February 5, 2025 • 51 mins
Kathleen Madigan is one of the funniest comedians on the planet and this week…. she is hanging with us! Oh, and it’s a special 2 part event! We chat about her career, upbringing, and life on the road. We just can’t get enough! We had so much fun so enjoy this episode!
See ya later,
BYE💋
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@officialkathleenmadigan
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
I get a little touch up. Hi am teren Mari.
And you're listening to we hope you're picking up what
we're putting down.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
You know, I was reading about the Haarkles, Megan and
Harry and they're a fucking podcast and they.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
The Prince, the Prince, the Prince of the Markle.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Your hat's sitting a little.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
High, buddy, Oh is it? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (00:30):
Yeah, that's better. He looks like a little drunken counts
a night.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Wonderful, wonderful.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Spotify gave them twenty extra million dollars, extra extra because
the the company that had to take over the podcast
because they couldn't do it because they're stupid. And I thought,
this is how podcast studio. Where's the twenty million.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Going in twenty Yeah, they're just pocketing it.
Speaker 4 (01:06):
It says we have less than this and it works.
Speaker 5 (01:08):
Fine, So they're pocketing it's I guess that's how much
they're getting.
Speaker 4 (01:12):
That was just bonus extra money.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
I didn't even know they had a podcast.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
They don't, that's what's like.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Okay, So that Spotify gave them one hundred million dollars
and they were supposed to they they produced over all
this time only I think eight to twelve episodes and
it's just Megan talk.
Speaker 4 (01:30):
Harry's not involved.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
It's just Megan interviewing like Serena Williams. But then they
said she didn't even do some of the interviews. They
just put her in the thing. Anyway, it didn't work.
Spotify was like they weren't getting any content, so they
hired a company to take over.
Speaker 4 (01:45):
But they gave those people. Those people were like, well,
we're gonna need twenty million to fix it. What look
around us, like, this is all you need. I don't
understand where the twenty million? Is it? The green room?
Speaker 2 (01:58):
No, like they did Kelly Carson Show was the most
awesome thing ever.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
So if you're waiting, you're the guest of archetype. I
think that's what I call it. I don't know if
it's arch type or.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Arch podcast or archetype, archetype, archie type.
Speaker 4 (02:15):
Another mistake.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Yeah, I want to know so about that.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Their company and their podcast was called oh oh, I
don't know.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
It's probably for their their time.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
I think it's because it's them.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
It's them, what do you mean.
Speaker 5 (02:29):
I think it's just because it's like they were like me,
they yeah, oh, they just.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
Gave it the company said it though the fix it company,
because nothing was getting done from these morons, and they
were like, okay, Spotify hired a company to go in
and basically crack the whip and let's go.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
Let's go.
Speaker 4 (02:46):
And those people said we need twenty million. But I'm like, wow,
every podcast I do, of all my friends and stuff.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Is just slow budget. Nothing's over ten ten grands. No, nothing.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
That board from Guitar Center. Yeah, if you wait till
that Christmas, well, yeah, try, that's right.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
They're happy to see you a good Yeah, the most records.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Yeah, the cameras are the most expensive, right, but even
like somebody like Alex Cooper, her cameras are maybe I
don't know, six seven eight grand each, right, that's a
lot of that's a lot of money, it is, but
it's not twenty million dollars.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
It's not twenty million dollars.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
But her contract is insane. I'm sure. I don't or
like Joe Rogan, he probably.
Speaker 4 (03:34):
I don't know what these people works.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
For their time. It's for them to keep going. I
have no idea.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
I think it's because of the royals.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Oh, because they're royales.
Speaker 5 (03:42):
You quit be a royal, you're still you're still technically
a royale though, I mean it's like royale in your blood.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
He is, she's not, but he's still.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
You can am I missing? Did they get divorced? No?
Speaker 3 (03:56):
No, they they stepped down from being royal whitman royal.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
Do you remember a thing that gave them a.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
Racist because somebody was, uh, looked at her weird?
