June 17, 2025 • 22 mins
If your vision was a person, would it still want to be with you? In this episode, Bri Seeley challenges you to rethink how you relate to your goals. Because survival mode isn’t a strategy—and your dreams need more than pressure to grow. What you’ll learn in this episode:
- Why your goals might be avoiding you
- Signs of an unhealthy goal relationship
- How to shift from pressure to partnership
- Rituals, tools, and practices for rebuilding connection
- A sneak peek at July’s “Underworking + Overliving” challenge
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome back to Big Goal Energy. I'm your hostess, Breez Seely,
and I want to kick off today's episode by asking
you something a little bold. If your vision was a person,
would it still want to be in a relationship with you?
Would your goal feel nurtured, scene supported, excited by your
(00:21):
relationship or would it feel ignored? Would it feel micromanaged,
criticized or condoubted every step of the way. So many
ambitious women have these incredible visions, but we treat those
visions with pressure, anxiety, and mistrust and resentment. We obsessed,
(00:41):
we overwork, we ghost our dreams, and then we expect
them to prove themselves before we commit, and then we
wonder why the hell the relationship feels off? What's wrong
with it? Why do things not feel great? So in
this episode, I want to inc inspire you to evaluate
(01:02):
your current relationship and begin to explore and open up
to what does it look like to have a healthy
relationship with my goals and my vision, a relationship that's
rooted in trust, in reciprocity, in devotion, not just productivity
and pressure. Because your big goals are not going to
(01:23):
thrive in survival mode. Your big goals are going to
grow when you treat them like a sacred partner in
your life. If you are ready to reconnect to your
vision from a place of life giving energy. I have
something very exciting coming in July, and I'm going to
be sharing in this episode how you can join the movement,
(01:46):
the experiment, the challenge to pursue success with your life,
not in spite of it. So let's dive into today's episode.
I'm so excited to explore this concept of your relationship
and ship with your goal.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
You were never meant for a small life.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
You have bold ideas, audacious dreams, and visions that keep
you up at night. But the truth is big goals
don't come with step by step instruction, and success doesn't
come from doing more, It comes from becoming more. Welcome
to Big Goal Energy a podcast for high achieving women
who are done shrinking, striving, and second guessing and are
(02:26):
ready to defy reality in pursuit of the life they
actually want. I'm your hostess, free sealy, goal architect, subconscious strategist,
and your permission slip to want what you want. Join
me as we go beyond the service level success to
explore the mindset, identity, and inner work required to bring
your biggest, most delulu goals to life. This is your
(02:48):
space to be seen, to be expanded, and to remember
that you are not alone on this journey.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
Let's get into it.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Hello, Hello, Hello, Welcome to all our new listeners. Welcome
back to all of our I don't want to say
old because we're not old to our seasoned listeners. This
concept was originally introduced to me, probably in like twenty eleven,
but around the idea of money. So what if money
were a person, And is your relationship with money like
(03:19):
a healthy relationship if you were dating your money, would
your money you want to date you back?
Speaker 3 (03:26):
And I got to thinking over the last few months
that most of my clients, and for being honest myself,
do not have healthy relationships with their goals.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
We treat our goals with anxiousness. We abandon them, we
feel abandoned by them, We micromanage them, we try to
put pressure on them. And what would change in our
experiences if our goals felt loved, respected, safe. If you
have read it all Big Magic, which is an amazing
(03:58):
book by Elizabeth Gilbert, she talks about how goals are
living energy. Goals are energy. First of all everything is energy,
but also goals are energy, and if we are responding
to an energy in a certain way, that's energy we're
going to get back as well. And those goals, as
(04:20):
living energy, have a choice about whether or not to
be engaged in a relationship with us. And if we're
treating our goals like shit, they're not gonna want to
be in a relationship with us. I want you to
think to yourself right now, when you think about your goals.
Maybe you're an entrepreneur, when you show up in your business,
(04:40):
when you think about the future, what are your most
revalent thoughts and feelings. Let's just start by going through
some signs of what an unhealthy relationship looks like. And
we're going to do this in the context of goals
and visions. If you are feeling like you need obsessive control,
(05:01):
or you have this thing about urgency, like why hasn't
it happened yet? Why isn't it working? Why isn't this
unfolding the way I want it to? That's not healthy.
