Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:11):
Andrea Lee Rodgers is a celebrity trainer, motivational coach, and
the founder of Extend.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
Bar, which has studios all over the world.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
You guys have probably seen her workouts on Body is
it pronounced body Body.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Body Okay bo d I y'all?
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Or maybe in Vogue, Harper's Bazaar, or l where she's
been featured. She's also a mom of two, a skincare entrepreneur,
and now the author of the brand new book Small Moves,
Big Life, Seven daily practices to supercharge your energy, productivity,
and happiness. Andrea has built a career around helping women
feel stronger, calmer, and more confident, so she's here to
(00:49):
show us today how to do that without completely overhauling
our lives.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
I love this idea.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
Hi, Andrea, Hello, I'm so glad to be here. Thank
you so much for being here. We're so excited to
talk to you. I was reading there was a stat
that says almost three fourths of women report carrying the
emotional stress of their family and friends, and nearly one
in twelve moms rate their mental health as poor or fair,
which made me so sad. So I'm wondering you're a
(01:15):
person who's been in the health and fitness industry forever.
Was there something in your life that happened because we
listed all your stats so we.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Know all the things you have going on.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Was there some sort of catalyst that really made you
say to yourself, I have to help other women get
out of what I'm going through right now.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
Yes.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
So I entered the fitness and wellness world because I
loved movement to movement was a part of my life
from a young age. I was a dancer and then
became a professional dancer, and after graduating from college, I
was quite bewildered on what I was going to do
with my adult life. Right I knew I had to adult,
and I didn't quite know how to do it. So
I segued my love for movement into a pilate's career,
(01:53):
which grew into extend bar, which grew into franchising and
all the things.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
And I learned very early on.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
That I got a high while teaching these classes, like
I got a high when I saw these women struggling
and challenging in their movements and then coming on the
other side of it and going, oh my god, I
can't believe I did that, or coming back the next
week and feeling empowered and strong coming back the next
year and being a completely different version of themselves And
(02:21):
through teaching private one on one clients, through the classes
and globally, you know, connecting with women. I learned very
early on in my fitness career the parallels between doing
something hard and your workout class and doing something hard
in your life and having the confidence and courage and
encouragement to do it in the classroom, and the same
(02:43):
thing reaching those levels in your life. And so, through
some challenges of my own that I came into not
expectingly right, I discovered that I needed to start to
adopt some of these small changes in my life in
order to breathe again, in order to function again, in
order to see the light in a very dark time
(03:03):
in my life. And through that process, I started to
share the things that worked with me, you know, just
very organically, like my best friends. Okay, girl, here this
is what I'm doing in the morning to get my
day going, and here's what I'm doing at night to
get the best leap of my life. And here are
some things that I'm doing when I feel like my
world is spinning. And those things just started to connect
and really make an impact in the people close to me.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
And then it went from my inner circle to a
larger circle, to.
Speaker 4 (03:29):
My clients, to my members, and then I decided, let's
write this down, Let's write a book.
Speaker 3 (03:33):
Yeah, put this in some form of a tangible toolkit.
Speaker 4 (03:37):
You know.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
I feel like it so often takes us just hitting
the wall before we completely make a change. Do you
think burnout is just a prerequisite for us finding balance?
Speaker 3 (03:46):
Oh my god, that's a great question, right, It's so true.
Speaker 4 (03:49):
It's like you do because you keep going and going
and going and going until you physically or mentally cannot
any longer, and then change happens. And that's one of
the reasons why I wrote Small Moves but Life, because
I don't want that to be the catalyst for change.
I want women to be able to embrace these small
changes in their everyday life before they hit that full
(04:10):
on burnout, or as they're about to hit before everything spirals,
to adopt some of these strategies. Because I believe you're right.
I think that as women, we wear so many hats.
The expectations are so high that we put on ourselves,
not just society, and we just go because that's what
we can do.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
Right, and we just layer it up, add another thing
to the duds, keep going, keep going, keep going until
you finally break.
Speaker 4 (04:31):
And I don't think we should wait until that break
to find that calm, to find that direction and strategy
in our lives, and to feel in control again.
Speaker 3 (04:40):
It feels good to control again.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
I do feel like like I'm in this place. And
I don't know if you resonate with this or anyone listening,
but because of our access on social media, you know,
it feels like everyone's got a book, everyone's a coach,
everyone's doing all these things, and so sometimes it even
gets overwhelming with knowing where to start.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
With what would help you better your life.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
You know, it can be a little bit overwhelming there,
and then it's like, oh my god, I have to
pay for this big program and it's so many days
in this big investment. And what I loved so much
about your process is it's seven practices that we can
are seven would you say, practice practices that you can
do in your life, but it can be done in
thirty minutes each. Was there a reason that you really
(05:23):
wanted to target that small amount of time.
Speaker 3 (05:25):
I feel like we're soulmates, Kelly, because you just so exactly.
Speaker 4 (05:28):
One of the reasons is because we are inundated with
these messages. Everybody is a life coach. Everybody has a
story to share.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
And I think it's beautiful and I think it's wonderful,
and I think so many of them are very helpful.
Speaker 4 (05:40):
But it can become this cycle of comparison, and it
can become a cycle of there is just feels like there's.
