TOM SEGURA GUMMIES

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
If you have never been surprise mega dosed, it is horrific.

(00:06):
It is a harrowing, panic induced terror ride. And so
a few weeks ago I did it to my mother.
I was visiting her. She's alone. She knows I ate
them at night. I've told her for a while they
helped me sleep, which they do, and she calls them gummies.
So she comes up to me and she's like, are
you going to have he gati tonight? And I go yes.

(00:32):
She goes, may I have one? And I was like, yeah,
I give her one because I take one and one
gets me high. So I'm like, this is going to
peel back her wig, you know. I sit around with
her for a couple hours and then I asked her,
I go, how do you feel? She goes, I feel nothing? Really,

(00:58):
She goes jesz. I go, all right, well, I don't know.
Go to bed, working savage. I don't know what to
tell you. The next day, it's evening and she comes
up to me again, may I have and nothing? And
got me tonight? I go, you had one yesterday and
you didn't feel anything. She goes, maybe I should take two?

(01:21):
Maybe you should I give her two. We hang out
and again, I ask her, how do you feel? She goes,
I feel nothing. I'm like really, She goes, should I
take two more? I said, hey, Pablo, you might want
to keep it in first for a minute. She goes,

(01:44):
you don't think, so I go, actually, I do think,
so here you go. Here's two more. I give it
to her. She eats them, and then she says I'm
going to bed. I go all right. She goes to
her room. I go to the guest room. A few
minutes later, I receive a series of text messages that

(02:05):
I have since memorized. The first one says to me,
I am fizzing f I z Z I n G.
I right back. Sounds cool because who you know? Like

(02:26):
I'm fizzing right now? Man? You know? She writes back,
my heart rates is one twenty five all I am spinning.
So I right. Lol. I think she's having fun, and
then she writes, please come now, I don't feel well.

(02:49):
I go into her room and my mother is seated upright,
and that is an alarming look for an elderly woman.
Most of the I'm lay down or lean. She's just
in bed, like, I go, are you okay? And she goes,
so I take her out to the patio. I'm thinking

(03:11):
fresh air. You know, it's clear immediately that we are
in for a ride. The first thing she does, she goes,
my lips they oughta stuck together. I go, I'll get

(03:32):
you some water, and she goes, why am I hungry?
Is that because it's working? And she goes, the dog
was here, the dog is gone, and I go, oh
my god. I start to laugh so destructively hard. It

(03:55):
is not ha ha ha. It is a deep primal.
I'm watching my seventy seven year old mother get high.
I'm not laughing. My nervous system is shutting down, all right.
I mean, I'm watching her look at sounds. You know.
She's like, as I'm laughing, I look at her, and

(04:20):
at one moment her face contorts, her face goes, and
she looks at me and she goes, tomorrow your laughter
will be tears on my corpse. And I'm like, what

(04:42):
she goes, it's that perfect murder. Nobody would know it
was due. My lungs invert at this point, and I
have tears streaming down my face. She's so high. She
thinks my laughter is confirming her thoughts. She starts to

(05:04):
legit plead for her life. She goes toll me, please, please,
don't kid me. I am your mother. I freaking pass
out in a chair. I'm like e