September 23, 2025 • 37 mins
On this episode of The Rewrite, I’m joined by @zenfully.aware, Crystal Carnahan—Regenerative Practitioner, coach, and founder of Zenfully Aware. After leaving a 22-year marriage, Crystal booked a one-way ticket to Dubai and never looked back. Her solo travels across six continents became more than a journey—they became a rite of passage, a healing portal, and a path to what she calls the “divorce afterglow.”
In our conversation, Crystal shares:
-How solo travel can become a sacred rite of passage after divorce
-Why grief and growth can exist side by side
-How regenerative travel restores both self and place
This episode is about rewriting your story, reclaiming your wholeness, and stepping into your next chapter with courage and curiosity.
Follow Crystal:https://www.instagram.com/zenfully.aware
http://linkedin.com/in/crystal-carnahan-979b74115
https://zenfullyaware.com/
In our conversation, Crystal shares:
-How solo travel can become a sacred rite of passage after divorce
-Why grief and growth can exist side by side
-How regenerative travel restores both self and place
This episode is about rewriting your story, reclaiming your wholeness, and stepping into your next chapter with courage and curiosity.
Follow Crystal:https://www.instagram.com/zenfully.aware
http://linkedin.com/in/crystal-carnahan-979b74115
https://zenfullyaware.com/
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to The Rewrite, a podcast about divorce, choice and
new beginnings. I'm your host Wendy Sloan, former TV producer,
mom of two and one sweet golden retriever. This is
a space for real talk about the moments that break us,
the choices that define us, and the power we have
to begin again. You'll hear personal stories, heartfelt insights, and
(00:22):
honest conversations about healing relationships and reclaiming your life one
choice at a time. I'll be joined by experts in divorce, finance,
mental health, wellness and more and everything you need to
support your next chapter. The most powerful chapters might be
the ones you write next. Let's begin your rewrite together.
This episode is brought to in part by the Needle
(00:44):
Kuda Law Firm guidance that moves lives forward.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Welcome back to the Rewrite. I'm your host Wendy Sloan
and my guest today is the founder of zenfully Aware
Coaching and creator of the Arise Method. She is a
regenerative prep regetative pert practitioner who helps women transform divorce
into a right of passive passage through solo travel, somatic healing,
(01:09):
and mindful reinvention. Guiding women to embrace what she calls
the divorce afterglow. How much do I love that? A
chance to grieve glow and reclaim themselves while exploring the
healing power that comes with it. I am so excited
for this interview. Welcome to my show, Crystal Carnahan.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Thanks. Can we just talk about.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Yeah, I'm so happy to have you. Can we just
talk about the divorce afterglow? That got me right there?
I was like, wow, we've done I've done a lot
of interviews recently about somatic healing, SO and mindfulness. So
you are right in line with what the rewrite and
my brand and everything else. But there's so much to
(01:55):
talk about with you. There's We're going to talk about
divorce travel as solo as a way to heal ruptured
and identity loss, reclaiming solo travel as a right of
passive passage power hold grief, growth and global collapse without
numbing out as you navigate your own separation and divorce
(02:15):
and regetative well being and tourism. So this is just
so interesting to me. But I want to back up
and first start with your own personal story.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Yeah, and you know, thank you so much for the
opportunity to tell my story. Uh it is, you know,
I think everyone's story is so unique, and mine really
I think started before I went to college. My parents
got divorced. That was the I feel like the true
(02:51):
rupture that I wasn't able to to really graph the
the gravity of it. And when they got divorced, I
slid basically downhill. It was my senior year of high school.
I did go to college. I was able to spend
a couple of years in Europe, which was, you know,
(03:12):
which was absolutely amazing. And when I got back to
to the States, you know, I graduated and then as
I was trying to figure out what I was going
to do after college, Mom kind of kicked me off
for payroll, said, okay, you have a degree, now, you know,
find find your own way to pay your own way
(03:35):
in the world. And that was, you know again, it
was one of those things where a time in your
life where you just don't know what you want to do.
So I went into the restaurant industry. I lived in
Atlanta for a few years and I remember specifically we
(03:58):
had a lot of corporate people that would come in
and one of the guys is like, you know what
he's like, don't ever work in corporate. He's like, is
it will suck the life out of you. And to
this day I don't know whether that just stuck, But
to this day I have never worked in corporate, but
I did stay in the restaurant industry. And when my
(04:20):
mom passed away about four years after college, I was
twenty five, again just in that, you know, not prepared
for that real trauma of someone who you just you know,
I always said I couldn't imagine living without her, and
(04:42):
then when you have to, it just becomes a whole
other becomes a whole other world. So since I was
in the restaurant business, I used what was available, which
is alcohol, and I did that well, and then you know,
(05:02):
that was something where you could get away with it.
The restaurant business is a lifestyle and it's absolutely amazing.
I don't I don't regret it at all. Yet I
just had not handled anything for the emotional after effects
of what had happened in my life, and so alcohol
became that numbing issue when I I guess the final
(05:27):
straw was that I had legal issues. I had you know,
the whole gamut of what can happen with alcohol and
I actually I lived in a resort town. I was working,
I was filling water bottles with street vodka and I
got in an accident and this four family on Fourth
(05:49):
of July weekend, you know, had to deal with me
in my state. It was a whole thing. Nobody got hurt, thankfully,
but it was that that was the turning.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah, that's pretty much probably had a sober you right up.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
Yeah, at that point I had to make a decision,
you know, a real decision of do I want my life,
how do I want my life to look? And so
I I quit drinking about a month after the accident,
and that has been eleven years, I think twenty fourteen August,
(06:30):
and yeah, it's it changed my life after that, thank you. Yeah,
like it. It changed my life for sure. So I
went on to get a Master's of Health and Wellness Coaching.
