Ep 57 - Hard Target - Swole Cinema

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:06):
What's up everybody? Hey, how's it going so well? Sent
them a time?

Speaker 2 (00:10):
That's right, your favorite time in the month, week, whatever.

Speaker 1 (00:15):
Your morning commute, it's gready to go. I'm Mark, I'm Ryan.
And on this episode, you thought we were going to
talk about Universal Soldier if you listen to the last episode.
Yeah yet, because we don't think so, you shouldn't think too.
Be fucked us over again. It's their thing. They love it.

Speaker 2 (00:37):
It was on to B when we picked it, and
then sure enough, seven days later it disappears.

Speaker 1 (00:42):
It's like, I don't know, I we're either really good
at picking expiring rights for movies.

Speaker 2 (00:48):
No, And I even looked at there was nothing by
it that said leaving soon. Yeah, they just too. B
is just fucking us.

Speaker 1 (00:56):
Not in a good way, not in a way that
we're like, maybe harder right even that not even yeah
then I'm snake me daddy.

Speaker 2 (01:05):
No, I'm not saying that.

Speaker 1 (01:10):
Here's the nineties.

Speaker 2 (01:11):
So we had to pick another one that we didn't
say out loud, so it was still on to B
when we watched it. But I think you're gonna be
happy because this is uh, this is special.

Speaker 1 (01:24):
I mean, I think it's one of the highest rated
movies of this particular particular actor. I think it is
hard target Jean Claude Van.

Speaker 2 (01:32):
Dam also starring Jean Claude Van Dam's mullet Man.

Speaker 1 (01:38):
Was it glorious, wasn't it? It was? It belonged in
the eighties. It was so glorious. Yeah, what was what movie?
What year was this? Like ninety six? I think, yeah,
I don't know, it was mid It was how much
research I did? Yeah, I mean I watched it and went,
that's amazing. What I do know?

Speaker 2 (01:54):
It was so wet, Oh yeah, the whole time, like
he had like some serious gel in it or I
don't know. Louisiana and New Orleans is just ever. It's
just always swampy. So your hairs.

Speaker 1 (02:06):
I'm pretty sure that it was a perm because it was.
It was curly, wavy and the whole time, like what
was that movie with Eddie Murphy Coming to America? The
guy had the sole glow? Not sure, I'm so glow.
I'm pretty sure Van Damn had the soul glow. Yeah,
he had. It was it was beautiful, Yeah, and didn't
wave like there was scenes where there's a lot of

(02:28):
slow mo scenes, but the hair in slow mo. So
that's what I was like, it had to be it
was an art, it was early it had to be
early nineties, right, but it was Yeah, just a just
a great hair that one. And I want to know,
I'm pretty sure whenever this movie was released. Six months
after that, the Duster also peaked. Oh yeah, because so

(02:50):
many people wearing dusters in this in this movie, like
the the main good guy, the main bad guy, the
second highest bad guy, everybody wearing the of them's wearing
dusters in this movie. Yeah, like it was the Old West. Yeah, yeah,
and it only made me think of.

Speaker 2 (03:06):
It might as well have been because literally, like there
was nobody on the streets.

Speaker 1 (03:11):
No, yeah, it was. It was a very weird.

Speaker 2 (03:13):
I think they briefly tried to set this movie up
that the cops are on strike, right, yeah, so therefore
this lawlessness.

Speaker 1 (03:26):
And they were like they were down there.

Speaker 2 (03:27):
Would call that the Big Easy But was it kind
of near Bourbon Street, Yeah, I think it was.

Speaker 1 (03:32):
It was very deep, like because I think that's maybe
that's why they positioned there, because of like Jean Claude's
like French accent, where they could go like, oh, it's
this Cajun creole, you know, like that to really play
into it.

Speaker 2 (03:43):
But he didn't change his accent. Oh no, he just.

Speaker 1 (03:49):
Whatever it is. Yeah, but yeah, they that was such
a quick minor note because they like they had all
the cops like out in front of the precinct like
on strike. They didn't really have a reason to strike.
It just like, hey we're on strike. Set one cop. Right,
there was like two detectives of somehow, like I don't
know if they didn't get in the union or what.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
I was like, your detective, you like when you're like
become a management level. Maybe I don't know how it works, right,
I was the same way.

Speaker 1 (04:18):
I was like, wait a minute, there was just so
many people strike at all the ones striking out front
were uniform cops. Yeah, yep, so.

Speaker 2 (04:25):
All the ones that still were working were playing clothes.

Speaker 1 (04:28):
So maybe the shit I had to be here today
because I'm not in the union anymore. I don't know,
but it was.

Speaker 2 (04:35):
A very convenient way to say, why the hell no
cops ever showed up when there should have been cops.

Speaker 1 (04:43):
Yeah, I didn't even think about that.

Speaker 2 (04:44):
I just even the cops showed up, they did a
terrible job.

Speaker 1 (04:49):
If they did not dig deep. No, they're half. I
mean it really was a shit show. Luckily Chance Boudreau
was on the case. That's right. Yeah, Van Damp plays
a Chance who Dreau. And then there's one the lead,
the love interest. It's like, asked him about his name.
He's like, my mom took a chance on me or

(05:10):
something like that, and she had me my mom took
a I'm like, oh boy, yeah, that's uh. I don't
know what you're saying there, Jean Claude.

Speaker 2 (05:17):
But yeah, this film, uh, this is the second John
wu movie we talked about.

Speaker 1 (05:23):
The other one was Face Off, Face Off. I don't
know whenever I saw that come up, as like, oh shit,
John Woo. And you know what I thought of birds?
We get birds like well, we get birds like not
as near as many Johns in Face Off, but we
get him like a very important role right away in
the movie. Yeah, like so so uh, Chance Woodreau is

(05:49):
gets caught in this this weird game of like uh,
the most dangerous game type shit where.

Speaker 2 (05:54):
Hunting the most dangerous animal, but not really like it's
like but they picked that.

Speaker 1 (06:01):
It's like hunting the most dangerous game and the most
dangerous game has two hands tied behind this back and
and is limping like the most ridiculous ship. It's basically
a premise of hey, rich white people get to shoot people,
like they would like to know what it's like to
kill someone, and they go do that. They they're picking
homeless people, but you know they oh god, they got

(06:22):
they got they have morals because they're picking. So they're
in the military, you know, not just any homeless.

Speaker 2 (06:29):
They wanted somebody that could fight back.

Speaker 1 (06:31):
It was so shitty, They're like they it was so
it was so shitty, But I could see how that
type of person would justify it by like, well, we
try to pick like ex military, like ex military holmoss. Yeah,
good call.

Speaker 2 (06:44):
Wait really yeah, because they're they're up on all their protein.
They need, you know, and everything to have, you know,
get in there and give you a run for your money. Now,
they were just picking. They were picking easy targets. But
they would also have like the rich guy that paid
for the hunt, Lance Henderson, the bad guy. Yeah, he
they would have like twenty henchmen. Oh yeah, it was

(07:06):
helping hunt him down, like like the rich guy didn't
actually have to do the hunt really.

Speaker 1 (07:10):
So yeah, that was so the opening scene is a
guy you just there. It's just these guys like just
playing with this guy trying to reach whatever. You don't understand.
He's just trying to run away. And they're just guys
on motorcycles. Guys and cars O the fucking guys on motorcycle. Yeah,
there's like literally ten guys after this one. And he's
just running running. You don't know what's happening. And he's

(07:32):
crossbos than you guys launching crossbows at him. You learn
that the guy with the crossbows is just the rich,
rich white guy that paid to kill a human. And
they're like, oh, if he gets to the river, he wins,
And I'm like, they would never honor that. After you
get farther in the movie, You're like, they would never
honor they he gets to the you can't have that happen.

(07:54):
But I say he did to the river. Oh yeah,
like that's what was. As soon as his feet he
was the river, he was on a bridge. I'm like
and he he yeah, he Why did he running across
this bridge? There was like a boat.

Speaker 2 (08:06):
He was going to get in the boat, and the
the bridge there was a couple of boards gave way.
He fell into the river. I'm like, he won, right,
Oh yeah, he made it right, That's that's that's what
cracked me. But you're right, it doesn't matter, right.

Speaker 1 (08:19):
I think they maybe that was to establish like, oh,
if he gets the river, we don't care, we're going
to kill him because he knows too much. Like he
knows we hunted him. So these guys are not going
to play fair. So why is the hunted? Why would
you play a fair?

Speaker 2 (08:32):
So if you if you had a five minute head
start before I came after you, but I just gave
you ten grand Yeah, well in modern society, well that
probably wouldn't work, Like why don't why just not uber
get an uber to the river?

Speaker 1 (08:47):
Well, I mean modern yeah, but that was back because
I was remember in the nineties, okay, like cab get
a cab? Right? That was the whole thing with Like,
while I was watching it was how the bad guys
knew so much where each other were. Like I was like,
this is this is nineteen early nineties, before cell phones,
before before you could just get like, yeah, I got him,

(09:08):
he's over on X Street. Let's go get him. Like
but even so, like it's.

Speaker 2 (09:13):
They definitely give a five minute head start.

Speaker 1 (09:15):
So way late in the movie they it opens with
they're killing you know this guy, and then later in
the movie they set up there you finally get the
rest of the premises where the next their next victim
is a homeless guy and they they're in a train
station and a roundabout and they say, you've got a
five minute headstart. If you get to the river, you
get to keep this ten grand money grip money belt.

(09:37):
Uh Otherwise, like like they make it pretty clear we're
going to kill you. Yeah. Like this this old white
steps out of a car.

Speaker 2 (09:44):
With uh care. We call him runners.

Speaker 1 (09:49):
It's like one hundred dollars, yeah, to sign an application application,
and they're all excited as soon as you get there.
They're not giving an ultimatum. They're basically like you get
the feeling like, oh, hey, you're going to you're gonna
take this ten grand money belt and try to get
to the river and win or you're another reason that
they're homeless because that ten grand, Oh yeah, you're like,

(10:10):
all right in nineteen ninety two, that's half a year's
salary for a a oh yeah, you know, like you
can live a long time on ten grand if you're homeless.
So so it's very appealing. But so you know, the
if you say no, it's like, oh, yeah, you probably
just gonna kill you. No, yeah, but they yeah, they

(10:31):
they give you there like you got a five minute
head start to get ten miles or whatever. I'm like,
five minute, that's it. You have all the resources in
the world and you're getting a five minute head start.

Speaker 2 (10:40):
It's not really like a hunt.

Speaker 1 (10:42):
No, it's it's so it's like it's just so I.

Speaker 2 (10:45):
Know there's another movie. I'll find it. But we're same premise.
They're hunting humans, but they're out in the woods. Yeah,
they got ATVs again, fucking motorcycles gotta be involved. But
it seemed like there was this more they were more
were of a hunt where this was like let him,
let him run a mile and then we'll just chase
him down with everything we have and murder them and

(11:07):
then boom.

Speaker 1 (11:08):
I just made I think he was.

Speaker 2 (11:09):
Charging like half a million dollars yeah to uh to
hunt a human?

Speaker 1 (11:14):
Yeah? Oh yeah. But but that's why I love the
like I love the preface movies like, oh, it's a
half a million dollars and do this, and like this
is my equivalent to the guys that go, oh, I
just killed a lion in Africa. Bah bah like you
you paid a ton ship a ton of money. Yes,
sit in a place where they baited in a line,

(11:35):
and you shot it like even the because he Lance Hendry,
Uh I forget I forget her bad name.

Speaker 2 (11:41):
Oh yeah, I forget his name. But Lance says earlier
when uh, when they're like, you know what, this will
be the last hunt in New Orleans. We got to
find a spot like this or that, you know, lots
of woods and castles. Man, we could do it for
a long time in areas like that. So this is
like their game.

