April 17, 2024 • 40 mins
Wed (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, we found the other recording of John Boy’s in car mic.. - Tater has the latest Tatertainment News.. - Hoyt tries to help Dumus un-buy a V.W. Beetle.. - Terry Hanson takes us on another walk down his sports memory lane - this time he talks about hanging out with Hammerin’ Hank Aaron.. - Lipless has a collection of blonde jokes.. - and Rich Schiedner helps us report on “The Little Man in the Jar”..!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:04):
How they friends. You're listening to the John Boy and
Billy Big Show.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
They got stupid Quin's curnaments for John Boy and Billy Playhouse,
Wayton Delvert, Ribbondom, John Boy, Jeopardy and the Biggest Dadlaine
Spector Vision Buildings. Soun of the Bristol Motor Speedway.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Cock a doodle doode of an Adam ready you know,
like we're married, so you know, I was saying, man,
we got Marshie Rock here we could hear like just
some nice female sounds.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
For nobody touching.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Morning? Oh your breath?
Speaker 4 (01:23):
Oh my god?
Speaker 5 (01:26):
Does he sounded that rust? See morning sugar?
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Always coming up with great ideas for alarm clocks. There's something,
there's something to that. Just had and buried it out yet.
Speaker 6 (01:48):
Which part the sounds like your mom calling you because
you're late for school?
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Or yeah there you know you'd have to be there
and we don't you want that?
Speaker 6 (01:58):
You want the alarm clock nowted like you, I get it?
Play with your hair, honey, get up?
Speaker 1 (02:07):
All right? That worked?
Speaker 7 (02:10):
Thank you?
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Oh there's so many things I wanted to say, just
don't do it. Let's look at the national days right quick.
National Cheeseball Day, don't work cheese Ball, National Banana Day,
Banana teal or man tylor me Banana National Crawfish Day.
There you go, boys down Louisiana. Man need some fresh crawfish.
(02:35):
Work on that later. And uh, there's Haku Poetry Day.
That sells stuff like working on some poetry. Hey, that
was one right there. It was it that sounds like poetry.
That's okay. Well, so we got three days in history
that'll be really important. That's where we're got our categories.
(02:56):
We'll get our first prize. Back out and get that
winning beginning. This has been your wake up call. Big
shows on the radio. Good morning, Big shows on the
radio coming up. We'll play out versus. Get you ready
for your prize pack. Big O'LS Tractor Prize package. It
includes a one year subscription to Malsey Oaks Gamekeepers Magazine,
(03:18):
also LS Tractor Cap. Go to lstractor USA dot com.
Fine your local dealer. Learn why customers start blue and
stay blue. Look at three dates in history where we
get our categories. April of seventeen, there was nineteen ninety
a twenty one year old man plea, the no Contest,
the seven hundred and thirty two charges of disturbing the
(03:38):
peace and driving with a suspended license in Torrance, California.
So rather than face two hundred seventy five years in jail,
all the man agreed to move away from neighbors who
said he drove his folkswagon across their lawns every day
for three hundred and sixty six consecutive days. I remember
(03:58):
this story, I really do.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
And what he was claiming is that his license was suspended,
so he figured if he didn't drive the car on
the road, then he wasn't breaking the rules, so he
went through the neighbor's yard every day.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
Sounds like a great plan to work out idiot's move.
Up to nineteen ninety one, railroad workers go on strike
in the US.
Speaker 6 (04:22):
That's scary.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
And then three a drunken thirty four year old research
scientists in Axbridge, England, stumbled home and fell asleep in
a house where he had lived seven years earlier. Police
were called when a teenager came home to find the
intruder asleep in his bed.
Speaker 8 (04:42):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Police took the scientist to his own home and did
not file charges.
Speaker 6 (04:47):
Wowick, mom, there's some dudeh My.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Nerd got today's pilot sweay to go, don't they? And
there's our categori The Big Show you told free line,
Come on and play Outbursts next. Good morning, it's a
(05:31):
Big Show on the radio for your Wednesday, April seventeen.
Today's feature track from the Big Show Big Box brought
you by Charlotte Motor Speedway Home and a Coke Cola
six hundred. Sunday, May twenty six, The Little Man in
a Jar with red Shiners, Sirgebrige words little Jar Joy
when you hit the Big Box at the Big Show dot.
Speaker 9 (05:52):
Com Upburst, Let's play Outburst.
Speaker 10 (05:59):
It's the game that anyone can win.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
John Boy Billy gave the prizes from the Big Prize.
Speaker 8 (06:07):
Being Let's go.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
He contested number one.
Speaker 8 (06:11):
This should really be a lot.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
Of fun when you're playing uppers.
Speaker 9 (06:17):
Have a hurry up and guest time you love the
best time you have a big shots.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Let's say hey to Brian from Don Lap and I'll
say we have shot.
Speaker 11 (06:34):
You, O'Brien, Ryan, Good morning, Brian. Hey, the room all away, welcome.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
In here, Barnick. Alright, damn, let's get you to these
three categories. Get that prize packed to you up. I'm
ready in five seconds. Three examples of disturbing the peace.
Speaker 7 (07:00):
Ready go uh drunk in public, fighting in public, loud music.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Here you go right now. We need three things found
on a railroad, ready to go crossing on them train,
train track and for the wind. Three places to fall
asleep in any old house.
Speaker 7 (07:25):
Ready go a recliner of the bed and a cow.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
And there you are waiting to go. Well, let's track
the price.
Speaker 10 (07:35):
Back ride.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
A ride, my man, Jackie gonna hook you up. You
gonna hang on.
Speaker 12 (07:42):
You gotta asked by the first time calling me to
get the cow there.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Like when you talk back bottom of the hour topping
you a new another microphone one of my race cars
be size one. You heard yesterday this time unbelievable.
Speaker 9 (08:07):
Yes, I.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
H h, good morning. It's a week showing the radio. Yeah,
(08:44):
yesterday's time you heard. I'm also trying to coach me
around the racetrack. It was it was distracting. That was
my problem. Of course, we being a Hall of Fame
broadcaster and the one time the most influential interviewer in
NASCAR with only will access to Dell ear and Hart,
Rusty Wallace, the.
Speaker 6 (09:04):
Icons asator, so Thresty, it's an icon and allge.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
So of course there were microphones all around me, including
all in the race cars. Sometimes hear this, I'd like
to point out this one is early in my racing career.
Those are short tracks. Happens real quick, and they say
it's good to say out loud. It helps your brain
process what you're what you're going through. And I've heard
that yet, so I'm not. It's not me sounding like
(09:33):
an idiot. No no, no, it's do it so all right,
so go ahead and roll that hopefully final tape.
Speaker 13 (09:39):
Sometimes I think maybe you guys get taught, get tired
of me talking about my racing career. Oh pushall, so
I have to come up with fun ways to share
my experience with you again.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Oh for suall, when.
Speaker 13 (09:56):
I finished third the champions bark Plug National Championship and
shot him on to Speedway, I had a microphone in
the race car. You want to see what it's like
driving with an expert race driver, somebody with razor sharp
skills that becomes one with the machine during the race.
Speaker 10 (10:12):
We've got Paul Newman doing it too.
Speaker 13 (10:14):
No no, no, we'll try to get so that a
little bit later. First let's talk about me. This is
some it's gonna be some fun stuff here. You know,
a lot of a lot of your your race car drivers,
you know, being around Rusting and Ernie and Kyle and
the boys. You know, they talk out loud to themselves
when you're when you're calling you use this is just
something that you do and it helps you race. Paul
Newman showed me that little trick. Really actually I heard him,
(10:36):
you know, talking to me on the tround.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Hi, you pig jerk, get out of the way.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
Maybe that would help. So luckily we had the microphone
in the car. Let's let's experience it with me.
Speaker 10 (10:45):
Wait a minute, where am I hostile classroom? Oh good,
can't wait to hear it.
Speaker 7 (10:49):
Let go.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
All right here there's the microphone inside my my Legends
race car.
Speaker 8 (10:54):
Okay, okay, all right.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Waiting for the green flag to drunk. This is in
National champion ship, waiting for the green flag. Looking for
the green flag. See the green flag. I'm going looking
for the green flap.
Speaker 8 (11:06):
Look at that blonder sircud row.
