November 27, 2024 • 20 mins
Petros Papadakis joins Dave Softy Mahler to talk about travelling on Thanksgiving for a broadcast, a Greek food menu, then Hugh joins the guys to laugh and tell some stories.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's time for our weekly conversation with college football analyst
Petros Papadikas.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Not that I'm a smart guy, I'm stupid.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Brought to you by Sweet James Accident Attorneys forty. If
you're hurt in an accident, called Sweet James right away
at eight hundred, five hundred and fifty two hundred. Sweet
James will be sweet to you, but tough on insurance
companies that will bully you.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
Rue but I don't know bo.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Now with Petros, Peer's Dave's Softy Muller.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Lighty boys and girls.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Here we go on a Wednesday after ned right here
on ninety three to three KJR FM, Softy Dick Jackson.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Dick is out here in for Dick. Yes, it's true
this man has no tick, but it's our pleasure, our pleasure.
He's not here. Yes, it's true this man has no tick.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
They got a second. I gotta do the old intro
thing here. He is the king of sports talk radio
in southern California, Father of the year, husband of the day,
friend of the month, one of the all times great
Greek American athletes of all time.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
Our friend that Trus Papa Doukas. Courtesy of.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
No One and only Sweet James Bergner, the dense beard
of justice, who can come through for you if you've
ever been hurt in a car accident, motorcycle accident, if
a dog has ever bitten your balls.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Sweet James knows the ancient secrets.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
In which to come through for you. If you've ever
had one of these things before, you give him a
call at eight hundred and nine million. That's eight hundred
nine million, or sweet.
Speaker 3 (01:43):
James dot com. How are you bal? I got it? Well,
you really want to know?
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Yes, yes, yes, yes, I mean I hate when people say,
how are you?
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Is it the fungus is the fungus back the rash?
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Well, I did grow up with exzema, and that's not kind.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
Oh Jesus.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
I'm sorry, Jesus, because I'm I've have a lot of
crippling anxiety.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
I don't know if you've ever pen some of your
listeners deal with that. I'm show over what what's going on?
Talk to me. They're making me travel and it's hard
for me, as you know. So I'm going to Michigan
State on a red eye tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Oh Jesus, tomorrow night. Copy's terrible. Well, it is why
I had a whiskey. I forgot I was going to
do the show, so we had an early show. Yeah,
so I got done early. So this is live, folks,
and always of course. And I had an early show
(02:47):
and I had to tape some of it because I
had a meeting with Greg Chiano because that's who's playing
Michigan State Rutgers. And after the meeting, I forgot about
this show, and I had a drink and then it
was like, hey, give us a call.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
So yeah, but anyway, Petross feel a little jolly here
on a Wednesday afternoon, More like crippled with anxiety going
into a tony degree game with a red eye and
a weird connection on.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
The way home. You know what, you got to get
over a pell? You really do? You know that's not
a nice way to speak to somebody with anxiety.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
I don't care.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
You want to be like Madden and take a.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Bus kinda No, I want to be like me and
live here and never go anywhere. Well, I mean, honestly,
let me ask you a question. If this is such
a problem for you, why do you do it?
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Great question? I just say I can't do it. Well.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Look, when a football coach calls my number. When Jonathan
Smith says I need to see you.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
Shut up. You know I'm voter the weird kind of shoulders.
Oh dude, it's the word.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
I love him, Jonathan, What are you doing? Relax?
Speaker 3 (04:05):
He's the best.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Is a twitch come out? When Jonathan Smith says we
want to beat in person? Right, forget that whole Thursday
thanksgivving with your family. Well you're telling me you hear Friday. Okay,
Jonathan Smith calls you up.
Speaker 3 (04:19):
No, no, I go, I go. He calls you up,
and the red eye I went on. I'm meetingsday. Shut up.
You tell him I got anxiety all eligible. Okay, you
know what, I'm gonna have a few beafs on the roster.
They they sir, Let me show you. They have Aiden Chiles.
That's right, defensive end right right right?
Speaker 2 (04:39):
No, the quarterback, the corr who is the defensive end
from Oregon State they.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Had last year.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Well, don't forget Jack Velling, Husky shut down the tight
end Jack Velling.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Sorry remember him? Not really, I.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Don't remember much of that game a year ago. By
the way, that game a year ago was in the
rain driving home, almost got killed in the car on
the way home, Anthony Jones. Who is the who is
the defensive end for them? They're big defensive ends. Cut No, no,
you just made that name up.
Speaker 3 (05:13):
No Swannye. Swannye used to play there back in the day.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
He tipped the ball to win an overtime game against
USC Don't you say Swany's made up?
Speaker 1 (05:22):
For real?
Speaker 2 (05:22):
Who's the guy? Who's the I don't know. I'm sorry,
I gave it up on the board. I threw the board.
Who was the freaking guy?
