May 27, 2025 • 34 mins
Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussion of sexual assault, medical examinations, and references to high-profile abuse cases. Please listen with care.
In this intimate and compassionate conversation, we sit down with Nurse Noel, a certified SANE (Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner)to discuss what truly happens in the moments after a sexual assault — and how survivors can receive trauma-informed care without shame or fear.
Using recent headlines — including Cassie Ventura’s accusations against Sean “Diddy” Combs — as a backdrop, we examine the psychological barriers many survivors face when deciding whether to seek help. From the myths about reporting, to the quiet strength it takes to walk into a hospital or clinic, this episode sheds light on the medical and emotional support survivors deserve.
Our guest shares what the forensic exam actually involves, how nurses are trained to approach each patient with empathy, and why coming forward — whether publicly or privately — is always a deeply personal choice, not a requirement for healing.
If you or someone you love has experienced sexual violence, this episode offers clarity, compassion, and a reminder: you are not alone, and there is care available that honors your dignity.
Mental Health is a Lifestyle Podcast with Andrea Wise-Brown, is where we discuss practical strategies for managing mental health and wellbeing.
Thank you for listening to this episode of Mental Health is a Lifestyle Podcast. We hope you found these practical tips helpful and encourage you to continue prioritizing your mental health and wellness.
If you have any questions or suggestions for future episodes, please email us at
mhialpodcast@gmail.com.
See you next time!
Find Andrea: awisebrown.com
Follow The Podcast At @mentalhealthisalifestylepod Mhialpodcast@gmail.com I want to know your opinions…….
In addition; if you have any questions that you want answered on the podcast send your request to mhialpodcast@gmail.com or inbox me @mentalhealthisalifestylepod
Remember, Mental health is a Lifestyle!®️😘
In this intimate and compassionate conversation, we sit down with Nurse Noel, a certified SANE (Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner)to discuss what truly happens in the moments after a sexual assault — and how survivors can receive trauma-informed care without shame or fear.
Using recent headlines — including Cassie Ventura’s accusations against Sean “Diddy” Combs — as a backdrop, we examine the psychological barriers many survivors face when deciding whether to seek help. From the myths about reporting, to the quiet strength it takes to walk into a hospital or clinic, this episode sheds light on the medical and emotional support survivors deserve.
Our guest shares what the forensic exam actually involves, how nurses are trained to approach each patient with empathy, and why coming forward — whether publicly or privately — is always a deeply personal choice, not a requirement for healing.
If you or someone you love has experienced sexual violence, this episode offers clarity, compassion, and a reminder: you are not alone, and there is care available that honors your dignity.
Mental Health is a Lifestyle Podcast with Andrea Wise-Brown, is where we discuss practical strategies for managing mental health and wellbeing.
Thank you for listening to this episode of Mental Health is a Lifestyle Podcast. We hope you found these practical tips helpful and encourage you to continue prioritizing your mental health and wellness.
If you have any questions or suggestions for future episodes, please email us at
mhialpodcast@gmail.com.
See you next time!
Find Andrea: awisebrown.com
Follow The Podcast At @mentalhealthisalifestylepod Mhialpodcast@gmail.com I want to know your opinions…….
In addition; if you have any questions that you want answered on the podcast send your request to mhialpodcast@gmail.com or inbox me @mentalhealthisalifestylepod
Remember, Mental health is a Lifestyle!®️😘
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This podcast is not a substitute for our relationship with
your mental health professional. This episode contains discussions of sexual
and physical abuse.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Warning.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
Hello, Hello, Hello, hey, family, and welcome back to another
episode of the Mental Health Is a lifestyle podcast with
your Girl, Andrea Wise Brown and Family. Oh wait, hold on,
if you've been passing by and you have not joined
(00:41):
the family as of yet, please do so. It's so
easy and it doesn't cost you anything.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
All you have to.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
Do is click this little subscribe button, subscribe to the podcast,
like the podcast, and share the episode with another family
member or a friend, someone who you know you want
to bless with whatever we're talking about today. Okay, so
now the business, we're gonna move on because that's taken
(01:11):
care of. And today, family, we are going to jump
right on in. We have another expert with us here today.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
And you know it's.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Coming in because well she's coming in because everybody's talking
about the Diddy trial, the Diddy trial, the Diddy trial,
the Diddy trial. Did he and Cassie Diddy and Cassie
and then I had a lot of questions about cassie psychological.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
State, But there were more more so than question.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
There's a lot of judgment, a lot of judgment out
there about Cassie and why she stayed and if she
really wanted the abuse and if she loved the abuse,
and you know, just people saying that when you're in
a situation, in an abusive relationship or maybe engaging in
(02:04):
acts with someone who is.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
Abusive to you, if you say, then the.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
What it seems is if people are saying that, the
critique is is it's because you wanted it, you know,
It's it's because now you've become a part of it.
You're a co conspirator, you know. But that's not necessarily true.
And I talked about that in my last podcast and
it's actually labeled why did Cassie say?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (02:32):
But today we're going a little bit deeper and we're
gonna talk.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
To a sane nurse.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
So let me introduce this beautiful, smart woman right here
today who's also my friend. In full transparency, her name
is Nurse Noel's nurse. So wel please tell us what
does sane stand for?
Speaker 3 (02:55):
Hi? Thank you for having me. This is so amazing
because this conversation definitely needs to be had. So the
same is it stands for? You know, same sexual assault
Nurse Examiner, and you have to be a registered nurse
to be one, and you have to go through extra
training to get certified and sexual assault forensic nursing.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Mm hmm. Okay, okay, good, good, good, because I wanted
everybody to know what that meant, because at first I
didn't know what it meant either. You had to teach
me and tell me that. Okay, because we know family,
there's nurses. But this nurse has a special certification to
work with women and men I'm assuming will have been
(03:40):
sexually assaulted.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Is that true?
Speaker 3 (03:42):
That is true. We work with women and men ages
thirteen and above, so thirteen and under is a different certification.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Okay, Oh that's so good to know.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Okay, So I just wanted to jump in from and
get your expertise.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
On well a few things.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
But you know, allegedly Cassie said that she was sexually
abused by Diddy, and she's also claiming or either the
prosecution the state is claiming that she was sexually trafficked. Okay,
so he is still on trial. We will say allegedly
allegedly allegedly, However, I know that I did see and
(04:23):
you probably did too. Nurse Noel, I did see that
video where he was physically.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
Abusing her, so that I do believe to be true.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
However, we're talking about sexual assault today, so my first
question is, and I'm just kind of going off of
the critique of other people, So just from your perspectives,
why is it do you believe that people don't come into.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
The hospital to.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
When they are sexually abused, because my assumption is, let
me just set this up. I'm sorry, my assumption is
is that people would think that if Cassie was sexually abused,
then why didn't she go to the police station, and
why didn't she go to the hospital, or however it goes.
