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The Alan Cox Show

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
The Federal Communications Commission has determined the following content to
be emotionally harmful.

Speaker 2 (00:07):
Funny things that you thinks funny aren't funny.

Speaker 3 (00:10):
Jimmy coxboll tex so lother me, Allan Coxshow, kicks ash Man, welcome.

Speaker 4 (00:16):
Welcome, you me what you do?

Speaker 5 (00:19):
I can see a lot of cocks on TV.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
Allen to me, Alan too.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
I don't know what it's about you, but I can't sad.

Speaker 4 (00:26):
This don't be a great so let's take it.

Speaker 3 (00:29):
Coffee, get that.

Speaker 2 (00:30):
You'll just eight with a tasty groove.

Speaker 5 (00:32):
Okay, what two three tickets?

Speaker 3 (00:36):
Take it?

Speaker 4 (00:36):
Tom damn put you one time? Take it? Allen, come
here we.

Speaker 6 (00:43):
Go, he'll add, tying it's the Allen Cox Show on
one hundred point seven double U M m as.

Speaker 5 (01:08):
Okay, Hey, what's going on? Good afternoon, Hi, getings, welcome
all that. My name's Alan Cox.

Speaker 2 (01:15):
Thank you for being here.

Speaker 5 (01:18):
Say hi to Bill Squire. He's here too. Hey you
behove you getting ready for game three? I'm ready. You're
all decked out. You've got your ticket? I got a
ticket four thirty. It starts today, so we'll do a
short show before thirties one.

Speaker 2 (01:35):
We'll roll out.

Speaker 5 (01:36):
Get that pre game going. Mary's out today, so you're
you're up in the up in the cheap seats. I
mean cheap is relatively speaking, right, which I don't mind.
I don't mind that seats, not like Mary. I want
to be there. I want to be in the environment.
I want to you know, I'm really hoping that the

(01:58):
Guards can turn it around and you can defend home
field and make us an interesting series. Well, they have
three chances to do it here at home. Is it
gonna be called up there? I haven't even really paid
attention to the Weather's like fifty five, like when when
the game starts can be around fifty five, But up
there it'll be you know, well windy, probably a little chili.

(02:20):
But I'll make you all right.

Speaker 2 (02:22):
Are you you're going solo or you're going with a group.

Speaker 5 (02:26):
I'm going with a buddy, all right.

Speaker 7 (02:30):
Uh.

Speaker 5 (02:30):
That first pitch today is around five o'clock, but four
thirty is when we will get going make way for
the coverage there. If you want to join us before then,
you can the phone numbers here two one, six, five
seven eight one double oh seven or eight hundred and
three four eight one double oh seven. I want to
send me a text. The number is three five, one
nine two. I'm gonna watch the show. You can find

(02:52):
the Alan Kasher YouTube channel. I my timing was impeccable.
I got a new pack of I like to keep
this studio smelling good. There are only two programs that
use this show. I use the studio rather. Mark Nolan
uses this room in the morning. He does the morning
show over there at Magic and he's got a reputation
of being quite smelly.

Speaker 2 (03:10):
So well, not him, but we're getting We're getting to it.

Speaker 5 (03:14):
And so I have one of these things that you
plug in that has the scent in it, right, the
airwick plug in with the oil, and I like to
keep it kind of a pine scent. I used when
we were back at oak Tree and we had an
Alan cock Show office. I was always burning like a
pine candle. I just like that smell.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
I like that smell too during Christmas. I like that smell.
I'm all year round. It's a smell. I enjoy a
great deal.

Speaker 3 (03:38):
I do the.

Speaker 5 (03:40):
I really get into the sense of the season. So
like right now I'm doing a lot of apple cinnamon
type candle.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
Pumpkin type stuff.

Speaker 5 (03:51):
The pumpkin stuff I don't like as much as the
apple cinnamon. Apple Cinnamon's pretty good. At least those tell
you what things are gonna smell like what I like,
or when they just throw a couple of things together
and then give it a name, you know, some of
these they're labeled. When I was buying these pine ones,
there was one that, to the best of my knowledge,
what I could tell was they took vanilla and they

(04:13):
mixed it with something else, and the scent was called
cuddle Weather. M I obviously we understand what they're trying
to evoke there. I don't know how they landed on
vanilla and something else to get to cuddle Weather, but
that's the name one of them. But anyway, so I
have one of these brand new pine oil plugins in here, and.

Speaker 2 (04:34):
I think the room smells pretty good.

Speaker 5 (04:36):
And so I'm in here this morning and I'm putting
some things together and dog comes walking in and I
hadn't seen her for a moment. So we were having
a chat and she's like, oh, you should come with
me and let's go have a beer. And I go,
I'm putting the show together. I'm not going to go
do that. And she's got a christmaswater on and she
explains to me today was the first poor okay of

(05:00):
Smith's ale for Great Lakes, And I said, well, I
will pass.

Speaker 2 (05:04):
I'm not going to go do that.

Speaker 5 (05:06):
And of course she was chastising me, trying to get
me to do this, and I said, no, I'm not
going to go do that, but please go have a
good time. And she's trying to get you to go
to West twenty fifth, not just to go like, well,
they're around the corner. She she goes, oh, it's a
few minutes away. I'm like, I'm I'm working right now,
Like I can't. You guys just got off the air.
You can go do whatever you want to do. I

(05:26):
still have my show in front of me. Whatever.

Speaker 8 (05:28):
And so.

Speaker 5 (05:30):
She's standing next to me, like right here at the
corner of the console and we're talking and she crouches
all the way down to the floor like she's doing
a deep, deep squat. Has she already been drinking?

Speaker 2 (05:41):
Well no, and she you know, I mean, she and
I go way back, I mean before even Cleveland.

Speaker 5 (05:47):
And I go, what are you doing? And I said,
are you farting? And she goes, no, I'm just trying
to get things going, you know. I guess she was
maybe having a little bit of an issue, and so
she goes, you don't never squat down to like you
get the train. I go no, I go three times
a day. I can set my watch on it. Trains
are running on time. Boy, morning, midday and night is

(06:08):
when I go. And that might be too much, what
do I know, But that's what I think. If it's regular,
and if once a week, yeah, if it's I mean,
I think it's more the consistency of the actual pooda.
There you make you worried.

Speaker 2 (06:20):
Well anyway, so we're laughing, and of course I'm kidding.

Speaker 5 (06:22):
I'm like, you have to finish. She goes no, and
then she gets up and she goes, well, if you
change your mind, we're going to go over the thing.
I always say, okay, And she's on our way to
the studio door, and she farts in this room and
then walks away and leaves it in here, and now
it has to fight with the pine.

Speaker 2 (06:41):
Right before that, it wasn't fighting the pine, wasn't fighting
with anything. It was just making everyone's life better. Who
walked in here?

Speaker 5 (06:49):
And now again, in full disclosure, I didn't really catch
any of it.

Speaker 2 (06:55):
Wafting over here. But I said, I have to tell you.

Speaker 5 (06:58):
I said, I you know, I'm I'm in one way
gratified that we're comfortable enough on our relationship where you
can just let one go right there in front of me.

Speaker 2 (07:08):
But I said, but please don't do that anymore. And
here I got some audio of it.

Speaker 5 (07:14):
Oh, so yeah, it was definitely not an SBD, but
it was audible, of course. But so that was how
I started my morning, was with her letting one go
in here. But I guess they're doing that first Poor today.

(07:36):
And again also full disclosure, I am not as enamored
of Christmas Ale as everyone else is, so that was
no big enticement to get me the first event and
go like, the first Poor event is really fun though.

Speaker 2 (07:48):
No, no, I get it.

Speaker 5 (07:48):
I've gone to it before, you know, in years past,
and it is it's it's a good time. So I
guess they were going over to do that. But you know,
Cleveland scene is having that best of Cleveland party to
know stuff going on. I didn't know if you were
going to that.

Speaker 2 (08:01):
Adam the game.

Speaker 5 (08:03):
I'm going to the game. Then I got my show
high and dry. But then there's also a Romo Fijo
thirtieth anniversary party that's going on tonight. I was invited
to that, but I'm gonna skip it because after the
game in High and Dry, I'm gonna be toast a
lot of things going on tonight in the city of Cleveland,
and then this Saturday, of course, I'm gonna be down

(08:25):
in Canton and can get tickets for that at Bill
squire dot com. I can't, Ohio, you can't know Hio
in drunk Sue's neck of the woods, that's right.

Speaker 2 (08:32):
Do you think she'll show up?

Speaker 5 (08:33):
I don't think so. Oh Okay, she's got a lot
going on right now.

Speaker 2 (08:36):
She sure does so her old man is infirmed.

Speaker 5 (08:39):
Yeah, so uh. Sending love to you, Sue. I hope
things work out, but I understand if you can't make it,
And if they were, guy, I'm gonna say, if they
work out quicker than you had anticipated, feel free to
go see Bill's show on Saturday. Have you ever been
impregnated with?

Speaker 3 (09:01):
Well?

Speaker 9 (09:01):
Also, it looks like you're showing welcome back to your
nude daddy.

Speaker 5 (09:07):
Alan COXWMMS T five seven eight one double O seven
If you want to join us live or eight hundred
and three, four eight one, double O seven Ethos Carrie
King tickets for you about a half an hour.

Speaker 2 (09:26):
If you're a Slayer fan.