Speaker 14 (11:09):
The great flag, great flat gas gas gas gas gas
gasket gas gast great great great turn turn turn cast
gas gas gas gas gas gas gas cat boat wave
wave wait, bright break turn turn turk gas gas gas
cats wave wave wave break right bright bright turn dirt
cast gas.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
Gas gas gas cats way way brank right break brank wave.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
Brank gears gas gas gas turn tr trk.
Speaker 14 (11:31):
Gas gas gas cast the way, wait bright break way
the way gas gags games break wait games wait.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
That's a let's get to some of the more exciting
points that was like toward the first part. Right, all right,
let me all right to find a spot right here.
Speaker 13 (11:49):
Okay, little guess, little gas, little guess, A little gut
slow slow.
Speaker 15 (11:55):
Slow flow slow slow so slow slow.
Speaker 14 (11:58):
Guess guys, guys, guts fast fast gas guess guess fast cast,
fast cast cat guys fast cast cast guess guess break break, breight,
brick turn dirt, dirt dirty.
Speaker 3 (12:05):
Gas cast guess guess guess I got a flat?
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Get a flag? You get a flag? What's that?
Speaker 6 (12:08):
What's it?
Speaker 16 (12:09):
What's it?
Speaker 6 (12:09):
Oh?
Speaker 14 (12:09):
Break break break break break break, no, apologize, apologize and
apologize and apologize gas guys guys cast bright back break
but wait, wait what guess?
Speaker 4 (12:16):
Guess?
Speaker 3 (12:16):
Guests? Oh, boogie, bookie, bookie, pick pick pick noe.
Speaker 14 (12:19):
Pick pick pick guys gust, cat break tick no no steering,
will star on little MISSI messy, messy messen break break
break break gas guest.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
Guest listen, Yeah, honey, let's just find another exciting part.
Speaker 8 (12:28):
There was just a lot of chef goes on the
side that car.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
Do you know that?
Speaker 14 (12:33):
What guess guess guess guess guess guess break break guys up,
saund I got somebody side, I'm wrong, going outside and
outside outside outside, okay, gas gas gas cast guests break rack,
hold on, big jerk sitting up Johns punching up dirt.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Dirt O mis meek gas cast gas cast casting.
Speaker 8 (12:48):
All right, that's what makes just fight, right boy.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
I know there's an exciting part in here, just a segment.
Find guys, guess guess guess caution flag?
Speaker 3 (12:55):
What adiot's got up? Conscient me break break back?
Speaker 1 (12:59):
You don't brackybody?
Speaker 6 (13:04):
All right?
Speaker 1 (13:04):
That was just like a little caution flag.
Speaker 13 (13:06):
Actual, Wait a minute, I know it's something exciting in
here in here now, okay, chard into.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
The rights, right right, break.
Speaker 14 (13:15):
Down gas gas gas gust checker fly, checker fly.
Speaker 16 (13:18):
I finished.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
There plies, dirt plies.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
Dirt plies.
Speaker 11 (13:27):
Blood.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
You have a good run. Out there all right, Yeah,
with some some good stuff in there somewhere. I'll just
have to go through the tape again and see if
I can get it for you.
Speaker 3 (13:40):
Okay, Like it.
Speaker 17 (13:41):
Says on the Bobby Hurley commercial, Heroes are made in
the zone.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
Good morning, this wig Shaw on the radio and we're
about twenty minutes away from Taylor Tamon news Hey for
that right now, let's axe Heike. Ain't good?
Speaker 5 (14:27):
Look at mama, y'all tailor, come pick us up, yo,
what's up? Welcome to axe Heike. The place to golf
on the far one one you need for all your
rhino classification to reflection the trim. You heard me, didy
dig this, dear ike. After a whole year of wedded blessed,
(14:51):
things have started to go south between my bride and I.
Speaker 3 (14:54):
The main problem is there's hardly know more whooping.
Speaker 5 (14:58):
She thinks plastic surg You're able to make things better
with our relationship.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
She had some work done before with.
Speaker 5 (15:04):
Her last husband, but that's an awful lot of money
for a working stuff like me.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
What's your take on the situation?
Speaker 5 (15:10):
The Groom of Frankenstein, I Swear and your people, Transylvania,
North Cakilaki dead groom. Uh look, Bama, if you've been
with your old hole for a whole year, you might
as well do what you can to stick with it.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
I mean, I ain't been married.
Speaker 5 (15:30):
A whole yet in totality, in all of my fourteen
metromordial excursion, it sounds like your relationship ain't the onliest
thing headed south the way you talk her big old button,
them both relations blouse bunnies is heading the same scenario direction.
But be frau ward, my brother, just because she got
(15:50):
them lips all a punk full of bro tox that
ain't gonna change the b auction coming out from between them.
Let me preach on it. And it's a good thing
you come to, Ike, because you obliviously got no idea
about what going on inside the the female line. Man
(16:10):
see you both on the same uh uh, what you
call infrequency. She sees your little love boat headed straight
for the rocks, and before she abandonates the ship of
your wedded blister, she gonna try to get you old
l Capitatin Steuben to upfit her little whole boat with
some brand new spagutating d cup life preservers. Now you saying, Ike,
(16:35):
ain't no way, my old lady. Whatever do me like that?
Speaker 3 (16:37):
We in love?
Speaker 6 (16:39):
M h?
Speaker 5 (16:40):
Well, letting I remind you that she was in love
with her last husband too, and who's been swinging on
that playground he built a That's right, you sucker, So
think about it. She's gonna show her great flications by
taking the house, the car, the boobis, and the booty
and leave you standing there holding your vienias and blow
tortures saying what happens? The beating factor to your investment
(17:05):
is going to be the next jackass you come along.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
So how does you prevent this from happening? Well, the
bad news is.
Speaker 5 (17:12):
You can't, my brother, but you can keep throwing all
that money down her dream.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
See now now, now, now, smartsman's.
Speaker 5 (17:21):
Get what you call a prenupticial agreement to protect all
the worldly goods. Well, why not come up with something
to protect your big ticket what you call in fleshment.
If you getting a vibe that miss Nipping Tuck might
be fixing up, are you in n oft?
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (17:39):
Get her to sign what I likes to call a
pre niptial agreement, see, my brother, that gives you solely
ownership of all her afro mentioned a new opposter you did,
even if she's using it.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
I mean, ain't no sense in giving her everything. That's way.
Speaker 5 (17:59):
If she kicks you out first, she got to give
back the rack, unzip the lip, and reissue that big
rear end.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
So if she steps out of line and you gotta.
Speaker 5 (18:09):
Get your hands dirty and get things out of control,
you ain't kicking herd of the curb. You just rest
in the toe of yo shoe in that big round
rent to own re end.
Speaker 3 (18:20):
This is I peace out.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
If you want to exac mal the exac John Boy
Belle po box one nine one one one. Charlotte didn't
say two eight two one nine email anybody but me
at the Big Show dot com.
Speaker 3 (18:35):
Well, well, Betty Hill, where the key to bo.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Bro hand and you'll appreciate it.
Speaker 16 (18:49):
This is brother Jimmers Swagert all the way from button Urs, Louisiana,
begging you please don't let your children listen to this
so cold big show with uh Jay and Billy or
whatever their name is. Don't listen to it. Listen to something.
Speaker 8 (19:38):
Good morning.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
There's a big show on the radio. The lower just
a little lower our ways sports braves with my man
Terry Hanson was like man, Hank Aaron. It was just
honored when they hit seven hundred and fifteen home run.
It was the last week big deal of braves and stuff,
and I mean Hanson was there. Hang it, Hammer and Hank,
(20:02):
you go tell us the store man gotta hit that
on the anniversary we had. So that's what's going to happen. Also,
Tator Taman News just minutes away. Oh yeah, Big Show
rolls home. Good morning, Big shows on the radio. Coming up.
We played John Boyd Jeopardy Winner gets one hundred and
twenty dollars worth of bull Snot cleaning products made in
(20:24):
the USA. You know, drug drivers keep America moving, and
Bullsnot make sure they look good doing it. Find bull
Snot at truck stops across America or download the bull
Snot app. Click on the link at the Big Show
dot com. Hang all play in minutes. Right now, it's
time for tat Taman News. And here's that girl, Marcia
h tator More.
Speaker 6 (20:45):
Hey, you guys remember the nineties and you remember the
song You remember us talking about John Wayne bobbitts. Oh yeah,
I wrote a song about it right well, for those
kids that aren't sure or don't really remember it's a
husband wife as she said that he was treating her badly.
