Using the bathroom while travelling

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
You know those kinds of.

Speaker 2 (00:03):
Those kinds of things that I was just talking to
you about or something I think everybody can relate to.
And uh, I like once upon a time when I
was working in Cincinnati, and I'm talking to Chuck by
the way, because you might be staring at the radio
right now, going, I don't hear.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
Anybody else just started. He wasn't talking to me.

Speaker 1 (00:25):
Who the hell's he talking to?

Speaker 3 (00:27):
Mark's having an episode.

Speaker 1 (00:28):
Someone called someone, Someone calls someone.

Speaker 2 (00:32):
I love it. That's a bumper sticker. I think dot
dot someone call someone with an exclamation point after the
second someone. But I when I worked in Cincinnati and
in radio down there is iHeart down in Cincinnati. I
had to the point where, like every major exit between

(00:55):
here and there, I knew exactly where the best slash
cleanest restrooms were for obvious reasons, and because I would
drive back and forth, I was doing that a lot
at once upon a time. So you can imagine my
horror today as I'm driving out to the east Side
and I'm in unfamiliar territory, going, uh oh, I hope

(01:16):
I can make it to where I'm going. So that's
what that's what part of my day started with but
you'll be happy to know that I still have on
the same clothes.

Speaker 1 (01:26):
Looks like he made it.

Speaker 2 (01:30):
And then I told Jago, you know, getting old sucks,
but a lot of people can relate to what I
just said. I guarantee it, and you know, I mean
I something that everybody has to deal with, I guess at.

Speaker 1 (01:44):
Some point or other.

Speaker 2 (01:46):
And then you know when also you start factoring in
when you're going to go on vacation, are we going
to drive or are we going to fly?

Speaker 1 (01:55):
Because then you go, man, if we got to.

Speaker 3 (01:57):
Drive, it's map the risk ups have.

Speaker 1 (02:01):
To stop and those are by the way.

Speaker 2 (02:04):
As far as the rest stops go, I usually drive
right past those, like well, like a dummy, because I'm
looking for a McDonald's or and I never learned my
lesson because having young ones, having kids, you want to
try to avoid going it because you're gonna be stuck
spending at least twenty bucks if you know, depending on
what it is, what restaurant you're going to. But typically

(02:26):
they have cleaner bathrooms. Now I statypically, I mean sometimes
they don't, depending on but those, excuse me, those rest stops,
some of them looks like bathrooms out of Saul. Remember
the movie Saw. I mean, it's so scary, it's like, no,
I don't want to be any I don't want to
be anywhere near that.

Speaker 3 (02:44):
I always try to find a gas station on a
country road, or there's an attendant sitting outside with no teeth. Boy,
I know the bathroom is clean, and uh no, just kidding,
being tainted. Living on my beloved West Side, bathrooms are
few and far between. Peeing is almost illegal a couple
of zip codes on the West side of Columbus now,
so I'm kind of paranoid that that may be the

(03:05):
case in other cities. And if I stop at the
gas station or the McDonald's or whatever, no public restrooms. Well,
if I gotta go, I gotta go right. And if
i'm if I once I once I leave the driver's
seat and begin motion towards the porcelain, there must be porcelain,
otherwise we're going to have a problem. And the rest stops,

(03:25):
I know I'm gonna have the bathroom there. I'm I
always worry I'm gonna get off at an exit and
they're gonna say no public restrooms.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
Yeah, and that that's a normal occurrence on the West Side,
isn't it.

Speaker 3 (03:35):
Oh yeah, And that's.

Speaker 2 (03:38):
Is that mainly because people are going in there doing
drugs or whatever anything, but using the facilities for what
they're designed for.

Speaker 3 (03:46):
Now, some of the places, the little corner stores and
stuff where I go, they know me. So if I'm desperate,
I'm like, dude, I need the key, Okay, no problem,
and he'll toss me the key. But for the most part, yeah,
I mean there's there's nothing available, even the core change,
the UDF stores and EPs, and so they have no
public access, which is a shame because, as I've said before,

(04:08):
even in Columbus city parks, if you take your kid
to a city park after October, when they pull a
little porta potties out, yeah, or your grandkid, you know,
grandpa's there with the kids, you gotta go. Well, you're
gonna have to say, come on, kids, time to go home,
because you can't even go. That's silly. This is a
basic human function. It's silly. You don't have access to

(04:29):
what you need access.

Speaker 1 (04:30):
And what it sucks.

Speaker 2 (04:31):
What sucks about that is other people have ruined it
for people who really are going in.

Speaker 1 (04:36):
There to use the bathroom, not shoot up or whatever.
Else is going on.

Speaker 3 (04:40):
I can't get a porter potty at the park, but
we got two million dollars in potties in downtown Columbus
for homeless people.

Speaker 2 (04:45):
I don't get it right. Yeah, I kid you. Not
on the way to Pittsburgh somewhere in that's a main
My wife would remember if she's listening, but she's off
today and she's not listening. But I'm telling you, man,
there it was on the way. It was on the
way to Pittsburgh. And I'm telling you man, I was
doing the dance like it was. It was bad and

(05:08):
not the number one dance. I was like, oh boy,
oh boy. So I finally pull into this place and
I go up and they're like, no, no restrooms and
I was just like, I'm in a bad way here,
and they were like, I'm sorry, you can't use And
I said, I pulled twenty bucks out and I said,
I got twenty bucks.