Speaker 5 (09:28):
He's back doing some solo dates, one of which will
be end of January. Around the corner here at the
House of Blues, about ten minutes away, nine minutes away
from the next keyword could get you one thousand dollars
courtesy of the Buzzard bookie. So you get a few
of those from you about thirty past before we roll
out at four thirty for Guardians pregame Game three tonight

(09:51):
five O eight is your first pitch next three games
here at home at Progressive Field. Obviously, I don't have
to tell you the state of the situation right now.
The Dodgers wailed on the.

Speaker 2 (10:03):
Mets last night. How many people are paying attention to
that series? But the eight to nothing last night?

Speaker 5 (10:11):
And uh, you know, listen, this could very well be
a let's let's put the best case scenario. You could
have a Dodgers Guardians world series. Would that would that
scratch you where you itch? That's just what everybody wants,
Dodgers Guardians dying for them. They don't want the Subway series.

(10:33):
They don't want Yankees Mets. The only people that care
about that are people in the Tri State area, in
the New York Dodgers Guardians.

Speaker 2 (10:42):
I would like to see that.

Speaker 5 (10:43):
I would love that. Dodgers are up two games to
one in that series. So the Mets are flailing. But
they had ice cold bats last night, and then the
Cavaliers lost too. It's still preseason ball. Everybody's figuring out
where they belong and what they're going to look like.
But they lost to the Pistons last night, who were

(11:04):
a terrible team last season. Maybe they will be in
better shape. This one away to ninety two was the
final last night. Calves will play preseason ball again tomorrow night.
They'll be at the United Center in Chicago to play
the Bulls. And you'll hear that, I think on MMS.
I think we're airing the Calves tomorrow night. But tonight

(11:26):
you will hear the Guardians. And you can use the
promo code Eerie. If you want to get some stuff
at cl clothing company, use Eerie and you'll get twenty
percent off whatever you want. It is a Halloween time,
so eerie works. Spell it like that or like the Lake.
They probably don't care my Chicago White Sox look like

(11:46):
they might finally, finally, finally be up for sale. This guy,
Jerry Reinsdorf, who is one of the most locally, he's
not a popular guy. He owns the White Sox and
the Chicago Bulls, and they have been begging him for
a while to put the White Sox up for sale.
And the cherry on top was this past season, and

(12:06):
he's always said he's not going to do it. They'll
figure it out. I think maybe this might even be
the camel that the straw that broke that camel's back.
So he is reportedly in ongoing talks to possibly unload
the White Sox, and it makes you clench when you
read how little these guys bought these teams for back

(12:27):
in the day. He bought the White Sox in nineteen
eighty one. He owned the White Sox four or five
years before he bought the Bulls. If you remember the
Michael Jordan documentary, Jerry Reinsdorf was featured prominently in that
because he's been the owner for a long long time
and he's a very very divisive figure in Chicago sports.

Speaker 2 (12:47):
But he bought the.

Speaker 5 (12:48):
White Sox in nineteen eighty one for twenty million dollars.
That's so crazy, right when these guys. If you bought
a professional sports franchise, one of the big three late seventies,
early eighties, even into the late eighties, that's what you
were getting it for twenty million dollars. White Sox, even
though they just had the season that they had. They're

(13:10):
worth about two billion dollars. So that's a pretty good
And he's the majority owner. He hasn't owned the whole thing,
but he he would stand to make the most money.
That's a pretty good return on investments. Yeah, that's pretty solid.

Speaker 2 (13:23):
You've held on to her for forty years.

Speaker 4 (13:25):
Uh huh.

Speaker 2 (13:27):
They weren't forty one and one twenty one, so it
might be. It might be, you know.

Speaker 5 (13:33):
And he released a letter to the fans like you
do end of the season, and there wasn't much shine
to put on what happened. But he bought the Chicago
Bulls for sixteen million dollars before Michael Jordan was even
on the team. And the Bulls are now about a
five billion dollar franchise. So he's not doing anything with them.

(13:57):
He's not going to let them go. But a buddy
of mine who does sports radio in Chicago. He sent
me the story. He goes, it looks like Jerry might
be open to selling the socks, and I'm like, now,
be careful what you wish for, because you just might
get it.

Speaker 2 (14:11):
You never know.

Speaker 5 (14:11):
I mean these days, you know, teams get sold to
guys that have no interest in sports. They just want
the flex or it's an existing billionaire or whatever. So
you never know what you're gonna get. But some of
those people, what if Michael Jordan buys.

Speaker 2 (14:26):
Him, Well, isn't he part owner of the Hornets?

Speaker 5 (14:29):
He was. I think he sold his interest. I think
he's divested his interest in that. Well, maybe he will,
maybe that is one of the interested parties that he's
talking with.

Speaker 2 (14:40):
But you know, this is also generational wealth.

Speaker 5 (14:42):
So a lot of these people who own these franchises,
they just want to pass them to their kids. That's
how the guy who just moved the Oakland A's that's
how he got the team. His dad was a super
rich guy and gave him the team. But Jerry Rhyan's
door's son is the guy who currently runs the Bulls. Yeah,
Jordan's sold them the Hornets last year. August of twenty

(15:07):
twenty three, so maybe he's right. Splash, make a new splash.
He was baseball, Yeah, sure, he played for the Barons, right,
that was the Yeah, they had him suiting up for
the White Sox for a cup of coffee. Yeah, so
we'll say, hey, Scott.

Speaker 4 (15:24):
Yeah, we're gonna switch gears here now, baseball fans, how are.

Speaker 10 (15:30):
You going, Scott?

Speaker 2 (15:31):
How are you hey?

Speaker 4 (15:32):
I called Monday and said I was the first time caller,
which is actually not true. You were talking five six
years ago. They were talking about you being fired.

Speaker 10 (15:45):
Your contract was up coming up, and.

Speaker 4 (15:49):
I called in about three rings you were cos I
know I heard you got fired. I think you hung
up or so I hung up on.

Speaker 10 (15:59):
You were sign know what happened?

Speaker 5 (16:02):
Yeah, there's there's a lot of there's there's a lot
of Scott. There's a lot in that story that doesn't
track there. There was no conversation about be being fired.
And I don't pick up my own phones.

Speaker 4 (16:11):
Well, no, it was the mm's phone.

Speaker 10 (16:14):
And that was the buzz around Cleveland.

Speaker 5 (16:18):
The buzz around Cleveland was that the number one show
was going to have its host fired.

Speaker 4 (16:23):
Hey, Brian and Joe quite.

Speaker 9 (16:28):
Right?

Speaker 2 (16:29):
Yes, right, Well, I know what a big Brian and
Joe Fan. You were Scott. You made that very very clear,
and that's I think that's warranted. They were huge.

Speaker 4 (16:41):
I was on their last show. I got duped.

Speaker 2 (16:44):
There was you got duke. What do you mean?

Speaker 4 (16:47):
There was an airplane and people were looking out the
window when they saw Jesus in the clouds and they're
not talking like Trump. But anyways, I go, I got this.
I was in tennis See. We broke up Nashville. Ye h,
I was on Nashville's Finest wild Horse Saloon. I'm ye

(17:09):
a cowboy moved a hat and a shirt. So I
called Brian and Joe and say, hey, I heard I've seen.
I got video on my Sonio camcorder. It was a
little eight millimeter tapes. I said, I got a picture
of me. And I got home and the girlfriend laughed.
She met some guy in Tennessee and I said, I'll

(17:31):
come and show you this picture.

Speaker 5 (17:34):
Of Jesus in the clouds.

Speaker 4 (17:36):
I was there on their last day. I'm sitting out
there in the parking lot because I was the cable guy.
Get her done, and they don't come meet Cheryl. Cheryl
was had some roses. There was one guy there and
they take me. I'm on for two hours in the

(17:58):
morning and then they go, here's the rose the calculation Prize.
I wasn't there to meet nobody. I didn't win, but
they laughed at me. They took me. They go, you're
gonna be a millionaire and put this on the internet.
I never did. I'd never watched that tape.

Speaker 3 (18:20):
I still have it.

Speaker 4 (18:22):
But he goes, you're gonna have TCP why Jesus and
mcleouds the yogurt?

Speaker 5 (18:32):
So thank you, Scott. I'm starting to think that maybe
a little Scott goes a long way. Yeah, I think so.
I think I don't play off.

Speaker 2 (18:39):
Thank you, Thanks Scott.

Speaker 5 (18:44):
Did you get any of that?

Speaker 7 (18:45):
Did you.

Speaker 11 (18:47):
Why?

Speaker 5 (18:47):
He was a throwback? I haven't heard that in a while,
but yeah, I was having a hard time following. Well,
he was on the Old Brian and Joe Show and
he got so they thought that he wanted a date
or I don't know. Well. Fox eight is reporting that
the Browns have confirmed their move to Brook Park. I

(19:08):
saw that.

Speaker 2 (19:09):
Yeah, man, is that really? Is that going to suck?

Speaker 5 (19:13):
I mean, I mean I don't like it, but really,
but isn't going to be a massive what they're planning
is just some massive entertainment complex and people are going
to want to.

Speaker 3 (19:21):
Go to that.

Speaker 5 (19:22):
I'm sure they will, but you don't want to go out.
I still don't like it. Yeah, I live closer to
downtown than I do. Well, yeah, I understand that. Also.

