November 24, 2025 • 51 mins
What if gratitude isn’t just a feeling, but an energy that wants to move through you and become action?
In this powerful Mindset Monday episode, host Naomi Banks closes out the November “Giving Back” series and the final show of the year by exploring how true gratitude naturally overflows into service. This is not about performative “I’m thankful” posts—it’s about becoming a living “thank you” with your life.
Naomi guides you through a grounding heart-centered meditation, then unpacks:
You are blessed, and you are a blessing.
As this year’s “Rebirth” theme closes and next year’s “Reclaimed & Unashamed” begins, this episode invites you to carry a new truth into the next season: service isn’t meant to drain you—it’s meant to renew you.
Listen in if you’re ready to let your grateful heart become giving hands.
Tags:
season of self love, nyomi banks, mindset monday, gratitude, giving back, service, self love, self healing, emotional healing, spiritual growth, breast implant illness, explant journey, abundance mindset, generosity, joy and service, healing journey, women’s empowerment, trauma to purpose, gratitude practice, intentional living, personal growth podcast, mental wellness, self worth, reclaiming your story, rebirth, reclaimed and unashamed
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-season-of-self-love--6003379/support.
"Thank you for spending this time with me on The Season of Self Love. Remember, self-love isn't selfish – it's sacred. You are worthy of the love you so freely give to others.
If today's episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs this reminder. And don't forget to rate and review the show – it helps us reach more beautiful souls.
Connect with me on Instagram @TheRealNyomiBanks and @TheSeasonofSelfLovePodcast
visit theseasonofselflovepodcast.com for resources and our downloadable workbook.
Until Monday – keep choosing YOU.
This is your girl, the goddess Nyomi Banks. Stay in your season."
In this powerful Mindset Monday episode, host Naomi Banks closes out the November “Giving Back” series and the final show of the year by exploring how true gratitude naturally overflows into service. This is not about performative “I’m thankful” posts—it’s about becoming a living “thank you” with your life.
Naomi guides you through a grounding heart-centered meditation, then unpacks:
- How gratitude becomes generosity when we let it move, not just sit inside us
- The difference between serving from guilt vs. serving from gratitude (and why one burns you out and the other fills you up)
- Her personal journey from struggle to purpose to service—from adult industry stigma and shame to spiritual awakening, self-love, and advocacy
- How her grandmother, her explant surgeon Dr. Sood, and BII advocate Laura Bowden shaped her calling and how she now honors them through her service
- Why abundance mindset (“I get to give”) transforms how you show up for others
- How joy, purpose, and healing deepen when you serve from your overflow, not your emptiness
- Write down 10 people or experiences you’re grateful for
- Choose one person to honor by serving someone else in their name
- For every blessing, commit to one act of service—letting gratitude become motion, not just emotion
You are blessed, and you are a blessing.
As this year’s “Rebirth” theme closes and next year’s “Reclaimed & Unashamed” begins, this episode invites you to carry a new truth into the next season: service isn’t meant to drain you—it’s meant to renew you.
Listen in if you’re ready to let your grateful heart become giving hands.
Tags:
season of self love, nyomi banks, mindset monday, gratitude, giving back, service, self love, self healing, emotional healing, spiritual growth, breast implant illness, explant journey, abundance mindset, generosity, joy and service, healing journey, women’s empowerment, trauma to purpose, gratitude practice, intentional living, personal growth podcast, mental wellness, self worth, reclaiming your story, rebirth, reclaimed and unashamed
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-season-of-self-love--6003379/support.
"Thank you for spending this time with me on The Season of Self Love. Remember, self-love isn't selfish – it's sacred. You are worthy of the love you so freely give to others.
If today's episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs this reminder. And don't forget to rate and review the show – it helps us reach more beautiful souls.
Connect with me on Instagram @TheRealNyomiBanks and @TheSeasonofSelfLovePodcast
visit theseasonofselflovepodcast.com for resources and our downloadable workbook.
Until Monday – keep choosing YOU.
This is your girl, the goddess Nyomi Banks. Stay in your season."
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh, what if gratitude isn't a feeling. What if it's energy,
you know, the energy that wants to move, to flow,
to transform into action. What if the most natural response
to being grateful isn't just saying thank you, but becoming
a living thank you through service. Well, welcome back to
(00:22):
the Season and Self Love. I am Naomi, and today
we are closing out on November Giving Back series by
exploring the powerful connection between gratitude and service, from grateful
hearts to giving hands, Let's go there together. Welcome to
the Season and Self Love podcast, the Season of Healing Intentionally.
(00:44):
I am your host, Naomi Banks, and I am so
glad that you are here. This season, we are slowing
down to go deeper. Every Monday and Wednesday, We're creating
a space of intentional healing, authentic conversations, and the kind
of self love that transformed from the inside out. This
(01:05):
podcast is brought to you by Axs, Naomi and Elevate
Me Self Discovery. Well. We believe that loving yourself intentionally
is a foundation of true transformation. So whether you're on
your own journey of rebirth, navigating life transitions, was simply
choosing yourself, this is your safe space. So get comfort,
(01:27):
grab your favorite beverage, and let's heal together intentionally because
you've deserved to embrace that beautiful person that you are.
Now let's get started, all right, my beauty people. Well,
welcome back to the Season and Self Love Podcast. I
am your host, Namibanks, and I am I'm truly excited.
(01:48):
I'm excited about two things. I'm truly excited about this
Monday this week is Thanksgiving. It. I know we're not
supposed to get thanks but it is. This is a
month of Thanksgiving, being appreciative of Grady to but also
also I want to give this This is our last
show for the year. We will return back next year,
(02:10):
continuing this series, excuse me, and continuing this season for it.
I have a lot of things going on next month
with my healing journey and doing some other things, so
we will dedicate we will come back, excuse me. We
will come back in January, full force and ready to go.
And by that time, hopefully doctor Will is back with
(02:30):
us on Mondays. Here on the Season and Self Love.
But before we get into this topic, we're talking about
gratitude and how thank you shows up in service. I
want us to just ground ourselves for a moment, all right.
So wherever you are at this moment, at this time,
you can just if you feel comfortable enough to close
your close your eyes and just get comfortable, please do
(02:53):
so at this moment, all right. But then through your nose,
I'm going to hold it at the top and release
it slowly through your mouth. Let's try that again. Let's
breathe in through your nose, hold it at the top,
now release it slowly through your mouth. Now, I want
(03:16):
you to place your hand on your heart, feel that
connection to yourself, to this moment, to your life. And
I want you to think of three things that you're
grateful for right now. They don't have to be big,
(03:37):
they can be simple. Maybe it's your health, Maybe it's
your home. Maybe it's the sunrise you saw this morning,
or the coffee in your cup, or even the person
who texts you in just to check in. But just
three things. And I want you to notice them. But
(03:58):
not only notice them, I want you to them. I
want you to feel the warm, that fullness in your chest. Yeah,
that's gratitude, that's appreciation for what is Now. I want
(04:19):
you to think of someone who served you, someone who
showed up for you, someone who changed your life in
big ways of small ways. Maybe it's a grandmother who
raised you, a teacher who believed in you, a friend
(04:41):
who held you when you were breaking, a stranger who
words reached you at exactly the right moment. I want
you to see their face, see their face, remember what
they did for you, and feel that gratitude for their gift.
(05:04):
That gratitude you feel, it's not meant to stay inside
of you. It's energy, and energy wants to move. It
wants to flow through you and out into the world.
It wants to become something. Gratitude naturally becomes generosity winning
(05:26):
when we let it flow, and when we don't hold
it in, we don't keep it to ourselves, it transforms
in action. Now, these next breaths, I want you to
breathe in thanksgiving. I want to feel yourself up with
(05:46):
appreciation for all that you receive when you breathe out.
I want you to breathe out giving. I want you to
feel that energy moving through you, ready to pour it
into others. You see, you have received so much, even
(06:06):
if it doesn't always feel like it, even in the
hard seasons, even in the struggles you have received, and
now now you give, not from application, not from guilt,
but from overflow from gratitude. Now I want to take
(06:32):
one more deeper then, and when you are ready, gently
open your eyes. Happy Monday, y'all. You know again this
is I find him one day here just in this
year period. And it's been an amazing year thus far.
It truly has with my rebirth. The rebirth is what
(06:53):
we call this this year and next year. I'm going
to announce it right now. Next year is all about
reclaimed and unashamed for our entire year. I'm excited to
announce some things coming up in January, just making sure
that we have everything in line before we make the
big announcement of those. But I'm just excited. I'm just excited.