Speaker 4 (04:08):
Well this is what I thought too. Oh my god,
a castle full of.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Am I getting information wrong over there?
Speaker 4 (04:15):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (04:15):
Jody google it? Will you produce this? There's too much information.
Speaker 3 (04:19):
That's like the weirdest reason to like, de Throw.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
Was mad at somebody, and she's mad that a castle
full of old, wise British people might be racist.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
Shocking for sure. I can't belive you Paula Dean used
the end words. Really, you can't. I totally think she'd
dos it every five minutes.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
And I can taste the racism in her food. It's
in the midder, in the old it's racist. Yeah, it's
a little anti, but you know that's where like semi, if.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
You're Megan, look, you just agreed to marry into this.
You've seen them on television. Does Prince Charles look like
a get around town kind of guy.
Speaker 4 (05:14):
No, I mean maybe not super duper uptight British white.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
And I wonder like has he ever tried Indian food? Like,
we don't know these things about him. We don't know
anything about him.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Know, he's an earth guy. He was to save the
planet guy before everybody else was. He's all about organic
food and.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, cool, great, we'll get on that.
Speaker 4 (05:37):
Yeah, he did what his father would deem soft things
code for this kid might be gay. That's what his father.
I didn't say that sauce.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
No, not that kind of sung like like he was
a terrible athlete and he just he didn't want to
do what he things things. And he said to one
of these schools that you got to be a human
and wasn't a he man.
Speaker 4 (06:06):
Yeah, he wanted a garden.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Well we have to have a gay prince. You too
about your prince? You might be gay?
Speaker 4 (06:13):
Well he could not.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
No, No, they're not married to somebody.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
There's not.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
In in the royal family royalty personally, Google, okay, gay
royalty person I don't know gay royalty exist.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
I mean, we we all know it exists in the
drag drag industry in.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
A super liberal country like a super progressive nation, like
who still has royalty?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Though it's like Sweden Denmark?
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Right there we go? What where's Parma? Where's Pharma?
Speaker 4 (07:00):
Those people dead?
Speaker 5 (07:01):
Prince actually really surprising me too. So that's like India
and who and Lord.
Speaker 6 (07:13):
Lord Mount Mountain, Boston, Mount Mount Button That that was.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
Prince Charles's uncle. That the IRA, the Irish Queen Elizabeth.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Not only are you royalty, but then you're related to
other royalty? How wild is that?
Speaker 4 (07:42):
Wow? How progressive? Cool?
Speaker 1 (07:44):
We love that in the world. Is Yeah, you're good.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Fine, Yeah, probably try to get a hold of him
and say, can you family at the day at the Yeah, these.
Speaker 4 (07:54):
People are kind of up tight. Yeah, and I need
like a hip person. Yeah. She dropped the ball, drop it.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
She dropped the ball, but then she picked it back
up and said, I'm going to need twenty million does.
Speaker 4 (08:07):
And I'm gonna need you know, and it's going to
have to be a twenty.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
They live in Montecito. Do I not read the paper?
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Where are you?
Speaker 3 (08:15):
Where is where's Monacita?
Speaker 4 (08:17):
It's by Santa Barbara.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
It's an hour and a half hour thorn?
Speaker 5 (08:20):
Okay, yeah, do you remember they left the whole kingdom
though right now, Wow.
Speaker 4 (08:25):
You miss all that?
Speaker 1 (08:27):
Yeah, holy shit?
Speaker 4 (08:31):
Do you read like the news every day?
Speaker 1 (08:33):
Or no?
Speaker 4 (08:33):
Ohkay?
Speaker 1 (08:34):
Absolutely?
Speaker 5 (08:34):
No, absolutely, But also like we don't really know a
lot about the royals anyway, Like we really shouldn't.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
There are people who are There's so much information out
there and so much going on in the world, it's
hard to like keep up with it all.