Speaker 3 (05:28):
All right? What do you want to talk about? Oh?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I Will Chatfield? Andrew Chatfield is the guy. I'm thinking
not on the roster you got you? Maybe leg, but
just say just time out for a second.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
Time out.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
Jonathan Smith calls you and says he didn't call me. Okay, Well, if.
Speaker 3 (05:42):
Michigan State said that we're planning to meet in person.
Speaker 2 (05:45):
And you tell them you can't do it, no, you'd
say it's going to be no, no, no, no.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
I need to make money.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
I work at I work at Fox. Fox says you
get to call most of the games from home. They say,
I have to go. I gotta go hang on a second,
just usually around Thanksgiving, I gotta go Okay, hang on, John,
it's softy. Do you realize that Petros has crippling anxiety
and you're making him fly out?
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Doesn't matter. I'm flying out there anyway. I just said
it to Jonathan. It can't be changed. I just do that.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
I just don't. That's not cool, man, tell them it's
a joke. Well, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I got Chatfield's
not on the edge, you know, I'm I'm looking forward
to it. Actually, my uh my wife's parents were married
or engaged at Michigan State and shortly after she was born,
almost very quickly divorced, but still like to visit the place.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
Is the who's the coach that got fired? What's his name?
The guy that was having phone sex? What's his name?
Mel Tucker? That's your guy, mil Tucker, My guy? What
do you mean, my guy? You're more into that?
Speaker 2 (06:55):
I'm Mel Tucker. I could just see I'm a mouth breather,
but I could see you really mouth breathing.
Speaker 3 (06:59):
Oh really? Oh yeah, you know.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
The wife is listening right now. Literally, Gene is tuning
in right now. She literally just texted me, is this
you getting me back for the making funny?
Speaker 3 (07:10):
Because you have anxiety? Is that? Is that why you're
doing this? Who me?
Speaker 1 (07:13):
No?
Speaker 3 (07:14):
The other guy? Of course you? Why am I trying
to get you back? Look ause you just got mad
at me for making fun of you. Well you shouldn't
have texted the head coach. Well I really didn't.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
It was all theater of the mine kidding sheiano now,
Oh dude, well good luck with that.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
I'm sorry that you have.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Where's Hugh Millan? He went to the bathroom and he's
probably mad at me. I haven't texted him back. I
love Hugh Millan.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
By the way, you know where hu Milan's been you?
What's up man? Where you've been? Just been around? Yeah,
he's around somewhere. You owe Hugh a text? Yeah? Probably.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Well, hey, Jackson, if you can get him back, put
him on. If you can get him back, go ahead.
He said that he wandered away. He told Hugh to
go away. Well, here, wandering away could mean a lot
of things. He may have left the house and walked
down the street for all we know. How much you
want to bet I can throw football over the right.
We could have won staked like you forgot that you
had to do this segment today.
Speaker 3 (08:05):
I did.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
I totally blew the morning one, gonna I'm a mess.
There's a chance and Jackson, I blew my national show
this morning.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
I didn't even show.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Oh with Fox correct. Were they pissed? No, they blamed themselves,
not for relying on you. I guess I can see
that I'm pretty reliable. You are, I Jed Jackson can
confirm this.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
You are.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
Out of all the shows that you and I have done,
hundreds of shows over the last twenty years, I cannot
think of one time where you have and I'm sure
it's happened once, but I cannot think of one time
where you've blown us off. Well, what usually happens is
You'll just call me on the phone and then I'll
be like, oh, god, right, and then we'll do it.
Then well, I uh, there's by the way, I think
we're going to get Huan them good because there's a chance. Yeah,
(08:49):
just like you forgot this segment, there's a chance that
Hugh went to the bathroom and forgot that he had
to come back on we us at four thirty.
Speaker 3 (08:55):
Well, sometimes people got to blow it up. That certainly
could happen.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Hey, uh, what's on the Greek Thanksgiving menu? I'm on
Uh I did some red Eye to Detroit. You that's
not until like eleven o'clock at night. Though we haven't.
We asked this every year, but you we have a
traditional Thanksgiving and they add some Greek stuff.
Speaker 3 (09:14):
Don't you have a nice dinner before your red eye
tomorrow night?
Speaker 2 (09:17):
I guess blow it out on the plane. I'm on, uh,
I like you on the toilet. But we probably will
have why, We'll probably have some domadis, you know. I'm
on the grape leaves. I'm on probably have some spinac.
I'm on kozanas kitchen dot com and I'm looking at
(09:38):
a traditional Greek Thanksgiving meal. Well, how there is no
traditional Greek Thanksgiving Greek salad?
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Do ahead, mashed potatoes, green bean. I mean you didn't drink.
Spank your pita?
Speaker 2 (09:56):
What is that?
Speaker 3 (09:57):
I'm gonna spank your peda?
