August 26, 2025 • 35 mins
#WHATSHAPPENING / #TrueLoveTuesday – George and Tondra Gregory: ‘The Marriage Game Plan’
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is Gary and Shannon and you're listening to KFI
A M. Six forty, the Gary and Shannon Show on
demand on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
A lot of us already know that drinking water is
essential to staying healthy, essential than is. A new research
suggests how much water you drink each day could affect
how your body reacts to stress. Interesting the lab experiment,
young adults who typically drank less than a leader and
a half of water every day had a much bigger
spike in the stress hormone cortisol.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
How you drink four leaders leader and a half is
fifty one ounces. You got thirty fours, right, so that's
like about one and a half one and a half
smart waters.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Yeah, so if you drink less than a leader and
a half, you're more likely to see a spike in
cortisol compared to those who drank four leaders.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
Okay, so three of those basically I drink.
Speaker 4 (00:59):
I try to drink three day, So about.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Fifty five percent stronger stress response just from the differences
in the fluid that you take in every single day.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
Where are you finding this item?
Speaker 3 (01:09):
You don't need to do everything?
Speaker 4 (01:10):
Well, I need to send it.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
I've got a couple of friends who do not drink
water at all, drives me in saying.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
You know, we also went through our first probably I
would argue forty to forty five years of our lives
not drinking water.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Never drank water. We drank it out of the hose
or the water fountain. Yeah, never saw a bottle. I
remember what I.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Saw much lead intake as I did h two oz intake.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Yeah, yeah, exactly, and you turned out stop it basically perfectly.
Speaker 4 (01:39):
What else is going on?
Speaker 3 (01:43):
Time for what's happening?
Speaker 1 (01:47):
Well, you know what's happening, and the engagement heard around
the world. Not only did I have every news source
give me an alert to every sports news source light
up my phone.
Speaker 3 (01:59):
I want to pull out. I was the one who
pointed it out. You were I was.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
He calmly points up at Good Day La and says, huh,
they got engaged.
Speaker 4 (02:09):
They got engaged, and I said what?
Speaker 1 (02:14):
And then Michael Monks wanted to know if we were
going to break into the commercial.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Trake and asked at least four people Blane had gone
down Summer and downtown. Hold on, no, we're not going
to break it, Lord, Taylor Swift, Travis Kelsey, engaged after
about two years of dating.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
We don't know exactly when it took place.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
A lot of my alerts said finally in like two
years and nothing really right.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
I mean, I guess it's kind of part of the course.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
But her Ralph Lauren black and white striped dress she
wore in the pictures sold out four hundred dollars dress.
The ballpark estimate, according to one jeweler in New York City,
puts that ring in about five hundred and fifty thousand dollars.
Speaker 5 (02:57):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
If you remember how in love he was right at
the beginning in November of twenty three, said I've never
dated anyone with that kind of aura about them. I've
never dealt with it. But at the same time, I'm
not running away from it.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
That was two years ago.
Speaker 4 (03:12):
They both have a way with words, they really do.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
They talk about each other in what used to be
Hallmark card language. Cards are garbage now, but they used
to do a good job. And those two are really
effusive and they.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
Are maybe it is real, and maybe they will.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
They say about each other are beautiful. All right.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
We've talked about this all summer because the heat failed
to materialize, and we are going to have a warmer fall.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
We knew it was going to happen, and it's going
to happen.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration forecasts whether parts of the
country are going to be above, below, or near average
for parts of the meteorological fall, which for them is
September through November, and they said that places like Arizona,
New Mexico may be above sort of, the Arizona California
(04:05):
border would be slightly above, and then most of California
will also be just a couple of degrees above normal
average for the fall ps.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
We may have thunderstorms and flash flooding in the mountains
and deserts. Yesterday, the thunderclouds over the San Gabriel Mountains,
they were massive, they were insane. So anyway, yeah, in
rain downtown LA on Friday or on Saturday a little
bit as well, apparently, so.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
The mountains can expect thunderstorms and about a sixty percent
chance for flash floods.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
California's best high schools, let's see, let's get into it.
Number one comes to us from Cerritos, not just known
for its auto mall, is it no? Whitney High School?
Number one in California and number sixteen around the country.
That's pretty amazing. In Cyprus, Oxford Academy number two.
Speaker 4 (05:05):
I had no idea. I've never heard of these places.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
The Science Academy Stem Magnet School in North Hollywood is
number three. Again, these are the California's best high schools.
Number four, Doctor Richard Vladovich, Harbor Teacher Prep Academy in Wilmington, California,
Academy of Math and Science, and Carson almost all well,
at least the top five six. They're all Southern California.
(05:28):
Riverside Stem Academy and Riverside is number six. University High
School in the Fresneck is number seven.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Doctor T.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
J Owens Gilroy Early College Academy in Gilroy number eight,
Pacific Collegiate Charter in Santa Cruz nine, and lynn Brook
High School up in San Jose is number ten.
Speaker 4 (05:46):
All right, McDonald's, is that in a new sauce?
Speaker 3 (05:51):
What is it?
Speaker 4 (05:53):
It's I'm glad you asked.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
It is called the Special Edition Gold Sauce, the tangy
blend of North Carolina style vinegar barbecue with notes of honey, smoke,
and mustard. Give me a spoonful that sounds delicious. It'll
be available on the side or featured on four chicken items,
among them the special Edition Gold Snack Wrap, which includes
(06:17):
mc crispy strips, shredded lettuce, cheese, new sauce. We've also
got two new sandwiches at McDonald's, the Bacon Special Edition
Gold mccrispy Me Too, I would eat that right.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
And the Deluxe counterpart, both of them served on potato
toasted potato rolls. Apple would smoke bacon toasted potato Deluxe
version adds the lettuce and the tomato.
Speaker 4 (06:37):
Holy hell, all right.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
The future of retirement planning wealth management is here La
Trajan Wealth Call Today at three one oh two nine
nine ninety nine sixty Trajan Wealth, of course, brings us
your trending stories every single day. Up next the decisions
when it comes to the governor's race, the upheaval. Perhaps
that Alex Padilla could, if he threw his hat in
the woo, we'd have a real barn Burner.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Barn Berner. That's what we're here for.
Speaker 6 (07:07):
You're listening to Gary and Shannon on demand from KFI
AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
Best selling authors coming in who have written a book
on the marriage game plan. I mean, does it get
more universe connected to us than this providential? I mean
a literal NFL chaplain and his wife are coming in
to talk marriage with us on a day that a
star in the NFL is engaged to be married to
(07:37):
the biggest pop star in the world.
Speaker 4 (07:40):
We are connected, Elmer.
Speaker 5 (07:41):
That's what the show is.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
Synchronous, we do.
Speaker 5 (07:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:44):
Would that count as a third strike the third hit
or no? It's just a combination. Yeah, first.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Okay, so the race for governor is still very very
far away, but it is closer than you think. Maybe
is that the right way to put in sure? About
four and ten registered voters responded to a poll saying
they have absolutely no flip and clue who they're going
to vote for next November when it comes to the
governor of the state of California.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
I forget that. It is just next November.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Yeah, I mean, yes, next November is how you say it?
This November is this November would be this new se
November and next November has got it. Yes, you're right.
So among those who did have a preference, those four
and ten said they had no idea. Among those who
do have a preference, we talked about this last week,
Katie Porter is the one who comes in as the
(08:38):
top choice. She gets about seventeen percent of people who
say they have made a choice. Arguably it's because she's
got the name recognition. Remember she did run for Senate
and lost, but she's got name recognition. She was also
a member of Congress and lost, and now she's got
the name recognition. On the other side of that, Chad
(08:59):
Beyond the Republican the only other candidate who got double
digit support, with a backing of about ten percent of respondents.
That would be relatively good news for him. The only
other Republican of name that has any sort of name
recognition is Steve Hilton.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
He comes in farther down.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
But the Democrats have so many people right now saying
that they want to run for governor that that's going
to end up splitting up that vote. So as of
right now, the top candidates. The other top candidates out
after Katie Porter and Chad Bianco former Health and Human
Services Secretary, Javier Bisera former mayor, and Tonio Viragosa, former
(09:41):
state legislative leader. Tony Adkins, the current Superintendent Public Instruction,
Tony Thurman, then former Controller Betty Yee, businessman Stephen Klubec,
conservative commentator, sorry, commentator Steve Hilton.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
I can only imagine that they are saving money for
the know the next year, and that's why we've heard
nothing about any of them. Really, I mean, they don't
want to blow it too quick, I guess. But you
want to plan your your horse race correctly. You don't
want to jump out of the gate and then fade
into the back when you run out of money.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
And but but if getting that getting that bump now
may make everybody else fade away quicker, I don't know.
