July 16, 2025 • 56 mins
Join host Nyomi Banks on this deeply moving Wisdom Wednesday episode of The Season of Self Love Podcast as she welcomes BII survivor Aloma Devaux, whose powerful story demonstrates the profound transformation that happens when we stop apologizing for knowing our own bodies and start trusting ourselves as the ultimate authority on our experience. What You'll Discover: • The journey from external validation to radical self-trust • How to recognize subtle BII symptoms that doctors often dismiss • The courage required to ask for help and financial support for healing • Why finding your voice is essential for authentic healing • The immediate and long-term benefits of explant surgery Aloma's Transformation Story: Starting as an insecure young woman who got implants with a friend ("buddy system"), Aloma lived with implants for 32 years total - first set for years, then replacements for 19 years. Her journey shows how BII symptoms can be subtle and easily dismissed as "normal aging." Key Symptoms Aloma Experienced:
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- Severe shortness of breath and getting winded easily
- Constant "glue in throat" feeling and swallowing difficulties
- Mysterious red freckles appearing only under breasts
- Chronic neck, back, and shoulder pain from capsular contracture
- Debilitating brain fog and memory issues
- Extreme vertigo episodes during cross-country move
- Chronic fatigue and facial inflammation
- Low libido and night sweats
- Insomnia and overwhelming feelings of helplessness
- Ten years ago: First intuitive knowing that removal would bring "freedom"
- Three years ago: X-ray showing calcification on implants
- Six months ago: Finally researching proper explant surgeons and discovering BII
- The relief of checking symptoms off the BII list: "That's totally me!"
- Financial Challenge: Courageously asking friends for help with surgery costs
- Imposter Syndrome: Feeling like a "fraud" without severe autoimmune diseases
- Denial: Minimizing symptoms as "just aging" or "not that bad"
- Medical Dismissal: Doctors attributing symptoms to menopause or other causes
- Day 1: Complete elimination of back and neck pain
- Week by week: Continuous improvement in energy and mental clarity
- 6 weeks: Feeling better than ever, even better than before implants
- Overall: Profound sense of freedom and spiritual liberation
- "I felt if I could just get them out of my body, I would feel free" - the inexplicable knowing
- "Anyone who's had them out understands - you feel such a weight lifted emotionally, literally, and spiritually"
- "It only took me 32 years to get what I actually wanted"
- Ask yourself what you're truly scared of (appearance, finances, findings, effectiveness)
- Listen to your body - you are the ultimate authority on your experience
- Give yourself grace and trust your timing
- Know that you're worth every penny and second of recovery
- The experience isn't as scary as it seems and goes by quickly
- Connected with Dr. Sud's practice through Laura Bowden's guidance
- Found support in BII Facebook groups and online communities
- Experienced the power of women supporting women through shared experiences
- Now pays it forward by openly sharing her story and supporting other women
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the season and self Love Podcast. I am
in your host, Namibank Say, and I am thrilled to
have you joined me on this transformative journey. You see,
every day we dive into a powerful conversation about self discovery,
healing and empowerment. This podcast is brought to you by
ax Naomi and Elevate Me Self Discovery.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
What we believe that loving yourself.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
Is the first step to live in a fulfilling life.
You can expect sightful discussions, practical tips, and inspiring stories.
Plus we occasionally welcome special guests who will share their
unique perspectives on self love and personal growth. So get comfy,
grab your favorite beverage, and let's embark on this journey together.
(00:45):
Because it's time to embrace the beautiful person that you are.
So let's elevate our lives one episode of time.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
Now, let's get started.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Beautiful people will welcome back to this season a Sippler podcast.
I am your host, Namibanks and this is Wednesday and Wednesday,
so as we continue our July series preparing for transformation today,
I am so very blessed to share this sacred space
with yet another radiant soul whose journey we both inspire
and empower you.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
I have Aloma Devoi.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
And I hope I'm saying her last name right. She
is a bi survivor who has transformed her experience of
illness into powerful testament to the important or radical self
trust and authentic living. Aloma story beautifully illustrates that sometimes
our greatest healing happens not just in our bodies, but
in our relationships with our own voice, learning to speak
our truth, trust our knowing, and advocate fiercely for ourselves
(01:44):
when no one else will. Her journey reminds us that
healing is an act of rebellion against anything that tells
us we don't know our own bodies, or our own needs,
or even our own truth. So let's begin creating a
sacred space where truth can be spoken and received with love.
But before we bring Aloona to the stage, let's take
(02:06):
a quick break. All right, it segurty, God is not
my bank want this season? A steph of the podcast
and we'll be right back.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Washington wells into two focuses on healing always for me,
If I look good, then I feel good. If I
feel good, then I share the good. If I share
the good, then I celebrate the good. If I celebrate
the good, then I live the good, so I can
be paid to be my greatest. But I have to
learn the good to be the good.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
So what does it take to be the greatest.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
It's as simple as a free fifteen minute consultation.
Speaker 4 (02:39):
Be kind to yourself and He'll always.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
Hey seuagurty, God is now me banks It makes sure
YouTube have free Thursday.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Night at Naomi podcast. We'll be talking about everything love, sex.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Relationship, cost, differences so.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Much more by bridging the gap between them all. And
we even talk.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
About you need to stop by me and dot com
my podcast as well.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
As the BTV group.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
You have some amazing guests to come forward and never know.
Just make sure you tune met Thursday nice six pm
or sixt percent of times go to axlam.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Dot com and tell the miamisis all right? Beautiful people
will welcome back. Well, hello, miss Helma, how are you?
I'm good?
Speaker 4 (03:29):
Here are you?
Speaker 2 (03:30):
I am so well? Again, thank you for just joining.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Us here on this podcast here at the season and
something love and just having a courage to share your story.
But before we get into your story, we do a
nice little guided meditation just to help ground us before
we you know, talk about the topic.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Right all right, So, my beautiful listeners, if you.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
All can, right now, just close your eyes and just
get in a comfortable position. Take a slow attention of breath, then.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Hold it with awareness.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Now exhale completely, letting go of anything that is inserving
you in this moment. I want to feel your body
seeking into this present moment, fully support it and completely safe,
and place one hand on your throat and one hand
(04:23):
on your heart, connecting with your voice in your truth.
Imagine a warm golden light beginning to glow in your
throat chakra, expanding with each breath.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
This is the light of your authentic voice.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Your inner knowing your unshakable truth. Now as you breathe,
feel this light growing stronger and brighter, more confident. This
is a voice that always knows what's right for you,
(05:02):
the voice that speaks with love and clarity, the voice
that deserves to be heard and honored. Now, your next breath,
I want you to breathe in the courage to speak
your truth. And then I want you to breathe out
any fear of being misunderstood or dismissed. Know that your
(05:28):
voice matters know that your experience matters, know that your
truth matters, and when you are ready, gently bring your
awareness back to our conversation, carrying this sense of vocal
empowerment with you. All right, my beautiful people, again, thank
(05:51):
you for sharing that space with me right now.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
And if you're new here till the season and Suppler podcast.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
It's something we do every day Monday through Friday, just
to have ground us before we get into our time.
And again, this is a topic that's very personal for
me because this is something that I'm going through at this.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
Moment in time.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
So as I continue to prepare my own explet journey,
I constantly I'm so amazed by the powerful women and
their stories to heal, not just the storyteller, but everyone
who witnesses them. You know, each brave woman who shares
her journey, it creates a ripple of courage that extends
far beyond what she or I might ever know. You know,
(06:30):
Alonas story is particularly moving because it demonstrates a profound
transformation that can happen when we stop apologizing for knowing
our own bodies and start trusting ourselves as the ultimate
authority on our own experience. Her journey shows us that
finding our voice isn't just about speaking up, but it's
about trusting what we know to be true, even when
the world around us suggests otherwise. It's about the radical
(06:53):
self trust as both a healing practice in a way
of life. But today we explore almost beginning story to
the awakening that changed her relationship with her body in
her voice, the courage it took to advocate for herself
and the face of doubt, and to profound wisdom she
gained about trusting ourselves completely. Again, Alama, thank you for
(07:13):
being here today and for your willingness to share your
story with such openness and grace. I am so grateful
that you are in our presence.
Speaker 4 (07:22):
Well, thank you. I'm glad to be here.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Yes, beautiful.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
So I want you to know that this space is
completely yours. So it's your story, it's your truth and
your experience. So please share wherever you feel right and
that's truth for you, and know that you can have
this space that you need.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
So how did you begin? Like? What made you say
is time for my explant?
Speaker 5 (07:47):
Now?
Speaker 1 (07:48):
First of all, let's go all the way back, all
the way back to that decision that say I need
some implase let's go there.
Speaker 4 (07:57):
Yeah, that was a young foolish girl, you know, in
her twenties, and I kind of jumped on the bandwagon
with a friend who was like, hey, I'm going to
get some boobs, and I was like, well, I want
to get some boobs, I mean why not. Truth is,
(08:19):
I had perfect breass. I just wanted them to be
a little bit bigger, and I ended up with huge bress.
The doctor that I went to ended up being a
complete wacko and he got shut down. It was this
whole drama that you know happened with him, but we
(08:41):
didn't have the internet back then, so we didn't know
about it until years later. Then I had So I
had those implants for thirteen years and I just lived
with them because I thought, well, you know, I did it,
so now I have to live with it. I had
an accident on my horse and I felt something was off,
(09:06):
so I started, well, I got an MRI and they
said there was no rupture. They didn't see any issues,
but one of the implants had come out of the pocket,
and so I decided to get I get them replaced. Now,
nobody ever said anything about you know, silicone is bad,
(09:29):
you need to have them redone every ten years. Nobody said,
you know, they could make you sick. Just here you go,
you know, don't lift anything for four weeks, have a
nice life. And I had those implants for nineteen years.
(09:50):
I always I had subtle symptoms, but I never knew
that they were related to the implants. Notably, the one
thing that I noticed after my replacements was that I
had a really strong odor coming from my breasts, and
it was like a medicine smell. So that stuck with
(10:13):
me for years. It was really strange. I don't know
that I've ever heard anybody else say that they've experienced
that before. But you know, mind you, I'd got those
replacements in my thirties, and I had already been diagnosed
with like arthritis and all kinds of stuff. I mean,
(10:35):
I was too young for any of that. I used
to get night sweats, but I would only get night
sweats from like here down just underneath my breast, so
like this whole area would sweat profusely in the evenings.
