TD&L Donkey Show Podcast for Monday - The Roast of Tom Brady

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Episode Transcript

(00:04):
Let me know when you're ready.I bet that's a good start. This
is Tanner, Drew and Laura's DonkeyShow, Donkey Show. Yeah. Oh
I'm stretching right now. That's theget right there. It feels good.
Oh I felt glorious. That's that'speak right there. Take a nap right

(00:28):
now. Why do stretches feel sogood? Why is that? Is it
because they're so pent up and stressyall the time that when you actually do
release it, it's like kind oflike a little endorphin rush. Yeah.
I guess my eyes water felt sogood. Hi, it's I'm all relaxed,
Heller exactly. It's like someone's beenchopping that back all day. Donkey
Show podcast. Thanks for checking usout on the dot com, the iHeartRadio

(00:51):
app, or wherever you listen topodcasts. Yeah, yea ye, gangs
all here. Beef is supposed tojoin us, join us in a few
minutes. He was wrapping up ameeting with Susan. I think they maybe
talking bacon and beer. Nice.That's going to be announced soon. Yeah,
we're going to be announcing that onI think the third of June.
Nice, Oh my gosh, whichI think June I'm like, oh,

(01:11):
that's so far away, but it'snot less than a month. Yeah,
it'll be here before you know it, too, especially you're going to be
off. Like do you leave Sundayfor Iceland? I leave Sunday, Yeah,
which is kind of a weird dayto leave, I feel like,
but it works out. I can. I can kind of have a normal
weekend and then just bail before thework week starts. It's almost better too,

(01:33):
because we are going to get thenicest days of the year, and
that's kind of protocol, at leastfor me when I when I try and
go somewhere else, it's nice athome, right, you know, And
so at least you'll get to dipthe doughnut a day or two, especially
when I'm going into weather that isvery similar to what we're getting right now
here. Yeah, so months mightfly by for you since you've got so
many things planned. Yeah, I'mtaking next week off as well, but

(01:56):
I'm not going anywhere. A staycationis nice though. That's just as relaxing,
if not more relaxing, because there'sa lot of stuff I want to
finish. There's something a couple ofbooks I want to get to. Yeah,
it's project a clock. You know. Once this rain finally lets up
to there's a lot of things youjust can't do until you have a little
bit of that weather freedom. Yeah, i might go to the coast,

(02:16):
That's about it, but I'll bein town for the most part. I'm
doing a few days at the coast. But my kids are like in state
testing so hard. They're still Ohthey do it and they go hard.
Now. So like the night before, they send you like a full email.
Make sure your kid is fed,charge that wow, charge their laptop,

(02:37):
do all these different things. Makesure that they have a well rounded
meal with them. Because when wewere kids, you just got sent in
there and half the kids were malnourishedand tired, and I just fill out
the scantron with like cool pictures exactly. So I'm hoping my kids come back
and have a decent grade. Whatabout you, beef, You're going to
do anything exciting next week? Uh, like as in the weekend, this

(02:57):
coming up week there just anything.Yeah, we're gonna be off. So
we got the week you would haveto put up with us. I'm working
man, Casey's going to be inhere with his feet up being here.
Do you feel that would we're noton for a week. Is is it
better? Is it worse? Oh, it's definitely worse. Uh okay,
it ruins my like the rhythm.It throws me off. It's like I
thought maybe he'd get a break,like no costumes this week. Yeah exactly.

(03:22):
Don't get me wrong. You stillfind a way to get on my
nerves, but you'll do it froma distance. Yeah, it's a little
easier to swallow when you're not here. No, I like, I'm very
much like a rhythm guy. LikeI have my way. I come in
here, I drink some coffee withyou guys for the first part of my
morning, and then I go uhinto a living hell for the rest of

(03:42):
my day. Yeah. Like,I won't even be able to like I'm
be here for the first few daysof the week next week, and I'll
still have to go through the fullroutine before I get here in order to
not feel weird, Like it's gottaeven without these guys, I have to
pretend they're here until I get here. In my mind, I'm a creature
of having to be if I dothe same things all the time again,
but now I'm starting to do differentstuff, like like Friday Sausa dancing,

(04:05):
and then Friday I went to ahigh intensity interval training class. Yeah,
I hit HIT and I still feelit, Like every step I take,
every every time I sit down withthe toilet, everything hurts. Those are
no joke. I mean people wholived or do work out every day.
If they don't do HIT, andthey do it, they're feeling, they're
feeling. I'm gonna start doing itevery every Friday. I guess I like

(04:25):
it better because it is a goodkind of pain. And it's also thirty
minutes instead of the hour that mynormal classes. AWA. Yeah, it's
quick and you they tell you whatyou're doing ahead of time, but just
tell me to do and I getit over with and you're done. Yeah,
cotton, and it still kicks yourass. I was so fucked up
Friday night and Saturday, just sosore, like even getting up, you
know, because the second day isthe worst day. So someday I was
getting about of bed and like,yeah, your hams strings going, everything

(04:47):
hurts. Don't get the thing whereyou try and sit on the toilet and
it's like yes, yes, everytime I sit down, it's a screw
shy, a little free fall thatlast couple of inches. Yeah, that
lets you know that you've been doingsomething and that's a positive. Hurt's so
good. It's good. I'm goingto keep it up. It's but boy,
there's only one person was getting inmy eyes, and that I mean
that means you're getting it. Youcould go. You can go headband for

