The Woody Show July 15th 2024 Podcast

Cheers and Jeers, Weakest Link, News Headlines & More! 

Episode Transcript

(00:02):
What is the dune to the graphicnature of this program? Listen to this
question. Is it lies? TheWoody Shows. The Woody Show Insensitivity Training

(00:37):
Class is now in session. Agood morning, everybody morning. It is
Monday, beginning of a brand newweek. Monday, July the fifteenth.
Payday. No, that's right,you payday, Greg Happy payday. We
are the Woody Show. God,there's Greg very happy now. Yeah.

(01:00):
I thought you were a guy wholooks at your bank account multiple times a
day just to make sure it's stillthere. I do, but not this
early in the morning. Yeah.I thought that it might be like the
first thing you do when you wakeup. Oh, it's like the ten
thing. Turn the alarm off,check the bank, the bank. I'm
sure no one has taken on yourSaturday mornings. I do that. Yeah,
first thing I do when I wakeup. Yeah, that's how I
caught some check fraud going on.Yeah, it pays to be on top

(01:22):
of them. There's menace it.What's up? I did get paid over
the weekend? You did? Yeah? I got paid early. Yeah.
I don't know why my bank doesthat. I don't have one of those
banks where they they pay you likefive days early or anything like that.
No, it's a mine Bank ofAmerica because we get paid on the fifteenth,
in the last day of the month. So if we get paid,
like say the fifteenth falls on Saturday, I'll get paid on Friday. Right.
If it falls on Sunday, Iget paid today Monday. Okay.

(01:47):
Oh, but because it is justMonday, I'll get paid Monday or Sunday.
It's always Friday for me. Yeah, but if it's Monday, it's
Monday. There's a Sea Bass.Good morning, Sea Bass. Sammy's here.
We got bored. We got CarolineMorgan are associate producer. She is
here. She's been a big staron our social media and oh yeah YouTube
page there. Her dad sent hera text and all the text said is

(02:10):
we need to talk about boundaries.Oh yeah, you don't no limits,
limits, limits. Did he sendher that text when she was touching everyone's
food in the office. No,didn't, didn't say anything about that.
But this is when she was cleaningthe peanut butter off of Greg Gory's toes.
Quite like yeah from the mouth.Yeah, Now, is that something
you might think about asking Mario todo? No, I mean in a

(02:35):
like a planned sexual situation like ifit ever comes up and you feel the
urge like, feel free to putmy feet in your mouth. Well,
first of all, I don't thinkhe would. No, I honestly don't.
But no, I wouldn't do it. Again. I'm just saying that
when when more prudish than I am, that's for sure. But then again,
who isn't right, guys? Yeah, but when she was doing that,

(02:55):
it was enjoyable. Vaughan is here, Good morning, Vaughn. Everybody
else he wants to call him bepart of things eight seven seven forty four
Woody and it's up with the textover to two two nine eight seven.
Obviously a big weekend for news,nothing bigger than the assassination attempt on President
Trump at his rally on Saturday.The shooter id twenty year old loser from

(03:17):
Bethel Park, Pennsylvania. Like dude. The big question really, how was
he able to get up on aroof of a building with a rifle with
a clear shot of where Trump wouldbe speaking? Big question, big problem
for the Secret Service. Biden inthe meantime is up Trump's Secret Service protection?
But how is that already not thecase? Here's a former president obviously

(03:39):
very polarizing. Doesn't matter former president. You know, the guy clearly the
front runner at least for the Republicans, which will be solidified this week at
their convention. But a lot ofquestions to be answered. It's just it's
that man was so wild just towatch it. As far as the motive
of the investigation really slowed down becausethese improvised explosives that the shooter had rigged

(03:59):
up at us his property and inhis car that was at the rally,
his van. I guess he wasstill living with his parents. The gun
belonged to his dad. A lotof questions there too, and they're trying
to get into his cell phone.I think he's probably got like an Apple
an iPhone because they can't get intoit. And that's always been a thing
with some other cases in the past. So that's the latest there. The
saddest part of the whole story isthe guy he was killed, really sad

(04:23):
man identified as a fifty year oldguy, Corey Competour. He was a
former volunteer fire chief. He dieda hero man. He dove on top
of his daughter when the shots started. There were two other people who caught
bullets. They were critically wounded,but the last I heard they had been
upgraded to stable condition. More onall this a little bit later, because
there are other big stories, otherbig stories involving celebrity deaths. Beverly Hills

(04:46):
nine two to one to OH starShannon Doherty lost her fight with cancer.
Super sad, She's been in badshape for a long time. She was
only fifty three. On Saturday,we lost two eighties icons, the first
being Richard Simmons, who died hewas seventy six. TMZ reporting that he
fell in his bathroom, but there'sno confirmation that that had anything to do
with what killed him, but mostlike they had something to do, but

(05:10):
he was found by his longtime housekeeper. Please say they don't suspect any foul
play. The other celebrity loss thisweekend was the legendary TV sex therapist Doctor
Ruth. She was ninety six.She died at her home in New York
City. No cause of death wasgiven, but dude, she was ninety
six years old. Doctor Ruth wasa German born Jewish Holocaust survivor. I

(05:31):
mean, this one had a hellof a life. And again, more
on that with today's top headlines andall the big stories from the weekend coming
up a little bit later on theshow, But man, a hell of
a weekend news wise, phones areopen eighty seven to seven forty four.
Wooding hit us up with a textover to two two nine eighty seven.
I know kind of makes for anawkward segue, but I'm gonna try my

(05:54):
best here with a question, areyou burned out? A lot of people
are, and they're deciding to skipvacations going anywhere, even staycations, which
you know are close to home,and they're doing what's called a sleep cation,
and millennials and gen z are themost into it. They're also being

(06:15):
called napcations, so doing that overtrips that are planned with a ton of
activities. There's another stat showing thatsixty one percent of young travelers are focusing
focusing on self care and personal wellness. So all these luxury hotels are now
offering innovative sleep enhancing amdities. Whereare these innovations? I saw stuff like

(06:36):
I was. I just checked intoa hotel recently where they had this stuff
that you could spray on the pillow. It's supposed to make you sleep better.
It's like I didn't do it,but because I was like, now
that's gonna make my I don't evenknow what it smelled, because I didn't
even open up, Like, Idon't want to spray anything on the pillow.
It's to make it stink, andI'm gonna be pissed. Yeah,
because I do require three pillows whenI sleep today. Yeah, one under

(06:57):
my head, and I have tohave one on either side of me because
I'm side sleeper. So when I'mlaying on my left side, I need
one to you know, kind oflike put my arm around. And then
when I turn over, I don'twant have to take the pillow with me
to the other side, so Ihave another pillow on that side, but
not between the legs. No,No, I don't do it. I
don't do that. There are numerouspillow mists. Yes, that's what sleep
deep pillow spray. Okay, right, and yeah, Greg, you hit

(07:20):
it on the head. It's lavenderblah blah blah blah blah. Again,
essentially it's too powerful. Yeah,it's only twenty two dollars, right,
yeah, your face. It wascalled being tired. Yeah, but there,
you know, because remember I lookedfor a while there, I was
like, oh, it's the homeof the Heavenly Bed. That was the
brand Heavenly Bed or the what thewhat they named them, I think was

(07:41):
the w hotels that had the HeavenlyBed, and you can go buy Heavenly
bed, red spreads, jeets andall kinds of stuff. But now they're
really kind of leaning into that kindof thing because an innovative sleep enhancing amenity
is what the people want. Hilton'stwenty twenty four Trends report finds it's a
top vacation priority across all age groups. So are you down for a sleepcation?
I would, I mean, justby the name alone, I would

(08:03):
feel guilty because I don't like toguilty. I love doing nothing, but
I also hate just lying around.I gotta do it some production, right,
there's there's a happy medium, andyou don't have to hit fifteen sites
a day. You can sleep inand maybe do one thing in the afternoon
and get and you'll get plenty ofsleep. All I want is early,
check in late, yes, checkout later, checking into the hotel at

(08:28):
five pm? Right, Okay,So that hotel that I was just mentioning
that had the sleep spray or whateverthe hell that's going innovative. The check
in time was four pm and thenyou had to be out by eleven a
m. Yeah, aren't ready.They don't have enough cleaning staff to get
through all the rooms I check.We don't need excuses. Yeah, first
off, like a noon check it'scalled rodblots. Yeah, it's called roadblots

(08:52):
number one. Also, I checkedinto several hotels in London at like eleven
am number one, Marriott, Bonvoy, Platinum an eight am check in.
I love the marriyout hotels. Man, I am a fan. I am
a Bond Boy member as well.Yeah, and they're pretty good. But
still it was a Marriott property andit was four pm check in. You
got to go. Yeah, goon the app and you can request early

(09:13):
check in. Yeah, and Idid. And of course every time I
get there and I need that,I never get it. They will offer
you late checkout usually not a problem, but that even if you pay for
it. I would pay for earlycheck They have some hotels that make you
like, oh yeah, your room'sready, but you have to pay if
you want it before checking down.Yeah, yeah, I would do that,
and I do that. Yeah,I've done it because I'm like,
what am I going to do killtwo hours. Usually you're tired from traveling,

(09:37):
right, but it's sitting there ready. That is such a greg again
demeanor. I checked into a differentnot a Marriott hotel in London. I
was there at like eleven thirty.You're nice, you're sweet, you're pleasant
about your eyelash exactly, because thenwhat did you do? I did that.
I'm actually reading this book by thisold FBI interrogator and he got people

(10:00):
to admit to hateous crimes to himthat put them in jail for the rest
of their life. So being nice, being sweet, being pleasant, people
will give you things that they likeyou. The one hotel that I had,
this thing happen where it was likeyour room's ready, but you need
to pay to get it early.It was through a machine like a kiosk
checking kiosk. Also, the donot disturb door hanger things. We need
a better design if you're going tohave if you're going to have door handles

(10:24):
that have the opening on the oneside, because every time you open the
door, it falls down. Youopen, the door falls on the ground.
They never stay on there. There'sonly one design I've ever seen that
works, and it is a stringon a piece of wood. Oh yeah,
because it doesn't catch with the windlike little piece of does, or
it is installed the lights like someof the speaking of which I got the

(10:45):
red the Riot Act on my cruisebecause I turned on the do not disturb
light, which I menace. Goodidea absolutely. The second day, they're
called me, sir, we needto make your room up right now,
sir, when you're gonna be outof your room, you need to make
it up. I want them towell. I said, no, it's
fine. You know I don't needit. Sure, you don't you need
you true, you don't need towelslike No, I'm good. I got
two or three. It's just meand here. It's fine, trying to

(11:07):
give you a good customer. Sothere's a tip at the end, exactly.
And there's a difference between that andbrow beating. I got a phone
call. I got a second phonecall. I gotta knock on the door.
We need we need to make keepyou well. When are you gonna
be out today? I don't know. No, I don't have my schedule
to day. Yeah, I haven'tmade a night. YEA. Guess what
happened? They never came in myroom and everything was just fine, but

(11:28):
I know I love that. Now, did you get out of the tip?
Did you uh t that you getJack for tip? That place was
as clean as when I walked intoit. When I left it, Oh
yeah, totally all that poop andin the shower. Sure it was very
clean. I still stomped in iceand clean. I still tip, though,
because I'm happy that they stayed away. Here's I stay away tip.
I don't need I don't need youto come in. The phones are opened

(11:52):
eight seven seven forty four. Woodie, you can hit us up with the
text if you like. Over totwo two nine eight seven some more.
Woody Show is next, Hang onSiddy Show next. What's up everybody?
It's a minute now. You mighthave been listening to this podcast and heard
that we're gonna do a meetup atRaising Canes in North Hollywood tomorrow, Tuesday,
July sixteenth. It is canceled.Do not show up. We couldn't