I just had very random things, but again I never
thought it was related to the implants.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
Right, Okay, hold on, I'm here in a ring. What's
that ringing? Is that ringing on your side?
Speaker 4 (11:02):
Oh, it's probably my notifications on my computer.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
Okay, so let's do this.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Let's pause it for a minute and and see if
you can take that off.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Because that is very loud. Hold on one second.
Speaker 4 (11:13):
How do I.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
All right? So this is my question. I know you
just explained about your decision.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
It was like, you know, one of my good girlfriends
going again, so let me go give me a pair,
like it's a two.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
For one deal.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
And I totally understand that because I remember when I
made a decision that I was going to get in
plants and my sister, my sister did the same thing.
She was like, Okay, my sister going to get in plants.
I'm going to get implants. And we actually were a
part of the same singing group, you know, so it
was like, you know, we did it for you know,
for our career, you know, and you know all of
(11:49):
that other stuff.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
But when I look back right now.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I'm like, oh my god, did we just do this
a two for one type of thing? And now we're here,
you know, going through this right now. So I thought
that was so, you know, I laughed because I said
to Shelley Jane the other day, I was saying, oh
my god, this is like I'm there's a mirror imaging
the echoing of my life and my choices.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
What I did with these, with these yeah, we're all
like on the buddy system.
Speaker 1 (12:15):
I don't exactly, but when you did get that get
your impulse, what were your hopes and dreams when you
made that choice, and what were you hoping that would
shift or changed in your life?
Speaker 2 (12:31):
You know?
Speaker 4 (12:31):
I just I just it was a very insecure young lady.
I you know, I had a lot of trauma in
my life when I was younger. And what's funny is
that I didn't really like a lot of attention. But
(12:53):
how would I I still, like, I look back and
I go, well, what was I thinking that that was
going to do? Like, Hello, that's going to bring more
attention to me. So I just I don't know what
I was thinking. Honestly, I just feel like, uh, you know,
it was going to be a boost in my morale,
maybe I would do better in life. I just I
(13:16):
struggled a lot back then, you know, I struggled with
work and friends and family and everything. So I guess
it was just something to feel avoid. Yeah, frankly, you.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Know, yeah, you know what, looking back now, with all
of the growth and the wisdom that of course you have,
right that you gained just through your journey completely, how
do you feel towards the version of yourself who made
that decision.
Speaker 4 (13:44):
I feel I feel sad for her. I feel sad
for that young lady because there are so many things
that you know, we always look back and say, gosh,
you know, I could have done so many things different
and how would my life had been if I had,
you know, done done the things differently. But at the
end of the day, we can't take any of that back.
(14:06):
And you know, I've had to own up to all
of those things. I did feel a lot of guilt
when I decided to explant. I actually had to reach
out and ask my friends to help me pay for
part of that. And that's where some of the guilt
came into, Like how can I sit here and say, hey,
(14:29):
I did this, but I was wrong and that you
know I now I need you to help me fix it.
That was really hard, but you know, I've forgiven her
it is she did what she thought she needed to do, so.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
You know, I think, you know, thank you for sharing
that that when you just said that I had to,
you know, ask my friends to help me to you know,
for for this surgery, to help something that I've done
to my own self, you know, right, yeah, my heart
just like just did skip the extra bet because it's
truly about owning and speaking your voice, you know, and
(15:06):
asking for help you know when knowing you know, and
that's a powerful thing.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
A lot of people would think that's weakness, but.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
There is no shame in that same would have been
if you just said in it and just allowed that
toxic to you know, ruin and just I have a
brain fall right now, you know, take your body out completely,
you know. So you having a voice and finding your
(15:34):
voice to be able to even speak to your friends
that speak values and that speaks values.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Are your friends too of the.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
Connection in your community that you have, that they are
supportive regardless of the choices that.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
You made in your life. You know. I also think
the ability to just.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Hold compassion for our past selves while also honoring the growth,
that's a beautiful part of this whole healing process. It
sounds like that you have just integrating them, both understanding
why you made the choice, but also while celebrating how
far you've come, and I want you to know even
(16:10):
in that moment when you said I had to ask
my friends, and that's.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
Some shame to me.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
I think you're a lot of people heroes because a
lot of people might need to hear that right now.
That's probably sitting there right now, like how can I
possibly do this? How can I possibly pay for that
explant surgery? And living in that shame and unable to
go ask that friend or those friends like you know what,
you know, could you help me out right now? I
(16:36):
don't have the money to pay you back right away,
but I'm really going through something right now. So I
thank you for sharing that part.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
Of your life there.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
So let's talk about the moment that everything shift and
everything shift.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
When when did you first start questioning your.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
Implants or recognizing that something might not be right. Was
there a pacific a way any moment or was there
or was it more of a gradual unfolding of it all.
Speaker 4 (17:05):
So about ten years ago, I had a lump in
my breast and I had to go and get you know,
a bunch of stuff done and tests and at the
time I thought, you know, this would be a really
great time for me to get these things out of
my body. I just I could never really explain it
(17:28):
to people around me, like because everybody always said, oh,
you got these, you wanted them, Now you have to
live with them, you know. But I felt if I
could just get them out of my body, I would
feel free, and I could never explain that in words.
And obviously I didn't do it ten years ago, but
(17:49):
that's when it first hit me, like, this is something
I really need to start thinking about. About three years ago,
I was really sick and I went to get X
rays to see if I had pneumonia, and they said
in the report that they could see calcification on the implant.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
Oh wow, I.
Speaker 4 (18:12):
Could see it in the X rays, so and it
was just like a side note, you know, you should
go see your doctor about this and discuss this issue.
And I was like, oh, okay. Well, about that time,
I had started noticing that my implants were no longer
sitting where they should be sitting, and they were getting
(18:32):
really hard and they were kind of uncomfortable. And with that,
I still had that lump in there too, so that
just kind of added to that. Right, I would wake
up in a panic every day like, oh my god,
did the implant rupture, and so about six months ago
(18:52):
I finally started going down the rabbit hole and researching
doctors in the area to have the implants take it out.
That's when I discovered BII, and that's when I found
that you can't just go to any plastic surgeon and
have this done. It is really so important to understand
(19:14):
that you can't just go in and have the implants
removed and voila, you're good as new. There's just so
much more involved. But it's it's complicated, but not it's
simple if it's done right. So so that's where I started.
Actually interviewed with one doctor and decided that I didn't
think he was going to be a good fit for me,
(19:35):
and I waited six months before I reached out to
someone else because the cost was a problem and also
my little lump friend was a problem, and I had
to figure out how to deal with everything. And honestly,
I didn't feel at the time. I still didn't feel
like I had that many issues with BII denial, but
(20:01):
I also kind of felt like a fraud because I
was like, well, I don't have, you know, lupus or
any of these crazy autoimmune diseases. I mean, so it's
just maybe it's just not that bad. Yeah, but again
denial big time. So it took me six months from
starting my research to actually getting a doctor. And once
(20:23):
I talked to them, I was in. I was like,
sign me up, can I come tomorrow? And I had
no idea how I was going to pay for it.
I scheduled my appointment and I just trusted that God,
the universe and whoever, Wow, it was going to happen.
I knew I had some money I could put in
care credit. The rest of it I left up to
(20:46):
man upstairs and it all worked out. It was amazing.
It happened so quick.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Wow, that is so powerful.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
I'm just sitting here and right now I want to
I have tears that is in a backrond, but I'm
just like, no, nao, we don't do that.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Don't don't do that.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Because just listening to your story and as you were
talking about waking up in the morning with anxiety and
you know, hoping that that bag doesn't burst in your body,
and you know it's when you when you sit and
you think about it. And I want my listeners to
truly listen and hear me when I say this, and
(21:25):
I'm not trying to put fear in you, but I'm
just trying to give you the realization of what we
go through and what we feel when it's something in
our body that's deteriorating our body and we have nothing
to do about it.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
Nothing. A lot of doctors.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Don't know what it is, and some the ones that
do don't want to say what it is because it's
against what the whole you know, breast implants, all of
that thing.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Is, you know. And so.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
I commend you for saying, Okay, that's it. I got
to get up and go that. You really was like,
I have to listen to my body. I can no
longer go through this. And I heard you when you
said about about that's not me. I don't have the
you know, the out of immune disease and all of
(22:15):
that stuff. So I'm not that bad, you know us,
that's not happening. That denial thing that we do go through.
We and honestly, I don't know if it's denial as
much or as you still haven't seen yourself in there,
if that makes sense, you still have seen yourself within
the amazing women that are sharing their experience.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
You still haven't seen yourself.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
Myself when I was sick and was like, oh I can't.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
This is unbearable. I don't know what I'm going to do.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
And I remember going into the group and I remember
seeing everything and I'm like, okay, I don't have any.
Speaker 2 (22:56):
Of these immune out of immune disease.
Speaker 1 (22:58):
But I got that sense that's sympthing, that's sympt that's okay,
hold on.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
That's that's oh shit, that's the you know, just going down.
I was like, wait, hold on, like.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
This is I got the list right here. When I
started checking off the boxes, I was like, oh okay,
so okay, yeah, that was the reality check was that checklist?
Speaker 2 (23:21):
Yes? What's that checklist?
Speaker 4 (23:23):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
What's the reality of it? Yes?
Speaker 1 (23:26):
And I remember some of the things that I would
tell my doctor and he was like, what do you
think you're going through pre menopause? You know, do you
think you might need this medication for this? And I'm like,
I'm not a medication person. I'm a very herbal person.
Speaker 2 (23:37):
You know.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I'd like to have my herbs so you know, be
able to fix whatever ailment that's going on. And it's
just not working. It's just not happening in doing that.
I think it's important for women to hear that these
experiences because so many struggle to make the connections between
their symptoms.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
And their implants.
Speaker 1 (23:58):
You know, just like you said in the beginning, I
probably had those love fake feelings before, but I didn't
know that it was so connected to breast implant illness.
So actually I was about to ask you this question,
but you already answered that question on how you heard
about first heard about BBI.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
And how you connected the docs.
Speaker 1 (24:23):
But what was the most difficult part about accepting that
your implants might be causing your health issue? Because I
can imagine that there was some internal resistance that realization,
and I know you felt some guilt, but also within.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
That, was there any relief?
Speaker 1 (24:41):
Were there any was like, I'm not going crazy, so
let me stop answering for you what.
