a pelvic ultrasound. So this pelvic ultrason would
give you a look into not only your bladder and
your kidneys, but also your you terrors and your over is,
how healthy are they your cervix, So a pelvic cultra
(09:52):
sound gives you a look into both. So that's why
it was very easy for him to know that I
need to prefer you to this doctor, uh, this kydnacologist,
because clearly there's something wrong. So it was yes, so
the two the two are they married each other. When
it came to having sexual partners in campus, I stayed away.
(10:17):
I abstained from having sexual partners. I did try. I
had a partner. He was older, he's a friend to
my sister, and I remember for me, sex was very different,
it was extremely painful. So that's that's first experience. Ah,
(10:46):
it just it didn't sit right with me, didn't sit
well with me, and I decided to tell myself, no,
let me, let me give it another go. And I
was like, you know what your your partner is understanding.
I remember he was very he was a very understanding person,
(11:06):
and he would always ask questions, is like what did
the doctors say? Is it okay to try again? And
I was very open to trying again. And then I
noticed that it got worse with every every time it tried,
it did get worse. Uh, not only from your my
(11:32):
bladder flaring up for reasons and known infection, but also
from oviances can be very and kind to anyone who's
sexually active. So I remember at that time, that's when
my that's when my doctor told me these two are
very very close to each other, your urology system and
(11:59):
your kind of coological system. And I decided, let me
take a brick like this. I tried. It didn't work.
I'm pretty sure I'm not hallucinating when I tell myself
that this cannot be. It like, this can't be sexual
(12:23):
encounters for everyone. This can I'm pretture it's not like
this for every lady and I decided to end the
relationship and just take a break. I did not enjoy it.
It was extremely painful. There was even bleeding after every
time like I tried, I would end up going back.
(12:45):
So every time we try the following day, you automatic
automatically have to go to hospital because you have to
go and explain that there bleeding, the pain you can
barely walk. Yeah, so I did take a break and
that was a that was so the red flags kept
(13:06):
piling up because you've gone from your experiencing back pain,
you're experiencing abdominal pain, and now sexual encounters are not normal.
So when you go to hospital and you're not hard,
no one really gets what you're saying. And I used
(13:26):
to tell myself, is it that I'm not articulating myself?
Well what is happening? And I'll tell myself, no, Jerry,
You're not crazy. You're not making this stuff up, are you?
And I would even ask my doctors like do you
get such cases often? Like am I or am I
(13:47):
like the only person who comes here to complain of
these symptoms? And after the ultrasum that was done in
twenty twenty five July and you've gone from bladder infection variances. Here,
here our antibiotics to help. I think I became a
bit depressed the internship that I had landed at the
(14:10):
time I put in my resignation. Later in October twenty
twenty five, when I was I was done because the
commute was terrible for me. It got to a point
to our sitting became an extreme spot because it felt
like someone was crashing my abdomin every time I sat.
So sitting in meetings wasn't fun anymore. Commuting to work
(14:34):
was not fun. Any movement was not fun for me.
So I decided let me, let me, let me rest
like it's never that serious that time I had I
think I had worked in about three three companies and
had not enjoyed my time working for these three companies
because of the constant pain so in that was in
(14:56):
October five, I decided to take a break from work,
and my mum was not very happy, and I remember
she told me, why didn't you consult me? And I
told her for the first time, I think I was
just done, and I told her to my body and
I'm the only one who carries this pain, really no,
and I don't think there's a day where I've been.
(15:18):
I've been told, you know, let me take let me
take some of the pain away, to give you a break.
It was a lot on one person, and the symptoms
somehow got worse when I decided to take a break.
I don't know how, but they did. How would I
explain that level of pain after resigning in October twenty
(15:39):
twenty five, November and December, what extremely terrible month's health
twice and I was not doing anything. I was resting,
I was at home, but I was not sleeping. So
mid December, I told my sister, I feel like I'm
going to die because this meds are not working. I
(16:01):
feel like it was a feeling where I felt like
the meds are even fighting me now. And I told
my sister something is very wrong. I told her it's
the kind of pain that was very aggressive. It was
very unforgiving. It was terrible. I could barely sleep. I
(16:23):
remember the whole night. I used to be up all
night because I had to get like a hot compress,
those hot water bottles, and I would be up all
night because I had to. When the water gets warmer,
you have to get like a you have to change,
you have to like boil more hot water, make sure
the compress is hot enough for to battle. There that
(16:47):
level of pain and this and the meads that was
on at the time, they had very They had terrible
side effects. You have noaseia, you have dizziness. I can
barely eat. My sister decided, you know what, Jerry looks
extremely and well, let's let's look for another specialist in
(17:13):
twenty twenty sixth January. So he booked an appointment the
first week of January. I didn't even book it. She
had to book it. That is how I was in
a terrible state that I would even zone out. Sometimes.