(12:15):
get the permits. I apologize,but please do not roll through. You
can still roll through though. ThisSaturday. I will be at Citadel Outlets
for sure from two to four pmin front of the giant boombox. It's
the world's largest stereo at Citadel Outlets. I'll be doing giveaways from two to
four pm. Free ice cream,a five hundred dollars Citadel Outlet gift card,

(12:35):
giveaway, theme park tickets, concerttickets, Woody Show, merch and
more this Saturday, July twentieth atCitadel Outlets from two to four pm.
In the meantime, keep enjoying TheWoody Show podcast. Ladies and Gentlemen,
John Boys, Boys, Normal Boysand Girls. Still Woody Show. We

(12:56):
are into another new hour of insensitivitytraining for a politically correct world. It
is Monday morning. It's the beginningof a new week after a very busy
weekend. News Wife July the fifteenth, twenty twenty four Onmwoody. That is
Greg Gory. Good morning Menuce,Good morning to you. Good morning Woody.
There's a sea bass. We've gotSammy bort Is here. There's Caroline

(13:20):
Morgan, our associate producer, Vaughnour video producer, doing a great job.
Phones are open eighty seven seven toforty four, Woodie. If you
want to call in be part ofthings, you can do it. That's
the best way to do it.Call in eight seven seven forty four.
Woody Text works as well, textus over to two to nine eight seven,
email email at the woodieshow dot com, or you can find us on

(13:41):
the social media platform of your choiceat the Woody show Man. So some
weekend cheers and jeers, I'd saythat the sea Bass walked in with some
kind of like food thing or atleast a box from three cheers. Hey
menue w don't you have one?Ooh? Menus was so what is it?
The last thing I had was thosefrittatas with the uh yeah spinach,

(14:03):
and that's part of my cheer.Well, here's the problem, because they
had vegetables and menaces totally spit themout. Yees too. Vegetables. They
were really good. So they're likeegg white fritatas with with vegetable like some
spinach and some bell pepper and stufflike that's RELLI very good. They were
really good. I found them thisweek and at Costco, So twenty come

(14:24):
in a box. I think itkind of sucks about him. Those they're
individually rand I told that to Greg. No, Greg, don't you know
how much people love the environment.No they don't. They don't nobody because
each one is in a little plasticwrappers. But now I have a new
breakfast routine. Seventy you could eat. You could eat the entire two and
a half pound box. It wouldonly be fourteen hundred calories. I had
three of them. I'm away intowork this morning, and it was delightful.

(14:46):
How did you make them? Airfryer fifteen minutes? Wow? Wow?
And they came out perfectly. AndI put him like in a little
container. Leave them in the fridge. Took three this morning. You can
eat them cold, you can eatthem reheat it. They're so verstive about
thirty it's in the microwave. You'reall good, that's all great. Yeah,
yeah, I keep promoting that garbagesea bass. What did you bring
in today? These aren't new,but I saw them as I was looking,

(15:07):
and I saw them for tatas,and I thought, well, menace
will cry if we get more vegetables. So what's better than vegetables? Sausage
wrapped in blueberry pancakes? Oh yeah, Jimmy joint for a while. But
in the freezer section with all theother breakfast quote unquote breakfast stuff, this
is li. Let's say you wanteda breakfast corn dog, right, but
you didn't have enough sweet in yourcorn dog and you want sugar. Way,

(15:31):
it's just blueberry flavoring with sugar,so sure, don't worry about that,
manue, it's not actually it's ahot dog sick wrapped in a blueberry
pancake. Now they're delicious, butI can tell these were microwaved versus scraps
e vent oven or the secret oventhat you have so toaster oven or their
fry next time. Yeah, noteven way better. Would it be good
dipped in syrup? Oh yeah probablyit wouldn't be bad. I don't think

(15:58):
it taste of me with meat.Yeah, yeah, it wouldn't be bad.
I mean like thinking about like youknow, syrup and sausage and hot
dogs. There's another sausage so shealso, thank you, we get some
range dress and whatever. Yeah.Yeah, well hot sauce way better.
Uh my cheers and jeers. Veryquick. Found the fritata stuff at Costco.

(16:21):
First of all, trip to Costcothat was awesome. Ran into a
couple of listeners people very nice,but loaded up on stuff at Costco because
it hadn't been there for a while. Found the fratatas, which is great
because I've been eating really well fora solid week. Good and you know,
I've stayed on track and this isgoing to just melt make that easier.
So that's good. Uh, butreally just over the overall, like

(16:42):
this weekend, I actually spent qualitytime with my children. Oh wow.
Like my daughter went with me toCostco. That was nice. My son
I took him to his hockey game, and you know, we spent some
time, you know, going oversome of his work stuff. I was
teaching him about like past ubs andlike father son stuff. So he's actually

(17:02):
he's getting shifts in now. Ohyeah, yeah, yep, yeap,
yeap a week or what nu yeah, something about that. I mean he's
working like four or five days aweek. There's probably a limit with his
age he can work through the summer. It's crazy forty two hours a week.
Nice wo yeah mega lucky, Iknow. And they're paying them seventeen
dollars and twenty two cents an howcan he buy a house yet? Yeah,

(17:26):
it's gonna start paying rent? Isthat a living wage? I very
rarely have those moments, you know. And it's not like I never spend
time with my kids. I do. I'm saying, like quality time.
There's always stuff that's going on.Very busy, hectic, but you know,
my daughter and I spent some qualitytime, not just at the Costco,
which he loves going to, butthen you know, we were in
the pool a little bit and swimmingand hanging. It was it was just
cool. It was cool. Myjeer is to an organization that I've always

(17:51):
had a lot of respect for him, thinking, man, it's gotta be
such a crazy job the Secret Service. Yeah, yeah, Like I always
thought, like when the Secret Servicedid their like detail leading up to an
event, that I thought they weresealing manholes, like I thought they had
peop trees, protectors, anything thatwould be any kind of clear shot from
you know, whoever they're protecting atthe time removed. I was really I

(18:15):
mean, you know, the wholething was shocking, but I was really
surprised, Like, dude, Icould have told you, hey, look,
is anybody like why do you nothave? In fact, people did
tell me, why do you nothave like a chopper in the air like
looking down and like scanning rooftops andgoing, hey, that's not one of
our positions, or at least dronesthey say they have drones. Now menace
from the conspiracy angle, does thismake the GfK people think, oh,

(18:38):
yeah, I guess one weirdo.Can you kind of do this? Can't
he? That hasn't actually come upin the conspiracy. There's a ton of
conspiracies. Well con a connection hasnot maybe like oh maybe that was maybe
that was possible, but yeah,like we could. I mean, Trump
is so lucky to be alive becausethat actually is not a very hard shot

(19:00):
from that range. Ye, hisdoctor told him three Well, the doctor
at the hospital on three quarters ofan inches had been turned the other way.
He had been a dead man.If you just know basics about shooting
a gun with the scope goes backto the JFK thing. A yeah,
sharpshooting marine actually pulled this off,whereas a twenty year old Again another bad
look for white guys with greasy hair, unfortunately. Yeah, anyway, this

(19:22):
is the second time, like I'vebeen very disenfranchised with. That's another organization
I looked up to so hard forsuch a long time, like man,
that'd be so cool, Like NASAjust had a lot of respect for him.
Lost a lot of respect for NASA. And after this whole thing,
and man, the Secret Service man, really, what the hell? What
a whiff? Such a man.Embarrassing incompetence is rampant. It's not just

(19:47):
your job, it's all just alsosea best. You've been kind of saying
this for years on the show thata lot of security is a facade.
It's not really that secure. Andalso that's the stadiums and stuf up or
they higher dopes off the street.It should literally be the best of the
best. Yeah, I was.I was having dinner with this guy very
he's a very wealthy dude, anduh, he was going to uh where

(20:12):
the hell was he? Oh,he was going to Mexico City for you
know, he has a house inMexico, so he was there. But
they were going to Mexico City forlike some kind of like art festival or
whatever. Sounds awesome. He hadme at art festival. Really the show,
but when he goes into areas ofcertain areas or whatever, because he's

(20:32):
a high value individual, there's aheightened awareness about maybe kidnapping and things like
that. So he has like anarmed body guard. And even this one
armed bodyguard said, hey, wegot to go right now. He's like,
why he goes because I walked inhere with a handgun and they didn't
even stop me. He goes thatjust these this just shows me that the
security here sucks. We gotta goso and he's like, all right,

(20:55):
that's why you that's why you paythe guy like he I should not have
been able to get in here withthis handgun being not questioned whatsoever. We
gotta go with guns whatever. Yeah, people say, Oh, Mexico City,
it's so beautiful, blah blah blah. Well I know people who've lived
there, and yeah, that's notuncommon that if you have any kind of
job at all, that's not evenlike a billionaire, you have to target.

(21:17):
Was like man and another friend ofmine, he and his wife and
their young daughter, she was likefour at the time. They were gonna
go to Columbia for a wedding andI go, is that safe? And
they go, no, no,it's fine because we're gonna have bodyguards.
Like the fact that you have tohire bodyguards in armed vehicles to go to
a wedding options the car. That'swhat I said. Take all the money

(21:41):
you spend for a flight and lodgingand these armed bodyguards and send them a
gift with all that money. Andif you even if you were going to
go, why bring your four yearold. You know, why bring a
four year situation? Why would yougo without her at all? Because if
something happens to you now, she'sorphaned. Yeah, they had I'm not
going smart. That's probably good.A couple of bro types who go to

(22:03):
Columbia, Panama, et cetera.I actually a friend that just got back
from clean because it is cheap andthe drugs are everywhere, cools surgery.
Yeah, but if those are yourpriorities, I'm okay with you going there
because if you don't come back,nobody will miss it. Not running the
four year olds? Yeah, GregGory Weekend cheers and jeers. I'm going
to give cheers to Amazon Prime Videofor having a feature that I knew existed

(22:26):
but I never used until this weekendbecause it was such a busy news weekend.
And that is the live news featurethat saved my ass because I cut
the cord a while back, reallyand this was really a great tool.
So cheers to Amazon Prime Radio.W News just like random, I mean,
it's streaming, where's it coming from? Where where's the news? Like,
what's the source? There's ABC There'swhich I thought was like the regular

(22:48):
ABC weekend news, but it's thestreaming version of it. Yeah, they
have that on YouTube. Actually,it's like on YouTube where you can just
stream news twenty four hours a day. It's cool. Some of them even
show you how many viewers are watchingat the time, and I thought,
wow, not much. Why it'snot that many headlines live now. Yeah,
it's pretty good. That's a goodfeature and I need to know.

