I'm Not Coming Out. I'm Welcoming People In | with Lewis Johnson - 3 Parallels Podcast

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Or welcome back to the Three p Les podcast which
a host the Doctor Jason Branch, where we rediscover who
we were, embrace who we are, and make room for
who we're trying to become. And on today's show, you
already know when I bring family, we're gonna have a
good time and we just biding you'll in because we
do this all the time. So who I'm bringing back

(00:21):
to the show. Ooh, I think this made me my
first repeat guest. I think if I'm please excuse me
if I'm misquoting. And I have you all to know
that this particular guest was the first guest that I
had a chance to practice with to start this podcast,
and he was a totally different version of himself at
that time, which you can listen, go back and listen,

(00:43):
and I cannot wait to reintroduce him to you all
today without further ado, ladies and gentlemen and everyone else
in between, I would love to bring back to the show,
mister future doctor Louis Johnson. Welcome back to the show.

Speaker 2 (00:58):
Baby, future doctor. That feel good. That feels good.

Speaker 1 (01:08):
That's when I'm talking.

Speaker 2 (01:09):
We put in the universe about four years ago and
we're going to keep it right there, So why not
thank you for having me that.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
It's about absolutely happened. Yeah, so let's little wing got
waste time. We're starting in the living room, that's going
down the basement. So I'm curious to know down here
in his basement, at this card table that we are
right now, that you invited and allowing everybody in. I'm
curious to know what's happened since our first recording to
where you are now.

Speaker 2 (01:37):
Oh yeah, from our first reporting. So I am father,
I'm a father, and uh, it has been a worldwid
I'm just gonna leave it at that.

Speaker 3 (01:57):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (01:57):
He is a team and man, oh man, I am
on my choes at all times, all times, and it
has been the greatest blessing of my entire life that
has shaped me into the person I am now, the father,

(02:19):
I am, the human that I am, and continues to
shape me into the person I am becoming truly, and
the decisions I have made for myself, the choices I've
made to protect my peace and do what is best
for my family. I love it.

Speaker 1 (02:37):
I love it. I love it. So I am curious
because we're in a basement at the card table, where
just out of curiosity you mentioned, you know, last show,
you were not about this show a year later. You're
not only a father, but you're a father who a
fifteen year old come like a minute talking about there's
a lot of things missing here. So if we're open

(03:00):
to sharing the missing pieces, because I'm sure I'm not
the only one thinking like he wouldn't a dad and
I got a fifteen year old, like what happened? What happens?

Speaker 2 (03:08):
So sharing, yeah, store, absolutely, it was. It's been a long,
arduous process and there are aspects I won't share for
you know, to protect that piece between him and I.
But you know, the journey literally started a technically started

(03:29):
back in twenty twenty two when I made that decision
to adopt and to go down that path. And it
has been a very intentional journey from the entire time.
So for you know, anyone who doesn't know, like what
it looks like to you know, go through foster to adopt,

(03:52):
which is, you know, the process that I've navigated very
intentional as well. There's a lot of trainings that there's
a lot of going into the basement when it comes
to learning about your you know, the resource parent adoptive

(04:13):
parents past their history family history. So we were in
that basement all the time. I was what's going on here?
And I can't say enough Jason, like I can't say
it up for any parent individual who's looking to go
through that process. Just the importance of therapy and doing

(04:38):
your work. So when I you know, any of the paperwork,
like technically, if you really want to be technical, this
whole process would have been for me completed back in
twenty twenty three or so. However, that was really intentional
about healing my childhood trauma. I've already been in therapy

(05:01):
almost sixteen years now. However, like kind of address things
over time, but this was like, oh, I need to
address some things because I don't want to have a
youth in this space where I'm bringing my stuff onto them.
And I always said, and I feel like it's the
start of a book title in or podcast of just

(05:23):
like I never wanted to sign any paperwork with trauma.
I never wanted to. It wouldn't have been Lewis's name,
it would have been trauma dash Lewis.

Speaker 1 (05:34):
Lewis, you cannot be coming back on this show.

Speaker 2 (05:38):
Aney, you just got I did I did two honey bum. Sorry.
I couldn't help it. It was really intentional, d Like
it was. I was like, I can't, like we have
to break these that generational trauma, like it has to
be broken. And you know, even though you know we

(06:01):
may not be blood, I can still carry that trauma
onto him, like becoming family, it still exists, like just
because you know, like so I didn't want to. So
I've been very intentional about that process. And you know,
going to the process of reading through like his child profile,
what you have to go through, but all the steps, clearances,
all that you have to do prior to that getting

(06:23):
to that stage. And then for us, you know, that
journey in the fall was really really challenging. So you know,
he didn't come to live here until the winter. However,
throughout the fall, and I met him so after we
recorded our podcast like last year, you know, I met

(06:44):
him shortly after that, and you know what that process
looked like. He lived a little further out, I'll just
say that. So and it required me to travel sometimes
times in a given week, sixteen hours of travel. That's
not including work or anything like that, leton not including

(07:06):
going to work in just life, Like it was like
sixteen hours of travel to pick him up, to bring them,
you know, here to that connection all of it. So
the fall was really hard, and that's a whole other
probably like ted, talk in the future when I'm feel
ready to fully talk about all that, But it was,

(07:26):
it was tough, and this experience now has its challenges
because of as we know, trauma, it always coming back
to trauma. However, you know, I feel that because of
my experience, my knowledge, my own feeling, it has allowed
me to be apparent to him in in a very

(07:53):
beautiful and organic way where there is trust and love
and just a lot of healing and good stuff, a
lot of yeah I'm had.

