March 3, 2025 • 33 mins
In this episode of Abilities Zone, host Paul Amadeus Lane sits down with the remarkable Shane Burcaw. Known for his wit, honesty, and advocacy, Shane discusses his journey, his marriage to Hannah, and the importance of representation. Plus, get an exclusive preview of their appearance at the Abilities Expo Los Angeles, where they'll be connecting with the disability community. Tune in for a powerful and uplifting conversation.
Don't miss out on the Expo – register today at abilities.com! #AbilitiesExpo #ShaneBurcaw #DisabilityAdvocacy #AbilitiesZone #PaulAmadeusLane"
Don't miss out on the Expo – register today at abilities.com! #AbilitiesExpo #ShaneBurcaw #DisabilityAdvocacy #AbilitiesZone #PaulAmadeusLane"
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Shane, be careful what you wish for with questions, because
you know the one question everybody want to know about me.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
You don't wait for no wants.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
It ain't no copping when I'm reaching for the top,
and I know looking back, I'm only looking forward my goals,
and my goals don't fine.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
Who you know? And I'm fine, I'll be fine. I
just want you to know, Hello, and welcome to the
Ability Zone. What is up? It is me, Paul Amada
is Lane and I am so delighted to have you
on this episode. We're going to be joined by the
man himself, Shane Burkhou you know from Squarey and Grubbs.
(00:40):
He's going to be joining me to talk about the
Abilities Expo or what he and his wife Hannah are
going to be doing. They're going to be there for
two days. You gotta stay tuned. So if you want
to know what all is happening at the Abilities Expo
March seventh to the ninth at the Los Angeles Convention
Center in the West Hall, go to our website abilities
(01:03):
dot com. Go there and check out all the different workshops,
all the different events that are happening, and you will
not be disappointed. But here's the most important thing we
want you to do. Hear me and hear me well
or register. Register, Register, Register Now on the screen you
(01:26):
see a QR code right there. Now. If you can
do both, scan that QR code and register, we want
you there, So please do that. You are in for
a fantabolist time. Yes you are, Yes you are. See
what I like about the disabled community that I'm a
part of being a quadriplegic for over thirty two years,
(01:47):
is that y'all not like us. They not like us.
Some are not like us because we are just amazing people.
I'm not saying that other people out there who are
not disabled or not amazing, but we some amazing folks.
You know why because we deal with the same problems
(02:08):
that others deal with who have no disability. Compound that
with now having a disability. So that's what really makes
us awesome. And I'm gonna always shout our praises because
we are so Are you ready? Are you ready for
the main event? Are you ready to hear the story
(02:29):
of Shane Bracaal? Are you ready to hear some of
the things that they're going to be doing at the
Abilities Expo in Los Angeles, March seventh through the ninth.
You all ready, all right, let's do it. What's going on, Shane?
How are you? Hey?
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Ifom did, thanks for having.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
Me, Shane. I am delighted to have you. I've been
a big fan of yours for years. You know, as
a person with a disability myself, you know, I always
gravitate towards ones who are hustling like me and making
things happen. So it is so great to chat with you.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
Yeah. Absolutely, I'm excited.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
Well, Shane, you are going to be at the Abilities
Expo coming up here in Los Angeles and March. You
and your wife Hannah are going to be there, So
we're going to talk about all the things you're going
to share with us in that event. But what we're
going to do is for one who may not have
seen your story know who you are. Shane, please introduce
(03:24):
yourself to the world, my friend who don't know you. Wow.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Yeah, thank you. So. I'm Shane. I'm thirty two years
old and I have lived with a neuro muscular disability
called final muscular atrophy for my entire life. I am
an author of several books about living with a disability.
(03:50):
I'm kind of the fundy and ridiculous and sometimes frustrating
parts of living at the disability. I'm also now a
YouTuber alongside my wife Hannah. We've been making YouTube videos
about our interabled relationship for almost seven years now, so
(04:17):
we are full upon YouTubers and in all of the
work that I do and the works that I do
with Hannah, my goal is to improve the way that
society understands disability. I think anyone that has lived with
(04:37):
a disability understands on a very personal level how much
misinformation and ignorance there is out there in the world
about disability. And so a long time ago, as I
was kind of setting out on a path for my life,
(04:58):
I decided that I was gonna do everything I told
to use my story to help change that and give
people experience and knowledge so that we can all be
better to the disability to be. So that's me in
a nutshell. I live in Los Angeles and I have
(05:21):
a loudbridusial named lollly Nice.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
I love it, Shane, you know, And one of the
things that I really, you know, admire about you because
being disabled, you know, you know, I'm from the hood.
We used to say, game recognizes game, right, So I
mean we give props to those who are doing things
and doing it well. So I really appreciated, Shane how
you didn't allow the disability to stop you from doing
(05:47):
some pretty amazing things. I mean, you went to went
to college. You know, you graduated from college. And Shane,
what was that like? When did you know that? Hey,
you know, I'm going to do some great things and
I'm going to put my mind to it and do it.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah, I first have to acknowledge that I certainly I'm
from a place of privilege. You know, I have been
surrounded by a phenomenal support network and family throughout my life.
I give a lot of credit to my mom and
(06:23):
dad and the way that they raised me with my disability.