Speaker 4 (24:50):
There was a lot of relief. There were a lot
of aha moments because you know, especially the for symptoms
that I started exhibiting in the last year, because you know,
I thought, well, it's just age, it's just because I'm
lacking exercise. You know, I did go through early menopause
(25:13):
and it was awful. It was the worst, and so
you know, when I started reading other people's testimonies and
looking at you know, the different checklists and the things.
I was like, oh my god, that's totally I that's me,
Like I've been experiencing that. And I I'm not a
(25:35):
doctor person, so I'm not the person that's been like, hey,
I've been to every specialist to see what's wrong with me.
I pooh, no thanks. I've just honestly, I have suffered
silently because I just didn't feel like it was bad enough,
or I didn't even know that some of those things
(25:57):
were a problem. I just thought it was me getting
old or you know whatever. So yeah, lots of our
home moments definitely a lot of relief, like oh my god, Okay,
now I know, you know, And I realized we can't
blame every little thing on these breast implants, because there
are going to be some natural mishaps as we get older,
(26:24):
but definitely too many to be a coincidence, right, you know.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
So let me ask you this, because you do have
your list in front of you right now that I
don't mind if you can share what was the symptoms
that you had, So even if our listeners right now
are listening.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
And they can say wait a minute, I'm going through
that same thing. That's alluma is going through.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
I definitely had a lot of shortness of breath in
the last six months. I'm not kidding. I literally would
get winded walking upstairs. And I'm not terribly out of shape.
I mean, I'm still pretty decent shape and I'm not
that old. I don't smoke, I don't drink, so to
(27:10):
have that that was like, what the hell's going on?
You know? I had a lot of you know, I
hear people talking about clearing their throat constantly or not
being able to swallow. I always had glue in my throat.
That's still a way I could describe it. I always
felt like I had glue in there. I So in
(27:33):
the last year or so, I started getting a lot
of like little freckles, a lot of freckles, but down
underneath my breast look like underneath just there, not anywhere
else in my body. I don't have a lot of freckling,
but there were like those little red pigment things. I
don't know what they are. And strangely, that's also on
(27:57):
the list. So chronic neck and back pain. My shoulders
were always really bad. Now, obviously the weight weight is
kind of, you know, do some things to you. But
because I had the contracture with the capsules, they were
pulling on different parts of my chest, and you know,
(28:21):
the way it was just explained to me is that
it's basically like you're a marionette inside and it's pulling
on all these different parts of you and pulling you
out of whack, and you know, tugging on things that
you shouldn't have anything in there, pulling on your body
parts like that chronic fatigue inflammation. I mean, I just
(28:44):
did it before and after picture earlier today. My face
was so puffy the day of my surgery that I
almost didn't even recognize myself. Joint pain, you know, brain fog.
I'll tell you a quick little thing. I was driving
to my friend's house one day from another part of town.
(29:07):
I started to get on the on the highway and
I was like, wait a minute, I don't remember which
way I'm supposed to go. I drove back and forth
on the on the bridge on the overpass like four
times before I finally realized I was supposed to go
that way. It would just be the most random brain farts,
(29:29):
and it was really bad, and it was kind of
alarming because you know, I'm too young for Alzheimer's. I mean,
just in my head, I was like, please tell me
it's that Alzheimer's because that's horrible. But you know, just
random things like that, I will say that. And this
one is kind of sensitive. But I had had very
(29:53):
low libido for a very long time before I left
my life relationship. I just thought it was like, oh,
you know, there's something wrong with me. I've just had
zero And that was that one was kind of a
tough pill to swallow, but you know, and then I
had the night sweats I've had. I had vertigo really bad,
(30:17):
just random bouts of vertigo, and I had it so
severe when I moved from the West Coast to the Midwest.
I had it the whole time I drove here, and
oh it was awful.
Speaker 2 (30:32):
I'm like, how did you do that?
Speaker 4 (30:34):
I went to the doctor and they they didn't know
anything about it. They were like, well, you know, you
just need to do this, do a couple of these
upply maneuvers and you should be fine. But I tried
everything and it's just and then I just kept having
vertigo spells. That's probably that was probably one of the
hardest things to deal with, because if anybody's had the dizzies,
(30:57):
you know, yeah, sucks, it sucks. Yeah, so, you know,
and there's other things. You know, I've had insomnia for years.
I have been sleeping a lot deeper lately, so that's nice.
Still get up a couple times in the night, but
that's because I'm trying to stay hydrated. You know, I
(31:21):
had never discussed this with anybody ever, but you know,
I've heard women say that they had suicidal thoughts and
I've never I've never admitted to it, but I have
had moments in the past where I felt so helpless
(31:43):
that I thought, you know, be easier to just not
feel that way anymore, and it wasn't because I was
feeling so sick. I just felt so overwhelmed, and you know,
I just I'm just so relieved that I don't have
to feel that way anymore, you know. So I really
(32:07):
feel for the women who have had it a lot
harder than I have, but you know, we've all had
a rough go of it.
Speaker 1 (32:13):
Yeah, yeah, you know, again, thank you for just being
so vulnerable but with strength, was so with so much
strength right now, just to even share that with me,
and I can imagine, I truly can.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
I right along with you. I have vertigo and it's
really bad. Even as we.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
Speaking right now, I'm swimming, I'm swimming with it, but
it does and I don't think people understand that it
becomes very disabling. Yes, I shared just the other day
or last week in a conversation that I can truly
understand when about people that are paralyzed from the neck down.
(32:58):
When you your mind wants to do so many different
things but your body won't allow you to do those things.
It's very disheartening and it's very overwhelming. And sometimes you
feel like I just want to go to sleep and
not wake up.
Speaker 4 (33:12):
Yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
And so I understand exactly what that feeling is.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
And then put on top on it, you say I
did this to myself.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
You go through that guilt.
Speaker 1 (33:26):
So now let's talk about you've now made the decision
to have the excellence surgeon. Now you're ready to take
all of this stuff out of there. What fears of
concerns came up for you when you were considering making
this this big decision, even when you knew that it
was the right thing to do. You know, I guess
(33:48):
they want to talk to her.
Speaker 4 (33:50):
I'm sorry I locked him out so they wouldn't be
in here.
Speaker 2 (33:56):
That fear can still show up in very powerful ways.
You how did you did fear come up? And was
that concern for you? And what was it?
Speaker 4 (34:08):
You know, Obviously going into a surgery is scary. I
don't do well with anesthesia, so I was really worried
about being sick because every time I've got under, I've
come out and just you know, puked for twenty four hours.
I mean, my body just like does not like any
(34:28):
of that stuff. I just, I honestly wasn't worried about
what I was going to look like afterwards, because I
knew that it was out of my control, and I
knew that the doctor would do the best he could
with whatever I had to work with. Because I do
(34:50):
see a lot of people, you know, so super concerned
about it, but that's like their only focus. I just
knew that I needed to get healthy and I needed
to be free of these things. And you know, like
I said earlier, I just I can't explain it, but
I just felt like if I could just get them out, yeah,
(35:11):
I will be free. Yes, just freedom. You know, anyone
who's had them out. They understand what I'm talking about,
you know, and you really do feel such a weight
has been lifted off of you emotionally, you know, like
literally and spiritually everything. It's just amazing.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
Yeah, beautiful. So let's talk about your surgery.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Let's talk about the surgery experience only if you if
you're comfortable with sharing it all.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (35:45):
Absolutely, what would you want the listeners to know about
that part of your journey?
Speaker 4 (35:55):
I you know, like I said, it is scary going
into a surgery, but you have to go into it
with an open heart and just trust the process. I
will say that the recovery was more frustrating for me
because I had a lot of trauma where the doctor
(36:18):
did take out that lump for me as well as
do the ex plant in the lift. So I had
a lot of bruising on one side and I had
a lot of seepage on one side. In fact, I
just had my six week postop today. Oh everything's good.
I do still have a small area that is not
closed up all the way. So I just I just
(36:43):
had to lean into you know, am I gonna feel bad?
Am I going to feel good? And whatever I was feeling,
I just accepted it. I think I only cried once about,
you know, the whole process other than today. But I
(37:07):
just anybody going into it, you know, you really just
need to do some research. You need to feel good
about what you're doing and why you're doing it. I
know that if you're not ready, it's not going to
feel right, because I do see a lot of women
who I feel like they kind of rush into it,
but then their expectations are not appropriate or realistic. So
(37:32):
that's probably the biggest thing. You just have to have
realistic expectations. The only thing I expected to feel was
free and healthy.
Speaker 2 (37:42):
So right now, how do you feel? Do you feel free?
Speaker 4 (37:46):
I do? I do. I'm so I'm so happy and
I feel like I look way better than I ever did,
even before implants. So it's funny because I was like, gosh,
it only took me thirty two years to get what
I actually want finally, So yeah, I do. I feel
(38:07):
really really good and I have more energy. I just
am thinking clearly again, which is nice. And now that
I'm kind of you know, there's there's going to be
still along road of recovery because you're not just instantly
fixed in six weeks. You have to stay on top
of everything still, but I just I'm excited about moving
(38:32):
forward from here.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Yeah, so let me ask you this how how?
Speaker 1 (38:37):
And I heard you say that you had moments, but
you know, you had a moment where you cried and
just going through the emotional thing with the healing process.
Speaker 2 (38:45):
How did you nurture and support yourself.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
Through that healing process and what practices or people resources
were most helpful for your recovery.
Speaker 4 (38:57):
I you know, I had some very good friends that
helped me through my recovery, you know, family, and you know,
I had a lot of people that were like, oh,
you know, I'll come visit you. You know, if you
need any help, I'll help you. But honestly, once the
dust settled and my friend went home and everybody had
(39:20):
kind of come and brought food and did a couple
of things. For the first week, I was happy to
be alone. I really just kind of sat in the
in the quiet and took care of myself. I ate good,
I slept when I needed to sleep, I drank lots
of water, I watched whatever I wanted to watch on TV.
And I just I was okay with that. I didn't
(39:42):
feel like I needed a bunch of people around me.
I didn't feel like I needed a ton of people
taking care of me. I prepared for that before the surgery. Okay,
so I felt very prepared at home at least. And
you know, I did pop into the support oops, the
office advocate at my doctor's office. She checked in with me,
(40:06):
and she was wonderful too, just such a such a
great human being. You know, she literally held my hand
while it went into surgery. So that was Laura. That
was Miss Laura. She's the best. I just love her.
She's so sweet.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
Yes, she is.
Speaker 4 (40:24):
She is.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
She is a beautiful soul.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
I had the privilege to be able to interview her
as well for this podcast.