(23:10):
And then jeers to what happened thismorning on my way to work where I
was almost killed swerving and hitting thebrakes to avoid a bunny rabbit that ran
out in the street. I camewithin millimeters hair, within a hair of
hitting it, and it was likea It was like a TV commercial because
all of a sudden, I skiddingand swerving, and I thought, you

(23:33):
know what it was, Probably wouldhave been safe for just to run the
thing over, but I did.Probably, Yes, it's a bunny rabbit,
Greg, And I was elk.I was going down a hill at
time, and it kind of likezigged and zagged right in front of the
tires. I'm like, not thatway, and I turned the other way
so and then it hopped off.So it's alive. But I will stop

(23:56):
experience. I will stop or swervefor a dog or a cat, anything
else that I see in the road. At this point, I'm really not
stopping if it's smaller than my carobviously deer cow, because that could be
a problem because I just I justsaw something recently and they were talking about
like just how many people total theircar really injure themselves and they're swerving out
of the way of like squirrel,right, I know, or in this

(24:18):
case a bunny rabbit. Yeah,come on, man, your instincts kind
of just take over. I mean, there's something running across and you just
swear. Yeah. But again,if it's something really small and you just
keep going, I don't swear,I just slay them on the brakes and
if I hit it, I hitit. I really almost crashed. No,
but Bonnie the bunny's fine. Bonnie'sit's relative to the one that lives

(24:40):
in front of the front door thatcan maybe any time it wants. Doors
are always open. Weekend Cheers andJeers just kind of hung out this weekend.
Did a lot of swimming, whichis always fun. Love swimming,
But my gears is I finally watchedthat Challengers movie The Zendaea like threesome movie
that she had. It's on streamingright now, and I was really hyped

(25:03):
for it, and it was allright. It wasn't like crazy that ending
made no sense to me, butI mean there was a lot of hooking
up. Is it one of thosemovies that you're interested, it's going okay,
and all of a sudden it's justover. Yes, wait, don't
you hate that any but like solike no resolution. No, And that's

(25:23):
what like mainstream movies are doing,and that that came from independent film.
Independent film loves doing open ended endingsthat you don't know what's gonna happen,
but there's no closure because there's noplan for sequel. It's just there's no
closure or whatever. And then mainstreammovies are signed to do that, and
it's so annoying. I hate it. I even say it out loud to

(25:45):
the movie. As the screen turnsto black, I go, you better
not roll the credits. This betternot be there yet. And then the
credits start. I say, there'sbeen a couple of times where I just
by myself up in the room,I go, what right? And I
hate some of those movies get likea lot of acclaim yeah, because it
just can it continues, we're smarterthan we're smarter than you. It continues

(26:07):
to make movies with no closure.I hate it. Yeah, so awful
that metas when you say you dida lot of swimming, Like Greg and
I were having this conversation last week. Now, when we say we did
some swimming, that means that wesat in the pool. Yeah, we're
just kind of like chill aft inthe pool. You're not like doing laps
and stuff. No, no,no, you're just kind of woul doing
like a little half ass float inyour back or something. Yeah, under

(26:29):
water, a couple of laps,but like the entire time. Yeah,
that's typically to go get your poolnoodle or something. You know, you
spend down to the other end,kick your feet back to the other side.
You know, if you're laps ina non lap pool, you're a
weirdo. Yeah true, Yeah,yeah, all right, weekend cheers and
jeers. Sea Bass cheers for mebecause I did actual laps in real pool.
No big, not a lot.That is not a big deal,

(26:51):
my seventy six year old stuff.It's a mile and a half a day,
Yeah, big deal. Cheers tojust a guy I met and he
walked up the mountains, you know, a little cart narking as normal,
and he walks up to me andhe's a shorter guy, like probably five
to five or something, walks up, you know, takes a picture,
et cetera. I look over.He's got a wife who's like five eight
noise, It's like all right,dude, and then three three kids because

(27:14):
they're so they're banging. Oh yeah, yeah, she was like pretty decent,
look good. Yeah, the king'sout here getting something because these days
is all we've heard the past fewyears is oh, you've gotta be six
foot two. Women are so superficial, such bitches about that's a website menace.
So you keep talking about, isthere a website of the calculator that
figures out a woman delusion in yourcalculator your female delusion index or something.

(27:37):
Yeah, so they take actual dataand six to two he's got to have
a six pack and make two andfifty thousand dollars a year. Yeah.
Right. It shows up the fourguys near you who are like that,
well four guys in America and theydon't want you, right, that's what
I want. So that was reallycool to see that, like in real
life, Like so cheers to thatguy. Cheers to that guy. Nice
cheers actually to myself. Oh grant, you're gonna you're gonna find this disgusting.

(27:59):
Oh So a while ago, Iwas driving around and I've had my
car's thirteen years old and I neverreally you know, it's got a tan
leather interior with tan seatbelts. Ilook down at my driver's seat belt.
I's like, this seems like straightup black, and I was like,
that's pretty gross. But it's oneof those things where it because it's you
and it's you're just you know,just just thirteen years of Yeah. So

(28:22):
I finally took it. I waslike Sunday morning, I was up early,
like I'm gonna go to one ofthose car washes. Took it over
there, and then it's one ofthose things that you never think to really
clean, and said, I wouldnever think to clean a seat belt.
Well look these days, they're blackalmost Oh my god, probably fifteen shades
lighter. What the hell fifteen becauseit went from dark gray too. I
mean that's kind it's wet that itlooks you're kidding, that is black.

(28:45):
So yeah, because I just pulledit out of my you know, shut
at the door on it and justhit it with the spray gun for a
good ten minutes. Wow, andit was I felt so gross. I
mean, I'm glad now, butlet that be se mess as a guy
who claims to wash his sneaker aftereverywhere, I just throw them in with
the rest of the laundry. Wow, that is grinders discussed. I don't

(29:06):
really care too much like my carmade, I wouldn't be grossed out by
it. But now, that's thatis pretty bad. But you usually don't
realize how dirty something is until youstart cleaning, right, true, but
it's one of those things. Ilooked over at the passenger seat belt as
it was, you know, normaltank and mine was like, oh,
that's great. Jeers. I'm lettingthat gover as long as I did.
But I'm glad I got all right, sammy weekend cheers and jeers. So

(29:29):
my gears is. I flew upto visit my friend and on the flight
during takeoff, somebody had their halfdrink ice coffee and water bottle just sitting
on the ground, so it startedrolling back in the middle of the aisle.
So I caught the water bottle andthen was able to kind of catch
the ice coffee. Now I'm holdingthese ways catch the ice coffee like it

(29:51):
didn't spill. It was spilling asit rolled, and then I caught it
so it didn't keep rolling back thejackass, and so now I'm alling these
things. Nobody turned around to seewhere there's stuff went. I don't even
really know whose it is. That'sthe airborne version of a person who leaves
drink or something on the top oftheir car. So I'm thinking, okay,
once we get up there, thefastened seatbelt light will turn off and

(30:14):
I'll give it to a flight attendant. Whatever. Well, the flight ended
up being so turbulent that no flightattendant was ever allowed to get up,
and the seatbelt sign was on theentire flight, and I sat there holding
somebody else's trash for the entire durationof a flight. You are a hero,
I know. And that's what Iget for being a good person.
Next time, it's rolling all theway back and I don't care. I
would have believed that's your cheers.I would have got it. I would

(30:36):
have got up and gone to giveit to the flight attendants at the front
of the plane, but you couldn'tget up. I would have gotten up.
Ye see, because that's you're aflight rebel. That's why tell me
what you do you feel like you'rebeing around? How long was the flight?
Like an hour? I know,like they'll still get up, like

(31:00):
you to hand me a water bottle. Yeah, they were making announcements the
whole time that nobody was allowed toget up and the flight attendants would not
be coming around and they had tostay in their seats. Yeah. I
feel like they do that for alot of one hour flights. Yeah,
exactly, it gets a cabinists.Yeah, they don't they don't have to
poury like you know, sprites.They don't have to give out any you
know whatever free snag all the stuffthat they would normally just be able to

(31:21):
give out for free, not thestuff they sell. But they're they're saving.
Uh. Yeah, I'm not sayingthat turbulence hasn't increased, because it
has from the flights that I've beentaking in the past couple of years.
But I think within the past year, Yeah, there is like, yeah,
the service not available, do youto turbulentce Yeah, and then then
you have a clear flight the rightand the flight's not even like bad at

(31:44):
all. Weird I see how that'sannoying. But you could have just put
in the seat pocket. There wasno seat pocket. There was no seat
spirit, no seatpocket. Oh that'sright, Yeah, that's right. They
don't have seat pockets. Yeah,was it as Stanley Tumblr? No,
right, so you're here. That'syour cheery. No, that was my
cheer was cheers let their step rolldown the aisle. I thought you were

(32:05):
praising yourself. I swam this weekend. My cheers is to my I went
to a dinner at an Italian restaurantwith my best friend and it was so
much fun. And our waiter wasthe best, and he brought us free
lemon Cello shots and he took onewith us, and I forgot how much
I like Lemonchello. So that's mycheers is to our waiter. You know

(32:29):
how when you go out to dinnerlater like shots, Yeah, all the
time. Who are you with mybest friend? Another girl? Yes,
that happens. Mus live in thisworld where they think that happens to everybody,
because that happens normally. Yeah,you want to you or your friend
or both and he's looking you up. Yes, it is so nice,

(32:52):
so nice. He was from Italy. He was from Florence. We had
a great there we go. Yeah, cheers and jeers. You guys,
how was your weekend? You wouldlike a yeah? Way, so it's
a geting between your thighs? Yeah, how you say here a three or

(33:14):
some you would know what pay?I get off at the ten And then
about the fifteen minute after that,oh ide set show well on big weekend

(33:35):
for news, What a crazy week? Yeah, a lot of a celebrity
death Beverly Hill's nine O two oneoh and charm star Shannon Doherty lost her
battle with cancer. She was onlyfifty three. She'd been in bad shape
for a long time. Diagnosed withbreast cancer back in twenty fifteen, went
in to remission for a while,and then it came back two years later

(33:58):
and it was just back in April. She was talking about how she had
started preparing for her death. Shewas cleaning out her storage unit. She
was giving away all these personal itemsbecause she didn't want to be a burden
to her loved ones. Very sad, so awful. Yeah, Shannon Doherty
lost to cancer at the age offifty three. And then Welcome Saturday Morning
saw the story about how doctor Ruthhad died. Now. The thing is,
I know a lot of people thoughtthat she was already dead. Yeah.

(34:21):
Back in the eighties, Doctor Ruthhad a huge call in radio show
in New York City was called SexuallySpeaking. If you remember that show Love
Line with Doctor Drew and Adam Carroll, it was love Line way before Love
Line, and that led to hertaking that show to TV. She was
the go to expert for these talkshows and news programs. Had a crazy
life. Yeah, she was soold. She was Jewish, born in

(34:44):
Germany in nineteen twenty eight oh andwhen the Nazis took over, she was
about ten at the time. Herparents sent her to a school in Switzerland
to keep her safe. They stayedbehind to care for the grandmother, and
then her parents and the grandmother wereeventually captured and moved to a concentration camp

(35:05):
where they were killed. And thenafter World War Two, she was seventeen,
she ended up in British controlled MandatoryPalestine. She was four feet seven
inches tall, joined the is Israelimilitary as a sniper. Awesome, nice
true story. You always heard thesejokes about mister Rogers and he had like
a tattoo for all these kids thathe had, but no, Doctor Ruth

(35:28):
was actually a sniper and then shegot wounded. There was a mortar shell
attack in Jerusalem where she was andshe almost lost both of her feet.
At that point, she's like fthis studied psychology and the rest is history.
Moved to America, star of theradio show Doctor Ruth is pretty badass.
She was always on TV when Iwas a kid. Yeah, everywhere,
and Sammy, you were taller thanher, I know. And then

(35:52):
a few hours later, a newslord that Richard Simmons had died. He
was seventy six, which is hisbirthday on Friday. We just had a
birthday day after his birthday. Accordingto the TMZ, he fell in his
bathroom. Oh serious, Yeah,no confirmation of you know what that had
to do, if anything with hisdeath. But that's or even that if
that's where the housekeeper, because that'sthe one who that's the person who found

(36:14):
him. Was that the housekeeper whohad been his housekeeper for ever found him
unresponsible? Yeah, but not necessarilyin the bathroom. We don't know that
much yet, but he did havea fall. Please still don't think there's
any you know, foul play.But Richard Simmons huge in the eighties,
major fitness group, guru, totalcharacter man. He was everywhere. He
moved to LA in the seventies.He's from New Orleans, moved to the

(36:36):
LA area in the seventies, openedup a gym. He held all these
fitness classes, ended up with somecelebrity clients there and that led to you
know, TV and just big famebecause he had just this personality that just
I mean, it just jumped outat you. It was incredibly likable.
He was known for his positive,flamboyant energy and was last seen in public
in twenty fourteen. And he gotaway from public life because of the demands

(37:00):
of keeping up with his persona.And it's crazy to me, it's tiring,
is how What's more tiring though that? Or how do you stay out
of the public? Guye for thatlong and modern time. So they said
that he would dress up in disguiseand so go outside. But it's weird
how he just suddenly disghosted everybody.He made no announcement. It was showing

(37:22):
up to places. Yeah, theywere showing all sorts of clips of him
on Letterman And I forgot how badI used to feel for him, Like
why are you going on the showwas hilarious. Letterman and Howard Stern both
basically just called him gay to hisface. Right, They were just bagging
on him the whole time. AndRichard's personality, it seemed like, no
matter what the context, he wasalways on the brink of tears. Yeah.