Speaker 1 (05:26):
It says I can use and they.

Speaker 2 (05:27):
Handed me the ke absolutely twenty bucks, And when I left,
I actually went online. Later that night, when we were
in Pittsburgh, I went online and started trying to find
a way to file a complaint against that company. And
it was just Sonoko. I believe it was this is
a sonoco and I was trying to figure out to go,

(05:48):
how dare you do that?

Speaker 3 (05:50):
Where?

Speaker 2 (05:50):
But I was at that point I would have given
a hundred. I mean, it was just like, I'm like
it was bad.

Speaker 3 (05:56):
I was like, oh, conditions in the bathroom, don't eat
even matter. If you gotta go, you gotta go.

Speaker 1 (06:02):
I think it was just started met foreman and you.

Speaker 3 (06:05):
Know what I mean too, And I'm good now, like
I just would like go through me. Oh yes, as
soon as I ate, I'm like, what is that?

Speaker 2 (06:14):
And you're like, I gotta go now, and by the way,
right and when it goes brew you're on the clock,
like you go, okay, I probably got maybe half an
hour wrong, you got about three minutes, yep, because it
goes and the next one, the next noise you hear
is either gonna be you going.

Speaker 3 (06:29):
Oh that's the thing. It's not evident because I mean
all your life you've had the little stomach gurgle or something. Yeah,
I better find a bathroom here ready. So no, it's
the same feeling man getting holds, but the feeling is
quickly resolving itself and you don't have that time element anymore.

Speaker 1 (06:47):
Hey, Kevin, welcome to the show.

Speaker 4 (06:49):
Hey, thanks, how's it going?

Speaker 1 (06:50):
Hey doing? Good man? Thank you? How you doing?

Speaker 3 (06:52):
Kevin's all happy because we're talking. Pooh pooh. You can
hear him smile on his voice, in his face.

Speaker 4 (06:57):
I wanted to know if you ever saw the movie right.

Speaker 1 (07:00):
Stop, No, who does it matter? Who's in that?

Speaker 3 (07:04):
Or you're just yeah, it's.

Speaker 4 (07:07):
A bunch of no name right. My wife and I
watched it like twenty five years ago, and there's this
like serial killer that lives in the rest stop and
this couple, this couple stops and it's it's the whole
movie of them trying to get away from this guy.
And it is. It is a wild, wild movie.

Speaker 2 (07:31):
Sounds like a quality motion picture lurking behind the vending machines.

Speaker 1 (07:37):
Yeah, did they get away? You can do spoiler alert?
Did they get away? Or did they get him?

Speaker 5 (07:43):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (07:43):
No, he got him?

Speaker 1 (07:44):
He got him? Oh man, yeah, bummer, yeah.

Speaker 3 (07:48):
God, there are some freaks at rest stops by the way.
Just yeah, there's a question, no doubt about that question
about that.

Speaker 5 (07:54):
Yeah, go look it up.

Speaker 4 (07:56):
And it's it's pretty pretty violent.

Speaker 1 (07:58):
Gross rest stop. Okay, I'll check it out.

Speaker 3 (08:02):
The sequel was The Texas Rest Stop, Mexico. A lot
of people might remember that it had nothing to do
with violence. It was that met Foreman thing, which you.

Speaker 2 (08:10):
Know, which is basically like a chainsaw ripping through your
gi tracted.

Speaker 1 (08:15):
Let's just be honest.

Speaker 3 (08:17):
We stopped it when I can't eve. It was somewhere
here in the state of Ohio when I had My
sons were young teenagers and uh and uh he said, Dad,
I got to go ahead, I'll be out here. He
goes in and uh, I hear Dad, And I'm that's
all I needed, man, I'm I'm right in there. And
there's some guy. I said, what's going on? He goes

(08:37):
he wants to know my name in a bathroom and
my son was like twelve. Yeah, I knew this was wrong. Yeah,
he said, he asked me what my name was. We're
in a bathroom. Yeah. And the guy exited very quickly
because he was not a very large man.

Speaker 2 (08:51):
And I was, yeah, hey, man, that's that is man,
that's freaky. I hate here stuff like that. Hey don
welcome to the show.

Speaker 4 (08:59):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (08:59):
I would say, ways in that category of what oh okay.
And they're never for use because it's not deserved, not ready.
It's just the staff doesn't want to claim them.

Speaker 2 (09:13):
Yeah, oh you know what, and thanks don or. Now
are we getting to like the McDonald's.

Speaker 1 (09:19):
Ice cream machine thing? Only be it's just like the bathroom.

Speaker 3 (09:22):
First them up that thing in twenty nineteen. We ain't
going back in.

Speaker 2 (09:27):
That could be a part of their like, no, we
got them cleaned up. Uh, yeah, they're out of order.
I mean, what are you gonna say if the door
is locked and they tell you they're out of order
or there's a sign on there, you go, you're lying.

