June 25, 2025 • 47 mins
***The Asha Christina Tapes***
5 Tips To AVOID Getting Played!... In this dating, love, and relationship advice episode, I will give you the top five tips to avoid getting played when dating or in a relationship. You can feel like you're getting played after first dates while online dating or even somewhere in the dating process or relationship. If you are looking for ways to protect yourself from getting played, ensure you embrace this relationship advice and watch the entire video to get more clarity. It's important to value yourself and choose carefully whom you invest your time with to avoid getting played. Many men are out here playing games and will only heartbreak you, but I will give you the best dating tips to help you avoid getting played. Whether you're looking for love, trying to avoid toxic relationships, or want to be more mindful in your dating life, these relationship tips will help you stay grounded and protect your heart. I want you to understand why you get played and know how to avoid getting played, so you can enjoy your dating experiences and have successful relationships. By implementing these relationship tips, you will be smart and protect yourself from getting played. Pay attention to this dating help and learn how to avoid getting played. I'm Just a girl who's trying to build a longer table instead of a fence. My goal is to help you transform your life with my combination of personal development, human psychology, sophistication, and inner and outer beauty tips. This video will give you clarity if you are asking the following questions or looking for;
C O N N E C T W I T H M E:
@ashachristinafoster
Have a Question ? or N E E D A D V I C E?
Let me be here for you! Whether you need some self-love advice or dating tips, I got you!
5 Tips To AVOID Getting Played!... In this dating, love, and relationship advice episode, I will give you the top five tips to avoid getting played when dating or in a relationship. You can feel like you're getting played after first dates while online dating or even somewhere in the dating process or relationship. If you are looking for ways to protect yourself from getting played, ensure you embrace this relationship advice and watch the entire video to get more clarity. It's important to value yourself and choose carefully whom you invest your time with to avoid getting played. Many men are out here playing games and will only heartbreak you, but I will give you the best dating tips to help you avoid getting played. Whether you're looking for love, trying to avoid toxic relationships, or want to be more mindful in your dating life, these relationship tips will help you stay grounded and protect your heart. I want you to understand why you get played and know how to avoid getting played, so you can enjoy your dating experiences and have successful relationships. By implementing these relationship tips, you will be smart and protect yourself from getting played. Pay attention to this dating help and learn how to avoid getting played. I'm Just a girl who's trying to build a longer table instead of a fence. My goal is to help you transform your life with my combination of personal development, human psychology, sophistication, and inner and outer beauty tips. This video will give you clarity if you are asking the following questions or looking for;
- Tips to void getting played
- Getting played
- Avoid getting played
- How to avoid getting played
- Online dating
- How to stop getting played
- Why you get played
- How to not get played
- Get played
- Played
- Avoid being played
- Stop getting played
- Dating help
- Relationship advice
- Relationship help
C O N N E C T W I T H M E:
@ashachristinafoster
Have a Question ? or N E E D A D V I C E?
Let me be here for you! Whether you need some self-love advice or dating tips, I got you!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello, my beautiful angels, Welcome back to my channel for
all my new subscribers. Welcome to the A Team. My
name is Asha. Very nice to meet you. We are
very happy to have you join us.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Guys.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Today's topic is heavy on my heart. You know, when
I woke up this morning, it was very heavy on
my heart. One of my subscribers had DMed me. I
believe heading is Abby Lee, and she actually requested that
I do this video, and when I woke up, I
ended up thinking about it and actually.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
A mini story time.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
I'll say, you know, I'll get in Della later of
what also triggered me to want to make this video.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
But before we.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Get into it, of course, make sure that you guys
are following me on Instagram and that will be right here.
And also do not forget to subscribe to this channel.
If we are not already, we would love to have
you join the A Team. I do lots of advice
on dating relationships, and there's.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Going to be beauty tutorials, there's gonna be look bucks, There's.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
Gonna be so much more exciting content waiting for you guys,
So make sure that you do not miss that. To
ensure that you guys are notified every time that I post,
be sure to click the notification a belt down below. Okay,
because we don't want to miss anything, and without further ado.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Let's get into the video.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
As you guys can see from the title, this video
is going to be about five tips to avoid getting played.
This is a very very good topic to talk about,
and honestly, really timely, so, like I said in the
beginning of the video, I did want to give you guys.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
A quick story time.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
I will post a thorough story time in regards to
this at a later time. But basically, a guy that
I was seeing had DMed me and congratulated me, and
I was saying, you know what for And it was
because he found a online profile of me and it
(02:08):
said that I was a law student and I'm not
a law student, and that was the reason why he
was congratulating me. And personally, I took that in a
way because I felt like, you follow me, you see
everything that I'm doing, You saw that I started my channel.
You don't participate in liking or engaging in any of that,
(02:31):
but you're only congratulating me because you think that I'm
doing something that you deem as a real career and
he's an attorney, so I guess what I do isn't
real for him. And I was just thinking to myself,
you know, this guy just I you know, when I
met him, I wasn't in the best of place, and
(02:53):
so coming out of that, I've learned so much. You know,
I don't regret the experience at all, because it taught
me so much about myself what I should and shouldn't accept.
And honestly, all the experiences that I have endured and
gone through in my life better equipped me to help
you ladies and to help you guys avoid the.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Mistakes that I've made.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
And when I look back with all the knowledge that
I have now, I realized so many things that I
did were just wrong. And the signs were clearly there
that he was basically playing games, and I didn't take
heed to them, you know, So that was definitely a
major issue. And he actually did also text me on
(03:38):
Christmas Day, but I didn't even have his number because
I deleted his number, and.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
He basically was insinuating.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
That now that I knew who it was, why didn't
I like give him more of a warmer welcome when
I when he finally told me like, oh, it's me
and I was just like no, because you were playing games.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
And I think that what.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
I did and what a lot of us do, is
justify guys' actions. You know, we let the good times
outweigh the bad, but we have to weigh the reality
that sometimes the bad is more than the good. And
some people are just completely incapable of seeing themselves and
(04:22):
they are, you know, victims.
Speaker 2 (04:26):
Okay, that's what you call a victim.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
You know people in life that are jaded by their
experiences and they go so hard to prevent those things
that they actually manifest just exactly that and they actually
become the person that hurt them. And I cannot let
you ladies do that. That's why I always say, yes,
(04:49):
you're gonna go through things in life, but do not
ever let it jade you because you don't want to
be that person. That is the reason why someone becomes jade.
You want to just give everyone a fair chance, and
it's actually very easy to do.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
It's just like falling in love. You have to love
like you've never been hurt before.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
In life, there are going to be things that tear
you down, that break you their will, but you have
to overcome those things. That's what makes a strong person,
and that's what's going to separate you from those jaded people,
those toxic people who don't deal with their emotions, you know,
who detach themselves and are completely incapable of actually being
(05:33):
happy in life. Right, So I don't even want to
get too much into that. I'm definitely going to make
a story time on that because I know that a
lot of the times we glamorize this lifestyle of dating
wealthy men, valuing yourself, dating guys that actually can provide
for you, invest in you, and you know, being smarter,
(05:58):
leveling up all of these things. But it's not an
easy journey and I and I don't want to skip that,
and I don't want to, you know, portray per se
that it's all one, two three.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Do this, do this, do this, because it's definitely not.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
So I'm definitely gonna make a story time on you know,
and a video. I guess I will combine the two
on the you know, the dark side of you know,
this sort of lifestyle, you know, just and even dating
you know, your regular Joe Schmo. He there's gonna be
(06:34):
cons that come with him too. But that's not even
really where I'm gearing at. So I need to make
a video on that. Okay, ladies.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
So now that I've gotten that little spiel out of
the way.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Let's get into the tips. Let's get into the reason
why you clicked on this video.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Tip number one. Okay.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
And I wrote all these things down, you guys know,
gotta write things down. Mental stability. So this is definitely
a number one thing, ladies. Mental stability is so important
because even in the example that I gave in the
in the beginning of the video, I wasn't mentally at
(07:11):
my best. So you do things, you accept certain things,
you behave a certain way. You are not you. You
are not the best version of yourself, all right. And
I say you are not you for the simple fact
that I consider myself to be, you know, a forever
(07:31):
evolving being a student of life.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Okay, So.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Who you met, you know, who you met two months ago,
whatever the case, that's not who I am today. I'm
always changing for the better, you know, I'm always and
especially because I wasn't in the best of place, you know,
for majority of this year.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
I wasn't.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
I'm not perfect, and that's how I'm able to help
others through my experiences and learning from that and admitting that.
And I am humbled by my experiences and I'm glad
that I have them. It's very easy to regret certain things,
but I learned that the number one thing to avoid
getting played ladies, is your mental stability. Nothing else will
(08:19):
matter if you do not know yourself, Nothing else will matter.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
If you don't value yourself.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
If you don't know your value, somebody else will tell
you your value and it will be lower than it
actually is. You know, men are always testing your value.
