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June 28, 2025 12 mins
Gary and Shannon swap hilarious behind-the-scenes stories from mistakenly wearing chocolate-stained pants, the challenges of sideline reporting in intense humidity, and an unfortunate experience at Knotts Berry Farm involving improperly dried pants.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is Gary and Shannon and you're listening to KFI
AM six forty, the Gary and Shannon Show on demand
on the iHeartRadio app.

Speaker 2 (00:08):
Hey, it's the Gas Weekend Fix.

Speaker 3 (00:10):
This is our weekend version of The Gary and Shannon Show. Obviously,
it's stuff that we wouldn't be able to necessarily say
on during the week during the.

Speaker 2 (00:20):
Rest of the week.

Speaker 1 (00:20):
So the problem with putting on pants and realizing that
there's chocolate stains on them is you have to live
your life in this day wearing these pants, but without
having had the benefit of eating the chocolate that you
spilled on your pants.

Speaker 2 (00:33):
It's old chocolate.

Speaker 1 (00:34):
It's old chocolate. It's not current chocolate. I haven't enjoyed
the chocolate.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
Well, and you walk around, When did you make this discovery?

Speaker 1 (00:42):
By the way, when I got into the car, car
because the house come pretty dark. And then I sit
in the car with the light coming and I look down,
I go, there's some chocolate stains on my crotch area
and your pants.

Speaker 2 (00:53):
You hope it's chocolate.

Speaker 3 (00:55):
I know it's chocolate, right, because you remember the last
time you were wearing those pants eating chocolate.

Speaker 2 (01:00):
Is it probably?

Speaker 3 (01:01):
OK?

Speaker 4 (01:02):
I eat a lot of chocolate.

Speaker 2 (01:03):
Ah, dark, both all the chocolate, all the chocolate.

Speaker 4 (01:07):
I do not discriminate it.

Speaker 3 (01:08):
Then you have to sit for the rest of your
day and think to yourself. Someone's going to believe that
I have shpited my pants?

Speaker 4 (01:14):
No, yes, No, it's on the front, it's right here.
How do you sit in the front of her?

Speaker 3 (01:18):
People get messy? Listen, you need to see you've never
changed the baby's dye.

Speaker 4 (01:23):
Forer hour usually go to a proctologist.

Speaker 3 (01:25):
If I'm blowing out like that. Yeah, but that's not
the most embarrassing thing that you've ever worn, I'm assuming, right.
I mean there have been things where you probably I
mean you've told stories about working sidelines at the Chargers
games in the early season when it's you know, ninety
five on the field in certain places and you get early.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
So this will be my eighth season on the sideline,
and you learn things just like you learn in every
other job. And my first season I was in Jacksonville
in August or September, and it was we call it
the swamp Ass Game as we refer to it. The
humidity off the charts, temperature, I mean, it was over

(02:06):
one hundred on the field, the humidity was freaking crazy,
and I was wearing a khaki skirt and sneakers and
the polo right the charter's polo, and you know, it
sounded like a like a good outsund on a you.

Speaker 4 (02:22):
Know, the business like business casual.

Speaker 1 (02:25):
But what I didn't account for was that my ass
was going to sweat through the skirt and because it's khaki,
you're gonna see the stain of the sweat. And so
what we did is we put a whole roll of
toilet paper paper towels from the locker room into the
tunnel that led out to the field, and I would

(02:46):
just go into the tunnel periodically and take a wad
of paper towels and just stick it on under my
skirt and just wipe my ass sweat off. So that
this was in the beginning of you know, the viral
moment of just people with their phones being as and
like our fear was that like I would sweat through

(03:06):
this skirt and then somebody in the stands would take
a picture of it, like you.

Speaker 3 (03:11):
Sweat through skirts, or somehow catch a glimpse of you
with handfuls of paper towels up the backside and.

Speaker 1 (03:18):
The tunnel no one can see you. So that's why
we put the towels in there. It's a safe space
in the tunnel.

Speaker 3 (03:25):
I will choose shorts and undercarriage garments based on the
potential for sweat.

Speaker 4 (03:32):
On your ass.

Speaker 2 (03:33):
Yeah, I mean when you get warmer, when it.

Speaker 1 (03:36):
Definitely when God blesses you with what you're working with. Yeah,
you've got to be careful about its sweating because it's
gonna sweat.

Speaker 3 (03:42):
Well, listen, everybody's gonna it draws attention to itself anyway, Right.
I wouldn't want somebody, let's say I'm I'm at Universal
Studios or something.

Speaker 4 (03:52):
Like that, where everyone's already looking at.

