Chapter 12: Sam Kieffer: 'Have Gratitude, Stupid.'

'Enemy in Paris' podcast host Sam Kieffer joins the BFFs to discuss his fear of teenagers, confusing everyone at Comic Con, and what it's like to be so bad at an instrument that your instructor refuses to teach you. Emily reveals how to win David Hasselhoff's affection, Haley creates an incredible new phrase to live by, and everyone confesses their love for one another. So grab your sweat spray, buy a porcelain cat, and have Elijah Wood sign your chest as you enjoy Chapter 12 of 'How To Make It With Emily & Haley.'

For more adventures with Emily & Haley, follow us on Instagram: @howtomakeitpodcast where you'll find video clips from this episode, mini-episode clips, and more random nonsense.

Follow Emily: @emilydorothyy
Follow Haley: @haleymuralee

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Hi, I'm Emily and Dime Hayley. After meeting online, we became international
best friends who bonded over how hardit is to find success in the entertainment
industry. Join us and our celebrityco authors as they help us write the
book on how to make it and, more importantly, uncover what making it

(00:22):
even means. You know, say, and we met online sounds a lot
sexier than it actually is. Emily, you don't think it's clear we met
on a networking site? No,I think it sounds very much like I
swiped right on you, my friend. Would you like to meet a British
person online site? We're going tohave to do this again now, aren't
we. Yes. Hi, myname is Sam Keefer and I wanted to

(00:57):
be a comic book artist when Igrew up. Oh, oh that's so
cool. No, you still don'tat this point fail. Yeah, it
was something that I was really reallyinterested in when I was a kid.
And then I'm just not good atdrawing. And before before, the response

(01:18):
when I say that is always well, you can take classes. True,
true, but you have to haveclasses only work if you have talent underneath
it. Because I took like artclasses when I was younger, and I'm
just bad. I'm just bad atdrawing. It's just not in the cards
for me. Yeah, I know. And every couple of years I'll pick
it back up and like get afresh sketch bat and I'm terrible. I'm

(01:41):
just awful. I'm trying to thinkif there's a solution. No, there
isn't. It's just something that Ican't be. I can't draw and I
can't sing, which are both thingsthat I really admire and other people,
but I just can't do it.There's a I don't know where it started,
if it's YouTube or whatever, sinceI'm so into YouTube now, but

(02:01):
there's a sketch thing where people sendin stories and then this artist does this
stick figure thing and tells the storiesand it's to like weird auto tune and
it's so funny. But you couldbe like one of those ironic artists who's
urt, Okay, here's the thing. You're doing that thing that I warned
you not to do, which peopledo when you tell that story, which

(02:22):
is you're building up my talent level. It's not there, it's not.
I can't I can't draw ironically.I can't sing ironically I'm just bad.
I'm just bad at it. Doyou a thing? Do you have like
a doodle that you do? Like, you know if people have like a
yeah, no, no I don'tokay, Hayley, do you have a
doodle? I do a stuff Iused to draw. I used to draw

(02:49):
the stussy s. Yes, yeah, because it's it. That's just satisfying
for the user to draw when youconnect those two final lines. Oh,
that feels so good, especially ifyou have add or ADHD it's or OCD.
It's so satisfying when you complete thatdrawing. Yeah, okay, so
that was that. Trump sends consonanceas well that everyone loves doing that.

(03:14):
Yeah, right, where did thatcome from? What was then? No
idea? I thought it was yourend. I think it was. I
think it was a company here,like a snowboarding company. I want to
say. Maybe I feel like I'mlying or feel like I'm making this up
so the s looks like the snowboardingcompany logo. But I don't know if
that's who. I don't know ifsome middle schooler one day did it and

(03:37):
then everybody was like everyone was likeyeah shit, well yeah, I like
to imagine that kid drawing it.And everyone. It's like the first time
they heard Beethoven play. Everyone justlosing their minds, being like, well,
dude, you got to come inhere. Come. I was I
was running an errand the other dayand there must be a school nearby where
I was going, and there wasa deli and kids, these kids,

(03:57):
probably middle schoolers, were having lunchand they were all on their phones and
they could have been inventing the nextweird doodle that everybody comes up with,
but they were all too busy notspeaking to each other. Yeah, that's
my nightmare, by the way,is groups of middle schoolers. That's nothing
more intimidating. I'll cross the streetif I see them coming. Yeah.

(04:18):
I thought I was the only one, but I'm still no, no,
no, I got to do theythink I'm cool? Yeah, exactly.
Well one, I'm five six,so they're all as tall as me.
So it's like a weird like emasculating, like I'm forty and here comes a
seventeen year old that's got five incheson me. I don't need that in
my day. Haley, what's theequivalent of middle school in the UK?

(04:38):
I don't know. So middle schoolwould be like it'd be like eleven to
fourteen. Yeah, so they're primary, they're at high school. They're at
high school three seven, which isaround eleven twelve until like Harry Potter until

(05:00):
Yeah. Yeah, just like HarryPottery. Everything in the UK is just
like in Harry Potter, especially inthe North of England especially. That's exactly
how it is. That's exactly howit is. Going back to the original
point though, guys and taking usaway from Harry Potter for a moment.
Yeah, I think it's admirable somethat you kind of get where your limitations

(05:29):
are. I think there's a skillin itself. It's like no one to
quit. Yeah, not everything isachievable for every person. Moving to our
random facts section. Okay, that'sright. I'm excited for this. So
I'm wondering as an American who recordsa podcast with someone in Europe, I

(05:53):
know that you host a podcast withsomeone in Europe. And my question,
my question isn't like anything other thanwhat is it that makes it so magical
recording with someone who's in Europe?What is that secret chemistry? Well,
I think it's I think it's acombination of the two accents together or it's

(06:14):
always very fun. Yes, sayingsomething and getting a British person to laugh
is very, very fulfilling. Itfeels very very good. It feels like
you've like sold out the Apollo.M hm, Hayley, do you agree
with that? Absolutely, That's that'swhat I feel all the time. Well,

(06:36):
because British people don't give laughs outeasily. There, it's not a
laugh filled country. It's very theydon't. We're very miserable. Head.
Yeah, exactly. How did youtwo meet? Instagram yep. One of
the few examples of the Internet beingused correctly. I was on a show

(07:00):
called Office Ladies, which is anoffice recap show here in the US,
and the show Emily in Paris cameup, which I despise with a passion,
and I just jumped on Mike andverbally vomited for like three solid minutes
about how much I hated Emily,how bad the show was, and a