(05:10):
sure. Please put on a sweatHell. Yeah, there's only one person
not doing the hit classes around yourcase. It's you. Where you feeling
some phone? Look, no,I can't do it for religious reasons.
I get it. That makes sense. You doing gassers out here in the
parking lots like, Yeah, no, dude, we can't do anything with
hitting. I sent beef Water textmessage Friday and I just to check in
on him, see how he's doing. And I just asked him because he

(05:34):
told me that his son wanted likepizza that day and he said, like
Parker wanted pizza, and so Igo, did you get let me read
it because he got very defensive veryquickly. Well, I knew where it
was going. I wasn't though.I wasn't even thinking about it until you
said that on a free frive Friday. You guys are going pizza. Yeah.
He hit me up on the drivehome and he's like, hey,
Dad, do you think you couldpick me up some Wendy's. And I'm
like, well, sure, whatever, because he Friday is in his mind,

(05:58):
Friday is that we're going out,We're getting something. It's yeah,
we're not eating it home on Friday. So I said, I said,
uh, let's see, it's beena long conversation. It wasn't that I'm
scrolling up a lot of TI,a lot of talk, a lot of
tic. I feel like I feellike it was about a four back and
forth okay exchange. It wasn't verymuch. I was scrolling. I said,

(06:23):
uh, just got to get backto past the dick. What did
you guys and what did you guyshave for dinner? Did you get him?
Did you get him pizza? Andshe says, I'm all. He
goes, uh, I'm good,we got Wendy's. So yes, I
had more fast food. I knowwhere this is going. And I wasn't
even thinking that. I said Igot pizza on Friday night, because uh,

(06:45):
you know, you said that Parkerwanted pizza, and he goes,
so you did have fast food twicein that one day. But that's what
I wasn't asked. I wasn't askingthat. I wasn't asking that. That
just confirmed it on your own.He switched it up. Surprised me though.
I thought for sure it was goingto be a pizza night, and
he said, you know what Iwant that junior baker cheek. Yeah it's
good man. I love Wendy's.They're spicy nugs, they're baking cheese all.
Yes, true, I have aspicy chicken sandwich. Yeah, that's
what I like. It's so good, so good. So yeah. Because

(07:10):
they put the spice on the breading, it's important. I hate when people
do that. I mean, Ilike it when they do both. I
don't mind both. But you gotto make the breading spicy. That's not
a spicy chicken sandwich. It's justjust spicy sauce on. Because Wendy's does
it so good with that spice onthere that it has enough kick all in
the patty. I feel like,uh, the mcchickens that way right,

(07:32):
the bread it's in the breading.If spic spicy, spicy m chicken.
Yeah, that's why I think theyneed a full sizeer of that. Just
make go big nugget. Like wetalked before, the Crispy needs a little
overhaul. They need to send thatback to R and D pull it,
pose it, start it over,bring back the double big Mac until you
figure yourself out and then come back. I agree with Drew. Give me

(07:53):
the jumbo nug and let's get onwith life. Sounds pretty great. It's
to be a sweet, big assdisc of a nugget. Uh look at
that. Looking at all the talkor sorry, the text messages on the
lazy B text line. A lotof people wanted my head on a spike
today. Yeah, a lot ofpeople thought that I was a Kyle or
a Karen type character. Look,people get very testy when it comes to

(08:16):
like challenging parenthood or how they're raisingtheir kids. Clearly so, by the
way, I wasn't even the onewho brought this up, but Laura saw
this on Saturday. Yeah, yeah, I just saw a dad helping his
son pee on a tree in abusy fred Meyer parking lot. And my
whole thing was like, I didn'tgo straight to judgment. I mean,
in my mind, I was like, oh, that's not something you see

(08:39):
every day, but I was thinkingabout it. I'm like is this something
parents do a lot, Like Iwas just trying to figure out, like
there's a bathroom and like right insidethe doors, like why are we doing
this? Is that appropriate? Isit animal? Just kind of one Like
I was more curious of like isthis acceptable behavior? And I didn't think
about the fact that, like,oh, potty training in when it's time

(09:00):
to go, it's time to go, because I remember when I was a
kid being in that situation, likeon a road trip or something, and
I'm like I cannot hold it,Like I cannot, you know, and
in those situations and you know,you just take whatever is available. But
I so I didn't know. Sothat's why I was. I was genuinely
threw it out there. And asthe parents in the room drew in casey,
they're like, you know, ithappens. Kids got to go when

(09:22):
they got to go, and thenon parents are especially me, I was
just like, you know, becausein radio, you got to take a
stance we can't all agree about thethings, we can't all agree in here
that yeah, you know what,that's that's fine. Let's move on because
really, truthfully, I don't givea fuck, you know what I mean,
Like it don't you know I don'thave a kid. I'm not gonna
get upset by it. It's justa conversation. You weren't You weren't pulling

(09:43):
your phone out at Freddy's. Butyeah, behind the scenes, I just
I took the opposite approach, whichis, no, take your dirty kid
inside and let him pee in there. Yeah. And if you're like,
well, you just got to peenhis pants, well then maybe you should
write extra change of clothes, Maybeyou should have planned it, put him
in a pull up or something.Right, So I'm just, you know,
doing my angle, and that justthe floodgates opened up. People.
They got hot. One guy waslike, pretty much wanted to beat me

(10:05):
up here. Let me see ifI can find that just a kid on
the side of the world. Seventiesbully here. As far as the child
peeing on the tree, not abig deal, not even the deal.
The biggest deal is how big ofa careen you are for even bringing it
up. Laura brought it up.You're out of touch. I think he
was definitely talking to me. He'slike, why would you even bring that
up? Well, because I wascurious. We're not parents, we don't