It's also fog. I can tell you that December is
very foggy because if I got a moment to take
a nap, maybe the a certain pin killer or muscle
(17:37):
relaxer has worked, and I get to nap for two hours,
I'd be out like a light gone. And it became
very foggy. And we did go to Agacan and decided to,
you know, consult at different virologists. And what stood out
for me is I've been to that hospital several times
(17:59):
and this was very new. I was like, I've never
seen this name before. Maybe a first set of eyes
would be able to tell us what's wrong. And for
the first time, I know even younger and Kia was
so happy. For the first time in forever, since I
started experiencing pain as a child, I met someone who
(18:22):
actually understood what I was seeing. This person sat there,
listened to me and narrate what I have felt since
class three. He noted down everything. I told him I
have been to theater five times. He's like five, you know.
He listened and listened. I told him I'm experiencing nausea, dizziness.
(18:42):
I told him I easily get tired all the time.
And I told him, doctrry. I'm not lazy. I just
get tired easily. I don't know why. And it's like continue.
It's like I'm like back pin a domino pin. I
would tell him there's pain on my and I told
him my right side. I can't sleep on my right side.
(19:03):
I can't sit on my right side. And he was
like noting down everything. And after that he was like,
your symptoms they're not normal. And I was like, thank
you God, thank you. I have been waiting all my
life to hear there's nothing normal about this tuition. And
I told him I have a history of aweariance. Since
(19:24):
I have a history of a couple of procedures in
better I've seen this doctor and that doctor and he
was like, yes, yes, he's a urologist too, but he
was different and he was so kind and he listened.
I felt like I was talking well due to lacking
proper further figure. But from my grandfather, I felt like
(19:45):
talking to my to our father. He actually understood and
I was so happy. You can imagine. I was feeling relief.
And he has not even given me medication. So this
was the first person to say let's It was like
you you've come to This is also new to him,
and he decided. He told me, you'll forgive me, but
(20:05):
kindly be patient with me. And I told him, I'm
going to be patient. I completely trust you. I don't
know you, but I trust you. And he was like,
I'm going to Since everything is so new, nothing is
showing up in the ultrasound done in twenty twenty five,
let's do another one. It was like, let's do a
fresh ultrasound. Let's do blood work, and I was like
(20:28):
blood work tests I've never done. I was like, let's
do a liver test. Let's do a kidney function. Let's
see how these organs are doing after years and years
of antibiotics and infections. He was like, people are focusing
on your blood. Has anyone ever checked your kidneys? I'm
like no, even I got worried. I was like, none
(20:50):
has ever done this for me. I was like oh,
and he was like he was the first person to say,
you've been on antibiotics for years and years. Are they
not working because you're now rasist to them. I was like,
no one has ever checked. And he said, let's do
a sensitivity test. Let's see which antibiotics work for you now.
(21:10):
I was like, oh my god, where has this person
been all my life? I felt like hugging him and
telling him thank you. And he gave me medication, but
he did not give me strong antibiotics. He was like,
let's start small. I'm not going to give you message
will make you dizzy and nauseated. Let's start small. He
(21:31):
was like, this will help with pain, but you know,
just mild. I was like, it's okay, okay. He has
really told him told me to be patient. I'm going
to be patient and let me tell you. When we
did the ultrasound in January this year, there was a
tumor the size of our house in my blood right there.
(21:56):
It just propped from nowhere. I remember we did the
ultras on, the pelvic ultras on, and that the person
we found in in that radiology department. This person turned
the screen and he told me, did you know you
have a tumor? I was like, no, I I've never
(22:17):
seen it. Like I even told him I've done an
ultrasound a couple of months ago. Where has it been.
It was like, it's right here, it is crashing your
right kidney. That's why there was a lot of pain
on like on my right side. My right kidney was swollen.