She used again sue knife, removed some of his man parts. Peace,
(21:09):
throw off, toss the toss it out the window. They
found it. They successfully sowed it back on. So he
was an amputee but was repaired. Well, he's an amputee again.
John Wayne Bobbitt has suffered another amputation, this time professionally done.
He lost his toes.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
Oh oh, he's.
Speaker 6 (21:28):
In the late stages of neurological issues, which he also
blames for his nineteen ninety three tabloid scandal. So really
don't understand how that is.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
But what that might affect other parts of your body
if I guess, yeah, it's vascular.
Speaker 9 (21:46):
Where you're going.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
She also blands.
Speaker 6 (21:50):
Well, that's according to the sun. So those are exciting
them all right?
Speaker 1 (21:54):
Moving on?
Speaker 6 (21:55):
Uh. Hannah Guteras read the Armor on the set of Rust,
was sentenced in her criminal case. She's going to prison
for a little while. The jury found her guilty over
the fatal shooting of Helena Hutchins. She was convicted of
manslaughter for her role in the death and received a
sentence of eighteen months. She will go to a woman's
(22:18):
correctional facility in the state of New Mexico.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
According to TMZ, does that mean Alec Baldwin is like
off the hook?
Speaker 18 (22:24):
No, No, he has a separate, completely different judge and jury.
Speaker 6 (22:29):
And a different charge. All right, colt Ford, we were
just talking about him. He suffered a heart attack, Oh
oh wow this past week and he according to tmzs
he's out of the woods, but he won't be well
enough to hit the stage anytime soon. So he is recovering,
but they have canceled the rest of his touring dates
(22:50):
this year.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
So I'm still in the hospital and yeah, when he
feels better.
Speaker 6 (22:55):
He's still in the hospital dealing with that. Morgan Wallen
was also in the news for chucking the chair over
the off the roof and went six stories and his
ex fiance it took to the tabloids and social media
to say, hey.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Have an ex fiance. Well you know, the.
Speaker 6 (23:14):
Taboys are reporting that he was upset because he found
out that she got married and that was an outburst
and she was like and so she went to social
media and said, yeah, keep my name out of it.
Speaker 10 (23:25):
All right, we broke up.
Speaker 6 (23:27):
We do have a child, I'm with this.
Speaker 1 (23:29):
Other guy had.
Speaker 3 (23:30):
Nothing to do with this. Keep my name out.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
She goes on social media to say, keep my name.
Speaker 6 (23:37):
Well, you have to fight back. I guess when it's
it's it's you know, reported on the John Boy Billy Show.
So by that point she's like, well, it made it there.
Speaker 10 (23:46):
I mean, just clear that up, right?
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Am I right?
Speaker 6 (23:51):
And a lot of people have been asking will President
Joe Biden and former President Donald Trump do a debate?
And so found out through CBS News that twelve news
organizations are pleading for them to do a debate.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Yes please, I say they do it with knives. Trump's
ever got size anywhere any place?
Speaker 6 (24:10):
Apparently one of his last stops he set it up.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
He set up a second podium.
Speaker 6 (24:18):
On stage with him with the sign saying anytime, anywhere,
bring it, Bring it.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Well, Biden has said he's willing.
Speaker 6 (24:25):
To debate Trump. So stay tuned, check your schedules, checked,
all your check all your news outlets because it might
be coming y'all.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
Will you see it?
Speaker 9 (24:38):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (24:39):
Baby, Well, thank you very much. Well, let's get us
a winner. Let's play John Boy Jeopardy review. Yesterday's question
we said, oh sure, they can fly but this is
something you have on your face that birds don't. It's
not a pecker's except for ostriches. They've got them too.
Oh boy, I meant to use that pecker line yesterday,
(24:59):
and I didn't just throw it. Go ahead and make
your own joke. Not yeah, you're right, should have set
it up. But anyway, let's say, go on with today's
John Boy Jeopardy. Okay, when talking with someone in Germany,
it is considered extremely impolite to do this with one
(25:21):
hand in your pocket. Scratch, impolite to do this, what
end in your pocket? I guess No. One eight hundred
Big Show you told free line. We played John Boy Jeopardy. Next,
(26:03):
Good morning, It's a big show on the radio. Will
Home into your Homeday, Wednesday, April seventeen. Today's feature track
from the Big Show Big Box brought you by show
Him on the Swedeway to Home in the Coca Cola
six hundred Sunday, May twenty six, The little Man in
the Jar with Rich Sinner Day, were just talking about
(26:24):
little vomit to whack whack here it is man's yard.
Some more of things of that nature. Searzburg key words
A little jar when you hit the big bit box
head right now, let's play yeahs live across America.
Speaker 18 (26:45):
It's John Boy Jepande Yeah and now a man whose
great uncle was responsible for bringing down twenty eight planes
during the war with Germany and still holds the record
as worst airplane mechanic ever.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
Boy, Let's say hey to Jerry at an Alma, Georgia.
Good morning, Jerry, Hey buddy, All right, Jerry, you got
the first shot at it this morning when talking with
When talking with someone in Germany, it's considered extremely impolite
(27:24):
to do this with one hand in your pocket.
Speaker 12 (27:30):
I'm bout say, what is shaking hand? John Boy?
Speaker 1 (27:32):
What is shaking hands? John Boy? And you are right, Jerry.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
They prefer you one at a time.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
Good work, Jerry. One dollars worth of bulls, not cleaning products.
Head down all before you Halla.
Speaker 12 (27:53):
Can I get a shout out? Yes, sir, we'll get
a shout out to my beautiful wife. For seven years
it was shout out all my customers about a cabin
sadors from lots of custom cabin Sinama, Georgia. And uh,
all my fellow Christians who are trying to live a
good life in this evil world.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
I hear you that al much. Damn I mean, Jared
down now, I'm I'm making no dick and we'll get
your dress. And Jared, I got you. Boddy, thank you
seven years. It's working on seven years. No wonder you're
still hallowluing it. Hey, I'm surprised he kept up with
this long awesome Boddy. Glad to have you listened. Glad
(28:32):
you won that boy you hang on.
Speaker 7 (28:34):
With Jaggie, Thank you, bottom of the hour.
Speaker 1 (28:44):
Top of your news. Oh Tom capsule good, Oh rest
my voice.
Speaker 16 (29:00):
M hm.
Speaker 13 (29:21):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 19 (29:36):
I've started answering my telephone. Oh man, Like that was
like a service, like one of the many services that
you called the problem.
Speaker 6 (29:44):
Like.
Speaker 13 (29:45):
For example, I'll call like on a Sunday afternoon when
ready knows I'm at the beach to check on my flight.
Speaker 19 (29:50):
I'll answer the phone by going, thank you for calling.
Too lazy to do it yourself. Travel services, I'm sorry,
but all of our all of our representative is busy.
You may choose from the following responses to tell the
representative you stupid. Press one.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
To choose you're killing men, press too to choose I
told you.
Speaker 19 (30:22):
This would happened to press three, and then, depending upon
what day it is, I'll answer with, thank you for
calling too lazy to install your own digital cable service.
I'm sorry, but all of our representative is busy at
your house.
Speaker 10 (30:44):
Look, I'm right over there by the coffee table.
Speaker 19 (30:48):
Thank you for calling too lazy to put your home
security too lazy to call the home security monitoring service yourself.
Speaker 3 (30:58):
He called me one afternoon.
Speaker 19 (30:59):
I swear he called me to tell me that the
sticker on his window was bothering him.
Speaker 10 (31:06):
If our sticker is bothering you, press one.
Speaker 3 (31:15):
It's right there on the window, right where I look.
Speaker 10 (31:17):
Out, or where a burglar would look in. Y.
Speaker 19 (31:22):
Have you considered taking, say, your fingernail and pulling it off?
Speaker 3 (31:25):
Guice way over there, cod fix it.
Speaker 19 (31:33):
If this is ed low calling, press the pound sign
to add you dumb you Christopher Reeve, Yes, bubble boy.
Speaker 3 (31:47):
What it's so funny is because he knows why I'm
calling me.
Speaker 19 (31:52):
What's even funnier is he'll actually press a button for
one of the choices, and I know which choice it is.
Speaker 1 (32:01):
Okay, all right, what we're doing?
Speaker 10 (32:03):
If you're calling from a rotary phone. What in the
world are you doing at rafers?
Speaker 19 (32:06):
Okay, right, you're too lazy to press any buttons.