You know, I got my first wheel chair, a power
real chair, when I was two and a half three
years old, so like a baby, and my parents made
a decision that my disability was not going to be
(06:46):
a barrier to a happy life, and they encouraged me
to live like any other non disabled kid. You know,
I have a younger brother, Andrew, who's three years younger
than me, and it's not disabled. And as kids, Andrew
and I live their lives the same way. You know,
(07:08):
we go out in the neighborhood and make friends and
get in trouble and get dirty and get hurt. And
my parents just did a really good job of encouraging
me not to limit myself. They said, you know, your
life is going to be different. You're going to have
to do things differently at times. But that doesn't need
(07:31):
to be a bad thing. It means you need to
be creative and you need to learn how to communicate
with others. So I really I appreciate the way that
my parents brought me up. I think though I didn't
have a very good relationship with my disability until a
(07:57):
few years in the college. I heard all of the
messages from our society that, you know, all the portrayals
of disability in the media, that said that disability was
a burden, that it was a tragedy, that it's the
(08:19):
worst thing that can happen to a human And at
times in my earlier life I began to believe those things.
I began to believe that I didn't have value as
a romantic partner or as a you know, a worthy
(08:40):
member of society. And I worried, and I didn't know
what my future would be elected because of that. In college,
as I was writing a blog about my life that
kind of blew up and got a lot of attention
in the world. I had the opportunity of medium so
(09:04):
many other badass disabled people who were out there in
the world living their lives and just like killing every day.
And that was really my introduction to the idea that
disability is something that I can be proud of, that
(09:27):
I am part of this vibrant community of amazing individuals
who don't view themselves as trgedies or that they are
less than anyone else. And that was a big turning
(09:47):
in front for me. But you know, it was almost
like a switch went off in my head where I
was like, I don't need to be upset about, you know,
the differences in my life to embrace them and make
your medicine. And I think that was where kind of
the mission as my life began.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
I definitely hear you on that I became disabled over
thirty do my math in my head. When you get
old like me, Shane, you got to you gotta pause
from it and do the math in your head. But
it's been that thirty two years for me probably you know,
longer than you've been alive, Shane. At the same time,
and you know, I had to come to grips with
(10:31):
what my past normal was, what my normal was, and
to hear those same type of things in my head like,
well I'll be able to get into a relationship, you know,
will someone want to be with me? All these different things?
What can I do now? And it was like a
light went off in my head. I was like, you
know what, I've always been hardheaded my entire life. Why
(10:54):
stop now? So let me go ahead and try to
do some things and make things better. And when I
see ones like yourself, Shane, who are just putting, you know,
the pedal to the metal and just making it happen,
it just shows, man, we got some great, great leaders
in our community that can really help people to see like, hey,
(11:14):
we can make a difference, so we can do a
lot of great things together.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
Absolutely, I appreciate that something much. Yet I something interesting
about disability is something interesting that you just said is
learning to accept a new normal. I think that disability
is really good at helping humans learn to set new normals,
because you know, I've been disabled in my whole life,
(11:39):
but My disease is progressive, so over time my ability
is change, and you know, I've lost the abilities over
the years, and it's it's a never ending journey of
like learning to accept new normals. And I think that
that really breeds a lot of create activity, creativity, and innovation.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
Yeah, like you said, it hates a certain level of
already I did this. You know what this This might
not be the easiest path in the ruck and a
lot of the world was not made for me and
people like me, but I'm going to make it work,
and I'm going to give it I can to make
(12:25):
a difference.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
So true, Shane and Shane. You know, when you talk
to neuro ones who maybe who have recently became disabled
or one who are born disabled and they're they're feeling
like they just don't have a place or how they
can how they can fit into just society, what type
(12:47):
of advice you know, do you give them just to
help them to see that you know, you're going to
have these these highs and lows in life, but don't
let the lows take you out.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
That's a great Trussian. I think something that's really useful
for me is it sounds really simple but it's acknowledging
that life is just a series of eyes and lows
that no one gives to your life always on the highest,
you know, disability or not, and that's okay. I did's
(13:25):
okay to have low gays or low weeps or low months.
Another thing that really helps me is reminding myself that
the messages are craye better, media and society are not real.
Again drowning up, I didn't think that I had value
(13:47):
as a romantic partner, and that led me to not
pursuing any kind of romantic relationship. I would probably still
be single if I never kind have made myself try
like get myself out there. And yeah there was failure
(14:10):
involved in that, right, But reminding myself that, you know,
what society says about me is not the absolute truth.
It is a very helpful thing to view. And again
it's not always easy. Like I it's so much easier
(14:30):
to sit here and say, oh yeah, just remind yourself
that those hard emotions don't aren't real, but like they're
hard in their overwhelming at times. So maybe just know that,
like you're not alone, that so many disabled people have
(14:50):
gone through what you're feeling and downing through it or
are actively getting through it day by day. There's no
like right way to suddenly I feel like you like
she's perfect. It's a lifelong journey. So yeah, I think
(15:12):
that's what that means.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
Shane, I was thinking of a I was saying, Obi
Wan Kenobi said, and I think it was the either
revenge of the Sith or Yeah, when he said, only
a sith believes an absolute, So you know, there's no
there's no absolute when it comes to our disability. And
huh and Shane, you know, when you put yourself out there,
(15:36):
you met an amazing person who loved you for you.
And when Hannah first kind of you know, interacted with
you and you guys first start start start talking in
the back of your mind, did you think it was real?
Or did you think, like, is this girl trying to
(15:57):
play with me? Or she really she really loving me?
Speaker 2 (16:00):
Yeah, it's a your impestion. I think whenever you meet
someone as incredible as Hannah is, like, there's just a
million different ways that she's the most perfect human being
I've ever met. And so I think anyone who Hannah
(16:21):
is showing, you know, interested in romantically would probably have
moments in the beginning where they're like, is this real?
Speaker 1 (16:29):
Am?
Speaker 2 (16:29):
I am? I being pranced But there was a such
a real connection between her and I from the beginning that,
like you know, I was very easily able to put
aside those initial worries that you have when you get
(16:50):
into a relationship. I had dated a few of them
in prior to meeting Hannah, and obviously those relationships didn't
work out, but they taught me a lot. They taught
me that a I am, a worthy romantic partner is
capable of providing in a relationship, and it helped me
(17:15):
a lot when I did meet and to have confidence
in myself that you know, I was worthy of her.
