March 18, 2025 • 25 mins
Are you chasing success but feeling unfulfilled? Today, I challenge the outdated myths about success and ambition that may be holding you back from truly thriving.
In this episode, we'll cover things like why "success requires sacrifice" is a dangerous lie and the truth about failure and its role in your journey.
This episode is a wake-up call for any ambitious woman who's ever felt conflicted about her goals or burnt out on the path to achievement. It's time to redefine success on your own terms and create a thriving business and life you love.
If you're ready to break free from these limiting beliefs at a subconscious level, I introduce a powerful new tool: 30-day hypnosis programs designed to upgrade your mental operating system for sustainable success.
Are you prepared to shatter the myths holding you back? Tune in and let's reprogram your path to success – no sacrifice required.
In this episode, we'll cover things like why "success requires sacrifice" is a dangerous lie and the truth about failure and its role in your journey.
This episode is a wake-up call for any ambitious woman who's ever felt conflicted about her goals or burnt out on the path to achievement. It's time to redefine success on your own terms and create a thriving business and life you love.
If you're ready to break free from these limiting beliefs at a subconscious level, I introduce a powerful new tool: 30-day hypnosis programs designed to upgrade your mental operating system for sustainable success.
Are you prepared to shatter the myths holding you back? Tune in and let's reprogram your path to success – no sacrifice required.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Success is supposed to feel good, right, So why do
so many of us high achievers push ourselves to exhaustion,
We chase goals that don't actually fulfill us, and then
we're constantly battling fear and self doubt within ourselves as well.
The truth is that most of us are operating under
outdated myths about success and ambition, stories that we have
(00:23):
been told by our families, by mentors, by teachers, by
society about what it takes to make it. We've been
taught that success requires sacrifice, that there's only one right
way to achieve it, that we have to eliminate fear
before we take action, that success alone is going to
bring us all of the fulfillment, enjoy, and purpose that
(00:45):
we need in our life, and all of that, our lives,
all of it. Here's the thing, all of these things
are myths, and we pulled on to them even though
they're not for us, and they're keeping us stay luck.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
They're keeping us from.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
The lives, the careers, the businesses, the legacies.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
That we actually crave.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
In today's episode, a big Goal Energy, we are going
to dismantle these myths one by one. We are going
to break them all apart, like we're going to a
big old rage room, and then we're going to replace
them with new, more empowering truths, truths that actually allow
us to achieve at our highest levels peak performance without burnout,
(01:30):
healthy relationship with fear, and knowing that whatever we decide
to put our energy or heart, our truth behind is enough.
And if you're ready to go even deeper after this episode,
I am going to give you a powerful tool to
help you rewire these beliefs at a subconscious level, permanently, permanently,
(01:51):
so that you can step into the successes, goals, the visions,
everything that you crave on your term in under thirty days.
I'm Brie Seely, your hostess for Big Goal Energy. Come
with me as we dive into breaking a whole bunch
of myths today so that you can achieve the success
(02:14):
that you most crave in your life and business. I
can tell you've got Big Goal Energy. Are you ready
to turn your wildest dreams into your everyday reality?
Speaker 2 (02:23):
You are in the right place.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Welcome to Big Goal Energy, the podcast that helps you
turn your.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
Audacious and delusional dreams into your everyday life.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
We know that you don't sell for the ordinary that
you have dreams which others may deem unrealistic.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
But here we help you defy reality and bring those
dreams to life.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Each episode of Big Goal Energy empowers you with knowledge, inspiration,
and mentorship to conquer your most unrealistic goals. From transparent,
roundtable conversations to short form episodes, you'll hear the experiences
of women who have defied reality, as well as learned
practical tips and strategies to fuel your journey. Join us
by subscribing to Big Goal Energy, and together will turn
(03:02):
your audacious dreams into remarkable achievements.
Speaker 2 (03:08):
Hello, Big Goal Energy, so excited to be with you today.
We are going to be.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Exploring some common myths around success, around failure, around ambition,
around sacrifice, and if you listen to last week's episode,
the reason that I'm doing this is because, just like
that client that I highlighted in last week's episode, if
we're living by rules to a game that we're no
longer playing, we're literally putting up invisible barriers that prevent
(03:38):
us from actually doing what we want to do. We're
going to break down five myths today and then we're
going to look at what you need to replace it with.
The stories, the narratives, the truths that you need to
live by so that you can break down all of
those invisible.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
Barriers and actually give.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
Yourself permission to go towards your big goal and I
don't know, feel great while you're doing it. So let's
dive into myth one. The first myth is that success
requires sacrifice. We've seen these narratives all over TV shows, movies,
the media, all this stuff that if you want to
(04:17):
be a top level executive, if you want to be
a booked and busy CEO, that you cannot have great relationships.