Speaker 1 (32:12):
Please hold I'm okay, all right, come on, just get
back to work. We're at work. The latest thing, this
is it.
Speaker 19 (32:23):
The latest thing is he's got discount coupons for a
snack that he really likes that he's too lazy to
go to the grocery store to redeem.
Speaker 10 (32:31):
And he's panicking because they have an expiration date that's
coming up at the end of the month.
Speaker 3 (32:37):
And for three days I've heard nothing. But man, I'm
just I can't do nothing. I'm too stupid to even
go to the grocery store and.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Use these coupons.
Speaker 19 (32:46):
And he'll look at me with those eyebrows raised, waiting
on me to go.
Speaker 1 (32:49):
I'll do it, yes, Billy, I actually have to go
to the grocery store.
Speaker 17 (32:54):
For the COUPONEA if this was eighteen fifty, nobody you'd
be out there whitewashing a nobody.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
Why do I fence like you? Ready?
Speaker 9 (33:05):
Me and Becky Thatcher lost in the caves, nerve racking engine,
Joe run around the lander.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
I tell you this was gonna happen.
Speaker 10 (33:17):
Glad Mark Twain never met you.
Speaker 3 (33:20):
I knew somebody was going.
Speaker 12 (33:21):
I knew it.
Speaker 19 (33:23):
Yeah, you've heard it too, Jackie. I'm surprised that you've
dodged the bullet allready.
Speaker 3 (33:27):
You know what almost volunteer, But you guys walked out
of the room. Yeah, we've heard it too many times.
Speaker 12 (33:32):
I knew somebody he does that.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
Deprecating.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
Yeah, I'm sustudent.
Speaker 6 (33:41):
Run.
Speaker 19 (33:42):
Yes, if I could just get into the grocery store.
Speaker 3 (33:45):
Persons cupin for a week.
Speaker 10 (33:48):
And then I heard Billy say it's about to run out.
Speaker 3 (33:50):
I knew all it.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
Somebody wash man. I got stuff to.
Speaker 3 (33:56):
Do between know, and then I just want to know.
Did you volunteer?
Speaker 10 (34:00):
Where you volunteer?
Speaker 9 (34:01):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (34:01):
I finally said, just get me. I take it from it.
Speaker 19 (34:07):
I look at him and go, do you know how much.
Speaker 4 (34:09):
Money you make?
Speaker 1 (34:11):
Do you have any idea?
Speaker 19 (34:14):
I'm gonna go save like you know, two dollars on
the bond, bonds and crispy wafers.
Speaker 10 (34:21):
Saving money's making money?
Speaker 1 (34:25):
Never mind that?
Speaker 3 (34:25):
Do you know what you pay me? Make?
Speaker 9 (34:29):
And live on?
Speaker 3 (34:29):
What fosse of the.
Speaker 10 (34:30):
Cracks are here?
Speaker 1 (34:32):
A man does live exactly.
Speaker 15 (34:39):
I don't like that voice you used from me in
using it, John Boy and Dilly and I must have
spent six hours last April on that ten forty form.
Speaker 8 (34:54):
Easy my ass, Good morning radio, dumb right, good.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
Morning, this week show on the radio. About twenty minutes
to get up with Hanson. It's him some sports briefs.
You know, last week's anniversary Henry Aaron hitting seven hundred
and fifteen. Hanson was part of the Turner Sports during
that and said, you men, tell you about that? Said
you think? I said, that's what God has him about
(35:45):
hammering Hank. He was there do that in twenty minutes
right now, all right, this call waiting on Good morning
big show man. Hello, oy, this hoint all my life.
Speaker 9 (35:56):
I want to fight about it all right now.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
John Mornbella here there.
Speaker 9 (36:00):
You beggar.
Speaker 3 (36:00):
I'll hurry.
Speaker 9 (36:01):
No driving, nose picking, knuckles dragging. Self actualizing, perverse.
Speaker 1 (36:07):
Self actualizing that means fully living up to one's potential.
Speaker 9 (36:12):
Oh, the new reader's digest come yesterday. I was just
sitting here on the commode increasing my word part.
Speaker 1 (36:18):
Things with a visual So watching you over a temptation trailer.
Speaker 9 (36:22):
Well, old Deveris Nephew Dumas has been flopping here for
about a week.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
Now, Think I ever heard you talk about dumas before.
Speaker 9 (36:28):
Oh, he's the baby of the family, so of course
he knows. Ever dead gum fan got tired of fighting
with his mom and daddy, so he packed his clothes,
bought him a bus ticket, let out on the road
to Mature.
Speaker 1 (36:40):
Well how's it going so far? Na too?
Speaker 9 (36:43):
Yesterday morning, he says, got a little money saved up,
He's going out to buy him a car. Come sputtering
into the body shop about lunch time, driving this nasty
old sixty five Volkswagen bug, worst hunk of junk you
ever seen in your life. He says, you like it?
This my new car? I said, well, how about moving it?
It's leaking oil all over the parking lot. W'd you
get that thing anyway? Them says from his failer, Rufus
(37:07):
McGhee only give him one hundred dollars for it. I said,
well you still got jip. See Rufus McGee. He's one
of him. Shady tree Fellers sells cars out of his
front yard, the type. Remember Annie Griffith Show where Barney
bought that junkie car from old missus leash.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
Of course, I do.
Speaker 9 (37:23):
Yeah, Well, Rufus sells the one missus lesh turns down. Anyways,
I said, boy, take that piece of crab back over
here and make him give you your money back. He says, well,
wait a minute. I know it don't look like mush,
but I got it said cheap. I got some money
left over. Figured you and Debort could fix it up
for me. I says, son, that car ain't worth doing
nothing too, and I take it back. I was giving
(37:44):
him somebo what you call tough love, I says Debort.
You follow him over in the truck and give him
a ride back over here. So the two of them
drove off, and I picked up the phone. Called old Rufus,
I says, mister McGee. This, here's John d Rayford with
the Walt Disney coming. We're fixing to do us a
remake of herb Be the love Bug, and we're looking
for a Volkswagen Bug nineteen sixty five model, don't matter
(38:09):
what shape it's in, we're gonna fix it up. I'll
give you three hundred dollars for it, ol'd Rufe says man.
I wish you'd call me a half hour ago. I
had just the one you looking for I just sold it.
I says, well, let me give you my phone number.
If you run up on the more, I'm give me
a call. I figured when Duma showed up, Old Ruf
is about old car back fashion. You can pull a
(38:29):
greasy string out of cats, but that's good thinking.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
Did you get that one out of readers digest too?
Speaker 9 (38:34):
No, that one's original.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
Congratulations. So what happened?
Speaker 9 (38:37):
Well, about a half hour later they come back to
the body shop, both of them just smiling to beat
the band. I says, well, how to go, and Dom says,
pre dang good. I just went in there and told
old mister rufus McGee. I wasn't satisfied, he says, wheel
in allbright back from you. I said, see, I told
you all you gotta do? Is your a little backbone folks? Respect?
Yet just Endeavored says, well, wait, here's the part where
(39:00):
it gets good. I walked up and says, you think
you can sell it? Huh? And Ruf says yeah, I
got a fella wants to buy that very car. Devor says, well,
hold on there minute, we ain't finished the deal here yet.
How much is this fellow gonna give you? He says,
on three hundred dollars, and I says, one, maybe we
are to get a little piece of that money too,
(39:22):
you know. Rufe says, well, I tell you what I
give you back you one hundred dollars, you give me
the car, and when I sell it, we'll split the
other two hundred right down the middle. I says, you
got a deal, so back. Then I turns the Doomis
and says, so you got your money, And Devor says, hey,
we done even better than that. I give old Rufus
back one hundred dollars. He give me the feller's.
Speaker 7 (39:42):
Phone numbers.
Speaker 1 (39:47):
Strikes again.
Speaker 9 (39:49):
If done was gasoline, you wouldn't want to.
Speaker 1 (39:51):
Smoke around it.
Speaker 9 (39:52):
Hey, listen, I gotta run here.
Speaker 6 (39:53):
Me in the.
Speaker 9 (39:54):
CarMax twins suspecting good work. You gonna see Goober later on? Yeah,
well you tell him, I said, yeah, huh, he'll know
what you mean. Y'all came straight apart.
Speaker 19 (40:10):
Hey, baby, this is Sammy Davidson Junior, better known as
Tommy Davidson Jr.