Speaker 2 (03:54):
Your ass, right right, pretty common?

Speaker 4 (03:57):
Sure, I wouldn't. I mean, how could they not?

Speaker 2 (03:58):
How could they not? I wouldn't want them.

Speaker 3 (04:00):
But if you're wearing and I found this out through
trial and error, if you're wearing tidy whities for me,
not for everybody. If you're wearing briefs of some kind
that will keep whatever back sweat that turns into crack
sweat away from your outer garment, your your short or pants.

Speaker 1 (04:19):
So I should shove some underwear with a strong waistband.

Speaker 3 (04:23):
It's not the waistband it's that the fabric is closer
to your bottom.

Speaker 4 (04:28):
Do you own tidy whities?

Speaker 3 (04:30):
They're not tidy whities, but I own boxer briefs. Okay,
so that so they're they're tighter version. There's a lot
of sorry with my.

Speaker 1 (04:36):
Hand out with your hand, I'm cupping both hands your
own as with your hand cheek age. Yeah. I remember
being a kid and going to Universal Studios and being
like so excited and then like I wonder, like if
I'm going to see Jaws. I wonder if I'm going
to see a fifty two year old guy in his ass,
Like I remember that.

Speaker 2 (04:54):
Yeah, well you should have gone sometime in The.

Speaker 4 (04:58):
Most takeaway is no one's looking at.

Speaker 2 (05:01):
Your ass again.

Speaker 3 (05:03):
I mean you, I appreciate that you think it just
goes unnoticed, but I mean, I'll be honest, it doesn't.
So that I've told you the trash pant story though,
right you speaking of I mean you were talking about
you spilled on your on your pants chocolate and I
love that you're still hiding.

Speaker 4 (05:21):
It's funny, yeah, a little bit.

Speaker 3 (05:22):
And this morning I actually did a dribbled take with
my coffee for some reason, like my lips went um
at the moment I tried.

Speaker 1 (05:29):
To you just start drooling. Get whatever you're putting in there,
it just comes out.

Speaker 2 (05:35):
But it well, part of it is I have a
black coffee cup.

Speaker 4 (05:39):
So that part of the problem.

Speaker 2 (05:40):
Well, this is what this is what I've determined.

Speaker 3 (05:43):
So I have a black coffee cup, so I can't
when I when I'm lifting it to my mouth, your
brain does that quick take of how much liquid is
actually in there, so you know when to adjust your
lips for complete coffee intake. I misscalculated and it hit
my lips too quickly and I dribbled. So anyway, I

(06:04):
have this little I have like dribbled coffee on the
top of my like on the neck of my T shirt.
So now I'm constantly reminded of what a moron I
am because I can smell like dirty diner or whatever
that whatever old.

Speaker 4 (06:17):
Coffee smells way too hard on yourself.

Speaker 1 (06:19):
But the fact that you've spilled a little bit of
coffee does not make you a moron. If you want
to talk about what makes you a moron, I'm here.
There's other things that ain't it. But I'm wearing a
dark T shirt and a dark shirt over that.

Speaker 2 (06:32):
So you can't like.

Speaker 1 (06:33):
You can't see, which is great if it was a
white T shirt.

Speaker 3 (06:40):
Was we went to We went to Knotsberry Farm one time,
myself and my wife and the family.

Speaker 4 (06:47):
And how did you prepare for your ass?

Speaker 3 (06:50):
Well, here's the thing I wanted. I was gonna wear
it amusement. I grabbed a pair of jeans out of
there and threw them on and we went and we
drove down. It's going to be a cold night to
Nottsbury Farm and nighttime. It's December ish, right, so it's

(07:10):
one of those times when the radio station gets late
entry and we can stay late kind of thing. And
the kids had never been to Knotsbury Farm, so this
is our first opportunity to go and take them. And
I mean they're whatever thirteen and ten or something like that.
And late later into the evening, the humidity goes way

(07:30):
up down and Wayne to park down in Orange County,
So at night it's starting to get a little cool
and it almost feels like the fog is rolling in.
Now that only that only makes things worse in this story,
because we're a couple hours in and I start to
notice that every once in a while we'd pass something

(07:52):
garbage can floor drained something and it smelled funny, and
I was like.

Speaker 2 (07:59):
This is the weirdest.

Speaker 3 (08:00):
There's something going on here that they are not They
not spury from that they're not aware of. Like something's
backed up and it should be taken care of. So
we get into one line for it.

Speaker 2 (08:13):
Not awful, just something is off. Something is off.