Speaker 1 (08:08):
With some honey, but some honey, yeah, yeah, I love it.
Thank you man, Thank you for allowing us, and thank
you for sharing again. If we're in the basement, we
started in the basement. And the reason I wanted to
get your inside, your input, your experience, because there's so
many people that's at the wall of being stuck trying

(08:28):
to make the right decision, not recognizing it's not what's right,
it's what's best. And Lewis, you did what was best
for you and your son. And I'm proud because I've
been on the journey right next to you throughout this process.
And what I want to share with the listeners that
I know you probably may not share, but I want
to share it to give you those flowers is the

(08:52):
intentionality behind it. So for those who are interested in
the adoption, trying to adopt, thinking about it, I need
you to hear the story. You know you were very
intentional about it, and you knew like you dropped a bar.
I cannot put the old me, that trauma version of
me on that paper because I had to put him
somewhere where he doesn't come in messing up, and I

(09:14):
had to set a boundary great enough, I'm just giving
y'all what here, what he told me. I had to
set up a boundary where whenever he does show up
at the door, I let him know where he can go.
Not that he's not coming back, but I'm in control
of who's in and who's out of my home literal
figurative of the whole non And that's one part. The

(09:34):
next part I want you all to hear if you
heard the intentionality around being strategic and how I introduce
someone to my home that I'm going to care for period.
This is a black male therapist who also has a
therapist who's been working on himself, who was intentional about
setting up a space mentally, physically, emotionally, literally for someone

(09:58):
not knowing who does it matter? Does it matter? Boom?
Third Part three. I gotta give it. I have you
all to know. I'm gona share this in Lewis. I
didn't not give a little for the permission. But we
are organic. Put a old stick on my forehead. Okay,
we are just organic. We always have and we will continue.
What Louis did not share about his intentionality is Lewis

(10:19):
decided before now I don't know the timeline, but before
he moved forward with the adoption, he adopted a dog.
He became a dog bad first. Uh yeah, he was intentional.
So come on, I need y'all to see this. It
wasn't like, let me deal with Trump, let me bring
here that. No, let me learn how to take something,

(10:41):
take care of something outside of myself, outside of a plant.
Come on, I need y'all.

Speaker 2 (10:47):
To see this.

Speaker 1 (10:48):
And did it and did it well. And his dog
by the name fear. I'm sorry, I'm so again. I
was in it. I was there, so I learned about
fears back then which connected to Lewis's third episode which
ain't even drop wein't even record yet, related to Beyonce

(11:12):
and the three parallels. I need you all to see
this in real time. Okay, though who Lewis is becoming
is at the level of Beyonce mentally, physically, emotionally, I
have an abundance. I have a mastery on being the
best version of me possible on a level of the behive.
I need y'all to see what we're seeing.

Speaker 2 (11:33):
I have to talk about it.

Speaker 1 (11:34):
I have to talk about it. I gotta talk about it.
So I shared that you did. You're gonna shore that not,
but I wanted to bring that up because that talks
about intentionality and you being like willing to learn things
you never knew to be a good dad, a great dad,
a father, and regardless of our lived experience and our

(11:56):
father's you know, we get to decide how we're going
to be as father's and you had a chance to
begin figuring you out as a son, as a father,
powerful powerful Mike drop. So I didn't want to open
the floor. If you anything you want to share.

Speaker 2 (12:14):
About that piece, It's true, It's true like you and
I'm just realizing actually when we met, I didn't have
Sash yet. I'm thinking about Yeah, I didn't get hurt,
so that we were.

Speaker 1 (12:26):
Thinking about it, you were thinking about it, think about it,
and I'm on top of the whole time out, time out,
I got another one on top of before you make
the decision. You were doing all this research about dogs.
Come on, now, I was there, I was there. I
learned about dogs. I ain't never heard of my life.

Speaker 2 (12:47):
I did do a lot of research and almost like,
I don't want to say throw that research out the window,
but literally throw that research out of the window. There's dogs,
but there's no Sasha. There's no Sasha out there one.
So I love it.

Speaker 1 (13:04):
Oh man, So we finish Swiss Gears because with that,
well we I love how the show just it just flows. Okay,
we're still in the base mo. We've been going to
another room because we talked about dads, we talked about fathers,
we talked about men. And for me, this episode is
really special because it happened organically and I don't know
what's gonna happen, but I'm excited about whatever that is,

(13:26):
because this is how you break generational curses. It's by
talking about things we usually don't talk about. Our have space,
protection and safety to talk about them. So what came up?
I gotta tell the backstory to the front or y'all
know me. Okay. By the way, grabby journals if you
ain't got one yet, pick it up, okay, because you're
gonna write these things down. We got honey bonds that's
gonna come through. We got some gems, some jewels, some ripples, breadcrumbs,

(13:47):
they're coming. Okay. So this last this Wednesday, this past
Wednesday's episode July second, which was actually my son's birthday.
Everything is intentional on this side, come on his birthday.
The episode dropped on his birthday, where I talked about
things that I was afraid to talk about publicly out
of fear that I could possibly get canceled. So because

(14:11):
of that fear, which is one side of the coin,
I decided to connect with my board people that I love,
if my trust respect, that's in my boardroom where it's
love is energy, it's protection and safety. And I reached
out to my board to share, Hey, I want you
to check out the episode. These are people from all
different walks of life. Part of LGBTQ plus community, some

(14:32):
not allies advocates the whole now. So I spread it
out to a small circle of people to get input
and insight, and everyone shared their thoughts and some things
like hm, hm, I need to consider this, blah blah
blah blah. And then when I got Lewis's response back,
it was a moment where I paused, and that pause
was perspective that I wasn't considering at the time of

(14:56):
the recording. So Louis being Lewis authentic as all it out,
Hey have you thought about have you thought about it?
And he stopped me in my tracks and I was like, no,
not enough to consider. And that's what opened the door
of the conversation that we're having now of Hey, let's

(15:17):
talk about perspectives, and that's what we're here for. So
I want to open the door to dive right back
in where we started connected to masculinity or toxic masculinity
and pride and Amazon and all those things, like, let's
talk about it because for all of you listening now,
you now have access to something that does not happen

(15:39):
often publicly. It just it happens, but not publicly at
this level of maturity, emotional intelligence, connection and everything else
in between. So prepare yourself because we don't know, but
we don't so let's go what's you got?

Speaker 2 (15:59):
Ah? So yeah, as Jason said, you know, he sent
me the podcast ahead of time, like I don't want
to get canceled, although he also had a gem in there.
What was the gem? Hold on? It was except I
can't be canceled, And there was also there there was

(16:19):
something also a Bible thing in there too that like
I was like, I'm gonna get both.

Speaker 1 (16:24):
I'm get.