And I think that confidence is a really difficult thing
to achieve, but it can only happen, Like I said before,
if you begin putting yourself out there, don't through the
(17:36):
hives on my ows and learning from them.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Yeah, that's true. And and Shane, it kind of reminds
me like when I first got injured over thirty two
years ago, there was a shift that was happening and
entabled relationships. I know that we have hospital I was
in ranchall Los of Eagles here in Los Angeles from
a lot of my bedfellows who I was in that
(18:00):
rehab award with, they lost a lot of their their wives,
their girlfriends, and and they were just alone. But then
like a like a year later, you know, and that
had me thinking, like, wow, is this gonna happen to me?
I started to see a shift where as long as
we talked, we communicated, we connected with the person on
(18:25):
an in intellectual level, that you can have a person
fall in love with you despite your your disability, and
and and I tell this story all the time. I
had more women attracted to me in my wheelchair than
I did when I was up and around because when
I was up and around, I relied on my looks,
(18:47):
I relied on my on my skills that I had.
But then when I got injured, I had to just
rely on my on my brain and my mouth and
just you know, connect with the person, make a person
feel good. And it kind of blew my mind, Shane.
And then to see where we're at today three decades later,
I mean, I look at our community and I sit
(19:09):
back and I'm like, we have come a long way
with this. And it's ones like yourself, ones like Colon
Charisma and others out there, you know, have shown people, Yeah,
you can get in a relationship with those serious disabled
I don't like for me. I've been been married to
be twenty nine years this year. My wife and I
(19:33):
we've been together for thirty thirty since ninety one, so
we were together before my accident. And she, Yeah, they
don't care what you are who you are, and that's
a beautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
Shane absolutely. Yeah, something that we talk about in our
USUBE videos all the time. People that do not have
experience with disability. I have all these assumptions that you know, dada,
a person with the disability, or being in a relationship
with them must be like NonStop terry giving or like
(20:09):
you know, sad or well only, and it's none of
those things. When we set out to write our book Interabled,
in which we were interviewing a bunch of other interabled couples,
I was, I'm sure about how easy it would be
(20:31):
to find other couples to interview. You know, there's just
not many examples in our media of people in relationships,
I guess. But we put up a submission form online
pasking the world for an even that was interested, you know,
(20:52):
people in interabled relationships to be interviewed for our book
and in less than Funny for ours we had over
six hundred submissions from couples all over the United States,
and it was just this like beautiful eye opening moment.
But oh, I'm not special, you know, I'm not rare.
(21:17):
And it's it's a good feeling too, not feel rare.
And the process of meeting and interviewing so many of
these couples was again like amazing to see that there
were so many people out there who live lives like
to be do and are happy and thriving. And I
(21:40):
hope that when the world reads their book they stop.
Wasn't it you know, be in Hannah, I was like
this rare like once in a blue moon type sale
and realize that we're out here and you know, we're
we're living our lives.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
Yeah, it's a it's a it's a lot of us
out there, and we we tell our stories and we
let people know, you know, we we have fun a
couple as couples, We go on vacation, se we do
all these all these amazing things and and Shane, it's
a it's it's really great, you know when we're able
to touch people's lives and let them know that, hey,
(22:19):
this is possible, it can be done. But also tell
people too, you know, just because just because we're married
don't mean be perfect. You know, we fuss, you know,
we get into it. You know, I'm i'm, I go
to my man cave. She she gets up at five
o'clock in the morning where she has her own time
to herself. So we you know, it's a real marriage,
you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (22:38):
Absolutely absolutely, yeah, like like genuine marriage. You have your disagreements,
you have your difficult films. But if it's a strong relationship,
rid ship sounds like yours obviously is you figure it
out and you get through it.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
That is so true. And Shane, I want to spend
a little, just a few minutes talking about, you know,
some of your content that you put on on on Instagram.
You know you you cracked me up, Shane. You know,
I think of myself as being a funny guy, but
I ain't got nothing on you, Shane. I mean some
of the things you come up with. Man, this one, uh,
(23:11):
I think as you post you did when you're kind
of like interviewing yourself like two different personalities. I was like, man,
this is so funny, so I try to mimic it
myself and Shane, I couldn't do it, man. So I
mean that, you know what, what do you come up
with these different ideas to have something entertaining but also
educational as well.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Thank you. I appreciate that part of it is coming
up with a lot of bad ideas that end up
not being that good or funny and you know, amazing content,
and then realizing, you know what, I'm not going to
pass this this, this isn't my best worse for me.
(23:53):
I mean, humor has always been a huge part of
my family dynamic, and I think that that's where I
got my sense of humor from when we when I
was little and growing up, whenever anyone had either a
problem or a challenge, or they were upset or whatever,
(24:15):
our family's way of handling that was to make fun
of the situation so that the person who's feeling upset
or whatever is able to relax and lefe and just
light in the mood a bit. I've always felt that
(24:36):
humor is the best way to make difficult topics more approachable.
So if in my dole, you know, making the world
more educated and array about disability, if part of that
process is talking to them about I'm making this up,
(25:02):
but how people with disabilities might use the bathroom and
why accessible bathrooms are important. That would very easily be
a topic that might turn people away and they might
say that's weird. I don't want to hear about that.
I don't want to know how you use the bathroom,
(25:22):
thank you. But if I could make it funny and
tell a funny story, make them laugh and at the
same time make them more aware about accessible bathrooms, whatever,
and then I've done my job. So yeah, I think
you know, being funny helps me reach people and give
(25:44):
them a little bit of medicine with a lot of sugar.