Speaker 3 (05:47):
Just so much to do and so much to change.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
That you freeze, right, You just freeze like I can't
possibly add more or do more in my life, and
you just stop and you don't move anywhere, and you
continue to sit back and watch other people rise while
you feel like you just stay stagnant. And so for me,
it was like, no, no, no, you don't need to
overhaul everything. You don't need to do three workouts, one outside,
(06:11):
one inside. You don't need to you know, read five
books today. You don't need to like do all the things.
Here are some very simple things, not rocket science, although
back by science, that are going to actually make you
feel like, holy cow, like I'm actually making progress. I'm
actually moving the needle, I'm moving towards the right direction
without feeling like I'm just in a swirl, you know,
(06:34):
Like I heard.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Some of the other day. I was at my daughter's
cheerleading game.
Speaker 4 (06:37):
So I was at the football game and another parent
was staying hi to a parent walking by and said, Hey,
how you doing, And she was like, uh, I'm maintaining.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
That was like sad, I know, and I was like,
I stopped her. I said maintaining, Yeah, Okay, I get that,
but like I feel like that's what we do. We
just get through the day. Every day. It's like, let's
get through the day.
Speaker 4 (07:00):
And that's not a way to live, right, And there
will be days like that. Realistically, not every day is
going to be like thriving. But if we can zoom
out and have more days that we feel like we're
kind of doing the right things and we're feeling good
about ourselves at the end of the day as opposed
to just maintaining, you know, that's that's the goal and
that's where change happens, and that's where pride occurs.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Yeah, it's like we need that thing where you're having
the little small win even to keep going right, Like
you need the motivation of that.
Speaker 4 (07:29):
That's motivation Yeah, motivation doesn't wake you up, like you
don't get up.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
In the morning you're like, I'm so motivated.
Speaker 4 (07:34):
I mean sometimes you are, but it's the discipline to
do the small things. And then when you do those
songs things, you get those moments like you just said, Kelly.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
Where you're like, oh, I just did that. That's that's
a win.
Speaker 4 (07:44):
That's a win for the day, and that creates a
little bit of pride and that creates motivation, and then
you do it again and it just starts.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
To add up.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
Yeah, well, I want to talk about the do the thing,
the DTT method. That really stuck out to me because
I feel like I live by endlest to do list.
You know, that is just constantly where my life feels it.
It's it's the guiding force, but they never get done fully.
So how is this different?
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Yes, Okay, so that was my life.
Speaker 4 (08:14):
Okay, I lived by that to do list and at
one point I had just moved to New York City. Okay,
I had just gone through a very difficult separation and divorce,
going through divorce, and I decided, yes, let's move to
New York City. Is a single mom with two kids
and nobody that I know there, I think that's gonna
be a great idea. And everybody thought I was crazy
in my life, but I knew that was what I
(08:34):
needed to do. However, it was so overwhelming, right, I
went from like a nice house to this.
Speaker 3 (08:39):
Tiny, dainty, tiny two bedroom apartment. I was like, girls,
take all of your toys and they fit in one box.
So whatever fits in this box is what we take.
Speaker 4 (08:47):
And we had this little, tiny apartment and I remember
just standing there. I'll never forget it, and the girls
were playing over here in the room. The other one
was playing in the living room, and there were boxes everywhere,
and I was like, and I was running an international business, right,
and I'm sitting myself going what the hell.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
Did I do? Like how am I going to do this?
And I just was o physically, you know, overwhelmed with boxes.
And I had this to.
Speaker 4 (09:10):
Do list and I was like, this is like it
looked like a failure list. Right. It gave me anxiety
every time I looked at it, and I was like,
there has to be a better way, Like I can't
keep adding to this list because I'm drowning. So I
just ripped it up and I sat down at my
tiny little table that only fit three chairs because that's
all we had room for an apartment. And I sat
there and I looked outside at my neighbor, who I
(09:32):
could pretty much see brushing their teeth, and I was like,
three things today. I'm just going to attack with no excuses,
three non negotiables today, and I'm going to be more
strategic about what I write down. I'm going to think
about this. I'm going to be intentional with what I
do today. What are the three things that I can
do today that are going to make me feel like
(09:52):
I accomplish something today.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
So when I put my head on the pillow at night,
I'm like, okay, yeah, that was a good day. So
I gave it some thought, you know, and I wrote
down those three things, and it felt good at the
end of the day. And the next day I did
the same thing, and then next day did the same thing.
And then a few weeks later I was like, this
is really working. This is adding up. I'm moving the needle.
I'm feeling in control.
Speaker 4 (10:14):
I no longer feel like I'm just like being run
by this list or or bulldozed by this list. I
feel like I'm in control. And then the next time,
I was like, you know what, I can add two more,
So I'm just gonna add two.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Little bonus moves on there.
Speaker 4 (10:26):
So I did the things and then I got a
couple extras done, and then I added a signature move
where I was like, you know what, I need one
thing during the day that just feeds my soul, just
me like selfishly me, you know, like what.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Can I do?
Speaker 4 (10:38):
And I added a little signature move and I do
that every single day as well, simple little things.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
But I love this signature move though, too, because I
think on the list for me, I feel like it's
things I have to do or this should do, you know,
those things like that. So when you're adding the thing
that you want to do into that, it makes everything
else again. You're more motivated to go do all these
other things. Like I think we forget about ourselves and
we neglect ourselves until we go through the full breakdown.