Speaker 1 (12:02):
They were doing it like it basically says they've already
moved like to it. So it is no.

Speaker 2 (12:06):
Different than if you pay to go to hunt. It's
a honey preserve. They basically fence in.

Speaker 1 (12:14):
Yeah, the uh the the mark So yeah, like is
that really? I mean, we're talking about killing humans, So
with me, it's not really hunting these rich people, that's
not really hunting. Bro. No, they got that. They got
this in corner for you just walk up and shoot, right,
So you're half a million dollars to just like field.
It's like the murder murder some one base.

Speaker 2 (12:34):
But it's great, like we're building up to like when
they get their come up and then we're like, yeah,
fuck you right, because that was I wasn't defending the
I'm building up.

Speaker 1 (12:43):
No, these guys are these guys are That was they
need a face kick, right. That was like the best
part of the I think, like of building the building
the movie was like for the final hunt of what
ends up obviously Chance Boudreaux, but they and all the
guys some New Orleans that were a part of this,

(13:03):
So you're like, good, they're all you know, they're all
gonna fucking die her death and that's that makes you
feel good because they're all terrible people. But they do
kill the guy in the beginning, and man, we just
go right in after his death, uh too, like what
like a trans am or whatever, just camarow camaro.

Speaker 2 (13:23):
Pulling up and it's a Yancey Butler.

Speaker 1 (13:26):
Oh who uh you know?

Speaker 2 (13:28):
I I know her from a TV show called Witchblade,
which is based on a comic book. All right, well
then she was also the mom in.

Speaker 1 (13:36):
Uh kick ass. Yes, I mean the mom of the
bad guy. Her look was very nineties as well, because
I also I went and I was like, oh, is
this like another Linda Fiorentino, because I got a very
similar look like there's and there was a lot of
actresses at that time had that similar look, and I
was like, this is so nineties. I love it.

Speaker 2 (13:55):
It was very evident right out of the bat, right
out of the gate that uh, it's the daughter of
the person's probably just got killed and now she's down
looking for him. It really like hit you over the
head with that, man?

Speaker 1 (14:06):
Does it? Like? I felt no sympathy on that front.

Speaker 2 (14:10):
Well, no, it's why I felt like the acting the
whole movie kind of shifted a little bit into some
I don't know. The cinematography just was weird. Yeah, we're like,
can we.

Speaker 1 (14:19):
Get back to action? Right? It was one of those
where the setups were over the head, you know, like everything,
but which was fine. I didn't care, like nineties, right,
it was the nineties. I fucking loved it. But they
made it just over the top, like hey, we you Hey,
we're gonna set this big fight scene up and you're
gonna we're gonnahit over the head and why we're setting

(14:40):
up Like she walks into a soup kitchen flashing like
just pulling out like a couple of grand cash to
get some quarters for a pay phone, just put them
through a hundred dollar dollar bill. Yeah, and of course
there's some sketchy dudes, right, but there's chance, right chances
there eating some gumbo and having a cup of coffee,

(15:01):
which which I don't think there's two go together. Rich
Well crack him up because like they have like this
cute little exchange exchange between him and the waitress like
about not paying, and then he like pushes his hand
over with like exact changes is probably like sixty four
cents or something of that effect of paying for his
cup of gumbo, so you know, like it's it's a charity,

(15:22):
so super kitchen, where ever he was very cheap for
like most people they are homeless. But obviously, Yeah, then
he sees like this chick just wanders in like he
doesn't know where she's at, flashing hundreds and hundreds of dollars,
and yeah, there's some sketchy guys in the corner that
he sees him. When he walks out, he knows, oh,
he saw it, so he knows there's some bad dudes
that saw it. He marked him.

Speaker 2 (15:42):
Yeah, Yeah, Like when he's leaving, he gets the reflection
the window. He could tell they're like, yeah high balling.
Oh yeah yeah, so he you know, he's.

Speaker 1 (15:50):
Got it right, and he's he's a he's a former
seman with martial arts skills. Semen. That's they like to
market him as in this movie, a former seman with
martial arts skills.

Speaker 2 (16:02):
But this kid is like, I mean, we knew what's
gonna happen.

Speaker 1 (16:05):
You see Van dam. We know it's gonna be finny fight.
We're gonna establish how he's a badass.

Speaker 2 (16:10):
Which I'm down, And it did not. It really didn't disappoint.
But it's funny as ship too. There's so these guys. Yes,
she goes to get in your car and they're gonna
they come take her purse. I'm pretty sure that one
guy was bending her over the car. I was thinking
about doing, you know, some rape ship. He already hered.

Speaker 1 (16:28):
He like like that was.

Speaker 2 (16:29):
Like, wait, we're are we're on the street in daylight. No,
there actually was a couple of people looking, but they
nobody was doing ship like, man, what the fuck is
happening to sound?

Speaker 1 (16:40):
Oh, cops are on right, And I never even thought
about it, but I did question.

Speaker 2 (16:44):
We didn't know they were on strike at this point,
yet she didn't go to the police station, right.

Speaker 1 (16:47):
Maybe maybe yeah, but yeah, that was I don't know.
I don't remember, but I remember, but I do remember
like thinking that like this is broad daylight and these
dudes like they just stole all her money and they're
like they're definitely gonna rape this hip. Yeah yeah, and
then there's there's chance to say that.

Speaker 2 (17:03):
Ship but he does, like he does this move, but
it had me laughing. So he's he's dialoguing these guys,
you know, the fight's about to happen, and he pulls
his duster back like the old West, like he'd be
revealing his gun. Yeah, like you know that, you know,
high noon Showdown.

Speaker 1 (17:21):
But obviously he pulled his jacket back to unleash his
biggest weapon, his right leg, and he just starts kicking
the ship out of people. It was it was so
great that he like it was because they they made
it like they did.

Speaker 2 (17:36):
Right, I'm gonna pull this kind of like like some
undertones are like Western style.

Speaker 1 (17:42):
I immedily felt like that was the show, Like I'm unarmed,
but I'm still gonna kick your ass like this because
the one guy had a knife and he he made
it known like I don't have I'm not afraid of you,
and he pulled it back. I don't have a gun
on me. But yeah, like it was so good. It
was so good how it was like that was such
a good film film aspect of like I'm not armed,

(18:04):
and I'm going to show you that because I want
you to know that I'm not.

Speaker 2 (18:07):
See I saw it as like when the cowboy pulls
it back to get his weapon, like so de van
damn possibly both in the dustry out of the way
of my best weapon, right, Yeah, it works.

Speaker 1 (18:17):
Because yeah, you don't have a gun. And it's like
because it was great because then the guy with the
knife was like they both went like, oh he doesn't
have a gun. He did. He's like maybe three fifty
seven magnum kicked in the face my size ten bam.

Speaker 2 (18:31):
Oh, and he was so high kicking almost so many
there was no leg kicks, but people were like he
had he was kicking like head shots, chomping headshots, like
legit boots on people Like I'm.

Speaker 1 (18:45):
I don't consider myself like a huge tough guy or anything,
but that's so like I don't think I could take
a head kick from a martial artist at all, yet
alone one wearing a Tinderland, like like, that's another five
pounds of kick. And you're like, and these guys are
just eating them And I mean they would get knocked down,
but they'd come back. I'm like, I don't know if

(19:05):
i'd take a roundhouse from a Timberland or a heel
kick from a Timberland.

Speaker 2 (19:09):
That's why it's way that one guy hate to break.

Speaker 1 (19:11):
His arm, right, yeah, yeah, so yeah, the guy with
a knight like those two the media, Well, the one
guy kicks on the hood of that Camaro and I'm like, oh,
that's an eighties camera because that hood must be steel
because it didn't buckle. A man just fell on that
hood of a camaro. Fucking pristine. Still, yeah, that whole
the whole scene is great. But now we know he's

(19:33):
a chance. Yeah, he's a badass. You know, he's like
former military, he knows he's a he's been on boats.
He's fucking great.

Speaker 2 (19:41):
Yeah, and then she goes to the cops because she's
still trying to find her dad.

Speaker 1 (19:46):
Right. I do know one thing we could see on
the look of her face, she went, he kicked four
guys asses she was DTF. Oh it comes up later
like the look on her face like she had blood
blood coming down her mouth, and she was like, I
fucked this guy on the hood of my camaro right now.

Speaker 2 (20:05):
Well, because she knows it's a well made American steel,
it's not gonna buckle right.

Speaker 1 (20:11):
One can take a licking, bro.

Speaker 2 (20:16):
But what a great scene. And ban Dam is all
about the kicks, Yes, so much so. But yeah, so
she goes to the police station to found this from
person report. Cops are on strike, only one officer on duty.
Detective I assuming she's playing clothes Detective Surly. Yeah, she's
got like she's got like a birthday cake.

Speaker 1 (20:38):
She's like, weird situation.

Speaker 2 (20:41):
She lights the candle that uh nat her name was
nat Natalie, Natasha, Natasha. She walks in and then the
cop just puts the cake with the lick candle.

Speaker 1 (20:53):
In your side. I didn't understand the whole situation, understand
such an awkward interaction. I just worked a double shift.
I don't think you should be working at all. It
seems like your whole precincts unstruck. Yeah, a little back
and forth.

Speaker 2 (21:09):
Uh, she takes some of the information. Uh. Nat Lee's
and then cop pulls the uh the door opened to
get her cake and the candles burnt down almost to
the very En'm.

Speaker 1 (21:19):
Like, it's only been like a minute and a half,
two minutes maybe tops. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (21:23):
I also like, you're gonna need the cake because there's
wax all over it.

Speaker 1 (21:28):
Now.

Speaker 2 (21:28):
I just didn't I didn't understand the scene.

Speaker 1 (21:30):
Uh. I don't know, because in my head, I went,
did she it was supposed to be funny? Did she
wish for that lady to find like her husband, her
dad's kill her then, or like find her husband find.

Speaker 2 (21:42):
You thought maybe there was some message right in that can.

Speaker 1 (21:46):
That's all that's I was grasping, because she did, she said,
And I was like, why do you still lit things
and just let it?

Speaker 2 (21:52):
I thought, aside comedy because for me, like there's a
lot of like little comedy notes that are just not
really that funny and almost like, man if I could
just tweak some of this, the action movie is slightly better.
Come into one liners like leave those to Arnold, you

(22:12):
don't need this movie doesn't need it.

Speaker 1 (22:14):
No, it's it's all kind of serious. But yeah, like
that was the only thing I could come up with
was when she pulled it back out, and she blew
it out. I was like, Oh, she wishing for her
to find her dad or something silly like that. That's
the only thing I can come up with why they
would pull it back out. Lit, I quite understand the scene.

Speaker 2 (22:32):
But Nat, the love interest.

Speaker 1 (22:35):
She tracks easily, like she's just as good as the
police in this town.

Speaker 2 (22:41):
Easily finds chance.

Speaker 1 (22:43):
She's like, have anybody seen a guy in a duster? Yeah,
that's not evil. Any other things you can tell me?
He has a sweet, greasy mullet. Oh yeah, no, he's
down here at the ship yard because a perm a
permanent duster looks fuckable.

Speaker 2 (23:01):
Yeah no, but she, yeah, she finds out the docks.
He's trying to get a job. I guess he's a
merchant marine. He got out of the marines and went
into the merchant marines. Yeah, he does get picked. But
his uh oh, his union dudes and seventeen bucks. So
the guy's like, look, we do not sail until next week.

(23:24):
You get that money.

Speaker 1 (23:24):
Yeah, we gotta get you. Witch on the ship.

Speaker 2 (23:27):
Because she was asking him like, hey man, I don't
pay you to help me find my dad.

