December 5, 2025 • 23 mins
The power of being high maintenance… In this dating, love, and relationship advice video, I will discuss the power of being high maintenance, which you should not overlook. People sometimes use the term high maintenance negatively but it still has benefits that can lead to personal growth and success. Watch the full video to harness the power of being high maintenance and positively influence your life in ways you never thought possible. High maintenance can help you achieve your goals and reach your full potential. Although high maintenance can help you build stronger relationships, it's important to respect others' needs and be willing to compromise when necessary. Embrace this relationship advice to learn more about the power of being high maintenance. Being high maintenance can give you the confidence to demand the respect and treatment you deserve, leading to healthier and more fulfilling relationships. One of the advantages of being high maintenance is it will help you recognize and address toxic behaviors in yourself and others, leading to healthier and more fulfilling relationships. By embracing this concept, you can take control of your life and attract the people and opportunities that align with your values and aspirations. I'm Just a girl who's trying to build a longer table instead of a fence. My goal is to help you transform your life with my combination of personal development, human psychology, sophistication, and inner and outer beauty tips. This video will give you clarity if you are asking the following questions or looking for;
- The power of being hig maintenance
- High maintenance
- High maintenance woman
- Advice for women
- Online dating
- Being high maintenance
- Relationship advice for women
- Dating
- Maintenance
- Dating tips
- Level up
- Relationship advice for women
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello angels, Welcome back to my channel. Today's video is
going to be a little chit chat video. I want
to talk to you guys. As you guys see from
the title of this video, this is about the power
of being high maintenance. Being high maintenance period stereotypically gets
a bad rep. We're gonna uncover all of that, but
(00:22):
you guys know the drill by now, if you've been
keeping up with my daily uploads, you would know to
follow me on Instagram. That will be right here, of course.
And also, do not forget to subscribe to this channel
if you have not already, turn on your post notifications
so that you're notified every single time that I post,
(00:42):
because I am posting every day for the rest of
the month. Also, if you have a question that you
would like to speak with me privately about or bent
to me anything of that nature, in my description box,
I have all my instinct go information, which which is
now available on both iPhones and androids without further ado,
(01:06):
let's get into this video. Okay, So we're gonna talk
today about the power of being high maintenance. Now, this
topic I discovered on one of my favorite author's websites.
Far from Basic by g. L. Lambert. He is absolutely
incredible and I love all of his content and I
found an article on this I wrote this video treatment
(01:30):
a while ago, so I don't remember what the name
of the article specifically was, but he has an incredible
website with incredible resources, and I will definitely provide the
link to his website in my description box below. So basically,
(01:50):
I just wanted to go over some of the key
points that I saw in his article inform you ladies,
as well as give my own insight as to what
I think about the power of being. I mean, it's
so rule of thumb, of course, is to only date providers.
I mean, I've said this since the beginning of time
on my channel. You should not ever enter into a
(02:13):
relationship without knowing that a man can provide for you.
And one of my favorite quotes in life in general
is the answer is never no, you're just asking the
wrong person. So in regards to relationships, what one person
won't do, another one will of that and more abundantly,
(02:36):
So keep that in mind. One of the things that
I love that G. L. Lambert said in his article
was that it's important to note that there's a difference
between a hard working man that's on the come up
versus like a bum that's looking for a come up.
And he said, do not confuse the hardworking man saving
(02:58):
for their business with the one that just has the
business idea. Wow. That really resonated with me. A lot
of the times we find ourselves in these situations, ladies,
right where, Oh, I'm just gonna stay with him, you know,
and build with him because I know that he has
(03:20):
all these inspirations. I remember one of my ex boyfriends
that I was dating when I was twenty one. He
had all these ideas and never executed any of them.
I mean, it was beyond pathetic to me. I guess
because I've always been fairly wise for my age. I
(03:40):
saw straight through whatever he was trying to pull over
my eyes. And I remember thinking to myself when he
was explaining to me, you know, this business idea that
he had, that he wasn't going to actually execute any
of this. He was just doing this or saying this
to me because it sounded great. But he couldn't even
(04:03):
sustain a job, you know. He was very heady, hot headed.