(11:07):
So this is a good way to incorporate it into
your day to day life and.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
Take the guilt away.
Speaker 4 (11:12):
Like a lot of the times we're at the end
of the day, things are busy, you should be folding
the towels, yet you really want to just sit there
with a skincare mask on and like veg out for
a moment, and we tell ourselves that we can only
choose one or we have to do the right one.
And if you wrote that down on the list in
the morning, you're like, no, I committed to actually taking
this time for myself, and you actually do it and
there's no guilt. It's like, you know the other things
(11:33):
on the list. It's on the list, so you gotta
do it, you gotta do the thing. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:37):
Well, speaking of guilt, you talk a lot about mom guilt,
and I want to talk about breaking free of mom guilt.
What does that actually look like in real life? Because
I think so often the guilt and the heaviness can
feel stronger than the motivation. So how do we break
free from things that we feel just like there's no
(11:58):
winning battles. I mean, there's no way to win that
battle to me, you know, like that's always kind of
a balancing act.
Speaker 4 (12:04):
Well, first of all, I feel like we have to
lower the I don't want to say lower the bar,
but I think we have to release the expectations of
what we put on ourselves in terms of what is
real and what is not, Like you know, like, come on,
we're not going to be able to do all the things.
You're not going to be a superhero mom. You're not
going to be like room mom and at the same
time be like a badass CEO running a bit. You're
(12:26):
you will have moments that you wear both hats. You
will have moments where you are winning as a mother.
You will have moments that you're winning in your personal
life or career, and that will ebb and flow. And
I think when we start to zoom out, I always say,
like zoom out, that's a word I use often, like
zoom out.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
Look at are you doing a good job this category?
Speaker 4 (12:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Are you doing a great job in that kind of great? Great?
Speaker 4 (12:45):
Then let's get rid of this mom guilt that we
are supposed to be perfectly balanced, because that's not a thing.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
There's different seasons.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
You're gonna go through seasons where you're like crushing it
as a mom. You're gonna go through seasons where you
were not. And that's okay. Because our intentions are there
to be great at everything.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
We just don't always show up a great of everything.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
And so for me, it's like, let's get rid of
those expectations.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
And zoom out.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
I think that's so smart. We had the former head
of NBC Universal, her name's Bonnie Hammer. She was on
a couple weeks ago and I said, how do you
how did you do work life balance, and like, how
did you figure out how to do that? She said,
I didn't. Like, that doesn't exist. We've got to stop
the narrative that that is some goal we're trying to
get to. It just doesn't exist. So similar to what
(13:27):
you're saying, you do the best you can every day
and zooming out and saying am I doing a good job?
Speaker 3 (13:33):
Correct?
Speaker 1 (13:33):
Is that if we don't do it perfect, that's the thing.
Speaker 4 (13:36):
We expect perfection, And then we compare. We compare like,
oh my god, look at Susie and she's doing this
with their kids, or look at so and so and
she's building this with their business or writing the book
or whatever, and we have to stop and just look
at her own little bubble and then zoom out of
our bubble and go, are you doing a good job?
You're doing a good job. Are you giving it your intention?
Is your intention to do great?
Speaker 3 (13:55):
It is?
Speaker 4 (13:55):
And yeah, it's not as going to add up and
then stop with the mom guilt like I travel. My
kids do not feel deprived. I miss certain things at school.
They do not feel unloved, like they just know mom
works hard and she has certain jobs and responsibilities outside
of being a mother that are required for me to do.
And when I show up for them, I show up
(14:16):
full out and they.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
Know that too.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
In some arguments, you could say too, that creating a
life for yourself that's more full than one piece, like
I'm just a mother is showing is living by example
and teaching as well. So it's another version of being
a great mom in a way, because you're showing your
daughters all the things that are possibilities in this world.
Speaker 3 (14:37):
You bet.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
And I'm also showing them that although they are a
massive part of my world, right they're my world, they're
not the only world for.
Speaker 3 (14:46):
Me, right like, because that's not realistic either.
Speaker 4 (14:49):
Like they have to understand they are super special to me,
they're special in our world, but there are a lot
of special people in this world. We all have to
keep living our lives. And so yes, I think setting
that stage very early on so that they don't think
that the sun rises and sets with them, that they
understand the life keeps going, and they have to figure
out their role in it and how we all play
role in contributing to a dislife that we live.
Speaker 3 (15:09):
Right.
Speaker 4 (15:10):
They have to help me around the house, they have
to do their chores, they have to you know, do
things because we are a team and it takes a
team in order to you know, make things work well.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
We mentioned that you were an answer back in the day.
I mean, you've always kind of been in like movement practices,
so I love that your teens are actually simple though,
and you don't have to go to the gym. Can
you share with the listeners maybe just a quick five
minute reset that you're loving right now or your favorite
quick reset with your body?
Speaker 3 (15:49):
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Speaker 4 (15:50):
So one of my favorite chapters in the book is
all about movement. And you know, I've been teaching fitness
for almost twenty years now, and the one thing that
I notice, and I know, the one thing that is
going to make you that person that feels good, that
moves their body every day, that gets results is showing up.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Okay, is just being consistent.