(07:17):
I'm excited that we are here today, just everything, and
I know I'm getting a little tongue tired of things,
but can you believe that we are already here? Don't it
seem like it went so fast in the beginning of
that Can you remember the beginning of the year has
started off in January and where we are now, where
(07:38):
we are now, Where we are now? But this loan,
this month alone has been a journey. We started off
by talking about why why giving back is the ultimate
act of self love, right, and then we explore finding
your service sweet spot, your unique way of just showing up.
And then we dove deep down into how community, how
(08:00):
community is a mineral right, And now today we are
bringing it all together with the foundation that makes it
all of its sustainable gratitude. You know, November is the
month of gratitude and giving right, and that's not a coincidence.
Those two things are deeply connected. They are deeply connected.
They are two sides of the same coin. See, when
(08:24):
we're truly grateful, not just performative posting, you know, our
thankful list on social media, but deeply we are soulfully grateful, right,
that service becomes natural, it becomes inevitable. So let me
tell you about my grandmother, all right. She was one
that was full of wisdom, you know, the kind that
(08:45):
couldn't be taught in books, the kind that came from
life and spirit and just a deep knowing type of woman. Right.
You know. One of the things that she used to
say to me about cabbage, Yes, cabbage, she'd said, baby,
you got to know when to plant your seas and
when to harvest your crops. Everything has its seasons, and
(09:07):
if you're grateful for the harvest, you take care of
the soil. Listen to that. If you are grateful for
the harvest, you take care of the soil. See when
I think about all the time, I think about all
the time because my life has been seasoned, my services
(09:30):
has been seased, all of it has been rooted in
gratitude for the soil that I nurtured, the people who
had poured into me, the experience that shaped me, the
healing that transformed me, and my grandmother. My grandmother served
me by passing down her wisdom, and now I serve
(09:51):
others by sharing what she taught me. That's the connection.
That's gratitude and motion. Well, today we're going to explore
on how gratitude and service are intertwined, On how a
grateful heart naturally leads to a given hand and how
giving actually how it actually creates more to be grateful for.
(10:16):
It's a cycle, it's a flow and law. Is it beautiful?
So let's get into it. So let's talk about gratitude
as a foundation. We're going to start here, how gratitude
is the foundation of a sustainable service. So when we
recognize our blessings, when we truly see what we've been given,
(10:38):
what we survive, what we become, we want to share it. Right,
It's almost instinctive that is what we want to do.
I know when I first got my spiritual awakening and
all of these new things, especially talking about self love,
I wanted to share it right away. When I talk
about shared, I wanted to get on the phone and
(10:59):
I was calling everybody. Then I said, okay, let me
share it in my Axe Naomi podcast my self Love.
Wait a minute, hold on't let me create the season
and self love. I wanted everybody to be a witness
of my healing journey. I wanted everybody to be a
witness or how blessed I was to be where I
(11:22):
am today or even at that moment. Then, So when
we think about it now, when something is so good
and it happens to you, that is our first impulse. Impulse,
So what's yours? It's to tell somebody, right, is to
share the joy, to bring someone else into that goodness. See,
(11:47):
that's the gratitude that's become generosity, that's that natural fluw.
But here's the thing. If you are serving. If you
are serving from guilt, from obligation, from a sense of
I should or I have to, then that's not it.
(12:09):
That's not sustainable. You will burn out, you know, we
talked about that in week two. You'll burn out. But
when you are serving from gratitude, when your service flows
from a deep appreciation for what you receive, that's renewable energy.
(12:31):
It doesn't deplete you. That's what actually fills you up.
So I'm want to share you a journey of my
own journey as an example, and we go to college.
From struggle to purpose to service, that's been my past,
and I'm gonna say it again, from struggle to purpose
to service, that's my past. So the struggle, it's been
(12:53):
years into the dot industry, disconnected myself from people, the shame,
the pain, the feeling of being trapped, and when I
say being trapped, being trapped into a life that people
think that I should be in, if that makes sense,
and I didn't want to be in that life that
(13:14):
people automatically assume that I was a part of. And
I'm gonna say this, just because I was in the
adult industry doesn't mean that I was a bad person.
And the people that's in the adult industry. Not all
of them are bad people, you understand, But I wanted
(13:37):
to disconnect myself from that stigma, if that makes sense.
So the struggle for me have been not that I
was in the adult industry, but the stigma that comes
with it, the stigma that comes with it that I
wanted to disconnect myself with. I wanted to disconnect myself
from the shame that car a pain in my life,
(14:02):
and that pain that was caused because it made me
feel that I was trapped in this box, that I
was trapped in this box. And then let's talk about
the service. The purpose excuse me, the purpose were realizing
that my pain had a meaning, that my journey could
(14:25):
help someone else, that I wasn't just surviving, that I
was preparing to serve. And then the next one is
the service. And that's everything that I do now, the podcast,
the advocacy work, the safe spaces I create, the women
I walk through their own explant journeys, my clients that
(14:49):
want information or to get comfortable with their sexuality or
how they talk to their wife or their spouse, or
even on how the a relationship with themselves. But with
fuels all that where I am able to be able
(15:09):
to talk it so freely. It's fuels like gratitude, Gratitude
for the healing that I've experienced, gratitude for the people
who held space for me when I was following apart,
gratitude for the second chance and life at wholeness, at
(15:30):
my authenticity. So when I am supporting the women who
are scared about their expert surgery, I'm not doing it
because I should. I'm doing it because I'm so grateful
that someone did it for me. And that's gratitude. That's
the gratitude that wants to move, that wants to become action.
(15:54):
That's what I want you to understand. Gratitude for your healing,
whatever your healing looks like, that naturally fuse your service.
So when you've been lost and someone help you find
your way, you want to help others find theirs too.
Right exactly, so, when you've been broken and you experience restoration,
(16:19):
you want to hold space for others who are breaking.
And when you've been seen in your full humanity by
someone who didn't judge you, you want to create that
space for others. That's gratitude and action, that service rooted
in thanksgiving and a thanksgiving. And here's what powerful about it. See,
(16:46):
when your service comes from a place of gratitude, it
doesn't feel like a sacrifice. It feels like a privilege.
You get to do this, You get to pass on
what was given to you. You get to be a
part of someone else's healing journey. And that is not
a person. That is a blessing. It is not a burden.
(17:08):
It is a blessing. So if you've been struggling to
find that motivation to serve, if giving back feels heavy
or it feels like an obligation, I want you to
check your foundation. I want you to check your foundation
are you Are you serving from gratitude or what are
(17:30):
you serving from guilt? And that's the question I'm going
to ask again, and I want to try to think
about this. Are you serving from gratitude or are you
serving from guilt? Because gratitude makes service sustainable. Gratitude makes
(17:51):
service joy. When I'm on this podcast, when I'm on Asks,
Nami Vision and Gap podcast, I feel joy. I get joy.
I get joy of talking about the things that I've
been through. I talk about the joys of the lessons
that I've learned. I get joy with sharing my authenticity
(18:14):
on how I got through it, and I know when
I begin with Body Choice and Voice podcast, that's coming
from a place of gratitude that gives me joy. So
let's talk about honoring those who served you. Let's talk
(18:36):
about the one of the most empowerful motivation of service
is honoring those who serve you. Because here's the truth.
You didn't get here alone, none of us did. Remember
last week I talked about how our community mirrors one another,
how we mirror one another in those communities. So how
(18:57):
somebody showed up for you, How somebody showed up for you,
How somebody believed in you, had somebody poured into you
when they didn't have to. That's also a part of
that community that we talked about last week that also
mirrored you. And one of the most beautiful ways to
(19:18):
honor them is by doing for others what they did
for you. So let me tell you about three people
who served me in ways that still guide my work today. First,
I want to tell you about my grandmother. I already
mentioned her, but I do need to go deeper. She
didn't just pass down her wisdom about cabbage and seasons.
(19:39):
She passed down spiritual guidance. She taught me to trust
my intuition, to honor my ancestors, and to create alters
in sacred spaces. She taught me that the divine is
personal and intimate and not just institutional. When my grandmother
(20:01):
passed away, I remember promising her that I would carry
forward what she gave me, that I wouldn't let her
wisdom die with her. So when I sit at my
altar every morning, when I guide women to connect with
their own spirituality, when I died men to connect with
their own spirituality, when I talk about intuition and divine downloaws,
(20:26):
that's me honoring my grandmother. That's her living through my service.