(37:45):
Always. But don't you think thatwas like part of I don't know,
he was part of his stick orpart of what he was. I
mean, he was in on it. I think, yeah, he wouldn't
keep going back on there if therewas just a yeah, I'm sure he
handled it fine. My favorite storiesis from Howard cert said that Richard Simmons
was the first famous person to evergo to his house, and so he
set up a bunch of food anda bunch of shrimp, and then rich

(38:07):
Simmons, any of it, tookthe bowl of shrimp and threw it into
the pool. Great sorts of protein. I don't know. I was watching
clips of one of his exercise videoswhere it's like the the you know,
the the plinky plunky music, andhe's, okay, now lift your arms
up. I love you, Ilove you, I love you. Yeah.

(38:32):
Richard Simmons died. Also, therewas a a football player who just
died on the weekend. Jacoby Jones. Yeah, he was a wide receiver
for the He won a Super Bowlleast with the with the Ravens. He
was like forty years old. Yeah, and then his family said that he
he died peacefully. He must havehad enough. Yeah, I'm not sure

(38:54):
exactly, like you know what tomake of that, but people just don't
drop that at forty. Yeah,was he sick? I mean yeah,
to be Yeah, I really don'tknow, but yeah, a lot of
celebrity death over the weekend. Yeah, and then of course the whole assassination
attempt with President Trump on Saturday andButler Pa sane. Yeah, wild times,

(39:16):
man, right, wild times.What's the latest on that, Greg
Gordan? Well, Trump is recovering. They say he's in great spirits after
that bullet grazed his ear. FBIdid identify the shooter, some twenty year
old loser from Bethel, Pennsylvania.Also a guy named Corey comparatour retired firefighter.
He was at the rally and killedwhile shielding his family. And then

(39:37):
today the Republican National Convention starts inMilwaukee and former President Trump posted on truth
social that he had planned on arrivinga couple of days late, and then
said, you know what, forgetthat. He announced that he changed his
mind. Can't allow a shooter orpotential assassin to force a change in his
schedule or anything else. So heactually landed in Milwaukee yesterday and people thought
maybe he wouldn't go, and thenthere there are no known threats against him

(40:00):
at the moment. The FBI's WisconsinField office says there has though been an
uptick in threats online, but theRNC Secret Service coordinator says they've made absolutely
no changes to their security plan.They're confident with these plans that they have
in place. They point out thatthis is such a national, huge event
that it's already what they considered anational special security event to begin with.

(40:22):
I saw that Biden upped Trump's SecretService protection, Like, how did he
not already have the highest level protectionas a former president period? I'm sure,
and then as the if you're aformer president, and then as the
front runner for the upcoming election,right, I mean, well, at

(40:43):
least for the Republicans, right,you would think that automatically that would have
kicked in. There was something clearlythe Republican nominee. We've known that for
forever. There's some people in Congressthat were trying to reduce his level of
security, which because of his criminalconviction, I guess so. But did
he also trump science something where theystop getting security after ten years as well?

(41:05):
For all that I know, Ijust wonder, like, like,
how at this point in the city, in the election cycle, like he
didn't have the highest already? Nowhe does? Now he does? Yeah,
now now he does. Here's theother question I have. How big
is the bandage going to be onhis ear when he comes out of the
convention. He's not going to rocka bandage. I don't think so either.
Okay, So a friend of mineand I were talking yesterday. He

(41:28):
goes, Dude, I would comeout with the biggest bandage. You know,
it almost looks like half a helmet. I go, no, dude,
no, you look weak, youshow the wound, you have the
stitches on there, whatever. LikeStill I wouldn't even have taken the blood
off my face. No, no, no, I would have left that
either. Like warrior paint, youshow up in the same suit, same
same shirt, right exactly with itopen at the top. Because once they

(41:50):
tackled on the ground. It's likeshirt got like ripped open, like Jesus
piece. You know. Yeah.Biden addressed the nation last night. I
don't know if you saw that.Speech was about six minutes, talking about
how we're not enemies, we needto step back and take stock time to
cool down, and also mentioned thathe spoke on the phone for a short
time with Donald Trump Saturday after thatshooting. FBI is investigating secret services and

(42:14):
investigating. They say they're gonna leaveno stone unturned except for the cell phone.
They can't get into his phone.It's one of those situations where the
phone they can't get into it,and you know, and Apple's not going
to help them get into the phone, say anything happened when the people shot
up Sam Bernardino, and there wasall this information apparently on the phone,
but they just couldn't get into it, and you know, Apple and the

(42:37):
laws. They confirmed they found bombmaking materials in his car at the rally
and at his house, which they'regoing through. They're going through everything.
That guy's family is said to becooperating with federal investigators, but they really
aren't talking to the media or anythinglike that. They said he could have
probably propped his eyes open and usedface ID, but I heard they blew
his face off. Yeah. LikeI saw a photo that looked pretty real

(43:00):
where he was bloodied but recognizable becausethe people on the ground said that when
he got hit it like look,it looked like his head exploded. Yeah,
photo, Yes, it's pretty discernible. Yeah, I don't think that's
accurate. Right, But you see, the Daily Show's not going to the
being canceled. I guess they justdon't think they're smart enough to make good
jokes about this. No, Trumpmade a statement. Yeah, I saw

(43:24):
that leaders from all over the worldhave weighed in with the same theme,
like there's no place for political Yousee, there's a there's a trading card
that was like put out not byhim but by some just some company.
That's the Trump assassination trading card.Oh, it's just him. It's that
photo with him in his hand.Up fifty century replaced his I Try and
album covered his show. Yeah,and then yeah, I saw that ye

(43:45):
Ye wood Show, how would youlike to win a ninety inch tcl TV?
Yes, you've got some friends overat Tclans of the Woody Show,
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(44:09):
the details that you need there abouthow you can sign up to win this
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this is at home, way biggerthan that. I'm aware of how
Benjamin works. Yeah, yeah,thirteen Yeah, and I obviously like,
man, maybe this is a littletoo big ninety eight inches? Can we

(44:30):
put that in the studio? Yeah, we can't easily where I guess maybe
behind Woody if we got rid ofthat stuff, where would that fit?
Yeah, that's what she says.There. There a bunch of places anyway,
thanks to tcls more for you saleall this week at tcl dot com
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(44:51):
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(45:12):
to see the picture alone. Yeah, because like you know, menace is
menace, so not exactly sammy likesomeone's super tiny. You know. Like
sometimes they'll put like something for forscale in the picture, like oh,
here's a dollar bill or yeah,next to whatever this is to kind of
give an idea just how big somethingis. Menace is standing behind just the
box. It looks photoshopped for this, Yeah, ninety eight inch TCLTV.

(45:37):
It is not phoshoped, not photoshopsat a scale. But you can sign
up to win that right now onour Instagram at the Woody Show covered guess
what the Woody Show? All Right, So the involuntary manslaughter case against Alec
Baldwin has been dismissed due to allegedmisconduct by the p I. Guess the

(46:00):
judge agreed with Alec Baldwin's lawyers thatprosecutors and police had withheld evidence on the
source of the live round that killedthe videographer Ollina Hutchins. Her family,
though, plans to continue their civilsuit and they'll definitely will definitely win that
one, I'm sure. Yeah.A tractor trailer hauling forty six thousand pounds
of beef crashed through a Wendy's inPennsylvania on Friday morning. The driver said

(46:24):
his glasses fogged up, he droveinto the building out the other end,
and he almost hit the holiday innext door. I mean this Wedday's is
demolished, deroyed, Oh, destroyed. Yeah, the cops they are investigating.
But in the meantime, all fortysix thousand pounds of the beef,
Greg had to be destroyed. Oh, I know you love that self driving

(46:45):
a tractor trailers. Yeah. Theprice of stamps has just been hiked for
the fourth time in two years now, seventy three cents, Greg, What
are you going to do? That'sa lot to nail my bills? On
January first of twenty twenty three,they were sixty cents. Now, there's
this dude in Kansas. He's beenall over the news because he's just not
happy about this, like everything here. Surprised you're going that been for somebody

(47:07):
on a fixed income like me,it's just getting worse and worse, and
not just stamps for food. AndI don't drive, but I saw gas
may go up beginnings very soon.Yeah, it doesn't drive, but the
prices are too. Damn. Wedid get a text from the five oh
five said, you know here,we heard on the news that the government
had raised the price on forever postagestamps. How in the world is that

(47:30):
even fair or possible? How canthe government change the definition of forever?
Yeah, you're missing the point ofthe forever stamp exactly right. Whatever stamps
you own are good, are goodforever forever. Right. It doesn't mean
that the price is never going togo up on future stamps. Did you
buy? You're buying futures. See, you buy a finite People made fun
of me when I bought twenty grandworth of stamps a few years ago,

(47:52):
getting savings, right, look atall the big savings. Yeah, thirteen
cents. He's saving what it is? Now, get your bitcoin? I
got stamps, wish I bought themyears ago like you did, right,
in a giant brick of stamps.That's a pretty dumb text. Yeah,
But here's my question though, whywould any buy anyone buy anything other than

(48:12):
a forever stamp? Like, whywould they even exist? I had to
buy a penny. It's been afew years, but I had to do
it for something. But can youbuy a seventy three cent stamp like a
regular quote regular stamp or all theall the news stamps, just forever stamps
like the full postage. I thoughtthat forever stamps were just for a little
while like that's but forever stamps arejust for a specific letter, yeah whatever.

(48:36):
Like I've put international stuff and thingslike that regular stand It cost me
like one hundred some bucks. Amuseum in Australia their pie. They made
some headlines so a while ago forgender discrimination, but now they're back in
the news because it turns out theartwork is fake. The woman who's the
curator of the art collection has confessedthat she painted the picassos herself and didn't

(49:00):
get caught for three years. Wow. So people believed it and enjoyed it.
Yeah, so what's the harm that'sart? Yeah? So you know
what is that what you're saying?Yeah, exactly, Let's say you got
a let's say you got a LouisBuitan belt and found out it was fake,
right you be? I would beand didn't have that belt around his
neck at especially when we paid fullprice. I can't believe both. But

(49:24):
some of that old timey art,if you go to the Louver in Paris,
Like it's not good. It's justlike a lot of people didn't paint
back then, so you know,right, actually way better graffiti some of
it. Some of it is absolutelyincredible, don't get me wrong, but
some of it pretty bad. Haveyou ever seen Starry Night? I mean,

(49:45):
I have pretty cool and some ofthose old timey paintings they look like
photographs. They're incredible. Those onesare cool, but there's some who are
like I get a five year oldto do that. I'm watching them doing
this thing on like Egyptian and Romanpainting and stuff. It's it's like they
straight up suck. Yeah, likeEgyptians were too stupid. Well yeah,
not everybody painted like back in theday, like not everybody had a camera.