Speaker 2 (16:27):
Because but no, you know, he you know, I listened
to the podcast through and just really sat with it,
and it was, you know, focused on you know, what
the l G B t Q I plus experience you know,
might look like in regards to masculinity. And what I
appreciated so much, Jason was your authenticity and speaking about

(16:50):
your experience and when it's your experience in my in
my humble opinion, it's my opinion, nobody else's. You can't
be canceled. It's your opinion, this is your lived experience.
It'd be a different story if you were continuing to
approach things in the way that you know you've shared
about in the podcast. However, you were speaking about who

(17:14):
you were, not who you are who you were, and
we all, you know, as individuals, have that experience. You know.
I can only speak for myself that, you know, although
I identify as a gay man, I don't know everything that's
everything about the community because I'm only me. This is

(17:36):
my experience. What it means to be gay to one
person doesn't mean that way to me, and that that
is okay, that is perfectly fine. Like even you talked
about the pink shirt and I see you rocking it today.
I love it. Also, hope those nails are done too.
Just saying no, but like really I had that perspective

(18:03):
too growing up, of oh my goodness, if I wear
this pink shirt, it means X, Y and Z. And
in my case maybe it's it that's the side, but
that's also in this case. However, It's like I wish

(18:25):
I had someone in my life to tell me that,
like it doesn't matter what you're wearing. But I had
that of like I wear paink, people are going to
find me out, people are going to know, you know,
if I paint my nails. I remember being jeez, I
don't remember how old I was, but like maybe like
seven eight years old or something like that, and getting

(18:48):
access to like one of my sister's nail polish and
I remember like not doing all my nails, doing like
one nail and I got it on the TV. I
had to scrubbed the TV to get rid of everything.
But like there was something validating about that and for me,
and it was also scary because it's like I can't

(19:10):
be found out where now I'm I don't know jealous
is the word, but like jealous in a way of
what things look like now in society. Yes, it's a
shit show. We're not going to thes are very tumultuous
right now, and that is true. However, though what the

(19:33):
perspective I have to like to see, you know, youth
and teens and you know, be able to just hint
their nails and wear certain things where for me, I
literally remember having like going my first ever concert was
the American Idol Concert and it was when with the

(19:55):
season with the two David David Artilltta and David Cook.
And I've remember buying a shirt there. I would not
wear it out in public though it was literally just
an American Idol shirt. It was literally in my mind, oh,
this insinuates that I'm not heterosexual. I don't know where

(20:16):
the mindset came, but wow, but also speaks to that.

Speaker 1 (20:20):
So curious because we're here, We're in a basement.

Speaker 2 (20:22):
Uh huh.

Speaker 1 (20:24):
What was it about? Was it the event? Was it
the shirt? Was it people who were about to win?
Like what, I'm just curious the connection.

Speaker 2 (20:30):
Yeah, I don't know. I genuinely wish I knew like
they had won because they go out on tour after
you know, the season ends and everything, and I remember
like it was also my first concert I went to,
like first concert ever, but also first concert that I
went to that I knew I identify other than heterosexual at

(20:53):
that time. And in my mind, like just my reaction
to the people on stage that were men and all
of that. In my mind there was a thought that
even though I'll never see these people ever again, like
that we're at the concert, in my mind, going out

(21:14):
in public, it was a way of being found out.
I can't wrap my mind around that thinking now, but yeah,
that was the part of it.

Speaker 1 (21:25):
Oh my god, this is this is the parallels And
now this parallels is that mirror image which we talked
about briefly, and now you're sharing all of it where
we both have different lived experiences of placing identity around clothing,
you know, around of article article of clothing and feeling

(21:46):
so moved and connected to this idea and belief that
we chose to live life differently because of it. And
now you know, we're in a different place in space
in our lives where being able to look back at
how things were then, how they are now, who we
were then, who we are now, and just seeing this
kinetic energy and connection to community because the core is

(22:10):
the same as human beings. We took an inanimate thing
and gave it meaning that did not serve us. Louis,
get out of get out of here, Get off the show,
Get your ass off the show. Wow. Wow, Wow, So

(22:33):
I am curious. How did you get to a place
again who you were, who are coming? How did you
get to a place of growing up in that space
or environment and overcoming the fear, overcoming the anks, overcoming
the worry of what people think and you know, I
can't the shame, the judgment, the guilt. How did you

(22:55):
if you have I don't know if you have an eye,
but how did you transition to okay?

Speaker 2 (23:01):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (23:02):
How did you make the transition. Oh I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Yeah,
I will say this, how did you make the transformation? O?

Speaker 2 (23:11):
See doing that work always? This is why we always vibe.
How did I make that transformation? It wasn't easy and
it was really long and difficult. And while I am,
I would say even and I'll go back to it,
like comfortable in you know, my skin now at almost

(23:36):
thirty five years old. Like, while I'm comfortable, there is
still a very inherent fear that lives in me just
being a black gay man in our society on July thirty,
twenty twenty five. There is that exists. So I just

(23:57):
want to name that, and I want to name that
to whoever was listening to this podcast right now, that
it's a real fear. It's my belief that you can be,
you know, really comfortable in your skin. And there's just
a genuine fear that lies there. Like we're the community

(24:19):
black community, lgbt q I plus community, immigrant community for
being attacked. What's happening, We're being attached. There is that
fear that just lies within me. However, I will say
that what keeps me as grounded as I can be,
that is and missed everything going on. And that also,

(24:42):
I would say, help with that transformation is the support
that I had throughout my life, the support in friends
like when I, you know, came out to them or
you know, I try to try to almost actually steer
away from the word of coming out and more like
when I welcome people in.

Speaker 1 (25:03):
It didn't I tell you get the hell off, get
off my show. I'm done with as you offered my show. Yes, yes,
we got to take We're not gonna leave it. We
are not going to leave that. That is too good
not to eat up right now. So let's take a boss,
and you changed the narrative, if you could, We're gonna

(25:25):
cop off the interstate just for a minute at this
rest of because that change of perspective created a change
in narrative, which can create a change in who you were.
So if you if you could tell us that, tell
us that piece.

Speaker 2 (25:37):
Yeah, when I decided that I'm going to welcome you
into my journey and what that looks like, it offered
a sense of control that sometimes felt was not accessible

(26:01):
just being a gay man, like you know the experience
of having to come out and you know, sometimes being
outed to come out of the cloud, the whole night,
all of that. When I change that perspective of like
I will choose to let you in, things look different,
even more so, especially because so that was you know,

(26:21):
when I decided to let more people in, like really
on a not on a public stage. It's not like
I did, don't sage or anything, but like I remember
it was December of two thousand and eight where I
just it was the time of Facebook when I changed,
like who you're interested in? I don't even know if
they still have, Like that was me taking ownership and

(26:45):
really like I'm allowing you to learn a little more
about me now and you can't control that narrative about me.
And from then it has been exactly that, where you know,
I the way I approached my life and others too,
is that this is just a person. Like they're you know,

(27:07):
changing that narrative of like, oh you're heterosexual to you
identify such. No, you're just a person until you decide
whether you want to welcome me in to learn more
about you.