I just it was a disaster at the end of
the day. There's a general rule there are doers and
there are people that are talkers, and in general, men
should be doers more than talkers in general. So you
(04:25):
have a guy that's literally just a talker, yikes, you
have a problem, and it's not in Houston. Be smart,
pay attention, Know the difference between one that has an
idea and one that's actually building and taking action towards
(04:46):
his business endeavors. Being high maintenance gets such a bad
rep but I feel personally that whomever created that sort
of stereotype of being high maintenance as a negative thing
was clearly someone that was subpar. Because if you're not
(05:09):
in any way threatened by what I'm expecting, or maybe
even what I come with or what I even have
to offer, then why does it matter if I'm high maintenance?
Wouldn't you want to be with someone that has standards?
I would think. So there are men that are willing
(05:31):
to spend money on you to court you all of
these things without you having to be intimate with them.
This is very important because a lot of girls message
me from all different walks of life saying, oh my gosh,
this guy wants to sleep with me, and I feel
like he did take me to this nice place. You know.
(05:52):
You know, we've been dating for a month, so I
just feel like he's been consistent for that month, so
I feel like I should at least, you know, have
sex with him. Whatever the case is, No, you don't
have to. I would stretch that thing for as long
as possible, because it's easy for someone, especially a man
who's very determined, to be consistent when he really really
(06:17):
wants something. And the second you give it up, because
a month is very soon, everything is different. And the
first thing they tell you is nothing will change. Everything
will be the same. It won't be different. No, actually
it will be the exact opposite of what you just
tried to pull over my eyes. Hello. At the end
(06:38):
of the day, we all want a good looking man
who can buy us nice things. That is natural for
a woman. So what's important that I love? Oh my gosh,
this article is just so incredible. He said, Ladies, you
need to stop under selling yourself so that you don't
come across as a goal digger, because that's like everyone's
(07:00):
biggest fear, and guys love to throw that word around. Oh,
she's a gold digger, she's this, she's that. Baby. If
you had it, you wouldn't feel like that if you
had it, honey, Like, what do you expect to do?
You know when you're dating someone, because you don't want
to come across this high maintenance and you don't want
to seem like a gold digger. So you're gonna just
(07:22):
you know, Netflix and chill and waste your gas going
to his house delivering him yourself on a silver platter.
Are you well? I have to check in. I need
to ask quality queen control. Are you well? You don't
(07:43):
even realize half the stuff that we do? Ouh bring
to this guy's house. He lives thirty minutes away from you,
never once even bother to pay for your uber and
here you go. I'll be you right there, uh skirt, No,
I know that. For me, I require someone that's going
to be a gentleman. I've experienced dating guys that were
(08:05):
very chivalrous, and having those experiences, you just can't go
back where they effortlessly and naturally do things for you
because that's the way it's supposed to go. But you're
essentially doing because you're settling. You know, if you still
are doing the Netflix and chill thing, I cannot say
it enough. Maybe you need to stop today, all right,
(08:30):
looking for a sign? This was your sign? Stop selling
for that. Okay, you're paying him with your time to
give you a low budget time, and why would he
have any incentive to go above and beyond when he
never had to. You can't step in trying to be
low budget, low maintenance so that you can get the guy.
(08:54):
And then once you get the guy, then you want
to be yourself. Oh well, I want this, I want that.
He's gonna think, why do I need to give you that?
I never had to do that before, so why would
I start doing that now? All right? Now, we as
women need security financially, emotionally, we need that. Men need
their egos stroked. They need to feel respected and like
(09:17):
the hero. So let's be clear when I say this,
wanting to be courted and you know, expecting guys to
pay for dates that asks you out does not mean
that you are not independent. This is just a this
is a natural thing, you know, like the egg doesn't
(09:39):
chase the sperm. It's a natural thing. Be careful of
trying to come across as not needing this, not needing that,
because then that's an easy way to get taken advantage
of it's like, oh hmm, wow, that was easy. Well,
since she wants to be misindependent, he's going to do
(09:59):
one or two. He's going to not speak to you again,
or he's gonna play along if he's extra dusty and say, wow, okay,
I don't even have to pay for her to do
these dates. I mean, she is the one that even
wants to pay for the date that we went on.