(07:23):
bunch of people like I'm not kidding, and I say, like a thousand
people dem oh my god. Sothat I like tapped into this, like
nothing unites people more than hatred ofa common cause. And she was one
of them. She emailed me andshe was like, Hey, I'm a
comic and I was also familiar withher comedy in La I'd seen her flip
charts. She's very, very funny. OK. So we just stuck up

(07:46):
a conversation. And then last Novembershe hosts the main stage at the Brussels
Comic con the big comic book conventionthere. She's one of the hosts,
like when they bring the people onstage and just chat with them, She's
one of those people. And JohnClaude van Dam was there and I was
like, yeah, yeah, exactly, yeah, exactly, So like it

(08:09):
was so so random that John Claudevan Dam would be in Brussels. So
I emailed her and I was like, that's incredible, and she's like,
well, you can come if youwant, I can get you, you
can meet him, you can bebackstage. And I was like, yep,
I'm going to take you up onthat. So I flew to Brussels
and we met and we hung out, and then we went to Paris and
London and I stayed with her andher husband and then came home. And

(08:31):
then when we were in Paris,she pitched the idea of doing Emily and
Paris hate watch podcast called Enemy inParis Love Oh my gosh, yeah,
my my. My two facts werebetween were between that and then the the
pictures of you with the with theLord of the Rings. Yeah, that

(08:54):
would be the comic cause yeah,because yeah, yeah, because I oh
my gosh, I love one ofthe rings. But oh man, I
don't know if you can see holdon, I get all the signed Funko
pops of the Lord of the Ringspeople. Oh my god. Yeah,
that's a lot that is. Yeah, I know, yeah, I'm definitely

(09:16):
forty. There was. I'm notcriticizing it. I'm just making it a
little bit. There was a woman. There was a woman at Warner Brothers
where I would have to go toget cast drive on passes, and she
had a wall of funko pops.Sure, And I kid you not,
Like I'd come back like probably oncea week I'd go walk over there and

(09:41):
it would multiply to the point wherethe morn sitting next to her, it
was like he added him on hisdesk from her. Yeah. They're one
of those things that once people findout you like, they just give you.
Like did you ever have a collectionof something as a kid that you
didn't even really like but you gotone of and you said thank you.

(10:01):
Must use you must have said thankyou too heartily, and so everyone started
giving you. Like when I wasa kid, I had no joke,
probably sixty porcelain cats because I becauseI got I got one when I was
like five or six and must havereally really been excited about it. So
for the next decade, I remember, at like age sixteen, telling my
family being like, that's enough withthe cats. It's not something I collect.

(10:24):
Stop. Yeah, I actually havemugs really, yeah, yeah,
I have no idea, no idea. I think this is a thing that
women do. It's it's like ifyou don't if you know some a woman
but you don't know her that well, but you know we're well enough that
you need to get her a gift. Yes, it's a mug. Okay,

(10:46):
it's a mug that has like somelike you phrase on it, like
Sleigh or a seasonal Christmas mug.I had, Yeah, so many mugs.
For me. It's either people getme. I mean, I'm literally
wearing a Disney shot right now.But and to the point where I'm like,
please, they know one thing aboutme. They're like, oh,

(11:09):
she likes going to Disneyland, andso then I have like a mini mouse
apron and cooking utensils, and I'mlike, I'm never gonna have someone over
because I don't want anyone to eversee this. Yeah, yep, it's
easy how other people will or it'sweird how easily other people will decide you're
a fan of something and be like, she loves mugs, she's a big
mug. Heead and you're like,my guess, so, Sam, if

(11:31):
what would you want people to giftyou endlessly? Oh wow, that's such
a good question, I believe besideslike cash instruments, maybe, oh maybe,
I guess. Yeah, I guess. I have a couple of guitars
and a cello that I am verybad at. I was gonna that was

(11:54):
I had three facts and one wasgonna be the cello, because I remember
that from an episode of podcasts.Yes, so I have been taking cello
lessons for three years. I amworse than when I started. I am
not kidding. I've made zero progress. My teacher quit on me. I
like, stop teaching me. Ihad to get a different teacher in the

(12:18):
same school because I wasn't progressing.Ye specifically, they quit on you specific
yep. Wow. I went inone day and I was like, I'm
here for a lesson with so andso. And they were like, oh
they've What did they say, They'vedeclined your presence or something like that,
something really brutal but written in alike real heartfelt way. They're like,
oh, they've declined your invitation.You'll be with so and so today.

(12:39):
And I walked in. It wasthis guy. I know. I was
that frustrating. And here's the thingI'm I practice. I'm just so awful
at it. I once had amassuse decline. Really, so they saw
you and they're like, no,I'm not touching you. My call to
make it a appointment. And theycalled me back and they were like,

(13:03):
I'm sorry, she doesn't want tomassage you anymore. Why what were you
doing during? I did? Okay, what was you like? This feels
like there's a backstory here. Whatwere you doing this? I'm on her
side. I don't know what happened. I don't know what happened. Yeah,

(13:24):
and I was. I remember becauseI was with my friend when it
happened. And I turned to herand I was like, she just said
she doesn't want to massage me anymore. Like first she was like, I'm
she broke up with you. Yeah, and my friend was like, I
truly don't know. My friend isa hairstylist, and she was trying to
think of from like the point ofview of like someone who provides a service,

(13:46):
and she was like, I don'tYeah, anyway, Haley, what
would you like to be gifted endlessly? Endlessly? It can't be money?
Silence. That's such a British You'reyou're perfect, You are perfect. I

(14:07):
couldn't script you any better. Justbeing left alone, being unbothered. My
god, that's days off. Yeah, the dream. So I've just been
stalking back on Instagram and we've gota few mutual friends, which is quite
interesting. Yeah, man, we'reall we're all just related here in the

(14:28):
UK. Yeah. She said,it's a pretty like small comedy scener like
performing scene there. Yeah, yeah, it very much? Is it very
much? Is I'm going to moveus on to Yeah, okay, because
we're My mom told me I haveto ask more follow up questions and I
think I nailed it. No,Yeah, you crushed that. Oh my
god, that topic was thoroughly mind. It's beautiful, beautiful. So you

(14:56):
have a love of going to conventionsand you've gotten to meet some incredible artists
through your work in podcasting and throughyour love of this. So, who
is one person you've met, eitherlike randomly or planned that you genuinely kind
of felt a loss of words with. This is going to be very very

