June 13, 2023 • 52 mins
Welcome to The Family Balancing Act! Where restoring the heart and ART of motherhood starts with one conversation at a time. I'm Maureen Huntley, your host, board-certified Integrative holistic and functional medicine health coach, Emotional Freedom Technique practitioner, mom, grandmother, wife, and CEO of my family's home operations.Everything is a prayer. What we think, say, and do. Our choices can create miracles or negativity. How do you make miracles show up in your life? My guest on this episode of The Family Balancing Act is Georgette Van Vliet. She is a life coach and author whose books highlight how important self-care and self-reflection are in attracting your dream life! She shares her own experiences dealing with depression and anxiety, and how central the Law of Attraction is in helping her heal every day. She has inspired many people through her coaching practice, her books, as well as her motivational speaking engagements and social media presence
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Maureen Huntley, MS https://maureenhuntley.com/ https://www.facebook.com/maureen.huntley?mibextid=LQQJ4d https://www.facebook.com/TheFamilyBalancingAct?mibextid=LQQJ4d https://www.instagram.com/mohuntley/ www.ctrnetwork.com/thefamilybalancingact
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TikTok: @Georgettevanvliet
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Maureen Huntley, MS https://maureenhuntley.com/ https://www.facebook.com/maureen.huntley?mibextid=LQQJ4d https://www.facebook.com/TheFamilyBalancingAct?mibextid=LQQJ4d https://www.instagram.com/mohuntley/ www.ctrnetwork.com/thefamilybalancingact
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GeorgetteVanVliet
https://www.georgettevanvliet.comhttps://www.facebook.com/Georgettevanvliethttps://www.instagram.com/Georgettevanvliet/
TikTok: @Georgettevanvliet
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:04):
Welcome to where the screen door slamsand the coffee mug hits the table.
You're listening to The Family Balancing Actwith me Loureen Huntley, Mom, grandmother,
and board certified Holistic and Functional Medicinehealth coach. Each episode will explore
the realities of your day to dayfamily life in this modern era of NonStop
(00:26):
texts, means and technology. Afterall, how do we keep ourselves saying
and our family healthy. I'll haveamazing guests and thought provoking discussions, and
we'll take a holistic look at familyhealth emotional, physical, mental, and
spiritual. Whether it's a micro perspectiveof family involving healthy snacks, teenagers with
(00:50):
an attitude, stressed out, husband'spartners, adult children, potty training,
eldercare, grandchildren, college breath,or a macro perspective of world events including
blue earthquakes, the brainwashing, media, finances, and oh so much more.
We'll find a way together. Sotake a deep, rapt exhale and
(01:11):
know that you're not alone. Bringon the Family Balancing Act. Welcome to
(01:49):
the Family Balancing Act, where restoringthe heart and art of motherhood starts with
one conversation at a time. I'mMaureen Huntley, your host, boards certified
integrate of Holistic and Functional Medicine,health coach, emotional freedom technique practitioner,
mom, grandmother, wife, andCEO of my family's home operations. So
(02:15):
do you talk to yourself to God? Are you getting the message? I
mean, our answer is showing upfor you. Look, Life nudges us
forward, sending us little signs thatwe can follow or not. Hey,
it's free will. I firmly believethat everything I say, think, and
(02:37):
do our prayers and those prayers arealways being answered. Maybe not how I
like them to be answered, orI think they should be, but they
are being answered. On this episodeof the Family Balancing Act, I am
so honored once again to have Georgettevan Vleet as my guest. She is
(02:59):
smart, she is fun, andshe's a ball of energy. She's a
life coach and an author whose bookshighlight how important self care and self reflection
are in attracting your dream life.So I so needed some self care,
self reflection and time to meditate,pray and be, and I'm so blessed
(03:25):
have attracted it as my Mother's Daygift. Yep, my Mother's Day gift
I did have to guide them thatway, though. But when I got
into my car heading out to awriter's conference and retreat that my children had
signed me up for, all theway from the Northeast down to Georgia,
I was overwhelmed with how grateful Iam for my family and it was the
(03:49):
break I so needed. The timeto write, to breathe, to move,
to pray, to meditate, andreally just to be and there showed
up well. Both on the waythere and on the way back. I
got to visit friends and reconnect withbeautiful, beautiful women that I hadn't seen
in years, and the joy ofthose connections still filled my heart to the
(04:13):
max. I think about it nowweeks later, in my heart the still
leaps for joy about our deep conversations. And then as I continued on my
merryway, I arrived at my destination. Driving into the parking lot of the
retreat center, I was filled withsuch anticipation for what could be. I
(04:34):
didn't know anyone going to this,and it was a huge leap of faith
to just leap into doing it.So I backed up my car into a
rather tight little spot and I satthere and I took a deep breath,
and I gathered up my purse,my keys, and my phone and I
sent the attention it was going tobe great. And then I wedged myself
(04:56):
out of my car as to nothit the car I was parked next to
with my door. Well, maybeI was concentrating on that just a little
too hard, as I had theflush of fear fall over me as I
tapped the white vehicle next to mein my car it's dark gray, and
I closed my car door and Ilooked at their car door and nothing had
(05:19):
happened. It was just a tap. I saw that the owner and the
driver in the car with the windowopen and the passenger side and I called
in excuse me, I said.There was no response. I thought I'll
try again, excuse me, andI could see her lips tighten. I
(05:42):
tapped your car, and I justwanted you to know. It looks okay,
but I just wanted you to know. And as I spoke, I
could see the rage rise up inher. Yet she wouldn't look at me,
she wouldn't speak to me, andshe wouldn't get out of the car.
It was confused. Oh, greatway to start my getaway. I'm
(06:02):
thinking to myself, watch, thisperson's going to be at the retreat.
Maybe I should just go back home. Maybe I'll just get the car now
and I'll just go right back home. Then I thought, no, that
would not be good for my kids. So I went around to the passenger
side of the car and I satdown, and I grabbed a water and
(06:23):
an apple, and I thought,although I really had to go to the
bathroom, like no one's business,I had to wait to see what would
happen next or if everything was okay. Well, this driver got on her
phone and started cussing and cursing andscreaming at the poor sotol on the other
end of the phone about what thisb which that would be me that had
(06:44):
opened her car door into her car, And after a few minutes she stopped
talking and then got out of hercar and walked around to see the car
door I attacked. And then shewalked back around a car and got back
into her car and again on thephone and started screaming again until a happy
young man came out of the buildingbounding towards her car. He was so
(07:09):
happy, he was filled with joy, And as he got into the car,
she unloaded on him and then shepeeled out of the parking lot,
screaming at him with expletives about moah. I could hear it for a good
thirty seconds. After they were gonefrom view, I felt numb. I
(07:30):
didn't know what to do. Isat there praying for them, for her,
for us, for me, andthen I started using my emotional freedom
technique tapping. Then I composed myself, I gathered my stuff, and as
I did, this beautiful, verytired woman pulled into the now empty space
with her car and she asks me, are you here for the writer's retreat?
(07:55):
Thank god, I said to myself, And she too had traveled far
and she was tired and hungry andwas desperate for this break. Well.
Over the next few days we becamefast friends. But if I hadn't had
the angry lady stopped me in mytracks, so I'd have to wait it
out my car, I'm not sosure I would have connected with my new
(08:18):
friend at all. Other things wouldhave happened. I'm an absolute awe of
how every action creates a reaction thatcreates a path. So many choices could
have been made. But sometimes whenI just sit with it, well,
actually I was afraid to leave mycar as I thought she'd do something to
(08:39):
it, but I sat with it. It gives me space to experience exactly
what I'm supposed to experience. Andwhen I stopped trying to control a situation
or the other people, I findmiracles happen. And if somebody I have
(09:01):
on today who knows all about miraclesis my guest, Georgette van Fleet.
She is a life coach and anauthor whose books highlight how important self care
and self reflection are in attracting yourdream life. She shares your own experiences
of dealing with depression and anxiety andhow central the law of attraction is in
(09:22):
helping her heal every single day.She has inspired many many people through her
coaching practice, her books, aswell as her amazing and motivational speaking engagements
and her social media presence. Iam so very honored to have you Georgette
today. You blow me away witheverything you do and how you reach others
(09:48):
with your wisdom. So welcome.Thank you, Maureen, that's a wonderful
introduction. Thank you so much.Nice to be here again with you.
I know well, I love havingyou with me, and you're just we're
kind of two pieces in a potor each side of the coin, or
you know, we get it witha lot of this energy and the crazy
(10:09):
stuff that happens when but when welet go and let God and let let
the law of attraction and and andlet all that beautiful energy that's out on
the planet and focus on the good, just letting it be come to us.
Thank you summarized it all when yousaid everything we say and thinks a
(10:31):
prayer. I wrote it down.What a great way to live your life.
Right before you even say anything,you're saying a prayer, and I
really think about your words and whatyou're thinking about. Thank you. It's
great today. Oh thank you.I really do believe that. But often,
being in my humanness, I willsay something and then it will dawn
(10:54):
on me that I just said aprayer asking for something I really don't want.
And that's the law of attraction.And we can say, you know
our dream board and put it outthere, you write about it and meditate
on it, you pray, butyou see yourself attracting. But if we're
not aware of this as we walkthrough life, that we're everything we're doing
(11:18):
is either bringing that to us.We're bringing the other thing to us or
nothing. We're stale because we're confusingthe energy. We're confused. God's like,
okay, enough, you know.I have tried to communicate, I've
tried to make this very clear.They're not picking up on it. So
(11:41):
I feel like in the last especiallylately, because I've been doing so much
work around this for years and tryingto understand my own frustrations and my own
depression. I think lately, whatI've realized about the law of attraction the
beauty is to want something, butto also be so grateful for what you
are to have. And I thinkthat's where people trip up, like I
really want this, but we haveto remember we have a lot. You
(12:05):
know, you have a lot inyour life. Your life is wonderful.