So I'm just wondering if you could shed light on
the process and then tell us, you know, from your
(05:16):
own personal accounts with dealing with patients, why is it
that people don't come in for a treatment after being
sexually abused?
Speaker 3 (05:26):
Okay, so with sexual assault one in six women, let's
let's focus on women right now, because this is a woman.
Cassie is a woman. One in six women are They
are victims or survivors. We call them survivors. They are
survivors of an attempted or a completed sexual assault. So
(05:48):
and usually most of the women are that come in
contact with their sailants. The sailants are usually familiar to them,
so that's a high percentage. Also, so it's embarrassed. It's
what did I do? Why did I deserve this? What
did I do to make this, you know, to make
this happen? Why did I you know, why was I
(06:08):
so weak? And that's usually the consensus of most of
the sexual assault survivors.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Okay, so survivors, and so you believe that this is
why they don't seek treatment exactly. Okay, So what is
the process? What does it look like? I'm just wondering
if someone comes into your facility and we'll talk about well,
I know women and men, but if they come into
your facility, and where is it that you work, what
(06:34):
do you have saying sexual assault nurses in? Is it
the hospital? Is it in private practice? Like what does
that look like? And what does it look like for
someone to come in and see you?
Speaker 3 (06:46):
Okay, so sayings are we are employed by the county.
So this is for the district attorney. A lot of
people think that it's hospital based, but it is definitely
for the district attorney. And what anytime someone in in
an emergency room and they have sexual assault, you know,
cues that cused the physician or the nurse to call
(07:09):
the district Attorney's office or the police, you know, the authorities,
and they send us out to the specific hospital. So
I'm home and I can get a call saying, hey,
go to such and such hospital or to ABC hospital
or X y Z hospital to perform a sexual assault
nurse examiner's examination on the assault on the on the survivor.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Okay, okay, all right, so oh that's good. Okay, because
because now this lends back to a lot of women
and men victims, they don't tell. So they just may
be coming into the hospital for I don't know, a
broken knee, a broken arm, or you.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Know what I'm saying, something that happened to them.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
And as they're getting that treatment, someone in the emergency
room who's treating them, the nurse or the doctor is
noticing some certain there's some symptoms and decides and I
love that you said cues, and then they have to
make the decision to make a call. And so they call,
you say, the district attorney's office.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Call, Yes, we call the district attorneys. Well, I'm a
nurse in emergency room also, so I would call the
district attorney's office and then they would send out a
sexual assault nursing examiner.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
I got you. Okay, that's so good.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
All right, So now before you tell me about the examination,
because I'm just thinking, I'm trying to figure out is
this examination different than a regular examination? And the reason
why we're talking about this is I want anyone who's
listening to know that there is help for you. And uh, look,
(08:54):
they have a whole team of nurses who have special
training to support you. So I just feel like it's
important for us to educate the community on the support
that's out there, and hopefully this encourages them to get
treatment and to speak about it and to say something
about it. But okay, so before I ask you what
(09:19):
it looks like the examination, tell me why did you
even become certified as a saying So let.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Me let me just backtrack. I've been a nurse since
nineteen ninety eight, and being a registered nurse. You know,
my mom was a nurse, my aunt's are nurses, and
it was just a family thing. I love being a nurse. However,
in nineteen ninety I want to say nineteen ninety nine
or nineteen ninety eight. I was sexually assaulted. And I
was a baby nurse. I was I just started nursing,
(09:52):
and I was somewhere that I felt that I should
not have been. I went to someone's house. I went
to this man's house and it was midnight, and you know,
the first question is, well, what are you doing in
his house at twelve?
Speaker 1 (10:04):
You know?
Speaker 3 (10:05):
What was up? You know, and those questions and this
is I'm young, I'm young at this time. I'm inexperienced,
I'm naive, I'm a you know, a sheltered church girl.
So I didn't take those you know, those cues are
like come over, you know. And alcohol was in play.
He was drinking. I was not, And I was sexually assaulted.
I suppressed. I suppressed this. I suppressed this. You know
(10:30):
for years I did not think of it. I didn't
know it.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
So let me ask you. This is good because I
didn't even know we were going here. This is good, No,
this is good. I just wanted to say, well, I
want to ask you. I want to say sorry that
that happened to you. In addition to that, in addition
to that, I think this is good because you know,
you started off with saying, when victims come into the
(10:56):
emergency room where you see them, they have all of
these stories in their head that they're telling themselves. So
it was my fault. What was I doing there? Why
didn't I? You know, so tell us more about that.
That's that's good.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
So I you know, the first thing that I was
asked by a friend was well, what were you doing
at this man's house at twelve midnight? That is not
what we do. You knew what was up. You had
to have known. I said, I was going over there
to see a movie, to watch a movie. That's I
was so excited about this movie that I saw, and
it just sparked my interest, as you know, you know,
(11:31):
as a moviegoer. And I got the VHS tape. This
is telling you how long ago it was. I got
the VHS tape, I took it to his house, we
watched I watched it, he drank and the assault happened.
Now after I want to say, two days, I didn't
remember anything.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
Hey, family, come on over here, because I have something
for you. Starting off with a go to guide for
keeping your minds healthy and strong. This right here is
the Bible to mental health. It's your mental health Bible.
The name of it is six Pillars to power up
(12:12):
your mind and make mental health a lifestyle. Everything that
you need to know about keeping your minds healthy and
strong is.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
In this go to guide. Where you get it from?
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Will you get it from awisebrown dot com, backslash shop,
But in this go to guide, honey, in this mental
health Bible, you know what you're gonna find out. You're
gonna find out the benefits of aroma therapy and how
it can shift your mood.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
But guess what, you don't have to go anyplace.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
Else to look for you aromatherapy because your girls got you. Okay,
you can get some aromatherapy here. This is a roma therapy.
In this candle, this is called a slice of happiness.
It makes me tingle like literally makes me tingle a
slice of happiness. This is a cruelty free candle with
(13:11):
no parabins, no formaldehyde, and no known suspected carcinogenics. Now
you know, you go out here and you find these
candles that smell good, But are they good for you?
Are they good for your brain? Come on, now, get
real with yourself well, this one smells delicious.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
And it's good for you. Made with essential oils. It's
a soy candle.
Speaker 3 (13:36):
Amazing.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
You can burn it or you can just walk by
and smell it. Lord, have mercy, it's so good.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
So that's your candle, your romotherapy, which raises the dopamine
in your brain, that your natural feel good no transmitters
in your brain.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
All right, y'all.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
And oh, I'm a part of you. You're a part
of me. We are a family. We got hoodies now,
and these are unus sex hoodies and they wear well,
they wash well, and they feel so good. So you
can wear them over your clothes, you know what I'm saying,
and look dope. Or you can wear them as your
clothes with nothing under them, which I like to do often.