(15:18):
specific. There is a an eightiesAmerican wrestler named Rowdy Roddy Piper. Oh
my God, and Rowdy Roddy Piper'sthing was he wore a kilt. He
was in the movie They Live.He He's the one he coined the phrase
I'm here to kick ass and chewbubble gum and I'm all out of bubblegum.
That's that's Rowdy Roddy Viper. Hehe he was like he was a

(15:43):
heel, so he was like thefirst, like one of the first wrestling
bad guys. So it was hisjob to come out. He would like
insult the audience, like there's thefamous footage of him in Chicago. He
would like just point at the crowdand be like, I see a lot
of sweaty, out of work,fat Americans and people getting riled up.
And then Hulk Hogan would come infor USA and hit him with a chair

(16:03):
and defeat him. But he camein. He came in once and recorded
one podcast with us, and thenhe died the next He died like two
weeks after that. But he camein. Yeah, Hulk Cogan killed him.
Oh my, I don't even knowwhy I'm laughing. I know it's
not very but no, no,no, yeah, uh no, I

(16:26):
think he I think cancer might open. Yeah, but he but he came
in. Well, yeah, itwas definitely Okay, it was definitely.
I know it was complications due toa lifetime of being a professional wrestler.
So I'm sure. I'm sure itwas heart failure or something like that.
But he came in. And thething, the reason it stuck out in

(16:48):
my mind is the answer to yourquestion was he was. So he's the
nicest person I've ever met out ofthe thousands of people I've met, and
I've met some really nice I don'tO'Brien super sweet. Jenna n Angel from
the office are very sweet. Buthe I remember when we finished, I
have the audio somewhere he so thatwe he finished his podcast and then he
turned to me on Mike and waslike, Hey, I just want to

(17:11):
say I appreciate you being here.I appreciate you doing what you do.
He's like, this company couldn't runwithout you, and like it like just
like built me up and like broughttears to my eyes and thanked me for
coming to work that day, forjust doing my job. We'd never met
or anything. So then afterwards Iwas like, heyn, could I get
a picture? And he's like yeah, and gave me his World Wrestling Federation

(17:33):
Championship ring to put on. I'msorry, well yeah, He's like here,
put this on, and like bearhugged me and like was just so
so sweet and so nice and thenyeah and then passed away. Oh my
goodness, that was all he neededto do. He was, yeah,
yeah, he was. He wasliterally like an angel on earth. He
was this guy and it was justmade all the more better by knowing what

(17:56):
his job was. His job wasto be evil and rile people up and
like get the audience to hate him. So to like to be that wonderful
in his free time, I thoughtwas really nice. I was just gonna
say, have you always been awrestling fan? Then are you a wrestling
nerd? Not a nerd, Iwould say, I'm a health, a
healthy, straight white guy, ageeighteen to forty love of eighties wrestling.

(18:19):
That was I was, Yeah,that was the exact time period. I
was a kid in for Randy Savageand Hulk Hogan And yeah, yeah I
heard that that Roddy Piper and HulkCogan didn't get on in real life.
No, you're thinking of Macho Man, Randy Savage and hul koch Am.

(18:41):
I they hate each other in reallife. Yes, right, that's one
of my Yeah getting together, you'rewrestlers together. Sorry you stumbled across.
That's one of my favorite like informationaltidbits is like, uh so they they
because they've a couple of times inthe last like every two or three years,
they'll try and get the band backtogether for charity. They'll try and

(19:03):
get like everyone back. And uhmetro Man, I think he passed away
a couple of years ago, buthe wouldn't do it for years. He
wouldn't do it because he hated HulkHogan. I like hated him in real
life, and Hulk Hogan didn't hatematro Man so much. But like there's
just there's like there's all this footageyou can see online of them reaching out
to Randy Savage and him being likeyou tell hul Cogan if I see him,

(19:26):
he's dead. Just stuff like that. We were like Jesus Christ,
like, yeah, oh yeah,I'm on the wrong wrestler completely. Yeah,
you want to look up Macho ManRandy Savage. That's who you want.
That's who you want, Haley,that's who you want. Yeah,
okay, I like that. Ilike the Rock because he was in Molana.
He was. Yeah, your wrestlingknowledge is fantastic. Wow, deep

(19:51):
cuts. It ends there. I'mgoing to take us back to Enemy in
Paris if that's okay. Okay,So for those people listening who haven't listened

(20:12):
to Enemy in Paris, it's ahate watch podcast that goes episode by episode
through the Netflix series Emily in Paris, and it's been it's been very popular
since you it's been really well received. Yeah. Yeah, last year I
underestimated the I just tapped into thislevel of hate that was under the surface

(20:33):
for a lot of people pretty completely. By the way, Well, that
leads into my question, which isI'm always fascinated by when you hear people
who found success in some area andthey're like, oh, we were just

(20:53):
you know, friends having fun togetheror whatever, and I'm always like,
shoot, I try so hard toorchestrate things to be successful. It doesn't
work. So I'm wondering if thisshow, which I think you may have
just answered, was just like afun idea and you had no plans for
it to be like this huge thing. Yeah, that was exactly it.

(21:17):
It's too much to your detriment,that is what happened. Yeah, it
was just something where I hate thisshow with such a passion it bothers me.
Just talking about it now makes meso irritated. Just thinking of Emily
Cooper gets me so upset. Ithink Beck noticed that, and Beck thought
that was funny, and she's like, yeah, people will listen to that.

(21:37):
So we recorded one and dropped itand it just blew up. So
would you ever try to get LilyCollins? Oh here's the thing. Okay,
So in the most recent episode,have you seen Emily in Paris a
bit of it? Yeah? Ihave. Yeah, there's a designer on
the show, and this guy namedPierre Cadeau, who's this older French.
We had him on the podcast.So somebody reached out. Somebody a fan

(22:03):
of ours, these wonderful people namedJilda and Mitchew in Paris, reached out
to us, and they were like, hey, we're childhood friends with him,
if you want to have lunch withhim, and we were like,
yep, yes we do, sowe and we during lunch we were like,
you know, the show's making funof Emily and Paris and he was
like yeah, I know. Uh, and we're like can we interview and
he was like yeah, so we'reWe're definitely. I definitely think at this

(22:25):
point I know the show's aware ofthe podcast, so that's that's fascinating to
me. I really hope. Iwould love to have Lily Collins on.
I would love to interview her asEmily and just tear into her and just
be like, what is your fuckingbrother? This is the wrestling feud of
twenty twenty four. Yeah, exactly, it's me and Emily Cooper. Oh

(22:47):
man. I mean the thing immediatelybecause I'm a long distance runner and when
I see someone after a run andthey're like whoo and they look like,
you know, with a full fromthat moment on and I think that's the
opening. Yes. I was like. When I was in Brussels Comic Con
this year, a fan of thepodcast found me and gave me she made