It's okay to want more, butit's also important to be grateful for what
you have. I think that reallyeases us into you know, the beauty
of you know, attracting what wewant. Yeah, and sometimes I feel
like the word gratitude isn't big enoughfor what I have in my life,
(12:30):
and it's really about relationships and people. It's not the things. The things
are a nice little add on,but you know, once you have your
things that you've set out there toget, you're gonna want other things,
and that the things never end,and then it becomes stuff we have to
get rid of. And even moreso than people and relationships, even just
(12:54):
being in complete awe that you cansee, that you can hear, that
you can move your hands, thatyou can walk, like just everything that
we take for granted all day longabout our bodies and our minds. If
you really, if you really stopto think about it, you would be
an awe. You'd be amazed atthe incredible all your abilities all day long
(13:16):
that we just assume you wake up, you jump out of bed, you
go to work, and drive yourcar. Those are all amazing things to
think about and to be grateful for. Yeah, and we are. And
if we don't stay focused on onon what the possibilities are and and what
is it that really fills our souls, we don't kind of really connect to
(13:41):
that you have talked about, youknow, the energy around asking yourself loads
of questions, like just constantly,you know, pouring in the questions that
move you forward rather than the questionsof like move us back or failure or
(14:05):
why me? The pathetic perth andstory victimhood. I have to say I
was the queen of victimhood, noton purpose. I didn't know any better.
I didn't know. I was thequeen of why why? And And
you're right, it doesn't move youforward. It just keeps you stuck in
a little circle and you have noanswers and no solutions. And I think
(14:28):
one of the when I was atmy worst really with depression and feeling like
why is my life so stuck?Why can't I why do I feel so
unlucky, you know, and askingmyself the question what makes me happy?
Like what do I want? Andrealizing I had never asked myself that before,
and so of course my life.Of course, I wasn't feeling fulfilled.
(14:50):
I didn't know what I wanted,you know, it's a you know,
I was on a call yesterday witha group of women and and we
were talking about what we want andgetting very clear and you know, setting
our goals. And it was likea goal setting call and and are just
really getting clear about what you want, like one thing you really want,
(15:13):
And one of the women, who'sa little older, it was like she
responded with I don't really know whatI want. I've achieved X, Y
and Z, and I don't eventhink you have to be older to get
to this place. You can beyou know, forty and being well,
I've done all this. I'm amom, and I'm doing this. I
always wanted to be a mom,but I never thought about beyond that,
(15:37):
or I wanted the you know,my relationship to be like this. But
things are a little stale now,or there's things we're not communicating clearly,
or we're trying. But where doyou what energizes the the clarity around the
intention. It's a great question,and I think what you said earlier,
(16:02):
it's that conflicting energy, like whoam I to ask for more? Right?
I have a beautiful home, Ihave a family. Who am I
to ask for more? Or theguilt you feel about wanting more being ambitious.
I think a lot of us strugglewith that, and I think that
that's why it's so important to beable to say I'm so blessed I have
my family, or I have mygreat job or whatever it is that you
(16:23):
have, like feeling really blessed aboutwhat you have and also being excited to
have more, like being okay withthat, being okay to ask for whatever
is it you want and really understandingthat's where the inspiration is. The energy
comes when you're excited and you're lookingforward to something. And I know you
and I have talked about this withour business, like I love what I
(16:45):
do, Like this gives me somuch energy and passion. If I weren't
doing it, I do think apart of me would die. So that's
where I think people have to getclear, like don't feel guilty that you
want more, don't worry about otherpeople not having or what's happening in someone
else's life. That's their journey,that's their story. But you need you
need to be okay with asking formore or asking for what you want and
(17:07):
then going for it and having noguilt. Yeah. Yeah, because we
can't fix anybody else. We can'tchange what anybody else would anyone and be
our children, our spouses, ourparents, our neighbors. We cannot change
what they want, what they think, what they do with nothing. We
(17:33):
can guide, but we cannot changeanything. And it's so easy to get
caught up in the anger. Likethe story I had with that woman,
I was bewildered as to why isthis is an attack on me? But
it wasn't an attack on me.Something had happened to her, something wasn't
(17:57):
right, And if I had reallydamaged the car, I'm sure she would
have unleashed on me. So butit was just I was easy tag to
do that, and I think totake and turn it around as I did,
just to be open. And Ithink that's what happened, was that
(18:18):
I was like, okay, handingthis back to this person. And that's
what we have to do when weget out there and we want to find
what energizes us. I know youtold me the story story earlier, and
I loved when you told me thestory that you prayed for them because they
needed it prayer, Like, nobodywants to be that angry. That's no
way that nobody could be happy livingtheir life with that much anger. So
(18:40):
I thought it was great that yousaid a prayer. But I also think
and I love that you put thisup because here's where I know, for
me, my energy has been drainedfor years. I would have thought about
that and focused on that, Whywhy'd that happen? That's not where you
want to put your energy. Likefor you, you were going to a
writing workshop, you had to focuson writing or for me when things like
(19:00):
that happened happened this morning with thework situation. If I focus on that,
I wouldn't have the energy to talkto you. But another way that
I am. So it's really thinkingabout, well do I have control over
this? If the answer is no, what can I focus on what's important
to me? And that's where youdirect your energy. That's that's beautiful because
I know that what you're referencing withwork, and that's a miracle. Like
(19:22):
even the miracle for me in themoment was when that when other woman got
out of the car and and shewas like, oh, are you here
for the writer's workshop? I waslike yes. So then my game I
was. I was back. ButI had to give I had to give
up the prayers. I had togive up the energy to back to the
(19:45):
other people or back to that otherwoman and and just trust that that was
taken care of. And that immediatelyopened up for me. I mean,
she could have parked somewhere else,It could have been another situation, or
you could have maybe maybe years passedbefore you did all this work. This
(20:07):
would have been me years ago.This beautiful woman would have gotten out of
the car and instead of enjoying themoment, I'd be like, let me
tell you what just happened to me, And I would have and I would
have gushed this negativity even just sayingthat I can feel the energy, and
it probably would have ruined my weekend. Right, So right to do this
work. Right, Doing this workand understanding energy and focus really helps you.
(20:27):
Like you said, you said aprayer, you'll let it go.
Someone came in and filled it withbeautiful and I will be on it.
I will be honest because when Idid see her and she did say,
I said, oh, I justhad something very jarring happened to me,
and it's so nice to meet you. But I did touch on it,
so it wasn't like I could letit go completely. And it definitely it
(20:48):
took. But this is it's aprocess. It really is a process.
So what are some other questions wecan ask ourselves to get to that place?
So I love obviously, what doyou want? And if I if
someone doesn't know what they want?Like for me, I journaled that question
(21:10):
every day for about six months,what do I want? One? And
I allowed whatever I wanted to flowon the paper like I just allowed myself
to be. So that's a reallygood question to really focus on. And
it's okay if it changes. It'sokay. If you say what do I
want today and tomorrow, it's different. In the next day, it's different
because what your mind is doing foryou is sifting and sorting. It's helping
(21:30):
you get to the place of clarity. You may not happen right away.
So like if I were somebody thatwere practicing this, I would have fun
with it. I would just writeplan I would write every Yeah, I
would just write every day with funand the idea of it's you know,
if it changes, that's okay.I'm learning about myself. I'm learning about
what I want. And maybe evenwhen you're writing that you might this happened
(21:52):
to me, happens to a lotof people. You remember something that you
enjoy doing When you were a childthat used to love to write poetry.
I forgot that. I still loveto so I still love to sell.
Like so there are things about usthat we may have suppressed and forgotten.
So that's a really great question.And of course what will make me happy,
like just knowing what will make mehappy, And for a lot of
(22:14):
us, we expect our spouse tomake us happy. We want our children
to make us happy. It's youknow, we've got to get to the
substance of ourselves. Like I loveto read, that makes me happy,
or I love to cool for walksthat makes me happy. And I talk
about this a lot. I'm nottalking about shopping. You know a lot
of times we do things that arenot that you don't need to go shopping,
but it's about substance, like whatfills you, like really getting to
(22:37):
the core of what fills you.Yeah, then what dar isn't going to
necessarily fail you? Right right?Yeah, Like you said before, you
know things, things, things,and I love things. Don't get me
wrong. I love to go shopping, but I know now that that's not
where I look for fulfillment. Iknow that's not going to because, like
you said, if I get aJaguar, I'm gonna want a Ferrari or
(22:57):
whatever it. Maybe if I govacation here, I want to go there,
And that's great. Those are allgreat, But about fulfillment and about
happiness and joy that I'm looking forin my life all day long. I
don't want it to be fleeting,like, oh this might be happy for
a minute. Then you know,how can I be up of the down?
The up of the down? Andand that's why I call these miracles
(23:18):
because when you do finally like clickinto oh gosh, I used to sew,
I think I'm going to try tosew something. Or I used to
snow snow. I used to sew. I used to play in the snow.
Being from the Midwest, um ice, skate and and knit um and
so those are those things do bringme joy. I might not be any
(23:41):
good at them anymore, but toyou know, get a little frustrated,
but to actually connect the things weused to do, yeah, because they
kind of they build on who webecome. And now I have to look
at people who talk about, well, I don't know what to do as
a career and blah blah blah,I want to change my career. A
(24:04):
lot of women I friends of mineand women that connected with they're they're kind
of lost and where they what theywant to create and they and this is
where clarity gets really funky. Andas I have worked through this too,
I know you have also. Itkind of comes from what where we started
(24:25):
in life? What were the thingswe like to do? What were the
things we like to do with peoplelike to be helpers, we like to
be of service, we like toto listen to stories, we like to
tell stories. And you're a fantasticwriter. Georgette is a fantastic writer.
She's also a credible editor. She'sedded things in mind, but she's so
(24:47):
connecting back to this the things weused to like to do, but then
they become broader because we become broader, right, and there are some things
you can't do, like my I'mnot going to roller blade again. I'm
not going to take that chance offalling, you know, like I love
to rollerblade. So it's also thatchange too, like as you age,
(25:08):
you know, what are you what'srealistic? What are you willing to do?
And I think a lot of whatwe're talking about, like getting connected
to yourself, it really happens inthe quietude, like the silence which a
lot of us if we have families, if you're busy jobs, if we're
commuting, we don't have much ofthat. So even like your prayer again,
(25:30):
prayer, it's a quietness within you. It's you know, it's just
finding time to really connect to that. And I know that one of the
biggest things I talk about a lotin my workshops, into my books.