Speaker 4 (40:31):
Oh great.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
She gave some amazing advice and just even her story
as well, just.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
So you know her, you know, being back there.
Speaker 1 (40:40):
I mean she started back when we didn't have any
you know, cell phones were like the flip floones or
the bricks back.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
Then, when she had her you know, her whole.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
Thing with it, and it's just amazing that she's continually
with it, you know, boots down her and her husband.
Speaker 2 (40:54):
So I think it's so amazing.
Speaker 1 (40:56):
That and just how all of us just came across
one of another because I'm originally from Chicago, but I
lived in Las Vegas, and so we even.
Speaker 2 (41:04):
Seeing her posts. She was commenting up under somebody else's
post and a whole nother group.
Speaker 1 (41:09):
Yeah, caused me to go over to that group and
caused me to find doctor Sude, and I knew it
was it was truly supposed to be aligned where I
was supposed to be at.
Speaker 4 (41:19):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, wonderful there We were laughing because when
she asked me how I found him, I said, I
actually found him on Reddit, of all places, because I
was looking for before and after pictures. You know, nobody
wants to go to a doctor if they don't see
his work, So I definitely kind of went down a
(41:46):
rabbit hole on that.
Speaker 5 (41:48):
Then I found the group and I was like, okay,
and yeah, somehow her and I connected on Facebook, and
it took a couple of months before I actually called
the office and had my console though.
Speaker 4 (42:02):
Wow. So yeah, But once I had my consul, I
was like, Okay, what's the next date, here's my credit card.
Speaker 2 (42:12):
I want to do this.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
Now you've had your surgery, you're at home resting everything,
and I know you said this is your six weeks
check up today. What changes begin to emerge for you physically,
emotionally or maybe even spiritually. And how did you how
did your body or your attire being start to transform.
Speaker 2 (42:32):
Have you seen it start to transform as it yet?
Speaker 4 (42:35):
So I when I came out of surgery the next day,
immediately I noticed that I felt better. Wow, back pain,
neck pain, all of that gone. Like I literally went
there and I was so stressed out and I had,
you know, stuff going on with my back and my neck.
(42:56):
None of that, it was all gone, you know. And
it's crazy because you see people stay you know, Oh,
I've noticed so many changes with my breasts every day
or every week, but just the overall changes in your
body and your mind every week has been amazing. The
(43:17):
transformation a week ago was totally different than how I
feel today. And I just I feel better, Like you
just feel a little bit better each week. And you know,
there was of course, we had drains. I had to
put have those drains in. Those things are horrible. I
(43:40):
was so I'm sorry. I don't want to scare anybody.
I was probably more afraid of the dreams for the
whole recovery process than anything else. They weren't that bad.
They're just they're annoying. You know, You've got these tubes
hanging out of you and you've got to go in
and strip thes and do all that, and they're just
(44:03):
kind of they were kind of a nuisance to me.
And once I got them out, it was like an
instant relief, just that, you know, And that was on
day sixteen. The first couple of weeks kind of just
kind of felt like, man, it's taken forever to get
somewhere with this. But I I was kind of obsessive,
(44:25):
and I took pictures of my breasts almost every day
because I wanted to see how the bruising was, you know,
if they were if the shape was changing, you know
that kind of thing. I took pictures in my face
because I wanted to see how much the swelling had
gone down. And you know, Laura had said to me
(44:46):
when I was there, take pictures, document everything, because once
it's gone, you don't have that opportunity anymore. And so
I really kind of grabbed hold of that and did
just that. I documented that everything. So but yeah, I
would definitely say that you know, the transformation, it's going
(45:09):
to be different for everybody, but for me personally, I
just feel like each week has been a blessing in
different ways.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
Yeah, I kind of got emotional when you were saying
about the very next day you felt better like ease,
and I right now, just when you were talking, I
just visualized myself coming out of surgery the very next
day and feeling just so free, like no headaches, no
body aches, no nothing, no not feeling drained, just just
(45:42):
feeling full. I tell my co host on Mondays, doctor Will,
and he asked me what was my intention? What was
I looking for to get from getting, you know, removing
my explience? And I said, first of all, it would
make me complete. It will complete me. I think, out
(46:02):
of all of these years that I've lived my life,
all of the wisdom that I have, just everything that
I've I've accomplished as well as just did my work
on myself and loving myself, that that was the only
part of me that was incomplete. It was like, how
can I talk about self love when I have two
(46:23):
foreign objects in my body? That was a part of
me loving myself because of those things, you understand and
saying why my confidence was that?
Speaker 2 (46:32):
Like that?
Speaker 1 (46:34):
I remember and I say this joke all the time,
I'm eighty percent. But once I take these two out
of this, it's percent is gone.
Speaker 2 (46:42):
I'll be twenty percent after that.
Speaker 1 (46:44):
But I felt you when you said that next day,
that you and that's what I'm excited about.
Speaker 2 (46:49):
That's what my vision to look like is to be.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
You know, I understand that everyone heals differently, you know,
and so for me, I'm actually taking those two months off,
you know, the August and September off and kind of
being to myself and actually really going through the healing
process with eating the ripe foods, even surrounding myself by
(47:16):
amazing people that won't spiritually drained.
Speaker 2 (47:19):
Me at all.
Speaker 1 (47:21):
And so just as you said that, that was that
was very enlightening for me.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
And thank you for sharing that. Yeah, yeah, thank you
for sharing that.
Speaker 1 (47:30):
All Right, So we are at the end of our
our show. We really is, and it because I didn't
even get to ask a lot of questions.
Speaker 2 (47:41):
No, but I'm gonna I'm gonna go no, I'm gonna
say this.
Speaker 1 (47:45):
What would you share with women who are considering expert
surgery but it's still feeling uncertain or scared.
Speaker 4 (47:54):
Well, I think the first thing I would say is
Ask yourself what you're scared of. Is it because you're
afraid of how you're gonna look? Is it because you're
afraid of the financial burden. Are you afraid they're going
to find something? Are you afraid it's not going to
fix you? And and then give yourself some grace and
(48:17):
just know that you know you have to listen to
your body. Just like you said, You've got to listen
to your body and and know that you're you're going
to make the right decision for you. There's no nobody
can tell you what you know you need to do.
You have to listen to your body and know that
that is absolutely the right time for you to do that.
(48:41):
And it's going to be It's going to be fine.
You're gonna be okay. It's not as scary as it seems.
It's going to go by super fast. I can't believe
it's already been six weeks. I was six weeks. I
scheduled mine six weeks out, and every day I was like,
oh my god, I we should hurt up and get here.
(49:03):
And then it was there, and I was like, oh
my god, it's here. But it's you know, it's it's
an amazing experience for me personally, it wasn't super painful,
so I didn't have to take a lot of stuff,
and I just got to sit in my new body
and let it heal and watch it heal and watch
(49:26):
the progression for a new lease on life. And you
know it's worth It's worth every penny, it's worth every
second of your recovery, and you owe it to yourself.
You're absolutely worth it.
Speaker 1 (49:42):
Yeah, beautiful, thank you, thank you for those last words.
I myself right now, I am six weeks out. Yeah, yeah,
as the time of this hating you all.
Speaker 2 (49:55):
Fixed weeks out.
Speaker 1 (49:56):
All right, So Alama, I am so deeply grateful for
you and your courage, your wisdom, and your willingness, Oh
my God, to just share your truth so openly and beautifully.
You know, your journey is truly going to inspire Somebody's
already inspired and empowered me in so many different ways,
but for so many other women that are out there
and learning to trust their own voices and advocate for
(50:19):
their own healing. If listeners right now, if you're listening
and want to connect, and they want to connect with
you or follow your continued journey and learn more about
your Is there a way that they can contact you
or on Facebook or anything like that.
Speaker 4 (50:36):
Yeah, they can reach out to me on Facebook. It's
my profile is public. It's Alma de vous and I'm
in a lot of the BII groups as well, so
you can always search for a Loma and there. There
shouldn't be any other Alomas at least I haven't seen
any in there.
Speaker 2 (50:57):
I actually know Aloma. I grew up with her sister.
We were best friends. Yes, you're the second Alma that
I've ever met walking around here.
Speaker 4 (51:08):
You three was my grandma. Okay, okay, I met another
one through work. She lived in like the Bahamas or
something crazy. But yeah, okay, so yeah, I'm more than
happy to talk to I've already had a lot of
women reach out to me on Facebook and ask me questions.
(51:29):
And it's interesting. Like I said, it's a little community
within a community, and it's it's beautiful. So I'm an
open book.
Speaker 2 (51:38):
Again.
Speaker 1 (51:39):
Thank you again for just sharing your story and tell
my beautiful souls out there. I hope that Alona's story
has reminded you of the incredible power of your own
voice and the wisdom of your own knowing. You know
her journey shows us that radical self trust is. It's
just not a nice idea, it's a revolutionary act. Whether
you considering experts, surgery, or facing any major health decision,
(52:02):
or just simply learning to trust your inner voice more completely.
Remember that you are the ultimate authority on your own experience.
Your body speaks to you constantly. Your intuition guys you continuously,
and your voice, that beautiful, powerful voice that alma has
to be claimed so couragually deserves to be heard and
honored in trust. So let's close this moment where we
(52:26):
start doing I'm just doing it in a month of
July as we do what I call a conclusion closing meditation.
So if you just shared this moment with me as
well as you listeners right now, to just get in
a comfortable position and just close your eyes for a moment.
Place one hand on your throat, in one hand on
(52:48):
your heart, connecting with your voice and your truth. Don't
take three deep attentional breaths, feeling the vibration of your
breath in your throat. Now speak silently to yourself. I
trust my voice, I trust my knowing, I trust my truth.
(53:18):
Feel these words resonateing in your throat. In your heart,
in your entire being. Now act your inner voice, what
do you most want me to know today? And listen
with complete openness to whatever arises a feeling, a word,
(53:45):
a sense, or a simple knowing. Maybe it's encouragement about
a decision that you're facing. Maybe it's guidance about your
health or your life. Maybe it's simply a reminder of
how loved and supported that you are. Whatever your inner
(54:08):
voice shares, receive it with gratitude and.
Speaker 2 (54:12):
Trust this voice. Your voice.
Speaker 1 (54:18):
Is your most reliable guide, your most faithful companion, your
most loving teacher. And I want you to say to yourself,
I honor my voice, I trust my knowing, and I
will listen to my truth with love, in respect, and
(54:43):
feel this commitment settling into your bones, your heart, your
very essence. Your voice matters, Your truth matters.