(23:07):
these custom stickers and one of themsays I just ran five miles on it.
It says enemy impairs at bottom,but I just ran five miles.
Yeah. That's a reoccurring theme inthe show is Emily will go for a
run in July in muggy Paris andjust her boobs will be sweaty. That's
it. Everything else her makeup isfine. You gotta yep. Yeah,

(23:29):
you can tell it's guys doing thethis sweat spraying on the show. That's
exactly how I look after a room. Yeah. Well it's not just that
after she has sex. Everything she'sflawless. She's never her hair's never messed
up. Well, you know,I'm an intimacy coordinator, Sam, so
I carry around sweat spray with meeverywhere. Really where do you Where do
you spray? First? Well,it very much depends on the what's going

(23:55):
on? Okay, in the moment, what's the most commonplace? Yeah,
I was gonna say average chest head, Yeah that's it. So for Emily
would just be chested and then makeup retouching on the shoulders nice, Okay,
Yeah, you can love a goodsweaty shoulder. Yeah, shoulders are
good even though like, yeah,it feels odd, but like on camera
it looks nice. Yeah. Andyeah, meanwhile, I have paper towels

(24:21):
stuck to my head during a businesswhich I think you sold that story off,
Mike. Oh, that now makesno sense. What Yeah, Emily,
you guys, I did an entirebusiness dinner with a piece of paper
towels stuck to my forehead and thenI had no idea. That's it.
Yep, that's it. That wasvery concise for you. Should I move

(24:41):
on, Emily? You take itand move on. Cool. So I
wanted to talk to you some aboutsocial media and troodcasting. It just seems
to be a necessary requirement nowadays tobe constantly active on social media brow any
business really, but like especially apodcast from the video footage kind of sits

(25:06):
hand in hand. Do you everget burnout or like any kind of overseas?
Yeah? Oh absolutely Yeah. Imean I've been doing this non stop
for eleven years. All I've beendoing is making podcasts. I've made probably
ten thousand of them. So yeah, burnout's a real thing, and you're
doing the same thing over and over. It never ends, there's never I

(25:29):
mean, some shows do seasons andthey'll take little breaks, but most shows,
it's just every week. It justnever ends, so like it just
goes until it's not popular anymore.So yeah, that level of dropping an
episode and then having to engage withfans, I shouldn't say having to get
to engage with fans is really reallynice, but yeah, it can be
really draining. Like I have atimer set on my phone where like I

(25:51):
can only go on it like anhour a day because otherwise I'm just on
it all day every day. It'ssuch an easy hole to fall into,
isn't it. Yeah, And thevideos didn't always used to be a part
of podcasts. That was something Iremember. I remember eight or nine years
ago at Earwolf they tried they calledit like the VPN Video podcast Network,
and no one. No one wantedit, no one cared, no one

(26:15):
would pay the extra dollar for it. Now when there's just because it's an
audio medium, so people can gowhere can I watch it? And you
go, you can't. You justlisten to it, And people are like,
that doesn't compute. I need tosee it. Yeah all the time.
You get that a lot. AndI also think like it depends right
cause if you're I mean, Ilove our show, but if you're SmartLess

(26:36):
and you're those guys. It's likelike the people will listend no matter what,
And I'm like, we want peopleto get to know Haley and myself,
and so you do need that bitof of video engagement. Otherwise it's
like I just people just don't have. Yeah, And the shitty thing is
the whole point of podcasts at thebeginning was it was something you could come

(26:56):
in and do in your sweatpants andyou didn't have to be on TV.
You didn't have to look good.You could just be relaxing at home.
So now that that's gone, that'sa whole nother level of like, well
damn it. Yeah, I learnedhow I was signing up for. Yeah,
I learned I have to tell peoplethat we record because I find women

(27:18):
especially are like, oh like yeah, we're recording. Yeah. Yeah.
Then I'm like, oh shit,is that do I? Do? They
feel tricked like I? Yeah?And then you get such like like some
podcast video stuff is so beautifully shortat the cinematography is beautiful. At what
point does it cease to be apodcast? Yeah? And at what point

(27:42):
does did someone have an unfair advantageover your podcast because they have three cameras
and a video editor that can switchin between where I mean, well,
I meanwhile, it's just you andyou're at home and your laptop cutting it
up, trying to life. Yeah, I feel like, but yeah,
that's when I went to see Conan. The way we got Sona on the
show was I went to see Conanat Serious Live. It's this tiny little

(28:06):
room. I don't know if yeah, at the yes, yeah, oh
my god. I'm so used topeople recording at home. Yeah, and
I'm like, there's this building.So we went and there were probably fifty
people there, and when he wasasking how far everyone had traveled, my
apartment building was actually attached to theSerious building. As people, yeah,

(28:27):
people in LA were like, Icame from you know, Alta, Dina,
like thinking that's really far, andConan was hoping they'd say they came
from like Chica, yeah, orTokyo or something. So as places were
getting closer and closer, I justraised my hand and that was like,
my apartment building is like literally attached. And so we did this whole bit.

(28:47):
And then when he sat down andbecause it was such a small space
and it was him and a guest, and he was like we are doing
video. I'm interviewing a guest ona stage. We are back where I
started with my talk show. Yeah, I left the talk show to do
the podcast. Yep. Now we'redoing it in front of a live audience
with a camera. Yeah. Nowhe just needs a band. Yeah,

(29:10):
yes, yeah, that's what hesaid. And then of course Ed Sheeran
was a guest, so he waslike, shit, oh really, Yeah,
we've come full circle. Yeah.I don't really know. I can't
really tell which direction it's going,but I definitely think it's nice that people
are actually listening to stuff instead ofi don't know, hopefully getting educated in

(29:33):
some way or hating a show together. Yeah, I would take an hour
long podcast over a topic rather thanwatching something on TikTok and getting my information
from there. So podcasts are atleast a little more thought out and usually
I'm saying usually usually more researched andwell designed and more informative. Yes,
we have top researchers on yeah,I can tell. Yes, this background

(29:57):
on me has been extensive thanks ourfirst our first random fact. We introduced
it when we were interviewing my friendRyan George. He does YouTube videos,
and it's like you wore a sweaterwith flowers on it on this date And
it was like way too specific andhe was like what, Yeah, so

(30:18):
we've since broadened, but yeah,it used to be like where were you
on the night of Yeah, thisis your blood type? Was your fact?
Yeah? Yeah, yeah, thisis how many cavities you have?
Yeah, you ran a red lightin December of twenty eighteen. What was
that about? So I'm gonna moveus into the story section, sure,