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Uh, citrus, turkey, spinach and the cheese you with pumpkin?
Whatever the hell that is?
Speaker 3 (10:06):
You want to talk about football? No, talk to Hugh.
He's back. Go ahead?
Speaker 2 (10:09):
What hey Hugh?
Speaker 3 (10:12):
Yes, yes, finally somebody to talk to.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Boys.
Speaker 4 (10:21):
You guys are gold man. I just stay the hell
away from you guys. You just do work your magic
what's happening.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
I owe you a text, Hugh. It's all good, So
let's talk.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
What do you want to tell me?
Speaker 3 (10:32):
The you gave me the gentry? You know? No, I
have to full full disclosure.
Speaker 2 (10:38):
Uh my telephone number and Softy can can Uh if
he's not gone, you can attest to this. Uh My
telephone number is sponsored, so I give it out once
a year on the radio show. And it's been about
twenty years and the number hasn't changed since I was
a teenager. So uh so everybody has my number. I
(11:01):
get about six hundred text a day and sometimes somebody
and the reason I can discern is that somebody's name
is in the phone, but your name is not in his,
Hugh Millan, unfortunately, it's don't answer, no, I made a mistake.
It's in his high milon.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
I don't know. Well, Tim's name high like the guy
from raising Arizona or a yeah, like an old Timy name.
It's in there.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
And uh so sometimes it gets by me through the wickets,
through the catcher and the rise and speak and I apologize,
but I love and respect you and I'm happy to
be speaking.
Speaker 3 (11:36):
Well.
Speaker 4 (11:37):
We got a visit that and a conversation that does
not belong on air, and you know what.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
I'll copy that. Okay, yeah, that's fine. Well I'm down
here and fight the fight, you know, Hugh, Wait a minute,
Wait a minute, your sons of bitches. You can't go
on the air and tease us like that.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
What the hell's going on?
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Hey, sof you never looked through the face mask of
the packed this is my name, Hugh, you know, yeah,
Well guess what I looked through the face mask of
a plastic face mask at Kinko football my junior year.
Speaker 3 (12:07):
So suck it you and I've been through the walls.
Do you know the story when when Dave went to quit?
Speaker 4 (12:16):
So you need to hear this, Dave, tell the story
when you quit football?
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Why?
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Why?
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Why are you doing this? Hey? I quit football at CAL.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
I left Cal in the middle of the night and
Hitchhike told him like an idiot, So don't feel bad.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
I don't feel bad. And I was like a big
recruit for them, and I completely blew it.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Well, I was not a big recruit, although my mom
got me on the Michigan recruiting list somehow. And I'm
getting letters from Bo Schimbeckler, hand signed by bo you've
seen those. Hugh telling me he's been following my career
with great interest, which I knew he was a liar.
You gotta have a guy that puts her hand on
the ground. He was looking for a Jewish long snapper,
(12:54):
and my name came up on their database. But I
went to quit my senior year because a guy transferred
over and took my starting center job, guy named Mike Chamberlain.
That bastard transferred over from Inner Lake. And I'm like,
I'm not gonna go do this and get beat up
and just not to start. I've been waiting for this opportunity.
And so Dwayne Hatch looked at me. I swear to God,
this is true, Petros and said, well, I'll tell you
(13:16):
what Peter. So, yeah, it's Dave coach Steve And I
saw him like ten years later, and he's I swear
I had a Peter Maler. Yeah that was me, of Putts.
I didn't even know who I was, so.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
I felt like that, Yeah I quit.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
Yeah, why you couldn't just kick you over the guard?
Speaker 3 (13:39):
No? No, there was somebody else there at guard?
Speaker 4 (13:41):
No?
Speaker 3 (13:41):
Yeah, what about the other bad news man? Bad news anyway? Yeah,
Well I left callum humiliation. Yeah, well tell us that story.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
I got a nervous breakdown.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
Hey, you're not supposed to laugh at this year. It's twenty.
That's funny as hell.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
There's a book written by a really famous author, like
really high end literature. And the guy's name is Don DeLillo,
and he wrote a book. He wrote a lot of books,
but he wrote some very famous books. But he wrote
a little novella called end Zone, and it's a weird
little book about football. And in it, the player is
(14:23):
like a Penn State white running back who gets obsessed
with like some girl in a dorm and like goes
insane and locks himself in a room and won't come out,
and then ends up transferring to like a small Texas college.
And then the book goes on from there about football,
and then very slowly. It's a short book, maybe one
hundred pages, and I would anybody who's interested in the
(14:44):
weird ethereal kind of bigger meaning of football might want
to read. It's only about a hundred you know. And
then it kind of just slowly morphs into the language
of nuclear war, which is the language, which is the
language of football. It's the Great Iron all of those
things are nuclear war. That's what's them. That's what they
(15:07):
based it out of all of it. Yeah, defense leverage.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
You know, when I.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
Think of a guy going and saying locking himself in
a dorm room, playing football, going nuts over at chick,
I think a nuclear war.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Well that's what it came to at the end of
the book. Got it.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
But but anyway, Yeah, I read that book, and maybe
I read that book a long time ago, and it
helped me understand why.
