January 29, 2025 • 59 mins
Oh boy do we love Brittainy Taylor! What a fun ass episode! If you don’t know her, please go check her immediately! She was such a champ to be a guest on the pod at 37 weeks pregnant. We talked about being silly teens, pregnancy, how hot Kristin Cavaliri is, and renting family members! lol. It’s a really goofy episode! Enjoy!
See ya later,
BYE💋
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@brittainytaylor
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
I turn.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Get a little such up. Hi am Teren, I'm Mari,
and you're listening to Toup. We hope you're picking up
what we're putting down.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
So before I was pregnant, remember I.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Was already I think pregnant. But I remember you.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
Two hundred and twenty pounds at nine months pregnant.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
And now are you sorry if you didn't want to
share one thirty.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Twenty pounds, if it's like baby, because you're not thinking
about like the water, the uterus, that baby itself.
Speaker 4 (00:32):
Twenty.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
My dad's too twenty.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
I mean, I'm enjoying pregnant.
Speaker 4 (00:37):
That is a big girl. Yeah. But my body didn't
want anything healthy at all.
Speaker 3 (00:41):
Like I did not crave salads.
Speaker 4 (00:43):
I craved sandwiches, turkey wars, head yep sandwiches.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
My first I went to Chick fil a every day
and got a ice cream cone. Yeah. I was everybody
say right this one, this maybe one spicy and salty.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
Yeah. Oh see.
Speaker 5 (00:56):
I wanted my first trimester every day, like every meal.
I wanted something decadent. I ordered everything Postmates my first
I know, I was like, I don't care, I don't
want to make anything.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
I don't want a leftover. I don't want anything like that.
Speaker 5 (01:12):
And then my blood pressure was a little high, so
I've completely.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
They're like, okay, body, we're not going.
Speaker 5 (01:20):
To So now I've completely flipped it around and I've
been eating really really clean and i feel so much better.
And my blood pressure is very low now and it's fine,
not very low, but it's like normal now.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
So I'm like, Okay, you're feeling so much better. This
is really exciting. But what's also really exciting is that
we have an awesome guest.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I tried to be a little bit. I tried to
be like that so cool, but then I was like,
it's cold and I'm tired, and I'm weeks away.
Speaker 5 (01:46):
Yeah, pregnant, a bad bitch, a mother of one. You
also have a podcast.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
I do have a podcast. I have a little bit
more serious that. So I was like, oh, I fine, serious,
we just got we just got done doing it. I
literally learned from there to.
Speaker 5 (02:05):
Hear seriously silly, there's nothing serious about which is.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
So nice because he likes you know it is fine.
That's what I learned about birth. I mean birth, that
you have a better birth if you can laugh through it,
because you can't have two sphincters like tightened up, so
when you laugh, it opens spin. Everything's about which you know,
I mean literally there's no like welcome, welcome to absolutely
no care with all in birth and like like just
(02:30):
be naked and do whatever. But they say, like, you
know how like when you're when you're stressed, everything tightens up. Yeah,
so if you laugh, spry spincter. Yeah, it loosens your
sphincters and it helps the birthing process. So if you
can get someone to make you laugh the whole time,
like you'll have great birth.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Well, friends of comedians.
Speaker 5 (02:47):
Like right a bit right just for birth, Yeah, just
for my birthbit, just sphincter, the.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Birth bit and and the baby spin.
Speaker 4 (02:56):
Yeah are you sure.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Your sphincter it's such a funny word.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
It's such one of my favorite works.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Yeah, it's like, yeah, we did a birth class and
they were like, yeah, so you know when you're tightened up,
all your sphincters are tight, and they're like, try to
cry and try.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
To why are there are multiple sphincters? Am I Yeah?
Speaker 3 (03:13):
I thought there was only one.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
Spin you have that you have that sphincter and then
you have muel is. Yeah. But like if you think
about like holding, there's like different places in which like.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Okay, so sphincter is technically just like a whole.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Tighten muscle like something that's like, yeah.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
You're a professional as far as babies. Now, no, you're
like you know a lot.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
I know nothing.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
I have a child, and I don't know ship.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
I learned a lot more second baby, because I was
like first baby, I got pregnant. I was like, oh,
I'm pregnant mom, I'm gonna go look at all these
products and be like whatever. And then I looked back
into my Instagram, I'm like, you're fucking annoying. Second time around,
I'm like, let me just ask questions and chill out.
And it's been so much nicer this time to be like, okay, cool,
I know absolutely nothing and I'm learning everything.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
See that's how I was. People have so many questions
for me. They're like, all right, do you remember blah
blah blah when you were pregnant?
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Like no, oh yeah, I don't know. They're like, she goes,
who is your doctor?
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Why have you gone to a doctor yet.
Speaker 4 (04:11):
As a doctor black woman? I don't remember her name?
What was your plan? I was like, I had no
blacked out, blacked out literally didn't.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
I made a whole plan and I was like, I don't.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
Care, get it out. I think that my baby I
don't have. I'm going to Vanderbilt, which is.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
A great it's a great one.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Yeah yeah, but it's.
Speaker 5 (04:35):
A collective hospital, so you see a guy now until
your baby is born.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
And I didn't realize that. So I went to Centennial
and I remember asking I would be. I was like, okay,
so I'll see you.
Speaker 6 (04:44):
She's like, no, whoever's on call? Yeah, well she's like
she's like, I don't know. It's like a different person
that does my sonogram every time. And I go, yeah, bro, yes,
they're never going to get the same person. That's not
how it works.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
No, it's like that you're everybody's got it's just a
it's just a shift. Yeah, it's shift.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
You're never going to get the same person, which is.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Which is so then you get that's I think that's
why as a mom you get really like okay whatever.
Like I like first time around, like I was kind
of like, oh, you know, like I don't know, I
don't want to toot or do anything. Now I'm like,
let it all out. I'm naked whatever, because you just
see so many people, you get like humbled by it.
You're like, everybody's seen me naked at this point in
my most uncomfortable, like today I have to go. I
(05:26):
have to go do my strap bee swab, so like
I'm like, someone's going to swap my asshole today?
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Wait, what what do the.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Strap group strap or shrap be to make sure you
don't have that like bacteria.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
I don't remember that. Did I did that?
Speaker 1 (05:40):
You did it? I remember you did it at the
very end.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
I got my butthole swab. I don't even remember.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
It wasn't any soft swab then it must have been
in sin.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
Yeah. I got fisted when I was dilating.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
They're like they're like in there like this, like you know,
just swooping.
Speaker 4 (05:56):
Away is the worst because they induced me at the
seven weeks because Charlie wouldn't go and she was getting bigger.
She's almost nine pounds of thirty seven weeks, big, big girl,
big bebe big. I was ten four and then her
baby daddy six forty.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Oh so you had you had a tall bab yeah.
Speaker 4 (06:13):
Yeah, yeah. So every time they came in to fist
me to see how far. Yes, that's correct, that's what
they do.
Speaker 1 (06:19):
It goes all in. I mean you're you literally have
a whole size of a donut.
Speaker 4 (06:22):
Yeah. I said, I need an epidural because this is
the worst pain I've ever experienced in my life.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
And then they came before they came to do it again.
They came. She came with her fists towards me, and.
Speaker 4 (06:32):
I said, no, listen, fist fuck fristy fran fisty fran
frisky brisky fifty fist up.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
You wait, you give me drugs?
Speaker 1 (06:46):
Girl? What the The funniest part about it is that
like they do it so, I mean they're there, they're
ellendin or she must have had four or five other births.
Like to her, it's nothing like she does hundreds of
birds a day. And you're just like She's like, okay,
I gotta get in there. Yeah, and you're like, wait
a minute, give me dinner first. Yeah, could you say.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Hello, I know your name?
Speaker 4 (07:08):
Is it really real?
Speaker 1 (07:11):
God? Yeah, it doesn't very badly.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Let me know for like, would you like an epidural?
Speaker 4 (07:21):
You can have that in your I was going to
eventually have an epidural. I didn't know how bad the
fisting was going to hurt.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Yeah, Well, and there's a timing because you can't get
it too early and you can't get it too late. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (07:31):
And I don't think the technical term is like we're
like we're going to fist you, right, Yeah, it's a
it's a service channel.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
They're checking you. Yeah. Wow. Meanwhile, everything's like pulsating. The
baby's trying to push out, You're expanding, so like it
doesn't feel Why did they even you had.
Speaker 4 (07:51):
Well I had a section anyway, Yeah, because she wasn't
going she was chilling, she wasn't going anywhere.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
She's going to be three.
Speaker 4 (07:57):
Oh I love that age is my face bridge? Three
year old?
Speaker 1 (08:03):
We decided, yeah, a couple of my girlfriends have done
like the weight, and she convinced me because she was like,
there are very few surprises in life, and if this
is because we don't know, if this is last baby's
probably the last baby. Yeah, so I'm like, we'll just
do it. Yeah. We're also gonna do a home birth
so that we'll see how that goes really different this time.
First river is hospital because I was like, I'm not
gonna take any the chance. And then I was like,
(08:26):
as long as baby's healthy and we can do it,
we'll try to rall dog it and yeah it goes.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
Yeah, so you have an.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
I'm just gonna say the same thing, Mari.
Speaker 5 (08:36):
No, no, no, I was going to say the exact
same thing.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Please stop. No no, no, no. Wow.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
You guys know it's the first time I've ever said
that too.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
It's literally gonna be like, wait, do you have a doulata?
I literally was gonna say that, and you stole it.
You went in my brain.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
She's like implanted inside of me forever, every fiber of.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
My being for sharing DNA.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
At this point, I know any who do you?
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Yeah? I did a duel and a midwife this time.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Okay, okay, so I have the medical of a.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
Due and a midwife medical training. So a duela technically
is somebody that's there from mom. I came my Yeah,
my family is so far away. I didn't have any
support and so I was scared to death. So this
person is like making sure Mom's taken care of. Like
is everybody listening to mom? Is dad where he needs
to be or you know, parent where they need to be?
Like is the doctor listening advocating? Because there's a lot
(09:33):
of especially in you know, certain minority groups, a lot
of women are not are either talked down, you're completely dismissed,
and soul the duel's rule really came in because in
the throes of labor, you're not advocating for yourself. You're
just like, I don't get the fucking you know. And
so that person's like, wait a minute, she said she
didn't want that, Like that's the person that I needed
(09:55):
to talk for me in case, you know, Dad kind
of clammed up a little bit, which, so I wanted that.
And plus, postpartum dula is great because they come in
and they just give you that big hug that you
kind of need at the end, like like psychologically of
like are you okay, do you need Hey, I'm going
to hold the baby ball, you go take a shower, yeah,
kind of stuff.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
And so it was worth that's not a night nurse.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
It can be a night nurse, but a doula is
much more like.
Speaker 4 (10:21):
And there's those like them, beautiful energies too.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
I gave you gave me this woman named who's.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
Just such a duela because they're such a specific person. Yes,
you were born to do that, Yes, But she also
said that having a woman in the room with you
is does something energetically or something.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
Because it's almost like it brings back like a cultural
experience of like supporting mom, Like you're specifically supporting mom.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
She's like even just having a woman, a female in
the room, even if she's just sitting in a corner.
I don't know the science behind it. I kind of
it's like what she told me, but you should ask
her because it was really interesting.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
And it's basically renting a grandma because they had grandma's spirit.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
That's okay, yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Yeah, but yeah, it's basically like you know, you have
you have a grandma, you have you have a badass
grandma in the room. Yeah, that's really what it is.
Speaker 4 (11:13):
Forty right, but has that like you know, it's the
same kind of energy.
Speaker 3 (11:18):
It's a very beautiful, calm, peaceful.
Speaker 7 (11:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (11:20):
Yeah, and they're soledgeable.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
Some people love having like their Like I did not
have the relationship with my mom where I was like
I would want my mom to see me in that capacity.
So this was like renting a mom because like I
don't have that, Like I got to be strong for
my mom or I'm like I'm worried that my mom
would be worried, so it's like having that extra woman
of like just motherly.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
That's interesting.
Speaker 4 (11:42):
That's a really good like business idea.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
Because rent a mom. Yeah, can you guys, it's so cute,
but I'm here for the graduation.
Speaker 4 (11:53):
Yeah, my mom's a piece of ship. I don't don't dog. Ever,
I'd like to rented one.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
So I rented it.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
Yeah, she came to my graduation. Yeah, my wedding.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
My insurance page. Insurance paid for my second mom. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
Yeah, is this mom covered by insurance? That's funny.
Speaker 1 (12:10):
Yeah. And then midwife. Midwife is like kind of the alternative.
I hate to say it like that, but it's like
an OB and that they deliver. They deliver, but they
also have more medical background.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
So you have your doctor and your midwife. Yep.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
Some people, Yeah, some people do that. So I did.
I chose not to do the doctor out and I
went the midwif free route, which is more like it's
more like culturally woman focused than OB. I loved my OB,
but I was I think this round I wanted something
more holistic.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
M h, that's cool.
Speaker 5 (12:42):
God, there's like there's just so many choices. Yeah, so
many choices there's so many things.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
Yep, and you have a backup plan right in case,
like if anything.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
Yeah, that's all the whole board. So if this is happening,
we go here. If this is happening, we go here,
and yeah, so right now, or just literally have fairy
lights all around my room and just getting it ready
for putting in what we have, the pool, we have
the bed.
Speaker 3 (13:02):
What's the temperature.
Speaker 1 (13:03):
It's it's hot enough to kill bacteria.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
Smart, That's what I was trying to They keep it.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
They basically like it's literally like old school, like they
boil water or they and like they just keep heating
the temperature hot.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
So like even if it takes you twenty four hours.
Speaker 4 (13:17):
Yep, Wow there's a kid oiling the water.
Speaker 1 (13:20):
Yeah, and they'll keep they'll kick you out. So really
like a lot of people labor, but they don't birth.
So they'll labor and then birth in the in the
in the bed or something like that. Oh yeah, but
the idea of being in water and your hospital have
a too, Like if you can move around and you
put yourself in water, your body relaxes and so it
helps the laboring process.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
See that's what I'm like, because.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Cold they say anything saving thing when even if you
don't use water, like bring ship that will make you calm,
whether it smells or lights, like the way that my
yeah right, it didn't make me. They say, it's all
about right. They're like, because you think about like the
hospital lights are like literally the way that my duel
(14:01):
is said, she goes trying to birth, No, I.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
Have one, maybe not. We're going to send you a
list of from five to ten mothers that you can
rent for this.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
She makes and she bakes, see, and you can you
can bring them in here and just do like an
interview process.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Yeah that's a funny skit.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
That's a funny skits going, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
That's funny. Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
But yeah, they say. Basically the duel it was like,
don't try not to give birth in any in any
environment that you wouldn't have sex in, because it's basically
the same thing an intimate settings. So if you think
about hospital lights, you're like, oh, so he brings some lighting.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
In Okay, I was like, I like that fucking a hospital. Yeah,
here we.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
Are, but just like making it more cozy, like bring
your own bringing the.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Chances we could rent out Disney.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Yeah, like in the castle. Can I get birth in
the castle? I would like, I would like the West Wind.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
What about there's a place called the Poke Nose in Pennsylvania. Yeah, yeah,
you remember the champagne glass hot tubs. Oh sick, real sex.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
I imagine. And you're like, yeah, nice.
