September 22, 2023 • 22 mins
Sky is the queen of the awkward small talk. Well, she took it to a new level recently....with her gyno. Plus, we get a bonus wild story from Emily....who may be moving to SkyTown...on today's P1 Podcast.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
We have chronicled over the years.Yes, what an awkward human being Sky,
and how when she's in situations she'splaced into these situations, she can
make an awkward situation a million timesmore awkward with her awkward talk. I
don't know how she does it orwhy she can't avoid doing it. Sky,
(00:27):
Hi, guys, but somehow Skyhas made the uncomfortable gynecological visit even
more uncomfortable. We ain't done yet. It's time for the past, completely
uncensored and unacting filtered except for thatparty. The show's after show starts now.
(00:55):
Man, I don't know how youwomen do this. You spread your
legs open wide and have doctors diveinto your vaginas and like deep look around
and move around, and that's sobizarre. But you know that that system
in there is so strange, mystery, it really is. And also part
(01:18):
of that too, you know,you get a nice breast example too.
So you're laying there and they're like, they're all, oh, they're I
mean, like massaging every single part, like pinching the nipple a little bit,
all of that, and then you'rejust you're just laying there like Okay,
this is normal for this to happenright, Like us guys don't really
have much to say in that realm. Like we get our balls checked.
(01:42):
That's quick, little, it's aquick cough. How's your mother? You're
done? Okay, But we don'tspread our legs open wide and have somebody
jiggle them jerky off a little slapit around smash. Honestly, boy,
we don't have that. No.I forgot to tell you guys about something
(02:04):
that happened with me when I wasat the doctor really quick and involved the
breast exam, and I was thinkingabout Sky the whole time, because Sky
goes to the doctor sometimes with herhusband, which is very weird. And
I went to this appointment with Robertand I ended up having to get a
breast exam. Hold on a minute, Hold on a minute, huh,
what the fuck? Hold on hereabout this? For the first time,
(02:25):
Robert was in the exam room withyou. Yes, not the waiting room.
Oh no, no no no nono no no no no no no
no no no, no, nono no. We have destroyed this woman.
Yeah to me for having her husbandthe boo in the uh exam room
(02:46):
with her for a point. Nowthey have an appointment together which is psychotic,
which is next level to what you'resaying. But the point is they're
they're in the room together. Yes, you had Robert in the room with
you. Yes they're in an exam. But the reason was I had a
scare with my boob and I wantedit was like it was like, Nope,
I wanted somebody there to be with. Nope. You don't think that's
(03:06):
different. Nope. Oh I didn'teven think like I think it's Nope,
apples and orange, nope, becauseI wanted like it was a It was
scary. Like if you said hewent with you and was in the waiting
room. Yeah, totally get that. But the people is weird and you
are now in sky I am not. Yes you are because she's the mayor,
(03:27):
welcome to you are a resident,I'm the town. I am not
a resident. You are. Mostthe entire point of his appointment was to
look at the screen and have himshow me my ultrast. Did you did
you not get a breast example?I did, okay, but he could
be in there for two seconds ofit. It's weird. I thought it's
weird. But the guys, Itake my top off and I have to
do rest I'm sitting up upright.Oh I've never done sitting up on a
(03:49):
man. Okay, So Robert isin here watching another man fondle your breast.
Was that fondling? He is adoctor, Okay, but basically what's
happening touching around, feeling your nakedbreast? I didn't take that was the
thing. Oh, you are becauseof the terms of the appointment different,
unbelievable. Imagine that checkup be defined, it is, be defined. I
(04:11):
want it, I want it rightnow. Because you are. You are
a resident of sky crazy Town.Yes, you are very scary crazy anyway,
are the reason you can dance around. It's fucking weird. Let's say
I got some something weird going onwith my balls. Okay, weird,
(04:31):
but like, what about a cancerscary? Yeah? Yeah, they don't
have testicular cancer. My wife's notcoming in an examine. Really no fun
to look at the No. Iam a man, I'm not going I
can't handle my ship myself. I'ma grown up. And it comes in
now. If I have testicular cancerand they want to talk to us about
(04:53):
my procedures and things like that,yeah, okay, yeah, it's it's
not that's I understand having somebody thereas what do they call it, your
advocate, no nonation, somebody thereyou know who's going to follow along,
and I don't know, you know, because it's overwhelming. But that's not
what this was. That's not whatthis was. Well because normally what you're
describing, Eddie, that's a meetingin the doctor's like office, like an
(05:15):
office with the point not point example, another skywn I can't wait. You
want to go for a walk tomorrow, that's fine, go ahead and tattle.