Speaker 3 (15:26):
Yeah, ask him that question again here he didn't hear that.
I said, what's white got to do with it? I
was like, what what? What?
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Like?
Speaker 3 (15:31):
I was expecting a certain you.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Know what in that time, probably nothing, because at Penn
State you had John Capilletti and stuff like that. Right,
But when I played football, everybody was black, and I
talked like I was black for years.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
Did you really? Yeah? It took me a long time.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
To not wow, you know, when I was talking to
other like football people, like what would you say?
Speaker 3 (15:51):
I'm not doing it?
Speaker 2 (15:52):
But for years and years I used to also speak
Patois because we had a Jamaican nanny, so I kind
of came by it naturally.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
Geez, Okay, Well, you know that I do know that
about it.
Speaker 4 (16:02):
But you know, you remember when Barkley said, Hey, this
is a hell of the times we're living in where
you've got the best rapper is white and the best
golfer is black.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
Yeah, I mean and and uh, I mean when when
Toby Gerhardt was really the guy that I was like, damn,
you know, this is a white running back and he's
worthy of winning the Heisman. And then McCaffrey came and
and now it's you know, it's a different word. Come on, man,
give us a little bit of an example of what
you would say, just as I mean, we got it
(16:36):
says like Barbara Billingsley talking jive in airplane.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
Come on, it's just the way people.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
We've just had five black guys text the show.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
They want to know what you sounded like.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Come on, it is not how people talk anymore anyway.
I don't have auto tune. Okay, fine, all right, well whatever,
come on. That was a good joke, recorded and texted
to me off the ear. I promise I won't play.
We used to listen to screw music. Do you know
what screw music.
Speaker 3 (17:07):
Is like when you're doing it?
Speaker 2 (17:08):
No, screw music like DJ Screw and Michael five thousand watts.
We had a lot of black guys from Texas in
my time.
Speaker 3 (17:15):
You've told that story before.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
You Well, what I'm saying is they were all you know,
And this is not a this is not a hidden secret.
There was a big and still is a big promethesne
codeine drinking problem in Texas. And the rap music was
super slowed down, and then they would slow down the
voice too, because you know, hey, you're on cody, so
(17:37):
it'd be like gropp.
Speaker 3 (17:43):
Like that, and that's that's what I grew up.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
God, no wonder, you can't even get on a dem plane.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
Like that.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
So we used to live like that. You know, That's
that's not how it is. You know now the rappers
wear tight jeans. Oh god, they're for government supremacy. It's
really weird.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
Hey, how real quick, as we're running out of time here,
How badly? What do you guys, Harlan coming on? No,
he's at five? You want to hang around to an
extra segment?
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Not? I mean you're you're already drunk. What the hell's
the difference? I'm not drunk. That would take him a
lot more. How badly are the Husky's going to get
turass kicked on Saturday. And Eugene Well, I think because
of the last three years, not the three years, but
three games, right, the last three games. Don't do the
Jonathan Smith's long gone.
Speaker 3 (18:42):
He's a great coach. You missed him when he left,
Jimmy Lake, we did. Absolutely, He's a great dude.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
I love you missed him when he took that Michigan's
State job. But he could have had what he could have.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
He could have. Would you rather have Jonathan he or
Jed Fick? Well, who would you rather have? That's a
good question. Actually, you'd rather have the hunchback of Notre Dame.
And you know it. Hey, do your jetfish impression for you?
Speaker 2 (19:10):
What is that?
Speaker 3 (19:14):
Hugh Millon?
Speaker 2 (19:16):
What a great quarterback and a family of quarterbacks. I'm sorry,
all right, we gotta go, you gotta go. Hey, listen,
good luck tomorrow. All right, just grab something to hang
on to for four hours. You'll be fine, all right.
Enjoyed Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
That'll be Dan Helly's inner thigh. There you go.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Enjoy Thanksgiving with the family. Tell everyone I said a
law we love you and we're talking a week el Gina,
Happy Thanksgiving and happy Thanksgiving to the great Mellon family.
Speaker 3 (19:49):
All right, man, see it, pal, all right, I'm gonna
beat the doc. That's true. The dockies. What time is
your flight tomorrow?
Speaker 2 (19:56):
By the way, Oh, he left ten o'clock, all right,
So at ten o'clock tomorrow, start praying for Petros that
he has a safe flight to East Lansing for the
Michigan State. I gotta get home too, all right man,
and then pray for him on the way back. Good stuff.