Speaker 4 (15:15):
Why Charlie was just sectioned out with like Gnarley Hospital.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yeah, but sometimes you have to go through that route
because it's the safest route.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Right, Well, there was no option there.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
That baby wasn't coming down the other way.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
We have to see where.
Speaker 5 (15:29):
Yeah, well okay, I guess like if you sang like
the lifts that you know, like read.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
I did, I say, uhl night you did as they
were as they were cutting. Yeah, it's just like it
was Christmas time.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
I love that night.
Speaker 4 (15:48):
And I remember your nurses going, she's singing, she sure.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
Keep going, let her have it. Worry about your own song, Yeah,
you worry about the organs and make sure everything goes
back fucked up. Think about it, because I think you afterwards,
they gave you seven layers to get through all of that,
right to get the baby out of your us.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
And you're like, but they watched it, have to take
your your and.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
You feel out nothing, you feel not nothing, but then
you have to move them around.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
Did you ever watch it?
Speaker 1 (16:18):
I watched.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
I watched it your own.
Speaker 4 (16:20):
No, I watched they give you a video surgery procedure,
like maybe a year after. I was like, I'm ready
to see what they did.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Happened?
Speaker 4 (16:30):
Holy ship? Yeah, you know what they do, right.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
They move things around to take the baby out.
Speaker 4 (16:37):
They don't just move it around. They take organs out
and put them on a table.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
I read that they don't always have to do that.
Speaker 4 (16:43):
Well that's what I saw, I believe. So I think
Tim said that he saw a couple of organs on it.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
How did he have sex with you after that?
Speaker 1 (16:51):
That's crazy?
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Took a long time.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
Apparently people offer see questions because of sex because I
don't see that part. But like sex after a vaginal
birth is just is like I mean, if somebody sees
a bowling ball coming out of your vagina, that's a
little scary too.
Speaker 4 (17:07):
You know, well that's gonna be hard because that's your vagina.
So you're like you tear for me, it's painful because
we're just like the healing is gnarly, but I'm fine
after nothing there, Like, yeah, for you guys.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
I want nothing to touch me for ten weeks. Yeah right,
well thank you.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
Yeah, who wants to have sex a man? A man
would want to have sex, right, but like I mean yeah,
I mean.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Baby, and you try to get it, like you touch
me and I'm going to kick your balls so hard.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Yeah yeah, no way, no, I'm get by.
Speaker 5 (17:45):
I read it ready for you the same site that
you can do, so you can shut the fuck up.
Speaker 4 (17:54):
Men are We're amazing. We are we are wild wild.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
You have those little apps where you're like looking at
like each week and.
Speaker 4 (18:02):
Oh you need those.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
I know.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
It's weird.
Speaker 5 (18:05):
I went to get my hair done and my my
girlfriend was like, oh, do you know what you're having.
I'm like, oh, yeah, yeah, I'm having avoid And she's like, oh,
you're just like so chill about everything.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I'm like.
Speaker 5 (18:14):
Yeah, she's like just some people are just so like
like just.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Like no, I'm just chill.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
I I.
Speaker 4 (18:24):
Should I be different?
Speaker 3 (18:26):
No, you should be exactly like that.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
Okay, yeah, yeah, Like I posted one thing.
Speaker 5 (18:32):
Uh, there's a movie called Night Bitch with Amy Adams
and it's weird, but it's about a woman who is
an artist or was an artist, and she had a baby,
and her husband decided to be the bread winner, breadmaker,
bread winner so she can stay up so she could
say that baby the first year or two, and she
(18:54):
loses herself and like it's this and she hates all
the moms that she goes to, like these kids snakes,
and I'm like this is very relatable, I'm sure to
so many people. And when she kind of finds herself again,
she goes to this class where all these women she
was like judging them and she was like whatever, But
(19:14):
there's this crazy speech that she gives and she's like,
do you ever just realize that we are God? And
that like what we do we create is the crazy
shit and that like just this whole territ Yes. But
I posted it and I was like me three months
into it, like just like I'm.
Speaker 4 (19:33):
God, Like.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
I have a penis inside of me.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
You literally have a portal that brings like.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Have a little spine inside there.
Speaker 5 (19:43):
Anyways, and some of my friends are like, oh my god,
do I have to like unfollow you?
Speaker 2 (19:47):
Blah blah. I'm like, what what does that mean? Anything
about it?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
That's whatever, Like people get people get weird about Like
I mean, I.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Had a lot of pregnancy stuff. You, I'm like, yeah,
I was.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Just because I didn't know. I didn't know anything. I mean,
my whole life is student to have a podcast, my
mother and just it was it did. It definitely made
me different. It changes you, Yeah, it.
Speaker 4 (20:11):
Has if it does not.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
What what something?
Speaker 5 (20:14):
Are you okay? Like something is major as happening in
your life? Yeah, we all change.
Speaker 4 (20:20):
Well then it doesn't stop changing it like you have
somebody that relies on you all.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Yeah, for forever forever. My one of my my friends,
T K. Mckimney, who does all the yes, I love him.
When I first became he was like something about like
when you know, when we're in our twenties and thirties
and living life, He's like, no one realized like we have.
It's very selfish, like we could just get up and
go do whatever, and now you have this like little
person that's like wait a minute, you can't throw me
in kennel and when like you know, you can't, you
(20:46):
can't put it baby and kennel like you do a dog.
And so you're like your whole world is like when
do I have sitters? Or when you know, when does
life go this? Or how do I get back to
work or and so you do. Really you have to
lose yourself a little bit and change yourself a little bit.
Nothing's going to be the same because you have you
have a human being. Yeah, you're in charge of a
human being.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
Yeah that is wild.
Speaker 4 (21:06):
And it's like, okay to be like this is fucking
a lot, because yeah, really hard. Like after I had Charlie,
there were moments where I would come to her house
and I would tell Tim, I'm going out for a
pack of cigarettes and I'm never coming back.
Speaker 3 (21:19):
What did I just do because of that?
Speaker 4 (21:22):
Because also I had her at thirty seven, which is older.
I mean, you're gonna be four.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
You'll be thirty. I'll be thirty six one.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
So yeah, you spend your whole life being selfish and
doing whatever you want and just leaving your house and
putting a jacket on and going to a bar and
doing this and that, and all of a sudden.
Speaker 3 (21:38):
One day you can't.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
You can't.
Speaker 4 (21:40):
And it's not like an overnight thing for some people
where they go, Okay, that's fine, this is it. I'm
happy being here. It's a really hard thing to process.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
I was the first one in my friend group to
have babies in like this setting, not like at home,
but like in our we call him danks duel and come,
no kids, what do you call them dinks? So even
in my neighborhood, Yeah, in my neighborhood, we were all dangs.
So I was the first one in my neighborhood and
the first one in my friend group to get pregnant.
And so watching everybody be like going to the bars
(22:12):
or going on trips like that was hard. Yeah, that's exactly,
And not because I regretted it or like it's just
because like, well, one I could go, but that would
require so much effort too. It's it financially fucked, you know,
like even like to go on trips, you gotta I
have to pay for a second person, pay for themselves,
(22:34):
you know, like so everything's double the work. So you're
just like, fuck, man, I gotta I gott to rethink
my life here.
Speaker 3 (22:40):
Yeah, but everything.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
Changes, everything changes, and sometimes it's hard. It is, it's
allowed to be hard. I think it's a lot. And
I don't think you're I think people get upset because
they're like you're either you're either supposed to be this,
like oh my god, I love mom. That's the best
thing in the world, which I do love, or you're
like an absent mother and that's it. There's no in
between of like that mom being like shit, they're having
the fun should be.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
And that's how honest I am.
Speaker 4 (23:02):
Like I always say, I can't imagine my life without
my daughter.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
I love her.
Speaker 4 (23:06):
She's my person. She's eight years old, she's my best friend.
I love her so much.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Do I think about when I lived on an island
by myself and smoked weed with Rocky?
Speaker 4 (23:13):
Yes? I do, Yes, I do.
Speaker 1 (23:15):
Did you actually do that? Yeah? I lived in Saint
Thomas for like two years.
Speaker 4 (23:18):
Okay, we'll have it cool, Yeah, we will get But also, Brittany,
I'm newly separated, so now I have her, I have
half custody, so I do fifty fifty.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
So it's every divorce every awful.
Speaker 4 (23:29):
So divorce is an awful people, right, it took a
while to get here, almost a year, because that's really weird. Imagine.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Yeah, Well, I think for me, separation would be I'd
have to like my worry would be having to try
the other person because I'm such a type a person
about like who what my kid does? And I I
gotta let you do your thing.
Speaker 4 (23:48):
Luckily we're both yeah, yeah, and I'm both on the
same page. As far as parenting. I think that we
do it pretty well. We always have so, but now
having that like every other week to myself, I'm like, yeah,
I love my daughter so much. But then I'm like,
all right, said Sunday at.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Six o'clock, But you get to poop by yourself?
Speaker 3 (24:10):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm there.
Speaker 4 (24:12):
Why are they always there?
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Like it doesn't I'm like, does smell not offend you? Like, hey,
you always sit on my lap? I'm like, can you
can you let me go.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
There hanging out with my parents while they pooped? But
I don't remember.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Much hoping with parents.
Speaker 5 (24:25):
You did, Yeah, I probably did. I'm a coda, Bennette,
I probably did. But I will say that's what I
really like about your podcast is that you are honest
and you do bring up, like I just think, things
that more people relate to that don't talk about.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
Yeah, and I appreciate that.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
I'm always been I'm the Aquarius. I tell everybody all
the time, it's just querious. Season is upon us. But
I'm going with the flow, and I'm like, look, you're
not gonna We're not gonna always get it right and
I'm going to learn something tomorrow that I didn't know yesterday,
and that doesn't make me good, better and different, and
I just don't like. I don't like that I Saturday
around listening to like you have to do this and
this is your baby's gonna react because you know, we
talked about we were talking about sleeping today on our podcast,
(25:07):
and I was like, my baby slept through the night
so long as I was holding her. And for me
that was okay. For some people you want to sleep train,
that's great, yeah, but like there's just so there's so
many ways to do it.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
Yeah, and we all.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
Just got to chill out. As long as you love
your kid and you do your best, dude, do anything
else matters.
Speaker 4 (25:24):
It's with everything too. It's literally what works for you right.
There is no right or wrong now. It's as long
as you're not as you're not hurting your child, as
long as you're not you're protecting your child, you're.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
Loving your child, and let's be honest, you're no matter what,
you're doing a great job your child. Up. Yeah, you're like,
there's one thing you will do that will put your
kid in therapy and you're gonna have no control whether
you're like I gave him a banana that one day
and they wanted a fucking orange, and now they hate
me and they remember it for the rest of it.
Because my mom will be like, my mom lasted me.
She's like, you're pretty up something that happened when you
(25:57):
were sixteen. I'm like, because it affected you know, but
that's just that's it, because you're going to do something.
But they're going to be like, man, my mom was great,
but then she wouldn't let me sleep in my pj's
for four nights. I hate her, you know, Like it's
just the way.
Speaker 5 (26:11):
They're also human womens that we're trying their best, and
like all we can do is either break generational trauma
and do it differently, or some of us end up
exactly like our parents.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
I have no idea.
Speaker 4 (26:23):
Yeah, but you're never going to break it fully, Like
it's not I could do all the work on myself,
but I still find things that I repeat that my parents. Charlie,
I'm like, I don't know if that's ever going to go.
Like that kid, she's gonna take that with her.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
And it's almost live in the age of the Internet.
There's just so much out there that it's almost more overwhelming,
I think than if we were like eighties moms. You know, yeah,
because like people, oh you remember in the eighties when
they had to like put those messages out there like
do you know where your kids are? You know? And
I was like, I honestly, what would that feel about it?
Speaker 7 (27:00):
These were wild predators everywhere parents did didn't care. They
coached us, they were our coaches, they were our teachers,
they were our friends, dads, they were everywhere there was.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
How did we die? I had?
Speaker 1 (27:12):
My mom was I'm like, I'm like, I'm not gonna
do sleepovers anymore. My mom was like why, I'm like,
because when I did sleepovers, we went to the nearest
park and drank like malt liquor until one of us
had to go get.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
A sum Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:24):
We used to speak out. We used to sneak out
a debris fontanas in your got bad. Yeah, I remember, yeah,
getting cars at fifteen years old. Ye fast.
Speaker 1 (27:38):
At twelve, I ran away from home and I got
in a car of an eighteen almost you hitch from
Philly almost Oh yeah, went down somehow Instagram fucking without
a phone and nowhere. Somehow she found me here, threw
me back in the car, served it. I did almost Arizona.
(28:01):
I was on it. I was in a train in Washington. Okay,
I'm like that type.
Speaker 3 (28:07):
I'm like very shocked right now.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
I just told you I moved. I broke up and
moved to an island. What do you mean I like
jump out of airplanes? I well, I mean I was crazy,
I was wild. I had had daddy issues, so I
just used all of that.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
Is that what makes you jump out of airplanes? Daddy issues?
Speaker 3 (28:23):
You're like interest in St.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Thomas, Sat Thomas. So I graduated from college. I had
I had a company with a boyfriend called College Mansion.
We was like it was basically like a party uh website.
So we were found the hottest girls by school, by class,
and by state, and we would make these huge parties.
Speaker 5 (28:39):
Yeah, and the girls gone wild before, girls gone wild
after girls gone wild after.
Speaker 1 (28:43):
Girls but like it was like girls gone wild, but
like Hooters, girls like they weren't like team wild.
Speaker 4 (28:49):
Okay, tame wild, tame wild, like we would have liked
of age.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
Age appropriate and like we had like they were dressed up.
There was like fashion. Okay, got it hot college girls
with fashion.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Sense, got it? Signed?
Speaker 1 (29:03):
No, no movies sometimes, okay, not all the time.
Speaker 5 (29:07):
How do you You can't get in a girl way from showing.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
Her ti sphincter. You can't. If somebody wants to show
you their buttle, they're going to drunk.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
I mean yeah, okay, so you we had this company
and then we broke up.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
She's getting her tips tomorrow, are you.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Yeah? Oh that's exciting.
Speaker 5 (29:30):
You know that one porn star that has like really
big boobs, that's the book.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
Yeah, yeah, that's the mood.
Speaker 1 (29:35):
That's I mean, like, think about Bunny. Bunny is my
new like like yeah, like that.
Speaker 4 (29:40):
Hers so much that her body's banging and she's routine.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
Yeah, are great.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
Yeah, she's an icon, she's hot, an icon.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Yeah, seems she has like the calm like Dolly Parton energy,
but like hot.
Speaker 2 (29:59):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
I I imagine that's how people felt about Dolly at that
like yeah her at that error.
Speaker 2 (30:04):
Yeah you know, yeah, holy crap, I know it's so hot.
Speaker 5 (30:07):
I even love her story. I love the hooking or
the sex work.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
I love all of it.
Speaker 1 (30:11):
Yeah yeah, because that's what I mean.
Speaker 5 (30:13):
Is that not how she like took care of Jelly
and his child. It's sex work, oh yeah, and then
she just made tons of money because she's so hot,
and then I don't want to do anymore. Like I
love I love that, right, maybe I love sex.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Work, but she also doesn't hide that, and I think
that that's what's cool and important about that is like
because I was, I was Hooter. I was actually in
the Hooters Hall of Fame and I hid that for
a very long time because the guy that.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
I dated her photo of Brittany right, I send to you.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
But but I was. I traveled all around the world
with like the Hooters group. But when I got to Nashville,
because I thought Nashville was like very I don't know,
the guy I dated at the time was very conservative
Christiani or whatever, and like was like, oh, I can't
believe you did that. So I never told anybody, And now,
like I should have gone the buddy round and like
I did this. I had nude photos on the internet
from an ex boyfriend.