It's going for a walk and likelistening to the birds chirping, feeling the
breeze on your face, like reallyconnecting with the simplicity of life that a
(25:52):
lot of us forget. Right,how many times do we with all that
is? And that is that isthat quiet within is also the quiet without,
and that is God energy, thatis God, that is the all
of creation, what was created andnot you know, and like keeping busy,
(26:17):
busy, busy. I now lookand moms and even you know,
just women who are working all thetime, or for mommies, whatever it's
we're always busy. We're taking careof the animals. We talked about that
now they can just take over lotsof your time and energy. Our children
take over time and energy. Andeven when they grow up and they've gone
(26:38):
and they're living their own lives,we're still thinking about them. We're still
thinking about, well, does Juniorstill do this? Does he still does
he miss my macaroni and cheese?Does he? You know? Whatever?
It just you know, it's afascinating life. It's fascinating. But also
like that also takes the focus awayfrom you. It's very easy for us
(27:00):
as women to think about everything elsebut ourselves because it's not we don't know
how to do it, so it'suncomfortable if you haven't practiced. And I
think a lot of women feel like, well, that's selfish. I don't
want to be sad. It's nowherenear selfish to focus on your dreams and
your goals. It doesn't mean you'reever going to neglect your children, even
(27:21):
if they're grown, or your husbandor the fur baby. Like you know,
it's just about us making some spaceto be able to feel and to
be able to connect to who weare. And you know, you say
you talk about God. I believein God, and I've spent a lot
of time alone in the last fewyears really trying to connect to myself,
feeling disconnected and trying to connect andwhatever the word people want to use,
(27:45):
the universe. Spirit. Boy,when you spend time alone, you realize
God is right here, like yourintuition, your ability to us to feel
things internally is so strong if youallow yourself to feel it, if you
build in that time. And it'suncomfortable in the beginning, spending time alone
in the beginning. To me,it was like my skin was crawling.
(28:07):
I wanted to do something and callsomeone, but I forced myself to do
it and I once I worked throughthat and I was my nervous system calmdown.
Boy. It was the most peaceful, beautiful place that I can talk
into now any time I want to. That's beautiful. And you can do
that at any on and off duringthe day, just to connect with that,
(28:30):
and when you do, you realizethat's what you come from. That's
where we started. That's really willnessand hopefully and to know of it and
to know that for the rest ofmy life, I never have to ask
anyone else, what do you thinkof this? I can. All I
have to do is stop and askmyself and I get the answer, Like
(28:52):
I no longer have to look outsideof myself for anything. And that's what
a strength and calm do you wantto where you comefidence comes from. That's
that's where your confidence comes from.And knowing you for years now, I
want to acknowledge you and that isI have seen you grow in confidence and
(29:12):
it's beautiful and it's exactly you dothe work. You do your work,
you do exactly what you talk aboutyou talk about like making really big changes
in one's life, and they canbe big, small, any kind of
changes, but it starts with thesteps of moving forward and taking the time
to go within. And I knowfor me, my big issue is often
(29:37):
looking towards the people I love inmy life to validate my very existence,
to tell me I'm doing something well, or to see me as something.
You know that I think they justautomatically through osmosis should know. And that's
not fair to them, and it'snot fair to me to be constantly grabbing
(29:59):
him that. That's been an internalbattle for years. Yeah, And I
find that when I when you learnhow to do this, when you really
spend time alone and you and youget you get really real with yourself and
you know who you are, youknow what you want, you know,
you learn how to make yourself happy. All of a sudden, the marriage
(30:19):
gets better, all of a sudden, the relationship with your children gets better,
all of a sudden, everything getsbetter. And if something has to
go, like if you have tomove or maybe if the marriage does have
to end, at least you've donethe work on yourself. I think the
hardest thing for me is a lifecoach is to watch people say I'm unhappy,
I'm going to get divorced, Well, you know, to automatically blame
(30:41):
the marriage or to blame anyone beforeyou do the work on yourself and say,
well, how you know, what'smy partner? What can I do
first? What can I look atin my life? What can I fix?
What's even small changes can I makewithin my own sphere before I make
a big decision like that? AndI think that that's a huge one for
(31:02):
me if I can get that acrossto people. More than anything, Before
you change the job, before youchange the relationship, work on yourself,
because when you feel good, everythingchanges everything. It's a miracle. That's
the miracle too. And I knowI've talked about this a lot years ago.
In my deep depression when you metme and I could barely talk,
I was like this. I thoughtmy marriage was stinky. I didn't I
(31:25):
wasn't happy with my life. AsI did the work on myself, everything
has improved. I have a greatmarriage, I have a great relationship with
my son, who you just sawagain for the first time in years.
And I told you today my worksituation is great, like so many things
I've shifted and nothing changed but me. So sometimes we're the traffic gem,
right, Sometimes it's us, andI can look at myself and laugh and
(31:48):
be like, all right, you'rethe one. You know, you're the
one that's been toxic at times.You know, I'm the one that needed
to change and grow. And it'sbeen wonderful, because it's been wonderful because,
like you said earlier, with theone and being so angry, that
could have been me. That couldeasily have been me if I didn't do
this work, and you know,could be any of us, and actually
(32:09):
probably has been any of any andall of us throughout our lives, the
choices we make, the anger wehave around our children sometimes, or somebody's
doing something wrong to our kids.I mean, god knows, if something
really horrific, you have every rightto lose your mind. But if it's
you know, another, you know, another small, a small situation,
(32:34):
it's it's a matter of just doinga check on yourself and where you're at.
You have to do the inner work, find the peace within before you
can actually make a really big difference. And that ping being the ping,
as I call it, the perfectI like that the pebble in the water
(32:59):
you and if we all become thepebble in the water or the pin,
that vibration goes out from us andeverything else around you starts to change.
And I've had some stuff recently inmy life, which we'll talk about in
a later podcast. But where miraclesare, they just keep happening. And
(33:19):
the more I talk about, themore I announce that, I declare it.
Miracles are happening in my life constantly. Now. They really are just
things I never thought would be resolved, things I never thought could be possible.
Things I thought were ending are notending. It's me that has changed,
(33:40):
and it's the pin. And ifwe could look at the pin.
I love that if all of uscan look at the pin, Like the
minute you're upset with someone and youlook at it as a ping, won't
it change what you're going to say? Like maybe you were about to yell
at someone or tell them off,maybe you would help you say it a
nicer way or a more constructive way, in a more loving way, to
(34:04):
be building relationships and to be spreadingpositivity and support to people. Like if
you could just see that everything's aripple, how much that would affect the
way you respond to any situation.I love that love. It's love,
it's joy, and yes, ofcourse on the you know, emotional scale,
we're going to feel everything because we'rehumans and we're just going to feel
(34:28):
you know, rage, anger,joy, happiness, love. You know,
we're going to go through the wholething. But it is toxic when
we're not trying to move, dothe work. And so when a woman,
let's when you know a mom's areso busy, or when you know
grandmothers are exhausted because they're also they'rehelping, as I know, helping with
(34:52):
kids and working and doing everything wedo and just trying to get through life.
And then there is also of likelife stuff happening. Where do you
begin how do you fit it intoyour life? Well, I love what
you just said about miracles happening everywhere. I forgot exactly how you say.
(35:14):
You have to write that down inthe chat box, right, But that's
not It starts with affirmations like that. It starts with like you said that
it felt so good and that's somethingthat I want to write down because what
I do is I'll write that downand I'll say that all day long.
It's really about us building our beliefsystem in ourselves about believing that you know
(35:35):
that life is a miracle, thatlife is joy, that there's love everywhere.
It's just you know, so thatno matter what's happening, no matter
how upset you may be, Likefor me, I know you were just
happening before. I'm always doing this. Love love, love. I see
love in this situation because I canbe so angry, right, but if
I do this, I see lovein the situation. No matter what the
(35:57):
situation is, I can find abetter solution. And then yelling, raising
my voice telling someone up, whichby the way, I haven't done in
years. I just don't live mylife like that anymore, you know,
Thank goodness. It makes me feelgood. But it all starts with this.
It all starts with being able tostop yourself. And yeah, that
that too. Like the other day, something a memory came up and it
(36:19):
was such a trigger about not beingsupported and I was like, no,
no, no, we're not goingthere, We're not going the right minute
I was able to tap. Andthen the next thing I do is so
I was feeling unsupported, something happened, I was feeling unsupported. But the
next thing I do is say,of course you're supported. Again in affirmation,
of course you're supported. And Ithink of all the people in my
(36:42):
life have supported me, maybe andI'll feel it today, but I've had
support my entire life, my grandparents, I can think of beautiful memories,
friends, you have supported me,like you've supported me so like so different
directions, right, And is ittrue like when you're feeling those negative when
you're getting angry, when you're gettingupset, like to stopping up? Is
(37:05):
it really true? Like? Isit like really is it true that no
one likes as a coach, wewill call I love it, They want
to date, no one loves me. It's not really true. Your mother
wants you, right, even ifshe's past, she loves you, your
father, your puppy, whatever.There's love everywhere. There's support everywhere,
And so even does not feel goodeven saying it, and it just it
does. It does because our ancestorssupport us. They're on the other side.
(37:30):
God supports us, Jesus supports us. They support us. But you
were so caught up in this worldwe're in that we get our heads clouded
over with the words coming at us. And that so something that I continue
to work on and just once you'reyour reflection on this UM. I find
(37:53):
that as I listen more than talk, although on a podcast I talk more
than I should sometimes, but tworeally hear what someone is saying and not
think about the next thing I'm goingto say. It's beautiful. I have
(38:19):
to work on that as well.It's to work out. Definitely have to
work in it as well. Idid want to say though, that just
back to the other comment, likesomething like you just said, like we
get frustrated with life and its life, but if you really think about it,
what are you frustrated about? Solike, sometimes when I get upset
about like I've gained weight and it'sI get frustrated about that. I'm like,
(38:40):
how did I let this happen?But then when I think about it,
Okay, so that's the only thingthat's bothering you right now, That's
okay. Like sometimes we think theweight gain is everything, but in the
big picture, it's really not.If every other things are going well in
your life, focused on those things, you know, you can try to
lose weight. We're done it,But to make it the center of your
(39:02):
frustration or your angst, I think, and maybe that would help us all
listen better too. That's a reallygood with which we didn't have so much
angst. Right if we could justlook, it's okay, everything's okay.