I mean, like, for example, we talked about when Kamala
Harris announced that she was not going to run for governor,
that was a huge fundraising boon for Katie Porter. Again
because she's in the in the lead, probably has the
(10:36):
most name recognition, et cetera. But if she's able to
cobble together something quickly now and get her name out there,
I mean she's I've seen her interviewed on a handful
of cable TV shows cable networks, so she's available and
out there.
Speaker 5 (10:51):
But is it.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
Have you watched those of you listened to them?
Speaker 2 (10:54):
I no, okay, for I mean for multiple reasons, one
of which is I don't care what they have to
say yet.
Speaker 3 (11:01):
I mean I don't.
Speaker 4 (11:03):
I just want to see what her message is appealing to.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
I'd like to see what she has to say at
this stage being the front runner, and how she handles that.
Speaker 4 (11:15):
Because I had had enough of her.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
She would come on this show.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
I know of that, and I don't want to roll
out there.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
I don't want for any of these people at this
point to your point of it's too early.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
I mean, if it gets to a point, I would.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
Have like a number of them on and maybe a
couple like a Democrat and a Republican to kind of debate.
But I'm not a big fan of being a show
that just has politicians on to get in the chair
and go blah blah blah blah blah blah blah wah
wah wah wah wah, and just tell people what they
want them to hear, the talking points and all that.
(11:51):
I don't like being a platform for that. If they
can do, if they can come on here and debate
the issue with someone who is opposed to them, and
they can have a thoughtful conversation about it and move
away from whatever the talking points are. I'm happy to
do that, but just like offering up people room to
blather is But.
Speaker 5 (12:08):
That's what.
Speaker 3 (12:10):
Of course lately has been that.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Yeah, I mean it has been the say a few keywords,
throwing the you know, the name of the boogeyman that
you think is the worst person in the other party
or whatever, and then that's it.
Speaker 3 (12:24):
No actual arguments about what's going.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
On, right, I mean, if they want to come in
here and we could talk about you know, pizza or
you know, things that are not politics, that would be
kind of be fun. Okay, just invite the politicians in
and then bar them from bringing up anything political to
talk about you know, you know, movies and pizza and pizza.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
I'm starting to sense a theme here.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Well, pizza is not controversial.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
It depends where you are. You're in Chicago or in
New York, and you bring up pizza like the other
city it's controversial.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Well, I wouldn't do that, you know, I think that
everyone supports a type of pizza. I don't know why
you're making a controversial I don't know why you're injecting
controversy into pizza. And this is why I can't bring
in politicians with you up.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
Next True Love Tuesday. Everything's a fight the authors of
the Marriage Game Plan, developing a winning strategy for marital success.
You're your anniversary is tomorrow? Is it why you want
to bring.
Speaker 4 (13:31):
The Keana schedule this?
Speaker 1 (13:33):
I said that George and Tondra are experts and we
should have them in for a True Love Tuesday, and
she happened to book it on the day that Taylor
Swift and Travis Kelcey got engaged.
Speaker 5 (13:44):
Brilliant.
Speaker 3 (13:44):
That's how it works. Gary and Shannon will get I mean, sometimes.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
She's Keanna when she's yelling, and then she's Keana, and
then she's Kiky. She's got three different personnelity. She's like
Charles Haley. Yeah, I'm sure there's sweet, exactly sweet Keana,
and then there's Keana who doesn't mess around, and then
there's Kiki.
Speaker 4 (14:04):
And we'll learn about that coming up later in the week.
Speaker 6 (14:08):
You're listening to Gary and Shannon on demand from KFI
AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
We do love love and once in a while we
throw in a True Love Tuesday and it just happens,
so the stars aligned. Travis and Taylor must have heard
us talking about our guests today and decided let's just
publicize the engagement.
Speaker 7 (14:27):
Right.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
George and Tondra Gregory, they are chaplains in the NFL.
They've worked with the Giants, They've worked with the Jets.
They've said a lot of prayers, y'all. They do work
with the La Chargers now and they are best selling authors.
They have written the Marriage game Plan, developing a winning
strategy for marital success. This is on the top of
the chart USA today. And how cool is it that
(14:52):
you'll spend some time. You've been on Good Morning America,
You've been on all of the shows, and you've spent
some time for us, and we really appreciate it.
Speaker 5 (15:00):
Thank you guys for having us.
Speaker 8 (15:02):
I love I love that True Love Tuesday. It's a
nice ring.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
Tell us about your your love story. I mean you
you guys mentioned outside that we're thirty years married.
Speaker 5 (15:12):
Thirty years that's right, that's right.
Speaker 7 (15:13):
We met in college biology one o one, first day
of class and I was, you know, looking at anatomy.
Speaker 8 (15:22):
Yes, and it is true that we met in biology,
but we had a lot of the same classes that
particular year, and we just kept seeing each other in
the same classes.
Speaker 7 (15:33):
Tundra went and changed their schedule to reflect my classes.
Speaker 5 (15:37):
And she was happy.
Speaker 8 (15:38):
He says that I went and signed up for all
of his classes once I saw him in biology. But
that but that part he's he's made that up. That's
his truth, but it's not the truth.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Is that part of the marriage game plan? That that
verbia is right there of that's your trip.
Speaker 5 (15:58):
Perspective?
Speaker 4 (15:59):
Is that part of it?
Speaker 6 (16:00):
Yes?
Speaker 8 (16:01):
Is you can't assume the truths. You got to get
on the same page and create our truth. That's what
it's got to be. So how did this start?
Speaker 1 (16:09):
How did it start that you started working for teams
as chaplains?
Speaker 5 (16:13):
Yeah, well, really.
Speaker 7 (16:14):
When we moved to New York City, we planted a
church in New York City, and we were trying to
figure out how does as a church plan do we
get out of the four walls? And so we started
doing pre marriage counseling for couples who were just living
together and didn't know how to do marriage, but they
were trying to act like they were married. And we
created an organization called Journey for Life. That's our marriage organization.
(16:37):
And the New York Jets was the first company to
call us, and they said, we need help with our marriages,
and so that's how we kind of got our start
with just an entry way, and then we just through
relationships and networking. We met coach Anthony Lynn and he
came to that church that we planted, and who knew
that a few years later he was going to move
(16:58):
out here. We were moving out of New York. Somebody
reintroduced us as a possibility and he looks at resumes
and he says, hey, this is my pastor and his wife.
There are no interviews. If he wants the role, he's
got the role. So I didn't even move out to
LA before before I talked to him. I moved out
in faith because they connected us then, and that's how
(17:20):
we got here.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
It's interesting that you said the Jets contacted you. The
organization knew that they needed help with a very personal thing,
which is the marriages of the people in the group
in the organization.
Speaker 5 (17:32):
That's right.
Speaker 7 (17:33):
It was their team chaplain, right, and so so you
see us as a chaplain pair duo. Sandra's a licensed therapist.
So when you get us, you get like a total package.
But not all chaplains in the NFL come equip to
do what we do, and that's not disparaging anyone. It
just really highlights what the la Chargers have right. And
(17:53):
so when they called, we were ready to go because
we've been doing this for so long and Tandra, through
our thirty years of marriage, she's told me how many
times I get it wrong, that I know how to
help couples.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
And you listen to that and you hear her say that,
of course, yeah, of course. So the game plan, the
marriage game plan, this is the book developing a winning
strategy for marital success. Is it one game plan for everybody?
Or does each couple come up kind of with their
own game plan?
Speaker 4 (18:22):
How does it work?
Speaker 8 (18:23):
Yes, each couple comes up with their own game plan
because every marriage is unique.
Speaker 9 (18:28):
It's made up of two unique individuals.
Speaker 8 (18:31):
And everybody has to have a different game plan because
you got different personalities, you have different dynamics, different experiences.
So each couple needs to work together to develop their
unique game plan. And that's what our book does. It
helps couples lay out their unique game plan.