Speaker 4 (31:03):
And you're like, look at my body, Like look at it.
Look how lot I am.
Speaker 5 (31:07):
Yeah, but nobody knew that, like things were going to
be so acceptable.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
Right because back then, because back then if you had
things like that that came out of the closet, that
was like like disaster, right, and now we're like, now it's.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
A career booster. Yeah, they're like, oh she is an
only fans, Oh we love that.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
The most famous girl in the world is the one
that when she like have a thousand people in one day.
That was like the whole thing. A couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 4 (31:30):
I just saw that read it. I think it was
like a model two she banged. That's how many guys
she banged in one day.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
And it went like super viral, and you're like, good
for her, she's made in she's a millionaire.
Speaker 4 (31:42):
Now she's a millionaire. Yeah, thousands people one day.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
They just like laid there and just like she.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
Wasn't very happy about at the end, but it would
be she she did it for science.
Speaker 4 (31:50):
Listen for science, anything for science?
Speaker 2 (31:53):
For science? What what science? What science?
Speaker 8 (31:55):
Though, maybe you know if you wouldn't take it, like
if the if the human body, if the human body
was able to take it, So is it anything?
Speaker 2 (32:07):
Yes, she did.
Speaker 1 (32:07):
She definitely the light bulb went out for a second.
She definitely lost mental She probably had some mental things.
She had it word through you's not. Yeah, I wonder
if there's just a lozingly well physically, I'm surprised. But
she so she lined up, signed.
Speaker 5 (32:24):
Up, signed up, So obviously like they got and they
did fifteen minutes.
Speaker 1 (32:29):
Fifteen drum and they have a documentary fifteen minutes.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
That's too much time?
Speaker 4 (32:33):
How much?
Speaker 1 (32:34):
Maybe it was five, I don't know it was. There
was enough. They all had to. They were criterious. I
just don't know what they were.
Speaker 4 (32:39):
Wow, your phone do fifteen times one thousand?
Speaker 2 (32:43):
Can anyone do that in the fifty thousand?
Speaker 1 (32:46):
How many minutes are in a day? I looked this up?
But anyway, she did it. She did it.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
She directs, well, fifteen times a thousand, you just carry
the zeros.
Speaker 3 (32:55):
Oh you're rain manning right now.
Speaker 4 (32:56):
I thought you were mathematically dyslexico.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
Zero's all right, God, so that's how many hours?
Speaker 1 (33:06):
But I'm saying, like, now she's got, she's a millionaire.
She's probably gonna end up on all the red carpets
and you're like, okay, cool, And she.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Doesn't have to have sex ever again if she doesn't want.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
To know, she doesn't, she doesn't. But my point is is, like, man,
I was like a shame to be a Hooters girl,
and then you have like people out there that are like,
you know what what happens when you reclaim that power
and you're like, you know what, I did it, who
cares whatever? And like life opens up.
Speaker 3 (33:28):
Judging that at all.
Speaker 4 (33:29):
Now there's also levels of like integrity that you have
to stand behind that, like, you know, you have to
be able to really truly not give it what your family.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
But if you're going to do it, if you're going
to do it, you have to be.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
Like fall in full in yeah yeah, like uh yeah, you.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
Can't make excuses for it. I was saying, like I
did the Hooters girl thing, and then I made it.
I was like, oh, you know, I did it. It's
like any extra money my boyfriend cheated on me and like, no,
I want to be a Hooters girl. I thought it,
and I got to travel the world. Yeah, that's how
I ended up in Saint Thomas anyway. So I broke
up with that boyfriend, I sold my share, and then
Hooters was like, hey, we have a Saint Thomas. We
need like a house mom. Basically because they were bringing
(34:04):
people in from the States because they weren't able to
get enough people to work that were on the island.
So they bring like eighteen year old girls from Kentucky
who had never seen an island before, and they were
not lasting for twenty four hours because they were like
balls of the wall.
Speaker 4 (34:17):
Sure yeah, So they.
Speaker 1 (34:19):
Needed someone to be like kind of like house and
I So I did that, and then I was only
supposed to be there for a couple of months and
I ended up being there for like almost two years.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
Wow yeah, wow, did you love it?
Speaker 1 (34:27):
I did? And then I moved to Miami and I
had even a more time of my life.
Speaker 4 (34:31):
We still working for Hooters, huh.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
I ended up doing marketing for them and then and
then I got to like yeah, and then they were like, hey,
we need this little arm of the business where we're
doing more community work. And so I got to work
with like non profits and forefronbs basically just where do
you put the money, which landed me like on the
field in Miami Dolphins, and like I got to hang
out at the you know, all the games of the
Heat and that's when the Heat was having like the
(34:53):
three like season, and so I was going to like
everywhere and I was like not, I was just a
normal person, not famous, no Instagram, nothing, but like they
knew me because they were the partnerships we had. Yeah,
so I got all the crazy tickets and I still
got to be like a normy, which was the coolest
thing because I did a lot of stupid ship and
I'm not on the inn that.
Speaker 5 (35:15):
I was, like, I think the heavens above yeah that
in my twenties there was no Internet, was no there
was internet, but there was no Instagram.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
That's right, but there's yeah no Instagram.
Speaker 5 (35:25):
Yeah, I think the heavens above that or that we
just wanted to We weren't trying to share because like
we had MySpace and stuff, but I wasn't inclined to
share all those things.
Speaker 1 (35:32):
No, Like I wasn't like I was on Instagram, but
I wasn't like, oh I want everyone to see that
I'm hanging out with like you know, Lebron's back in
the in the in the whatever, Like I never like
did it. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (35:42):
My Space was more like for thoughts, like yes, you
know what I mean. Then the Facebook was like like
because I just told the thought on or like whatever
they were, which is why why your post on your wall?
Speaker 2 (35:54):
You see what tarn right on our wall.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
Yeah, or like your five favorite friends on MySpace.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
You know that was like Tom was one of the
I was always was always one.
Speaker 3 (36:02):
He was my first friend.
Speaker 4 (36:03):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
As like the sub tweets and the quote you're like,
I'm just feeling very nostalgic today and like some like
random quote that people were like, Oh, I wonder what
she means by that.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
It still comes up the memories on Facebook, Like it.
Speaker 4 (36:17):
Was like fourteen years ago you said something really dumb
and you.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
Were like super passive aggressive against your ex.
Speaker 4 (36:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:28):
Good, now they face.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
Now they call them memes. You know that's not as fun.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
Yeah. Now they're just quotes that you just posted other people.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
Do you know You're like, what passive aggressive quotes?
Speaker 4 (36:39):
All inspirational ones that really hit.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
Yeah, you know I'm talking you know.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
You are like, oh god, is she mad at me?
Yeah that's funny. That's so funn I used to do that.
Speaker 5 (36:52):
I'll do any of that ship now no, no, do grown Well.
Speaker 4 (36:58):
Now you're now you're pregnant, You're gonna we're talking, well,
I gonna follow you.
Speaker 2 (37:02):
I mean, oh my god, it's so annoying.
Speaker 4 (37:04):
I might have you do. Yeah, Like it's so your
your pregnancy post was fucking hilarious. You're very silly, start.
Speaker 5 (37:13):
Talking about how it is. That's great, she was, but
also I don't want to feel bad about it.
Speaker 2 (37:17):
So just follow me.
Speaker 1 (37:19):
Yeah, just be fun.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Yeah, just follow everybody hilarious.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
I will say, like, there was a there was that
one maybe I don't know if she didn't say that,
there was this one ex that, like I have, I
had like an affinity towards like in my life. We
had like a basically like a summer rendezvous and we
still think about it. And I saw him just before
I found again. Yeah, it was like one of those
like maybe like long lost loves, you know. So I
(37:44):
saw him just before I found I was pregnant river,
and we were supposed to hang out because I was
like on a break with my boyfriend at the time,
and and like we were supposed to have that one
night and we just never did. I didn't go home,
and then like two weeks later I found out was pregnant,
and so anyway, he unfollowed me, and that hurt my feelings.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Are you married no boyfriend?
Speaker 4 (38:03):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (38:04):
Well long term?
Speaker 1 (38:05):
Well yeah, yeah, we've been other since for five years though. Yeah,
well that marriage isn't in my cards.
Speaker 4 (38:10):
Yeah, listen, I didn't. I didn't do it up until
we were together for ten years. Yeah, I mean we
did it like the last year.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
And a half. I thought.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
I fought with it back and forth, and I just
there's like just universe. It just doesn't. It doesn't. It
doesn't go with my flow.
Speaker 4 (38:25):
I get it, I get it, I get it.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
I don't not that again, It's not like I think
there's a people out there that are like, hey, it's
a universally religious or cultural thing. I just don't. It
doesn't speak the same to me.
Speaker 2 (38:37):
Yeah, and that's fine. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (38:39):
I think a lot of people, because you know, now
that I'm pregnant with somebody i'm dating, they're like, oh,
you guys gonna get married. I'm like, I'm not rushing.
He doesn't even live with me yet, Like I'm not rushing.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Shit.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:49):
Yeah, well I'm already having a child with somebody that
I've only been dating for not even a year yet.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
Yeah. Well, I was, I was. I was only it
was only about two years and when we did it
weren't even we weren't together at the time I found out.
Oh Jesu, I went I went home. I was like
a manic best crying on the internet about.
Speaker 2 (39:07):
Supposed to my ex.
Speaker 1 (39:12):
The lappening. And then and then like we called you.
He called me and he was like, hey, how don't
we just go have dinner and like talk about stuff.
And then we went you know, we went to dinner,
we talked about stuff, and I'm like, Okay, maybe we
can make this work. And then a week later, I'm like,
I'm not having your.
Speaker 2 (39:28):
Baby knock knock, who's there? You're a dad, and I
guess we should stay together.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
But I mean it worked out. We we were like
we're besties now and it's great. But like it's just
it's funny because people will ask, like your husband like
he'll he'll say it like out of feeling. I think weird.
But I'm like, that's my baby, daddy, my partner. He
hates partner for some reason.
Speaker 3 (39:48):
Because it makes it sound like gay.
Speaker 2 (39:49):
But is that what you think you should start calling
your lesbian?
Speaker 4 (39:54):
People think partner like for some reason, it's just a lesbian, yeah,
gay term.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
I don't know, I think.
Speaker 2 (40:02):
I mean, I don't take it that way.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
I don't I don't take that way either.
Speaker 2 (40:05):
I think some people yeah.
Speaker 5 (40:07):
No, if some girls like my partner, you don't think
you're like, it's probably a girl.
Speaker 1 (40:13):
Yeah, but I mean who like I'll even say, like, honestly,
I kind of like.
Speaker 3 (40:18):
A date with my girlfriend.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
Yeah I say that.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
I say all the time, like I have a date
with my girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
I said all the time too. That's the air we're from.
It is my girlfriend. Yeah, my friend. That's a girl.
Speaker 2 (40:26):
I think what you want.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
Also, who cares?
Speaker 4 (40:28):
I don't care.
Speaker 1 (40:29):
Does that bother you? If I like the badge and
had one come out of my badge, that's not your problem.
Here's what I said.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Literally, I'm not trying to eat your vagina.
Speaker 1 (40:36):
Yeah. Absolutely, you're not my type. Okay, I asked.
Speaker 4 (40:45):
I want to know your whole story about like cavaliery.
Speaker 2 (40:50):
Very.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
That's like not part of my my wheelhouse anyway, I know.
But you such a weird part of my life the world.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
This show or uncommon show.
Speaker 1 (40:59):
Okay, I still work for I still work on Yes, Yeah,
that's how it started. Now, it kind of started together.
So it's funny people. So I worked at Bartago at
the time as a I came to Nashville, literally came
to Nationville. Nothing I had like a my mentor passed
away in in Miami. I had the sea prey love moment.
I was great because it was one of those moments
of like sugar get off the pot for me, of
(41:20):
like where I was going to go. I went to
Bali and did this whole thing for a couple of years.
Way more I want to. I like, I walked up,
I hung out with like locals, like I have like
pictures of me like just like randomly getting on motorcycles
with locals. Like I don't know what the fuck I
was singing.
Speaker 3 (41:41):
No, didn't do anything.
Speaker 1 (41:43):
I just did it full sober.
Speaker 2 (41:45):
Just did you meet.
Speaker 1 (41:48):
I just had a full sober like yoga retreat to
myself like nobody around. That's my next thing, say, I
want to let's do it on the podcast.
Speaker 4 (42:03):
There's a shaman in Kentucky. There's a whole Is it legal, Yes,
so you don't have to go to like Thailand or
we don't have to go anywhere.
Speaker 1 (42:12):
That's with mushrooms, Like my first mushrooms were in Saint Thomas.
I feel like though, like it should be. I just
want the vibe.
Speaker 3 (42:20):
Yeah, we're gonna have to see what it looks like
if a.
Speaker 1 (42:23):
Tiger is not going to eat me. Then I don't
know that I want to do that.
Speaker 4 (42:25):
I don't want I don't want a tiger anywhere around me.
Speaker 3 (42:29):
I'm on Gandhi, Gandhi.
Speaker 4 (42:33):
You know, I don't want to know.
Speaker 1 (42:35):
I don't want to be with the spirits of the forest.
Speaker 4 (42:37):
So do I in Kentucky an hour away from home?
Speaker 3 (42:40):
No tigers?
Speaker 1 (42:41):
Yeah, fair, fair, but anyway, yeah, so he when they,
when they, when I did all that, the I met
a I met a priest, a Hindu prieste. We walked
up these stairs at this temple, and it was like
he showed me. It was crazy. Then he started drawing
what looks like this swasaga. But he said, and this
is the original Hindu symbol. Its flipped, I think, but
(43:03):
he was, when you see it, you see a symbol
of evil. And I said yeah, And he said, but
it wasn't originally a symbol of evil. This was a
symbol of hope. It's the mother Church and the churches
that go around and explains he explains hinta to me.
And he said, so you see what once was meant
as medicine or as good could be poisoned to you,
meaning that the environment I was in was now poisoned,
and so it's time to move on, time to go,
time to where I move on? And I was like,
(43:25):
I was like heard. And then literally I got home
and my girlfriend's like, I'm going to Nashville. And she
was a makeup artist. She moved back in Kentucky, but
she's taking a second time.
Speaker 4 (43:32):
And I was like, that's where you guys were that.
Speaker 1 (43:35):
I'm originally from Philly, but through Hooters, I knew Kimberly
and so she was like, I'm going to come to Nashville.
I was like, perfect, I'll go. And I literally like October,
we visited, November, she found the place, and Christmas Day
I drove from from Miami to Nashville. Spent Christmas by myself,
ate Chinese food, watched When did the whole Did the
(43:56):
whole thing? Wrote a letter to myself about like how
it was going to go, and so I basically came
with nothing, and then I moved. I got a job
of bar Taco and I was working in right now.
Speaker 2 (44:06):
I had it.
Speaker 1 (44:06):
When my baby showers are great kind of like.
Speaker 3 (44:08):
My story a little bit.