Speaker 4 (08:48):
What do you read every day? Anything?
Speaker 1 (08:50):
I'm too dyslexic to read. I can't read, Okay, So
I would you listen to I listened to like self
help books. I'm about to listen to this book I'm
really excited about. It's called The Power of Habit.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
Oh, tell us about it?
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Oh that's all I know.
Speaker 4 (09:06):
It just sounds strict.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
It sounds great. Twenty one days to break a habit?
Speaker 4 (09:10):
Correct? Is that correct?
Speaker 1 (09:11):
I don't know. I haven't read the it is Yeah, yeah,
that's it.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Yes, to break a habit, to break a habit?
Speaker 1 (09:17):
Yeah, what about forming a habit twenty two days? Okay?
Speaker 4 (09:22):
That sounds like a drill. Start.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
It sounds like a drill.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
That title makes me nervous.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
What kind of habits?
Speaker 3 (09:28):
I don't want to break?
Speaker 1 (09:29):
I just want to be better? We all want to
be better, like just everything. I feel like my morning
routine isn't the same every day except for taking the
dogs out, you know what I mean. Like I'd love
to like adwer meditate, but I don't have the willpower,
do you, guys?
Speaker 3 (09:50):
I'm pretty I'm pretty regimented in the morning, just.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Because it starts with the gym.
Speaker 5 (09:54):
Like and having a child, you got to wake up, well,
got to be like the kid thing. I guess, yeah
they're up. Yeah, that keeps you like regimented. But no,
as far as journaling, my fingers start hurting my hands
after writing for a while.
Speaker 4 (10:14):
What's wrong with your off?
Speaker 1 (10:17):
I just don't write a lot writing though, like even
like writing like a check sometimes.
Speaker 4 (10:23):
You guys, I know nothing wrong with you.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
You don't do it. You're always typing. Everything's like type
you write iPad. Kathleen writes, well.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
I paint too so o. But I mean, I don't
know my hands a painter for fun. It's nothing I would.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
Show in public, so you won't show.
Speaker 4 (10:42):
You know what I am. I'm the greatest hack. I'm
a great hack. Like, if you give me a picture,
I can paint it. It will look just like that.
But I can't think of.
Speaker 3 (10:50):
Things on my own.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
Like if you give me a blank canvas and say,
paint whatever you want, I don't know what. That's not
a hack, that's actually no, I'm I'm a copy artist.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Really yeah, that's an impressionists and impressionist Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
Well no, because the impressionist thought of their own ship.
I can only copy what they do, Like I should
be kind of somebody should hire me for the criminal
part where you make copies?
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Can you make this monet? Absolutely?
Speaker 4 (11:15):
Mine would get found out though you do like realism.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
The eyes are a little cross, Yeah, they'd be like
a little higher than the other.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
Oh shit, I forgot it's mustache.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Like it would be something blatant where I'd turn it
in and go done. Wait, I guess I don't write,
But even writing, I don't think it.
Speaker 4 (11:38):
I don't know why your hands tuck her out.
Speaker 5 (11:40):
Maybe because we're always like this now, we're always like
this writing.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Like when I start writing in my journal, I'll be like,
oh my god, my hands start hurting.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
It's weird. I go like sometimes I'll like write in
all caps, and then I'll go into a cursive thing
and then I'm like I forgot my like style of writing. Yeah,
it's weird.
Speaker 4 (11:59):
I think you're a dangerous tell us.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Why well, if you watch enough date lines, it always
comes out of some ladies journal. She hands up sucking
herself by the journal, or she might end up showing
you who the killer is through the journal. But really
that that part never seems to pan out as much
as and she wrote in her journal. Yes, and I
(12:26):
got a Holly Hobby one when I was like ten,
I was so excited.
Speaker 4 (12:28):
It was like it was cat the Holly Hobby Diary,
head of key.