(14:16):
And when you travel everywhere, I mean every time I
wear them, I'm moving around, people are always asking me
whether I'm traveling, going to the supermarket, what's that?
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Who's that?
Speaker 1 (14:24):
And I'm like, mental health is a lifestyle because see
this is on the back. Okay, they come in white
and they come in black. I'm like, join the family.
Mental health is a lifestyle podcast.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
So there you go.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
Family don't you ever say then, I ain't give you nothing.
Speaker 1 (14:41):
You get all of these things from awisbrown dot com
backslash shop. All right, I got your goods. I got you.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
You don't have to go any place else.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
I'll see you on the other side. Now, why didn't
I go to the hospital. Why didn't I call the authorities? One?
I didn't know I could. I thought I would be
I thought I would be blamed.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
Yeah, So when you say I didn't know I could,
that's what I want because someone else would hear this
and say, what do you mean you didn't know you could?
You just pick up the phone and call. But it
was because of the thoughts that you had in your head,
the story you was telling yourself.
Speaker 3 (15:17):
And yes, and also I knew him. So you know,
you don't think of acquaintance rape or date rape as
a thing. You always think it's in some type of city,
you know, you know, some cit hallway or some alleyway,
and you know it's brutal, and it's not all always
like that. We see spouses, we see you know, brothers
and sisters, we see friends, we see boyfriends. You know,
(15:42):
it's it's very common.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Yeah, and what is that called that that was That
was good.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
So it's it's not just just generally when people and
I think this is what you're saying when people think
about sexual assault. Right, when you think about sexual assault,
you're thinking that it's somebody you don't know, know what
happens down a dark alley.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
You know what I mean that you know, they may whatever.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
I don't need to describe anymore because I don't want
to trigger anyone. However, what you're saying is they are
more forms of rape than that form of breath.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
And so what did you what did you What was
the name that you said?
Speaker 3 (16:16):
This was it's acquaintance rape, acquaintance assault.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Wow, acquaintance. That's good.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
So meaning that you knew him, you were familiar with him, Yes,
and that can be categorized as rape also, Yes, because
what I know for sure is I don't care what
you're doing, how you doing, how close you're doing, and
how many VHS tapes, how much music you listen to,
how much people drink. When a person says no, they
(16:46):
mean no, and it is no. And even if you
were kissing the guy, even if y'all were groping, that
still does not say yes unless you say yes you can.
You could if when you say.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
No, no means no.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
So okay, yeah, so nurse Noel. So you was in
this situation, acquaintance. Y'all were gonna watch your movie the
the abuse occurred, and then you said you felt like
you couldn't tell you couldn't call anybody because he was
an acquaintance and you felt like you were going to
be blamed.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
That is horrible.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
Okay, So you said that that memory didn't come up
till two days later. So I won't even ask you
because I'm sure people are thinking, so, now, how does
she leave out? How does she get home? How does
she and so?
Speaker 3 (17:38):
And here it is, I can tell it. I can
tell it. No, the memory, it didn't come back two
days later. I didn't. I kept the memory for only
two days and then it left for years. So that's
what I wanted to clarify. I. You know, my friend
I called. I went to a payphone outside, shirt ripped hands, rapped,
no shoes, ran outside, called Collect to one of my friends.
(18:01):
Because at that time, no one had cell phones. We
were calling on you know, on land lines. I called
her collect and I told her to call back the
number because back then, payphones had numbers. I called her.
She called back. I told her, please come get me.
Bring my other friend to come get me, and they
both came in. One drove my car home and we
(18:23):
didn't discuss it after that. We never discussed it for years.
And then it came back up. I want to say
twelve years later. Yeah, about eleven or twelve years later,
it did. The memory just came back.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Oh, that's so good.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
And a part of post traumatic stress is really well
disorder is a disassociation, so really disassociating yourself where you
kind of feel out of body, like it's an out
of body experience. And then I'm just assuming you probably
just compartmentalized it and we do that, you know, that's
(18:59):
the brain trick to kind of to not blow up,
so that you know, the brain feels like, oh if
I kind of think about this and feel like I
have to deal with this and I have to figure
it out, then I may.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Just blow up.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
So what the brain does is it kind of puts
it in a compartment to where I call them little drawers,
to where you don't have to deal with it right then,
and then you move on the surface. But wow, I'm
just imagining how that shifted your quality of life.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Oh my gosh, it.
Speaker 3 (19:30):
Said, because you know, at first, I'm like, well, why me,
why didn't I remember this? And then you know, we're
taught in psychology class that this is what happens. You know,
we memories are suppressed. We don't remember things, and certain
things can trigger them. And I don't know what triggered it.
I think it was, you know what, it was actually
(19:51):
a conversation. It was a conversation between my friend and
someone else who knew but didn't believe me. So that
came up and I said, you know what, it's time
for me to take my health into my own hands,
to get some therapy, talk about it, and write about it.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
So that helped me a lot too, right, that's so,
that's so great.
Speaker 2 (20:16):
That is great. That's great.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Okay, and thank you for sharing your story because you
have a personal account of exactly what we're talking about.
And so you said that this is the reason that
you decided that you wanted to become certified.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
Yes, yes, it is. I was working at University Hospital
in York at the time, and I a woman came
in my patient you know, I'm taking over, and she's
on a ventilator. She's on life support, and we're we're
giving over a report. And I found out that she
was sexually assaulted. How did they know she had? She
had bleeding from both orifices and she was They found
(20:55):
her underwear around her ankles. They found her head had
a blunt blunt trauma, and she was you know, she
had signs and symptoms of being sexually assaulted. So these
two women, they came in, I mean when they came in,
they came in aggressively. They came in, you know, with
their with their black light, with their you know, the
whole CSI thing, and I'm looking like, what is this?
(21:19):
I was I didn't even understand what this was. This
was after thirteen years of being a registered nurse, I've
never seen anything like it. And we got the subpoena.
They provided us with a subpoena and then they started
they went at it and then I can tell you know,
then I can tell you what we do.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
So okay, good, no, so go ahead, finish talk and
so tell us what you do. So and I just
want to know, so did you you stayed in the
room with them when they were doing Okay.
Speaker 3 (21:44):
So I honest, yeah, I asked. I was so intrigued,
like what are you doing? And they told us that
we are sexual assault nurse examiners. We're registered nurses and
we were certified to come in and do pelvic exams,
which is, you know, with the speculum. They take samples,
they do anal swabs, they check underneath finger fingernails, they
(22:05):
check the hair, They do the whole. If you've ever
watched any type of forensic show like CSI, that's what
they do. They do the whole. It's the whole gamut.
They pluck hairs off, they take pictures. You know, it's
a whole. It's a whole process. Now sayings, we are
supposed to be objective. However, because I went through it,
(22:25):
I can be a little more empathetic to the survivor.