(10:26):
know Bendy's bully from a guy whoused to punch people in the spine.
Even seventies, bullies were like hard, they were really hard. Dick out
wherever I want you to break yourfinger. It's just a funny prank,
bitch running bing bang. So asfar as the dad letting his son pee

(10:48):
right there on the side of thesidewalk, I I believe it's an act
of nature to pee. Ya.This guy is blah blah bla. He
sounds like outside it right then.Yeah, here's the guy who was pretty
upset. Yeah, you sound likea little bit right now. You can

(11:09):
totally tell you don't have kids.Just shut up. Try saying that to
a dad on the side of theroad that's helping his kid go bathroom.
He's gonna knock you out. AndI bet you I would not ever say
anything to anybody about that stuff.I'm not a Karen type person. I
let people do what they want todo. I don't complain, even if
it's something that I don't like.I usually don't say shit, Yeah,

(11:33):
I think you go the uh youcan't park here, raut you just drow
your window down. You can't,He's me, what are you doing What
are you doing? Now? Thereare times all the time where I see
things that I don't like and Idon't think they should do it. But
I've never been like, I'm gonnago talk to the manager, I'm gonna
call somebody, I'm gonna you know, the only time I ever have done
anything like that, I had someneighbors that were really rude and would just
like let music blast at midnight andthen they would I didn't call for that.

(11:58):
I called because they parked in thedead sine her the cul de Sac,
Like it's a fucking parking lot.Well that's not okay, it's pretty
And I called the non emergency linesand he can you just tell them to
move because I can't get my fuckingcar out. They're parked in the middle,
Like two or three cars were parkedin the middle because they had a
party or something. There was nopark. Yeah, parked this dead center
of the cul de Sac. Iwould guess that most of the parents who
are super upset about it, eventhen it wouldn't it's not ideal to ever

(12:22):
pee in the parking lot, Butyou know, it's just situational sometimes where
you're like, god damn it,like if I got up in the morning
and I'm like, hey, I'mgonna take the girls to Freddy's and Josie's
gonna almost pee her pants and I'mgoing to have her do it right next
to the can return worst idea ever. But if if, if it's just
me her and a and a canmachine, here we go. I totally

(12:43):
getting on the air, though,get your dirty kids inside. I was
incredibly offended by your position. Yeah, Casey gets calling under disguise in the
back. Yeah, no, it'sset half those talkback messages. I also
get what you got it. Yougotta do what you got to do.
You know. I remember being akid and holding it and then just going
you know what I mean, andI'd go, I'd go wherever, and

(13:05):
I'd go on myself. We've allbeen on the side of the road,
pier like I think we've all beenthere. And also when I when I
took the stance, I didn't realizethe kid was three. Yeah, it's
a different thing nine, which Ijust missed that part. I just I
just missed, Like, uh,I'm sorry. I you know, it's
like, if it's a nine yearold, you should probably take care of

(13:26):
there's obviously an age cap Yeah.Yeah, where like you can't be doing
that forever because that's like what kindof parenting is that, you know,
like I'll just go wherever. Yeah, that's some respect for everyone around you.
Yeah, and when when when weget to those moments where it's like
I'm gonna puke or I'm about tobe my pants, even like a season
parent, which I'm not the mostseasoned parent. I've only been a parent
for nine years, but I turnedinto a rookie almost immediately, like like,

(13:50):
oh my god, my god,oh my god, you're in the
new for Runner. Ah, LikeI just would I wig like you and
not. You don't make great decisionswhen you're with again, but you're just
trying to get it out of yournew car at whatever. At least the
guy, at least the dad gotout of the car and stopped, you
know what I mean, he couldhave just rolled the window down and stuck
the kid out let it, youknow, yeah, like blanket like Michael

(14:13):
Jackson over a balcony. It's theonly thing I can think of is that
it was like an emergency situation.I don't know why you wouldn't just continue
on into the store. That wasmy initial thoughts there in front of everyone.
Weird, we're about to lose it. Yeah, because you said you
as You'll ask you kid half adozen times and they'll say no until it's
too late. They're so stubborn,you know, Like I just stopped doing

(14:33):
that, and I'm forty two,so it's just wild. They're like,
you're you're peeing on yourself. Idon't have to go. This is a
job interview, and in fact,it's not good for you, Tanna.
That's probably why you peace so much, is because at some point in your
childhood you held it into that.I treat it like a game. I
hold it till it hurts every time. I love. That explains a lot
about you. Beef water. It'sI only really drink on Fridays and Saturdays.

(14:56):
And dude, I drank not verymuch Friday, but had like three
beers Friday. But Saturday I thinkI had like I don't know, five
maybe, and I was getting up. I must have got up five times,
oh yeah, like every single hour. I get so frustrated. Dude.
I got up one point I saidsomebody was there and I went fuck

(15:16):
fuck. You know, like,but I try to keep it out of
my breath because I was just sofrustrated from waking up. Because what happens
is is you feel it and thenyou get those you know when you hold
it for so long you can feelit and like your kidneys. Uh yeah,
that's where I feel it. Yeah, that's aggressive, and I just
it's anytime I drink, man,I just drink that. It happens to
me more now than that old Iused to never get up in the night.