I think would be would be anyway, we didn't go to the reason
I brought that up. I thinkI thought this is going to be like
a two minute thing. Just stopdown. This is delicious. It is
(05:41):
not what's going on. I donot I take your resident, I take
my top off. And that's whenRobert goes he mouths yeah and there doesn't
say it out loud. This thisisn't part of I don't think it was
(06:01):
gonna happen. But you went infor a breast example, I went in
to look at ultrasound and Robert mouthyeah in the doctor's say it out loud.
I sauth in the doctor, Yeah, that's not weird. I can't
(06:25):
wait to tell thor. Yeah,you can't wait because I can't wait because
he's gonna happen. If Haley hadthis, she'd want him to go in
there, and he'd go in Youdon't know that. I don't don't know
that. That's not what this isabout. Back to you Sky, Okay,
okay, it's about Sky making thingsweird in the doctor's office. But
(06:46):
Robert mouthing, yeah, it's notweird. Not to Emily. That's fine.
Up, there's the reason why youdidn't bring no, bring it up?
Okay, how would I bring itup? Now? Oh? My
town gets more populated everything, andI love it. You know, everyone's
(07:10):
well, we may we may havea new mayor'll give me a break,
give you a break? Stupid,is it? Oh wow, Well I'm
still the mayor, so without ajob. You are not being dethroned yet.
Yeah. So, even though Emily'sstory is wild, I feel so
(07:31):
crazy it is not. No,it isn't. Okay, my my experience
yesterday may be a little one upon on that. I just heard one
of the crazier things I've heard inthe long tw I know, and you're
telling me what you're about to tellme is crazier than that. I mean,
I guess a man in an examroom in a very serious situation,
(07:56):
serious mouthing yeah, seeing her cities. She's telling me that's crazy. All
right, right, well I thinkthat's crazy. But unless the boo was
in your gynecological office and like wasjerking off in the corner, I don't
know. I don't know anything.I'm gonna hear it's crazy. Wow.
Wow, Okay, Well you're fine. You gave me bathroom. This isn't
(08:22):
crazy. That's fine. Okay,Emily, what we got that? I
don't care. Yeah, I'll fightthe battle on my own. I don't
here. I'm one man, armyahead. I'm not participating. Oh really,
I'm not participating anywhere. Okay,I mean, shut up anything.
(08:48):
Oh you didn't mouth that, yousaid it. That's fine, that's totally
in a doctor's office. It's notnormal. That's why I brought it up.
Okay, not anyway. Wow,oh wow you guys. Wow,
Well yesterday my thing didn't involve mytitties. Oh okay, it involved my
(09:11):
vagina. Oh the clam not evercall it. That's not nice. I
mean, I've heard it describe fromthora who weirdly saw your vagina? Okay,
it was slick looking? Who isthat same? Didn't really? Or
he said like two slugs stuck togetherin a rainstorm. Okay, I don't
(09:35):
appreciate that. I don't appreciate thatit was glistening horse eating an apple sort
of. I don't appreciate that neither. I don't want any of these descriptions
swollen catchers, mit, I believeswollen You ever see a box full of
cow tongues? Yes, similar iswhat I believe. He said, none
(09:56):
of this. Well, I'll talkto your doctor when I go to your
next appointment. Ok thank you.Apparently everybody can go to doctor's. Okay,
you're gonna go in out of mouth? Yeah, okay, So yesterday
I had to go in because Ihad to get a little internal exam.
(10:22):
They wanted to look around at stuffbecause I had an abnormal PAP come back,
so they wanted a lot of informationthat I'm not sure I was ready
for. No, nobody was readyfor it. But you know, it
doesn't make sense any other way whyI would be going in for this booze
keys in there or something for himto have keys that wouldn't mean he'd leave
(10:43):
the house at the remote. Theremote would be that would make sense.
No, no, no one's lookingfor anything. Yeah, some some quote
abnormal cells. Uh latex sense,So don't don't, don't, don't mess
with the late But then when youwear your late I guess not because it
(11:05):
doesn't give me a rash. Inever even like looked into that. You
didn't look into it. If youhave lis, I mean you're wearing leather
outfits, leather l You didn't lookinto that. I know, well psychotic.