I want you to imagine being in a relationship with
someone and having them say that to you. I know
there's a common narrative around romantic relationships, one person putting
(05:21):
pressure on another person to be like, when are we
getting engaged? When are we getting married? Why hasn't happened yet?
And when that exchange happens, it doesn't actually feel good
for either person involved. Another sign of having an unhealthy
relationship with your goals and your vision is conditional love.
All feel worthy when it arrives, all work less, and
(05:43):
feel better when my goal shows up from Another sign
of an unhealthy relationship ghosting your goals. If you were
in a relationship with someone and they ghosted you, how
would that feel? And you're ignoring your goals because they
feel too overwhelming? Goals? Then still want to be in
relationship with you. Another one lack of trust. Well, this
(06:04):
probably isn't gonna work anyways, so like, I'm just not
gonna Another one emotional manipulation, beating yourself up or beating
your goals up when the results don't come to you
quickly enough. I want you to really take a hard look,
and it's gonna be a bit of a pill to swallow.
Like if you were to treat a romantic partner in
(06:24):
the ways that you treat your dreams and your goals,
would they stick around, and if not, why are you
doing this to your dreams? If you want your dreams
to show up for you, how do you need to
treat them and what kind of relationship do you need
to have with them? Now, let's talk about the cost
of having an unhealthy, dysfunctional relationship with your goals. First
(06:48):
things first, Energetic Burnout, I have an episode coming up
in July about how if we're in a relationship with
our goals that feels like it is taking more from
us than it is us up, that's not sustainable, that
has an expiration date. The cost of having this dysfunctional
relationship is you're going to have an expiration date for
(07:09):
whatever that goal is. You're going to be constantly feeling
dissatisfied even when progress happens. This is a big one
for a lot of my clients. They're constantly moving the goalpost,
even when progress happens. Even when they've hit the goalpost,
they've already moved it and now they're not there yet again.
And then what happens is they're constantly dissatisfied because they're
(07:30):
never there, because they're perpetually moving that goal post despite
the progress, They're still existing from a place of frustration
and dissatisfaction every single day. Another result is taking fear
driven actions that can create really unaligned results, and then
also having resentment towards your goals rather than being inspired
(07:53):
by them. Rather than wanting to show up and co
create this like beautiful experience with them, you're waking up
feeling resentment. Imagine waking up next to your significant other
every morning and feeling resentment towards them. That's not a
relationship you want to be, and that's not a relationship
they want to be. Let's talk now about what a
healthy relationship with your goals looks like. A healthy relationship
(08:16):
has patience and it has presence. Personally, my husband and I,
every Tuesday night is date night. We commit to being
present with each other on a regular, consistent basis, and if,
for whatever reason one of us has to move something
around or plans change or whatever, we're super understanding and
super patient with each other because we know that we're
(08:38):
willing to keep showing up and be present with each
other no matter what. We're committed to that with each other.
Another healthy example of being in relationship with your goal
is trusting in the perfection of the unfolding of your goals.
What if your goal is actually moving forward exactly like
(08:59):
it's supposed to, even if it doesn't look like you
want it to look. Can you trust that? Can you
trust in the timing? Can you trust in the progress?
Can you trust in the order that things are being done?
Another example showing up with consistency, not obsessing over whether
or not your goal is going to show up for
you today, continuing to show up without the conditions attached
(09:20):
to them. Another one allowing space for cocreation. Are you
actively spending time with and meeting with your goal so
that the two of you can create something incredible together?
And another one celebrating the small moments, not just the
arrival of the goal, but all of the building blocks,
(09:41):
all of the steps that the two of you have
taken together to get to that goal. One of the
things that Jordan and I do in our relationship is
we every Sunday we have a check in and we
try to start those check ins with something that we're
grateful about from the week prior. What were we great
ful about in our experiences together in our relationship? What
(10:04):
are the moments that we're really proud of that we
traversed together that week. And what's really interesting is oftentimes
a lot of those gratitude moments and a lot of
those moments of pride in our relationship are not even
about the progress we've made. Oftentimes it's navigating hard terrain together,
(10:25):
being able to have hard conversations, and being able to
show up for each other in those hard conversations, even
though you know I probably wouldn't celebrate a hard conversation
in a normal circumstance. And then, last, but not least,
we ask a lot of our vision based on what
we need and what we want. But when is the
last time you asked your vision what it needed from you?