Or let me see what I could get away with
her with this, let me try this, Let's.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
See if she'll be down if we do this. That's
just innate to them.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Don't be offended by it at this point, you know,
That's just how men are. They're always testing your value.
It is up to you to make that decision of up.
I'm not going to accept that.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
Up. No, I don't think so, No, try again? Up? Leave?
Speaker 1 (09:02):
Okay, you know, and even to tie it back into
my you know experience, you know, with dating that guy,
I didn't really you know, value myself as much as
I thought I did. There wasn't really much that I
cared about. So I allowed him to do certain things
(09:23):
because I accepted it.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
So I am allowing it. You know, he could never
now he couldn't.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
Okay, And you, just like I always say to you, guys,
you have to leave people where they are because sometimes
you argue people down. You explain, explain, explain, and they
still don't get it, and that is called wasting your time.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
You can say your piece.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
Let whoever think whatever, do better, be better, never bitter.
That's all I have to say about that, okay. Tip
number two, Express your needs and desires. Express your needs
and desires from the beginning, ladies, like for example, you
can mention when you guys are talking. You know, I
(10:13):
really just find it very attractive when a man is
able to provide for a woman. It's just something that
I find very sexy because you want to gauge his
response to see what he's gonna say to that, to
see if he's gonna say, well, of course, I believe
that men.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Should always be providing for the woman.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
Or he'll say something like cool or nice or interesting.
Now you're wasting your time if that's the response to that,
you're wasting your time because you're gauging and you're testing. Okay, hmm,
what does he think about how I intend on actually living?
You know, like, Okay, if you don't set the tone
(10:53):
from the beginning, guys will overlook and disregard ignore anything
that you try to implement further on in the relationship
because he's going to continue to ignore it because it's
benefiting him. Because you didn't set the tone in the
beginning of the relationship, they're going to continue to benefit
off of what you failed to mention and enforce. It's
(11:17):
just that cut and dry. I really need you, ladies,
to date with.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
A purpose, okay, because he sure is all right.
Speaker 1 (11:27):
You know, whatever you tolerate within the first couple of
months sets the tone for the rest of the relationship.
Because if in the first few months, you know, if
your low budget bridget, you know, no offense to anyone
named Bridget, then why should he all of a sudden
(11:48):
get you anything else that you ask for of more value.
If you didn't set that tone, he's going to look
at you. Even though he feels like, oh, she probably
likes and she probably likes that, he's going to feel like, well,
I didn't have to do that when I got you
in the beginning.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
So why should I have to do that? Now? Do
you understand that mentality? That's that's that's how they're thinking.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
And I'm genuinely telling you it will be nearly impossible
to try to implement any sort of change or improvement
if you step into this thing, letting this guy show
you minimal effort in you know, attempt to, you know,
because you want to prove that you are not this way,
(12:28):
and you don't want him to think of you that way.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
And you really like him, so you really don't want
him to leave you.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
Now, whoever's going to leave is going to leave regardless, Okay,
because at the end of the day, who you truly
are will come out.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
You can't hide from who you truly are.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
But for so long, you know, if you are someone
that is high maintenance, I e. Myself, I can't downplay that,
you know, to you know, because I'm afraid that he's
to think I'm a gold digger.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Oh my god, she's gonna just walk away. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
If it's intimidating, it's intimidating, and that means I'm not
for you and you're not for me either.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
Next.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Okay, Tip Number three is have a roster, Ladies, this
is so important.
Speaker 2 (13:20):
Why Because men.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
Have a roster, they are not wiping you up and
cutting off every other connection they have in a few dates.
You are single until you are in a committed relationship period.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Know two ways about it.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
Okay, It's also important to have a roster because you
don't want to get attached to one guy. This is
really important in effort to not getting played. Guys do
this innately, right, So guys, are you know if you're
acting up, they're hitting up Becca, Tricia, Catherine. They're like, oh, whatever,
(14:06):
she doesn't want to meet me tonight. She wants to,
you know, have a little attitude. Okay, Well I have
like ten other girls I can hit up in my
phone in this lineup, I'm not worried about her. That's
why it's so easy for, you know, guys to ignore
your text messages, or leave you on red, lead you
on scene, all of these things, and it hurts your
feelings and you try to, you know, show him loyalty
(14:28):
that he doesn't deserve. And ladies, I'm speaking from experience.
I was that way at some point, you know, And
even though I always I thought I was confident you know,
and I thought that I'm doing the right thing by proving, oh,
I'm only talking to you. Oh I'm showing I'm showing
my unwavering loyalty. The message that I'm sending across to
(14:49):
him is good. Got her on lockdown, and I know
I could definitely do whatever I want because I'm doing
it now and she's still here and she doesn't even
really know, and I don't even think she really did.
She probably wouldn't really ca I could probably get myself
out of this because I know she really likes me,
and I know that she's only with me. They love
hearing that it feeds their ego. Yes, we want to
feed their egos. Men love for their egos to be stroked.
(15:11):
But we're not doing it in that way. Okay, you're
not giving them that satisfaction. Also, genuinely, we're not doing that.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Okay. All right.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
So having multiple candidates in your roster is very important.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
The key to that do not be physically intimate with
any of them.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
That is the key.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
You know so many times with data, and it's very
easy to do, especially when you're not dating just one person,
you're dating multiple people. You cannot you should not be
doing this with any of them. You know, if you
are someone that is having, you know, sex before marriage,
(15:56):
if that's the route that you're taking, you know, I
don't don't normally like to advise people really on when
to be intimate with people, but if I had to,
because I know that people love answers and they want
to know, it's certainly not before four months of consistency courting. Okay,
gifts favors being there for you genuinely, if in your
(16:23):
roster you have a guy that has significantly made it
to the top, okay, because he's done all these things,
he has passed all these tests, he has been consistent,
made effort to see you, okay, invested in you. If
that's the route you want to go, then you can
(16:43):
start considering that right. And for my ladies that you
know are Christian and they are saving themselves till marriage,
I would actually specifically try my best to date men
that have the same belae leaves because then you won't
feel the pressure of.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Worrying about how do I tell him.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
That I don't that i'm you know that I want
to wait till marriage, I'm a virgin, all these things.
It's best to date someone that has similar values as
you do, right, because in the end, you can like
this person all you want, but if he feels strongly
you know about well, I don't really believe in that.
(17:29):
I don't really think that that matters. And it doesn't
really matter because we really like each other and we
really have a connection. So why should we wait. We
already know that we like each other and we've already
spent you know, five months together.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
Don't do it.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
If this is your decision, that is your decision, babe.
And for whoever is looking for a sign because somebody
needs to see this, do not do it. It is
your choice and you made the decision to stick by
your faith.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
You made the decision. You made that vow to God,
do not break that.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
There is going to be someone that will respect that.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
That's it. I had to get that out there. I'll
tell you that much. Okay. But for my ladies that
already are you know, doing this.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
You can still value yourself by not you know, busting
it open globally.
Speaker 2 (18:23):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
The main reason ladies, that we as women feel so
you know, used and just cheated is.
Speaker 2 (18:33):
Because there's no reciprocity.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
We feel like we gave more than we received. Right,
That's why sometimes you feel heartbroken. Oh I tried to
show him that I was a loyal person. Been there,
done that. It doesn't work. It doesn't work like that.
If you were courted, treated, correctly, invested in gifts, trips,
(18:57):
all these things to compensate for your time, you wouldn't
necessarily feel cheated, right, does that make sense?
Speaker 2 (19:08):
You only feel that.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Way when when you look back and you realize, oh
my gosh, you know I could have gotten more. There
was barely any effort given. I was the one that
was always proving myself, proving my worth. I don't think so, right,
And if that's what you have been doing, it ends today.
Speaker 2 (19:32):
It's done today. Tip number four is very important.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
I mean to be honest, All of these tips are
equally very very important. You know, period emotional insurance. Okay, ladies,
emotional insurance.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
I'm gonna call it. You know. Quality Queen's right, I
E myself, I.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
E E you your equality, queen. Quality Queens require emotional insurance.
Speaker 2 (20:07):
Period. Don't ever in your life give your prize or
begin to give your prize to any man who doesn't
pass any of these tests of investing, like I.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
Said, courting you, taking you on dates, you know, favors
for you, showing up you know, if you need him.
If you're tire, you know, if you have a flat tire?
Is he there for you? Is he making time you
know to speak to you. Is he calling you on
the phone and not trying to be a texting buddy
because a lot of these times it's very easy to be,
(20:44):
you know, you know, a cheating chase. Okay, if you
are just texting girls, you're going down your list.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
All you do is really text them all day.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
When you have a phone call with him, he's investing time. Now,
how often is he calling you? And also pay attention
to things like this because sometimes they start off wanting
to talk to you on the phone, and then you
will gradually see that the relationship becomes solely texting now
(21:16):
and barely any phone calls.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
That matters.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
Phone calls matter, right, You do not want a texting
relationship and a texting buddy.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
I am not your pen pal.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
And plus you want to ensure that he's setting aside
time to actually be on the phone with you and
be engaged talking to you. We are not penpals. You
need to know with this emotional insurance, all these months
of dating him, investing in you, him courting you, treating
you respectfully, him being consistent in his efforts with you,
(21:51):
calling you on a consistent basis, communicating with.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
You very well.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
That will kind of show you, you know, whether or
not he's capable of commitment.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
It will.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
You know, and worst case scenario, if it doesn't, you
gain the experience, right, and you were treated exceptionally well,
and for whatever reason it.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Doesn't work out, you move on to the next person. Right.