Speaker 1 (25:49):
So yeah, yeah, we really appreciate you your content and
love how honest and open that you and Hannah are
on social media. Uh, you know, the interview with Hannah's
mom was amazing and all the other things in your family.
And it's great to have you out here in the
West Coast. Now man, now, now you and I, you
and I we can hang out now man it out
(26:12):
of the desert, definitely, lest side. That's how we do it.
So so Shane, you and Hanna are going to be
at the Abilities Expo, and you guys are going to
be a part of two amazing events, and I have
the honor and the privilege of introducing you both at
both little events you're going to be at at the Expo.
So why don't you tell our viewers and our listeners
out there, but you and Hannah are going to be
doing at the Abilities Expo.
Speaker 2 (26:33):
Yeah, absolutely, we're so so. I think this will be
our first Abilities out spell that we're ever performing at,
but we love Abilities up spell events. We've been to
a few now and we'll be giving to presentations. One
is more formal. I hate to use the word formal
(26:54):
because it's a very funny presentation. You're gonna be laughing
the whole time. Hopefully, if we do our job right,
I may be familiar with our life and our works,
and we want to invite you to come on out
and ask just anything that you want, from you know,
our favorite food to why we do the advocacy that
(27:16):
we do. So nothing will be off limits, and we
think it will be a fun time to, you know,
get to know some more of our audience. And that
presentation is about debunking some of the stigmas that surround disability.
(27:36):
And relationships. So and I will be using some ridiculous
stories from our own relationship to identify and break down
some of these kind of nefarious ideas that are out
there in the world to help the audience feel more
(27:56):
comfortable and empowered about, you know, maybe being in a
relationship with a disability or with someone that has a disability.
And then on day two we'll be giving you just said,
real away that casual audience to an a So you know,
(28:17):
we know that many of you may have seen our
videos online.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
Awesome, and I know we're all looking forward to it.
I remember last year when you showed up, you went
through the floor and everything. I was trying to make
my way to you, but by the time I got
around you guys already jetted. But now I'm glad, Well, we'll.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
Be up this time for sure.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
Absolutely. Yeah. We get a chance to hang out and
chat and everything. That's really gonna be awesome. Shane, be
careful what you wish for with questions, because you know,
the one question everybody want to know about me and
you being husbands, And you know what, you know what
I tell them, Shane, I tell them this. I tell
them the Death Star is still operational. That's what I
(29:01):
always tell them, so they can quit ask me those
darn questions.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
That's a great answer. I need to steal that one.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
Hey, hey, anything my friend it is George. You could
definitely use that. But but Shane, it was so great
chatting with you, and anything else you'd like to share
with us. Maybe how once can get in contact with you?
Follow your content? The floor is yours, my friend.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Yeah, thank you very much. I already encourage everyone if
you're interested. Our newest but interabled has just been released
last month or earlier this month. Wow, and so that
is available wherever books are sold. We encourage you to
chet that out. Please, if you're in the LA or
(29:41):
Sotal area, come on out to the Abilities a Spell
March seventy eighth, I think, come on out, say hi
and yeah, I really appreciate you, Paul for having me
on and talking talking disability and advocacy.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
Hey, Shane, and it's been an honored and privilege. Man.
We've been following you for a while and some of
the things that you and your amazing wife Hannah does
is really awesome, you know. And and that's one thing
that you and I have in common. We have some
pretty amazing wives who take care of us, who allow
us to do what we do and make it easier
(30:19):
for us to, you know, to be out and do
some things. Man. So so it's really really awesome to
get a chance to chat with you. That was Shane Bricall.
Really enjoyed chatting with him and finding about more about
his story and just what he's been doing out there
and how he's really a leader when it comes to
(30:41):
the disabled community out there. And I tell you, I've
been in this game for three decades and it is
great to see the newer generation come and just take
the bull by the horns and just doing the thing.
So I really appreciate him and hearing about his lovely
wife Hannah and their relationship. And you'll get a chair
to see them in person at the Abilities x FO
(31:03):
March seventh through the ninth. Now, they're going to be
there that Friday and also that Saturday. If you go
to our website abilities dot Com, you'll be able to
check out the whole entire schedule and don't forget you
also can register register early register now to make it
easier for you instead of dealing with, you know, all
(31:24):
the la madness when you get there. Oh, parking now,
if you're driving, parking is twenty seven dollars now, it
used to be twenty five dollars. But can you believe
the city of Los Angeles that has the LA Rams,
the LA Lakers, the LA Charges, and the I guess
(31:49):
the Angleway Clippers now that are still the LA Clippers,
but all that tax revenue coming in there, and they
got the nerve and go up two dollars on parking
and make it twenty seven dollars. I mean, come on, y'all,
I mean really, I'm sorry. Let me get off my soapbox,
but that just really bothered me when I found that out.
(32:10):
But just be prepared. Twenty seven dollars. Now, if you
can maybe take some alternative transportation there, it may be
easier for you. But whatever it is, we want you there.
So many great things we're gonna have there at the
Abilities expl I'm gonna be there, I'm gonna be em
seeing this time. Can you believe that at the at
the event center, i'ma be doing the thing. I'ma be
(32:32):
having fun and dancing, playing some music and introducing our
great guest like Shane and Hannah and others Justin's going
to be there. Justin Graham, Wow, he and not gonna
be dancing together. Other one's gonna be there. So go
to our website and see what's in store for you. Well,
(32:52):
it's time for me to get out of here, but
before I go, give me a favor. Stay healthy, stay safe,
and remember I love you all the life. Take care everyone.
Speaker 3 (33:06):
Oh I'm a dad.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
Yeah, you don't wait for no one.
Speaker 3 (33:09):
It ain't no topping where I'm reaching for the top.