(22:37):
I was so shocked. I was, oh my goodness. He
even called like his colleague into the room and he
was like, this is doctor something something. I had to
call him so that he can see that he can
see what I'm seeing. And they discussed for a couple
of minutes there. I just remember being shocked. I have
(23:00):
never seen this tumor, never been told about tumor. They
asked me, did you know your right kidney was sollen?
I told him I did not know. Did you know
your left your left kidney is blocked. I did not know.
No one has ever told me this, one as ever
done tests to check this. When they were done, nothing
(23:25):
showed up. I remember they asked me who my doctor
was and I told him that I told them the name,
and they were like, you in safe hands. Just take
this to him. He'll know what to do next. And
we went back to my doctor and he was like,
I told you this is unclear. I told you this
(23:46):
is not normal. It's not a normal situation. Everything mentioned
here last time just prove that there's something very wrong.
And when we showed him there results, he was like,
we need to act first now because we don't know
what this tumor is, but we do know that it's
(24:06):
causing a lot of pain. So he said, let's do
a scan. Let's see is this tumor only inside the
bladder and if it's big, how big is it is
it outside the bladder? Has it affected other areas? And
we did go first scan immediately with my sister, and
(24:30):
unfortunately found that the tumor was not only inside the bladder,
but it had grown so much that he was even
outside the bladder. And I was like, okay, well this
is proper hell and we went back to my doctor.
I was still in excruciating pain. It's very aggressive pain.
(24:52):
And when we did go back to my doctor, he
was like, the following day, let's go to theater and
let's remove part of this. You might know what's happening,
like is it benign?
Speaker 3 (25:04):
Is it?
Speaker 2 (25:04):
Like? Is it benign? Is it malignant malignancy? Meaning cancer?
So I was like, okay, okay, that's not bad, is it.
I was like, I'm here. You need to need to
be very calm and very be ready for the worst.
Like I was prepared for the worst. I was like,
even if it's malignant, if it's malignant tumor, if it's
(25:28):
it's it's meaning cancer. I was like, it's okay. I
have faith in this doctor. I feel like, even if
it's cancer, he'll know what to do. And he took
me to theater and put me on very nice medication
that was a very strong medication like the likes of morphine,
and I was in heaven. I was I would not
(25:51):
recommend because might get addicted. But for the first time
in a while, I was in zero pin. This doctor mete.
I was in zero pin before going into theater. I
was like, now we can go. Now, it's good time.
Let's go. We've put fentanil, We've put morephine in your system,
and I was so happy. Took me to theater. I recovered,
(26:13):
and after recovery, we went back to see him. We
went back to see a very sad face. He was
not as bright as when I met him. My doctor
on this day, there were more people in his office. Immediately,
I think your brain just registers that there can't be
five people in the room to tell you don't have cancer.
So I was like, oh, well, well, yeah we are.
(26:37):
And my mom was present that day and got into
the office and my doctor was well, he didn't even
say hi. I was just like, oh, welcome, welcome, have
a seat, and I'm like a couple of people in
the room, and he said, I wish I had better
news for you. Unfortunately, it's a cancerrous tumor. I was
(26:57):
like zero emotion. I had zero emotion. I was like, yes, yes, next,
and he tells me. He proceeds to say it's a
rare cancer. So about one to five percent of the
world population get this type of cancer. It's called Squeamer's
cell carcinoma of the bladder. I told him, I've never
(27:19):
had such and he was like, it's okay because it's
a rare cancer. Being rare means now you need a
lot of people on board so that nothing goes wrong.
So he was like, it's a He was like, let's
just put it plainly. It's bladder cancer. And he told
(27:42):
me this, this tumor is not it's not a young tumor.
This tumor has been there. It has been cooking up
and cooking up and for it to grow to that
size where it has actually affected my reproductive system. So
(28:02):
it does not only it did not only affect my bladder,
it also affected my reproductive system. So it was like,
it has been there, it's not new. And I was like, okay, okay. Next,
like I was, I just wanted to know, like, what
is this person's game plan. You're a couple of people
in this office, And I was like, whatever it is,
(28:25):
I am ready because if we are here and we
are talking about it, that means that someone in this
room might have a solution, and I'm very ready to
hear that solution. Actually throw a couple of solutions at
midro Plan A, plan B. I am open to it.
Is it key or is it surgery. Very open to it,
(28:47):
and we had to give my mom a couple of minutes,
of course, to digest the news, and my doctor reassured her.