Well here's the thing. I didn'torder outfits. So maybe maybe you
don't have Maybe maybe I'm over thisis the thing you've made up. Maybe
(11:26):
I do that. Well, butif I get a pedicure and that chick
puts on gloves like my feet willstart to itch and turn like red and
stuff. What do you do withdoctors and rubber gloves. I tell them
I'm latex sensitive, and they havespecial non latex. I don't believe they
made a vinyl. I don't believeyou. It's it's actually like a box.
You could. I think it's thething you made up in your head.
(11:46):
Though, I tell every doctor i'myou kind of think you're kind of
cooler because of it. Yeah,yeah, and I won't no condoms.
No, I'm I know, Iknow you don't so anyway, So so
what they want to do is,wait, real quick, is the boo
with you? No? Okay,just you know it's weird that he's not
Yeah, yeah, normal abnormal boobyeah nomo. Even even though you know
(12:13):
sky I live in Skytown. EvenI thought it would be a little much,
really to bring my husband to thegynecologist, to our like family physician.
No, like you think that's weird. Oh yeah, like he didn't
have a boner in the corner.That's so grum. Yeah, there's nothing
sexual about that that like no,no, no, not at all,
not at all. But as soonas like clothing items come off, he's
(12:35):
Robert yeah, oh yeah, ohyeah, he forgets where we're at.
He turns into the man Are youkidding me? Do you hear what you
just said? If you fucking yellor mouth? Yeah, seeing your boobs
in a very serious exam room situation, you're the boom. Yeah, you're
(12:56):
you're you're going to marry the boom. Yeah, you are a boob scare.
So like he's saying, oh yeah, during a boob scare. Yeah,
it's fucking so wild. It's Ican't I once it happened, I
didn't think about it like that,Like I just it was Robert being robber.
Yeah right, yeah, so yeah, so no boo with me.
(13:22):
I'm there, I'm their solo andI gotta go back. And the first
step in the appointment is they wantto do an ultrasound up in there right
there. And so for you guyswho may not realize how this works at
the office, they have a machine, an ultrasound sonogram machine. I don't
know whatever the term is. Andit basically is a fucking dildo. Like
(13:46):
that's literally what it looks like,big long, big long dildo looking thing.
And then they cover it in lubeand thens. No, I don't
track myself. She's a small littlevibrator, okay, a little pullet.
It's so cute. It's really cute. So they throw that bad boy up
(14:09):
inside of you. They have tolike have an attached to a rope so
that doesn't get lost in the twicewhen they're done. Is that the deal.
They don't have to have a rope, but it is attached there is
it's attached to the computer. Isthe doctor also tying a two by four
on its back? So okay,they don't fall in. Well why would
the doctor fall in? I meanthey're just it's not that big, it's
(14:33):
not that that was not in Thor'sdescription. Okay, a dive your helmet.
Okay, No one's wearing a divorhelmet. Okay. And it isn't
even my doctor who's doing this.It's like the nurse got this guy.
It just shows up, I gotit. Yeah, okay, how do
(14:56):
you look with that? All right? And has that he described? Of
course you gotta get on your backfeeding the stirrups and you so weird man,
here we go with the wad.Yeah. I mean I'm thankful they're
you know, they're very nice withit. They're very gentle and slow.
Yeah. I've had that happen acouple of times. They don't just ramming
(15:18):
it. Get ready. Then you'realways moist. Yeah, it's so true,
so true. So you know,of course I do my pleasantries with
the woman, like, hi,how are you like when we like when
we first meet, and then allof a sudden, how's your mother?
Great? Great? Great? Andthen you know, take off the pants,
(15:39):
do the stirrups and then she's startingthe thing and it's really quiet in
the room, as it should be. Yeah, she first of all,
she's doing work. I've had ultrasounds, not a wand up my dick,
but without ultrasounds where they're doing thething where they take the picture constantly.
It's not completely it's like doing thisand then they just click click. Yeah.
(16:03):
So yeah, like they're doing work. Yeah, I'm not going to
bother. They're looking their focus,they're actually looking for things and take it.
And if I got something inside me, I'm definitely not distracting with conversation.