Speaker 2 (12:31):
My brothers broke into that like day four, and then
I got mocked for whatever I wrote when you're text
and yeah, and my dad was a lawyer. He said,
don't ever write anything down unless you're.
Speaker 4 (12:41):
Willing to be for that to be read and probably
smart out loud.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
To everyone because you just it's a paranoid thing. But
no on it though, it was like it did well,
the Holly Hobby thing. Unfortunately, like a tooth ding.
Speaker 4 (12:56):
With a gold top.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
I remember, yes, it just drops and opens right to
the page that you're talking about that person.
Speaker 4 (13:10):
Right, I'm talking about my siblings and I don't like school,
and my brother's a ship.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Yeah, like, that's not how do you write? What do
you do about writing your comedy? Do you write that down?
Speaker 4 (13:24):
Do you I've never read. I've never written a joke
about it. I have my joke books I call my
joke books, but it's just words.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Like if you've found it, you would think I might
be schizophrenic, because then I draw stuff and I'm like, oh,
here's a beagle drinking a beer. There'll be a whole
page of my drawing and then you'll flip it out
of it and it'll say amish roofs.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
It's just words.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
It's not our set, and it's just a picture book, the.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Pictures, and I'm bored, yeah on zooms and I'm like.
Speaker 3 (13:56):
Well that's perfect. Nobody could steal your jokes, right, it
will never don't.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Understand the words, so you won't know if I say, mom, target,
you won't know it's a whole bit, right. But I
already know that I'm basically telling true stories.
Speaker 4 (14:09):
So I'm just telling you the story. So writing it out.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
I don't even know how comics do that. That's interesting
things are to me that they sit and write.
Speaker 4 (14:19):
I had to do it for Comedy Central one hundred
years ago.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
When they had those Comedy Central half hours, you had
to put your own act in a script. The only
thing was helpful was I did find that I repeated
a couple things were unnecessary so I could tighten up.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
But anyin't worth all that.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
Yeah, it took me like two hours. Wait, so you,
I'm like, you just get up there and kind of
riff a little.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
Well, okay, Like I went to Target with my mom,
I won't do the joke, and she ended up just
giving me pills out of her person. I took them,
and then she didn't know what the pills were, and
I didn't know what was going to happen to me,
and I'm my god, damn it, mom, I was gonna
have a fun day. And then I ended up passing
out for like three hours, and then they'd wake me
up like every hour to make sure I was not dead.
(15:03):
So when I told my sister, I told my sister.
Speaker 4 (15:07):
The story, but I meant, I mean, it was all true.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
And then I don't think other people's parents have probably
done that, but I think they can relate to hav
an old crazy parent. So I just told what appened.
I just go up on stage and say what happened.
I tell the story.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
We love to have questions. I'm like, I can't really why.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
I said, I'm a pounding sinus headache, and I don't
know if it's allergies.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
We're in Target.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
We have this whole cart full of ship and she goes, oh,
here take this, and it was a pill bottle, but
she calls it her all stars. There's like everything in
there's from breast cancer pills to blood pressure.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Only she knows crazy.
Speaker 4 (15:57):
She's got she won a nerve, so I kind of
trust her.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Oh your mom was a nurse. Kind of sure, I
trust you.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
You're retired for quite some time. But so then she
gave it to me and I took it and then she.
Speaker 4 (16:11):
Goes, oh, what color was that? And I go hurt,
I don't know, mom, I didn't look. She goes, well,
why didn't you look?
Speaker 2 (16:20):
How?
Speaker 4 (16:20):
She's blaming me, why do you look at what color was?
Speaker 2 (16:22):
I go, cause you're not a guy I met at
a party.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
You're my mom, and I thought you knew what you
were doing. I go what She goes, hmmm, it's probably
your dad's blood pressure.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
So my blood pressure is gonna get super low. And
I'm just going to pass out, which is exactly.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
What it ended happening.