Speaker 4 (16:13):
And in order to be consistent, you have to do
things that you a enjoy and be you're going to
stick with, right You can't like, do the latest trendy
workout because your girlfriend does it and she got great results,
but you absolutely hate it and your body feels terrible afterwards.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
Right, So you have to.
Speaker 4 (16:27):
Actually first identify what you like to do it feels
good on your body. Secondly, I like to remove the
barriers and excuses. I want you to just move your
body every day for ten minutes. That is my goal
for you, every single day, without fail, no excuses, unless
you are really sick, you are going to move your
body every day for ten minutes. So when I decided
(16:48):
to launch the book, I also filmed ten minute workouts
and if you buy the book, you get access to
the workouts for free. I was like, I'm going to
make this as easy as can possibly so people.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
Can no excuse it, no excuses.
Speaker 4 (17:00):
Because I know what's going to happen, Kelly, when people
actually show up every day for ten minutes for themselves
every day and they move their body. When you move
your body, you move your life. Okay, you move your body,
you move your life. You will feel obviously all the
physical benefits, right, the endorphins. You're going to feel stronger,
you have more energy, but your mind is going to
be clearer, You're going to feel good that you just
(17:21):
did something good for yourself. You're going to make healthier choices.
You're going to feel more capable to jump into a
challenging situation because you just did something that was.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
A little bit hard and you got through it.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
There are so many benefits that we know scientifically and
that we know mentally, and we know physically, and we
know just for our.
Speaker 3 (17:38):
Own well being for working out.
Speaker 4 (17:41):
So ten minutes every single day, and that's it.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
These ten minute workouts, they deliver it.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
Now, if for some reason, let's say ten minutes is
not enough for you and.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
You need more, you can double up. You can do
whatever you want.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
But I also sneak in throughout the day something I
call movement snacks.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
And these are little.
Speaker 4 (17:57):
Bite sized opportunities to move your body when you would
otherwise just be city and idol, like just just you know,
while I'm waiting for my milk for my macha to
cook in the microwave or on the stove or whatever
you're doing, I sit there and I do lunches right
when I'm brushing my teeth, I'm doing PLA's when I
am waiting for a commercial like the Girls, and I
will hold a plank like there are moments all day long,
(18:20):
but I sprinkle in a tiny, little one to two minutes,
maybe thirty seconds of movement, And I'm telling you, it
changes your whole way of thinking throughout the day.
Speaker 3 (18:30):
It changes who you are.
Speaker 4 (18:31):
You're the person that instead of standing there leaning on
the countertop scrolling Instagram, you're doing a lunch while you're
waiting for you know, the microwave. That's a big shift
in your life. That's a big change in trying to
be you know, move the needle in the right direction for.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
How you want to live.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
And it's you know, it's so much more realistic. I
know in my forties, when I was in my twenties,
I would work out all the time, but I had
all the time in the world, like it didn't have
the responsibilities right. Part of my job felt like being
hot in your twenties, you know, like you're just like
this is part of it. Then you get older and
you have more responsibilities either you have a family, you
(19:06):
have a job, and it's so difficult to maintain what
I used to without just completely stopping because like you said,
consistency is so much more important too, as we ate
so much important And that's that's been the harder thing
for me though, is because I don't have as much
time or energy, if I'm being honest, because so that's
the more responsibilities.
Speaker 3 (19:26):
Yes, yes, that's why I'm telling you. We did a challenge.
Speaker 4 (19:30):
We did a six week challenge just we just finished
it up, wrapped it up a couple of weeks ago.
We have about one thousand people in our Facebook group
page right now, and it was unbelievable. People were like,
oh my god, I'm that woman that is working out
every single day.
Speaker 3 (19:42):
I'm a world of by that person.
Speaker 4 (19:44):
And you can easily do it because you're not jumping
in the car and going to the gym and having
to change. You can just do this in different jamas,
like it's right, there's no excuses. And when you say
to yourself ten minutes, right, you're like, Kelly, I can
do ten minutes, yes there is if I it almost
makes you like it's like the reverse. It's like if
you don't do it, like you don't.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Want to be that person that can't even and it's right.
Speaker 4 (20:07):
So it kind of puts that pressure on you in
a good way to be like, come on, show up,
do this for yourself, and I'm telling you, within a
couple of weeks it is a game changer.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
Yeah, it probably Also, I would say, you have to
shift the mentality of this instant gratification that we're so
used to because we don't know how to build things anymore.
And that's been a really interesting experience of aging for
me too, is that my body can't bounce back the
way it used to, and I don't want to hurt
myself either, so I have to be a little more
patient with processes now. And so this is but this
(20:40):
is a perfect way to do it because you're not
overdoing it every day and it feels attainable.
Speaker 3 (20:45):
I love that you said that.
Speaker 4 (20:46):
I think not only do we have to get more
comfortable with patients in each process, we also have to
get more comfortable with allowing ourselves to become beginners and
work towards mastery on something. And I say that because
we are so quick to have something new and shiny
and exciting in order to stimulate.
Speaker 3 (21:04):
Right, like back in the day, what I would create
a workout video.
Speaker 4 (21:06):
I did one video, one DVD, right like i'maging myself,
but one DVD and we would do it every day,
like you would press play on that one workout every
single day, and guess what, you got crazy sick results, right,
because you were able to master it and you got
better and better, and because you were better with your
form and technique, you were able to go deeper in
your range of motion and lift more and all these things.