(15:37):
Yeah, never once or never.It would be virtually never, and
then I would say, like lastyear, maybe once here and there,
but like last night, I feellike I got up maybe twice. Yeah,
I've always gotten up to pee,but it's like on the average,
when I drink four times, it'snuts. I'd do about once every night

(15:58):
at some point around like midnight,one am somewhere. I just think I
need a new chip clip. Yeah, that's possible. That's possible. I
wouldn't be surprised if you do clampthat bad boy before bed. Just tie
it off like a little babies andbellicle cord. Just clip that sucker ride.
I saw this on TikTok. Thisis pretty funny. This mom is
doing cover songs using baby instruments.And she did a cover of System of

(16:21):
a Down's chop Seay using like kidstoys get the xylophone. It's just like
little rainbow one. Yeah, yeah, give the little shake up. Then
I play my checup the table andam gonna I'm gonna. Is she changing

(16:42):
the lyrics? Yeah, just playingwith my plato jumping the mud chase,
but flies pretty good singer, fishcrackers, some line, She's good,

(17:02):
stack my block's way up high,cry damn when money says it, nap
time. Oh my, she's good. She is good. She did a
lot of rock songs. She didkilling in the name by rage. Let's
never gets you through the day,right, you know, spilling from a
sippy cup. Oh. McDonald farmshorses the Taller's rage like rude Boss.

(17:29):
McDonald farm horses taller's rage like rudehorses. Wow, I've never heard anyone
play that little piano like that.Kick screams a man in. I'm bite
under egg, got to climb upthe table. I'm a rip up stipers.
The taller the fire and the youtry the passified, I'll top in

(17:52):
my pants, leaving you and stripein the food track the passify I'll top
in my pants leaving you right.Heck NOA won't do what you tell me.
Heck NOA won't do what you tellme. Heck NOA won't do what
you tell me. Heck NOA won'tdo what you tell me. She's awesome,
Yea, she is great. Soundslike a pretty good musician too,

(18:15):
because if you can do that withbaby instruments, you can do with real
instruments. A pretty basic instrument doingthat and she's singing and doing all that
at the same time. That's prettygreat. So have those videos online at
one five nine com. She's probablybored out of her mind, right,
And I'm glad the internet exists forher because that talent would have died on
the vine in the eighties. Nobodywould have ever heard any of Yeah.

(18:37):
The neighbors have been like, whatare you doing? Like you're kind of
freaking out. Yeah, So thelyrics would have been weird back then.
Uh. This also in viral overthe weekend. It's a metal cover of
Sweet Home, Alabama. Wheels tellhim those guys voices? Is that Leo

(19:00):
whatever? Frog Leap Studios I thinkis the name of it. Every once
so I'll have a good one.But his voice is I feel like sweet
Home Alabama. You can't uncountry.Like you try to try to turn it
into a metal song, you can't. It still can't. Okay, there

(19:26):
you go. Young sisters performed someheavy metal, heavy metal covers. They're
nine and eleven years old. NiceAlexa or Alex Alex. It's a sorry,
there's no L in it. AI X A A A I X
say is how you say? Ithought that was a She's a symbol a
I x A. Anyway, It'skind of like the prince changed his name.

(19:48):
She's nine and the eleven year oldis named Nirvana. But they showcase
their metal covers on TikTok, includingMetallica, Ozzie and Iron Made. Yeah,
nine or eleven? That sounds three? Do you ever think like some

(20:12):
of these sounds like the phone ofthat one? I had a little bit
everything, Like some of these kidswho are seeing go viral now for being
such great musicians that we're going tosee them again in twenty years when they're
blown up. Do you ever wonderthat, I mean especially, I mean
obviously these parents had an agenda fortheir children. You're not going to be
listening to Taylor Swift. I namedyou Nirvana furreason, you know what I

(20:32):
mean? Like this, these kidsprobably had instruments in their hands since they
popped out the womb. Nine andeleven is amazing. My kid is going
to be nine this summer and no, none of that stuff has happened.

(20:52):
Wow, it's pretty good. Prettygood. Yeah, pretty good for anyone.
Yeah, I couldn't do that.Parents are probably musicians as well.
Yeah, those kids probably had instrumentsin their hands at a very very early
age. Watching this video of alittle boy, he's probably eight or something,

(21:15):
seven or eight, and he justwhales on the drums, and I'm
assuming, and he also looks good, like his posture is perfect, and
I go, he's copying his dad. Yeah, his dad probably sat right
next to him drumming. But thesekids are so good that they even performed
Master of Puppets. This is ahard song, A little sloppy there,

(21:53):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, casehe's like, all right, I'm not
bedtime. Pretty good. I wonderwho's who, Like, is the nine

(22:17):
year old the drummer? Or iseleven year old the drummer? Good question.
I don't guarantee they have a neighborgoing christ. Yeah, that's pretty
impressive. I'm jealous. I wish. But in regard to your question,
a couple of minutes ago, Ithink that about the girl the Foo Fighters
drummer girl. Yeah, that's hername. I don't recall, but I

(22:37):
feel like playing shows, so Ikeep thinking the same thing, like she's
gonna be a dump thing, aband or something in the future. I
would think the same thing. Yeah, unless she gets enough YouTube hits her
platform, I don't know how itwould get any bigger, or the girl
like the What's in your butthole?Like what a she became an actress and

(23:00):
then like the Tonight Show in twentyfifty they play that check out his buttole
this one viral when you were notGod, damn, I was just boring
one day. I've always wondered thatwhen I see kids get viral, like,
I wonder if they because eventually it'sgonna happen, right, Kid's gonna
get famous and they're like, butyeah, I mean yeah, you could
get famous for your music and gooff and do that, or you know,

(23:21):
it's like, well, I wantedto be a fucking astronauts, I'm
gonna do that. Instead, youknow what I mean that sweet day.
I feel like there's a lot oftalented people who don't make a living doing
what they're good at, you knowwhat I mean? Yeah, she goes
to space. I'd be pretty dopetoo though, space. Yeah yeah,
or play Grateful Dead Space, whichis all drumming in space. Brah,