Speaker 1 (27:20):
Powerful powerful, You just took all of your power back.
You just took all of like that's a boundary, that's
a standard, that's authentically, that's protection, safety, it's so much, man,
the thing is layered. I'm talking about bad potato, sour cream,
onion chives a rare steak. Last of why this all

(27:43):
on potato?

Speaker 2 (27:43):
That's what.

Speaker 1 (27:45):
That's what you just gave. And I need you to
know that you just gave a listener or several listeners,
permission to change the narrative. And that narrative, man, is
so powerful, and that's why I wanted to stop for
a minute. It's so powerful because it's transformational. Again that word,
it just keeps coming up because you know what I

(28:07):
heard before again connecting parallels. What I heard before was
what you were taught and told, you know, coming out
in the closet, different things like from the culture and
the community, which may not have been encouraging positive, balance, healthy,
you know, it may not have been. Yeah, it serves
a purpose, but does this help me or harm me?

(28:29):
And what you shared, I'm inviting people in to me.
That begins with love period. I love me enough to
bring you in. I've been living this life boo boo,
I've been here. You're new, So I'm inviting. That is
powerful because it takes ownership of the house that you

(28:53):
get to live in or you choose to live in,
and all of us, every single day we get to
choose life what house we live in based off of
who we were, who we are becoming. Those three houses and.

Speaker 2 (29:04):
Going back to your houses, I welcomed you into the
living room in the attic. You're just living. That's whether
you go any further.

Speaker 1 (29:14):
Come on, you may even have you made not any offer.
Seat yet you stand standing. I love it. I love it.
I love it. I love it. Oh man, powerful stuff.
So to the listeners, this is for you. There are
no coincidences. I don't believe in that. This is a
ripple and a breadcrumb. And what Lewis just gave to
you is not just what he thinks. What he thought about,

(29:37):
what he tried, what he's speaking about is what he knows.
And many of us get caught up in what we
think and we don't do because of what we think,
and we think about the outcome that we already predicting
control that doesn't work in our favor, versus changing a narrative,
changing perspective, and deciding this is who I am, and
I'm deciding to allow you access to me based off

(29:58):
of what works for me at this time don't take
your shoes off. You ain't staying on. Come on right,
which means that's what you're that's what you're going to
teach to your son, that's what you're going to encourage
to your clients, that's what you're gonna encourage to your
supervisors and your students. And I'm allowing you in. It's

(30:20):
a privilege to be here. Oh my god, Louis, this
is just you man. You get my nerve. Okay, going
back because this took us. I want to go back
because we were going somewhere related to man transformation.

Speaker 2 (30:39):
How I get transformation, so the support of people in
my life, and I recognize that, you know, that may
not be the experience of everyone, especially you know, youth
and teens and even adults who are seeking to welcome
others into their story and their and you know, I

(31:02):
can only speak for me that having those supportive people
and that wasn't necessarily family right away. And when I
say family, like biological family, that wasn't necessary the case.
It was chosen family at that time that I were
really supportive and encouraging it just that I felt like

(31:23):
I had a safe place to land whenever I was
with them, and I think it may have also what
lent itself to is that it was also my senior
year of high school at the time too, and I
just I didn't care anymore too like this just like
you people any ever again, anyways, it just really allowed

(31:49):
to live a life that felt true to myself. And
then when I went off to college, was like a
fresh start. So it's just I don't know anybody here
kind of saying. And it's been like that since and
has continued to grow ever since. And it's a constant.
It's a constant, I want to say, struggle, but something

(32:12):
that I'm always navigating. Like I just this past weekend,
I was on vacation. It's a myrtle beach and there
were you know, individuals there who you know, asked me,
you know, I was with my son and everything, and
I remember they were offering just like a cookie we

(32:33):
had just checked in or something like that, just a
chocolate cookie, and the individual is just like, do you, like,
do you also have like a wife there that provides
us to like And I was like, no, just my
son and I, just my son and I. But it's
even then, it's like, you know, you know, would you

(32:55):
like an extra one. Do you have a partner you
want to provide this to kind of thing, But it
was just like you have a wife, you know, it's
just not here right now?

Speaker 1 (33:04):
Yes, yes, And what I do want to share like
having that, knowing that experience in that and still deciding
do I correct, do I acknowledge? Do I you know?
It's a thing, It's a real thing. And I appreciate
you sharing this experience because the parallels for me as

(33:27):
a new clinician. And I don't know if you even
know this story during our time in supervision. I don't
know if I'm pretty sure I did, but I may
not have one of the biggest lessons because I don't lose.
So one of the biggest lessons I learn as a
new clinician about intersectionality as BTQ I a plus community.

(33:49):
And I definitely also want you to talk about Internet intersectionality.
That's another piece learning this and not being aware just ignorant,
my ignorance. I made the same mistake that that person did.
And I had a client, I had a colleague, actually
this was a colleague and we just met white male
and you know, I asked, Hey, you got a family

(34:10):
wife at home, and he gave me a look like nah,
like kind of puzzled, like, hmm, what would make you
think I have a wife at the house. It was puzzled,
but it was patient, and he corrected me. He said, actually, no,
my partner is a man and we do blah blah blah.
And I was like, oh shit, imagine. My thought was,

(34:32):
imagine that that was a client. In addition, this is
a colleague. An addition, this is a person who I
made an assumption because of my ignorance. Again talking about
who I was, even at this level with licensure, licensed
degrees and everything else. I wasn't aware of my privilege

(34:53):
and my lens. So I only put him on one
side of the spectrum. And when I look at the spectrum,
I look at two sides of the corner. I learned
this from Uncle Myron, our uncle Miran. Me and Louis
got a famous, rich, wealthy uncle named Iron Godam and
he don't know he adopted us. But we're gonna be
on this plane one day shooting shit. Okay, it's gonna happen, hey,