(21:28):
And now I will launch a workout program with thirty
brand new workouts and my members will do all thirty
in a day at thirty and they're like, okay.
Speaker 3 (21:37):
What's next to them? Like repeat? This could last you
a lifetime, summer, last you the rest of your life.
But we're so we're bored so quickly, right, we get
so bored.
Speaker 4 (21:48):
And it's just it's a you know, it's because of
what we do every day and the scroll in and
the constant excitement that we get in the jolt of adrenaline.
And I'm saying, let's just pause for a moment and
become beginners and be comfortable with trying to master something.
Be comfortable with repetition, you know, be comfortable with it
and lean into it, lock into it, and see the
(22:08):
power of repetition.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
Yeah, I'm wondering if there's a tie because I know
you talk about perfectionism, and that's something I really related to.
Just I think anyone that's a high achieving person probably
relates to it a little bit. And so I'm wondering
if breaking things up like what you just described, does
that also help us kind of overcome some of our
perfectionistic tendencies in a way.
Speaker 4 (22:30):
I believe so, and for me personally, yeah, very much so,
very much so. I think when you were able to
take bite sized moments and try to bite sized processes,
bite sized changes, bite sized habits, whatever it is that
you're focused on, if you can break it down a
little bit and get comfortable with the repetition and lean
into Okay, this is not going to be perfect right away.
This is not going to deliver those instant results that
(22:52):
I'm looking for, but that's okay. Yeah, and I'm going
to try and just be a beginner and let it
be sloppy and let it be messy and let me
a fool of myself and then get to the other
side with time and patience.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Okay. You also link procrastination to health, and I'm curious
what is that connection, because that I have never connected
the two or thought they were related in any way,
shape or form.
Speaker 4 (23:16):
Well, it's interesting if you look at whether you yourself
are a procrastinator or let's say you have I think
we all know someone in our life, correct, right, we
all have someone in our life that were like, oh,
if they would only just do the thing, they would
stop complaining and they would start feeling better in all
areas of their life. I have a couple of friends
like that where I'm like, okay, enough talking and let's
(23:38):
start taking action. Enough you know, wishing, wanting and hoping,
and let's start moving.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
Right, let's take that action.
Speaker 4 (23:46):
And the individuals in my life that have been able
to recognize that, that have been able to go, yes,
I need to stop stalling and start moving and take action,
stop procrastinating, and just do the thing. It is incredible,
especially with their health wise, all the things that come
together in their life and they start to be just
a stronger, healthier version of themselves in everything in every way. Right.
(24:10):
And it's to me, and I've watched this happen firsthand
multiple times again and again. It is the most incredible
thing when you can recognize and have the self awareness
to say this is what.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Is holding me back.
Speaker 4 (24:23):
This is what I need to change, and you can
become that person that you're not perfect.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
In some areas of your life.
Speaker 4 (24:28):
You might procrastinate, but overall you start to shift that needle,
you start to move forward, You start to take action
in your life. Look at how you feel every day.
Look at your mental health. How do you wake up
every day?
Speaker 3 (24:38):
You know what I mean? How do you go to
bed every night? Do you sleep better? You know? Are
you more energized during the day.
Speaker 4 (24:44):
We don't realize how much procrastination plays a role on
our mental health, the anxiety that surrounds it. I mean,
just something little as if you are the type of
person that lets the boxes in the corner of your room,
the Amazon boxes, decks, deck, stacks, deck, and every day
you pass those boxes and you're like, oh, I gotta
go to ups or Oh I gotta go to return
those Amazon I gotta go next day, I gotta go
(25:05):
return those million things to do, Gotta go return those
Oh I'll do it tomorrow. And you just keep procrastinating
that little thing every time you pass them. There's a
jolt of like that little min anxiety, right you go
into that little fight or flight mode, you know, And
what we want to do is you want to shift that.
Speaker 3 (25:21):
The second you take those boxes and you.
Speaker 4 (25:23):
Do the thing that isn't that you do, you do
it and you're like, oh, you walk by that spot,
and now you have calm, you have rest, you're in
digest you're not in this like fight or flight mode.
And you don't even realize sometimes how much that adds
up every single day, the weight you carry from not
doing the little things.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
It's so true.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
I literally, you know, for my job, I have to
do paperwork after and I hate it.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
That is like I'm a creative.
Speaker 1 (25:49):
I yes, the paperwork, the numbers, the whatever, and I'm
constantly putting it off, putting it off, even when it
is for me to get paid. Oh well wait till
the last minute. And my agent is always like, if
you would just do it, it would do away on you.
The second I sit down and do it, it is
like the biggest weight comes off my shoulders that I
(26:10):
didn't even.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
Realize was there.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Just like you're saying, like you feel l my day
to day, yes, I feel completely light. And then just
like you're saying, I will go do a bunch of
other activities because all of a sudden, I have all
this energy.
Speaker 3 (26:22):
Oh my god, I love that.
Speaker 4 (26:23):
Okay, So, Kelly, So what I would say to you
is you have to create a non negotiable. So every
time you do your podcast, I would schedule a I
don't know how long it takes you, but let's say
it's thirty minutes, thirty minute afterwards, and you include that
so it's just.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
Like you're here to the paperwork after just.