(50:07):
So some of the photography are like, oh that's really good, but
now everybody has a camera phone,Like I could do that. Also,
back in the time, they didn'thave like Michael's where do you get your
supplies? Yeah? Where? Right? Right? Hm? Right? Where
are you going to get your chisels? Yeah? So everyone thought you were
the bomb because you could do it. Yeah, this guy's a girl woman,
she's got to be a pretty gooduh exactly, pretty good artist.

(50:28):
Pretty talent in her own right ifshe's able to. That's the thing about
Pacasta though, because he just didthis, like he drew those those dogs
with their eyes on top of theirtheir buttole or whatever it was what they
call it, like the faces exactlypretty still. I mean three years got
away with it. I'm sure acouple of people went through there who knew
what they were looking at her.You know, she she fooled them.

(50:51):
Yeah, art rolls full crap eightseven seven forty four. What he'd be
careful you're sitting right next to anartist. Yeah, oh yeah, my
painting is genuine. You already retirefrom art, Greg, I haven't tried
again because I'm just not pleased.Done and done. Yeah yeah, maybe
someday he's like the kid that wasin Willy Wonka. He played Charlie one
movie and then he's done that kid. That's it, that kid from Flight

(51:14):
of the Navigator movie too, samething, same thing, and one movie.
Well, Greg Gory, Yeah,he is going to be our host
for a round of the Weakest LinkYes okay, which is coming up next
year on The Woody Show. Hangon, you're we look at me.
He'll be right back. Hey,it's man, it's check out the Lazy

(51:35):
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over twenty five dollars. Lazydog Restaurantsdot com. Yes, The Woody Show,
All right, welcome back Monday daymorning, and Greg Gory is going

(52:01):
to be our host for a roundof WOI Show Weakest Link. Yes,
it's time. Usually a little bitcontentious, but usually well every once in
all, we've had some peaceful roundsbefore, maybe one. I'm calling,
I'm pre calling. This is peaceful, O babes. All right, Well

(52:22):
we have brought we brought Morgan into participate in this round of Weakest Link.
And just like the TV show editionof Weakest Link, So Greg's gonna
have all these different questions. We'regonna go around the room and we have
sixty seconds to answer as many questionsas we can. What's the goal,

(52:43):
Greg? How many questions? Usuallyit's eight eight. Now if we do
the eight, are you buying breakfast. Sure, okay, cause that's usually
how it works if you host,right, that's true. I mean the
chance of actually having to buy breakfastpretty small. I don't think. I
see every time I write these questions, which I from the actual show and
some other sources, I think they'retoo easy. And then the last time

(53:04):
you guys thought they were too hard. But I think these are basically middle
of the road. And again chanceis pretty slim. Greg will buy us
dinner now Wenner Brennan party, gregsoh yeah, it could be a party,
Greg, to do that. Let'sdo that. Let's do that than
breakfast, right, yeah, Ido love breakfast for dinner. Well he

(53:29):
could do its. Okay, thatmakes the menu easy. Yeah, just
have a brandcake station. But yeah, it's gonna be get like one of
those waffle makers. Yeah, thepre plates to the actual place that we
get, you know, the settingand where they take them away, don't
actually use them. Oh that's right, what do they call that? They

(53:52):
call that? Say that again?So like when you get to a restaurant,
there's already a plate at your setting, and they come around, they
take those plates because they're for show. Yeah, before they didn't start bringing
out like other stuff. What's thatcalled? I know you don't eat at
places like that, but I doknow what you're talking about. Someday I
want to have the Just for Showkitchen where there's an actual kitchen behind it.

(54:12):
Yes, oh all right, what'splay the weakest Link? And we
are ready to the weakest link?Who would like the first question? Because
then it's not take it randomly,you can pick it right on the gray
pick a person. Let's go,Sammy. That Sammy, all right,
you're gonna be the first one WoodyShow weakest Link Sammy. In the nineteen
ninety sitcom Rock, what was Rock'sprofession wrestler? Garbage man? Menace?

(54:38):
What city is home to the world'stallest skyscraper Dubai? Correct Morgan. What
is the name of the currency usedin the game Fortnite? Oh v Bucks?
Correct Woody. In twenty twenty three, Brendan Fraser won the Oscar for
Best Picture in what movie Well?Correct? Sea Bass Vodka and coffee Liqueur

(54:58):
make what cocktail crushing? Correct?Sammy. What animal is on the logo
for Porsche A bird? Bird?Menace? What is the opposite of synonym
pronoun? Ay? Morgan? WhichNHL team won the Stanley Cup six times
in the nineteen seventies, the Kings, the Montreal Canadians Woody. In the

(55:22):
bureau world, what does ABV standfor alcohol by volume? Correct? Sea
Bass? In the culinary world,what does MSG stand for correct? He
got that one? All right?I think you got it, Sammy.
She's terrible. What you and SeaBass smoking it? Did we already at
eight? Well we would have ifSammy had That wasn't eight, that was

(55:42):
six? That was for us.That's that seemed like a hundred. Yeah,
it was too slow. Well wentlike uh. By the way,
that play is called a charger thatplayed? Yeah, charge texters, it's
charged the table up for chargers aresomething that you put the plate plate.

(56:05):
You can do that too, butdecoration again, I've also heard it used
for that whatever the plate is thatsits there for the setting when you first
arrive that you never actually eat on. Like the minute you sit down,
they start taking all those plates away. Charger plates also called service plates,
under plates, or chop. Thereyou go. I have a set of
chargers. I put the plates ontop. It's like a hard place.

(56:25):
Man. I'm a little embarrassed andI even knew that there was a name
for that. You couldn't come upwith the name. The fact that there
was a name for this little embarrassedwe win. I expect chargers plates,
not chargers the football team. Acharger plate, a charger plate. Yeah,
all right, who gets voted off? We'll start with you, Morgan.
I'm voting, Sammy. Sorry,Sammy? All right, Sammy?

(56:47):
Who gets your vote? Menace?Menace? Menace? Who get your vote?
Sammy? Uh? Sea Mass?You know what it is? All
right, Sammy, lucky you didquite well. No idea, Yeah,
it doesn't mean. It doesn't mean. Joy I didn't think you get the
av that was really Yeah, butI'm not a beer drinker. No,

(57:10):
but I'm alive, so you sayall the time I'm in the world.
Yeah, but that's that's a specificsort of thing. So I'm impressed.
All right, thank you? Wow, look at that Sea Bass. Geez?
All right, what do you show? Weakest link? Round number two,
starting with Menace. The capital ofVermont, Montpelier is the only US
capital city with about what famous popularrestaurant uh Raisin Kines McDonald's. Morgan before

(57:37):
he escaped and returned to France,Napoleon had been exiled to what island?
Oh god alcatraz Elba Woody? Whatathlete had a role as co pilot in
the comedy film Airplane, uh JJSimpson kare Kareem abdul Jabbar Sea Bass?
Which band played at President Bill Clinton'sfirst inauguration? Pearl jam Fleetwood Mac Menace?

(57:58):
What kind of advertised it's were bannedfrom TV in the nineteen seventies.
In nineteen seventy smoking? Correct cigarettes, Morgan. What is the name of
Donald Duck's sister, Daffy Duck DellaDuck Woody? What is the practice of
growing a tiny tree and a containercalled bonzi? Correct? Sea Bass?
In nineteen ninety seven, the Pathfinderspacecraft landed on what planet? Mars?

(58:19):
Correct? A menace on the SNL. Where did Chris Farley's character Matt Foley
live by the river? Correct Morgan? In which country would you find the
city? Geneva? Oh? Japan? Only six wrong that time? Guys,
six wrong? We got six rightthe last time, six wrong.
This time we're getting two enough questionWe got two ten questions, which is

(58:42):
good, but those are harder thanthe first. Geneva. Come on in
well, what's the one that yougot wrong. That was the band that
played at Bill Clinton thinking about tobrillion years old? Sorry? Wow,
the name of the Lone Rangers Nephew'sHorse. What movie is that from?

(59:05):
Menace? I don't know. ChristmasStory? Come on, man, come
on, come on. When itcomes to what he has only three movies.
It's Christmas Story, Princess Bride andBack to the Futures. There's four
movies. There's four, all right? Who gets voted out this round?
Starry with U Sea Bass. Look. I love having Morgan play, but
that was atrocious. Yes, thatwas for three that Morgan, you cannot

(59:28):
vote for yourself. So who wouldyou vote for? I'll go Woody because
you don't like playing all right?Oh thanks man? So sweet? Yeah,
Menace to get your vote, I'llsay Woody as well then, because
I want to hear Morgan's answers.Oh no, they're almost common. I
can't vote for myself. I'll votefor Sea Basters for the hell of it,
which means that Morgan, you havetwo votes the weakest link time out.

(59:58):
Yeah yeah I thought you two boats, did you? Yeah? Yeah?
Yeah, yeah, see I shouldn'tbe in this game. Yeah,
it's just more proof. Okay,all right, okay, okay, So
to refresh. What are you're out? I'm out? Okay, Morgan,
Sea Bass, Menace? My brainpower? Now I'm really feeling this this

(01:00:20):
dinner party where breakfast will be servedat Gregg's. Here we go, round
number three, Morgan. What songalways plays each morning on the radio in
the movie Groundhouse Day? No,I've never seen it. Out, I
got you, babe, Sea Bass. What is the Japanese name for japan
Pong? Menace? What was thename of the boat in the movie Jaws,

(01:00:40):
the Big River Orca? Morgan?When they're trying to warm up chameleons
turn? What color? Whatever colorof what they're on? Black? Sea
Bass? Which TV alien came fromthe planet melmac Mark? Alf Mark Menace?
What is glass mainly made of sand? Correct? Morgan? In what
city will you find Pike Place?Mark it? Oh? Seattle? Correct

(01:01:01):
Sea Bass. I'll be taking thesehuggies and whatever cash you got? Is
a line from what movie Raising Arizona? Correct? That's my fifth movie?
Menace? Eiffel Tower or Statue ofLiberty? Which is taller Eiffel Tower?
Correct? Morgan? What does GPSstand for Man generated Navigating System System Sea
Bass. What is the name ofDavid Bowie's extraterrestrial glam rock alter ego?

(01:01:22):
That is z Stardust ziggy Stardust thatputs us over the top with five dang
it meaning dinner party? Yes?Right, hell yeah, Well, I
mean I have to say like thatwas that was pretty bad that there were
a lot in there that I knew. I'm not a movie person, so

(01:01:45):
our geog references geography. See thankyou very eyes open person. GPS?
What is GPS? Ten? Forthe second one? Is just a word?
Begin and what did you say?Navigation? Navigation? What is it
actually again? Global Positioning system?Okay, three? That times three the
round before? Did you really getthat one wrong? About Japan? I'm

(01:02:06):
the best I Sidney hone, whichI think might actually mean Japan kneese and
not would you say I was wellwithin the ballpark? Still? Ye?
All right, well that's how youplay wood. You show weakest link everybody.
I'm hungry. Yeah, we cando sea beasts and menace if you

(01:02:29):
want one to do it one more? Yeah, yes, yes, you're
Let's go dinner at Gregs. Allright, yeah, this is for dinner
at Greggs. He's going first again. I think Sea Bass. That's all
right. Here we go one lastround for all the marbles Sea Beasts,
which are the following colors? Wasnot an original color in a box of
Crayola crayons black pink, orange orpurple black pink? Menace? In Disney's

(01:02:52):
Peter Pan in order to fly,you need two things fairy dust and what
I'll call thinking happy thoughts? SeaBass? How's your pie? And what
is the capital of Australia Melbourne?Canberra? Menas? What is the name
of Ross's son on the TV showFriends, Rocky Ben Sea Bass? In
the movie Trading Places, actor EddieMurphy trades places with what other acting?