You have to sacrifice your well being.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
You need to have.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
All sorts of vices just to keep you going, and
you're gonna be burnt out all the time. This is
a lie. Gonna hear me say that a lot on
this episode. This is a lie. Success in and of
itself does not demand burnout. It does not demand you
to neglect your relationships, and it does not demand you
(04:49):
to sacrifice your well being.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Now, depending on what your.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Goals are, you need to design and build a life
where all of it works. That's not to say that
you're going to be one hundred percent in every single
area of your life all the time. But it is
to say that your relationships don't have to go down
to a zero in order for your business or your
(05:12):
career to be at a ten. Right, your well being
doesn't have to be at a one in order for
your career and your business to be at a ten.
I'm not sure why this narrative got placed into our society.
I mean, okay, maybe I am a little bit, but
we are not going to get into that today. What
we want to replace this lie with is that success
(05:35):
should be sustainable, it should be aligned, and it should
actually be life enhance it. Here's one of the things
I see a lot with people is that if their
business or career success is going up, their life enhancement
is going down. And the truth is, we actually want
both of those meters to be rising in equal measure.
(05:57):
They should be rising proportionately. Accesses going up, your life
enhancement should be going up.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
And the way that we do that is by building.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Sustainable and aligned businesses, careers, lives, relationships, well being, etc.
You probably heard me say this before, but I see
all of this like a big puzzle, and in order
for all of the pieces to work and actually create
the picture that you want.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
To be living.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
All of the pieces have to fit together, and they
all have to be from the same puzzle. I'm a
master puzzler, and I opened up a puzzle box the
other day and there was a piece in the puzzle
box that didn't.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
Go to that puzzle.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Did I spend hours trying to fit that piece into
the puzzle that it didn't belong in. No. I put
it back in the cabinet and was like, well, whenever
I figure out what puzzle this goes to, this will
go back in the box that it belongs in. But
it doesn't belong in this box. If you have a
piece of the puzzle right now that is in your
picture that doesn't belong there, it is up to you
(06:58):
to get rid of it. If that piece of the
puzzle that doesn't belong there for you is burnout or
neglecting relationships or sacrificing your well being, you have permission
to take that puzzle piece, throw it in the garbage.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Don't put it in the cabinet, throw it in the garbage.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
Success is meant to be sustainable, it is meant to
be life enhancing, it is meant to feel good.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Let's move on. To myth number two. I love this one.
Success is one size fits all.
Speaker 1 (07:29):
Everyone needs to be going after the same blueprint for success.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
This is so much bullshit. I know. It's really common.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
When we're growing up we see like, oh, well, if
I just have a six figure salary and a car
and a house and a white picket fence and two
point five children and all of this stuff, then I'll
be successful. I cannot count for you how many women
I have works with and spoken to that have all
aimed for that vision of success, all gotten there, looked
(08:01):
around and been like, this is it this This doesn't
feel right. This doesn't feel like I thought it was
going to feel. And that's because there is no one
size fits all.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
It's a lie. There is no universal blueprint for success.
What you want to replace.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
This myth with is success is personal, and I owe
it to myself to figure out what that means. Now,
this definition may change as you changed, So it's really, really,
really important to be in relationship with your definition of success.
This is not a set it and forget it thing.
(08:42):
This is a I've changed, I've evolved. Now, how does
my definition of success change and.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Evolve with me?
Speaker 1 (08:49):
A lot of you listening right now, know that I
relocated from Manhattan to Tulsa, Oklahoma during the pandemic on Tulsa, Oklahoma.
Was not my personal deafae mission of success. In fact,
Manhattan was my personal definition of success and it had
been for thirty five years. I moved to Tulsa holding
(09:10):
on to this definition that success was living in Manhattan,
and then I wasn't living in Manhattan.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
It was a problem.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
There was dissonance there, right, So I had to redefine.
I had to revisit my relationship with success to say, okay,
this was important to Youngbrie five year old Brie, ten
year old Brie, fifteen year old Brie Hell, thirty five
year old Brie. Is this still an important element of
(09:38):
my success?
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Or Can I live anywhere and do what I want
anywhere and enjoy.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
A completely different lifestyle here with now four years later,
my husband and experience success on a different level now,
the journey that I've had, I know no one else
that has had my journey. There is no one side
fits all. Last thing on this. I want to say,
y'all know I was a fashion designer. People still come
(10:05):
to me and say, three, I just need you to
take me shopping because I can't find anything on the
racks that fits me and fits me well. And I
say to them every single time, you do not need
me to take you shopping. What you need is a
good tailor. The sizing of our clothes is meant to
fit most people that.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Are of that size.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
However, if your proportions are different than the proportions that
they use to craft the pattern in the first place,
it's not going.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
To fit you.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Nothing is going to fit you, which means that instead
of this idea that I'm going to be able to
grab this blueprint and it's just going to fit me
again is a complete.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
Total, utter lie.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
In this vein of success, we don't want to grab
something off the rack and assume that it is going
to fit us what we need. We can take that
as a starting point, but then we need to take
that to a tailor and say, I have different proportions.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
One leg is longer than the other leg. Please help
me refine this to fit my body.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
The exact same process that you have to go through
for your definition of success.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
Mith three. This is one of my favorites.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
You have to eliminate fear to succeed I can't tell
you how many times people have said to me, like, Oh,
you're just so fearless. You do all of these things,
You've let you know, You've moved all over the world,
you've started all these businesses, you've done all these things.