So we but we Oh, I forgot to tell you this.
We also provide medication. So if a person comes in
and we do an examination, now this is voluntary, we
cannot do it unless we are given permission. You cannot
(22:46):
just go and put us, you know, do an examination
on someone who is not who who can give consent. Now,
my patient could not give consent, so the district attorney,
you know they had a subpoena. However, if it's like
me walking into an emergency room, I can opt to
not have an examination.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Okay, all right, so yeah, let me let me kind
of go back and clarify that.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
So you were saying, okay, when.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
You were there and someone when these nurses came in,
y'all received the subpoena. When the district attorney subpoenas you
guys to perform this, then this examination when the victim
comes in, then the victim pretty much like they don't
(23:34):
need to give consent exactly.
Speaker 2 (23:37):
Wow, that's interesting.
Speaker 3 (23:39):
But they're they're unconscious, so they can't. It's uh, you know,
if you come in unconscious. This patient was on life support.
This patient couldn't give consent. There was no next of ken.
She had heroin and cocaine in her system, so she
you know, most likely she was she was homeless. She
was found in an abandoned building, so there was no
one that could give consent. So it was over ridden
(24:00):
by the district attorney with the subpoena. And that's why
we did that.
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
I'm glad you clarified that. Because if the person, like
any other person.
Speaker 3 (24:10):
Is.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Aware of their surroundings.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Then they have to give consent before this is this
examination has taken place exactly, okay, okay, all right, and
so once they give consent and then you do it,
so and then all of that I guess that's so good.
Everything that's found right in that package. Then that package
(24:39):
is what's sent off to does the does the patient
get it or does the like who gets it?
Speaker 3 (24:44):
Yeah, the medical examiner gets all of the data and
they do that's when they do the testing. They're testing
for you know, semen on the skin, they're testing for hair,
they're testing for any skin or DNA under the nails
or anything like that. That's what they're testing.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
Okay, Oh that's good. Okay. So this so if anyone
out here has been sexually assaulted, whether it's been by
a stranger or an acquaintance, the great thing about getting
one of these examinations by a saying when you go
to the emergency room is this can be evidence to
(25:23):
prove that you were abused.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
In some way. So this is a this is a
good thing. This is a good thing.
Speaker 3 (25:30):
As women, we have been muted for so long we
are are our testimony has been suppressed and repressed for
so long that we're afraid that, you know, of judgment.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
We're afraid of judgment, yeah, afraid of judgment, yeah, from
the outside world. And so and we've seen this right like,
we've seen it before, we've seen it with in the media,
we've seen it on social media. And just like now,
even though Cass allegedly who has been sexually abused, this
(26:04):
is some years later for whatever reason and however she
handled it, whether she suppressed it or not, it took
so many years, ten years, eleven years for her to
say something, and everybody is shaming her. They're victim blaming
her and saying that she must have been a part
of it. And this is the reason why people don't
tell it something you wanted to say exactly.
Speaker 3 (26:27):
So along with you know, data collection. Because of data collection,
we also provide medication. So we give antibiotics for any
type of STIs that are bacterial, and we also give
anti retroviral medications. We give medications for herpes HIV, which
are viral viruses, and we also give medication for bacterial
(26:51):
infections such as chlamydia and things like that.
Speaker 1 (26:54):
Oh that's so good. So that means if someone comes
in and they're infected. You want to try to addres
it immediately.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
Yes, prophilactically, we get prophilactic medication. We also give Plan B,
which is you know, so we get the morning after
pill for unwanted pregnancy.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Oh that's so good. I love that. So let me
ask this for survivors or victims who are out here,
whichever you choose to call yourself, how do you approach
survivors who may be scared, confused, or reluctant to undergo
(27:32):
the exam.
Speaker 3 (27:34):
That's a hard one because everyone is different. You know,
you can't it's not every it's not a cookie cutter thing.
You have to assess the situation. And sometimes we call
the hospital psychologists, so we do refers for mental screenings
and things like that. Because we're not trained to do that,
(27:56):
so we don't do it. That's the that is the key.
We are not trained to do that, so we do
not do that because people will try.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
I got you, and so I guess the question I
was asking is, so if someone comes in and they're
scared and they're confused what you're saying.
Speaker 2 (28:16):
I love that. There's no cookie cut of answer. So
I see.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
So, if you need support from someplace else, from the
psychologist at the hospital or whatever it is.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
I mean, I guess whomever it is.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
I don't even know who else would actually come in
and help to support, to maybe make the victim feel
more comfortable if they're confused.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
So I'm wondering.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
I'm sure you if someone came in and they were confused,
you'd educate them, of course, right.
Speaker 3 (28:45):
Well, yeah, when we educate them and we talk to them,
I try not to. You know, sometimes it's hard because
you try to be empathetic, and you know, not every
patient I'm gonna say, well, you know what, I was
sexually assaulted too. But you know, sometimes it does help,
you know, it does help. We do, and sometimes the
District Attorney's office sends out people to help also, so
(29:08):
they're on staff with them with the journey.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
I got you. So to me, it sounds like what
you're saying is you did to do one job to
collect whatever the sample is that you're supposed to collect,
and that's what you do. You ain't there to coherse nobody,
You're not there to talk nobody off a ledge. I
got you, And so if someone if you need that support,
then you reach out, Okay, that's good. So let me
(29:32):
ask you this, what advice would you give to someone
who has just experienced sexual assault but it's unsure whether
they should seek medical care.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
I would definitely tell them that it's not for the
prosecution of the assailant. So a lot of people think that, oh,
I'm going to go to court, that this is why
you're joining this. It's also for your health. It's also
because we give answer rust or viral medications. It's because
we give antibiotics. It's because we give you know, treatment
for prophilogically for STIs that may have not even been
(30:11):
have come up yet. It's because we can provide the
plan B. It's not only because let's get this, let's
get this assailant. That's not that's not how we go
into it. We go into it as your health is
the number one priority. You do not want any STIs
that you do not have or you do not you
know that you don't want and you don't want an
unwanted pregnancy. So I kind of like spin it on
(30:34):
that not to be cohersive, because remember we are expert
witnesses too. Now if this goes to trial, I am
also an expert witness and I don't want to say
anything that's going to mess up my testimony or mess
you know, mess me up that I won't be able
to give objective testimony.
Speaker 2 (30:55):
You would tell them to seek medical care.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
I would tell them to seek medical care because you
can be treated. That's why you can be treated. It's
not you know, we're gonna just be writing things down,
it's will you can be treated. There's active treatment, and
it's no cost to you. So yeah, of course I tell.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
Them not okay, No, that's good.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
Okay. How can hospitals, law enforcement, or communities better support
sayings and survivors.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
Do you have an opinion on that?
Speaker 3 (31:33):
I think we need to be out in the forefront.