(23:42):
mind blowing. Let's see. Uhthat Tom Brady roast was over the weekend.
This was just bonkers. The clipsthat I've seen. I haven't seen
the whole thing because it's like threehours or something long. I think it's
worth it, full on popcorn ride, you know, I think so.
I've probably seen a half hour's worthof clips, but not the whole thing.
But the clips that I have seenfrom Nicky Glazier, from Kevin Hart,

(24:04):
from uh Hinchcliffe, Everyone's been justfucking stuff. Even Jeffrey Ross was
fired. He's always the king.Was that on Netflix or Comedy Central?
Netflixix? Netflix? Was it theirfirst live event? No, it was
the first live roast for sure.But I'm glad they did it like that
because there was no editing. Therewasn't like uh, you know. He

(24:26):
also did one uh Cat Williams ComedySpecial live over the weekend as well.
They said that that was one ofthe first live I'm sure it's all a
new thing, because what's the lastthing they have to do to conquer the
giants, and that is have liveentertainment. Well, they've done, didn't
they do? Sports? Haven't theydone? They've done some light sports.
But that's the next thing is they'retrying to turn into that realm. Yeah.

(24:48):
Yeah, we'll see what happens withthat Mike Tyson fight. That's that's
going to be a huge draw.Mike looks like and we'll see how like,
how does Netflix handle the like floodgateof everybody going to one thing at
the same Can their servers handle ita little? I guess we'll find out
when that happens, right, Ibet I bet you they can handle it.
I bet you they're prepared. Ibet they've got some big thing on

(25:11):
a cold river full of computers justcooking. Yeah, I'm sure, But
when is that fight? That's July. We have a long time still.
They got to hype out slap eachother in the ear at a press conference.
Someone said it at the roast lastnight, though, they go,
dude, Tyson's going to kill thatkid and I think so, I think
my Tyson's not like I agree withFIFA, Like, I think he's got

(25:32):
a record to keep and he's notgoing to go out at fifty seven.
This would be sweet if he,as a loser, is a kidney and
he spits up a little blood,takes a knee, and it's game over.
Yeah, that's what I would loveto see. A nice body shot
just crippler. Quit's right there,because there's nothing you can do about it.
Like once you once you take thoseshots to the liver or whatever,
your body just shuts down. Idon't care how tough you are, Like,

(25:52):
your body just goes, Okay,we're done. What's Jake Palvin saying?
Has he been trash talking or what'she feel like? Not so much
like a little bit upfront, butI think that with every passing training video
that comes out, he probably goes, yeah, so I got to do
this thing. Well. I bethe's set for life too. He was
already super rich, but I bethe's set for life after this fight.

(26:14):
And he even he has to respectthe greatest, how much just Mike Tyson
worth just for shits and giggles realquick. He's definitely been on quite the
resurgence over the last he is fiveto ten years. Because he was out
it was really really what I feellike, what did it was the hangover.
Once the hangover came out, hereally started to get his business.
His business ventures have really like he'sgot it that whole Tyson Farms or Tyson

(26:37):
Ranch or whatever that is. He'sgot a successful podcast. If you haven't
changed, Tyson branded stuff is nowhis you know, hot box. His
net worth is give me a littleguess, twenty seven million, thirty seven
how much thirty five? How muchlower? I'm gonna say sixty eight million
dollars. Damn guys, his networth. I'm getting conflicting reports here because

(27:00):
you know, when you type thestuff, because he had a lot of
creditor it says he's worth anywhere betweenfour hundred and thirty to seven hundred million
dollars. Okay, well, Imean you think about he is a brand
in himself. You say Tyson andthe word boxing, you don't have to
see. Oh, I take thisback, I'll say Iron, Mike,
you know who that is. Lookslike it's now worth his three hundred million
dollars. But it looks like he'searned four hundred and thirty million in his

(27:22):
per person purses and endorsements, whichwould be roughly seven hundred million dollars today
after adjustments. Well, he spenta lot of it and lost a lot
of it. Yeah, nobody toldhim how to spend money. So he
bought a tiger. That's not evena joke. But they say he's about
three hundred million dollars. That's alot of cash. I have a tiger,
pretty pretty good, Yeah, finda tiger. Well, when he
ran out of money and he hadand he ran like ran out of freedom,

(27:45):
I think at one point they hadto like find a home for his
tiger because he can just send thatto a cul de sac. Yeah,
all right, So yeah, theroast of Tom Brady was last night,
and it was pretty brutal. Youwant to hear some nicky glazier, sure,
yeah, I miss that part alot of these clips I you're hearing
from TikTok, so you might hearlike people laughing in the background and stuff.