Speaker 1 (23:30):
He's like, nope, I got a job right as soon
as he got turned down, and he was like, hey,
I will take that money. It was such a fun
reveal though, right, like he apparently sprinted across the entire
ship yard shipyard, and she was leaving her barrow, and
as they pull a pallet of barrels away, there he
is and all his mullet glory. Yeah and dusty. Yeah,
ready for a job. I worked with two hundred and
seventeen dollars for two days. Two days.

Speaker 2 (23:52):
Yeah, I'll help you find your dead. Really two days?
How good are you?

Speaker 1 (23:57):
He's like, well, you know what.

Speaker 2 (23:58):
As it turns out, he clue after clue he killing Yeah,
he's killing it, dude.

Speaker 1 (24:03):
He went to a police sight and found a clue
within thirty seconds. The place are not doing a good joleal,
they suck, there's only five Yeah, but yes, we can't
get to that. Uh I know. I was just gonna say,
like he gets to Uh so after that, like she
finds out our dad's dead. Oh, got her dad's dead.
So they find out her dad's dead and they say

(24:24):
he was on a fire in this abandoned building and
they show it.

Speaker 2 (24:27):
Yeah, but before that, though, isn't that do they does
he find out. Oh, they find out dead after they
went to the guy who has like.

Speaker 1 (24:36):
The strip club. Oh no, they the guy that was
hanting made got homeless people to hand out is like
sex fly.

Speaker 2 (24:41):
Yeah, so I found this scene funny because uh, chance
takes net to He's like, I got a friend who
might know and it's wrong. Yeah, she already kind of
talked to yep, but Roper helps out. He's like, you
know what, man, I got to I got this guy.

Speaker 1 (24:58):
He said it.

Speaker 2 (24:59):
So somebody found a shopping cart full of her dad's ship.

Speaker 1 (25:03):
Right, it was important to established Roper is a good
guy at that point.

Speaker 2 (25:06):
Yes, well, but but also every homeless guy I guess
left that card alone.

Speaker 1 (25:13):
Yeah, well he had a guy, wasn't it for him? Okay,
that's whenever he had got through, he's like, hey, thanks,
had his sleeping bag with his name on it, had
a suitcase they opened up and had her letters and
she was sending him her dad. Very sentimental moment.

Speaker 2 (25:24):
I'm like part of me was like, oh no, everything
would have been stolen out there.

Speaker 1 (25:30):
Well, that that's why they had he had to have
the guy watch it because she knew she was looking
for him. Thanks, Charlie because Charlie walked away. Then and
then Ruper pulls out a stack of flyers with duty
next drop line, Yeah, it's great, and what's chances?

Speaker 2 (25:44):
Were like, He's like, don't don't take offense to that.

Speaker 1 (25:46):
Yeah. It was like he probably did that for money,
which is and they both it was great because him
and Roper are both like, yeah, we both did it.
Like you hand him out to make money. Yeah, I
get it. Hey you're homeless, sure.

Speaker 2 (25:58):
Yeah boom yep.

Speaker 1 (26:00):
Like again, Roper like, should just I mean a chance,
should have been a cop. You're like Batman in it.

Speaker 2 (26:07):
You were just you were tracking down like leads like,
well he does have two days, like two days, two
days to find your let's get this going. Yeah, but
that leads him to, uh, what's his name Pope or pope?

Speaker 1 (26:22):
Oh I forgot Randall I thought or something I don't know,
like the fact that, yeah, the fat guy, but very
like just grow.

Speaker 2 (26:33):
You know, he's a right as soon as you take
one look at him, you're like, oh shit, he's gone back.
They make this he's definitely involved somehow. They just yeah,
they just make this guy look like a very villainy poorn.

Speaker 1 (26:43):
No skezy slide. Yeah, he's the most stereotypical, like just
the fat guy with a mustache and balding. Looks like
he would take advantage of anybody he could. Like they
very he's a very stereotypical looking gig dude.

Speaker 2 (26:55):
But they they ask Hi a few questions. He definitely
like he he's going to give up information. This guy
has no uh scruples yeah, or will power yeah, or
but uh the Mummy interrupts.

Speaker 1 (27:09):
He's got a little Debbie on you. Yeah, just give
this guy a little demmi oh the moment. That's greatmmy,
because as soon as I motet, like it was one
of those things where I was watching this movie and
I was like, I'm sure I saw it back in
the day, because this is movies I grew up on.
But I was like, I don't remember anything about it,
which was great to watch it again. And as soon

(27:29):
as I saw him, I was like, this dude's a
villain in all the movies in the nineties, right, Like
he's such a villain.

Speaker 2 (27:33):
I feel like with Lance Henderson and this guy, they
had like new villains. Yeah, Like I know the Mummy
was supposed to be the like henchman, like his main henchman.
And I'm like, oh, no, either either or it could
be the main villain really right, Uh yeah, So the
one guy I forget his name, but he he was
the Mummy in Brandon Brendan Frasier's The Mommy back in

(27:57):
the early.

Speaker 1 (27:57):
Nineties, right, which made me go in to search for like,
I know this guy on internet like what was he in?
What was this? The other big movies and that was
like one of his first big roles. I was like,
it's like, yep, he was in Mummy, and which made
me go like all right, because I was on I
was on Rotten Tomatoes and maybe like oh all right,
so because I went like, oh, this is one of
the like Van Dam's like best reviewed movies, like are

(28:19):
critically claimed as if you want to say, so, this
one was a like a sixty one and The Mummy
was like a sixty two. I was like woo, because
the Mummy is a movie no one really trashes, saying
like yeah, no, I think that, yeah that's something we
could uh we could watch for sure, and but yeah,
so I was like, oh, so the people were saying
this is pretty much as good as the Mummy I'm
like all right, but yeah, that was that was this

(28:40):
big one of his big breakout roles where you everybody
would see him from a kind of a blockbuster perspective,
but he has such a great fucking villainy look, like
oh yeah, dark eyes and like yeah long, yeah, just
very very good look for a bad guy. Yeah, he
kind of interrupts their moment, so they leave, and that's
when the detective, but one of the few cops working okay,

(29:03):
who must maybe a good detective, he found where they
were they were at.

Speaker 2 (29:08):
Yeah again, like how did this cop just come right
up to your car, like, hey, we got information about
your dad?

Speaker 1 (29:13):
How'd you know we were here? I'm a detective, That's
what I do. Sorry, we found your dad. He's he
was burning a fire, yeah building the other night. So
they go through that a little bit. My brain farted,

(29:34):
but yeah, they go to and they see she hands
them like, well, here's here's my favorite part is to
go he was badly burning in his building. Uh, And
she goes, oh, can I see him? And they're like,
he was badly burning. I had to use the dental
dental records as she hands them a dog tag. Yeah,
it was like.

Speaker 2 (29:53):
And then then later though, like Chance has the whole
file with the burnt body pictures, like what the fuck
the cop in this town or just they wouldn't just
get a chance to write.

Speaker 1 (30:03):
In the file. Oh yeah, Well she goes, she hands them,
like you see her hand the medical records to the daughter,
and Chance just grabs them and takes them. It was
so funny, like that's he's not even like rule of
the fuck.

Speaker 2 (30:16):
But I think he even had like a doctor like
that's evidence, Like why are you handing this photo to people?

Speaker 1 (30:22):
Well that was like that cracked me up too, because
he gets this, he gets this evidence file. You know,
she doesn't see him because he's badly burn And the
next scene is him at the crime scene digging in
ashes for like oh now before that though, before he's
digging in the ashes because you know, something's not.

Speaker 2 (30:41):
Something's not right to Chance. So as he's hanging out
at his apartment wherever, looking at the pictures, and he
has the one dog tag yeah, oh yeah, dove flies
in Oh yeah, that was and lands where Chances hung
his dog tags on like a little hook.

Speaker 1 (30:58):
The dove lands right there. Chance looks at the dove.
He's like, yeah, you're right or something too. Yeah, I
don't he didn't say this too, but yeah, like he's
talking to dove, talking to the dove. I went only
funck John will the dove was a message. God damn it,
John Woo, you're everywhere, because like I didn't know like

(31:19):
anything about John Woo until we did face off. You
kind of told me like some of the things about him,
and I was like, oh fuck John. As soon as
I said to be you see a bird right at
the beginning, like John Wood directed by Jon was like,
oh ship, there's gonna be fucking birds and birds. And
then it wasn't until like five minutes later, I like,
I haven't seen any birds yet, and I'm like, oh no.
There's a huge spot point where a bird told uh

(31:39):
Boudreau that hey, remember everyone else everyone has two dog tags.

Speaker 2 (31:43):
Speaking of huge, there's a I thought you think he
can one up himself?

Speaker 1 (31:47):
Yes he had.

Speaker 2 (31:48):
There's a huge bird moment at the end of this movie.
We're going many birds. Well, yeah, this bird helped Chance
be like, you're right.

Speaker 1 (31:57):
Then he goes just digging dig in the ashes, dandomly
digging in ashes of a fire that was still smoldering
apparently that was so great.

Speaker 2 (32:04):
There's something like you know, police caution tape or whatever.

Speaker 1 (32:07):
But yeah, they didn't try again again cos they're on strike.

Speaker 2 (32:11):
Yep, that's why things are so loose. I think that's
also why the bad guy like, yeah, we could tell
you do it in New Orleans, uh for this season
because the cops are on strike.

Speaker 1 (32:23):
Right Uh? He what? He spent like.

Speaker 2 (32:26):
Thirty seconds like and he found the other dog tag.

Speaker 1 (32:29):
I loved that. There was like no, just blatantly, not
even like a time lapse, just he walked in, scribbled
some ashes around a little bit and like you heard
a tink. Oh, and there's a dog tag with a
hole on it. Boom boom roasted. Oh the two of.

Speaker 2 (32:47):
Lance, uh, Lance Hendrick's henchman show up, but like the
two worst two that. I'm like, oh, I could take them.

Speaker 1 (32:54):
Well, I don't know, because they somehow got a new
I got to jump immediately, Like wasn't even close. There
was nothing around, it was like ashes. How did they
even sneak up? Oh? Yeah, I don't like that was
the fun.

Speaker 2 (33:05):
He was locked into detective mode when he was sifting
the ashes. All his senses went like he did radar
into the like he was he was an avatar mode
because the guy just beat the ship out of four
like oh yeah he not ye, hey, where was the
fucking dove on this one? Fight the dove land Like, Yo,
you're about to get your ass kicked.

Speaker 1 (33:26):
You're right just coming, you will come and everything comes
in twos. But no, he gets he gets pretty bodied. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (33:34):
Well, they do manage to get like a noose around
on probably something like like a dog catcher would use,
the kind of they.

Speaker 1 (33:41):
Get that around his nag. I mean, I feel like
he tried to kill him, but they were unsuccessful because
he follows his way out. Yeah. But then the next thing,
you know, he's somehow arrested, like.

Speaker 2 (33:50):
Yeah, well he crossed the police line again by a.

Speaker 1 (33:54):
Cop that was on strike. Wait stop thinking about this ship.

Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yeah oh yeah, but it's cool they barely in convenient,
say right, they brought.

Speaker 1 (34:05):
Him to the station and let him go anyway because
he could lie across. But because he had a dog
that he was like, I got evidence, bitches.

Speaker 2 (34:12):
Oh should we get a freshy come back after these
commercial messages? Sure all right, got to make that money.

Speaker 1 (34:24):
Ah, we're back and better than ever.

Speaker 2 (34:28):
Right when we last left off Chance was trying to
have sex with that.