Speaker 5 (18:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (18:50):
Yeah, So there's marriage books that tell you sort of
this objective truth and you say, well, man, that means
is this for everyone?
Speaker 5 (18:58):
Our book is not like that.
Speaker 7 (18:59):
What we do is we give you a lot of
things like filling the blank exercises. Right after every chapter,
there's a putting it in a practice practice section and
in that section there's questions you answer and couple's activities, right,
so you're doing the work together.
Speaker 5 (19:15):
It's very interactive.
Speaker 7 (19:16):
And then we also have a QR code that you
can scan that you'll get a five minute coaching from
the coaches Tandra and I get. They'll take you to
a video of us coaching. So what this is is
is not just a marriage book that you read, but
it's a marriage book that you experience and you develop
your very own game plan by how you answer the questions.
(19:37):
And then you get the chapter ten and we walk
you how to how to put it all together.
Speaker 4 (19:41):
So it's like I could choose your own adventure book.
Speaker 9 (19:44):
Yeah, that's right, that's right.
Speaker 7 (19:46):
If you're if you're a man or woman enough to
go down the adventure of putting uh to to explore,
then we will help you develop your very own unique
marriage game.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
Oh that's cool, and I would assume that, I mean
you obviously it would be great if people started their
marriages with something like this, at least this discussion, but
it would pertain to people I don't know me twenty
seven years into marriage.
Speaker 7 (20:10):
Sure, Well, we didn't start off with a game plan
at all. In fact, that's why we wrote the marriage
game Plan, because thirty years ago, when we first started off,
our first two years was hell, can I get an amen?
Speaker 9 (20:22):
Amen?
Speaker 5 (20:23):
Okay?
Speaker 9 (20:24):
I was there too, yeah.
Speaker 7 (20:26):
Yeah, but sometimes when I tell that, they don't hear
your part. It's like that I'm just saying, oh no, no, no.
It was because we didn't have a game plan, right.
We come from different backgrounds, you know, we didn't know
how to communicate well with each other. I mean, Tandra
just thought I looked like Denzel, so she thought checked
the box.
Speaker 5 (20:42):
I'm good.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
I was just those eyes and.
Speaker 7 (20:47):
Like I said, biology one on one, I was attracted
to the anatomy already. But people need more than just
an attraction to really have a successful game plan. So
we know this personally. So years later, in hindsight, we thought,
if we'd have had a game plan, we would have
probably enter into marriage more prepared. And so that's what
we that's why we wrote this book is because we
(21:09):
will not only married couples, but pre marriage so also
get a marriage game plan.
Speaker 5 (21:13):
Because it definitely helps.
Speaker 9 (21:16):
And you never too.
Speaker 8 (21:19):
Far out or in such a place where it's just
never too late to get a marriage game plan. It
doesn't matter where you are on your journey, in the beginning, middle,
tough times, good times, it's just never a bad time
to work on a marriage game plan. Marriage is hard
work and it's a journey, and it's ever evolving and
ever growing. And even with the chapter ten developing your
(21:43):
game plan, we wrote it so that you can come
back to it and adjust it as life happens and
you need to make adjustments to your game plan. So
it's not like a one and done document. It's an
ever evolving document.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
I want to talk to you guys about I think
a lot of couples feel like if they're going to
get a book like this, or they're going to go
through these exercises, and that means they're admitting that their
marriage is in trouble.
Speaker 5 (22:05):
Oh no.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
And I want to talk about how that's kind of
taboo and how I mean, if you really care and
you're it's it doesn't have to be work, you know,
in the sense of the word, but that that's just
not true. It just kind of shows that you care
to kind of check in with each other.
Speaker 5 (22:18):
Well, we're talking. We know this. Go ahead, sorry, we
know this. Ye is that pros still practice? Right?
Speaker 7 (22:25):
And if pros at an elite level still think they
have to practice, then what do we do as average couples?
Speaker 5 (22:30):
We need to practice as well? This is an exercise
about practice.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
I think Alan Iverson is the only one who didn't
like practice, is the only one we're talking with George
and Tondre Gregory. The Marriage game Plan is the name
of the book. Will continue with our True Love Tuesday
when we come back.
Speaker 6 (22:46):
You're listening to Gary and Shannon on demand from KFI
AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Ooh, what's their wedding song going to be? Guys, Taylor
and Travis.
Speaker 3 (22:57):
Don't it's a John Mayer song.
Speaker 4 (22:59):
I think it's didn't she date him?
Speaker 5 (23:01):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (23:02):
Okay, then that's that's that's that's a limits.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
That's not funny. You're not respecting the love. We're talking
with George and Tondrack Gregory. They are the best selling
authors of The Marriage game Plan. You can find it
anywhere you find really anything. You know how to you
know how to buy this stuff and have it by
your at your door by the afternoon Amazon wherever you know.
(23:25):
I googled it, came up with it. It can be
at my uh my door this afternoon.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
Ask your question because I thought of another one while you.
Speaker 4 (23:31):
Were just my question.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
So you bring up then you've worked in the NFL
as chaplains in both coasts, and you brought up Anthony Lynn.
Anthony Lynn's wife, if I'm not mistaken, worked in New
York while he was in LA. That's a challenging situation
in the NFL. Marriages are tough. Guys are gone a lot.
I would imagine your phones ring all the time from
(23:55):
wives and from the husband's of how do I keep
her happy? How do I keep him home? Like all
things sure, it's a very busy thing. How often is
your phone ringing?
Speaker 5 (24:04):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (24:04):
Well, I mean it rings constantly, right, because we like,
just like an NFL coach, right, we're marriage coaches, So
we're always coaching, We're always encouraging, we're always you know,
I don't want to say babysitting, but we're always We're
always there, right, and sometimes that's hard, but it's really
rewarding in a sense that because we've been married thirty years,
(24:26):
it helps us to give back it helps us to remember, Hey,
remember we were in that particular place, and really it
helps us to celebrate where we've come from.
Speaker 5 (24:34):
But man, you.
Speaker 9 (24:36):
Yeah, I would just add, yes, that it's a busy schedule.
It's very demanding.
Speaker 8 (24:41):
It's a unique set of circumstances, and even couples who
don't have this highest.
Speaker 9 (24:47):
Level of pressure, marriage can be difficult.
Speaker 8 (24:50):
So I do think it's important for us to come
along with the couples to help them lay the foundation
while they're in the league, because the divorce rate outside
of the league is around after retirement is around seventy percent, wow,
And so they cannot wait to work on their relationship.
It's something that has to be implemented as they're on
(25:12):
this journey so that they have the foundation to continue
to build their family and marriage after they are no longer.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
Why is that so high?
Speaker 8 (25:21):
I just I think it's the pressures of the lifestyle,
of having a nomadic lifestyle, you know, in football. In
the NFL, football is king, it's the priority. I find
that a lot of times wives don't want to mess
up their husband's game, right, and so you don't want
(25:42):
to bring up any issues.
Speaker 9 (25:43):
So I find that so they.
Speaker 4 (25:44):
Sit on it and then then time and everything comes up.
Speaker 9 (25:47):
Yeah, so you just never really get to go ahead.
Speaker 7 (25:49):
And then I've heard from a lot of former players
that man that so now I'm home, I'm less busy,
and we don't know each other because we weren't proactive.
Speaker 5 (25:59):
And so here's that's what we know. No one gets
married to lose.
Speaker 7 (26:03):
We all want to win in our relationship, right, and
so we tell our pros. Unless you want to be
a part of the statistic, then you have to be
proactive instead of reactive. Being proactive is now, get a coach,
learn to do it, get our book right, go through
marriage retreats or getaways. But handle what you need to
handle now and that's what's in front of you and
(26:25):
not plan for what is to come later.
Speaker 5 (26:27):
Right.
Speaker 8 (26:28):
Yeah, And I think that's why our role as chaplains
and marriage coaches is so important because I do think
even with the high profile lifestyle, you don't know who
you can trust.
Speaker 9 (26:39):
And marriage is.
Speaker 8 (26:40):
A private thing. Whether you on a high platform or not.
People don't want you in their business. They don't know
if they can trust you, and so just making sure
they have those trusted people that they can come to
us and talk about the unique challenges they may be
facing in their relationship, and we create that safe space
to help them work through it. Because no one can
(27:00):
really walk through marriage and figure it out all by themselves.