You must be fearless. Fear is actually a natural experience,
and waiting to be fearless is keeping you stuck. So
(11:41):
I talk about all the time, I am not fearless.
What I have done is cultivated a very beautiful relationship
with my fear. Now, a lot of people experience fear
and back off and say this is not for me.
I experience fear, and I say, oh, interesting, why is
this emotion coming up for me right now? Oftentimes it's
(12:03):
because whatever I'm going up against is outside my comfort zone.
Because it's outside my comfort zone, fear is the natural
response to that. Fear is designed to keep us safe.
It's designed to keep us in our comfort zone so
that we don't do something that will harm us. So oftentimes,
if I'm experiencing fear, it's like, oh, I must be
(12:25):
expanding right now. When I invest in working with new coaches,
fear always comes up. I just bought a car last weekend,
and I'm sitting in the car saying to myself, I
know that I have nothing to be afraid of right now,
and yet my brain is.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
Like, what if you never get another client ever again?
Speaker 1 (12:46):
What proof do we have of that I'm about to
celebrate ten years in business. Does my brain have a
reason to say You're never gonna get another client ever again? Actually,
on the contrary, I'm about to sign my biggest client
who is enrolling at double the amount that I've ever
charged a private client before. When we step back and say,
(13:10):
why is this coming up for me right now? It
helps us build a healthy relationship with fear, rather than
just throwing fear the keys and being like, Okay, I'm done, you.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
Drive, I'm good, I'm good.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
Success comes as a result of taking action despite fear.
It's about linking arms with that fear and saying, I
know you're really scared right now. I know that this
step that I'm about to take feels really big. But
I promise got you, I've got us. We're gonna be okay.
(13:45):
And regardless if this action turns out exactly like I
think it's going to or not or better, we are
going to be okay. High achievers embrace fear when they're
going after their big, big goals. We're gonna take just
a quick quick break. I have a free resource for you,
(14:06):
and then we're gonna come back. I'm gonna give you
the last two myths and then a resource for you
to help you overcome a lot of these narratives in
your life. Pardon this quick interruption. One of the biggest
challenges ambitious entrepreneurs face is closing the gap between where
they are and their big, big goal. I've created a
(14:26):
resource for you that will help you navigate the journey
more easily defy reality. The Female Entrepreneur's Guide to Achieving
her audaciously ambitious goals will guide you through a process
to one hundred and ten percent claim the inevitability of
your big delusional goal, banish your doubts, and identify the
exact steps you need to take to defy reality. Visit
(14:50):
free sealy dot com slash free to get immediate access
to this tool that will help you stop wasting your
time so you can start defying reality. And now back
to your episode. Oh hello, welcome back. Okay, let's dive
into myth four. Success automatically leads to fulfillment. Now here's
(15:15):
what's so.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
Interesting about this.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
We can rack up late after accolade after accolade after accolade,
and still look at our lives and be like, I'm
not happy, I'm not fulfilled. Success doesn't lead to fulfillment.
Fulfillment leads to success. If we are always waiting for
(15:39):
external circumstances to guarantee us internal happiness, it's going to
be a long, cold, miserable road. We start with the
internal happiness, we start with the fulfillment, and when we
have that as a baseline, success gets to be the
whipped cream and the chair on top of an already
(16:01):
delicious Sunday. But if we don't have a baseline, and
our sunday dish is empty and we're trying to fill
it with all these outer things, and maybe we get
a success one day but not the next day, then
we're riding that roller coaster of I'm successful, I'm a failure,
I'm successful, I'm a failure because we are waiting for
external things to.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Tell us who the fuck we are. And I don't
know about you.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
I just got a new bracelet, this one right here,
and it says, remember who the fuck you are? My
external success happens as a result of my internal fulfillment
and happiness. And when we can do that, we develop
way more resiliency in our journeys because then if something
(16:46):
doesn't go the way we want it to go, it
doesn't derail us because we're already good. We've already got
a baseline within us. When we have that baseline, then
we get to say, oh, Okay, that didn't turn out
the way I wanted it to, And how to do
I pivot?
Speaker 2 (17:00):
How do I take the next step? How do I
keep going?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Because I feel fucking great and I'm ready to achieve
this big goal I have. I don't need to wait
for external markers to tell me that I'm successful with this.
I need to have that baseline happiness and fulfillment as
my internal guidance and let myself continue showing up in
that state, taking steps, and that external success is going
(17:26):
to come. The inner leads to the outer, not the
other way around. All right, final myth myth five Failure
is the opposite of success.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Oh, this one's so good too.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
We think that it's an either or either I succeeded
or I failed. What I found is really interesting, especially
in the last ten years of running this business is
that the failure success conversation is not an either or conversation.