Speaker 1 (22:19):
I promise you if some of you could take back
the physical investment you know from those guys that you
no longer deal with, you wouldn't even feel as.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
Cheated, you know, by them.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
So they're lacking reciprocity, and you invested physically in them,
sharing moments that you thought were special, and to them
it was like whatever.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
They don't care if it is or if it isn't,
if it comes where it goes.
Speaker 1 (22:49):
You wouldn't even really be that sad over that guy,
because a lot of the times it's not that we're
specifically sad over the guy.
Speaker 2 (22:56):
I want you, ladies to think about this.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
You are set because of the physical investment, that's number one.
A lot of ladies do this right. It's kind of
like I think Cardi B mentioned it one time where she.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
Said, when you.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Are intimate with somebody and let's say that ended, instead
of going and being intimate with somebody else, you go
back to someone else so that you don't add another
guy to your you know, I don't know your arsenal whatever.
My point is, if you didn't invest physically in this person,
(23:32):
and you know, matter of factly because you think very clearly,
it's very easy to ignore signs from someone when you've
already invested in them physically.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
But think about it, Ladies.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
When you are dating, you know a guy, and let's
say two weeks have gone by and he kind of
sets something that pissed you off, and you're just thinking, okay, well,
I don't even really care or I.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
Don't even really to accept this, like what's up with that?
Speaker 1 (24:02):
You know by done with him. But then let's say
another guy. You were already intimate with. That guy within
the first two weeks he says something to piss you off,
and it's kind of like you don't even understand why
you feel like you want to give this person another chance.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
You don't even understand that.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
You're just thinking like, oh, oh my god, but I
really do like him, but really subconsciously because us as women,
we put a lot of value, as we should, into
our you know, intimate experiences with guys. Guys don't normally
(24:37):
do that initially like we do. And lastly, tip number
five this is huge. Ladies do not ever confuse commitment
with companionship.
Speaker 2 (24:56):
This is so huge.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
Men primarily date woman for sex, at least initially.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
We all know this. This is not up for discussion.
I don't want negotiate with you. It is what it is.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
It's a matter of a fact, and us as women,
we date for companionship. So when you put these two together, boom,
all of a sudden, you have friends with benefits. You know,
he's benefiting from you because he's getting what he wants
and you feel like he's, you know, your companion, and
you're spending a lot of time with him. So now
you just have a situation that you didn't really intend
(25:31):
on getting into.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
I don't think so.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
When you combine hanging out with someone daily, doing everyday things,
getting closer with this person, you know, getting familiar with
this person, and then you add sex to that.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
You're going to assume that you're.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
In some sort of relationship or commitment with that person.
And can we please stop justifying this with men? Ladies,
get specific answers out of these men.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Please, what are we doing? What are we this is?
Speaker 1 (26:15):
Why do not allow him to pressure you or force
you into, you know, being intimate with him, because he's
so quick to do that, but he doesn't want a
commitment with that. Sorry, that comes with commitment, Like what
do you expect?
Speaker 2 (26:31):
You do this?
Speaker 1 (26:32):
I do what you say and then basically I send
the message across of well I already did it, and
you know, I guess like maybe he'll like me more,
maybe he won't see someone else now because he likes
me more. No, now you are a part of the list.
You're a part of the list, and yeah, he'll see
you for a couple more weeks. He might see you
(26:54):
for another month, but he's still seeing those other people.
You didn't really set a ground rule of you're not
doing anything until I know that I know that, I
know that I'm going to get a commitment. You know,
I kind of made a jingle that I want you
ladies to think about you know, it's.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Like, no, no, no, you won't. You will not play me.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
If you don't, I promise you just wait out and see.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
You know, do not let these men play you ever. Ever.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
I'm teaching you ladies the game because I know what
it feels like to be hurt and it sucks. I
know what it feels like when you did all these
things and you basically gave him, you know, wife privileges,
and you know, out of the genuineness of your heart,
you were trying to show him that you are a
good person. And some men tend to manipulate you into
(27:54):
proving your worth because you know that they're very jaded
and they have, you know, a low opinion of women,
so maybe in their head they justify it by this
is why I don't commit to one person, because when
I did XX and next happen to me.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
Shut up, get over yourself. You were grown, Okay.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
We don't have time for people who do not deal
with their toxicity, with their emotions.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
And with their issues. Leave that.
Speaker 1 (28:21):
In twenty eighteen, twenty nineteen, it is no longer allowed.
It should be illegal for people to not deal and
men specifically to not deal with their emotions. And justify
it by treating women any type of way. It's you know,
to make an excuse of why they are afraid to
(28:44):
commit to you.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
That's just a lie.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
That's a justification to hold you on a rope without
getting anything definite. Be very careful of guys that you
cannot get anything definite out of them. You can't get
a yes, you can't get to know. It's always an
in between. It's always a ah, maybe, oh I think so, no,
(29:08):
yes or no.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
That's it, period. I don't care.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
There are no two ways about this, and this is
very important, crucial information ladies.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Definite answers matter. Okay, so back to what I was saying.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
If your off topic a little bit, When you combine
you know, your want for companionship with his want for
you know, just sex, next thing you know you signed
up for, you know, you signed a contract whether you
knew it or not for Hi, I'll be friends of
benefits with you. And in his head he's thinking, all right, well,
good now I don't have to deal with committing to
(29:47):
her anymore because I already know that she's signed up
for this. Men like to play on your naiveness sometimes
a lot of the time and what they know already
that you know you may be looking for.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
They will play on.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
That ignorance and act as if they had no idea
because you simply didn't mention it. And so in their
head they're thinking, well, you never mentioned that you wanted
to be in a.
Speaker 2 (30:14):
Relationship, you know.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Initially when we started this, which honestly you shouldn't even either,
because you don't want to scare them away. But the
point is you shouldn't be giving them these wifey privileges
and you know, sleeping with them, and they've done next
to nothing for that, and then you want to have
demands on them after In their head, like I mentioned
(30:39):
in previous points, why should they do more for you
now when they didn't have to do that in the beginning.
You know, when they realize early on how little effort
that they have to put in, Oh god, it's a
green light. They're going to you know, you know, you
give them an end, so they're going to take, you know,
one hundred miles.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
Do you understand that.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
I need you guys to understand that, babe, it's not
a relationship. I get a lot of dms, and you know,
I want you all to know and you know, genuinely,
no question that you guys have is a stupid question.
I you know, sometimes no matter how obvious things may seem,
it helps to hear an outside perspective, and it helps
(31:24):
to hear someone state the obvious, sometimes out.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Loud to you.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
I get a lot of dms of girls you know saying,
you know, Asha, what do I do?
Speaker 2 (31:34):
You know?
Speaker 1 (31:35):
I was with this guy, I slept with him, and
now he just wants to be friends?
Speaker 2 (31:39):
What do I do? Move on?
Speaker 1 (31:42):
Because he's not going to change what he wants with you.
He already got something from you. Why should he go
back to trying to get a commitment to get something
that he already had.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
Does that make sense?
Speaker 1 (31:55):
And it's really just honestly quite amazing how men function,
because they will beg and beg and beg and be
the best person, the best person, you know.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
I hear all these stories of.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Guys being, you know, the Knight and shining armor, and
right when you know, you give it up and I
give it up too soon? Specifically, they change, you know.
I'm gonna read something for you, guys that I saw
on Instagram that's very important. You ladies need to check
out this Instagram. I mean, wow, this instagram teaches everything that.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
I promote mainly on this channel.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
I absolutely love this instagram and I will of course
be linking this down below because I can't. I don't
want to take credit for you know, something that someone
else said, but it says the biggest difference.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
I'm gonna read it off my iPad.
Speaker 1 (32:51):
The biggest difference between woman and a man is that
he experiences sex as a legitimate physical need, just as
your body tells.
Speaker 2 (32:59):
You when you're hungry or thirsty.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
His sexual desires are determined by biological factors like the
presence of testosterone in his body. The physical need for
sexual release intensifies as you know, like I guess the
sperm builds in the testicles. I say that scientifically, so
(33:22):
hopefully this thing doesn't get flagged after you know, he
reaches that you know peak, He's satisfied momentarily, right, but
then the clock ticks on and it's and then he
starts all over again. It's a never ending cycle. As women,
(33:42):
we do not experience the physiological drive for sex in
the same way as men. There is no build up
that demands release. Women's sexual desires are connected to our
emotions and hormonal factors like ministruation, ovulation, pregnancy, metopause, etc.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
It is not a physical need for us. A man
can experience sexual arousal apart from any.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
Emotional attachment. He can look at a naked woman and
feel the intense physical desire for her, while at the
same time he may be completely devoted to and in
love with his wife. Men can separate sex from a relationship,
while for a woman the two are usually intertwined.