And I know looking back, I'm only looking forward my goals,
and my goals don't s'p.
Speaker 1 (33:16):
Fine who you know? And I'm fine, I'll be fine.
I just want you to know.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
H
Shane, be careful what you wish for with questions, because
you know the one question everybody want to know about me.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
You don't wait for no wants.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
It ain't no copping when I'm reaching for the top,
and I know looking back, I'm only looking forward my goals,
and my goals don't fine.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
Who you know? And I'm fine, I'll be fine. I
just want you to know, Hello, and welcome to the
Ability Zone. What is up? It is me, Paul Amada
is Lane and I am so delighted to have you
on this episode. We're going to be joined by the
man himself, Shane Burkhou you know from Squarey and Grubbs.
(00:40):
He's going to be joining me to talk about the
Abilities Expo or what he and his wife Hannah are
going to be doing. They're going to be there for
two days. You gotta stay tuned. So if you want
to know what all is happening at the Abilities Expo
March seventh to the ninth at the Los Angeles Convention
Center in the West Hall, go to our website abilities
(01:03):
dot com. Go there and check out all the different workshops,
all the different events that are happening, and you will
not be disappointed. But here's the most important thing we
want you to do. Hear me and hear me well
or register. Register, Register, Register Now on the screen you
(01:26):
see a QR code right there. Now. If you can
do both, scan that QR code and register, we want
you there, So please do that. You are in for
a fantabolist time. Yes you are, Yes you are. See
what I like about the disabled community that I'm a
part of being a quadriplegic for over thirty two years,
(01:47):
is that y'all not like us. They not like us.
Some are not like us because we are just amazing people.
I'm not saying that other people out there who are
not disabled or not amazing, but we some amazing folks.
You know why because we deal with the same problems
(02:08):
that others deal with who have no disability. Compound that
with now having a disability. So that's what really makes
us awesome. And I'm gonna always shout our praises because
we are so Are you ready? Are you ready for
the main event? Are you ready to hear the story
(02:29):
of Shane Bracaal? Are you ready to hear some of
the things that they're going to be doing at the
Abilities Expo in Los Angeles, March seventh through the ninth.
You all ready, all right, let's do it. What's going on, Shane?
How are you? Hey?
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Ifom did, thanks for having.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
Me, Shane. I am delighted to have you. I've been
a big fan of yours for years. You know, as
a person with a disability myself, you know, I always
gravitate towards ones who are hustling like me and making
things happen. So it is so great to chat with you.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
Yeah. Absolutely, I'm excited.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
Well, Shane, you are going to be at the Abilities
Expo coming up here in Los Angeles and March. You
and your wife Hannah are going to be there, So
we're going to talk about all the things you're going
to share with us in that event. But what we're
going to do is for one who may not have
seen your story know who you are. Shane, please introduce
(03:24):
yourself to the world, my friend who don't know you. Wow.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Yeah, thank you. So. I'm Shane. I'm thirty two years
old and I have lived with a neuro muscular disability
called final muscular atrophy for my entire life. I am
an author of several books about living with a disability.
(03:50):
I'm kind of the fundy and ridiculous and sometimes frustrating
parts of living at the disability. I'm also now a
YouTuber alongside my wife Hannah. We've been making YouTube videos
about our interabled relationship for almost seven years now, so
(04:17):
we are full upon YouTubers and in all of the
work that I do and the works that I do
with Hannah, my goal is to improve the way that
society understands disability. I think anyone that has lived with
(04:37):
a disability understands on a very personal level how much
misinformation and ignorance there is out there in the world
about disability. And so a long time ago, as I
was kind of setting out on a path for my life,
(04:58):
I decided that I was gonna do everything I told
to use my story to help change that and give
people experience and knowledge so that we can all be
better to the disability to be. So that's me in
a nutshell. I live in Los Angeles and I have
(05:21):
a loudbridusial named lollly Nice.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
I love it, Shane, you know, And one of the
things that I really, you know, admire about you because
being disabled, you know, you know, I'm from the hood.
We used to say, game recognizes game, right, So I
mean we give props to those who are doing things
and doing it well. So I really appreciated, Shane how
you didn't allow the disability to stop you from doing
(05:47):
some pretty amazing things. I mean, you went to went
to college. You know, you graduated from college. And Shane,
what was that like? When did you know that? Hey,
you know, I'm going to do some great things and
I'm going to put my mind to it and do it.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah, I first have to acknowledge that I certainly I'm
from a place of privilege. You know, I have been
surrounded by a phenomenal support network and family throughout my life.
I give a lot of credit to my mom and
(06:23):
dad and the way that they raised me with my disability.
You know, I got my first wheel chair, a power
real chair, when I was two and a half three
years old, so like a baby, and my parents made
a decision that my disability was not going to be
(06:46):
a barrier to a happy life, and they encouraged me
to live like any other non disabled kid. You know,
I have a younger brother, Andrew, who's three years younger
than me, and it's not disabled. And as kids, Andrew
and I live their lives the same way. You know,
(07:08):
we go out in the neighborhood and make friends and
get in trouble and get dirty and get hurt. And
my parents just did a really good job of encouraging
me not to limit myself. They said, you know, your
life is going to be different. You're going to have
to do things differently at times. But that doesn't need
(07:31):
to be a bad thing. It means you need to
be creative and you need to learn how to communicate
with others. So I really I appreciate the way that
my parents brought me up. I think though I didn't
have a very good relationship with my disability until a
(07:57):
few years in the college. I heard all of the
messages from our society that, you know, all the portrayals
of disability in the media, that said that disability was
a burden, that it was a tragedy, that it's the
(08:19):
worst thing that can happen to a human And at
times in my earlier life I began to believe those things.