(10:48):
When is the last time you asked your vision how
you could be a better partner to it? This is
another question that Jordan and I talk about every single week.
How could I have been a better wife for you
this week? What are ways that I was a great wife?
And also what are the ways that I could have
been a better wife to you this week? When is
the last time you had that conversation with your goals
(11:10):
and with your vision. These things will absolutely not only
change the results you're getting, but change the pathway and
change the journey from you getting where you are to
where you want to be, and feeling like you have
a solid, loving, consistent partner by your side to help
you co create that experience together. We're going to take
(11:32):
a brief little break and then we're going to come
back with more. I'm going to talk about how to
start rebuilding this relationship and then be exciting experience that
I have coming up in July. If you're listening to
this and thinking I wish I had more people in
my life who just get it, you're not alone.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Big Goal Energy women are rare.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
We are the ones dreaming big, defying norms, and refusing
to settle, and that is exactly why I created the
Big Goal Energy App.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
But it's more than just an app.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
It's a community, a safe, supportive space where ambitious women
like you and me can gather, grow and go after
our biggest goals without judgment. Inside you'll find real time conversations,
powerful tools and resources, and exclusive content you won't get
anywhere else, and yes, direct access to me to support.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
You on your journey. Whether you're building, dreaming, shifting, or scaling,
you don't have to do it alone.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
Come join us inside the Big Goal Energy App and
surround yourself with women who dream as.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
Delulu as you do.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Download the app now or visit bre sealy dot com
slash community to learn more. You may have gleaned over
the last fifteen minutes that maybe your relationship with your
goal is not great, So the question becomes, do we
break up or do we go to couples counseling. I
(13:02):
would love for you to go to quote unquote couple's
counseling with your goal. This idea of rebuilding your relationship,
reigniting that connection, rebuilding that trust. I am going to
give you four things. A ritual, a tool, a practice,
and a reframe. All right. The ritual that I want
(13:23):
you to start practicing to rebuild this relationship with your
goal is to begin talking to your vision every single day.
Two easy ways of doing this are journaling or visualization
slash meditation. I want you to envision your goal as
if it were another person. I did this with money
(13:44):
back in twenty eleven when I first learned about this
concept of treating these things in our life as if
they are living, breathing entities. And the woman that gave
the presentation would talk about your money hunt. My money
had a very specific form it looked like a man
that I wanted to be in relationship with. He was sexy,
(14:05):
he was tall, he was strong. We danced together like
it was lovely. Envision your goal as a person. If
this goal were your significant others, rebuild that connection with it.
Talk to it, journal with it, meditate with it, visualize
with it, ask it what it needs of you, and
(14:26):
start talking to it every single day. All right, a tool.
I want you to write a love letter to your
goals from two perspectives. I want you to do one
from your current perspective and I want you to do
one from your future self. Express how important that goal
is to you. Let it know that you're devoted to it.
Let it know that you're gonna keep showing up for
(14:49):
it every single day with love, compassion, and patience. One
of the things that I always loved about when Jordan
and I first started dating, we lived ten hours apart
when we first first met, and so we didn't actually
meet in person for six weeks, and then he was
basically started coming to Tulsa every two weeks thereafter before
(15:09):
we moved in together. One of the things that he
started doing he did this on his very first trip
to Tulsa's. He left me this handwritten note on my
nightstand and it was the sweetest thing, And of course
I let him know how much I appreciated it and
how much I loved it, And I have an entire
stat now of these notes. He still does it to
(15:30):
this day. He just went to Minnesota about a month
ago and he left me a little handwritten, sticky note
on my night side table. He left super early in
the morning, and so I woke up and it was
there underneath my phone. If you could write little notes
or a love letter to your goal, what would you
say to it? And then the other thing you can
actually do too is embody your goal and write a
(15:52):
love letter from your goal to yourself. A practice I
want to invite you into is replacing this pressured language
of I have to, we need to, we're not hitting
our KPIs, we're not hitting our metrics, like all these
pressure things that we speak to our goals about. With
more devotional language, I get to I'm excited to start
(16:16):
speaking about your goals in a different way. If you
said about your significant other, like, h I have to
go on date night tonight, Like do you think your
significant other would really want to continue going on dates
with you versus like, Oh my gosh, I'm so excited.
