May 23, 2023 • 15 mins
Should You Keep A Relationship With Your Ex’s Child?
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Speaker 1 (00:04):
It's topic times called eight hundred and five five five
one to join into the discussion with the Breakfast.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Club morning everybody you see j n V. Charlamagne the God.
We are the Breakfast Club because Jess Hilarious is here. Now,
somebody emailed Jess and wanted them to fix their mess. Now, Jess,
what was the email?
Speaker 3 (00:23):
What was the question?
Speaker 4 (00:24):
So it was it was very broad.
Speaker 5 (00:25):
But basically, this girl has a boyfriend who uh uh,
she does well. She has a baby father, and they
are somewhat similar to me and Rome situation. They're very
very cool clothes, they do business together, and her boyfriend
has a child that he is attached to from a
previous relationship that's not his biological daughter, but he still
(00:47):
is very attached to where they were only in a
relationship for a year and he grew attached to this
little girl and he kind of uses that as leverage
for the girlfriend being cool with her baby daddy.
Speaker 6 (00:58):
And for people who just might be lose live to
the breast Club.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Roome is just his baby's father, yes, with their like
brother and sisters.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
Yes, it is her baby daddy.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Brother right, Yes, So I mean I really would say,
once you break up with the mom, especially, that's not
your child. You break up with that baby too. They
only been together one year, Yeah, that's I feel. And
the baby got a father, Yeah, baby has a father.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Yeah, I'm sure the woman is dating somebody else.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Yes, So not all three of us gonna be at
the all three of us in the mom gonna be
at the graduation. So no, once you break up with
that mom, you break up with the baby, especially if
it's only been a year, Like, you gotta let that
baby go, that's not your child. But also in a
new situation, I would look at that different. You gotta
set boundaries. You just can't.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
You can't.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
You and your baby father can't be all cool and
together and shop. Nah, like this is a new relationship.
I respect what you have together, but this ain't this
one big family.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
And it ain't even no time a year a year
like firt of all, he shouldn't even be meeting your
child after the year, and how you grow a bond
with a whole child and a year?
Speaker 5 (01:52):
First of all, I can't hide no nigga from my
child for a year grown, so you know. Yeah, But
and then the little girl was like nine ten, you know,
she's older so it's like, yo, all right, like she
already knows her father. She spent the last year with
one year with you, and yeah, you kids are very impressionable.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
You're a good guy. He's good with kids and stuff,
and that's cool.
Speaker 6 (02:11):
But do you really know a person after the year
have them aun?
Speaker 4 (02:14):
And then why is your mom trying to be the
dad collector? This is not what.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (02:19):
We're not gonna do that, you know.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Let's go to the full life. Hello, who's this.
Speaker 7 (02:26):
Georgia?
Speaker 3 (02:27):
What's up? What's your thoughts?
Speaker 5 (02:28):
Man?
Speaker 7 (02:29):
I'll say, man, I don't feel like that's right, because.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
When when you're in a relationship and you start something new,
you don't want to bring on leugage from the path
back and tend to kindle something.
Speaker 6 (02:40):
You know what I'm saying, So leave that baggage. And
I appreciate that y'all be breaking up with kids. Boy,
y'all cold.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
But she got a dad and now she got because
the mom is dating someone else.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
I think justice right? Three dads said dad r. Let's
just say that collecting like that, like, Hello, Georgia, mama,
what's your thoughts?
Speaker 7 (03:03):
My thoughts are if she's entering a relationships. She does
need to spend some boundaries with her baby father, but
it also sounds like he's just being petty.
Speaker 8 (03:14):
Yeah, and the only reason he only wants to be
around the little girl is because she's around her baby father.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
That's what it sounds like. Down a baby.
Speaker 8 (03:23):
Yeah, don't you sound like you care about the little girl.
Speaker 7 (03:25):
He just wanted to kiss off his girl for yeah.
Speaker 5 (03:28):
Yeah, yeah, it sounds like that because she said he
uses it as leverage.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Because you love somebody, you accept everything that comes with him, right. Yeah,
Like if you if somebody loves Jess, you gotta accept
the child. They gotta accept Roome, They gotta accept everybody.