Speaker 2 (19:30):
Also, this isn't going to be for like, this isn't tomorrow.

Speaker 5 (19:32):
It's like another three or four years, right, So they
have so many bad decisions that they are going to
make between the opening of this complex and then you're
saying it will be a smooth transition. I mean, it
doesn't matter where they are. Look at what the Hasms
have done to the Browns franchise with the on the

(19:52):
field stuff. Yeah, so we'll see how the auf the
field stuff goes.

Speaker 2 (19:56):
Yep, Hams should sell the team, he should sell the Okay,
well there you go. Maybe he will. Maybe Jerry Reinsdorf
will buy the Cleveland Browns.

Speaker 5 (20:06):
How about that? Maybe we could go in how much
you got on you maybe we got quite the four
billion or whatever it's worth. Well, we'll get a group
of investries, we'll get a consortium together and then.

Speaker 2 (20:20):
Take care of that.

Speaker 5 (20:22):
And today we're hearing from the players what they think
of this plan or the authority was out had practice earlier. Today.

Speaker 2 (20:28):
She has a story for US tonight.

Speaker 5 (20:30):
Last practice out here in Borea with fans before the
very first preseason game on Saturday. That's not How old
is that, Jess Christ This is part of a breaking
news article. They're on nineteen's website and they have some
two week old piece of video that's more than two
weeks old. Yeah, preseason game game, that's that's two months old. Right, Well,
there you go. Okay, So they've made it official that

(20:52):
they will move out to brook Park.

Speaker 12 (20:54):
There.

Speaker 5 (20:55):
The lease over here on the lake front runs through
twenty twenty eight. A domed stadium. This is what people
say they want, we want a dome. You're gonna get one.
You'll just have to go out by the airport. You
can fly in, you can run across the highway, and
you can go to the Browns game. So the team's lease,

(21:18):
it's with the city obviously over there, that ends in
at twenty twenty eight, and then they will move out
to brook Park. In shifting economic activity to brook Park.

Speaker 6 (21:30):
Well weaken, weaken these public assets and be a net negative,
not a positive, but a net negative for the region.

Speaker 5 (21:41):
And like many urban cities. Missus mayor bib Obviously he's
not pleased to weans because it goes out of Cleveland
across the country. They just approve that short front, yes,
like sixty million dollars to make it a boulevard.

Speaker 6 (21:52):
Still recovering from the COVID nineteen pandemic.

Speaker 5 (21:56):
Throw COVID eyes of remote work.

Speaker 6 (21:59):
They're intent, if it indeed proves to be viable, would
move jobs, development and access away from the urban core.

Speaker 5 (22:10):
Oh, think about all those Brook Parkers who are going
to be just a wash in fun and excitement out there.
You have to imagine that there's people who are going
to you know, is this situation. I know it's on
a huge swath of already developed land, but you know,

(22:30):
these kinds of projects, when the scope is that big,
they always end up being a little bit more complicated
than people expect. And I wonder if there's going to
be any part of this that requires eminent domain out
Thurnbrook Park right, Like somebody knocks at your door and goes, hey,
we need to buy your house because we have to
tear it down. That happens all the time with big

(22:51):
industrial projects, and there's lawsuits involved and things like that.
But obviously the Browns have been there on the lakefront
since nineteen forty six, is what this says. So yeah,
they'll go out there in a few years and people
will be able to talk about this and chew it
over and blah blah blah. But I bet that once

(23:14):
they do it, everybody's gonna love it. Now, what will
they use the lake Front stadium for? Oh S team?
Probably going to be torn down? Oh really, yeah, they
won't use it for women's soccer. Couldn't they use it for?

Speaker 1 (23:36):
Hello?

Speaker 5 (23:37):
Couldn't they use it? I thought they were gonna already
build some women's pro soccer stadium on the lake Front.

Speaker 1 (23:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (23:44):
I don't know if they need it to be a
seventy thousand seats over there. No, but it's what I'm saying,
is already there, right, You know what I'm saying, it's
already there. Well, yes, I don't know. I don't know
what's going to happen to it, but I'm I'm for
one em bummed about out the Browns movie to Brook
Part listen if it makes you feel any better. As

(24:05):
soon as that thing opens, they're still going to be
paying to Shaan Watson yeah, right, so that'll make you
feel real good. Twenty twenty eight doesn't matter, there's no
paying them. He's done by then. Uh huh, he's twenty
twenty six, is his left? Well, yeah, they'll be paying
him something. They'll they'll restructure something. So he's got to
get the Bobby Benia situation.

Speaker 1 (24:24):
Hey, Ale, listen to the podcast from wednesday.

Speaker 5 (24:27):
You were talking about the lady that filed the lawsuit
for not getting a fairwell card.

Speaker 1 (24:32):
You know what they should have done. They should have
gotten a farewell card and then everybody could put in it.

Speaker 7 (24:39):
Get out of here.

Speaker 1 (24:39):
Banana breath, What the hell have you just been banana?

Speaker 4 (24:45):
That would be great.

Speaker 5 (24:47):
We should get made.

Speaker 2 (24:48):
Get out of here. Banana bread just sitting there laughing
to herself.

Speaker 5 (24:51):
Are you okay?

Speaker 2 (24:52):
Do you need to leave the room.

Speaker 5 (24:53):
He's been put in an uncomfortable situation. What are some
things she could say?

Speaker 2 (24:58):
Back away? Banana breath? What the hell did you just
eat a banana?

Speaker 5 (25:04):
I'm sure that's what she'd like to say, totally. Banana
breath is a great Oh that's an epic burn. That's
an epic burn. Let's make sure its from I think
you should lead if people aren't hip to that show. Yeah,
and they Detroiter's. I think they had the information it
went on Netflix yesterday, So what's on there now? Yeah,

(25:27):
and I think people thought it was going to be
on there on Tuesday. I was watching the pilot episode
and when they go to get beers and like, we
have two beers and the bartender goes cold. They're hot,
and they're like cold. Why would anybody.

Speaker 2 (25:42):
Wants a hot beer?

Speaker 5 (25:44):
I mean it does say like, you know, listen on
a cold, cold Cleveland day, a nice hot beer.

Speaker 2 (25:50):
Oh, just bubbly and warm.

Speaker 5 (25:53):
They don't heat up Christmas Ale, right, they did the
first poor this morning.

Speaker 2 (25:56):
They don't.

Speaker 5 (25:57):
They don't hate that up ice cold. Yeah, that is
a quandary. I mean, when you like beer, you don't
necessarily it always comes cold. But in the winter time
it's not necessarily something you want to be drinking a
cold beverage. So somebody needs to really dip their toe
into the hot beer market and see if anything can

(26:17):
happen there. In that second episode where Ned the security
guard comes, they get the motorcycle, so they just want
to go out and right on their motorcycle. So they
have the security guard do the pitch and he comes
up with the dancing in the with the hand in
the pocket and he's pitching, and he was like, you
got a nice neck. And that's a compliment that a

(26:39):
lot of people, that's an underrated compliment. You've got a
nice neck. It's great.

Speaker 2 (26:42):
Yeah, you're like a swan.

Speaker 5 (26:45):
That's right. Mark and brook Park says, you can come
and tailgate in my backyard unless my house is born
up for the new stadium. Hey, which case baby, Yeah,
Mike and Arma says, if the mayor was smart, he
started digging the pedestrian tunnel from the muni lot to
brook Park. There you go.

Speaker 2 (27:05):
Now, let's fund that project.

Speaker 3 (27:07):
Right.

Speaker 5 (27:07):
You just party there in the muni lot and then
you start the three hour walk to brook Park. You
have to time it out properly. But do you think
that this will lead to a resurgence? Do you think
that it will revitalize the brook clubs, the strip joints
on brook Park Road. I mean, that's the that's relining,

(27:29):
that's relining of everything. If it, you know, brings brook
pack Park strip clubs back to prominence, yes, everything old
will be new again, including those strippers.

Speaker 9 (27:43):
They've been described as juvenile ridiculous moronics, smug and unlistenable.

Speaker 5 (27:50):
They've also gotten some bad reviews.

Speaker 13 (27:53):
I give it two thumbs in my ears, so I
don't have to listen.

Speaker 5 (27:56):
Chase Allen Cock Show three, sem me a text if
you want, you can watch the show in the Alancock

(28:17):
Show YouTube channel.

Speaker 2 (28:18):
Before it there, Adam and Canton said that you microwaved
the beer once and it was not good.

Speaker 5 (28:25):
Well that's Canton, you say. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (28:29):
Do you know anything about Canton? Have you ever been there?

Speaker 8 (28:32):
I do.

Speaker 5 (28:32):
I was there last January, and I'm gonna be there
again this Saturday at the Patina Arts Center in Canton
where the Canton Comedy Booms one year Birthday Party.

Speaker 2 (28:43):
Wait, you haven't performed in Canton since January of this year.

Speaker 5 (28:48):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (28:48):
So it's it's really a return.

Speaker 5 (28:51):
It's a big return for you, like coming back to
Canton as a conquering hero along those lines.

Speaker 2 (28:59):
So Bill and South Jersey? Hello, all right?

Speaker 10 (29:03):
How you doing?

Speaker 5 (29:04):
What's going on here?