Speaker 4 (16:38):
Oh how are you, I don't know, thirty five? Okay,
like old enough? Yeah yeah, I mean yeah, that was what.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
You weren't twelve. I wasn't a kid, Okay, okay, I
pictured like no, you just mean like.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
No, no, at that age, she would have just given
us a shot of hot whiskey.
Speaker 4 (16:56):
She actually was with my sister. She's now a three
flying Florida.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
They actually said, is there a medical person on board?
Somebody who's having a medical emergency. My mom rang her bell.
All right, Mom, I get it. You were a nurse,
but you retired when you were fifty. You're eighty three,
so you were kind of a nurse in the Civil War.
Speaker 4 (17:18):
Let's just be honest. I couldn't believe.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
But she is a great but it's old timey. She's
just gonna give you a stick and say bite on
it and shoot whiskey. I hope you're ready for that
kind of nursing because she's not gonna be nice about
it either.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
It's just gonna be the person was having a seizure.
She's like, well, it's not a Grandma seizure. They'll be fine,
Like that kind of nursing.
Speaker 5 (17:38):
I find amazing old school yet and I wh it works.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
Yeah, fankly, my sister was so appalled. She's like, oh,
I cannot believe you rang that bell. Mom, You're eighty
three years old.
Speaker 4 (17:49):
She goes, I still know what I'm talking about. Thank you.
A choreologist guy also five minutes later rang a bell.
So my mom kind of got off that. Kate said,
I was so relieved.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Because there was somebody younger that I'm like, yeah, but Mom,
I'd still trust her. Their nursing was a school and
stuff was way more intense than what happens these days. Right,
I'm not dogging modern nurses. I'm just saying I know
what they did, know what these do, and.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Well, like that kind of nursing is like the foundation
for what people learn now.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
Yeah, I mean my mom knows still every drug every
They're like doctors, Yeah, they know, some of them know
more than doctors.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
I would trust my mom more than every nurse show
I've ever seen. Nurses What nurse show?
Speaker 3 (18:35):
What are you watching?
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Okay, go ahead, what else? Every nurse show I've ever seen,
everyone always loves the nurses, and the nurses catch the
fucked up thing that the doctor misses.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
Okay, yeah, cray anatomy.
Speaker 4 (18:51):
Maybe nurses wrote those shows.
Speaker 1 (18:52):
If I'm having a serious complication, I want Nurse Meredith
Gray or Christina Yang to help me, or their nurses,
but it's or Nurse Jackie. I don't want any Falco
to come and save me.
Speaker 4 (19:08):
What about Vicky Madighan, she'll come.
Speaker 1 (19:10):
I don't know who that is, but mom, mom, Hello, Sorry, yeah, yeah,
I don't know. I'd be the worst nurse ever.
Speaker 3 (19:24):
I'd be very compassionate, but I would kill so many people.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
I think accidentally ever accidentally killed somebody.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
No, my mom's super good at like math and science
her bedside That's why grandmother My bedside manners were like shine.
Speaker 3 (19:41):
But it's the math and then that would kill people.
Speaker 1 (19:43):
Yeah, the science readers.
Speaker 4 (19:48):
And be like no, I don't do that crazy foreign math.
What is that bullshit on?
Speaker 1 (19:53):
Yeah, I don't understand. I don't understand how their brain
absorbs all that information. Like she still all the pills.
That's crazy.
Speaker 4 (20:02):
She even knows pills that don't exist.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
Because one time I was in their closet, my dad
wanted me to go find a certain golf shirt of his.
Speaker 4 (20:08):
I go no problem.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
I go in there and I move the shirts and
there's all these pills she has hoarded, and I read
the one that says Darvasset, I go, mom, what's up
with the thousand darvas sets back there? Well, best pain medication,
I wrote, it's bullshit that pills expire, and if I
get something horrible, I want to make sure that me
and your dad are set.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
So she had hoarded.