I you know, completely did a one eighty, stopped drinking,
(06:53):
Masters of Health and Whiles of Coaching, got my yoga
teacher certification. But we moved down to Florida from Maryland.
Everything was again just in this transitional state. At the time,
my husband and I you know, had had gone through
(07:16):
some really tough times. And throughout that there were some
other things that had come up, and I had to
make a decision of whether I was going to stay
with him or whether we were going to separate, And
at the time, with everything that was going on, we
decided to try and work it out, and it was
(07:40):
again challenging. It's one of those where betrayal, once you
find out about it, there is a lot of healing
that has to go into it, but it's also where
you don't know what you're trying to heal from first.
You know, was it my parents divorced that, you know,
(08:00):
the alcohol that I had just numbed out my entire life?
Was it this betrayal? You know what what comes first?
And I don't think I was at a stage that
I knew exactly what where to go and what to
heal in order to really have a have a foundational
(08:31):
I guess building from a foundational aspect.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
So you were married for twenty years. What did it
take for you to finally realize it was time to leave?
And you described your divorce journey as one of like
rediscovering wholeness. What was the turning point that led you
to that and also to book a one way ticket
to Dubai.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
So we we had been together twenty two years, we
were married for twelve, and in twenty twenty three, the
beginning of twenty twenty three, I had gotten I just
told myself I had always wanted to travel, you know,
I said, like, I got the bug when I was
(09:18):
in Europe in college. And then we got together and again,
you like, life happened and we just never traveled. And
so in twenty twenty three, I was like, I want
to travel more. And I put that out to him
and I said I would love to travel and I
want to do it with you, and so how can
we start to look at what that can mean in
(09:40):
our lives? And he, of course was like, oh, yeah, okay,
sure whatever. And I said I'm going to do it
with or without you, regardless, and he's like, yeah, okay, whatever,
Like just book a ticket, and so I did, and
I just started looking at the you know, halfway around
(10:03):
the world, almost the furthest place from where we were.
I started looking, you know, at what not the cheapest ticket,
but you know, just how do I get to the
other side of the world the quickest and you know,
the least extensive. And there was a ticket to Dubai.
(10:27):
That was reasonable and I plicked book and he came
home from work that night and I said, yeah, you know,
like I booked a ticket. He was like, oh where,
I said, Dubai and he flipped out, like flipped out
on me. And I'm just sitting there and I was
like this this is the I think, beginning of the end.
(10:52):
And I said, well, I can book you a ticket.
I said, I'm going. I can book you a ticket
and you know, we can go together or you have
to decide what that looks like. I'm going anyway.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
And after after that, I started just booking tickets to
I was in say shells As in Mexico for a month,
and I just started booking tickets. After that, I was
(11:29):
in Portugal, Tanzania, Thailand, and then that was Yeah, that
was kind of the demise where it was like we
didn't even I don't think really discussed it. We just
simply knew that, yeah, something was changing and and it
(11:55):
and us was no longer us. It wasn't we weren't
a couple any longer.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
So what did you learn about yourself while traveling alone
through so many countries?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
I learned that that is exactly what I have always
wanted to do. It had been something that just lit
a fire in my soul, whether I could speak the
language or not, or whether you know I had I
literally went with no expectations to all of these countries
(12:36):
and no plans whatsoever. Yow and just I even barely
had hotels. I barely had hotel rooms. When I got there,
I would just book tickets and land and then kind
of figure it out from there. Wow, and that really
(12:58):
excited me, I.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Can imagine, pretty amazing. It's so, I mean, people think
solo travel is like before you settle down, or as
a consolation prize after a breakup. How do you reframe
it as the right of passage?
Speaker 3 (13:20):
I think it's one of those where women, especially we
get caught in these in these roles, you know, we
play the role of whatever it is, the wife, the mom,
the business woman, the ants, the whatever that role is,
(13:42):
and we never really like, we never give ourselves enough
credit to go beyond those roles. And so the right
of passage was like everyone, not not everyone, but a
lot of the people that I came in contact with
couldn't understand one why I was, why I was traveling solo,
(14:09):
and you know, a lot of the question was like
well if like where's your family, you know, like if
you are solo, like who else do you? Who else
are you connected to? And I was like what is that?
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (14:27):
You know, why is that such a poignant question for
most people? And I think that right of passage to
like really like whenen we can it doesn't like a
oh we have to do the same thing or gender
roles or anything like that, but just getting out of
(14:52):
getting out of the role that you play, the identity
the way people are relating to you in such a
way that you are literally almost like forging an entire
new identity, and you don't have to play the role
(15:13):
when you're in a different culture, in a different country
and nobody knows you. You don't have to play that
role like the mom, the business woman. You get to
be you, for whomever you want to be.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Your story is really one of profound resilience, you know,
from losing your mom at a young age twenty five young,
navigating addiction, leaving a twenty two year marriage, setting your
sights and solo journey.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
You went six continents and fourteen countries. Is that what
it was?
Speaker 3 (15:49):
I did I did.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
Really. Yeah, we're gonna We're gonna Crystal. We're gonna take
a quick break with Crystal Carnahan. She is the founder
of self Thenfully, where she has developed the Arise method.