Right, to just make peace withit all, Yeah, and to work
on things. It's okay that Ihave to lose some weight, It's okay.
It's okay that I'm still working withmy business and building it's okay.
(39:25):
But yeah, like peace with everythingelse, that's you know what. Yeah,
And actually the gratitude around the thestuff, the crap that doesn't work,
to be grateful for how it showsup, why it shows up,
how it shows up, and howit's not going to be given that much
(39:52):
of a light anymore. And alsoto kind of like I love to say
to God, like, all right, what do you want me to learn
here? But something's not working outas fast as I wanted to. It
means it's a little there's more.There are more life lessons in this.
So whatever it is that I'm strugglingwith has taught me so much, you
know, there's so much to learn. And so if something isn't working out
(40:13):
yet, if I don't have exactlywhat I want, I'm still working at
it. So therefore I'm still learning, I'm still growing, right, So
it's just love it. Yeah,it's just all about like, okay,
like I'm meant to learn more here. And I do believe that whether it's
you want to meet your soulmate orwhatever, or you want to you're working
on a relationship, whatever, maybewhen you finally get whatever you're meant to
(40:37):
learn, it's it's those it's thatpain, right, it's an aha moment
of ah, now things are goingto come together. So we're just growing
and learning and you know, workinghopefully all of us are working at pulling
it all together to feel successful,love and whatever it is that we want.
And you know success, who knowswhat success is? Success, it's
(41:00):
really love, it's joy, it'shappiness. It's it's not allowing the crazy,
crazy distractions of life to pull usaway, because that, to me
is almost demonic, you know whatI mean? Like, I find that
(41:21):
with those distractions are the you know, for better term, is the devil
pulling us away from our true essence. Is the energy, the negative energy
pulling us away from who we trulyare, which is love and light.
And I agree with you and ifthat is absolutely the definition of success when
(41:45):
you like when you I'm sorry,I just thought of something I wanted to
say it earlier. We should alwaysbe seeking the light, right, Like
we should always be like, nomatter what's happening, you're frustrated or angry,
whatever negative emotions, seek the light, like what you know, how
can you make it better? Alwaysgo towards the light. I always think
about that with God and just thatenergy of you know, but um,
(42:07):
I just also by train and thoughtI wanted to say something. Um yeah,
but it's like that that energy thatpulls us away from them, right
right, So back to success,right back to the like, you've got
to feel good about yourself. Youhave to know and be confident that you're
living your life ethically, you're nothurting anyone. You know, you're you're,
(42:29):
you're, you're, you're feeling goodabout yourself. Whatever it is that
you're doing, whatever you're, whateveryou're whatever, whatever the work is that
you do or whatever that you're you'redoing the right thing. And I think
that's success. I think that's whenpeople if you know that nothing else will
affect you, that ripple, likethat demonic stuff won't affect you. I
love that, Thank you. Ithink that secrets are the big thing that
(42:54):
pull people away from their true essence. And you know they say, oh,
I just a little white lie.I've done this little thing here and
I we all do it, weall do them. Not everybody has to
know. Are you know some ofour secrets? But the big secrets that
affect other people and how we treatothers, how we treat ourselves, needs
(43:17):
to be addressed. Yeah, Andit's also that that's a detached detachment.
That's like you're just pushing people.You're not connecting when you're when you're living
secrets and not they have to telleverybody everything. But I know exactly what
you mean, like like if acknowledgethem for yourself, right, it's true.
And also just you're not detachment,that's the wrong word. When you
(43:40):
don't share with someone, you're notconnecting, Like you know, our lives
were meant to be connected and supportone another. So if you're trying to
do something alone, if you're inshame or whatever, you're not connecting with
people. You're pushing them away,and that makes it worse. That's even
that brings more negativity. So sometimesI think you when you connect, you
(44:00):
just feel so good. You know, it just feel so good to you
know, to self connect, justconnect by soul and just find that way
or award and releasing the negativity.So when do you when now you're still
you still journal every day, whendo you tell your clients or when do
(44:23):
you recommend journaling? Is it firstthing in the morning, or is it
whenever you're feeling it throughout the day, or is it before you go to
bed at night, or is itall those times you can beay, it's
all those times for me journaling.I started journaling with Julia Cameron's The Artist's
Way Beautiful, you know, themorning pages. So I've been doing it
in the morning for many, manyyears, but there have definitely been times
(44:46):
when I journal in the afternoon,in the evening. It depends on what
I need. So there was atime, like a couple of years ago,
when I was going through a reallydifficult time, very very difficult,
and I had no confidence in myself, is completely depleted, and I needed
to journal every afternoon. Like Iwould every afternoon I would make a list
of all the things I thought aboutmyself, like you're not good enough,
(45:08):
you're this, you're that, likeall these I had so much negativity,
and then I would sit and writethe opposite in the second column, and
I would do that. I didthat for a long time. Like that
was a beautiful practice for me,back to the affirmations of like consistently saying
you're good enough. You know,I choose happiness. Of course I can
have what I want or whatever Iwrote, just really retraining my brain to
(45:31):
believe in myself and to know thatI was worthy. So I had to
do a lot of work around that. And then some people at to journal
at night because it goes into itsets into their subconscious. They could dream
about it and visualize it in theirdreams. That's wonderful too. So many
ways to journal, but you haveto be consistent. Whatever you choose,
you should do it every day orevery other day, whatever you can do
(45:53):
right right. And it doesn't haveto be a dissertation. It can be
a one minute blip, salute ly. I mean for me it was a
little bit longer because I had toplour out all this stuff. I had
to get all of this out ofme. If you don't feel that way,
if you're just journal and just tofigure out what you want and it's
simple, that's fine. Too.You want to make a list. That's
(46:14):
no one has to look at yourjournal. There's no judgment. You do
it your way. But it hasto feel good to you. You have
to like when you're done journally,feel them smiling. It has to feel
good. Now. I know alot of people, or I read many
places that it's great to you know, you write your purge, you get
it all out of you. Youkeep writing and writing and writing. And
you know, some of us livein homes where people might look at our
(46:37):
journals or might you know, wemight leave it out because we're busy and
things. So I've heard, youknow, taking and not rereading what you've
written, just letting it because you'vereleased it, and then ripping the pages
up and out. You can burnthem and send them to heaven or whatever,
(46:58):
or I don't know them in thebackyard. But do you have a
feeling around what one does with thejournal when they're kind of moved through?
I do. I journaled for many, many years and it was all a
dump. I hate myself, Ihate the way I look. I'm at
at my mother. I can't believethis happen. And then one day I
was like, this is not gettingme anywhere. So I stopped journaling anything
(47:19):
negative. Anybody can come in myhouse and read my journals. They're all
about my ambition, about my goals. So I've taken all that energy and
turned it into what do I want? Like what do you know? What
do I And I've just stopped complainingin my journals. It just and again,
you can do whatever you want.You can burn it, you can
throw it in the garbage. Iused to soak them in water so nobody
(47:40):
could read it and throw it out. But I have to say that when
I stopped doing that and started focusingon solutions, what do I want?
What makes me happy? My journalingit got very very It got more educational
for me, like it really becamesomething like, oh like therapy, like
therapy exactly. And also back tothat intuitiveness, like when I spend time
(48:04):
alone and I learned that God waswithin me and I would allow myself to
write whatever I wanted. My intuitionwas spelling things out for me, so
it was beautiful. It was beautiful, like an automatic writing experience. You
just let flow and it's a beautifuland there's a there's a you know,
typing it isn't the same as lettinggo from your head down your arm into
(48:27):
your hand to write with the kinesthetic. So hopefully believe that. I totally
believe that some of a lot ofpeople they talk into their phones and that's
how they journal. I'm not bigon rereading. Sometimes I am big on
it, but I really don't wantto reread what I've purged. I want
to move through it and just releaseit. I love the idea of soaking
(48:51):
it. I've actually torn it upand burned it before. I think it's
great to just let it go andlet God. And then I love the
positivity piece because I think we haveI know that I've had to clear it
out and then start working on amore positive or change the discussion within my
(49:13):
writing, and the discussion is meand God, me and me, me
and you know whomever I'm having stuffwith, but really changing it to a
more positive outlook. Because for tenyears I would about I want to lose
weight. I didn't do it,you know what I mean? Like I
was writing the same things over andover, like the dump, and then
I realized, I'm just dump.I'm not fixing it was. I wasn't
(49:35):
doing anything. It wasn't moving meforward. So I'm not saying you should
never dump. Sometimes you do haveto dump sometimes, you know. I
haven't done it recently, but I'vehad to scream. I've had to go
and like my car and let itout when I'm driving, or maybe I've
said things in my car that noone can hear that I just need to
helpfully do it. But as faras writing it, I started to really
(49:57):
shift it to what do I want? What entered drives me. I could
really get moved in that direction becausethere was no movement before that. I
wasn't even taking when I was inmy deep depression, I couldn't even take
small steps. It helped me moveforward. So that's kind of where that's
been my how I've been joining forthe past ten years now. That is
fantastic. And it's also about whatyou don't want right and when you're write
(50:20):
right, this is I don't wantto do this anymore. I don't want
to be negative anymore. I don'twant to be complaining anymore. I don't
want to hate my husband anymore.I don't want to hate you know,
whatever, whatever it is that you'reworking through. Well, as we close
today, I want all our listenersto know where they can find you,
where they can find your books.A little bit about your books, because
they really are powerful. Little thankyou. Yes, my books are.
(50:45):
They're on Amazon, but they're alsoon my website, which is my name
georget Endlei dot com. That's alsomy social media handle. I post videos
everyday, motivational videos on Instagram andFacebook and TikTok. And my books are
about obviously, they started with myjourney when I was in my deepest depression.