Speaker 4 (03:43):
Except room, yo, because you always make things, you gotta
do it.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
You gotta accept Room.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
But also people gotta understand if somebody is dating somebody
with a baby daddy and the baby daddy's cool. A
lot of times, the baby daddy's cool because you want
as close as normal the child.
Speaker 6 (04:01):
My child is still under age.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
I'm gonna be here, bro, that's right because you want
the child to feel comfortable. And like, no, I can
call my mom, I can call my dad. My mom
and dad are cool. I should come to them. Now,
this new gentleman is here. I got it that he's
dated my mom and I respect him. But you still want,
you know, to feel as normal as possible.
Speaker 5 (04:16):
Yeah, and telling you my my son loves me and
his dad's relationship and he loves that.
Speaker 6 (04:21):
How do you feel when other guy's come around?
Speaker 4 (04:24):
I mean, I don't introduce him to everybody.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
Make you seem like guy's coming around all the time.
Speaker 4 (04:29):
I collect don't listen to shut up?
Speaker 3 (04:39):
Hello this m what's your thoughts?
Speaker 7 (04:43):
I'm sorry I couldn't hear you.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
I said, what's your thoughts?
Speaker 5 (04:46):
Mom?
Speaker 3 (04:46):
Your dad? Collector?
Speaker 8 (04:47):
Okay, so my thoughts are uh. I definitely think that
after only a year and a half of stating someone
that you shouldn't even have a bond with the child.
Speaker 3 (04:57):
I agree.
Speaker 8 (04:58):
I think a lot of problems with people that are
dating that you know have children. They just introduce their
kids to people too. I mean, maybe like a high
in vibe maybe passed by, but an eight year old
and a man like absolutely not. So he needs to
win hisself off and the mom released a thing better
next time, Like you wouldn't have this problem if you want.
Speaker 7 (05:20):
To introduce your child before you really even knew the person.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
But I kind of disagree though, Like if if a
woman is dating a man, and the woman has sole
custody of that child, right, So that means if a
woman is dating, you know, at first to get serious,
and then they start going out a lot. So when
I go out a lot, what am I gonna leave
my son at home?
Speaker 3 (05:36):
My son?
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Know, after after a while, six seven, eight months, you
start taking your child with you because you want to
see how that man is with your child.
Speaker 6 (05:43):
So that's so.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Now I disagree with you.
Speaker 4 (05:47):
I don't think that's so.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Now you go out a lot, and if that person,
if you really into that person, just think about when
you started dating your wife. I started dating my wife.
We were around each other a lot. And if you
have a child, a young child at the time that's
eight nine, you're gonna be taking that child to plays
and games and this and that.
Speaker 5 (06:03):
Because this is not just somebody that you just hitting
and missing, you know what I'm saying. This is somebody
that you may not see yourself with them for the
rest of your life. But it's like, all right, I
mean I'm feeling you see.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
What you need to. You don't feel like you're gonna
be with the present for the rest of your life.
You gotta get this man from time.
Speaker 5 (06:19):
So why I said, I don't introduce everybody to ash,
But when I feel like there's like, okay, this, this
is like something and you're giving me butterflies and I'm
actually talking to people about you, I do feel like
there is something, you know. So when a girl gets
that feeling would a long time.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
So she feels like that right.
Speaker 5 (06:38):
And she's she's gonna bring that. I don't think it's
wrong with her introducing.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
The depending on how tight that relationship.
Speaker 5 (06:44):
But it's up to the guy. Yo, if it's done,
it's done. After a year or a year.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
And a half. Wean yourself off the baby.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
I'm not saying just completely cut yourself out, but wean
yourself off. It didn't even explain. So if she you
that close with a look, your mom collected me. So
we're done.
Speaker 3 (07:07):
Question is what's the question? Breaking down again? It's a
lot going on. Oh my god, should you.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
Stop being cool with your and your exes family for
your new man, den Bar, it's just ever gonna be
able to find you happiness because room's in your life.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Shut up, man, we'll take your calls when we come
back about me. It's the Breakfast Club. Good morning, more
thing everybody. It's dj n V Charlamage the God we
are the Breakfast Club. Jess Hilarious is here now if
you just join us. We're asking eight hundred and five
eight five one on five one.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
What's the question? Okay, there's a lot of moving parts, so.
Speaker 4 (07:35):
All right, Charlamagne, what is the question? What would you say?