And alpha males, you know, the ones that we want
(10:20):
to attract ideally, are not going to be attracted to
someone that has that sort of masculine energy of I
don't need a man to do this and that. Yes, ladies,
I understand, No, we do not need men. But you
can still be feminine and feel that way. And at
the end of the day, you can't lead that with
(10:41):
that mentality and expect to really go far. It pushes
men away, especially alpha males. What you will attract, in
essence are actually beta males that you what boss around
all the time and you go you pay all the
bills and house and you know, become the man of
(11:02):
the house and before you get carried away. Understand, if
that's the lifestyle you choose, I'm not upset, just don't
be upset at my lifestyle choices. I you know, I
don't get it. No, but the thing is like, I
don't get it. I know. This is a very controversial
(11:23):
topic of whether or not we as women should call
men out on certain things that they do, and from
a male perspective, I've heard this on multiple occasions. They
say that they actually like when women call them out
on their stuff because they feel like, wow, she's not
(11:43):
taking any nonsense. The way I view it is kind
of like this. If a guy basically approaches you and says, hey,
like we should totally go out some time for you know,
get drinks really quickly or coffee, you can say, oh,
thanks for offering. I do prefer to go to dinner
(12:05):
something a little bit more formal when getting to know somebody.
For instance, here's a real life situation. I was talking
to this guy before and he basically asked me out
on a date, and he told me, I will get
back to you on the time, but let's shoot for
(12:26):
seven thirty and I will update you throughout the day
if I can make it or not. So you know
what I did, I said, Okay, Typically I wouldn't do
something like that because I'm thinking to myself, I like dates.
Of course, we like dates that are set in stone,
because otherwise, to me, what I feel like you're doing
(12:48):
is you're basically telling me stay ready just in case
I end up being able to come or not, like
you can't be well. So whatever. The whole day goes by,
and it's six o'clock and he messages me saying hey
(13:09):
and hey, sorry, you know work, what's crazy? Whatever the
case is, And all I'm thinking is, so you couldn't
tell me at five, you couldn't tell me at four.
It's looking like things are not gonna end anytime soon.
Can we reschedule instead? You text me at six for
(13:33):
a date that's supposed to happen at seven point thirty,
telling me it looks like things you're getting are hectic.
Rough day at work. Honey, you knew that it's not
your first day on the job. You're part owner of
the place. You know how this runs, so please save it.
(13:55):
So you know what I said, Well, since I haven't
heard from you around five five thirty, I just figured
that it isn't happening at all, And if you want
to schedule a date with me, we can reschedule for
next week. Didn't even give him a date or anything
like that, because to me, I don't even like talking
to you at this point because this doesn't make sense
to me. And I'm not going to set the tone
of I'm waiting on you right now. No no, no, no, no,
(14:18):
you wanted me right Oh? Okay, cool, He's gonna say, oh, well,
is this time too late? Because I am already in
this area. I guess I'll just turn around and go,
you know, back to the city. And I'm thinking safe
travels on your way there, Like, what do you want
(14:43):
to know? I'm not no, so me setting that standard
and kind of calling him out on the fact that
he didn't text me till six o'clock okay, and the
last time we spoke at that time was around eleven
twelve pm. And you're going to message someone that you live,
(15:07):
you know, kind of a distance away from an hour
and a half before. Do you not understand how women work?
We have to do our hair and do our makeup,
all of those things. What did you expect that I
literally come like ready to you like a robot? Please stop? So?
(15:31):
According to g. L Lambert, he says that being picky
doesn't make you a nag. It makes you smart. Of course,
the delivery matters as well, But I actually do agree
with that, especially when you're trying to set the tone,
because I always tell you, guys, as long as you
let them do whatever they want, they're going to continue
(15:51):
doing whatever they want. And then by time you try
to change things because you just sick and tired and
sick and tired, they're not going to do it because
they know ever had to do it before. By that
time comes, it's like I might as well get a
whole new girl now, because what am I gonna, you know,
do new things for the old girl that I'm already
with when she already accepted my low effort behavior. I
(16:14):
think that's fair to think. So understand this being high
maintenance calling someone out setting the tone for something. Delivery
is everything. Delivery is everything. Remember what I just said,
will highlight one or two things their lack to meet
your standards or their ability to meet your standards. That's it.