Speaker 3 (09:38):
The thing is I think in Columbus, I believe it's
an ordinance that if you are open to the public here,
you're supposed to have publicly accessible facilities. I thought so too,
and I can't believe nobody has ever challenged this. When
you've got you know, blocks and blocks and blocks of
all these stores and so forth that don't have those. Look,
they're gonna cite you if the paint's peeling on your house.

(09:59):
They might as well site these places that aren't allowing
you to go in there and use a bathroom.

Speaker 2 (10:02):
Yeah, you'd think absolutely, Yeah, you'd think. Man, hey, first
day of summer solstices tomorrow night. I'm pretty excited about
that ten forty two pm. But we can have more
of a well, it's going to be fifteen hours I
think of daylight tomorrow wow, roughly something like that. So
that's pretty exciting. Something else some of the headlines here,

(10:25):
the White House has put out a statement basically say,
and I saw it during the press the press or
earlier with Caroline Levitt, A decision on Iran in the
next two weeks is what they're saying.

Speaker 3 (10:38):
Now.

Speaker 1 (10:39):
So, decision on Iran in the next two weeks. Here's
the thing. He probably he can make.

Speaker 2 (10:44):
Think about this, he can make He even said, I
make the decision right before we're doing it, you know,
so in the next two weeks could mean you know tonight,
I mean that's technically in the next.

Speaker 3 (10:53):
Two weeks, you know so, And basically all he's saying
is I've already made my decision Iran. You have two
weeks to either clean up to your act and come
to some sort of agreement with Israel or not.

Speaker 2 (11:04):
Yep, yep, absolutely, so those are That's like kind of
the bigger headline today was the decision on Iran in
the next two weeks.

Speaker 3 (11:11):
I want to support Israel, I mean, and I think
we are called upon that both biblically and politically to
do so. However, I don't want us in a war either.
So it's it's one of those things where if we've
got to give them rockets, missiles, jets, whatever they need, Okay,
I'm good with that. But unless Iran comes after us
or one of our allies, I really pray we stay

(11:34):
out of this.

Speaker 1 (11:35):
Well, that's where you're here.

Speaker 2 (11:36):
People say, well, they're behind trying to assassinate Trump, and
so I don't know, can you one thousand percent prove that?

Speaker 1 (11:43):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (11:43):
The other part is really they are always after us.
It's just we have what the what was the term
that I heard? It was we have ocean privilege.

Speaker 4 (11:56):
You know.

Speaker 2 (11:56):
I heard somebody say that, which I kind of chuckled because, oh, oh,
I guess that's true too, but saying, look, if we
were their neighbors, but you know, not only do they
destabilize that whole area.

Speaker 1 (12:08):
Let's face it, it's part of the world.

Speaker 2 (12:10):
So it'd be in our best interest to make sure
that to help out here, that they do not have
any availability to any kind of you know nuclear weapons.
But the other part of this is there one thousand
do we have receipts for sure that the uranium is there?
It's several hundred feet down the way that it's being

(12:30):
portrayed right now. And look, if I know it all
the way here in Ohio, a little podunk Columbus, do
you think that they really have it there? I mean,
that's pretty easy if I've heard that and they've got
the coordinates. Is this another weapons of mass destructions?

Speaker 1 (12:46):
That's where that's.

Speaker 2 (12:47):
Kind of the narrative right now, which you start thinking
about that, but it's like, man, you probably need to
take probably need to take a swing at it if
if you know, there's pretty good intelligence that indicates it. Such,
let's go back to the bathroom thing. That's what happens.
We have people, you know, calling in, but I do
want to get to the calls because I appreciate you
calling and listening. Hey, Dwight, welcome in.

Speaker 5 (13:07):
Hey, thank you. I have the ultimate place to go
when I'm out traveling, which I travel a lot. I
look for an office building because they're always super clean.
There's hardly anybody ever in there, and sometimes they're even
playing music in the best.

Speaker 1 (13:23):
You get a soundtrack. I love it.

Speaker 3 (13:25):
Welcome to music. Here's for those of you that ate
too much beef last night.

Speaker 2 (13:36):
Dwight, you are you are flat brilliant, my man. I'm
going to tell you, Dwight, that is just brilliant.

Speaker 3 (13:42):
Office buildings are good if it's.

Speaker 5 (13:44):
Traveling for thirty years. So I figured that out real quick.

Speaker 1 (13:48):
Man.

Speaker 2 (13:48):
That is beautiful. Thanks man, Holy cow, that was amazing.
Everybody listening, you're welcome because Dwight just get you.

Speaker 1 (13:57):
Get charged for that.

Speaker 3 (13:58):
Office buildings all over America right now are going, oh
hell no, ha no, just stay in your car, keep going.

Speaker 1 (14:04):
But he's right. You got multiple businesses in his office buildings.
You just walk in.

Speaker 2 (14:08):
There's going to be a main bathroom, right and no
one's gonna go, excuse me, which place are you going to?
Nobody cares that works there. They're all gonna think, well,
he's going to the other place. If he's not coming,
you know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (14:20):
It's like, man, that is perfect, so good, so good,