Speaker 2 (55:00):
Matter.
Speaker 1 (55:02):
Now take one more deep breath, then, carrying this sacred
trust into your week. All right, my beautiful people, thank
you again for just sharing that moment, that closing moment,
for with us right here this week. I just want
you to practice just honoring your voice, both the small
(55:22):
and the significant ways. Each day, ask yourself, what is
my truth about this situation, what do.
Speaker 2 (55:30):
My inner voice won't be to know?
Speaker 1 (55:33):
In practice, speaking your truth with kindness but clarity. Notice
when you want to dismiss your own knowing and choose
to trust instead.
Speaker 2 (55:43):
If a Loma story move you, please.
Speaker 1 (55:45):
Share this episode with someone who might need to hear
about the power of radical self trust. Your sharing could
be a catalyst that helps another woman find her voice
or to trust her own knowing. Remember, my beautiful people,
whether you are facing major life's decisions, are simply learning
to trust yourself more deeply.
Speaker 2 (56:04):
Your voice is your superpower.
Speaker 1 (56:06):
The more that you honor it, the stronger it becomes,
and the more aligned that you are with your life,
and it becomes your authentic truth. Trust your voice, trust
your knowing, trust your magnificent wisdom that you live in.
Speaker 2 (56:19):
And so until next time, keep speaking your truth and
loving you. Have an amazing, amazing day. Thank you again,
Thank you,
Welcome to the season and self Love Podcast. I am
in your host, Namibank Say, and I am thrilled to
have you joined me on this transformative journey. You see,
every day we dive into a powerful conversation about self discovery,
healing and empowerment. This podcast is brought to you by
ax Naomi and Elevate Me Self Discovery.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
What we believe that loving yourself.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
Is the first step to live in a fulfilling life.
You can expect sightful discussions, practical tips, and inspiring stories.
Plus we occasionally welcome special guests who will share their
unique perspectives on self love and personal growth. So get comfy,
grab your favorite beverage, and let's embark on this journey together.
(00:45):
Because it's time to embrace the beautiful person that you are.
So let's elevate our lives one episode of time.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
Now, let's get started.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Beautiful people will welcome back to this season a Sippler podcast.
I am your host, Namibanks and this is Wednesday and Wednesday,
so as we continue our July series preparing for transformation today,
I am so very blessed to share this sacred space
with yet another radiant soul whose journey we both inspire
and empower you.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
I have Aloma Devoi.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
And I hope I'm saying her last name right. She
is a bi survivor who has transformed her experience of
illness into powerful testament to the important or radical self
trust and authentic living. Aloma story beautifully illustrates that sometimes
our greatest healing happens not just in our bodies, but
in our relationships with our own voice, learning to speak
our truth, trust our knowing, and advocate fiercely for ourselves
(01:44):
when no one else will. Her journey reminds us that
healing is an act of rebellion against anything that tells
us we don't know our own bodies, or our own needs,
or even our own truth. So let's begin creating a
sacred space where truth can be spoken and received with love.
But before we bring Aloona to the stage, let's take
(02:06):
a quick break. All right, it segurty, God is not
my bank want this season? A steph of the podcast
and we'll be right back.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Washington wells into two focuses on healing always for me,
If I look good, then I feel good. If I
feel good, then I share the good. If I share
the good, then I celebrate the good. If I celebrate
the good, then I live the good, so I can
be paid to be my greatest. But I have to
learn the good to be the good.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
So what does it take to be the greatest.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
It's as simple as a free fifteen minute consultation.
Speaker 4 (02:39):
Be kind to yourself and He'll always.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
Hey seuagurty, God is now me banks It makes sure
YouTube have free Thursday.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Night at Naomi podcast. We'll be talking about everything love, sex.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Relationship, cost, differences so.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Much more by bridging the gap between them all. And
we even talk.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
About you need to stop by me and dot com
my podcast as well.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
As the BTV group.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
You have some amazing guests to come forward and never know.
Just make sure you tune met Thursday nice six pm
or sixt percent of times go to axlam.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Dot com and tell the miamisis all right? Beautiful people
will welcome back. Well, hello, miss Helma, how are you?
I'm good?
Speaker 4 (03:29):
Here are you?
Speaker 2 (03:30):
I am so well? Again, thank you for just joining.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Us here on this podcast here at the season and
something love and just having a courage to share your story.
But before we get into your story, we do a
nice little guided meditation just to help ground us before
we you know, talk about the topic.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Right all right, So, my beautiful listeners, if you.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
All can, right now, just close your eyes and just
get in a comfortable position. Take a slow attention of breath, then.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Hold it with awareness.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Now exhale completely, letting go of anything that is inserving
you in this moment. I want to feel your body
seeking into this present moment, fully support it and completely safe,
and place one hand on your throat and one hand
(04:23):
on your heart, connecting with your voice in your truth.
Imagine a warm golden light beginning to glow in your
throat chakra, expanding with each breath.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
This is the light of your authentic voice.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Your inner knowing your unshakable truth. Now as you breathe,
feel this light growing stronger and brighter, more confident. This
is a voice that always knows what's right for you,
(05:02):
the voice that speaks with love and clarity, the voice
that deserves to be heard and honored. Now, your next breath,
I want you to breathe in the courage to speak
your truth. And then I want you to breathe out
any fear of being misunderstood or dismissed. Know that your
(05:28):
voice matters know that your experience matters, know that your
truth matters, and when you are ready, gently bring your
awareness back to our conversation, carrying this sense of vocal
empowerment with you. All right, my beautiful people, again, thank
(05:51):
you for sharing that space with me right now.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
And if you're new here till the season and Suppler podcast.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
It's something we do every day Monday through Friday, just
to have ground us before we get into our time.
And again, this is a topic that's very personal for
me because this is something that I'm going through at this.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
Moment in time.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
So as I continue to prepare my own explet journey,
I constantly I'm so amazed by the powerful women and
their stories to heal, not just the storyteller, but everyone
who witnesses them. You know, each brave woman who shares
her journey, it creates a ripple of courage that extends
far beyond what she or I might ever know. You know,
(06:30):
Alonas story is particularly moving because it demonstrates a profound
transformation that can happen when we stop apologizing for knowing
our own bodies and start trusting ourselves as the ultimate
authority on our own experience. Her journey shows us that
finding our voice isn't just about speaking up, but it's
about trusting what we know to be true, even when
the world around us suggests otherwise. It's about the radical
(06:53):
self trust as both a healing practice in a way
of life. But today we explore almost beginning story to
the awakening that changed her relationship with her body in
her voice, the courage it took to advocate for herself
and the face of doubt, and to profound wisdom she
gained about trusting ourselves completely. Again, Alama, thank you for
(07:13):
being here today and for your willingness to share your
story with such openness and grace. I am so grateful
that you are in our presence.
Speaker 4 (07:22):
Well, thank you. I'm glad to be here.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Yes, beautiful.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
So I want you to know that this space is
completely yours. So it's your story, it's your truth and
your experience. So please share wherever you feel right and
that's truth for you, and know that you can have
this space that you need.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
So how did you begin? Like? What made you say
is time for my explant?
Speaker 5 (07:47):
Now?
Speaker 1 (07:48):
First of all, let's go all the way back, all
the way back to that decision that say I need
some implase let's go there.
Speaker 4 (07:57):
Yeah, that was a young foolish girl, you know, in
her twenties, and I kind of jumped on the bandwagon
with a friend who was like, hey, I'm going to
get some boobs, and I was like, well, I want
to get some boobs, I mean why not. Truth is,
(08:19):
I had perfect breass. I just wanted them to be
a little bit bigger, and I ended up with huge bress.
The doctor that I went to ended up being a
complete wacko and he got shut down. It was this
whole drama that you know happened with him, but we
(08:41):
didn't have the internet back then, so we didn't know
about it until years later. Then I had So I
had those implants for thirteen years and I just lived
with them because I thought, well, you know, I did it,
so now I have to live with it. I had
an accident on my horse and I felt something was off,
(09:06):
so I started, well, I got an MRI and they
said there was no rupture. They didn't see any issues,
but one of the implants had come out of the pocket,
and so I decided to get I get them replaced. Now,
nobody ever said anything about you know, silicone is bad,
(09:29):
you need to have them redone every ten years. Nobody said,
you know, they could make you sick. Just here you go,
you know, don't lift anything for four weeks, have a
nice life. And I had those implants for nineteen years.
(09:50):
I always I had subtle symptoms, but I never knew
that they were related to the implants. Notably, the one
thing that I noticed after my replacements was that I
had a really strong odor coming from my breasts, and
it was like a medicine smell. So that stuck with
(10:13):
me for years. It was really strange. I don't know
that I've ever heard anybody else say that they've experienced
that before. But you know, mind you, I'd got those
replacements in my thirties, and I had already been diagnosed
with like arthritis and all kinds of stuff. I mean,
(10:35):
I was too young for any of that. I used
to get night sweats, but I would only get night
sweats from like here down just underneath my breast, so
like this whole area would sweat profusely in the evenings.
I just had very random things, but again I never
thought it was related to the implants.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
Right, Okay, hold on, I'm here in a ring. What's
that ringing? Is that ringing on your side?
Speaker 4 (11:02):
Oh, it's probably my notifications on my computer.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
Okay, so let's do this.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Let's pause it for a minute and and see if
you can take that off.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Because that is very loud. Hold on one second.
Speaker 4 (11:13):
How do I.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
All right? So this is my question. I know you
just explained about your decision.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
It was like, you know, one of my good girlfriends
going again, so let me go give me a pair,
like it's a two.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
For one deal.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
And I totally understand that because I remember when I
made a decision that I was going to get in
plants and my sister, my sister did the same thing.
She was like, Okay, my sister going to get in plants.
I'm going to get implants. And we actually were a
part of the same singing group, you know, so it
was like, you know, we did it for you know,
for our career, you know, and you know all of
(11:49):
that other stuff.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
But when I look back right now.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I'm like, oh my god, did we just do this
a two for one type of thing? And now we're here,
you know, going through this right now. So I thought
that was so, you know, I laughed because I said
to Shelley Jane the other day, I was saying, oh
my god, this is like I'm there's a mirror imaging
the echoing of my life and my choices.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
What I did with these, with these yeah, we're all
like on the buddy system.
Speaker 1 (12:15):
I don't exactly, but when you did get that get
your impulse, what were your hopes and dreams when you
made that choice, and what were you hoping that would
shift or changed in your life?