That's me paying it for that honor those who poured
in to me. And that's what it looks like for
you paying it for honor those who poured into you.
And second, I want to talk about doctor Sude, my
experience surgeon, This man who literally removed the implants that
(20:50):
was poisoned in my body. But more than that, he
gave me something that I desperately needed. And it's gonna
shock y'all when I say this validation. He believed me
when others doctors dismissed. He saw my systems. That's real.
He operated with the do no harm principle. That restored
(21:13):
my faith in the medical field at least some now.
When I advocate for women with breast implact illness, when
I help them find surgeons who will listen, when I
validate their experience, that's my honoring Doctor Suede. That's me
passing on the gifts that he gave me. And Third,
(21:36):
missus lower Boden Voden, and I'm always saying name right,
Miss Laura Voden. She was a BII advocate who came
before me. She was vocal, she was tireless, she was
unafraid to speak truth about what breast implants were doing
to her women's body, to her body, to women's body.
(22:00):
And when she was ready to step back, when her
season of advocacy was coming to a close, I heard it.
She passed the baton on to me. But not only
to me, but to so many different amazing women that's
out there that have been through the same journey that
I have. We didn't have no ceremony, we didn't have
(22:22):
any of that, but energetically she gave that to me,
and I felt it. She served the bi community, breast
inplant illness community with everything that she had, and now
I'm doing the same. I'm carrying that torch that she lit.
(22:43):
But what is so amazing that I'm not the only
one that is carrying that torch that she herself literally
created a ripple effect. That's legacy. That's how we honor
those who serve us by becoming the next link in
(23:04):
the chain. And here's what I want you to think about.
Who served you, who showed up for you, who changed
your life, and how can you honor them by doing
for others of what they did for you. Maybe your
mom worth three jobs so she can go to college.
(23:26):
Honor her by mentoring a young person who needs guidance.
Or maybe it's a teacher who believed in you when
no one else did. Honor them by believing in someone
who's doubted themselves. Or maybe a friend, a friend who
held you through your darkest season, honored them by being
that friend for someone else. You don't have to serve
(23:49):
them the exact same way, but you can carry forward.
You can carry forward that spirit of what they gave you.
That's how we keep their impact alive. That's how we
multiply their generosity. And here's something so beautiful when you honor,
(24:10):
When you honor someone by serving others in their name,
it keeps your connection to them alive too. My grandmother
passed many years ago, but every time I help a
woman to her spirituality, but every time I help a
man in today's spirituality, every time I talked about my
ancestors and authors, she's alive writing that her service continues
(24:34):
through mind where Doctor Sue probably has no idea on
how many women that I've helped because of what he
did for me, but he's part of every single one
of those stories. And miss Laura might not even know that.
I see myself as carrying her the time, but she's
moving into a fabric of my advocacy work and other women.
(24:58):
I can't just hold this because I know, oh other
women are doing the same, because I see them. That's
the power of honoring those who serve you through your
own service. It creates an unbroken chain of impact that
spans generations. So who are you honoring? Whose service are
(25:20):
you caring for it, Whose impact are you multiplying. I
want you to think about it. I want you to
write their names down and let that let that be
your gratitude fuel for you giving. So now let's talk
about it abundance mindset. We're gonna shift it a little bit.
(25:45):
Don't shift everything to the abundance mindset, because gratitude isn't
just about appreciating what you have, but it's about recognizing
that there's enough, that you have enough, and that you
are an and from that place of enoughness you can
give freely. Gratitude it opens the door of abundance. It
(26:10):
shifts you from that scarcity thinking that I don't have enough,
that I am not enough, to abundance, thinking to I
have received so much and I have so much to give.
And that's the shift. That is that shift, and that
(26:31):
is how changes how you serve. That is how it
changes how you serve. We talked about this before. Service
from scarcity looks like this is what it looks like.
If I give this away, I'll have less if I
help them, who's going to help me? I can't afford
(26:54):
to be generous. Service come from abundance and it looks
like I've been given so much I can share freely
and there's enough for everyone. I want to start right
here for a moment, there's someone that I watch all
the time. I think his name is Zach. I think
(27:16):
his name is Zach. He's an influencer and I love
what he does out there, I really do. He He
pretends to be homeless and he will go up to
strangers and ask them for money. And it's just so
beautiful to see a lot of these people would hardly anything,
(27:38):
would give their laves to a stranger. For me, that
shows just that shows how that there still excuse me,
that there is still love and humanity out for one another,
that there is still hope for us in a world
that we look at that's so broken and so damage
and so hurt, that there still are people out there
(28:01):
that are giving back. And when I look at some
of the stories of how many lives that not only
he helped save and change, but also with the community
what they have done. I've saw what he have payd
over half a million dollars for someone have given him homes.
(28:25):
That's part of the service that I don't want to do.
You know, I like that service, but I know I
have to start somewhere, and this right here, this is
good enough for me, right here, because I know that
it's going to continue to build as I continue to
give from a place of love, from a place of abundance,
(28:53):
that I'm not giving from a place of scarcity, or
I'm not given from a place of guilt. And when
I look at this young man doing the things that
he do, I say, yeah, he's given from a place
of abundance. So that was one example of what service
(29:16):
from abundance look like. But this is what it would
say for you in your mindset. I've been given so
much that I can share freely. I have been given
so much that I can share freely, and there is
enough for everyone. So when I go down and I
(29:39):
look down my lifetime timeline of journey and all of
the people, and I know I just named three my grandmother,
doctor Sude, and Laurel, but it's so many more before
that that have given to me, have talked to me.
I shared some of them went through last week. But
(29:59):
also when I think about my life, I think about
the experiences in my life, whether they were trying or triumphy,
They're giving me something. They give me abundance, they give
me joy, they give me a testimony, And so I'm grateful.
(30:25):
But now I want you to see the difference between
how you're giving. When when you're grateful, and you're truly grateful,
you start to see the abundance everywhere that you start
to notice all of the ways that you've been providing for,
all the ways that you've been blessed, all the resources
that have been available to you, all from the place
(30:49):
that's giving becomes natural, It becomes joyful. Let me tell
you the difference between service from gratitude and service from guilt,
because they can look the same on the outside but
feel completely different on the inside. Service from guilt says
(31:14):
I should help because I have more than they do
and that's not fair. Service from gratitude says, I am
so grateful for what I have and I want to share.
Service from guilt says if I don't do this, I'm
a bad person. And can I be very honest with
(31:35):
you all. I remember being in that service from guilt,
being in that space. I remember being in that place.
Now I'm from a service from garitude. I can say this.
(31:59):
I get to do this. Yes, I get to do
this every day. I get to share my voice, I
get to share my story. I get to share my
narrative of what that looks like. I get to share
my healing. I get to share my authenticity. And you
know what that is. That's a privilege. I have that privilege.
(32:22):
But you also have that privilege too. But also, service
from guilt it depletes you, it makes you resentful. But
service from gratitude it energizes you. It makes you so
much more grateful. And here's the beautiful cycle of it.
(32:43):
All given creates more to be grateful for. So when
you serve someone, when you make a difference in someone life,
you don't just help them. You receive something too. You
receive purpose, connection joy, meaning, so you become grateful for
(33:06):
the opportunity to serve, which makes you want to serve more,
which gives you more to be grateful for. And that's
a cycle. It's a cycle, it's a flow. It's the
abundance a mindset in action. It is that abundance mindset
(33:27):
in action. And I see this in my own life
all the time. When I will be hosting the Purpose
Rebirth Retreat and watch women transform over a weekend, I
will walk away grateful, grateful that I got to be
(33:47):
a part of their journey, Grateful for the trust that
they placed in me, Grateful for the privilege of holding
that space and their act gratitude fuse for my next retreat,
my next podcast, so my next active service. And it's
not draining me. It's renewing. That's what happened when you
(34:10):
serve from abundance instead of scarcity, when you give gratitude
instead of guilt. So here's my question for you. What's
your mindset around giving? What is your mindset to around giving?
Do you give from a place of I don't have enough,
(34:34):
but I should anyway, or from a place of I
have been blessed and I get to share Because that
shift in perspective, that shift from scarcity to abundance, from
guilt to gratitude, it changes everything. So I want you
to try this before you serve, before you give, before
(34:59):
you I want you to take a moment to be grateful,
and I want you to reflect on what you received,
reflect on what you received, and then I want you
to remember how far, how far have you come? And
I want you to appreciate what you have and then
give from that overflow and watch how different it feels.