Yeah. Well, so I wentthrough a lot of fertility treatments back
in the day, and this waspart of the process. So I've probably
had like a zillion of these Azillion, yeah, a zillion. Well,
(16:26):
I went through fertility stuff for likethree years, so it was like
going once a month and having thisdone, like oh yeah, because they
want to check your follicles, youreggs, blah blah blah blah blah.
Right, so I'm used to this. I know this chick does a zillion
of these every day. So we'retalking, We're going to have a conversation
because I can't handle it being quiet, Yeah, just like I can't handle
(16:48):
it being quiet in an uber.Okay. So I start talking to her
about how crazy this is full circle. You know. I used to become
in wanting to see things on thesescans. Now I'm coming in not wanting
to see things on these scans.And then we start talking about how how
because she seems like yeah, yeah, and she seems about my age,
(17:14):
right, and so we're talking aboutreally okay, sorry, about how things
have come, you know, fullcircles in life. And now, please
again, keep in mind there's awand up my vagina with her hand attached
(17:37):
to it during this whole conversation.I don't have a vagina, what okay?
Okay, I think, well,no, I mean we assume that
we know I don't have a vagina. Okay, we know that I can't
imagine that feels comfortable. No,I don't want to talk. I I've
(18:00):
had the butt hole exam. I'vehad a finger in my butt hole.
Okay. It's the worst feeling inthe world. Yeah, where you literally
go, Yeah, and I can'ttalk. Yeah. If I got a
giant deal though looking thing in myvagina, yeah, I don't know.
Maybe you know, yeah, becauseit's pretty roomy in there once you get
through the beginning. Oh you knowwhat I mean, it's like it opens
(18:22):
up to our cervix or one ofthose things. Right, is it comfortable?
It doesn't hurt. It's not thebest feeling in the world. It's
not don't know, I don't know. I don't have a vagina. I
mean, we have sex and thatfeels good. True, it doesn't feel
like a giant wand it's not inyour service. Okay, I'm not that.
(18:45):
I listen, Yeah, has agiant hawk, but I don't have
that kind of ze big. Idon't think. I don't know. You
don't know. I don't know whereit is. I don't have a vagina.
Yeah, it's wear at that daythat it would kind of almost be
like if you're using a Q tipin your ear and talking with somebody,
(19:11):
so like like you feel a littlebit of pressure, but it doesn't hurt
by any means. It's to carrya conversation. So we're having this conversation
and you're talking about circle. Well, so the full circle conversation continues,
and somehow she makes some comment abouthow people claim they're adulting now, and
(19:33):
that's a thing. And I startsaying about like how selfish you are when
you're younger, and then you finallybecome an adult and realize what a selfish
idiot you were as a child.And then I shared a story about how
I had to apologize to my mombecause one time I got mad at her
when we were little because she wassupposed to, well not little, but
like high school. She was supposedto drive me and my girlfriend's to the
(19:55):
mall, and she had the audacityto start having heart palpitations that day,
and so I literally got mad ather because she was having heart issues and
couldn't drive us to the mall.So, well, you're a fucking monster.
First of all, thank you.Like, like I mean, I've
heard some pretty bad things in mylife, nothing that bad. Like my
(20:15):
mom like never stayed in bed.She'd always be up at the cracks on.
She's in bed with heart palpitations,and I'm on the side of her
bed telling her how mean she isbecause she promised to take us to the
mall. You told this to acomplete stranger. Yes, I'm telling her
this as this is all going on. Well, there's a giant dildo in
Sky's ass. Click click, It'snot in my ass, it's in the
(20:40):
ass, Okay, but this isinsanity, Sky, Why would you?
I wouldn't tell anybody that story.First of all, if I were you
here on out, don't tell anybodythat story because it makes you look like
the biggest piece of shit on thePlanet's well, that was the point of
the story about the selfish as nobodyI've never met anybody, I mean,
(21:03):
Hitler, I think is like reallyreally, So that's insane first of all,
to share that while you're getting aninternal exam. Yes, is one
of the craziest things I've ever heardin my life. Yes. So she
decides that she has she's gonna share. She has a similar story as well.
She's sharing. How long is thisfucking by the way, thank you?
(21:26):
This is this is a four hourvisits. That's a lot of talk.
Yeah, there was. There wasa lot of wanding going on backstory.
There was a lot of wanding.Yeah you sure it's on your ass?
Positive? I'm positive. So that'swhen she decides she's going to share.