I'm going to ask her about all of that. We'll
take a quick break for one of our sponsors. We'll
be right back. You're listening to the rewrite.
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Speaker 2 (17:28):
We're back with the rewrite. So you've been on such
a journey. When did all this? When did you found
sendfully aware and develop the arise method? Tell us about that.
Speaker 3 (17:45):
So I basically started my business right after I got
my yoga teacher certification and my health and wellness coaching
certification as well. I didn't want to be in the
restaurant business anymore. And since I had my house and
(18:07):
not on certification and my go to teacher certification and
at the time, you know, it was two seventeen or
twenty seventeen, twenty eighteen, you know, the life coaching, business
of coaching in general was blowing up, and it was
all of this, and I was like, oh, I'll just
I'll start a business. And I had started. It was
called self Wellness. And you know, throughout that I hired,
(18:31):
Oh my gosh, I hired so many, so many coaches
to learn and teach and you know, anybody who would
And I hired really good coaches, and I hired some
really bad coaches, and of course, you know, it's all
a learning experience. Throughout that evolution, I started mentally aware.
(18:53):
I was working on what I called my full performance,
and I was working with atholetes because what I know was,
you know, we had these young athletes who were fifteen sixteen,
both female and male athletes, fifteen and sixteen, that were
blowing out shoulders, blowing out elbows, blowing out needs. Their
(19:14):
entire injuries were something that a fifteen or sixteen year
old shouldn't have. And I started looking into that. You
know why, why is that? I started prospecting coaches, how
do we how do we do practice, and how do
we do sports and athletics A little bit more mindfully
putting in you know, yoga, creating these mental capacity where
(19:40):
the kids weren't so focused and and the parents weren't
so focused on you know, the kid's success, that they
could actually listen to their body, that they could actually
come back into who they were, and that again they
weren't their only identity of you know, a baseball player,
soccer player, volleyball player, whatever it was. Basketball. So I
(20:04):
started working with them, and then I had also prospected hotels,
and I really wanted the people on vacation. I've lived
in resort towns my whole entire life, and I wanted
people on vacation to really honor themselves and start either
start their journey or continue their health and wellness journey.
(20:25):
And so let's do wellness while away, right elevate the
guest experience. At that time, you know, it wasn't quite
as prolific as it is now. And I also at
that time, there were a lot of videos, and I
really thought it was important to take a class with
a live and structure instructor at the resort that you
(20:48):
could connect with and you're also connecting with so many
different people from so many different places. I mean, I've
had people in yoga classes who were from the same place,
didn't know each other, but they lived literally right across
the street from each other, and they start conversations and
then yeah, like you take that home, right, and it's
it's such a different adventure. Obviously, COVID hit everything, everything changed,
(21:16):
the world changed. But what happened was I was down
in Florida and we were able to the hotel that
I was that I was that I had a contract at.
We were able to do our yoga outside because it
was warm enough, we could be space. And I started
(21:37):
just hearing people from every you know, New York, Jersey,
everywhere up north that came down. They're like, oh my gosh,
my gin's closed. My my, my, My whole health and
well being support system is closed down. They were like,
this is so great. I can come to this hotel,
I can do yoga with with a live person, I
(21:57):
can feel comfortable because it's outside, we're spaced. You know,
this is awesome. So I started, I started prospecting other
hotels and during that I was like, how do I
how do I do a step by step process? And
(22:19):
I started looking at words, and a rise stood out
because it means to emerge. And so when we arise,
and when we emerge, we align you know, our chakra systems,
and that is our internal energetics. You know. The R
(22:39):
was then after we align all of that system the
R is, we reclaim the breath and we reconnect with
the body because we're so disconnected from the body. And
then we get to after that, we get to illuminate,
no shine a light on what does that mean to
really reclaim our breath and reconnect with our body. And
(23:01):
also then we get to innovate, you know, some different
ways that work specifically for us. The S is then
we get to source our new story, like write a
new chapter from that rite of passage from you know,
just where we were to where we're going, or where
we were to now to where we're going. And then
(23:23):
we embody all of that and we continue to evolve.
So then you would just move back to the A.
And so that came out of all of this evolution
from working with athletes, from working with the hotels, from
I've worked with you know, teachers and taught people with
(23:44):
no limbs who were doing yoga, and it it's like, yeah,
you just get the human body is so amazing, and
we have gotten so far away from it and are
innate wisdom. And when we're going through divorce and separation,
(24:09):
we're literally relating to ourselves differently. And the travel comes
into it because so many women's stories they said, no,
I've felt I feel like an island, and I started
researching island ecosystems and this is like my favorite. Island
ecosystems are diverse because of their isolation. And so if
(24:35):
we start to look at that, it's like people feel
like islands. They think they're alone, but they're really creating
their diversity so that they can work within the collective
as who they are, right, Like, yeah, they can. They
can create this amazing diversity he was in themselves. That
(25:03):
that then just spreads out to whoever they come in
contact with. So that led to you know them as
an island. Here are island ecosystems. Oh my gosh, let's
travel the world and see you know how they how
this all correlates. And then when you travel, you since
you notice you know, islands are susceptible to I mean,
(25:28):
I'm down in the Caribbean. We're we're having the sargasm
susceptible to climate change, sea level rise, you have to
literally create. There's nothing you can't go to, there's no target.
