Social Media

Episode Transcript

(00:05):
The Mojo ain't no good? What'sup, guys, Yeah, it's you,
It's me. What's going on?Mojo? What's up? Listen?
I'm I'm loving this and I can'twait to find out what Zach's topic is
going to be. But every weekfor the We Don't Podcast, everybody on

(00:27):
the show gets to host. Andthis is a quite a surprise, Zach
the more Mojo podcast. This isn'tthe we Don't podcast? Yes, what
did I say? You said wedon't? Oh, we don't, we
don't. You can host that oneto Zach, you can get them both.
What's going on? Guys? Today? We're going to be talking about

(00:49):
social media? And I know allof you follow me. If you don't
follow me, it's Zach Martian music. But here's the thing. I I
don't like social media. I amgetting really bad, crippling anxiety by seeing
it every day. I haven't postedsince February. As the days go on,

(01:12):
I think about, Oh, Ishould post this moment. Oh,
I work with great people, Ishould post this moment. We just took
show photos and I'm getting more andmore anxious on how I don't want to
post? Wait, what is therea reason like what's causing the anxiety?
I think, well, there's afew things. One, I feel like

(01:33):
I can never keep up right.I don't know if you guys feel it
this way, but like I justfeel like my life isn't as exciting to
post, and then there is likemultiple things that happen, and then I
can't post them all at once.Do you ever feel that way? I
know exactly what you're talking about.The reason that I started going to therapy
was over social media. Oh really, Actually it was one of the first

(01:55):
incentives to make the appointment. Itwas back to that it was having on
my mental health. Oh. Iquit social media quite a few times,
for like months at a time.I was crying too often over the things
people were saying about me online.And I'm kind of like you. I
felt like I couldn't keep up witheverybody and that everybody was only there to

(02:15):
ruin my day. And unfortunately,as a part of our job, we're
supposed to be very active on socialmedia, and it would lead me to
tears multiple times a week. Yeah, Zach, do you ever just look
at social media as a thing thatyou you know, like, uh do
occasionally? Like do you ever justlike just post what you gotta post,

(02:38):
Like if you post all three ofthem on the same day, do you
really care about the algorithms screwing up? I've never cared about the algorithms.
It's more like, well, there'sa few things. It's one, I
spell like shit, so like mypeople noticing your spell. Yeah, And
also I uh, I had likeI used to post a lot on Facebook,

(03:00):
and then I had a you know, like a breakup happened. And
but also my best friend passed awayand I didn't know that. Yeah,
and he stole my Facebook profile pictureif you ever wonder about that. But
I get I'm on time Hop,which is like it tells you everything that
you've done and like for years onsocial media, and every day I look

(03:22):
at that and I just get triggeredand it makes me not want to post
anymore things. I know, andI know, I just feel like,
I don't know, I can't can'thelp it for some reason. If you
guys, ever, I don't know, do you look at other people's lives
on social media and compare them toyour life? Oh? Not really?
I mean because when I heard peopledoing that, because I think that that
is a thing that everybody you know, majority of people do. Even if

(03:45):
they say they don't do, theycompare themselves like, Oh I didn't get
to do that right subconsciously probably yeah, Because I think that's a That's that's
why social media is so bad,is that people look at it and go,
oh, my life is not asgood as them. But I feel
like it's I feel like in aa lot of cases, social media is
the shined up version of people's lives. For sure. I feel like that's

(04:05):
the obvious reason that people that socialmedia gives people anxiety. But I also
think that we are now so gotaccustoms not the accustomed to is not the
word or phrase I want to use, but like it's just like normal.
Proto call that to your point,like if something big happens right away,

(04:27):
you're like you start stressing about whatthe post is going to be? Sure,
Like why has that been ingrained inour brains over the past couple of
years of you know, like okay, like we just like over the weekend.
All. He's a great example forme. I had this wedding and
I'm like, what, I gotall nervous at night of like what pictures
am I going to put? Whothe hell cares, do you know what
I mean? Like, that's notthat's not what that was all about.