Speaker 2 (34:39):
I know you ladies can relate to this.
Speaker 1 (34:42):
That is because a woman's desire for sex is still
linked to an emotional or relational need, while a man's
desire for sex is primarily connected to a physiological and
biological need. This is why men and women operate the
way that they do. I really hope that makes sense it,
(35:04):
you know, it just really gives so much clarity, you know.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
And then in.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
Another post, you Know it goes on to say that
immediately after you know, a man reaches that peak, he
goes into a stage called refractory period, which causes him
to lose complete arousal and simulation, and a chemical called prolactin,
which suppresses dopamine. Dopamine is a feel good hormone for
(35:30):
those of you that don't know, is then released into
the brain, causing men.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
To lose complete interest in the woman.
Speaker 1 (35:37):
This is why it's so easy for men to you know,
bang you one night and literally.
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Not speak to you the day after. Right, It's like
to bring it to draw it home.
Speaker 1 (35:50):
It's like, Ah, I'm so hungry you eat the next day,
You're not thinking about yesterday. I was so hungry and
I had you know, that fruit. You're not thinking about that.
You're moving on.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
Okay, I'm hungry again. What am I gonna eat today?
You understand? Does that make sense? Ah? God? That hit?
Speaker 1 (36:07):
So men tend to pull away and become distant. So
this is why if the man isn't emotionally invested in you,
and women neglect to establish an emotional bond, emotional insurance
and connection before physical intimacy. This is why men ghost
(36:31):
women after sex.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
This is why. This is simply why God, oh my goodness.
You know.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
And as for us women, we release you know, a
bonding love hormone called oxidosin, which causes you to bond
and get attached to your partner.
Speaker 2 (36:49):
Why, which is why it says.
Speaker 1 (36:50):
Here women want to you know, cuddle, you know, after
you know intimacy, you know, and like I said, men
release that hormone prolactin which stimilates a feeling of disinterest
and detachment.
Speaker 2 (37:05):
Right.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
And it also goes on to say, I mean this
page literally you would think I created it myself or
I contributed to some of these posts.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
You know.
Speaker 1 (37:16):
Of course, there isn't anything in life that we will
all one hundred percent agree with, but for the majority,
this page is just on point.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
And again it will be in the description box below.
Speaker 1 (37:26):
I had to read you know, that excerpt for you guys,
because that.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
Really explains and articulates.
Speaker 1 (37:35):
Exactly how and why men act the way that they do.
And this is why time invested matters.
Speaker 2 (37:47):
Men do not. They avoid it all.
Speaker 1 (37:50):
Costs, investing time, right, investing, investing in things so they
know that when they do, they don't want to just
give that up because they've invested too much. That's why
you will have guys who will entertain a new relationship,
but they're still back and forth between their ex girlfriend
(38:13):
or their you know, baby mother, or maybe their ex
wife or maybe a girl that they you know, had
relations with off and on for multiple years. It's because
they've invested so much in that person they can't just
let it go.
Speaker 2 (38:33):
It's not possible.
Speaker 1 (38:34):
When men invest so much, it's not easy for them
to let go, because, for one, it's not easy for
men to invest in the first place.
Speaker 2 (38:42):
Right, Okay, And you know, also, I was reading.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
Something I think it's also from that instagram where they
compared you.
Speaker 2 (38:52):
Know, the situation.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
Again, we're talking about point number five of do not
confuse companionship with commitment. They were comparing the situation to
a homeowner and a renter. So a homeowner, of course,
has more responsibilities and a commitment than a renter who
(39:16):
can call a place his own temporarily without the baggage
of an actual commitment or investment.
Speaker 2 (39:25):
WHOA wow, did you hear that? Rewind and play that again.
Do not be rented. Do not be rented.
Speaker 1 (39:38):
You are not something that's a temporary investment. That is
not who you are. This isn't a showroom. We are
not picking up pieces of whatever we like and putting
it back when we're done. We are without actually investing.
We are not doing that.
Speaker 2 (39:56):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (39:57):
And an effort to avoid this type of you know situation,
this is why you need to set guidelines and expiration dates. Okay,
he doesn't do this by X amount of time, I'm out.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
You know.
Speaker 1 (40:09):
If he, you know, doesn't meet this standard, I'm done.
And there are no two ways about it. It's just
as simple as let's say a man's goal was simply
to not be in a relationship with you. Some guys
will tell you right off the bat, and congrats to
those men because they give you the option and the choice.
Some men will dance around, you know, in every little
(40:31):
nook and cranny that they can, to confuse you and
make you always feel like it's a time issue what
you want, and in time he'll get there, and in
time he will commit, and enough he doesn't want it.
That's why you have men out there who will waste
their time, you know, you know, treating the woman that
(40:52):
he was with for multiple years any sort of way
and never even really commit to her, and then he'll
meet someone in six months and marry her. So for men,
they don't really run on time, which is why they
have no problem trying to sleep with you within an
hour of meeting you, within a day of meeting you.
(41:15):
It's a physiological and biological need for them. Which is
why they can detach and disconnect effortlessly right after they
get what they want. So I really really hope.
Speaker 2 (41:29):
That you ladies have enjoyed this video, this topic.
Speaker 1 (41:33):
You know, when I was writing the treatment for it,
I really put my heart and soul into this because
this really resonated with me.
Speaker 2 (41:42):
This topic.
Speaker 1 (41:43):
I strongly urge you guys to in any time you're
feeling doubts and you don't know watch my videos. I
genuinely want to help as many people as I can
because I've been there.
Speaker 2 (42:00):
You are not alone. I've been there.
Speaker 1 (42:02):
I know what it feels like when you feel played
and you don't know who to talk to about it,
and you know or you accept certain things.
Speaker 2 (42:13):
Number one, Ladies, like I mentioned in this video.
Speaker 1 (42:16):
You have to be mentally stable or nothing else matters.
The rest of the tips that I gave after tip
number one do not matter if you do not have
mental stability, because you will accept things you shouldn't accept.
You will do things you wouldn't normally do, and you
(42:38):
will behave as though you normally wouldn't behave if you
were in a better mindset. And this sucks to hear
because some people think, oh, I can grow with this person,
and I want this person to show me XX and X.
At the end of the day, we have to accept
our truth and sometimes even in these sort of situations
(42:59):
that we find ourselves in, like myself right where I
learned so much because I realized I wasn't where I
am now, and I learned so much and I've matured
so much. And because of that, I don't need to prove,
you know, to this person and that person that I'm
(43:19):
worthy of being with or let me show you that I'm.
Speaker 2 (43:22):
Loyal to you.
Speaker 1 (43:23):
Why am I showing you that I'm loyal to you?
Are you showing that to me? Why am I trying
to show you that I'm committed to you when you're
doing your own thing and men love making you feel
as though you're the only one.
Speaker 2 (43:39):
They're good at that. Right.
Speaker 1 (43:43):
Even Futures said it in his song I know how
to make the girls go crazy when you treat them
like your number one baby or lady.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
One of those.
Speaker 1 (43:54):
Yes, men have mastered that skill, and they always want
to know they I don't like cutting things off because
they always want to know they can come back.
Speaker 2 (44:02):
I use this term very loosely.
Speaker 1 (44:04):
This is just an example, because there are great men
out there, ladies.
Speaker 2 (44:07):
Men are not all you know, dogs or bad.
Speaker 1 (44:11):
There are great men out there, right, we just have
to learn the game and get the ones that we
want to do what we want, period.
Speaker 2 (44:25):
Okay, men, let's just say men.
Speaker 1 (44:27):
Are like, uh, like dogs, right. They bury their bones girls,
in this specific example, they bury their bones and then
they like to come back whenever they feel like it
and dig them up again.
Speaker 2 (44:42):
Ready to play with you now, ready to eat this? Now?
Speaker 1 (44:46):
I don't think so. You were not a bone to
be picked. You were not a doll on a shelf.
You were not you know, an article of clothing in
a showroom. You are a quality queen. Don't ever forget it.
Don't ever forget it. Okay, And again, of course, I'm
(45:07):
so humbled by the rapid growth of this channel and
all the support that you ladies have shown me.
Speaker 2 (45:15):
You know, it is just so surreal.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
And I say it every video because I feel like
I'm living in a dream and it just means so
much to me. You know, you guys, I'm growing along
with you, guys. I'm not perfect, and I'm on this
journey too. I'm on this level of journey still it
never ends, you know, but I want to hold you
(45:42):
guys hand. I want to be there for you guys,
right And I do get a lot of dms, which
you know is amazing.