Speaker 2 (20:28):
Over the years, and there was this I'm like, so
I googled it, Darvasset, it's a wicked painkiller.
Speaker 1 (20:34):
She's right, Wow, yeah, I wonder why they just continued it.
Speaker 2 (20:38):
I well, there's probably a very good reason. And Vicky
Madigan doesn't give a shit.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
Okay, great, but I also trust her.
Speaker 5 (20:46):
But in the world, any kind of apocalypse happens like
she's got she's got it, like anyone hurts themselves.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
Yeah, injured pain pills probably don't expire. Something I'm thinking
now Vicky Madigan's ted talk.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
I mean, why what they expider expider expire.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
I don't know. I don't know. I think we're getting
into territory that we don't Oh yeah, this is we
can't we can't handle what we just brought up. None
of us are good at.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Side to go?
Speaker 4 (21:14):
Why would a pill?
Speaker 1 (21:16):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (21:17):
I think what I think?
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Lies? Lies? Lies?
Speaker 4 (21:22):
Oh you just think it's all lies. Well, I have
a doctor friend. I should text he she we should.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
I have a doctor friend too, But also who cares?
Speaker 1 (21:29):
I just I would love to know if pills expire,
like what.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
Happens to it? It's still the safe shape of the pills.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
It's still so I know. That's what I don't like. Yeah,
it's in powder for how long?
Speaker 4 (21:41):
Here's one? This will sound like I know what I'm
talking about, and I don't.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
Okay, but how long do the neutrons and protons and Adams?
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Baby?
Speaker 4 (21:49):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Yeah, yeah, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead?
Speaker 4 (21:51):
What is there? Is it a year? Is it's seven years?
Is it?
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Protons and neutrons? Seven years?
Speaker 3 (21:59):
I just what's proton like?
Speaker 1 (22:01):
Seven years?
Speaker 5 (22:01):
And neutrons about like six six and a half and
Adam Adams about four we made neutrons neutrons or at
least it is a cell and atom is?
Speaker 1 (22:19):
Yeah? Speak up if you know more information than us.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
I flung science every year, and I'm like, why is
no one understanding that?
Speaker 4 (22:32):
I don't get it?
Speaker 1 (22:33):
I don't get it?
Speaker 4 (22:34):
Why do I have to keep doing it? We're made
up of lots of cells cells, but are those atoms?
Speaker 3 (22:39):
There's atoms inside inside the cells.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
And good thing we have computer phones to tell us
an atam is.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
There's more.
Speaker 1 (22:52):
There's definitely more cells. There are atoms as next week
we're going to have a scientist on to clear all
this atom made up. Humans, like matter, are made up
of atoms. Our bodies are composed of tiny particles called atoms,
which combine to form molecules and ultimately build the cells
(23:12):
and tissues that makes us up.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
What's in an atom?
Speaker 1 (23:16):
Pro p? So what do you mean expire? If they expire?
Do we expire? Yes? Yes? So that seven years is
not enough? Okay, so what are we even talking about?
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (23:34):
I'm still medication.
Speaker 1 (23:38):
What was Yeah, I'm here right now.
Speaker 4 (23:45):
Diversion version.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
It sounds like a sci fi show on Apple. Yeah,
came out some of that.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
Real name is the ad for sky Rizzy. I don't
even know what it is, but I don't want to
take it. Everybody's having so much fun.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Jumper, you got rise to this guy, Kathleen.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
Is that Tiffany on your shirt?
Speaker 4 (24:03):
No, it's Stevie Tiffany.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
Alone.
Speaker 4 (24:09):
Now he's out on the road. By the way, she is,
so is she. Stevie's always on the road.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
I know, having like a big Trier or last year.
Speaker 4 (24:20):
Well, sometimes she goes with Billy Joel. I'm not having
any of that.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
With Billy Joel.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
It was okay, yeah, but she's gonna go first because
he's probably mister.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
If it's me and some other comic, I always volunteer
to go first, first, one done, first, one of the bar.