(04:50):
But that's where our brain goes becausewe've been conditioned. That's where finally I
thought of it, because we've beenconditioned by ourselves, right and by everybody
else to do that, to thinkthat way. I think half the fun
of moments is living them, Andunfortunately, I think with social media we
think about what we're going to posteven before we have the moment. Yeah,

(05:10):
and then we don't like enjoy theactual moment, yes, because we're
too worried about taking the picture ofthe moment, you know. You know,
it's so sad. When I goout now with my dad and my
brother, they go, are wetaking the picture before or after? Like
it's not even fun. It's like, we know you need this, so
do you want to do it nowor it's inauthentic. Yeah. I stopped
being on social media with as muchregularity as I was in the past,

(05:34):
maybe about three to four weeks ago. And one of the things is you
realize the people that you actually havecontact with are not as many people as
you think you have contact with.Because social media is its own way of
keeping in contact and literally just seeingpeople. There are so many people I

(05:56):
haven't seen air quote since I haven'tbeen on social media. Thing is and
I was talking with Josiah about thistwo days ago. Is the amount of
different feelings and emotions that you cango through in the thirty second timeframe is
like unbelievable. I can be happyin a single scroll. I can be

(06:19):
jealous in the next girl, Ican be angered in the scroll after that,
I can be horny in the scroll. Like my body isn't meant to
go through that quick of a rolodexof emotions. I'm just like, we're
not built to do that, andwe're forcing ourselves to do that. And
I can't tell you like how muchlife has slowed down for me since being
off in like those three weeks andliterally just posting because I want to post

(06:43):
some shit real quick and then getthe fuck on. I v you.
I enview so bad. I wishI could delete all my social media,
but I literally can't because it's myjob and it's the worst thing ever.
And I'm gonna be so so transparentabout it. Like social media has changed
me in a sense where I donot like the person I am because I'm
so anxious about missing what I needto get for my work. It is

(07:03):
crippling, like I cannot sleep sometimesit sucks, like even yesterday, And
I'm gonna say this, like duringour show photos, I my own like
I felt like my own pictures didn'tturn out as well because I was so
worried about missing shots of what washappening around the room for like our social
recap, Like I felt like Ichanged into my outfit for like my single

(07:26):
shot, and then we started doingour group photoshot. I'm like, oh,
I didn't know that we were doingthis right now, so now I'm
in like single group shot for thegroup photo. And I was getting in
my head about it because had Ibeen paying attention, I would have known
that we were doing something different.And then it was just like it was
just from there. I was sofocused on making sure that I had camera

(07:46):
shots of everybody getting their photos takenthat I completely just disregarded like everything else
around me. And I feel likethat has just been a cycle. Yeah,
maybe ever since I got this job. Maybe when we do moments like
that, we don't need to havethe behind the scenes of the moment because
we already are paying a photographer tothe photography. Yeah, but then you
watch the video that we posted todayand you're so happy that you did.

(08:09):
What's more important? Now? What'smore important your The whole idea is to
catch a good photo of all ofus to use later for the social media.
Like I honestly I would, Iwould give up that video for your
own wellbeing of what's going on inmoments like that, Like I think that
there are there are times where Ithink you we have to prioritize what is

(08:30):
more important. It's like, forinstance, you know, with your with
Shannon, with your wedding, whatis more important the moment of your getting
married and knowing what Wes looked likein your own personal headspace or having the
pictures of that well for sure,And to be honest, I did not
take very many photos that day.It was more. It wasn't even that

(08:50):
because I was trying to live inthe moment. It was more the anticipation
of like what what do I postfrom this? You know what I mean?
Not even like trying to get agood picture there. It was more
because I didn't know all my goodpictures came from my friend, you know
what I think? Sucks with socialmedia, and you guys experienced this,

(09:11):
let me know, but I thinkwe all do that. You would look
at other people's social media and thenyou see them, and like keV said,
there's very few people that you talkto on a regular basis. You
see a person that you haven't physicallyseen in person in a long time,
and we have nothing to ask thembecause we know already about their lives.

