Accountability + Gratitude. Spreading Joy. No Negative Nancy. Positivity in a Pandemic.

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Okay, cap little food for you so life. Oh it's
pretty Bay, It's pretty beautiful than that. A little moth

(00:29):
kicking four brown. Happy there day, everybody. Thanks for checking
out the podcast today and today's episode. I hope you
are having a great week. For the first thing, today,
I get into just something that I've been struggling with
lately and I need your help with. So Chase joins
me for that thing, and I'll just tell you that
this whole episode covers a lot of gratitude and joy

(00:51):
and positivity, especially with the guests that I have on.
I have my friend Britney Spencer back on, but this
time she is with her grandma and they're just sharing
their conversation with us. I had Brittany sit down with
her grandma and talk about the inspiration that she's been
to her and how she's had such a positive impact
and her outlook on life, and I just feel like

(01:12):
there is such a richness in having a conversation with
someone like a grandma, and Brittany is just the coolest.
I hope you all can check her out on Instagram
at Britney Spencer and download her song Compassion because it
is just so good and we need compassion everywhere in
the world right now, even compassion with ourselves. My friend
Lisa at the Well Necessities is on for the third thing,

(01:35):
and we're going to talk about negative nancy and how
powerful our thoughts are and how we need to kind
of say goodbye to the negative nancy part of our thoughts.
And for the fourth thing, I've got Morgan number two
on from the Bobby Bones Show. Super excited to have
her on the podcast and get her perspective as a
young twenty six year old single lives alone trying to

(01:59):
navigate pandemic and what she's doing in her life to
make sure that she's continuing to do things that make
her happy and bring her joy. So yeah, that's the
theme of today's episode. I just don't want to say
thank you to anyone and everyone that bought a calm
Down tea for Stevenson's birthday. We're able to make a
big impact to the orphanage in Haiti because of your support,

(02:22):
So thank you very much. I just appreciate y'all so
so much. All Right, here's today's episode. First, Okay, So
for the first thing, I've got Chase on and we're
going to talk about accountability partners, because I started to
wonder if accountability partners really work. And I know that
I need to get back into the groove of practicing gratitude,

(02:44):
which is ironic because Mary and I came up with
a gratitude journal for this very thing, a four things
gratitude journal, so simple. We were intimidated by journaling, so
we thought, well, we can part gratitude. We can write
things down if we just make this simple journal. And
we did it, and we did a gratitude challenge and
it was so awesome, and I was held accountable by

(03:05):
you guys listening, our community, by Mary chap Spoa people.
We were all in it together. And I have slowly
but surely done it less and less. I don't do
it every day, and I'm admitting that right now. But
I want to get back on the gratitude course because
I keep seeing everywhere I turn how amazing it is,

(03:26):
and I do want to experience true joy, just to
be honest, like, there's just a lot going on in
my life. I don't like being totally I don't want
to call it fake, but there's some things I'm just
not that are not for public right, So I'm not
going to come on here and talk about things, but
I feel like I can be a little bit genuine
and feel safe enough to say that we never know

(03:48):
what's going on in anybody's life on any given day.
Just say that for everybody, And I feel like as
though right now I'm having to put on a tough
front a lot of the days, and Chase knows a
little bit about that. And I'm not saying it for
you to feel any particular way about me, but only
so that you can know that I understand fully that
you guys might be going through a lot and you

(04:10):
may need that encouragement and accountability to make sure that
you're taking time for yourself to do the right thing
to keep your body, brain, mind, soul, everything mentally healthy.
And I think that gratitude is such a simple thing
that can really deliver such positive results and and true joy.
So back to accountability partners. I didn't know if it

(04:32):
really mattered, but I just type into Google do accountability
partners work? And it's said here, Even though most people
avoid it, accountability works, it really works. Actually, if you
do not measure and report your progress, then you're probably
not making much progress at all. However, having a specific
accountability partner increases your chance of success to So I

(04:54):
am here proclaiming that I am going to get back
into the groove of gratitude because I need that. I
need to take note of the things that I am
thankful for so I don't get stuck in the other stuff.
And I hope that y'all will be my accountability partners.
I know that Mary will be in on it. Maybe
she'll bust out her journal with me too. She's probably

(05:15):
better at me keeping up with it than I am. Chase,
are you in okay? Thank you? I know I gotta
get you on here to just make sure you commit
to being in with us. But I feel like we
can all do this together. And really, I, speaking of Google,
started looking up activities to be joyful or activities that
create joy, and there's all these different suggestions that pop

(05:39):
up from various websites, and most of them, the first
thing it starts with is have a good gratitude practice.
This one website in particular is called life hack dot org,
which I don't think that you can like hack your
way to joy by any means, But I was going
to share with you all different things that could possibly
make you happy and help you enjoy life more. But again,

(06:02):
just like a lot of other places, starts off with gratitude.
It says, start with a good dose of gratitude. Make
sure you're giving back. Laugh every day, foster good relationships
with family and friends, spend time alone. I love that one.
Do what you love, Volunteer your time, get enough exercise.
So you may not be able to check off all
of those things, but the gratitude thing. If you, especially

(06:24):
if you have one of our journals busted out. If
you don't have one of ours, get out a piece
of paper or any all notebook and start writing down
four things that you're thankful for. Tie it into your phone.
I am here to be your accountability partner, each and
every one of you. And Chase and I were talking
before we started recording. You know when it says here
one of the suggestions was laugh every day. And I know, Chase,

(06:44):
you were telling me that you've started watching Golden Girls
or something. I just discovered the Golden Girls, yeah, which
I think is amazing and is a great reminder to
me that I need to probably watch me some Golden
Girls because I love that show. I used to watch
Friends on Netflix to make me laugh because it's hilarious
to me. But Netflix took it away and out's on

(07:05):
HBO Max, which is something I'm not thankful for because
I don't have HBO Max. But I am thankful for
the Office that's still on Netflix and makes me laugh.
And I do love me some Golden Girls, So I
need to make sure that I bust that out. That's
some like good, solid, healthy humor that is so opposite
of negativity, you bet. I picked up my journal a

(07:26):
week ago just because I was kind of in a slump,
and I feel like I'm someone who constantly is reflecting
on things I'm grateful for. But there really is like
power and writing it down and looking at it and
seeing it in front of you. And also on days
you might really be struggling to even like flip back
a few pages and see all the things that you've
been blessed with before. And so I just encourage people

(07:48):
because sometimes I was someone who thought, well, me just
recognizing that gratitude and not thinking that to myself was enough.
But there really is value in writing it down and
reflecting on it, you know. And I've got a figure
out what do I go back to Instagram posting every
day so that you'll we can be an accountability with
each other, and y'all were y'all were doing it too