Speaker 9 (27:03):
We all need help.
Speaker 7 (27:04):
Well, we say to people, don't die in the sea
of lifeguards. There's so much help out here for couples.
But yet sometimes people drown in that ocean because they
don't want to call out or they don't want to
wave their hand. And yet we say, if you're married
and you're struggling to day, reach out, don't die in
a sea of life.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Well, like Shannon said, I mean, I think for a
lot of people, they assume that that it's going to
be looked at as they it's an acknowledgment that their
marriage is failing or it's not great or whatever, and they.
Speaker 3 (27:30):
Don't want to do that.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
Sure, well, I was going to ask the title of
the book game Plan makes it sound like it's an
overarching thing. You know, you started early, you continually kind
of update this plan and it grows and changes with
the relationship and with the family or whatever. But in
those moments where you're put into a situation that no
one expected, whether it's a death of a loved one,
(27:52):
of financial strain that comes out of nowhere, or something
like that. Is does the game plan allow for those changes,
you know, pivoting in a moment's notice like that.
Speaker 7 (28:02):
Of course, that's why we talk about mindsets. This is
a football term, right, mindset. You got to have the
mindset to know that the season is long. I remember
our first season here twenty seventeen. We were zho to four.
That's not good to start the season. And coach Linn,
he comes into the locker room right after we lose
that fourth game and he says, we're this is a
(28:23):
long season. We're only oher and four in the first quarter.
We've got three more quarters to go. And couples need
to realize is that if you're going through a difficult
season right now, it might not last or it shouldn't last,
right And so what we teach couples is is have
that mindset. And I love Our favorite movie is Gladiator,
and what Gladiator says to the to the warriors that
(28:46):
are in the arena with him, he says, I don't
know what's going to come out of those gates, but
whatever comes out of those gates, we have a better
chance to make it if we stay together. He said,
you got that, Let's stay together. And we'd like to
say in marriage, you're better together if you know that
there's gonna be some tough seasons ahead. There's gonna be
somebody coming out through that tunnel that's going to try
(29:06):
to pularize you. But you have a better chance of
winning if you stay together.
Speaker 8 (29:11):
Yeah, and mindset is having that big picture in mind.
And then in the game plan, we give you questions
to ask to keep checking up on each other because
our needs do change in different seasons, and each of
us are evolving, and so therefore to make sure that
we evolve together because we're changing. And this is why
(29:32):
so sad when couples that have been married thirty forty
years end up getting divorced. It's not evolving together if
you're if you're not evolving together, you're growing apart and
you're becoming more.
Speaker 9 (29:44):
And more strangers.
Speaker 8 (29:45):
That happens when we go through tough times like a
loss of a loved one or you know, fertility challenges
or any challenges that you face. If you're not having
an interdependence and connecting and learning each other in each sea,
you can grow apart, and so that is a part
of the game plan of how to grow together in
each season of life. We can't predict what those seasons are,
(30:09):
but we can have a strategy of how we want
to navigate those unexpected challenges that life brings.
Speaker 4 (30:15):
Yeah, I'm thinking about the NFL situation.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
I'm just thinking, like, those are those are two very
different seasons. You know, if you got married early in
your career and you're gone, I mean there is no
off season truly, and you're gone, whether it's working out
five hours a day or whatever in the off season,
or as you're traveling with the team, or you're staying
with the team or whatever, and you're still that's a
completely different marriage than when you're suddenly in the same
(30:41):
house together twenty four to seven and you've got to
keep I would imagine you've got to keep some things
for yourself. Both the husband and the wife still have
some alone time, some individual time. But wow, that's very stark.
That's a very different marriage. Those are two separate marriages.
So yeah, I can see where that would be very challenging.
Speaker 9 (31:03):
I mean, I.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
Mean from the woman's perspective, it's like, oh, you're in
my house.
Speaker 4 (31:09):
Now, what what am I going to do it?
Speaker 7 (31:14):
That's a real deal, right, So we not only do
it pro athletes, but we also do it with special ops.
Speaker 3 (31:21):
Yeah, or military.
Speaker 7 (31:23):
One military wife says, I've had fourteen different honeymoons, same husband,
but fourteen different honeymoons. And I asked, what do you
mean by that? She says, every time he comes back
from a duty, deployment, a deployment, whatever what happened over there,
which he cannot tell her, it comes still comes home
with him, and so he has to come back to
(31:45):
her home, her environment, the way she's been disciplining the kids,
or the way that she's ran it, and enter into
her world. But that can be somewhat difficult, especially if
you're a type and you're a commander.
Speaker 9 (31:55):
Right right, Yeah, I definitely.
Speaker 8 (31:57):
This is why I say, Shannon, you really get it,
because that's something that the women do talk about, is
I have my system going on, I have my routine,
and now I have to work you into the routine
just for a short amount of time because you're gonna
be leaving again and it kind.
Speaker 9 (32:14):
Of disrupts the flow.
Speaker 8 (32:16):
So that is a challenge that couples need to get
a strategy and get on the same page about how
do we want to keep.
Speaker 9 (32:25):
Evolving or changing our home.
Speaker 8 (32:27):
But communication is the big part that keeps us on
the same team moving in the same direction.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
If there's one tip you could give average normal people
like us the best thing you can do for your marriage,
what would it be?
Speaker 4 (32:39):
I know I'm putting you on the spot. Here is
it date night? Is it checking in with each other?
What is that?
Speaker 5 (32:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (32:45):
I would say this is mine because I have practiced this, right.
I've asked Tandra in every season of our marriage, how
am I doing? How am I doing? What could I
do better as a husband? How could I be there
for more for you more? How could I be a
better list? How could I understand your heart more? I mean,
this is a complicated being right here, right, and so
the season that.
Speaker 9 (33:06):
I knew her complicated complex.
Speaker 7 (33:09):
I guess it all depends on what day you asked
me then, But I just want to know. I don't
want to take advantage or sorry take her for granted,
to say what I knew about you and your last
season is you're still the same, right, And so learn
to ask questions that sometimes might you might have to
do some work and you might have to, you know,
stay up a little later organizing some things in your mind.
(33:31):
But man, ask the tough questions, how could I be
a better husband or wife?
Speaker 8 (33:34):
Tandra about you, I would say making sure you make
your spouse and your marriage a priority is going to
be key because I think in the world we live
in today, there's so many demands on a couple to
be pulled in so many different directions, and it takes
intentionality to make each other a priority. Just as important
(33:55):
as any other appointment on your schedule is your appointment
to connect with your spouse and then you know your
kids and your family. In the book, we talk about
winning the home game. That's one way that you win
the home game. I think we focused so much on
winning the away game in our careers, in our hobbies,
our sports, and everything that we got pulling on us,
(34:16):
and we focus on winning in those areas, but sometimes
the family and the marriage gets put on the back burner.
So that would be my tip is just win the
home game and keep your family at the forefront because
at the end of the day, that's where your legacy
will last. All the other things we were sharing with
(34:37):
another group that's about that ceo in New York City
a few years ago where of an insurance company, and
the guy killed that CEO, and by the end of
the day they had replaced that ceo. Like his family
is still grieving, like I don't even know if all
his family members knew that he had been killed. But
the fact that you are replaceable in all these other areas,
(35:00):
the area that you're not replaceable in is in your
in your family, in your kids' life, in your spouse's life.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
So yeah, so true, so true.
Speaker 3 (35:10):
George and tondre Gregory.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
The Marriage Game Plan is the name of the book,
developing a winning strategy for marital success, available wherever you
get your books.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
Thanks for all having in a couple of weeks.
Speaker 5 (35:23):
Here we come.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
John Covelt shows up next. We'll see you tomorrow. Stay dry, everybody, blessings.
Speaker 3 (35:30):
You've been listening to The Gary and Shannon Show.
Speaker 2 (35:32):
You can always hear us live on kf I AM
six forty nine am to one pm every Monday through Friday,
and anytime on demand on the iHeartRadio app.