(09:31):
And the best part of meeting somebodynew, like going and meeting somebody,
is being able to learn about themand find out what's going on with them.
And the problem is we already knowtoo much about the social media version
of them, and so I thinkthat sometimes, like I like, this
is funny. I have seen thismore and more. I don't know if
you guys have friends like this,but more and more people I know are

(09:54):
not on social media, and they'relike a couple of them are friends of
oh our son. They're like twentynine and twenty eight year old people and
they're not on social media. AndI'll say, well, let me hold
on, let me let me,uh, you know, get your social
media, and they're like, I'mnot on it. And they do that
because they just don't want to dealwith it. They were on at one

(10:15):
point, maybe in college or something, and then they said, fuck,
I don't need it. I'm notlike that's going to become more and more
of a popular thing. My brotheris doing it, yeah, really,
Yeah, he's not on any socialmedia. Yeah. And it's like I
feel like a lot of like theyounger generation too, is going to get
It's like the burnout is real,and I think that you're going to we're
going to start to see like arapid decline of people just running from from

(10:41):
these apps because it's it's made ourbrain so bad. Well, I think
it's interesting when you tell when peoplesay I have never in my life known
that people could have anxiety because theydidn't have anxiety when I was younger.
Well, I think that in alot of cases, they probably didn't have
anxiety when they're when you were youngerbecause you didn't have social media. And
I think so so media draws outanxiety. Also, I think people talking

(11:03):
about it makes you realize that thatthing you might have had has been anxiety.
Now, last question probably eat myfault. Okay, so another question
for you guys, because you guysdo this job right, and I'm looking
at Shannon, you know, Megan, KP Megan when you look at me,

(11:26):
Well, I was thinking about keV, but I don't know if I've
actually seen a keV thing. Butyou know, how you collaborate with you
know, Gardner White or whatever,Cambria or whatever. Do you feel oblige
or do you get stressed out becauseit is work? And do you feel
you're like, oh my god,like yes, yes, what is that
feeling? And how do you getover that? My well, you don't.
My expectations for myself are so muchlower than it when I feel like

(11:50):
other people rely on me and Ialready have my own expectations so high it
it stresses me out. Not ina bad way, like I'm so appreciative
of those opportunities, but I'm like, I know the pressure of when you
post what you post, the kindof interactions you get. If you get
a lot of attention on one postand then the client doesn't like, do

(12:11):
you feel like you let them down? And it's what if somebody says something
bad about that client that is yourclient and you're trying to take care of
in the comment, and then you'relike, what do I do in this
situation because you, like, youdon't want that for them. Yeah.
Yeah, it's real stressful. Sowhat do you do? You work with
people that we enjoy and places thatwe like, so like, I'm sorry

(12:33):
that you've had that experience, butI love it exactly. Yeah, and
then you text them and go,can do you want to respond to that?
Yeah? What do we do aboutit? You can't please everybody at
the end of the day, somepeople are going to be really excited,
some people are going to be disappointed. You can really only do your best,

(12:56):
and it's stressful in the moment,but you have to let it go.
But I'm really bad at that.It's much easier to say than to
actually do. I struggle with thefact of when I post, I make
a very very very large effort toturn off my phone and walk away for
at least an hour, Like Icannot sit there. It's so easy for

(13:18):
me to become obsessed with how's itdoing? How many likes does it have?
How many comments have I gotten?Are they positive? Are they negative?
Are they neutral? Does no reallycare? Like sometimes I just have
to like post, turn my phoneoff and go cook dinner. That's good
that you do that. Because somany times you post something and you think,
oh, this is going to behuge, people are going to give
me comments and stuff, and thenyou do that. I think when you