It's a spectrum conversation. So it's not one hundred percent
(18:01):
success in zero percent failure or one hundred percent failure
in zero percent success. Most of the experiences we have
lies somewhere in the middle. Maybe it was a seventy
percent failure and a thirty percent success, or a fifty
to fifty or an eighty twenty. Because when we go
into this place where this was one hundred percent failure
(18:23):
and a zero percent success, it really limits our ability
to then move into our next steps or our next phases.
When I shut down my fashion business, that's immediately where
I went, even though I knew that I was being guided,
that my steps were actually in alignment, that I was
(18:43):
being called to make a change that would bring me
the happiness and fulfillment that I was looking for. When
we are at one hundred percent failure point and we're
trying to get to one hundred percent success point, that
is a big gap. So what I did was I
started looking, but all of the areas where yes, could
I have done better in that business? There are absolutely
(19:05):
things that I could have done better, but even that
learning in and of itself meant that it wasn't a failure.
There were also a lot of things that I did
really fucking well in that business, and I was able
to recognize, like, wow, I did a lot of press placements.
I dressed celebrities. I sold to some of the largest
(19:27):
e commerce platforms that exist in our country, and I
did all of that mostly without help. I built on
my own websites, I did on my own bookkeeping. All
of the business skills that I gained in that business
over the course of eight years are what has allowed
me to be in this business for ten years, helping
(19:47):
other women build multiple six and seven figure businesses for themselves.
So if I were to look at that experience and
just write it off as a failure, that would completely
negate a huge part of my journey. That has been
the stepping stone for me to get to this point
and for me to continue building and growing this business
even after my ten year birthday mark. Hey oh, I
(20:11):
even saw the guy who launched dollar per month shave
clob talks about this as well. I saw an interview
with him years and years and years ago as I
was getting ready to write my book Permission to Leap,
And he talked about how he had a business prior
to that that ended terribly. It was a huge failure
and if he hadn't done that business, dollar per month
(20:34):
shave club would not exist.
Speaker 2 (20:36):
I want you to start thinking about.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
This failure success again as more of a spectrum and
as less of a black and white yes or no.
One hundred percent failure or one hundred percent success. Its
failure and success the power of the and it is
both give yourself permission to look back at your failures
(20:59):
and see what were the successes within that failure and
how were they data points for me to continue stepping
through my drink. The problem with a lot of these
myths and these beliefs is that oftentimes they are deeply
ingrained in our subconscious.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
Now, if you know anything about the.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
Brain, you know that on average, your conscious mind is
only about five percent of what you can access up
your brain on any given day. That means ninety five
percent of your brain you cannot access consciously. All these
myths that we just talked about, if there was one
where you were like you were preaching to the choir,
(21:42):
there's a very strong likelihood that that belief has been
ingrained in you for multiple decades. And if that is
the case, it is very likely in your subconscious. Personally,
I use hypnotherapy to get into my subconscious to be
able to shift to those narratives and shift those patternings.
(22:02):
I like to think of our brains as like multiple
super highways. The number of neurons and pathways and things
moving through our brains at all times. The amount of
information processes is so immense that if we can only
access five percent of that, we are trying to deploy
an atomic bomb. But really we're just throwing one of
(22:23):
those like little popper things that you throw at at
the fourth of July that just goes right, very very
very different. So, if you want to make some strides
on a subconscious level with some of these myths so
that you can move forward and remove those invisible barriers
that we were talking about earlier, I'm going to be
(22:44):
launching some thirty day hypnosis programs to help you clear
out these beliefs so that you can program your mind
for sustainable success. The way I like to think about
this is you click update on your iOS system, on
your operating system, on your laptop, on your phone, on
all your devices. All the time, you're constantly upgrading the
(23:06):
operating system. But when is the last time you upgrade
to the operating system? To your mind, these thirty day
hypnosis programs are not only going to help you do that,
They're going to give you accountability for thirty days. I'm
going to be in your inbox, checking in with you
for thirty days to help you make these shifts. Because
for ambitious individuals with big goals, it is just so
(23:28):
so so important for us to have tools that we
can use to clear these things within ourselves and really
truly upgrade our operating systems so that we can move
more quickly towards our goals. So these are not released yet,
I'm giving you kind of like an early preview of
what is coming. If you would like access to these
prior to them being released early access with some special discounts,
(23:53):
go to breseealy dot com slash hypnosis and you can
sign up to be notified when we release these programs.
In closing, I just want to encourage you to reflect
on which of these myths that you've been carrying and
living by, and I want to invite you to take
this as an opportunity to put it down, to let
it go, to walk away. Let's use this as a
(24:15):
moment where we hit the reset button and say, I
don't want those. I don't want those to control me anymore.
I don't want those to set my trajectory. I don't
want those to be invisible barriers that I just can't see.
This is an invitation for you to take the next
step in truly upgrading your operating system so you can
go to bre sealy dot com slash hypnosis. Also, don't
(24:37):
forget to visit bri sealy dot com slash community and
get access to over one thousand amazing women who are
Big Goal Energy women. Thank you, thank you, thank you
for joining me for this episode of Big Goal Energy.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
Make sure you're subscribed. Feel free to.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
Send this episode to a friend who might need it.