Speaker 1 (34:33):
No, I mean crying. I feel like it happened. I
love that. The the bad guys, uh they tracked, Yeah,
they tracked down the where they go to the the
fat guys. Yeah place I guess it would Timidate but

(34:53):
he wait, oh no, he fell asleep and the Mummy
comes in and Karate chops him on his belly. I
just thought that looked hilarious because it's straight up like
Judo jo on his belly, and I'm like, I don't
know if you know anything about fat people, but hitting
them in our guts not a huge thing. I watched
Droyan Nelson fight in UFC. If a bunch of them

(35:15):
into belly was like, cool, keep doing that. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (35:17):
So the Mummy and Lance show up to Timid theys
guy I get, oh, because they were pissed at like he.

Speaker 1 (35:22):
Didn't get the guy they wanted. Like as as people
that kill people for a living, do they do well not?
I don't know, but like these guys were really doing
their research looking for guys that were combat veterans, but
also like no real relatives that we're going to look
for them exactly, you know, you want that guy with
no strings attached sets the guys and now.

Speaker 2 (35:45):
They have the daughter, you know, and they didn't get
the guy look snooping around.

Speaker 1 (35:49):
Yep, because you know, he had family that apparently didn't
talk to hihim really for three years or two years whatever,
which I was like, fuck her for not like making contacts,
like and she wanted to make contact, but she said
she was writing letters, right, so where are you sending them?
If you didn't know where he was, where were you
sending the letters? Yeah, because the detective was like, yes,

(36:10):
he could move around from different homeless shelters maybe, Well,
that was what the detective asked him, like, well, what
was his home address? When she's following the missing person,
She's like, I didn't find out now that he would
until then he was he was homeless. And I'm like, yeah,
well what was the address you're sending those letters to?
Because he apparently got them all because he had them
bundled on his right little plot hole there. God damn

(36:31):
it they were, and they were so bun off so sweetly.
Oh yeah, it was like it was treasured memories.

Speaker 2 (36:38):
Look, if I understand that roper was protecting that cart, yeap,
those things would have been rifled through, not even by
the homeless, just by like a crackhead on the street,
didn't you know, see if he could sell something to
get another Yeah was it nineties?

Speaker 1 (36:54):
Yeah? Crack yeah, yeah, crack crack. That's that was big
in the nineties. It's still big now, unfortunately it is.
And other stuff. Yeah, yeah, like that wholes like this.
So yes, he got the wrong guy. But then they
had a new customer and he also wanted a military guy,

(37:17):
and it was just weird to me. He's like, I'll
get the guy you want because it cut off like
his ear lobe. Yeah, and uh He's like, I'll get
the guy you want him. So sor I'm so sorry,
but it was what did Lance say when he left, Like.

Speaker 2 (37:33):
All right about don't even come backer, I'm going to
cut a steak right time, or something like Victor.

Speaker 1 (37:39):
I think Vic was the second haunchos like the guy
under the boss guy, the then boss guy. I don't
know what he I was like, did he meant like
his ass like I don't know, yeah, because I'm gonna
make some tacos later his shoulder like I wait, understand,
I guess he just meant more invasive I don't know,

(38:00):
but yeah, I just really yeah, we're gonna cut a
bigger chunk off next time.

Speaker 2 (38:04):
Bro.

Speaker 1 (38:04):
It's a weird statement to me, right, yeah, he could
be like next time, you're dead right, No, next time
we're going to cut a steak out. Okay, there's a
lot of hungry guys out there. Yeah. Yeah, so this time,
but it was weird because they get this new guy,
this new piece of shit that wants to kill human

(38:25):
and they made a point of saying that he wants
the black veteran or whatever, like they said black multiple times.
I'm like, oh, we really in the age we need
to label people like that. It was I mean that
was a nineties so yeah, but it was just funny
how they're like, yeah, he picked a black guy, Like
it just seemed like they made it racial. I get it.

(38:45):
I get it because they want you to know that
they picked the character you're introduced to that's a good guy.

Speaker 2 (38:51):
Also friends chance.

Speaker 1 (38:53):
This is so weird, like he wants the black guy
whoa time out? Right? Yeah? But yeah, so then you
get I wanted to call him Earl, but I don't
think that's his name. It was Rope. His thing said
Roper yeah, but.

Speaker 2 (39:11):
Even the Batlance, it's like, yeah, it's probably the last
hunt in New Orleans, right, because he's got a chance
messing around, which is getting involved the cops eventually. Right,
and again I assume that New Orleans was a sweet
deal because the cops are on strike and also they

(39:31):
made the cops seem not really good at what they do,
right well whenever, like he had then the Yeah, the
corner of the doctor was on the take, right, so
he had that's that was why you go like, oh, yeah,
this guy's burning a fire and that's the cause of
death because he had a corner on the take.

Speaker 1 (39:49):
Who would just be cause of death as smoking elation
or would you make it make it look like it
wasn't anything related to being shot.

Speaker 2 (39:56):
Chance found the second dog dagh and the watchman came
and beat the ship out of him. Like maybe Lance
should have been like, send him a message and if
he finds anything in the ash pit, take it, take it. No,
they beat him up, but he still had the evidence.

Speaker 1 (40:12):
My favorite was there, which then the the one cop
we'll call her birthday girl. I can't remember her name,
but she really wanted that birthday cake.

Speaker 2 (40:22):
Oh it sucks too because since she was one of
the only few cops on duty, right, she died. She died,
but he has the shows like clearly like he was murdered.
And that's when she tells the cornerwight man, I need
you to do some more, you know, chicking another autopsy,
and he's like, oh, Lance, And I.

Speaker 1 (40:42):
Feel like that, but I feel like that was like
a day ago. He's in the ground or whatever, cremated
like a homeless guy.

Speaker 2 (40:49):
I think he's still was he still like on the
autopsy table?

Speaker 1 (40:52):
Oh? Maybe it's a movie, right, so yeah, maybe that was.

Speaker 2 (40:55):
So she comes in like, do another dead body still
sitting there corners having a sandwich?

Speaker 1 (41:01):
Like what straight out of Gone in sixty seconds? Just
put the sandwich down on the dead guy. Yeah. Yeah,
it was a lot of fun stretching going on with
storylines and everything. But yeah, it was. It was great.
It's very entertaining. But it.

Speaker 2 (41:23):
Does lead to well, Okay, does the cop get shot
before Roper? I think so, because they're showing up to
get the fat dude because they need to question him after.

Speaker 1 (41:36):
Was it after because Roper was after? Was he? Yeah?
Because I thought that was the whole like the reason
they were because they everything was no, because the guy
got their their client got shot. Everything, everything was going
gone south. Everything was going south. So I think they
were just tidying up their loose ends and that's how
the fat pornographer knew he needed to get out of town.

Speaker 2 (41:59):
They kill him, all right, all right, Oh no, he
kills the doctor.

Speaker 1 (42:04):
Oka before.

Speaker 2 (42:05):
Okay, anyway, yep, no, you're right, they kill Roper before
they kill Poe.

Speaker 1 (42:13):
But yeah, so yeah, you're right that one.

Speaker 2 (42:14):
Guy picked uh Roper because he's a veteran, maybe because
he was what we don't know.

Speaker 1 (42:21):
Right, I mean, it was in my head I went like, oh,
this old white of course he wanted to kill the black, right,
just just add that element to the freaking Yeah.

Speaker 2 (42:32):
So they give Roper the entire premise like, hey, here's
the money belt, we turn grand it's all yours, skymakers
to the river.

Speaker 1 (42:41):
Yeah, but I mean I love that day, Like in
this fight, the last one you caught the tail end
and this one you're getting the middle of the Yeah.
And I feel like that was kind of the premise
of like, hey, we need to create a situation where
this their shit goes, you know, tits up where oh, crap.
In the middle of the it goes bad and so roper.

(43:02):
They're in the middle of a masley like cemetery, mousley
and whatever type thing and in the middle of you
said tits.

Speaker 3 (43:08):
Oh yeah, there's a line of It was early on
when he the guys that tried to rob Nat and
the burn and the guys like take your take your yeah,
take your tits and head north.

Speaker 1 (43:19):
No, he says, you need to get out of town
and tell that chick or whatever to point her tits north.
It was one of my favorite lines. So weird, so's
I've never heard before. Even the actor like just getting
it out of his mouth. Yeah, it was just such clunky,
cringey dialogue. But her tits north and get there. But

(43:39):
it did make me laugh. It was there's I just
started cracking like that was that was a mouthful? No
pun intended, it was, yeah, because she didn't have a mouthful,
but yeah, it was. It was such a good not
good line, but it's a stupid fun line like tell
her to points north and get lines like that is

(43:59):
what I'm like.

Speaker 2 (44:01):
You guys didn't need them, Like you have a pretty
interesting action movie going on. These one liners should be
for a cheesier, right maybe with Arnold. Oh yeah a guy, yeah,
like Roper comes out of them, like he hides himself
inside of one of the like cemetery vaults or whatever.

Speaker 1 (44:23):
Yeah, And after he sho it was it did feel
like they're like you got five minutes, right, Oh yeah,
you got fun. We're fucking lying. We're right behind you
with these two douchebags on motorcycle going beside you the
entire time, Like, I mean, they're gonna radio us where
you're at. Like it was such a ship.

Speaker 2 (44:41):
But he did get into the cemetery of there at
New Orleans. Yeah, but Roper he did get. He did
get the guy that paid him.

Speaker 1 (44:52):
That was one of the things where it was so
funny where I feel like it would even for some
piece of ship that wanted to pay to kill a
human would get to a point where it's like it
was a clean shot. That's one thing. But oh first
he got some shots on him, hit him, wounded him,
and he hears the cries of a dying man. He's like,
all right, finish him, you know, lances in there like
all right, go finish him. He's like I think I'm good.

(45:16):
I'm good. Right, you're just this fucking piece of ship
was like lining him up as he was getting ready
to leave, Like he looked like he had like the
craziest machine, some weird weapon. Yeah, but he wouldn't finish him.
And then that into his demise where he let Roper
get a minute on him, where they're searching through this
cemetery and he pops out, attacks him, grabs his gun

(45:39):
because this guy was just the you know, flabby old
white man, and Roper was he had no business. Yeah,
he was gun, he was homeless, he was military guy. Yeah,
and grabbed the gun and just.

Speaker 2 (45:54):
Is he's being chased by a lot of guys, but
he kind of empties the machine gun. In that guy,
I can see a little anger and revenge, maybe save
a couple of shots because there's still a ship ton
of people trying to shoot you.

Speaker 1 (46:06):
I felt for some reason, I was like there wasn't
a lot Like the way the magazine looked on that
machine gun looked like there was so many more bullets
left true, And maybe they were like, we don't need
that many. We're gonna he'll get a few shots. He's
got him. But yeah, it just seemed like it had
like a big magazine, and he like he maybe shot
what five to five to twenty at Roper at the beginning,

(46:29):
and then he put probably like five to ten in
this guy, and then he maybe shot five to ten
more and it was all of a sudden out like,
I get that's a lot of bullets, but also I.

Speaker 2 (46:38):
Was really hoping Roper could take a few more out right, Yeah,
but I mean overwhelmed, right, there was like again, it's
one of those it's like it's like a well, it's
just like a fox Hunt twenty what do they use
beagles something like that, something a whole pack of dogs
in one wolf. Of course the wolf the odds are

(47:01):
against him, right, and that's exactly what they're doing here.
So it was great that the Fox right you you
go one down?

Speaker 1 (47:09):
They did that because you wanted to see that guy die.
Oh yeah guys, and yeah, I mean you want to
see all of them die. But it was nice to
get like you're half the three courters way through the
movie and you got and and the good guy's gonna win,
like you know that. You know Roper's gonna die. We
all know he's gonna die, but he got one. Yeah,
because really, at this point.