(28:06):
And I love you. No oneworks harder than this man. Do
you know that every morning Kevin wakesup at four am to make a shitty
movie. That was kind of likea theme all night, like Kevin,
We'll say yes, it says prettymuch yesterday whatever. True. I love
your movies or as I call them, short films. Oh please give it
up for zero time super Bowl championRandy Moss. Why don't you have a

(28:30):
ring? What the hell? Man, You're one of the best ever.
Drew Bledsoe has a ring eron.Hernandez had a ring around his neck,
Like, Oh my god. Lotsof Aaron Hernandez jokes last night, and
you could tell because there's some ofthe football players who were probably friends with
him were in the background and youcould see they weren't liking it. Well,
some of these guys are not likingthe jokes because they don't want to

(28:51):
be associated to him, and itprobably is a you know, sore subject
for them, like like some ofthem are probably like really cared for them
for him, right, like theyprobably so much. I don't think he
was very well liked, and well, I know some people. I know
some people don't feel like he wasone of those very polarizing he would grab
your nuts. I know he wasweird, but I'm sure that he had
a handful of guys. Somebody mighthave liked the nut, kind of cared

(29:15):
about him. Yeah, either way, like just to know that there was
a murder on your team, andthen like people are making jokes about it,
like, yeah, where's the lineright this fucking guy holding the camera?
Tom Brady, five time Super BowlMVP, most career wins, most
career touchdowns, you have seven rings, well eight now that Giselle gave her
back. But Tom Brady's perfect smile. You can't tell if he's hurt or

(29:41):
not. It never goes away.Dumber then you saying yes to this roast
was when you said, hey,babe, you should try jiu jitsu.
I think that she was on fire. I was hearing many people say that
she was the best of the night. Nikki Glazier. It's definitely the best
I saw out of that first hour. Oh there at one moment the DJ

(30:03):
at Tom Brady's roast played the KendrickLamar Drake distract. Anybody's been following that
that happened. Yeah, there's alot of drama between the two of them.
It's funny to play it there though. Yeah, I was trying to
figure out the association. Yeah,I don't think there. Maybe some of
them was in the crowd. Oneof them was I don't know, yeah,
it could have been a drakester.But Tony Hinchcliff, he's the guy

(30:26):
from Kill Tony. He's super funny. I don't know if you've been watching
Kill Tony the podcast. I don'twatch every episode, but I see clips,
and god, it's really good.It seems really cutthroat because they just
pluck people from the crowd. Theyhave sixty seconds to do some stand up
yeah, and they'll tell you no, that was shit or that was really
good, and that can be It'sreally brutal. So that whole show is
a roast, you know, soyou think about it. He's made for

(30:48):
this. Yeah, so he wentup and just destroyed a tom This is
great. Actually, there's the wardenhere. Uh. I don't know if
I should air this one. He'sgreat, he says, yeah, I
love it. This is a fuckingstellar dais we have up here? Randy

(31:11):
Moss I was upset that Bill Belichicksaid he wouldn't give you a ring.
You know what else doesn't have aring? Bill Belichick's phone. I didn't
understand that one because he's he's outof work. Nobody's calling. He's up
here talking about what a big winnerTom is. But let me tell you,
Tom is afraid of the giants,which is why Kevin Hart is hosting

(31:34):
tonight. It's true. All nighthe's been using the school that Aaron Hernandez
kicked out from under himself, Savage. It's true. Kevin is so smart
that this is the one where youcan see the guys in the back and
they're just like no ancestors picked cotton. They called it deadlift game. So

(32:04):
Gronk sitting next to Kevin Heart,and Gronk is just blowing away what he's
hearing. You can't hear. Hecan't even believe the greatest expressions. But
Gronks pretty funny too. Yeah Idid. I didn't hear Gronks at all.
Did he go up there? Ihaven't gotten to that, I hope.
So, Gronk, I'm happy youcould take a break from writing Santa

(32:25):
letters to be here tonight. Iknew you were here when we were all
out of chocolate milk backstage. Bythe way, Gronk, that's Kevin Hart
sitting next to you. That's notyour shadow, Gronk, you look like
the Nazi. It kept burning himselfon the Ovens. You look like the

(32:50):
final boss in George Floyd the videogame. What the Great Jeff Ross Ladies
and Gentlemen, Jeff is so theonly one. I'm actually I'm actually kind
of blown away that Netflix said,yeah, let's just do it live.
Yeah, that there was no partYeah, I mean, because they're saying
what I mean, I'm guessing thatlike, hey, please are going to
be live. Don't say anything that'sgoing to like go hard something ridiculous.

(33:13):
But at the same time, I'mstill really surprised. I love that they
did that though. I love thatNetflix is really kind of like grasping comedy
and defending it and not like pullingback when people complain and getting rid of
something. If people complain, Iseem to stand it. And they probably
were using this a little bit aslike a measuring stick of like, Okay,
what can we get away with?What should we try to like real
in voyage kind of Yeah, Ithink we're probably gonna get more of these,

(33:37):
right, But don't you feel likewith the roast that like the tone
is set, you know what itis. There's nobody surprised about what happens.
You go in there and you getdrugged through the you know you're going
to be offended too, like right, as someone who if you're easily offended,
maybe that's not for you. It'snot a head pat Kim Kardashian showed
up to the Tom Brady Roast lastnight and she got she looks great by

(34:04):
the way she's up on stage.She's got a champagne glass in her hand,
and she's trying to get through herspeech. Hi by why whoa so?
I mean the booze went on fora while there and you could tell
somebody people some people try to stopit, but they eased up eventually and
she was able to get through herYou have to. It's like she's up
there, like, let her doher thing. But it's it's one of
those deals. It's like nickelback backin the day. It's trendy to hate

(34:27):
a Kardashian, right, It's like, I mean, at this point,
it's like booer because she's famous forno reason, but also like what else
you got, like just leuttered lettered. She seems like she's like obviously it
probably bothered a little bit, butshe seems like I'm used to this.
Well, I've got a billion moredollars than any of you, like Operation
billion block. My feelings are fun. Yeah, here's Randy Moss when he

(34:51):
took the stage. Why the fuckdid we cheat when I was there?
This is all That's all the clipis to all the clips. It's unfair
to Randy. If you had deflatedthe balls, that guy would have caught
them falling out of space. Ialso love so good. At the end,
Tom Brady admits to like doing it. I don't know if here's a