Speaker 2 (12:31):
You know?
Speaker 4 (12:31):
I just I just it was a very insecure young lady.
I you know, I had a lot of trauma in
my life when I was younger. And what's funny is
that I didn't really like a lot of attention. But
(12:53):
how would I I still, like, I look back and
I go, well, what was I thinking that that was
going to do? Like, Hello, that's going to bring more
attention to me. So I just I don't know what
I was thinking. Honestly, I just feel like, uh, you know,
it was going to be a boost in my morale,
maybe I would do better in life. I just I
(13:16):
struggled a lot back then, you know, I struggled with
work and friends and family and everything. So I guess
it was just something to feel avoid. Yeah, frankly, you.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Know, yeah, you know what, looking back now, with all
of the growth and the wisdom that of course you have,
right that you gained just through your journey completely, how
do you feel towards the version of yourself who made
that decision.
Speaker 4 (13:44):
I feel I feel sad for her. I feel sad
for that young lady because there are so many things
that you know, we always look back and say, gosh,
you know, I could have done so many things different
and how would my life had been if I had,
you know, done done the things differently. But at the
end of the day, we can't take any of that back.
(14:06):
And you know, I've had to own up to all
of those things. I did feel a lot of guilt
when I decided to explant. I actually had to reach
out and ask my friends to help me pay for
part of that. And that's where some of the guilt
came into, Like how can I sit here and say, hey,
(14:29):
I did this, but I was wrong and that you
know I now I need you to help me fix it.
That was really hard, but you know, I've forgiven her
it is she did what she thought she needed to do, so.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
You know, I think, you know, thank you for sharing
that that when you just said that I had to,
you know, ask my friends to help me to you know,
for for this surgery, to help something that I've done
to my own self, you know, right, yeah, my heart
just like just did skip the extra bet because it's
truly about owning and speaking your voice, you know, and
(15:06):
asking for help you know when knowing you know, and
that's a powerful thing.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
A lot of people would think that's weakness, but.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
There is no shame in that same would have been
if you just said in it and just allowed that
toxic to you know, ruin and just I have a
brain fall right now, you know, take your body out completely,
you know. So you having a voice and finding your
(15:34):
voice to be able to even speak to your friends
that speak values and that speaks values.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Are your friends too of the.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
Connection in your community that you have, that they are
supportive regardless of the choices that.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
You made in your life. You know. I also think
the ability to just.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Hold compassion for our past selves while also honoring the growth,
that's a beautiful part of this whole healing process. It
sounds like that you have just integrating them, both understanding
why you made the choice, but also while celebrating how
far you've come, and I want you to know even
(16:10):
in that moment when you said I had to ask
my friends, and that's.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
Some shame to me.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
I think you're a lot of people heroes because a
lot of people might need to hear that right now.
That's probably sitting there right now, like how can I
possibly do this? How can I possibly pay for that
explant surgery? And living in that shame and unable to
go ask that friend or those friends like you know what,
you know, could you help me out right now? I
(16:36):
don't have the money to pay you back right away,
but I'm really going through something right now. So I
thank you for sharing that part.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
Of your life there.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
So let's talk about the moment that everything shift and
everything shift.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
When when did you first start questioning your.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
Implants or recognizing that something might not be right. Was
there a pacific a way any moment or was there
or was it more of a gradual unfolding of it all.
Speaker 4 (17:05):
So about ten years ago, I had a lump in
my breast and I had to go and get you know,
a bunch of stuff done and tests and at the
time I thought, you know, this would be a really
great time for me to get these things out of
my body. I just I could never really explain it
(17:28):
to people around me, like because everybody always said, oh,
you got these, you wanted them, Now you have to
live with them, you know. But I felt if I
could just get them out of my body, I would
feel free, and I could never explain that in words.
And obviously I didn't do it ten years ago, but
(17:49):
that's when it first hit me, like, this is something
I really need to start thinking about. About three years ago,
I was really sick and I went to get X
rays to see if I had pneumonia, and they said
in the report that they could see calcification on the implant.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
Oh wow, I.
Speaker 4 (18:12):
Could see it in the X rays, so and it
was just like a side note, you know, you should
go see your doctor about this and discuss this issue.
And I was like, oh, okay. Well, about that time,
I had started noticing that my implants were no longer
sitting where they should be sitting, and they were getting
(18:32):
really hard and they were kind of uncomfortable. And with that,
I still had that lump in there too, so that
just kind of added to that. Right, I would wake
up in a panic every day like, oh my god,
did the implant rupture, and so about six months ago
(18:52):
I finally started going down the rabbit hole and researching
doctors in the area to have the implants take it out.
That's when I discovered BII, and that's when I found
that you can't just go to any plastic surgeon and
have this done. It is really so important to understand
(19:14):
that you can't just go in and have the implants
removed and voila, you're good as new. There's just so
much more involved. But it's it's complicated, but not it's
simple if it's done right. So so that's where I started.
Actually interviewed with one doctor and decided that I didn't
think he was going to be a good fit for me,
(19:35):
and I waited six months before I reached out to
someone else because the cost was a problem and also
my little lump friend was a problem, and I had
to figure out how to deal with everything. And honestly,
I didn't feel at the time. I still didn't feel
like I had that many issues with BII denial, but
(20:01):
I also kind of felt like a fraud because I
was like, well, I don't have, you know, lupus or
any of these crazy autoimmune diseases. I mean, so it's
just maybe it's just not that bad. Yeah, but again
denial big time. So it took me six months from
starting my research to actually getting a doctor. And once
(20:23):
I talked to them, I was in. I was like,
sign me up, can I come tomorrow? And I had
no idea how I was going to pay for it.
I scheduled my appointment and I just trusted that God,
the universe and whoever, Wow, it was going to happen.
I knew I had some money I could put in
care credit. The rest of it I left up to
(20:46):
man upstairs and it all worked out. It was amazing.
It happened so quick.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Wow, that is so powerful.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
I'm just sitting here and right now I want to
I have tears that is in a backrond, but I'm
just like, no, nao, we don't do that.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Don't don't do that.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Because just listening to your story and as you were
talking about waking up in the morning with anxiety and
you know, hoping that that bag doesn't burst in your body,
and you know it's when you when you sit and
you think about it. And I want my listeners to
truly listen and hear me when I say this, and
(21:25):
I'm not trying to put fear in you, but I'm
just trying to give you the realization of what we
go through and what we feel when it's something in
our body that's deteriorating our body and we have nothing
to do about it.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
Nothing. A lot of doctors.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Don't know what it is, and some the ones that
do don't want to say what it is because it's
against what the whole you know, breast implants, all of
that thing.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Is, you know. And so.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
I commend you for saying, Okay, that's it. I got
to get up and go that. You really was like,
I have to listen to my body. I can no
longer go through this. And I heard you when you
said about about that's not me. I don't have the
you know, the out of immune disease and all of
(22:15):
that stuff. So I'm not that bad, you know us,
that's not happening. That denial thing that we do go through.
We and honestly, I don't know if it's denial as
much or as you still haven't seen yourself in there,
if that makes sense, you still have seen yourself within
the amazing women that are sharing their experience.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
You still haven't seen yourself.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
Myself when I was sick and was like, oh I can't.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
This is unbearable. I don't know what I'm going to do.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
And I remember going into the group and I remember
seeing everything and I'm like, okay, I don't have any.
Speaker 2 (22:56):
Of these immune out of immune disease.
Speaker 1 (22:58):
But I got that sense that's sympthing, that's sympt that's okay,
hold on.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
That's that's oh shit, that's the you know, just going down.
I was like, wait, hold on, like.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
This is I got the list right here. When I
started checking off the boxes, I was like, oh okay,
so okay, yeah, that was the reality check was that checklist?
Speaker 2 (23:21):
Yes? What's that checklist?
Speaker 4 (23:23):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
What's the reality of it? Yes?
Speaker 1 (23:26):
And I remember some of the things that I would
tell my doctor and he was like, what do you
think you're going through pre menopause? You know, do you
think you might need this medication for this? And I'm like,
I'm not a medication person. I'm a very herbal person.
Speaker 2 (23:37):
You know.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I'd like to have my herbs so you know, be
able to fix whatever ailment that's going on. And it's
just not working. It's just not happening in doing that.
I think it's important for women to hear that these
experiences because so many struggle to make the connections between
their symptoms.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
And their implants.
Speaker 1 (23:58):
You know, just like you said in the beginning, I
probably had those love fake feelings before, but I didn't
know that it was so connected to breast implant illness.
So actually I was about to ask you this question,
but you already answered that question on how you heard
about first heard about BBI.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
And how you connected the docs.
Speaker 1 (24:23):
But what was the most difficult part about accepting that
your implants might be causing your health issue? Because I
can imagine that there was some internal resistance that realization,
and I know you felt some guilt, but also within.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
That, was there any relief?
Speaker 1 (24:41):
Were there any was like, I'm not going crazy, so
let me stop answering for you what.
Speaker 4 (24:50):
There was a lot of relief. There were a lot
of aha moments because you know, especially the for symptoms
that I started exhibiting in the last year, because you know,
I thought, well, it's just age, it's just because I'm
lacking exercise. You know, I did go through early menopause
(25:13):
and it was awful. It was the worst, and so
you know, when I started reading other people's testimonies and
looking at you know, the different checklists and the things.
I was like, oh my god, that's totally I that's me,
Like I've been experiencing that. And I I'm not a
(25:35):
doctor person, so I'm not the person that's been like, hey,
I've been to every specialist to see what's wrong with me.
I pooh, no thanks. I've just honestly, I have suffered
silently because I just didn't feel like it was bad enough,
or I didn't even know that some of those things
(25:57):
were a problem. I just thought it was me getting
old or you know whatever. So yeah, lots of our
home moments definitely a lot of relief, like oh my god, Okay,
now I know, you know, And I realized we can't
blame every little thing on these breast implants, because there
are going to be some natural mishaps as we get older,
(26:24):
but definitely too many to be a coincidence, right, you know.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
So let me ask you this, because you do have
your list in front of you right now that I
don't mind if you can share what was the symptoms
that you had, So even if our listeners right now
are listening.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
And they can say wait a minute, I'm going through
that same thing. That's alluma is going through.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
I definitely had a lot of shortness of breath in
the last six months. I'm not kidding. I literally would
get winded walking upstairs. And I'm not terribly out of shape.
I mean, I'm still pretty decent shape and I'm not
that old. I don't smoke, I don't drink, so to
(27:10):
have that that was like, what the hell's going on?