(08:08):
and posting using hashtag four things gratitude or at Radio
a Me that's my Instagram, or at shop Espoix. I
run that account too, So I don't know what this
is going to look like, but I see better results
when I see that on Google. We gotta do this,
like we have to. I need it. I'm sure a
lot of you out there listening need it. And I

(08:29):
know we've done a lot of different episodes with things
that talk about this very thing. But it's that important.
I just thought we'd come on and address it, but
with a twist of accountability. And maybe the online community
is not that. Maybe it's that you call a friend
like Chase here. I know that now he's going to
hold me accountable and I'll do the same for you, Chase.
But maybe it's that you send your friend a text

(08:51):
like Chase, I should maybe text you like, hey, you
watch Golden Girls Lately as a nudge a reminder to
do that, and then you can watch it and then
go to your Gratitude journal and say I'm thankful for
Golden Girls. And another thing you'd be thankful for is
that I texted you to remind you to watch it.
I mean, see how easy this is to just start
to recognize the little things they do. And you know,

(09:12):
sometimes there might be really big things that are obviously
so amazing, but you know, I think that it's the
little things that you'll look back on and they can
have a pretty big impact as well. And that was
honestly Mary and I's goal and wanting to start to
keep track is that we could look back take in
all the different things we were thankful for in that

(09:33):
particular journal or whatever you're writing your stuff down in,
So let's do it. Accountability. Whatever it is that you're
trying to do. Maybe you got the gratitude thing down,
you don't need my help. Maybe it's something else that
you want to do and do well and succeed at.
Find yourself an accountability partner, because I think it's important. Grandma,

(09:58):
pretty thank you so much for for doing this. I
feel like I've been interviewing you for years and uh
and now we get to do a podcast together, so
that's really fun. All right, Okay, Grandma, is something I
haven't told you is that you know how we talk
on the phone quite a bit. A lot of times

(10:18):
I record our conversations. Sometimes I figured you did because
I want to go with them and hear them again. It. Oh, Grandma,
I've been doing that for years. I feel like you
always give me so much wisdom and so much encouragement.
Um and I feel like you see things about myself

(10:38):
that I don't see, UM and so, and I'm always
I'm always grateful for that, and so sometimes I just
want to hear them again because it sounds good to me.
I know why you did it. You never had to
tell me that. I always suspect that you did so
that you could listen to them over because I could
tell sometimes you said, wait a minute, hold on a minute.

(10:59):
I want them to hear really what you're saying. So,
you know, it just kind of popped in my mind
a couple of times. But I'm okay with it because
I wouldn't say anything online that I wouldn't say to
your face. That's how I am, Grandma. I ain't gonna
say nothing about somebody behind their back online that wouldn't
say to their face. Um. Well, Grandma, you are You

(11:20):
are a very faith filled person and you have, um,
you have a lot of joy. I know, I know
quite a bit about your life story, just the things
that you've shared with me over the years and UM,
just the idea that you find a way to maintain joy.
It's always, um, it's it's the most beautiful thing I've seen.

(11:42):
There was a story you were telling me about the
other day when I asked, you said, Grandma, how do
you maintain joy? And you told me this story about um. Oh,
you told me that in order for you to keep joy,
you do the things that you actually want to do.
And you told me about the story, um of the
first time you realize, So you didn't know what you wanted?
Do you do you okay to share that? Well? Yes,

(12:04):
that bubble. That was during a time when all the
kids had gotten grown. My whole life was in taking
care of my brothers and sisters, my mother. I was
the oldest of seven. I did all the cooking and
my parents work. I did the washing, but I was
always in the caretaker position. I got married, I just
want a husband to be loved and have children. That

(12:25):
was my only goal because that's what was in me.
To take care to cook them and help people, but
all life changes, and people change their minds and through
the struggles. So one day they all got grown and
they all were gone from home, and I was so
excited to have my house to myself. I didn't have
to worry my clean up behind nobody. I could go
to the market and get what I wanted to eat.

(12:47):
All I would just so have. I went to the market,
got inside the market door on the floor, just looked
around all there's counters and the cupboards and the rows
of food. And I stopped and I realized that I
didn't know what I wanted to eat. I didn't know
what I liked. I cooked hamburgers and gravy and master

(13:09):
tatoes and green bee, I fried chicken, make macaron and
chicken collar, green corn bread, homemade rolls, all of that.
And I realized I ain't liked the food that I
had fixed my kids all those years. I miss wasn't
that it was nothing wrong with it. It It was good,
but I didn't like that kind of cooking. And I
didn't know that. So I stood there, not realizing what

(13:29):
I wanted. I started to cry. I went to the
all and got my talllet paper. I knew my household
stuff and got in the car, and I said, and
I cried a while, and I realized what had happened
to me down through the years. I had gave all
of me away. I had gave mother's wife's sister, cousin,

(13:49):
uh grandma. All of me was gone. And I was crying.
I said, Lord, when did I lose Mary? When did
I lose myself? And doing what I thought was good
for me? And I realized that after raising my children,
I didn't know what I like to eat. I didn't
wear makeup, I didn't know how to put them. I

(14:10):
didn't have ear rings. I didn't know nothing. So I
begin to One day at a time, I went back
to the market, and then I just looked around. I
found out I like little cuisines. I did never cook
spaghetti meatballs for my children. I found out that I
loved spaghetti and meatballs. I made macaroni and cheese, I

(14:32):
made hamburgers, patties, and I made me low but I
never made a meat ball. And I was just trying things,
and and I loved those meatballs and putting cheese or
so many different things, the same types of food, but
I was cooking it in a different way, and little
portions of little things of rice and little things of
neods and Chinese food and stuffing. I never had a

(14:56):
pizza in my life, and really until I got grown,
I didn't. I mean, that was something I couldn't afford.
So it's never enough when I reached for so if
it was meat, and so I made it for my
children in a big way, was okay that pepperoni? So
I really never had a pepperoni. Well, here I am
in my forties and I'm eating my first pizza. I

(15:20):
love them. I love That's like Papa Johns, I like
lead those. I love it. That's so funny to hear, Grandma,
because like literally that's like kids favorite food. So something
something that's always been so present in my life, wasn't
the norm for you until you were older than I
am right now. Yes, And so when I listened to

(15:45):
you talk about finding out what it is that you
actually want to do and finding out the things that
you actually like to do in life and how that
contributes to the joy that you have. That's something that
I take away just as like just as your grandchild,
I it means a lot to me to have people
around me, to have elders around me, who who know

(16:07):
what they want and who know who they are. It
pushes me to want to know who I am and
to to to always push to know what it is
that I actually want to do. Because as I hear
you talk doing what you want to do, to me,
that sounds it sounds like a purposeful life. It sounds
like a very intentional life. It sounds like taking control
of your life and not just letting life happen to you.