(35:13):
whatever season. Uncle Mayron gonna be both so sick of
me before we even meet, Like yo, right, you know,
but anyway, sidebar, So that's we're talking about my uncle.
He talked about two sides of the coin. We get
caught up on one side, you know, And if you
look at life, everything has two sides, you know. One
coin has two sides. A slice of bread two slides,

(35:35):
two sides of the bread. You don't just eat one
side of the bread. So I had the opportunity to
pivot because of what this person exposed me to and
I never made that error again. I learned from that
and never did it again because he provided a space
for me to learn and not you know, feel judged
critical shame. He could have did me how he may

(35:58):
have felt based off of my response and what sharing
another lived experience of the assumptions that people put on us,
not knowing us. And every day you get to decide
what you do with that information. And to me, what
you choose to do can help you, can hurt you,

(36:19):
or it could do all the things that's in between
the gray. We don't know. We don't know, but sometimes
we get caught on this could hurt me, or he
could hurt me, whatever, and we don't And we're sitting
with that while he's living his life insulting someone else,
you know, So, Louis, I'm so glad you brought that up,

(36:39):
just that kindred energy again, Like, we're all learning and
that's what is really important for all of you listening.
I don't care who you are, where you are, your degrees,
your money, it don't matter. We're human first, you strip
everything away. We're human and we're flawed. We're human. We
make mistakes and we don't know. And my challenge to
you all listening is, if I choose to be a

(37:01):
student of life, I'm always in a position to learn.
And if I'm in a position to learn, I'm in
a position to help m hm and no longer hurt.
Because if I remain ignorant and choose to stay that way,
which is a choice, I can continue to hurt people,
who ends up hurting people, who ends up hurting people,

(37:21):
who ends up hurting.

Speaker 2 (37:22):
People truly, truly. Yeah, you just had me thinking about,
you know, my role as a father too, of like
I have done a lot of apologizing to my son.
I'm not perfect, you know, and I acknowledge one It's like, yeah,
I screwed up, screwed up, and that's something unfortunately from

(37:47):
my experienced teens don't always hear like, wait, you screwed
up talking about like no, yeah, I'm messed up.

Speaker 1 (37:55):
Yeah, this is so good. It's so good because oh
man Lewis again, get off the damn show this third time.
I told you time, I told you get off of
my damn show.

Speaker 2 (38:08):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (38:08):
I love this. I love that we do this. I
love we can't again to the listeners, me and Lewis
do this anyway, okay, invite y'alley. I love this because
it speaks to us, you know, on this path, on
this journey to become the best version of us. Because
in every area of service, as a father, as a therapist,

(38:30):
as a supervisor, as a professor, as doctor Johnson mental
like all of these things, we're working very similarly with
all of us. Human beings are going to be, just
like our parents, a complete opposite somewhere in the middle
that applies to all aspects of connection. So my supervisor
just like a complete opposite middle therapist, father, all these things.

(38:53):
So for you, you, very similar to me, took what you
learned from your dad's good. What you love, I'm giving
it back. What you didn't like, I'm not giving at
and what I think you need to have I'm offering
and that is next level because to me, that changes generations.

(39:14):
Like your son is going to know what it's like
for an adult who's in a position of power and
privilege to acknowledge a mistake willing to apologize. Some people
listening right now still waiting on an apology from somebody
who died years ago. They're still waiting and you will
be waiting. Okay, they ain't coming back. You got to

(39:37):
give it to you sometimes when those who can't, even
if they hear, and they're in the Atlanta the Living Dead,
you hear, but you're dead. To me, Louis, I need
you to see what you're doing. I needs you to
see what you're doing. Okay, we don't talk about it. Man,
that changes things. That to me is what masculinity looks like.

(39:58):
Why because I said it? Because I said it, Real
men apologize, right, come on? Why not? Because we got
other quotes out here. Real men don't cheat? Yeah they do? Yeah,
yeah they do? Yeah yeah uh huh. Hold some man,
we don't cheat. Yeah, to do again, we got to

(40:20):
look at things from more than one side, Like I said,
just like the complete opposites somewhere in the middle, and
that's the gray, and you have fully embraced I gotta
give you flowers again. When I first met Lewis, I
got talking about Lewis did not believe in the gray
at all. Lewis was black and white, fuck you, period.

Speaker 2 (40:39):
Four. It was just that, right, fat And now I'm like, no,
talk about right, like, come on, like all of that,
all of.

Speaker 1 (40:47):
That, and now he's in the space of you know,
I had to let go of certain beliefs and ideas
that helped me back, and now the new ideas and
beliefs propels him so far where we can have this conversation.
We're on so many different wavelengths and some of you
all are hearing it and picking up the gyms, the

(41:08):
red curbson ripples, and it's like, that's to me, this
is emotional intelligence. This is what masculinity is. Because we're
having a courageous conversation about us and different parts of us,
and our difference is all we're black men who happen
to be therapists, who happened to go to therapy has
to hag black unicorn with to go horn. Okay, even

(41:29):
though with that there's also another layer that we share
a lot of layers, and there's another level that you
have an experience of that I don't, and I would
love for you to share and educate the listeners related
to intersectionality, where you and I both understand what it
means to be a black man in America, but we
go a step further when you share it. I'm not

(41:51):
only a black man managing to get through America. I'm
also a black gay man managed. And that's the intersection.
So people don't know, man, people don't know. So if
you don't mind sharing what is life like in that space.

Speaker 2 (42:09):
Let me just say it. I'm tired all my life,
all my life.

Speaker 1 (42:19):
Let's go, let's go, and.

Speaker 4 (42:22):
Like we laugh, but really, all my life it has
been a fight before I at conception, let's go before conception,
fighting m I'm.

Speaker 2 (42:34):
Born into this world having a fight simply because of
the color of my skin. Then at an additional layer
because of you know how I identify it mm hmmm,
and just that intersectionality. It's uh, truly, it's tiring. Like

(42:56):
I wish I was joking, Like it's really it's hard,
especially in this time in our society, country, world, However,
like all of it, it's it's hard to navigate it
at times. Not to mention the intersectionality is me as

(43:18):
a therapist too, like then I got to hold all
these clients' story while it is, it's a lot, and
I would say that I end up navigating all of this,
all the multiple layers of this. Really that that self

(43:42):
care piece. I can't express it enough, like truly, like
this upcoming Sunday, sure excited, can't wait. And we talked
about it in the you know last podcast we did together,
you know that black box, like you left me with
a gem only two years ago that has just stuck

(44:02):
with me ever since. And I go back to that
black box. And I'm not going to tell the listeners
right now, you just about to listen to the episode
to hear more.