Speaker 4 (44:09):
You came on with, yeah, like.
Speaker 1 (44:11):
How how life just kind of finds a way, and
so I was working in events and stuff and Mark
Block was good folks, Yeah, I was working. I was.
I was a Block girl for a while. And he
came to a lot with Kristen modeling. Yeah, he came
to lund with Christen introduced us and he was just
talking about certain things like, oh, like if you need
help with this butt, you knows this, Like he was
like really cool about it. And then a couple weeks
(44:32):
later he was like, Hey, she's actually doing a show,
but she does need people to work for her for real.
So you're going to do two things. You're going to
interview for the show with the casting people and then
you're going to go to a coffee shop and you're
gonna interview with Kristin, So bring your resume. So technically
both they were hired at the same time. But I
made that decision in my mind that like, I was
(44:54):
not very good on reality TV.
Speaker 2 (44:55):
I was.
Speaker 1 (44:55):
I know, I was boring because I just did I
was again like I was hiding myself. I didn't want
I didn't want to be I don't know. I just
I felt like I couldn't play at the role. So
which was fine because it ended up being now here
I am seven years later, still working for un Common
James and having that job and that stability, and that's
where I was going and so and now even if
I move on or whatever we choose to do from here,
(45:17):
like I have Kristen and that experience in my background,
but very cavalary, Like the show was such like a
mind fuck. I was just well, I was dating the
wrong person at the time. That was really hard, and
we had like a really bad breakup. We're cool now,
but that was like that was tough. And then also
like the person, like some of the girls that I
(45:39):
was on the show with, we ended up not getting
along again. That's all kind of fixed and yeah forwards, yeah, yeah,
but at the time, it was like I was so
scared to lose what felt like a new life blood
because I had nothing, and so I was like here,
they're like, here's money for the show, and here's your
salary for this, and so I was getting all of
these like I only having money and finally being able
(46:01):
to do so I was so scared to do it all. Yeah,
and it just it made me it maybe not a
nice person to a lot of.
Speaker 4 (46:09):
People something, Yeah, because I was cool to admit, yeah,
be aware of that.
Speaker 1 (46:13):
Because I think the people think like you go through shit,
like when things happened to you, it's bite, flight or freeze.
But I think there's also like masking, Like I masked
a lot of stuff, sure, because I was scared.
Speaker 3 (46:25):
And then you project a different part of you.
Speaker 1 (46:27):
That's right, yeah, right, And even I even look back,
I was I was one hundred and seventeen pounds. I
was like, I was like, I was like stressed, skinny,
like too skinny. I was like so focused on myself,
like and not that people who take selfies are bad,
I just I just remember, like I took a lot
of pictures of myself to prove to myself that I
was beautiful enough and good enough and smart enough and
(46:48):
fuck the world, you know. And now I'm like, yeah,
I am like who cares if I'm not for anybody else,
like enough for myself. But it took what seven years
to get there.
Speaker 2 (46:57):
Yeah that's okay, you got that?
Speaker 4 (46:59):
Yeah, yeah, on that that's the most important part.
Speaker 1 (47:01):
Ye.
Speaker 2 (47:01):
Yeah, I'm glad you still have a great relationship with Kristen.
Speaker 1 (47:03):
Yeah. Thanks, Yeah, she's funny as podcast.
Speaker 2 (47:07):
Yeah, she's got a great podcast.
Speaker 1 (47:08):
Have you guys done one day. I feel like you
guys would end up being really great together. Or even
Justin's Justin' come on here.
Speaker 5 (47:13):
Uh he had to wait, but he's coming for a
contract to Yeah he'll that's he'll be on soon.
Speaker 1 (47:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:20):
Yeah. And Justin Anderson, I feel like I feel like that.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
I feel like the energy troll. He is like the
most high energy, like like the vibration in the room
just changes. Like he is a and you'll.
Speaker 2 (47:35):
Love him and then you guys will start working out together. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (47:38):
Yeah, he's gonna be bro.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
He he pumps bro.
Speaker 1 (47:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:42):
But he's also like husband are so funny and.
Speaker 1 (47:46):
And they're also like they're also like the they're also
like the women Empowerment Gaze, Like they're like they're the
friends that you want in your court, like yeah, not
the cat love you know they love you and yeah
yeah they love you. They want the best for you,
to always think about you. Like just and I aren't
like close. He's close to Christian because we're all kind
of nice. Like he'll write me just like hey, you're
(48:07):
a great mom. Like like he'll like you know, like
like Malia had his start a baby and like he
was like, oh, you know, you guys have beautiful babies
or he's just so like he's just so good and
genuine important people like the world will lose an angel
when I like if and when that that man goes.
Speaker 4 (48:25):
We were just talking about people who listen words. Actions
speak louder than fucking words. That's a period, period, period, period,
like showing up for people that you love, that you
truly care about and saying those things are everything.
Speaker 1 (48:38):
Yeah, it's better than better than sending a gift or whatever.
Speaker 4 (48:42):
It's like like that's being present and being exactly there. Yeah,
people that you love it instead of just like that.
Speaker 2 (48:49):
I also, yeah, totally.
Speaker 5 (48:51):
I was just gonna say, I think it's like everybody
is still I think we're moving out of it. But
I think a lot of people are really too concerned
of how cool they look that they would rather like
if there's a path of like being cool or supporting
a friend, they choose the being cool thing and.
Speaker 2 (49:07):
Not everybody does.
Speaker 5 (49:08):
But it's frustrating and like starting a small business essentially
is what this is. Is you like, see, oh, yeah,
how strangers support you more sometimes than people that you're like,
I thought you were one of my best friends.
Speaker 1 (49:23):
This is interesting, heyya, because you know, because it becomes transactional.
That's what I found out, and that was that was
kind of what changed me at just once Very Cavalary ended.
There's a whole group of friends that disappeared, and I
was like, oh shit, why why just because it wasn't
like I don't know, maybe because I couldn't get as
many people to follow if I didn't tag you, I
can't remember. I don't I don't know. Yeah, it just
(49:45):
was like you're not they're not in I mean, we
live in Nashville, is like you know, good old boy city,
like the first you know when you get a number one,
like your god or it was like that for a while.
I remember like the first person you never remember one
was a cool person or like if you if you
were the hair stylist or the makeup artist for the
Top of the Top, and like everybody wanted to be
your friend and if you started to change that that
(50:06):
went away. And so I watched that. I mean I
literally was invited to every single event. I'm not invited
to anything, but like it's it's totally fine, I don't
want to go to those things. Well gave me anxiety
to go to them. In the first place, I understand that.
Speaker 4 (50:18):
I totally understand that I was up there for a
little bit, and then I and then the more I
kind of just go, oh, let me, I'm not I'm
still working, but I'm not.
Speaker 1 (50:29):
I don't need the approval being the best.
Speaker 2 (50:31):
I don't care about.
Speaker 3 (50:33):
Being the best.
Speaker 4 (50:33):
I don't care about And but it's gotten me to
a whole different place. And now it's become it's making
me a little.
Speaker 3 (50:40):
Bit more irrelevant. Yeah, I feel because I don't care.
It's it's also priority.
Speaker 1 (50:45):
You don't care, it's it's not holding. So someone told
me this one time that when you get to a
certain place in your life, whether it's in your profession
or in your knowledge, like you know, for me it's
been motherhood. But it's like you lose the competition. You know,
you know you're fucking great. You know you're you guys
both have done amazing people and you you know your talent,
you know it's good, and you're seeing like maybe younger
(51:06):
people come into the industry that need help or like
and people either mean to them or snarking them, and
you're like, you know what come on the podcasts like that,
like that of like I've reached this level of knowledge
and success and now I just want everybody to feel
encompassed by it. Is so much better than the person
who maybe is the top of the game and doesn't
allow anybody in because they're that cool. Like the person
(51:29):
who won't tag a friend's business because it would hurt there.
I don't know it would, they would hurt their algorithm.
I have no idea. You just I don't less somebody
unless somebody pays me. And you're like, yeah, who fucking
cares friends? Yeah, I think it takes like there's like
something that clicks. Whether it's age, I.
Speaker 4 (51:50):
Think, yeah, it's all about you priority. Your priorities are different.
Speaker 3 (51:56):
And and you you can.
Speaker 4 (51:58):
Sit back and go, wait a minute, it like I
need to like I'm responsible for my happiness and I
want to make me happy first, like I'm the most
important and what comes with that, like what makes me happy?
Speaker 3 (52:09):
What makes me the happiest?
Speaker 1 (52:11):
Right? Also, you're you know, you're in no competition. The
only time you have is your own zero right, Like
whether they're not great in life, I want that for you,
but that doesn't mean anything like for me.
Speaker 4 (52:21):
You know, literally everybody in our industry. I never we don't.
We're not here to knock anybody like I don't ever
look at somebody else that I'm like like, look at
There's nothing negative that will come out of my mouth about.
Speaker 1 (52:34):
You or unless you do something to me.
Speaker 5 (52:37):
Yeah, I feel in public, I'll tell you to your face.
Speaker 1 (52:47):
Now. I used to be like, you know, just kind
of silent about made my baby shower. And I've gotten
a fight with my best friend. We're still friends, nothing wrong,
but but you know, we got we got to look
a little argument. She was like, I just feel we
had this conversation. I feel attacked. I said, homegirl, we
have been best friends forever. You know, if I have
an issue, I'm gonna come to you. I might not
(53:08):
I might be a little pregnant and a little more
emotional and so it may come out little whatever, But
I'm never gonna I would rather tell you now how
I feel and let's work through it. Then like you
hear it from somebody, yeah right, you know that's and
if you can't handle that friendship, that's a friendship we
can't have.
Speaker 4 (53:22):
And that there's a lot of work to get there.
That's not something that's like just unless you're innately just
like that. Yeah, because because.
Speaker 1 (53:28):
You're afraid of losing it. And that's what Very Cavalaria
was for me. I was afraid of losing everything, so
like people please.
Speaker 4 (53:34):
So it's easier to be avoidant and do that whole thing.
But at the end of the day, the three of us,
we're all coasters. She's in La you're a Philly, I'm
in New York. So we have that in us, so
it's gonna be a little bit easier. Yeah, we've been
around that kind of energy and we're getting older, so
now we're like, oh it clicks where we can do that. Yeah,
(53:54):
but it's not an easy thing to go. Hey, let's
just sit down for five ten minutes. Let's hash this
out real quick.
Speaker 1 (54:02):
We need to do we need to talk about it,
hash out.
Speaker 3 (54:05):
Yeah, I love because I don't want it to do. Also,
I don't want to walk on eggshalls. I'm not walking
on Also.
Speaker 1 (54:11):
If it doesn't go anywhere that it feels good, we
can both leave amicably, Like there doesn't have to be
this splick.
Speaker 2 (54:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (54:17):
Yeah, there doesn't need to be like this like Instagram
breakup where we're like talking about each other. But you
can just be like correct, you know, yeah, you do
go in your boat. I'll go in mine, swim down
the river differently.
Speaker 3 (54:28):
Yeah, And it's up to you how you respond to
how I make you.
Speaker 1 (54:31):
Feel right, and how you treat me is not has
nothing to do with me. I've done nothing to initially.
I don't do anything to hurt you. So if you're
going to treat me like shit, that's a you thing.
Don't you have anything I'm not holding onto that.
Speaker 2 (54:42):
Yeah, that's a tough lesson to learn.
Speaker 1 (54:44):
Especially if you're people pleaser. Yeah, because would be like,
what did I do? Can I? Why are you mad?
Are you mad at me? Was like my number one
time mad at me? I'm so sorry, blah blah blah.
This is that when I meant and I'm like, I
know what I meant. I meant what I said. I
didn't mean any harm by it, and you're taking it
this way.
Speaker 5 (54:59):
God, isn't it it is to just go like sometimes
I'll I'll start like, oh my god, wait did I
say something to And then I just go, I'm just
gonna let it go. If I have to just trust
if like somebody has a problem with me, that they'll
say it.
Speaker 2 (55:12):
If not like I.
Speaker 5 (55:14):
Don't know, I don't know what what else to say.
I just gotta let it go.
Speaker 2 (55:18):
Yeah. Then I like just try to like I'll catch
myself and then I just go, I'm just gonna let
it go.
Speaker 1 (55:23):
Yeah, let it go, let it go?
Speaker 3 (55:27):
Said something?
Speaker 1 (55:28):
What was it you were? Like?
Speaker 4 (55:29):
Tuber?
Speaker 1 (55:35):
I really tried to get rid of my accent. I live.
Speaker 3 (55:43):
Wait, what's the Philly accident?
Speaker 4 (55:44):
Do like something?
Speaker 1 (55:46):
I mean water water?
Speaker 4 (55:47):
Yeah, you water water? But how do I say?
Speaker 1 (55:51):
October said, I didn't even notice.
Speaker 4 (55:54):
It's like a certain Philly.
Speaker 1 (55:56):
Oh, we're gonna have to get that clip because I can't.
I don't remember how I said, Okay, go back on
the spot. I can't do.
Speaker 3 (56:01):
It when I'm mad.
Speaker 1 (56:03):
When I'm mad, it comes out.
Speaker 6 (56:04):
Oh my god, what is it that you liked your
photo in October.
Speaker 4 (56:15):
A tuber?
Speaker 2 (56:22):
I call this when you get mad?
Speaker 1 (56:25):
Please you know?
Speaker 2 (56:26):
Yeah? Like, will you tell everybody? Uh where they could
find your podcast?
Speaker 1 (56:34):
Chris Mom's pod? What is that true? Actually? My girlfriend,
who's the my Courtney hus she she came up with
it because she was, you know, real Mom's dropping truth bombs?
Was it? So it was truth Mom's pod? And then
uh yeah, just follow us there and listen, watch and
if you're not a mom, we're trying to I want
to make it more. Speaking of which, we talked about
this when you started podcasting. Have an idea. Originally was like,
(56:57):
let's talk about mother and then I was like, wait
a minute, man, there's a lot of things that you
don't know if you want, if you want to become
a mom, or if you're looking, if you're looking in
that realm of being a parent in general, there's a
lot of shit that you just don't know until you
become that. Yeah, so like what if we just like
talked about health and wellness and stuff like that that
people can buy into, and then when if and when
(57:18):
that life cycle happens, you're like, man, I heard that somewhere, yeah,
instead of having to go find it because it gets
overwhelming when you're like, oh shit, I never There's so
many things that until I became I go get it. Man.
(57:48):
I tried to lose that accent for twenty some years.
Speaker 4 (57:51):
It's so specific.
Speaker 1 (57:54):
That's really funny.
Speaker 7 (57:56):
You know, Oh my god, everyone followed Brittany Taylor come
on your podcast.
Speaker 4 (58:02):
Oh I'm a mom, She's going to be a mom,
coming over. Yeah you have.
Speaker 5 (58:09):
I will be on your guests on your podcast while
I'm going through labor, so everybody can see my speaker.
Speaker 4 (58:15):
Yeah, we'll do live stream.
Speaker 3 (58:17):
We're going to get a rental mom.
Speaker 2 (58:18):
Yes, thanks for coming, perfect, Thank you much for coming.
Is great?
Speaker 1 (58:27):
What if?
Speaker 2 (58:28):
What a fun?
Speaker 4 (58:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (58:36):
Thank you guys so much for tuning in to The
touch Up Podcast. Please follow us on Instagram at the
touch Up Podcast. Follow us on TikTok at the touch Up.