(16:30):
Um and just keep what you said, not letting life
happen to you. In nineteen seventy five, I had four kids,
no husband, raised them all by myself, as every since
nineteen seventy something, well seventy two, Chucky was born, and
three years later, in nineteen seventy five, I saw the

(16:51):
Corocophe homeless people and didn't know what I was doing.
I just knew that I had couldn't afford Thanksgiving dinner.
So when I could afford one if my four kids,
I cooked twice. I said, Lord, I'm gonna cook food
exactly the way I cooking for myself, but I'm gonna
give half of the way to homeless people. And we
didn't have homeless people like we have today and groups.

(17:13):
I sent my son, your uncle to the curb on
the place where we live, and I said, go down
on that corner, and you tell anybody said, my mother
cooked Thanksgiving dinner. Do you want a dinner? I have
been cooking homeless food. The last time we was out
before the pandemic hit, I served a hundred and ten dinners.
We had chops turkey where you know how I cook

(17:35):
all the food and been cooking that. It's been over
forties forty four years now. And you taught us that too, Girlma,
you took us around as kids for Thanksgiving. We were
all getting cars and we would hand out plates of food.
We would just drive around just like the inner city
where we knew there were a lot of homeless people,
and we would just pass our food to people, to

(17:56):
just anybody, and we would You you always taught us
also to do things with quality. So we had the
paper plate, we had the food. We had. It was
wrapped up and foil. But you told us, you said,
make sure you put a napkin, a fork, a knife,
a spoon in there. And then we put it in
a like a grocery bag and tied it up and
then we gave. I think we used to give them
like bottles of drinks or something like that. So you

(18:19):
you told us to to take pride in and you
didn't just put stuff together. You've You've made plates for
people who are less fortunate, the same way you would
make a plate for me. So, Grandma, we've got just
a few minutes I want to take. I want to
take the last part of our segment one to thank
you for being here and for doing this. UM thinking
about Grandma, I'm thankful for you because, UM, I feel

(18:43):
like so many people in our family are worried about
me sometimes being so far from home because I'm a woman.
I feel like you make me feel empowered to be
a woman when I when I hear you tell the
stories about the restaurant that you owned, about how even
in your seventies now and you still you teach, You
go to your local school and you're you're a teacher. Um,

(19:05):
you still feed the homeless. UM, you do so much.
You still teach Sunday school. You so many people depending
on you for so much, and you just show up.
You show up for people, and it makes me want
to show up for people more than a singer more
than anything, any task I could do, any school I
could have. I really want to be a good person

(19:26):
and I want to serve God and I want to
serve people, and so much of that stems from me
watching the life that you have lived for all these years.
I'm thankful for you. Thank you for raising all your
four kids. Thank you for teaching them how to raise
me and my sister and my cousins. I'm grateful for you,
Grandma we Go. So I got my girl Lisa on,

(19:58):
who you know from the podcast but maybe your new
listener and you don't know, but she's been on before.
We also did a special series together called Outweigh, which
covered disordered eating and eating disorders, and really we just
both strongly feel that a life without disordered eating outweighs everything,
and we're super excited that we will be doing a

(20:18):
season two of that. So more to come when we
get closer to that. But I have gotten some d
MS from people where Outweigh has really helped them and
stirred up a conversation within themselves about body image and
relationships to food, and they hope that we'll do a
season two. So Lisa and I've talked and we are,
but that's not why she's here today. I actually subscribe

(20:42):
to her newsletter, which you can sign up for her
website as the well Necessities dot Com and then on
Instagram she's at the well Necessities. But I love, love,
love your newsletters, Lisa. They are always gold. You know.
Sometimes you send it for newsletters and you're like, what
I do this unroll me? But not with Lisa's. And

(21:04):
she sent one out the other day and it was
titled Negative Nancy No More, And honestly kind of came
at the right time for me because I really feel
I was a little bit negative Nancy. So it was
the perfect thing for me to see. So I thought,
you know what, Lisa, I want you to come on
and share with everybody your inspiration behind, you know, putting

(21:24):
out that newsletter and why it's so important that we
try to turn our thoughts the right direction and get
rid of the negative Nancy. Yes, so thank you so
much for the wonderful interaction. So this newsletter was titled
negative Nancy No More. And how I try and live
my life and what my brand is about is just
mindfulness in general. The plots with most people who hear

(21:48):
the word mindfulness think about meditating or a blissful state.
But to me, mindful living means getting to know yourself
and learning more about yourself so you can be your
best caretaker, and a lot of that comes from taking
care of your mind. So this news letter particular was
about our thoughts and the power that they have over

(22:10):
our well being. Thoughts alone can change our entire chemistry.
So when we are talking about the you know, types
of thoughts we have, this is not just about the mind.
It's not just about anxiety. We're talking about the tension
you hold in your body, the chemical state. And the
truth is is that to me, like just sink happy
thoughts is not something that I would While I'm a

(22:32):
positive person, I would never say to somebody just in
happy thoughts or kind of just like blind them with
the bright side for lack of a better word there,
because that's disingenuine to who I am. And I know
when I'm in a funk or feeling something, the last
thing that works is somebody telling me, you know, to
just get over it or you know, kind of making

(22:52):
light of the negative. Does that make sense, Oh? Totally,
Like it does not help to I almost feel like
sometimes if you're feeling in the sonk. You need to
recognize those feelings too, because they're valid. But then we
can't stay stuck there exactly. So just to kind of
like explain that, you know that the point of Nick
Nancy no More was not just think happy thoughts. You know,

(23:14):
I never want to invalidate someone else's or my own feelings,
because really what this is about is recognizing that all
of your thoughts are real, all of them are valid,
even the negative ones. The important distinction here is that
not all of your thoughts are true. And when we
recognize that not all of them are true, we have

(23:35):
begun to fuse ourselves. But we had thoughts. We are listening,
but hey, if our thoughts aren't true, maybe I should
take a second and hear my thoughts and really question them.
Bring curiosity into it. So amy, for a long time,
I had anxiety, Like if you ask me who I am,
it was like, I'm Lisa, and I have anxiety. That

(23:55):
is who I am. And I was telling my husband's
past week. You know, It's so interesting because there was
such a part of my identity. And now, don't get
me wrong, I get anxiety, but I'm not anxiety right.
So a big part of that came from really starting
to listen to the voices in my head and interrupting
the cycles, especially the negative feedback loops that we bring