I became a self help guru.I really just devoured anything I could
(51:06):
and learned and practiced. So mybooks are about the habits and the skills
that you need because I think whenI was in my deepest depression, I
had no skills to get out ofit. I didn't know how to get
out of it. I had noidea. And a lot of the stuff
in my books, too, isabout learning to communicate because I've been married
for twenty five years and I knowwe've had this conversation and I had no
(51:27):
idea how to communicate with someone.I had no idea. Besides, Aha,
everything's great, but when things gotcomplicated, right mortgage children, It's
like what do you do now?And you know, like most marriages,
there's a lot of silence in ourhome because no one he didn't know how
to communicate either, and learning howto be able to say, you know
what, I don't know how tosay what I need to say? Can
you just hear me out and let'slet me say what I need to say
(51:50):
without judgment, and just learning howto talk to each other. So it's
really about those skills and those habitsthat we need to feel good about ourselves.
That's sort of all my books sortof bound, and they're all e
books are simple, they're quick becauseI know when I was in the height
of my depression, even though Iwanted to read a three hundred page book,
I couldn't. That wasn't happening,So yeah, right right, I
just try to keep them like afifty pages quick clip. You know.
(52:13):
Rights that's great because they know thatthey helped so many people. And I'm
again so grateful to have you ontoday. And um, we'll definitely have
another bigger conversation around another piece ofintentions and wellness. So if everybody given
(52:34):
me take a moment, just perfecteyes, big rap
Welcome to where the screen door slamsand the coffee mug hits the table.
You're listening to The Family Balancing Actwith me Loureen Huntley, Mom, grandmother,
and board certified Holistic and Functional Medicinehealth coach. Each episode will explore
the realities of your day to dayfamily life in this modern era of NonStop
(00:26):
texts, means and technology. Afterall, how do we keep ourselves saying
and our family healthy. I'll haveamazing guests and thought provoking discussions, and
we'll take a holistic look at familyhealth emotional, physical, mental, and
spiritual. Whether it's a micro perspectiveof family involving healthy snacks, teenagers with
(00:50):
an attitude, stressed out, husband'spartners, adult children, potty training,
eldercare, grandchildren, college breath,or a macro perspective of world events including
blue earthquakes, the brainwashing, media, finances, and oh so much more.
We'll find a way together. Sotake a deep, rapt exhale and
(01:11):
know that you're not alone. Bringon the Family Balancing Act. Welcome to
(01:49):
the Family Balancing Act, where restoringthe heart and art of motherhood starts with
one conversation at a time. I'mMaureen Huntley, your host, boards certified
integrate of Holistic and Functional Medicine,health coach, emotional freedom technique practitioner,
mom, grandmother, wife, andCEO of my family's home operations. So
(02:15):
do you talk to yourself to God? Are you getting the message? I
mean, our answer is showing upfor you. Look, Life nudges us
forward, sending us little signs thatwe can follow or not. Hey,
it's free will. I firmly believethat everything I say, think, and
(02:37):
do our prayers and those prayers arealways being answered. Maybe not how I
like them to be answered, orI think they should be, but they
are being answered. On this episodeof the Family Balancing Act, I am
so honored once again to have Georgettevan Vleet as my guest. She is
(02:59):
smart, she is fun, andshe's a ball of energy. She's a
life coach and an author whose bookshighlight how important self care and self reflection
are in attracting your dream life.So I so needed some self care,
self reflection and time to meditate,pray and be, and I'm so blessed
(03:25):
have attracted it as my Mother's Daygift. Yep, my Mother's Day gift
I did have to guide them thatway, though. But when I got
into my car heading out to awriter's conference and retreat that my children had
signed me up for, all theway from the Northeast down to Georgia,
I was overwhelmed with how grateful Iam for my family and it was the
(03:49):
break I so needed. The timeto write, to breathe, to move,
to pray, to meditate, andreally just to be and there showed
up well. Both on the waythere and on the way back. I
got to visit friends and reconnect withbeautiful, beautiful women that I hadn't seen
in years, and the joy ofthose connections still filled my heart to the
(04:13):
max. I think about it nowweeks later, in my heart the still
leaps for joy about our deep conversations. And then as I continued on my
merryway, I arrived at my destination. Driving into the parking lot of the
retreat center, I was filled withsuch anticipation for what could be. I
(04:34):
didn't know anyone going to this,and it was a huge leap of faith
to just leap into doing it.So I backed up my car into a
rather tight little spot and I satthere and I took a deep breath,
and I gathered up my purse,my keys, and my phone and I
sent the attention it was going tobe great. And then I wedged myself
(04:56):
out of my car as to nothit the car I was parked next to
with my door. Well, maybeI was concentrating on that just a little
too hard, as I had theflush of fear fall over me as I
tapped the white vehicle next to mein my car it's dark gray, and
I closed my car door and Ilooked at their car door and nothing had
(05:19):
happened. It was just a tap. I saw that the owner and the
driver in the car with the windowopen and the passenger side and I called
in excuse me, I said.There was no response. I thought I'll
try again, excuse me, andI could see her lips tighten. I
(05:42):
tapped your car, and I justwanted you to know. It looks okay,
but I just wanted you to know. And as I spoke, I
could see the rage rise up inher. Yet she wouldn't look at me,
she wouldn't speak to me, andshe wouldn't get out of the car.
It was confused. Oh, greatway to start my getaway. I'm
(06:02):
thinking to myself, watch, thisperson's going to be at the retreat.
Maybe I should just go back home. Maybe I'll just get the car now
and I'll just go right back home. Then I thought, no, that
would not be good for my kids. So I went around to the passenger
side of the car and I satdown, and I grabbed a water and
(06:23):
an apple, and I thought,although I really had to go to the
bathroom, like no one's business,I had to wait to see what would
happen next or if everything was okay. Well, this driver got on her
phone and started cussing and cursing andscreaming at the poor sotol on the other
end of the phone about what thisb which that would be me that had
(06:44):
opened her car door into her car, And after a few minutes she stopped
talking and then got out of hercar and walked around to see the car
door I attacked. And then shewalked back around a car and got back
into her car and again on thephone and started screaming again until a happy
young man came out of the buildingbounding towards her car. He was so
(07:09):
happy, he was filled with joy, And as he got into the car,
she unloaded on him and then shepeeled out of the parking lot,
screaming at him with expletives about moah. I could hear it for a good
thirty seconds. After they were gonefrom view, I felt numb. I
(07:30):
didn't know what to do. Isat there praying for them, for her,
for us, for me, andthen I started using my emotional freedom
technique tapping. Then I composed myself, I gathered my stuff, and as
I did, this beautiful, verytired woman pulled into the now empty space
with her car and she asks me, are you here for the writer's retreat?
(07:55):
Thank god, I said to myself, And she too had traveled far
and she was tired and hungry andwas desperate for this break. Well.
Over the next few days we becamefast friends. But if I hadn't had
the angry lady stopped me in mytracks, so I'd have to wait it
out my car, I'm not sosure I would have connected with my new
(08:18):
friend at all. Other things wouldhave happened. I'm an absolute awe of
how every action creates a reaction thatcreates a path. So many choices could
have been made. But sometimes whenI just sit with it, well,
actually I was afraid to leave mycar as I thought she'd do something to
(08:39):
it, but I sat with it. It gives me space to experience exactly
what I'm supposed to experience. Andwhen I stopped trying to control a situation
or the other people, I findmiracles happen. And if somebody I have
(09:01):
on today who knows all about miraclesis my guest, Georgette van Fleet.
She is a life coach and anauthor whose books highlight how important self care
and self reflection are in attracting yourdream life. She shares your own experiences
of dealing with depression and anxiety andhow central the law of attraction is in
(09:22):
helping her heal every single day.She has inspired many many people through her
coaching practice, her books, aswell as her amazing and motivational speaking engagements
and her social media presence. Iam so very honored to have you Georgette
today. You blow me away witheverything you do and how you reach others
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with your wisdom. So welcome.Thank you, Maureen, that's a wonderful
introduction. Thank you so much.Nice to be here again with you.
I know well, I love havingyou with me, and you're just we're
kind of two pieces in a potor each side of the coin, or
you know, we get it witha lot of this energy and the crazy
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stuff that happens when but when welet go and let God and let let
the law of attraction and and andlet all that beautiful energy that's out on
the planet and focus on the good, just letting it be come to us.
Thank you summarized it all when yousaid everything we say and thinks a
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prayer. I wrote it down.What a great way to live your life.
Right before you even say anything,you're saying a prayer, and I
really think about your words and whatyou're thinking about. Thank you. It's
great today. Oh thank you.I really do believe that. But often,
being in my humanness, I willsay something and then it will dawn
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on me that I just said aprayer asking for something I really don't want.
And that's the law of attraction.And we can say, you know
our dream board and put it outthere, you write about it and meditate
on it, you pray, butyou see yourself attracting. But if we're
not aware of this as we walkthrough life, that we're everything we're doing
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is either bringing that to us.We're bringing the other thing to us or
nothing. We're stale because we're confusingthe energy. We're confused. God's like,
okay, enough, you know.I have tried to communicate, I've
tried to make this very clear.They're not picking up on it. So
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I feel like in the last especiallylately, because I've been doing so much
work around this for years and tryingto understand my own frustrations and my own
depression. I think lately, whatI've realized about the law of attraction the
beauty is to want something, butto also be so grateful for what you
are to have. And I thinkthat's where people trip up, like I
really want this, but we haveto remember we have a lot. You
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know, you have a lot inyour life. Your life is wonderful.
It's okay to want more, butit's also important to be grateful for what
you have. I think that reallyeases us into you know, the beauty
of you know, attracting what wewant. Yeah, and sometimes I feel
like the word gratitude isn't big enoughfor what I have in my life,
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and it's really about relationships and people. It's not the things. The things
are a nice little add on,but you know, once you have your
things that you've set out there toget, you're gonna want other things,
and that the things never end,and then it becomes stuff we have to
get rid of. And even moreso than people and relationships, even just
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being in complete awe that you cansee, that you can hear, that
you can move your hands, thatyou can walk, like just everything that
we take for granted all day longabout our bodies and our minds. If
you really, if you really stopto think about it, you would be
an awe. You'd be amazed atthe incredible all your abilities all day long
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that we just assume you wake up, you jump out of bed, you
go to work, and drive yourcar. Those are all amazing things to
think about and to be grateful for. Yeah, and we are. And
if we don't stay focused on onon what the possibilities are and and what
is it that really fills our souls, we don't kind of really connect to
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that you have talked about, youknow, the energy around asking yourself loads
of questions, like just constantly,you know, pouring in the questions that
move you forward rather than the questionsof like move us back or failure or
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why me? The pathetic perth andstory victimhood. I have to say I
was the queen of victimhood, noton purpose. I didn't know any better.