Speaker 1 (07:37):
I thought it was, you know, basically, should you stop
being cool with your ex and you know your ex's
family for your new man?
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Do you cut off a child from a previous relationship
going into a new relationship if it's not biologically yours?
Speaker 3 (07:53):
There you go boom.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Yeah, I think you do, depending on how close you
and the child does so, if you raise that child,
let's say you've been with that person for eight to
ten years, different saying because we're just a question, but
if you ask a question, you gotta have boundaries.
Speaker 3 (08:09):
You gotta explain. If it's long time and.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
You raised the child, yes, I think you should still
be in that child's life, but it was only a
year like this situation, Yeah, I just say that'll disagreed.
Speaker 4 (08:20):
I didn't disagree and be dead.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
But I didn't disagree. Yes you did, I didn't. You
actually did. No.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
You said a year was too soon to introduce to
the child. I'm like, yeah, it might not be too send.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
You disagree with a car show, throw my own car show?
Is that what you're gonna do?
Speaker 8 (08:36):
Better?
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Start with that?
Speaker 3 (08:37):
Is that what you're gonna do? Well?
Speaker 2 (08:40):
My call shows this Sunday, By the way, Memphis made
five and under a free there's gonna be calls from
young Dolph, Key Glock, fifty cent Bunpy, and myself.
Speaker 3 (08:48):
If you haven't got your tickets, to get your tickets now.
I can't wait to see you in Memphis. All right, Now,
let's get to the fore.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Hoo Hans, Hello, who's this for making?
Speaker 8 (08:57):
Hey?
Speaker 3 (08:58):
Jay, talk to us. What's your thoughts?
Speaker 7 (09:00):
Okay, So I got two things. First thing is, Jessica,
I'm so glad you're on there this morning because you
always give good insight.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
Never one.
Speaker 7 (09:09):
But just tell your friends that he is a placeholder
for him, that dude is still trying to show up
for the head and hope that she'll see oh he did.
He's that type of father to somebody that's not even
his that's not even his real child, and I can
take him back. He's going number two and he I
know you were the one to answer the pull. The
(09:30):
fact that you talked out and said the extremes are
either they got to be beefing like Christ and blood
as baby mama baby daddy, or the opposite of that
is big, happy family and everybody living in the same house.
There are so many levels between that when it comes
to relationships between parents, and just told you that they
(09:50):
have businesses together and things like that, so they can't
communicate and have a healthy relationship. One of the biggest
things about both character is respect, respect of the other,
charent respect of their.
Speaker 8 (10:01):
Relationships and all of that.
Speaker 7 (10:04):
There's levels to it. It does not mean that they
are infinitely involved and there's anything going on under the table.
There are levels to it. And speaking for the faith
that you can't pop from because all your kids are with.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Here, correct, I can't.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
I can't relate, Frank, but either.
Speaker 7 (10:21):
Of y'all can't relate. But y'all also have both stepped
out on your wife.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Whoa whoa, whoa whoa?
Speaker 6 (10:26):
What you bringing up old stuff? Both stuff?
Speaker 3 (10:36):
Man? Okay, continue, I'm just saying.
Speaker 7 (10:40):
I'm going to be seventeen this year. He and her
dad do business together. We have not had any dealings
since I was pregnant with her. It's just right this year.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
That's right.
Speaker 7 (10:52):
There's a mutual respect and understanding that I have for
his relationships and situations and that he has for mine
as well. But we we do not our, We don't fight,
We don't do any of that.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
What does your new man think about it?
Speaker 7 (11:05):
He don't have a problem with it because they've been introduced.
They we spend time together on holidays, all day. It's
no problem. If you create any man that is creating
drama and bringing that into my face, my energy, my family,
she wouldn't be there anyway.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
That's right, that's right now. I agree with everything she said.
Speaker 6 (11:21):
I'm gonna tell you something that's interesting.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
There's been such a negative narrative around baby Mama's and
baby daddy that we always expect it to be drama.