People don't know we exist, so there's no you know,
until it happens. I think it should be educated education
in the schools, in the community that we do exist,
and the services that we provide because they're you know,
when I tell people I'm not saying, they're like, what
is that? I've never heard of that? But yet I'm
(31:54):
talking to sexual survivors, sexual assault survivors, and I'm like,
wait a second, you don't know what we do, who
we are. And so I think with the District Attorney
with the communities. I think as a whole, they just
need to put out the word that we provide services
and who we are.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
No, that's good, I totally agree.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
So aren't there any resources that we can give to
maybe victims or survivors who could be listening here today.
Speaker 3 (32:23):
You can always go to reign dot org, r ai
n dot org, or you can text or call ninety
eight eight.
Speaker 1 (32:32):
Okay, great, I am going to put that up on
the screen so that everyone has that. And please Nurse
no wel let the family know how they can keep
up with you, how they can find you.
Speaker 3 (32:47):
You can find me on ig at official nurse no
well and you are se and O E L. I
also have a website nasenalwil dot com where you can
send in your questions and things like that, and I
do so it goes down in the dam Just DM.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
Me okay, oh that's good.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Well, thank you, my beautiful smart friend who is also
a nurse and a.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
Certified s A n e SAT.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
Thank you so much for joining me on this episode
and educating the family and family. That is another episode
of the Mental Health is a lifestyle podcast with your
Girl Andrea Wise Brown and family. I will see you
(33:40):
again next week on the next episode, but don't you
ever forget I love you.
This podcast is not a substitute for our relationship with
your mental health professional. This episode contains discussions of sexual
and physical abuse.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Warning.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
Hello, Hello, Hello, hey, family, and welcome back to another
episode of the Mental Health Is a lifestyle podcast with
your Girl, Andrea Wise Brown and Family. Oh wait, hold on,
if you've been passing by and you have not joined
(00:41):
the family as of yet, please do so. It's so
easy and it doesn't cost you anything.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
All you have to.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
Do is click this little subscribe button, subscribe to the podcast,
like the podcast, and share the episode with another family
member or a friend, someone who you know you want
to bless with whatever we're talking about today. Okay, so
now the business, we're gonna move on because that's taken
(01:11):
care of. And today, family, we are going to jump
right on in. We have another expert with us here today.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
And you know it's.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Coming in because well she's coming in because everybody's talking
about the Diddy trial, the Diddy trial, the Diddy trial,
the Diddy trial. Did he and Cassie Diddy and Cassie
and then I had a lot of questions about cassie psychological.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
State, But there were more more so than question.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
There's a lot of judgment, a lot of judgment out
there about Cassie and why she stayed and if she
really wanted the abuse and if she loved the abuse,
and you know, just people saying that when you're in
a situation, in an abusive relationship or maybe engaging in
(02:04):
acts with someone who is.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
Abusive to you, if you say, then the.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
What it seems is if people are saying that, the
critique is is it's because you wanted it, you know,
It's it's because now you've become a part of it.
You're a co conspirator, you know. But that's not necessarily true.
And I talked about that in my last podcast and
it's actually labeled why did Cassie say?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (02:32):
But today we're going a little bit deeper and we're
gonna talk.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
To a sane nurse.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
So let me introduce this beautiful, smart woman right here
today who's also my friend. In full transparency, her name
is Nurse Noel's nurse. So wel please tell us what
does sane stand for?
Speaker 3 (02:55):
Hi? Thank you for having me. This is so amazing
because this conversation definitely needs to be had. So the
same is it stands for? You know, same sexual assault
Nurse Examiner, and you have to be a registered nurse
to be one, and you have to go through extra
training to get certified and sexual assault forensic nursing.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Mm hmm. Okay, okay, good, good, good, because I wanted
everybody to know what that meant, because at first I
didn't know what it meant either. You had to teach
me and tell me that. Okay, because we know family,
there's nurses. But this nurse has a special certification to
work with women and men I'm assuming will have been
(03:40):
sexually assaulted.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Is that true?
Speaker 3 (03:42):
That is true. We work with women and men ages
thirteen and above, so thirteen and under is a different certification.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Okay, Oh that's so good to know.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Okay, So I just wanted to jump in from and
get your expertise.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
On well a few things.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
But you know, allegedly Cassie said that she was sexually
abused by Diddy, and she's also claiming or either the
prosecution the state is claiming that she was sexually trafficked. Okay,
so he is still on trial. We will say allegedly
allegedly allegedly, However, I know that I did see and
(04:23):
you probably did too. Nurse Noel, I did see that
video where he was physically.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
Abusing her, so that I do believe to be true.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
However, we're talking about sexual assault today, so my first
question is, and I'm just kind of going off of
the critique of other people, So just from your perspectives,
why is it do you believe that people don't come into.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
The hospital to.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
When they are sexually abused, because my assumption is, let
me just set this up. I'm sorry, my assumption is
is that people would think that if Cassie was sexually abused,
then why didn't she go to the police station, and
why didn't she go to the hospital, or however it goes.
So I'm just wondering if you could shed light on
the process and then tell us, you know, from your
(05:16):
own personal accounts with dealing with patients, why is it
that people don't come in for a treatment after being
sexually abused?
Speaker 3 (05:26):
Okay, so with sexual assault one in six women, let's
let's focus on women right now, because this is a woman.
Cassie is a woman. One in six women are They
are victims or survivors. We call them survivors. They are
survivors of an attempted or a completed sexual assault. So
(05:48):
and usually most of the women are that come in
contact with their sailants. The sailants are usually familiar to them,
so that's a high percentage. Also, so it's embarrassed. It's
what did I do? Why did I deserve this? What
did I do to make this, you know, to make
this happen? Why did I you know, why was I
(06:08):
so weak? And that's usually the consensus of most of
the sexual assault survivors.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Okay, so survivors, and so you believe that this is
why they don't seek treatment exactly. Okay, So what is
the process? What does it look like? I'm just wondering
if someone comes into your facility and we'll talk about well,
I know women and men, but if they come into
your facility, and where is it that you work, what
(06:34):
do you have saying sexual assault nurses in? Is it
the hospital? Is it in private practice? Like what does
that look like? And what does it look like for
someone to come in and see you?
Speaker 3 (06:46):
Okay, so sayings are we are employed by the county.