Speaker 2 (45:50):
So I'm thinking that.
Speaker 1 (45:53):
Maybe some days I'll go live and you guys can
ask me some questions live, and when I do that,
I will post it on my YouTube wall so that
you guys can. You guys are notified of when I
decide to go live or whatever it is that I'm
about to do. So, guys, that is the end of
this video. Thank you so much for watching. If you
(46:15):
guys have made it to the end of this video,
I want you guys to comment down below with a
lipstick emoji. Comment down below the lipstick emoji. That way
I know that you watch the video in its entirety,
and I genuinely hope that you do, because I also
get a lot of ladies who DM me and they
(46:38):
ask me questions that I have literally answered in my
uh in my videos, or I will get comments to
questions that I've answered in that specific video. You know,
I'm not upset about it, but all I ask is
that you guys actually watched the videos in its entirety.
Or that you read the description box in its entirety
(46:59):
as well, because I do put a lot of effort
into my description box, writing these video treatments out for
you guys, because I want you guys to have the
best information as possible.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
So I just had to put that this thing right
in there. Okay. So, like I said, that is the
Ends video. I'm so coughing why okay, guys.
Speaker 1 (47:22):
So I love you and God loves you, and I'll
see you guys in my next video.
Speaker 2 (47:26):
I love you Angel so much. Wo
Hello, my beautiful angels, Welcome back to my channel for
all my new subscribers. Welcome to the A Team. My
name is Asha. Very nice to meet you. We are
very happy to have you join us.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Guys.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Today's topic is heavy on my heart. You know, when
I woke up this morning, it was very heavy on
my heart. One of my subscribers had DMed me. I
believe heading is Abby Lee, and she actually requested that
I do this video, and when I woke up, I
ended up thinking about it and actually.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
A mini story time.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
I'll say, you know, I'll get in Della later of
what also triggered me to want to make this video.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
But before we.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Get into it, of course, make sure that you guys
are following me on Instagram and that will be right here.
And also do not forget to subscribe to this channel.
If we are not already, we would love to have
you join the A Team. I do lots of advice
on dating relationships, and there's.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Going to be beauty tutorials, there's gonna be look bucks, There's.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
Gonna be so much more exciting content waiting for you guys,
So make sure that you do not miss that. To
ensure that you guys are notified every time that I post,
be sure to click the notification a belt down below. Okay,
because we don't want to miss anything, and without further ado.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Let's get into the video.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
As you guys can see from the title, this video
is going to be about five tips to avoid getting played.
This is a very very good topic to talk about,
and honestly, really timely, so, like I said in the
beginning of the video, I did want to give you guys.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
A quick story time.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
I will post a thorough story time in regards to
this at a later time. But basically, a guy that
I was seeing had DMed me and congratulated me, and
I was saying, you know what for And it was
because he found a online profile of me and it
(02:08):
said that I was a law student and I'm not
a law student, and that was the reason why he
was congratulating me. And personally, I took that in a
way because I felt like, you follow me, you see
everything that I'm doing, You saw that I started my channel.
You don't participate in liking or engaging in any of that,
(02:31):
but you're only congratulating me because you think that I'm
doing something that you deem as a real career and
he's an attorney, so I guess what I do isn't
real for him. And I was just thinking to myself,
you know, this guy just I you know, when I
met him, I wasn't in the best of place, and
(02:53):
so coming out of that, I've learned so much. You know,
I don't regret the experience at all, because it taught
me so much about myself what I should and shouldn't accept.
And honestly, all the experiences that I have endured and
gone through in my life better equipped me to help
you ladies and to help you guys avoid the.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Mistakes that I've made.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
And when I look back with all the knowledge that
I have now, I realized so many things that I
did were just wrong. And the signs were clearly there
that he was basically playing games, and I didn't take
heed to them, you know, So that was definitely a
major issue. And he actually did also text me on
(03:38):
Christmas Day, but I didn't even have his number because
I deleted his number, and.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
He basically was insinuating.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
That now that I knew who it was, why didn't
I like give him more of a warmer welcome when
I when he finally told me like, oh, it's me
and I was just like no, because you were playing games.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
And I think that what.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
I did and what a lot of us do, is
justify guys' actions. You know, we let the good times
outweigh the bad, but we have to weigh the reality
that sometimes the bad is more than the good. And
some people are just completely incapable of seeing themselves and
(04:22):
they are, you know, victims.
Speaker 2 (04:26):
Okay, that's what you call a victim.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
You know people in life that are jaded by their
experiences and they go so hard to prevent those things
that they actually manifest just exactly that and they actually
become the person that hurt them. And I cannot let
you ladies do that. That's why I always say, yes,
(04:49):
you're gonna go through things in life, but do not
ever let it jade you because you don't want to
be that person. That is the reason why someone becomes jade.
You want to just give everyone a fair chance, and
it's actually very easy to do.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
It's just like falling in love. You have to love
like you've never been hurt before.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
In life, there are going to be things that tear
you down, that break you their will, but you have
to overcome those things. That's what makes a strong person,
and that's what's going to separate you from those jaded people,
those toxic people who don't deal with their emotions, you know,
who detach themselves and are completely incapable of actually being
(05:33):
happy in life. Right, So I don't even want to
get too much into that. I'm definitely going to make
a story time on that because I know that a
lot of the times we glamorize this lifestyle of dating
wealthy men, valuing yourself, dating guys that actually can provide
for you, invest in you, and you know, being smarter,
(05:58):
leveling up all of these things. But it's not an
easy journey and I and I don't want to skip that,
and I don't want to, you know, portray per se
that it's all one, two three.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Do this, do this, do this, because it's definitely not.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
So I'm definitely gonna make a story time on you know,
and a video. I guess I will combine the two
on the you know, the dark side of you know,
this sort of lifestyle, you know, just and even dating
you know, your regular Joe Schmo. He there's gonna be
(06:34):
cons that come with him too. But that's not even
really where I'm gearing at. So I need to make
a video on that. Okay, ladies.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
So now that I've gotten that little spiel out of
the way.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Let's get into the tips. Let's get into the reason
why you clicked on this video.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Tip number one. Okay.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
And I wrote all these things down, you guys know,
gotta write things down. Mental stability. So this is definitely
a number one thing, ladies. Mental stability is so important
because even in the example that I gave in the
in the beginning of the video, I wasn't mentally at
(07:11):
my best. So you do things, you accept certain things,
you behave a certain way. You are not you. You
are not the best version of yourself, all right. And
I say you are not you for the simple fact
that I consider myself to be, you know, a forever
(07:31):
evolving being a student of life.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Okay, So.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Who you met, you know, who you met two months ago,
whatever the case, that's not who I am today. I'm
always changing for the better, you know, I'm always and
especially because I wasn't in the best of place, you know,
for majority of this year.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
I wasn't.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
I'm not perfect, and that's how I'm able to help
others through my experiences and learning from that and admitting that.
And I am humbled by my experiences and I'm glad
that I have them. It's very easy to regret certain things,
but I learned that the number one thing to avoid
getting played ladies, is your mental stability. Nothing else will
(08:19):
matter if you do not know yourself, Nothing else will matter.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
If you don't value yourself.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
If you don't know your value, somebody else will tell
you your value and it will be lower than it
actually is. You know, men are always testing your value.
Or let me see what I could get away with
her with this, let me try this, Let's.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
See if she'll be down if we do this. That's
just innate to them.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Don't be offended by it at this point, you know,
That's just how men are. They're always testing your value.
It is up to you to make that decision of up.
I'm not going to accept that.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
Up. No, I don't think so, No, try again? Up? Leave?
Speaker 1 (09:02):
Okay, you know, and even to tie it back into
my you know experience, you know, with dating that guy,
I didn't really you know, value myself as much as
I thought I did. There wasn't really much that I
cared about. So I allowed him to do certain things
(09:23):
because I accepted it.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
So I am allowing it. You know, he could never
now he couldn't.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
Okay, And you, just like I always say to you, guys,
you have to leave people where they are because sometimes
you argue people down. You explain, explain, explain, and they
still don't get it, and that is called wasting your time.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
You can say your piece.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
Let whoever think whatever, do better, be better, never bitter.
That's all I have to say about that, okay. Tip
number two, Express your needs and desires. Express your needs
and desires from the beginning, ladies, like for example, you
can mention when you guys are talking. You know, I
(10:13):
really just find it very attractive when a man is
able to provide for a woman. It's just something that
I find very sexy because you want to gauge his
response to see what he's gonna say to that, to
see if he's gonna say, well, of course, I believe
that men.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Should always be providing for the woman.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
Or he'll say something like cool or nice or interesting.
Now you're wasting your time if that's the response to that,
you're wasting your time because you're gauging and you're testing. Okay, hmm,
what does he think about how I intend on actually living?