Speaker 8 (40:14):
And I'm thrilled that you're listening to the Big Show
with John Boy and Billy.
Speaker 1 (40:19):
You can take a rainbow man bringing it with you.
Speaker 6 (40:30):
M H.
How they friends. You're listening to the John Boy and
Billy Big Show.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
They got stupid Quin's curnaments for John Boy and Billy Playhouse,
Wayton Delvert, Ribbondom, John Boy, Jeopardy and the Biggest Dadlaine
Spector Vision Buildings. Soun of the Bristol Motor Speedway.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Cock a doodle doode of an Adam ready you know,
like we're married, so you know, I was saying, man,
we got Marshie Rock here we could hear like just
some nice female sounds.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
For nobody touching.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Morning? Oh your breath?
Speaker 4 (01:23):
Oh my god?
Speaker 5 (01:26):
Does he sounded that rust? See morning sugar?
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Always coming up with great ideas for alarm clocks. There's something,
there's something to that. Just had and buried it out yet.
Speaker 6 (01:48):
Which part the sounds like your mom calling you because
you're late for school?
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Or yeah there you know you'd have to be there
and we don't you want that?
Speaker 6 (01:58):
You want the alarm clock nowted like you, I get it?
Play with your hair, honey, get up?
Speaker 1 (02:07):
All right? That worked?
Speaker 7 (02:10):
Thank you?
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Oh there's so many things I wanted to say, just
don't do it. Let's look at the national days right quick.
National Cheeseball Day, don't work cheese Ball, National Banana Day,
Banana teal or man tylor me Banana National Crawfish Day.
There you go, boys down Louisiana. Man need some fresh crawfish.
(02:35):
Work on that later. And uh, there's Haku Poetry Day.
That sells stuff like working on some poetry. Hey, that
was one right there. It was it that sounds like poetry.
That's okay. Well, so we got three days in history
that'll be really important. That's where we're got our categories.
(02:56):
We'll get our first prize. Back out and get that
winning beginning. This has been your wake up call. Big
shows on the radio. Good morning, Big shows on the
radio coming up. We'll play out versus. Get you ready
for your prize pack. Big O'LS Tractor Prize package. It
includes a one year subscription to Malsey Oaks Gamekeepers Magazine,
(03:18):
also LS Tractor Cap. Go to lstractor USA dot com.
Fine your local dealer. Learn why customers start blue and
stay blue. Look at three dates in history where we
get our categories. April of seventeen, there was nineteen ninety
a twenty one year old man plea, the no Contest,
the seven hundred and thirty two charges of disturbing the
(03:38):
peace and driving with a suspended license in Torrance, California.
So rather than face two hundred seventy five years in jail,
all the man agreed to move away from neighbors who
said he drove his folkswagon across their lawns every day
for three hundred and sixty six consecutive days. I remember
(03:58):
this story, I really do.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
And what he was claiming is that his license was suspended,
so he figured if he didn't drive the car on
the road, then he wasn't breaking the rules, so he
went through the neighbor's yard every day.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
Sounds like a great plan to work out idiot's move.
Up to nineteen ninety one, railroad workers go on strike
in the US.
Speaker 6 (04:22):
That's scary.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
And then three a drunken thirty four year old research
scientists in Axbridge, England, stumbled home and fell asleep in
a house where he had lived seven years earlier. Police
were called when a teenager came home to find the
intruder asleep in his bed.
Speaker 8 (04:42):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Police took the scientist to his own home and did
not file charges.
Speaker 6 (04:47):
Wowick, mom, there's some dudeh My.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Nerd got today's pilot sweay to go, don't they? And
there's our categori The Big Show you told free line,
Come on and play Outbursts next. Good morning, it's a
(05:31):
Big Show on the radio for your Wednesday, April seventeen.
Today's feature track from the Big Show Big Box brought
you by Charlotte Motor Speedway Home and a Coke Cola
six hundred. Sunday, May twenty six, The Little Man in
a Jar with red Shiners, Sirgebrige words little Jar Joy
when you hit the Big Box at the Big Show dot.
Speaker 9 (05:52):
Com Upburst, Let's play Outburst.
Speaker 10 (05:59):
It's the game that anyone can win.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
John Boy Billy gave the prizes from the Big Prize.
Speaker 8 (06:07):
Being Let's go.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
He contested number one.
Speaker 8 (06:11):
This should really be a lot.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
Of fun when you're playing uppers.
Speaker 9 (06:17):
Have a hurry up and guest time you love the
best time you have a big shots.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Let's say hey to Brian from Don Lap and I'll
say we have shot.
Speaker 11 (06:34):
You, O'Brien, Ryan, Good morning, Brian. Hey, the room all away, welcome.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
In here, Barnick. Alright, damn, let's get you to these
three categories. Get that prize packed to you up. I'm
ready in five seconds. Three examples of disturbing the peace.
Speaker 7 (07:00):
Ready go uh drunk in public, fighting in public, loud music.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Here you go right now. We need three things found
on a railroad, ready to go crossing on them train,
train track and for the wind. Three places to fall
asleep in any old house.
Speaker 7 (07:25):
Ready go a recliner of the bed and a cow.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
And there you are waiting to go. Well, let's track
the price.
Speaker 10 (07:35):
Back ride.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
A ride, my man, Jackie gonna hook you up. You
gonna hang on.
Speaker 12 (07:42):
You gotta asked by the first time calling me to
get the cow there.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Like when you talk back bottom of the hour topping
you a new another microphone one of my race cars
be size one. You heard yesterday this time unbelievable.
Speaker 9 (08:07):
Yes, I.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
H h, good morning. It's a week showing the radio. Yeah,
(08:44):
yesterday's time you heard. I'm also trying to coach me
around the racetrack. It was it was distracting. That was
my problem. Of course, we being a Hall of Fame
broadcaster and the one time the most influential interviewer in
NASCAR with only will access to Dell ear and Hart,
Rusty Wallace, the.
Speaker 6 (09:04):
Icons asator, so Thresty, it's an icon and allge.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
So of course there were microphones all around me, including
all in the race cars. Sometimes hear this, I'd like
to point out this one is early in my racing career.
Those are short tracks. Happens real quick, and they say
it's good to say out loud. It helps your brain
process what you're what you're going through. And I've heard
that yet, so I'm not. It's not me sounding like
(09:33):
an idiot. No no, no, it's do it so all right,
so go ahead and roll that hopefully final tape.
Speaker 13 (09:39):
Sometimes I think maybe you guys get taught, get tired
of me talking about my racing career. Oh pushall, so
I have to come up with fun ways to share
my experience with you again.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Oh for suall, when.
Speaker 13 (09:56):
I finished third the champions bark Plug National Championship and
shot him on to Speedway, I had a microphone in
the race car. You want to see what it's like
driving with an expert race driver, somebody with razor sharp
skills that becomes one with the machine during the race.
Speaker 10 (10:12):
We've got Paul Newman doing it too.
Speaker 13 (10:14):
No no, no, we'll try to get so that a
little bit later. First let's talk about me. This is
some it's gonna be some fun stuff here. You know,
a lot of a lot of your your race car drivers,
you know, being around Rusting and Ernie and Kyle and
the boys. You know, they talk out loud to themselves
when you're when you're calling you use this is just
something that you do and it helps you race. Paul
Newman showed me that little trick. Really actually I heard him,
(10:36):
you know, talking to me on the tround.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Hi, you pig jerk, get out of the way.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
Maybe that would help. So luckily we had the microphone
in the car. Let's let's experience it with me.
Speaker 10 (10:45):
Wait a minute, where am I hostile classroom? Oh good,
can't wait to hear it.
Speaker 7 (10:49):
Let go.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
All right here there's the microphone inside my my Legends
race car.
Speaker 8 (10:54):
Okay, okay, all right.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Waiting for the green flag to drunk. This is in
National champion ship, waiting for the green flag. Looking for
the green flag. See the green flag. I'm going looking
for the green flap.
Speaker 8 (11:06):
Look at that blonder sircud row.
Speaker 14 (11:09):
The great flag, great flat gas gas gas gas gas
gasket gas gast great great great turn turn turn cast
gas gas gas gas gas gas gas cat boat wave
wave wait, bright break turn turn turk gas gas gas
cats wave wave wave break right bright bright turn dirt
cast gas.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
Gas gas gas cats way way brank right break brank wave.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
Brank gears gas gas gas turn tr trk.