But she kicks off with her sharingto let me know how lucky I
(21:48):
am that I got to apologize becauseher mom is dead. She never Oh
my god, this story is over, this exam is over. I don't
that dude no more. I'm tappingout full circle
We have chronicled over the years.Yes, what an awkward human being Sky,
and how when she's in situations she'splaced into these situations, she can
make an awkward situation a million timesmore awkward with her awkward talk. I
don't know how she does it orwhy she can't avoid doing it. Sky,
(00:27):
Hi, guys, but somehow Skyhas made the uncomfortable gynecological visit even
more uncomfortable. We ain't done yet. It's time for the past, completely
uncensored and unacting filtered except for thatparty. The show's after show starts now.
(00:55):
Man, I don't know how youwomen do this. You spread your
legs open wide and have doctors diveinto your vaginas and like deep look around
and move around, and that's sobizarre. But you know that that system
in there is so strange, mystery, it really is. And also part
(01:18):
of that too, you know,you get a nice breast example too.
So you're laying there and they're like, they're all, oh, they're I
mean, like massaging every single part, like pinching the nipple a little bit,
all of that, and then you'rejust you're just laying there like Okay,
this is normal for this to happenright, Like us guys don't really
have much to say in that realm. Like we get our balls checked.
(01:42):
That's quick, little, it's aquick cough. How's your mother? You're
done? Okay, But we don'tspread our legs open wide and have somebody
jiggle them jerky off a little slapit around smash. Honestly, boy,
we don't have that. No.I forgot to tell you guys about something
(02:04):
that happened with me when I wasat the doctor really quick and involved the
breast exam, and I was thinkingabout Sky the whole time, because Sky
goes to the doctor sometimes with herhusband, which is very weird. And
I went to this appointment with Robertand I ended up having to get a
breast exam. Hold on a minute, Hold on a minute, huh,
what the fuck? Hold on hereabout this? For the first time,
(02:25):
Robert was in the exam room withyou. Yes, not the waiting room.
Oh no, no no no nono no no no no no no
no no no, no, nono no. We have destroyed this woman.
Yeah to me for having her husbandthe boo in the uh exam room
(02:46):
with her for a point. Nowthey have an appointment together which is psychotic,
which is next level to what you'resaying. But the point is they're
they're in the room together. Yes, you had Robert in the room with
you. Yes they're in an exam. But the reason was I had a
scare with my boob and I wantedit was like it was like, Nope,
I wanted somebody there to be with. Nope. You don't think that's
(03:06):
different. Nope. Oh I didn'teven think like I think it's Nope,
apples and orange, nope, becauseI wanted like it was a It was
scary. Like if you said hewent with you and was in the waiting
room. Yeah, totally get that. But the people is weird and you
are now in sky I am not. Yes you are because she's the mayor,
(03:27):
welcome to you are a resident,I'm the town. I am not
a resident. You are. Mostthe entire point of his appointment was to
look at the screen and have himshow me my ultrast. Did you did
you not get a breast example?I did, okay, but he could
be in there for two seconds ofit. It's weird. I thought it's
weird. But the guys, Itake my top off and I have to
do rest I'm sitting up upright.Oh I've never done sitting up on a
(03:49):
man. Okay, So Robert isin here watching another man fondle your breast.
Was that fondling? He is adoctor, Okay, but basically what's
happening touching around, feeling your nakedbreast? I didn't take that was the
thing. Oh, you are becauseof the terms of the appointment different,
unbelievable. Imagine that checkup be defined, it is, be defined. I
(04:11):
want it, I want it rightnow. Because you are. You are
a resident of sky crazy Town.Yes, you are very scary crazy anyway,
are the reason you can dance around. It's fucking weird. Let's say
I got some something weird going onwith my balls. Okay, weird,
(04:31):
but like, what about a cancerscary? Yeah? Yeah, they don't
have testicular cancer. My wife's notcoming in an examine. Really no fun
to look at the No. Iam a man, I'm not going I
can't handle my ship myself. I'ma grown up. And it comes in
now. If I have testicular cancerand they want to talk to us about
(04:53):
my procedures and things like that,yeah, okay, yeah, it's it's
not that's I understand having somebody thereas what do they call it, your
advocate, no nonation, somebody thereyou know who's going to follow along,
and I don't know, you know, because it's overwhelming. But that's not
what this was. That's not whatthis was. Well because normally what you're
describing, Eddie, that's a meetingin the doctor's like office, like an
(05:15):
office with the point not point example, another skywn I can't wait. You
want to go for a walk tomorrow, that's fine, go ahead and tattle.