You got to get on a boat to go to
the mainland, to get in a car, to take a
(25:51):
cab to you know, it's and and how and so
if that is what does life? You know, what are
we really what are we really focusing on? And how
are we how is it all coming together and integrated
(26:12):
in a way that allows us to be fulfilled and
be who we are.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
Well, that's a lot, and you invite your clients, So
I want to talk about this a little bit as well.
To embrace the divorce after blow tell us about that.
Speaker 3 (26:38):
As I was traveling and telling my story, there were
people who didn't know how to They really didn't know
how to react. You know, it was like why are
you traveling solo? And then like oh my gosh, well
where's your family? And then you know, and I would say, oh,
well I'm getting a divorce, and I would be like,
(27:00):
there's a you know, jaw drop, there's a kind of
a what do I say? Oh sorry or congratulations? And
I was just embracing it. You know, this is this
is great, Like it's okay, there's and then people started saying, well,
(27:20):
you're glowing, and then I was like, this is the
afterglow like this, going through that rupture is devastating and
it really sucks, but I refuse to stay in that
mm and the afterglow is so much better because then
(27:42):
you get to there's no commiseration and there's no blame,
and there's no shame, and there's none of the he said,
she said, right, and this is where the work comes in, right,
And I just refused to stay in. I was in
a lot of I was looking for some sort of
(28:04):
support where I didn't have to necessarily. Friends are amazing,
and when you're going through something like this, they tend
to either want to offer help that isn't really helpful,
(28:27):
or you know, they want to commiserate. And I didn't want.
I didn't want I don't want misery loves company. I wanted.
I wanted uplifting. And so some of the groups that
I had joined were, you know, very supportive for the
(28:47):
people who needed a space to vent and maybe relive
some of their trauma, and that is just not what
was working for me. There's nothing wrong. These spaces are available,
(29:09):
and I'm glad that people can go to them, but
I needed something different. I needed something where we were
moving forward. We were saying, okay, this happened, now now
what are we using from it? How are we moving forward?
How are we getting better and living our lives like
(29:31):
thriving within our lives, not simply staying stuck in that muck.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
You talk about holding grief, growth and even global collapse
without numbing out. How do you personally practice that?
Speaker 3 (29:57):
I do a lot. There is a lot of there's
a lot of breath breath work. I continue to practice yoga.
There's a lot of somatic aspects of really asking my body,
(30:19):
listening to my body, where am I tensing? And what?
You know, if it's my shoulders or my neck or
my throat, or even if it's the right side versus
the left side, what do those mean? You know? Like
your right side you know you or your left side
you're comin inside your masculine side? Am I trying to control?
(30:43):
Or am I not receiving?
Speaker 2 (30:45):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (30:45):
You know, even as it goes through, what do I
want for dinner? But really listening to the body, I
you know, it's eating with food and with nourishment. It's
not mess necessarily about like, oh, you can't have this
or you can't have that. Food is very neutral, but
(31:07):
what activates and makes you feel alive in the moment,
and also why are you eating what you're eating. So
there's a journaling again, reflecting every conversation, every every person
I meet, every person that I am that I have
(31:31):
to relate to in a certain way. Is very intentional.
And people are like, oh, well, you know, and I'm
on you know, I'm in a tourist town, I'm on
an island. But I do believe that the energy pulls
(31:52):
people in and repels people, and so I'm just no
longer in spaces that I used to be. I guess
we'll say that I And so therefore the people who
(32:13):
are in those spaces, and again this is not anything wrong,
Like they're choosing that and that's great for them. I
just have to very intentionally choose and discern the people,
places and things that make me feel alive. I like
(32:38):
that every day.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
I like that. For someone who's listening who feels stuck
in their old story, what's the first step to beginning
to rewrite theirs?
Speaker 3 (32:53):
The first step, I think is that awareness of being
stuck in the story. You know, how often do they
do they relive that. Are they telling their origin story
as as a way to honor it and acknowledge it,
or are they telling it as their identity. I think
there's two different you know, especially with and this is
(33:20):
something that I feel very strongly with the addiction aspect.
When you go into some of these rooms, and this
might not be a popular opinion, but when you go
into these rooms and they you say your name and
then you say I am you know, hello, my name
is and I am that is that sets the tone
(33:41):
for who you are and the actions that you will take.
And so whatever comes behind that, and these rooms keeps
people where they are. I had been in them for
about six months and I could no longer go because
I couldn't identify with with that version of me anymore.
(34:05):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 4 (34:06):
And so that's pretty powerful them. You know, you're not
being able to I'm sorry, that was pretty powerful itself.
What you just said, it's not not mm hmm.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
I started noticing again about six months in that I
don't feel there's a reason that anybody those these places
are support. They're not necessarily meant to to be uh
(34:50):
a crutch. And again this is everybody has their journey.
Everybody chooses and they get to choose. And this is
this is just the way that I look at it.
If I have to use a support for the rest
(35:11):
of my life, is am I moving forward? Or am
I staying in that same version of who I was?
Just not doing one action for one behavior?
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Wow? Very interesting. Well, thank you Krystal for sharing your story.
She's the founder of zenfully Aware. She developed the Arise method,
a comprehensive approach that weaves together mindfulness, somatic healing, and
the restorative restorative power of regenerative tourism. Through this framework,
she supports women and not only disentangling from the past,
(35:54):
but in cultivating and embodying expansive mindset that allows them
to move forward into the next chapter. You have lived
a life already and I believe that you will continue
to rewrite your story over and over again after your
profound resilience that you've shared in your story.