Speaker 6 (11:29):
So when I see situations like justin Rome and how.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
They co parents as well, I didn't know it was
so many people out here cole parenting so well.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
But co parenting is not the problem. I don't anybody
you have to co parent. That's not the problem. The
problem is when cordial cold parents, like actually being friends.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
That's that's not the problem.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
The problem is when I feel like they cross the lines, right,
And sometimes I feel like people cross the lines in
that situation, Like with the individual that you said, I
feel like he's crossing the lines, meaning they've only been
together a short period of time.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
There's no reason to still be in that child's life
like that.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
That child has a father, that child has a new
boyfriend that the mom has, So it's to the point
now where there's no reason to be this.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
It's just what makes sense. Yeah, you know, in my opinion.
Speaker 5 (12:11):
And then also, we're not talking about me girl from
making Georgia, you sure, yeah, because you see how she personalized.
She was like, just so tell your friend that you
and your baby father, like y'all.
Speaker 6 (12:22):
Do sound personal And when you were describing it, you
were saying.
Speaker 4 (12:25):
My mask, I told you people write me all the time.
Speaker 6 (12:28):
Slipping up said, I wrote myself, and I told myself.
Speaker 5 (12:30):
And slipping up first, I didn't know you stepped out.
What's what happened with you in the marriage? Okay, thank you,
I'm moving on this. Yeah, yeah, we know about one personalitation?
Speaker 3 (12:41):
What about yours? Did you write that in the little book?
I did? Shook it th one? What's the marl of
the story?
Speaker 6 (12:48):
The moral of the story.
Speaker 5 (12:50):
Don't don't use no damn leverage. The moral of the
story is, look everything you do not bring. And then
it's kind of hard to say, don't bring baggage from
other relationships, because I'm not trying to say anyone's child
is baggage.
Speaker 4 (13:04):
My thing is, I would never say that. The thing
is you have to. It's so. It's because I'm so
conflicted on it.
Speaker 5 (13:11):
It's like you have to be open enough to bring
all the facts before you get into enough relationship.
Speaker 4 (13:17):
This is what I had going on here.
Speaker 5 (13:19):
It's gonna be hard breaking his bumb with this little girl,
but you gotta be willing to try to do that,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
Let's say that the situation was with you, right, and
you met a new man you loved, but he just
he felt uncomfortable. He felt that you and Rome were
too close with each other. Y'all spoke too much because
you were in a relationship.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
Y'all didn't.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
No, I'm never gonna cut Rome.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
But let's say you wanted to set boundaries to make
sure he was comfortable.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
I do get that. Look it happened. It happened before.
Speaker 5 (13:47):
Rome used to call me anytime of the night, and
I used to answer any time of the night.
Speaker 1 (13:51):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (13:52):
You used to have a real bad drinking problem, fall
asleep behind the wheel. This ain't nothing to everybody, don't know,
but like, you know what I mean. So I would
go get him. I would since somebody get any thing.
But I was also enabling him a lot and then
just too accessible for him, which also like spoiled them
a lot. So I did set boundaries myself. And even
it was a guy that was like, yo, this calling
he was one o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
I mean me and you in bed at one o'clock
in the morning and you pick him up. I'm a
feeling the way.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
No, I never did that, but that's when I did
set the boundaries. When this guy did say, yo, this,
this is a lot, and I'm like, all right, you're right.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
So no, Rome, don't.
Speaker 5 (14:25):
Call me at de nine, don't call me after that.
Even when you call me about advice, I would say,
just kind of lay off. I'm talking to this guy
and like it's like this, we you do cross boundaries
and I'll let you allow you so it's not all
your fault.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
But we got we gotta chill.
Speaker 6 (14:39):
I understand what the thing. But if Room need help,
like you know, he don't want to.
Speaker 4 (14:45):
I have to, like you come with me if you want.
Speaker 3 (14:47):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (14:48):
But like that's my friend, that's my family, just like
it's different.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
The new Man.
Speaker 6 (14:52):
Don't understand that.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
You got to build a wall.
Speaker 6 (14:54):
Build a wall between the new Man and the baby Daddy.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Don't don't do it. Justice, let me just let it go.
Sad bound Bi, what are you just taking about?
Speaker 6 (15:02):
Jess got you all?
Speaker 3 (15:03):
Just let it go.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Justice, look at what Jess with the mess is up next?
We got some room, miss, Yeah, we got some rooms.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
We'll get to it. Nexus. Just justice, don't even just
liter me. Yeah, we'll be back at the breakfast club.