I think would be would be anyway, we didn't go to the reason
I brought that up. I thinkI thought this is going to be like
a two minute thing. Just stopdown. This is delicious. It is
(05:41):
not what's going on. I donot I take your resident, I take
my top off. And that's whenRobert goes he mouths yeah and there doesn't
say it out loud. This thisisn't part of I don't think it was
(06:01):
gonna happen. But you went infor a breast example, I went in
to look at ultrasound and Robert mouthyeah in the doctor's say it out loud.
I sauth in the doctor, Yeah, that's not weird. I can't
(06:25):
wait to tell thor. Yeah,you can't wait because I can't wait because
he's gonna happen. If Haley hadthis, she'd want him to go in
there, and he'd go in Youdon't know that. I don't don't know
that. That's not what this isabout. Back to you Sky, Okay,
okay, it's about Sky making thingsweird in the doctor's office. But
(06:46):
Robert mouthing, yeah, it's notweird. Not to Emily. That's fine.
Up, there's the reason why youdidn't bring no, bring it up?
Okay, how would I bring itup? Now? Oh? My
town gets more populated everything, andI love it. You know, everyone's
(07:10):
well, we may we may havea new mayor'll give me a break,
give you a break? Stupid,is it? Oh wow, Well I'm
still the mayor, so without ajob. You are not being dethroned yet.
Yeah. So, even though Emily'sstory is wild, I feel so
(07:31):
crazy it is not. No,it isn't. Okay, my my experience
yesterday may be a little one upon on that. I just heard one
of the crazier things I've heard inthe long tw I know, and you're
telling me what you're about to tellme is crazier than that. I mean,
I guess a man in an examroom in a very serious situation,
(07:56):
serious mouthing yeah, seeing her cities. She's telling me that's crazy. All
right, right, well I thinkthat's crazy. But unless the boo was
in your gynecological office and like wasjerking off in the corner, I don't
know. I don't know anything.I'm gonna hear it's crazy. Wow.
Wow, Okay, Well you're fine. You gave me bathroom. This isn't
(08:22):
crazy. That's fine. Okay,Emily, what we got that? I
don't care. Yeah, I'll fightthe battle on my own. I don't
here. I'm one man, armyahead. I'm not participating. Oh really,
I'm not participating anywhere. Okay,I mean, shut up anything.
(08:48):
Oh you didn't mouth that, yousaid it. That's fine, that's totally
in a doctor's office. It's notnormal. That's why I brought it up.
Okay, not anyway. Wow,oh wow you guys. Wow,
Well yesterday my thing didn't involve mytitties. Oh okay, it involved my
(09:11):
vagina. Oh the clam not evercall it. That's not nice. I
mean, I've heard it describe fromthora who weirdly saw your vagina? Okay,
it was slick looking? Who isthat same? Didn't really? Or
he said like two slugs stuck togetherin a rainstorm. Okay, I don't
(09:35):
appreciate that. I don't appreciate thatit was glistening horse eating an apple sort
of. I don't appreciate that neither. I don't want any of these descriptions
swollen catchers, mit, I believeswollen You ever see a box full of
cow tongues? Yes, similar iswhat I believe. He said, none
(09:56):
of this. Well, I'll talkto your doctor when I go to your
next appointment. Ok thank you.Apparently everybody can go to doctor's. Okay,
you're gonna go in out of mouth? Yeah, okay, So yesterday
I had to go in because Ihad to get a little internal exam.
(10:22):
They wanted to look around at stuffbecause I had an abnormal PAP come back,
so they wanted a lot of informationthat I'm not sure I was ready
for. No, nobody was readyfor it. But you know, it
doesn't make sense any other way whyI would be going in for this booze
keys in there or something for himto have keys that wouldn't mean he'd leave
(10:43):
the house at the remote. Theremote would be that would make sense.
No, no, no one's lookingfor anything. Yeah, some some quote
abnormal cells. Uh latex sense,So don't don't, don't, don't mess
with the late But then when youwear your late I guess not because it
(11:05):
doesn't give me a rash. Inever even like looked into that. You
didn't look into it. If youhave lis, I mean you're wearing leather
outfits, leather l You didn't lookinto that. I know, well psychotic.