Speaker 14 (11:31):
Gas gas gas cast the way, wait bright break way
the way gas gags games break wait games wait.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
That's a let's get to some of the more exciting
points that was like toward the first part. Right, all right,
let me all right to find a spot right here.
Speaker 13 (11:49):
Okay, little guess, little gas, little guess, A little gut
slow slow.
Speaker 15 (11:55):
Slow flow slow slow so slow slow.
Speaker 14 (11:58):
Guess guys, guys, guts fast fast gas guess guess fast cast,
fast cast cat guys fast cast cast guess guess break break, breight,
brick turn dirt, dirt dirty.
Speaker 3 (12:05):
Gas cast guess guess guess I got a flat?
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Get a flag? You get a flag? What's that?
Speaker 6 (12:08):
What's it?
Speaker 16 (12:09):
What's it?
Speaker 6 (12:09):
Oh?
Speaker 14 (12:09):
Break break break break break break, no, apologize, apologize and
apologize and apologize gas guys guys cast bright back break
but wait, wait what guess?
Speaker 4 (12:16):
Guess?
Speaker 3 (12:16):
Guests? Oh, boogie, bookie, bookie, pick pick pick noe.
Speaker 14 (12:19):
Pick pick pick guys gust, cat break tick no no steering,
will star on little MISSI messy, messy messen break break
break break gas guest.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
Guest listen, Yeah, honey, let's just find another exciting part.
Speaker 8 (12:28):
There was just a lot of chef goes on the
side that car.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
Do you know that?
Speaker 14 (12:33):
What guess guess guess guess guess guess break break guys up,
saund I got somebody side, I'm wrong, going outside and
outside outside outside, okay, gas gas gas cast guests break rack,
hold on, big jerk sitting up Johns punching up dirt.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Dirt O mis meek gas cast gas cast casting.
Speaker 8 (12:48):
All right, that's what makes just fight, right boy.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
I know there's an exciting part in here, just a segment.
Find guys, guess guess guess caution flag?
Speaker 3 (12:55):
What adiot's got up? Conscient me break break back?
Speaker 1 (12:59):
You don't brackybody?
Speaker 6 (13:04):
All right?
Speaker 1 (13:04):
That was just like a little caution flag.
Speaker 13 (13:06):
Actual, Wait a minute, I know it's something exciting in
here in here now, okay, chard into.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
The rights, right right, break.
Speaker 14 (13:15):
Down gas gas gas gust checker fly, checker fly.
Speaker 16 (13:18):
I finished.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
There plies, dirt plies.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
Dirt plies.
Speaker 11 (13:27):
Blood.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
You have a good run. Out there all right, Yeah,
with some some good stuff in there somewhere. I'll just
have to go through the tape again and see if
I can get it for you.
Speaker 3 (13:40):
Okay, Like it.
Speaker 17 (13:41):
Says on the Bobby Hurley commercial, Heroes are made in
the zone.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
Good morning, this wig Shaw on the radio and we're
about twenty minutes away from Taylor Tamon news Hey for
that right now, let's axe Heike. Ain't good?
Speaker 5 (14:27):
Look at mama, y'all tailor, come pick us up, yo,
what's up? Welcome to axe Heike. The place to golf
on the far one one you need for all your
rhino classification to reflection the trim. You heard me, didy
dig this, dear ike. After a whole year of wedded blessed,
(14:51):
things have started to go south between my bride and I.
Speaker 3 (14:54):
The main problem is there's hardly know more whooping.
Speaker 5 (14:58):
She thinks plastic surg You're able to make things better
with our relationship.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
She had some work done before with.
Speaker 5 (15:04):
Her last husband, but that's an awful lot of money
for a working stuff like me.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
What's your take on the situation?
Speaker 5 (15:10):
The Groom of Frankenstein, I Swear and your people, Transylvania,
North Cakilaki dead groom. Uh look, Bama, if you've been
with your old hole for a whole year, you might
as well do what you can to stick with it.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
I mean, I ain't been married.
Speaker 5 (15:30):
A whole yet in totality, in all of my fourteen
metromordial excursion, it sounds like your relationship ain't the onliest
thing headed south the way you talk her big old button,
them both relations blouse bunnies is heading the same scenario direction.
But be frau ward, my brother, just because she got
(15:50):
them lips all a punk full of bro tox that
ain't gonna change the b auction coming out from between them.
Let me preach on it. And it's a good thing
you come to, Ike, because you obliviously got no idea
about what going on inside the the female line. Man
(16:10):
see you both on the same uh uh, what you
call infrequency. She sees your little love boat headed straight
for the rocks, and before she abandonates the ship of
your wedded blister, she gonna try to get you old
l Capitatin Steuben to upfit her little whole boat with
some brand new spagutating d cup life preservers. Now you saying, Ike,
(16:35):
ain't no way, my old lady. Whatever do me like that?
Speaker 3 (16:37):
We in love?
Speaker 6 (16:39):
M h?
Speaker 5 (16:40):
Well, letting I remind you that she was in love
with her last husband too, and who's been swinging on
that playground he built a That's right, you sucker, So
think about it. She's gonna show her great flications by
taking the house, the car, the boobis, and the booty
and leave you standing there holding your vienias and blow
tortures saying what happens? The beating factor to your investment
(17:05):
is going to be the next jackass you come along.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
So how does you prevent this from happening? Well, the
bad news is.
Speaker 5 (17:12):
You can't, my brother, but you can keep throwing all
that money down her dream.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
See now now, now, now, smartsman's.
Speaker 5 (17:21):
Get what you call a prenupticial agreement to protect all
the worldly goods. Well, why not come up with something
to protect your big ticket what you call in fleshment.
If you getting a vibe that miss Nipping Tuck might
be fixing up, are you in n oft?
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (17:39):
Get her to sign what I likes to call a
pre niptial agreement, see, my brother, that gives you solely
ownership of all her afro mentioned a new opposter you did,
even if she's using it.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
I mean, ain't no sense in giving her everything. That's way.
Speaker 5 (17:59):
If she kicks you out first, she got to give
back the rack, unzip the lip, and reissue that big
rear end.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
So if she steps out of line and you gotta.
Speaker 5 (18:09):
Get your hands dirty and get things out of control,
you ain't kicking herd of the curb. You just rest
in the toe of yo shoe in that big round
rent to own re end.
Speaker 3 (18:20):
This is I peace out.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
If you want to exac mal the exac John Boy
Belle po box one nine one one one. Charlotte didn't
say two eight two one nine email anybody but me
at the Big Show dot com.
Speaker 3 (18:35):
Well, well, Betty Hill, where the key to bo.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Bro hand and you'll appreciate it.
Speaker 16 (18:49):
This is brother Jimmers Swagert all the way from button Urs, Louisiana,
begging you please don't let your children listen to this
so cold big show with uh Jay and Billy or
whatever their name is. Don't listen to it. Listen to something.
Speaker 8 (19:38):
Good morning.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
There's a big show on the radio. The lower just
a little lower our ways sports braves with my man
Terry Hanson was like man, Hank Aaron. It was just
honored when they hit seven hundred and fifteen home run.
It was the last week big deal of braves and stuff,
and I mean Hanson was there. Hang it, Hammer and Hank,
(20:02):
you go tell us the store man gotta hit that
on the anniversary we had. So that's what's going to happen. Also,
Tator Taman News just minutes away. Oh yeah, Big Show
rolls home. Good morning, Big shows on the radio. Coming up.
We played John Boyd Jeopardy Winner gets one hundred and
twenty dollars worth of bull Snot cleaning products made in
(20:24):
the USA. You know, drug drivers keep America moving, and
Bullsnot make sure they look good doing it. Find bull
Snot at truck stops across America or download the bull
Snot app. Click on the link at the Big Show
dot com. Hang all play in minutes. Right now, it's
time for tat Taman News. And here's that girl, Marcia
h tator More.
Speaker 6 (20:45):
Hey, you guys remember the nineties and you remember the
song You remember us talking about John Wayne bobbitts. Oh yeah,
I wrote a song about it right well, for those
kids that aren't sure or don't really remember it's a
husband wife as she said that he was treating her badly.
She used again sue knife, removed some of his man parts. Peace,
(21:09):
throw off, toss the toss it out the window. They
found it. They successfully sowed it back on. So he
was an amputee but was repaired. Well, he's an amputee again.
John Wayne Bobbitt has suffered another amputation, this time professionally done.