Speaker 1 (29:04):
I caught up there. I caught up after I heard
you talk about the stadium full disclaedere. I've been to
Cleveland three times, two times in the late nineties and
most recently in twenty ten. I might be the only
bureau chief I would say this, but I actually like Cleveland.

Speaker 2 (29:19):
Well yeah, I mean, so you haven't been to Cleveland
since twenty ten.

Speaker 1 (29:27):
Yes that's correct.

Speaker 5 (29:28):
Yeah, okay, no way to know how long it's been.
But I don't sound like a long time. Some quick math,
but it sounds like yeah, And so your your thought.

Speaker 1 (29:36):
Is what, Well, my thought is the fact of moving
the stadium in the book Park. I know Bill didn't
particularly like it for you know, his own concerns, but
I kind of think maybe that's a good thing because maybe.

Speaker 10 (29:53):
That's not necessarily the best use on the waterfront.

Speaker 1 (29:56):
Right like after they moved the stadium, have this WI
diffront player so available, and who knows, maybe they could
build a couple of spifful toweries there or something like that.

Speaker 5 (30:07):
Yeah, I mean the city, the city of Cleveland, legitimately,
the city of Cleveland has got its work cut out
for it because there's a lot of money that comes
from those football games.

Speaker 2 (30:20):
It goes to the city of Cleveland.

Speaker 5 (30:22):
So it's not just I mean again, these things always
go back to money, and so you know, if the
haslms get to put their arms around the whole thing,
you know, and not to kick back to Cleveland or whatever.

Speaker 2 (30:34):
I mean, that's you know, better for them. I assume.

Speaker 5 (30:37):
I don't know how these things work from a tip
to taint, but that's ah. And there's only so much
Cleveland could do to keep them. By the way, you know,
there is a finite tax base in the city of Cleveland,
so they were as slightly hamstrung over this. But again,
I think as far as fans go, you're gonna have
people grousing about it because they're used to going to

(30:58):
that stadium, going to the lake. Can I get it.
I understand. You know, my team, the Bears, they were
talking about moving them. They were talking about doing the
exact same thing for the exact same reason, because the
billionaire owners kick and scream until they get what they want,
whether that's in the form of subsidies that we pay,
you know, or whatever. And then I think they finally said, ah,

(31:20):
we'll keep it at Soldier Field. But there is a
psychological cost to moving it out there. But once people
get out there and they see all the bells and
whistles and the shiny crap, all is going to be forgiven.
People are not going to care. But for the city
of Cleveland financially, that's a hit point.

Speaker 1 (31:38):
Well, I understand my thought about that, and so I
don't know that it would make up the revenue on that.
To think about the idea of having some type of
new community where the stadium is right and all the
places that people go to les I guess maybe on
the West sixth Street it's the nearest thing that people
go to hang out for the stadium.

Speaker 5 (31:56):
Yeah, And so if there.

Speaker 1 (31:58):
Was an actual community with people living there and working there,
you know, all the time, I don't know, that might
be more beneficial to the people who have those type
of entertainment and recreational businesses nearby, because now you've got
people there all the time instead of just the eight
Sundays or nine Sundays a year that football is being

(32:21):
played in the stadium.

Speaker 9 (32:22):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (32:23):
Yeah, uh, Bill, I'm going to be back in Jersey
next weekend for a wedding.

Speaker 1 (32:28):
Well, good for you.

Speaker 5 (32:33):
He's like, oh, he threw it right back to me,
didn't he. Oh what's good for the Goose Boys for
the Gander All right, thank you? Bill J.

Speaker 2 (32:44):
In South Jersey of course, Yeah, I know he does
just the partyments. I fully understand.

Speaker 5 (32:52):
Yes, I understand going to the going to the Muni
lot and you know, I get all that, and you're
right by the lake.

Speaker 2 (33:02):
Now you're going to be fully landlocked.

Speaker 5 (33:05):
So you know, despite what the name is, I don't
think there's even a brook there is there.

Speaker 2 (33:11):
I don't know is there a brook in brook Park?

Speaker 5 (33:13):
Maybe one of the strip clubs. Yeah, that's with an
E on the end. All right, boy, this Liam Payne thing.
By the way, he clearly committed suicide. I think that's
the conclusion that we're coming to, is that he You
don't fall off a third floor balcony, right.

Speaker 2 (33:27):
Maybe he did.

Speaker 5 (33:27):
I think there was a lot of drug paraphernalia in
the room. He had been having a very difficult time.
He had been going through some pretty acrimonious stuff with
his ex fiance in court. Liam Payne was one of
the guys from One Direction who the story broke yesterday
that he fell off of his third floor hotel balcony.

Speaker 2 (33:47):
I think that the inference is that he jumped.

Speaker 5 (33:51):
A lot of people were flaming TMZ because I don't
know how they do it.

Speaker 13 (33:56):
Man.

Speaker 5 (33:56):
This was in Argentina, for God's sake, and TMZ had
photos of like his body on the sidewalk in front
of the hotel or something. So people are giving them
a really hard time for posting those photos.

Speaker 2 (34:09):
I think they took them down with the quickness. But
that's kind of.

Speaker 5 (34:12):
TMZ's thing, is that's how you get all those eyeballs
and all those clicks. I'm constantly amazed and how quickly
TMS gets stuff. So people were really upset with that
whole thing, but it certainly seems like that this was

(34:32):
a suicide. There was a nine to one one call
too from a hotel staff. It's all in Spanish obviously, but.

Speaker 2 (34:45):
Well, you know what I mean.

Speaker 5 (34:45):
We called Dimond, yeah whatever, whatever their thing is, and
a guy called and said, hey, I'm calling from this
hotel and we just had I think we just had
somebody jump from their a hotel balcony.

Speaker 2 (35:02):
And it was Liam Payne.

Speaker 5 (35:03):
He was only thirty one years old, and so you've
seen all kinds of celebrity shout outs to him, not
least of whom are his former bandmates.

Speaker 2 (35:10):
In one direction, they're all gutted, as they would say.

Speaker 5 (35:16):
And those guys all auditioned for a show called X
Factor when they were like in their teens, and the
first time this guy auditioned, Simon Kyle said no thanks,
and they had auditioned again a couple of years ago
and they assembled that band into one direction. But his
ex was She was on a podcast recently before all

(35:39):
this happened. Obviously, he was talking about how like he
always said he was going to die early and we've
had a lot of problems and blah blah blah.

Speaker 14 (35:45):
He would always message me ever since we broke up, like, oh,
I'm not well.

Speaker 2 (35:49):
He would always play with death and be like, well,
I'm going to die. I'm not doing well.

Speaker 14 (35:54):
I know the lifestyle he lives and there is where
something that is going to happen. So I would always
be like, Okay, he's saying these things. I have to
help him because if I don't, I will never be
able to live with myself if something does happen to him.

Speaker 2 (36:08):
There is one time I tried to get him help.

Speaker 14 (36:10):
He was like not taking it. And it's just always
the same site. Like for example, when I announced my book,
he did the same thing. He called my mom, I
think I'm not going to be around much.

Speaker 2 (36:19):
Longer, drawing queen AnyWho.

Speaker 5 (36:24):
So yeah, the person who called the emergency line there
in Buenos Aires said, this guy's in his room. He's
trashing the place. Clearly there's some drugs and alcohol and
the premises. So there were a lot of stories going around.
There were also photos of the room going around. I
don't know if those were legit. If they were, there
was a lot there was like a smash TV and

(36:45):
there's drug paraphernalia, and so the call to the emergency
services was like, we have a guest who's really high
and when he's conscious, he's destroying the room. So I
don't know that they've ascertained whether or not he did
jump or if he was just so heavily under the
influence that he did fall.

Speaker 2 (37:05):
But they're like.

Speaker 5 (37:07):
He died on the scene, you know, because they were like,
you jump from that height and you're not gonna lived
traumatic external and internal injuries. So but most of the
stories on it are, you know, like that he fell,
but it sounds like, I mean, obviously he did fall,

(37:29):
but jumping is falling too. I mean, jumping is the
precursor to falling. Falling is just like, eh, I fell
off my balcony. But put all that together, he's having
a real hard time with his ex fiance that girl there,
woman named Maya Henry and they're in this protracted legal

(37:50):
battle and he's in the room, you know, doing drugs
or whatever. And that's not a recipe for having a
good time. But again, I don't know, literally, I I
didn't really know that band. I know these guys who
are bigger as solo artists. Everybody talks about Henry Styles,
Harry Sorry, Harry Styles. This is see what I'm saying, Like,

(38:13):
I don't you know Harry Styles. Harry Styles is definitely
the one that He's the one that got the lion
Sheriff Zane was the first one to leave the band.
But I don't really know. Yeah, I don't like even
that band was a little My kids were kind of
into it, but they were more Jonas brothers and stuff
like that. Okay, Hey Joe, Yeah, oh gosh, whatt what Joe?

(38:43):
Nine one one is what somebody said? The number is
there in Argentina. Joe, can you believe it? The audacity? Okay?

Speaker 12 (38:53):
Then hey, I got some I got some other nice news.
And it pertains my get my social security I'm retired,
and she gets a cracking me up, and and uh,
I had to call my social Security representative and then

(39:18):
she got me into the Medicaid Medicare plan and I'm
really ecstatic about that. I mean, it's all happening now.
So uh, to change the subject. Sorry about the guy
jumping off the drug.