I began to believe that I didn't have value as
a romantic partner or as a you know, a worthy
(08:40):
member of society. And I worried, and I didn't know
what my future would be elected because of that. In college,
as I was writing a blog about my life that
kind of blew up and got a lot of attention
in the world. I had the opportunity of medium so
(09:04):
many other badass disabled people who were out there in
the world living their lives and just like killing every day.
And that was really my introduction to the idea that
disability is something that I can be proud of, that
(09:27):
I am part of this vibrant community of amazing individuals
who don't view themselves as trgedies or that they are
less than anyone else. And that was a big turning
(09:47):
in front for me. But you know, it was almost
like a switch went off in my head where I
was like, I don't need to be upset about, you know,
the differences in my life to embrace them and make
your medicine. And I think that was where kind of
the mission as my life began.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
I definitely hear you on that I became disabled over
thirty do my math in my head. When you get
old like me, Shane, you got to you gotta pause
from it and do the math in your head. But
it's been that thirty two years for me probably you know,
longer than you've been alive, Shane. At the same time,
and you know, I had to come to grips with
(10:31):
what my past normal was, what my normal was, and
to hear those same type of things in my head like,
well I'll be able to get into a relationship, you know,
will someone want to be with me? All these different things?
What can I do now? And it was like a
light went off in my head. I was like, you
know what, I've always been hardheaded my entire life. Why
(10:54):
stop now? So let me go ahead and try to
do some things and make things better. And when I
see ones like yourself, Shane, who are just putting, you know,
the pedal to the metal and just making it happen,
it just shows, man, we got some great, great leaders
in our community that can really help people to see like, hey,
(11:14):
we can make a difference, so we can do a
lot of great things together.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
Absolutely, I appreciate that something much. Yet I something interesting
about disability is something interesting that you just said is
learning to accept a new normal. I think that disability
is really good at helping humans learn to set new normals,
because you know, I've been disabled in my whole life,
(11:39):
but My disease is progressive, so over time my ability
is change, and you know, I've lost the abilities over
the years, and it's it's a never ending journey of
like learning to accept new normals. And I think that
that really breeds a lot of create activity, creativity, and innovation.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
Yeah, like you said, it hates a certain level of
already I did this. You know what this This might
not be the easiest path in the ruck and a
lot of the world was not made for me and
people like me, but I'm going to make it work,
and I'm going to give it I can to make
(12:25):
a difference.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
So true, Shane and Shane. You know, when you talk
to neuro ones who maybe who have recently became disabled
or one who are born disabled and they're they're feeling
like they just don't have a place or how they
can how they can fit into just society, what type
(12:47):
of advice you know, do you give them just to
help them to see that you know, you're going to
have these these highs and lows in life, but don't
let the lows take you out.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
That's a great Trussian. I think something that's really useful
for me is it sounds really simple but it's acknowledging
that life is just a series of eyes and lows
that no one gives to your life always on the highest,
you know, disability or not, and that's okay. I did's
(13:25):
okay to have low gays or low weeps or low months.
Another thing that really helps me is reminding myself that
the messages are craye better, media and society are not real.
Again drowning up, I didn't think that I had value
(13:47):
as a romantic partner, and that led me to not
pursuing any kind of romantic relationship. I would probably still
be single if I never kind have made myself try
like get myself out there. And yeah there was failure
(14:10):
involved in that, right, But reminding myself that, you know,
what society says about me is not the absolute truth.
It is a very helpful thing to view. And again
it's not always easy. Like I it's so much easier
(14:30):
to sit here and say, oh yeah, just remind yourself
that those hard emotions don't aren't real, but like they're
hard in their overwhelming at times. So maybe just know that,
like you're not alone, that so many disabled people have
(14:50):
gone through what you're feeling and downing through it or
are actively getting through it day by day. There's no
like right way to suddenly I feel like you like
she's perfect. It's a lifelong journey. So yeah, I think
(15:12):
that's what that means.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
Shane, I was thinking of a I was saying, Obi
Wan Kenobi said, and I think it was the either
revenge of the Sith or Yeah, when he said, only
a sith believes an absolute, So you know, there's no
there's no absolute when it comes to our disability. And
huh and Shane, you know, when you put yourself out there,
(15:36):
you met an amazing person who loved you for you.
And when Hannah first kind of you know, interacted with
you and you guys first start start start talking in
the back of your mind, did you think it was real?
Or did you think, like, is this girl trying to
(15:57):
play with me? Or she really she really loving me?
Speaker 2 (16:00):
Yeah, it's a your impestion. I think whenever you meet
someone as incredible as Hannah is, like, there's just a
million different ways that she's the most perfect human being
I've ever met. And so I think anyone who Hannah
(16:21):
is showing, you know, interested in romantically would probably have
moments in the beginning where they're like, is this real?
Speaker 1 (16:29):
Am?
Speaker 2 (16:29):
I am? I being pranced But there was a such
a real connection between her and I from the beginning that,
like you know, I was very easily able to put
aside those initial worries that you have when you get
(16:50):
into a relationship. I had dated a few of them
in prior to meeting Hannah, and obviously those relationships didn't
work out, but they taught me a lot. They taught
me that a I am, a worthy romantic partner is
capable of providing in a relationship, and it helped me
(17:15):
a lot when I did meet and to have confidence
in myself that you know, I was worthy of her.
And I think that confidence is a really difficult thing
to achieve, but it can only happen, Like I said before,
if you begin putting yourself out there, don't through the
(17:36):
hives on my ows and learning from them.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Yeah, that's true. And and Shane, it kind of reminds
me like when I first got injured over thirty two
years ago, there was a shift that was happening and
entabled relationships. I know that we have hospital I was
in ranchall Los of Eagles here in Los Angeles from
a lot of my bedfellows who I was in that
(18:00):
rehab award with, they lost a lot of their their wives,
their girlfriends, and and they were just alone. But then
like a like a year later, you know, and that
had me thinking, like, wow, is this gonna happen to me?