(01:03:13):
Correct? Menace? Which member ofthe Beatles was deported from Japan in the
nineteen eighties for possessing marijuamaccarney Correct,Sea Bass? What he says, occupus?
But how many hearts does an octopushave? Two? Three? Menace?
What was the name of the middledaughter in Full House, Stephanie correct?
SeaBASS? What is the name ofthe feeling that you've experienced something before?

(01:03:34):
Oh? Come on, that iscorrect? Menace? What is thirty
six divided by nine four? Itdoesn't count SeaBASS in medicine. What are
the letters E N T stand for? Oh? E N T good question.
This is the last question. Wehave some time to know. You
don't throats and then you miss.So that's six free breakfast. Wow.

(01:03:58):
Yeah, we're almost there. Thefirst round is definitely our best round.
Yes, I know, I thoughtyou. I mean we were we were
firing and all cylinders there. Yeah. Yeah for seeing me. Well,
Greg SOMEDAYK you for the offer.It was nice. We certainly didn't earn
it. I could have offered upcars and can Woody show weakest link.

(01:04:19):
We're gonna take a quick break morewood he shows next. Hang on,
we'll be right back. What's seventythree minus four? Yeah, it's hot.
Well, here's a dumb way toget fired. This teacher lost their

(01:04:40):
job because the teacher. I guessthey're required to have this app that tracks
their phone activity during work hours,and so a little quick check by the
school district's people found that this teacherwas spending around two hours each day on
candy Crush. She's addicted about twentysix minute cheats each day on the phone,

(01:05:02):
and another half hour scrolling through socialmedia, again during work hours.
Was skinny Cars, the one thatyou were obsessed with, or Angry Birds.
Angry Birds the initial was the reasonI got an iPhone. Yeah,
and then Greg got really addicted tothis one like fake slot machine game past
tense. No, that's president,you're still doing that still. I haven't
bought chips in a while. Yeah, but he was buying fake chips.

(01:05:25):
Yeah. I know there's no chanceto win real money, but he was
spending real money to buy these fakechips, which I don't get great because
there are apps called my Vegas whatare you? Can't? I know?
Real? But this is were betterslot game? And why realistic? Because
the ones that you can actually getreal stuff for the games are lame.

(01:05:46):
These are like the one. Iknow, it's the dumbest thing I've ever
done. And ten days ago Itold myself, don't ever buy chips on
this again. Okay, but likehow because that was apples to apples slot
machine slot machine? Right? Likefor the one like Madison talking about,
compared to the one you play,one will pay you in real stuff,

(01:06:08):
right, the other one is givingyou nothing? So who cares how it
looks? Isn't a matter of justlike spinning and trying to win. I
don't care about the perks of whatthey're offering is apparently not. It's the
aesthetics you want to replay. It'slike the real slot play. Almost no
no, because the real slot play, see, there's a chance to actually
win something that is true. Look, I admit it. It's the dumbest.

(01:06:30):
That's pretty dumb. It's so stupid. And how sad is it that
this school district can't even trust theirown teachers that they have to put their
phone of the kids, the damnteachers. There's a lot of places that
are trying to track, right,I mean, like the the place,
the things that people are trying toget around by making their mouths move around,
the remote workers, the remote workersstuff. Right, people really are
additionally, But you're in front ofyou should be in front of a live

(01:06:51):
audience. How are you on yourphone, dude? I read or something?
Do a test? Now? Beingbeing in school, like in the
eighties and the nineties before cell phones, I could tell you the t I
had teachers where all they did wasthey would put a VCR in there and
they would run like an episode ofdate Line and that was the that was
the class. Yeah, I musthave had the same teacher. There was

(01:07:13):
always that one class. Yeah,she would just sit and look at magazine.
Yes, that's all they would do, and then put on a video.
I remember we would watch the Gandhimovie. Oh yeah, and uh
yeah, a lot of history movies. There was one time I remember watching
Paul Simon Live from Africa or somethinglearn about Africa. It's like, this
is what we did. I know, anytime you walked in and saw the
TV was in there. Yes,guys, teachers are heroes. I thought

(01:07:38):
we didn't we learn that a fewyears ago. Many of them are,
and the like heroic stuff. Isaid, there wasn't the majority of the
teachers that we all had one.I think in our school career there's always
there's always that one. And thenthere's the one who just got away with
murder. But you called him byhis first name. Oh yeah, he
was so cool, didn't care ifyou were late whatever. Investigating this fucking

(01:08:00):
tournament. There's a group of teenagerslicking the feet in the toes of this
other group of kids smears peanut butteron their feet. They're licking it off
feet stuff, so big man,it's hot. It really seems to be
like the in thing right now,what is that about? Like for a
while there, it was like alot of the uh salad saucin yeah,

(01:08:23):
like maximum and stuff like that,men's health. They were really pushing the
whole like prostate stimulation agenda, asif that's what all guys want, they
want their prostate stimulated. And theygot it, moved a solid and every
few years they just recycled. Theyfind something new to pretend anounced feet.

(01:08:44):
We'll never get the answer is whythey do. There's people who love it.
We're into another new hour insensitivity trainingfor a politically correct world. It's
a Monday morning. It's July thefifteenth, twenty twenty four. I'm body.
That's Greg Gory. Good morning,we got menace. What is up?
There's we got Sammy first world problemthat sucks story? So your first

(01:09:04):
world problems. Here's one. Ihit some traffic on the way to work
today. It made my commute thirtyminutes instead of eight. Okay, sucks.
Like these things are you know,real problems. Yeah, but like
comparatively to people that you see someof these things that people are going through
and you're like, oh man,yeah, yeah, I'd rather have my

(01:09:26):
problem. I can't figure out whichvideo game I want to play today.
This text from the six to one. Oh it's rough. My son ate
a hot dog without a bun yesterday, and now I have an uneven ratio
of hot dogs to buns. I'dprobably drive Greg nuts. Of course I
would throw them away. That's whenyou make your peanut butter and jelly sandwich
out of the extra fun, theextra bun. Yeah, I've done it.

(01:09:47):
Have you ever done any hot dogbun? Just with playing cheese like
a cheese slice in there? Iknow, I know, but I used
to do a lot of like cheeseslices and mayonnaise sandwiches. Good, oh
mayonnaise though, Yeah, I'm sayingthe cheese. Ah. Yeah, oh
you need so we'll take one ofyour first world problem calls if you want

(01:10:08):
to call in eight seven, sevenforty four. What are these little things
to just drive you nuts? LikeI was so angry because I have a
thousand different charging cables for phones andaccessories. Yeah, and what I needed
because I have my AirPods. Nowtake a USB c as opposed to the
old lightning cable, which Greg,your phone takes a lightning cable. Oh,

(01:10:30):
that's okay, and you recently learnedabout the different the new ones take
USB C, which everything's moving toa USB C. I love SBC,
okay, because, like you pointedout, you can't put it in the
wrong way. I just thought Ileft out each time. Now I have
a USB C cord, but onthe one end it's a USB C and

(01:10:51):
on the other it's a USB C. But what I don't have is a
little stupid ass brick that accepts theUSB C so I could plug it into
the wall and then use it.So I didn't have. I had a
thousand chords, but not the onethat I wanted. I was so like
over the top and frustrated. Itook the stupid cab like threw it.
H it's the cable's fault, Isay, God, damn it. How

(01:11:12):
do I have a thousand of thesestupid chords but not the one? There's
not one in here that I canactually use. Yeah, it sucks.
Yeah, that's what I am.That's the first world problems the computer.
If you have a first world problem, give us a call eight seven seven
forty four woody. That's eight sevenseven forty four woody. It will compare
your first world problem to one ofthese that sucks stories, which this came
up that I saw this morning.This woman in Connecticut, she recently discovered

(01:11:36):
that her high school boyfriend was herhalf sibling. Nice she found out thanks
to twenty three in me. Oh, and it turns out she has twenty
three half siblings from the same father. Hello, Hi, I'm here.
Fertility doctor who allegedly inseminated her motherwithout her consent. Been a Those doctors

(01:12:00):
are doing a lot of those guys, and it's been going on for decades.
So she was not happy, tosay the least, to find out
that she has had sex with herhalf brother while they were in high school,
only half, which reminds me ofso wrong. I don't know what
it is, but when I kissyou, it's like I'm kissing my brother.

(01:12:27):
I guess it doesn't make any sense. Doesn't believe me, It makes
perfect sense. That's right, Martin. That's from Back to the Future.
He's making out all the rain inthe car. You know he's got to
go through, but he's making uphis mom. Dude. Now these doctors
that are just like doing it themselves, do you think it's just a money
thing because they have a success rate, or they are creeps and they want

(01:12:51):
to have like hundreds of children.I think it's maybe it's more money.
And because you find a person likea Sea Bass out there and then recruit
them, get them to donate,pay them like you're saying menace. Yeah,
that's a whole pay in the butt. And if you're the doctor,
you're like, well, hey,I'm a doctor. I'm pretty smart already.
Yeah, and I can knock itout of the park. Yeah,

(01:13:11):
boom, take that. Well,we're going to take your first world problems.
We're getting some people lined up onthe phones eight seven seven forty four.
What we will compare them to oneof the that sucks stories. I
mean I would put that one underit that sucks umbrella. Yeah, for
sure, yuck, disgusting. Imean you have a problem with that,
even right, Sea Best. Iknow you don't really care about family members
hooking up, but like half brotherisn't half brother. It's a little much,

(01:13:33):
right, And and that's why Isaid, if you are, if
you are a parent of someone who'snot your direct biological child, you owe
it to them to tell them becausethey should be on the lookout for that.
Agree, even if it's just aboyfriend and girlfriend in high school.
Now here's another thing you can dowith a leftover hot dog bun. You
can use to make French toast medallionson that one, right? Is it

(01:13:57):
medallion a fancier than anything else onthat because it's like a uncher toes bite,
make them small, I guess yeah, just you would like do the
make French toast out of it?Right? So you you put it in
the egg wash. Oh, soit's like a like a fry, like
you put it in the egg wash. Like, so obviously the bun is
open face, right, and thenyou put that and cook it like you
would like regular fresh toast. Butthen before you serve it, you don't

(01:14:18):
serve it as one piece, youknow, you cut it down the middle
so it's the two sides of thebun and then into a little smaller like
maybe one inch by one inch medallions. Oh yeah, you don't to if
you just gave it to them whole, they'd be like, oh, that's
a hot dog. More surface areafor syrups. Yeah, all right,
So we'll go to your first worldproblems first world problem that sucks stories right

(01:14:40):
after the break here on the WoodyShow. Hang on, yeah, this
is the Woody Show. This isthe Woody Show. No crap. First
world problems. We're gonna compare themto this week's that sucks stories right before
the break. I told you aboutthat one in the Connecticut discovered that her

(01:15:00):
high school boyfriend who she had sexwith, was her half sibling. Because
the fertility doctor had allegedly inseminated hermother without her consents, she got twenty
three half siblings. But she foundout that, yeah, she's had sex
with her half brother. Oh no, yucky, We've always had this connection.

(01:15:21):
I don't know why. Yeah,first world problem. Tell us about
it, little problem that you madelike a really big deal of nothing.
You can't be frustrated by these things. But when you get that perspective that
you so often need, you seesomething in the news, you hear about
whatever's going on some other part ofthe world, it's like, man,
here, I am bitching about thisa USB cable, right, my god,

(01:15:43):
that's kind of silly. I wasbitching the other day because my neighborhood
had a power out of trawl oftwo minutes and it messed up my pool
pump, and then it wasn't pumpingthe brand new solar system that I got.
Oh no, and the pool wentdown by three degree. Well that's
a really relatable problem, Greg,I know, horrendous. Everybody gets it,
everybody goes to it. Yeah,it's one of Greg's fancy problems.