We're gonna break more with you Millon next on ninety
three three kJ r F
Speaker 3 (20:12):
M woop coop coop m ohop
It's time for our weekly conversation with college football analyst
Petros Papadikas.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Not that I'm a smart guy, I'm stupid.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Brought to you by Sweet James Accident Attorneys forty. If
you're hurt in an accident, called Sweet James right away
at eight hundred, five hundred and fifty two hundred. Sweet
James will be sweet to you, but tough on insurance
companies that will bully you.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
Rue but I don't know bo.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Now with Petros, Peer's Dave's Softy Muller.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Lighty boys and girls.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Here we go on a Wednesday after ned right here
on ninety three to three KJR FM, Softy Dick Jackson.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Dick is out here in for Dick. Yes, it's true
this man has no tick, but it's our pleasure, our pleasure.
He's not here. Yes, it's true this man has no tick.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
They got a second. I gotta do the old intro
thing here. He is the king of sports talk radio
in southern California, Father of the year, husband of the day,
friend of the month, one of the all times great
Greek American athletes of all time.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
Our friend that Trus Papa Doukas. Courtesy of.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
No One and only Sweet James Bergner, the dense beard
of justice, who can come through for you if you've
ever been hurt in a car accident, motorcycle accident, if
a dog has ever bitten your balls.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Sweet James knows the ancient secrets.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
In which to come through for you. If you've ever
had one of these things before, you give him a
call at eight hundred and nine million. That's eight hundred
nine million, or sweet.
Speaker 3 (01:43):
James dot com. How are you bal? I got it? Well,
you really want to know?
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Yes, yes, yes, yes, I mean I hate when people say,
how are you?
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Is it the fungus is the fungus back the rash?
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Well, I did grow up with exzema, and that's not kind.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
Oh Jesus.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
I'm sorry, Jesus, because I'm I've have a lot of
crippling anxiety.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
I don't know if you've ever pen some of your
listeners deal with that. I'm show over what what's going on?
Talk to me. They're making me travel and it's hard
for me, as you know. So I'm going to Michigan
State on a red eye tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Oh Jesus, tomorrow night. Copy's terrible. Well, it is why
I had a whiskey. I forgot I was going to
do the show, so we had an early show. Yeah,
so I got done early. So this is live, folks,
and always of course. And I had an early show
(02:47):
and I had to tape some of it because I
had a meeting with Greg Chiano because that's who's playing
Michigan State Rutgers. And after the meeting, I forgot about
this show, and I had a drink and then it
was like, hey, give us a call.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
So yeah, but anyway, Petross feel a little jolly here
on a Wednesday afternoon, More like crippled with anxiety going
into a tony degree game with a red eye and
a weird connection on.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
The way home. You know what, you got to get
over a pell? You really do? You know that's not
a nice way to speak to somebody with anxiety.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
I don't care.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
You want to be like Madden and take a.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Bus kinda No, I want to be like me and
live here and never go anywhere. Well, I mean, honestly,
let me ask you a question. If this is such
a problem for you, why do you do it?
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Great question? I just say I can't do it. Well.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Look, when a football coach calls my number. When Jonathan
Smith says I need to see you.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
Shut up. You know I'm voter the weird kind of shoulders.
Oh dude, it's the word.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
I love him, Jonathan, What are you doing? Relax?
Speaker 3 (04:05):
He's the best.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Is a twitch come out? When Jonathan Smith says we
want to beat in person? Right, forget that whole Thursday
thanksgivving with your family. Well you're telling me you hear Friday. Okay,
Jonathan Smith calls you up.
Speaker 3 (04:19):
No, no, I go, I go. He calls you up,
and the red eye I went on. I'm meetingsday. Shut up.
You tell him I got anxiety all eligible. Okay, you
know what, I'm gonna have a few beafs on the roster.
They they sir, Let me show you. They have Aiden Chiles.
That's right, defensive end right right right?
Speaker 2 (04:39):
No, the quarterback, the corr who is the defensive end
from Oregon State they.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Had last year.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Well, don't forget Jack Velling, Husky shut down the tight
end Jack Velling.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Sorry remember him? Not really, I.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Don't remember much of that game a year ago. By
the way, that game a year ago was in the
rain driving home, almost got killed in the car on
the way home, Anthony Jones. Who is the who is
the defensive end for them? They're big defensive ends. Cut No, no,
you just made that name up.
Speaker 3 (05:13):
No Swannye. Swannye used to play there back in the day.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
He tipped the ball to win an overtime game against
USC Don't you say Swany's made up?
Speaker 1 (05:22):
For real?
Speaker 2 (05:22):
Who's the guy? Who's the I don't know. I'm sorry,
I gave it up on the board. I threw the board.
Who was the freaking guy?