Speaker 3 (36:15):
Thank you so much, Wendy, Thank you for allowing me
to share and for having me on.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
The rewrite Oh, thank you so much. Thanks for being here.
Speaker 1 (36:23):
Nito Kuda Divorce and family laws attorneys have guided Connecticut
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(36:46):
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(37:09):
two O three five five seven nine five zero zero
Welcome to The Rewrite, a podcast about divorce, choice and
new beginnings. I'm your host Wendy Sloan, former TV producer,
mom of two and one sweet golden retriever. This is
a space for real talk about the moments that break us,
the choices that define us, and the power we have
to begin again. You'll hear personal stories, heartfelt insights, and
(00:22):
honest conversations about healing relationships and reclaiming your life one
choice at a time. I'll be joined by experts in divorce, finance,
mental health, wellness and more and everything you need to
support your next chapter. The most powerful chapters might be
the ones you write next. Let's begin your rewrite together.
This episode is brought to in part by the Needle
(00:44):
Kuda Law Firm guidance that moves lives forward.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Welcome back to the Rewrite. I'm your host Wendy Sloan
and my guest today is the founder of zenfully Aware
Coaching and creator of the Arise Method. She is a
regenerative prep regetative pert practitioner who helps women transform divorce
into a right of passive passage through solo travel, somatic healing,
(01:09):
and mindful reinvention. Guiding women to embrace what she calls
the divorce afterglow. How much do I love that? A
chance to grieve glow and reclaim themselves while exploring the
healing power that comes with it. I am so excited
for this interview. Welcome to my show, Crystal Carnahan.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Thanks. Can we just talk about.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Yeah, I'm so happy to have you. Can we just
talk about the divorce afterglow? That got me right there?
I was like, wow, we've done I've done a lot
of interviews recently about somatic healing, SO and mindfulness. So
you are right in line with what the rewrite and
my brand and everything else. But there's so much to
(01:55):
talk about with you. There's We're going to talk about
divorce travel as solo as a way to heal ruptured
and identity loss, reclaiming solo travel as a right of
passive passage power hold grief, growth and global collapse without
numbing out as you navigate your own separation and divorce
(02:15):
and regetative well being and tourism. So this is just
so interesting to me. But I want to back up
and first start with your own personal story.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Yeah, and you know, thank you so much for the
opportunity to tell my story. Uh it is, you know,
I think everyone's story is so unique, and mine really
I think started before I went to college. My parents
got divorced. That was the I feel like the true
(02:51):
rupture that I wasn't able to to really graph the
the gravity of it. And when they got divorced, I
slid basically downhill. It was my senior year of high school.
I did go to college. I was able to spend
a couple of years in Europe, which was, you know,
(03:12):
which was absolutely amazing. And when I got back to
to the States, you know, I graduated and then as
I was trying to figure out what I was going
to do after college, Mom kind of kicked me off
for payroll, said, okay, you have a degree, now, you know,
find find your own way to pay your own way
(03:35):
in the world. And that was, you know again, it
was one of those things where a time in your
life where you just don't know what you want to do.
So I went into the restaurant industry. I lived in
Atlanta for a few years and I remember specifically we
(03:58):
had a lot of corporate people that would come in
and one of the guys is like, you know what
he's like, don't ever work in corporate. He's like, is
it will suck the life out of you. And to
this day I don't know whether that just stuck, But
to this day I have never worked in corporate, but
I did stay in the restaurant industry. And when my
(04:20):
mom passed away about four years after college, I was
twenty five, again just in that, you know, not prepared
for that real trauma of someone who you just you know,
I always said I couldn't imagine living without her, and
(04:42):
then when you have to, it just becomes a whole
other becomes a whole other world. So since I was
in the restaurant business, I used what was available, which
is alcohol, and I did that well, and then you know,
(05:02):
that was something where you could get away with it.
The restaurant business is a lifestyle and it's absolutely amazing.
I don't I don't regret it at all. Yet I
just had not handled anything for the emotional after effects
of what had happened in my life, and so alcohol
became that numbing issue when I I guess the final
(05:27):
straw was that I had legal issues. I had you know,
the whole gamut of what can happen with alcohol and
I actually I lived in a resort town. I was working,
I was filling water bottles with street vodka and I
got in an accident and this four family on Fourth
(05:49):
of July weekend, you know, had to deal with me
in my state. It was a whole thing. Nobody got hurt, thankfully,
but it was that that was the turning.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah, that's pretty much probably had a sober you right up.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
Yeah, at that point I had to make a decision,
you know, a real decision of do I want my life,
how do I want my life to look? And so
I I quit drinking about a month after the accident,
and that has been eleven years, I think twenty fourteen August,
(06:30):
and yeah, it's it changed my life after that, thank you. Yeah,
like it. It changed my life for sure. So I
went on to get a Master's of Health and Wellness Coaching.
I you know, completely did a one eighty, stopped drinking,
(06:53):
Masters of Health and Whiles of Coaching, got my yoga
teacher certification. But we moved down to Florida from Maryland.
Everything was again just in this transitional state. At the time,
my husband and I you know, had had gone through
(07:16):
some really tough times. And throughout that there were some
other things that had come up, and I had to
make a decision of whether I was going to stay
with him or whether we were going to separate, And
at the time, with everything that was going on, we
decided to try and work it out, and it was
(07:40):
again challenging. It's one of those where betrayal, once you
find out about it, there is a lot of healing
that has to go into it, but it's also where
you don't know what you're trying to heal from first.