Speaker 3 (26:40):
Like you're here talking to me.
Speaker 4 (26:41):
It's non negotiable that directly after you fill that out,
it is that is your block half and that is
what you're going to do, and it's non negotiable, and
you will never discuss it again with yourself.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
Yeah, that is it?
Speaker 3 (26:51):
Like, that is what you're doing.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
Is I like, I don't schedule it. It's not on
a list anywhere, And I'm always like, oh, I gets it.
I'll get you know, but then I will I'll put
it off until it has.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
To and it weighs on you.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
Yes, it really really does. Okay, Well, I have to
talk to you about sleep because, as my listeners know,
I really struggle in that department and it's kind of
just been this ongoing thing my entire life. Tried basically everything,
(27:22):
but you give some sleep sleep hacks, and so I
have to talk about that with you. What are the
simplest ones that you think can make the biggest difference.
Speaker 4 (27:32):
Yes, And I am sorry that you struggle with that
because I can relate. And now I'm at a point
in my life where, Kelly, everybody that knows me, specifically
my two daughters, I'm like, don't mess with my sleep.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
Oh say you do?
Speaker 1 (27:46):
Not, Like it's that is self limits.
Speaker 4 (27:50):
Like, if it is going to mess with my sleep,
it is a no. It is all hard, hard, hell no,
because I know that how I need to function, and
I know what I want to feel like, I know
that if I don't get those hours in, it's not
a good thing for me. And at this point in
my life, anybody really anybody, but like you know, the
older you get, the more you realize, right, So so
for me it was interesting, you know, when I became
(28:13):
a mother, I realized how important routine was to sleep, right.
I crew, I was like one of those moms where
I'm like, oh, this is this child is going to
sleep ten hours by the time she's three months old,
you know. And I was, you know, a stickler for
the routine, and I made sure that you know, this
is the routine that followed. We had the milk, and
then we had the best and then we had the
(28:33):
story time, and then we had the rocket and then
we went to bed.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
And we didn't mess with that routine.
Speaker 4 (28:38):
Right. I had flexibility, like you still have a flexibility.
But that was the routine. And then you look at
our routines.
Speaker 3 (28:44):
What are they?
Speaker 2 (28:46):
Oh, it's different every day.
Speaker 4 (28:47):
We're gonna have a glass of wine, We're gonna go
out here.
Speaker 3 (28:51):
You scroll and look at everything that gives us anxiety
right before we go to bed, and there is zero,
zero directions, zero stress. You're showing up for ourselves. There's
a routine.
Speaker 4 (29:03):
And then we expect to just lull into this beautiful
slumber and have no thoughts that wake us up, and
then we have the most worst night of our lives
and it's like absolutely not. So my biggest thing is
my vice is I want you to show up for
your sleep, especially if it's someone if you're someone that
struggles with this, like you would prepare for the biggest.
Speaker 3 (29:22):
Meeting of your life.
Speaker 4 (29:23):
Okay, okay, you want to show up as if you
are going into that meeting prepared.
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Okay, so for you it might be different.
Speaker 4 (29:31):
I list a ton of different ways that you can
find that routine in the book. But you know, for me,
I take a bath every single night. I have a
red light little bed that I lay on, and I
and i'm i'm I let myself be bored. I don't
have the phone. I don't I mean, I watch TV,
but like my routine as I'm getting ready for bed,
no TV. I just have a certain thing that I do,
(29:52):
and I stretch every night and I breathe every night,
like that is non negotiable. I will not go to
bed without doing those things. And if I miss those things.
Speaker 3 (29:59):
Like if I do, I definitely don't sleep as good.
Speaker 4 (30:01):
I don't have the same night. I wake up in
the middle of the night with thoughts, you know, running
the world and running the show. And so I lean
into those principles, and I think everybody's routine might be
a little bit different. Again, I lay out a lot
of different strategies, but for me, the goal is to
find the routine that works for you and stick to
it and show up for it as you would the
most important meeting.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
Of your life.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
Such a good comparison to teaching a baby how to
sleep like hats hit, stay on a routine. And also
I love that you just said I let myself be bored.
I don't ever think that way. I never think you
need to just let yourself sit here and be bored.
Speaker 4 (30:37):
This is the problem we know, So I just say
breakfast every This is something else I talk about in
the book. Every first meal of the day. I make
sure my phone is nowhere near me, Okay, nowhere near me.
I let my mind wander. I let myself be bored,
I let myself think. I mean that is where creativity
is born, is in these in between moments when we're
(30:59):
not constantly stimmylated or something in front of us. When
I go for a walk every day, I don't necessarily
listen to a podcast, I don't.
Speaker 3 (31:05):
Put music in all ways. I let myself be bored.
Speaker 4 (31:08):
I think, I look, I have ideas, And honestly, that's
where most of my best ideas have been to come
is during those moments of boredom.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
Well you're moving and you're not distracting your mind with
something else. I just the second you said that, that
was the biggest epiphany for me, because I thought when
do I ever just allow myself to just be bored.
We're I constantly am filling my time, even if it's
just with scrolling or something. There's something happening, you know.
Speaker 4 (31:34):
So the next time you go to pick up your phone,
and you really don't have to, like there's no need.