But I can tell you for a fact that not
even a single drop sat, tear drop, nothing like. I
was completely numb. I don't even was scared. I do
(29:09):
not know why, but I did not respond to this news.
What I was looking forward to is for someone to
tell me we do have a planning place. I what
would have scared me and I would have broke down
and cried my eyes out, is someone telling me it's
too late. Now that you now that you don't want
(29:31):
to hear you don't want to hear that. Unfortunately, it's
too late. We cannot do much for you. When he
said that, they sat down and they came up with
a plan. I was so happy. I was like, oh God,
there's hope.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
There's room for.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
Me to actually have a normal life. And after years
and years of medications and doctors, you're actually happy to
have a final diagnosis like you're no long these we're
no longer moving with the news of narrow urethra or oveiances.
(30:06):
There's just a tumor that has been seated in your abdomin,
affecting your bladder in your reproductive system. I was so happy.
I was relieved. I was like, finally someone took time,
listened to me and said, we have to do more
comprehensive tests. This is not normal. Now it was beginning
(30:27):
like the treatment plan. Being a urologist, he could not
work on his own, so he had he asked me
for permission to present my case to the tumor board
in their hospital. So these people, specially through treat cancer,
that is oncologists, they are present a team of that
(30:48):
is a bode of that people get to decide what
will happen. I was like, okay, now what do you
need for you know, so that you present my case.
So that meant more tests have to be done. You
have to do an AMA right to know which stage
cancer is. You have to do something called a pet scan.
Where can I really explain what a petscan does. A
(31:10):
petscan is done to ensure that the cancer cells in
your body. For me, especially for my case, they are
to ensure that the cancer cells are only in the abdomen.
So this test is done little like a full body scan,
so that before they start treatment. They have to make
sure that they're not cancer cells in your lungs or
your liver. They're only present worthy, you know, just the abdomin.
(31:33):
So before they start, they have to make sure we're
only concentrating on the abdomin. We're not. We're not dealing
with lung cancer. We're dealing with colon cancer, like just
blood a cancer. And that was it. I was like, okay, okay,
that's fine. So with this test, you was able to
present my case. And even with presenting this case, this
doctor was kind enough to talk to them about welfare support.
(31:57):
So he told them that SES a young lady currently jobless.
We talked to them and he was able to convince
them that in case of treatment like chemo, they can cover.
I can get to undergo free chemo. They have a
free chemo program. So I was not aware. We got
(32:18):
a call from the welfare support people in Nagacan and
they were like, your doctor has put in a request
for you, so we need, you know, bank statements and
pass statements just to make sure how much we can cover.
Like they want to know how much we can cover
and how much they can do for me. And I
was like, oh my god, this person is heaven sent,
(32:39):
so this is something he did. When he presented the
case to the tumor board, he decided also he didn't
want to do. What made me happy also is that
this person was not doing things blindly. So he got
a gay nacologist on board because he was like, if
it has affected your productive system, we need to find
someone we'll take care of that. And also got like
(33:01):
one of the oncologists on board also so that he
doesn't do things blindly, gets to consult them. And I
got to meet all of them. And after the tumor
board discussed, I was very anxious because we knew that
the next appointment would be told. It said that we're
doing chemo, we're doing radiotherapy, or we are surgery. We
(33:27):
have to get rid of a couple of organs that
are affected together with the tumor. I was like, okay, okay,
that's that's fine. None of these options are easy. I have.
I have. I come from our family where cancer is genetic.
(33:49):
So when you tell me the options, I have seen
for myself the effects of these options. So even before
so when he went to present the case to the BOOD,
of course I was asked a million questions. This oncologist
asked me a million questions. This ecologists asked me a
million question and so did my doctor. And in the
(34:09):
process they realized cancer is common in my mom, in
my family, especially my mom's side, my matern out side,
and for us, you know, we've never really thought much
about it. And for them, they were like, this is
a very important point. It was like, this might be
a genetic abnormality that caused cancer at twenty five and
(34:31):
that is why I was explaining to them. I was like, oh, oh,
my bad. And I was telling them I am probably
the sixth cancer patient in my family now. And what
really caught the attention is that my grandma, my grandmother,
(34:52):
that is them on my mom's side, she passed away
about three years ago, ah, due to cancer. And was like,
due to genetics, might have gotten it from her. And
they even asked, they were asking questions about around my mom,
(35:14):
her siblings and her cousins if either of them has
ever been affected, and they were even advising can they
go get tested as early as now. So of course
they were asking the age of this of the patient
and the type of cancer. And for me, it was
very for me, it was unique because of course not
(35:35):
in a good way. But for my grandmother, they were older.