This is Gary and Shannon and you're listening to KFI
A M. Six forty, the Gary and Shannon Show on
demand on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
A lot of us already know that drinking water is
essential to staying healthy, essential than is. A new research
suggests how much water you drink each day could affect
how your body reacts to stress. Interesting the lab experiment,
young adults who typically drank less than a leader and
a half of water every day had a much bigger
spike in the stress hormone cortisol.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
How you drink four leaders leader and a half is
fifty one ounces. You got thirty fours, right, so that's
like about one and a half one and a half
smart waters.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Yeah, so if you drink less than a leader and
a half, you're more likely to see a spike in
cortisol compared to those who drank four leaders.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
Okay, so three of those basically I drink.
Speaker 4 (00:59):
I try to drink three day, So about.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Fifty five percent stronger stress response just from the differences
in the fluid that you take in every single day.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
Where are you finding this item?
Speaker 3 (01:09):
You don't need to do everything?
Speaker 4 (01:10):
Well, I need to send it.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
I've got a couple of friends who do not drink
water at all, drives me in saying.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
You know, we also went through our first probably I
would argue forty to forty five years of our lives
not drinking water.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Never drank water. We drank it out of the hose
or the water fountain. Yeah, never saw a bottle. I
remember what I.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Saw much lead intake as I did h two oz intake.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Yeah, yeah, exactly, and you turned out stop it basically perfectly.
Speaker 4 (01:39):
What else is going on?
Speaker 3 (01:43):
Time for what's happening?
Speaker 1 (01:47):
Well, you know what's happening, and the engagement heard around
the world. Not only did I have every news source
give me an alert to every sports news source light
up my phone.
Speaker 3 (01:59):
I want to pull out. I was the one who
pointed it out. You were I was.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
He calmly points up at Good Day La and says, huh,
they got engaged.
Speaker 4 (02:09):
They got engaged, and I said what?
Speaker 1 (02:14):
And then Michael Monks wanted to know if we were
going to break into the commercial.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Trake and asked at least four people Blane had gone
down Summer and downtown. Hold on, no, we're not going
to break it, Lord, Taylor Swift, Travis Kelsey, engaged after
about two years of dating.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
We don't know exactly when it took place.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
A lot of my alerts said finally in like two
years and nothing really right.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
I mean, I guess it's kind of part of the course.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
But her Ralph Lauren black and white striped dress she
wore in the pictures sold out four hundred dollars dress.
The ballpark estimate, according to one jeweler in New York City,
puts that ring in about five hundred and fifty thousand dollars.
Speaker 5 (02:57):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
If you remember how in love he was right at
the beginning in November of twenty three, said I've never
dated anyone with that kind of aura about them. I've
never dealt with it. But at the same time, I'm
not running away from it.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
That was two years ago.
Speaker 4 (03:12):
They both have a way with words, they really do.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
They talk about each other in what used to be
Hallmark card language. Cards are garbage now, but they used
to do a good job. And those two are really
effusive and they.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
Are maybe it is real, and maybe they will.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
They say about each other are beautiful. All right.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
We've talked about this all summer because the heat failed
to materialize, and we are going to have a warmer fall.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
We knew it was going to happen, and it's going
to happen.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration forecasts whether parts of the
country are going to be above, below, or near average
for parts of the meteorological fall, which for them is
September through November, and they said that places like Arizona,
New Mexico may be above sort of, the Arizona California
(04:05):
border would be slightly above, and then most of California
will also be just a couple of degrees above normal
average for the fall ps.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
We may have thunderstorms and flash flooding in the mountains
and deserts. Yesterday, the thunderclouds over the San Gabriel Mountains,
they were massive, they were insane. So anyway, yeah, in
rain downtown LA on Friday or on Saturday a little
bit as well, apparently, so.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
The mountains can expect thunderstorms and about a sixty percent
chance for flash floods.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
California's best high schools, let's see, let's get into it.
Number one comes to us from Cerritos, not just known
for its auto mall, is it no? Whitney High School?
Number one in California and number sixteen around the country.
That's pretty amazing. In Cyprus, Oxford Academy number two.
Speaker 4 (05:05):
I had no idea. I've never heard of these places.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
The Science Academy Stem Magnet School in North Hollywood is
number three. Again, these are the California's best high schools.
Number four, Doctor Richard Vladovich, Harbor Teacher Prep Academy in Wilmington, California,
Academy of Math and Science, and Carson almost all well,
at least the top five six. They're all Southern California.
(05:28):
Riverside Stem Academy and Riverside is number six. University High
School in the Fresneck is number seven.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Doctor T.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
J Owens Gilroy Early College Academy in Gilroy number eight,
Pacific Collegiate Charter in Santa Cruz nine, and lynn Brook
High School up in San Jose is number ten.
Speaker 4 (05:46):
All right, McDonald's, is that in a new sauce?
Speaker 3 (05:51):
What is it?
Speaker 4 (05:53):
It's I'm glad you asked.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
It is called the Special Edition Gold Sauce, the tangy
blend of North Carolina style vinegar barbecue with notes of honey, smoke,
and mustard. Give me a spoonful that sounds delicious. It'll
be available on the side or featured on four chicken items,
among them the special Edition Gold Snack Wrap, which includes
(06:17):
mc crispy strips, shredded lettuce, cheese, new sauce. We've also
got two new sandwiches at McDonald's, the Bacon Special Edition
Gold mccrispy Me Too, I would eat that right.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
And the Deluxe counterpart, both of them served on potato
toasted potato rolls. Apple would smoke bacon toasted potato Deluxe
version adds the lettuce and the tomato.
Speaker 4 (06:37):
Holy hell, all right.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
The future of retirement planning wealth management is here La
Trajan Wealth Call Today at three one oh two nine
nine ninety nine sixty Trajan Wealth, of course, brings us
your trending stories every single day. Up next the decisions
when it comes to the governor's race, the upheaval. Perhaps
that Alex Padilla could, if he threw his hat in
the woo, we'd have a real barn Burner.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Barn Berner. That's what we're here for.
Speaker 6 (07:07):
You're listening to Gary and Shannon on demand from KFI
AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
Best selling authors coming in who have written a book
on the marriage game plan. I mean, does it get
more universe connected to us than this providential? I mean
a literal NFL chaplain and his wife are coming in
to talk marriage with us on a day that a
star in the NFL is engaged to be married to
(07:37):
the biggest pop star in the world.
Speaker 4 (07:40):
We are connected, Elmer.
Speaker 5 (07:41):
That's what the show is.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
Synchronous, we do.
Speaker 5 (07:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:44):
Would that count as a third strike the third hit
or no? It's just a combination. Yeah, first.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Okay, so the race for governor is still very very
far away, but it is closer than you think. Maybe
is that the right way to put in sure? About
four and ten registered voters responded to a poll saying
they have absolutely no flip and clue who they're going
to vote for next November when it comes to the
governor of the state of California.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
I forget that. It is just next November.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Yeah, I mean, yes, next November is how you say it?
This November is this November would be this new se
November and next November has got it. Yes, you're right.
So among those who did have a preference, those four
and ten said they had no idea. Among those who
do have a preference, we talked about this last week,
Katie Porter is the one who comes in as the
(08:38):
top choice. She gets about seventeen percent of people who
say they have made a choice. Arguably it's because she's
got the name recognition. Remember she did run for Senate
and lost, but she's got name recognition. She was also
a member of Congress and lost, and now she's got
the name recognition. On the other side of that, Chad
(08:59):
Beyond the Republican the only other candidate who got double
digit support, with a backing of about ten percent of respondents.
That would be relatively good news for him. The only
other Republican of name that has any sort of name
recognition is Steve Hilton.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
He comes in farther down.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
But the Democrats have so many people right now saying
that they want to run for governor that that's going
to end up splitting up that vote. So as of
right now, the top candidates. The other top candidates out
after Katie Porter and Chad Bianco former Health and Human
Services Secretary, Javier Bisera former mayor, and Tonio Viragosa, former
(09:41):
state legislative leader. Tony Adkins, the current Superintendent Public Instruction,
Tony Thurman, then former Controller Betty Yee, businessman Stephen Klubec,
conservative commentator, sorry, commentator Steve Hilton.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
I can only imagine that they are saving money for
the know the next year, and that's why we've heard
nothing about any of them. Really, I mean, they don't
want to blow it too quick, I guess. But you
want to plan your your horse race correctly. You don't
want to jump out of the gate and then fade
into the back when you run out of money.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
And but but if getting that getting that bump now
may make everybody else fade away quicker, I don't know.