It's simply just a you know, a means to not
be bored it. Put it down and just sit with
the thoughts. Just sit, go for a walk.
Speaker 3 (31:45):
Or just sit. Just sit and be bored for five
minutes and see what you think of.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
Got I mean, we're back to that. That's the big epiphany,
is to just sit and be bored. But that is
because our culture does not do that.
Speaker 4 (31:57):
We don't and I have that with my children. Well,
I constantly encourage that. You know, early on I heard
I read an article about lin Manuel Miranda, who is
the genius behind Hamilton right, and he credited his mother
and father for his He credited is youth for allowing
this creativity in him to grow because he said his
parents would work after school and him and his brother were,
(32:18):
you know, like like most kids like and I grew up,
we were just out in the yard.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Plane like go play. Yes, go play until dark.
Speaker 2 (32:24):
Always outside, right, always outside.
Speaker 3 (32:25):
Go play.
Speaker 4 (32:26):
And so that's what he did, and that's what he
said that that lack of constant stimulation, that moment of
having to be bored and figure out what to do
with that downtime is what, you know, really helped him
to create this incredible creative mindset. And that is what
we're lacking, both with children but also also with adults,
because we'll tell our kids get off your phone, but
(32:47):
we don't get off.
Speaker 2 (32:47):
Our friend right right. Oh my god, it's so true.
I mean, you really blow my mind with that one.
Speaker 4 (32:55):
I just bought a plate Kelly at this cute little
boutique in Dallas, and it's a play.
Speaker 3 (32:59):
It's this beautiful play flowers on it. It says get off
your phone.
Speaker 1 (33:02):
It's I mean, I need that in my mirrors everywhere. Yes,
it's just it's you know, it's so sad about it
to me is I don't even realize I'm doing it.
It is so like just a part of the motions
that I do. And actually I had a somatic therapist
tell me one time that that scrolling motion is a
way we're trying to calm our nervous system.
Speaker 4 (33:21):
Yes, my friend wrote Somatic book for Dummies, Christina, She's amazing,
and yes, correct, it is. It is this like trying
to find the calm our brain is going yeah, and
we're trying.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
To just like, but that's not the place to go calmer.
Speaker 4 (33:36):
No, it is not, which is why we need That's
why we need this book. Yes, because we need to
learn how to like relax and release. And yes, if
that is your one takeaway that would be the most
powerful takeaway honestly, is the next time you go to
grab your phone or the next time you said that's
why I think the first meal of to day is
my my pillar for that. It's like, just give yourself
that moment. I don't care if you fasten, your first
(33:58):
meal of the day is at noon or if it's
at seven in the morning, whenever it is.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
Put your phone away. Try to be bored.
Speaker 1 (34:03):
Try to be bored, yeah, because your big thing is like,
we don't need to be doing more like this idea
that it's just like, oh, if I just do that
next big thing, that's how we're gonna find our piece.
And you're like no, no, no, no, no, Either be bored
or maybe try to integrate these small practices that are short.
So is there one thing to any woman listening? Obviously,
(34:25):
for me, the being bored is the big takeaway for
me today that I'm going to start applying.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
But is there one that you.
Speaker 1 (34:31):
Really love that you feel like people would see a
change instantly kind of or that would you know the
change that's motivating to them.
Speaker 4 (34:38):
Yes, And it's something that we do every single day. Okay,
we are completely unaware of that. We have no idea
how powerful it is. And it's in our back pocket.
And that is intentional breathing. Intentional breathing. And I'm not
talking like sit down and you know, have a full
(34:59):
meditation series. I'm talking about quick thirty second to two
minute breathing series that is going to transform the way
your body and mind and mood feel. And it is
like that I did it as part of survival, truly.
Like I was holding onto a grocery cart walking down
the store, my knees rebuckling, my world was spinning.
Speaker 3 (35:17):
I was like, how the hell did I get here?
In my life? I did everything right? How am I here?
Speaker 4 (35:21):
And I remember just having this moment of like, breathe girl,
or you're going to faint? Yeah, And I just started
to breathe, and I continued to breathe.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
I bought this smudge spray. I was smudging and breathing
and smudging and spreading. I thought I felt like an idiot,
but I didn't care.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
Obviously, Yeah, you're just like whatever.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
And it just worked.
Speaker 4 (35:37):
And then I started doing more research on the power
of why why. It's it's scientifically proven to get your
body into a state of release, to come down from
that fight or flight, to get into the paris ofpathetic
system and to start to feel good again.
Speaker 3 (35:53):
And it's so crazy because.
Speaker 4 (35:55):
You don't need an app, you don't need to buy something,
you don't need to study learn all about It's not
going to take you years to become a master at it.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
It's just like that.
Speaker 4 (36:04):
You just start to learn it, apply it, and you
feel it immediately. It has changed my life, I mean
changed my life, and it is something I do every
single day with intention.
Speaker 1 (36:15):
Quick the second you said breathe, I realized I was
holding my breath. Isn't that wild? When we just walk
around like shoulders raised. I kind of will find myself
throughout the day having to remind us of no, take
a deep breath because I just hold myself to so tight.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
And I'm just moving, moving, move, movement, moving. You know,
you're not breathing, which is why.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
You're not breathing.