Well here's the thing. I didn'torder outfits. So maybe maybe you
don't have Maybe maybe I'm over thisis the thing you've made up. Maybe
(11:26):
I do that. Well, butif I get a pedicure and that chick
puts on gloves like my feet willstart to itch and turn like red and
stuff. What do you do withdoctors and rubber gloves. I tell them
I'm latex sensitive, and they havespecial non latex. I don't believe they
made a vinyl. I don't believeyou. It's it's actually like a box.
You could. I think it's thething you made up in your head.
(11:46):
Though, I tell every doctor i'myou kind of think you're kind of
cooler because of it. Yeah,yeah, and I won't no condoms.
No, I'm I know, Iknow you don't so anyway, So so
what they want to do is,wait, real quick, is the boo
with you? No? Okay,just you know it's weird that he's not
Yeah, yeah, normal abnormal boobyeah nomo. Even even though you know
(12:13):
sky I live in Skytown. EvenI thought it would be a little much,
really to bring my husband to thegynecologist, to our like family physician.
No, like you think that's weird. Oh yeah, like he didn't
have a boner in the corner.That's so grum. Yeah, there's nothing
sexual about that that like no,no, no, not at all,
not at all. But as soonas like clothing items come off, he's
(12:35):
Robert yeah, oh yeah, ohyeah, he forgets where we're at.
He turns into the man Are youkidding me? Do you hear what you
just said? If you fucking yellor mouth? Yeah, seeing your boobs
in a very serious exam room situation, you're the boom. Yeah, you're
(12:56):
you're you're going to marry the boom. Yeah, you are a boob scare.
So like he's saying, oh yeah, during a boob scare. Yeah,
it's fucking so wild. It's Ican't I once it happened, I
didn't think about it like that,Like I just it was Robert being robber.
Yeah right, yeah, so yeah, so no boo with me.
(13:22):
I'm there, I'm their solo andI gotta go back. And the first
step in the appointment is they wantto do an ultrasound up in there right
there. And so for you guyswho may not realize how this works at
the office, they have a machine, an ultrasound sonogram machine. I don't
know whatever the term is. Andit basically is a fucking dildo. Like
(13:46):
that's literally what it looks like,big long, big long dildo looking thing.
And then they cover it in lubeand thens. No, I don't
track myself. She's a small littlevibrator, okay, a little pullet.
It's so cute. It's really cute. So they throw that bad boy up
(14:09):
inside of you. They have tolike have an attached to a rope so
that doesn't get lost in the twicewhen they're done. Is that the deal.
They don't have to have a rope, but it is attached there is
it's attached to the computer. Isthe doctor also tying a two by four
on its back? So okay,they don't fall in. Well why would
the doctor fall in? I meanthey're just it's not that big, it's
(14:33):
not that that was not in Thor'sdescription. Okay, a dive your helmet.
Okay, No one's wearing a divorhelmet. Okay. And it isn't
even my doctor who's doing this.It's like the nurse got this guy.
It just shows up, I gotit. Yeah, okay, how do
(14:56):
you look with that? All right? And has that he described? Of
course you gotta get on your backfeeding the stirrups and you so weird man,
here we go with the wad.Yeah. I mean I'm thankful they're
you know, they're very nice withit. They're very gentle and slow.
Yeah. I've had that happen acouple of times. They don't just ramming
(15:18):
it. Get ready. Then you'realways moist. Yeah, it's so true,
so true. So you know,of course I do my pleasantries with
the woman, like, hi,how are you like when we like when
we first meet, and then allof a sudden, how's your mother?
Great? Great? Great? Andthen you know, take off the pants,
(15:39):
do the stirrups and then she's startingthe thing and it's really quiet in
the room, as it should be. Yeah, she first of all,
she's doing work. I've had ultrasounds, not a wand up my dick,
but without ultrasounds where they're doing thething where they take the picture constantly.
It's not completely it's like doing thisand then they just click click. Yeah.
(16:03):
So yeah, like they're doing work. Yeah, I'm not going to
bother. They're looking their focus,they're actually looking for things and take it.
And if I got something inside me, I'm definitely not distracting with conversation.
Yeah. Well, so I wentthrough a lot of fertility treatments back
in the day, and this waspart of the process. So I've probably
had like a zillion of these Azillion, yeah, a zillion. Well,
(16:26):
I went through fertility stuff for likethree years, so it was like
going once a month and having thisdone, like oh yeah, because they
want to check your follicles, youreggs, blah blah blah blah blah.