Speaker 2 (47:26):
The bad guys, they just seem like they're untouchable, right,
like they're doing every hell they want it right.

Speaker 1 (47:31):
They have this guy bought off, they have that guy
bought off, they have this network that's been established, and
this is their last one. Then they're going to go.
So but you can see like, hey, there's ship's crumbling.
Their ready to fucking jet to fight in your business
somewhere else. This is the last time it's you know,
you're getting that beginning cracks of the of the the
thing crumbling. You know. Now I'm assuming because like they're

(47:51):
trying to make it out that roper, because he's homeless,
Nobody wants to help him. Roper manages to get out
of the cemetery and on the streets only it looked
like it was probably Bourbon Street.

Speaker 2 (48:04):
It was like people drinking, not a lot of people.
That was again there's no cops.

Speaker 1 (48:08):
One of those scenes I had a lot of problems with,
and nobody is helping him. The one guy.

Speaker 2 (48:13):
What did one guy say here, I haven't I don't
have any chance. No, no, no, Because this was also
so Sam Raimi. I don't know if you're familiar with
who that was. Sam Ramy people did Evil did too.
He directed those and he always puts his brother and stuff.
Ted Ramy he's the one. He was the one on
the street. Let me see if I can find the
quote here. Somebody quotes about backflipping, not quotes notes.

Speaker 1 (48:37):
But no, he definitely gets on a very crowded street like.

Speaker 2 (48:41):
Yeah, but he's like basically like asking people for help,
and ted Ramy he's like, hey, man, I ain't got
no money, man, yeah, and like and then shortly after that,
like the bad guys just shoot Roper and like two
uh uh people like just drink beer. I couldn't understand

(49:02):
that whole scene because he's asking all these people for
help and they're basically treating like a homeless guy and
like fuck off, fuck off.

Speaker 1 (49:08):
And so he realizes like I cannot run these guys.
I'm in the middle of public and just stands there
and basically not physically but gives them the finger like
come and take me, and so like I don't know
how many guys just open fire, but all these people
there's like ten to twenty people in the background because
the busy street, they just open a fire. He gets

(49:31):
lit up and all these people duck two two guys
on each side that got hit. It seemed like there
was at least ten people behind him and they all
like duck, like, oh god, and they go down. But
it was like, I don't couldn't understand if they all
got shot or but because no one got up and
ran after the firing ended, right, he was really weird.

(49:52):
The bad guys walk over to him, and I don't
know about the nineties, but everything I know about Bourbon
Street was this packed, right, but these people like stayed
duck down after the bat like for minutes, like the
bad guys came over looked at him, and ever I
was like, so I assumed he's like, oh these guys,
everybody like they just ended. But the next one there
like freak, I'm not getting up right. Well, but the

(50:14):
next scene is they're taking Roper's body away, but but
no other bodies, Like it's not like it's all this
big massacre that we need to get on top of.
It's like, oh this one black yeah, And again I
guess it's because there's no cops so we can just
get away with whatever we want to do. So I
don't know if the all the people that were around

(50:37):
it were either dead or just playing possum. Yeah, Like
it was weird, Like it just seemed like it should
be in a bigger crime scene. Yeah, because I guarantee
you all those bullets that were flying when they shot
Roper didn't hit him. There was a lot of bullets flying.

Speaker 2 (50:54):
And you're right then when uh, the the one cop
got murder, it was after the scene because they went, yeah,
they were looking for them.

Speaker 1 (51:03):
They were looking for the.

Speaker 2 (51:04):
Porn guy, which the Mummy got to first.

Speaker 1 (51:07):
Yeah, and then time like blowing his head off with
a shotgun point blank. There was way too much of
his head left for a shock true whatever, because they
showed it like him like there with like blood on
the windshow and I was like, oh no, like half
of his had gone there. There's two way too much
brutal scene.

Speaker 2 (51:28):
Yeah, they come they come rolling in like literally almost
right after he just killed that dude and right into
a gunfight.

Speaker 1 (51:39):
Right, which in my head, I like, they kill him,
their lead's gone now they're living with the cold case.
But no, no, they hung around and they were like,
we need to the circle back. They could have just
split right circle back to like.

Speaker 2 (51:52):
I know they probably wanted to get chance of course,
but the only one, like with the cop it was murdered. Yeah,
well Chance took her gun. It was like, I thought
that was that.

Speaker 1 (52:06):
Was weirdly a weird death because she caught some strays
from a shotgun. Most of it hit the door of
the cop car, so I'm not saying you can't die
from it. But then she also caught one in the
shoulder later, and I guess they were saying that one
was the fatal one, but it made her look like
it was in the shoulder, and I was like, if
I know anything about movies, because you can take one
on the shoulder pretty much every movie.

Speaker 2 (52:27):
Well the Mummy took one in the shoulder, right, and
it was like fine, that's it didn't slow them down
at all, Like almost every action movie with guns, like
The Hero takes one in the shoulder because they make
it look like it isn't a big deal. It sucks too,
because she finally was like, okay, man, I believe you,
I'm helping I believe you, and I'm dead. Yeah, and
then boom, oh you've been better off eating your birthday cake.

Speaker 1 (52:51):
You should have fucking digging the day out. Oh maybe
that doesn't.

Speaker 2 (52:53):
Metaphor that candle burned down before she can make a wish.

Speaker 1 (52:58):
It sealed her fate. I wish I was alive. I
don't know, we made that ship up, definitely what John
w No's like what he meant?

Speaker 2 (53:10):
Yeah, there's no birds, so you know it wasn't a metaphor.
When she went she pulled that drawer open to reveal
to get her cake back, and a bird flew out
that metaphor that.

Speaker 1 (53:19):
Had been hilarious a crow fuck. Yeah. But yeah, then
it's just then ship just off the wall, crazy, oh
just insanity, Like I mean, I was like, I'm following
this movie. This is actually is a solid decent movie.

(53:42):
Everything else, and then just off the rails, are like, hey,
all the stops we pulled them. There's there's nothing left
that we're not going to do. It's all going to
be hilarious realism gone forget about it. First they have
a snake, so there're so the bean chased through the bayou.
Yeah that and uh oh wait, no, I'm sorry, I

(54:02):
forgot about the motorcycle scene. Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (54:05):
All right, so after he like he the cop gets shot,
he grabs her gun. He's shooting.

Speaker 1 (54:12):
He jumps out from behind one car again. These motorcycle
guys won't leave him alone. Some sweet diving shooting scenes.
But he he uh he face kicks a guy right
in the helmet. I was like, do you know how
bad that would hurt him? Like he would have been
spun around. Like I don't care how hard your kick is.
If the dude's on a motorcycle going like fifty and

(54:33):
you hit him in the head of your foot, you're
getting spun the fuck right. You're getting fucked up. Knocks
the guy off the bike. That guy would die, but
you will.

Speaker 2 (54:40):
But he gets the bike, that gets on the back
and they they ride away. They're trying to get away
and then all of a sudden they're being chased. But
they get to a road closed and then his gas
tank hash he got leak gas tank. I'm like, wait,
leaking gas tank. There's a road close my and I
forgot to me. It was like, is he gonna fucking speed this?

(55:02):
And like ramp over the uh yo, the incomplete bridge.

Speaker 1 (55:07):
You know a movie. I took it back to Harley
Davidson into Marble Shit where Big John Studd has the
has the motorcycle and he opens the gas cap and
he drives it towards the bad guys and like pulls
the cap off and then like has the gas leaking
and then shoots it clows it all up. I was like,
is he going to fucking Big John stud shit? Hell, yeah,
let's go. But he does it? Nope, nope, nope. Even

(55:29):
more ridiculous. What were they in like an old suburban
or something like the bad guys? Yeah, like they were
in like a full body Oh he like he goes
speeding after it, standing on the seat while shooting the
gun at them. Yeah, he jumps on this. Now again,
I had a motorcycle.

Speaker 2 (55:49):
I'm not sure how the motorcycle was going kept going
right because he wasn't holding either handle. He jumped up
on the seat. He was not he did not have
his hand on the throttle and gravity man right towards it.
And this is like many of flipping with that mullet

(56:10):
just waving in the air. That was the one thing
when you see this, when you see it's a stunt guy.
Oh man, oh my, it's the mullet.

Speaker 1 (56:18):
So it's so not like it's naughty. Yeah. That was
the one time I was like, I definitely knew it
was a stunt man, because whether it was, and in
my head, I went, please let that be the stunt
guy's your actual hair, because it was so much longer
if it was. He's like, I'm not fuckingting my hair
for this. Yeah, I'm not cutting my hair. You're gonna
see my goddamn hair. It's amazing, and I'm going to
flip over this goddamn car. It was. It was so

(56:41):
good and so much darker, like, it was great. I
actually appreciated it, the fact that I was like, I
could tell that was a stunt man and it was
so good.

Speaker 2 (56:49):
I mean, it's a fun scene. But yeah, I mean
obviously he would be dead too.

Speaker 1 (56:54):
Oh yeah. His motorcycle plows in the front of like
an old like full size excursion, explores some thing, and
he just does a flip or I was expecting him
almost to land on his feet, but he doesn't. Surprisingly,
but he flips over top of it and then does
another flip like I'm kind of off the back of
it like a man. Chance, so good flip. He's a
chance slipping motherfucker. He's as soon he's taking a chance

(57:16):
on how many flips I can do over fire over cars.
If you'd have told me the over under on flips
on this movie would have been five, and I'd taken
the under and I lost my money.

Speaker 2 (57:25):
Would have lost your money because he does.

Speaker 1 (57:28):
At least like three more in the like the final
scene of the showdown, he might still be doing I
don't know, right all the way through the end credits.

Speaker 2 (57:36):
Maybe just flipping the motherfucker. Yeah, that scene was ridiculous.

Speaker 1 (57:43):
Then they go to see his uncle apparently, who's like,
you know what, I haven't seen you in years long enough,
your shotguns covered in five inches of dust, But you
know what, I'll blow up my house for you. That's
what I'm okay, all right.

Speaker 2 (57:56):
I didn't understand that he does like before they got there,
that we have to talk about that fucking snake.

Speaker 1 (58:02):
Oh god, oh yeah, snake. So they get they get
into the they get into the bayou, and there's like
that that's going like, isn't there a trail or something
we could take?

Speaker 2 (58:13):
I'm like, you're you're standing on a massive trail. Everything's open.

Speaker 1 (58:17):
I was watching them with we both went like, what's this.
What's this bitch looking for? Like you're in the most
wide open forest on a trail, asking for a trail
like you're in a park. I don't know.

Speaker 2 (58:31):
But they stop and he's like, do you trust me?

Speaker 1 (58:35):
And why they had to set this up with hilarious
but right, well what do you mean? Because she was like,
are you going to stick trust me? Yeah? I mean,
then close your eyes? Why do you?

Speaker 2 (58:45):
Why do I need to close my eyes to trust you?
But when she finally does close her eyes, she almost
just puckering up. She was like, you know what he's
gonna God that hair.

Speaker 1 (58:54):
I have just so gonna act. I'm in gonna let
me suck the hair. Yeah, I mean she had to
look again.

Speaker 2 (59:01):
Every Fandamn just needs to know somebody for like two days,
and they're like, yeah, I'm man, I'll get in bed
with him. That's the VANDAMN. It's the VANDAMN curse. I'm
just trying to make friends, but they all just want to.

Speaker 1 (59:15):
Be sorry, I cannot know you for more than two days. Man,
you would never in a million years predict what just
happens in the movie, because the movie to this point,
I thought they were taking it a little serious, right,
It was like there was yeah, I mean it's stretched
as an action movie does. Yeah, but still like in

(59:35):
the same troll. So she closes her eyes. She's kind
of like tilting her head. She thinks she that he's
gonna kiss her, definitely, and all of a sudden, snake
kind of a lurches out of the tree towards her.