(24:18):
ourselves into by not saying go away, you know, negative thoughts,
but rather observing, listening, and bringing curiosity to them. This
was inspired by an online mindfulness course that I took
back in June with Tara Brock and Jack Cornfield to
are like huge leaders in the mindfulness space, and Tara

(24:39):
basically said that we do a lot of thinking as humans.
We actually have sixty thousand thoughts a day, so that's
a lot of thoughts going through our head every day.
But the plot is here, the ninety eight percent of
those are actually the same thoughts as the day before.
So yeah, so it's the same boring thoughts over and
over again, majority of which are negative. So does that

(25:02):
feel like right for you? Like, do you find yourself
ruminating on the same things? I mean, I know for me,
I latch onto the negative far easier than I latch
onto the positive. Yeah. I think that I, yes, can
latch on to a story that is not true, which
can lean negative for sure, my story that I make
up for myself always seems to be this drastic scenario

(25:24):
that probably is so far from true, but I've made
it true, kind of like you were saying, the thought
is probably not true. My friend and I talked about
even making bracelets. You know, my daughter stas Share makes
these cute little squat bracelets, and I might go dig
into her bead box and pull out the letters for
not true and cute little beads and make me and
some of my girlfriend's bracelets that I can pass out

(25:47):
and literally that way, when you have those thoughts, you
can look down at your wrist and see a cute
little reminder that says not true. Right. That's that's powerful.
It's really powerful, And what is not true about it?
Can you share with us? For me, it is something
I have made up. And I don't know why necessarily

(26:07):
I go negative, but I know that it's a common
thing for a lot of people to do. Do you
know why we do it? Yeah? So well? According to too,
the reason that we fixate on the negative is basically
come from what we needed to do to survive as humans.
So historically we've lived through period where we were in
imminent danger all the time, whether an animal was attacking us,

(26:30):
or you know, we're in some sort of life danger
where we may not survive. We were constantly on alert,
and we were on alert because we needed to be,
because we needed to stay on the on the defense.
So translations, keeping the negative in our minds of what
could happen at all times kept us alive. Translation in
the modern world, though it doesn't always pan out like that,

(26:52):
and a lot of the things that we deemed negative
aren't actually you know, helping us survives better. So, first
of all, having a a bit of like some passions
for yourself that like, okay, you know, I'm not broken,
that I hold on to the negative memories and thoughts
and conditioned to do so is a really helpful way
to kind of just start moving and wiggling away from

(27:13):
the shame associated with I'm such a negative person, right,
Just conditioned to remember the negative as a way to
protect yourself, whether that you've experienced some sort of trauma,
keeping in mind that I think, in my opinion, traumas
that need to be the obvious. Trauma control up in
little ways in our life and has lasting impact, and
we may kind of close ourselves off as a way

(27:35):
to protect ourselves basically, the good news is that we
don't have to live like that anymore. And we are
minds just like our bodies, in my opinion, like they
have our back, and helping me recognize that helped me
begin to break free from this. So I think the
question is how do we begin to get out of
our own way, especially when we feel the negativity deep

(27:56):
into our bones, when we may even feel fearful to
move away from the negative thinking because we've been kind
of glued to it for so long. And I think
this is kind of where you come in every day Amy,
And it's choosing joy and gratitude because that creates base
and room for new thoughts that are not necessarily the

(28:18):
thoughts that replay over and over again. Yeah, and I've
said before in a million times, and Burnet Brown is
so good at explaining a lot of this. But there
is no joy without gratitude. So if you're wondering, like,
how do I get the joy, it's practice of gratitude
and sitting down and thinking of what you're thankful for.

(28:38):
And it doesn't even have to be some crazy profound
list of things you're thankful for. When you agree, it
can be like the smallest things in life too. It's
really just about looking up. Because when you're going through
a storm, whether it's a bad day or a bad
month or a bad six months. Since we've all been
in this, you're so glued to the negat to state,

(29:00):
and your chemistry changes. But when you look up from
the place that you just kind of and I mean
it's literally and figuratively, many of us are glued to
our phone, where the negative thoughts, feelings, and emotions them from.
When you look up, get in nature, you know, find
the littlest thing to be thankful for, find joy and
something so silly. Yes, it's so much easier than you think.

(29:22):
And there's freedom in that moment because you've broken free
from this way that you think you have to be. Yeah,
and there I saw a study. I wish I would have,
you know, jotted it down real quick. But I was
reading through this article and I saw that if you're
feeling down, not clinical type depression, but you're just feeling
depressed in a way, you're not yourself. One of the

(29:44):
first things that the article was saying to ditch was
social media and your phone just for a little bit,
not that you have to let go of it forever,
but take a step back from it, maybe just for
a week or so, and see if you feel rejuvenated
and you feel better and at least I know, I
just thought of this when you're talking about it, and
so I thought, well, maybe she can speak to this too,

(30:04):
because you've done that. Like, you are very intentional about
putting your phone away whenever you're getting off. Let's just
use Instagram for example. Do you get off your phone completely?
Do you delete the app? Like? How do you keep
yourself committed to staying off of it? Yeah, I'm very
a huge proponent of what I call phone free breaks,

(30:25):
where I personally turned my phone off. That is something
that I'm not digital at all. Oftentimes when I do
these phone free breaks, I'm working for my computer. But
the point is is that perfection isn't the goal here,
and so whatever you need tap into that. For me,
it's turning my phone off completely rejuvenates me. Um, I
just came off of a five day phone free detail

(30:46):
if you will, a phone free break, and I can't
tell you how rejuvenated I feel, and all of your
fears from moving away from it vanished, because your life
outside of it fills up so quickly, and it just
you space to be yourself again and to remember that
the world is not just social media in particular. And
I think that's a small helpful practice because I know

(31:08):
that most people may not do this. The biggest thing
for my well being has been too This is a
recent practice for me, and I'm not any might already
do this. I've no sp with my phone in the
other room. It's in my bathroom. Actually no, I don't,
but maybe I should start doing that. Yeah, so I've
been sleeping with my phone in my bathroom for about
a month, and I mean even before this. The second
best thing I've done for myself is I don't scroll

(31:29):
before bed, having just some boundaries I think are really important.
And so many people are focused on the morning routine.
What's the first thing you do when you wake up?
But in my opinion, it's what are you doing before
you go to bed? And for me, the most important
thing is to put that phone away. Stop, you know,
looking at what other people are doing, take the attention
off of other and bring that time back to myself,