If you have any beauty questions.
Speaker 2 (58:47):
Give us a ring six one five three three eight
five nine five three See you later. Bye,
I turn.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Get a little such up. Hi am Teren, I'm Mari,
and you're listening to Toup. We hope you're picking up
what we're putting down.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
So before I was pregnant, remember I.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Was already I think pregnant. But I remember you.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
Two hundred and twenty pounds at nine months pregnant.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
And now are you sorry if you didn't want to
share one thirty.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Twenty pounds, if it's like baby, because you're not thinking
about like the water, the uterus, that baby itself.
Speaker 4 (00:32):
Twenty.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
My dad's too twenty.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
I mean, I'm enjoying pregnant.
Speaker 4 (00:37):
That is a big girl. Yeah. But my body didn't
want anything healthy at all.
Speaker 3 (00:41):
Like I did not crave salads.
Speaker 4 (00:43):
I craved sandwiches, turkey wars, head yep sandwiches.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
My first I went to Chick fil a every day
and got a ice cream cone. Yeah. I was everybody
say right this one, this maybe one spicy and salty.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
Yeah. Oh see.
Speaker 5 (00:56):
I wanted my first trimester every day, like every meal.
I wanted something decadent. I ordered everything Postmates my first
I know, I was like, I don't care, I don't
want to make anything.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
I don't want a leftover. I don't want anything like that.
Speaker 5 (01:12):
And then my blood pressure was a little high, so
I've completely.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
They're like, okay, body, we're not going.
Speaker 5 (01:20):
To So now I've completely flipped it around and I've
been eating really really clean and i feel so much better.
And my blood pressure is very low now and it's fine,
not very low, but it's like normal now.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
So I'm like, Okay, you're feeling so much better. This
is really exciting. But what's also really exciting is that
we have an awesome guest.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I tried to be a little bit. I tried to
be like that so cool, but then I was like,
it's cold and I'm tired, and I'm weeks away.
Speaker 5 (01:46):
Yeah, pregnant, a bad bitch, a mother of one. You
also have a podcast.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
I do have a podcast. I have a little bit
more serious that. So I was like, oh, I fine, serious,
we just got we just got done doing it. I
literally learned from there to.
Speaker 5 (02:05):
Hear seriously silly, there's nothing serious about which is.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
So nice because he likes you know it is fine.
That's what I learned about birth. I mean birth, that
you have a better birth if you can laugh through it,
because you can't have two sphincters like tightened up, so
when you laugh, it opens spin. Everything's about which you know,
I mean literally there's no like welcome, welcome to absolutely
no care with all in birth and like like just
(02:30):
be naked and do whatever. But they say, like, you
know how like when you're when you're stressed, everything tightens up. Yeah,
so if you laugh, spry spincter. Yeah, it loosens your
sphincters and it helps the birthing process. So if you
can get someone to make you laugh the whole time,
like you'll have great birth.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Well, friends of comedians.
Speaker 5 (02:47):
Like right a bit right just for birth, Yeah, just
for my birthbit, just sphincter, the.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Birth bit and and the baby spin.
Speaker 4 (02:56):
Yeah are you sure.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Your sphincter it's such a funny word.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
It's such one of my favorite works.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Yeah, it's like, yeah, we did a birth class and
they were like, yeah, so you know when you're tightened up,
all your sphincters are tight, and they're like, try to
cry and try.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
To why are there are multiple sphincters? Am I Yeah?
Speaker 3 (03:13):
I thought there was only one.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
Spin you have that you have that sphincter and then
you have muel is. Yeah. But like if you think
about like holding, there's like different places in which like.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Okay, so sphincter is technically just like a whole.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Tighten muscle like something that's like, yeah.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
You're a professional as far as babies. Now, no, you're
like you know a lot.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
I know nothing.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
I have a child, and I don't know ship.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
I learned a lot more second baby, because I was
like first baby, I got pregnant. I was like, oh,
I'm pregnant mom, I'm gonna go look at all these
products and be like whatever. And then I looked back
into my Instagram, I'm like, you're fucking annoying. Second time around,
I'm like, let me just ask questions and chill out.
And it's been so much nicer this time to be like, okay, cool,
I know absolutely nothing and I'm learning everything.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
See that's how I was. People have so many questions
for me. They're like, all right, do you remember blah
blah blah when you were pregnant?
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Like no, oh yeah, I don't know. They're like, she goes,
who is your doctor?
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Why have you gone to a doctor yet.
Speaker 4 (04:11):
As a doctor black woman? I don't remember her name?
What was your plan? I was like, I had no
blacked out, blacked out literally didn't.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
I made a whole plan and I was like, I don't.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
Care, get it out. I think that my baby I
don't have. I'm going to Vanderbilt, which is.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
A great it's a great one.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Yeah yeah, but it's.
Speaker 5 (04:35):
A collective hospital, so you see a guy now until
your baby is born.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
And I didn't realize that. So I went to Centennial
and I remember asking I would be. I was like, okay,
so I'll see you.
Speaker 6 (04:44):
She's like, no, whoever's on call? Yeah, well she's like
she's like, I don't know. It's like a different person
that does my sonogram every time. And I go, yeah, bro, yes,
they're never going to get the same person. That's not
how it works.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
No, it's like that you're everybody's got it's just a
it's just a shift. Yeah, it's shift.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
You're never going to get the same person, which is.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Which is so then you get that's I think that's
why as a mom you get really like okay whatever.
Like I like first time around, like I was kind
of like, oh, you know, like I don't know, I
don't want to toot or do anything. Now I'm like,
let it all out. I'm naked whatever, because you just
see so many people, you get like humbled by it.
You're like, everybody's seen me naked at this point in
my most uncomfortable, like today I have to go. I
(05:26):
have to go do my strap bee swab, so like
I'm like, someone's going to swap my asshole today?
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Wait, what what do the.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Strap group strap or shrap be to make sure you
don't have that like bacteria.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
I don't remember that. Did I did that?
Speaker 1 (05:40):
You did it? I remember you did it at the
very end.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
I got my butthole swab. I don't even remember.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
It wasn't any soft swab then it must have been
in sin.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
Yeah. I got fisted when I was dilating.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
They're like they're like in there like this, like you know,
just swooping.
Speaker 4 (05:56):
Away is the worst because they induced me at the
seven weeks because Charlie wouldn't go and she was getting bigger.
She's almost nine pounds of thirty seven weeks, big, big girl,
big bebe big. I was ten four and then her
baby daddy six forty.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Oh so you had you had a tall bab yeah.
Speaker 4 (06:13):
Yeah, yeah. So every time they came in to fist
me to see how far. Yes, that's correct, that's what
they do.
Speaker 1 (06:19):
It goes all in. I mean you're you literally have
a whole size of a donut.
Speaker 4 (06:22):
Yeah. I said, I need an epidural because this is
the worst pain I've ever experienced in my life.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
And then they came before they came to do it again.
They came. She came with her fists towards me, and.
Speaker 4 (06:32):
I said, no, listen, fist fuck fristy fran fisty fran
frisky brisky fifty fist up.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
You wait, you give me drugs?
Speaker 1 (06:46):
Girl? What the The funniest part about it is that
like they do it so, I mean they're there, they're
ellendin or she must have had four or five other births.
Like to her, it's nothing like she does hundreds of
birds a day. And you're just like She's like, okay,
I gotta get in there. Yeah, and you're like, wait
a minute, give me dinner first. Yeah, could you say.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Hello, I know your name?
Speaker 4 (07:08):
Is it really real?
Speaker 1 (07:11):
God? Yeah, it doesn't very badly.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Let me know for like, would you like an epidural?
Speaker 4 (07:21):
You can have that in your I was going to
eventually have an epidural. I didn't know how bad the
fisting was going to hurt.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Yeah, Well, and there's a timing because you can't get
it too early and you can't get it too late. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (07:31):
And I don't think the technical term is like we're
like we're going to fist you, right, Yeah, it's a
it's a service channel.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
They're checking you. Yeah. Wow. Meanwhile, everything's like pulsating. The
baby's trying to push out, You're expanding, so like it
doesn't feel Why did they even you had.
Speaker 4 (07:51):
Well I had a section anyway, Yeah, because she wasn't
going she was chilling, she wasn't going anywhere.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
She's going to be three.
Speaker 4 (07:57):
Oh I love that age is my face bridge? Three
year old?
Speaker 1 (08:03):
We decided, yeah, a couple of my girlfriends have done
like the weight, and she convinced me because she was like,
there are very few surprises in life, and if this
is because we don't know, if this is last baby's
probably the last baby. Yeah, so I'm like, we'll just
do it. Yeah. We're also gonna do a home birth
so that we'll see how that goes really different this time.
First river is hospital because I was like, I'm not
gonna take any the chance. And then I was like,
(08:26):
as long as baby's healthy and we can do it,
we'll try to rall dog it and yeah it goes.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
Yeah, so you have an.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
I'm just gonna say the same thing, Mari.
Speaker 5 (08:36):
No, no, no, I was going to say the exact
same thing.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Please stop. No no, no, no. Wow.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
You guys know it's the first time I've ever said
that too.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
It's literally gonna be like, wait, do you have a doulata?
I literally was gonna say that, and you stole it.
You went in my brain.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
She's like implanted inside of me forever, every fiber of.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
My being for sharing DNA.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
At this point, I know any who do you?
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Yeah? I did a duel and a midwife this time.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Okay, okay, so I have the medical of a.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
Due and a midwife medical training. So a duela technically
is somebody that's there from mom. I came my Yeah,
my family is so far away. I didn't have any
support and so I was scared to death. So this
person is like making sure Mom's taken care of. Like
is everybody listening to mom? Is dad where he needs
to be or you know, parent where they need to be?
Like is the doctor listening advocating? Because there's a lot
(09:33):
of especially in you know, certain minority groups, a lot
of women are not are either talked down, you're completely dismissed,
and soul the duel's rule really came in because in
the throes of labor, you're not advocating for yourself. You're
just like, I don't get the fucking you know. And
so that person's like, wait a minute, she said she
didn't want that, Like that's the person that I needed
(09:55):
to talk for me in case, you know, Dad kind
of clammed up a little bit, which, so I wanted that.
And plus, postpartum dula is great because they come in
and they just give you that big hug that you
kind of need at the end, like like psychologically of
like are you okay, do you need Hey, I'm going
to hold the baby ball, you go take a shower, yeah,
kind of stuff.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
And so it was worth that's not a night nurse.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
It can be a night nurse, but a doula is
much more like.
Speaker 4 (10:21):
And there's those like them, beautiful energies too.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
I gave you gave me this woman named who's.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
Just such a duela because they're such a specific person. Yes,
you were born to do that, Yes, But she also
said that having a woman in the room with you
is does something energetically or something.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
Because it's almost like it brings back like a cultural
experience of like supporting mom, Like you're specifically supporting mom.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
She's like even just having a woman, a female in
the room, even if she's just sitting in a corner.
I don't know the science behind it. I kind of
it's like what she told me, but you should ask
her because it was really interesting.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
And it's basically renting a grandma because they had grandma's spirit.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
That's okay, yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Yeah, but yeah, it's basically like you know, you have
you have a grandma, you have you have a badass
grandma in the room. Yeah, that's really what it is.
Speaker 4 (11:13):
Forty right, but has that like you know, it's the
same kind of energy.
Speaker 3 (11:18):
It's a very beautiful, calm, peaceful.
Speaker 7 (11:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (11:20):
Yeah, and they're soledgeable.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
Some people love having like their Like I did not
have the relationship with my mom where I was like
I would want my mom to see me in that capacity.
So this was like renting a mom because like I
don't have that, Like I got to be strong for
my mom or I'm like I'm worried that my mom
would be worried, so it's like having that extra woman
of like just motherly.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
That's interesting.
Speaker 4 (11:42):
That's a really good like business idea.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
Because rent a mom. Yeah, can you guys, it's so cute,
but I'm here for the graduation.
Speaker 4 (11:53):
Yeah, my mom's a piece of ship. I don't don't dog. Ever,
I'd like to rented one.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
So I rented it.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
Yeah, she came to my graduation. Yeah, my wedding.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
My insurance page. Insurance paid for my second mom. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
Yeah, is this mom covered by insurance? That's funny.
Speaker 1 (12:10):
Yeah. And then midwife. Midwife is like kind of the alternative.
I hate to say it like that, but it's like
an OB and that they deliver. They deliver, but they
also have more medical background.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
So you have your doctor and your midwife. Yep.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
Some people, Yeah, some people do that. So I did.
I chose not to do the doctor out and I
went the midwif free route, which is more like it's
more like culturally woman focused than OB. I loved my OB,
but I was I think this round I wanted something
more holistic.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
M h, that's cool.
Speaker 5 (12:42):
God, there's like there's just so many choices. Yeah, so
many choices there's so many things.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
Yep, and you have a backup plan right in case,
like if anything.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
Yeah, that's all the whole board. So if this is happening,
we go here. If this is happening, we go here,
and yeah, so right now, or just literally have fairy
lights all around my room and just getting it ready
for putting in what we have, the pool, we have
the bed.
Speaker 3 (13:02):
What's the temperature.
Speaker 1 (13:03):
It's it's hot enough to kill bacteria.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
Smart, That's what I was trying to They keep it.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
They basically like it's literally like old school, like they
boil water or they and like they just keep heating
the temperature hot.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
So like even if it takes you twenty four hours.
Speaker 4 (13:17):
Yep, Wow there's a kid oiling the water.
Speaker 1 (13:20):
Yeah, and they'll keep they'll kick you out. So really
like a lot of people labor, but they don't birth.
So they'll labor and then birth in the in the
in the bed or something like that. Oh yeah, but
the idea of being in water and your hospital have
a too, Like if you can move around and you
put yourself in water, your body relaxes and so it
helps the laboring process.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
See that's what I'm like, because.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Cold they say anything saving thing when even if you
don't use water, like bring ship that will make you calm,
whether it smells or lights, like the way that my
yeah right, it didn't make me. They say, it's all
about right. They're like, because you think about like the
hospital lights are like literally the way that my duel
(14:01):
is said, she goes trying to birth, No, I.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
Have one, maybe not. We're going to send you a
list of from five to ten mothers that you can
rent for this.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
She makes and she bakes, see, and you can you
can bring them in here and just do like an
interview process.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Yeah that's a funny skit.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
That's a funny skits going, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
That's funny. Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
But yeah, they say. Basically the duel it was like,
don't try not to give birth in any in any
environment that you wouldn't have sex in, because it's basically
the same thing an intimate settings. So if you think
about hospital lights, you're like, oh, so he brings some lighting.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
In Okay, I was like, I like that fucking a hospital. Yeah,
here we.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
Are, but just like making it more cozy, like bring
your own bringing the.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Chances we could rent out Disney.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Yeah, like in the castle. Can I get birth in
the castle? I would like, I would like the West Wind.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
What about there's a place called the Poke Nose in Pennsylvania. Yeah, yeah,
you remember the champagne glass hot tubs. Oh sick, real sex.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
I imagine. And you're like, yeah, nice.
Speaker 4 (15:15):
Why Charlie was just sectioned out with like Gnarley Hospital.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yeah, but sometimes you have to go through that route
because it's the safest route.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Right, Well, there was no option there.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
That baby wasn't coming down the other way.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
We have to see where.