I get too. I'm in Arizona this weekend, Jordan and
I are each going to go see a movie and
(16:36):
then we get to have date night together where we
talk about the movie and we connect about our favorite parts.
Did this when I was in Arkansas as well. We
both went SA Sinners and then we had a date
night where we get to process it and talk about
it and experience it together even though we weren't in
the same space. And the biggest thing, the reframe that
(16:57):
I really truly want to invite you into with this
episode is that progress is a relationship, not a transaction.
Your experience with your goal on a day to day basis,
the journey that you traverse side by side, hand in
hand with your goal has got to be a relationship.
You know this. You don't like being treated like a transaction.
(17:19):
No one does. Your goal feels the same way, so
give it the respect it deserves. All right. If this
resonated with you and you have a friend who could
really hear this, please share this episode with them. The
more you can help me spread the word about Big
Goal Energy. The better. We are here to serve so
many people, and I'm just excited to help more people
(17:41):
build more nourishing relationships with this goal. Also, I told
you that I would give you a little sneak peek
into a little something something happening in July. I'm filming
this on June eleven, the beginning of June, I was
sitting at my puzzle table and I just spontaneously got
my phone and recorded a podcast while sitting at my
(18:02):
puzzle table. And I decided to launch and over living
underworking experiment for myself, document the entire thing every single
day through the month of June to then gift to
you in the month of July. So the beginning of July,
(18:24):
the first podcast episode will go live, and then every
single day there will be secret podcast episodes in the
Big Gold Energy app so plug. If you don't have
the app, grab it. And then every week during July
there will be the next iteration of what I'm learning,
what I'm experiencing, what I'm going through. It is going
(18:46):
to help you not only let go of the hustle,
but truly recalibrate yourself for a new way of operating
in the world. I don't know about you. I'm so
fucking over overworking. I'm so done with it. I have
zero fucking interest in living like that anymore. I'm going
to the extreme and I'm throwing all of the spaghetti
(19:08):
at the wall and I'm seeing what sticks. The other
thing you're gonna do is reclaim pleasure, presence and sustainable progress,
and you're also going to be able to align your
energy with your vision. So this is to say, if
you are not yet subscribed to Big Goal Energy, now
would be a great time to do that. You don't
want to miss any of the episodes coming in July.
(19:30):
They are going to be a series and they are
going to build upon each other. Not to mention, you
are also going to want to join the Big Goal
Energy app because all of the daily progress updates, which
by the way, are going to be like three minutes long,
are going to be secret episodes that are only available
in the Big Goal Energy app. If you do not
yet have the Big Goal Energy app, open up your
(19:52):
app store right now. Whether you're Android or IIOS, open
up your app store and type in Big Goal Energy.
The app is gonna pop up. It is completely free.
There are paid elements of it, but it is completely free.
Everything about this challenge is completely free, and you are
going to get daily notifications about the updates and the
(20:16):
progress for the challenge. So go do those things. Get subscribed,
join the app. I cannot wait to bring you the
experiment in July. It's obviously I'm like a third of
the way into it, so i don't even know what's
gonna happen yet, which is so cool, so much magic coming.
And last but not least, I just want to remind
(20:37):
you that the relationship you have with your goals sets
the tone for the results you create and how you
feel about them. Because we've all gotten to the results
that we wanted to get to and looked around and thought,
this is it. This doesn't feel the way I want
I thought it was gonna feel. The relationship you have
with your goal is going to set the tone for
(20:59):
the results you create and how you feel.
Speaker 2 (21:01):
When you get there.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
Thank you so much for joining me on this episode
of Big Goal Energy. I don't know about you. I'm
fucking obsessed with this podcast. If you are as well, again,
please share it with someone else. Thank you, thank you,
thank you. I will see you on next week's episode
and I will see you in the app and have
a fantastic week ahead. If this episode lit something up
in you, share it, text it to a friend, post
(21:25):
it to your stories, or leave a review.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Because Big Goal.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
Energy is meant to be felt far and wide, and
if you're ready to go deeper, explore the tools, hypnosis,
sessions and support. Because your vision deserves more than hustle,
join us on the Big Goal Energy app by visiting
your app store and typing in Big Goal Energy. Your vision,
your goals deserve alignment, ease, and your fullest self behind
(21:52):
them Until next time, Trust yourself, dream bigger, and never
forget you are
Speaker 2 (21:58):
Here for greatness.