Right, so I'm used to this. I know this chick does a zillion
of these every day. So we'retalking, We're going to have a conversation
because I can't handle it being quiet, Yeah, just like I can't handle
(16:48):
it being quiet in an uber.Okay. So I start talking to her
about how crazy this is full circle. You know. I used to become
in wanting to see things on thesescans. Now I'm coming in not wanting
to see things on these scans.And then we start talking about how how
because she seems like yeah, yeah, and she seems about my age,
(17:14):
right, and so we're talking aboutreally okay, sorry, about how things
have come, you know, fullcircles in life. And now, please
again, keep in mind there's awand up my vagina with her hand attached
(17:37):
to it during this whole conversation.I don't have a vagina, what okay?
Okay, I think, well,no, I mean we assume that
we know I don't have a vagina. Okay, we know that I can't
imagine that feels comfortable. No,I don't want to talk. I I've
(18:00):
had the butt hole exam. I'vehad a finger in my butt hole.
Okay. It's the worst feeling inthe world. Yeah, where you literally
go, Yeah, and I can'ttalk. Yeah. If I got a
giant deal though looking thing in myvagina, yeah, I don't know.
Maybe you know, yeah, becauseit's pretty roomy in there once you get
through the beginning. Oh you knowwhat I mean, it's like it opens
(18:22):
up to our cervix or one ofthose things. Right, is it comfortable?
It doesn't hurt. It's not thebest feeling in the world. It's
not don't know, I don't know. I don't have a vagina. I
mean, we have sex and thatfeels good. True, it doesn't feel
like a giant wand it's not inyour service. Okay, I'm not that.
(18:45):
I listen, Yeah, has agiant hawk, but I don't have
that kind of ze big. Idon't think. I don't know. You
don't know. I don't know whereit is. I don't have a vagina.
Yeah, it's wear at that daythat it would kind of almost be
like if you're using a Q tipin your ear and talking with somebody,
(19:11):
so like like you feel a littlebit of pressure, but it doesn't hurt
by any means. It's to carrya conversation. So we're having this conversation
and you're talking about circle. Well, so the full circle conversation continues,
and somehow she makes some comment abouthow people claim they're adulting now, and
(19:33):
that's a thing. And I startsaying about like how selfish you are when
you're younger, and then you finallybecome an adult and realize what a selfish
idiot you were as a child.And then I shared a story about how
I had to apologize to my mombecause one time I got mad at her
when we were little because she wassupposed to, well not little, but
like high school. She was supposedto drive me and my girlfriend's to the
(19:55):
mall, and she had the audacityto start having heart palpitations that day,
and so I literally got mad ather because she was having heart issues and
couldn't drive us to the mall.So, well, you're a fucking monster.
First of all, thank you.Like, like I mean, I've
heard some pretty bad things in mylife, nothing that bad. Like my
(20:15):
mom like never stayed in bed.She'd always be up at the cracks on.
She's in bed with heart palpitations,and I'm on the side of her
bed telling her how mean she isbecause she promised to take us to the
mall. You told this to acomplete stranger. Yes, I'm telling her
this as this is all going on. Well, there's a giant dildo in
Sky's ass. Click click, It'snot in my ass, it's in the
(20:40):
ass, Okay, but this isinsanity, Sky, Why would you?
I wouldn't tell anybody that story.First of all, if I were you
here on out, don't tell anybodythat story because it makes you look like
the biggest piece of shit on thePlanet's well, that was the point of
the story about the selfish as nobodyI've never met anybody, I mean,
(21:03):
Hitler, I think is like reallyreally, So that's insane first of all,
to share that while you're getting aninternal exam. Yes, is one
of the craziest things I've ever heardin my life. Yes. So she
decides that she has she's gonna share. She has a similar story as well.
She's sharing. How long is thisfucking by the way, thank you?
(21:26):
This is this is a four hourvisits. That's a lot of talk.
Yeah, there was. There wasa lot of wanding going on backstory.
There was a lot of wanding.Yeah you sure it's on your ass?
Positive? I'm positive. So that'swhen she decides she's going to share.
But she kicks off with her sharingto let me know how lucky I
(21:48):
am that I got to apologize becauseher mom is dead. She never Oh
my god, this story is over, this exam is over. I don't
that dude no more. I'm tappingout full circle
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