You know, was it my parents divorced that, you know,
(08:00):
the alcohol that I had just numbed out my entire life?
Was it this betrayal? You know what what comes first?
And I don't think I was at a stage that
I knew exactly what where to go and what to
heal in order to really have a have a foundational
(08:31):
I guess building from a foundational aspect.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
So you were married for twenty years. What did it
take for you to finally realize it was time to leave?
And you described your divorce journey as one of like
rediscovering wholeness. What was the turning point that led you
to that and also to book a one way ticket
to Dubai.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
So we we had been together twenty two years, we
were married for twelve, and in twenty twenty three, the
beginning of twenty twenty three, I had gotten I just
told myself I had always wanted to travel, you know,
I said, like, I got the bug when I was
(09:18):
in Europe in college. And then we got together and again,
you like, life happened and we just never traveled. And
so in twenty twenty three, I was like, I want
to travel more. And I put that out to him
and I said I would love to travel and I
want to do it with you, and so how can
we start to look at what that can mean in
(09:40):
our lives? And he, of course was like, oh, yeah, okay,
sure whatever. And I said I'm going to do it
with or without you, regardless, and he's like, yeah, okay, whatever,
Like just book a ticket, and so I did, and
I just started looking at the you know, halfway around
(10:03):
the world, almost the furthest place from where we were.
I started looking, you know, at what not the cheapest ticket,
but you know, just how do I get to the
other side of the world the quickest and you know,
the least extensive. And there was a ticket to Dubai.
(10:27):
That was reasonable and I plicked book and he came
home from work that night and I said, yeah, you know,
like I booked a ticket. He was like, oh where,
I said, Dubai and he flipped out, like flipped out
on me. And I'm just sitting there and I was
like this this is the I think, beginning of the end.
(10:52):
And I said, well, I can book you a ticket.
I said, I'm going. I can book you a ticket
and you know, we can go together or you have
to decide what that looks like. I'm going anyway.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
And after after that, I started just booking tickets to
I was in say shells As in Mexico for a month,
and I just started booking tickets. After that, I was
(11:29):
in Portugal, Tanzania, Thailand, and then that was Yeah, that
was kind of the demise where it was like we
didn't even I don't think really discussed it. We just
simply knew that, yeah, something was changing and and it
(11:55):
and us was no longer us. It wasn't we weren't
a couple any longer.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
So what did you learn about yourself while traveling alone
through so many countries?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
I learned that that is exactly what I have always
wanted to do. It had been something that just lit
a fire in my soul, whether I could speak the
language or not, or whether you know I had I
literally went with no expectations to all of these countries
(12:36):
and no plans whatsoever. Yow and just I even barely
had hotels. I barely had hotel rooms. When I got there,
I would just book tickets and land and then kind
of figure it out from there. Wow, and that really
(12:58):
excited me, I.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Can imagine, pretty amazing. It's so, I mean, people think
solo travel is like before you settle down, or as
a consolation prize after a breakup. How do you reframe
it as the right of passage?
Speaker 3 (13:20):
I think it's one of those where women, especially we
get caught in these in these roles, you know, we
play the role of whatever it is, the wife, the mom,
the business woman, the ants, the whatever that role is,
(13:42):
and we never really like, we never give ourselves enough
credit to go beyond those roles. And so the right
of passage was like everyone, not not everyone, but a
lot of the people that I came in contact with
couldn't understand one why I was, why I was traveling solo,
(14:09):
and you know, a lot of the question was like
well if like where's your family, you know, like if
you are solo, like who else do you? Who else
are you connected to? And I was like what is that?
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (14:27):
You know, why is that such a poignant question for
most people? And I think that right of passage to
like really like whenen we can it doesn't like a
oh we have to do the same thing or gender
roles or anything like that, but just getting out of
(14:52):
getting out of the role that you play, the identity
the way people are relating to you in such a
way that you are literally almost like forging an entire
new identity, and you don't have to play the role
(15:13):
when you're in a different culture, in a different country
and nobody knows you. You don't have to play that
role like the mom, the business woman. You get to
be you, for whomever you want to be.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Your story is really one of profound resilience, you know,
from losing your mom at a young age twenty five young,
navigating addiction, leaving a twenty two year marriage, setting your
sights and solo journey.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
You went six continents and fourteen countries. Is that what
it was?
Speaker 3 (15:49):
I did I did.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
Really. Yeah, we're gonna We're gonna Crystal. We're gonna take
a quick break with Crystal Carnahan. She is the founder
of self Thenfully, where she has developed the Arise method.
I'm going to ask her about all of that. We'll
take a quick break for one of our sponsors. We'll
be right back. You're listening to the rewrite.
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Speaker 2 (17:28):
We're back with the rewrite. So you've been on such
a journey. When did all this? When did you found
sendfully aware and develop the arise method? Tell us about that.
Speaker 3 (17:45):
So I basically started my business right after I got
my yoga teacher certification and my health and wellness coaching
certification as well. I didn't want to be in the
restaurant business anymore. And since I had my house and
(18:07):
not on certification and my go to teacher certification and
at the time, you know, it was two seventeen or
twenty seventeen, twenty eighteen, you know, the life coaching, business
of coaching in general was blowing up, and it was
all of this, and I was like, oh, I'll just
I'll start a business. And I had started. It was
called self Wellness. And you know, throughout that I hired,
(18:31):
Oh my gosh, I hired so many, so many coaches
to learn and teach and you know, anybody who would
And I hired really good coaches, and I hired some
really bad coaches, and of course, you know, it's all
a learning experience. Throughout that evolution, I started mentally aware.