(13:41):
start refreshing and refreshing your page,you realize there's a little bit of a
problem with oh, like you're notposting it for you're not posting it for
Like it's kind of like our radioshow. Like podcasting has now made us
realize what people really do enjoy listeningto and don't enjoy listening to. Because
back in the day, you doa break and you wouldn't know what your

(14:01):
ratings were for six months or whateverit was, you know. I mean,
that's that's how fast the world ismoving right now, like at a
point where we don't understand the ramificationsof social media and what's being done to
us, like because it's just stillso new, Like we don't have the
test subjects to be able to understandwhat is what is happening to us.

(14:24):
Yeah, I worry about you knowa lot of people like kids, you
know what I mean. That's mynext question is so I live with my
niece and nephew and I'm looking atShannon and maybe you Mojo, I don't
know when like Joe started, butat what age do you let your kids
like join I'm going to hold outfor as long as I started in fifth

(14:46):
grade on my Space. Did youreally? Yeah? I mean in my
mom, my mom, we hada different situation, so she didn't care
what I did, right, SoI was like, yeah, I'll pick
my top five and all this stuff. And then it became like a social
Yeah. So luc is going intofifth grade and she has she has like
I would say sixty percent of herfriends have phones and social media, so

(15:07):
she's, you know, part ofthat forty percent that doesn't. And I
told her this is this will noteven be a conversation until you are well
into middle school. And her dadis on the same page there. But
it's still so crazy to me thatshe loves like looking at my Instagram,
looking at photos, looking at youknow, like whatever, looking at nail
pictures and makeup, you know.And she likes doing stories on my Instagram

(15:31):
story. So sometimes you'll see avideo of her and you can tell that
she did it because she posts allthese these gifts and whatever on there,
and she'll ask me, mom,she thinks that the viewser likes how many
likes did I get? And I'mlike, like that to me is I've
had to explain to her so manytimes, that's not why you're putting something
out there. You're putting it outthere because you want to share, or

(15:52):
you think it's funny or whatever.But the fact that already, at ten
years old, that's that that's whatthey're thinking about, is really gary,
really really scary and interesting because backwhen we were younger, the only version
of this that we knew was onValentine's Day when the kids would pass out
Valentine's to each other or you buythe suckers or the flowers or whatever on

(16:12):
Valentin's Day, which I always thoughtwas the worst titles. Still, kindigrams
is the worst idea that they dothat. Why do they do that?
Popularity condos? Yeah, I thinkfor my kids. For my kids having
boys like Joe is not the mostactive social media morning guy in the in
our company, he doesn't look atit that way. And actually Tom Polman's

(16:33):
talked to him a little bit aboutit, and he's just like, that's
just not me. I'd be fakingit if I did it. It got
active. So he had to actuallybring somebody into a show that was more
active. Luke is not even onsocial media, and Jacob literally if he
puts a post up there, Iget calls from eight thousand people. He's
alive, Like when he post hewas. He posts like once every three

(16:53):
months. He posts a bunch ofpictures of him and his boyfriend and people
were like, we didn't even knowhe was dating anybody. But to him,
he just doesn't give a shit aboutit. And I kind of like
that. Luke, especially Luke.Luke has UH. I don't even know
what his is. It's like actuallysome weird name or something. But Luke
will actually post a story and it'susually a sports story. It's like tom

(17:15):
Izzo or something like that, orthe Lakers just hired a new coach or
something. But I mean, goahead, no, no, you were
talking. It's cool, you cango No, no, no, I
don't. And who do we likemore? They should talk? You gotta
put she has more followers, hasmore followers now, I think, uh,

(17:36):
at some point in human nature,at some point we understood that,
or not understood it, but werealized and not that's a bad word too,
we thought that there was we've atsome point in human existence. We
thought that there was value in whatwas visible and in the caveman times,