Good morning,
It's topic times called eight hundred and five five five
one to join into the discussion with the Breakfast.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Club morning everybody you see j n V. Charlamagne the God.
We are the Breakfast Club because Jess Hilarious is here. Now,
somebody emailed Jess and wanted them to fix their mess. Now, Jess,
what was the email?
Speaker 3 (00:23):
What was the question?
Speaker 4 (00:24):
So it was it was very broad.
Speaker 5 (00:25):
But basically, this girl has a boyfriend who uh uh,
she does well. She has a baby father, and they
are somewhat similar to me and Rome situation. They're very
very cool clothes, they do business together, and her boyfriend
has a child that he is attached to from a
previous relationship that's not his biological daughter, but he still
(00:47):
is very attached to where they were only in a
relationship for a year and he grew attached to this
little girl and he kind of uses that as leverage
for the girlfriend being cool with her baby daddy.
Speaker 6 (00:58):
And for people who just might be lose live to
the breast Club.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Roome is just his baby's father, yes, with their like
brother and sisters.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
Yes, it is her baby daddy.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Brother right, Yes, So I mean I really would say,
once you break up with the mom, especially, that's not
your child. You break up with that baby too. They
only been together one year, Yeah, that's I feel. And
the baby got a father, Yeah, baby has a father.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Yeah, I'm sure the woman is dating somebody else.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Yes, So not all three of us gonna be at
the all three of us in the mom gonna be
at the graduation. So no, once you break up with
that mom, you break up with the baby, especially if
it's only been a year, Like, you gotta let that
baby go, that's not your child. But also in a
new situation, I would look at that different. You gotta
set boundaries. You just can't.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
You can't.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
You and your baby father can't be all cool and
together and shop. Nah, like this is a new relationship.
I respect what you have together, but this ain't this
one big family.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
And it ain't even no time a year a year
like firt of all, he shouldn't even be meeting your
child after the year, and how you grow a bond
with a whole child and a year?
Speaker 5 (01:52):
First of all, I can't hide no nigga from my
child for a year grown, so you know. Yeah, But
and then the little girl was like nine ten, you know,
she's older so it's like, yo, all right, like she
already knows her father. She spent the last year with
one year with you, and yeah, you kids are very impressionable.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
You're a good guy. He's good with kids and stuff,
and that's cool.
Speaker 6 (02:11):
But do you really know a person after the year
have them aun?
Speaker 4 (02:14):
And then why is your mom trying to be the
dad collector? This is not what.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (02:19):
We're not gonna do that, you know.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Let's go to the full life. Hello, who's this.
Speaker 7 (02:26):
Georgia?
Speaker 3 (02:27):
What's up? What's your thoughts?
Speaker 5 (02:28):
Man?
Speaker 7 (02:29):
I'll say, man, I don't feel like that's right, because.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
When when you're in a relationship and you start something new,
you don't want to bring on leugage from the path
back and tend to kindle something.
Speaker 6 (02:40):
You know what I'm saying, So leave that baggage. And
I appreciate that y'all be breaking up with kids. Boy,
y'all cold.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
But she got a dad and now she got because
the mom is dating someone else.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
I think justice right? Three dads said dad r. Let's
just say that collecting like that, like, Hello, Georgia, mama,
what's your thoughts?
Speaker 7 (03:03):
My thoughts are if she's entering a relationships. She does
need to spend some boundaries with her baby father, but
it also sounds like he's just being petty.
Speaker 8 (03:14):
Yeah, and the only reason he only wants to be
around the little girl is because she's around her baby father.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
That's what it sounds like. Down a baby.
Speaker 8 (03:23):
Yeah, don't you sound like you care about the little girl.
Speaker 7 (03:25):
He just wanted to kiss off his girl for yeah.
Speaker 5 (03:28):
Yeah, yeah, it sounds like that because she said he
uses it as leverage.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Because you love somebody, you accept everything that comes with him, right. Yeah,
Like if you if somebody loves Jess, you gotta accept
the child. They gotta accept Roome, They gotta accept everybody.
Speaker 4 (03:43):
Except room, yo, because you always make things, you gotta
do it.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
You gotta accept Room.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
But also people gotta understand if somebody is dating somebody
with a baby daddy and the baby daddy's cool. A
lot of times, the baby daddy's cool because you want
as close as normal the child.