Big hugs and I will see you all on next
week's episode. Thank you for joining us on this episode
of Big Goal Energy. We trust that it fueled your
ambition and made you feel seen. We are a community
of ambitious female entrepreneurs like you. Come join us in
the Big Goal Energy community by visiting brecaly dot com
(25:13):
slash community In the meantime, send your questions for us
to cover in the episodes to info at bresealy dot com. Together,
we'll turn your audacious dreams into remarkable achievements. Cheers to
defying reality. See you on the next episode.
Success is supposed to feel good, right, So why do
so many of us high achievers push ourselves to exhaustion,
We chase goals that don't actually fulfill us, and then
we're constantly battling fear and self doubt within ourselves as well.
The truth is that most of us are operating under
outdated myths about success and ambition, stories that we have
(00:23):
been told by our families, by mentors, by teachers, by
society about what it takes to make it. We've been
taught that success requires sacrifice, that there's only one right
way to achieve it, that we have to eliminate fear
before we take action, that success alone is going to
bring us all of the fulfillment, enjoy, and purpose that
(00:45):
we need in our life, and all of that, our lives,
all of it. Here's the thing, all of these things
are myths, and we pulled on to them even though
they're not for us, and they're keeping us stay luck.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
They're keeping us from.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
The lives, the careers, the businesses, the legacies.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
That we actually crave.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
In today's episode, a big Goal Energy, we are going
to dismantle these myths one by one. We are going
to break them all apart, like we're going to a
big old rage room, and then we're going to replace
them with new, more empowering truths, truths that actually allow
us to achieve at our highest levels peak performance without burnout,
(01:30):
healthy relationship with fear, and knowing that whatever we decide
to put our energy or heart, our truth behind is enough.
And if you're ready to go even deeper after this episode,
I am going to give you a powerful tool to
help you rewire these beliefs at a subconscious level, permanently, permanently,
(01:51):
so that you can step into the successes, goals, the visions,
everything that you crave on your term in under thirty days.
I'm Brie Seely, your hostess for Big Goal Energy. Come
with me as we dive into breaking a whole bunch
of myths today so that you can achieve the success
(02:14):
that you most crave in your life and business. I
can tell you've got Big Goal Energy. Are you ready
to turn your wildest dreams into your everyday reality?
Speaker 2 (02:23):
You are in the right place.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Welcome to Big Goal Energy, the podcast that helps you
turn your.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
Audacious and delusional dreams into your everyday life.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
We know that you don't sell for the ordinary that
you have dreams which others may deem unrealistic.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
But here we help you defy reality and bring those
dreams to life.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Each episode of Big Goal Energy empowers you with knowledge, inspiration,
and mentorship to conquer your most unrealistic goals. From transparent,
roundtable conversations to short form episodes, you'll hear the experiences
of women who have defied reality, as well as learned
practical tips and strategies to fuel your journey. Join us
by subscribing to Big Goal Energy, and together will turn
(03:02):
your audacious dreams into remarkable achievements.
Speaker 2 (03:08):
Hello, Big Goal Energy, so excited to be with you today.
We are going to be.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Exploring some common myths around success, around failure, around ambition,
around sacrifice, and if you listen to last week's episode,
the reason that I'm doing this is because, just like
that client that I highlighted in last week's episode, if
we're living by rules to a game that we're no
longer playing, we're literally putting up invisible barriers that prevent
(03:38):
us from actually doing what we want to do. We're
going to break down five myths today and then we're
going to look at what you need to replace it with.
The stories, the narratives, the truths that you need to
live by so that you can break down all of
those invisible.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
Barriers and actually give.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
Yourself permission to go towards your big goal and I
don't know, feel great while you're doing it. So let's
dive into myth one. The first myth is that success
requires sacrifice. We've seen these narratives all over TV shows, movies,
the media, all this stuff that if you want to
(04:17):
be a top level executive, if you want to be
a booked and busy CEO, that you cannot have great relationships.
You have to sacrifice your well being.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
You need to have.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
All sorts of vices just to keep you going, and
you're gonna be burnt out all the time. This is
a lie. Gonna hear me say that a lot on
this episode. This is a lie. Success in and of
itself does not demand burnout. It does not demand you
to neglect your relationships, and it does not demand you
(04:49):
to sacrifice your well being.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Now, depending on what your.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Goals are, you need to design and build a life
where all of it works. That's not to say that
you're going to be one hundred percent in every single
area of your life all the time. But it is
to say that your relationships don't have to go down
to a zero in order for your business or your
(05:12):
career to be at a ten. Right, your well being
doesn't have to be at a one in order for
your career and your business to be at a ten.
I'm not sure why this narrative got placed into our society.