Speaker 2 (59:50):
He grabs it. Okay, that would be kind of be fine.
I've seen that a couple of movies Indiana Jones, I'm
pretty sure in the second one there's a scene like that.
He grabs a snake and he he punches it in
the face.

Speaker 1 (01:00:03):
I love the first he like slaps it and just
pisses it off, and then he like karate chops it
and knocks it out. He knocks out I probably the
snake is totally concussed, right, I say that snake doesn't
even know his relatives anymore. And she's like, uh, oh,
did you did you kill it? Or he was like no, no,

(01:00:28):
And then he proceeds to bite the snake, the rattle
off the snake with his mouth. What does he need
to bite it off?

Speaker 2 (01:00:39):
Well, he had one hand on the around the snake
snack well, but also he just knocked it out.

Speaker 1 (01:00:45):
It's unconscious. We're not kidding.

Speaker 2 (01:00:46):
If you haven't seen the movie, it's he punches a
snake out.

Speaker 1 (01:00:49):
So good. It's so good when he punches a snake unconscious.
KAO for all this victory.

Speaker 2 (01:00:59):
And then yeah, he bites the route because.

Speaker 1 (01:01:03):
He's a warning, you know, and basically he's gonna use
it as a trap.

Speaker 2 (01:01:08):
Again, the trap is beyond my comprehension how he set
this trap up and how the snake was so fucking
pissed off. Right, well here's here's but he's gonna use
it as a trap and it works like a charm
yep killed it. Yeah, I mean when I guess when
the snake came to well, that was like fucking biting
the first person, I say, a biting.

Speaker 1 (01:01:28):
So the bad guys walked through and he sets up
a trip bar somehow to the like the snake's tail
or something where pulls it down and put a branch
and he but in my head, I went that snake
hadn't moved apparently since he said.

Speaker 2 (01:01:44):
Would the snake be bleeding out? But I was like, yeah,
where he just ripped his fucking right.

Speaker 1 (01:01:48):
Why did he need to bite the rattles off the
snake if the snake was unconscious until they fucking hit
the trip bar, Like you just killed that snake. I
mean that snakes right? How often?

Speaker 2 (01:01:57):
How often are rattlesnakes.

Speaker 1 (01:01:58):
And trees f y A, I don't yeah, rattle information.
I'm for my information.

Speaker 2 (01:02:04):
Uh, because that rattlesnake was coming out of tree at
her right, you know, okay in a movie and Nana Conda. Yeah,
I don't think they go up in the trees the rattle. Hey,
if you know, do rattlesnakes climb trees and just chill?

Speaker 1 (01:02:14):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (01:02:15):
I thought they like to snug up in the sun
on the ground something at gmail dot com let me know.

Speaker 1 (01:02:21):
Yeah, because now you say that, yeah, like there's plenty
of poisoned snakes and like the Amazon everything that are
in trees. I would I never heard of I was.

Speaker 2 (01:02:30):
A rattlesnake chilling in the tree.

Speaker 1 (01:02:33):
You mentioned it. I never But.

Speaker 2 (01:02:34):
When the one guy does trip the trap, that snake
fuck calms down angry?

Speaker 1 (01:02:38):
I mean I would be. You wake me up after
my tail, guart, I don't have a chail one. I
got punched and my tail got ripped off.

Speaker 2 (01:02:46):
What if snake tails like this, dick? Because it was
a pretty big rattle. Now he's like, fuck it the fuck?

Speaker 1 (01:02:52):
Now?

Speaker 2 (01:02:52):
How am I supposed impress the ladies.

Speaker 1 (01:02:55):
I ain't gonna get fucking ship after this. I hate
you and all of your species right coming after you.
It's gotta be equitable to like someone ripping your dick off.
I mean, I mean, I'm not yeah, I mean, if
you're a snake, I imagine. I mean, I think their their
rattle gets bigger with age, but I think it's slow.
Wait human, we don't not quite. I've been holding out

(01:03:17):
these last few years and I don't think it's true.
Damn it. Yeah, like yeah, like that that that whole scenario,
it was fucking It was a great scene, but it
almost was like a different movie. Oh yeah, it's just
like you could literally have put like in hot shots. Yeah, yeah,

(01:03:40):
it was. It really just went like a little bit like, hey,
this movie was like, it's a nineties action movie. It's
not slapstick ridiculous. And we just.

Speaker 2 (01:03:49):
Again after that point, yet he just went to grab
snake and killed it. No, he he had the he
had the right touch with that punch. He didn't use
the dim mock because that would have kill him in
the dim I you know, bluff you have punched in
his head and.

Speaker 1 (01:04:03):
He probably would have ball off. Yeah, then he would have.

Speaker 2 (01:04:07):
To snake had the biggest fangs too.

Speaker 1 (01:04:11):
Oh yeah, it was huge.

Speaker 2 (01:04:11):
Just like I'm like, are you sure that's a rattlesnake?

Speaker 1 (01:04:14):
C GI artist? Are you sure? I don't know that's
for a big snake. That's a big snake. Yes, fucking great.

Speaker 2 (01:04:22):
She barely flinched, to be honest, she almost got a bit.
But really it was really angry fucking snake. From what
I heard though, rattlesnakes, I don't want to fuck with you.
I don't know that's the point that rattles like. Just
don't funk with that.

Speaker 1 (01:04:35):
I've got to rattle. Just walk around. Yeah, we're good.
This was like, like, I'm fucking angry. It's like fifteen
people walked in through here and no one's acting. I
saw my fucking job about not killing anybody. God damn it.
The next person comes around that corner next to bitch

(01:04:57):
that walks next to this tree looking for a kiss.
I worn.

Speaker 2 (01:05:02):
Oh, then he has to go home to his wife.
Oh where's your rattle?

Speaker 1 (01:05:07):
What happened? You're real quiet coming home. I don't want
to talk about it.

Speaker 2 (01:05:11):
I need to, like the I need what happened to
the snake, like, what if his life, what if he's
like in therapy? Like, yeah, man, fucking Chase, uh, you know,
fucking mediocre action star. Keep having nightmares about this guy
putting my rattle in his mouth and then bite it off.
I don't even want to grow rattle anymore.

Speaker 1 (01:05:30):
Man. I used to like rattling. It's my favorite pastime.
It's like a stay away from me. I don't even
doing him. But now they call me quiet, help me,
sleepy snake. I don't even like it. I hate him.
I used to have friends, used to have the hottest
girl hashtag snake movie. Do you want us to make

(01:05:53):
that movie? Not on a plane?

Speaker 2 (01:05:57):
Nah, we won't do that. We digress.

Speaker 1 (01:06:03):
Yeah, but yeah, like after that, like then they get
like I so the they meet like, let's I kind
of want to gloss over in a span of time
because they meet his uncle, who's Wolford Brimley talking and
it's seriously bad accent, like he's nope, not today, bitches. Yeah,
they meet Wolford Brimley who's been pimp and diabetes for

(01:06:25):
the last decade. But he's he's he's out there with
making moonshine or whiskey, moonshine. Yep, he's got a big
old still a nice little cabin. Chance brings his just
an off the grid motherfucker. Yeah, and then but Chance
rolls in and fucks up to everything. Oh I I was.

(01:06:46):
I laughed because, oh that snakes get had me crying.
I laughed because the minute they get to his uncles,
I'm like, this motherfucker's just out here living off the grid.
We know this is all going to go.

Speaker 2 (01:06:59):
To s Yeah, he looked like he was living his
best life. Now oh yeah, uh, but the chance shows up.
You come to see your uncle, they have a whole
Yeah he has like, yeah, it was a chance. Are
you what the.

Speaker 1 (01:07:17):
Right? Wait? I got like, but what's what the birds? Is? He? Like?
Is he is? He not a revenueer? Okay, he's not
here for my illegal Still he's gonna come the U.

Speaker 2 (01:07:28):
But they go in the cabin and he's like, you
got that thirty odd six I gave you, like for
Christmas or something.

Speaker 1 (01:07:35):
He's like, no, a gatoradeed.

Speaker 2 (01:07:37):
I'm like, oh okay, interesting, I'd like to see that
movie too.

Speaker 1 (01:07:44):
We're a gatorade of thirty.

Speaker 2 (01:07:46):
He's like, but still, I still have your shotgun, which
seems to be like this moment.

Speaker 1 (01:07:49):
Now, I was so irritated by this moment, and he
grabs a shot and we get a little bit of
slow mom we got a chance, goes into.

Speaker 2 (01:07:57):
Deep So I'm like, what the fuck did you do
with the shot run? What did I need a flashback
to see what you did with a shotgun? Why is
this a big moment?

Speaker 1 (01:08:05):
He pulled it out of the rafters of a cabin
with about three inches of dust on it. I was like, oh, cool,
I took really good care of it for you. What
the fuck you just threw it?

Speaker 2 (01:08:15):
It didn't matter. Somewhere in the storyline. A minute later
that thing is shiny. Oh yeah, that does got cleaned up.

Speaker 1 (01:08:21):
I mean the gun looked like, even with dusty, looked
like a cool, cool gun. Yeah. But at the same time,
also like, yeah, I just maybe cleaned the barrel out
a little bit, like take care of it. The fuck? Uncle,
What the fuck? Why did you Why did you.

Speaker 2 (01:08:34):
Hear the moon shiner you might want to keep a
couple of guns clean ready to go around.

Speaker 1 (01:08:39):
Why did you feel the need to hide it? I
don't like, I just didn't understand the hole. Yeah, was
there a cut. See did he make this is the one?
Did you remember you murdered people with? Did you make
him sleep between the floors? Is that why the gun
is there? Were you actually the shittiest dunkle of all time?

Speaker 2 (01:08:57):
That makes no sense? Yeah? Yeah, anybody slow man blowing
a little dust man. There has to be a scene
that was deleted. Why this gun is so important?

Speaker 1 (01:09:07):
I would love to have seen that.

Speaker 2 (01:09:09):
The gun definitely doesn't have a limitter or whatever, like
I had a shotgun, or you only put three shells
one chamber, so four total this one could hold.

Speaker 1 (01:09:18):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:09:19):
You got a box of twenty, yeah, you can fit
it all in. I got another box of twenty.

Speaker 1 (01:09:23):
I think it can fit.

Speaker 2 (01:09:23):
It's like this thing he's loaded.

Speaker 1 (01:09:26):
He shot about fifty to sixty shots from that gun
in the movie and loaded at one time.

Speaker 2 (01:09:33):
But they they devise a plan. He's gonna lead them
away again. He takes his his uncle's horse. Fortunately, hey
his uncle. It turns out he has three, which works
out because there's three of them. It's like, why would
does a guy make a moonshine have three horses?

Speaker 1 (01:09:53):
But here we are.

Speaker 2 (01:09:55):
But the bad guys do find this location.

Speaker 1 (01:09:59):
Because they're all so excellent trackers. Yeah somehow, Yeah, what
the fuck? Well, the one guy is like he getting down,
he's just feeling like a footprint. Oh yeah, it's like
you are you like an X men? Do you get
like do you have flashbacks of what happened in the past. Yeah.
It was pretty annoying. How good the trackers they were, like,

(01:10:19):
I get if you're following horse tracks or something, but
like you're just following random buyo shit like Chance. Well again,
like it really works because Lance are like, no, we're
going after that guy anyway.

Speaker 2 (01:10:33):
So they were really gonna go after Chance. But the
uncle decides he's gonna launch an arrow and blow up
is still. But they were all actually gonna leave.

Speaker 1 (01:10:44):
Oh yeah yeah, He's like, no, I'm gonna kill like
maybe two people and blow up my entire house. Here's
what I understanding.