(18:53):
I was working on what I called my full performance,
and I was working with atholetes because what I know was,
you know, we had these young athletes who were fifteen sixteen,
both female and male athletes, fifteen and sixteen, that were
blowing out shoulders, blowing out elbows, blowing out needs. Their
(19:14):
entire injuries were something that a fifteen or sixteen year
old shouldn't have. And I started looking into that. You
know why, why is that? I started prospecting coaches, how
do we how do we do practice, and how do
we do sports and athletics A little bit more mindfully
putting in you know, yoga, creating these mental capacity where
(19:40):
the kids weren't so focused and and the parents weren't
so focused on you know, the kid's success, that they
could actually listen to their body, that they could actually
come back into who they were, and that again they
weren't their only identity of you know, a baseball player,
soccer player, volleyball player, whatever it was. Basketball. So I
(20:04):
started working with them, and then I had also prospected hotels,
and I really wanted the people on vacation. I've lived
in resort towns my whole entire life, and I wanted
people on vacation to really honor themselves and start either
start their journey or continue their health and wellness journey.
(20:25):
And so let's do wellness while away, right elevate the
guest experience. At that time, you know, it wasn't quite
as prolific as it is now. And I also at
that time, there were a lot of videos, and I
really thought it was important to take a class with
a live and structure instructor at the resort that you
(20:48):
could connect with and you're also connecting with so many
different people from so many different places. I mean, I've
had people in yoga classes who were from the same place,
didn't know each other, but they lived literally right across
the street from each other, and they start conversations and
then yeah, like you take that home, right, and it's
it's such a different adventure. Obviously, COVID hit everything, everything changed,
(21:16):
the world changed. But what happened was I was down
in Florida and we were able to the hotel that
I was that I was that I had a contract at.
We were able to do our yoga outside because it
was warm enough, we could be space. And I started
(21:37):
just hearing people from every you know, New York, Jersey,
everywhere up north that came down. They're like, oh my gosh,
my gin's closed. My my, my, My whole health and
well being support system is closed down. They were like,
this is so great. I can come to this hotel,
I can do yoga with with a live person, I
(21:57):
can feel comfortable because it's outside, we're spaced. You know,
this is awesome. So I started, I started prospecting other
hotels and during that I was like, how do I
how do I do a step by step process? And
(22:19):
I started looking at words, and a rise stood out
because it means to emerge. And so when we arise,
and when we emerge, we align you know, our chakra systems,
and that is our internal energetics. You know. The R
(22:39):
was then after we align all of that system the
R is, we reclaim the breath and we reconnect with
the body because we're so disconnected from the body. And
then we get to after that, we get to illuminate,
no shine a light on what does that mean to
really reclaim our breath and reconnect with our body. And
(23:01):
also then we get to innovate, you know, some different
ways that work specifically for us. The S is then
we get to source our new story, like write a
new chapter from that rite of passage from you know,
just where we were to where we're going, or where
we were to now to where we're going. And then
(23:23):
we embody all of that and we continue to evolve.
So then you would just move back to the A.
And so that came out of all of this evolution
from working with athletes, from working with the hotels, from
I've worked with you know, teachers and taught people with
(23:44):
no limbs who were doing yoga, and it it's like, yeah,
you just get the human body is so amazing, and
we have gotten so far away from it and are
innate wisdom. And when we're going through divorce and separation,
(24:09):
we're literally relating to ourselves differently. And the travel comes
into it because so many women's stories they said, no,
I've felt I feel like an island, and I started
researching island ecosystems and this is like my favorite. Island
ecosystems are diverse because of their isolation. And so if
(24:35):
we start to look at that, it's like people feel
like islands. They think they're alone, but they're really creating
their diversity so that they can work within the collective
as who they are, right, Like, yeah, they can. They
can create this amazing diversity he was in themselves. That
(25:03):
that then just spreads out to whoever they come in
contact with. So that led to you know them as
an island. Here are island ecosystems. Oh my gosh, let's
travel the world and see you know how they how
this all correlates. And then when you travel, you since
you notice you know, islands are susceptible to I mean,
(25:28):
I'm down in the Caribbean. We're we're having the sargasm
susceptible to climate change, sea level rise, you have to
literally create. There's nothing you can't go to, there's no target.
You got to get on a boat to go to
the mainland, to get in a car, to take a
(25:51):
cab to you know, it's and and how and so
if that is what does life? You know, what are
we really what are we really focusing on? And how
are we how is it all coming together and integrated
(26:12):
in a way that allows us to be fulfilled and
be who we are.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
Well, that's a lot, and you invite your clients, So
I want to talk about this a little bit as well.
To embrace the divorce after blow tell us about that.
Speaker 3 (26:38):
As I was traveling and telling my story, there were
people who didn't know how to They really didn't know
how to react. You know, it was like why are
you traveling solo? And then like oh my gosh, well
where's your family? And then you know, and I would say, oh,
well I'm getting a divorce, and I would be like,
(27:00):
there's a you know, jaw drop, there's a kind of
a what do I say? Oh sorry or congratulations? And
I was just embracing it. You know, this is this
is great, Like it's okay, there's and then people started saying, well,
(27:20):
you're glowing, and then I was like, this is the
afterglow like this, going through that rupture is devastating and
it really sucks, but I refuse to stay in that
mm and the afterglow is so much better because then
(27:42):
you get to there's no commiseration and there's no blame,
and there's no shame, and there's none of the he said,
she said, right, and this is where the work comes in, right,
And I just refused to stay in. I was in
a lot of I was looking for some sort of
(28:04):
support where I didn't have to necessarily. Friends are amazing,
and when you're going through something like this, they tend
to either want to offer help that isn't really helpful,
(28:27):
or you know, they want to commiserate. And I didn't want.