I mean, okay, maybe I am a little bit, but
we are not going to get into that today. What
we want to replace this lie with is that success
(05:35):
should be sustainable, it should be aligned, and it should
actually be life enhance it. Here's one of the things
I see a lot with people is that if their
business or career success is going up, their life enhancement
is going down. And the truth is, we actually want
both of those meters to be rising in equal measure.
(05:57):
They should be rising proportionately. Accesses going up, your life
enhancement should be going up.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
And the way that we do that is by building.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Sustainable and aligned businesses, careers, lives, relationships, well being, etc.
You probably heard me say this before, but I see
all of this like a big puzzle, and in order
for all of the pieces to work and actually create
the picture that you want.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
To be living.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
All of the pieces have to fit together, and they
all have to be from the same puzzle. I'm a
master puzzler, and I opened up a puzzle box the
other day and there was a piece in the puzzle
box that didn't.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
Go to that puzzle.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Did I spend hours trying to fit that piece into
the puzzle that it didn't belong in. No. I put
it back in the cabinet and was like, well, whenever
I figure out what puzzle this goes to, this will
go back in the box that it belongs in. But
it doesn't belong in this box. If you have a
piece of the puzzle right now that is in your
picture that doesn't belong there, it is up to you
(06:58):
to get rid of it. If that piece of the
puzzle that doesn't belong there for you is burnout or
neglecting relationships or sacrificing your well being, you have permission
to take that puzzle piece, throw it in the garbage.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Don't put it in the cabinet, throw it in the garbage.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
Success is meant to be sustainable, it is meant to
be life enhancing, it is meant to feel good.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Let's move on. To myth number two. I love this one.
Success is one size fits all.
Speaker 1 (07:29):
Everyone needs to be going after the same blueprint for success.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
This is so much bullshit. I know. It's really common.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
When we're growing up we see like, oh, well, if
I just have a six figure salary and a car
and a house and a white picket fence and two
point five children and all of this stuff, then I'll
be successful. I cannot count for you how many women
I have works with and spoken to that have all
aimed for that vision of success, all gotten there, looked
(08:01):
around and been like, this is it this This doesn't
feel right. This doesn't feel like I thought it was
going to feel. And that's because there is no one
size fits all.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
It's a lie. There is no universal blueprint for success.
What you want to replace.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
This myth with is success is personal, and I owe
it to myself to figure out what that means. Now,
this definition may change as you changed, So it's really, really,
really important to be in relationship with your definition of success.
This is not a set it and forget it thing.
(08:42):
This is a I've changed, I've evolved. Now, how does
my definition of success change and.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Evolve with me?
Speaker 1 (08:49):
A lot of you listening right now, know that I
relocated from Manhattan to Tulsa, Oklahoma during the pandemic on Tulsa, Oklahoma.
Was not my personal deafae mission of success. In fact,
Manhattan was my personal definition of success and it had
been for thirty five years. I moved to Tulsa holding
(09:10):
on to this definition that success was living in Manhattan,
and then I wasn't living in Manhattan.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
It was a problem.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
There was dissonance there, right, So I had to redefine.
I had to revisit my relationship with success to say, okay,
this was important to Youngbrie five year old Brie, ten
year old Brie, fifteen year old Brie Hell, thirty five
year old Brie. Is this still an important element of
(09:38):
my success?
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Or Can I live anywhere and do what I want
anywhere and enjoy.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
A completely different lifestyle here with now four years later,
my husband and experience success on a different level now,
the journey that I've had, I know no one else
that has had my journey. There is no one side
fits all. Last thing on this. I want to say,
y'all know I was a fashion designer. People still come
(10:05):
to me and say, three, I just need you to
take me shopping because I can't find anything on the
racks that fits me and fits me well. And I
say to them every single time, you do not need
me to take you shopping. What you need is a
good tailor. The sizing of our clothes is meant to
fit most people that.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Are of that size.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
However, if your proportions are different than the proportions that
they use to craft the pattern in the first place,
it's not going.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
To fit you.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Nothing is going to fit you, which means that instead
of this idea that I'm going to be able to
grab this blueprint and it's just going to fit me
again is a complete.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
Total, utter lie.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
In this vein of success, we don't want to grab
something off the rack and assume that it is going
to fit us what we need. We can take that
as a starting point, but then we need to take
that to a tailor and say, I have different proportions.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
One leg is longer than the other leg. Please help
me refine this to fit my body.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
The exact same process that you have to go through
for your definition of success.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
Mith three. This is one of my favorites.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
You have to eliminate fear to succeed I can't tell
you how many times people have said to me, like, Oh,
you're just so fearless. You do all of these things,
You've let you know, You've moved all over the world,
you've started all these businesses, you've done all these things.
You must be fearless. Fear is actually a natural experience,
and waiting to be fearless is keeping you stuck. So
(11:41):
I talk about all the time, I am not fearless.
What I have done is cultivated a very beautiful relationship
with my fear. Now, a lot of people experience fear
and back off and say this is not for me.
I experience fear, and I say, oh, interesting, why is
this emotion coming up for me right now? Oftentimes it's
(12:03):
because whatever I'm going up against is outside my comfort zone.