(17:59):
if I had the lion's wool onmy back, oh, because I see
that that's visual of that is aman of value. And then it turned
into watches. And the Apple signon a laptop is better than the Dale
like so, and the people inthat big house must be so much happier.
Yeah, so, the like buttonand the views, this isn't something

(18:22):
new. This is just different painon the same car. It's embedded in
our like our human DNA. It'sbeen ingrained for thousands of years. I
also think most people don't realize thatwe have a different experience on social media
and than most people, because Ithink when I talk about this, people
like, oh, you're being whiny, Like, oh my god, it's
it's not that bad. And myperfect example of this is I love posting

(18:47):
to private stories to my close friendsand family, and the interactions that I
have on that form of social mediawhere it's like truly only the people that
I care about and interacting with themversus it being to the public can be
too drastically different. Sponsors to myday even if I posted the same content
so it's it is wild what peopleare capable of conveying on the Internet and

(19:10):
are comfortable sending to other human beings, Like there are lots of people.
Nobody on the show bitches about morethings than I do. I've never once
sent a comment, a DM anythingalong the lines of things that I recited
on a regular basis to somebody Itruly hated in the world. I don't
understand why this has become acceptable commonbehavior. Yeah, we do talk about

(19:37):
it though on the radio sometimes wedo talk about what we hate. I
guess that could be a form ofsocial media. It used to be that
that was the case, Like you'dgive your opinion on something on the air,
and it was like a social mediapost. It's not. But it's
the derogatory remarks on posts versus sayingI had a bad experience somewhere or I
don't like something, Like I'm tryingto think of the person that I don't

(19:59):
like the most, the person thatjoke about. It's not the case,
but the person that we joke aboutall the time. Taylor Swift, I
would never go on to her paand write the things that have been written
to me to her, like it'swild. I think, well, I
think that we would never do itto a person that is not a like
they think that you're a public figureenough that they do that, and and

(20:21):
it's a shame because you are aperson just like you know, public figures
are you know, are people too. My mom one time said something.
I came home and uh, andone of my neighbors he got really mad
at us. And it was anolder man and he uh, he yelled
at me and my friends and I'llnever forget this, and he said,
you guys are such a disappointment.And I came home and I was so

(20:44):
upset that he said this to me. And my mom said said to me,
she goes, if I called youa disappointment, that should hurt because
I know who you are, buthe doesn't know who you are. And
I thought that to myself, likethat is the most interesting thing. Like
if you're you know, the peoplethat you know and love, you know,
were to write something on your socialmedia, which probably could be the

(21:04):
case, right, and write somethingnegative to you, that would really hurt.
But if somebody that you don't reallyeven like spend time with or hang
out with write something like I'm notgoing to let them ruin my fucking day.
You're You're right, that's the rightway to view it. That's what
I'm working on getting towards my rebuttalto that therapy, because that's brought up

(21:26):
very often, is I understand yourcorrect My family doesn't tell me every day,
and they are my biggest champions.You're beautiful. I love you.
You're the funniest person I know.I care about you. I think you're
a good person. But every dayI hear the complete opposite of that.
So while you're right and those shouldn'tmatter, I do think it's consistency and

(21:47):
voicing of those opinions where it's like, cool, there can be a post
for somebody who says you're pretty,But every day I receive a DM going
you're the worst person in the world. You don't deserve to have a job,
and you don't deserve to be here. You truly get those every day.
Do you want me to read?Like? I have a file of
the comments that I can, sowhy don't you block these people? I
do? But like here, uh, how many tuns do you have?