Speaker 5 (39:32):
Addict, That's okay, you know, Joe, You're just your call
is kind of We've gotten a handful of like random calls, uh,
from people on random subjects, and I'm kind of my
brain is trying to find a thread between them, and
I'm having a hard time.

Speaker 2 (39:49):
Not your fault.

Speaker 12 (39:53):
So have you got any good news?

Speaker 2 (39:56):
I mean it sounds like you. It sounds like you've
got the good news part t taken care of.

Speaker 5 (40:00):
Joe.

Speaker 12 (40:02):
Yes, I got it, and I'm happy, and I just
want to broadcast it out.

Speaker 5 (40:07):
I want to let the whole world know. You want
to shout it from the rooftops that I do.

Speaker 12 (40:12):
But I'm gonna I'm not going to jump off no
bel can he and I don't do drugs or nothing
like that. I just drink beer.

Speaker 2 (40:19):
That's about drink beer hot or cold.

Speaker 12 (40:23):
Oh well, it depends on the day, what I'm saying.

Speaker 5 (40:29):
Right, Okay, thank you, Joe. There's Joe who wanted to
check in with this bill. But you understand what I'm saying.
We're getting like random calls from guys. Scott called that's
un unleashed, a certain type of caller.

Speaker 2 (40:42):
You think that's what it is.

Speaker 1 (40:43):
I think.

Speaker 3 (40:43):
So we have written wrong fire and.

Speaker 4 (40:57):
Bryan Powler rock, I couldn't tinderstand they want to hire
me and then they go yahoo it up.

Speaker 2 (41:11):
You gotta yahoo it up whatever else. He says.

Speaker 5 (41:14):
He's absolutely correct about that. You do have to yahoo
it up. Falling is the opposite of standing right. I
had to jump.

Speaker 15 (41:25):
In.

Speaker 2 (41:26):
Yeah, Falling is the opposite of standing.

Speaker 9 (41:30):
Right.

Speaker 5 (41:32):
Yes, One Direction is the other joke too. His tribute
band in Argentina was called One Direction. But it is
sad man. I mean, if you if you've got that
level of fame and then everybody will invariably go their
separate ways. It's true of any one of these boy bands, right,
even the while the band is still together. You got
a couple of the guys who are clearly the big

(41:54):
breakout dudes. And I don't know anything about One Direction,
So I don't know if when they were together there
were a couple if Harry Styles was the one that
people recognize was gonna be the Justin Timberlake of that band.
It seemed like the guys who came out of that band,
two or three of them had really successful solo careers.

(42:18):
This guy didn't know anything about him, but it sounds
like maybe things weren't going so.

Speaker 2 (42:23):
Well for him.

Speaker 5 (42:25):
And if you're an addict, you know that that just
puts everything into a different perspective too. That's terrible. You're arguing,
you're in court, you're you know, you're in a hotel
room getting high. I mean, that's like such a fun
thing to do. It's a bummer that they're.

Speaker 2 (42:45):
Getting high in a hotel room.

Speaker 5 (42:46):
Yeah, it's one of the best places to get high.
I don't know that I've ever gotten high in a
hotel room. Like, I either want to be at home
or out. I don't think i'd want to be in
a hotel room. A trip on a trip, trip on
a trip. Yeah, if you listen to us on iHeartRadio, you.

Speaker 2 (43:08):
Can tell me where you do that.

Speaker 5 (43:09):
You can always leave messages for us as well, voicemails.
A lot of people would just prefer to leave those
on the after hours line. It's always there. It's two
one sex nine eight sex eighty nine three.

Speaker 1 (43:21):
Mister Crinkle here listening.

Speaker 15 (43:24):
To the podcast from a couple of days ago, and
I just want to just want to clear something up
that I've ignored for.

Speaker 10 (43:28):
A long time. But I figured, I just know call
in about it.

Speaker 5 (43:33):
Uh.

Speaker 10 (43:34):
Foot pounds is the unit of torque, not pressure.

Speaker 1 (43:38):
You're always saying foot pounds of pressure.

Speaker 10 (43:41):
And uh, like I said, I've just ignored it.

Speaker 4 (43:43):
And you know, I know you.

Speaker 1 (43:45):
Value accuracy and clarity and the word economy and all
that good stuff.

Speaker 4 (43:50):
So just started calling it. So I'll give you a
second to do that.

Speaker 10 (43:54):
The nerds are calling it.

Speaker 5 (43:56):
Go ahead, okay, bye, No, listen, I always value accuracy. Unfortunately,
you are wrong. Foot pound is pressure. You're thinking of
the pound foot. Now I'm happy for you that you
don't have to stay quiet any longer, but you did
mix them up. Pound foot is your torque measurement. My
dad was a mechanical engineer for fifty years. He taught

(44:20):
college courses like statics and dynamics and gravitational systems, and
so I grew up here in the company he worked for.
One of the things they made were torque converters for vehicles,
and so I heard all That's all I ever heard
growing up was his stuff. So foot pound you are wrong,
mister Crinkle. I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 (44:40):
The pound foot is what you were thinking of.

Speaker 5 (44:42):
Now you can, if you're really smart, and I'm not,
you can convert one to the other. That is some
very complicated math that engineers will understand. But at least
you get that off your chest. You are incorrect, But
I always appreciate the devotion to accurate, so I always
encourage people to tell me. Now I don't have to

(45:04):
tell them because, as we all know, when we screw up,
people can't wait to tell.

Speaker 7 (45:09):
They tell us.

Speaker 5 (45:10):
But that's fair because we're speaking extemporaneously. But you are
thinking of the pound foot torque equals fource times radius.
You are you remember talking out the cuff. You can
do all your extemporaneous things.

Speaker 6 (45:22):
Yeah, it's just too bad, Lincock show, something like this
comes along.

Speaker 2 (45:28):
It's never too late to ruin your day.

Speaker 5 (45:30):
Totally. Seven wm M A s disturb No Stranger to

(45:56):
Do in covers. I think there's one on every one
of their albums, and it's a song they like. And
they did Tears for Fears shout on the sickness towards
the end of the album They've done. What else have
they done? They did well Sound of Silence. That's the
one that really blew up this last year was their
cover of Sound of Silence. But they did Land of

(46:17):
Confusion by Genesis. They did I Still Haven't Found what
I'm looking For by U two. I don't know if
that was like a fan club B side or something.
They did a sting song on one of their albums.
They did Live in After Midnight by Judas Priest. So
Disturbed likes to have their fun with other people's songs

(46:38):
from time to time. But that very first album of theirs,
which means they'll be performing it at the Reromo Fijo,
I have to think it's on that album they'll do.
The song was called Shout two thousand Your Cleveland Guardians.
Have you heard? They're back home and they're playing tonight,
and it's a big deal because it's playoff baseball against

(47:01):
the New York Yankors, who are up two to nothing.
But the next three games are here in the friendly Confines,
and so you have to hope that the combination of
the crowd and the fact that these guys really got
to get something.

Speaker 2 (47:15):
Going, they have not looked good.

Speaker 5 (47:17):
Well, they've you've been self inflicted wounds for the most part.

Speaker 2 (47:21):
Yeah, like the bad News Bears.

Speaker 5 (47:22):
Yeah, they got it. They got to get it together,
got calmed down, just played play the way they've been
playing in all season, and I think they'll be all right.

Speaker 2 (47:31):
So we will get out here on four thirty.

Speaker 5 (47:33):
That's when your coverage will begin, and then your first
pitch at Progressive Field five oh eight. If you've brought
your binoculars, point them up and you might see young
Bill Squire in the stands waving to you. If you
see anyone looking at you with binoculars or opera glasses,
oh will you wave?

Speaker 8 (47:51):
All right?

Speaker 5 (47:51):
I see that you don't, you know, in the in
the downtime or whatever. You know, is a lot of
downtime in baseball. You don't scan the crowd out you go, Hey,
is anybody you know? You're not looking for opera glasses?

Speaker 3 (48:05):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (48:06):
All right?

Speaker 5 (48:08):
Just me then, Oh, I'm always scanning the crowd for
somebody with opera glasses, because it's the juxtaposition. I like,
they've got their opera glasses in one hand and they've
got a Sugardale hot dog in the other. And that's
fun to look around little people watching during Championship baseball.

(48:29):
So that's this afternoon on MMS and also in the
iHeartRadio app. Cavaliers are playing some preseason ball, well playing
in air quotes. They lost to the Pistons last night.
They will play in Chicago tomorrow night. The final preseason
game of the season is tomorrow night at the United
Center Cavs Bulls eight o'clock tip off here on MMS.

(48:56):
And I was looking at Donovan Mitchell is in a
ca Yim Kardashians Skim's ad campaign.

Speaker 2 (49:03):
Have you seen that?

Speaker 5 (49:04):
I've not seen that, but I'm gonna skims probably revealing,
m I mean, not as revealing as you know when
they ad ad campaigns for the female things. But the
Donovan Mitchell in the oh that one, I did see that. Yeah,
they're skin they're just boxers. But you know they have
to pack their junk too.

Speaker 2 (49:23):
They have to make it.

Speaker 5 (49:24):
If you're gonna do an underwear ad, they have to
make everyone. And I don't know what he's packing. I'll
give him the benefit of the doubt, but if you're
gonna do an underwear ad, they always make it look
like you got to pull on Monster Hog down there,
Riddler cod piece. Yes, you've got to make That's how
you sell underwear because it's completely mundane when you're selling

(49:49):
you know, female skims or whatever the hook there is.