I started to see a shift where as long as
we talked, we communicated, we connected with the person on
(18:25):
an in intellectual level, that you can have a person
fall in love with you despite your your disability, and
and and I tell this story all the time. I
had more women attracted to me in my wheelchair than
I did when I was up and around because when
I was up and around, I relied on my looks,
(18:47):
I relied on my on my skills that I had.
But then when I got injured, I had to just
rely on my on my brain and my mouth and
just you know, connect with the person, make a person
feel good. And it kind of blew my mind, Shane.
And then to see where we're at today three decades later,
I mean, I look at our community and I sit
(19:09):
back and I'm like, we have come a long way
with this. And it's ones like yourself, ones like Colon
Charisma and others out there, you know, have shown people, Yeah,
you can get in a relationship with those serious disabled
I don't like for me. I've been been married to
be twenty nine years this year. My wife and I
(19:33):
we've been together for thirty thirty since ninety one, so
we were together before my accident. And she, Yeah, they
don't care what you are who you are, and that's
a beautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
Shane absolutely. Yeah, something that we talk about in our
USUBE videos all the time. People that do not have
experience with disability. I have all these assumptions that you know, dada,
a person with the disability, or being in a relationship
with them must be like NonStop terry giving or like
(20:09):
you know, sad or well only, and it's none of
those things. When we set out to write our book Interabled,
in which we were interviewing a bunch of other interabled couples,
I was, I'm sure about how easy it would be
(20:31):
to find other couples to interview. You know, there's just
not many examples in our media of people in relationships,
I guess. But we put up a submission form online
pasking the world for an even that was interested, you know,
(20:52):
people in interabled relationships to be interviewed for our book
and in less than Funny for ours we had over
six hundred submissions from couples all over the United States,
and it was just this like beautiful eye opening moment.
But oh, I'm not special, you know, I'm not rare.
(21:17):
And it's it's a good feeling too, not feel rare.
And the process of meeting and interviewing so many of
these couples was again like amazing to see that there
were so many people out there who live lives like
to be do and are happy and thriving. And I
(21:40):
hope that when the world reads their book they stop.
Wasn't it you know, be in Hannah, I was like
this rare like once in a blue moon type sale
and realize that we're out here and you know, we're
we're living our lives.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
Yeah, it's a it's a it's a lot of us
out there, and we we tell our stories and we
let people know, you know, we we have fun a
couple as couples, We go on vacation, se we do
all these all these amazing things and and Shane, it's
a it's it's really great, you know when we're able
to touch people's lives and let them know that, hey,
(22:19):
this is possible, it can be done. But also tell
people too, you know, just because just because we're married
don't mean be perfect. You know, we fuss, you know,
we get into it. You know, I'm i'm, I go
to my man cave. She she gets up at five
o'clock in the morning where she has her own time
to herself. So we you know, it's a real marriage,
you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (22:38):
Absolutely absolutely, yeah, like like genuine marriage. You have your disagreements,
you have your difficult films. But if it's a strong relationship,
rid ship sounds like yours obviously is you figure it
out and you get through it.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
That is so true. And Shane, I want to spend
a little, just a few minutes talking about, you know,
some of your content that you put on on on Instagram.
You know you you cracked me up, Shane. You know,
I think of myself as being a funny guy, but
I ain't got nothing on you, Shane. I mean some
of the things you come up with. Man, this one, uh,
(23:11):
I think as you post you did when you're kind
of like interviewing yourself like two different personalities. I was like, man,
this is so funny, so I try to mimic it
myself and Shane, I couldn't do it, man. So I
mean that, you know what, what do you come up
with these different ideas to have something entertaining but also
educational as well.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Thank you. I appreciate that part of it is coming
up with a lot of bad ideas that end up
not being that good or funny and you know, amazing content,
and then realizing, you know what, I'm not going to
pass this this, this isn't my best worse for me.
(23:53):
I mean, humor has always been a huge part of
my family dynamic, and I think that that's where I
got my sense of humor from when we when I
was little and growing up, whenever anyone had either a
problem or a challenge, or they were upset or whatever,
(24:15):
our family's way of handling that was to make fun
of the situation so that the person who's feeling upset
or whatever is able to relax and lefe and just
light in the mood a bit. I've always felt that
(24:36):
humor is the best way to make difficult topics more approachable.
So if in my dole, you know, making the world
more educated and array about disability, if part of that
process is talking to them about I'm making this up,
(25:02):
but how people with disabilities might use the bathroom and
why accessible bathrooms are important. That would very easily be
a topic that might turn people away and they might
say that's weird. I don't want to hear about that.
I don't want to know how you use the bathroom,
(25:22):
thank you. But if I could make it funny and
tell a funny story, make them laugh and at the
same time make them more aware about accessible bathrooms, whatever,
and then I've done my job. So yeah, I think
you know, being funny helps me reach people and give
(25:44):
them a little bit of medicine with a lot of sugar.
Speaker 1 (25:49):
So yeah, yeah, we really appreciate you your content and
love how honest and open that you and Hannah are
on social media. Uh, you know, the interview with Hannah's
mom was amazing and all the other things in your family.
And it's great to have you out here in the
West Coast. Now man, now, now you and I, you
and I we can hang out now man it out
(26:12):
of the desert, definitely, lest side. That's how we do it.
So so Shane, you and Hanna are going to be
at the Abilities Expo, and you guys are going to
be a part of two amazing events, and I have
the honor and the privilege of introducing you both at
both little events you're going to be at at the Expo.