(30:48):
and I will start by telling astory. Usually, because Haley's on set,
she tells the stories, but Iremembered one, so I'm going to
tell my story. So it's Iwas working at Warner Brothers and we needed
to switch a dressing room with anactor that was there. And so I

(31:10):
went to the PA that was onthe other show and I was like,
I needed to do a favor formy show. Can we swap these dressing
rooms? And he was like,no, we really can't. This person's
like a really big star and itturned out to be David Hasselhoff, Okay,
and I was like, oh,sure, Like let David Hasselhoff keep
his dressing room. Yeah, Andso then I was like, but I

(31:33):
really now, I really want tomeet David Hasselhoff. So I was like,
how can I like impress, likedo something to impress to get to
meet David Hasselhoff. Sure. Andso I was walking by a random soundstage
and I saw that there were energydrinks sitting out, so I ran over

(31:53):
and I stole an energy drink.I don't even remember from what show.
It was part of the set,So I like went in, I grabbed
an energy drink, and then Ibrought it to David Hasselhoff, and he
was so thrilled that he gave mea signed T shirt that says, oh,
I actually have it right here.Yeah please, Okay, it says
don't hassle the Hoff. Uh huh. It's one of my prize possessions.

(32:17):
So the point of that being thatsometimes we do crazy things in order to
try and advance our careers. I'mnot really sure how I was trying to
advance my career getting David Hasselhoff tolike me. Maybe he would have smelled
potential and like been like, let'smake this show about you instead. But
I'm just wondering, Sam, ifyou've ever had an experience in your career

(32:40):
where you've been in a situation whereyou're like, what the hell am I
doing? Just in order to advancemyself? That made you go what the
hell am I doing? Yes,I remember standing on the balcony of Earwolf
looking out into like the sunset andjust going what am I doing with my
life? Earwolf was a very smallpodcast company. It was like four of

(33:00):
us. This is like twelve yearsago. It was like three or four
of us in a rented office spacewith the horrible reverb. And then we
got bought by a company and movedinto these bigger studios. Then we got
bought by another company, so webuilt our own studio and this was a
beautiful studio. This was when wedesigned. The engineers sat down and planned

(33:22):
it out like it was designed todo podcasts in. It was like a
larger room that we could record bandsin. It was great. Then we
got bought by SiriusXM, and Iremember I remember knowing something bad was going
to happen because we got bought andwe all hopped on this zoom with like
two thousand people of that now workat ZEROSXM, and the the CEO of

(33:45):
Serious XM going, hey, wejust acquired Earwolf, and we all waved
our hands and they went, andI remember her saying, we don't want
to change anything about what you do, which is a dead giveaway. Something's
going to change. That's like akiss of death. Why would they keep
our studio open when they have theCerus XM building which you've been to,
which is huge and beautiful and brandnew. So for a year we just

(34:08):
worked out of that studio and justwhen I was like, oh man,
I think we're staying here, wegot this email that was like, hey,
we are shutting your studio down.We're going to be shutting it down
next July, so that's like ninemonths to prepare, and we're like all
right. So then we got anemail like a week later that was like,
hey, sorry, not July May, and we were like all right.

(34:30):
So now it's November and we getan email that was like, oh,
sorry, Christmas is when we're shuttingyour studio down. So we had
we had, So we had twentyfive days to tear this studio down.
Our all of our backup, ourbig file backup, was on this machine
called a Drobo, which is justa bunch of hard drives. It's just
a big mass storage giant terabytes ofinformation that had a decade's worth of Earwolf

(34:54):
podcasts on it, and a couplemonths into serious I needed to get something
off of there. So I emailedthem and I was like, Hey,
what happened to Drobo? I needto get a file off there? And
they're like, yeah, we gotrid of that. We trashed that,
and I was like, well,you can't trash it. That's ten years
of Earwolf, Like that's my careeris like on this machine. And they're

(35:16):
like, yeah, we couldn't getit to work, so we threw it
away. So I remember hanging upthe phone and like standing yeah, like
staring at the sunset, being likewhat am I doing with my life?
Like I lost ten years worth ofpodcasts that are like big podcasts, like
years worth of how did This Getmade? And comedy bang bang? That's

(35:37):
what I was just gonna ask you. Is that why I can't listen to
anyone? Yeah? So there's abunch of a bunch of old ear Wolf
stuff. I think how did thisget made? Is fine? I think
they backed their stuff. They're doingthey're now doing matinee mondays where they re
release it's like Taylor's version, likere releasing everything. But I had the

(35:57):
ear Wolf app yes, I was, I had my premium whatever, and
then one day it was like ehand I was like yep, yeah,
yep. So then a bunch ofold you know, like Ron and Beverly
or Professor blast off these smaller showsthey're just gone. They're just gone,
like they just don't exist anymore.They're just lost to the sands of time.

(36:17):
But yeah, that was that wasa very like I remember, I
remember. I remember the next morningbeing like do I want to go to
work? Why do Why am Idoing this? If nothing is permanent?
Yeah, it's brutal. I meanthat almost. I keep saying this during
this interview, but I was stuckbetween two questions and one of them was
going to be kind of the impermanenceof the jobs that we've all chosen in

(36:42):
that like, yeah, if it'spodcasting, TVs, movies, if it's
writing, if it's whatever, Likeit's this weird game of django where people
always say like it goes back tonetwork or whatever, but even network people
can lose their jobs in a second. So it's just this, like how
do you grab people with this?You could write on a show for ever

(37:04):
and then just be replaced. Oryou can make this thing and then it's
gone. There's content create. Likehow do you you like to think that
you're not replaceable even though we allknow we are. Yeah. Like I
was laid off from Serrus XM inJanuary, and being laid off was fine.
I'd worked for the company ten years, It's fine. But the way
I was laid off was so sofast and so brutal. I woke up

(37:27):
one day and on the shared calendarthat we all use, it just said
off boarding. There was a zoomlink at noon. That's it, not
an email, not a text fromthe company. I just clicked on this
zoom and there was these two picture, two perfect nineties ben afflecks, these
like perfect square jot guys in suitswhose job it was to just mass fire
people. And I was like Iremember, I remember. There was like

(37:49):
do you have any questions? AndI was like, yeah, am I
being fired? And they were likeoh yeah, and I was like thanks,
I didn't know that. So yeah, Like it's just it's it's not
so much that the jobs end,it's how they end. It's how quickly
they end, how quickly, Likeyou're oh, your show's canceled, so
now you're out of work. It'slike it's very very brutal, very quickly,
over and over and over, andthat's a stereotype of Los Angeles,