So this is for the district attorney. A lot of
people think that it's hospital based, but it is definitely
for the district attorney. And what anytime someone in in
an emergency room and they have sexual assault, you know,
cues that cused the physician or the nurse to call
(07:09):
the district Attorney's office or the police, you know, the authorities,
and they send us out to the specific hospital. So
I'm home and I can get a call saying, hey,
go to such and such hospital or to ABC hospital
or X y Z hospital to perform a sexual assault
nurse examiner's examination on the assault on the on the survivor.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Okay, okay, all right, so oh that's good. Okay, because
because now this lends back to a lot of women
and men victims, they don't tell. So they just may
be coming into the hospital for I don't know, a
broken knee, a broken arm, or you.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Know what I'm saying, something that happened to them.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
And as they're getting that treatment, someone in the emergency
room who's treating them, the nurse or the doctor is
noticing some certain there's some symptoms and decides and I
love that you said cues, and then they have to
make the decision to make a call. And so they call,
you say, the district attorney's office.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Call, Yes, we call the district attorneys. Well, I'm a
nurse in emergency room also, so I would call the
district attorney's office and then they would send out a
sexual assault nursing examiner.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
I got you. Okay, that's so good.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
All right, So now before you tell me about the examination,
because I'm just thinking, I'm trying to figure out is
this examination different than a regular examination? And the reason
why we're talking about this is I want anyone who's
listening to know that there is help for you. And uh, look,
(08:54):
they have a whole team of nurses who have special
training to support you. So I just feel like it's
important for us to educate the community on the support
that's out there, and hopefully this encourages them to get
treatment and to speak about it and to say something
about it. But okay, so before I ask you what
(09:19):
it looks like the examination, tell me why did you
even become certified as a saying So let.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Me let me just backtrack. I've been a nurse since
nineteen ninety eight, and being a registered nurse. You know,
my mom was a nurse, my aunt's are nurses, and
it was just a family thing. I love being a nurse. However,
in nineteen ninety I want to say nineteen ninety nine
or nineteen ninety eight. I was sexually assaulted. And I
was a baby nurse. I was I just started nursing,
(09:52):
and I was somewhere that I felt that I should
not have been. I went to someone's house. I went
to this man's house and it was midnight, and you know,
the first question is, well, what are you doing in
his house at twelve?
Speaker 1 (10:04):
You know?
Speaker 3 (10:05):
What was up? You know, and those questions and this
is I'm young, I'm young at this time. I'm inexperienced,
I'm naive, I'm a you know, a sheltered church girl.
So I didn't take those you know, those cues are
like come over, you know. And alcohol was in play.
He was drinking. I was not, And I was sexually assaulted.
I suppressed. I suppressed this. I suppressed this. You know
(10:30):
for years I did not think of it. I didn't
know it.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
So let me ask you. This is good because I
didn't even know we were going here. This is good, No,
this is good. I just wanted to say, well, I
want to ask you. I want to say sorry that
that happened to you. In addition to that, in addition
to that, I think this is good because you know,
you started off with saying, when victims come into the
(10:56):
emergency room where you see them, they have all of
these stories in their head that they're telling themselves. So
it was my fault. What was I doing there? Why
didn't I? You know, so tell us more about that.
That's that's good.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
So I you know, the first thing that I was
asked by a friend was well, what were you doing
at this man's house at twelve midnight? That is not
what we do. You knew what was up. You had
to have known. I said, I was going over there
to see a movie, to watch a movie. That's I
was so excited about this movie that I saw, and
it just sparked my interest, as you know, you know,
(11:31):
as a moviegoer. And I got the VHS tape. This
is telling you how long ago it was. I got
the VHS tape, I took it to his house, we
watched I watched it, he drank and the assault happened.
Now after I want to say, two days, I didn't
remember anything.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
Hey, family, come on over here, because I have something
for you. Starting off with a go to guide for
keeping your minds healthy and strong. This right here is
the Bible to mental health. It's your mental health Bible.
The name of it is six Pillars to power up
(12:12):
your mind and make mental health a lifestyle. Everything that
you need to know about keeping your minds healthy and
strong is.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
In this go to guide. Where you get it from?
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Will you get it from awisebrown dot com, backslash shop,
But in this go to guide, honey, in this mental
health Bible, you know what you're gonna find out. You're
gonna find out the benefits of aroma therapy and how
it can shift your mood.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
But guess what, you don't have to go anyplace.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
Else to look for you aromatherapy because your girls got you. Okay,
you can get some aromatherapy here. This is a roma therapy.
In this candle, this is called a slice of happiness.
It makes me tingle like literally makes me tingle a
slice of happiness. This is a cruelty free candle with
(13:11):
no parabins, no formaldehyde, and no known suspected carcinogenics. Now
you know, you go out here and you find these
candles that smell good, But are they good for you?
Are they good for your brain? Come on, now, get
real with yourself well, this one smells delicious.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
And it's good for you. Made with essential oils. It's
a soy candle.
Speaker 3 (13:36):
Amazing.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
You can burn it or you can just walk by
and smell it. Lord, have mercy, it's so good.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
So that's your candle, your romotherapy, which raises the dopamine
in your brain, that your natural feel good no transmitters
in your brain.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
All right, y'all.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
And oh, I'm a part of you. You're a part
of me. We are a family. We got hoodies now,
and these are unus sex hoodies and they wear well,
they wash well, and they feel so good. So you
can wear them over your clothes, you know what I'm saying,
and look dope. Or you can wear them as your
clothes with nothing under them, which I like to do often.
(14:16):
And when you travel everywhere, I mean every time I
wear them, I'm moving around, people are always asking me
whether I'm traveling, going to the supermarket, what's that?
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Who's that?
Speaker 1 (14:24):
And I'm like, mental health is a lifestyle because see
this is on the back. Okay, they come in white
and they come in black. I'm like, join the family.
Mental health is a lifestyle podcast.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
So there you go.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
Family don't you ever say then, I ain't give you nothing.
Speaker 1 (14:41):
You get all of these things from awisbrown dot com
backslash shop. All right, I got your goods. I got you.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
You don't have to go any place else.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
I'll see you on the other side. Now, why didn't
I go to the hospital. Why didn't I call the authorities? One?
I didn't know I could. I thought I would be
I thought I would be blamed.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
Yeah, So when you say I didn't know I could,
that's what I want because someone else would hear this
and say, what do you mean you didn't know you could?
You just pick up the phone and call. But it
was because of the thoughts that you had in your head,
the story you was telling yourself.
Speaker 3 (15:17):
And yes, and also I knew him. So you know,
you don't think of acquaintance rape or date rape as
a thing. You always think it's in some type of city,
you know, you know, some cit hallway or some alleyway,
and you know it's brutal, and it's not all always
like that. We see spouses, we see you know, brothers
and sisters, we see friends, we see boyfriends. You know,
(15:42):
it's it's very common.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Yeah, and what is that called that that was That
was good.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
So it's it's not just just generally when people and
I think this is what you're saying when people think
about sexual assault. Right, when you think about sexual assault,
you're thinking that it's somebody you don't know, know what
happens down a dark alley.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
You know what I mean that you know, they may whatever.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
I don't need to describe anymore because I don't want
to trigger anyone. However, what you're saying is they are
more forms of rape than that form of breath.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
And so what did you what did you What was
the name that you said?