So why don't you tell our viewers and our listeners
out there, but you and Hannah are going to be
doing at the Abilities Expo.
Speaker 2 (26:33):
Yeah, absolutely, we're so so. I think this will be
our first Abilities out spell that we're ever performing at,
but we love Abilities up spell events. We've been to
a few now and we'll be giving to presentations. One
is more formal. I hate to use the word formal
(26:54):
because it's a very funny presentation. You're gonna be laughing
the whole time. Hopefully, if we do our job right,
I may be familiar with our life and our works,
and we want to invite you to come on out
and ask just anything that you want, from you know,
our favorite food to why we do the advocacy that
(27:16):
we do. So nothing will be off limits, and we
think it will be a fun time to, you know,
get to know some more of our audience. And that
presentation is about debunking some of the stigmas that surround disability.
(27:36):
And relationships. So and I will be using some ridiculous
stories from our own relationship to identify and break down
some of these kind of nefarious ideas that are out
there in the world to help the audience feel more
(27:56):
comfortable and empowered about, you know, maybe being in a
relationship with a disability or with someone that has a disability.
And then on day two we'll be giving you just said,
real away that casual audience to an a So you know,
(28:17):
we know that many of you may have seen our
videos online.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
Awesome, and I know we're all looking forward to it.
I remember last year when you showed up, you went
through the floor and everything. I was trying to make
my way to you, but by the time I got
around you guys already jetted. But now I'm glad, Well, we'll.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
Be up this time for sure.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
Absolutely. Yeah. We get a chance to hang out and
chat and everything. That's really gonna be awesome. Shane, be
careful what you wish for with questions, because you know,
the one question everybody want to know about me and
you being husbands, And you know what, you know what
I tell them, Shane, I tell them this. I tell
them the Death Star is still operational. That's what I
(29:01):
always tell them, so they can quit ask me those
darn questions.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
That's a great answer. I need to steal that one.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
Hey, hey, anything my friend it is George. You could
definitely use that. But but Shane, it was so great
chatting with you, and anything else you'd like to share
with us. Maybe how once can get in contact with you?
Follow your content? The floor is yours, my friend.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Yeah, thank you very much. I already encourage everyone if
you're interested. Our newest but interabled has just been released
last month or earlier this month. Wow, and so that
is available wherever books are sold. We encourage you to
chet that out. Please, if you're in the LA or
(29:41):
Sotal area, come on out to the Abilities a Spell
March seventy eighth, I think, come on out, say hi
and yeah, I really appreciate you, Paul for having me
on and talking talking disability and advocacy.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
Hey, Shane, and it's been an honored and privilege. Man.
We've been following you for a while and some of
the things that you and your amazing wife Hannah does
is really awesome, you know. And and that's one thing
that you and I have in common. We have some
pretty amazing wives who take care of us, who allow
us to do what we do and make it easier
(30:19):
for us to, you know, to be out and do
some things. Man. So so it's really really awesome to
get a chance to chat with you. That was Shane Bricall.
Really enjoyed chatting with him and finding about more about
his story and just what he's been doing out there
and how he's really a leader when it comes to
(30:41):
the disabled community out there. And I tell you, I've
been in this game for three decades and it is
great to see the newer generation come and just take
the bull by the horns and just doing the thing.
So I really appreciate him and hearing about his lovely
wife Hannah and their relationship. And you'll get a chair
to see them in person at the Abilities x FO
(31:03):
March seventh through the ninth. Now, they're going to be
there that Friday and also that Saturday. If you go
to our website abilities dot Com, you'll be able to
check out the whole entire schedule and don't forget you
also can register register early register now to make it
easier for you instead of dealing with, you know, all
(31:24):
the la madness when you get there. Oh, parking now,
if you're driving, parking is twenty seven dollars now, it
used to be twenty five dollars. But can you believe
the city of Los Angeles that has the LA Rams,
the LA Lakers, the LA Charges, and the I guess
(31:49):
the Angleway Clippers now that are still the LA Clippers,
but all that tax revenue coming in there, and they
got the nerve and go up two dollars on parking
and make it twenty seven dollars. I mean, come on, y'all,
I mean really, I'm sorry. Let me get off my soapbox,
but that just really bothered me when I found that out.
(32:10):
But just be prepared. Twenty seven dollars. Now, if you
can maybe take some alternative transportation there, it may be
easier for you. But whatever it is, we want you there.
So many great things we're gonna have there at the
Abilities expl I'm gonna be there, I'm gonna be em
seeing this time. Can you believe that at the at
the event center, i'ma be doing the thing. I'ma be
(32:32):
having fun and dancing, playing some music and introducing our
great guest like Shane and Hannah and others Justin's going
to be there. Justin Graham, Wow, he and not gonna
be dancing together. Other one's gonna be there. So go
to our website and see what's in store for you. Well,
(32:52):
it's time for me to get out of here, but
before I go, give me a favor. Stay healthy, stay safe,
and remember I love you all the life. Take care everyone.
Speaker 3 (33:06):
Oh I'm a dad.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
Yeah, you don't wait for no one.
Speaker 3 (33:09):
It ain't no topping where I'm reaching for the top.
And I know looking back, I'm only looking forward my goals,
and my goals don't s'p.
Speaker 1 (33:16):
Fine who you know? And I'm fine, I'll be fine.
I just want you to know.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
H
Popular Podcasts
NFL Daily with Gregg Rosenthal
Gregg Rosenthal and a rotating crew of elite NFL Media co-hosts, including Patrick Claybon, Colleen Wolfe, Steve Wyche, Nick Shook and Jourdan Rodrigue of The Athletic get you caught up daily on all the NFL news and analysis you need to be smarter and funnier than your friends.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com