(38:13):
but I think is unfortunately true.It's just like it's just a whole city
full of people out there for themselves. So there's a lot of we should
totally get dinner, and then there'speople like me who are like, Mom,
they said we're gonna go get dinner, and like and then like did
I ever see that person again?Sure? Yeah, yeah, And then
when I do actually get invited todinner, I have paper towels stuck to

(38:36):
my head. Yes, yeah,I do think just going back to the
idea of like like you lose inyour files and everything, so I think
there's more of a kind of cultureof keeping things digitally now though any way
that that hasn't been there's quite alot a lot of academic research into into

(39:00):
theater actors who get to the endof a run of a show and they
get the blues afterwards, and TVand film actors don't get it to the
same extent, And one of thetheories is that there's more of a document
of the like there's a document ofthe TV show or the film, and

(39:21):
there's a there's a memento at theend where there's a lot of theater it's
gone into the other and I know, like COVID kind of changed a little
bit of how that happens, butthere's still kind of a feeling. There's
still a feeling in theater that youcan't quite do it justice on screen.
Yeah, that blues feeling is real, isn't it. Yeah? They call
it the end of summer camp feeling. Yeah, absolutely, summer camp.

(39:45):
Why what did you do? Ijust wanted to go home? But yeah,
I was writing an article today aboutthe Tonys and Gutenberg and I got
so spoiled when they recorded a fewBroadway shows during like and release them during
COVID that I'm like, can Ijust have every Broadway show on? Yeah?

(40:07):
On demand? But yeah, that'sso true, and there's so much
work goes into it and then it'sover. I had a show on the
West End for a really long timebefore coved, and we don't have a
full document of it, and it'sit's people get frustrated when they're at concerts
and everyone has their phones up.But I would I would take that over.

(40:28):
You know those there are these legendarystories where it's like the Beatles when
they performed here and nobody thought torecord it. Just it's just lost to
time, you know, or likethese famous stories that people were there remember.
So I'll take I'll take looking atpeople's phones. I'm in the middle
because and I'm going to post thisto our stories every episode, Sam,
I do what I call footnotes,where I like take things we talked about

(40:51):
and I put visual references in becauseagain, I'm trying to make this a
visual medium. Apparently, And Iwas at Disneyland and I was on the
Car's Ride, which everybody knows islike the best ride of Disneyland, and
the girls in front of us,I don't think they looked up from their
phones the entire time, to thepoint it was like they had come from

(41:15):
They said they had come from Japanto come to Disneyland, and so we're
on the ride and it was justlike it was like this the whole time,
and like looking at themselves in thething. And I watched I was
watching it going like oh my god, like I can't imagine looking up at
the end of the day and beinglike did we go to the theme park,
and so I'm gonna post our photofrom the ride because it's me and

(41:37):
my friend in the back row likeenjoying the ride, and then just these
girls and you can't even see theirfaces because they're sure phones are covering.
So I I'm like, I'm alittle in the middle where I'm like yes
to some things and other things.I'm like, I'm just gonna look this
up on YouTube because someone else willbe sure. Yeah, yeah, someone

(41:58):
someone professionally with a own is takingmuch better footage of this than I will.
That's it. That's it. Yeah, I'm so annoyed that we didn't
get like a full yeah video aboutit, like because it was it ran
for ages and we told it andeverything. I've got a trailer, but
yeah, I do not have thefull thing. And I only don't have

(42:19):
the full thing because I was backthen, I was such a douche,
and I was like, well,I'm still a bit of a douche now,
but theater douche to the end,Like we can't possibly do this justice
on screen, of course you can't. Yeah, my god, yeah,
of course, I said. VHSrecordings of like my high school players that

(42:40):
we would watch immediately after closing night. It was it was like the play's
over, let's all watch ourselves onYeah, Justice, Emily did it?
Do it? Justice? Yeah?Every time I did a Justice AnyWho Oh,

(43:04):
I was going to do the nextone. But is she Emily?
It is? I'm just it,says is she? But I must not
have you can? You can doit? I must. I didn't.
I was just also doing it.But let just go for it. Cool?
Cool, Sam? Yes, whatis your definition of making it?
This interview comes at a very specificpoint in my life. If you had

(43:28):
asked me three months ago and Ilistened to another I know this is a
common response. Is my point.I've heard your podcast before. I thought
you were going to say this podcastis making yeah. Yeah, yeah,
No, I said, nobody,No, it's uh, it's just just

(43:51):
I okay. So, like Isaid, I was newly laid off or
that haven't been out of work ina decade and did still a little traveling.
Went to France in London again andjust seeing seeing how people work to
live over there as opposed to livingto work in America is just fascinating and
humbling. It makes you embarrassed ofhow you've been living. So my definition

(44:15):
as of what June thirteenth, twentytwenty four, would be, if I
can pay my bills, then I'mgood. If I can if I can
eat and have health insurance from performing, then that's it. That's like,
there, did I don't need aNetflix stand up special or you know whatever,

(44:36):
I don't need. I don't needto be known. I think that's
like a real early twenties thing,this need for people to know who you
are and to like be seen,and like, I'm totally comfortable now being
behind the scenes and making somebody else'spodcast and not having my name on it
and just doing something in my freetime that I like, what about you

(44:57):
guys so sub well amazing. First, I'm gonna say that I am trying
to get to that point that youjust made. Emphasis on the health insurance.
I saw this thing recently that saidlife isn't a theory. You don't

(45:20):
have to prove I don't have toprove it. And as like cliche as
that is, I think that's sopart of the social media struggle is that
we now unintentionally have this I wasgoing to call it a weapon, but
this thing that we can use thatmakes us think we have to prove our
existence because we can compare it tohow while other people are proving their existences.