Because it's outside my comfort zone, fear is the natural
response to that. Fear is designed to keep us safe.
It's designed to keep us in our comfort zone so
that we don't do something that will harm us. So oftentimes,
if I'm experiencing fear, it's like, oh, I must be
(12:25):
expanding right now. When I invest in working with new coaches,
fear always comes up. I just bought a car last weekend,
and I'm sitting in the car saying to myself, I
know that I have nothing to be afraid of right now,
and yet my brain is.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
Like, what if you never get another client ever again?
Speaker 1 (12:46):
What proof do we have of that I'm about to
celebrate ten years in business. Does my brain have a
reason to say You're never gonna get another client ever again? Actually,
on the contrary, I'm about to sign my biggest client
who is enrolling at double the amount that I've ever
charged a private client before. When we step back and say,
(13:10):
why is this coming up for me right now? It
helps us build a healthy relationship with fear, rather than
just throwing fear the keys and being like, Okay, I'm done, you.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
Drive, I'm good, I'm good.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
Success comes as a result of taking action despite fear.
It's about linking arms with that fear and saying, I
know you're really scared right now. I know that this
step that I'm about to take feels really big. But
I promise got you, I've got us. We're gonna be okay.
(13:45):
And regardless if this action turns out exactly like I
think it's going to or not or better, we are
going to be okay. High achievers embrace fear when they're
going after their big, big goals. We're gonna take just
a quick quick break. I have a free resource for you,
(14:06):
and then we're gonna come back. I'm gonna give you
the last two myths and then a resource for you
to help you overcome a lot of these narratives in
your life. Pardon this quick interruption. One of the biggest
challenges ambitious entrepreneurs face is closing the gap between where
they are and their big, big goal. I've created a
(14:26):
resource for you that will help you navigate the journey
more easily defy reality. The Female Entrepreneur's Guide to Achieving
her audaciously ambitious goals will guide you through a process
to one hundred and ten percent claim the inevitability of
your big delusional goal, banish your doubts, and identify the
exact steps you need to take to defy reality. Visit
(14:50):
free sealy dot com slash free to get immediate access
to this tool that will help you stop wasting your
time so you can start defying reality. And now back
to your episode. Oh hello, welcome back. Okay, let's dive
into myth four. Success automatically leads to fulfillment. Now here's
(15:15):
what's so.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
Interesting about this.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
We can rack up late after accolade after accolade after accolade,
and still look at our lives and be like, I'm
not happy, I'm not fulfilled. Success doesn't lead to fulfillment.
Fulfillment leads to success. If we are always waiting for
(15:39):
external circumstances to guarantee us internal happiness, it's going to
be a long, cold, miserable road. We start with the
internal happiness, we start with the fulfillment, and when we
have that as a baseline, success gets to be the
whipped cream and the chair on top of an already
(16:01):
delicious Sunday. But if we don't have a baseline, and
our sunday dish is empty and we're trying to fill
it with all these outer things, and maybe we get
a success one day but not the next day, then
we're riding that roller coaster of I'm successful, I'm a failure,
I'm successful, I'm a failure because we are waiting for
external things to.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Tell us who the fuck we are. And I don't
know about you.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
I just got a new bracelet, this one right here,
and it says, remember who the fuck you are? My
external success happens as a result of my internal fulfillment
and happiness. And when we can do that, we develop
way more resiliency in our journeys because then if something
(16:46):
doesn't go the way we want it to go, it
doesn't derail us because we're already good. We've already got
a baseline within us. When we have that baseline, then
we get to say, oh, Okay, that didn't turn out
the way I wanted it to, And how to do
I pivot?
Speaker 2 (17:00):
How do I take the next step? How do I
keep going?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Because I feel fucking great and I'm ready to achieve
this big goal I have. I don't need to wait
for external markers to tell me that I'm successful with this.
I need to have that baseline happiness and fulfillment as
my internal guidance and let myself continue showing up in
that state, taking steps, and that external success is going
(17:26):
to come. The inner leads to the outer, not the
other way around. All right, final myth myth five Failure
is the opposite of success.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Oh, this one's so good too.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
We think that it's an either or either I succeeded
or I failed. What I found is really interesting, especially
in the last ten years of running this business is
that the failure success conversation is not an either or conversation.
It's a spectrum conversation. So it's not one hundred percent
(18:01):
success in zero percent failure or one hundred percent failure
in zero percent success. Most of the experiences we have
lies somewhere in the middle. Maybe it was a seventy
percent failure and a thirty percent success, or a fifty
to fifty or an eighty twenty. Because when we go
into this place where this was one hundred percent failure
(18:23):
and a zero percent success, it really limits our ability
to then move into our next steps or our next phases.
When I shut down my fashion business, that's immediately where
I went, even though I knew that I was being guided,
that my steps were actually in alignment, that I was
(18:43):
being called to make a change that would bring me
the happiness and fulfillment that I was looking for. When
we are at one hundred percent failure point and we're
trying to get to one hundred percent success point, that
is a big gap. So what I did was I
started looking, but all of the areas where yes, could
I have done better in that business? There are absolutely
(19:05):
things that I could have done better, but even that
learning in and of itself meant that it wasn't a failure.