You know, like, Okay, if you don't set the tone
(10:53):
from the beginning, guys will overlook and disregard ignore anything
that you try to implement further on in the relationship
because he's going to continue to ignore it because it's
benefiting him. Because you didn't set the tone in the
beginning of the relationship, they're going to continue to benefit
off of what you failed to mention and enforce. It's
(11:17):
just that cut and dry. I really need you, ladies,
to date with.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
A purpose, okay, because he sure is all right.
Speaker 1 (11:27):
You know, whatever you tolerate within the first couple of
months sets the tone for the rest of the relationship.
Because if in the first few months, you know, if
your low budget bridget, you know, no offense to anyone
named Bridget, then why should he all of a sudden
(11:48):
get you anything else that you ask for of more value.
If you didn't set that tone, he's going to look
at you. Even though he feels like, oh, she probably
likes and she probably likes that, he's going to feel like, well,
I didn't have to do that when I got you
in the beginning.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
So why should I have to do that? Now? Do
you understand that mentality? That's that's that's how they're thinking.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
And I'm genuinely telling you it will be nearly impossible
to try to implement any sort of change or improvement
if you step into this thing, letting this guy show
you minimal effort in you know, attempt to, you know,
because you want to prove that you are not this way,
(12:28):
and you don't want him to think of you that way.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
And you really like him, so you really don't want
him to leave you.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
Now, whoever's going to leave is going to leave regardless, Okay,
because at the end of the day, who you truly
are will come out.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
You can't hide from who you truly are.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
But for so long, you know, if you are someone
that is high maintenance, I e. Myself, I can't downplay that,
you know, to you know, because I'm afraid that he's
to think I'm a gold digger.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Oh my god, she's gonna just walk away. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
If it's intimidating, it's intimidating, and that means I'm not
for you and you're not for me either.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
Next.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Okay, Tip Number three is have a roster, Ladies, this
is so important.
Speaker 2 (13:20):
Why Because men.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
Have a roster, they are not wiping you up and
cutting off every other connection they have in a few dates.
You are single until you are in a committed relationship period.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Know two ways about it.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
Okay, It's also important to have a roster because you
don't want to get attached to one guy. This is
really important in effort to not getting played. Guys do
this innately, right, So guys, are you know if you're
acting up, they're hitting up Becca, Tricia, Catherine. They're like, oh, whatever,
(14:06):
she doesn't want to meet me tonight. She wants to,
you know, have a little attitude. Okay, Well I have
like ten other girls I can hit up in my
phone in this lineup, I'm not worried about her. That's
why it's so easy for, you know, guys to ignore
your text messages, or leave you on red, lead you
on scene, all of these things, and it hurts your
feelings and you try to, you know, show him loyalty
(14:28):
that he doesn't deserve. And ladies, I'm speaking from experience.
I was that way at some point, you know, And
even though I always I thought I was confident you know,
and I thought that I'm doing the right thing by proving, oh,
I'm only talking to you. Oh I'm showing I'm showing
my unwavering loyalty. The message that I'm sending across to
(14:49):
him is good. Got her on lockdown, and I know
I could definitely do whatever I want because I'm doing
it now and she's still here and she doesn't even
really know, and I don't even think she really did.
She probably wouldn't really ca I could probably get myself
out of this because I know she really likes me,
and I know that she's only with me. They love
hearing that it feeds their ego. Yes, we want to
feed their egos. Men love for their egos to be stroked.
(15:11):
But we're not doing it in that way. Okay, you're
not giving them that satisfaction. Also, genuinely, we're not doing that.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Okay. All right.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
So having multiple candidates in your roster is very important.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
The key to that do not be physically intimate with
any of them.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
That is the key.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
You know so many times with data, and it's very
easy to do, especially when you're not dating just one person,
you're dating multiple people. You cannot you should not be
doing this with any of them. You know, if you
are someone that is having, you know, sex before marriage,
(15:56):
if that's the route that you're taking, you know, I
don't don't normally like to advise people really on when
to be intimate with people, but if I had to,
because I know that people love answers and they want
to know, it's certainly not before four months of consistency courting. Okay,
gifts favors being there for you genuinely, if in your
(16:23):
roster you have a guy that has significantly made it
to the top, okay, because he's done all these things,
he has passed all these tests, he has been consistent,
made effort to see you, okay, invested in you. If
that's the route you want to go, then you can
(16:43):
start considering that right. And for my ladies that you
know are Christian and they are saving themselves till marriage,
I would actually specifically try my best to date men
that have the same belae leaves because then you won't
feel the pressure of.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Worrying about how do I tell him.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
That I don't that i'm you know that I want
to wait till marriage, I'm a virgin, all these things.
It's best to date someone that has similar values as
you do, right, because in the end, you can like
this person all you want, but if he feels strongly
you know about well, I don't really believe in that.
(17:29):
I don't really think that that matters. And it doesn't
really matter because we really like each other and we
really have a connection. So why should we wait. We
already know that we like each other and we've already
spent you know, five months together.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
Don't do it.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
If this is your decision, that is your decision, babe.
And for whoever is looking for a sign because somebody
needs to see this, do not do it. It is
your choice and you made the decision to stick by
your faith.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
You made the decision. You made that vow to God,
do not break that.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
There is going to be someone that will respect that.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
That's it. I had to get that out there. I'll
tell you that much. Okay. But for my ladies that
already are you know, doing this.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
You can still value yourself by not you know, busting
it open globally.
Speaker 2 (18:23):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
The main reason ladies, that we as women feel so
you know, used and just cheated is.
Speaker 2 (18:33):
Because there's no reciprocity.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
We feel like we gave more than we received. Right,
That's why sometimes you feel heartbroken. Oh I tried to
show him that I was a loyal person. Been there,
done that. It doesn't work. It doesn't work like that.
If you were courted, treated, correctly, invested in gifts, trips,
(18:57):
all these things to compensate for your time, you wouldn't
necessarily feel cheated, right, does that make sense?
Speaker 2 (19:08):
You only feel that.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Way when when you look back and you realize, oh
my gosh, you know I could have gotten more. There
was barely any effort given. I was the one that
was always proving myself, proving my worth. I don't think so, right,
And if that's what you have been doing, it ends today.
Speaker 2 (19:32):
It's done today. Tip number four is very important.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
I mean to be honest, All of these tips are
equally very very important. You know, period emotional insurance. Okay, ladies,
emotional insurance.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
I'm gonna call it. You know. Quality Queen's right, I
E myself, I.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
E E you your equality, queen. Quality Queens require emotional insurance.
Speaker 2 (20:07):
Period. Don't ever in your life give your prize or
begin to give your prize to any man who doesn't
pass any of these tests of investing, like I.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
Said, courting you, taking you on dates, you know, favors
for you, showing up you know, if you need him.
If you're tire, you know, if you have a flat tire?
Is he there for you? Is he making time you
know to speak to you. Is he calling you on
the phone and not trying to be a texting buddy
because a lot of these times it's very easy to be,
(20:44):
you know, you know, a cheating chase. Okay, if you
are just texting girls, you're going down your list.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
All you do is really text them all day.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
When you have a phone call with him, he's investing time. Now,
how often is he calling you? And also pay attention
to things like this because sometimes they start off wanting
to talk to you on the phone, and then you
will gradually see that the relationship becomes solely texting now
(21:16):
and barely any phone calls.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
That matters.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
Phone calls matter, right, You do not want a texting
relationship and a texting buddy.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
I am not your pen pal.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
And plus you want to ensure that he's setting aside
time to actually be on the phone with you and
be engaged talking to you. We are not penpals. You
need to know with this emotional insurance, all these months
of dating him, investing in you, him courting you, treating
you respectfully, him being consistent in his efforts with you,
(21:51):
calling you on a consistent basis, communicating with.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
You very well.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
That will kind of show you, you know, whether or
not he's capable of commitment.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
It will.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
You know, and worst case scenario, if it doesn't, you
gain the experience, right, and you were treated exceptionally well,
and for whatever reason it.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Doesn't work out, you move on to the next person. Right.
Speaker 1 (22:19):
I promise you if some of you could take back
the physical investment you know from those guys that you
no longer deal with, you wouldn't even feel as.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
Cheated, you know, by them.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
So they're lacking reciprocity, and you invested physically in them,
sharing moments that you thought were special, and to them
it was like whatever.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
They don't care if it is or if it isn't,
if it comes where it goes.
Speaker 1 (22:49):
You wouldn't even really be that sad over that guy,
because a lot of the times it's not that we're
specifically sad over the guy.
Speaker 2 (22:56):
I want you, ladies to think about this.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
You are set because of the physical investment, that's number one.
A lot of ladies do this right. It's kind of
like I think Cardi B mentioned it one time where she.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
Said, when you.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Are intimate with somebody and let's say that ended, instead
of going and being intimate with somebody else, you go
back to someone else so that you don't add another
guy to your you know, I don't know your arsenal whatever.