He lost his toes.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
Oh oh, he's.
Speaker 6 (21:28):
In the late stages of neurological issues, which he also
blames for his nineteen ninety three tabloid scandal. So really
don't understand how that is.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
But what that might affect other parts of your body
if I guess, yeah, it's vascular.
Speaker 9 (21:46):
Where you're going.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
She also blands.
Speaker 6 (21:50):
Well, that's according to the sun. So those are exciting
them all right?
Speaker 1 (21:54):
Moving on?
Speaker 6 (21:55):
Uh. Hannah Guteras read the Armor on the set of Rust,
was sentenced in her criminal case. She's going to prison
for a little while. The jury found her guilty over
the fatal shooting of Helena Hutchins. She was convicted of
manslaughter for her role in the death and received a
sentence of eighteen months. She will go to a woman's
(22:18):
correctional facility in the state of New Mexico.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
According to TMZ, does that mean Alec Baldwin is like
off the hook?
Speaker 18 (22:24):
No, No, he has a separate, completely different judge and jury.
Speaker 6 (22:29):
And a different charge. All right, colt Ford, we were
just talking about him. He suffered a heart attack, Oh
oh wow this past week and he according to tmzs
he's out of the woods, but he won't be well
enough to hit the stage anytime soon. So he is recovering,
but they have canceled the rest of his touring dates
(22:50):
this year.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
So I'm still in the hospital and yeah, when he
feels better.
Speaker 6 (22:55):
He's still in the hospital dealing with that. Morgan Wallen
was also in the news for chucking the chair over
the off the roof and went six stories and his
ex fiance it took to the tabloids and social media
to say, hey.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Have an ex fiance. Well you know, the.
Speaker 6 (23:14):
Taboys are reporting that he was upset because he found
out that she got married and that was an outburst
and she was like and so she went to social
media and said, yeah, keep my name out of it.
Speaker 10 (23:25):
All right, we broke up.
Speaker 6 (23:27):
We do have a child, I'm with this.
Speaker 1 (23:29):
Other guy had.
Speaker 3 (23:30):
Nothing to do with this. Keep my name out.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
She goes on social media to say, keep my name.
Speaker 6 (23:37):
Well, you have to fight back. I guess when it's
it's it's you know, reported on the John Boy Billy Show.
So by that point she's like, well, it made it there.
Speaker 10 (23:46):
I mean, just clear that up, right?
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Am I right?
Speaker 6 (23:51):
And a lot of people have been asking will President
Joe Biden and former President Donald Trump do a debate?
And so found out through CBS News that twelve news
organizations are pleading for them to do a debate.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Yes please, I say they do it with knives. Trump's
ever got size anywhere any place?
Speaker 6 (24:10):
Apparently one of his last stops he set it up.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
He set up a second podium.
Speaker 6 (24:18):
On stage with him with the sign saying anytime, anywhere,
bring it, Bring it.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Well, Biden has said he's willing.
Speaker 6 (24:25):
To debate Trump. So stay tuned, check your schedules, checked,
all your check all your news outlets because it might
be coming y'all.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
Will you see it?
Speaker 9 (24:38):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (24:39):
Baby, Well, thank you very much. Well, let's get us
a winner. Let's play John Boy Jeopardy review. Yesterday's question
we said, oh sure, they can fly but this is
something you have on your face that birds don't. It's
not a pecker's except for ostriches. They've got them too.
Oh boy, I meant to use that pecker line yesterday,
(24:59):
and I didn't just throw it. Go ahead and make
your own joke. Not yeah, you're right, should have set
it up. But anyway, let's say, go on with today's
John Boy Jeopardy. Okay, when talking with someone in Germany,
it is considered extremely impolite to do this with one
(25:21):
hand in your pocket. Scratch, impolite to do this, what
end in your pocket? I guess No. One eight hundred
Big Show you told free line. We played John Boy Jeopardy. Next,
(26:03):
Good morning, It's a big show on the radio. Will
Home into your Homeday, Wednesday, April seventeen. Today's feature track
from the Big Show Big Box brought you by show
Him on the Swedeway to Home in the Coca Cola
six hundred Sunday, May twenty six, The little Man in
the Jar with Rich Sinner Day, were just talking about
(26:24):
little vomit to whack whack here it is man's yard.
Some more of things of that nature. Searzburg key words
A little jar when you hit the big bit box
head right now, let's play yeahs live across America.
Speaker 18 (26:45):
It's John Boy Jepande Yeah and now a man whose
great uncle was responsible for bringing down twenty eight planes
during the war with Germany and still holds the record
as worst airplane mechanic ever.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
Boy, Let's say hey to Jerry at an Alma, Georgia.
Good morning, Jerry, Hey buddy, All right, Jerry, you got
the first shot at it this morning when talking with
When talking with someone in Germany, it's considered extremely impolite
(27:24):
to do this with one hand in your pocket.
Speaker 12 (27:30):
I'm bout say, what is shaking hand? John Boy?
Speaker 1 (27:32):
What is shaking hands? John Boy? And you are right, Jerry.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
They prefer you one at a time.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
Good work, Jerry. One dollars worth of bulls, not cleaning products.
Head down all before you Halla.
Speaker 12 (27:53):
Can I get a shout out? Yes, sir, we'll get
a shout out to my beautiful wife. For seven years
it was shout out all my customers about a cabin
sadors from lots of custom cabin Sinama, Georgia. And uh,
all my fellow Christians who are trying to live a
good life in this evil world.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
I hear you that al much. Damn I mean, Jared
down now, I'm I'm making no dick and we'll get
your dress. And Jared, I got you. Boddy, thank you
seven years. It's working on seven years. No wonder you're
still hallowluing it. Hey, I'm surprised he kept up with
this long awesome Boddy. Glad to have you listened. Glad
(28:32):
you won that boy you hang on.
Speaker 7 (28:34):
With Jaggie, Thank you, bottom of the hour.
Speaker 1 (28:44):
Top of your news. Oh Tom capsule good, Oh rest
my voice.
Speaker 16 (29:00):
M hm.
Speaker 13 (29:21):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 19 (29:36):
I've started answering my telephone. Oh man, Like that was
like a service, like one of the many services that
you called the problem.
Speaker 6 (29:44):
Like.
Speaker 13 (29:45):
For example, I'll call like on a Sunday afternoon when
ready knows I'm at the beach to check on my flight.
Speaker 19 (29:50):
I'll answer the phone by going, thank you for calling.
Too lazy to do it yourself. Travel services, I'm sorry,
but all of our all of our representative is busy.
You may choose from the following responses to tell the
representative you stupid. Press one.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
To choose you're killing men, press too to choose I
told you.
Speaker 19 (30:22):
This would happened to press three, and then, depending upon
what day it is, I'll answer with, thank you for
calling too lazy to install your own digital cable service.
I'm sorry, but all of our representative is busy at
your house.
Speaker 10 (30:44):
Look, I'm right over there by the coffee table.
Speaker 19 (30:48):
Thank you for calling too lazy to put your home
security too lazy to call the home security monitoring service yourself.
Speaker 3 (30:58):
He called me one afternoon.
Speaker 19 (30:59):
I swear he called me to tell me that the
sticker on his window was bothering him.
Speaker 10 (31:06):
If our sticker is bothering you, press one.
Speaker 3 (31:15):
It's right there on the window, right where I look.
Speaker 10 (31:17):
Out, or where a burglar would look in. Y.
Speaker 19 (31:22):
Have you considered taking, say, your fingernail and pulling it off?
Speaker 3 (31:25):
Guice way over there, cod fix it.
Speaker 19 (31:33):
If this is ed low calling, press the pound sign
to add you dumb you Christopher Reeve, Yes, bubble boy.
Speaker 3 (31:47):
What it's so funny is because he knows why I'm
calling me.
Speaker 19 (31:52):
What's even funnier is he'll actually press a button for
one of the choices, and I know which choice it is.
Speaker 1 (32:01):
Okay, all right, what we're doing?
Speaker 10 (32:03):
If you're calling from a rotary phone. What in the
world are you doing at rafers?
Speaker 19 (32:06):
Okay, right, you're too lazy to press any buttons.
Speaker 1 (32:12):
Please hold I'm okay, all right, come on, just get
back to work. We're at work. The latest thing, this
is it.
Speaker 19 (32:23):
The latest thing is he's got discount coupons for a
snack that he really likes that he's too lazy to
go to the grocery store to redeem.