Welcome back to Big Goal Energy. I'm your hostess, Breez Seely,
and I want to kick off today's episode by asking
you something a little bold. If your vision was a person,
would it still want to be in a relationship with you?
Would your goal feel nurtured, scene supported, excited by your
(00:21):
relationship or would it feel ignored? Would it feel micromanaged,
criticized or condoubted every step of the way. So many
ambitious women have these incredible visions, but we treat those
visions with pressure, anxiety, and mistrust and resentment. We obsessed,
(00:41):
we overwork, we ghost our dreams, and then we expect
them to prove themselves before we commit, and then we
wonder why the hell the relationship feels off? What's wrong
with it? Why do things not feel great? So in
this episode, I want to inc inspire you to evaluate
(01:02):
your current relationship and begin to explore and open up
to what does it look like to have a healthy
relationship with my goals and my vision, a relationship that's
rooted in trust, in reciprocity, in devotion, not just productivity
and pressure. Because your big goals are not going to
(01:23):
thrive in survival mode. Your big goals are going to
grow when you treat them like a sacred partner in
your life. If you are ready to reconnect to your
vision from a place of life giving energy. I have
something very exciting coming in July, and I'm going to
be sharing in this episode how you can join the movement,
(01:46):
the experiment, the challenge to pursue success with your life,
not in spite of it. So let's dive into today's episode.
I'm so excited to explore this concept of your relationship
and ship with your goal.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
You were never meant for a small life.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
You have bold ideas, audacious dreams, and visions that keep
you up at night. But the truth is big goals
don't come with step by step instruction, and success doesn't
come from doing more, It comes from becoming more. Welcome
to Big Goal Energy a podcast for high achieving women
who are done shrinking, striving, and second guessing and are
(02:26):
ready to defy reality in pursuit of the life they
actually want. I'm your hostess, free sealy, goal architect, subconscious strategist,
and your permission slip to want what you want. Join
me as we go beyond the service level success to
explore the mindset, identity, and inner work required to bring
your biggest, most delulu goals to life. This is your
(02:48):
space to be seen, to be expanded, and to remember
that you are not alone on this journey.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
Let's get into it.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Hello, Hello, Hello, Welcome to all our new listeners. Welcome
back to all of our I don't want to say
old because we're not old to our seasoned listeners. This
concept was originally introduced to me, probably in like twenty eleven,
but around the idea of money. So what if money
were a person, And is your relationship with money like
(03:19):
a healthy relationship if you were dating your money, would
your money you want to date you back?
Speaker 3 (03:26):
And I got to thinking over the last few months
that most of my clients, and for being honest myself,
do not have healthy relationships with their goals.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
We treat our goals with anxiousness. We abandon them, we
feel abandoned by them, We micromanage them, we try to
put pressure on them. And what would change in our
experiences if our goals felt loved, respected, safe. If you
have read it all Big Magic, which is an amazing
(03:58):
book by Elizabeth Gilbert, she talks about how goals are
living energy. Goals are energy. First of all everything is energy,
but also goals are energy, and if we are responding
to an energy in a certain way, that's energy we're
going to get back as well. And those goals, as
(04:20):
living energy, have a choice about whether or not to
be engaged in a relationship with us. And if we're
treating our goals like shit, they're not gonna want to
be in a relationship with us. I want you to
think to yourself right now, when you think about your goals.
Maybe you're an entrepreneur, when you show up in your business,
(04:40):
when you think about the future, what are your most
revalent thoughts and feelings. Let's just start by going through
some signs of what an unhealthy relationship looks like. And
we're going to do this in the context of goals
and visions. If you are feeling like you need obsessive control,
(05:01):
or you have this thing about urgency, like why hasn't
it happened yet? Why isn't it working? Why isn't this
unfolding the way I want it to? That's not healthy.
I want you to imagine being in a relationship with
someone and having them say that to you. I know
there's a common narrative around romantic relationships, one person putting
(05:21):
pressure on another person to be like, when are we
getting engaged? When are we getting married? Why hasn't happened yet?