(22:11):
Bitch? You have a horrible voice. I don't know who the fuck let
you do radio? But it's notas bad as your waistline. Let's see
how you get thicker. Have youever thought of sharing these people, like
putting all these things and sharing themso that people can see everybody can see
who it is? It does?I mean sometimes I think it also invites

(22:33):
it in sometimes more. But butyou know, like that's I get that
regularly. It's fucked up. Sotwo things come to my mind. And
obviously, like I don't expect likewhat I say, because you know,
everybody has different experiences, everybody hasdifferent upbringings, our biology is different,
how we receive information and all thatstuff is different. So it works for

(22:56):
me may not work for you.One of the things that I've like tried
to instill in Joe Saiah and whenI hear you kind of speaking about is
quality over quantity. Like hopefully I'minstilling enough positive things in him so that
the foundation that even all of thisbullshit will stand on can only go so
as far as like what I've putinside him. And another thing is that

(23:19):
I try to tell Joe science it'snot what people call you, is what
you answer to. So I tryto tell Joe Saiah, like if somebody
call you out, your name,like, it's only power when you respond.
It's only power when you give itpower. Like if I say,
Megan, you a fat ass bitch, but you don't believe that, then
that hopefully that shit bounced off ofyou, like you know what I mean,
like water on dockers. Yes,if that makes sense. No,

(23:42):
it does, and you're right.It doesn't mean it doesn't hurt though,
No, for sure. And Ithink a lot of what it was was
consistency. I think my problem isI was introduced to the world on a
very public platform at eighteen, andit hasn't stopped. And so like my
entire adult life has just been constantcriticism room strangers on a literal daily basis.

(24:07):
And I would say that I receivea lot of and I know why
this happens, which is almost themore frustrating part, because I'm also very
much praised for this behavior. ButI know I get more backlash than a
normal person because I'm a very opinionatedperson, which is fine, I'm not
ashamed of it. I have verystrong opinions, and people either really agree
with me and they love me,or people really disagree with me and they

(24:30):
hate me, which is great,But like I'm praised by my employers being
like, you are very defined asa person, and you're very what like,
people relate to you, and that'sgreat. But that relatability also has
the cultures opposite. And it's thepeople who love me and say, oh
my god, I'm so glad you'resaying that, are also the people that
are like you don't deserve to beable to say that. I wonder,

(24:55):
though, how many times people hearthough, because you do talk about people
attacking youcial media, and I wonderhow many times that draws people out to
attack more too. I also sometimesI don't think until I read them to
people, and like you guys said, please don't read anymore. But like
I do think people think I'm beinga sensitive little baby until you read them,
and then you're like, oh shit, yeah yeah, Well I think

(25:22):
I'm uh are you gonna get backon social media? I think I'm gonna
delete it all? Uh No,I don't know what is your social media
again? So I can send youuh some d ms. Uh it's Zach
Martian like the Alien music, ZachMartian music. How do you? I
always wonder how people come up withcertain things like that, Oh did you
were you asking me, Yeah,how do you come up with? What?

(25:45):
Tell me Zach Martian music? Yeah? I make music. So that's
the last part. My first nameis Zach, so that's the beginning.
My middle name is actually Martin,and I there's if you google Zach Martin,
there's a football player. There's likethree other physicians. Your last name
is not Martin, No, itis Martin. Oh, I think you

(26:06):
said your middle name. No.No, okay, So because I was
gonna say, I've written you checksbefore for Zach Martin, how does it
I cash them? No, Soinstead of having my real last name Martin,
it's Martian because aliens are fucking sweet. I don't know, it's just
like that was fantastic exactly. Thatwas. That was a great a great

(26:26):
topics. Hey, thanks guys forlike doing this with me. This was
actually very therapeutic and I was notexpecting this. So what I would love
to know and maybe you don't wantto share them because they'll be the next
rotation. But what was the otherop things that you were thinking about doing
as a topic. So I wasgonna do like uh impost game where there's

(26:48):
one imposter and we all have thesame words besides one person, so we
all give one explanation. So let'ssay it's Mickey Mouse. I would say
iconic, keV would say big years, whatever, and there's gonna be one
person that says Tiger, and we'reall gonna be like, what the fuck.
This guy is obviously the impostor,and then they're gonna try to like
explain how they're not the impostor,and yeah, it's a really fun game.

(27:14):
I'm so glad you didn't choose