Speaker 3 (05:28):
All right? What do you want to talk about? Oh?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I Will Chatfield? Andrew Chatfield is the guy. I'm thinking
not on the roster you got you? Maybe leg, but
just say just time out for a second.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
Time out.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
Jonathan Smith calls you and says he didn't call me. Okay, Well, if.
Speaker 3 (05:42):
Michigan State said that we're planning to meet in person.
Speaker 2 (05:45):
And you tell them you can't do it, no, you'd
say it's going to be no, no, no, no.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
I need to make money.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
I work at I work at Fox. Fox says you
get to call most of the games from home. They say,
I have to go. I gotta go hang on a second,
just usually around Thanksgiving, I gotta go Okay, hang on, John,
it's softy. Do you realize that Petros has crippling anxiety
and you're making him fly out?
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Doesn't matter. I'm flying out there anyway. I just said
it to Jonathan. It can't be changed. I just do that.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
I just don't. That's not cool, man, tell them it's
a joke. Well, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I got Chatfield's
not on the edge, you know, I'm I'm looking forward
to it. Actually, my uh my wife's parents were married
or engaged at Michigan State and shortly after she was born,
almost very quickly divorced, but still like to visit the place.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
Is the who's the coach that got fired? What's his name?
The guy that was having phone sex? What's his name?
Mel Tucker? That's your guy, mil Tucker, My guy? What
do you mean, my guy? You're more into that?
Speaker 2 (06:55):
I'm Mel Tucker. I could just see I'm a mouth breather,
but I could see you really mouth breathing.
Speaker 3 (06:59):
Oh really? Oh yeah, you know.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
The wife is listening right now. Literally, Gene is tuning
in right now. She literally just texted me, is this
you getting me back for the making funny?
Speaker 3 (07:10):
Because you have anxiety? Is that? Is that why you're
doing this? Who me?
Speaker 1 (07:13):
No?
Speaker 3 (07:14):
The other guy? Of course you? Why am I trying
to get you back? Look ause you just got mad
at me for making fun of you. Well you shouldn't
have texted the head coach. Well I really didn't.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
It was all theater of the mine kidding sheiano now,
Oh dude, well good luck with that.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
I'm sorry that you have.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Where's Hugh Millan? He went to the bathroom and he's
probably mad at me. I haven't texted him back. I
love Hugh Millan.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
By the way, you know where hu Milan's been you?
What's up man? Where you've been? Just been around? Yeah,
he's around somewhere. You owe Hugh a text? Yeah? Probably.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Well, hey, Jackson, if you can get him back, put
him on. If you can get him back, go ahead.
He said that he wandered away. He told Hugh to
go away. Well, here, wandering away could mean a lot
of things. He may have left the house and walked
down the street for all we know. How much you
want to bet I can throw football over the right.
We could have won staked like you forgot that you
had to do this segment today.
Speaker 3 (08:05):
I did.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
I totally blew the morning one, gonna I'm a mess.
There's a chance and Jackson, I blew my national show
this morning.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
I didn't even show.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Oh with Fox correct. Were they pissed? No, they blamed themselves,
not for relying on you. I guess I can see
that I'm pretty reliable. You are, I Jed Jackson can
confirm this.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
You are.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
Out of all the shows that you and I have done,
hundreds of shows over the last twenty years, I cannot
think of one time where you have and I'm sure
it's happened once, but I cannot think of one time
where you've blown us off. Well, what usually happens is
You'll just call me on the phone and then I'll
be like, oh, god, right, and then we'll do it.
Then well, I uh, there's by the way, I think
we're going to get Huan them good because there's a chance. Yeah,
(08:49):
just like you forgot this segment, there's a chance that
Hugh went to the bathroom and forgot that he had
to come back on we us at four thirty.
Speaker 3 (08:55):
Well, sometimes people got to blow it up. That certainly
could happen.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Hey, uh, what's on the Greek Thanksgiving menu? I'm on
Uh I did some red Eye to Detroit. You that's
not until like eleven o'clock at night. Though we haven't.
We asked this every year, but you we have a
traditional Thanksgiving and they add some Greek stuff.
Speaker 3 (09:14):
Don't you have a nice dinner before your red eye
tomorrow night?
Speaker 2 (09:17):
I guess blow it out on the plane. I'm on, uh,
I like you on the toilet. But we probably will
have why, We'll probably have some domadis, you know. I'm
on the grape leaves. I'm on probably have some spinac.
I'm on kozanas kitchen dot com and I'm looking at
(09:38):
a traditional Greek Thanksgiving meal. Well, how there is no
traditional Greek Thanksgiving Greek salad?
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Do ahead, mashed potatoes, green bean. I mean you didn't drink.
Spank your pita?
Speaker 2 (09:56):
What is that?
Speaker 3 (09:57):
I'm gonna spank your peda?
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Uh, citrus, turkey, spinach and the cheese you with pumpkin?