You know? I had a lot of you know, I
hear people talking about clearing their throat constantly or not
being able to swallow. I always had glue in my throat.
That's still a way I could describe it. I always
felt like I had glue in there. I So in
(27:33):
the last year or so, I started getting a lot
of like little freckles, a lot of freckles, but down
underneath my breast look like underneath just there, not anywhere
else in my body. I don't have a lot of freckling,
but there were like those little red pigment things. I
don't know what they are. And strangely, that's also on
(27:57):
the list. So chronic neck and back pain. My shoulders
were always really bad. Now, obviously the weight weight is
kind of, you know, do some things to you. But
because I had the contracture with the capsules, they were
pulling on different parts of my chest, and you know,
(28:21):
the way it was just explained to me is that
it's basically like you're a marionette inside and it's pulling
on all these different parts of you and pulling you
out of whack, and you know, tugging on things that
you shouldn't have anything in there, pulling on your body
parts like that chronic fatigue inflammation. I mean, I just
(28:44):
did it before and after picture earlier today. My face
was so puffy the day of my surgery that I
almost didn't even recognize myself. Joint pain, you know, brain fog.
I'll tell you a quick little thing. I was driving
to my friend's house one day from another part of town.
(29:07):
I started to get on the on the highway and
I was like, wait a minute, I don't remember which
way I'm supposed to go. I drove back and forth
on the on the bridge on the overpass like four
times before I finally realized I was supposed to go
that way. It would just be the most random brain farts,
(29:29):
and it was really bad, and it was kind of
alarming because you know, I'm too young for Alzheimer's. I mean,
just in my head, I was like, please tell me
it's that Alzheimer's because that's horrible. But you know, just
random things like that, I will say that. And this
one is kind of sensitive. But I had had very
(29:53):
low libido for a very long time before I left
my life relationship. I just thought it was like, oh,
you know, there's something wrong with me. I've just had
zero And that was that one was kind of a
tough pill to swallow, but you know, and then I
had the night sweats I've had. I had vertigo really bad,
(30:17):
just random bouts of vertigo, and I had it so
severe when I moved from the West Coast to the Midwest.
I had it the whole time I drove here, and
oh it was awful.
Speaker 2 (30:32):
I'm like, how did you do that?
Speaker 4 (30:34):
I went to the doctor and they they didn't know
anything about it. They were like, well, you know, you
just need to do this, do a couple of these
upply maneuvers and you should be fine. But I tried
everything and it's just and then I just kept having
vertigo spells. That's probably that was probably one of the
hardest things to deal with, because if anybody's had the dizzies,
(30:57):
you know, yeah, sucks, it sucks. Yeah, so, you know,
and there's other things. You know, I've had insomnia for years.
I have been sleeping a lot deeper lately, so that's nice.
Still get up a couple times in the night, but
that's because I'm trying to stay hydrated. You know, I
(31:21):
had never discussed this with anybody ever, but you know,
I've heard women say that they had suicidal thoughts and
I've never I've never admitted to it, but I have
had moments in the past where I felt so helpless
(31:43):
that I thought, you know, be easier to just not
feel that way anymore, and it wasn't because I was
feeling so sick. I just felt so overwhelmed, and you know,
I just I'm just so relieved that I don't have
to feel that way anymore, you know. So I really
(32:07):
feel for the women who have had it a lot
harder than I have, but you know, we've all had
a rough go of it.
Speaker 1 (32:13):
Yeah, yeah, you know, again, thank you for just being
so vulnerable but with strength, was so with so much
strength right now, just to even share that with me,
and I can imagine, I truly can.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
I right along with you. I have vertigo and it's
really bad. Even as we.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
Speaking right now, I'm swimming, I'm swimming with it, but
it does and I don't think people understand that it
becomes very disabling. Yes, I shared just the other day
or last week in a conversation that I can truly
understand when about people that are paralyzed from the neck down.
(32:58):
When you your mind wants to do so many different
things but your body won't allow you to do those things.
It's very disheartening and it's very overwhelming. And sometimes you
feel like I just want to go to sleep and
not wake up.
Speaker 4 (33:12):
Yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
And so I understand exactly what that feeling is.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
And then put on top on it, you say I
did this to myself.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
You go through that guilt.
Speaker 1 (33:26):
So now let's talk about you've now made the decision
to have the excellence surgeon. Now you're ready to take
all of this stuff out of there. What fears of
concerns came up for you when you were considering making
this this big decision, even when you knew that it
was the right thing to do. You know, I guess
(33:48):
they want to talk to her.
Speaker 4 (33:50):
I'm sorry I locked him out so they wouldn't be
in here.
Speaker 2 (33:56):
That fear can still show up in very powerful ways.
You how did you did fear come up? And was
that concern for you? And what was it?
Speaker 4 (34:08):
You know, Obviously going into a surgery is scary. I
don't do well with anesthesia, so I was really worried
about being sick because every time I've got under, I've
come out and just you know, puked for twenty four hours.
I mean, my body just like does not like any
(34:28):
of that stuff. I just, I honestly wasn't worried about
what I was going to look like afterwards, because I
knew that it was out of my control, and I
knew that the doctor would do the best he could
with whatever I had to work with. Because I do
(34:50):
see a lot of people, you know, so super concerned
about it, but that's like their only focus. I just
knew that I needed to get healthy and I needed
to be free of these things. And you know, like
I said earlier, I just I can't explain it, but
I just felt like if I could just get them out, yeah,
(35:11):
I will be free. Yes, just freedom. You know, anyone
who's had them out. They understand what I'm talking about,
you know, and you really do feel such a weight
has been lifted off of you emotionally, you know, like
literally and spiritually everything. It's just amazing.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
Yeah, beautiful. So let's talk about your surgery.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Let's talk about the surgery experience only if you if
you're comfortable with sharing it all.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (35:45):
Absolutely, what would you want the listeners to know about
that part of your journey?
Speaker 4 (35:55):
I you know, like I said, it is scary going
into a surgery, but you have to go into it
with an open heart and just trust the process. I
will say that the recovery was more frustrating for me
because I had a lot of trauma where the doctor
(36:18):
did take out that lump for me as well as
do the ex plant in the lift. So I had
a lot of bruising on one side and I had
a lot of seepage on one side. In fact, I
just had my six week postop today. Oh everything's good.
I do still have a small area that is not
closed up all the way. So I just I just
(36:43):
had to lean into you know, am I gonna feel bad?
Am I going to feel good? And whatever I was feeling,
I just accepted it. I think I only cried once about,
you know, the whole process other than today. But I
(37:07):
just anybody going into it, you know, you really just
need to do some research. You need to feel good
about what you're doing and why you're doing it. I
know that if you're not ready, it's not going to
feel right, because I do see a lot of women
who I feel like they kind of rush into it,
but then their expectations are not appropriate or realistic. So
(37:32):
that's probably the biggest thing. You just have to have
realistic expectations. The only thing I expected to feel was
free and healthy.
Speaker 2 (37:42):
So right now, how do you feel? Do you feel free?
Speaker 4 (37:46):
I do? I do. I'm so I'm so happy and
I feel like I look way better than I ever did,
even before implants. So it's funny because I was like, gosh,
it only took me thirty two years to get what
I actually want finally, So yeah, I do. I feel
(38:07):
really really good and I have more energy. I just
am thinking clearly again, which is nice. And now that
I'm kind of you know, there's there's going to be
still along road of recovery because you're not just instantly
fixed in six weeks. You have to stay on top
of everything still, but I just I'm excited about moving
(38:32):
forward from here.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Yeah, so let me ask you this how how?
Speaker 1 (38:37):
And I heard you say that you had moments, but
you know, you had a moment where you cried and
just going through the emotional thing with the healing process.
Speaker 2 (38:45):
How did you nurture and support yourself.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
Through that healing process and what practices or people resources
were most helpful for your recovery.
Speaker 4 (38:57):
I you know, I had some very good friends that
helped me through my recovery, you know, family, and you know,
I had a lot of people that were like, oh,
you know, I'll come visit you. You know, if you
need any help, I'll help you. But honestly, once the
dust settled and my friend went home and everybody had
(39:20):
kind of come and brought food and did a couple
of things. For the first week, I was happy to
be alone. I really just kind of sat in the
in the quiet and took care of myself. I ate good,
I slept when I needed to sleep, I drank lots
of water, I watched whatever I wanted to watch on TV.
And I just I was okay with that. I didn't
(39:42):
feel like I needed a bunch of people around me.
I didn't feel like I needed a ton of people
taking care of me. I prepared for that before the surgery. Okay,
so I felt very prepared at home at least. And
you know, I did pop into the support oops, the
office advocate at my doctor's office. She checked in with me,
(40:06):
and she was wonderful too, just such a such a
great human being. You know, she literally held my hand
while it went into surgery. So that was Laura. That
was Miss Laura. She's the best. I just love her.
She's so sweet.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
Yes, she is.
Speaker 4 (40:24):
She is.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
She is a beautiful soul.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
I had the privilege to be able to interview her
as well for this podcast.
Speaker 4 (40:31):
Oh great.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
She gave some amazing advice and just even her story
as well, just.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
So you know her, you know, being back there.
Speaker 1 (40:40):
I mean she started back when we didn't have any
you know, cell phones were like the flip floones or
the bricks back.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
Then, when she had her you know, her whole.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
Thing with it, and it's just amazing that she's continually
with it, you know, boots down her and her husband.
Speaker 2 (40:54):
So I think it's so amazing.
Speaker 1 (40:56):
That and just how all of us just came across
one of another because I'm originally from Chicago, but I
lived in Las Vegas, and so we even.
Speaker 2 (41:04):
Seeing her posts. She was commenting up under somebody else's
post and a whole nother group.
Speaker 1 (41:09):
Yeah, caused me to go over to that group and
caused me to find doctor Sude, and I knew it
was it was truly supposed to be aligned where I
was supposed to be at.
Speaker 4 (41:19):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, wonderful there We were laughing because when
she asked me how I found him, I said, I
actually found him on Reddit, of all places, because I
was looking for before and after pictures. You know, nobody
wants to go to a doctor if they don't see
his work, So I definitely kind of went down a
(41:46):
rabbit hole on that.
Speaker 5 (41:48):
Then I found the group and I was like, okay,
and yeah, somehow her and I connected on Facebook, and
it took a couple of months before I actually called
the office and had my console though.