(16:37):
So you need to ask yourself who benefits from being
a doormat to men? And I've seen this time and
time again. Do not build with any guy because he
will leave you. He will build with you and then
take what he built and move on to the next
chick and provide her with the entire life that you
spent building with him. Acrimony style. Being all maintenance doesn't
(17:02):
get the guy. I don't care how much you think
you're winning by yes, sing him to death and accepting
his behavior. I know how he is. I love him.
He does love me. He does love me. There's a difference.
There's levels to love. There's levels to love, especially with
men master compartmentalizers. Men rarely choose the girl that is
(17:23):
easy and convenient because you know what they're gonna do.
They're going to use us us until the next option
comes along. That's what they're gonna do. For instance, one
time I knew this guy. He was dating this girl
for a while off and on, but they weren't ever official,
And aside from the fact that she's you know, convenient
(17:44):
and very low maintenance, he would still go out and
look for other girls to date. But this girl that
was involved with him, she genuinely loves him, and at
the end of the day, it does feel good to
be loved, it really does. But as a man, they're
(18:06):
not going to stick around with you because of the
love you have for them. They're going to appreciate that,
if they even do from a distance. And go give
the love that you crave right on to the next chick.
And here's what I love, he said. Men will bend
backwards for women that are brave enough to simply ask
(18:29):
for more. We have so many excuses in our mouth.
I don't want to ask him, but he wants to
have sex with you. But like I don't know if
he but he already had sex with you. But I
just feel you're giving something. He wants something if you
didn't give it already. But you can't ask for anything
(18:52):
it's too much. So then what do you think your
value is? If you asking for any thing else is
too much? Oh, think about that. And like Gia Lambert said,
and you act like you don't need anything but his love,
he will exploit that and not appreciate it, but rather
(19:15):
take advantage and do the bare minimum. Wow, that is profound.
Don't be that girl. That's just Oh love is enough, honey.
Love does not pay the bills. People get divorced and
they still love each other, but they have financial issues
amongst other things, probably, but finances matter. Many people get
(19:39):
divorced over financial issues and their love cannot stretch to
pay that rent, to buy that child diapers? Who can
you pay with love? So I say all that to
say this twenty five and older my age, your aim
is and should be different. A list of your five
(20:01):
non negotiables and make them real tangible things. What are
your non negotiables for a husband? What are your no
negotiables for a boyfriend? You know he must have a car,
must make time for you. Obviously, ever is on your lists.
Just stick to it and do not compromise. Like I
discussed in previous videos earlier in this week, do not
start out in a relationship compromising all these key points
(20:26):
that I'm mentioning in this video. Ladies really do matter.
It's going to pay off to be high maintenance. If
you are high maintenance, you are hig maintenance. I'm high maintenance.
Ah sue me like men will raise to the standard
if they want you. And I'm actually starting to believe
this quote that says men do not have commitment issues,
(20:50):
they just don't want to commit to you. Now, of course,
there are, you know, exceptions to the rule because everything
is circumstantial, But at the end of the day, I
actually do believe that it's just about finding who will
actually commit to you. Know this as a take home,
there is absolutely nothing wrong with being high maintenance. Guys
(21:12):
are going to either come up to the standards that
you have or it's going to highlight their lack of
being able to do that. You don't have to feel
guilty by giving your body to someone because they took
you on a couple of dates and they're doing what
they are supposed to do. Don't confuse the man that
(21:33):
is working and saving for his business and taking action
towards his business with the man that just has the
business idea and posts about it on Instagram all day.