(35:26):
I want to share this story with you. You are
real fast. Just the other day it had rained here,
It hadn't rained here in a long time. But they
had been raining all week long for a good four
or five days, and I remember opening up the curtains
out in my slackenings door to the back door out
of the kitchen, and I remember looking at it was
very gloomy, very gloomy, And when I looked outside, the
(35:50):
backyard looked so beautiful. That oasis looked so beautiful. Even
even when it was so outside, I saw nothing but light.
I felt so grateful for just me being here, standing there,
(36:10):
to be able to even look at something that would
be considered so dark and gloomy, and I was able
to see it as a light. I don't know if
y'all even hear me when I say this, but my
vision is different, if that makes sense. The way that
I view things is different. So when you're coming from
(36:36):
a place a gratitude of abundance, of love, of authenticity
of this is what I truly want to do and be,
you start to look at things different, your perspective and
your vision. So when I looked outside and it was
(36:56):
raining and gloomy, I didn't see that, and I took
a picture of it, and that picture reflected exactly what
I seen, Exactly what I see, and I meant to
post it the other day and I didn't, so I
think I'm gonna post it today. I think I'm gonna
post it today on my timeline. But it was so amazing.
(37:19):
But when you do, when you begin to start serving,
and this is my thing. I love to hear back
from you all. I love to hear the letters that
you are write me. I love to hear it. And
I know someone. I haven't gotten back to all of
them just yet, but I will get back to every
single one of you because I love to hear that.
You know why I love to hear that because I
(37:40):
know that my story is not wasted. I know that
my journey is not wasted. I know that. And if
I know if it fuls me, I know that it's
going to fuel you, which is going to fuel someone else,
and that will be a part of that ripple effect
that we are always talk about. That's about that pay
(38:02):
it forward. That's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm
talking about changing the world. All right, So let's talk
about joy and generosity. And I want to close out
this main content and I want to talk about something
that we don't talk about enough when we talk about
(38:23):
joy and generosity. It's not a secret because sometimes people
think it's a secret. Okay, let's say this. People say,
how do you find your joy? And it's joy generous?
Can't we be generous without joy? The thing is is
that serving others it feels good right, making a difference,
(38:44):
It fills you up. Generosity is our own reward. I'm
not talking about the performative. I want you to, you know,
to perform there. Look at me being a good person. Hey,
look at be being good? Look at be on it
this podcast talking about this good self love shit. Sorry
I said that. I'm talking about that deep soul level
(39:08):
satisfaction that comes from knowing you matter to someone, that
you made their daylighter, that you made their journey easier.
That feeling, that's joy, and it's not selfish. Promise y'all,
(39:29):
that is not selfish. It's not selfish to acknowledge that
it's honest. So, yes, when we serve others, we serve
others because it's needed, But we also serve because we
need it. We need purpose, we need connection, We need
to know that our lives matter beyond ourselves. Did y'all
(39:53):
hear me when I said that We need to know
that our lives matter beyond ourselves, and service gives us that.
When I think about the retreats that's coming up, the
transformation events that I will be hosting for women that
(40:16):
I'll be hosting for men, helping them to come to
share their old identities and step into new ones. I
can tell you that to do that not only does
it help them, but it's helped me. It helps me
(40:40):
as well. I don't only do it to help them.
I'm telling you this is a part of my journey.
One of my good friends say, always healing, I have
to be. Two of my good friends say, for every healing,
are always healing, And this is true. So me being
(41:02):
a service, me sitting on this podcast talking, me standing
in those rooms, me sitting with a client. That's a
part of my healing. But I also do it because
watching someone having a breakthrough, watching them realize their power,
(41:24):
watching them choose themselves for the first time. You know
what that does? That fills my cup in ways that
nothing else does. Imagine that. Imagine allowing someone else's journey
help fill your cup. That's joy. That's that gift that
(41:50):
I receive when I give, and I am not ashamed
about it. I am not ashamed of that at all,
because it's part of that cycle. It's a part of
that abundance mindset. So when you give, you receive, not
because you're trying to get something bad, but because of
(42:11):
generosity naturally creates joy. Wants you to think about the
last time that you help someone. Maybe you pay for
someone groceries, maybe you listen to a friend who was struggling,
or maybe you mention someone at work. Didn't you feel
good afterward? Didn't something in you light you up? That's
(42:32):
not ego. That's the natural high of being human in
the best possible way. That is your soul celebrating its purpose.
So don't run from that joy. Don't run from that joy,
don't downplay it. Let yourself feel it. Service is my joy,
(42:57):
Service is my purpose. Service is my prayer. And when
I'm in it, when I'm podcasting, when I'm coaching, when
i'm holding space, when I'm advocating, I am filled, I
am energized, I am alive. That's what service from gratitude
(43:18):
looks like. It's not a modern energy, it's a celebration energy.
So as we close out this giving back series, I
want you to remember. I want you to remember this.
This service isn't supposed to train you, it's supposed to
(43:39):
feel you. It's not bringing you joy. Check your foundation.
Check your foundation, check your mindset. Check whether you're giving
from gratitude or guilt, or from abundance or scarcity. Because
when you get it right, when you get it right,
(44:02):
when you say when you serve from a sweet spot,
from your overflow, from the grateful heart that you have,
it becomes one of the most joyful parts of your life.
And when I say this, I say this truth because
that's joy. It's contagious, and it inspires others to serve.
(44:24):
You know what it does again, it creates more ripples.
And that's that beautiful cycle that we've been talking about
all month. That's that beautiful cycle that we've been talking
about all year. And it all starts with gratitude, all right.
So let's make this practical so you know, we talk,
(44:45):
we take this gratitude from feeling to action, all right.
So here's what I want to ask you to do
this week. I want you to write down ten people
or experiences that you're grateful for, not just the obvious one.
I want you to dig deep dig deep down in there,
deep deep down in there. Who taught you something important,
(45:07):
who showed you kindness when you needed it, and who
challenged you in ways that made you crow. What experience
has shaped you, What hardships actually lead to a breakthroughs,
What moments change your perspective. I want you to write
them down, ten of them ten, one to three, seventy nine, ten,
(45:31):
and let yourself really feel their gratitude as you write it.
This isn't just a list. This is for you to
acknowledge your blessings. This is for you to recognize all
of the ways that you've been served, supported in shaped.
Now I got to action for you, not the one
this section. I want you to choose one person to
(45:54):
honor by serving someone else in their name. Look at
your list of ten and I want you to choose
one person who really stands out. And then this week,
I want you to serve someone else in their honor.
If it's your grandmother that taught you to cook a
meal for someone who needs it and say, this is
the honor of my grandmother. If it's a teacher that
(46:14):
believed in you, mentor someone and think of your teacher
while doing it. And if it's a friend that hells
space for you and pain. I want you to hold
space for someone else and let that be your thank
you to your friend. You're not doing this for recognition.
You're doing it as an act of gratitude. You're continuing
(46:39):
their impact. So I want you to create a we're
gonna call thiss a gratitude to action plan for every blessing,
one act of service. This is about creating a sustainable practice.
So every time you notice a blessing, every time you
feel grateful for someone, ask yourself, how can I pass
(47:02):
this forward? How can I pay this forward? I'm grateful
for your health, donate to a health organization or support
someone in a health crisis. I'm grateful for your home.
Volunteer at a shelter or help someone who's housing is insecure.
I'm grateful for your education. Tutor someone, or share your
(47:22):
knowledge freely. For every blessing, one act of service, that's
gratitude and action. Floor Try it this week. Just try
it and notice how it feels. Notice how gratitude and
service take start to be so inseparable. Remember I said
(47:43):
earlier about two sides of one coin. On one side
of the coin, that's what this is. That's what this is,
all right, my beautiful people. Before we close this, seal
this in our spirits, put a hand on a heart,
a deep breath in, and I want you to speak
these words with me. All right. I am deeply grateful
(48:08):
for all that I have received. My gratitude, overflows and
generous actions. Honor those who served me by serving others.
My giving hands are guided by my grateful heart. I
live in abundance, and I share abundantly. Service is my joy,
(48:31):
my purpose, my prayer. As I give, I receive as
I serve. I am filled, I am grateful, I am generous,
and I am making a difference. I want you how
to breathe that in and let this be your truth.