(01:16:04):
Had that pulses of you have though, was so weird. Never even heard
of it before. I guess maybeit's common. But water gets warmed up
on the roof, the roof andthen gets yeah back because it's they're really
like very small you know, yeahpanel or the where the water runs through,
and so by the sun hitting it, it warms it up. It's

(01:16:24):
like when the water it stays inyour hose, like when you first turn
the hose on, it's really warmbecause the sun's been beaten on it.
The same idea, but does thatlook slightly great? You can't see it
where it is, where it's positioned. Do say how to Natalie? Good
morning? Natalie? All right?So what's your first world problem? Was

(01:16:48):
too hard? I cannot understand what'sgoing on. We have to put you
back on hold. Uh do youwant to do? You want to talk
to her? Morgan try to coachher up on not being on like a
Bluetooth or anything like that, ortalking directly into the phone. Let's go
to Lee. Good morning, Lee, Lee, good morning, good morning.
All right, your first world problem. What do you got? So

(01:17:11):
I work security, So our numberis like prominently displayed everywhere in the retirement
complex where I work. Yeah,so it's the only number that's displayed,
and we just get calls for everythinglike tea times, dinner reservations, directions,
car trouble. Oh yeah, Ican't hick up, so it's good,
Like, oh I don't. I'msorry. Yeah that sounds hard.

(01:17:32):
Yeah, it's sorry about that.That's just like half of the calls I
get. They're just like good butyou're some sort of general help. Yeah.
Yeah, and you're not allowed tohang up on them. No,
all right, like like you getthem off the phone in some way,
like you can't. You just gotto hear them out. I guess that
sucks. I just scold them.This is not this reason for this line,
I know. All right, Sowhile you're dealing with people like that

(01:17:54):
on the phone, Lee, let'scompare your story. I'll give you a
summertime one. This woman was atthe beach in Florida. She's recovering now
because she was impaled by a beachumbrella. Oh god. She was chilling
with her family under this, youknow, large rental umbrella. When the
wind picked up upward of the umbrellasent it into the sky, and when

(01:18:15):
it came back down, it wentright through the woman's leg. It pinned
her to the beach. And becausethe wind kept moving, the umbrella now
was moving around like so it's likeeven more painful because you know, like
when the wind catches like a sail, it's wiggling the post of the umbrella
that's in her leg. The EMTshad to use bolt cutters to get it

(01:18:39):
out of there, but she wastaking to the hospital. She's expected to
make a complete recovery. But dude, that sucks at the beach. Yeah,
I did have another beach story,But yeah, who's problem would you
rather have? There? Lee?You know, I could take a few
phone calls, it's all right,yeah, you know, only get him
paled. Yeah, that's what Ifigured out, all right, Ley,

(01:19:01):
Thank you for the call. Appreciateyou listening to the Woody Show. Yeah,
this other one from the beach isfifty nine year old guys New Jersey
got hit by lightning. He wastrying to warn other people on the beach
about this incoming storm. This happenedat Seaside Park. He told his girlfriend,
I'm just gonna warn these kids becausethe sky's going to open. I'm

(01:19:21):
gonna warn these kids just one minute, and then that was it. He
was at by lightning and then poofdead. Oh man, how sad that
blows. He died doing what heloved. Yeah, warning people on the
beach about storms. Yeah, thatsounds awesome. Yeah, what's your first
world problem? Eight seven seven fortyfour? What if that's eight seven seven
forty four? What are you gonnasay hello to Mark? Hey? Good

(01:19:43):
morning Mark, Hey, Mark,Good morning guys. How are you all?
Good morning? We're doing great?All right, So what's your first
world problem? Well? I juststarted this new job working for ADT selling
security systems here around the Skip Dallasarea, and uh, I visited a
lady on Saturday try to sell hersecurity system, but she was having like

(01:20:05):
a party, so she told meto come back Monday morning. I swung
it back by this morning, andapparently while I was over the weekend,
she decided to get a Scott builtsecurity system. Yesterday. Oh out of
the whole thing. Yeah, yeah, well so what the what kind of
money? I'm always I'm always curious, like in your for like when it

(01:20:28):
gets down like your money, Likehow much did that ended up costing you
out of your pocket? Well?Nothing, since I didn't get anything,
you know, put in the system. I just spoke with her and she
asked me to come back. Butlike if you would, if you would
have installed that system, Like,how much money would you have made the
whole commission that I would have madeon the system. It's depending on what

(01:20:48):
package, right, Let's just saythe standard, right, Like, yeah,
for what she had talked to youabout that much for the for the
most basic package, I would havelost about to hundred and fifty three hundred
dollars. For the biggest package wegot out of a lost pope hundred and
twenty five dollars. So that's theincentive to just get people to sign up.

(01:21:09):
Well, if they get the wholesystem, that system goes in right,
right, Definitely, Well, Imean no, not on a commission,
that's true, Greg, Yeah,but no, not what we would
make on it. Now, I'maultually a pretty decent prised mark. Let's
compare your story to this. Onefifty five year old guy in Philadelphia ended
up in the er after a bstung him directly in the eyeball and it

(01:21:32):
got him right where the iris meetsthe white part of your eye. The
stinger was stuck in there too,so they had to tweeze it out.
Wow, But his eye was stillswollen in bloodshot two days later, and
his vision got worse, so hewent to this eye specialist. Turns out
a small piece of the stinger wasstill lodged in there sick. But it

(01:21:53):
was so small they can only seeit with a microscope and a special die,
so they had to use something calledmicro war steps to get it out.
And experts say that stings to theeyeball they're extremely rare, but if
it ever happens to you, yougot to see an eye doctor as soon
as possible. Man, that sucks. So Mark, I realized you're out

(01:22:14):
a little bit of commission there.But who's problem would you rather have?
I'd yeah, yeah, no doubtgot a beasting right around his eye.
I did see. I saw thatpicture of his swollen eye, and know
how I got that. You alsosee he's becoming more and more just a
greasy homeless person. What do youmean becoming? He's always he feel like

(01:22:39):
he used to be more handsome andI kind of got away with it.
Chick still like him, doesn't matterhow gross and dirty is. Can I
get an actual review on his looks? Yeah, he looks you're I mean,
you nailed it. He looks likesomebody that would be living under a
highway. And why do rich peoplego out of their way to look like
crap like homeless people? He looksso bad? Did you ever like the

(01:23:00):
way he looked? Okay, sothat's the thing. He still looks the
same. You either always found aattractor for you? Did oo like?
He has very lame facial hair.He's kind of oily looking. Yeah,
like he could if he could cleanit up, it'd be better. But
yeah, not good. I'm bythis text. It says first world problem
having too many items in your housethat you don't have storage for all the

(01:23:21):
food and the items. Yes,that is my problem currently. Too much
food. So much food I got, and so much food that I didn't
pay for my There was pasta thatTrader Joe's had. It was a lemon
pasta. I loved it. Igot one box they sold out, So
I asked my mom if the traderJoe's near her had some if they did,
to pick me up some. Shepicked me up like five boxes.

(01:23:43):
And now I'm overloaded with pasa four. Oh no, she sounds terrible.
I know I have boxes. Putsyou over the limit? Yeah you got
a small place, yeah, Imean the van, the backseat of our
car. Could you like, likehow big of the box? Like one
pound boxes? Yeah? Once youdump them all in a like one of
those one gallon ziploc bags so youfit in there well, because the box

(01:24:06):
is taking up a lot, Soyou dump all the dry posts like in
a bag like that. Plus youcan lay it flat. You can do
it, it'll it'll help. Uhtrue. Maybe I can put it in
a fancy jar or something and thenput it under your fit in your car
or menace, menace or what else? Could she bring bacxcess food? What
do you think food to if youcan get rid of it? I don't

(01:24:30):
know. Wait, oh wait,you can bring it to work? Yeah?
Yeah, that's what my wife doesanytime she has stuff that food wise
that she wants to get rid of. Can we get to the house,
bring us to work? Tomorrow exactly, it'll be gone. Yeah, no
problem. Well, let's compare yourfirst world problem saving to this one in
Connecticut. A manure truck rolled overand it's at manure everywhere. The homeowner

(01:24:53):
says that she heard the crash.It was a quote literal waterfall of brown,
she said, as the sewer cameout of the truck and it just
flooded down our property. Cars andhouses were splattered. Her neighbor's property was
even worse. It took cleanup crewsdays and days to clean up. Like

(01:25:14):
I saw, they had like alike a backo bulldozer thing like scraping like
a certain level of the of thesoil because it all like just seeped into
and not to mention like the houses, the cars like they had. Well
cool, they get to bring thepower washer out. But yeah, people
couldn't even stand to be outside thehouse because of the smell. Yeah that

(01:25:36):
sucks. I mean, you knowa lot of posta who's problem would you
rather have? Yeah? I thinkI'll keep the pasta and another chance to
play it back to the future clipalways seems to running the same problem.

(01:25:58):
All right, thank you very much, everybody, quick break? What show
next? Hang on, poor WoodyShow? Is that the Woody Show?
Pretty pretty good? I tell whatI'm doing? All right, Well,
here's here's something for you. It'san email email to woodieshow dot com.

(01:26:21):
This is from Dakota Smart. Dakotasubject cardon ARCS. Oh yes, yep,
while y'all put your cards up becauseof anxiety, Seed Bass, I'm
leaving mine out purposefully just so Ican meet you and get a free magnet.
Love from Irving, Texas. Thatis from Dakota Smart. Thank you,

(01:26:43):
Dakota. I'm crying. You're justtrying to meet you right away.
As I mean. We don't talkabout this on the air, But I
carry stickers with me anytime I goout patrolling because I invariably get folks like
Dakota who want to run right soand they don't want You don't want a
magnet because a magnetis I don't returnmy car like a jerk. You just
want to cartnark sticker and I havethose on hand anytime I Oh, does
your group have a name yet?Oh does my? Oh? Yeah,

(01:27:05):
we're talking about yeah, but likethe they're the girls that are like especially
Hoe. Yeah, there are wetalked. We talked about that about calling
them like, yeah, I meanbecause truckers have lot lizards right in the
parking lot. You don't want totake that. There were a couple of
good because a lot lizards would work, unfortunately, but lot ladies, Oh

(01:27:27):
yeah, a lot, a lotof ladies because you want eight lizards buggy
bitches. Oh that's a good one. I can't use that word. All
right. Here's some other TEXTA camein for the first world problem. Says
I got promoted at work twenty percentrays, but I lost my hybrid work
schedule. No more working from home. I know. Take the money.