(45:44):
And I had a conversation with mybrother last week where he said he
was like, just so you know, I couldn't care less if your name
was on a again, like aNetflix show, or you were happy working
like a job where there's no creditgiven. And that struck me so much

(46:05):
and you realize, like, oh, the people I love the most,
I don't care about this. Yeahyeah, And it like washes that away
and you're like, I'm yeah,it takes a minute to get there.
And I think all the people thatI'm sure the three of us admire mutually,
all the performers we all like,seem to have that mindset too of
there it isn't a big deal tothem. Like Daniel day Lewis retires every

(46:30):
movie at the end of it.He's like, I'm done and then just
goes to his farm and fucking cutswood and feeds cows and then they go,
hey, will you be in anothermovie? And he was fine,
yeah, yeah. I think that'swhy we also cling so much to headlines
where so and so is getting divorcedor so and so is having a problem
is because we're like, oh mygod, these people are like also human

(46:53):
and that's not really highlighted unless it'slike in that way on fourtely. But
yeah, yeah, what about you. You look very contemplative right now.
I'm just pondering, stroking my imaginarybeard. I would like to be able

(47:15):
to be choosy about the work Ido, like really choosing, Oh yeah,
that would be good, rather thanlike, because you're always going to
have times where like you have topay the bills, so you have to
do one for the bread and onefor the head, And I'd like to
be able to do everything. Isthat? Is that a phrase? By
the way, I don't know whetherI made it up or if I've never

(47:37):
heard of the Moore I don't.I don't understand it, so I think
you made it in a British accent. Everyone's like, yes, of course,
the classic quote. Yeah, mister, that's it. And I'm totally
content with one for the bread andone for the head. Don't get me
wrong, Like I am buzzing thatI can make any kinds of money of

(48:00):
anything creative at all. Yeah,I think that's amazing. But I would
like to be in a position togo, hmmm, yeah, I don't
really like this screat Yeah. Also, and like you mentioned a minute ago,
like seeing something on Instagram and thenlike realizing it's cheesy but accurate.
That feeling you just describe as justhaving this conversation with somebody is one of

(48:23):
my most favorite feelings. You know, that feeling when someone makes fun of
you but it's accurate, That hotfeeling you get in Yeah, me too.
I love that. There's nothing Ilove more than when someone accurately pegs
you, because there's so many lazyinsults out there that just like, oh,
you're a bitch, and you're likethat's someone's like yeah, you do
this, and you realize it's correct, and you're like, you know,

(48:45):
like in the like a hot feelingwatches over you. I've been getting that
a lot. I'm recently sober,like just said, like three months,
and all these sobriety webs like memesare each one is so fucking cheesy,
each one is so embarrassingly cheesy thatwhen they're accurate, every day I just

(49:07):
get that hot flash where I'm like, oh, oh my god, this
is true, Like this is accurate, and I like it and then move
on with my dad. It's howdads must feel when they look at memes.
Yeah, exactly, yeah, yeahyeah. My mom. First of
all, congratulations on the sobriety.That's wonderful, my mom. I don't

(49:31):
know when it came up, butwhat was I Made for? Came on,
like the original version, not theInstagram piano death version. Yeah,
And my mom was like, Iwas like, this was in Barbie and
she's like, this was in Barbieand I was like, yeah, I
was written for Barbie. It wonthe award, you know, for a
Best Rigninal Song. And she goes, but this is the Instagram song that

(49:52):
everyone dies too. There's so muchcorny stuff on Instagram that I have saved
that set to that. Yeah.Yeah, I'm like, it is okay
that I'm single. It's all right, it's like set to what was I
made for? Anyway. I justwent and saw the band Weedst They do

(50:14):
a teenage dirt bag. Yeah,by the way, they're still incredible.
But when they got to teenage dirtBag in the set list, I saw
multiple gen Z people perk up andbe like, oh, this is the
Instagram song. But it slowed down. But it was like, you're like,
no, your version's sped up,you know, you guys suck Yep.

(50:38):
Yeah, I'm just gonna be reallya it's taking a hard chance,
really dismissive of an entire generation ofpeople. Yeah. At first I thought
you said, weenus do you remember? Do you remember? This was another
thing in school with the s thingwas like you're weenus? Can I did
you not have this? Was itlike they like, you're yes, Haley,

(51:00):
it's what this is called? What? Yeah, I think that's called
I think that was a very popularThey should make a list or an American
public School Bible of like or encyclopediaof just references that are like, yeah,
this was popular nineteen ninety two tothis is the story Marilyn Manson had
his rib re move so he couldsuck histone. This is popular from nineteen

(51:23):
ninety nine to two thousand and one. That one made it there. Yeah,
yeah, yeah, because I genuinelyI was today years old when I
found out that that wasn't true.No, no, it's not. Well,
Haley, next time you're with abunch of actually, don't do this
because you don't get arrested. Iwas gonna be like when you're with middle

(51:45):
school, I just be like,want to see my wiens? Yeah,
see how that plays to go toa middle school, walk in, just
walk into a classroom like you're aperformer and be like hi kids, Kailey,
and then an intimacy gig. Nexttime when you're choreographing, can you
please be like, what if wejust had him gently stroke her wenus?

(52:06):
Huh? What if he nibbled onher weenus lightly. I'm working with a
load of Americans at the moment aswell, so they'll be there. They'll
understand. Well, if they're betweeneighteen and forty, they should they should
get it. I've literally never heardthat before in my life. Yeah,
it was very very popular. Wow, welcome to America. This is what

(52:30):
we're doing over here. I've gotquestions. I bet you do? Context
Like, wow, no context?Huh. It's just funny because it sounds
like weena. It's funny when you'rethe age of a child that can't talk
about inappropriate things because you have noidea what you're talking about, and someone
says wenus, I remember, doyou guys remember the movie The Pianist?

(52:50):
Yes, when The Pianist came out, No boy in my elementary school could
help it be like, are youguys going to see the pianist? Yes?
Yeah, I remember a ton ofjokes about like having a like five
inch pianist in your pocket. Yes, okay, so pure just call him.

(53:13):
Oh, don't worry me wrong.So kids were twisted demented to that
she's just talking about in in no, not in my Not in my world,
I was the girl wor in pewho was picking the grass to make
a fake salad. So I wastoo delicate to know. Do you know
those kids who would like play pretendinstead of actually yeah, in the sport,

(53:37):
I would be like, we're makingsalad out of grass sand. If
you had to give a chapter titlethat sums up your career journey this farm,

(53:58):
what would it be? I thinkit would have gratitude stupid. I
think because I'm naturally hardwired to bea pessimist. It's just in my DNA
and have some mental health things withdepression and that type of stuff. So
it's very very common and easy forme to be in like a crowded party

(54:19):
full of celebrities that I admire thatI was invited to in a beautiful old
castle and just be like this suck, like just like bummed out, you
know, looking around, being likesince I should go home. That has
been the newest thing with the sobrietystuff, is like just trying to be
more grateful every day and just spendingtime looking around being like, by the

(54:40):
way you live in Los Angeles,it's beautiful out. Like I was taking
my dog for a walk this morning, was like hot and sweaty and annoyed
about it and had to stop andbe like, you grew up in Wisconsin.
It's like twelve degrees there right now. Your life is incredible. Chill
out, just relax, like Iat least once every try and be like,