There were also a lot of things that I did
really fucking well in that business, and I was able
to recognize, like, wow, I did a lot of press placements.
I dressed celebrities. I sold to some of the largest
(19:27):
e commerce platforms that exist in our country, and I
did all of that mostly without help. I built on
my own websites, I did on my own bookkeeping. All
of the business skills that I gained in that business
over the course of eight years are what has allowed
me to be in this business for ten years, helping
(19:47):
other women build multiple six and seven figure businesses for themselves.
So if I were to look at that experience and
just write it off as a failure, that would completely
negate a huge part of my journey. That has been
the stepping stone for me to get to this point
and for me to continue building and growing this business
even after my ten year birthday mark. Hey oh, I
(20:11):
even saw the guy who launched dollar per month shave
clob talks about this as well. I saw an interview
with him years and years and years ago as I
was getting ready to write my book Permission to Leap,
And he talked about how he had a business prior
to that that ended terribly. It was a huge failure
and if he hadn't done that business, dollar per month
(20:34):
shave club would not exist.
Speaker 2 (20:36):
I want you to start thinking about.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
This failure success again as more of a spectrum and
as less of a black and white yes or no.
One hundred percent failure or one hundred percent success. Its
failure and success the power of the and it is
both give yourself permission to look back at your failures
(20:59):
and see what were the successes within that failure and
how were they data points for me to continue stepping
through my drink. The problem with a lot of these
myths and these beliefs is that oftentimes they are deeply
ingrained in our subconscious.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
Now, if you know anything about the.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
Brain, you know that on average, your conscious mind is
only about five percent of what you can access up
your brain on any given day. That means ninety five
percent of your brain you cannot access consciously. All these
myths that we just talked about, if there was one
where you were like you were preaching to the choir,
(21:42):
there's a very strong likelihood that that belief has been
ingrained in you for multiple decades. And if that is
the case, it is very likely in your subconscious. Personally,
I use hypnotherapy to get into my subconscious to be
able to shift to those narratives and shift those patternings.
(22:02):
I like to think of our brains as like multiple
super highways. The number of neurons and pathways and things
moving through our brains at all times. The amount of
information processes is so immense that if we can only
access five percent of that, we are trying to deploy
an atomic bomb. But really we're just throwing one of
(22:23):
those like little popper things that you throw at at
the fourth of July that just goes right, very very
very different. So, if you want to make some strides
on a subconscious level with some of these myths so
that you can move forward and remove those invisible barriers
that we were talking about earlier, I'm going to be
(22:44):
launching some thirty day hypnosis programs to help you clear
out these beliefs so that you can program your mind
for sustainable success. The way I like to think about
this is you click update on your iOS system, on
your operating system, on your laptop, on your phone, on
all your devices. All the time, you're constantly upgrading the
(23:06):
operating system. But when is the last time you upgrade
to the operating system? To your mind, these thirty day
hypnosis programs are not only going to help you do that,
They're going to give you accountability for thirty days. I'm
going to be in your inbox, checking in with you
for thirty days to help you make these shifts. Because
for ambitious individuals with big goals, it is just so
(23:28):
so so important for us to have tools that we
can use to clear these things within ourselves and really
truly upgrade our operating systems so that we can move
more quickly towards our goals. So these are not released yet,
I'm giving you kind of like an early preview of
what is coming. If you would like access to these
prior to them being released early access with some special discounts,
(23:53):
go to breseealy dot com slash hypnosis and you can
sign up to be notified when we release these programs.
In closing, I just want to encourage you to reflect
on which of these myths that you've been carrying and
living by, and I want to invite you to take
this as an opportunity to put it down, to let
it go, to walk away. Let's use this as a
(24:15):
moment where we hit the reset button and say, I
don't want those. I don't want those to control me anymore.
I don't want those to set my trajectory. I don't
want those to be invisible barriers that I just can't see.
This is an invitation for you to take the next
step in truly upgrading your operating system so you can
go to bre sealy dot com slash hypnosis. Also, don't
(24:37):
forget to visit bri sealy dot com slash community and
get access to over one thousand amazing women who are
Big Goal Energy women. Thank you, thank you, thank you
for joining me for this episode of Big Goal Energy.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
Make sure you're subscribed. Feel free to.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
Send this episode to a friend who might need it.
Big hugs and I will see you all on next
week's episode. Thank you for joining us on this episode
of Big Goal Energy. We trust that it fueled your
ambition and made you feel seen. We are a community
of ambitious female entrepreneurs like you. Come join us in
the Big Goal Energy community by visiting brecaly dot com
(25:13):
slash community In the meantime, send your questions for us
to cover in the episodes to info at bresealy dot com. Together,
we'll turn your audacious dreams into remarkable achievements. Cheers to
defying reality. See you on the next episode.
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