In this episode, Sonia and Kathleen are joined by sisters Patti and Karin Clark for a conversation about breaking the cycle of intergenerational addiction and reclaiming personal identity. Patti is an award-winning author whose books blend emotional sobriety and self-reflection, and Karin is a counselor and educator with decades of experience in trauma and addiction recovery. Together, the sisters reflect on how their upbringing shaped them—and how recovery allowed them to rewrite their own stories.
We talk about the roles we unconsciously play in dysfunctional families—hero, rebel, mascot—and how these survival strategies can carry into adulthood, often laying the groundwork for addiction, codependency, and emotional suppression. And we tackle some big questions: How do family dynamics influence substance use? Can breaking generational trauma actually stop the cycle? What happens to sisterhood when sobriety enters the room?
Patti and Karin share personal stories of relapse and reconciliation, how their relationship as sisters evolved through recovery, and the beautiful ways their sobriety has rippled through their families. You'll hear about the grief and rage they had to walk through in order to reach forgiveness—not just for others, but for themselves. Their shared journey highlights what happens when we name the truth, do the work, and choose connection over silence.
This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our Substack for extra tips, tricks, and resources.
Episode Highlights (Timestamps)
[00:02:00] Patti shares a tribute to Karin’s steady presence after their mother’s death
[00:03:45] Karin explains family roles and the origin of the “hero” label
[00:05:00] Patti opens up about being the mascot and diffusing family tension with humor
[00:07:45] A painful memory of being compared at the dinner table
[00:08:30] Food as a first addiction and internalized shame
[00:10:15] Karin outlines the family role model (hero, scapegoat, lost child, mascot)
[00:11:00] Both sisters share how their roles shifted over time
[00:13:30] Roundtable discussion: Which family role is most prone to addiction?
[00:15:00] The hidden addiction behaviors that often go overlooked
[00:17:30] Patti and Karin reflect on their first experiences with substances
[00:20:00] Karin recalls when drinking shifted from fun to fear
[00:22:00] Patti describes the subtle but powerful interventions that helped her quit
[00:26:00] Tracing addiction and denial through both sides of the family tree
[00:29:00] The myth of the “poor Patty and Karen” narrative within the family
[00:30:15] How their sisterhood changed through recovery and ACOA work
[00:33:30] Relapsing, boundaries, codependency, and coming back together
[00:36:30] Karin and Patti explain the emotional dynamics of their old arguments
[00:39:00] The cultural addiction of capitalism and constant productivity
[00:41:30] When relapse happens: fear, enabling, and permission
[00:44:00] “Safe drinking” lies we tell ourselves in the gray area
[00:46:00] Did we break the cycle? Parenting, legacy, and sober modeling
[00:49:00] Creating a new lineage of openness, healing, and choice
[00:51:30] What does forgiveness really look like in recovery?
[00:53:00] Patti explains the danger of skipping grief and going straight to forgiveness
[00:54:30] Karin shares how compassion helped her process resentment
[00:56:00] Forgiveness doesn’t always mean reconciliation
[00:57:30] Closing reflections on sisterhood, healing, and sharing the tools
Connect with Patti Clark
Website: www.patticlark.org
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