(35:14):
hitting or it was more probable thannot that I was generally aware that someone
may have deflated my footballs. Youcould have just given me the twenty million
and I just told you I fuckingdid. I don't know. Did he
mean that like I would have justtaken the money and told you that I

(35:36):
did it because I wanted the money, Or did you just admit to doing
it? I don't know. Canlike fake that its tongue in cheek there,
Yeah, it's a good question.I don't know because his face is
kind of like is he joking?I don't know if he's joking. None
of it matters. Now that's fairto do it? Yeah, right,
here's more of Tom Brady. Here'shim, I guess he's got a joke
for the Buffalo Bills call themselves theBills Mafia. Yah, how are you

(36:00):
the fucking mafia? At least themafia has a ring you can kiss.
Oh get it? Tom? Ido feel like is he like spent more
time roasting the fans of other footballteams than like the people who have who
roasted him? You know, So, I don't know that makes sense.

(36:21):
He's never gonna be funny. Wheneverhe had was written by someone else,
and he can barely deliberate. Yeah, here's here's more. You have seven
rings we hold on. I needto find the one where she's talking about
doing it. Yeah, oh that'sright, Which is interesting. I feel
like I saw her on a podcastrecently and she has become celibate. Well,

(36:44):
she has a boyfriend since she gotsober, she said on definitely not
celibate because she on this road.She goes, you guys are gonna call
me a bunch of names, aregonna call me a slut and this and
that, Like, I do havea boyfriend. He is here, but
like bringing on and like so shewas saying that I'm in a monogamous really
relationship. Here here's some more nickyglazier. I don't know what this clip

(37:04):
is exactly. Yeah, you're great. First, you're the hottest person I've
ever seen in my life. Ishouldn't be able to talk to you.
I can't even handle it. Uncomfortable, it's insane. I listen tonight,
there's gonna be a lot of jokesabout me being like a depraved, come
guzzling slut, And I just wantto say, for the record, I

(37:25):
do have a boyfriend. We've beentogether for ten years. He's a love
of my life. He's here tonightand I just he's sitting right over there,
and I want to say publicly,I would shoot you in the fucking
face for a lottery ticket to suckthis guy's dick. I cut to Dana

(37:45):
White. He's loving it. Hewas on my fantasy team last night.
My plug HATTI, I would showyou what the NFL is making me cover.
But seriously, you really are.I mean, you're the best to

(38:07):
ever play for too long. Imean she also she had great things to
say, and you know it mixedbeen between some really mean things. That
was good. She was. Shewas a killer last night. So yeah,
it's I guess apparently pretty long,like three hours, so there's a
lot that you know, we justgave you a couple of the but I
tuned in. The marker was atlike two hours and eighteen minutes, and

(38:29):
it still went on for it feltlike almost another hour. I was like,
damn, I'm gonna try and dothe other two tonight. I'm gonna
see see what I can get throughat least. Yeah, all right,
what else did we not touch ontoday? Hey, GSA discovers a bag
of snakes and passengers pants at theairport mix. That's what they said.
It's just a boner, like,that's just my wiener, I'm snaking dog.

(38:52):
So that's that happened. Terrifying.I guess that's it. Well,
I'm still mad at you, astronauttelling America Strada was in Fallout. I
didn't really even notice. I mean, now that you say it, I
remember the scene didn't even such abig chips like, it didn't even register
to me that he was there.Look at look at how hurt he is.
I have respect that. I'm justdisappointed. Great, he's great.

(39:15):
I mean this might not be hisstarring role, but we'll see. Chips
was it? Then he went onto forty forty eight seasons some Spanish soap
opera, and he was never sawthe light of day again. Oh what
happened to him until now? Andthere are certain circles he's still demand.
Yeah, Montrella, I feel likein the and when Chips was still going
strong, he was, you know, did some cameos like they used to
do in those shows. But thenyeah, he just disappeared into Spanish land.

(39:37):
Would you did you like Fallout?Do you like that good? Yeah?
Because you normally don't like that kindof stuff. No, it exceeded
my expectations for sure, when he'snot upset about ancillary characters. The rest
of it was ancillary. Watch yourmouth and Laura finished it, and you
know, I asked the Lord today, what'd you like more? Three Body
Problem or Fallout? And I likedFallout better just because, first of all,

(40:00):
by the end I was it wasI didn't exactly I wouldn't say I
kept it on in the background,but I wasn't maybe fully paying attention,
and I felt like it was easierto do that with Fallout than Three Body
Problem. Like Three Body Problem,I ended up like rewinding, like when
you're not paying attention it's like youactually miss stuff, yeah, and you
kind of have to stay on top. It's pretty it's a good show,

(40:21):
but it can be a bit convolutedat times. You look away for three
minutes and you've missed a whole thing. Subtitled No through a bout a problem.
It's got parts of it that arebut it's mostly English. I keep
everything subtitled anyway, so I don'teverything because the guy who wrote it's Chinese,
and I think the show starts inChina. But like it's their quick
scenes, you know what I mean, Like it's a it's an English show.

(40:43):
Have you seen Two Body Problems?Two Body Problems? Different things?
The prequel? Right? Yeah,I want to watch it, but when
I looked it up on Netflix,I got stuck with three knuckle shuffle?
Have you seen that? Yeah,it's pretty good. I learned that from
my shop teacher. WHOA, yeahthat'll happen. That's abuse. So yeah,
those shows are good. I startedwatching gen V over the weekend.