And when that exchange happens, it doesn't actually feel good
for either person involved. Another sign of having an unhealthy
relationship with your goals and your vision is conditional love.
All feel worthy when it arrives, all work less, and
(05:43):
feel better when my goal shows up from Another sign
of an unhealthy relationship ghosting your goals. If you were
in a relationship with someone and they ghosted you, how
would that feel? And you're ignoring your goals because they
feel too overwhelming? Goals? Then still want to be in
relationship with you. Another one lack of trust. Well, this
(06:04):
probably isn't gonna work anyways, so like, I'm just not
gonna Another one emotional manipulation, beating yourself up or beating
your goals up when the results don't come to you
quickly enough. I want you to really take a hard look,
and it's gonna be a bit of a pill to swallow.
Like if you were to treat a romantic partner in
(06:24):
the ways that you treat your dreams and your goals,
would they stick around, and if not, why are you
doing this to your dreams? If you want your dreams
to show up for you, how do you need to
treat them and what kind of relationship do you need
to have with them? Now, let's talk about the cost
of having an unhealthy, dysfunctional relationship with your goals. First
(06:48):
things first, Energetic Burnout, I have an episode coming up
in July about how if we're in a relationship with
our goals that feels like it is taking more from
us than it is us up, that's not sustainable, that
has an expiration date. The cost of having this dysfunctional
relationship is you're going to have an expiration date for
(07:09):
whatever that goal is. You're going to be constantly feeling
dissatisfied even when progress happens. This is a big one
for a lot of my clients. They're constantly moving the goalpost,
even when progress happens. Even when they've hit the goalpost,
they've already moved it and now they're not there yet again.
And then what happens is they're constantly dissatisfied because they're
(07:30):
never there, because they're perpetually moving that goal post despite
the progress, They're still existing from a place of frustration
and dissatisfaction every single day. Another result is taking fear
driven actions that can create really unaligned results, and then
also having resentment towards your goals rather than being inspired
(07:53):
by them. Rather than wanting to show up and co
create this like beautiful experience with them, you're waking up
feeling resentment. Imagine waking up next to your significant other
every morning and feeling resentment towards them. That's not a
relationship you want to be, and that's not a relationship
they want to be. Let's talk now about what a
healthy relationship with your goals looks like. A healthy relationship
(08:16):
has patience and it has presence. Personally, my husband and I,
every Tuesday night is date night. We commit to being
present with each other on a regular, consistent basis, and if,
for whatever reason one of us has to move something
around or plans change or whatever, we're super understanding and
super patient with each other because we know that we're
(08:38):
willing to keep showing up and be present with each
other no matter what. We're committed to that with each other.
Another healthy example of being in relationship with your goal
is trusting in the perfection of the unfolding of your goals.
What if your goal is actually moving forward exactly like
(08:59):
it's supposed to, even if it doesn't look like you
want it to look. Can you trust that? Can you
trust in the timing? Can you trust in the progress?
Can you trust in the order that things are being done?
Another example showing up with consistency, not obsessing over whether
or not your goal is going to show up for
you today, continuing to show up without the conditions attached
(09:20):
to them. Another one allowing space for cocreation. Are you
actively spending time with and meeting with your goal so
that the two of you can create something incredible together?
And another one celebrating the small moments, not just the
arrival of the goal, but all of the building blocks,
(09:41):
all of the steps that the two of you have
taken together to get to that goal. One of the
things that Jordan and I do in our relationship is
we every Sunday we have a check in and we
try to start those check ins with something that we're
grateful about from the week prior. What were we great
ful about in our experiences together in our relationship? What
(10:04):
are the moments that we're really proud of that we
traversed together that week. And what's really interesting is oftentimes
a lot of those gratitude moments and a lot of
those moments of pride in our relationship are not even
about the progress we've made. Oftentimes it's navigating hard terrain together,
(10:25):
being able to have hard conversations, and being able to
show up for each other in those hard conversations, even
though you know I probably wouldn't celebrate a hard conversation
in a normal circumstance. And then, last, but not least,
we ask a lot of our vision based on what
we need and what we want. But when is the
last time you asked your vision what it needed from you?
(10:48):
When is the last time you asked your vision how
you could be a better partner to it? This is
another question that Jordan and I talk about every single week.