Because let me tell you something, wealth is quiet, poor
is loud. You can always tell a lot about someone
by what they choose to share with the world. Oh yeah,
(21:58):
and of course we all like nice things, and you know,
we like to follow people that have luxury pages and
things of that nature. But you can kind of tell
the difference between those who have that as a brand
versus just the other types of girls and guys that
are posting that, because you kind of know that they
(22:19):
don't really have it like that, so they just got
to show that they got something you know what I mean,
know the difference, and remain a quality queen. So that
is the end of this video. Thank you for hanging
out with me today. I want to do a live
I will definitely keep you guys updated on when I
(22:40):
do it. I don't know if it's going to be
on YouTube or Instagram or maybe even both to accommodate
all my audiences on all my platforms, So stay tuned
for that, and do not forget that I love you,
and God loves you, and I will see angels
Hello angels, Welcome back to my channel. Today's video is
going to be a little chit chat video. I want
to talk to you guys. As you guys see from
the title of this video, this is about the power
of being high maintenance. Being high maintenance period stereotypically gets
a bad rep. We're gonna uncover all of that, but
(00:22):
you guys know the drill by now, if you've been
keeping up with my daily uploads, you would know to
follow me on Instagram. That will be right here, of course.
And also, do not forget to subscribe to this channel
if you have not already, turn on your post notifications
so that you're notified every single time that I post,
(00:42):
because I am posting every day for the rest of
the month. Also, if you have a question that you
would like to speak with me privately about or bent
to me anything of that nature, in my description box,
I have all my instinct go information, which which is
now available on both iPhones and androids without further ado,
(01:06):
let's get into this video. Okay, So we're gonna talk
today about the power of being high maintenance. Now, this
topic I discovered on one of my favorite author's websites.
Far from Basic by g. L. Lambert. He is absolutely
incredible and I love all of his content and I
found an article on this I wrote this video treatment
(01:30):
a while ago, so I don't remember what the name
of the article specifically was, but he has an incredible
website with incredible resources, and I will definitely provide the
link to his website in my description box below. So basically,
(01:50):
I just wanted to go over some of the key
points that I saw in his article inform you ladies,
as well as give my own insight as to what
I think about the power of being. I mean, it's
so rule of thumb, of course, is to only date providers.
I mean, I've said this since the beginning of time
on my channel. You should not ever enter into a
(02:13):
relationship without knowing that a man can provide for you.
And one of my favorite quotes in life in general
is the answer is never no, you're just asking the
wrong person. So in regards to relationships, what one person
won't do, another one will of that and more abundantly,
(02:36):
So keep that in mind. One of the things that
I love that G. L. Lambert said in his article
was that it's important to note that there's a difference
between a hard working man that's on the come up
versus like a bum that's looking for a come up.
And he said, do not confuse the hardworking man saving
(02:58):
for their business with the one that just has the
business idea. Wow. That really resonated with me. A lot
of the times we find ourselves in these situations, ladies,
right where, Oh, I'm just gonna stay with him, you know,
and build with him because I know that he has
(03:20):
all these inspirations. I remember one of my ex boyfriends
that I was dating when I was twenty one. He
had all these ideas and never executed any of them.
I mean, it was beyond pathetic to me. I guess
because I've always been fairly wise for my age. I
(03:40):
saw straight through whatever he was trying to pull over
my eyes. And I remember thinking to myself when he
was explaining to me, you know, this business idea that
he had, that he wasn't going to actually execute any
of this. He was just doing this or saying this
to me because it sounded great. But he couldn't even
(04:03):
sustain a job, you know. He was very heady, hot headed.
I just it was a disaster at the end of
the day. There's a general rule there are doers and
there are people that are talkers, and in general, men
should be doers more than talkers in general. So you
(04:25):
have a guy that's literally just a talker, yikes, you
have a problem, and it's not in Houston. Be smart,
pay attention, Know the difference between one that has an
idea and one that's actually building and taking action towards
(04:46):
his business endeavors. Being high maintenance gets such a bad
rep but I feel personally that whomever created that sort
of stereotype of being high maintenance as a negative thing
was clearly someone that was subpar. Because if you're not
(05:09):
in any way threatened by what I'm expecting, or maybe
even what I come with or what I even have
to offer, then why does it matter if I'm high maintenance?