Speaker 6 (04:01):
My child is still under age.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
I'm gonna be here, bro, that's right because you want
the child to feel comfortable. And like, no, I can
call my mom, I can call my dad. My mom
and dad are cool. I should come to them. Now,
this new gentleman is here. I got it that he's
dated my mom and I respect him. But you still want,
you know, to feel as normal as possible.
Speaker 5 (04:16):
Yeah, and telling you my my son loves me and
his dad's relationship and he loves that.
Speaker 6 (04:21):
How do you feel when other guy's come around?
Speaker 4 (04:24):
I mean, I don't introduce him to everybody.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
Make you seem like guy's coming around all the time.
Speaker 4 (04:29):
I collect don't listen to shut up?
Speaker 3 (04:39):
Hello this m what's your thoughts?
Speaker 7 (04:43):
I'm sorry I couldn't hear you.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
I said, what's your thoughts?
Speaker 5 (04:46):
Mom?
Speaker 3 (04:46):
Your dad? Collector?
Speaker 8 (04:47):
Okay, so my thoughts are uh. I definitely think that
after only a year and a half of stating someone
that you shouldn't even have a bond with the child.
Speaker 3 (04:57):
I agree.
Speaker 8 (04:58):
I think a lot of problems with people that are
dating that you know have children. They just introduce their
kids to people too. I mean, maybe like a high
in vibe maybe passed by, but an eight year old
and a man like absolutely not. So he needs to
win hisself off and the mom released a thing better
next time, Like you wouldn't have this problem if you want.
Speaker 7 (05:20):
To introduce your child before you really even knew the person.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
But I kind of disagree though, Like if if a
woman is dating a man, and the woman has sole
custody of that child, right, So that means if a
woman is dating, you know, at first to get serious,
and then they start going out a lot. So when
I go out a lot, what am I gonna leave
my son at home?
Speaker 3 (05:36):
My son?
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Know, after after a while, six seven, eight months, you
start taking your child with you because you want to
see how that man is with your child.
Speaker 6 (05:43):
So that's so.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Now I disagree with you.
Speaker 4 (05:47):
I don't think that's so.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Now you go out a lot, and if that person,
if you really into that person, just think about when
you started dating your wife. I started dating my wife.
We were around each other a lot. And if you
have a child, a young child at the time that's
eight nine, you're gonna be taking that child to plays
and games and this and that.
Speaker 5 (06:03):
Because this is not just somebody that you just hitting
and missing, you know what I'm saying. This is somebody
that you may not see yourself with them for the
rest of your life. But it's like, all right, I
mean I'm feeling you see.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
What you need to. You don't feel like you're gonna
be with the present for the rest of your life.
You gotta get this man from time.
Speaker 5 (06:19):
So why I said, I don't introduce everybody to ash,
But when I feel like there's like, okay, this, this
is like something and you're giving me butterflies and I'm
actually talking to people about you, I do feel like
there is something, you know. So when a girl gets
that feeling would a long time.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
So she feels like that right.
Speaker 5 (06:38):
And she's she's gonna bring that. I don't think it's
wrong with her introducing.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
The depending on how tight that relationship.
Speaker 5 (06:44):
But it's up to the guy. Yo, if it's done,
it's done. After a year or a year.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
And a half. Wean yourself off the baby.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
I'm not saying just completely cut yourself out, but wean
yourself off. It didn't even explain. So if she you
that close with a look, your mom collected me. So
we're done.
Speaker 3 (07:07):
Question is what's the question? Breaking down again? It's a
lot going on. Oh my god, should you.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
Stop being cool with your and your exes family for
your new man, den Bar, it's just ever gonna be
able to find you happiness because room's in your life.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Shut up, man, we'll take your calls when we come
back about me. It's the Breakfast Club. Good morning, more
thing everybody. It's dj n V Charlamage the God we
are the Breakfast Club. Jess Hilarious is here now if
you just join us. We're asking eight hundred and five
eight five one on five one.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
What's the question? Okay, there's a lot of moving parts, so.
Speaker 4 (07:35):
All right, Charlamagne, what is the question? What would you say?
Speaker 1 (07:37):
I thought it was, you know, basically, should you stop
being cool with your ex and you know your ex's
family for your new man?