My point is, if you didn't invest physically in this person,
(23:32):
and you know, matter of factly because you think very clearly,
it's very easy to ignore signs from someone when you've
already invested in them physically.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
But think about it, Ladies.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
When you are dating, you know a guy, and let's
say two weeks have gone by and he kind of
sets something that pissed you off, and you're just thinking, okay, well,
I don't even really care or I.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
Don't even really to accept this, like what's up with that?
Speaker 1 (24:02):
You know by done with him. But then let's say
another guy. You were already intimate with. That guy within
the first two weeks he says something to piss you off,
and it's kind of like you don't even understand why
you feel like you want to give this person another chance.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
You don't even understand that.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
You're just thinking like, oh, oh my god, but I
really do like him, but really subconsciously because us as women,
we put a lot of value, as we should, into
our you know, intimate experiences with guys. Guys don't normally
(24:37):
do that initially like we do. And lastly, tip number
five this is huge. Ladies do not ever confuse commitment
with companionship.
Speaker 2 (24:56):
This is so huge.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
Men primarily date woman for sex, at least initially.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
We all know this. This is not up for discussion.
I don't want negotiate with you. It is what it is.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
It's a matter of a fact, and us as women,
we date for companionship. So when you put these two together, boom,
all of a sudden, you have friends with benefits. You know,
he's benefiting from you because he's getting what he wants
and you feel like he's, you know, your companion, and
you're spending a lot of time with him. So now
you just have a situation that you didn't really intend
(25:31):
on getting into.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
I don't think so.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
When you combine hanging out with someone daily, doing everyday things,
getting closer with this person, you know, getting familiar with
this person, and then you add sex to that.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
You're going to assume that you're.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
In some sort of relationship or commitment with that person.
And can we please stop justifying this with men? Ladies,
get specific answers out of these men.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Please, what are we doing? What are we this is?
Speaker 1 (26:15):
Why do not allow him to pressure you or force
you into, you know, being intimate with him, because he's
so quick to do that, but he doesn't want a
commitment with that. Sorry, that comes with commitment, Like what
do you expect?
Speaker 2 (26:31):
You do this?
Speaker 1 (26:32):
I do what you say and then basically I send
the message across of well I already did it, and
you know, I guess like maybe he'll like me more,
maybe he won't see someone else now because he likes
me more. No, now you are a part of the list.
You're a part of the list, and yeah, he'll see
you for a couple more weeks. He might see you
(26:54):
for another month, but he's still seeing those other people.
You didn't really set a ground rule of you're not
doing anything until I know that I know that, I
know that I'm going to get a commitment. You know,
I kind of made a jingle that I want you
ladies to think about you know, it's.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Like, no, no, no, you won't. You will not play me.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
If you don't, I promise you just wait out and see.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
You know, do not let these men play you ever. Ever.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
I'm teaching you ladies the game because I know what
it feels like to be hurt and it sucks. I
know what it feels like when you did all these
things and you basically gave him, you know, wife privileges,
and you know, out of the genuineness of your heart,
you were trying to show him that you are a
good person. And some men tend to manipulate you into
(27:54):
proving your worth because you know that they're very jaded
and they have, you know, a low opinion of women,
so maybe in their head they justify it by this
is why I don't commit to one person, because when
I did XX and next happen to me.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
Shut up, get over yourself. You were grown, Okay.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
We don't have time for people who do not deal
with their toxicity, with their emotions.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
And with their issues. Leave that.
Speaker 1 (28:21):
In twenty eighteen, twenty nineteen, it is no longer allowed.
It should be illegal for people to not deal and
men specifically to not deal with their emotions. And justify
it by treating women any type of way. It's you know,
to make an excuse of why they are afraid to
(28:44):
commit to you.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
That's just a lie.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
That's a justification to hold you on a rope without
getting anything definite. Be very careful of guys that you
cannot get anything definite out of them. You can't get
a yes, you can't get to know. It's always an
in between. It's always a ah, maybe, oh I think so, no,
(29:08):
yes or no.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
That's it, period. I don't care.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
There are no two ways about this, and this is
very important, crucial information ladies.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Definite answers matter. Okay, so back to what I was saying.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
If your off topic a little bit, When you combine
you know, your want for companionship with his want for
you know, just sex, next thing you know you signed
up for, you know, you signed a contract whether you
knew it or not for Hi, I'll be friends of
benefits with you. And in his head he's thinking, all right, well,
good now I don't have to deal with committing to
(29:47):
her anymore because I already know that she's signed up
for this. Men like to play on your naiveness sometimes
a lot of the time and what they know already
that you know you may be looking for.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
They will play on.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
That ignorance and act as if they had no idea
because you simply didn't mention it. And so in their
head they're thinking, well, you never mentioned that you wanted
to be in a.
Speaker 2 (30:14):
Relationship, you know.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Initially when we started this, which honestly you shouldn't even either,
because you don't want to scare them away. But the
point is you shouldn't be giving them these wifey privileges
and you know, sleeping with them, and they've done next
to nothing for that, and then you want to have
demands on them after In their head, like I mentioned
(30:39):
in previous points, why should they do more for you
now when they didn't have to do that in the beginning.
You know, when they realize early on how little effort
that they have to put in, Oh god, it's a
green light. They're going to you know, you know, you
give them an end, so they're going to take, you know,
one hundred miles.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
Do you understand that.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
I need you guys to understand that, babe, it's not
a relationship. I get a lot of dms, and you know,
I want you all to know and you know, genuinely,
no question that you guys have is a stupid question.
I you know, sometimes no matter how obvious things may seem,
it helps to hear an outside perspective, and it helps
(31:24):
to hear someone state the obvious, sometimes out.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Loud to you.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
I get a lot of dms of girls you know saying,
you know, Asha, what do I do?
Speaker 2 (31:34):
You know?
Speaker 1 (31:35):
I was with this guy, I slept with him, and
now he just wants to be friends?
Speaker 2 (31:39):
What do I do? Move on?
Speaker 1 (31:42):
Because he's not going to change what he wants with you.
He already got something from you. Why should he go
back to trying to get a commitment to get something
that he already had.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
Does that make sense?
Speaker 1 (31:55):
And it's really just honestly quite amazing how men function,
because they will beg and beg and beg and be
the best person, the best person, you know.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
I hear all these stories of.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Guys being, you know, the Knight and shining armor, and
right when you know, you give it up and I
give it up too soon? Specifically, they change, you know.
I'm gonna read something for you, guys that I saw
on Instagram that's very important. You ladies need to check
out this Instagram. I mean, wow, this instagram teaches everything that.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
I promote mainly on this channel.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
I absolutely love this instagram and I will of course
be linking this down below because I can't. I don't
want to take credit for you know, something that someone
else said, but it says the biggest difference.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
I'm gonna read it off my iPad.
Speaker 1 (32:51):
The biggest difference between woman and a man is that
he experiences sex as a legitimate physical need, just as
your body tells.
Speaker 2 (32:59):
You when you're hungry or thirsty.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
His sexual desires are determined by biological factors like the
presence of testosterone in his body. The physical need for
sexual release intensifies as you know, like I guess the
sperm builds in the testicles. I say that scientifically, so
(33:22):
hopefully this thing doesn't get flagged after you know, he
reaches that you know peak, He's satisfied momentarily, right, but
then the clock ticks on and it's and then he
starts all over again. It's a never ending cycle. As women,
(33:42):
we do not experience the physiological drive for sex in
the same way as men. There is no build up
that demands release. Women's sexual desires are connected to our
emotions and hormonal factors like ministruation, ovulation, pregnancy, metopause, etc.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
It is not a physical need for us. A man
can experience sexual arousal apart from any.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
Emotional attachment. He can look at a naked woman and
feel the intense physical desire for her, while at the
same time he may be completely devoted to and in
love with his wife. Men can separate sex from a relationship,
while for a woman the two are usually intertwined.
Speaker 2 (34:39):
I know you ladies can relate to this.
Speaker 1 (34:42):
That is because a woman's desire for sex is still
linked to an emotional or relational need, while a man's
desire for sex is primarily connected to a physiological and
biological need. This is why men and women operate the
way that they do. I really hope that makes sense it,
(35:04):
you know, it just really gives so much clarity, you know.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
And then in.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
Another post, you Know it goes on to say that
immediately after you know, a man reaches that peak, he
goes into a stage called refractory period, which causes him
to lose complete arousal and simulation, and a chemical called prolactin,
which suppresses dopamine. Dopamine is a feel good hormone for
(35:30):
those of you that don't know, is then released into
the brain, causing men.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
To lose complete interest in the woman.
Speaker 1 (35:37):
This is why it's so easy for men to you know,
bang you one night and literally.
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Not speak to you the day after. Right, It's like
to bring it to draw it home.
Speaker 1 (35:50):
It's like, Ah, I'm so hungry you eat the next day,
You're not thinking about yesterday. I was so hungry and
I had you know, that fruit. You're not thinking about that.
You're moving on.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
Okay, I'm hungry again. What am I gonna eat today?
You understand? Does that make sense? Ah? God? That hit?