Speaker 4 (24:37):
I don't have the ego. I have the headline who cares?
Speaker 1 (24:42):
But I don't want to love that.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
I love that him. Yeah, I just want to see Stevie.
He's fine, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
But I don't dislike it. Well, I didn't like when
he fell in love with Christy Briekley.
Speaker 4 (24:52):
He did that whole album was so cheesy.
Speaker 2 (24:54):
She's up down downtown. Well, I'm like, like him, what
happened to the Stranger guy? That album was great And
now you're all weird and in love with this lady
and it's terrible.
Speaker 5 (25:07):
I forgot he was married to Christie Brinkley, like hot, hot,
hot Christian Yeah, I know, and then.
Speaker 4 (25:13):
They had do they have babies? Do they have kids together?
She looks like him.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
She looks like him.
Speaker 4 (25:17):
Yeah, she is pretty, it's just different. It would be
hard I think if your mother is like a supermodel
person in the world. Yeah, and then you look like
your day Oh okay, sleep, he's got yeah, he's got
puppy guys.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Okay, yeah, great things. I don't know anything about. So
you've seen c or like her concert live?
Speaker 4 (25:40):
Yeah, many times, like one hundred times. I'm not like
a super crazy like once a year. But she's not
on the road for I don't know, thirty years.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
So oh, yes, I did accidentally meet her. I did
not want to meet her. I don't want to ever
meet people that I think are awesome because yeah terrible right. Well, yeah,
but I did the Tonight Show once, and well I
have done the Ty Show a bunch, so Jay knows.
I'm friends with Jay.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
It's done a bunch, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (26:09):
More than any other woman, if you I bet, I bet,
I think that was my record.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
What Yeah, So anyway with jay Leto like twenty five times.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
She's just sitting over here on our big friend.
Speaker 4 (26:18):
Shut up.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
It's really want in the rotation anyway. So my friend
Bob booked all lot of the people and he goes,
your girlfriend Stevie is going to be doing the Time show.
Speaker 4 (26:31):
It was like a Tuesday. He goes. I go, I'm
coming out.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
I want to see but I don't want to sit
in the audience. I just want to stand on the
side with you. So I did and she was great.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
And then Leno saw me at the end and he goes, hey,
what are you doing up here? I go, nothing, I
just came to get some papers from Bob. Bob goes, no, she.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
Loves Stevie n eggs and she came to see Stephen.
Speaker 4 (26:50):
It's like, oh, Bob God.
Speaker 2 (26:51):
Well.
Speaker 4 (26:52):
Then Jay's like, where does she get a picture with her?
Speaker 2 (26:54):
And he goes and grabs her and I'm like, no,
I don't want any of this.
Speaker 4 (26:58):
What am I going to say that This lady's never Yeah,
Landslide's awesome.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
You'd have to pick a weird song where it would
actually pique her interest. And after the glitter Phades was
super great and didn't get.
Speaker 4 (27:10):
Enough attention, Well, I'm not gonna do that. Yeah, and
she just went hello and I'm like hello.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
And then the photographer took this picture and she looks
perfect because she knows how to instantly she knows how
to pose.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
And I'm like, I'm only like, yeah, people have ever
seen it. I'll take a picture of the picture and
send it.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
To you please.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
And I'm like thirty, so I look super young and
she must have been fifty and.
Speaker 4 (27:40):
She looks great.
Speaker 1 (27:41):
Then yeah, I mean, she looks great. Now.
Speaker 4 (27:43):
I don't want to meet those people.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
But at least it was a good experience. Even though
she ran away, it was fast.
Speaker 4 (27:50):
I just ran away, let her go. She doesn't want to.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
I didn't feel as dumb though, because Jay goes that
their young Comedia is very funny. I friend of mine, like,
it wasn't like I was a psycho. At least there
was a conduit there.