Wouldn't you want to be with someone that has standards?
I would think. So there are men that are willing
(05:31):
to spend money on you to court you all of
these things without you having to be intimate with them.
This is very important because a lot of girls message
me from all different walks of life saying, oh my gosh,
this guy wants to sleep with me, and I feel
like he did take me to this nice place. You know.
(05:52):
You know, we've been dating for a month, so I
just feel like he's been consistent for that month, so
I feel like I should at least, you know, have
sex with him. Whatever the case is, No, you don't
have to. I would stretch that thing for as long
as possible, because it's easy for someone, especially a man
who's very determined, to be consistent when he really really
(06:17):
wants something. And the second you give it up, because
a month is very soon, everything is different. And the
first thing they tell you is nothing will change. Everything
will be the same. It won't be different. No, actually
it will be the exact opposite of what you just
tried to pull over my eyes. Hello. At the end
(06:38):
of the day, we all want a good looking man
who can buy us nice things. That is natural for
a woman. So what's important that I love? Oh my gosh,
this article is just so incredible. He said, Ladies, you
need to stop under selling yourself so that you don't
come across as a goal digger, because that's like everyone's
(07:00):
biggest fear, and guys love to throw that word around. Oh,
she's a gold digger, she's this, she's that. Baby. If
you had it, you wouldn't feel like that if you
had it, honey, Like, what do you expect to do?
You know when you're dating someone, because you don't want
to come across this high maintenance and you don't want
to seem like a gold digger. So you're gonna just
(07:22):
you know, Netflix and chill and waste your gas going
to his house delivering him yourself on a silver platter.
Are you well? I have to check in. I need
to ask quality queen control. Are you well? You don't
(07:43):
even realize half the stuff that we do? Ouh bring
to this guy's house. He lives thirty minutes away from you,
never once even bother to pay for your uber and
here you go. I'll be you right there, uh skirt, No,
I know that. For me, I require someone that's going
to be a gentleman. I've experienced dating guys that were
(08:05):
very chivalrous, and having those experiences, you just can't go
back where they effortlessly and naturally do things for you
because that's the way it's supposed to go. But you're
essentially doing because you're settling. You know, if you still
are doing the Netflix and chill thing, I cannot say
it enough. Maybe you need to stop today, all right,
(08:30):
looking for a sign? This was your sign? Stop selling
for that. Okay, you're paying him with your time to
give you a low budget time, and why would he
have any incentive to go above and beyond when he
never had to. You can't step in trying to be
low budget, low maintenance so that you can get the guy.
(08:54):
And then once you get the guy, then you want
to be yourself. Oh well, I want this, I want that.
He's gonna think, why do I need to give you that?
I never had to do that before, so why would
I start doing that now? All right? Now, we as
women need security financially, emotionally, we need that. Men need
their egos stroked. They need to feel respected and like
(09:17):
the hero. So let's be clear when I say this,
wanting to be courted and you know, expecting guys to
pay for dates that asks you out does not mean
that you are not independent. This is just a this
is a natural thing, you know, like the egg doesn't
(09:39):
chase the sperm. It's a natural thing. Be careful of
trying to come across as not needing this, not needing that,
because then that's an easy way to get taken advantage
of it's like, oh hmm, wow, that was easy. Well,
since she wants to be misindependent, he's going to do
(09:59):
one or two. He's going to not speak to you again,
or he's gonna play along if he's extra dusty and say, wow, okay,
I don't even have to pay for her to do
these dates. I mean, she is the one that even
wants to pay for the date that we went on.