Speaker 1 (36:07):
So men tend to pull away and become distant. So
this is why if the man isn't emotionally invested in you,
and women neglect to establish an emotional bond, emotional insurance
and connection before physical intimacy. This is why men ghost
(36:31):
women after sex.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
This is why. This is simply why God, oh my goodness.
You know.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
And as for us women, we release you know, a
bonding love hormone called oxidosin, which causes you to bond
and get attached to your partner.
Speaker 2 (36:49):
Why, which is why it says.
Speaker 1 (36:50):
Here women want to you know, cuddle, you know, after
you know intimacy, you know, and like I said, men
release that hormone prolactin which stimilates a feeling of disinterest
and detachment.
Speaker 2 (37:05):
Right.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
And it also goes on to say, I mean this
page literally you would think I created it myself or
I contributed to some of these posts.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
You know.
Speaker 1 (37:16):
Of course, there isn't anything in life that we will
all one hundred percent agree with, but for the majority,
this page is just on point.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
And again it will be in the description box below.
Speaker 1 (37:26):
I had to read you know, that excerpt for you guys,
because that.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
Really explains and articulates.
Speaker 1 (37:35):
Exactly how and why men act the way that they do.
And this is why time invested matters.
Speaker 2 (37:47):
Men do not. They avoid it all.
Speaker 1 (37:50):
Costs, investing time, right, investing, investing in things so they
know that when they do, they don't want to just
give that up because they've invested too much. That's why
you will have guys who will entertain a new relationship,
but they're still back and forth between their ex girlfriend
(38:13):
or their you know, baby mother, or maybe their ex
wife or maybe a girl that they you know, had
relations with off and on for multiple years. It's because
they've invested so much in that person they can't just
let it go.
Speaker 2 (38:33):
It's not possible.
Speaker 1 (38:34):
When men invest so much, it's not easy for them
to let go, because, for one, it's not easy for
men to invest in the first place.
Speaker 2 (38:42):
Right, Okay, And you know, also, I was reading.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
Something I think it's also from that instagram where they
compared you.
Speaker 2 (38:52):
Know, the situation.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
Again, we're talking about point number five of do not
confuse companionship with commitment. They were comparing the situation to
a homeowner and a renter. So a homeowner, of course,
has more responsibilities and a commitment than a renter who
(39:16):
can call a place his own temporarily without the baggage
of an actual commitment or investment.
Speaker 2 (39:25):
WHOA wow, did you hear that? Rewind and play that again.
Do not be rented. Do not be rented.
Speaker 1 (39:38):
You are not something that's a temporary investment. That is
not who you are. This isn't a showroom. We are
not picking up pieces of whatever we like and putting
it back when we're done. We are without actually investing.
We are not doing that.
Speaker 2 (39:56):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (39:57):
And an effort to avoid this type of you know situation,
this is why you need to set guidelines and expiration dates. Okay,
he doesn't do this by X amount of time, I'm out.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
You know.
Speaker 1 (40:09):
If he, you know, doesn't meet this standard, I'm done.
And there are no two ways about it. It's just
as simple as let's say a man's goal was simply
to not be in a relationship with you. Some guys
will tell you right off the bat, and congrats to
those men because they give you the option and the choice.
Some men will dance around, you know, in every little
(40:31):
nook and cranny that they can, to confuse you and
make you always feel like it's a time issue what
you want, and in time he'll get there, and in
time he will commit, and enough he doesn't want it.
That's why you have men out there who will waste
their time, you know, you know, treating the woman that
(40:52):
he was with for multiple years any sort of way
and never even really commit to her, and then he'll
meet someone in six months and marry her. So for men,
they don't really run on time, which is why they
have no problem trying to sleep with you within an
hour of meeting you, within a day of meeting you.
(41:15):
It's a physiological and biological need for them. Which is
why they can detach and disconnect effortlessly right after they
get what they want. So I really really hope.
Speaker 2 (41:29):
That you ladies have enjoyed this video, this topic.
Speaker 1 (41:33):
You know, when I was writing the treatment for it,
I really put my heart and soul into this because
this really resonated with me.
Speaker 2 (41:42):
This topic.
Speaker 1 (41:43):
I strongly urge you guys to in any time you're
feeling doubts and you don't know watch my videos. I
genuinely want to help as many people as I can
because I've been there.
Speaker 2 (42:00):
You are not alone. I've been there.
Speaker 1 (42:02):
I know what it feels like when you feel played
and you don't know who to talk to about it,
and you know or you accept certain things.
Speaker 2 (42:13):
Number one, Ladies, like I mentioned in this video.
Speaker 1 (42:16):
You have to be mentally stable or nothing else matters.
The rest of the tips that I gave after tip
number one do not matter if you do not have
mental stability, because you will accept things you shouldn't accept.
You will do things you wouldn't normally do, and you
(42:38):
will behave as though you normally wouldn't behave if you
were in a better mindset. And this sucks to hear
because some people think, oh, I can grow with this person,
and I want this person to show me XX and X.
At the end of the day, we have to accept
our truth and sometimes even in these sort of situations
(42:59):
that we find ourselves in, like myself right where I
learned so much because I realized I wasn't where I
am now, and I learned so much and I've matured
so much. And because of that, I don't need to prove,
you know, to this person and that person that I'm
(43:19):
worthy of being with or let me show you that I'm.
Speaker 2 (43:22):
Loyal to you.
Speaker 1 (43:23):
Why am I showing you that I'm loyal to you?
Are you showing that to me? Why am I trying
to show you that I'm committed to you when you're
doing your own thing and men love making you feel
as though you're the only one.
Speaker 2 (43:39):
They're good at that. Right.
Speaker 1 (43:43):
Even Futures said it in his song I know how
to make the girls go crazy when you treat them
like your number one baby or lady.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
One of those.
Speaker 1 (43:54):
Yes, men have mastered that skill, and they always want
to know they I don't like cutting things off because
they always want to know they can come back.
Speaker 2 (44:02):
I use this term very loosely.
Speaker 1 (44:04):
This is just an example, because there are great men
out there, ladies.
Speaker 2 (44:07):
Men are not all you know, dogs or bad.
Speaker 1 (44:11):
There are great men out there, right, we just have
to learn the game and get the ones that we
want to do what we want, period.
Speaker 2 (44:25):
Okay, men, let's just say men.
Speaker 1 (44:27):
Are like, uh, like dogs, right. They bury their bones girls,
in this specific example, they bury their bones and then
they like to come back whenever they feel like it
and dig them up again.
Speaker 2 (44:42):
Ready to play with you now, ready to eat this? Now?
Speaker 1 (44:46):
I don't think so. You were not a bone to
be picked. You were not a doll on a shelf.
You were not you know, an article of clothing in
a showroom. You are a quality queen. Don't ever forget it.
Don't ever forget it. Okay, And again, of course, I'm
(45:07):
so humbled by the rapid growth of this channel and
all the support that you ladies have shown me.
Speaker 2 (45:15):
You know, it is just so surreal.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
And I say it every video because I feel like
I'm living in a dream and it just means so
much to me. You know, you guys, I'm growing along
with you, guys. I'm not perfect, and I'm on this
journey too. I'm on this level of journey still it
never ends, you know, but I want to hold you
(45:42):
guys hand. I want to be there for you guys,
right And I do get a lot of dms, which
you know is amazing.
Speaker 2 (45:50):
So I'm thinking that.
Speaker 1 (45:53):
Maybe some days I'll go live and you guys can
ask me some questions live, and when I do that,
I will post it on my YouTube wall so that
you guys can. You guys are notified of when I
decide to go live or whatever it is that I'm
about to do. So, guys, that is the end of
this video. Thank you so much for watching. If you
(46:15):
guys have made it to the end of this video,
I want you guys to comment down below with a
lipstick emoji. Comment down below the lipstick emoji. That way
I know that you watch the video in its entirety,
and I genuinely hope that you do, because I also
get a lot of ladies who DM me and they
(46:38):
ask me questions that I have literally answered in my
uh in my videos, or I will get comments to
questions that I've answered in that specific video. You know,
I'm not upset about it, but all I ask is
that you guys actually watched the videos in its entirety.
Or that you read the description box in its entirety
(46:59):
as well, because I do put a lot of effort
into my description box, writing these video treatments out for
you guys, because I want you guys to have the
best information as possible.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
So I just had to put that this thing right
in there. Okay. So, like I said, that is the
Ends video. I'm so coughing why okay, guys.
Speaker 1 (47:22):
So I love you and God loves you, and I'll
see you guys in my next video.
Speaker 2 (47:26):
I love you Angel so much. Wo
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
NFL Daily with Gregg Rosenthal
Gregg Rosenthal and a rotating crew of elite NFL Media co-hosts, including Patrick Claybon, Colleen Wolfe, Steve Wyche, Nick Shook and Jourdan Rodrigue of The Athletic get you caught up daily on all the NFL news and analysis you need to be smarter and funnier than your friends.