I didn't know. I was thequeen of why why? And And
you're right, it doesn't move youforward. It just keeps you stuck in
a little circle and you have noanswers and no solutions. And I think
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one of the when I was atmy worst really with depression and feeling like
why is my life so stuck?Why can't I why do I feel so
unlucky, you know, and askingmyself the question what makes me happy?
Like what do I want? Andrealizing I had never asked myself that before,
and so of course my life.Of course, I wasn't feeling fulfilled.
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I didn't know what I wanted,you know, it's a you know,
I was on a call yesterday witha group of women and and we
were talking about what we want andgetting very clear and you know, setting
our goals. And it was likea goal setting call and and are just
really getting clear about what you want, like one thing you really want,
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And one of the women, who'sa little older, it was like she
responded with I don't really know whatI want. I've achieved X, Y
and Z, and I don't eventhink you have to be older to get
to this place. You can beyou know, forty and being well,
I've done all this. I'm amom, and I'm doing this. I
always wanted to be a mom,but I never thought about beyond that,
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or I wanted the you know,my relationship to be like this. But
things are a little stale now,or there's things we're not communicating clearly,
or we're trying. But where doyou what energizes the the clarity around the
intention. It's a great question,and I think what you said earlier,
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it's that conflicting energy, like whoam I to ask for more? Right?
I have a beautiful home, Ihave a family. Who am I
to ask for more? Or theguilt you feel about wanting more being ambitious.
I think a lot of us strugglewith that, and I think that
that's why it's so important to beable to say I'm so blessed I have
my family, or I have mygreat job or whatever it is that you
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have, like feeling really blessed aboutwhat you have and also being excited to
have more, like being okay withthat, being okay to ask for whatever
is it you want and really understandingthat's where the inspiration is. The energy
comes when you're excited and you're lookingforward to something. And I know you
and I have talked about this withour business, like I love what I
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do, Like this gives me somuch energy and passion. If I weren't
doing it, I do think apart of me would die. So that's
where I think people have to getclear, like don't feel guilty that you
want more, don't worry about otherpeople not having or what's happening in someone
else's life. That's their journey,that's their story. But you need you
need to be okay with asking formore or asking for what you want and
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then going for it and having noguilt. Yeah. Yeah, because we
can't fix anybody else. We can'tchange what anybody else would anyone and be
our children, our spouses, ourparents, our neighbors. We cannot change
what they want, what they think, what they do with nothing. We
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can guide, but we cannot changeanything. And it's so easy to get
caught up in the anger. Likethe story I had with that woman,
I was bewildered as to why isthis is an attack on me? But
it wasn't an attack on me.Something had happened to her, something wasn't
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right, And if I had reallydamaged the car, I'm sure she would
have unleashed on me. So butit was just I was easy tag to
do that, and I think totake and turn it around as I did,
just to be open. And Ithink that's what happened, was that
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I was like, okay, handingthis back to this person. And that's
what we have to do when weget out there and we want to find
what energizes us. I know youtold me the story story earlier, and
I loved when you told me thestory that you prayed for them because they
needed it prayer, Like, nobodywants to be that angry. That's no
way that nobody could be happy livingtheir life with that much anger. So
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I thought it was great that yousaid a prayer. But I also think
and I love that you put thisup because here's where I know, for
me, my energy has been drainedfor years. I would have thought about
that and focused on that, Whywhy'd that happen? That's not where you
want to put your energy. Likefor you, you were going to a
writing workshop, you had to focuson writing or for me when things like
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that happened happened this morning with thework situation. If I focus on that,
I wouldn't have the energy to talkto you. But another way that
I am. So it's really thinkingabout, well do I have control over
this? If the answer is no, what can I focus on what's important
to me? And that's where youdirect your energy. That's that's beautiful because
I know that what you're referencing withwork, and that's a miracle. Like
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even the miracle for me in themoment was when that when other woman got
out of the car and and shewas like, oh, are you here
for the writer's workshop? I waslike yes. So then my game I
was. I was back. ButI had to give I had to give
up the prayers. I had togive up the energy to back to the
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other people or back to that otherwoman and and just trust that that was
taken care of. And that immediatelyopened up for me. I mean,
she could have parked somewhere else,It could have been another situation, or
you could have maybe maybe years passedbefore you did all this work. This
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would have been me years ago.This beautiful woman would have gotten out of
the car and instead of enjoying themoment, I'd be like, let me
tell you what just happened to me, And I would have and I would
have gushed this negativity even just sayingthat I can feel the energy, and
it probably would have ruined my weekend. Right, So right to do this
work. Right, Doing this workand understanding energy and focus really helps you.
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Like you said, you said aprayer, you'll let it go.
Someone came in and filled it withbeautiful and I will be on it.
I will be honest because when Idid see her and she did say,
I said, oh, I justhad something very jarring happened to me,
and it's so nice to meet you. But I did touch on it,
so it wasn't like I could letit go completely. And it definitely it
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took. But this is it's aprocess. It really is a process.
So what are some other questions wecan ask ourselves to get to that place?
So I love obviously, what doyou want? And if I if
someone doesn't know what they want?Like for me, I journaled that question
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every day for about six months,what do I want? One? And
I allowed whatever I wanted to flowon the paper like I just allowed myself
to be. So that's a reallygood question to really focus on. And
it's okay if it changes. It'sokay. If you say what do I
want today and tomorrow, it's different. In the next day, it's different
because what your mind is doing foryou is sifting and sorting. It's helping
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you get to the place of clarity. You may not happen right away.
So like if I were somebody thatwere practicing this, I would have fun
with it. I would just writeplan I would write every Yeah, I
would just write every day with funand the idea of it's you know,
if it changes, that's okay.I'm learning about myself. I'm learning about
what I want. And maybe evenwhen you're writing that you might this happened
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to me, happens to a lotof people. You remember something that you
enjoy doing When you were a childthat used to love to write poetry.
I forgot that. I still loveto so I still love to sell.
Like so there are things about usthat we may have suppressed and forgotten.
So that's a really great question.And of course what will make me happy,
like just knowing what will make mehappy, And for a lot of
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us, we expect our spouse tomake us happy. We want our children
to make us happy. It's youknow, we've got to get to the
substance of ourselves. Like I loveto read, that makes me happy,
or I love to cool for walksthat makes me happy. And I talk
about this a lot. I'm nottalking about shopping. You know a lot
of times we do things that arenot that you don't need to go shopping,
but it's about substance, like whatfills you, like really getting to
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the core of what fills you.Yeah, then what dar isn't going to
necessarily fail you? Right right?Yeah, Like you said before, you
know things, things, things,and I love things. Don't get me
wrong. I love to go shopping, but I know now that that's not
where I look for fulfillment. Iknow that's not going to because, like
you said, if I get aJaguar, I'm gonna want a Ferrari or
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whatever it. Maybe if I govacation here, I want to go there,
And that's great. Those are allgreat, But about fulfillment and about
happiness and joy that I'm looking forin my life all day long. I
don't want it to be fleeting,like, oh this might be happy for
a minute. Then you know,how can I be up of the down?
The up of the down? Andand that's why I call these miracles
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because when you do finally like clickinto oh gosh, I used to sew,
I think I'm going to try tosew something. Or I used to
snow snow. I used to sew. I used to play in the snow.
Being from the Midwest, um ice, skate and and knit um and
so those are those things do bringme joy. I might not be any
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good at them anymore, but toyou know, get a little frustrated,
but to actually connect the things weused to do, yeah, because they
kind of they build on who webecome. And now I have to look
at people who talk about, well, I don't know what to do as
a career and blah blah blah,I want to change my career. A
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lot of women I friends of mineand women that connected with they're they're kind
of lost and where they what theywant to create and they and this is
where clarity gets really funky. Andas I have worked through this too,
I know you have also. Itkind of comes from what where we started
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in life? What were the thingswe like to do? What were the
things we like to do with peoplelike to be helpers, we like to
be of service, we like toto listen to stories, we like to
tell stories. And you're a fantasticwriter. Georgette is a fantastic writer.
She's also a credible editor. She'sedded things in mind, but she's so
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connecting back to this the things weused to like to do, but then
they become broader because we become broader, right, and there are some things
you can't do, like my I'mnot going to roller blade again. I'm
not going to take that chance offalling, you know, like I love
to rollerblade. So it's also thatchange too, like as you age,
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you know, what are you what'srealistic? What are you willing to do?
And I think a lot of whatwe're talking about, like getting connected
to yourself, it really happens inthe quietude, like the silence which a
lot of us if we have families, if you're busy jobs, if we're
commuting, we don't have much ofthat. So even like your prayer again,
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prayer, it's a quietness within you. It's you know, it's just
finding time to really connect to that. And I know that one of the
biggest things I talk about a lotin my workshops, into my books.
It's going for a walk and likelistening to the birds chirping, feeling the
breeze on your face, like reallyconnecting with the simplicity of life that a
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lot of us forget. Right,how many times do we with all that
is? And that is that isthat quiet within is also the quiet without,
and that is God energy, thatis God, that is the all
of creation, what was created andnot you know, and like keeping busy,
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busy, busy. I now lookand moms and even you know,
just women who are working all thetime, or for mommies, whatever it's
we're always busy. We're taking careof the animals. We talked about that
now they can just take over lotsof your time and energy. Our children
take over time and energy. Andeven when they grow up and they've gone
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and they're living their own lives,we're still thinking about them. We're still
thinking about, well, does Juniorstill do this? Does he still does
he miss my macaroni and cheese?Does he? You know? Whatever?