I mean, like, for example, we talked about when Kamala
Harris announced that she was not going to run for governor,
that was a huge fundraising boon for Katie Porter. Again
because she's in the in the lead, probably has the
(10:36):
most name recognition, et cetera. But if she's able to
cobble together something quickly now and get her name out there,
I mean she's I've seen her interviewed on a handful
of cable TV shows cable networks, so she's available and
out there.
Speaker 5 (10:51):
But is it.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
Have you watched those of you listened to them?
Speaker 2 (10:54):
I no, okay, for I mean for multiple reasons, one
of which is I don't care what they have to
say yet.
Speaker 3 (11:01):
I mean I don't.
Speaker 4 (11:03):
I just want to see what her message is appealing to.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
I'd like to see what she has to say at
this stage being the front runner, and how she handles that.
Speaker 4 (11:15):
Because I had had enough of her.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
She would come on this show.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
I know of that, and I don't want to roll
out there.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
I don't want for any of these people at this
point to your point of it's too early.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
I mean, if it gets to a point, I would.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
Have like a number of them on and maybe a
couple like a Democrat and a Republican to kind of debate.
But I'm not a big fan of being a show
that just has politicians on to get in the chair
and go blah blah blah blah blah blah blah wah
wah wah wah wah, and just tell people what they
want them to hear, the talking points and all that.
(11:51):
I don't like being a platform for that. If they
can do, if they can come on here and debate
the issue with someone who is opposed to them, and
they can have a thoughtful conversation about it and move
away from whatever the talking points are. I'm happy to
do that, but just like offering up people room to
blather is But.
Speaker 5 (12:08):
That's what.
Speaker 3 (12:10):
Of course lately has been that.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Yeah, I mean it has been the say a few keywords,
throwing the you know, the name of the boogeyman that
you think is the worst person in the other party
or whatever, and then that's it.
Speaker 3 (12:24):
No actual arguments about what's going.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
On, right, I mean, if they want to come in
here and we could talk about you know, pizza or
you know, things that are not politics, that would be
kind of be fun. Okay, just invite the politicians in
and then bar them from bringing up anything political to
talk about you know, you know, movies and pizza and pizza.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
I'm starting to sense a theme here.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Well, pizza is not controversial.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
It depends where you are. You're in Chicago or in
New York, and you bring up pizza like the other
city it's controversial.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Well, I wouldn't do that, you know, I think that
everyone supports a type of pizza. I don't know why
you're making a controversial I don't know why you're injecting
controversy into pizza. And this is why I can't bring
in politicians with you up.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
Next True Love Tuesday. Everything's a fight the authors of
the Marriage Game Plan, developing a winning strategy for marital success.
You're your anniversary is tomorrow? Is it why you want
to bring.
Speaker 4 (13:31):
The Keana schedule this?
Speaker 1 (13:33):
I said that George and Tondra are experts and we
should have them in for a True Love Tuesday, and
she happened to book it on the day that Taylor
Swift and Travis Kelcey got engaged.
Speaker 5 (13:44):
Brilliant.
Speaker 3 (13:44):
That's how it works. Gary and Shannon will get I mean, sometimes.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
She's Keanna when she's yelling, and then she's Keana, and
then she's Kiky. She's got three different personnelity. She's like
Charles Haley. Yeah, I'm sure there's sweet, exactly sweet Keana,
and then there's Keana who doesn't mess around, and then
there's Kiki.
Speaker 4 (14:04):
And we'll learn about that coming up later in the week.
Speaker 6 (14:08):
You're listening to Gary and Shannon on demand from KFI
AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
We do love love and once in a while we
throw in a True Love Tuesday and it just happens,
so the stars aligned. Travis and Taylor must have heard
us talking about our guests today and decided let's just
publicize the engagement.
Speaker 7 (14:27):
Right.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
George and Tondra Gregory, they are chaplains in the NFL.
They've worked with the Giants, They've worked with the Jets.
They've said a lot of prayers, y'all. They do work
with the La Chargers now and they are best selling authors.
They have written the Marriage game Plan, developing a winning
strategy for marital success. This is on the top of
the chart USA today. And how cool is it that
(14:52):
you'll spend some time. You've been on Good Morning America,
You've been on all of the shows, and you've spent
some time for us, and we really appreciate it.
Speaker 5 (15:00):
Thank you guys for having us.
Speaker 8 (15:02):
I love I love that True Love Tuesday. It's a
nice ring.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
Tell us about your your love story. I mean you
you guys mentioned outside that we're thirty years married.
Speaker 5 (15:12):
Thirty years that's right, that's right.
Speaker 7 (15:13):
We met in college biology one o one, first day
of class and I was, you know, looking at anatomy.
Speaker 8 (15:22):
Yes, and it is true that we met in biology,
but we had a lot of the same classes that
particular year, and we just kept seeing each other in
the same classes.
Speaker 7 (15:33):
Tundra went and changed their schedule to reflect my classes.
Speaker 5 (15:37):
And she was happy.
Speaker 8 (15:38):
He says that I went and signed up for all
of his classes once I saw him in biology. But
that but that part he's he's made that up. That's
his truth, but it's not the truth.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Is that part of the marriage game plan? That that
verbia is right there of that's your trip.
Speaker 5 (15:58):
Perspective?
Speaker 4 (15:59):
Is that part of it?
Speaker 6 (16:00):
Yes?
Speaker 8 (16:01):
Is you can't assume the truths. You got to get
on the same page and create our truth. That's what
it's got to be. So how did this start?
Speaker 1 (16:09):
How did it start that you started working for teams
as chaplains?
Speaker 5 (16:13):
Yeah, well, really.
Speaker 7 (16:14):
When we moved to New York City, we planted a
church in New York City, and we were trying to
figure out how does as a church plan do we
get out of the four walls? And so we started
doing pre marriage counseling for couples who were just living
together and didn't know how to do marriage, but they
were trying to act like they were married. And we
created an organization called Journey for Life. That's our marriage organization.
(16:37):
And the New York Jets was the first company to
call us, and they said, we need help with our marriages,
and so that's how we kind of got our start
with just an entry way, and then we just through
relationships and networking. We met coach Anthony Lynn and he
came to that church that we planted, and who knew
that a few years later he was going to move
(16:58):
out here. We were moving out of New York. Somebody
reintroduced us as a possibility and he looks at resumes
and he says, hey, this is my pastor and his wife.
There are no interviews. If he wants the role, he's
got the role. So I didn't even move out to
LA before before I talked to him. I moved out
in faith because they connected us then, and that's how
(17:20):
we got here.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
It's interesting that you said the Jets contacted you. The
organization knew that they needed help with a very personal thing,
which is the marriages of the people in the group
in the organization.
Speaker 5 (17:32):
That's right.
Speaker 7 (17:33):
It was their team chaplain, right, and so so you
see us as a chaplain pair duo. Sandra's a licensed therapist.
So when you get us, you get like a total package.
But not all chaplains in the NFL come equip to
do what we do, and that's not disparaging anyone. It
just really highlights what the la Chargers have right. And
(17:53):
so when they called, we were ready to go because
we've been doing this for so long and Tandra, through
our thirty years of marriage, she's told me how many
times I get it wrong, that I know how to
help couples.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
And you listen to that and you hear her say that,
of course, yeah, of course. So the game plan, the
marriage game plan, this is the book developing a winning
strategy for marital success. Is it one game plan for everybody?
Or does each couple come up kind of with their
own game plan?
Speaker 4 (18:22):
How does it work?
Speaker 8 (18:23):
Yes, each couple comes up with their own game plan
because every marriage is unique.
Speaker 9 (18:28):
It's made up of two unique individuals.
Speaker 8 (18:31):
And everybody has to have a different game plan because
you got different personalities, you have different dynamics, different experiences.
So each couple needs to work together to develop their
unique game plan. And that's what our book does. It
helps couples lay out their unique game plan.
Speaker 5 (18:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (18:50):
Yeah, So there's marriage books that tell you sort of
this objective truth and you say, well, man, that means
is this for everyone?
Speaker 5 (18:58):
Our book is not like that.
Speaker 7 (18:59):
What we do is we give you a lot of
things like filling the blank exercises. Right after every chapter,
there's a putting it in a practice practice section and
in that section there's questions you answer and couple's activities, right,
so you're doing the work together.