(01:27:54):
Uh c J from New Orleans textingin I left my phone at home.
That does suck. Didn't notice tillI was on the interstate. Oh no,
that is to tell you what man. I know again, I can
forget a lot of things. Mywallet. Yeah, you could probably go
the day without your wallet, butnot without your phone. A lot of
other things. Yeah, because Ihave Apple Pay on the phone, so

(01:28:15):
if I really needed something, Icould do that. But yeah, you
lose your phone. You feel solost? Now, Well, under what
conditions would you just leave it?Like, let's say I'm just going to
the phone. I'm going to thegrocery store for one thing. Uh oh,
that's no problem. Yeah, Iwouldn't care about that. It's like
if I'm going to work for theday or already gone for an extended period
of time, meaning at least acouple hours, and the like. If

(01:28:38):
you're fifteen minutes, fifteen, that'sit, that's it. I think if
I just pulled out of the garage. But would it be for you?
I don't know, fifteen minutes.I've been swimming a lot lately, swimming,
man, I will just not lookat my phone or be near my
phone for like five hours. Okay, but this is different when you've left

(01:28:59):
the house and forgotten it's one thingyou've like, just you do something like
that, not even near me.I understand that. But if you were
leaving the house, I think youwould feel differently than what I've done a
couple runs without it, just errands, or I've been slowly weaning myself off
being on my phone, contant,Look at you. You know I haven't

(01:29:21):
like under focus. I turn offmy notes daily. What do you mean
daily average phone? Yeah, breakingup twenty three hours screen time record,
which is down. You guess it. Was just down probably from well,
while you're doing that, what areyou doing instead of being on your phone?
Man, it's like reading books andstuff? Hell no, soaking in

(01:29:42):
water. Just this says my averagetime is fifty two minutes. No,
that's just what you've done today.There's no way there's only fifty two minutes
the daily average. I was pretendinglike it doesn't know where to look.
It was two hours, twenty minutes, two hours, three hours, three
hours. And that used to belike you take something, Yeah, that's

(01:30:04):
not bad for you. That's notbad at all. Well done. One
hour and seventeen minutes, girl.Really, Yeah, that's surprising. Yeah,
I'm not on there a ton comparedto what I used to be.
You know. It's like I'm justnot doing that as much as much.
There are other days, like aweekend day or whatever. But yeah,

(01:30:26):
honestly I'm fighting it boring. Yeah, phone, Yeah, the concept almost
kind of boring. Yeah, it'sdepressing eight seven seven forty four. Woodie.
It's different like if I'm in apool or I'm at the beach or
whatever, like, yeah, whocares, I'll leave the phone in the
room. Oh I do that.If you're like on a vacation or whatever,
like, don't even bring it outactual vacation sometimes not all the time,

(01:30:47):
leave it in the safe. Butthen that's fine. But when you
leave your house and you're out eitherrunning errands or you're going somewhere to a
thing to uh you know, maybea dinner somewhere, or you're going to
work, especially like fifteen minutes,I have to have it. If I
hit that fifteen minute point, thenI may just say forget it and suffer
through it. But if it's lessthan fifteen minutes, I'm turning my ass

(01:31:10):
around. I'm going back for it. Yeah, I probably would too.
All right, let us know howlong you think you could go, like
how far before you you know,wouldn't turn around. That's the point of
no return. Yeah, hit usup on that text Over to two to
nine eight seven Woody Show. Well, I'm back the Woody Show. All

(01:31:38):
right, welcome back everybody. Hey, yeah, Monday morning, we are
the Woody Show. I got thebirthday's porn of birthday coming up here in
just a few moments. But firsta couple of the holidays. Today it
is Orange Chicken Day. Really,that's celebrate whatever happened to Panda Express.

(01:31:59):
They were toying with the idea fora minute about the the orange chicken sandwich.
Remember there. They tested it acouple of places. I thought for
sure that would pop up testing itjust do it. Yeah, I thought
for sure that would end up beinglike a new menu items. You should
be How can you go wrong withthat? You can't. I don't know.
I wonder if people would like this. Yeah, but I think maybe
it didn't work with the combos.Yeah, they didn't want to go like,

(01:32:23):
all of a sudden, they're doingsandwiches. That would just take it's
as hour. It's an easy concept, but to let people know that they
expect a sandwich at Panda Express wouldprobably take years. Yeah. It is
a National Tapioca pudding Day. Noyum. I don't like tapioke. I
do like rice pudding, but Idon't like tapioca pudding. I also don't
like boba like the I didn't likethe texture of the it disappears in tapio.

(01:32:45):
That's good. It is a Nationalgummy worm Day. Oh hell yeah,
my daughter will be psyched. Itis a national I Love Horses Day
with the horses, and it's alsoa national give something away day, which
perfect radio show. Some entertainment stuffthis morning, of course, like you
mentioned the top of the show,a lot of people paying tribute to Beverly

(01:33:05):
Hills nine oh two to one tozero and charmstar Shannon Doherty, who died
this weekend. She was only fiftythree, losing her long fight with cancer.
I mean, like I said before, she'd been in bad shape for
a long time. Diagnosed with breastcancer back in twenty fifteen, and then
went into remission for a while,but then it came back two years later.

(01:33:26):
Back in April, she talked abouthow she started preparing for her death.
She was cleaning out her storage unit. She was giving away a lot
of her own personal items, shesaid, so it wouldn't be a burden
to her loved ones. Very sadstory. Shannon Doherty lost to cancer at
the age of fifty three. Iwoke up on Saturday, Man, I
grabbed my phone and I read abouthow doctor Ruth had died. There were

(01:33:47):
a lot of people who thought thatshe was already dead. Back in the
eighties, Doctor Ruth had a hugecall in radio show in New York City
was called Sexually Speaking. It waslike Loveline. You know doctor Drew Adam
Crola, but Lovelne way before Loveline, and that led to her taking the
show to TV. She was thego to expert for all things sex on

(01:34:09):
talk shows and news programs. Reallyhad a hell of a life. She
was Jewish born in Germany in nineteentwenty eight, and when the Nazis took
over she was ten at the time. Her parents sent her to a school
in Switzerland to keep her safe andthey stayed behind to care for her elderly
grandmother and her family eventually was capturedand moved to a concentration camp where they

(01:34:31):
were killed. And then after WorldWar Two, Doctor Ruth this point seventeen
ended up in British controlled Mandatory Palestine, and at four foot seven inches tall,
she joined the IDF. Doctor Ruthwas trained as a sniper. She
was later wounded in action during amortar shell attack in Jerusalem and almost lost

(01:34:55):
both her feet and after that she'slike f this, and she got the
hell out of all that. Shestudied psychology, She moved to America,
started the radio show and the restis history. Doctor Ruth a badass,
and she died over the weekend.She was ninety six years old, and
then a few hours later, mana news alert goes out that Richard Simmons
died. He was seventy six.It was just his birthday on Friday.

(01:35:17):
We just had him in the Fridaybirthdays. According to TMZ, he fell
in his bathroom, but I haven'tseen any confirmation that that's what killed him.
They're looking at everything. He wasfound by his longtime housekeeper. Police
said they still don't suspect any foulplay. Richard huge in the eighties,
major fitness guru, total character hisstory. He moved to Los Angeles in
seventies, opened up a gym wherehe held these fitness classes, ended up

(01:35:41):
with some celebrity clients, which ledto TV and just really big fame.
He ended up being in TV showsand movies and all kinds of stuff.
Known for his positive, flamboyant energy, was last seen out in public in
twenty fourteen. He says he gotaway from public life because of the demands
of keeping up his persona. Andwhat's crazy to me is how he was

(01:36:01):
able to do that in modern times, with the Internet, paparazzi, social
media, all that stuff. RichardSimmons dead at seventy six. So really
just a crazy weekend of news.No time for the birthdays, showday.
We're gonna it's Shiver Day. We'regonna sit beage. She was like,

(01:36:21):
it's Shure birthday, and you knowyou don't do what birthday? I was
going the birthdays today, celebrity birthdays. Happy birthday to our friend Gabriel Iglesia
is Fluffy birthday. Fluff is fortyeight years old. Today. You got
Forrest Whittaker who is sixty three.He's one of those actors always forget when

(01:36:42):
people go what actors do you like? Forth Whittaker Just hyeah. And we
were just talking about Lazy Eyes theother day, right talking about the King
of the Lazy Eyes. There's someoneyou can look up to, Samon kidding.
Brian Austin Green is fifty one yearsold. You got Adam Savage from
MythBuster who's fifty seven. Let's seeJesse Ventura, the former Minsoda, Minnesota

(01:37:03):
governor and wrestler. He is seventythree. Eddie Griffin, the Undercovered Brother
who is fifty six. Joe Satriani, guitar god, sixty eight years old
today, and he got a coupleof people turned in seventy two. He's
the drummer for the Ramones. He'sMarkey Ramone. He's for seventy two years
old today in Terry O'Quinn, whois John Locke unlost, he's also seventy

(01:37:26):
two and it's also a mother fand Linda Ronstadt's birthday old people. But
she's got she's got a bad caseof Parkinson's. Oh really, yeah,
she's seventy eight years old. Yourporno birthday today is Valentina Jules and today's
birthday slut. She's got more bootythan Captain Jack Sparrow, and she's put
it to work. In two hundredand twelve fine films included you're gonna like

(01:37:47):
this one, see bat Yeah shewas, and cousins can share, well,
they can make sure all about that. Yeah, it's not safe.
Unsafe at their second Gary, youmay be pooping in the shower. They're
scissoring in the penthouse shower our volumeone. Also Hot Girls Scissor at the
Club, Volume one. She wasin Big Booty Hondurian Kouchi, Oh bush

(01:38:09):
or Bear twenty six minutes of Lesbians, Volume one, rare and who could
forget her unforgettable role and I gotbanged by my probation officer. Sounds classy
good. That's a Valentina Jules,who is twenty six years old today.
And that is your Parno birthday,your celebrity birthdays and a Monday morning look.
Just a couple of things going onthis morning here with the Woody Show.

(01:38:31):
Phones are open eight seven seven fortyfour. Woody. Hit us up
with a text over to two twonine eight seven. Can also find us
on social media social media platform ofyour choice at the Woody Show. We'll
be right back. Don't go anywhere. The Woody Show will be right back.
Buila wouldn't approve the Woody Show.All right. Well that's it for

(01:38:54):
Monday, everybody. Okay, wrapit up, getting out of here.
Quick recap what you can find onthe full show by going to the Woodieshow
dot com Weekend Cheers and jeers.That's some of the trending news headlines,
weakest link with our host Greg Goryo, so that a bunch of other stuff,
including the birthday's Porno Birthday. Justgo to the Woodieshow dot com and

(01:39:15):
find today's full show podcast coming upfor you tomorrow. There's a brand new
redneck news, and we're gonna getyour calls and your text messages on this
topic. Some people call them blondemoments or bitch be tripping. This is
all based on I shared a storylast week about how my wife was on
her way home with my daughter inthe car. She wanted me to door

(01:39:36):
dash a meal for my daughter fromMcDonald's. Hey, door dash prices and
delivery. I'm like, aren't youin the car right now? Out there
are three McDonald's between where she wasin our house, so ridiculous. Can't
you just swing by there and pickone up and save a few bucks?
And then she says, oh,yeah, that's what she did. She's
like, oh yeah, So what'syour bitch be tripping or blonde moment?

(01:40:00):
We taking a calls text messages tomorrowTuesday here on the Woody Show, go
to meantime. Anything you got forit you could leave on the after hours
voicemail eight seven seven forty four Woody, that's eight seven seven forty four,
whatie? Yeah, menace ce mas, Sammy. Anything you like to add
No Greg Gory parting words of wisdomplease. Yes. You have to decide
between drinking wine all day or losingweight, so choose wisely between red or

(01:40:25):
white. It's kind of when Iasked you, who would you rather have
the bodybuilder body or my body?Yeah, yeah, you know, it's
just like that, either one.There's no lose really right away, we
all know that Greg would go withthe red one. With red, yeah
yeah, White's just kind of wastetime, Like what is it with white
that you don't like so much?It kind of reminds me of cider.

(01:40:46):
Yeah, and I'm not a bigfan of sider. Yeah. My higher
kind of cider is Dixon's. Dixon'sIt's good. So that's the best cider
out there. Tasty. All right, So thank you very much, Greg
Gory, you got it with Thankyou so much for giving the Woody Show
some of your valuable time this morning. You know, we love it,
appreciate you for that. The restof you guys can suck it. We'll
catch back here on Tuesday. Havea great day. Smdlem I quit this bitch.