Speaker 1 (44:11):
About Let's go, I see you.

Speaker 2 (44:16):
To the episode to find out what it is. Let's
go what you know for me, like coming back to
those moments of my blackness and my gayness and what
that means and what that looks like and just the
celebration of it more than anything, and continuing to surround

(44:36):
myself with people that I welcome in and even we're
going to take it even further, surrounding myself with just
the media I welcome into my life. Like I recently
just like deactivated social media again because I was like,
there's a lot happening, and I will decide what I

(44:58):
want to welcome into to my mental space and my
heart and not what I you know, what I don't
want to welcome as well. So it's all about I
just got you the title of this episode, welcoming in,
welcoming in, welcoming and don't welcome something. Got it? Yeah, okay, done, okay,

(45:21):
But really like.

Speaker 3 (45:22):
It is that being able to decide, you know, who's there,
who's coming in the living room, who's even going to
even peer through the window, who's.

Speaker 2 (45:35):
Even going to see the home? Because I might have
like a whole uh blanket, big old blanket, you ain't
seeing that I get to decide. I decide, true, and
really like you know that that intersectionality, it's like if

(45:56):
it isn't one thing, it's another. And you know, also
recognizing too that the privilege I do also have as
just a man in general, I do. I have a
lot of privilege, you know from that standpoint. So yeah,
we could go on and on about.

Speaker 1 (46:15):
That all day long. So let's get ready to go home,
because I've been trying to sing you since we been,
since we started. So let's Garry close out. So one
thing I wanted to bring up going back to you know,
you being on my board, you being a board member,
having access to the show early on because I did
for the listeners, I did have a moment that I consider, Hey,

(46:36):
I could possibly get canceled with sharing this interview, sharing
my truth and I love how you started the episode
talking about how can I be canceled when I'm talking
about my lived experience? And I agree, And in addition,
I have to share because we talked about it. I
can't get canceled because no one truly can get canceled

(46:57):
because where is the rule or rule book on who's
canceled and who's not and what's the criteria. We don't
have it right, and last time I check, I just
won't to talk about facts. Hashtag Will Smith. You don't
get canceled when there's influence, impact, power and prestige and

(47:20):
Kevin Hart, will Smith, you name it. Our heroes are heroes,
you name them. Where people try to cancel and it
got dark for a moment and then the light is
back because you can't cancel somebody who is authentically them.

(47:40):
And when I think about these people and entertainment, sports
and everything else, this is who they are. Who are
you to judge or take away their humanness? And that's
what I noticed, the human is. So I want to
share what Lewis said that made me stop in my tracks,
for you to share your perspective on this, because louis

(48:02):
the feedback Lewis gave, he gave his heart. First, we
talked like we were able to just really get to
the heart, which was enough for me. But Lewis is
on another level. He's just gonna give me that I
want being a member of the community. I need you
to know what could be said and I'm like all
right shoot. And he gave me a few things to consider,

(48:23):
which I did, which I had to check for me
as well. Again learning like it all ended in still learning,
so you know, authenticity, It could be some inconsistency and
that's human. So just being able to normalize and humanize
this experience. But what he said that stopped me in
my tracks was Amazon And this was so powerful where

(48:44):
it's like just think about there's people out here, these
are facts that may have a problem with me talking
about what I'm talking about and being an ally advocate.
And at the same time, you're promoting your journal on Amazon,
which Amazon has been you know, not to support and
different things like that. So I would love to hear
your perspective on what you share with me, and because

(49:07):
I want to, I want to share the size of
the coin and the gray. So if you could share
with the listeners your perspective, I would love for them
to hear.

Speaker 2 (49:15):
Yeah. Absolutely, and I appreciate you giving my flowers and
everything in between, because you know that that kind of
even perspective didn't happen overnight. Like I could have just
listened to it and focused on you know what, you know,
what you said in just the podcast, like the parts
about the lgbtq A plus community and all of that. However,

(49:38):
like I believe that through my feelings and through the
work that I have done and continue to do, allowed
me to zone in on that Amazon that was like, Oh,
get me a second here, like this is what you know,

(50:00):
you're speaking about DEI and inclusion and you know, the
LGBTQI plus community, and then there's this journal out there
that you're promoting that I'm all aboard where I love
the journal and everything on a website that we saw
back in January opposed DEI and removed that off of

(50:20):
their website and such. And here's the flip side. You know,
that same exact thing. You know, I came back to it.
I don't remember the full story, but I remember, you know,
Tabatha Brown who you know all on social media, there
was that same exact experience. It's all a blur now

(50:40):
back in January. But like people were like when target
to the same exact thing, they were like, remove your
stuff off the target, the whole nine yards And it's
not that simple. At the same time, this is something
that has you know, been built for you know, for her,
and you know, there's also a recognition that you're also

(51:04):
building as well, Like at the time you started offering
the journal, that wasn't an issue.

Speaker 1 (51:11):
Come on, facts, come on in.

Speaker 2 (51:13):
Facts an issue. And you know, do I still believe
that Jason finds some you know, black owned businesses and
things that will you hold your journal? Yes? I do,
and I'm full And you know, it also makes me
think that are we allowing them to win by removing

(51:36):
our stuff to come on, are we allowing them to
win by you know, just doing that. That's what they want.
They want remove all of your stuff so that the
black experience, the LGBTQ A plus experience doesn't exist. If
we remove it, then it doesn't exist. So keep your

(51:58):
shit right on there. I still do that active reflection
of like, how do I what other platforms can I
also put this on?