Whatever the hell that is?
Speaker 3 (10:06):
You want to talk about football? No, talk to Hugh.
He's back. Go ahead?
Speaker 2 (10:09):
What hey Hugh?
Speaker 3 (10:12):
Yes, yes, finally somebody to talk to.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Boys.
Speaker 4 (10:21):
You guys are gold man. I just stay the hell
away from you guys. You just do work your magic
what's happening.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
I owe you a text, Hugh. It's all good, So
let's talk.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
What do you want to tell me?
Speaker 3 (10:32):
The you gave me the gentry? You know? No, I
have to full full disclosure.
Speaker 2 (10:38):
Uh my telephone number and Softy can can Uh if
he's not gone, you can attest to this. Uh My
telephone number is sponsored, so I give it out once
a year on the radio show. And it's been about
twenty years and the number hasn't changed since I was
a teenager. So uh so everybody has my number. I
(11:01):
get about six hundred text a day and sometimes somebody
and the reason I can discern is that somebody's name
is in the phone, but your name is not in his,
Hugh Millan, unfortunately, it's don't answer, no, I made a mistake.
It's in his high milon.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
I don't know. Well, Tim's name high like the guy
from raising Arizona or a yeah, like an old Timy name.
It's in there.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
And uh so sometimes it gets by me through the wickets,
through the catcher and the rise and speak and I apologize,
but I love and respect you and I'm happy to
be speaking.
Speaker 3 (11:36):
Well.
Speaker 4 (11:37):
We got a visit that and a conversation that does
not belong on air, and you know what.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
I'll copy that. Okay, yeah, that's fine. Well I'm down
here and fight the fight, you know, Hugh, Wait a minute,
Wait a minute, your sons of bitches. You can't go
on the air and tease us like that.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
What the hell's going on?
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Hey, sof you never looked through the face mask of
the packed this is my name, Hugh, you know, yeah,
Well guess what I looked through the face mask of
a plastic face mask at Kinko football my junior year.
Speaker 3 (12:07):
So suck it you and I've been through the walls.
Do you know the story when when Dave went to quit?
Speaker 4 (12:16):
So you need to hear this, Dave, tell the story
when you quit football?
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Why?
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Why?
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Why are you doing this? Hey? I quit football at CAL.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
I left Cal in the middle of the night and
Hitchhike told him like an idiot, So don't feel bad.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
I don't feel bad. And I was like a big
recruit for them, and I completely blew it.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Well, I was not a big recruit, although my mom
got me on the Michigan recruiting list somehow. And I'm
getting letters from Bo Schimbeckler, hand signed by bo you've
seen those. Hugh telling me he's been following my career
with great interest, which I knew he was a liar.
You gotta have a guy that puts her hand on
the ground. He was looking for a Jewish long snapper,
(12:54):
and my name came up on their database. But I
went to quit my senior year because a guy transferred
over and took my starting center job, guy named Mike Chamberlain.
That bastard transferred over from Inner Lake. And I'm like,
I'm not gonna go do this and get beat up
and just not to start. I've been waiting for this opportunity.
And so Dwayne Hatch looked at me. I swear to God,
this is true, Petros and said, well, I'll tell you
(13:16):
what Peter. So, yeah, it's Dave coach Steve And I
saw him like ten years later, and he's I swear
I had a Peter Maler. Yeah that was me, of Putts.
I didn't even know who I was, so.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
I felt like that, Yeah I quit.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
Yeah, why you couldn't just kick you over the guard?
Speaker 3 (13:39):
No? No, there was somebody else there at guard?
Speaker 4 (13:41):
No?
Speaker 3 (13:41):
Yeah, what about the other bad news man? Bad news anyway? Yeah,
Well I left callum humiliation. Yeah, well tell us that story.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
I got a nervous breakdown.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
Hey, you're not supposed to laugh at this year. It's twenty.
That's funny as hell.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
There's a book written by a really famous author, like
really high end literature. And the guy's name is Don DeLillo,
and he wrote a book. He wrote a lot of books,
but he wrote some very famous books. But he wrote
a little novella called end Zone, and it's a weird
little book about football. And in it, the player is
(14:23):
like a Penn State white running back who gets obsessed
with like some girl in a dorm and like goes
insane and locks himself in a room and won't come out,
and then ends up transferring to like a small Texas college.
And then the book goes on from there about football,
and then very slowly. It's a short book, maybe one
hundred pages, and I would anybody who's interested in the
(14:44):
weird ethereal kind of bigger meaning of football might want
to read. It's only about a hundred you know. And
then it kind of just slowly morphs into the language
of nuclear war, which is the language, which is the
language of football. It's the Great Iron all of those
things are nuclear war. That's what's them. That's what they
(15:07):
based it out of all of it. Yeah, defense leverage.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
You know, when I.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
Think of a guy going and saying locking himself in
a dorm room, playing football, going nuts over at chick,
I think a nuclear war.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Well that's what it came to at the end of
the book. Got it.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
But but anyway, Yeah, I read that book, and maybe
I read that book a long time ago, and it
helped me understand why.