How could I have been a better wife for you
this week? What are ways that I was a great wife?
And also what are the ways that I could have
been a better wife to you this week? When is
the last time you had that conversation with your goals
(11:10):
and with your vision. These things will absolutely not only
change the results you're getting, but change the pathway and
change the journey from you getting where you are to
where you want to be, and feeling like you have
a solid, loving, consistent partner by your side to help
you co create that experience together. We're going to take
(11:32):
a brief little break and then we're going to come
back with more. I'm going to talk about how to
start rebuilding this relationship and then be exciting experience that
I have coming up in July. If you're listening to
this and thinking I wish I had more people in
my life who just get it, you're not alone.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Big Goal Energy women are rare.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
We are the ones dreaming big, defying norms, and refusing
to settle, and that is exactly why I created the
Big Goal Energy App.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
But it's more than just an app.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
It's a community, a safe, supportive space where ambitious women
like you and me can gather, grow and go after
our biggest goals without judgment. Inside you'll find real time conversations,
powerful tools and resources, and exclusive content you won't get
anywhere else, and yes, direct access to me to support.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
You on your journey. Whether you're building, dreaming, shifting, or scaling,
you don't have to do it alone.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
Come join us inside the Big Goal Energy App and
surround yourself with women who dream as.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
Delulu as you do.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Download the app now or visit bre sealy dot com
slash community to learn more. You may have gleaned over
the last fifteen minutes that maybe your relationship with your
goal is not great, So the question becomes, do we
break up or do we go to couples counseling. I
(13:02):
would love for you to go to quote unquote couple's
counseling with your goal. This idea of rebuilding your relationship,
reigniting that connection, rebuilding that trust. I am going to
give you four things. A ritual, a tool, a practice,
and a reframe. All right. The ritual that I want
(13:23):
you to start practicing to rebuild this relationship with your
goal is to begin talking to your vision every single day.
Two easy ways of doing this are journaling or visualization
slash meditation. I want you to envision your goal as
if it were another person. I did this with money
(13:44):
back in twenty eleven when I first learned about this
concept of treating these things in our life as if
they are living, breathing entities. And the woman that gave
the presentation would talk about your money hunt. My money
had a very specific form it looked like a man
that I wanted to be in relationship with. He was sexy,
(14:05):
he was tall, he was strong. We danced together like
it was lovely. Envision your goal as a person. If
this goal were your significant others, rebuild that connection with it.
Talk to it, journal with it, meditate with it, visualize
with it, ask it what it needs of you, and
(14:26):
start talking to it every single day. All right, a tool.
I want you to write a love letter to your
goals from two perspectives. I want you to do one
from your current perspective and I want you to do
one from your future self. Express how important that goal
is to you. Let it know that you're devoted to it.
Let it know that you're gonna keep showing up for
(14:49):
it every single day with love, compassion, and patience. One
of the things that I always loved about when Jordan
and I first started dating, we lived ten hours apart
when we first first met, and so we didn't actually
meet in person for six weeks, and then he was
basically started coming to Tulsa every two weeks thereafter before
(15:09):
we moved in together. One of the things that he
started doing he did this on his very first trip
to Tulsa's. He left me this handwritten note on my
nightstand and it was the sweetest thing, And of course
I let him know how much I appreciated it and
how much I loved it, And I have an entire
stat now of these notes. He still does it to
(15:30):
this day. He just went to Minnesota about a month
ago and he left me a little handwritten, sticky note
on my night side table. He left super early in
the morning, and so I woke up and it was
there underneath my phone. If you could write little notes
or a love letter to your goal, what would you
say to it? And then the other thing you can
actually do too is embody your goal and write a
(15:52):
love letter from your goal to yourself. A practice I
want to invite you into is replacing this pressured language
of I have to, we need to, we're not hitting
our KPIs, we're not hitting our metrics, like all these
pressure things that we speak to our goals about. With
more devotional language, I get to I'm excited to start
(16:16):
speaking about your goals in a different way. If you
said about your significant other, like, h I have to
go on date night tonight, Like do you think your
significant other would really want to continue going on dates
with you versus like, Oh my gosh, I'm so excited.
I get too. I'm in Arizona this weekend, Jordan and
I are each going to go see a movie and
(16:36):
then we get to have date night together where we
talk about the movie and we connect about our favorite parts.
