Understanding the Power of Parts: Erin Gilmour on Internal Family Systems

In this episode of Sisters in Sobriety, hosts Sonia and Kathleen chat with Erin Gilmour, the founder of Rose Psychotherapy. Erin is a Registered Psychotherapist (RP) and Certified Canadian Addiction Counsellor (CCAC), known for her warm, down-to-earth approach to therapy. Specializing in helping individuals with addictions and eating disorders, Erin brings a wealth of knowledge and personal experience to the table. Her own recovery journey informs her empathetic and understanding approach, and she is also a strong advocate for marginalized communities, addressing systemic issues in her practice.

Today, Sonia and Kathleen will be diving into the fascinating Internal Family Systems (IFS) model with Erin. Erin will explain the IFS model in simple terms. Imagine that inside each of us, there are different "parts" or aspects of our personality that influence how we think, feel, and behave. For example, there might be a part of you that gets really critical when you make a mistake, and another part that just wants to comfort you with a treat. IFS helps us recognize these parts and understand their roles. Here are a few key parts:

1. Managers: These parts try to keep us in control and avoid pain. They might be the inner critic that pushes us to do better or the planner that keeps us organized.
2. Firefighters: These parts jump in to distract us from pain. They might urge us to eat, drink, or binge-watch TV when we're feeling stressed.
3. Exiles: These are the hurt parts of us that hold pain and trauma. They often get pushed aside or "exiled" because the other parts want to protect us from feeling that pain.

By understanding these parts and learning to work with them, we can start to heal and make healthier choices. Erin will also talk about why being kind to ourselves is so important and how mindfulness can help us stay grounded

This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our Substack for extra tips, tricks, and resources.

Highlights:

[00:01:10] - Introduction to Erin Gilmour: Erin's background in providing compassionate, evidence-based therapy for mental health issues, including addiction, using the IFS model.

[00:02:10] - Erin’s Journey: Erin shares her personal story and what led her to become a psychotherapist.

[00:03:50] - Founding Rose Psychotherapy: Erin discusses the motivation and challenges behind starting her own practice.

[00:06:34] - Explanation of IFS: Erin gives an overview of the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model.

[00:07:35] - Parts of the Self: Introduction to the concept of different “parts” within us, such as managers, firefighters, and exiles.

[00:10:00] - Managers and Firefighters: Erin explains the roles of managers and firefighters in our internal system.

[00:13:00] - Exiles: Discussion on exiles, the parts of us that hold pain and trauma.

[00:14:30] - No Bad Parts: Emphasizing that there are no bad parts, only parts trying to help in their own ways.

[00:16:20] - Practical Examples: Erin gives practical examples of how these parts might manifest in daily life.

[00:18:50] - Introducing IFS to Clients: How Erin introduces the concept of IFS to her clients in a relatable way.

[00:21:40] - Working with Protectors: The process of working with managers and firefighters before addressing exiles.

[00:25:00] - Addiction and IFS: How the IFS model specifically addresses addiction and helps in recovery.

[00:27:30] - Healing Exiles: The gentle process of working with and healing exiled parts.

[00:31:00] - Self-Compassion: The importance of self-compassion in the healing process.

[00:34:00] - Integrating Mindfulness: How mindfulness