(55:01):
hey, look around, everything's great. That's so nice. Yeah,
because I've had a really really luckycareer. I've like, so I got
laid off, which sucks, butthat was after ten years of not being
laid off, which is an incrediblerun in the entertainment industry and meeting people
I admire and going being flown placesto do incredible shows and perform and be

(55:24):
on stage and you know, multiplefestivals and that type of stuff. But
if you were to ask me howmy life has been, my gut has
been like, eh, yes,it sucks, you know, like yeah,
people were like, people are like, how are things might go to
it's always just like when the answeris like, things are wonderful, everything's
great, you know. Yeah,it's so interesting. What I loved about

(55:47):
our interview with Donnie was, ofcourse you look at him and you're like,
you're so successful, when he looksat his siblings who are not in
entertainment as like a million times moresuccessful than him because they're just great for
their lives. And I think wemeasure it so strangely. And I love
when I meet someone who's at workwho's just like, not that everyone needs

(56:08):
to love their jobs, but they'rejust doing their best. They're happy.
It's rare for some reason to havelike pleasant interactions with people, but I'm
always so afterwards, I'm like,I want to be more like this person
who just seems happy to be here. Yeah. Yeah, it's crazy how
much little effort it technically requires tobe happy. But I think some people

(56:34):
are just hardwired not to be.It's just hardwired. Like I don't know,
I get restless very easy if Idon't have something to focus on.
And they say the way neural pathwayswork in your brain. It's like water
running through sand, or once itgoes through enough, it wears a rut.
So that's the fastest way. Soif you're naturally like this sucks,
that's the fastest pathway of it.Like, So it's just training your brain

(56:55):
to be like things are nice,which feels weird at the first time,
and then hopefully over time it'll geteasier. But for now it's hard.
Hailey. Yeah, what is onething you're grateful for? Well, I'm
grateful for a lot of things.I'm just trying to bring us back.

(57:15):
I feel like I have been paintedas a miserable English person. I wasn't
saying that sassly for a brit Ithink I've got quite lapert energy. Ma.
I think you do too. Thisis I'm the next I'm the I'm
the negative one in the for sure. Oh yes, really okay, oh

(57:37):
boy, oh boy, everything's gonnablow up in my face and it usually
does, for the record, Sothat's something that I have had a hard
time with therapists for years because I'llbe like, yeah, then this is
gonna go bad, and then I'llfunck this up and they'll be like yeah,
but you shouldn't say it, andI'll be like, yeah, but
statistically I will Yeah, I'm gonnablow this and then I do. And

(58:01):
I strongly believe in positive affirmation thoughevery day true, and you can do
that and still fuck up your life. You can things to be too bad
or or you could be dealing withsomeone a guy who is so Looney Tunes
that no matter how much positive affirmationyou do about him being hand gesture,

(58:22):
by the way, this was mylooney Oh okay, okay, this was
my What did you say, Haley? This was my my one for the
blowing red, one for the head, one for the bread, the head.
You guys should make one for thebread, one for the head.
Merch. I need one. Ineed that, and I need Okay,

(58:43):
I will get you a mug Sam, and we need we need. I
was listening to We did an interviewwith a comedian, a British comedian named
Andrew Mensa, and he said,when I was talking about dating, and
he asked me where I lived andI said l A. He said l
A don't count, and I waslike, I want a hat. L
A don't on count. Very accurate. Yeah, I love it. I

(59:05):
feel like grounding up. Yeah,well, we need. We need to
end on a a brilliant insight.I have something we can go out on.
Have I showed you my or whenyou were stalking me online? Did
you see when I went to ComicCon as big Titty Gandal that was also
on my list? I'm so excitedright now. So that oh my god

(59:30):
lord, mm hmm so uh.In terms of sweet dreams tonight, in
terms of things that give me gratitude, I have a list. I have
like a list of stuff that alllike it's like a literally just an Excel
document. When I'm down of stuffthat always cheers me up. It's like
YouTube videos. It will be likea Regina Specter song and then Otters cuddling.

(59:52):
It's just, yeah, she's thebest. But it's like stuff that
like always always cheers me up,and like like it's just something I'll read
through a Calvin and Hobbes quote orsomething like that. Uh. And one
of the things on there is thismeme of big Titty Gandolf because it's so
perfect to me, it's exactly whatthe Internet was put here for. You've

(01:00:13):
taken a character and you've given himgiant boobs. That's the whole bit.
That's the whole bit. That's it, and it's flawless. And every time
I see it, people send itto me, Like every six months it
comes up and rotation, people sendit to me. So I went as
to the LA Comic Book Convention dressedas big Titty Gandalf. Nobody got it.
Nobody, nobody was familiar, nobodywas familiar with the meme. Everyone

(01:00:38):
was pointing it was. It gotso much more attention than I expected,
in a negative way of people beinglike, oh my god, which again
just fueled my love of it evenmore. But I yeah, I got
in line. I had something signedby Elijah Wood. There he got it.
Sean Aston, who's Sam Wise andLord of the Rings. He looked

(01:00:58):
up at me and just went andsigned my facepaper and just moved on.
It was the best it couldn't haveIt was so much better than if he
loved it. It was the best. Wait, Sam, you should have
asked him to sign your titties.Okay, here's the thing. I didn't
think of that until I left.Until I left the convention, I was
like, Oh, that's that's somuch funniers to have him sign my boobs.

(01:01:22):
But I fucked that up what he'smade of. Hayley would like to
know the same thing. Drag Queensused like a chest plate that like goes
around your neck. Yeah, amazing, it'd been amazing to have that signed.
Yes, I know, I know. Oh that's sad. YEA life

(01:01:44):
is full of regrets absolutely, andthat is perfect level of pessimism to take
us out. Yeah, we've justput the world to right. So that's
it now, Everyone calmed down,Everyone relax, everything's good. Take some
time to be full of gratitude todayby a funko pop. Yes, have

(01:02:07):
it signed by Elijah Wood. Evenif it's not Elijah Wood, have him
sign it. Yeah, and justdon't be a dick. Thank you,
Sam. I love you guys,all man. How to Make It is
recorded from a closet in New Jerseyand a basement in Leeds, United Kingdom.

(01:02:28):
It's produced by Emily Capello and HaleyMurlei Darren. For more adventures with
Emily and Haley, follow us onInstagram at how to Make It Podcast,
where you'll find clips from today's episode, many episode clips, and more random
nonsense. Like and subscribe to ourpodcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or

(01:02:52):
wherever other fine podcasts are found