And alpha males, you know, the ones that we want
(10:20):
to attract ideally, are not going to be attracted to
someone that has that sort of masculine energy of I
don't need a man to do this and that. Yes, ladies,
I understand, No, we do not need men. But you
can still be feminine and feel that way. And at
the end of the day, you can't lead that with
(10:41):
that mentality and expect to really go far. It pushes
men away, especially alpha males. What you will attract, in
essence are actually beta males that you what boss around
all the time and you go you pay all the
bills and house and you know, become the man of
(11:02):
the house and before you get carried away. Understand, if
that's the lifestyle you choose, I'm not upset, just don't
be upset at my lifestyle choices. I you know, I
don't get it. No, but the thing is like, I
don't get it. I know. This is a very controversial
(11:23):
topic of whether or not we as women should call
men out on certain things that they do, and from
a male perspective, I've heard this on multiple occasions. They
say that they actually like when women call them out
on their stuff because they feel like, wow, she's not
(11:43):
taking any nonsense. The way I view it is kind
of like this. If a guy basically approaches you and says, hey,
like we should totally go out some time for you know,
get drinks really quickly or coffee, you can say, oh,
thanks for offering. I do prefer to go to dinner
(12:05):
something a little bit more formal when getting to know somebody.
For instance, here's a real life situation. I was talking
to this guy before and he basically asked me out
on a date, and he told me, I will get
back to you on the time, but let's shoot for
(12:26):
seven thirty and I will update you throughout the day
if I can make it or not. So you know
what I did, I said, Okay, Typically I wouldn't do
something like that because I'm thinking to myself, I like dates.
Of course, we like dates that are set in stone,
because otherwise, to me, what I feel like you're doing
(12:48):
is you're basically telling me stay ready just in case
I end up being able to come or not, like
you can't be well. So whatever. The whole day goes by,
and it's six o'clock and he messages me saying hey
(13:09):
and hey, sorry, you know work, what's crazy? Whatever the
case is, And all I'm thinking is, so you couldn't
tell me at five, you couldn't tell me at four.
It's looking like things are not gonna end anytime soon.
Can we reschedule instead? You text me at six for
(13:33):
a date that's supposed to happen at seven point thirty,
telling me it looks like things you're getting are hectic.
Rough day at work. Honey, you knew that it's not
your first day on the job. You're part owner of
the place. You know how this runs, so please save it.
(13:55):
So you know what I said, Well, since I haven't
heard from you around five five thirty, I just figured
that it isn't happening at all, And if you want
to schedule a date with me, we can reschedule for
next week. Didn't even give him a date or anything
like that, because to me, I don't even like talking
to you at this point because this doesn't make sense
to me. And I'm not going to set the tone
of I'm waiting on you right now. No no, no, no, no,
(14:18):
you wanted me right Oh? Okay, cool, He's gonna say, oh, well,
is this time too late? Because I am already in
this area. I guess I'll just turn around and go,
you know, back to the city. And I'm thinking safe
travels on your way there, Like, what do you want
(14:43):
to know? I'm not no, so me setting that standard
and kind of calling him out on the fact that
he didn't text me till six o'clock okay, and the
last time we spoke at that time was around eleven
twelve pm. And you're going to message someone that you live,
(15:07):
you know, kind of a distance away from an hour
and a half before. Do you not understand how women work?
We have to do our hair and do our makeup,
all of those things. What did you expect that I
literally come like ready to you like a robot? Please stop? So?
(15:31):
According to g. L Lambert, he says that being picky
doesn't make you a nag. It makes you smart. Of course,
the delivery matters as well, But I actually do agree
with that, especially when you're trying to set the tone,
because I always tell you, guys, as long as you
let them do whatever they want, they're going to continue
(15:51):
doing whatever they want. And then by time you try
to change things because you just sick and tired and
sick and tired, they're not going to do it because
they know ever had to do it before. By that
time comes, it's like I might as well get a
whole new girl now, because what am I gonna, you know,
do new things for the old girl that I'm already
with when she already accepted my low effort behavior. I
(16:14):
think that's fair to think. So understand this being high
maintenance calling someone out setting the tone for something. Delivery
is everything. Delivery is everything. Remember what I just said,
will highlight one or two things their lack to meet
your standards or their ability to meet your standards. That's it.
(16:37):
So you need to ask yourself who benefits from being
a doormat to men? And I've seen this time and
time again. Do not build with any guy because he
will leave you. He will build with you and then
take what he built and move on to the next
chick and provide her with the entire life that you
spent building with him. Acrimony style. Being all maintenance doesn't
(17:02):
get the guy. I don't care how much you think
you're winning by yes, sing him to death and accepting
his behavior. I know how he is. I love him.