Speaker 2 (49:53):
Oh, this will really suck you in.

Speaker 5 (49:56):
Guys, the only thing you care about is is it
gonna make can my junk look good? And so that's
why all of these, you know, there's this wave of
men's underwear companies making these things, all different kinds. You
see them on social media, You'll see ad campaigns online,
and they're all focused around one thing.

Speaker 2 (50:18):
How does it make your junk look? Doesn't matter?

Speaker 5 (50:22):
You know, if you work in your glutes NonStop, you'll
never see a guy's underwear ad from behind, always from
the front.

Speaker 2 (50:31):
Donovan Mitchell in a Skim's ad campaign.

Speaker 5 (50:36):
For Skims, of course, as the Kim Kardashian underwear line
and her ad campaigns with women have been like ice,
Spice and Brookshields and of course Kim herself. I think
her sisters have done them. But you know these are
smart because what do they always say? Hey, man, on
and off the court, I need to be comfortable, and so.

Speaker 2 (51:03):
God, Kim Kardashian's hot I'm sorry.

Speaker 5 (51:08):
I know that she has created her face too, and
she's you know, because we all create our bodies, but
good grief, she's just foxy. Is it week seven already?
Thefl do you want to do? Whoopsis?

Speaker 2 (51:24):
Let's do it week seven?

Speaker 1 (51:27):
Week?

Speaker 5 (51:28):
The season's half over right practically? And then almost okay, yeah, yeah,

(51:53):
all right. So Bill's dog, Whoopsie has been picking the
teams for us. He gets out as miniature football helmets,
and she does five games every week, including the Browns
game right, and he lays out a treat in front
of each one of these tiny footballs. And it's as
simple as whichever treat she eats first, that's her pick exactly. Okay,

(52:14):
and this is week seven, five more games. She is
currently fifteen to fifteen. That's pretty good for a dog.
That's good for a dog, it's good for anybody. Here
we go, it's week seven. She got one game right
last week, and she is throwing a flag on everybody
getting upset about her style of just going to one side.

(52:38):
So that's Broncos Saints she goes for. Okay, this is
Patriots Jaguar. Yeah r.

Speaker 2 (52:48):
She goes for Jacksonville.

Speaker 5 (52:50):
Super Bowl rematch Okay, come.

Speaker 2 (52:52):
On, chieves forty nine ers?

Speaker 5 (52:54):
Is this one wakes forty nine ers? Sunday night game?
Chet steel Let's go Steelers over the just lose says
and Brown's bangles. Let's go come on.

Speaker 2 (53:15):
Over the Browns.

Speaker 5 (53:19):
Lock them in. That's not always the case there. You're
trying to get that hat off of her head. Referee
cost Well, nobody would want to be in that for
too long.

Speaker 2 (53:29):
Okay, we'll go today.

Speaker 5 (53:30):
She's good. So Week seven picks are posted on my
Instagram now too, if you want to review them and
do a parlay or bet against her or whatever. Do
we know if we've gotten anecdotal evidence or hearsay at
least as some people are betting exactly how she picks them.
But has anybody one big from that if we heard

(53:51):
about anybody who bet a parlay like that, well, I mean,
you have to do you have to get all five right.
And she's the best she's done is in one week.
She's done gone far and won twice. But she hasn't
had a perfect reach. She hasn't gone five for five years,
has not gone five for five Okay, and I don't
think this is the weekstate Probably not, but she picks

(54:11):
Cleveland over Cincinnati, and that's something, all right. Thank you
to whoever sent me the photo of somebody who hacked
a highway road sign. I think this is in Colombia
Station on Boone Road. We used to spend a little
bit of time. We had friends that lived out in
Columbia Station, so I think I think Boone Road is
a long road, but I know part of it is

(54:32):
out there in Columbia Station. But the photo is great
of this is very early in the morning because it's dark.
But somebody hacked in one of these road signs on
the highway warning oiled up men ahead, this one down
here says sexy men cause accident. And then lastly, Peepee
pooh pooh sixty nine twenty. So you might not be

(54:56):
the hero we need, but you are the hero we deserve.
Pepe pooh pooh six nine four twenty. Some absolute unit
hacked into this road sign out there, not only warning
people of oiled up men and sexy men cause accident,

(55:17):
but Pepe pooh pooh sixty for twenty. So thank you
who's whoever sent me that, because I obviously would not
have seen that out in the wild. We were mentioning
yesterday about the guy on the beach who got full
on kicked in the nards in his speedo by one

(55:39):
of these wild horses.

Speaker 2 (55:40):
This is an island near.

Speaker 5 (55:44):
In Baltimore, and they have horses that live on this island,
and people will go and it's a it's a public beach,
but they tell people there are signs everywhere, Hey, don't
mess with the wild horses. Variably there's somebody who will
ignore that. That was this guy, older dude in a
speedo full on kicked in the nuts. And I was

(56:07):
reading another horse story about how or is it now
they have dead horses and they're not going to blow
them up. And I guess there's a chart too for
people who are for municipalities that have dead animals and

(56:30):
have to blow them up. Let me find this here,
because it was I just had it, Oh, the Forest
Service that they won't blow up horses, And I guess
there's a chart that is legitimately used to determine how
they can obliterate horse carcasses with explosives. This is a

(56:53):
chart used by the US Forestry Service. And they said that. Now,
first of all, I had no idea that blowing up
dead horses is a thing. I think we've probably all
seen that video of that town that wanted to blow
up that beached whale and it just rained blubber into
everyone's car in the parking lot.

Speaker 2 (57:11):
And I think that might have been in Portland or
something forty years ago.

Speaker 5 (57:15):
But the Forest Service blows up horse carcasses, but they're
not currently doing it because of the fire danger. They
said that when a horse dies in the back country,
we're talking about mountainous area that a lot of times,
they say the best option they have is to blow
it to smithereens so it doesn't attract grizzly bears. And

(57:35):
my thought is, well, wouldn't you attract more bears by
dispersing horse parts throughout a wider area? But then they
might just I don't know if it's that misty. I
don't think it's a pink mist I'll assume that the
Forestry Service knows what they're doing.

Speaker 2 (57:54):
I didn't even know this was a thing until yesterday.
But they say, and it.

Speaker 5 (57:59):
Might just cause them to cover a larger territory rather
than congregating one spot in Yeah, just go and eat
that carcass us. Forestry Service has a how to guide
called obliterating animal carcasses with explosives.

Speaker 2 (58:13):
If you're watching the live stream, I will show it
here to you. It really does.

Speaker 5 (58:18):
There's a figure one partial obliteration. That's when they just
strap a little bit of a dynamite to the body
and the legs, and then of course complete obliteration is
when they cover the entire animal there with dynamite and
proceed to blow it up. But they're not doing that
because it's so hot and dry. This is specifically a
part of Wyoming, and horses will slip and they'll fall

(58:43):
in to their deaths, you know, and a horse is
not an animal that you can put in a cast,
so even like when a horse breaks its leg, so
they got to go full on anton sugar on it.
And they're worried now though that these blasts woulden night wildfires,
and so they can't do it up there. We have
a hand full of bureau chieves who listen to the show.
They're in Wyoming and they are probably fully hip to this,

(59:07):
but I'd never heard of it, and so they're like,
what compounds this is? This is the time of year
where grizzlies are in full on eating everything. They can
because they're getting ready to hibernate, so the bears. So
they're like, we can't just leave horse carcasses around. But

(59:27):
I would love to see one of these exploded. I
would love to see there's got to be video online
of this of the Forestry Service obliterating a horse carcass,
because it would be super gory, right, But they've got
their handbook. They have to put three pounds of explosives
under the main parts of the carcass. They got to

(59:49):
do it under the hind quarters, the midsection. This is
all laid out, and then they have to put a
pound of explosives under each leg and then they tradition
only will blow it up. I feel like this was
just somebody that had a lot of dynamite and they're like, no,
this is how you're to horse Yeah, like this is
how we like, there's no need to do it this way.

Speaker 1 (01:00:10):
But.

Speaker 2 (01:00:12):
That's how that's how they do it.

Speaker 5 (01:00:14):
And if you're in the middle of Wyoming, it's not
like you're you know, that's a sparsely populated state to
begin with, so it's something worry about people being around you.
I keep the people say from them bears, Yeah, yeah,
can you think about a better way to keep people, say,
from bears, than to horses.

Speaker 2 (01:00:29):
I can't know.

Speaker 5 (01:00:30):
Nope, beware of exploding horses. You've we've all been camping
and seen that sign. So people in the US Forces
Service say that it is not for the feint of heart.
There's a lot of bone chips that go into the air,
And I honestly wouldn't mind this. If this is how
my body was dealt with, I have an explosives trap

(01:00:53):
to it. I wouldn't mind that either. I mean, I've
said that I like to team it up with somebody
for a gender reveal full of pink dust.

Speaker 2 (01:01:01):
I I would like to think.

Speaker 5 (01:01:04):
You know, the technology with respect to euthanasia is advancing
to the point where it's gonna become there's gonna be
less and less and less of.

Speaker 2 (01:01:14):
A stigma about it.