My grandmother was in her seventies and for its what
colon cancer. So colon cancer is the one that's very
compon in my mom's side, on my mom's side, and
for me, I was For me, it was like, you've
had a sick bladder, so probably this is why it
(35:58):
was very easy for it to be a host to
these cells. And I was like, okay, okay, when you're
thinking chemotherapy, I have seen members of my family who
are still undergoing chemotherapy. So the anxiety comes with you
have seen the effects of all these options. I have
seen the effects of someone who has undergone surgery to
(36:21):
lose a couple of organs. It's not easy. I have
seen my grandma who was and I went surgery and
didn't make it after the surgery, and I realized, not
even the cancer that kidns you, it's just the pain
(36:42):
it causes. And I was like okay. And I even
before they told me, I really knew that radiotherapy is
the most painful form of cancer treatment. It cooks your
organs just radiation. You're exposed to radiation and it ends
up even cooking the cooking the organs that it was
(37:03):
not supposed to cook. They decided, you know, and Kia
is young, she can handle surgery. Let's do the first
first of all, Like it was the first time they
did this type of surgery, like a cunt, and I
was like, oh, gonna give me a pick. That's not bad,
is it? So I was like, Okay, that doesn't that's
not stressful.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
Catch more African stories in the next episode of Legally Cullous.
That was part two of Akiya's story. The final part,
part three, goes out next week on Monday on this show,
So make sure you subscribe so you don't miss out
on it. I feel like one thing that's said with
me after listening to part two is how life changing
(37:43):
it can be to truly be listened to. And it's
so unfortunate that very many African women or Black women,
the stats show this, and not listened to in in
healthcare in hospitals, like even just something like pain, it's
assumed where overreact like nan, no, you okay, even when
you're saying, bro, I am dying. This pain is a lot.
(38:06):
The research shows that black women are often ignored, not
listened to not taken seriously in health care spaces, like
in hospitals or by health care practitioners. I remember seeing
this TikTok of a woman who said that she went
to see a gynecologist, a guy, and I think she
(38:28):
wanted an IUD placed in her or something. There was
a procedure that needed to be done, and it wasn't
sugery or anything, but she did ask the receptionists and
the nurse like, okay, so what's the pain policy here?
Like do you numb me when I'm undergoing this process?
(38:50):
And they were like, no, the pain like the policy
here is that you don't get numbed for that. The
doctor said that the doctor is a guy who's never
experienced this, but procedure because it is primarily and only
for women, right, But yeah, we just we just don't
get listened to it. And once you find a doctor who listens,
(39:10):
it's such a relief, right, a doctor who sees you.
I mean for years, Ki was like, something is not right.
Can you imagine having to explain your symptoms over and
over and over and it feels like people are not
taking it seriously. Imagine if they listened when she was
younger and how early they would have caught the tumor.
(39:31):
And honestly, I think that's the takeaway I'm sitting is
for this story. It's just like, never underestimate what it
means to listen to people when they tell you they're
in pain, whether it's a child, a friend, a partner,
a patient, or even you yourself. Don't dismiss your own pain,
you know, because like healing can truly just starts properly
(39:54):
when someone says, I hear you, and my goodness, her
resilience is just something else despite everything she endured, and
Care never stopped searching for answers, you know. And in
part three we speak treatment and we speak where she
is now. So make sure you subscribe so you don't
(40:14):
miss out on part three. It's the final part which
will be out next Monday. If un Care story resonated
with you, please share this with somebody who you feel
needs to hear it. But also if you want to
share your story, your African, your story is valid and
we want to hear it, fill out our storytellerform. A
link to it is in the show notes. One of
(40:34):
our correspondents is going to get back to you. Thank
you so so much for listening to this episode to
the very end. I truly appreciate you. I truly believe
that you have every single thing it takes to heal.
That's it for this episode of Legally Clueless. You can
share this podcast with your friends. You can keep it
for yourself. I'm not judging. Just make sure you're here
(40:56):
next week for the next episode.
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