(41:05):
A friend of mine told me tostart watching it, which is The Boys
spin off. Oh there's a spinoff. Yeah it's okay. Actually it's
just as edgy and a graphic asthe Boys. There's this one character who
can gets small like ant man,and like she's like a college kid and
some guy like they're starting to hookup, and he's like, can you
get small and then jump on mydick? So she gets small and you
just see her like crawling up anddown this guy's dick and slapping his balls

(41:27):
like she's riding a bull. Interesting, it's hilarious. The show. It's
not as good as the Boys,but it's it's okay. How is the
special effects? It's really good.It's still up there with the Boys.
Nice And he said, Boys,they're coming out with another season. Yeah,
yeah, I just saw like twodays ago. They just released the
trailer for season four, which willbe out I think June thirteenth or something
like that. So I really ama big fan of that show. I

(41:49):
got I gotta watch season three againbecause I don't remember it. It's short,
so he should be good, right, it's like six episodes. It
pisses me off when they do that. I don't know. Maybe, well,
you can only ride anus and midgetform for so long, but that's
the spin off. Who knows true? The next Boys could have be in
a vagina. Anything could happen.Yeah, I wouldn't. I wouldn't put
it past them exactly. It's like, what's the deadest Quaid movie in space?

(42:12):
That's right, inner space, butit's a space made that yet I
bet you there's an inner space pornknock, but there's several space because you
don't replace greatness like d Q marshort it was pretty great, Martin was
great. Did you finish Baby Reindeer? I am not finished with that,

(42:34):
but that is just a nightmare ofa situation, certain certainly in a parking
lot. Fred Meyer over the weekend. What are you watching right now,
Beef? Besides, I've still beentrying to wrap up your Crown Crown.
I've got like I think a seasonleft of that. That's the dentist movie.
Yes, all about building new newcrowd route. It's season one is

(42:58):
called Root Canal. You're gonna DentalRestoration Show. It's pretty nice. Nice.
Well, I need something to watchafter I get don gin V and
some beautiful so, uh, maybeI'll try the Crown. I don't know
the Crowns. I mean you betterbe in for it. Like it's it
starts way back in the day andit takes you up through you know,
modern modern, it's got that girlin it who's an alien that you like,

(43:21):
Oh, from Queen's Gambit, youknow, the actors. The Queen's
Gambit is what I was thinking of. The actors get switched up periodically,
which takes a little you know whatI mean. You're like, I hang
when shows do that, you know, Like I guess one of the characters
from gin V died after this firstseason. He got like a motorcycle accident.
So they're gonna have to do that, and that I understand, you
know, but like it's really frustrating, you know, like remember in Better

(43:44):
Call Saul, there was that oneguy who kept showing up and then the
final season comes along and it's completelydifferent. Know who that is? They
did that on Game of Thrones too, but actually it worked out better.
The Game of Thrones actor that theyreplaced him with was much better than the
original son. But yeah, itreally bothers me. It does take you
a little bit too, like wait, who is this guy? Why she
talked to him? Like we knowwho the fuck he is? Going all
amp viv on you. But theCrown did get me up to speed on

(44:07):
a lot of the holes that Ididn't understand because it's historically accurate, right.
I like even the casting, likewhen you google pictures of the people,
like they did an incredible job.That's great. I like that.
I'll just tell you why the Kinghas sausage fingers or is that next season?
That one hasn't come out yet.But I did not realize that Princess

(44:28):
Diana and Charles were basically disaster fromthe get go. I had no idea,
nor did I realize how young shewas when he started courting her.
The level of deep dive that myhouse is doing on Princess Diana right now,
it's a three month project. Mykid had to pick off a list,
and she picked Princess Diana, Soyou want to talk about the ins
and outs of her life. Igot her all the way down to boarding

(44:50):
school right now. It's pretty incredible. The aids awareness on that lady as
early as it was apparently saved alot of lines. I'll have to check
that out. Has anybody's seen TheJing Part two? I've watched the first
episode of it. What do youbecause I almost did it last night.
What do you think? Oh?I think it's great because it worth The
first episode is basically just kind ofrecapping what happened, But is is it

(45:12):
gonna be good? Because listen,Making a Murderer was great and then the
second season was shit. Well thereat least in that Figer, they weren't
trying to like uh, there wasno like gotcha, like whatever. It
was just like basically, can youbelieve that this whole thing happened? And
so that is like the second partis just the fallout, or seems to
be. I've only seen the firstepisode, so I don't I don't know
where they're going to take it toor what the plan is. I love

(45:35):
the first one, so maybe I'llgive it. You forgot that I had
started that. I think I'm onlyone episode in. The story is super
interesting to me. I need agood murder doc, a good murder story.
Check it out. All right,Well, there you go. Just
what that's what we're watching right now. We will see tomorrow. We've got
more tickets to Pearl Jam with thatnew game that we're gonna call Pearl Jumbled,

(45:57):
and Laura's going to sing another PearlJam song as best as you can
as any better. I can't asforest as I can. Which songs you
do today? Even flow. Letme hear a little bit heard. Yeah
hah, hell hate it, Harry, yeah, hurd her eh heah.
You might think it's easy. Thefirst guy got it wrong. Oh yeah,
the first guy. Yellow lead better. Yeah, yellow leadbetter. No,
it's definitely not easy. Yeah.So tomorrow it's seven thirty, we

(46:20):
will play the game again for thetickets. We'll see you then, money
trans terminated. You've been listening toTanner, Drew and Laura's Donkey Show,
heard daily at one oh five ninethe brew dot com. May God have
mercy on all of our souls.