Speaker 5 (01:01:16):
There are more companies that let people kind of take
control of, you know, if you're gonna be cremated, what
they're gonna do with or whatever. So by the time
fingers crossed down the road that we would die under
normal conditions, maybe enough time will have gone by where
this is an option to us. Because my plan has

(01:01:36):
always been to be cremated and to have the bulk
of my cremaines packed into a Roman candle and then
shot off a barge over Lake, Michigan.

Speaker 2 (01:01:46):
That's always been my thought.

Speaker 5 (01:01:48):
But we're gonna have so many more cool options, you know,
for people who want to be buried, that's all there is.
You get put in the box. The box gets put
in the ground. And for most people that's a religious thing,
you know. I grew up Catholics, so there's nobody in
my family that gets cremated. My siblings and I, I
think uniformly want to be cremated. I have no use

(01:02:11):
for getting my body planted in the ground in a
box to where it can whatever.

Speaker 2 (01:02:15):
But that's what my mom and dad. You don't want
to do.

Speaker 5 (01:02:19):
My dad's buried, my grandparents are buried, all in the
same cemetery. But I think people like us, we like
a little bit of showbiz. We've devoted our lives to
this god forsake and industry of trying to keep people entertained,
sometimes with diminishing results.

Speaker 2 (01:02:37):
Why not go out in one last literal blaze of glory.

Speaker 8 (01:02:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:02:41):
I'm also on record has been wanting to be turned
into a tree. I like that, like the tree. That's
a nice one too, but it's not very bombastic, not
very bombastic. That's why hearing what the horse explosions has
got me rethinking something.

Speaker 2 (01:02:57):
There's time to reassess.

Speaker 5 (01:03:01):
Some things are.

Speaker 9 (01:03:02):
Never meant to be discussed in Polite Society. Welcome to
im Polite Society car Show on seven WMMS.

Speaker 2 (01:03:24):
Three.

Speaker 5 (01:03:25):
I want to send me a text will I have
What'll I have for you next week on the show.
We're here Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday next week. Collective Soul they
are coming through next month to do that thirtieth anniversary tour.
If you dig Collective Soul, of those tickets for you.
Comedian Brian Reagan one of the best. He's doing an

(01:03:49):
end of April at Akron Civic Theater, so we got
some time on that one WMMS in two hours to
midnight our metal show. Another big show coming through at
the Agora, band called Imminence.

Speaker 2 (01:04:00):
They are great.

Speaker 5 (01:04:03):
With Landmarks and Jeluka, which is like this Japanese avant
garde metal band.

Speaker 2 (01:04:08):
They're wild.

Speaker 5 (01:04:09):
That show is at the Agora in March. The Great
King Diamond is just a few weeks away at the Agora.
I will have those tickets for you. I will see
you at that show, Love King Diamond, and then Warrant
if you're more into the eighties stuff. Warrant is playing
MGM Northfield Park in a few weeks too, So a

(01:04:30):
lot of good shows coming through, a lot of chances
for you to grab tickets for them next week.

Speaker 2 (01:04:35):
Hey, Terry, Hello, what's up?

Speaker 1 (01:04:41):
Listen? I was listening to you.

Speaker 13 (01:04:42):
I can totally agree.

Speaker 10 (01:04:44):
I was raised Catholic, and but.

Speaker 13 (01:04:47):
I don't want to be buried and I don't want
to be burned. So I've been looking into getting myself
cryogenically frozen, and I want to be launched into space
and a transparent capsule.

Speaker 5 (01:04:59):
There's a lot to unpacked there, Terry. As the saying goes,
so you don't want your body to be burned. You
want to be You want it to be like Spock.
You want to be spocked into space.

Speaker 2 (01:05:10):
Like Walt Disney.

Speaker 13 (01:05:11):
Before I die, I want to be cryogenically frozen and
launched into space. So maybe some advanced civilization could discover
me and then cure what was what killed me.

Speaker 12 (01:05:23):
I see.

Speaker 5 (01:05:23):
Oh okay, So that was the other part of my question,
because usually when people say they want to be cryogenically frozen.
It's in the hope that down the road they can
be revived. I don't know, though, Terry, that there's any
evidence thus far that that's viable. I guess the thought
is down the road the technology might be viable, Is
that right?

Speaker 2 (01:05:43):
I mean, you're kind of for people who.

Speaker 13 (01:05:45):
Are for me, is available right now to be cryogenically
frozen done to him?

Speaker 2 (01:05:52):
But I know that one.

Speaker 5 (01:05:53):
I thought the Walt Disney thing, by the way, was
an urban legend, right like Ted William today.

Speaker 2 (01:05:59):
Yeah, Ted Way is the baseball player too.

Speaker 5 (01:06:01):
In order to preserve your brain, it's not it's there's
no technology to reanimate, but you can freeze a brain
and we will preserve it.

Speaker 8 (01:06:09):
Yeah.

Speaker 13 (01:06:09):
Yeah, of course there's the technology to launch me into space,
although it's pretty expensive.

Speaker 2 (01:06:14):
It's about fourteen thousand dollars a pound. Was gonna you
just do the head, Yeah, that's Terry. I was gonna
say it all sounds very cost prohibit only one and
seventy pounds.

Speaker 5 (01:06:23):
Yeah, but also like you're spending a lot of money
on when you're dead. So I'm perfectly fine with being
cremated and uh and and you know, some of my
cremines given to whoever wants them yours. That's a that's
a very uh, that's a very complicated plan.

Speaker 2 (01:06:45):
It's your body and your money. You should do what
you want to with it.

Speaker 13 (01:06:48):
But right now, I don't have as much money as
I need. Yeah, yeah, I've got six thousand dollars saved up.
I'm gonna need about six hundred thousand. This is literally
a moon shot idea for Terry. Terry, I assume you
don't have children, goals.

Speaker 2 (01:07:03):
I have one grown child. She's twenty four.

Speaker 5 (01:07:06):
Yeah, okay, have you have you consulted her on this
at all? What are her thoughts on this? She thinks
I'm a crazy boomer, but you're not a man have
a dream?

Speaker 2 (01:07:19):
Yeah, let him do what he wants to do.

Speaker 5 (01:07:21):
She's mad that you're going to be spending the money
that she would get on launching yourself into space. All right, listen,
as you get further down that path, Terry, make sure
you keep us abreast. All right. You might be giving will,
You might be giving hoped every person who has been
afraid to speak up, even though they have the exact
same dream you do. Do that machinist diet. You get

(01:07:43):
down to one hundred and twenty pounds. Save yourself some
money there, that's right. It's in your best interest now
to keep yourself slim and keep the It's just an apple,
a can of tuna, and a couple of almonds a day, Terry,
and you're.

Speaker 2 (01:07:57):
Gonna be on your way. I drink I drink beers
a day.

Speaker 5 (01:08:00):
So all right, well, let's you know, we'll figure that out, right, Boy,
Terry's got a lot of rules for a guy who's
gonna shoot his body into space and hope to be
scooped up by an advanced civilization.

Speaker 2 (01:08:14):
All right, thank you, Terry.

Speaker 5 (01:08:15):
This Terry cryogenically frozen, put into a transparent capsule. That's
another qualifier he had. You then want some chrome pill
floating around out there in the nothingness. And you know,
obviously people know this. The universe is vast. The universe

(01:08:37):
is seemingly infinite, infinite to the degree obviously it ends somewhere,
but I mean infinite to the degree that we cannot
conceive of it.

Speaker 2 (01:08:46):
I was reading this thing the other day.

Speaker 5 (01:08:47):
They said, you know, people are always trying to put
into perspective just how large the universe is, and it
goes beyond anything that we can imagine. I was reading
a thing the other day where the guy, one of
these guys studies this. He goes, the universe is even
bigger than we think, or you know, He's like, they
often use the thought the grain of sand, think of

(01:09:10):
the grains of sand on the earth, and we've often
thought maybe it's one to one with planets or structures
or things in the universe. He said, it's more like
a billion to one for each grain of sand. Now again,
there's they're just taking data and extrapolating it. There's no
way that he could he could know that. But people

(01:09:30):
who study these things, so Terry could conceivably be floating
out there cryogenically frozen. I don't know how you'd keep
him frozen for hundreds of year or whatever. But it's
a dream, and you got to have a dream. I
can't give myself a dream dream No, no, I mean,

(01:09:56):
you know, mine's to be an adult babysitter. And it's
really hard. Wait, babysitting other adults. You're already an adult
baby two year old man to just be like throw
his hat into the babysitting world. Nobody wants me. Uh huh, yeah,
all right, a lot. It's all politics.

Speaker 11 (01:10:14):
Man.

Speaker 5 (01:10:16):
Wait a second, So you're a forty two year old
man who wants to watch my kid. I could see
where that would be difficult for a good job. Yeah,
you just got to get good buzz going for it.
It's hard. It's hard to break in because it's it's
so umbiliated by teenage girls. Yes, yeah, and uh, and

(01:10:37):
you have to fight. You have to fight the dama kids.

Speaker 1 (01:10:40):
Yep.

Speaker 5 (01:10:40):
You gotta fight the stigma. You gotta fight stereotypes. You
can tell people, Hey, if this clarifies things for you,
I don't have to put a no candy sign on
my door at Halloween. I'm not registered as any kind
of offender. So yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:11:00):
But there's also not a lot of money in it either.
So it's kind.