Speaker 5 (15:29):
Yeah, well okay, I guess like if you sang like
the lifts that you know, like read.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
I did, I say, uhl night you did as they
were as they were cutting. Yeah, it's just like it
was Christmas time.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
I love that night.
Speaker 4 (15:48):
And I remember your nurses going, she's singing, she sure.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
Keep going, let her have it. Worry about your own song, Yeah,
you worry about the organs and make sure everything goes
back fucked up. Think about it, because I think you afterwards,
they gave you seven layers to get through all of that,
right to get the baby out of your us.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
And you're like, but they watched it, have to take
your your and.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
You feel out nothing, you feel not nothing, but then
you have to move them around.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
Did you ever watch it?
Speaker 1 (16:18):
I watched.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
I watched it your own.
Speaker 4 (16:20):
No, I watched they give you a video surgery procedure,
like maybe a year after. I was like, I'm ready
to see what they did.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Happened?
Speaker 4 (16:30):
Holy ship? Yeah, you know what they do, right.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
They move things around to take the baby out.
Speaker 4 (16:37):
They don't just move it around. They take organs out
and put them on a table.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
I read that they don't always have to do that.
Speaker 4 (16:43):
Well that's what I saw, I believe. So I think
Tim said that he saw a couple of organs on it.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
How did he have sex with you after that?
Speaker 1 (16:51):
That's crazy?
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Took a long time.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
Apparently people offer see questions because of sex because I
don't see that part. But like sex after a vaginal
birth is just is like I mean, if somebody sees
a bowling ball coming out of your vagina, that's a
little scary too.
Speaker 4 (17:07):
You know, well that's gonna be hard because that's your vagina.
So you're like you tear for me, it's painful because
we're just like the healing is gnarly, but I'm fine
after nothing there, Like, yeah, for you guys.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
I want nothing to touch me for ten weeks. Yeah right,
well thank you.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
Yeah, who wants to have sex a man? A man
would want to have sex, right, but like I mean yeah,
I mean.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Baby, and you try to get it, like you touch
me and I'm going to kick your balls so hard.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Yeah yeah, no way, no, I'm get by.
Speaker 5 (17:45):
I read it ready for you the same site that
you can do, so you can shut the fuck up.
Speaker 4 (17:54):
Men are We're amazing. We are we are wild wild.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
You have those little apps where you're like looking at
like each week and.
Speaker 4 (18:02):
Oh you need those.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
I know.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
It's weird.
Speaker 5 (18:05):
I went to get my hair done and my my
girlfriend was like, oh, do you know what you're having.
I'm like, oh, yeah, yeah, I'm having avoid And she's like, oh,
you're just like so chill about everything.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I'm like.
Speaker 5 (18:14):
Yeah, she's like just some people are just so like
like just.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Like no, I'm just chill.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
I I.
Speaker 4 (18:24):
Should I be different?
Speaker 3 (18:26):
No, you should be exactly like that.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
Okay, yeah, yeah, Like I posted one thing.
Speaker 5 (18:32):
Uh, there's a movie called Night Bitch with Amy Adams
and it's weird, but it's about a woman who is
an artist or was an artist, and she had a baby,
and her husband decided to be the bread winner, breadmaker,
bread winner so she can stay up so she could
say that baby the first year or two, and she
(18:54):
loses herself and like it's this and she hates all
the moms that she goes to, like these kids snakes,
and I'm like this is very relatable, I'm sure to
so many people. And when she kind of finds herself again,
she goes to this class where all these women she
was like judging them and she was like whatever, But
(19:14):
there's this crazy speech that she gives and she's like,
do you ever just realize that we are God? And
that like what we do we create is the crazy
shit and that like just this whole territ Yes. But
I posted it and I was like me three months
into it, like just like I'm.
Speaker 4 (19:33):
God, Like.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
I have a penis inside of me.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
You literally have a portal that brings like.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Have a little spine inside there.
Speaker 5 (19:43):
Anyways, and some of my friends are like, oh my god,
do I have to like unfollow you?
Speaker 2 (19:47):
Blah blah. I'm like, what what does that mean? Anything
about it?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
That's whatever, Like people get people get weird about Like
I mean, I.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Had a lot of pregnancy stuff. You, I'm like, yeah,
I was.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Just because I didn't know. I didn't know anything. I mean,
my whole life is student to have a podcast, my
mother and just it was it did. It definitely made
me different. It changes you, Yeah, it.
Speaker 4 (20:11):
Has if it does not.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
What what something?
Speaker 5 (20:14):
Are you okay? Like something is major as happening in
your life? Yeah, we all change.
Speaker 4 (20:20):
Well then it doesn't stop changing it like you have
somebody that relies on you all.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Yeah, for forever forever. My one of my my friends,
T K. Mckimney, who does all the yes, I love him.
When I first became he was like something about like
when you know, when we're in our twenties and thirties
and living life, He's like, no one realized like we have.
It's very selfish, like we could just get up and
go do whatever, and now you have this like little
person that's like wait a minute, you can't throw me
in kennel and when like you know, you can't, you
(20:46):
can't put it baby and kennel like you do a dog.
And so you're like your whole world is like when
do I have sitters? Or when you know, when does
life go this? Or how do I get back to
work or and so you do. Really you have to
lose yourself a little bit and change yourself a little bit.
Nothing's going to be the same because you have you
have a human being. Yeah, you're in charge of a
human being.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
Yeah that is wild.
Speaker 4 (21:06):
And it's like, okay to be like this is fucking
a lot, because yeah, really hard. Like after I had Charlie,
there were moments where I would come to her house
and I would tell Tim, I'm going out for a
pack of cigarettes and I'm never coming back.
Speaker 3 (21:19):
What did I just do because of that?
Speaker 4 (21:22):
Because also I had her at thirty seven, which is older.
I mean, you're gonna be four.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
You'll be thirty. I'll be thirty six one.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
So yeah, you spend your whole life being selfish and
doing whatever you want and just leaving your house and
putting a jacket on and going to a bar and
doing this and that, and all of a sudden.
Speaker 3 (21:38):
One day you can't.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
You can't.
Speaker 4 (21:40):
And it's not like an overnight thing for some people
where they go, Okay, that's fine, this is it. I'm
happy being here. It's a really hard thing to process.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
I was the first one in my friend group to
have babies in like this setting, not like at home,
but like in our we call him danks duel and come,
no kids, what do you call them dinks? So even
in my neighborhood, Yeah, in my neighborhood, we were all dangs.
So I was the first one in my neighborhood and
the first one in my friend group to get pregnant.
And so watching everybody be like going to the bars
(22:12):
or going on trips like that was hard. Yeah, that's exactly,
And not because I regretted it or like it's just
because like, well, one I could go, but that would
require so much effort too. It's it financially fucked, you know,
like even like to go on trips, you gotta I
have to pay for a second person, pay for themselves,
(22:34):
you know, like so everything's double the work. So you're
just like, fuck, man, I gotta I gott to rethink
my life here.
Speaker 3 (22:40):
Yeah, but everything.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
Changes, everything changes, and sometimes it's hard. It is, it's
allowed to be hard. I think it's a lot. And
I don't think you're I think people get upset because
they're like you're either you're either supposed to be this,
like oh my god, I love mom. That's the best
thing in the world, which I do love, or you're
like an absent mother and that's it. There's no in
between of like that mom being like shit, they're having
the fun should be.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
And that's how honest I am.
Speaker 4 (23:02):
Like I always say, I can't imagine my life without
my daughter.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
I love her.
Speaker 4 (23:06):
She's my person. She's eight years old, she's my best friend.
I love her so much.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Do I think about when I lived on an island
by myself and smoked weed with Rocky?
Speaker 4 (23:13):
Yes? I do, Yes, I do.
Speaker 1 (23:15):
Did you actually do that? Yeah? I lived in Saint
Thomas for like two years.
Speaker 4 (23:18):
Okay, we'll have it cool, Yeah, we will get But also, Brittany,
I'm newly separated, so now I have her, I have
half custody, so I do fifty fifty.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
So it's every divorce every awful.
Speaker 4 (23:29):
So divorce is an awful people, right, it took a
while to get here, almost a year, because that's really weird. Imagine.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Yeah, Well, I think for me, separation would be I'd
have to like my worry would be having to try
the other person because I'm such a type a person
about like who what my kid does? And I I
gotta let you do your thing.
Speaker 4 (23:48):
Luckily we're both yeah, yeah, and I'm both on the
same page. As far as parenting. I think that we
do it pretty well. We always have so, but now
having that like every other week to myself, I'm like, yeah,
I love my daughter so much. But then I'm like,
all right, said Sunday at.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Six o'clock, But you get to poop by yourself?
Speaker 3 (24:10):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm there.
Speaker 4 (24:12):
Why are they always there?
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Like it doesn't I'm like, does smell not offend you? Like, hey,
you always sit on my lap? I'm like, can you
can you let me go.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
There hanging out with my parents while they pooped? But
I don't remember.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Much hoping with parents.
Speaker 5 (24:25):
You did, Yeah, I probably did. I'm a coda, Bennette,
I probably did. But I will say that's what I
really like about your podcast is that you are honest
and you do bring up, like I just think, things
that more people relate to that don't talk about.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
Yeah, and I appreciate that.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
I'm always been I'm the Aquarius. I tell everybody all
the time, it's just querious. Season is upon us. But
I'm going with the flow, and I'm like, look, you're
not gonna We're not gonna always get it right and
I'm going to learn something tomorrow that I didn't know yesterday,
and that doesn't make me good, better and different, and
I just don't like. I don't like that I Saturday
around listening to like you have to do this and
this is your baby's gonna react because you know, we
talked about we were talking about sleeping today on our podcast,
(25:07):
and I was like, my baby slept through the night
so long as I was holding her. And for me
that was okay. For some people you want to sleep train,
that's great, yeah, but like there's just so there's so
many ways to do it.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
Yeah, and we all.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
Just got to chill out. As long as you love
your kid and you do your best, dude, do anything
else matters.
Speaker 4 (25:24):
It's with everything too. It's literally what works for you right.
There is no right or wrong now. It's as long
as you're not as you're not hurting your child, as
long as you're not you're protecting your child, you're.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
Loving your child, and let's be honest, you're no matter what,
you're doing a great job your child. Up. Yeah, you're like,
there's one thing you will do that will put your
kid in therapy and you're gonna have no control whether
you're like I gave him a banana that one day
and they wanted a fucking orange, and now they hate
me and they remember it for the rest of it.
Because my mom will be like, my mom lasted me.
She's like, you're pretty up something that happened when you
(25:57):
were sixteen. I'm like, because it affected you know, but
that's just that's it, because you're going to do something.
But they're going to be like, man, my mom was great,
but then she wouldn't let me sleep in my pj's
for four nights. I hate her, you know, Like it's
just the way.
Speaker 5 (26:11):
They're also human womens that we're trying their best, and
like all we can do is either break generational trauma
and do it differently, or some of us end up
exactly like our parents.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
I have no idea.
Speaker 4 (26:23):
Yeah, but you're never going to break it fully, Like
it's not I could do all the work on myself,
but I still find things that I repeat that my parents. Charlie,
I'm like, I don't know if that's ever going to go.
Like that kid, she's gonna take that with her.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
And it's almost live in the age of the Internet.
There's just so much out there that it's almost more overwhelming,
I think than if we were like eighties moms. You know, yeah,
because like people, oh you remember in the eighties when
they had to like put those messages out there like
do you know where your kids are? You know? And
I was like, I honestly, what would that feel about it?
Speaker 7 (27:00):
These were wild predators everywhere parents did didn't care. They
coached us, they were our coaches, they were our teachers,
they were our friends, dads, they were everywhere there was.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
How did we die? I had?
Speaker 1 (27:12):
My mom was I'm like, I'm like, I'm not gonna
do sleepovers anymore. My mom was like why, I'm like,
because when I did sleepovers, we went to the nearest
park and drank like malt liquor until one of us
had to go get.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
A sum Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:24):
We used to speak out. We used to sneak out
a debris fontanas in your got bad. Yeah, I remember, yeah,
getting cars at fifteen years old. Ye fast.
Speaker 1 (27:38):
At twelve, I ran away from home and I got
in a car of an eighteen almost you hitch from
Philly almost Oh yeah, went down somehow Instagram fucking without
a phone and nowhere. Somehow she found me here, threw
me back in the car, served it. I did almost Arizona.
(28:01):
I was on it. I was in a train in Washington. Okay,
I'm like that type.
Speaker 3 (28:07):
I'm like very shocked right now.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
I just told you I moved. I broke up and
moved to an island. What do you mean I like
jump out of airplanes? I well, I mean I was crazy,
I was wild. I had had daddy issues, so I
just used all of that.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
Is that what makes you jump out of airplanes? Daddy issues?
Speaker 3 (28:23):
You're like interest in St.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Thomas, Sat Thomas. So I graduated from college. I had
I had a company with a boyfriend called College Mansion.
We was like it was basically like a party uh website.
So we were found the hottest girls by school, by class,
and by state, and we would make these huge parties.
Speaker 5 (28:39):
Yeah, and the girls gone wild before, girls gone wild
after girls gone wild after.
Speaker 1 (28:43):
Girls but like it was like girls gone wild, but
like Hooters, girls like they weren't like team wild.
Speaker 4 (28:49):
Okay, tame wild, tame wild, like we would have liked
of age.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
Age appropriate and like we had like they were dressed up.
There was like fashion. Okay, got it hot college girls
with fashion.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Sense, got it? Signed?
Speaker 1 (29:03):
No, no movies sometimes, okay, not all the time.
Speaker 5 (29:07):
How do you You can't get in a girl way from showing.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
Her ti sphincter. You can't. If somebody wants to show
you their buttle, they're going to drunk.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
I mean yeah, okay, so you we had this company
and then we broke up.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
She's getting her tips tomorrow, are you.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Yeah? Oh that's exciting.
Speaker 5 (29:30):
You know that one porn star that has like really
big boobs, that's the book.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
Yeah, yeah, that's the mood.
Speaker 1 (29:35):
That's I mean, like, think about Bunny. Bunny is my
new like like yeah, like that.
Speaker 4 (29:40):
Hers so much that her body's banging and she's routine.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
Yeah, are great.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
Yeah, she's an icon, she's hot, an icon.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Yeah, seems she has like the calm like Dolly Parton energy,
but like hot.
Speaker 2 (29:59):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
I I imagine that's how people felt about Dolly at that
like yeah her at that error.
Speaker 2 (30:04):
Yeah you know, yeah, holy crap, I know it's so hot.
Speaker 5 (30:07):
I even love her story. I love the hooking or
the sex work.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
I love all of it.
Speaker 1 (30:11):
Yeah yeah, because that's what I mean.
Speaker 5 (30:13):
Is that not how she like took care of Jelly
and his child. It's sex work, oh yeah, and then
she just made tons of money because she's so hot,
and then I don't want to do anymore. Like I
love I love that, right, maybe I love sex.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Work, but she also doesn't hide that, and I think
that that's what's cool and important about that is like
because I was, I was Hooter. I was actually in
the Hooters Hall of Fame and I hid that for
a very long time because the guy that.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
I dated her photo of Brittany right, I send to you.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
But but I was. I traveled all around the world
with like the Hooters group. But when I got to Nashville,
because I thought Nashville was like very I don't know,
the guy I dated at the time was very conservative
Christiani or whatever, and like was like, oh, I can't
believe you did that. So I never told anybody, And now,
like I should have gone the buddy round and like
I did this. I had nude photos on the internet
from an ex boyfriend.