Speaker 5 (19:15):
It's very interactive.
Speaker 7 (19:16):
And then we also have a QR code that you
can scan that you'll get a five minute coaching from
the coaches Tandra and I get. They'll take you to
a video of us coaching. So what this is is
is not just a marriage book that you read, but
it's a marriage book that you experience and you develop
your very own game plan by how you answer the questions.
(19:37):
And then you get the chapter ten and we walk
you how to how to put it all together.
Speaker 4 (19:41):
So it's like I could choose your own adventure book.
Speaker 9 (19:44):
Yeah, that's right, that's right.
Speaker 7 (19:46):
If you're if you're a man or woman enough to
go down the adventure of putting uh to to explore,
then we will help you develop your very own unique
marriage game.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
Oh that's cool, and I would assume that, I mean
you obviously it would be great if people started their
marriages with something like this, at least this discussion, but
it would pertain to people I don't know me twenty
seven years into marriage.
Speaker 7 (20:10):
Sure, Well, we didn't start off with a game plan
at all. In fact, that's why we wrote the marriage
game Plan, because thirty years ago, when we first started off,
our first two years was hell, can I get an amen?
Speaker 9 (20:22):
Amen?
Speaker 5 (20:23):
Okay?
Speaker 9 (20:24):
I was there too, yeah.
Speaker 7 (20:26):
Yeah, but sometimes when I tell that, they don't hear
your part. It's like that I'm just saying, oh no, no, no.
It was because we didn't have a game plan, right.
We come from different backgrounds, you know, we didn't know
how to communicate well with each other. I mean, Tandra
just thought I looked like Denzel, so she thought checked
the box.
Speaker 5 (20:42):
I'm good.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
I was just those eyes and.
Speaker 7 (20:47):
Like I said, biology one on one, I was attracted
to the anatomy already. But people need more than just
an attraction to really have a successful game plan. So
we know this personally. So years later, in hindsight, we thought,
if we'd have had a game plan, we would have
probably enter into marriage more prepared. And so that's what
we that's why we wrote this book is because we
(21:09):
will not only married couples, but pre marriage so also
get a marriage game plan.
Speaker 5 (21:13):
Because it definitely helps.
Speaker 9 (21:16):
And you never too.
Speaker 8 (21:19):
Far out or in such a place where it's just
never too late to get a marriage game plan. It
doesn't matter where you are on your journey, in the beginning, middle,
tough times, good times, it's just never a bad time
to work on a marriage game plan. Marriage is hard
work and it's a journey, and it's ever evolving and
ever growing. And even with the chapter ten developing your
(21:43):
game plan, we wrote it so that you can come
back to it and adjust it as life happens and
you need to make adjustments to your game plan. So
it's not like a one and done document. It's an
ever evolving document.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
I want to talk to you guys about I think
a lot of couples feel like if they're going to
get a book like this, or they're going to go
through these exercises, and that means they're admitting that their
marriage is in trouble.
Speaker 5 (22:05):
Oh no.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
And I want to talk about how that's kind of
taboo and how I mean, if you really care and
you're it's it doesn't have to be work, you know,
in the sense of the word, but that that's just
not true. It just kind of shows that you care
to kind of check in with each other.
Speaker 5 (22:18):
Well, we're talking. We know this. Go ahead, sorry, we
know this. Ye is that pros still practice? Right?
Speaker 7 (22:25):
And if pros at an elite level still think they
have to practice, then what do we do as average couples?
Speaker 5 (22:30):
We need to practice as well? This is an exercise
about practice.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
I think Alan Iverson is the only one who didn't
like practice, is the only one we're talking with George
and Tondre Gregory. The Marriage game Plan is the name
of the book. Will continue with our True Love Tuesday
when we come back.
Speaker 6 (22:46):
You're listening to Gary and Shannon on demand from KFI
AM six forty.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Ooh, what's their wedding song going to be? Guys, Taylor
and Travis.
Speaker 3 (22:57):
Don't it's a John Mayer song.
Speaker 4 (22:59):
I think it's didn't she date him?
Speaker 5 (23:01):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (23:02):
Okay, then that's that's that's that's a limits.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
That's not funny. You're not respecting the love. We're talking
with George and Tondrack Gregory. They are the best selling
authors of The Marriage game Plan. You can find it
anywhere you find really anything. You know how to you
know how to buy this stuff and have it by
your at your door by the afternoon Amazon wherever you know.
(23:25):
I googled it, came up with it. It can be
at my uh my door this afternoon.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
Ask your question because I thought of another one while you.
Speaker 4 (23:31):
Were just my question.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
So you bring up then you've worked in the NFL
as chaplains in both coasts, and you brought up Anthony Lynn.
Anthony Lynn's wife, if I'm not mistaken, worked in New
York while he was in LA. That's a challenging situation
in the NFL. Marriages are tough. Guys are gone a lot.
I would imagine your phones ring all the time from
(23:55):
wives and from the husband's of how do I keep
her happy? How do I keep him home? Like all
things sure, it's a very busy thing. How often is
your phone ringing?
Speaker 5 (24:04):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (24:04):
Well, I mean it rings constantly, right, because we like,
just like an NFL coach, right, we're marriage coaches, So
we're always coaching, We're always encouraging, we're always you know,
I don't want to say babysitting, but we're always We're
always there, right, and sometimes that's hard, but it's really
rewarding in a sense that because we've been married thirty years,
(24:26):
it helps us to give back it helps us to remember, Hey,
remember we were in that particular place, and really it
helps us to celebrate where we've come from.
Speaker 5 (24:34):
But man, you.
Speaker 9 (24:36):
Yeah, I would just add, yes, that it's a busy schedule.
It's very demanding.
Speaker 8 (24:41):
It's a unique set of circumstances, and even couples who
don't have this highest.
Speaker 9 (24:47):
Level of pressure, marriage can be difficult.
Speaker 8 (24:50):
So I do think it's important for us to come
along with the couples to help them lay the foundation
while they're in the league, because the divorce rate outside
of the league is around after retirement is around seventy percent, wow,
And so they cannot wait to work on their relationship.
It's something that has to be implemented as they're on
(25:12):
this journey so that they have the foundation to continue
to build their family and marriage after they are no longer.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
Why is that so high?
Speaker 8 (25:21):
I just I think it's the pressures of the lifestyle,
of having a nomadic lifestyle, you know, in football. In
the NFL, football is king, it's the priority. I find
that a lot of times wives don't want to mess
up their husband's game, right, and so you don't want
(25:42):
to bring up any issues.
Speaker 9 (25:43):
So I find that so they.
Speaker 4 (25:44):
Sit on it and then then time and everything comes up.
Speaker 9 (25:47):
Yeah, so you just never really get to go ahead.
Speaker 7 (25:49):
And then I've heard from a lot of former players
that man that so now I'm home, I'm less busy,
and we don't know each other because we weren't proactive.
Speaker 5 (25:59):
And so here's that's what we know. No one gets
married to lose.
Speaker 7 (26:03):
We all want to win in our relationship, right, and
so we tell our pros. Unless you want to be
a part of the statistic, then you have to be
proactive instead of reactive. Being proactive is now, get a coach,
learn to do it, get our book right, go through
marriage retreats or getaways. But handle what you need to
handle now and that's what's in front of you and
(26:25):
not plan for what is to come later.
Speaker 5 (26:27):
Right.
Speaker 8 (26:28):
Yeah, And I think that's why our role as chaplains
and marriage coaches is so important because I do think
even with the high profile lifestyle, you don't know who
you can trust.
Speaker 9 (26:39):
And marriage is.
Speaker 8 (26:40):
A private thing. Whether you on a high platform or not.
People don't want you in their business. They don't know
if they can trust you, and so just making sure
they have those trusted people that they can come to
us and talk about the unique challenges they may be
facing in their relationship, and we create that safe space
to help them work through it. Because no one can
(27:00):
really walk through marriage and figure it out all by themselves.
Speaker 9 (27:03):
We all need help.
Speaker 7 (27:04):
Well, we say to people, don't die in the sea
of lifeguards. There's so much help out here for couples.
But yet sometimes people drown in that ocean because they
don't want to call out or they don't want to
wave their hand. And yet we say, if you're married
and you're struggling to day, reach out, don't die in
a sea of life.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Well, like Shannon said, I mean, I think for a
lot of people, they assume that that it's going to
be looked at as they it's an acknowledgment that their
marriage is failing or it's not great or whatever, and they.