Speaker 1 (52:10):
Yes, yes, Louis this this is it. This is it.
This is exactly what I mean by the gray. You know,
the first conversation, Hey, be mindful, this could be which
I agree with, I have the same I had to
pause once he shared that, and then the other side,
you know, it could be a thing too, like I'm

(52:31):
not going to capture everybody, and that's okay, but you
go a step further with has some time to reflect,
thought about it process. Hey, here's this is what I
mean by being a student and learning and being open.
It's not one dimensional because as you and I both
were processing away from each other other processing the same thing.
To double down on what I thought initially. So when

(52:52):
I thought initially, when Lewis brought this up the first
I was like, Nope, don't put it out there. I
don't want to get canceled. Second thought was, can't cancel
somebody who's somebody Will Smith? Number two, Let's put the
facts out there, and it forced me to look deeper.
You brought up Target, So the issue you know, related

(53:13):
to Amazon and my book being on there, you just
brought a different fact that I didn't even consider. It
was done beforehand, How dare I take it off? And
as you say, it was built. So you're sharing so
many different levels, and I went in a different direction,
connecting at home because again, your connection to Amazon being
part of the LGBTQ community is different from my lived experience. However,

(53:35):
we share again intersectionality. We share live experience being black
men in America who Target made some changes for DEI
initially and then changed it, and I thought about that,
which brings me to where we are right now. I
had to compare the two because I couldn't connect, I
couldn't truly understand the lived experiences for those black man

(54:00):
who happened to be members of the lgbt QIA plus community,
and Amazon didn't have that. What I do have is Target,
So I used Target as my test group. I want
you to see this in real time.

Speaker 2 (54:09):
What happened.

Speaker 1 (54:11):
Lewis gave me an opportunities to consider something different by
challenging a belief right. So I looked at Target, and
I have to look at the history. Target never gave
a shit about black folks last time I check outside
of an ad just won't talk about the history of Target.
When did Target start caring about black folks? The murder

(54:32):
of a particular black man, George Floyd, which moved to
the black Okay, if y'all cat, if y'all not watching this,
Lewis is over here having church Okay in church right,
So I had to connect dots. I had to connect that.
So when did Target start caring about us? I had
to do this myself. When did they start caring the
murder George Floyd, Black Lives Matter movement? That's what changed it.

(54:56):
Where we're considering people from diverse communities, cultures and everything else.
That's when Topter Brown and everybody started to win by
being exposed in this position. Then new management, new leadership,
systems being systems have a new person to charge. And
this country is at you know, the leadership of whoever

(55:19):
runs it, just like any company, any president, any university,
whoever's running the show. That's how everything goes. So until
you running the show, you go with the flow. Meaning
there's some people that work at Target that happened to
be part of a diverse group of background. Did they leave,
did they stop working? Did they stop collecting checks? Probably not.

(55:41):
Their livelihood is a stake. But we ain't even got
to go that far. Where I did go was Target
was Target from the beginning. They decided to be a
different version than themselves temporarily, and then when the laws
or the status of power changed, they went back to
who they've been. And I I'm supposed to be upset

(56:02):
because I don't choose to boycott in the way that
you do, meaning stop shopping there. Because for me, there's
tension in my house right now with me and my wife,
very small, very light, and the tension is how dare
you still shop at Target? And the intention is how
you not? Because? And I say that because they didn't

(56:22):
give a shit about me before. They they're showing me
who they are. Why should I inconvenience myself for the
ignorance of other people. I still shop at Target because
my way of boycotting is different than boy been not
shopping at a store that's it inconvenience for me, I don't.
I don't deal with Walmart, No share't, no dispect. I'm

(56:43):
a different guy now. I don't call them Targe anymore.
It's Target, but I'm calling that so I find my
own way. But just because I don't boycott in the
way that you think I should, because I'm not call
part of the culture, doesn't mean I'm excise or black
card or taking or I don't care. I like talking

(57:03):
about facts and what I know for a fact that
any company, a lot of companies, several companies are in
the same position as a lot of these companies that
made changes because they had to. They had to. It
was in their best interest to get on board with
something because the leadership was black folks, black Lives Matter
movement has to hag the new is make America great?

(57:26):
Guess what we need to get on board? What's the difference?
So we're not just looking at one side of the
corner of the other. I need you to look at
all the gray, because there's two sides of a penny, right,
heads of tails. But I want you to think as
far back as you can to the origin of a
penny one cent. There was conversations that had to happen
with a lot of different people. What are the materials,

(57:47):
what does it mean? What is money?

Speaker 2 (57:48):
What is this?

Speaker 1 (57:49):
What is that? What's the name of it? Who faced
we poured on them? What color is it? Black? Why
do you think the first level of currency was the
color of me and Lewis? Because that's who built it.
If we want to talk about it, and now we're
in twenty twenty five having a discussion, do we keep
this thing? Pennies and people of color? Full circle hashtag ice.

(58:14):
I just need y'all to see it because last time
I checked, even the Bible has negative reviews on Amazon.
These are facts.

Speaker 2 (58:26):
And that was the jem Jason left me with that
made me stop in my tracks when he told us, like,
oh yep, all.

Speaker 1 (58:32):
Day long, all day long. So I'm not going to
be inconvenienced anymore by the ignorance of other people. And
if I'm going to be one sided and look at
one side or twenty I'm not shopping there where people
don't support me. Imagine every other entity that you're a
part of. Your doctor, your lawyer, your educator, your teacher,
your parents, all these different people. That's people. Target is

(58:55):
not an entity. It's a group of people that make
rules around a business. Those people have beliefs, ideas, and
perspective just like us, and sometimes we get it wrong.
That does not mean I have to change how I
choose to live life over somebody else's mistakes. M every

(59:18):
day you get to decide, and I decided not only
am I going to release the episode, me and Louis
gonna have a follow up because Lewis challenged me to
consider something new, different and uncomfortable, and that's what God
is here and that's why you all got all this goodness.

(59:40):
And I'm gonna kick Lewis ass off the show finally.

Speaker 2 (59:44):
After that.

Speaker 1 (59:45):
So two questions, any anything you want to share, any
last thoughts, anything you want to share the community, anything,
And the other I do have a question. You mentioned
three parallels of welcoming people in and it was high school,
it was college, and current. How would you describe those

(01:00:07):
three versions of you allowing people you, Oh yeah, and
we may go over a little time, hope, Okay with that? Okay, yep,
all right?

Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
Oh oh wow yeah. High school, Well, if you're coming
back to it, I was a little baby salamander. Let's go,
I was a salamander even then. And I think if

(01:00:40):
you haven't heard that analogy, go back to that episode
because I'm pretty sure Jason talks about in the podcast too,
so go back to it. But I was even a
salamander then, and I would say back in high school
where the things that people would say would affect me,
and you know, through you know that that personal growth,

(01:01:02):
the connections with others, the lived experiences throughout college, I'm
still you know that soundmander ways, you know, and you know,
throughout my twenties and such as well. And now it
feels like I'm that alligator who guess what I don't
I don't really care. I don't get two ships because.