Did this when I was in Arkansas as well. We
both went SA Sinners and then we had a date
night where we get to process it and talk about
it and experience it together even though we weren't in
the same space. And the biggest thing, the reframe that
(16:57):
I really truly want to invite you into with this
episode is that progress is a relationship, not a transaction.
Your experience with your goal on a day to day basis,
the journey that you traverse side by side, hand in
hand with your goal has got to be a relationship.
You know this. You don't like being treated like a transaction.
(17:19):
No one does. Your goal feels the same way, so
give it the respect it deserves. All right. If this
resonated with you and you have a friend who could
really hear this, please share this episode with them. The
more you can help me spread the word about Big
Goal Energy. The better. We are here to serve so
many people, and I'm just excited to help more people
(17:41):
build more nourishing relationships with this goal. Also, I told
you that I would give you a little sneak peek
into a little something something happening in July. I'm filming
this on June eleven, the beginning of June, I was
sitting at my puzzle table and I just spontaneously got
my phone and recorded a podcast while sitting at my
(18:02):
puzzle table. And I decided to launch and over living
underworking experiment for myself, document the entire thing every single
day through the month of June to then gift to
you in the month of July. So the beginning of July,
(18:24):
the first podcast episode will go live, and then every
single day there will be secret podcast episodes in the
Big Gold Energy app so plug. If you don't have
the app, grab it. And then every week during July
there will be the next iteration of what I'm learning,
what I'm experiencing, what I'm going through. It is going
(18:46):
to help you not only let go of the hustle,
but truly recalibrate yourself for a new way of operating
in the world. I don't know about you. I'm so
fucking over overworking. I'm so done with it. I have
zero fucking interest in living like that anymore. I'm going
to the extreme and I'm throwing all of the spaghetti
(19:08):
at the wall and I'm seeing what sticks. The other
thing you're gonna do is reclaim pleasure, presence and sustainable progress,
and you're also going to be able to align your
energy with your vision. So this is to say, if
you are not yet subscribed to Big Goal Energy, now
would be a great time to do that. You don't
want to miss any of the episodes coming in July.
(19:30):
They are going to be a series and they are
going to build upon each other. Not to mention, you
are also going to want to join the Big Goal
Energy app because all of the daily progress updates, which
by the way, are going to be like three minutes long,
are going to be secret episodes that are only available
in the Big Goal Energy app. If you do not
yet have the Big Goal Energy app, open up your
(19:52):
app store right now. Whether you're Android or IIOS, open
up your app store and type in Big Goal Energy.
The app is gonna pop up. It is completely free.
There are paid elements of it, but it is completely free.
Everything about this challenge is completely free, and you are
going to get daily notifications about the updates and the
(20:16):
progress for the challenge. So go do those things. Get subscribed,
join the app. I cannot wait to bring you the
experiment in July. It's obviously I'm like a third of
the way into it, so i don't even know what's
gonna happen yet, which is so cool, so much magic coming.
And last but not least, I just want to remind
(20:37):
you that the relationship you have with your goals sets
the tone for the results you create and how you
feel about them. Because we've all gotten to the results
that we wanted to get to and looked around and thought,
this is it. This doesn't feel the way I want
I thought it was gonna feel. The relationship you have
with your goal is going to set the tone for
(20:59):
the results you create and how you feel.
Speaker 2 (21:01):
When you get there.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
Thank you so much for joining me on this episode
of Big Goal Energy. I don't know about you. I'm
fucking obsessed with this podcast. If you are as well, again,
please share it with someone else. Thank you, thank you,
thank you. I will see you on next week's episode
and I will see you in the app and have
a fantastic week ahead. If this episode lit something up
in you, share it, text it to a friend, post
(21:25):
it to your stories, or leave a review.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Because Big Goal.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
Energy is meant to be felt far and wide, and
if you're ready to go deeper, explore the tools, hypnosis,
sessions and support. Because your vision deserves more than hustle,
join us on the Big Goal Energy app by visiting
your app store and typing in Big Goal Energy. Your vision,
your goals deserve alignment, ease, and your fullest self behind
(21:52):
them Until next time, Trust yourself, dream bigger, and never
forget you are
Speaker 2 (21:58):
Here for greatness.
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