Speaker 4 (31:03):
And you're like, look at my body, Like look at it.
Look how lot I am.
Speaker 5 (31:07):
Yeah, but nobody knew that, like things were going to
be so acceptable.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
Right because back then, because back then if you had
things like that that came out of the closet, that
was like like disaster, right, and now we're like, now it's.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
A career booster. Yeah, they're like, oh she is an
only fans, Oh we love that.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
The most famous girl in the world is the one
that when she like have a thousand people in one day.
That was like the whole thing. A couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 4 (31:30):
I just saw that read it. I think it was
like a model two she banged. That's how many guys
she banged in one day.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
And it went like super viral, and you're like, good
for her, she's made in she's a millionaire.
Speaker 4 (31:42):
Now she's a millionaire. Yeah, thousands people one day.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
They just like laid there and just like she.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
Wasn't very happy about at the end, but it would
be she she did it for science.
Speaker 4 (31:50):
Listen for science, anything for science?
Speaker 2 (31:53):
For science? What what science? What science?
Speaker 8 (31:55):
Though, maybe you know if you wouldn't take it, like
if the if the human body, if the human body
was able to take it, So is it anything?
Speaker 2 (32:07):
Yes, she did.
Speaker 1 (32:07):
She definitely the light bulb went out for a second.
She definitely lost mental She probably had some mental things.
She had it word through you's not. Yeah, I wonder
if there's just a lozingly well physically, I'm surprised. But
she so she lined up, signed.
Speaker 5 (32:24):
Up, signed up, So obviously like they got and they
did fifteen minutes.
Speaker 1 (32:29):
Fifteen drum and they have a documentary fifteen minutes.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
That's too much time?
Speaker 4 (32:33):
How much?
Speaker 1 (32:34):
Maybe it was five, I don't know it was. There
was enough. They all had to. They were criterious. I
just don't know what they were.
Speaker 4 (32:39):
Wow, your phone do fifteen times one thousand?
Speaker 2 (32:43):
Can anyone do that in the fifty thousand?
Speaker 1 (32:46):
How many minutes are in a day? I looked this up?
But anyway, she did it. She did it.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
She directs, well, fifteen times a thousand, you just carry
the zeros.
Speaker 3 (32:55):
Oh you're rain manning right now.
Speaker 4 (32:56):
I thought you were mathematically dyslexico.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
Zero's all right, God, so that's how many hours?
Speaker 1 (33:06):
But I'm saying, like, now she's got, she's a millionaire.
She's probably gonna end up on all the red carpets
and you're like, okay, cool, And she.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Doesn't have to have sex ever again if she doesn't want.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
To know, she doesn't, she doesn't. But my point is is, like, man,
I was like a shame to be a Hooters girl,
and then you have like people out there that are like,
you know what what happens when you reclaim that power
and you're like, you know what, I did it, who
cares whatever? And like life opens up.
Speaker 3 (33:28):
Judging that at all.
Speaker 4 (33:29):
Now there's also levels of like integrity that you have
to stand behind that, like, you know, you have to
be able to really truly not give it what your family.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
But if you're going to do it, if you're going
to do it, you have to be.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
Like fall in full in yeah yeah, like uh yeah, you.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
Can't make excuses for it. I was saying, like I
did the Hooters girl thing, and then I made it.
I was like, oh, you know, I did it. It's
like any extra money my boyfriend cheated on me and like, no,
I want to be a Hooters girl. I thought it,
and I got to travel the world. Yeah, that's how
I ended up in Saint Thomas anyway. So I broke
up with that boyfriend, I sold my share, and then
Hooters was like, hey, we have a Saint Thomas. We
need like a house mom. Basically because they were bringing
(34:04):
people in from the States because they weren't able to
get enough people to work that were on the island.
So they bring like eighteen year old girls from Kentucky
who had never seen an island before, and they were
not lasting for twenty four hours because they were like
balls of the wall.
Speaker 4 (34:17):
Sure yeah, So they.
Speaker 1 (34:19):
Needed someone to be like kind of like house and
I So I did that, and then I was only
supposed to be there for a couple of months and
I ended up being there for like almost two years.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
Wow yeah, wow, did you love it?
Speaker 1 (34:27):
I did? And then I moved to Miami and I
had even a more time of my life.
Speaker 4 (34:31):
We still working for Hooters, huh.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
I ended up doing marketing for them and then and
then I got to like yeah, and then they were like, hey,
we need this little arm of the business where we're
doing more community work. And so I got to work
with like non profits and forefronbs basically just where do
you put the money, which landed me like on the
field in Miami Dolphins, and like I got to hang
out at the you know, all the games of the
Heat and that's when the Heat was having like the
(34:53):
three like season, and so I was going to like
everywhere and I was like not, I was just a
normal person, not famous, no Instagram, nothing, but like they
knew me because they were the partnerships we had. Yeah,
so I got all the crazy tickets and I still
got to be like a normy, which was the coolest
thing because I did a lot of stupid ship and
I'm not on the inn that.
Speaker 5 (35:15):
I was, like, I think the heavens above yeah that
in my twenties there was no Internet, was no there
was internet, but there was no Instagram.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
That's right, but there's yeah no Instagram.
Speaker 5 (35:25):
Yeah, I think the heavens above that or that we
just wanted to We weren't trying to share because like
we had MySpace and stuff, but I wasn't inclined to
share all those things.
Speaker 1 (35:32):
No, Like I wasn't like I was on Instagram, but
I wasn't like, oh I want everyone to see that
I'm hanging out with like you know, Lebron's back in
the in the in the whatever, Like I never like
did it. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (35:42):
My Space was more like for thoughts, like yes, you
know what I mean. Then the Facebook was like like
because I just told the thought on or like whatever
they were, which is why why your post on your wall?
Speaker 2 (35:54):
You see what tarn right on our wall.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
Yeah, or like your five favorite friends on MySpace.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
You know that was like Tom was one of the
I was always was always one.
Speaker 3 (36:02):
He was my first friend.
Speaker 4 (36:03):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
As like the sub tweets and the quote you're like,
I'm just feeling very nostalgic today and like some like
random quote that people were like, Oh, I wonder what
she means by that.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
It still comes up the memories on Facebook, Like it.
Speaker 4 (36:17):
Was like fourteen years ago you said something really dumb
and you.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
Were like super passive aggressive against your ex.
Speaker 4 (36:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:28):
Good, now they face.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
Now they call them memes. You know that's not as fun.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
Yeah. Now they're just quotes that you just posted other people.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
Do you know You're like, what passive aggressive quotes?
Speaker 4 (36:39):
All inspirational ones that really hit.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
Yeah, you know I'm talking you know.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
You are like, oh god, is she mad at me?
Yeah that's funny. That's so funn I used to do that.
Speaker 5 (36:52):
I'll do any of that ship now no, no, do grown Well.
Speaker 4 (36:58):
Now you're now you're pregnant, You're gonna we're talking, well,
I gonna follow you.
Speaker 2 (37:02):
I mean, oh my god, it's so annoying.
Speaker 4 (37:04):
I might have you do. Yeah, Like it's so your
your pregnancy post was fucking hilarious. You're very silly, start.
Speaker 5 (37:13):
Talking about how it is. That's great, she was, but
also I don't want to feel bad about it.
Speaker 2 (37:17):
So just follow me.
Speaker 1 (37:19):
Yeah, just be fun.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Yeah, just follow everybody hilarious.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
I will say, like, there was a there was that
one maybe I don't know if she didn't say that,
there was this one ex that, like I have, I
had like an affinity towards like in my life. We
had like a basically like a summer rendezvous and we
still think about it. And I saw him just before
I found again. Yeah, it was like one of those
like maybe like long lost loves, you know. So I
(37:44):
saw him just before I found I was pregnant river,
and we were supposed to hang out because I was
like on a break with my boyfriend at the time,
and and like we were supposed to have that one
night and we just never did. I didn't go home,
and then like two weeks later I found out was pregnant,
and so anyway, he unfollowed me, and that hurt my feelings.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Are you married no boyfriend?
Speaker 4 (38:03):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (38:04):
Well long term?
Speaker 1 (38:05):
Well yeah, yeah, we've been other since for five years though. Yeah,
well that marriage isn't in my cards.
Speaker 4 (38:10):
Yeah, listen, I didn't. I didn't do it up until
we were together for ten years. Yeah, I mean we
did it like the last year.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
And a half. I thought.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
I fought with it back and forth, and I just
there's like just universe. It just doesn't. It doesn't. It
doesn't go with my flow.
Speaker 4 (38:25):
I get it, I get it, I get it.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
I don't not that again, It's not like I think
there's a people out there that are like, hey, it's
a universally religious or cultural thing. I just don't. It
doesn't speak the same to me.
Speaker 2 (38:37):
Yeah, and that's fine. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (38:39):
I think a lot of people, because you know, now
that I'm pregnant with somebody i'm dating, they're like, oh,
you guys gonna get married. I'm like, I'm not rushing.
He doesn't even live with me yet, Like I'm not rushing.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Shit.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:49):
Yeah, well I'm already having a child with somebody that
I've only been dating for not even a year yet.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
Yeah. Well, I was, I was. I was only it
was only about two years and when we did it
weren't even we weren't together at the time I found out.
Oh Jesu, I went I went home. I was like
a manic best crying on the internet about.
Speaker 2 (39:07):
Supposed to my ex.
Speaker 1 (39:12):
The lappening. And then and then like we called you.
He called me and he was like, hey, how don't
we just go have dinner and like talk about stuff.
And then we went you know, we went to dinner,
we talked about stuff, and I'm like, Okay, maybe we
can make this work. And then a week later, I'm like,
I'm not having your.
Speaker 2 (39:28):
Baby knock knock, who's there? You're a dad, and I
guess we should stay together.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
But I mean it worked out. We we were like
we're besties now and it's great. But like it's just
it's funny because people will ask, like your husband like
he'll he'll say it like out of feeling. I think weird.
But I'm like, that's my baby, daddy, my partner. He
hates partner for some reason.
Speaker 3 (39:48):
Because it makes it sound like gay.
Speaker 2 (39:49):
But is that what you think you should start calling
your lesbian?
Speaker 4 (39:54):
People think partner like for some reason, it's just a lesbian, yeah,
gay term.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
I don't know, I think.
Speaker 2 (40:02):
I mean, I don't take it that way.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
I don't I don't take that way either.
Speaker 2 (40:05):
I think some people yeah.
Speaker 5 (40:07):
No, if some girls like my partner, you don't think
you're like, it's probably a girl.
Speaker 1 (40:13):
Yeah, but I mean who like I'll even say, like, honestly,
I kind of like.
Speaker 3 (40:18):
A date with my girlfriend.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
Yeah I say that.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
I say all the time, like I have a date
with my girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
I said all the time too. That's the air we're from.
It is my girlfriend. Yeah, my friend. That's a girl.
Speaker 2 (40:26):
I think what you want.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
Also, who cares?
Speaker 4 (40:28):
I don't care.
Speaker 1 (40:29):
Does that bother you? If I like the badge and
had one come out of my badge, that's not your problem.
Here's what I said.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Literally, I'm not trying to eat your vagina.
Speaker 1 (40:36):
Yeah. Absolutely, you're not my type. Okay, I asked.
Speaker 4 (40:45):
I want to know your whole story about like cavaliery.
Speaker 2 (40:50):
Very.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
That's like not part of my my wheelhouse anyway, I know.
But you such a weird part of my life the world.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
This show or uncommon show.
Speaker 1 (40:59):
Okay, I still work for I still work on Yes, Yeah,
that's how it started. Now, it kind of started together.
So it's funny people. So I worked at Bartago at
the time as a I came to Nashville, literally came
to Nationville. Nothing I had like a my mentor passed
away in in Miami. I had the sea prey love moment.
I was great because it was one of those moments
of like sugar get off the pot for me, of
(41:20):
like where I was going to go. I went to
Bali and did this whole thing for a couple of years.
Way more I want to. I like, I walked up,
I hung out with like locals, like I have like
pictures of me like just like randomly getting on motorcycles
with locals. Like I don't know what the fuck I
was singing.
Speaker 3 (41:41):
No, didn't do anything.
Speaker 1 (41:43):
I just did it full sober.
Speaker 2 (41:45):
Just did you meet.
Speaker 1 (41:48):
I just had a full sober like yoga retreat to
myself like nobody around. That's my next thing, say, I
want to let's do it on the podcast.
Speaker 4 (42:03):
There's a shaman in Kentucky. There's a whole Is it legal, Yes,
so you don't have to go to like Thailand or
we don't have to go anywhere.
Speaker 1 (42:12):
That's with mushrooms, Like my first mushrooms were in Saint Thomas.
I feel like though, like it should be. I just
want the vibe.
Speaker 3 (42:20):
Yeah, we're gonna have to see what it looks like
if a.
Speaker 1 (42:23):
Tiger is not going to eat me. Then I don't
know that I want to do that.
Speaker 4 (42:25):
I don't want I don't want a tiger anywhere around me.
Speaker 3 (42:29):
I'm on Gandhi, Gandhi.
Speaker 4 (42:33):
You know, I don't want to know.
Speaker 1 (42:35):
I don't want to be with the spirits of the forest.
Speaker 4 (42:37):
So do I in Kentucky an hour away from home?
Speaker 3 (42:40):
No tigers?
Speaker 1 (42:41):
Yeah, fair, fair, but anyway, yeah, so he when they,
when they, when I did all that, the I met
a I met a priest, a Hindu prieste. We walked
up these stairs at this temple, and it was like
he showed me. It was crazy. Then he started drawing
what looks like this swasaga. But he said, and this
is the original Hindu symbol. Its flipped, I think, but
(43:03):
he was, when you see it, you see a symbol
of evil. And I said yeah, And he said, but
it wasn't originally a symbol of evil. This was a
symbol of hope. It's the mother Church and the churches
that go around and explains he explains hinta to me.
And he said, so you see what once was meant
as medicine or as good could be poisoned to you,
meaning that the environment I was in was now poisoned,
and so it's time to move on, time to go,
time to where I move on? And I was like,
(43:25):
I was like heard. And then literally I got home
and my girlfriend's like, I'm going to Nashville. And she
was a makeup artist. She moved back in Kentucky, but
she's taking a second time.
Speaker 4 (43:32):
And I was like, that's where you guys were that.
Speaker 1 (43:35):
I'm originally from Philly, but through Hooters, I knew Kimberly
and so she was like, I'm going to come to Nashville.
I was like, perfect, I'll go. And I literally like October,
we visited, November, she found the place, and Christmas Day
I drove from from Miami to Nashville. Spent Christmas by myself,
ate Chinese food, watched When did the whole Did the
(43:56):
whole thing? Wrote a letter to myself about like how
it was going to go, and so I basically came
with nothing, and then I moved. I got a job
of bar Taco and I was working in right now.
Speaker 2 (44:06):
I had it.
Speaker 1 (44:06):
When my baby showers are great kind of like.
Speaker 3 (44:08):
My story a little bit.
Speaker 4 (44:09):
You came on with, yeah, like.
Speaker 1 (44:11):
How how life just kind of finds a way, and
so I was working in events and stuff and Mark
Block was good folks, Yeah, I was working. I was.