(31:52):
whether it's reading a book or just laying in bed
diddling my thumbs for ten minutes before bed. There's nothing's
more powerful than making a little bit of ace from it. Okay, well,
just to recap our thoughts are super powerful and we
can change the story, right, like we don't have to
live in the repeat cycle of the lies. What is

(32:13):
it that you tell yourself when you've got something not
true replaying in your head? So it's a little bit
different than your approach, and it takes a little bit
more stillness, And I bring curiosity to that feeling, to
that negative feeling. So when I feel myself being angry,
whether it's at myself or someone else, that kind of
that's an emotion that reads really bad in my body

(32:33):
if it doesn't make me feel like me. So it
takes a little bit more skill. But when you bring
curiosity to that thought that's not true, you can gain
some wisdom from it. Why are you cycling? And that's okay?
What are you afraid of? Are you afraid of being
rejected or being hurt, of being taken advantage of? What
is that deep fear you really have? And when you

(32:54):
get to the bottom of that, you find a compassion
and softness for yourself that you didn't know was there,
and you'd be into really reshape not just your relationship
to yourself, but break free from that cycle once and
for all. Keeping in mind that things can totally retrigger
that habit and create that neural pathway again where you're
going down that negative feedback loop. But when you really

(33:15):
dig deep and get curious with it, you'd be surprised
what emerges. Yeah, and the triggers. I know you mentioned
this earlier, so I just want to say when it
comes to trauma, Yeah, there's we talked about this last
week when Katherine is on the podcast. There's big teas
and there's little teas. So there's little traumas that could
be happening all the time. But maybe you wouldn't really

(33:36):
define those as traumas until you've learned that yeah, they
actually are. There's just not it may not be this big,
crazy life experience, but it's still things that are affecting you.
Um So, just I love being more aware and and
learning things from my friends and things that they're doing
to stay positive and keep a healthy mind and practice

(34:00):
gratitude and try to you know, spread joy and choose
joy themselves. So Lisa, thank you for coming on to
share with us. And I'll just give people a heads
up you're going to be on next week two because
I'm gonna have you come back and talk about going
filter free on on Instagram because filters are a tricky thing,
and I agree with so much of your position on

(34:23):
filters and what you're doing for yourself. So I want
to dig more into that and help some listeners out too,
in case they're struggling with the whole filter thing. That
Thank you, Lisa, and I hope people go check you out,
follow you on Instagram. It's at the Well Necessities. Thank you.

(34:47):
So I have Morgan number two joining me for this thing,
because how old are you? Morgan number turn twenty six,
about to turn in October. Okay, so she's the youngest
member on the Bobby Bones Show and most of us
are sort of similar in age, and then Morgan was
the young I mean Ray used to kind of be young,
and then Morgan came in. And so when she first

(35:08):
joined the show, she was twenty four and we would
do a segment what a four year olds care about?
Now it's what year olds care about, and now you're
twenty six. It's crazy that you've been with us that long.
So I'm excited to have you on just to talk
about joy and happiness and gratitude for your age group

(35:28):
and things that y'all are doing, especially during a pandemic,
to stay happy insane. And I don't know, I'm just
curious to see if it looks a lot. I know
I have listeners that range from kids in high school
to sixty years old, so but I don't often get
some young blood on here, which speaking of blood, this
is random. But for you into Twilight, yes, I love Twilight.

(35:50):
Did you read the new book The Midnight Sun? And
there's another one? Is it a prequel or something? I
don't know where it falls in a lot of things,
but yes, I've seen and read all the books. Oh well,
I have No, I did not read the books, which
some of my friends are shocked by because my friends
that loved Hunger Games, which I did, loved Twilight too,
but I never got into it for some reason. And
recently we watched the movies as a family, and then

(36:13):
almost there's five. We've watched almost all of four. Sometimes
we can't even get a whole movie in. We'll just
start a movie before bed, and we get thirty minutes
before the kids have to go to bed, and I
only watch it with them, But when when you said blood,
it made me think of blood and I met this
part now where Bella was like anyway, I don't want
to get anything away, but there was blood and she

(36:34):
was like drinking out. I was like, what's happening? But
that's very new to me. But Twilight was probably your
like how old were you? And that gost your wheelhouse?
I want to say I was in middle school when
they first started coming out, because I still vividly remember
going to the movie theaters and waiting at midnight to
go to the premiere of all of the movies because
it was such a huge thing for people in my
age like that. That was what we did, was when

(36:55):
they those movies came out, you win. You were either
a team met Word or Team Jacob. You would stand
in line with which were you Because right now I'm
Team Jacob. Word creeps me out. I was Team Jacob
at the beginning because I couldn't understand the idea of vampires.
For a long time. For whatever reason, that concept just
did not sit well with me. As I got older,
I became team Wordward don't know why. But by the

(37:18):
end of Breaking Dawn, which is the last movie that's
Splitten too. I believe you might turn Team Edwards. Okay,
well maybe I will. My daughter wants to be a vampire.
Now I'm like, oh great, this is awesome. Vampires are
not real stuff. Sure she I don't really know that
she knows the whole team whatever. Again, it's new to
them as well, so we we missed that whole boat.

(37:39):
So I'll just encourage any families listening if you want
something to watch with your kids. We've recently done all
of Hunger Games movies, all of Divergent, all of May's Runner,
which Mays Rner was a recommendmendation for Morgan number two.
My kids loved it, and then now we're doing Twilight.
So it's all movies that were books that have multiple
movies and it's been fun. I'm like, what are we
gonna do next? If anybody has suggestions, I'll take them.

(38:02):
Which speaking of shows, like what has been bringing you
the most joy lately? I mean, I watch it on
repeat and it's a new Girl. It makes me so happy,
and I still I think I've watched the show like
five or six times at this point, and I still
l O l like sitting in bed and I just
start laughing out loud, and I'm like, oh, why does
this shows don't make me laugh? But it's so funny
and it's such a good show, and it's perfect for

(38:24):
people in their twenties because it is everything that you're
going through, and it's like it's like a modern day Friends.
Is really what it is. It's a girl who lives
with three four different guys and they just go through
life together and adult things that happened to them, but
they're like trying to navigate it and they're not very
good at it, and they're just best friends. That show
is probably like my favorite show ever, but always always

(38:45):
if I need a good laugh or need to forget things,
I put on New Girl. Are you millennial? Okay, you're millennial,
but I'm a millennial. But I was born in ninety
one and then you're three, so I'll say millennial. So
what are millennials doing during this time to maintain friendships relationships?
Because I feel like bonding with people or connecting with people.