(48:58):
And that said, my beautiful people, That's the end of
our November Giving Back series. And that's the end of
this part of this season. We will be coming back.
We will be coming back. We cover so much this month,
from understanding why service is self love, to finding your
unique way to give, to recognizing community as your mirror,
(49:22):
into connecting gratitude with generosity. I hope this series have
shifted something in you. I hope that it's given you
permission to serve in your own way, from your own overflow,
with your own gifts, and I hope it's reminded you
that you are a part of something bigger, that your
life ripples outward, and that your service matters. And as
(49:46):
we head into the new year with new themes, new conversations,
I want you to carry this with you. Gratitude and
service are not separate practices. There are two expressions of
the same truth. You are blessed and you are a
blessed thing. If this series unpacked you please share it,
(50:10):
send it to someone who needs to hear it, and
leave a review, tag me on social media. And most importantly,
let's take action. Don't just consume the content, let it
transform into surface. Let your grateful heart become giving hands again.
I thank you for being here. I thank you for
being a part of this community. I thank you for
(50:32):
being willing to give back. I can't tell y'all enough
how much I love you all. Not gonna make a difference.
This is the season and self love. I am not
only see y'all next year. I have an amazing, amazing
my day. Thank you so much for joining me today
on this journey of intentional healing. I hope that this
(50:54):
conversation has filled your cup and reminded you of the
beautiful and worthy person that you are. I want you
to remember healing isn't about rushing.
Speaker 2 (51:04):
It's about showing up for yourself with love and intention,
one day at a time. So I'll see you back
here Monday and Wednesday for another episode of the Season
of Healing Intentionally right here on.
Speaker 1 (51:20):
The Season of Self Love podcast. So until then, keep
choosing you and visit us at the Season of Self
Love podcast dot com for show notes and resources, and
remember to connect with me on Instagram at the real
Naomi Banks. This has been brought to you by Asks
Naomi and elevating Me self Discovery because your healing matters.
(51:43):
You are loved, you are worthy, and you are exactly
where you need to be. Take care
Oh, what if gratitude isn't a feeling. What if it's energy,
you know, the energy that wants to move, to flow,
to transform into action. What if the most natural response
to being grateful isn't just saying thank you, but becoming
a living thank you through service. Well, welcome back to
(00:22):
the Season and Self Love. I am Naomi, and today
we are closing out on November Giving Back series by
exploring the powerful connection between gratitude and service, from grateful
hearts to giving hands, Let's go there together. Welcome to
the Season and Self Love podcast, the Season of Healing Intentionally.
(00:44):
I am your host, Naomi Banks, and I am so
glad that you are here. This season, we are slowing
down to go deeper. Every Monday and Wednesday, We're creating
a space of intentional healing, authentic conversations, and the kind
of self love that transformed from the inside out. This
(01:05):
podcast is brought to you by Axs, Naomi and Elevate
Me Self Discovery. Well. We believe that loving yourself intentionally
is a foundation of true transformation. So whether you're on
your own journey of rebirth, navigating life transitions, was simply
choosing yourself, this is your safe space. So get comfort,
(01:27):
grab your favorite beverage, and let's heal together intentionally because
you've deserved to embrace that beautiful person that you are.
Now let's get started, all right, my beauty people. Well,
welcome back to the Season and Self Love Podcast. I
am your host, Namibanks, and I am I'm truly excited.
(01:48):
I'm excited about two things. I'm truly excited about this
Monday this week is Thanksgiving. It. I know we're not
supposed to get thanks but it is. This is a
month of Thanksgiving, being appreciative of Grady to but also
also I want to give this This is our last
show for the year. We will return back next year,
(02:10):
continuing this series, excuse me, and continuing this season for it.
I have a lot of things going on next month
with my healing journey and doing some other things, so
we will dedicate we will come back, excuse me. We
will come back in January, full force and ready to go.
And by that time, hopefully doctor Will is back with
(02:30):
us on Mondays. Here on the Season and Self Love.
But before we get into this topic, we're talking about
gratitude and how thank you shows up in service. I
want us to just ground ourselves for a moment, all right.
So wherever you are at this moment, at this time,
you can just if you feel comfortable enough to close
your close your eyes and just get comfortable, please do
(02:53):
so at this moment, all right. But then through your nose,
I'm going to hold it at the top and release
it slowly through your mouth. Let's try that again. Let's
breathe in through your nose, hold it at the top,
now release it slowly through your mouth. Now, I want
(03:16):
you to place your hand on your heart, feel that
connection to yourself, to this moment, to your life. And
I want you to think of three things that you're
grateful for right now. They don't have to be big,
(03:37):
they can be simple. Maybe it's your health, Maybe it's
your home. Maybe it's the sunrise you saw this morning,
or the coffee in your cup, or even the person
who texts you in just to check in. But just
three things. And I want you to notice them. But
(03:58):
not only notice them, I want you to them. I
want you to feel the warm, that fullness in your chest. Yeah,
that's gratitude, that's appreciation for what is Now. I want
(04:19):
you to think of someone who served you, someone who
showed up for you, someone who changed your life in
big ways of small ways. Maybe it's a grandmother who
raised you, a teacher who believed in you, a friend
(04:41):
who held you when you were breaking, a stranger who
words reached you at exactly the right moment. I want
you to see their face, see their face, remember what
they did for you, and feel that gratitude for their gift.
(05:04):
That gratitude you feel, it's not meant to stay inside
of you. It's energy, and energy wants to move. It
wants to flow through you and out into the world.
It wants to become something. Gratitude naturally becomes generosity winning
(05:26):
when we let it flow, and when we don't hold
it in, we don't keep it to ourselves, it transforms
in action. Now, these next breaths, I want you to
breathe in thanksgiving. I want to feel yourself up with
(05:46):
appreciation for all that you receive when you breathe out.
I want you to breathe out giving. I want you to
feel that energy moving through you, ready to pour it
into others. You see, you have received so much, even
(06:06):
if it doesn't always feel like it, even in the
hard seasons, even in the struggles you have received, and
now now you give, not from application, not from guilt,
but from overflow from gratitude. Now I want to take
(06:32):
one more deeper then, and when you are ready, gently
open your eyes. Happy Monday, y'all. You know again this
is I find him one day here just in this
year period. And it's been an amazing year thus far.
It truly has with my rebirth. The rebirth is what
(06:53):
we call this this year and next year. I'm going
to announce it right now. Next year is all about
reclaimed and unashamed for our entire year. I'm excited to
announce some things coming up in January, just making sure
that we have everything in line before we make the
big announcement of those. But I'm just excited. I'm just excited.
(07:17):
I'm excited that we are here today, just everything, and
I know I'm getting a little tongue tired of things,
but can you believe that we are already here? Don't it
seem like it went so fast in the beginning of
that Can you remember the beginning of the year has
started off in January and where we are now, where
(07:38):
we are now, Where we are now? But this loan,
this month alone has been a journey. We started off
by talking about why why giving back is the ultimate
act of self love, right, and then we explore finding
your service sweet spot, your unique way of just showing up.
And then we dove deep down into how community, how
(08:00):
community is a mineral right, And now today we are
bringing it all together with the foundation that makes it
all of its sustainable gratitude. You know, November is the
month of gratitude and giving right, and that's not a coincidence.
Those two things are deeply connected. They are deeply connected.
They are two sides of the same coin. See, when
(08:24):
we're truly grateful, not just performative posting, you know, our
thankful list on social media, but deeply we are soulfully grateful, right,
that service becomes natural, it becomes inevitable. So let me
tell you about my grandmother, all right. She was one
that was full of wisdom, you know, the kind that
(08:45):
couldn't be taught in books, the kind that came from
life and spirit and just a deep knowing type of woman. Right.
You know. One of the things that she used to
say to me about cabbage, Yes, cabbage, she'd said, baby,
you got to know when to plant your seas and
when to harvest your crops. Everything has its seasons, and
(09:07):
if you're grateful for the harvest, you take care of
the soil. Listen to that. If you are grateful for
the harvest, you take care of the soil. See when
I think about all the time, I think about all
the time because my life has been seasoned, my services
(09:30):
has been seased, all of it has been rooted in
gratitude for the soil that I nurtured, the people who
had poured into me, the experience that shaped me, the
healing that transformed me, and my grandmother. My grandmother served
me by passing down her wisdom, and now I serve
(09:51):
others by sharing what she taught me. That's the connection.