Speaker 3 (08:18):
And it's not raw sewage or anything that I've smelled,
you know, sewer lines back up, that's not what it was.
But something was was gone, something was rotten kind of.
So we're in this line to get I don't remember
what ride it was, but I remember there's a section
of the line.

Speaker 2 (08:34):
Where, uh, you walk.

Speaker 3 (08:36):
Up a pretty steep staircase. So depending on where you
are and the person behind you is, their face is
at pant level for you, and in this case, my
son was at pant level for me. I'm in front
of line, I'm in front of him in line as
we're headed up these stairs and he's like, Dad, nobody

(08:59):
else could smell this. By the way, I kept saying,
do you guys smell that? Nobody smelled anything. My son
finally goes Dad, yeah, I can smell it. Well, right,
it's right, there's something.

Speaker 2 (09:14):
We look around.

Speaker 3 (09:14):
There's like a trash can over there, because the people
throw stuff away while they're in life.

Speaker 4 (09:18):
What did you do in your pants?

Speaker 2 (09:20):
So here's what Here's what happened.

Speaker 3 (09:22):
I had pulled the pants out of the dryer too soon,
so they weren't completely dry.

Speaker 4 (09:29):
My vomit.

Speaker 3 (09:30):
Oh you moldy as Yeah, So whatever happens in the
process of life. Over the course of several hours of
wearing these jeans that weren't completely.

Speaker 4 (09:41):
Dry, you could smell it.

Speaker 2 (09:43):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, again it was.

Speaker 3 (09:45):
It wasn't like no one else in line, I don't
think could smell anything. And my wife and kids were
with me all night. They didn't smell anything until my
son was right there. So I do this thing where
I'm standing in line and I oh my oh no,
and I'm like trying to smell Remember that other day
when you were like smell my pants? This is this

(10:06):
is this is what it reminded me of it. I
leaned down and I was like, you guys, it's me.
I'm the problem. So we only we were late in
the night. Anyway, we did a couple more things. They
walked well in front of me, so they.

Speaker 1 (10:21):
Didn't have to smell pants off at that moment. As
I get you should have taken your pants off.

Speaker 3 (10:25):
I walk out to the car. They followed me a
good hundred yards behind me. I take my pants off
in the parking lot at that's very farm, stash them
in the trunk, and drive home in my boxer shorts.

Speaker 2 (10:37):
Yeah, that night and the.

Speaker 1 (10:39):
Next day, did you get a discount for both the
kids going into therapy or no?

Speaker 2 (10:43):
Two for one.

Speaker 3 (10:44):
We had a couple of coupons anyway from other stuff.
So yeah, that's my trash.

Speaker 4 (10:48):
Oh my god, I can't believe you drove home literally
in your underwear.

Speaker 2 (10:51):
It was twelve thirty at night.

Speaker 3 (10:53):
No, I know.

Speaker 4 (10:53):
I mean that was the right thing to do, right,
You had to.

Speaker 2 (10:59):
That's that's what a father does.

Speaker 1 (11:01):
How often do you just wear your underwear? I feel
like you have a number of stories that involve you
in just your underwear.

Speaker 2 (11:10):
You've never worn just your underwear? Yeah, okay, enough, that's
the end of the story.

Speaker 1 (11:15):
On the road to putting the rest of my clothes on. Like,
I wore just my underwear this morning as I was
putting my pants on.

Speaker 2 (11:23):
For a short amount of time.

Speaker 1 (11:24):
Yeah, I feel like you live your life like sections
of your life and just your underwear, which is fine.

Speaker 4 (11:30):
I just is that? Is that right? Is that accurate?

Speaker 2 (11:33):
Yes?

Speaker 4 (11:33):
Okay?

Speaker 3 (11:35):
And that.

Speaker 2 (11:37):
Is the Gas Weekend fixed.

Speaker 3 (11:38):
I didn't need to follow us on every social media
platform at Gary and Shannon. Also check out all of
the podcasts. We post them every single day and some
surprises on the weekends. When you find your favorite podcast
app we like iHeartRadio, make sure you just type in
Gary and Shannon our picture comes up, subscribe to the podcast,
rate the podcast, comments on the podcast, and most importantly,

(12:00):
share the pod.

Speaker 1 (12:01):
You know, when you go on vacation with your family,
you're gonna you know, in a week or so, you're
gonna have to put panson.

Speaker 2 (12:09):
Probably not. You've been listening to the Gary and Shannon Show.

Speaker 3 (12:13):
You can always hear us live on KFI AM six
forty nine am to one pm every Monday through Friday,
and anytime on demand on the iHeartRadio app.

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