It just you know, it's afascinating life. It's fascinating. But also
like that also takes the focus awayfrom you. It's very easy for us
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as women to think about everything elsebut ourselves because it's not we don't know
how to do it, so it'suncomfortable if you haven't practiced. And I
think a lot of women feel like, well, that's selfish. I don't
want to be sad. It's nowherenear selfish to focus on your dreams and
your goals. It doesn't mean you'reever going to neglect your children, even
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if they're grown, or your husbandor the fur baby. Like you know,
it's just about us making some spaceto be able to feel and to
be able to connect to who weare. And you know, you say
you talk about God. I believein God, and I've spent a lot
of time alone in the last fewyears really trying to connect to myself,
feeling disconnected and trying to connect andwhatever the word people want to use,
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the universe. Spirit. Boy,when you spend time alone, you realize
God is right here, like yourintuition, your ability to us to feel
things internally is so strong if youallow yourself to feel it, if you
build in that time. And it'suncomfortable in the beginning, spending time alone
in the beginning. To me,it was like my skin was crawling.
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I wanted to do something and callsomeone, but I forced myself to do
it and I once I worked throughthat and I was my nervous system calmdown.
Boy. It was the most peaceful, beautiful place that I can talk
into now any time I want to. That's beautiful. And you can do
that at any on and off duringthe day, just to connect with that,
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and when you do, you realizethat's what you come from. That's
where we started. That's really willnessand hopefully and to know of it and
to know that for the rest ofmy life, I never have to ask
anyone else, what do you thinkof this? I can. All I
have to do is stop and askmyself and I get the answer, Like
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I no longer have to look outsideof myself for anything. And that's what
a strength and calm do you wantto where you comefidence comes from. That's
that's where your confidence comes from.And knowing you for years now, I
want to acknowledge you and that isI have seen you grow in confidence and
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it's beautiful and it's exactly you dothe work. You do your work,
you do exactly what you talk aboutyou talk about like making really big changes
in one's life, and they canbe big, small, any kind of
changes, but it starts with thesteps of moving forward and taking the time
to go within. And I knowfor me, my big issue is often
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looking towards the people I love inmy life to validate my very existence,
to tell me I'm doing something well, or to see me as something.
You know that I think they justautomatically through osmosis should know. And that's
not fair to them, and it'snot fair to me to be constantly grabbing
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him that. That's been an internalbattle for years. Yeah, And I
find that when I when you learnhow to do this, when you really
spend time alone and you and youget you get really real with yourself and
you know who you are, youknow what you want, you know,
you learn how to make yourself happy. All of a sudden, the marriage
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gets better, all of a sudden, the relationship with your children gets better,
all of a sudden, everything getsbetter. And if something has to
go, like if you have tomove or maybe if the marriage does have
to end, at least you've donethe work on yourself. I think the
hardest thing for me is a lifecoach is to watch people say I'm unhappy,
I'm going to get divorced, Well, you know, to automatically blame
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the marriage or to blame anyone beforeyou do the work on yourself and say,
well, how you know, what'smy partner? What can I do
first? What can I look atin my life? What can I fix?
What's even small changes can I makewithin my own sphere before I make
a big decision like that? AndI think that that's a huge one for
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me if I can get that acrossto people. More than anything, Before
you change the job, before youchange the relationship, work on yourself,
because when you feel good, everythingchanges everything. It's a miracle. That's
the miracle too. And I knowI've talked about this a lot years ago.
In my deep depression when you metme and I could barely talk,
I was like this. I thoughtmy marriage was stinky. I didn't I
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wasn't happy with my life. AsI did the work on myself, everything
has improved. I have a greatmarriage, I have a great relationship with
my son, who you just sawagain for the first time in years.
And I told you today my worksituation is great, like so many things
I've shifted and nothing changed but me. So sometimes we're the traffic gem,
right, Sometimes it's us, andI can look at myself and laugh and
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be like, all right, you'rethe one. You know, you're the
one that's been toxic at times.You know, I'm the one that needed
to change and grow. And it'sbeen wonderful, because it's been wonderful because,
like you said earlier, with theone and being so angry, that
could have been me. That couldeasily have been me if I didn't do
this work, and you know,could be any of us, and actually
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probably has been any of any andall of us throughout our lives, the
choices we make, the anger wehave around our children sometimes, or somebody's
doing something wrong to our kids.I mean, god knows, if something
really horrific, you have every rightto lose your mind. But if it's
you know, another, you know, another small, a small situation,
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it's it's a matter of just doinga check on yourself and where you're at.
You have to do the inner work, find the peace within before you
can actually make a really big difference. And that ping being the ping,
as I call it, the perfectI like that the pebble in the water
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you and if we all become thepebble in the water or the pin,
that vibration goes out from us andeverything else around you starts to change.
And I've had some stuff recently inmy life, which we'll talk about in
a later podcast. But where miraclesare, they just keep happening. And
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the more I talk about, themore I announce that, I declare it.
Miracles are happening in my life constantly. Now. They really are just
things I never thought would be resolved, things I never thought could be possible.
Things I thought were ending are notending. It's me that has changed,
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and it's the pin. And ifwe could look at the pin.
I love that if all of uscan look at the pin, Like the
minute you're upset with someone and youlook at it as a ping, won't
it change what you're going to say? Like maybe you were about to yell
at someone or tell them off,maybe you would help you say it a
nicer way or a more constructive way, in a more loving way, to
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be building relationships and to be spreadingpositivity and support to people. Like if
you could just see that everything's aripple, how much that would affect the
way you respond to any situation.I love that love. It's love,
it's joy, and yes, ofcourse on the you know, emotional scale,
we're going to feel everything because we'rehumans and we're just going to feel
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you know, rage, anger,joy, happiness, love. You know,
we're going to go through the wholething. But it is toxic when
we're not trying to move, dothe work. And so when a woman,
let's when you know a mom's areso busy, or when you know
grandmothers are exhausted because they're also they'rehelping, as I know, helping with
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kids and working and doing everything wedo and just trying to get through life.
And then there is also of likelife stuff happening. Where do you
begin how do you fit it intoyour life? Well, I love what
you just said about miracles happening everywhere. I forgot exactly how you say.
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You have to write that down inthe chat box, right, But that's
not It starts with affirmations like that. It starts with like you said that
it felt so good and that's somethingthat I want to write down because what
I do is I'll write that downand I'll say that all day long.
It's really about us building our beliefsystem in ourselves about believing that you know
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that life is a miracle, thatlife is joy, that there's love everywhere.
It's just you know, so thatno matter what's happening, no matter
how upset you may be, Likefor me, I know you were just
happening before. I'm always doing this. Love love, love. I see
love in this situation because I canbe so angry, right, but if
I do this, I see lovein the situation. No matter what the
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situation is, I can find abetter solution. And then yelling, raising
my voice telling someone up, whichby the way, I haven't done in
years. I just don't live mylife like that anymore, you know,
Thank goodness. It makes me feelgood. But it all starts with this.
It all starts with being able tostop yourself. And yeah, that
that too. Like the other day, something a memory came up and it
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was such a trigger about not beingsupported and I was like, no,
no, no, we're not goingthere, We're not going the right minute
I was able to tap. Andthen the next thing I do is so
I was feeling unsupported, something happened, I was feeling unsupported. But the
next thing I do is say,of course you're supported. Again in affirmation,
of course you're supported. And Ithink of all the people in my
(36:42):
life have supported me, maybe andI'll feel it today, but I've had
support my entire life, my grandparents, I can think of beautiful memories,
friends, you have supported me,like you've supported me so like so different
directions, right, And is ittrue like when you're feeling those negative when
you're getting angry, when you're gettingupset, like to stopping up? Is
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it really true? Like? Isit like really is it true that no
one likes as a coach, wewill call I love it, They want
to date, no one loves me. It's not really true. Your mother
wants you, right, even ifshe's past, she loves you, your
father, your puppy, whatever.There's love everywhere. There's support everywhere,
And so even does not feel goodeven saying it, and it just it
does. It does because our ancestorssupport us. They're on the other side.
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God supports us, Jesus supports us. They support us. But you
were so caught up in this worldwe're in that we get our heads clouded
over with the words coming at us. And that so something that I continue
to work on and just once you'reyour reflection on this UM. I find
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that as I listen more than talk, although on a podcast I talk more
than I should sometimes, but tworeally hear what someone is saying and not
think about the next thing I'm goingto say. It's beautiful. I have
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to work on that as well.It's to work out. Definitely have to
work in it as well. Idid want to say though, that just
back to the other comment, likesomething like you just said, like we
get frustrated with life and its life, but if you really think about it,
what are you frustrated about? Solike, sometimes when I get upset
about like I've gained weight and it'sI get frustrated about that. I'm like,
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how did I let this happen?But then when I think about it,
Okay, so that's the only thingthat's bothering you right now, That's
okay. Like sometimes we think theweight gain is everything, but in the
big picture, it's really not.If every other things are going well in
your life, focused on those things, you know, you can try to
lose weight. We're done it,But to make it the center of your
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frustration or your angst, I think, and maybe that would help us all
listen better too. That's a reallygood with which we didn't have so much
angst. Right if we could justlook, it's okay, everything's okay.
Right, to just make peace withit all, Yeah, and to work
on things. It's okay that Ihave to lose some weight, It's okay.
It's okay that I'm still working withmy business and building it's okay.
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But yeah, like peace with everythingelse, that's you know what. Yeah,
And actually the gratitude around the thestuff, the crap that doesn't work,
to be grateful for how it showsup, why it shows up,
how it shows up, and howit's not going to be given that much
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of a light anymore. And alsoto kind of like I love to say
to God, like, all right, what do you want me to learn
here? But something's not working outas fast as I wanted to. It
means it's a little there's more.There are more life lessons in this.
So whatever it is that I'm strugglingwith has taught me so much, you
know, there's so much to learn. And so if something isn't working out
(40:13):
yet, if I don't have exactlywhat I want, I'm still working at
it. So therefore I'm still learning, I'm still growing, right, So
it's just love it. Yeah,it's just all about like, okay,
like I'm meant to learn more here. And I do believe that whether it's
you want to meet your soulmate orwhatever, or you want to you're working
on a relationship, whatever, maybewhen you finally get whatever you're meant to
(40:37):
learn, it's it's those it's thatpain, right, it's an aha moment
of ah, now things are goingto come together. So we're just growing
and learning and you know, workinghopefully all of us are working at pulling
it all together to feel successful,love and whatever it is that we want.