Speaker 2 (01:10:51):
I could see like getting the getting a little uh
one up on him, launched that still. Oh when he
shot the one Arrowlan's Henderson like almost like he had
like a success again, like what who are these guys?

Speaker 1 (01:11:04):
Right? I love that. I love that they kind of
made through the entire movie, even almost in that beginning
scene with the with her dad. There's an error coming,
and they made it. They made like what three cut
scenes as the air was coming, almost like everybody should
know when errors are coming, like everybody should know when
aerrs coming. And definitely the bad guys sixth cents definitely

(01:11:26):
knew when they were like being shot. Blows is still up, Uh,
people are on fire. I love the dude that was
like I forget what they call the machines with like
the unnecessary steps. But that was one of those where
he shot. He shot a jar of like clear like
the still distil it that was flammable, and that set

(01:11:47):
fire to like all the open flame that he had
for the distill and that set that and then that
set up fused to like I don't know about one
hundred pounds of dinads.

Speaker 2 (01:11:55):
So he's out here, he's got this nice little cabin
leaving on the grid so I could see one thing
blown up the still and trying to take a couple
of bad guys out. So they you know, given your
your nephew a chance. And because like Lance said like no,
you know, he was like we're going after chances the.

Speaker 1 (01:12:15):
Goal, right, We're not worried about Uh.

Speaker 2 (01:12:18):
Well for Brimley and Natasha could have just rolled off
and not have blown up his cabin, and then he
could have came back later once chance was all done with,
you know, fucking people up, and still had a place
to live. So I didn't understand, like, man, you didn't
need to blow up that time the cabin. You got
some shitting there you didn't want people to find because
guess what, we're worried the cops come poking around after this.

Speaker 1 (01:12:41):
Because guess what. Blowing up his cabin killed no one, No.

Speaker 2 (01:12:45):
It didn't take a single person. Like he literally, I
bet there's a backstory. He's like, nah, but it's some
evidence in there. He's like, this is my So when
the cops come poking around all the you know what happened.

Speaker 1 (01:12:55):
It's like I have a wife at another cabin, I
suldly go to. This is just my like moon shining cabin.
So yeah, maybe it's so it was. And he's like,
I don't actually live here, it's more of a hide out.
I don't even actually have an accent. I only turned
the accent. I want to come out here like I'm
from Maine and diabetes Jersey movie cocoon. That's really me.

Speaker 2 (01:13:20):
I just really like being being I just played chase
his uncle illegal ship.

Speaker 1 (01:13:24):
It's so much fun. Yeah, but they do chase Chance
and then then again you're right, but all laws of
reality are also gone because all of a sudden, now
guns uh that they're shooting at him, they explode on impact.
Oh they got grenade launchers, they got all the ship,
but they're not even some of the guns weren't grenade launches.

(01:13:45):
They were just still shooting. It would hit the ground,
sparks would fly. Oh like what, okay, you hit it?
Why you hit a tree? Why did sparks fly? Here's
your you're you're you're wearing a weird using weird gun
and it's a very poor aim. You were very not
but it escalates. They get in the abandoned warehouse. Man,
Now every five anytime you shoot a gun, shit explodes.

(01:14:06):
So so they get to that final scene in that
weird warehouse, and in my head, I went, he chose
weird warehouse because he's like all abandoned, like this warehouse,
like this factory hasn't been used in like twenty years.
Everything's rusted, old holes and roof. Only because he's like
birds in his motherfucker. Right.

Speaker 2 (01:14:24):
Yeah, well so like it just looks cool, right, but yeah,
the final the final showdown, Yeah, in an abandoned warehouse
that turns out has old Marty girls my gun so fuck,
which gave like a weird aesthetic to the ending. Yeah,
but it did give us a great scene again that

(01:14:45):
I do think. It was one of the things that
stuck out. We laughed, You're like why.

Speaker 1 (01:14:48):
Yeah, but yeah, yeah, like the uh But what I
liked about the whole thing was so this last like
party to go round up this back this guy was
consistent of former clients, not all of that, but like yeah,
which was a nice thing you wanted to see because like, oh,
all these guys have killed a person so and there

(01:15:12):
were pieces like they were just so you know, like
they actually did way better than your thought they would because.

Speaker 2 (01:15:17):
This time he went from five hundred thousand, it was
seven hundred and fifty thousand, right, and the person that
killed him is.

Speaker 1 (01:15:23):
Free is free, but I'll cover your your your cost
or whatever. But it was one of those where it
was like a fe're those guys like you have to wonder, like, one,
why am I paying more to end up with a
party who seems kind of dangerous. Yeah, but also he
has twenty other guys with me and these five other douchebags. Yeah,

(01:15:44):
but yeah, it was hilarious how you're like, oh this
this was Lance at one point, like just why we
do this right? This is what you wanted, right.

Speaker 2 (01:15:53):
But also like I'm like, well, compared to everything else
you guys did, Like you know, you guys are like,
oh this guy might on that once that first guy
that paid seven to fifty to go hunt, this final
guy like died.

Speaker 1 (01:16:07):
I'd been like I think I'm good, Like I'm like
I you have like twenty other guys. If I just
walk away, I think it'll be fine. It's kind of
like every every person before these guys was like just
not a you know, not good fighter, like in Rocky
where they were they were giving him easy fight, so

(01:16:27):
he thought he was good, right, and now he's actually
fighting the cham right, only to find out like, oh shit,
this is fucking Club and fucking Lane.

Speaker 2 (01:16:36):
They fucking die to day and all of them died.
Chance got all of them. So we even made a
couple of quips.

Speaker 1 (01:16:43):
Along the way because fuck those guys. But it did
seem like I because I was like, well, there's so
many of them that there needs to be a scene
where he gets like a lot of them. There wasn't.
I think maybe at one time he got like four
of them at one time, but they just we got
the one and like, sorry about your shirt.

Speaker 2 (01:17:03):
I didn't get I didn't Again, the one liners didn't land,
like he didn't need to do it. Oh no, yeah,
I didn't even Like, you know why you don't need
one liners because I have my brain's thinking too hard
on Like wait, he just shot the guy like five
or six times.

Speaker 1 (01:17:17):
And then still kicked him in the face. And that
was his move. He would shoot a guy a bunch
of times and then still do a back spinning can
in the face. The one like very Texas looking guy
he shoots like four or five times. He's because he
was smoking. He had his big cigar. Yeah, and he's
like he shot him like four or five times and
he's just standing there like, uh, like no, this guy's dead,

(01:17:38):
like he said.

Speaker 2 (01:17:38):
You notice like in the one scene where Natasha got
a gun, she shot the guy in the dick.

Speaker 1 (01:17:44):
All five times and he died from dick shots. I
would hope you Yeah, I mean, I don't think you can.
I mean I don't want to come. I mean, if
you didn't die, like what should Oh, he'd be like
di rontlesteak, Like basically, you don't have my rattler? Right?

Speaker 2 (01:17:57):
That was didn't you be hanging out of the rouse
and they drinking like you remember what you had?

Speaker 1 (01:18:01):
Remember when we had dick. It's a good time, right,
let's not die from that? Okay, sad music fade out?
Yeah it was yeah like that. Yeah, she got that.
And that was one of the first guys that attacked
Chance at the fire scene. Yeah. He was a very
he was a very creepy looking bald dude. Yeah, and
yeah she's so she.

Speaker 2 (01:18:21):
Like there was a lot of people getting shout on
the dicks.

Speaker 1 (01:18:24):
Yeah, because she saw him. I think maybe they tried
to make it like four shots in the dick and
maybe one in the chest and Wolford Burmley yelled at
her for it. Look what you did?

Speaker 2 (01:18:32):
Look, I'm like, what do I quite understand why? I
was Who is he saying no, did he not want her?
Or like no, you shouldn't.

Speaker 1 (01:18:38):
Get your hands on your hands. I mean I went
or was he saying like, don't shoot him in the dicks?
Shoot him in the vitals and let's move on. You
waste the bullets in the dick. In my head, I
wanted to believe that, but at the same time I
was also I think you're probably more like, now you see,
now you have blood. Goddamn women shooting people shouldn't be

(01:18:59):
doing that, now you have diabetes.

Speaker 2 (01:19:05):
There's a scene like this is going on, like this
ending scene's kind of long, so long, such a but
you know, yeah, oh no, before we get there, there
is one scene again where we're talking about shit exploding.
So a motorcycle guy comes in with Chance sees him,
and the guy motorcycle guy sees him, and Chance kicks

(01:19:26):
a gas can. Oh yeah, in the air, kicks it. Yeah,
go perfectly great soccer cam right at it. I think
he shoots it. Then it explodes, but it explodes like
a fucking bomb went off. It blows the motorcycle out
a window with him on it, and I'm like, okay,
I mean, I understand gas is flammable, but man, oh yeah,

(01:19:48):
not like they were amping up. Even guns at this
point now are shooting like grenade even like a forty five.

Speaker 1 (01:19:56):
Is a grenade launcher. That was that was at the
point where I went like, oh, I know what they're
saying about John Wugong overboard because every day that last,
every explosion. Well, at one point in the final fight scene,
the the lance gets shot by by chance and he

(01:20:18):
met with a shotgun and goes like what like ten
fifteen feet back? Yeah, boom, just straight in a chest
with a shotgun gets knocked back ten fifteen feet. I'm
assuming that he wore a flak jacket because he immediately
gets up and scurries away. I'm like, I don't care
if I'm wearing the most the best flack jacket. If

(01:20:39):
I get hit with something that knocks me to the
ground that hard, I'm not immediately getting up here straying
away like I'm gonna take a sick Like that's.

Speaker 2 (01:20:48):
A that's a You're definitely gonna take a second, Like whoa.

Speaker 1 (01:20:50):
Right, you got fucking phased a little bit there. You're
not going to immediately get up and scurry like I
don't care what the fight or flight is going on
in your head. You just got hit by something your
chest that knocked you ten feet back hard. This is
so weird.

Speaker 2 (01:21:05):
There's a scene like now a lot of ships now
on fire, because again the guns are blowing everything up,
but he's fighting Lance. At one point, now he's done,
like he did a lot of backflips, but he's he
comes through with like a double backflip over these.

Speaker 1 (01:21:21):
Barrels that are on fire. Through the fire.

Speaker 2 (01:21:24):
Apparently also, fire was barely an issue for these guys.
Nobody was really getting burned, just pissed off.

Speaker 1 (01:21:29):
Well, at one point Lance's coat was on fire and
he casually took it off after he raised.

Speaker 2 (01:21:35):
A little bit because sort of a bit like take
you take your off, take your.

Speaker 1 (01:21:38):
Coat off, and if you watch, like you could see
like just how much of the uh the fire jail,
fire jail he was smeared with because everything was wet
after that.

Speaker 2 (01:21:47):
Yeah, he really, I mean he was. I guess he
was in the moment. You know, He's like, I'm staying
in the moment. I'm like, man, you should get that
coat off, right, I was. I was before that ship
starts to melt into your skin.

Speaker 1 (01:21:56):
I'm super impressed with how he handled that situation. I
was like, good on you, broke.

Speaker 2 (01:22:01):
But even a scene where like Lance is trying to
hit him with a two by four of this on.

Speaker 1 (01:22:05):
Fire, Oh yeah, and he just grabs it. But yet
the camera comes up to his muscle right slow motions up.
I'm like, and his arm just like flexes like it's like,
this isn't a strake. I think I think I had
a note like, oh ship byset moment, like they just yeah,
bicet moment. They just for a moment's slow moan on
his bike. It looked great. His bicet looked awesome. It

(01:22:27):
was all like sweaty or greased up.