(39:07):
Were made to connect and it's just so hard, but
that brings happiness. So what are you doing? It is hard,
and I mean I can speak to that. I live
by myself, so like, I really am all alone when
I don't see you guys at work and my family
is not here. So I think the thing about Corona
that's been crazy is that it's been a blessing in disguise,
and that I've actually been better about connecting with my

(39:27):
friends because I am home more. So I'm better about
texting relationships with my friends and better about facetiming when
I have. You know, I'm just sitting at home and
I'm really bored, and I just start facetiming, like shooting
off a bunch of facetimes with people. But also like
my friends and I have started connecting more like well
just to be safe, Like we'll go on a social
distanced walk, or we'll jump in cars and we'll kind

(39:49):
of like ghosted at Sonic and talk to each other.
We kind of like got back to the roots of connecting,
I would say, instead of just getting together to have
drinks and going out. Yeah, and you got back to
really the root of getting to just hang out and
talk with your friends. We do a lot of that now,
and I think my friendships are stronger than they've ever
been because of that. You know, we've gotten to a

(40:09):
point of of just making sure we're always checking in
on each other too, Like I'll always just text like, hey,
you're doing okay today, or if I know something's going on,
or if I'm like I haven't heard from him in
a while, let me make sure that they're still doing
as well as they can be doing right now. So
I would say that biggest thing is that we're just
checking in on each other. We've been really aware that
we're all going through a really tough time right now,

(40:31):
and nobody's going through the same thing, but it's all hard,
and so we're just checking on each other constantly, you know,
even like Hillary on the show, she knows I live
by myself, and she'll be like, okay, okay today, is
there's something going on, Um, I haven't heard friend, you
haven't talked to you, And I'm like, I'm good, just
really busy. But but just knowing that she's checking on
me is like a comfort in itself for somebody who,

(40:52):
like any of your friends that live alone or if
they're away from family and they can't be with their
family right now. But that would be the biggest thing.
I would say that we're all doing for each other
right now it's just being really good about checking in
and then what are you doing for yourself? Your mental
wealthy A whole other ballgame. But I go on a
lot of walks with my dog and I just jam

(41:12):
out to music. Music is like a huge outlet for me.
I'll put together like all different kinds of playlist. It's
a girl power playlist, or I really want to cry
today a playlist, or all country music, or whatever I
feel in that moment. I throw a playlist together and
I either go on a super long drive, pick up
some taco bell Anoi and just kind of have some

(41:33):
time to myself in the car driving around. Or I'll
take my dog on a walk and just like watch
her play around, and seeing her play brings me happiness,
Like she's so happy. She doesn't even know what's going
on in the world, and she's just playing in the
fields like it's no big deal. So between those two things,
that's what I'm doing, probably at least two or three
times a week. There's something about going for a drive
and like putting the window down, and I was driving

(41:55):
with the whole family there day we went on a
hike and then on the way back we're just I
felt so good, like we're out connecting with nature and
just breathing in the fresh air. And so when we
were driving back home, like a good song came on
the radio and I wanted to roll down the windows
and stick my arm out and feel the wind. And Stevenson,
my son in the back seat, and he's like, Mom, Mom,

(42:16):
keep your arm back inside. It's dangerous. And my arm
was not sticking out further than the side mirror. But
he just had not really, you know, seen that. I'm like, buddy,
roll down your window. Try the same thing. Like it
feels awesome, and trust me, you're safe. Like, as long
as your arm isn't out further than that, Dad or Mom,
we're not going to drive anywhere to where you're unsafe

(42:37):
and you're gonna hit something with your arm. If we are,
then there's a problem. But he did it, and we
all roll on our window and we all started singing,
and it was just this moment. I mean, doing it
alone is great too. There's something about like a drive
by yourself and the windows down. But that was our
first windows down family sing along, and I thought, Okay,
sometimes when my house gets a little nutty and stressed out,

(43:00):
I think I might just load everybody up in the
car and drown the song and roll on the windows,
and we're going to drive around until everybody can chill out.
There's something to be said about that, you know, alone,
or just there's something that people can connect to music
and driving around in the car. What song is your
jam right now? It's called good Times Roll by Nellie
and Jimmy Allen. I've never heard it so good. I

(43:21):
put it on when I get in the car, when
I go to the gym, all my walks, I have
it on repeat. I think I've probably been the reason
for all their streams. It's so bad. It's on constant
repeat and it's a it's like one of those songs
that's put you in a really good mood. And I
think that's why I like it so much. It's because
it's just it's the perfect vibe for anything that you're doing.
I've never heard it either, So I'm gonna play a

(43:41):
little clip for people right now in case they're curious
what he sounds like. In that way, I can have too,
because maybe people will need to download it if they're
going on walks, are working out or taking drives. So
here's a clip back sea when I got to Alabama

(44:06):
world a lot of people, And so what about dating
for you during this pandemic? For six year old I
know online dating is very normal for some of our listeners,

(44:29):
it still seems so weird because they may be in
a generation ahead of us, a little bit to where
I feel like my age group. We kind of got
in at the ground floor, like I did E Harmony
when I was twenty four, and it still felt so weird.
And I remember Bobby was doing match dot Com and
it still felt weird. But that was fifteen sixteen years ago.

(44:51):
So now there's nothing that would feel weird about it.
If I was single, I don't think I would think
twice about it because it's the norm. But it's got
to be hard wanting to have that connection. We can't
really go out on dates. So do you ever have
moments you're like, why am I even trying to connect online?
I don't know if I'm gonna be able to meet
this person or what's that been like for you? Because

(45:11):
I know I have a lot of listeners that are
single too, and they may want to know how you're
navigating it. The hard part for me was like, you know,
I used to go out with my friends, whether it's
a bar or restaurant or whatever, and you meet people
that way, and you'd be like, hopefully I'll end up
meeting somebody here. Your hope, you know, when you go
online dating, you hope you end up meeting somebody in person,
But you're giving yourself more chance by online dating, right

(45:32):
You're just putting eggs in different baskets, so they're not
all into one. So when you go out with your friends,
you're hoping you meet someone and stuff. So like, doing
the online dating, I think is the only way I
feel connected to that part of my life right now.
If I if I weren't on apps or something, and
I'd feel even more alone than I already do because
I wouldn't even be trying to put myself out there,
you know. Like that online dating has had a little

(45:53):
bit of a sense of security for me because it's like,
at least I'm still putting myself out there. I might
not be able to meet anybody in person, but at
least I'm still trying, right, So I appreciate the online
dating during this time because of that, I haven't done
any virtual dates. I feel like bastime is so personal
that you really just do it with your best friends, right,
So doing it with a stranger that you're meeting for
the first time, what about date? Same thing basime, right,