Speaker 4 (42:02):
Wow. So yeah, But once I had my consul, I
was like, Okay, what's the next date, here's my credit card.
Speaker 2 (42:12):
I want to do this.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
Now you've had your surgery, you're at home resting everything,
and I know you said this is your six weeks
check up today. What changes begin to emerge for you physically,
emotionally or maybe even spiritually. And how did you how
did your body or your attire being start to transform.
Speaker 2 (42:32):
Have you seen it start to transform as it yet?
Speaker 4 (42:35):
So I when I came out of surgery the next day,
immediately I noticed that I felt better. Wow, back pain,
neck pain, all of that gone. Like I literally went
there and I was so stressed out and I had,
you know, stuff going on with my back and my neck.
(42:56):
None of that, it was all gone, you know. And
it's crazy because you see people stay you know, Oh,
I've noticed so many changes with my breasts every day
or every week, but just the overall changes in your
body and your mind every week has been amazing. The
(43:17):
transformation a week ago was totally different than how I
feel today. And I just I feel better, Like you
just feel a little bit better each week. And you know,
there was of course, we had drains. I had to
put have those drains in. Those things are horrible. I
(43:40):
was so I'm sorry. I don't want to scare anybody.
I was probably more afraid of the dreams for the
whole recovery process than anything else. They weren't that bad.
They're just they're annoying. You know, You've got these tubes
hanging out of you and you've got to go in
and strip thes and do all that, and they're just
(44:03):
kind of they were kind of a nuisance to me.
And once I got them out, it was like an
instant relief, just that, you know, And that was on
day sixteen. The first couple of weeks kind of just
kind of felt like, man, it's taken forever to get
somewhere with this. But I I was kind of obsessive,
(44:25):
and I took pictures of my breasts almost every day
because I wanted to see how the bruising was, you know,
if they were if the shape was changing, you know
that kind of thing. I took pictures in my face
because I wanted to see how much the swelling had
gone down. And you know, Laura had said to me
(44:46):
when I was there, take pictures, document everything, because once
it's gone, you don't have that opportunity anymore. And so
I really kind of grabbed hold of that and did
just that. I documented that everything. So but yeah, I
would definitely say that you know, the transformation, it's going
(45:09):
to be different for everybody, but for me personally, I
just feel like each week has been a blessing in
different ways.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
Yeah, I kind of got emotional when you were saying
about the very next day you felt better like ease,
and I right now, just when you were talking, I
just visualized myself coming out of surgery the very next
day and feeling just so free, like no headaches, no
body aches, no nothing, no not feeling drained, just just
(45:42):
feeling full. I tell my co host on Mondays, doctor Will,
and he asked me what was my intention? What was
I looking for to get from getting, you know, removing
my explience? And I said, first of all, it would
make me complete. It will complete me. I think, out
(46:02):
of all of these years that I've lived my life,
all of the wisdom that I have, just everything that
I've I've accomplished as well as just did my work
on myself and loving myself, that that was the only
part of me that was incomplete. It was like, how
can I talk about self love when I have two
(46:23):
foreign objects in my body? That was a part of
me loving myself because of those things, you understand and
saying why my confidence was that?
Speaker 2 (46:32):
Like that?
Speaker 1 (46:34):
I remember and I say this joke all the time,
I'm eighty percent. But once I take these two out
of this, it's percent is gone.
Speaker 2 (46:42):
I'll be twenty percent after that.
Speaker 1 (46:44):
But I felt you when you said that next day,
that you and that's what I'm excited about.
Speaker 2 (46:49):
That's what my vision to look like is to be.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
You know, I understand that everyone heals differently, you know,
and so for me, I'm actually taking those two months off,
you know, the August and September off and kind of
being to myself and actually really going through the healing
process with eating the ripe foods, even surrounding myself by
(47:16):
amazing people that won't spiritually drained.
Speaker 2 (47:19):
Me at all.
Speaker 1 (47:21):
And so just as you said that, that was that
was very enlightening for me.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
And thank you for sharing that. Yeah, yeah, thank you
for sharing that.
Speaker 1 (47:30):
All Right, So we are at the end of our
our show. We really is, and it because I didn't
even get to ask a lot of questions.
Speaker 2 (47:41):
No, but I'm gonna I'm gonna go no, I'm gonna
say this.
Speaker 1 (47:45):
What would you share with women who are considering expert
surgery but it's still feeling uncertain or scared.
Speaker 4 (47:54):
Well, I think the first thing I would say is
Ask yourself what you're scared of. Is it because you're
afraid of how you're gonna look? Is it because you're
afraid of the financial burden. Are you afraid they're going
to find something? Are you afraid it's not going to
fix you? And and then give yourself some grace and
(48:17):
just know that you know you have to listen to
your body. Just like you said, You've got to listen
to your body and and know that you're you're going
to make the right decision for you. There's no nobody
can tell you what you know you need to do.
You have to listen to your body and know that
that is absolutely the right time for you to do that.
(48:41):
And it's going to be It's going to be fine.
You're gonna be okay. It's not as scary as it seems.
It's going to go by super fast. I can't believe
it's already been six weeks. I was six weeks. I
scheduled mine six weeks out, and every day I was like,
oh my god, I we should hurt up and get here.
(49:03):
And then it was there, and I was like, oh
my god, it's here. But it's you know, it's it's
an amazing experience for me personally, it wasn't super painful,
so I didn't have to take a lot of stuff,
and I just got to sit in my new body
and let it heal and watch it heal and watch
(49:26):
the progression for a new lease on life. And you
know it's worth It's worth every penny, it's worth every
second of your recovery, and you owe it to yourself.
You're absolutely worth it.
Speaker 1 (49:42):
Yeah, beautiful, thank you, thank you for those last words.
I myself right now, I am six weeks out. Yeah, yeah,
as the time of this hating you all.
Speaker 2 (49:55):
Fixed weeks out.
Speaker 1 (49:56):
All right, So Alama, I am so deeply grateful for
you and your courage, your wisdom, and your willingness, Oh
my God, to just share your truth so openly and beautifully.
You know, your journey is truly going to inspire Somebody's
already inspired and empowered me in so many different ways,
but for so many other women that are out there
and learning to trust their own voices and advocate for
(50:19):
their own healing. If listeners right now, if you're listening
and want to connect, and they want to connect with
you or follow your continued journey and learn more about
your Is there a way that they can contact you
or on Facebook or anything like that.
Speaker 4 (50:36):
Yeah, they can reach out to me on Facebook. It's
my profile is public. It's Alma de vous and I'm
in a lot of the BII groups as well, so
you can always search for a Loma and there. There
shouldn't be any other Alomas at least I haven't seen
any in there.
Speaker 2 (50:57):
I actually know Aloma. I grew up with her sister.
We were best friends. Yes, you're the second Alma that
I've ever met walking around here.
Speaker 4 (51:08):
You three was my grandma. Okay, okay, I met another
one through work. She lived in like the Bahamas or
something crazy. But yeah, okay, so yeah, I'm more than
happy to talk to I've already had a lot of
women reach out to me on Facebook and ask me questions.
(51:29):
And it's interesting. Like I said, it's a little community
within a community, and it's it's beautiful. So I'm an
open book.
Speaker 2 (51:38):
Again.
Speaker 1 (51:39):
Thank you again for just sharing your story and tell
my beautiful souls out there. I hope that Alona's story
has reminded you of the incredible power of your own
voice and the wisdom of your own knowing. You know
her journey shows us that radical self trust is. It's
just not a nice idea, it's a revolutionary act. Whether
you considering experts, surgery, or facing any major health decision,
(52:02):
or just simply learning to trust your inner voice more completely.
Remember that you are the ultimate authority on your own experience.
Your body speaks to you constantly. Your intuition guys you continuously,
and your voice, that beautiful, powerful voice that alma has
to be claimed so couragually deserves to be heard and
honored in trust. So let's close this moment where we
(52:26):
start doing I'm just doing it in a month of
July as we do what I call a conclusion closing meditation.
So if you just shared this moment with me as
well as you listeners right now, to just get in
a comfortable position and just close your eyes for a moment.
Place one hand on your throat, in one hand on
(52:48):
your heart, connecting with your voice and your truth. Don't
take three deep attentional breaths, feeling the vibration of your
breath in your throat. Now speak silently to yourself. I
trust my voice, I trust my knowing, I trust my truth.
(53:18):
Feel these words resonateing in your throat. In your heart,
in your entire being. Now act your inner voice, what
do you most want me to know today? And listen
with complete openness to whatever arises a feeling, a word,
(53:45):
a sense, or a simple knowing. Maybe it's encouragement about
a decision that you're facing. Maybe it's guidance about your
health or your life. Maybe it's simply a reminder of
how loved and supported that you are. Whatever your inner
(54:08):
voice shares, receive it with gratitude and.
Speaker 2 (54:12):
Trust this voice. Your voice.
Speaker 1 (54:18):
Is your most reliable guide, your most faithful companion, your
most loving teacher. And I want you to say to yourself,
I honor my voice, I trust my knowing, and I
will listen to my truth with love, in respect, and
(54:43):
feel this commitment settling into your bones, your heart, your
very essence. Your voice matters, Your truth matters.
Speaker 2 (55:00):
Matter.
Speaker 1 (55:02):
Now take one more deep breath, then, carrying this sacred
trust into your week. All right, my beautiful people, thank
you again for just sharing that moment, that closing moment,
for with us right here this week. I just want
you to practice just honoring your voice, both the small
(55:22):
and the significant ways. Each day, ask yourself, what is
my truth about this situation, what do.
Speaker 2 (55:30):
My inner voice won't be to know?
Speaker 1 (55:33):
In practice, speaking your truth with kindness but clarity. Notice
when you want to dismiss your own knowing and choose
to trust instead.
Speaker 2 (55:43):
If a Loma story move you, please.
Speaker 1 (55:45):
Share this episode with someone who might need to hear
about the power of radical self trust. Your sharing could
be a catalyst that helps another woman find her voice
or to trust her own knowing. Remember, my beautiful people,
whether you are facing major life's decisions, are simply learning
to trust yourself more deeply.
Speaker 2 (56:04):
Your voice is your superpower.
Speaker 1 (56:06):
The more that you honor it, the stronger it becomes,
and the more aligned that you are with your life,
and it becomes your authentic truth. Trust your voice, trust
your knowing, trust your magnificent wisdom that you live in.
Speaker 2 (56:19):
And so until next time, keep speaking your truth and
loving you. Have an amazing, amazing day. Thank you again,
Thank you,
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