Speaker 3 (27:30):
Don't want to do that.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
Sure, well, I was going to ask the title of
the book game Plan makes it sound like it's an
overarching thing. You know, you started early, you continually kind
of update this plan and it grows and changes with
the relationship and with the family or whatever. But in
those moments where you're put into a situation that no
one expected, whether it's a death of a loved one,
(27:52):
of financial strain that comes out of nowhere, or something
like that. Is does the game plan allow for those changes,
you know, pivoting in a moment's notice like that.
Speaker 7 (28:02):
Of course, that's why we talk about mindsets. This is
a football term, right, mindset. You got to have the
mindset to know that the season is long. I remember
our first season here twenty seventeen. We were zho to four.
That's not good to start the season. And coach Linn,
he comes into the locker room right after we lose
that fourth game and he says, we're this is a
(28:23):
long season. We're only oher and four in the first quarter.
We've got three more quarters to go. And couples need
to realize is that if you're going through a difficult
season right now, it might not last or it shouldn't last,
right And so what we teach couples is is have
that mindset. And I love Our favorite movie is Gladiator,
and what Gladiator says to the to the warriors that
(28:46):
are in the arena with him, he says, I don't
know what's going to come out of those gates, but
whatever comes out of those gates, we have a better
chance to make it if we stay together. He said,
you got that, Let's stay together. And we'd like to
say in marriage, you're better together if you know that
there's gonna be some tough seasons ahead. There's gonna be
somebody coming out through that tunnel that's going to try
(29:06):
to pularize you. But you have a better chance of
winning if you stay together.
Speaker 8 (29:11):
Yeah, and mindset is having that big picture in mind.
And then in the game plan, we give you questions
to ask to keep checking up on each other because
our needs do change in different seasons, and each of
us are evolving, and so therefore to make sure that
we evolve together because we're changing. And this is why
(29:32):
so sad when couples that have been married thirty forty
years end up getting divorced. It's not evolving together if
you're if you're not evolving together, you're growing apart and
you're becoming more.
Speaker 9 (29:44):
And more strangers.
Speaker 8 (29:45):
That happens when we go through tough times like a
loss of a loved one or you know, fertility challenges
or any challenges that you face. If you're not having
an interdependence and connecting and learning each other in each sea,
you can grow apart, and so that is a part
of the game plan of how to grow together in
each season of life. We can't predict what those seasons are,
(30:09):
but we can have a strategy of how we want
to navigate those unexpected challenges that life brings.
Speaker 4 (30:15):
Yeah, I'm thinking about the NFL situation.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
I'm just thinking, like, those are those are two very
different seasons. You know, if you got married early in
your career and you're gone, I mean there is no
off season truly, and you're gone, whether it's working out
five hours a day or whatever in the off season,
or as you're traveling with the team, or you're staying
with the team or whatever, and you're still that's a
completely different marriage than when you're suddenly in the same
(30:41):
house together twenty four to seven and you've got to
keep I would imagine you've got to keep some things
for yourself. Both the husband and the wife still have
some alone time, some individual time. But wow, that's very stark.
That's a very different marriage. Those are two separate marriages.
So yeah, I can see where that would be very challenging.
Speaker 9 (31:03):
I mean, I.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
Mean from the woman's perspective, it's like, oh, you're in
my house.
Speaker 4 (31:09):
Now, what what am I going to do it?
Speaker 7 (31:14):
That's a real deal, right, So we not only do
it pro athletes, but we also do it with special ops.
Speaker 3 (31:21):
Yeah, or military.
Speaker 7 (31:23):
One military wife says, I've had fourteen different honeymoons, same husband,
but fourteen different honeymoons. And I asked, what do you
mean by that? She says, every time he comes back
from a duty, deployment, a deployment, whatever what happened over there,
which he cannot tell her, it comes still comes home
with him, and so he has to come back to
(31:45):
her home, her environment, the way she's been disciplining the kids,
or the way that she's ran it, and enter into
her world. But that can be somewhat difficult, especially if
you're a type and you're a commander.
Speaker 9 (31:55):
Right right, Yeah, I definitely.
Speaker 8 (31:57):
This is why I say, Shannon, you really get it,
because that's something that the women do talk about, is
I have my system going on, I have my routine,
and now I have to work you into the routine
just for a short amount of time because you're gonna
be leaving again and it kind.
Speaker 9 (32:14):
Of disrupts the flow.
Speaker 8 (32:16):
So that is a challenge that couples need to get
a strategy and get on the same page about how
do we want to keep.
Speaker 9 (32:25):
Evolving or changing our home.
Speaker 8 (32:27):
But communication is the big part that keeps us on
the same team moving in the same direction.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
If there's one tip you could give average normal people
like us the best thing you can do for your marriage,
what would it be?
Speaker 4 (32:39):
I know I'm putting you on the spot. Here is
it date night? Is it checking in with each other?
What is that?
Speaker 5 (32:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (32:45):
I would say this is mine because I have practiced this, right.
I've asked Tandra in every season of our marriage, how
am I doing? How am I doing? What could I
do better as a husband? How could I be there
for more for you more? How could I be a
better list? How could I understand your heart more? I mean,
this is a complicated being right here, right, and so
the season that.
Speaker 9 (33:06):
I knew her complicated complex.
Speaker 7 (33:09):
I guess it all depends on what day you asked
me then, But I just want to know. I don't
want to take advantage or sorry take her for granted,
to say what I knew about you and your last
season is you're still the same, right, And so learn
to ask questions that sometimes might you might have to
do some work and you might have to, you know,
stay up a little later organizing some things in your mind.
(33:31):
But man, ask the tough questions, how could I be
a better husband or wife?
Speaker 8 (33:34):
Tandra about you, I would say making sure you make
your spouse and your marriage a priority is going to
be key because I think in the world we live
in today, there's so many demands on a couple to
be pulled in so many different directions, and it takes
intentionality to make each other a priority. Just as important
(33:55):
as any other appointment on your schedule is your appointment
to connect with your spouse and then you know your
kids and your family. In the book, we talk about
winning the home game. That's one way that you win
the home game. I think we focused so much on
winning the away game in our careers, in our hobbies,
our sports, and everything that we got pulling on us,
(34:16):
and we focus on winning in those areas, but sometimes
the family and the marriage gets put on the back burner.
So that would be my tip is just win the
home game and keep your family at the forefront because
at the end of the day, that's where your legacy
will last. All the other things we were sharing with
(34:37):
another group that's about that ceo in New York City
a few years ago where of an insurance company, and
the guy killed that CEO, and by the end of
the day they had replaced that ceo. Like his family
is still grieving, like I don't even know if all
his family members knew that he had been killed. But
the fact that you are replaceable in all these other areas,
(35:00):
the area that you're not replaceable in is in your
in your family, in your kids' life, in your spouse's life.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
So yeah, so true, so true.
Speaker 3 (35:10):
George and tondre Gregory.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
The Marriage Game Plan is the name of the book,
developing a winning strategy for marital success, available wherever you
get your books.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
Thanks for all having in a couple of weeks.
Speaker 5 (35:23):
Here we come.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
John Covelt shows up next. We'll see you tomorrow. Stay dry, everybody, blessings.
Speaker 3 (35:30):
You've been listening to The Gary and Shannon Show.
Speaker 2 (35:32):
You can always hear us live on kf I AM
six forty nine am to one pm every Monday through Friday,
and anytime on demand on the iHeartRadio app.
Gary and Shannon News
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce
Football’s funniest family duo — Jason Kelce of the Philadelphia Eagles and Travis Kelce of the Kansas City Chiefs — team up to provide next-level access to life in the league as it unfolds. The two brothers and Super Bowl champions drop weekly insights about the weekly slate of games and share their INSIDE perspectives on trending NFL news and sports headlines. They also endlessly rag on each other as brothers do, chat the latest in pop culture and welcome some very popular and well-known friends to chat with them. Check out new episodes every Wednesday. Follow New Heights on the Wondery App, YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to new episodes early and ad-free, and get exclusive content on Wondery+. Join Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts or Spotify. And join our new membership for a unique fan experience by going to the New Heights YouTube channel now!
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.