(46:17):
and you're like watching him and you know, it's just awkward.
It's almost like if you're on a work call. That's
what those feel like. And some of my friends have
done him and they're just like, I will never do
that again. It's awkward, it's uncomfortable. Well, if someone were
to want to take the plunge and finally downloaded dating app, like,
which one do you recommend? Because I have no idea,
I would say Hinge hinges the most. Well. I go
back and forth between Hinge and Bumble. Bumble is great

(46:39):
because the girls have to message first, so it changes
things up, you know, and you might have guys that
are more confident because they're allowing women to message him first,
different type of guys. But Hinge is also a good
one because it's more of the serious dating and that's
just mutual. Whoever messages first is whoever's first, but it's
more serious. Don't don't be on tender. I'm telling you,
it's like not that you want to be on it's

(47:01):
all about hookups. Don't do it. Yeah, just that one's
not going to bring you a lot of joy. It's
really not tell me on that one. Um, but yeah,
hinder bumble. I think you're both safe bets and depending
on the city. So I say you download both and
and you see which one works better in your city.
See what happens. Yeah, Okay. I saw this article that
was a survey of people over sixty five, and I

(47:22):
guess that's the age of people are considered old, which
you're sixty five, and listening to this, I'm not saying
that the article is because I don't think that that's old.
In fact, my dad's seventy eight, and until he had
his stroke and some his cancer scare the last couple
of years, he was so young. Now he's almost in
my experiences with him, seems super elderly, like ninety, but

(47:45):
like two years ago, three years ago he was seventy five,
but sixty maybe like he was not old. So I
just want to make that clear, like you're not old.
But they interviewed people over sixty five and they share
the ten best things about getting older, and so I
thought I would share with you some of them, since
you're six and you're still young, that we could go

(48:05):
over like as we age. I think when I was
twenty six, I thought I had a lot figured out.
I feel like you're way more mature than I was
at even though I was newly married and probably trying
to be a mom. But there's something about you that's
very mature, I think is thank you. Yeah, So at
twenty six, are you scared of thirty? I wouldn't say

(48:28):
I'm scared. I guess I'm I'm not scared of the age.
I'm scared of what comes with the age. Does that
make sense? Like responsibilities or wrinkles? I mean both really know,
just more that, like you know, as you get older,
your life changes, and right now I'm having so much
fun that like, by the time I'm thirty, I imagine
that I'm hopefully trying to get married or potentially married

(48:49):
and trying to have kids or whatever, and I just
I think about where I'm at now compared to that,
I'm like, my whole life is just going to be
basically a whole one eight, you know what I mean.
So I'm more if aid of what that will be
into and where all, but not the number not the
number itself. So for me, I'll say that thirty was awesome,
but as I get closer to forty, it's even more.

(49:10):
It's not as scary as I thought. I used to think, oh,
forty is so old, and it's just not. So that's
my encouragement to you, as a young person and any
other young person listening. And I think that in someone
older and wiser than me would tell me, yeah, just
wait till your fifty, it's amazing. Way to your sixty.
It's so awesome. And that's kind of what I got
from this survey in this list that you know the
best things about getting old, or especially if you're between

(49:34):
sixty five and seventy seven, they say you have more
free time because you're possibly retired. But I just want
to encourage people too that are in the thick of
it and like the prime of their career or maybe
still trying to figure things out and go, go, go
all the time. I feel like, don't you feel like,
since we have phones and computers, were always tied and
connected to work and being busy seems like a good thing.

(49:55):
But I just want to encourage people to to create
more free time for yourself. Us to play well and
even just like shutting off for one hour, right, Like
you talked about going on a hike with your family.
Hikes are so fun and you get so disconnected from
the world or a walk or whatever. But just turn
off your phone and be like, I'm not gonna pay
attention for one hour. And that one hour you're like, okay,
I'll do this for like five hours. This is great. Yeah, well,

(50:17):
I love it getting older at home more free time.
But I feel like as young people, and I still
consider myself you are, we need to create more free
time for ourselves. Then. One of the other things that's
awesome about being older is not feeling pressure to do
anything you don't want to do. And I'm like, why
do we have to wait till we're seventies seven? Not
having fomo? Yeah, Marry and I joke that we want

(50:38):
to make Joemo shirts, which is the joy of missing
out the phase now where you're where you have Joemo
rather than fomo. Yes, okay, but I don't need to
look forward. But are you extrovert or introvert? I can
be both. I'm more extrovert, my personality extrovert, but I
definitely have fomo. Like, if my friends are doing something,
I'm like, oh, dang right, I need to be doing
something instead of just sitting at home binging a TV show.

(51:00):
Does that make sense totally. I'm an introvert, but I
am extroverted from my job, so I really have to
have that recovery time to like get away from all
the social activities and just be alone. And I'm never
alone anymore but family, and I wanted kids, and I
want that, so it's fine. One of the other amazing
things about getting older is having grandchildren. Were a little

(51:20):
far off from that. Finding pleasure in the little things.
We should not have to wait till seventy seven for that.
Realizing there's more to life than work. Okay, yes, we
need to be into that. Wearing clothes for comfort not style.
I'm not it might take me till seven to figure
out that. I did some days though, where both of
us coming and we have our yoga pants. I'm wearing

(51:41):
them right now. Yeah, like I'm just saying, but heels
and coronavirus has really helped my back. I did do
an intense round of pickleball tournaments that my back is
hurting now. But I realized my back was getting better,
and I couldn't really figure out exactly why. And it's
because we're not getting dressed up for work anymore. I
was wearing boots with heel almost every day, and then

(52:02):
now I'm wearing tennis shoes every day. My back is better.
Maybe you can find some like, aren't they like the sneaker?
He'll kind of things like a platform sneaker. Yeah, kind of.
I kind of have them on right now. Yeah, there's
not a hell, there's just like a they're they're taller,
it's sneaker. Real. Another thing on the list was not
caring anymore what other people think. I feel like you're

(52:24):
good at that, but I could be wrong. But at
what age do you think you because I mean I
think as girls especially, we often care too much about
what people think. Do you still struggle with that or
where's their age where you realize like, hey, I'm just
not gonna start caring. I mean, I think you hit
it just as as women. I think we're naturally always
going to have that, just even a little bit, even

(52:45):
if it's not, you know, overpowering. For the most part,
I don't care, but then everybody has their moments where
they're like, oh, I care what people say. I know
we care too much, but I mean, I just I
didn't know if you had a moment where you thought,
I'm just not going to do this anymore. But I think,
let's not wait any longer on that. We need to
stop caring so much and trying to conform to what
we think other people expect of us. Even harder to