Speaker 3 (16:16):
This was it's acquaintance rape, acquaintance assault.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Wow, acquaintance. That's good.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
So meaning that you knew him, you were familiar with him, Yes,
and that can be categorized as rape also, Yes, because
what I know for sure is I don't care what
you're doing, how you doing, how close you're doing, and
how many VHS tapes, how much music you listen to,
how much people drink. When a person says no, they
(16:46):
mean no, and it is no. And even if you
were kissing the guy, even if y'all were groping, that
still does not say yes unless you say yes you can.
You could if when you say.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
No, no means no.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
So okay, yeah, so nurse Noel. So you was in
this situation, acquaintance. Y'all were gonna watch your movie the
the abuse occurred, and then you said you felt like
you couldn't tell you couldn't call anybody because he was
an acquaintance and you felt like you were going to
be blamed.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
That is horrible.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
Okay, So you said that that memory didn't come up
till two days later. So I won't even ask you
because I'm sure people are thinking, so, now, how does
she leave out? How does she get home? How does
she and so?
Speaker 3 (17:38):
And here it is, I can tell it. I can
tell it. No, the memory, it didn't come back two
days later. I didn't. I kept the memory for only
two days and then it left for years. So that's
what I wanted to clarify. I. You know, my friend
I called. I went to a payphone outside, shirt ripped hands, rapped,
no shoes, ran outside, called Collect to one of my friends.
(18:01):
Because at that time, no one had cell phones. We
were calling on you know, on land lines. I called
her collect and I told her to call back the
number because back then, payphones had numbers. I called her.
She called back. I told her, please come get me.
Bring my other friend to come get me, and they
both came in. One drove my car home and we
(18:23):
didn't discuss it after that. We never discussed it for years.
And then it came back up. I want to say
twelve years later. Yeah, about eleven or twelve years later,
it did. The memory just came back.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Oh, that's so good.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
And a part of post traumatic stress is really well
disorder is a disassociation, so really disassociating yourself where you
kind of feel out of body, like it's an out
of body experience. And then I'm just assuming you probably
just compartmentalized it and we do that, you know, that's
(18:59):
the brain trick to kind of to not blow up,
so that you know, the brain feels like, oh if
I kind of think about this and feel like I
have to deal with this and I have to figure
it out, then I may.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Just blow up.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
So what the brain does is it kind of puts
it in a compartment to where I call them little drawers,
to where you don't have to deal with it right then,
and then you move on the surface. But wow, I'm
just imagining how that shifted your quality of life.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Oh my gosh, it.
Speaker 3 (19:30):
Said, because you know, at first, I'm like, well, why me,
why didn't I remember this? And then you know, we're
taught in psychology class that this is what happens. You know,
we memories are suppressed. We don't remember things, and certain
things can trigger them. And I don't know what triggered it.
I think it was, you know what, it was actually
(19:51):
a conversation. It was a conversation between my friend and
someone else who knew but didn't believe me. So that
came up and I said, you know what, it's time
for me to take my health into my own hands,
to get some therapy, talk about it, and write about it.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
So that helped me a lot too, right, that's so,
that's so great.
Speaker 2 (20:16):
That is great. That's great.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Okay, and thank you for sharing your story because you
have a personal account of exactly what we're talking about.
And so you said that this is the reason that
you decided that you wanted to become certified.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
Yes, yes, it is. I was working at University Hospital
in York at the time, and I a woman came
in my patient you know, I'm taking over, and she's
on a ventilator. She's on life support, and we're we're
giving over a report. And I found out that she
was sexually assaulted. How did they know she had? She
had bleeding from both orifices and she was They found
(20:55):
her underwear around her ankles. They found her head had
a blunt blunt trauma, and she was you know, she
had signs and symptoms of being sexually assaulted. So these
two women, they came in, I mean when they came in,
they came in aggressively. They came in, you know, with
their with their black light, with their you know, the
whole CSI thing, and I'm looking like, what is this?
(21:19):
I was I didn't even understand what this was. This
was after thirteen years of being a registered nurse, I've
never seen anything like it. And we got the subpoena.
They provided us with a subpoena and then they started
they went at it and then I can tell you know,
then I can tell you what we do.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
So okay, good, no, so go ahead, finish talk and
so tell us what you do. So and I just
want to know, so did you you stayed in the
room with them when they were doing Okay.
Speaker 3 (21:44):
So I honest, yeah, I asked. I was so intrigued,
like what are you doing? And they told us that
we are sexual assault nurse examiners. We're registered nurses and
we were certified to come in and do pelvic exams,
which is, you know, with the speculum. They take samples,
they do anal swabs, they check underneath finger fingernails, they
(22:05):
check the hair, They do the whole. If you've ever
watched any type of forensic show like CSI, that's what
they do. They do the whole. It's the whole gamut.
They pluck hairs off, they take pictures. You know, it's
a whole. It's a whole process. Now sayings, we are
supposed to be objective. However, because I went through it,
(22:25):
I can be a little more empathetic to the survivor.
So we but we Oh, I forgot to tell you this.
We also provide medication. So if a person comes in
and we do an examination, now this is voluntary, we
cannot do it unless we are given permission. You cannot
(22:46):
just go and put us, you know, do an examination
on someone who is not who who can give consent. Now,
my patient could not give consent, so the district attorney,
you know they had a subpoena. However, if it's like
me walking into an emergency room, I can opt to
not have an examination.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Okay, all right, so yeah, let me let me kind
of go back and clarify that.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
So you were saying, okay, when.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
You were there and someone when these nurses came in,
y'all received the subpoena. When the district attorney subpoenas you
guys to perform this, then this examination when the victim
comes in, then the victim pretty much like they don't
(23:34):
need to give consent exactly.
Speaker 2 (23:37):
Wow, that's interesting.
Speaker 3 (23:39):
But they're they're unconscious, so they can't. It's uh, you know,
if you come in unconscious. This patient was on life support.
This patient couldn't give consent. There was no next of ken.
She had heroin and cocaine in her system, so she
you know, most likely she was she was homeless. She
was found in an abandoned building, so there was no
one that could give consent. So it was over ridden
(24:00):
by the district attorney with the subpoena. And that's why
we did that.
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
I'm glad you clarified that. Because if the person, like
any other person.
Speaker 3 (24:10):
Is.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Aware of their surroundings.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Then they have to give consent before this is this
examination has taken place exactly, okay, okay, all right, and
so once they give consent and then you do it,
so and then all of that I guess that's so good.
Everything that's found right in that package. Then that package
(24:39):
is what's sent off to does the does the patient
get it or does the like who gets it?
Speaker 3 (24:44):
Yeah, the medical examiner gets all of the data and
they do that's when they do the testing. They're testing
for you know, semen on the skin, they're testing for hair,
they're testing for any skin or DNA under the nails
or anything like that. That's what they're testing.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
Okay, Oh that's good. Okay. So this so if anyone
out here has been sexually assaulted, whether it's been by
a stranger or an acquaintance, the great thing about getting
one of these examinations by a saying when you go
to the emergency room is this can be evidence to
(25:23):
prove that you were abused.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
In some way. So this is a this is a
good thing. This is a good thing.