I was a Block girl for a while. And he
came to a lot with Kristen modeling. Yeah, he came
to lund with Christen introduced us and he was just
talking about certain things like, oh, like if you need
help with this butt, you knows this, Like he was
like really cool about it. And then a couple weeks
(44:32):
later he was like, Hey, she's actually doing a show,
but she does need people to work for her for real.
So you're going to do two things. You're going to
interview for the show with the casting people and then
you're going to go to a coffee shop and you're
gonna interview with Kristin, So bring your resume. So technically
both they were hired at the same time. But I
made that decision in my mind that like, I was
(44:54):
not very good on reality TV.
Speaker 2 (44:55):
I was.
Speaker 1 (44:55):
I know, I was boring because I just did I
was again like I was hiding myself. I didn't want
I didn't want to be I don't know. I just
I felt like I couldn't play at the role. So
which was fine because it ended up being now here
I am seven years later, still working for un Common
James and having that job and that stability, and that's
where I was going and so and now even if
I move on or whatever we choose to do from here,
(45:17):
like I have Kristen and that experience in my background,
but very cavalary, Like the show was such like a
mind fuck. I was just well, I was dating the
wrong person at the time. That was really hard, and
we had like a really bad breakup. We're cool now,
but that was like that was tough. And then also
like the person, like some of the girls that I
(45:39):
was on the show with, we ended up not getting
along again. That's all kind of fixed and yeah forwards, yeah, yeah,
but at the time, it was like I was so
scared to lose what felt like a new life blood
because I had nothing, and so I was like here,
they're like, here's money for the show, and here's your
salary for this, and so I was getting all of
these like I only having money and finally being able
(46:01):
to do so I was so scared to do it all. Yeah,
and it just it made me it maybe not a
nice person to a lot of.
Speaker 4 (46:09):
People something, Yeah, because I was cool to admit, yeah,
be aware of that.
Speaker 1 (46:13):
Because I think the people think like you go through shit,
like when things happened to you, it's bite, flight or freeze.
But I think there's also like masking, Like I masked
a lot of stuff, sure, because I was scared.
Speaker 3 (46:25):
And then you project a different part of you.
Speaker 1 (46:27):
That's right, yeah, right, And even I even look back,
I was I was one hundred and seventeen pounds. I
was like, I was like, I was like stressed, skinny,
like too skinny. I was like so focused on myself,
like and not that people who take selfies are bad,
I just I just remember, like I took a lot
of pictures of myself to prove to myself that I
was beautiful enough and good enough and smart enough and
(46:48):
fuck the world, you know. And now I'm like, yeah,
I am like who cares if I'm not for anybody else,
like enough for myself. But it took what seven years
to get there.
Speaker 2 (46:57):
Yeah that's okay, you got that?
Speaker 4 (46:59):
Yeah, yeah, on that that's the most important part.
Speaker 1 (47:01):
Ye.
Speaker 2 (47:01):
Yeah, I'm glad you still have a great relationship with Kristen.
Speaker 1 (47:03):
Yeah. Thanks, Yeah, she's funny as podcast.
Speaker 2 (47:07):
Yeah, she's got a great podcast.
Speaker 1 (47:08):
Have you guys done one day. I feel like you
guys would end up being really great together. Or even
Justin's Justin' come on here.
Speaker 5 (47:13):
Uh he had to wait, but he's coming for a
contract to Yeah he'll that's he'll be on soon.
Speaker 1 (47:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:20):
Yeah. And Justin Anderson, I feel like I feel like that.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
I feel like the energy troll. He is like the
most high energy, like like the vibration in the room
just changes. Like he is a and you'll.
Speaker 2 (47:35):
Love him and then you guys will start working out together. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (47:38):
Yeah, he's gonna be bro.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
He he pumps bro.
Speaker 1 (47:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:42):
But he's also like husband are so funny and.
Speaker 1 (47:46):
And they're also like they're also like the they're also
like the women Empowerment Gaze, Like they're like they're the
friends that you want in your court, like yeah, not
the cat love you know they love you and yeah
yeah they love you. They want the best for you,
to always think about you. Like just and I aren't
like close. He's close to Christian because we're all kind
of nice. Like he'll write me just like hey, you're
(48:07):
a great mom. Like like he'll like you know, like
like Malia had his start a baby and like he
was like, oh, you know, you guys have beautiful babies
or he's just so like he's just so good and
genuine important people like the world will lose an angel
when I like if and when that that man goes.
Speaker 4 (48:25):
We were just talking about people who listen words. Actions
speak louder than fucking words. That's a period, period, period, period,
like showing up for people that you love, that you
truly care about and saying those things are everything.
Speaker 1 (48:38):
Yeah, it's better than better than sending a gift or whatever.
Speaker 4 (48:42):
It's like like that's being present and being exactly there. Yeah,
people that you love it instead of just like that.
Speaker 2 (48:49):
I also, yeah, totally.
Speaker 5 (48:51):
I was just gonna say, I think it's like everybody
is still I think we're moving out of it. But
I think a lot of people are really too concerned
of how cool they look that they would rather like
if there's a path of like being cool or supporting
a friend, they choose the being cool thing and.
Speaker 2 (49:07):
Not everybody does.
Speaker 5 (49:08):
But it's frustrating and like starting a small business essentially
is what this is. Is you like, see, oh, yeah,
how strangers support you more sometimes than people that you're like,
I thought you were one of my best friends.
Speaker 1 (49:23):
This is interesting, heyya, because you know, because it becomes transactional.
That's what I found out, and that was that was
kind of what changed me at just once Very Cavalary ended.
There's a whole group of friends that disappeared, and I
was like, oh shit, why why just because it wasn't
like I don't know, maybe because I couldn't get as
many people to follow if I didn't tag you, I
can't remember. I don't I don't know. Yeah, it just
(49:45):
was like you're not they're not in I mean, we
live in Nashville, is like you know, good old boy city,
like the first you know when you get a number one,
like your god or it was like that for a while.
I remember like the first person you never remember one
was a cool person or like if you if you
were the hair stylist or the makeup artist for the
Top of the Top, and like everybody wanted to be
your friend and if you started to change that that
(50:06):
went away. And so I watched that. I mean I
literally was invited to every single event. I'm not invited
to anything, but like it's it's totally fine, I don't
want to go to those things. Well gave me anxiety
to go to them. In the first place, I understand that.
Speaker 4 (50:18):
I totally understand that I was up there for a
little bit, and then I and then the more I
kind of just go, oh, let me, I'm not I'm
still working, but I'm not.
Speaker 1 (50:29):
I don't need the approval being the best.
Speaker 2 (50:31):
I don't care about.
Speaker 3 (50:33):
Being the best.
Speaker 4 (50:33):
I don't care about And but it's gotten me to
a whole different place. And now it's become it's making
me a little.
Speaker 3 (50:40):
Bit more irrelevant. Yeah, I feel because I don't care.
It's it's also priority.
Speaker 1 (50:45):
You don't care, it's it's not holding. So someone told
me this one time that when you get to a
certain place in your life, whether it's in your profession
or in your knowledge, like you know, for me it's
been motherhood. But it's like you lose the competition. You know,
you know you're fucking great. You know you're you guys
both have done amazing people and you you know your talent,
you know it's good, and you're seeing like maybe younger
(51:06):
people come into the industry that need help or like
and people either mean to them or snarking them, and
you're like, you know what come on the podcasts like that,
like that of like I've reached this level of knowledge
and success and now I just want everybody to feel
encompassed by it. Is so much better than the person
who maybe is the top of the game and doesn't
allow anybody in because they're that cool. Like the person
(51:29):
who won't tag a friend's business because it would hurt there.
I don't know it would, they would hurt their algorithm.
I have no idea. You just I don't less somebody
unless somebody pays me. And you're like, yeah, who fucking
cares friends? Yeah, I think it takes like there's like
something that clicks. Whether it's age, I.
Speaker 4 (51:50):
Think, yeah, it's all about you priority. Your priorities are different.
Speaker 3 (51:56):
And and you you can.
Speaker 4 (51:58):
Sit back and go, wait a minute, it like I
need to like I'm responsible for my happiness and I
want to make me happy first, like I'm the most
important and what comes with that, like what makes me happy?
Speaker 3 (52:09):
What makes me the happiest?
Speaker 1 (52:11):
Right? Also, you're you know, you're in no competition. The
only time you have is your own zero right, Like
whether they're not great in life, I want that for you,
but that doesn't mean anything like for me.
Speaker 4 (52:21):
You know, literally everybody in our industry. I never we don't.
We're not here to knock anybody like I don't ever
look at somebody else that I'm like like, look at
There's nothing negative that will come out of my mouth about.
Speaker 1 (52:34):
You or unless you do something to me.
Speaker 5 (52:37):
Yeah, I feel in public, I'll tell you to your face.
Speaker 1 (52:47):
Now. I used to be like, you know, just kind
of silent about made my baby shower. And I've gotten
a fight with my best friend. We're still friends, nothing wrong,
but but you know, we got we got to look
a little argument. She was like, I just feel we
had this conversation. I feel attacked. I said, homegirl, we
have been best friends forever. You know, if I have
an issue, I'm gonna come to you. I might not
(53:08):
I might be a little pregnant and a little more
emotional and so it may come out little whatever, But
I'm never gonna I would rather tell you now how
I feel and let's work through it. Then like you
hear it from somebody, yeah right, you know that's and
if you can't handle that friendship, that's a friendship we
can't have.
Speaker 4 (53:22):
And that there's a lot of work to get there.
That's not something that's like just unless you're innately just
like that. Yeah, because because.
Speaker 1 (53:28):
You're afraid of losing it. And that's what Very Cavalaria
was for me. I was afraid of losing everything, so
like people please.
Speaker 4 (53:34):
So it's easier to be avoidant and do that whole thing.
But at the end of the day, the three of us,
we're all coasters. She's in La you're a Philly, I'm
in New York. So we have that in us, so
it's gonna be a little bit easier. Yeah, we've been
around that kind of energy and we're getting older, so
now we're like, oh it clicks where we can do that. Yeah,
(53:54):
but it's not an easy thing to go. Hey, let's
just sit down for five ten minutes. Let's hash this
out real quick.
Speaker 1 (54:02):
We need to do we need to talk about it,
hash out.
Speaker 3 (54:05):
Yeah, I love because I don't want it to do. Also,
I don't want to walk on eggshalls. I'm not walking
on Also.
Speaker 1 (54:11):
If it doesn't go anywhere that it feels good, we
can both leave amicably, Like there doesn't have to be
this splick.
Speaker 2 (54:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (54:17):
Yeah, there doesn't need to be like this like Instagram
breakup where we're like talking about each other. But you
can just be like correct, you know, yeah, you do
go in your boat. I'll go in mine, swim down
the river differently.
Speaker 3 (54:28):
Yeah, And it's up to you how you respond to
how I make you.
Speaker 1 (54:31):
Feel right, and how you treat me is not has
nothing to do with me. I've done nothing to initially.
I don't do anything to hurt you. So if you're
going to treat me like shit, that's a you thing.
Don't you have anything I'm not holding onto that.
Speaker 2 (54:42):
Yeah, that's a tough lesson to learn.
Speaker 1 (54:44):
Especially if you're people pleaser. Yeah, because would be like,
what did I do? Can I? Why are you mad?
Are you mad at me? Was like my number one
time mad at me? I'm so sorry, blah blah blah.
This is that when I meant and I'm like, I
know what I meant. I meant what I said. I
didn't mean any harm by it, and you're taking it
this way.
Speaker 5 (54:59):
God, isn't it it is to just go like sometimes
I'll I'll start like, oh my god, wait did I
say something to And then I just go, I'm just
gonna let it go. If I have to just trust
if like somebody has a problem with me, that they'll
say it.
Speaker 2 (55:12):
If not like I.
Speaker 5 (55:14):
Don't know, I don't know what what else to say.
I just gotta let it go.
Speaker 2 (55:18):
Yeah. Then I like just try to like I'll catch
myself and then I just go, I'm just gonna let
it go.
Speaker 1 (55:23):
Yeah, let it go, let it go?
Speaker 3 (55:27):
Said something?
Speaker 1 (55:28):
What was it you were? Like?
Speaker 4 (55:29):
Tuber?
Speaker 1 (55:35):
I really tried to get rid of my accent. I live.
Speaker 3 (55:43):
Wait, what's the Philly accident?
Speaker 4 (55:44):
Do like something?
Speaker 1 (55:46):
I mean water water?
Speaker 4 (55:47):
Yeah, you water water? But how do I say?
Speaker 1 (55:51):
October said, I didn't even notice.
Speaker 4 (55:54):
It's like a certain Philly.
Speaker 1 (55:56):
Oh, we're gonna have to get that clip because I can't.
I don't remember how I said, Okay, go back on
the spot. I can't do.
Speaker 3 (56:01):
It when I'm mad.
Speaker 1 (56:03):
When I'm mad, it comes out.
Speaker 6 (56:04):
Oh my god, what is it that you liked your
photo in October.
Speaker 4 (56:15):
A tuber?
Speaker 2 (56:22):
I call this when you get mad?
Speaker 1 (56:25):
Please you know?
Speaker 2 (56:26):
Yeah? Like, will you tell everybody? Uh where they could
find your podcast?
Speaker 1 (56:34):
Chris Mom's pod? What is that true? Actually? My girlfriend,
who's the my Courtney hus she she came up with
it because she was, you know, real Mom's dropping truth bombs?
Was it? So it was truth Mom's pod? And then
uh yeah, just follow us there and listen, watch and
if you're not a mom, we're trying to I want
to make it more. Speaking of which, we talked about
this when you started podcasting. Have an idea. Originally was like,
(56:57):
let's talk about mother and then I was like, wait
a minute, man, there's a lot of things that you
don't know if you want, if you want to become
a mom, or if you're looking, if you're looking in
that realm of being a parent in general, there's a
lot of shit that you just don't know until you
become that. Yeah, so like what if we just like
talked about health and wellness and stuff like that that
people can buy into, and then when if and when
(57:18):
that life cycle happens, you're like, man, I heard that somewhere, yeah,
instead of having to go find it because it gets
overwhelming when you're like, oh shit, I never There's so
many things that until I became I go get it. Man.
(57:48):
I tried to lose that accent for twenty some years.
Speaker 4 (57:51):
It's so specific.
Speaker 1 (57:54):
That's really funny.
Speaker 7 (57:56):
You know, Oh my god, everyone followed Brittany Taylor come
on your podcast.
Speaker 4 (58:02):
Oh I'm a mom, She's going to be a mom,
coming over. Yeah you have.
Speaker 5 (58:09):
I will be on your guests on your podcast while
I'm going through labor, so everybody can see my speaker.
Speaker 4 (58:15):
Yeah, we'll do live stream.
Speaker 3 (58:17):
We're going to get a rental mom.
Speaker 2 (58:18):
Yes, thanks for coming, perfect, Thank you much for coming.
Is great?
Speaker 1 (58:27):
What if?
Speaker 2 (58:28):
What a fun?
Speaker 4 (58:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (58:36):
Thank you guys so much for tuning in to The
touch Up Podcast. Please follow us on Instagram at the
touch Up Podcast. Follow us on TikTok at the touch Up.
If you have any beauty questions.
Speaker 2 (58:47):
Give us a ring six one five three three eight
five nine five three See you later. Bye,
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