He does love me. He does love me. There's a difference.
There's levels to love. There's levels to love, especially with
men master compartmentalizers. Men rarely choose the girl that is
(17:23):
easy and convenient because you know what they're gonna do.
They're going to use us us until the next option
comes along. That's what they're gonna do. For instance, one
time I knew this guy. He was dating this girl
for a while off and on, but they weren't ever official,
And aside from the fact that she's you know, convenient
(17:44):
and very low maintenance, he would still go out and
look for other girls to date. But this girl that
was involved with him, she genuinely loves him, and at
the end of the day, it does feel good to
be loved, it really does. But as a man, they're
(18:06):
not going to stick around with you because of the
love you have for them. They're going to appreciate that,
if they even do from a distance. And go give
the love that you crave right on to the next chick.
And here's what I love, he said. Men will bend
backwards for women that are brave enough to simply ask
(18:29):
for more. We have so many excuses in our mouth.
I don't want to ask him, but he wants to
have sex with you. But like I don't know if
he but he already had sex with you. But I
just feel you're giving something. He wants something if you
didn't give it already. But you can't ask for anything
(18:52):
it's too much. So then what do you think your
value is? If you asking for any thing else is
too much? Oh, think about that. And like Gia Lambert said,
and you act like you don't need anything but his love,
he will exploit that and not appreciate it, but rather
(19:15):
take advantage and do the bare minimum. Wow, that is profound.
Don't be that girl. That's just Oh love is enough, honey.
Love does not pay the bills. People get divorced and
they still love each other, but they have financial issues
amongst other things, probably, but finances matter. Many people get
(19:39):
divorced over financial issues and their love cannot stretch to
pay that rent, to buy that child diapers? Who can
you pay with love? So I say all that to
say this twenty five and older my age, your aim
is and should be different. A list of your five
(20:01):
non negotiables and make them real tangible things. What are
your non negotiables for a husband? What are your no
negotiables for a boyfriend? You know he must have a car,
must make time for you. Obviously, ever is on your lists.
Just stick to it and do not compromise. Like I
discussed in previous videos earlier in this week, do not
start out in a relationship compromising all these key points
(20:26):
that I'm mentioning in this video. Ladies really do matter.
It's going to pay off to be high maintenance. If
you are high maintenance, you are hig maintenance. I'm high maintenance.
Ah sue me like men will raise to the standard
if they want you. And I'm actually starting to believe
this quote that says men do not have commitment issues,
(20:50):
they just don't want to commit to you. Now, of course,
there are, you know, exceptions to the rule because everything
is circumstantial, But at the end of the day, I
actually do believe that it's just about finding who will
actually commit to you. Know this as a take home,
there is absolutely nothing wrong with being high maintenance. Guys
(21:12):
are going to either come up to the standards that
you have or it's going to highlight their lack of
being able to do that. You don't have to feel
guilty by giving your body to someone because they took
you on a couple of dates and they're doing what
they are supposed to do. Don't confuse the man that
(21:33):
is working and saving for his business and taking action
towards his business with the man that just has the
business idea and posts about it on Instagram all day.
Because let me tell you something, wealth is quiet, poor
is loud. You can always tell a lot about someone
by what they choose to share with the world. Oh yeah,
(21:58):
and of course we all like nice things, and you know,
we like to follow people that have luxury pages and
things of that nature. But you can kind of tell
the difference between those who have that as a brand
versus just the other types of girls and guys that
are posting that, because you kind of know that they
(22:19):
don't really have it like that, so they just got
to show that they got something you know what I mean,
know the difference, and remain a quality queen. So that
is the end of this video. Thank you for hanging
out with me today. I want to do a live
I will definitely keep you guys updated on when I
(22:40):
do it. I don't know if it's going to be
on YouTube or Instagram or maybe even both to accommodate
all my audiences on all my platforms, So stay tuned
for that, and do not forget that I love you,
and God loves you, and I will see angels
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