That's gratitude and motion. Well, today we're going to explore
on how gratitude and service are intertwined, On how a
grateful heart naturally leads to a given hand and how
giving actually how it actually creates more to be grateful for.
(10:16):
It's a cycle, it's a flow and law. Is it beautiful?
So let's get into it. So let's talk about gratitude
as a foundation. We're going to start here, how gratitude
is the foundation of a sustainable service. So when we
recognize our blessings, when we truly see what we've been given,
(10:38):
what we survive, what we become, we want to share it. Right,
It's almost instinctive that is what we want to do.
I know when I first got my spiritual awakening and
all of these new things, especially talking about self love,
I wanted to share it right away. When I talk
about shared, I wanted to get on the phone and
(10:59):
I was calling everybody. Then I said, okay, let me
share it in my Axe Naomi podcast my self Love.
Wait a minute, hold on't let me create the season
and self love. I wanted everybody to be a witness
of my healing journey. I wanted everybody to be a
witness or how blessed I was to be where I
(11:22):
am today or even at that moment. Then, So when
we think about it now, when something is so good
and it happens to you, that is our first impulse. Impulse,
So what's yours? It's to tell somebody, right, is to
share the joy, to bring someone else into that goodness. See,
(11:47):
that's the gratitude that's become generosity, that's that natural fluw.
But here's the thing. If you are serving. If you
are serving from guilt, from obligation, from a sense of
I should or I have to, then that's not it.
(12:09):
That's not sustainable. You will burn out, you know, we
talked about that in week two. You'll burn out. But
when you are serving from gratitude, when your service flows
from a deep appreciation for what you receive, that's renewable energy.
(12:31):
It doesn't deplete you. That's what actually fills you up.
So I'm want to share you a journey of my
own journey as an example, and we go to college.
From struggle to purpose to service, that's been my past,
and I'm gonna say it again, from struggle to purpose
to service, that's my past. So the struggle, it's been
(12:53):
years into the dot industry, disconnected myself from people, the shame,
the pain, the feeling of being trapped, and when I
say being trapped, being trapped into a life that people
think that I should be in, if that makes sense,
and I didn't want to be in that life that
(13:14):
people automatically assume that I was a part of. And
I'm gonna say this, just because I was in the
adult industry doesn't mean that I was a bad person.
And the people that's in the adult industry. Not all
of them are bad people, you understand, But I wanted
(13:37):
to disconnect myself from that stigma, if that makes sense.
So the struggle for me have been not that I
was in the adult industry, but the stigma that comes
with it, the stigma that comes with it that I
wanted to disconnect myself with. I wanted to disconnect myself
from the shame that car a pain in my life,
(14:02):
and that pain that was caused because it made me
feel that I was trapped in this box, that I
was trapped in this box. And then let's talk about
the service. The purpose excuse me, the purpose were realizing
that my pain had a meaning, that my journey could
(14:25):
help someone else, that I wasn't just surviving, that I
was preparing to serve. And then the next one is
the service. And that's everything that I do now, the podcast,
the advocacy work, the safe spaces I create, the women
I walk through their own explant journeys, my clients that
(14:49):
want information or to get comfortable with their sexuality or
how they talk to their wife or their spouse, or
even on how the a relationship with themselves. But with
fuels all that where I am able to be able
(15:09):
to talk it so freely. It's fuels like gratitude, Gratitude
for the healing that I've experienced, gratitude for the people
who held space for me when I was following apart,
gratitude for the second chance and life at wholeness, at
(15:30):
my authenticity. So when I am supporting the women who
are scared about their expert surgery, I'm not doing it
because I should. I'm doing it because I'm so grateful
that someone did it for me. And that's gratitude. That's
the gratitude that wants to move, that wants to become action.
(15:54):
That's what I want you to understand. Gratitude for your healing,
whatever your healing looks like, that naturally fuse your service.
So when you've been lost and someone help you find
your way, you want to help others find theirs too.
Right exactly, so, when you've been broken and you experience restoration,
(16:19):
you want to hold space for others who are breaking.
And when you've been seen in your full humanity by
someone who didn't judge you, you want to create that
space for others. That's gratitude and action, that service rooted
in thanksgiving and a thanksgiving. And here's what powerful about it. See,
(16:46):
when your service comes from a place of gratitude, it
doesn't feel like a sacrifice. It feels like a privilege.
You get to do this, You get to pass on
what was given to you. You get to be a
part of someone else's healing journey. And that is not
a person. That is a blessing. It is not a burden.
(17:08):
It is a blessing. So if you've been struggling to
find that motivation to serve, if giving back feels heavy
or it feels like an obligation, I want you to
check your foundation. I want you to check your foundation
are you Are you serving from gratitude or what are
(17:30):
you serving from guilt? And that's the question I'm going
to ask again, and I want to try to think
about this. Are you serving from gratitude or are you
serving from guilt? Because gratitude makes service sustainable. Gratitude makes
(17:51):
service joy. When I'm on this podcast, when I'm on Asks,
Nami Vision and Gap podcast, I feel joy. I get joy.
I get joy of talking about the things that I've
been through. I talk about the joys of the lessons
that I've learned. I get joy with sharing my authenticity
(18:14):
on how I got through it, and I know when
I begin with Body Choice and Voice podcast, that's coming
from a place of gratitude that gives me joy. So
let's talk about honoring those who served you. Let's talk
(18:36):
about the one of the most empowerful motivation of service
is honoring those who serve you. Because here's the truth.
You didn't get here alone, none of us did. Remember
last week I talked about how our community mirrors one another,
how we mirror one another in those communities. So how
(18:57):
somebody showed up for you, How somebody showed up for you,
How somebody believed in you, had somebody poured into you
when they didn't have to. That's also a part of
that community that we talked about last week that also
mirrored you. And one of the most beautiful ways to
(19:18):
honor them is by doing for others what they did
for you. So let me tell you about three people
who served me in ways that still guide my work today. First,
I want to tell you about my grandmother. I already
mentioned her, but I do need to go deeper. She
didn't just pass down her wisdom about cabbage and seasons.
(19:39):
She passed down spiritual guidance. She taught me to trust
my intuition, to honor my ancestors, and to create alters
in sacred spaces. She taught me that the divine is
personal and intimate and not just institutional. When my grandmother
(20:01):
passed away, I remember promising her that I would carry
forward what she gave me, that I wouldn't let her
wisdom die with her. So when I sit at my
altar every morning, when I guide women to connect with
their own spirituality, when I died men to connect with
their own spirituality, when I talk about intuition and divine downloaws,
(20:26):
that's me honoring my grandmother. That's her living through my service.
That's me paying it for that honor those who poured
in to me. And that's what it looks like for
you paying it for honor those who poured into you.
And second, I want to talk about doctor Sude, my
experience surgeon, This man who literally removed the implants that
(20:50):
was poisoned in my body. But more than that, he
gave me something that I desperately needed. And it's gonna
shock y'all when I say this validation. He believed me
when others doctors dismissed. He saw my systems. That's real.
He operated with the do no harm principle. That restored
(21:13):
my faith in the medical field at least some now.
When I advocate for women with breast implact illness, when
I help them find surgeons who will listen, when I
validate their experience, that's my honoring Doctor Suede. That's me
passing on the gifts that he gave me. And Third,
(21:36):
missus lower Boden Voden, and I'm always saying name right,
Miss Laura Voden. She was a BII advocate who came
before me. She was vocal, she was tireless, she was
unafraid to speak truth about what breast implants were doing
to her women's body, to her body, to women's body.
(22:00):
And when she was ready to step back, when her
season of advocacy was coming to a close, I heard it.
She passed the baton on to me. But not only
to me, but to so many different amazing women that's
out there that have been through the same journey that
I have. We didn't have no ceremony, we didn't have
(22:22):
any of that, but energetically she gave that to me,
and I felt it. She served the bi community, breast
inplant illness community with everything that she had, and now
I'm doing the same. I'm carrying that torch that she lit.
(22:43):
But what is so amazing that I'm not the only
one that is carrying that torch that she herself literally
created a ripple effect. That's legacy. That's how we honor
those who serve us by becoming the next link in
(23:04):
the chain. And here's what I want you to think about.
Who served you, who showed up for you, who changed
your life, and how can you honor them by doing
for others of what they did for you. Maybe your
mom worth three jobs so she can go to college.
(23:26):
Honor her by mentoring a young person who needs guidance.