Speaker 10 (32:31):
And he's panicking because they have an expiration date that's
coming up at the end of the month.
Speaker 3 (32:37):
And for three days I've heard nothing. But man, I'm
just I can't do nothing. I'm too stupid to even
go to the grocery store and.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Use these coupons.
Speaker 19 (32:46):
And he'll look at me with those eyebrows raised, waiting
on me to go.
Speaker 1 (32:49):
I'll do it, yes, Billy, I actually have to go
to the grocery store.
Speaker 17 (32:54):
For the COUPONEA if this was eighteen fifty, nobody you'd
be out there whitewashing a nobody.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
Why do I fence like you? Ready?
Speaker 9 (33:05):
Me and Becky Thatcher lost in the caves, nerve racking engine,
Joe run around the lander.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
I tell you this was gonna happen.
Speaker 10 (33:17):
Glad Mark Twain never met you.
Speaker 3 (33:20):
I knew somebody was going.
Speaker 12 (33:21):
I knew it.
Speaker 19 (33:23):
Yeah, you've heard it too, Jackie. I'm surprised that you've
dodged the bullet allready.
Speaker 3 (33:27):
You know what almost volunteer, But you guys walked out
of the room. Yeah, we've heard it too many times.
Speaker 12 (33:32):
I knew somebody he does that.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
Deprecating.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
Yeah, I'm sustudent.
Speaker 6 (33:41):
Run.
Speaker 19 (33:42):
Yes, if I could just get into the grocery store.
Speaker 3 (33:45):
Persons cupin for a week.
Speaker 10 (33:48):
And then I heard Billy say it's about to run out.
Speaker 3 (33:50):
I knew all it.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
Somebody wash man. I got stuff to.
Speaker 3 (33:56):
Do between know, and then I just want to know.
Did you volunteer?
Speaker 10 (34:00):
Where you volunteer?
Speaker 9 (34:01):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (34:01):
I finally said, just get me. I take it from it.
Speaker 19 (34:07):
I look at him and go, do you know how much.
Speaker 4 (34:09):
Money you make?
Speaker 1 (34:11):
Do you have any idea?
Speaker 19 (34:14):
I'm gonna go save like you know, two dollars on
the bond, bonds and crispy wafers.
Speaker 10 (34:21):
Saving money's making money?
Speaker 1 (34:25):
Never mind that?
Speaker 3 (34:25):
Do you know what you pay me? Make?
Speaker 9 (34:29):
And live on?
Speaker 3 (34:29):
What fosse of the.
Speaker 10 (34:30):
Cracks are here?
Speaker 1 (34:32):
A man does live exactly.
Speaker 15 (34:39):
I don't like that voice you used from me in
using it, John Boy and Dilly and I must have
spent six hours last April on that ten forty form.
Speaker 8 (34:54):
Easy my ass, Good morning radio, dumb right, good.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
Morning, this week show on the radio. About twenty minutes
to get up with Hanson. It's him some sports briefs.
You know, last week's anniversary Henry Aaron hitting seven hundred
and fifteen. Hanson was part of the Turner Sports during
that and said, you men, tell you about that? Said
you think? I said, that's what God has him about
(35:45):
hammering Hank. He was there do that in twenty minutes
right now, all right, this call waiting on Good morning
big show man. Hello, oy, this hoint all my life.
Speaker 9 (35:56):
I want to fight about it all right now.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
John Mornbella here there.
Speaker 9 (36:00):
You beggar.
Speaker 3 (36:00):
I'll hurry.
Speaker 9 (36:01):
No driving, nose picking, knuckles dragging. Self actualizing, perverse.
Speaker 1 (36:07):
Self actualizing that means fully living up to one's potential.
Speaker 9 (36:12):
Oh, the new reader's digest come yesterday. I was just
sitting here on the commode increasing my word part.
Speaker 1 (36:18):
Things with a visual So watching you over a temptation trailer.
Speaker 9 (36:22):
Well, old Deveris Nephew Dumas has been flopping here for
about a week.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
Now, Think I ever heard you talk about dumas before.
Speaker 9 (36:28):
Oh, he's the baby of the family, so of course
he knows. Ever dead gum fan got tired of fighting
with his mom and daddy, so he packed his clothes,
bought him a bus ticket, let out on the road
to Mature.
Speaker 1 (36:40):
Well how's it going so far? Na too?
Speaker 9 (36:43):
Yesterday morning, he says, got a little money saved up,
He's going out to buy him a car. Come sputtering
into the body shop about lunch time, driving this nasty
old sixty five Volkswagen bug, worst hunk of junk you
ever seen in your life. He says, you like it?
This my new car? I said, well, how about moving it?
It's leaking oil all over the parking lot. W'd you
get that thing anyway? Them says from his failer, Rufus
(37:07):
McGhee only give him one hundred dollars for it. I said,
well you still got jip. See Rufus McGee. He's one
of him. Shady tree Fellers sells cars out of his
front yard, the type. Remember Annie Griffith Show where Barney
bought that junkie car from old missus leash.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
Of course, I do.
Speaker 9 (37:23):
Yeah, Well, Rufus sells the one missus lesh turns down. Anyways,
I said, boy, take that piece of crab back over
here and make him give you your money back. He says, well,
wait a minute. I know it don't look like mush,
but I got it said cheap. I got some money
left over. Figured you and Debort could fix it up
for me. I says, son, that car ain't worth doing
nothing too, and I take it back. I was giving
(37:44):
him somebo what you call tough love, I says Debort.
You follow him over in the truck and give him
a ride back over here. So the two of them
drove off, and I picked up the phone. Called old Rufus,
I says, mister McGee. This, here's John d Rayford with
the Walt Disney coming. We're fixing to do us a
remake of herb Be the love Bug, and we're looking
for a Volkswagen Bug nineteen sixty five model, don't matter
(38:09):
what shape it's in, we're gonna fix it up. I'll
give you three hundred dollars for it, ol'd Rufe says man.
I wish you'd call me a half hour ago. I
had just the one you looking for I just sold it.
I says, well, let me give you my phone number.
If you run up on the more, I'm give me
a call. I figured when Duma showed up, Old Ruf
is about old car back fashion. You can pull a
(38:29):
greasy string out of cats, but that's good thinking.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
Did you get that one out of readers digest too?
Speaker 9 (38:34):
No, that one's original.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
Congratulations. So what happened?
Speaker 9 (38:37):
Well, about a half hour later they come back to
the body shop, both of them just smiling to beat
the band. I says, well, how to go, and Dom says,
pre dang good. I just went in there and told
old mister rufus McGee. I wasn't satisfied, he says, wheel
in allbright back from you. I said, see, I told
you all you gotta do? Is your a little backbone folks? Respect?
Yet just Endeavored says, well, wait, here's the part where
(39:00):
it gets good. I walked up and says, you think
you can sell it? Huh? And Ruf says yeah, I
got a fella wants to buy that very car. Devor says, well,
hold on there minute, we ain't finished the deal here yet.
How much is this fellow gonna give you? He says,
on three hundred dollars, and I says, one, maybe we
are to get a little piece of that money too,
(39:22):
you know. Rufe says, well, I tell you what I
give you back you one hundred dollars, you give me
the car, and when I sell it, we'll split the
other two hundred right down the middle. I says, you
got a deal, so back. Then I turns the Doomis
and says, so you got your money, And Devor says, hey,
we done even better than that. I give old Rufus
back one hundred dollars. He give me the feller's.
Speaker 7 (39:42):
Phone numbers.
Speaker 1 (39:47):
Strikes again.
Speaker 9 (39:49):
If done was gasoline, you wouldn't want to.
Speaker 1 (39:51):
Smoke around it.
Speaker 9 (39:52):
Hey, listen, I gotta run here.
Speaker 6 (39:53):
Me in the.
Speaker 9 (39:54):
CarMax twins suspecting good work. You gonna see Goober later on? Yeah,
well you tell him, I said, yeah, huh, he'll know
what you mean. Y'all came straight apart.
Speaker 19 (40:10):
Hey, baby, this is Sammy Davidson Junior, better known as
Tommy Davidson Jr.
Speaker 8 (40:14):
And I'm thrilled that you're listening to the Big Show
with John Boy and Billy.
Speaker 1 (40:19):
You can take a rainbow man bringing it with you.
Speaker 6 (40:30):
M H.
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