Speaker 5 (01:11:06):
That's about doing what you love, which is watching other
people's kids, watching small children. You haven't had any now,
all I want to do is watch other people's kids
when their parents aren't around. I don't.

Speaker 2 (01:11:19):
Why is this such a difficult dream to fulfill?

Speaker 8 (01:11:23):
Now?

Speaker 5 (01:11:23):
Have you done the Have you done the classic tried
and true flyer method with the little strips at the bottom, right,
You put them on utility poles, put a picture me.

Speaker 2 (01:11:36):
I hope the clean shaven one with the ball cut.

Speaker 5 (01:11:38):
No, it's the one that I just posted on my
Instagram story where I'm wearing Joe Briggs's glasses.

Speaker 2 (01:11:46):
Is that to make you look more studious and trustworthy?

Speaker 5 (01:11:48):
Exactly? It may have backfired. Is this the face of
a guy that you'd have to worry about being alone
with your children?

Speaker 2 (01:11:56):
And the answer is on equivocally No.

Speaker 8 (01:11:59):
Hey, j.

Speaker 5 (01:12:02):
I don't want to be bad.

Speaker 14 (01:12:03):
I don't want to have been bad.

Speaker 15 (01:12:05):
That's pretty ruthless.

Speaker 10 (01:12:07):
First second, I had, dude, I love it.

Speaker 2 (01:12:09):
Yeah, Okay, what's going on, Jason, I'm.

Speaker 15 (01:12:13):
Going to change the subject now, Yeah, going forward, I'm
just calling, you know, usually podcast listeners calling to hash
it up with you.

Speaker 5 (01:12:23):
I feel like you're so.

Speaker 15 (01:12:24):
Quick as a music listener to just dismiss really, any popular.

Speaker 10 (01:12:29):
Music has just as you. You're just saying, they move
chords around, it's the.

Speaker 15 (01:12:34):
Same whatever, Like have you heard Western Night's popular music
or any music And there's only seven notes.

Speaker 10 (01:12:41):
There's only so many variations the chord patterns.

Speaker 15 (01:12:44):
That are actually drived, and you know the dietotic scale
and all that.

Speaker 5 (01:12:48):
So yes, Jason, what do you what is this are
you a Nickelback fan that got mad because I said
they're fine, But I mean, they're not reinventing the wheel.

Speaker 15 (01:12:56):
I mean, I'm you know, specifically, you're talking about fall
Off Boy and how overproduced they are and how it
couldn't be replicated.

Speaker 12 (01:13:03):
During a live act.

Speaker 10 (01:13:04):
When really most of what you're hearing is not I don't.

Speaker 2 (01:13:06):
Think overproduction, but actually just harmonies.

Speaker 10 (01:13:09):
That they're singing. And then I hate to stick up.

Speaker 2 (01:13:11):
For Falling Boy or even Mary.

Speaker 5 (01:13:12):
I don't know if that's what you're doing.

Speaker 2 (01:13:14):
Jason, you're full on doing that, so you don't hate
to do it. You want to do it. You're the
power Christ compels you.

Speaker 5 (01:13:20):
To do it.

Speaker 15 (01:13:22):
They couldn't catch it Cole in Chicago or whatever. Like hey,
like everyone loved him except for the mighty Allen.

Speaker 2 (01:13:29):
That's not what I'm saying.

Speaker 5 (01:13:30):
I'm saying when they were a local band, nobody wanted
anything to do with them.

Speaker 2 (01:13:34):
I'm happy for them. I don't begrudge anyone their success.
I'm not talking.

Speaker 5 (01:13:38):
I'm not telling nobody cares.

Speaker 2 (01:13:39):
It's not true. There are plenty of local bands that
get huge in their hometown. I'm going that's what.

Speaker 15 (01:13:46):
The distinction is SPEs as a musician. You know, you
bought a drum set fifty years ago and haven't played it.
You talk like you're a drummer. You use the term polyood.

Speaker 2 (01:13:56):
Jason, I don't know, okay, I don't know what your
complaint is.

Speaker 5 (01:14:02):
I'm just calling about that.

Speaker 1 (01:14:03):
Man, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:14:04):
Okay, thank you. There's Jason in North Royalton.

Speaker 5 (01:14:06):
I mean, if if you're complaining about something, yes, I'm
a drummer, I don't I don't know what that has
to do with anything. People get so upset when you
say you don't like a band that they like. It's
I'm just saying I don't like them. Yeah, I hate
the support. What are you talking about?

Speaker 2 (01:14:23):
I don't know.

Speaker 5 (01:14:25):
I guess he was just calling. He said, I'm calling
to mess with you, which is not that's a poorly
formed thing. But Jimmy, hello, did thank you? Jimmy, Hey,
how are you?

Speaker 2 (01:14:35):
What's going on?

Speaker 8 (01:14:36):
Not much going into the evening?

Speaker 10 (01:14:39):
Yeah, No, I just wanted to.

Speaker 8 (01:14:40):
I was listening and I thought i'd call in about
you were talking about putting your ashes in a room
and candle, yeah, and I was thinking of I was
talking to my friends the other day we were laughing
and we were talking about that. What would we do
with our ashes if we did do that? And I said,
I somebody mix it in right and growing psilocybin mushrooms.

Speaker 5 (01:15:04):
I thought would be unique. Anybody you could trip, someone
could trip on you.

Speaker 8 (01:15:12):
Yeah, yeah, tell you like how high thing or they
put it in the soil, but they put it in
like the rymix and yeah, actually let the spores grow.

Speaker 5 (01:15:20):
I think it would be unique.

Speaker 2 (01:15:23):
This is the beauty of it, you know, to find
out different ways to to your own remains. Right, Yeah, okay,
thank you, Jimmy, appreciate it.

Speaker 5 (01:15:32):
I got some sabin and gummies. Alan freezing expands and
obliterates cells. So without fixing us on a cellular level,
it's impossible to do what people are talking about doing. Yeah,
I'm no scientists, but I mean it doesn't seem long
term viable. Yeah, you're gonna get brain of the freezer,

(01:15:53):
burn of the brain.

Speaker 2 (01:15:54):
And down here.

Speaker 5 (01:15:55):
The people who have done it, because there are places
that do this, they are at the mercy of let's
hope there's no power.

Speaker 2 (01:16:02):
Outages or you know, anything like that.

Speaker 5 (01:16:04):
You know, if you're at a facility where there's tubes
with bodies and then they're plugged in. They've had this
problem at at cryo facilities before. But right the power
goes out. Next, much more logical way to it is
to download your brain and then upload it into some
sort of cyborg or cloud or something like that. Right,

(01:16:28):
if we're talking, if you're talking about that kind of stuff,
do you want a Brian before we get out of here?

Speaker 2 (01:16:37):
Because I have a.

Speaker 5 (01:16:39):
Good way to close the show.

Speaker 2 (01:16:41):
I have a Brian.

Speaker 5 (01:16:42):
Let me put it back together because I have moved it.
I had it set up earlier, and I'll play what
he has done here. And now I know again this
is one of these ones that I know very very
well because I grew up listening to it. But it
might not be something that everybody can zero in on.

Speaker 7 (01:17:01):
When well, aries me, when can I touch you? When strong?

Speaker 5 (01:17:14):
Right it to the untrained ear will be a lot
of standard issue singer songwritery stuff very much from the seventies,
and it is at is Barry Manilow that he's singing.
Oh and I know that because my mom was a
huge Barry Maniloe fan. So those were songs I heard

(01:17:35):
when I was a kid all the time. My very
first concert my mom took me to see was Barry
Manilow when I was like seven years old, and so
I immediately recognize this song is called Weekend in New England.
Now why he's listening to it or singing it, I
don't know. Random Brian's always on shuffle.

Speaker 7 (01:17:54):
When well aries me way, can I touch you? One
the strong?

Speaker 10 (01:18:16):
Have heard some Barry?

Speaker 3 (01:18:18):
Yeah?

Speaker 5 (01:18:20):
Oh my mom love that stuff. Boy, she couldn't get
enough of I assume his full name is Baron's Mane Loo.
I believe it's Barreld Barld Manel. Yeah, oh a hell
of a performer. He's still alive. Barldar Berrold and Darreld

(01:18:42):
Manilow Chevitz was probably his full name. You can see.

Speaker 2 (01:18:52):
That's what he says.

Speaker 5 (01:18:53):
That's what he says.

Speaker 2 (01:18:56):
Alan, haven't you.

Speaker 5 (01:18:57):
Seen Austin Powers or demolition Man freezing your boy? But
he absolutely definitely works. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:19:03):
I don't want to be thought out and then have
to figure out.

Speaker 5 (01:19:06):
The Three Pebbles Seashells. I don't want to be thought
out and have to figure out the three seashells. And
now I must leave you as the Brady bunches on
and I find four of those children incredibly arousing. Get
at it.

Speaker 11 (01:19:22):
Be careful of what you say, Be careful in every way,
Be careful of what you do. Big Brother is watching you.
Be circumspect and discreet, Stay light on your mental feet.

(01:19:42):
One slip and you know who you're through. Big Brother
is watching you. And with all narratives, remember obedience, pain.

Speaker 4 (01:19:55):
And when you watch that.

Speaker 11 (01:19:58):
TV screen, remember it works both ways. You'll disappear in
a wink. Unless you can double think, you'll vanish into
the blue. Big Brother is watching you.