Speaker 3 (25:30):
As women, we have been muted for so long we
are are our testimony has been suppressed and repressed for
so long that we're afraid that, you know, of judgment.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
We're afraid of judgment, yeah, afraid of judgment, yeah, from
the outside world. And so and we've seen this right like,
we've seen it before, we've seen it with in the media,
we've seen it on social media. And just like now,
even though Cass allegedly who has been sexually abused, this
(26:04):
is some years later for whatever reason and however she
handled it, whether she suppressed it or not, it took
so many years, ten years, eleven years for her to
say something, and everybody is shaming her. They're victim blaming
her and saying that she must have been a part
of it. And this is the reason why people don't
tell it something you wanted to say exactly.
Speaker 3 (26:27):
So along with you know, data collection. Because of data collection,
we also provide medication. So we give antibiotics for any
type of STIs that are bacterial, and we also give
anti retroviral medications. We give medications for herpes HIV, which
are viral viruses, and we also give medication for bacterial
(26:51):
infections such as chlamydia and things like that.
Speaker 1 (26:54):
Oh that's so good. So that means if someone comes
in and they're infected. You want to try to addres
it immediately.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
Yes, prophilactically, we get prophilactic medication. We also give Plan B,
which is you know, so we get the morning after
pill for unwanted pregnancy.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Oh that's so good. I love that. So let me
ask this for survivors or victims who are out here,
whichever you choose to call yourself, how do you approach
survivors who may be scared, confused, or reluctant to undergo
(27:32):
the exam.
Speaker 3 (27:34):
That's a hard one because everyone is different. You know,
you can't it's not every it's not a cookie cutter thing.
You have to assess the situation. And sometimes we call
the hospital psychologists, so we do refers for mental screenings
and things like that. Because we're not trained to do that,
(27:56):
so we don't do it. That's the that is the key.
We are not trained to do that, so we do
not do that because people will try.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
I got you, and so I guess the question I
was asking is, so if someone comes in and they're
scared and they're confused what you're saying.
Speaker 2 (28:16):
I love that. There's no cookie cut of answer. So
I see.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
So, if you need support from someplace else, from the
psychologist at the hospital or whatever it is.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
I mean, I guess whomever it is.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
I don't even know who else would actually come in
and help to support, to maybe make the victim feel
more comfortable if they're confused.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
So I'm wondering.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
I'm sure you if someone came in and they were confused,
you'd educate them, of course, right.
Speaker 3 (28:45):
Well, yeah, when we educate them and we talk to them,
I try not to. You know, sometimes it's hard because
you try to be empathetic, and you know, not every
patient I'm gonna say, well, you know what, I was
sexually assaulted too. But you know, sometimes it does help,
you know, it does help. We do, and sometimes the
District Attorney's office sends out people to help also, so
(29:08):
they're on staff with them with the journey.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
I got you. So to me, it sounds like what
you're saying is you did to do one job to
collect whatever the sample is that you're supposed to collect,
and that's what you do. You ain't there to coherse nobody,
You're not there to talk nobody off a ledge. I
got you, And so if someone if you need that support,
then you reach out, Okay, that's good. So let me
(29:32):
ask you this, what advice would you give to someone
who has just experienced sexual assault but it's unsure whether
they should seek medical care.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
I would definitely tell them that it's not for the
prosecution of the assailant. So a lot of people think that, oh,
I'm going to go to court, that this is why
you're joining this. It's also for your health. It's also
because we give answer rust or viral medications. It's because
we give antibiotics. It's because we give you know, treatment
for prophilogically for STIs that may have not even been
(30:11):
have come up yet. It's because we can provide the
plan B. It's not only because let's get this, let's
get this assailant. That's not that's not how we go
into it. We go into it as your health is
the number one priority. You do not want any STIs
that you do not have or you do not you
know that you don't want and you don't want an
unwanted pregnancy. So I kind of like spin it on
(30:34):
that not to be cohersive, because remember we are expert
witnesses too. Now if this goes to trial, I am
also an expert witness and I don't want to say
anything that's going to mess up my testimony or mess
you know, mess me up that I won't be able
to give objective testimony.
Speaker 2 (30:55):
You would tell them to seek medical care.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
I would tell them to seek medical care because you
can be treated. That's why you can be treated. It's
not you know, we're gonna just be writing things down,
it's will you can be treated. There's active treatment, and
it's no cost to you. So yeah, of course I tell.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
Them not okay, No, that's good.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
Okay. How can hospitals, law enforcement, or communities better support
sayings and survivors.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
Do you have an opinion on that?
Speaker 3 (31:33):
I think we need to be out in the forefront.
People don't know we exist, so there's no you know,
until it happens. I think it should be educated education
in the schools, in the community that we do exist,
and the services that we provide because they're you know,
when I tell people I'm not saying, they're like, what
is that? I've never heard of that? But yet I'm
(31:54):
talking to sexual survivors, sexual assault survivors, and I'm like,
wait a second, you don't know what we do, who
we are. And so I think with the District Attorney
with the communities. I think as a whole, they just
need to put out the word that we provide services
and who we are.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
No, that's good, I totally agree.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
So aren't there any resources that we can give to
maybe victims or survivors who could be listening here today.
Speaker 3 (32:23):
You can always go to reign dot org, r ai
n dot org, or you can text or call ninety
eight eight.
Speaker 1 (32:32):
Okay, great, I am going to put that up on
the screen so that everyone has that. And please Nurse
no wel let the family know how they can keep
up with you, how they can find you.
Speaker 3 (32:47):
You can find me on ig at official nurse no
well and you are se and O E L. I
also have a website nasenalwil dot com where you can
send in your questions and things like that, and I
do so it goes down in the dam Just DM.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
Me okay, oh that's good.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Well, thank you, my beautiful smart friend who is also
a nurse and a.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
Certified s A n e SAT.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
Thank you so much for joining me on this episode
and educating the family and family. That is another episode
of the Mental Health is a lifestyle podcast with your
Girl Andrea Wise Brown and family. I will see you
(33:40):
again next week on the next episode, but don't you
ever forget I love you.
Popular Podcasts
Fudd Around And Find Out
UConn basketball star Azzi Fudd brings her championship swag to iHeart Women’s Sports with Fudd Around and Find Out, a weekly podcast that takes fans along for the ride as Azzi spends her final year of college trying to reclaim the National Championship and prepare to be a first round WNBA draft pick. Ever wonder what it’s like to be a world-class athlete in the public spotlight while still managing schoolwork, friendships and family time? It’s time to Fudd Around and Find Out!
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.