I didn't want I don't want misery loves company. I wanted.
I wanted uplifting. And so some of the groups that
I had joined were, you know, very supportive for the
(28:47):
people who needed a space to vent and maybe relive
some of their trauma, and that is just not what
was working for me. There's nothing wrong. These spaces are available,
(29:09):
and I'm glad that people can go to them, but
I needed something different. I needed something where we were
moving forward. We were saying, okay, this happened, now now
what are we using from it? How are we moving forward?
How are we getting better and living our lives like
(29:31):
thriving within our lives, not simply staying stuck in that muck.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
You talk about holding grief, growth and even global collapse
without numbing out. How do you personally practice that?
Speaker 3 (29:57):
I do a lot. There is a lot of there's
a lot of breath breath work. I continue to practice yoga.
There's a lot of somatic aspects of really asking my body,
(30:19):
listening to my body, where am I tensing? And what?
You know, if it's my shoulders or my neck or
my throat, or even if it's the right side versus
the left side, what do those mean? You know? Like
your right side you know you or your left side
you're comin inside your masculine side? Am I trying to control?
(30:43):
Or am I not receiving?
Speaker 2 (30:45):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (30:45):
You know, even as it goes through, what do I
want for dinner? But really listening to the body, I
you know, it's eating with food and with nourishment. It's
not mess necessarily about like, oh, you can't have this
or you can't have that. Food is very neutral, but
(31:07):
what activates and makes you feel alive in the moment,
and also why are you eating what you're eating. So
there's a journaling again, reflecting every conversation, every every person
I meet, every person that I am that I have
(31:31):
to relate to in a certain way. Is very intentional.
And people are like, oh, well, you know, and I'm
on you know, I'm in a tourist town, I'm on
an island. But I do believe that the energy pulls
(31:52):
people in and repels people, and so I'm just no
longer in spaces that I used to be. I guess
we'll say that I And so therefore the people who
(32:13):
are in those spaces, and again this is not anything wrong,
Like they're choosing that and that's great for them. I
just have to very intentionally choose and discern the people,
places and things that make me feel alive. I like
(32:38):
that every day.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
I like that. For someone who's listening who feels stuck
in their old story, what's the first step to beginning
to rewrite theirs?
Speaker 3 (32:53):
The first step, I think is that awareness of being
stuck in the story. You know, how often do they
do they relive that. Are they telling their origin story
as as a way to honor it and acknowledge it,
or are they telling it as their identity. I think
there's two different you know, especially with and this is
(33:20):
something that I feel very strongly with the addiction aspect.
When you go into some of these rooms, and this
might not be a popular opinion, but when you go
into these rooms and they you say your name and
then you say I am you know, hello, my name
is and I am that is that sets the tone
(33:41):
for who you are and the actions that you will take.
And so whatever comes behind that, and these rooms keeps
people where they are. I had been in them for
about six months and I could no longer go because
I couldn't identify with with that version of me anymore.
(34:05):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 4 (34:06):
And so that's pretty powerful them. You know, you're not
being able to I'm sorry, that was pretty powerful itself.
What you just said, it's not not mm hmm.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
I started noticing again about six months in that I
don't feel there's a reason that anybody those these places
are support. They're not necessarily meant to to be uh
(34:50):
a crutch. And again this is everybody has their journey.
Everybody chooses and they get to choose. And this is
this is just the way that I look at it.
If I have to use a support for the rest
(35:11):
of my life, is am I moving forward? Or am
I staying in that same version of who I was?
Just not doing one action for one behavior?
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Wow? Very interesting. Well, thank you Krystal for sharing your story.
She's the founder of zenfully Aware. She developed the Arise method,
a comprehensive approach that weaves together mindfulness, somatic healing, and
the restorative restorative power of regenerative tourism. Through this framework,
she supports women and not only disentangling from the past,
(35:54):
but in cultivating and embodying expansive mindset that allows them
to move forward into the next chapter. You have lived
a life already and I believe that you will continue
to rewrite your story over and over again after your
profound resilience that you've shared in your story.
Speaker 3 (36:15):
Thank you so much, Wendy, Thank you for allowing me
to share and for having me on.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
The rewrite Oh, thank you so much. Thanks for being here.
Speaker 1 (36:23):
Nito Kuda Divorce and family laws attorneys have guided Connecticut
and New York families through complex divorce actions, contested child custody,
and alimony disputes for over thirty years. Their Connecticut and
New York attorneys have extensive experience in family matters involving
substance abuse, domestic violence, mental illness, and many other X
factors that can complicate a divorce. Their attorneys a deptly
(36:46):
managed privacy and reputation concerns inherit to public divorce proceedings
and the related exposure for their ultra high net worth clients.
Find your new path forward, define your post divorce family,
and secure and forcible agreement to protect your future with
Needle Cuda Act. Now put the strength of their team
behind you. Visit them at needlecuda dot com or call
(37:09):
two O three five five seven nine five zero zero
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On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.