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Do you cut off a child from a previous relationship
going into a new relationship if it's not biologically yours?
Speaker 3 (07:53):
There you go boom.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Yeah, I think you do, depending on how close you
and the child does so, if you raise that child,
let's say you've been with that person for eight to
ten years, different saying because we're just a question, but
if you ask a question, you gotta have boundaries.
Speaker 3 (08:09):
You gotta explain. If it's long time and.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
You raised the child, yes, I think you should still
be in that child's life, but it was only a
year like this situation, Yeah, I just say that'll disagreed.
Speaker 4 (08:20):
I didn't disagree and be dead.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
But I didn't disagree. Yes you did, I didn't. You
actually did. No.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
You said a year was too soon to introduce to
the child. I'm like, yeah, it might not be too send.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
You disagree with a car show, throw my own car show?
Is that what you're gonna do?
Speaker 8 (08:36):
Better?
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Start with that?
Speaker 3 (08:37):
Is that what you're gonna do? Well?
Speaker 2 (08:40):
My call shows this Sunday, By the way, Memphis made
five and under a free there's gonna be calls from
young Dolph, Key Glock, fifty cent Bunpy, and myself.
Speaker 3 (08:48):
If you haven't got your tickets, to get your tickets now.
I can't wait to see you in Memphis. All right, Now,
let's get to the fore.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Hoo Hans, Hello, who's this for making?
Speaker 8 (08:57):
Hey?
Speaker 3 (08:58):
Jay, talk to us. What's your thoughts?
Speaker 7 (09:00):
Okay, So I got two things. First thing is, Jessica,
I'm so glad you're on there this morning because you
always give good insight.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
Never one.
Speaker 7 (09:09):
But just tell your friends that he is a placeholder
for him, that dude is still trying to show up
for the head and hope that she'll see oh he did.
He's that type of father to somebody that's not even
his that's not even his real child, and I can
take him back. He's going number two and he I
know you were the one to answer the pull. The
(09:30):
fact that you talked out and said the extremes are
either they got to be beefing like Christ and blood
as baby mama baby daddy, or the opposite of that
is big, happy family and everybody living in the same house.
There are so many levels between that when it comes
to relationships between parents, and just told you that they
(09:50):
have businesses together and things like that, so they can't
communicate and have a healthy relationship. One of the biggest
things about both character is respect, respect of the other,
charent respect of their.
Speaker 8 (10:01):
Relationships and all of that.
Speaker 7 (10:04):
There's levels to it. It does not mean that they
are infinitely involved and there's anything going on under the table.
There are levels to it. And speaking for the faith
that you can't pop from because all your kids are with.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Here, correct, I can't.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
I can't relate, Frank, but either.
Speaker 7 (10:21):
Of y'all can't relate. But y'all also have both stepped
out on your wife.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Whoa whoa, whoa whoa?
Speaker 6 (10:26):
What you bringing up old stuff? Both stuff?
Speaker 3 (10:36):
Man? Okay, continue, I'm just saying.
Speaker 7 (10:40):
I'm going to be seventeen this year. He and her
dad do business together. We have not had any dealings
since I was pregnant with her. It's just right this year.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
That's right.
Speaker 7 (10:52):
There's a mutual respect and understanding that I have for
his relationships and situations and that he has for mine
as well. But we we do not our, We don't fight,
We don't do any of that.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
What does your new man think about it?
Speaker 7 (11:05):
He don't have a problem with it because they've been introduced.
They we spend time together on holidays, all day. It's
no problem. If you create any man that is creating
drama and bringing that into my face, my energy, my family,
she wouldn't be there anyway.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
That's right, that's right now. I agree with everything she said.
Speaker 6 (11:21):
I'm gonna tell you something that's interesting.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
There's been such a negative narrative around baby Mama's and
baby daddy that we always expect it to be drama.
Speaker 6 (11:29):
So when I see situations like justin Rome and how.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
They co parents as well, I didn't know it was
so many people out here cole parenting so well.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
But co parenting is not the problem. I don't anybody
you have to co parent. That's not the problem. The
problem is when cordial cold parents, like actually being friends.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
That's that's not the problem.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
The problem is when I feel like they cross the lines, right,
And sometimes I feel like people cross the lines in
that situation, Like with the individual that you said, I
feel like he's crossing the lines, meaning they've only been
together a short period of time.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
There's no reason to still be in that child's life
like that.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
That child has a father, that child has a new
boyfriend that the mom has, So it's to the point
now where there's no reason to be this.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
It's just what makes sense. Yeah, you know, in my opinion.