Speaker 1 (01:01:28):
I just don't period period.

Speaker 2 (01:01:31):
You know, living, you know, at the end of the day,
like I'm always gonna be black, I'm always going to
be gay, and also like I'm just gonna throw another
thing out there that like we've been dealing with these experiences,
especially as black people, like none of this is you
like this is just another day.

Speaker 1 (01:01:53):
Yeah, yeah, it's.

Speaker 2 (01:01:56):
Only becoming a thing because this is facting people that
are not used to it affecting them to get out
the house.

Speaker 1 (01:02:06):
I'm trying to close the door. You start a whole
on the.

Speaker 2 (01:02:10):
I did, but truly, like you know, so you know
that piece. And here's another thing too, like you know
what I want to leave with as well that you know,
Jason shared his perspectives about you know, Amazon and targeting
and you know how he approached things and such, and
guess what, he's still the ship.

Speaker 1 (01:02:32):
Wait a minute, I have nothing but love.

Speaker 2 (01:02:35):
For him because I know within my heart that he
did a genuine reflection about who he is and there's
no cancelation. This is his experience and there's no love
loss ever and there never will be. You can't what
did you say? You can't cancel? Can't cancel somebody because

(01:02:57):
there's somebody something.

Speaker 1 (01:02:58):
Along those lines. Yeah, I'll take that, you know.

Speaker 2 (01:03:01):
And it's also just uh when it comes to cancel
culture too, like why can't we lift people up? Come on,
let's lift them up?

Speaker 1 (01:03:14):
So come on, Oh with that, I gotta put the
ball in it, lift them up by promoting what they
do and not getting caught up on where they do
it or how how they set the platform. Like again, racism,
all these isms is everywhere. When you're dealing with people.
And name one industry that's not driven by people, doesn't exist.

(01:03:38):
Even ai there's somebody doing some programming. That's somebody doing something.
So I value you, Lewis. You are my brother from
another mother. You are you always have a way of listening, learning, sharing, giving, connecting.
It's love, its energy, it's integrity, it's honesty, it's humility.

(01:04:00):
And whenever we connect, it's this every time, Like I
don't know how, we just find ways to just go.
Like we were just talking about referring to client, next
thing you know, next thing you know, a podcast. So
these are the relationships that I value, and to me,
this episode is an example of what masculinity can look like. Lewis.

(01:04:23):
I love you man because you are you. Come on,
grown men in here.

Speaker 2 (01:04:28):
Don't get me emotional, right like, and that's.

Speaker 1 (01:04:31):
Fine, you bet you better be careful crying better, you
better be careful crying man. People might think you gay.
You don't want to cry, And I got this shirt
on careful.

Speaker 2 (01:04:41):
Exactly right, No, likely be careful like that. This bond
between two black men around very real things, very real things.
So nothing but love for you, Jason. I always live
for these moments, between us, they don't stop for the
listeners because we leave voice members for each other all

(01:05:03):
the time. So we have this this is this is
just we live. That's all.

Speaker 1 (01:05:08):
This all they long, and I have to share it
publicly because you put the pebble in the pond and
now it has to happen. Louis gave the idea that
many of you already thought that this show needs to
be live, and whenever I do hosts, y'all hear it now,
and it's official. Okay, y'all hear it now. When I

(01:05:32):
do host my first live, Louis will be the guests. Okay, No,
that is coming because Lewis started this shit. Okay, mine
of my own damn business, learning how to be a podcaster,
and Louis bust me out side of here with a
honey bun and gave me the idea. And I'm running
with it because it makes sense. It just makes sense.

(01:05:53):
So to all of you listening, know it's coming when
we're how why the ain't none of my damn business.
What I do know is it's going to happen, So
be prepared. Start saving your pennies now because it ain't
gonna be where you at. Oh maybe it is. I
don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:06:09):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (01:06:10):
I didn't see this show where you know, Taraji be
Hitting was in Bali, one of her favorite places on CNN.
I don't know where we're gonna be. I ain't never been,
but seeing that show, I'm like, I might want to
be there. And then and then Gary Porter was there
in Greece and he did the photo shoot with the
red dress. I'm like, okay, Gary, Nail's painted and everything,

(01:06:31):
and I'm just like, this is human, this is us.
And this man just shout out, shout out, shout out, big,
shout out, whenever you want to show. I want your
own whenever you ready. So he's on here being his
authentic self so much so again can't get castle, and
CNN wants to highlight where he loves to be himself at,
which was in Greece. It's beautiful. It was beautiful. That's masculinity.

(01:06:57):
It's whatever I say it is. Now take picture, let's
go all right. Final thoughts, man, final thoughts, anything else.

Speaker 2 (01:07:06):
I just want to say to all the listeners that
you get to choose every day whether you will welcome
someone in or not, and the key is finding those
people who you can welcome in and they'll just wait

(01:07:26):
to hear. What are the next steps? Can I get
this strength of water? Can I put my feet up
on the table. Those are the people you want in
her life, who ask the mission and just love you.

Speaker 1 (01:07:40):
Mhmm, I love It sounds like you're talking about us.
And if I'm sorry if I misquoted, I mentioned Billy Porter.
I hope I didn't say Greg Reporter meant Billy Porter.
Oh yeah, yeah, okay.

Speaker 2 (01:07:54):
I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (01:07:56):
It's a difference. It makes a different, but exactly, And.

Speaker 2 (01:07:58):
When he's on the podcas it's like there it is.

Speaker 1 (01:08:02):
So I met Billy Porter and I'm welcoming Billy Porter
and Greg Reporter on the show. If y'all got access,
let him know, come through, come through now? Can you
imagine Greg Reporter with that damn head man hang out
on with a red dress, come on now? And Grease
can't see? I mean could?

Speaker 2 (01:08:16):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (01:08:19):
This has been another episode of the Three Palels podcast. We's
a host d Doctor Jason Brench, where we rediscover who
we were, we embrace who we are, and we make
room for who we're trying to become. If this show
had blessed you in any way, shape, form a fashion.
Do not leave it here, Give it away, share like, subscribe, comment,
give it to a friend, give it to a hater,

(01:08:40):
give it to whom ever. Just give it much love,
Take care of you. Three we out peo

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I'm Not Coming Out. I'm Welcoming People In | with Lewis Johnson

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}I'm Not Coming Out. I'm Welcoming People In | with Lewis Johnson