And you know success, who knowswhat success is? Success, it's
(41:00):
really love, it's joy, it'shappiness. It's it's not allowing the crazy,
crazy distractions of life to pull usaway, because that, to me
is almost demonic, you know whatI mean? Like, I find that
(41:21):
with those distractions are the you know, for better term, is the devil
pulling us away from our true essence. Is the energy, the negative energy
pulling us away from who we trulyare, which is love and light.
And I agree with you and ifthat is absolutely the definition of success when
(41:45):
you like when you I'm sorry,I just thought of something I wanted to
say it earlier. We should alwaysbe seeking the light, right, Like
we should always be like, nomatter what's happening, you're frustrated or angry,
whatever negative emotions, seek the light, like what you know, how
can you make it better? Alwaysgo towards the light. I always think
about that with God and just thatenergy of you know, but um,
(42:07):
I just also by train and thoughtI wanted to say something. Um yeah,
but it's like that that energy thatpulls us away from them, right
right, So back to success,right back to the like, you've got
to feel good about yourself. Youhave to know and be confident that you're
living your life ethically, you're nothurting anyone. You know, you're you're,
(42:29):
you're, you're, you're feeling goodabout yourself. Whatever it is that
you're doing, whatever you're, whateveryou're whatever, whatever the work is that
you do or whatever that you're you'redoing the right thing. And I think
that's success. I think that's whenpeople if you know that nothing else will
affect you, that ripple, likethat demonic stuff won't affect you. I
love that, Thank you. Ithink that secrets are the big thing that
(42:54):
pull people away from their true essence. And you know they say, oh,
I just a little white lie.I've done this little thing here and
I we all do it, weall do them. Not everybody has to
know. Are you know some ofour secrets? But the big secrets that
affect other people and how we treatothers, how we treat ourselves, needs
(43:17):
to be addressed. Yeah, Andit's also that that's a detached detachment.
That's like you're just pushing people.You're not connecting when you're when you're living
secrets and not they have to telleverybody everything. But I know exactly what
you mean, like like if acknowledgethem for yourself, right, it's true.
And also just you're not detachment,that's the wrong word. When you
(43:40):
don't share with someone, you're notconnecting, Like you know, our lives
were meant to be connected and supportone another. So if you're trying to
do something alone, if you're inshame or whatever, you're not connecting with
people. You're pushing them away,and that makes it worse. That's even
that brings more negativity. So sometimesI think you when you connect, you
(44:00):
just feel so good. You know, it just feel so good to you
know, to self connect, justconnect by soul and just find that way
or award and releasing the negativity.So when do you when now you're still
you still journal every day, whendo you tell your clients or when do
(44:23):
you recommend journaling? Is it firstthing in the morning, or is it
whenever you're feeling it throughout the day, or is it before you go to
bed at night, or is itall those times you can beay, it's
all those times for me journaling.I started journaling with Julia Cameron's The Artist's
Way Beautiful, you know, themorning pages. So I've been doing it
in the morning for many, manyyears, but there have definitely been times
(44:46):
when I journal in the afternoon,in the evening. It depends on what
I need. So there was atime, like a couple of years ago,
when I was going through a reallydifficult time, very very difficult,
and I had no confidence in myself, is completely depleted, and I needed
to journal every afternoon. Like Iwould every afternoon I would make a list
of all the things I thought aboutmyself, like you're not good enough,
(45:08):
you're this, you're that, likeall these I had so much negativity,
and then I would sit and writethe opposite in the second column, and
I would do that. I didthat for a long time. Like that
was a beautiful practice for me,back to the affirmations of like consistently saying
you're good enough. You know,I choose happiness. Of course I can
have what I want or whatever Iwrote, just really retraining my brain to
(45:31):
believe in myself and to know thatI was worthy. So I had to
do a lot of work around that. And then some people at to journal
at night because it goes into itsets into their subconscious. They could dream
about it and visualize it in theirdreams. That's wonderful too. So many
ways to journal, but you haveto be consistent. Whatever you choose,
you should do it every day orevery other day, whatever you can do
(45:53):
right right. And it doesn't haveto be a dissertation. It can be
a one minute blip, salute ly. I mean for me it was a
little bit longer because I had toplour out all this stuff. I had
to get all of this out ofme. If you don't feel that way,
if you're just journal and just tofigure out what you want and it's
simple, that's fine. Too.You want to make a list. That's
(46:14):
no one has to look at yourjournal. There's no judgment. You do
it your way. But it hasto feel good to you. You have
to like when you're done journally,feel them smiling. It has to feel
good. Now. I know alot of people, or I read many
places that it's great to you know, you write your purge, you get
it all out of you. Youkeep writing and writing and writing. And
you know, some of us livein homes where people might look at our
(46:37):
journals or might you know, wemight leave it out because we're busy and
things. So I've heard, youknow, taking and not rereading what you've
written, just letting it because you'vereleased it, and then ripping the pages
up and out. You can burnthem and send them to heaven or whatever,
(46:58):
or I don't know them in thebackyard. But do you have a
feeling around what one does with thejournal when they're kind of moved through?
I do. I journaled for many, many years and it was all a
dump. I hate myself, Ihate the way I look. I'm at
at my mother. I can't believethis happen. And then one day I
was like, this is not gettingme anywhere. So I stopped journaling anything
(47:19):
negative. Anybody can come in myhouse and read my journals. They're all
about my ambition, about my goals. So I've taken all that energy and
turned it into what do I want? Like what do you know? What
do I And I've just stopped complainingin my journals. It just and again,
you can do whatever you want.You can burn it, you can
throw it in the garbage. Iused to soak them in water so nobody
(47:40):
could read it and throw it out. But I have to say that when
I stopped doing that and started focusingon solutions, what do I want?
What makes me happy? My journalingit got very very It got more educational
for me, like it really becamesomething like, oh like therapy, like
therapy exactly. And also back tothat intuitiveness, like when I spend time
(48:04):
alone and I learned that God waswithin me and I would allow myself to
write whatever I wanted. My intuitionwas spelling things out for me, so
it was beautiful. It was beautiful, like an automatic writing experience. You
just let flow and it's a beautifuland there's a there's a you know,
typing it isn't the same as lettinggo from your head down your arm into
(48:27):
your hand to write with the kinesthetic. So hopefully believe that. I totally
believe that some of a lot ofpeople they talk into their phones and that's
how they journal. I'm not bigon rereading. Sometimes I am big on
it, but I really don't wantto reread what I've purged. I want
to move through it and just releaseit. I love the idea of soaking
(48:51):
it. I've actually torn it upand burned it before. I think it's
great to just let it go andlet God. And then I love the
positivity piece because I think we haveI know that I've had to clear it
out and then start working on amore positive or change the discussion within my
(49:13):
writing, and the discussion is meand God, me and me, me
and you know whomever I'm having stuffwith, but really changing it to a
more positive outlook. Because for tenyears I would about I want to lose
weight. I didn't do it,you know what I mean? Like I
was writing the same things over andover, like the dump, and then
I realized, I'm just dump.I'm not fixing it was. I wasn't
(49:35):
doing anything. It wasn't moving meforward. So I'm not saying you should
never dump. Sometimes you do haveto dump sometimes, you know. I
haven't done it recently, but I'vehad to scream. I've had to go
and like my car and let itout when I'm driving, or maybe I've
said things in my car that noone can hear that I just need to
helpfully do it. But as faras writing it, I started to really
(49:57):
shift it to what do I want? What entered drives me. I could
really get moved in that direction becausethere was no movement before that. I
wasn't even taking when I was inmy deep depression, I couldn't even take
small steps. It helped me moveforward. So that's kind of where that's
been my how I've been joining forthe past ten years now. That is
fantastic. And it's also about whatyou don't want right and when you're write
(50:20):
right, this is I don't wantto do this anymore. I don't want
to be negative anymore. I don'twant to be complaining anymore. I don't
want to hate my husband anymore.I don't want to hate you know,
whatever, whatever it is that you'reworking through. Well, as we close
today, I want all our listenersto know where they can find you,
where they can find your books.A little bit about your books, because
they really are powerful. Little thankyou. Yes, my books are.
(50:45):
They're on Amazon, but they're alsoon my website, which is my name
georget Endlei dot com. That's alsomy social media handle. I post videos
everyday, motivational videos on Instagram andFacebook and TikTok. And my books are
about obviously, they started with myjourney when I was in my deepest depression.
I became a self help guru.I really just devoured anything I could
(51:06):
and learned and practiced. So mybooks are about the habits and the skills
that you need because I think whenI was in my deepest depression, I
had no skills to get out ofit. I didn't know how to get
out of it. I had noidea. And a lot of the stuff
in my books, too, isabout learning to communicate because I've been married
for twenty five years and I knowwe've had this conversation and I had no
(51:27):
idea how to communicate with someone.I had no idea. Besides, Aha,
everything's great, but when things gotcomplicated, right mortgage children, It's
like what do you do now?And you know, like most marriages,
there's a lot of silence in ourhome because no one he didn't know how
to communicate either, and learning howto be able to say, you know
what, I don't know how tosay what I need to say? Can
you just hear me out and let'slet me say what I need to say
(51:50):
without judgment, and just learning howto talk to each other. So it's
really about those skills and those habitsthat we need to feel good about ourselves.
That's sort of all my books sortof bound, and they're all e
books are simple, they're quick becauseI know when I was in the height
of my depression, even though Iwanted to read a three hundred page book,
I couldn't. That wasn't happening,So yeah, right right, I
just try to keep them like afifty pages quick clip. You know.
(52:13):
Rights that's great because they know thatthey helped so many people. And I'm
again so grateful to have you ontoday. And um, we'll definitely have
another bigger conversation around another piece ofintentions and wellness. So if everybody given
(52:34):
me take a moment, just perfecteyes, big rap
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