Speaker 5 (12:11):
And then also, we're not talking about me girl from
making Georgia, you sure, yeah, because you see how she personalized.
She was like, just so tell your friend that you
and your baby father, like y'all.
Speaker 6 (12:22):
Do sound personal And when you were describing it, you
were saying.
Speaker 4 (12:25):
My mask, I told you people write me all the time.
Speaker 6 (12:28):
Slipping up said, I wrote myself, and I told myself.
Speaker 5 (12:30):
And slipping up first, I didn't know you stepped out.
What's what happened with you in the marriage? Okay, thank you,
I'm moving on this. Yeah, yeah, we know about one personalitation?
Speaker 3 (12:41):
What about yours? Did you write that in the little book?
I did? Shook it th one? What's the marl of
the story?
Speaker 6 (12:48):
The moral of the story.
Speaker 5 (12:50):
Don't don't use no damn leverage. The moral of the
story is, look everything you do not bring. And then
it's kind of hard to say, don't bring baggage from
other relationships, because I'm not trying to say anyone's child
is baggage.
Speaker 4 (13:04):
My thing is, I would never say that. The thing
is you have to. It's so. It's because I'm so
conflicted on it.
Speaker 5 (13:11):
It's like you have to be open enough to bring
all the facts before you get into enough relationship.
Speaker 4 (13:17):
This is what I had going on here.
Speaker 5 (13:19):
It's gonna be hard breaking his bumb with this little girl,
but you gotta be willing to try to do that,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
Let's say that the situation was with you, right, and
you met a new man you loved, but he just
he felt uncomfortable. He felt that you and Rome were
too close with each other. Y'all spoke too much because
you were in a relationship.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
Y'all didn't.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
No, I'm never gonna cut Rome.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
But let's say you wanted to set boundaries to make
sure he was comfortable.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
I do get that. Look it happened. It happened before.
Speaker 5 (13:47):
Rome used to call me anytime of the night, and
I used to answer any time of the night.
Speaker 1 (13:51):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (13:52):
You used to have a real bad drinking problem, fall
asleep behind the wheel. This ain't nothing to everybody, don't know,
but like, you know what I mean. So I would
go get him. I would since somebody get any thing.
But I was also enabling him a lot and then
just too accessible for him, which also like spoiled them
a lot. So I did set boundaries myself. And even
it was a guy that was like, yo, this calling
he was one o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
I mean me and you in bed at one o'clock
in the morning and you pick him up. I'm a
feeling the way.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
No, I never did that, but that's when I did
set the boundaries. When this guy did say, yo, this,
this is a lot, and I'm like, all right, you're right.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
So no, Rome, don't.
Speaker 5 (14:25):
Call me at de nine, don't call me after that.
Even when you call me about advice, I would say,
just kind of lay off. I'm talking to this guy
and like it's like this, we you do cross boundaries
and I'll let you allow you so it's not all
your fault.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
But we got we gotta chill.
Speaker 6 (14:39):
I understand what the thing. But if Room need help,
like you know, he don't want to.
Speaker 4 (14:45):
I have to, like you come with me if you want.
Speaker 3 (14:47):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (14:48):
But like that's my friend, that's my family, just like
it's different.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
The new Man.
Speaker 6 (14:52):
Don't understand that.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
You got to build a wall.
Speaker 6 (14:54):
Build a wall between the new Man and the baby Daddy.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Don't don't do it. Justice, let me just let it go.
Sad bound Bi, what are you just taking about?
Speaker 6 (15:02):
Jess got you all?
Speaker 3 (15:03):
Just let it go.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Justice, look at what Jess with the mess is up next?
We got some room, miss, Yeah, we got some rooms.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
We'll get to it. Nexus. Just justice, don't even just
liter me. Yeah, we'll be back at the breakfast club.
Good morning,
The Breakfast Club News
Hosts And Creators
Charlamagne Tha God
DJ Envy
Jess Hilarious
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