Speaker 3 (15:26):
Yeah, ask him that question again here he didn't hear that.
I said, what's white got to do with it? I
was like, what what? What?
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Like?
Speaker 3 (15:31):
I was expecting a certain you.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Know what in that time, probably nothing, because at Penn
State you had John Capilletti and stuff like that. Right,
But when I played football, everybody was black, and I
talked like I was black for years.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
Did you really? Yeah? It took me a long time.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
To not wow, you know, when I was talking to
other like football people, like what would you say?
Speaker 3 (15:51):
I'm not doing it?
Speaker 2 (15:52):
But for years and years I used to also speak
Patois because we had a Jamaican nanny, so I kind
of came by it naturally.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
Geez, Okay, Well, you know that I do know that
about it.
Speaker 4 (16:02):
But you know, you remember when Barkley said, Hey, this
is a hell of the times we're living in where
you've got the best rapper is white and the best
golfer is black.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
Yeah, I mean and and uh, I mean when when
Toby Gerhardt was really the guy that I was like, damn,
you know, this is a white running back and he's
worthy of winning the Heisman. And then McCaffrey came and
and now it's you know, it's a different word. Come on, man,
give us a little bit of an example of what
you would say, just as I mean, we got it
(16:36):
says like Barbara Billingsley talking jive in airplane.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
Come on, it's just the way people.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
We've just had five black guys text the show.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
They want to know what you sounded like.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Come on, it is not how people talk anymore anyway.
I don't have auto tune. Okay, fine, all right, well whatever,
come on. That was a good joke, recorded and texted
to me off the ear. I promise I won't play.
We used to listen to screw music. Do you know
what screw music.
Speaker 3 (17:07):
Is like when you're doing it?
Speaker 2 (17:08):
No, screw music like DJ Screw and Michael five thousand watts.
We had a lot of black guys from Texas in
my time.
Speaker 3 (17:15):
You've told that story before.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
You Well, what I'm saying is they were all you know,
And this is not a this is not a hidden secret.
There was a big and still is a big promethesne
codeine drinking problem in Texas. And the rap music was
super slowed down, and then they would slow down the
voice too, because you know, hey, you're on cody, so
(17:37):
it'd be like gropp.
Speaker 3 (17:43):
Like that, and that's that's what I grew up.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
God, no wonder, you can't even get on a dem plane.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
Like that.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
So we used to live like that. You know, That's
that's not how it is. You know now the rappers
wear tight jeans. Oh god, they're for government supremacy. It's
really weird.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
Hey, how real quick, as we're running out of time here,
How badly? What do you guys, Harlan coming on? No,
he's at five? You want to hang around to an
extra segment?
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Not? I mean you're you're already drunk. What the hell's
the difference? I'm not drunk. That would take him a
lot more. How badly are the Husky's going to get
turass kicked on Saturday. And Eugene Well, I think because
of the last three years, not the three years, but
three games, right, the last three games. Don't do the
Jonathan Smith's long gone.
Speaker 3 (18:42):
He's a great coach. You missed him when he left,
Jimmy Lake, we did. Absolutely, He's a great dude.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
I love you missed him when he took that Michigan's
State job. But he could have had what he could have.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
He could have. Would you rather have Jonathan he or
Jed Fick? Well, who would you rather have? That's a
good question. Actually, you'd rather have the hunchback of Notre Dame.
And you know it. Hey, do your jetfish impression for you?
Speaker 2 (19:10):
What is that?
Speaker 3 (19:14):
Hugh Millon?
Speaker 2 (19:16):
What a great quarterback and a family of quarterbacks. I'm sorry,
all right, we gotta go, you gotta go. Hey, listen,
good luck tomorrow. All right, just grab something to hang
on to for four hours. You'll be fine, all right.
Enjoyed Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
That'll be Dan Helly's inner thigh. There you go.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Enjoy Thanksgiving with the family. Tell everyone I said a
law we love you and we're talking a week el Gina,
Happy Thanksgiving and happy Thanksgiving to the great Mellon family.
Speaker 3 (19:49):
All right, man, see it, pal, all right, I'm gonna
beat the doc. That's true. The dockies. What time is
your flight tomorrow?
Speaker 2 (19:56):
By the way, Oh, he left ten o'clock, all right,
So at ten o'clock tomorrow, start praying for Petros that
he has a safe flight to East Lansing for the
Michigan State. I gotta get home too, all right man,
and then pray for him on the way back. Good stuff.
We're gonna break more with you Millon next on ninety
three three kJ r F
Speaker 3 (20:12):
M woop coop coop m ohop
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