Or maybe it's a teacher who believed in you when
no one else did. Honor them by believing in someone
who's doubted themselves. Or maybe a friend, a friend who
held you through your darkest season, honored them by being
that friend for someone else. You don't have to serve
(23:49):
them the exact same way, but you can carry forward.
You can carry forward that spirit of what they gave you.
That's how we keep their impact alive. That's how we
multiply their generosity. And here's something so beautiful when you honor,
(24:10):
When you honor someone by serving others in their name,
it keeps your connection to them alive too. My grandmother
passed many years ago, but every time I help a
woman to her spirituality, but every time I help a
man in today's spirituality, every time I talked about my
ancestors and authors, she's alive writing that her service continues
(24:34):
through mind where Doctor Sue probably has no idea on
how many women that I've helped because of what he
did for me, but he's part of every single one
of those stories. And miss Laura might not even know that.
I see myself as carrying her the time, but she's
moving into a fabric of my advocacy work and other women.
(24:58):
I can't just hold this because I know, oh other
women are doing the same, because I see them. That's
the power of honoring those who serve you through your
own service. It creates an unbroken chain of impact that
spans generations. So who are you honoring? Whose service are
(25:20):
you caring for it, Whose impact are you multiplying. I
want you to think about it. I want you to
write their names down and let that let that be
your gratitude fuel for you giving. So now let's talk
about it abundance mindset. We're gonna shift it a little bit.
(25:45):
Don't shift everything to the abundance mindset, because gratitude isn't
just about appreciating what you have, but it's about recognizing
that there's enough, that you have enough, and that you
are an and from that place of enoughness you can
give freely. Gratitude it opens the door of abundance. It
(26:10):
shifts you from that scarcity thinking that I don't have enough,
that I am not enough, to abundance, thinking to I
have received so much and I have so much to give.
And that's the shift. That is that shift, and that
(26:31):
is how changes how you serve. That is how it
changes how you serve. We talked about this before. Service
from scarcity looks like this is what it looks like.
If I give this away, I'll have less if I
help them, who's going to help me? I can't afford
(26:54):
to be generous. Service come from abundance and it looks
like I've been given so much I can share freely
and there's enough for everyone. I want to start right
here for a moment, there's someone that I watch all
the time. I think his name is Zach. I think
(27:16):
his name is Zach. He's an influencer and I love
what he does out there, I really do. He He
pretends to be homeless and he will go up to
strangers and ask them for money. And it's just so
beautiful to see a lot of these people would hardly anything,
(27:38):
would give their laves to a stranger. For me, that
shows just that shows how that there still excuse me,
that there is still love and humanity out for one another,
that there is still hope for us in a world
that we look at that's so broken and so damage
and so hurt, that there still are people out there
(28:01):
that are giving back. And when I look at some
of the stories of how many lives that not only
he helped save and change, but also with the community
what they have done. I've saw what he have payd
over half a million dollars for someone have given him homes.
(28:25):
That's part of the service that I don't want to do.
You know, I like that service, but I know I
have to start somewhere, and this right here, this is
good enough for me, right here, because I know that
it's going to continue to build as I continue to
give from a place of love, from a place of abundance,
(28:53):
that I'm not giving from a place of scarcity, or
I'm not given from a place of guilt. And when
I look at this young man doing the things that
he do, I say, yeah, he's given from a place
of abundance. So that was one example of what service
(29:16):
from abundance look like. But this is what it would
say for you in your mindset. I've been given so
much that I can share freely. I have been given
so much that I can share freely, and there is
enough for everyone. So when I go down and I
(29:39):
look down my lifetime timeline of journey and all of
the people, and I know I just named three my grandmother,
doctor Sude, and Laurel, but it's so many more before
that that have given to me, have talked to me.
I shared some of them went through last week. But
(29:59):
also when I think about my life, I think about
the experiences in my life, whether they were trying or triumphy,
They're giving me something. They give me abundance, they give
me joy, they give me a testimony, And so I'm grateful.
(30:25):
But now I want you to see the difference between
how you're giving. When when you're grateful, and you're truly grateful,
you start to see the abundance everywhere that you start
to notice all of the ways that you've been providing for,
all the ways that you've been blessed, all the resources
that have been available to you, all from the place
(30:49):
that's giving becomes natural, It becomes joyful. Let me tell
you the difference between service from gratitude and service from guilt,
because they can look the same on the outside but
feel completely different on the inside. Service from guilt says
(31:14):
I should help because I have more than they do
and that's not fair. Service from gratitude says, I am
so grateful for what I have and I want to share.
Service from guilt says if I don't do this, I'm
a bad person. And can I be very honest with
(31:35):
you all. I remember being in that service from guilt,
being in that space. I remember being in that place.
Now I'm from a service from garitude. I can say this.
(31:59):
I get to do this. Yes, I get to do
this every day. I get to share my voice, I
get to share my story. I get to share my
narrative of what that looks like. I get to share
my healing. I get to share my authenticity. And you
know what that is. That's a privilege. I have that privilege.
(32:22):
But you also have that privilege too. But also, service
from guilt it depletes you, it makes you resentful. But
service from gratitude it energizes you. It makes you so
much more grateful. And here's the beautiful cycle of it.
(32:43):
All given creates more to be grateful for. So when
you serve someone, when you make a difference in someone life,
you don't just help them. You receive something too. You
receive purpose, connection joy, meaning, so you become grateful for
(33:06):
the opportunity to serve, which makes you want to serve more,
which gives you more to be grateful for. And that's
a cycle. It's a cycle, it's a flow. It's the
abundance a mindset in action. It is that abundance mindset
(33:27):
in action. And I see this in my own life
all the time. When I will be hosting the Purpose
Rebirth Retreat and watch women transform over a weekend, I
will walk away grateful, grateful that I got to be
(33:47):
a part of their journey, Grateful for the trust that
they placed in me, Grateful for the privilege of holding
that space and their act gratitude fuse for my next retreat,
my next podcast, so my next active service. And it's
not draining me. It's renewing. That's what happened when you
(34:10):
serve from abundance instead of scarcity, when you give gratitude
instead of guilt. So here's my question for you. What's
your mindset around giving? What is your mindset to around giving?
Do you give from a place of I don't have enough,
(34:34):
but I should anyway, or from a place of I
have been blessed and I get to share Because that
shift in perspective, that shift from scarcity to abundance, from
guilt to gratitude, it changes everything. So I want you
to try this before you serve, before you give, before
(34:59):
you I want you to take a moment to be grateful,
and I want you to reflect on what you received,
reflect on what you received, and then I want you
to remember how far, how far have you come? And
I want you to appreciate what you have and then
give from that overflow and watch how different it feels.
(35:26):
I want to share this story with you. You are
real fast. Just the other day it had rained here,
It hadn't rained here in a long time. But they
had been raining all week long for a good four
or five days, and I remember opening up the curtains
out in my slackenings door to the back door out
of the kitchen, and I remember looking at it was
very gloomy, very gloomy, And when I looked outside, the
(35:50):
backyard looked so beautiful. That oasis looked so beautiful. Even
even when it was so outside, I saw nothing but light.
I felt so grateful for just me being here, standing there,
(36:10):
to be able to even look at something that would
be considered so dark and gloomy, and I was able
to see it as a light. I don't know if
y'all even hear me when I say this, but my
vision is different, if that makes sense. The way that
I view things is different. So when you're coming from
(36:36):
a place a gratitude of abundance, of love, of authenticity
of this is what I truly want to do and be,
you start to look at things different, your perspective and
your vision. So when I looked outside and it was
(36:56):
raining and gloomy, I didn't see that, and I took
a picture of it, and that picture reflected exactly what
I seen, Exactly what I see, and I meant to
post it the other day and I didn't, so I
think I'm gonna post it today. I think I'm gonna
post it today on my timeline. But it was so amazing.
(37:19):
But when you do, when you begin to start serving,
and this is my thing. I love to hear back
from you all. I love to hear the letters that
you are write me. I love to hear it. And
I know someone. I haven't gotten back to all of
them just yet, but I will get back to every
single one of you because I love to hear that.
You know why I love to hear that because I
(37:40):
know that my story is not wasted. I know that
my journey is not wasted. I know that. And if
I know if it fuls me, I know that it's
going to fuel you, which is going to fuel someone else,
and that will be a part of that ripple effect
that we are always talk about. That's about that pay
(38:02):
it forward. That's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm
talking about changing the world. All right, So let's talk
about joy and generosity. And I want to close out
this main content and I want to talk about something
that we don't talk about enough when we talk about
(38:23):
joy and generosity. It's not a secret because sometimes people
think it's a secret. Okay, let's say this. People say,
how do you find your joy? And it's joy generous?