Speaker 2 (01:22:31):
And then boom, like an axe kick chopped the board
in half.

Speaker 1 (01:22:35):
Oh no, yeah, I laughed at that because I was like,
I don't care how strong you are. That's a third
degree burned on here. You're on fire. Noah, this fire,
this fire, that board has been burning along enough. It's cold.

Speaker 2 (01:22:47):
This fire did not hurt anybody.

Speaker 1 (01:22:50):
Yeah, immune to fire, yep. Immune chance. They rolled a
I don't roll the twenty dances, rolling twenty left right.
Every time he jumped over the barrel, he was rolling
at twenty yeah. Now uh so so Lance the bad
guy had like the shittiest gun, such a way they

(01:23:12):
made a point of making it like such a weird gun,
like a giant bullet. It was like a one shot, yeah,
a one shot like rifle shot gun. Weird, but he
was he was like trying to tried to make him
so good with it, but the end it really like
it really didn't matter, like he would I guess. We

(01:23:32):
do get a scene where he as soon as you
as soon as you knew Net was in the building, like,
of course the bad guy is gonna eat, which made
me they have like remember remember what Keanu said, you
might have to shoot us. Well what got me was uh.
At one point, Wolford Brimley and the and the love
interest are on horses and he goes go get the

(01:23:54):
cops and she sprints away on a horse. Next thing
and there outside the building, both of them, and he's
dragging her into the I'm like, why the fuck would
you drag a unarmed woman into a to protect her?
Like he was physically dragging her in. I got bow
and arrows and I'm eighty I can protect you, telling

(01:24:17):
me like a missus and missing content. Oh, it's just
so fucking weird. Why she was on the way on
a horse to call the cops and then all of
a sudden back and like it made no sense unless
she was like nope, I'm doubling back to help they
were what they really need was my help with No,
I've proven that I have the experience to help you

(01:24:37):
guys shoot one guy in a dick.

Speaker 2 (01:24:39):
No, she would have came riding in into Camaro rampant
be great, and actually wouldn't be It wouldn't phaze me
a bit because she would have blown up too. So
as she ramped through the window.

Speaker 1 (01:24:49):
That would be fun. Great if she comes through a
window with an explosion onto it, and then maybe playing
like DC or something maybe uh nineties, maybe a little
uh guns and roses, Yeah, welcome to the Jungle Highway.
Something to the fact. We're like, oh, she.

Speaker 2 (01:25:05):
Just got it right right before, like he was going
to get the drop on chance. And then she comes sliding, Yeah,
does a slide and hits him with the rear of
the car and Lance goes flying and he does a
quippie thing like hey, She's like, do you trust me?

Speaker 1 (01:25:20):
I think a car coming in, like when he's cornered
by like five guys, and she takes out the four
behind with the Camardo, So now it's one on one
and at the fucking scene we want and she's like,
you know, get this finished. Handle it, bitch, handle it.
Come on. Yeah, she's over there booking a flight. Yeah,
we're going to the Bahamas. When we're down here, you're

(01:25:42):
gonna you're gonna make my babies. Get the ship done.
There is a scene where he grabs her. He's like,
tore down the shotgun.

Speaker 2 (01:25:51):
He empties all his shelves out of the shot and
I'm like, all right, could have just you could have
just thrown it down like he told you to, just
in case you make a move and grab it.

Speaker 1 (01:25:59):
Are you setting up the worst in the movie. Well,
I'm setting that word so like insinuated, Like she reached
down close enough to touch his peepee. Oh no, before
he before she did that the best line in the movie.
Go ahead, loaded me.

Speaker 2 (01:26:15):
So he has like this belt on with these big shells.

Speaker 1 (01:26:18):
Rather than just.

Speaker 2 (01:26:19):
Pull a shell out, she reaches low to push, to
push the shell up.

Speaker 1 (01:26:23):
I'm on the bottom and he goes, oh.

Speaker 2 (01:26:26):
Oh, guys, the director, of course we know when you're insinuating.

Speaker 1 (01:26:31):
She bumped it. And he's like but at that point,
I went, oh wait, yeah, so he's his weapon doesn't
have a He's held holding an arrow to this chick's chin. Yea,
like he can go up and she can still live,
like I know those veins if he goes the right way.
But he wasn't holding it the right way. And he
just drops his weapon because he has an unloaded weapon

(01:26:52):
and an arrow to this chick's chin. Yeah, I was like, wait,
why did one? Why did you unload your shotgun? But
like load me?

Speaker 2 (01:27:00):
He just nons here, like do it right, Like maybe
he's like, you go ahead, do it. I've seen him shoot.
The fucker can't hit anything terrible.

Speaker 1 (01:27:09):
Have you seen a stupid guy bullets? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (01:27:13):
Oh, but the whole time, he had taken a hand
grenaid off the other the mummy, yep, and he's been
like doing magic ship, which that ship was like where
would go? The whole he had it, I thought you
were at one point rapt it like in sh yeah,
but then I guess he was. I had in a pocket,
he had it hidden like he was like look, ma, no,
nothing out my sleeve. But yet when it was time.

Speaker 1 (01:27:36):
Also, he's a grenade right and he man and it
was so weird. Yeah, puts it down Lance's pants, kicks him.
Oh no, yeah, kicks him so fucking hard. Oh yeah.
Across the room into a pile. Yeah, and he's and
Lance is sitting there.

Speaker 2 (01:27:54):
Wait do we no, no, no, no, we can't before we
get the ending. I wanted to talk about this.

Speaker 1 (01:27:57):
We didn't. There is another bird set and it was
all the bird scenes. This is the one bird was
on the bird.

Speaker 2 (01:28:06):
So he's sitting up there watching these guys come into
the warehouse and a pigeons on his shoulder and he
just kind of looks at the pigeon like.

Speaker 1 (01:28:13):
Doesn't he do it? Yeah, because he's because he's doing
the bird thing, and then he hits a button to
lower it. He's on the back of this this Marty
grass bird oh yeah, and just starts shooting people.

Speaker 2 (01:28:26):
And it's again a weird scene, but it's as kind of
like all right, I get it, Like the director loves
fucking birds.

Speaker 1 (01:28:33):
It was one.

Speaker 2 (01:28:33):
I mean he loves uh fucking Comma bird right, Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:28:40):
He loves putting birds in movies. Yeah, like they Yeah,
it was. It was one of those where I went
like did he go like, whoa can I put birds?
And they're like it doesn't really lend itself. Today He's
like I want like four, Like okay, you can have
won the beginning He's like, what's what, what's the other one.
He's like, I want a big one. I want the biggest,

(01:29:01):
biggest gun.

Speaker 2 (01:29:02):
He's gonna ride it down from the heavens and shoot everybody.
It was pretty fucking stupid. Also thought it made him
a sitting duck.

Speaker 1 (01:29:10):
If any of.

Speaker 2 (01:29:10):
Those people that wants to be the bad guys, and
they should have been able to take him out.

Speaker 1 (01:29:16):
They made it look like the bad guys didn't understand
that the big bird falling from the ceiling didn't have
him on it right away.

Speaker 2 (01:29:23):
Yeah, I guess it was such a big bird.

Speaker 1 (01:29:25):
Well, I mean they were old white guys, so with guns,
so they maybe not.

Speaker 2 (01:29:29):
They need to get out their biphones, like wait, wait, wait,
I thought.

Speaker 1 (01:29:33):
We were just shooting somewhere the homeless guy. But yeah,
at the end, he puts a grenade down Lance Henderson's pants.

Speaker 2 (01:29:43):
Yeah, and again this is where it gets crazy.

Speaker 1 (01:29:45):
He he uncaps it.

Speaker 2 (01:29:48):
Yeah, he like pulls it and he's like aha, and
then it sparks like it's spark arking between the I
don't I don't know if I don't think.

Speaker 1 (01:29:56):
That's how it works, if all grenades have this on them.
But he wholes like unscrews the top of the green
from the bottom and it says, fuse.

Speaker 2 (01:30:05):
Yeah, this views then since like sparks back into the grenade.

Speaker 1 (01:30:11):
Yeah, it was so weird. I told I told Rachel that.
I was like, wait, wait, wait, wait, so you're telling
me this motherfucker gets a grenade in his hand and
just just like, oh, I should throw it. He goes,
I'm gonna unscrew it, and now it's all safe. Yeah, no, thanks,
we're good here. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:30:31):
He the time it took him to unscrew it and
blow up, he could have just chucked it.

Speaker 1 (01:30:36):
Oh, yeah, it really was.

Speaker 2 (01:30:37):
Oh is the growler empty?

Speaker 1 (01:30:39):
Yeah? For beer?

Speaker 2 (01:30:42):
That means this is the end of the episode. It's okay,
we ran an hour. That's an hour after the first brig.

Speaker 1 (01:30:48):
Yeah, we we went long. All right, Well there you Uh,
Chase wins the day, gets the girl.

Speaker 2 (01:30:56):
Oh, and uncle lives. He's not glass to rebuild it
home because he blew it up. All the bad guys
are dead. Are the cops s Dolen strike.

Speaker 1 (01:31:07):
We don't know. Is Lance on her as chance going
to go out on a ship at the end of
the week and get us to it seven?

Speaker 2 (01:31:12):
But we don't know, we don't know all those everything's
what about the snake? The only thing we know how's
the snake doing. The only thing we know is that
he's gonna have sex with the she is and.

Speaker 1 (01:31:23):
She's totally Ye. What do you give it? I give
it like an eight and a half? Yeah, solid. I
mean I've been like the last part was like the
you know, the final scene was a bit ridiculous, but
it was actually like a fun nineties movie. The ending
was like really over the top, far from reality. Yeah,

(01:31:43):
some of the one liners did not hit whatsoever, but
it actually was kind of a fun movie. Like oh yeah,
like it was. Yeah, it was a silly, fun movie.
Like again again like a lot of my.

Speaker 2 (01:31:56):
Is vandamn did he only had like maybe fifteen line right,
He didn't say much. He was just better that quiet. Yeah,
I'm just like this.

Speaker 1 (01:32:04):
Is best acting before it was best acting.

Speaker 2 (01:32:08):
Maybe it was supposed to be kind of like a western.
You know, the hero sometimes doesn't say much, right, this
speaks with well in this case, uh, he spoke with
like back spinning, flying kicks. After five shots, he shot
you five times and then he kicked you. It's almost
like insulting a little bit fuck you with you. I
know you're probably dead or dying, but you're gonna get
what You're gonna get.

Speaker 1 (01:32:28):
My foot in your face. You can suck my dick. Whoa, yeah,
I go eight point five. I didn't didn't care for
the one liners, but it was still fun and I
think it was fun. It was just fun to watch, right,
you know what I mean? Like it wasn't like like now,
it wasn't judging like I was just like it was
just fun to watch. Right. This is like, this is

(01:32:48):
not a critical judgment. It's it's a like I really had.
It really was fun, silly to watch and enjoy and
make comments on for the first hour and twenty minutes.
But the last half I was like, oh, we just
don't make comments. We just enjoy the silliness of the
last part because it's over the top. And Van Dam
didn't get his ass out. Yeah, and he need him

(01:33:09):
blood sports time cop. He kept it in his pants.
He seriously was amazed that he didn't have sex with
There was no boobs, and there was no night. I
thought that was pretty much his m Oh, honestly, well
this is a much more mature performance. All right. There
you have it.

Speaker 2 (01:33:28):
We're not going to tell you what's next unless Ryan
as a special pick.

Speaker 1 (01:33:31):
Hard to Kill. It's on Pluto for to be Free
right now, Steven, you better watch it now. Hard to
Kill yep. Okay, there you go, sense A Segal possibly
can we make fun of him about uh keep up
that bitches. There you go.

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Ep 57 - Hard Target

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