Speaker 4 (36:34):
And if you can learn how to breathe with intention,
you can really focus it on a longer exhalation and
getting that exhale out, releasing that carbon dioxide, getting into
that vegus nerve system, really focusing.
Speaker 3 (36:45):
On how you can just reset.
Speaker 4 (36:48):
I mean, if someone said to you, Kelly, here's a
pill that you can take this one, this pill, You
pop this pill and within two minutes you're gonna feel
completely different. If you're in like that state of anxiety,
you'd be like, right, no side effects, had.
Speaker 3 (37:02):
No side Yeah.
Speaker 4 (37:03):
But if someone said, oh, you have to actually intentionally breathe,
you'd be like, oh, that's so gimmicky, or that's gonna work,
or like whatever, you.
Speaker 3 (37:10):
Know what I mean, But we'd be quick to take
that pill.
Speaker 4 (37:13):
This is something that is you know, backed by science,
and it works, and it is an incredible tool that
we all have at our disposal. And once you become
somebody that does breath work, you never go back, Like
I send the car pool line, I do breathwork. If
I start to feel a cold coming on, I do breathwork.
Like if I start to feel anxiety coming on, I
do breathwork. I'm always trying to bring my body back
(37:33):
into that calm state and it truly, truly is transformative.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
Can you speak to the cold piece a little bit,
because I've had an energy worker tell me that to
She says she doesn't really her or her child. The
second they start to feel congested or whatever, she'll do
a breathwork session with them. And I've always wondered why
that happens. But is our energy giving us the cold?
Like stuck energy giving us the cold?
Speaker 4 (37:55):
Listen, there's no studies to back that up that I
have seen that I have seen, but a science behind
just the breathing on its own, regardless of what your
body is feeling in terms of a cold. When you
are functioning in this high state of energy, right, when
you're constantly in a state of anxiety, your body has
to work overload right just to maintain itself, just to
(38:16):
get through. When you can bring your body back down
to that calm parasympathetic nervous system state where you're not
you're not in that constant as I mentioned, fight or
flight mode. You're going to give your body what it
needs to function without it.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Okay, right, So that makes sense.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
So I start when I start to feel a cold
coming on or I feel like, you know, the lymph
node starts to pad the little skull and wherever it is,
I'm like, oh, girl, I got to lean into the
breath because clearly I'm I'm going something's going on with
my body.
Speaker 3 (38:43):
It's fighting some type of inflammation.
Speaker 4 (38:45):
I need to kind of bring it down as much
as I can into that calm state.
Speaker 3 (38:49):
And so for me, I have noticed.
Speaker 4 (38:51):
And again this may be placebo effect. I don't know
what it is, but for me, it has been, like
I said, transformative. I will sit in the arm like
driving because to school two days ago, I'm like, oh,
I feel like I might begin in a cold, and
let's start to breathe, and I focus on my breathing
far more over those few days.
Speaker 3 (39:08):
Now.
Speaker 4 (39:08):
Does it always prevent a cold? No, But I feel
like it does make a difference.
Speaker 3 (39:12):
I really do.
Speaker 1 (39:13):
Yeah. I mean that the way you just explain it
makes so much sense to me. So it's not that
the breath is like crying a cold. It's setting our
bodies up to be able to fight it off. I
feel like we forget how powerful and strong our bodies
are and how wired they are to heal themselves.
Speaker 3 (39:28):
Correct.
Speaker 4 (39:29):
So that's why you see again and again all these
studies coming out that says the number one thing that
you can.
Speaker 3 (39:33):
Do for your health is exercise. Why right? Why? I
mean it's very simple, think about it.
Speaker 4 (39:38):
The number one thing you can do to live a
longer life and a healthier life. Everybody will tell you
is to just move your body. Because we're meant to move,
We're meant to breathe and take full breaths.
Speaker 3 (39:49):
We're not meant to live in this state of constant.
Speaker 4 (39:52):
Rush of adrenaline anxiety, and you know, and that's how
we are. Like you set shoulders up, holding your breath
and you don't even realize it. And when you have
that realization, you just take a moment to become more
self aware.
Speaker 3 (40:04):
You start to just release some of that.
Speaker 4 (40:06):
You start to be the person that isn't holding their
shoulders and holding your breath.
Speaker 3 (40:09):
You're just able to kind of come into a different state.
It's still you, just a better version of you.
Speaker 2 (40:14):
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (40:15):
Well, the book, like we said, it's called Small Moves,
Big Life, Seven daily practices to supercharge your energy, productivity,
and happiness. As always, I'll put that in the description
of this podcast for you guys, Andrew, where else can
people find you?
Speaker 2 (40:29):
Follow you, work with you?
Speaker 4 (40:31):
Yes, A one, it's you, so on Instagram it's Andrea
Lee Rogers, l E I G h R O G
e R S. And then you can go to Small Moves,
Big life dot com. So there, if you purchase the book,
you can shoot me an email and all the information
is there and I'll send you a link to the
workout library as well as a stretching library as well.
Speaker 2 (40:49):
Amazing.
Speaker 1 (40:50):
Again, I'll put all of that in the description of
this podcast for you guys.
Speaker 2 (40:53):
Thank you so much. I really enjoyed this conversation.
Speaker 3 (40:56):
I love talking with you. That was great, Kelly, thank you.