Can't we be generous without joy? The thing is is
that serving others it feels good right, making a difference,
(38:44):
It fills you up. Generosity is our own reward. I'm
not talking about the performative. I want you to, you know,
to perform there. Look at me being a good person. Hey,
look at be being good? Look at be on it
this podcast talking about this good self love shit. Sorry
I said that. I'm talking about that deep soul level
(39:08):
satisfaction that comes from knowing you matter to someone, that
you made their daylighter, that you made their journey easier.
That feeling, that's joy, and it's not selfish. Promise y'all,
(39:29):
that is not selfish. It's not selfish to acknowledge that
it's honest. So, yes, when we serve others, we serve
others because it's needed, But we also serve because we
need it. We need purpose, we need connection, We need
to know that our lives matter beyond ourselves. Did y'all
(39:53):
hear me when I said that We need to know
that our lives matter beyond ourselves, and service gives us that.
When I think about the retreats that's coming up, the
transformation events that I will be hosting for women that
(40:16):
I'll be hosting for men, helping them to come to
share their old identities and step into new ones. I
can tell you that to do that not only does
it help them, but it's helped me. It helps me
(40:40):
as well. I don't only do it to help them.
I'm telling you this is a part of my journey.
One of my good friends say, always healing, I have
to be. Two of my good friends say, for every healing,
are always healing, And this is true. So me being
(41:02):
a service, me sitting on this podcast talking, me standing
in those rooms, me sitting with a client. That's a
part of my healing. But I also do it because
watching someone having a breakthrough, watching them realize their power,
(41:24):
watching them choose themselves for the first time. You know
what that does? That fills my cup in ways that
nothing else does. Imagine that. Imagine allowing someone else's journey
help fill your cup. That's joy. That's that gift that
(41:50):
I receive when I give, and I am not ashamed
about it. I am not ashamed of that at all,
because it's part of that cycle. It's a part of
that abundance mindset. So when you give, you receive, not
because you're trying to get something bad, but because of
(42:11):
generosity naturally creates joy. Wants you to think about the
last time that you help someone. Maybe you pay for
someone groceries, maybe you listen to a friend who was struggling,
or maybe you mention someone at work. Didn't you feel
good afterward? Didn't something in you light you up? That's
(42:32):
not ego. That's the natural high of being human in
the best possible way. That is your soul celebrating its purpose.
So don't run from that joy. Don't run from that joy,
don't downplay it. Let yourself feel it. Service is my joy,
(42:57):
Service is my purpose. Service is my prayer. And when
I'm in it, when I'm podcasting, when I'm coaching, when
i'm holding space, when I'm advocating, I am filled, I
am energized, I am alive. That's what service from gratitude
(43:18):
looks like. It's not a modern energy, it's a celebration energy.
So as we close out this giving back series, I
want you to remember. I want you to remember this.
This service isn't supposed to train you, it's supposed to
(43:39):
feel you. It's not bringing you joy. Check your foundation.
Check your foundation, check your mindset. Check whether you're giving
from gratitude or guilt, or from abundance or scarcity. Because
when you get it right, when you get it right,
(44:02):
when you say when you serve from a sweet spot,
from your overflow, from the grateful heart that you have,
it becomes one of the most joyful parts of your life.
And when I say this, I say this truth because
that's joy. It's contagious, and it inspires others to serve.
(44:24):
You know what it does again, it creates more ripples.
And that's that beautiful cycle that we've been talking about
all month. That's that beautiful cycle that we've been talking
about all year. And it all starts with gratitude, all right.
So let's make this practical so you know, we talk,
(44:45):
we take this gratitude from feeling to action, all right.
So here's what I want to ask you to do
this week. I want you to write down ten people
or experiences that you're grateful for, not just the obvious one.
I want you to dig deep dig deep down in there,
deep deep down in there. Who taught you something important,
(45:07):
who showed you kindness when you needed it, and who
challenged you in ways that made you crow. What experience
has shaped you, What hardships actually lead to a breakthroughs,
What moments change your perspective. I want you to write
them down, ten of them ten, one to three, seventy nine, ten,
(45:31):
and let yourself really feel their gratitude as you write it.
This isn't just a list. This is for you to
acknowledge your blessings. This is for you to recognize all
of the ways that you've been served, supported in shaped.
Now I got to action for you, not the one
this section. I want you to choose one person to
(45:54):
honor by serving someone else in their name. Look at
your list of ten and I want you to choose
one person who really stands out. And then this week,
I want you to serve someone else in their honor.
If it's your grandmother that taught you to cook a
meal for someone who needs it and say, this is
the honor of my grandmother. If it's a teacher that
(46:14):
believed in you, mentor someone and think of your teacher
while doing it. And if it's a friend that hells
space for you and pain. I want you to hold
space for someone else and let that be your thank
you to your friend. You're not doing this for recognition.
You're doing it as an act of gratitude. You're continuing
(46:39):
their impact. So I want you to create a we're
gonna call thiss a gratitude to action plan for every blessing,
one act of service. This is about creating a sustainable practice.
So every time you notice a blessing, every time you
feel grateful for someone, ask yourself, how can I pass
(47:02):
this forward? How can I pay this forward? I'm grateful
for your health, donate to a health organization or support
someone in a health crisis. I'm grateful for your home.
Volunteer at a shelter or help someone who's housing is insecure.
I'm grateful for your education. Tutor someone, or share your
(47:22):
knowledge freely. For every blessing, one act of service, that's
gratitude and action. Floor Try it this week. Just try
it and notice how it feels. Notice how gratitude and
service take start to be so inseparable. Remember I said
(47:43):
earlier about two sides of one coin. On one side
of the coin, that's what this is. That's what this is,
all right, my beautiful people. Before we close this, seal
this in our spirits, put a hand on a heart,
a deep breath in, and I want you to speak
these words with me. All right. I am deeply grateful
(48:08):
for all that I have received. My gratitude, overflows and
generous actions. Honor those who served me by serving others.
My giving hands are guided by my grateful heart. I
live in abundance, and I share abundantly. Service is my joy,
(48:31):
my purpose, my prayer. As I give, I receive as
I serve. I am filled, I am grateful, I am generous,
and I am making a difference. I want you how
to breathe that in and let this be your truth.
(48:58):
And that said, my beautiful people, That's the end of
our November Giving Back series. And that's the end of
this part of this season. We will be coming back.
We will be coming back. We cover so much this month,
from understanding why service is self love, to finding your
unique way to give, to recognizing community as your mirror,
(49:22):
into connecting gratitude with generosity. I hope this series have
shifted something in you. I hope that it's given you
permission to serve in your own way, from your own overflow,
with your own gifts, and I hope it's reminded you
that you are a part of something bigger, that your
life ripples outward, and that your service matters. And as
(49:46):
we head into the new year with new themes, new conversations,
I want you to carry this with you. Gratitude and
service are not separate practices. There are two expressions of
the same truth. You are blessed and you are a
blessed thing. If this series unpacked you please share it,
(50:10):
send it to someone who needs to hear it, and
leave a review, tag me on social media. And most importantly,
let's take action. Don't just consume the content, let it
transform into surface. Let your grateful heart become giving hands again.
I thank you for being here. I thank you for
being a part of this community. I thank you for
(50:32):
being willing to give back. I can't tell y'all enough
how much I love you all. Not gonna make a difference.
This is the season and self love. I am not
only see y'all next year. I have an amazing, amazing
my day. Thank you so much for joining me today
on this journey of intentional healing. I hope that this
(50:54):
conversation has filled your cup and reminded you of the
beautiful and worthy person that you are. I want you
to remember healing isn't about rushing.
Speaker 2 (51:04):
It's about showing up for yourself with love and intention,
one day at a time. So I'll see you back
here Monday and Wednesday for another episode of the Season
of Healing Intentionally right here on.
Speaker 1 (51:20):
The Season of Self Love podcast. So until then, keep
choosing you and visit us at the Season of Self
Love podcast dot com for show notes and resources, and
remember to connect with me on Instagram at the real
Naomi Banks. This has been brought to you by Asks
Naomi and elevating Me self Discovery because your healing matters.
(51:43):
You are loved, you are worthy, and you are exactly
where you need to be. Take care
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