(53:06):
with social media now because you're on Instagram and you're
constantly comparing yourself to everybody else. So I realized when
I stopped looking so much at other people and wanting
to be other people, is when I did start to
stop caring as much. I love that, Uh, finally having
a clear idea of what's important in life, which I
do think that there takes age and wisdom with that,
and as you age, different things become important. Number nine,

(53:29):
all the discounts, so when we're older, we get to discounts.
And then lastly, not always having to worry about the future,
because I guess we're all that much of it ahead.
I don't like that one very much, but it's funny
that says it too, because my my grandma, she passed
away this year, but before that she would always just
death was so matter of fact to her, you know

(53:49):
what I mean. It was just like yeah, one day, hell,
I won't be here anymore, and it was no big deal.
And I was like, please stop saying that. To us,
it was it's this whole ordeal because you have so
many years. But to them, but like, I don't know.
I mean, I'm here and I've lived a great life
and whatever happens is going to happen. So it's kind
of funny that that's on there. I feel like in
most older people that I meet are so matter of
fact about that, just it is what it is. I'm

(54:11):
ready when I'm ready. My dad has become a little
bit like that, And again it's weird because he was
not like that a few years ago, but now it
is seems like a very real reality because we've had
scary moments and then with coronavirus and he definitely has
a compromised immune system. I get super worried. He lives
and assisted living, so I can't really control who he's
always coming in contact with, although they've been amazing, but

(54:33):
he did. He literally said that to me last Wednesday,
just really nonchalantly, like, well, you know, he's like if
I die. I need to make sure that this happens.
And he just said it, like he was telling me
about a TV show we just saw that he liked,
and I thought, Dad, we're not going to die. But
then also I need to be prepared that that could be.
He's not having to worry about the future, even though

(54:53):
he was expressing something he wanted me to take care
of if he passed away. That's probably the hardest thing
about getting older, you know, back to the realizing that
as we age, like being scared of being thirty or
being scared of being forty, we'll find thirty and then
I'm forty again. I'm okay with it, but that also
means people in my life that are older than me

(55:13):
are hundred. And I'm sorry about your grandma. I know
that that was hard too. That there is some comfort
in knowing that she was ready for it, you know
what I mean. It's weird, and it was always weird
hearing her saying that, but I look at it now
and I'm like, she she knew what was right and
what was going to come, and she was prepared and

(55:36):
she loved her life before that. So and she's someone
that you feel like you have different nuggets from her
that you'll take with you. Oh yeah, And and my
grandpa still here and we, you know, we talk and
we still talk about her stories. And she was just
so feisty, and she had just such this spitfire personality
and I a hundred percent believe that is part of

(55:59):
my life every day. It's hard, but you know, you
you cherished the memories and she, I mean she even
we found out that my my dad and his siblings
were going through like her stuff for my grandpa, and
she had left. She used to carry like these, not handkerchiefs,
but kind of like little things that older people used

(56:19):
to carry with them all the time, kind of like
little cloths or whatever. And she has four of them,
and she put him safe tucked away in this treasure chest.
And they found it, and she had written a note
that she wanted it for all of her grandchildren, and
she said who and what, like she was planning. She
knew that it was coming, and she wanted to make
sure that all of her kids had this one really

(56:39):
important memory for her that we knew we'd recognize her
by kind of thing. And I thought that was really awesome,
because she she knew, you know, she knew how to
leave behind the best memories for us even when she
was gone. Yeah, I've often wondered with grandparents is different

(57:00):
as they're older. But certain times in your life, like
when I lost my mom, she was definitely too young.
She could have had many more years if she hadn't
had cancer, And I thought we were there when she
took her last breath, and thinking is this better watching
your mom slowly die for a week or if do
you want to just get a phone call that poof,
it's over. I still don't know the answer to that,
And I feel like everybody's personalities are different, but there

(57:22):
is something about being able to to plan it out
and prepare people. I think I would choose that knowing
and because my mom was able to plan a little
bit and be a part of her end of life
celebrations and stuff and put her opinion in. But it
makes me your story about the handkerchiefs, who makes me
think of an article I read just the other day

(57:43):
about a dad that had cancer and his little girl
was maybe I don't know, five or six at the time,
and he went ahead and prepaid for flowers to be
delivered to her on her birthday. Until she was twenty one,
and this year was her twenty first birthday and she
and it was the final one, and each flowers were
delivered with a card that he had handwritten out. So

(58:03):
he went that many years got cards wrotor notes, and
he said, this is your twenty one birthday, and this
is the final flowers you're going to get for me.
I guess that's where he had cut it off, which
seems appropriate, and he just had this heartfelt message to her,
and I thought, Okay, wow, that's that's a circumstance in
which it's really cool that he got to think ahead

(58:26):
and he knew he didn't have much time left and
he was able to give her that, which I'm sure
every year was really hard when she got the flowers,
but also so thankful that her dad took the time
to think of that and it probably also brought her
a lot of peace and comfort and happiness, and sure
she was grateful for it too. Oh yeah, and how
how do you not just have that memory every year?

(58:47):
And it's probably even gonna be hard that she won't
get him moving forward. I know, you know to to
think about that, but just that's a special memory to
get every year. I don't know how we got here.
We need I need your girls tanking now to wipe
my eyes sometimes. I mean, you know, you said this
whole thing was about joy, and sometimes finding joy means

(59:07):
dealing with your sadness, right, you know? And and after
my grandma passed and things that you've been through, I
think we can both test to that that the only
way we got back to being happy again or finding
joy and things again was dealing with that sadness and
being okay with it and still having moments. Even in
all the joy that you'll have, you'll have moments where
you'll cry and need to cry it out. Yeah, if

(59:28):
you know other feelings that you have, you're not going
to feel the joy that comes along with. It's like
the yang and the yang. I feel like they go
hand in hand and like a fake joy. You know,
you can't you can't really embrace full on happiness until
you just recognize that you're going to have all the
other emotions and you have to live with them. But
you have to really live with them so you can

(59:50):
continue to have the really good ones. And if you're
really having a tough day processing them, then you need
to put on Jimmy Allen and Nelly and get in
your car and roll down the way doll and go
for a drive. Yes, exactly that. Well, thanks for coming on, Morgan.
I'm just having I know I call you Morgan number
two because that's true on the show, but out of
respect being more than on Morgan number two. Thank you

(01:00:13):
for coming on, Morgan, and you all can find her
on Instagram. She's at web girl Morgan

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Accountability + Gratitude. Spreading Joy. No Negative Nancy. Positivity in a Pandemic.