Speaker 4 (28:02):
But also, what, I don't need a picture.
Speaker 3 (28:08):
You had, you had.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
Had your moment. It's like my Dave girl story. I
don't know.
Speaker 5 (28:13):
I met Dave Grol and it was really weird and
that yeah, it was too weird because he was It
was the closest.
Speaker 3 (28:19):
I'll ever get to fucking uh like, no, he's cool.
Speaker 5 (28:25):
I don't really know. I didn't even talk to him.
I just said that we were both eating burger and
I said good burger, and he said, m that's it, and.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
That's it. But I had my moment.
Speaker 5 (28:39):
It was the closest I'll ever get to, uh, Kirk
Obain because I love Nirvana. That's why, Like when I
saw him, I was like, this is the closest I'll
ever get to Kirk Cobain.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
Well, yeah, I was gonna say Courtney right right or yeah,
but it's also it's also Dave girl.
Speaker 3 (28:57):
And he's just he's cool.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
Yeah, he's just cool. I shouldn't be allowed to be around.
There's some people, there's celebrities. Yeah, and I say the
weirdest shit.
Speaker 4 (29:07):
Do you want to know what my friend, this is
the craziest shit I've ever heard.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
And this is a normal friend of mine most of
the time normal, I guess I could say, Well, I'll
say her name.
Speaker 4 (29:17):
I'll make up a name.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
Okay, yeah, there you go, There you go. We can
always edit anything else. We'll call Susan Sarandon, We'll call her.
Speaker 4 (29:24):
Yeah, we'll put it on a different celebrity.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Jessica. Well, well I would die.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
So my friend let's say Mary, Okay, Mary and her
friend and they're from southern Missouri in the boot heel,
so they are we do classify them as a little
Craig Cray.
Speaker 4 (29:39):
They're a little off.
Speaker 2 (29:40):
Little Arkansas e nutty when they want to be. She's
she is enamored, obsessed with Winona Judd. So back like
in the nineties before we really had cell phones and
all that.
Speaker 4 (29:51):
They drove from Missouri down here, went to the courthouse
in Franklin, Tennessee. She goes, I just went to the
porhouse and said, I'm friends with Winona Judd.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
But my directions got all wet when I spilled the
slurpe on him, and cause you tell me how, And
the lady at the courthouse drew a map to drive
to the Jude's house.
Speaker 5 (30:13):
This is what she believes her she and my slurpee
got all over the direction.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
I wrote direction, but I was drinking yet a cherry.
Speaker 4 (30:31):
So they drive, heard her friend, they drive to the property. Yeah,
probably they drive to the property.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
And no, absolutely not.
Speaker 4 (30:42):
And guess who answers Ashley? Damn it, it's not why
if they don't care about Ashley.
Speaker 5 (30:49):
They're obsessed with Lena, beautiful, beautiful Ashley, especially in the
eighties or nineties like she was.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
They can't give me her book at fundraiser things It
was in the gift bag, and I'm like, I guess
I should read it.
Speaker 4 (31:03):
Clearly, Jesus wants me to have it.
Speaker 2 (31:05):
I've been given it times clearly, so and.
Speaker 4 (31:08):
Then I tried to read it and I'm like, huh, yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
What did they do? What did they do recently a book?
Speaker 4 (31:15):
No, probably ten years ago?
Speaker 3 (31:17):
What did they do? Ashley opened the door, and.
Speaker 4 (31:20):
Well, she was very nice and told them wen Ona
went home, you know, just like a regular Joe blow.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
And they were like, well damn and Dyda had no
interest in hanging out with Mama jud or Ashley.
Speaker 4 (31:34):
They're all out there on the property somewhere, bumping.
Speaker 1 (31:36):
Around, and so.
Speaker 4 (31:39):
Yeah, well we know how to get here.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
That is no security because nobody else would be that psycho.
Speaker 4 (31:47):
So I said to my friend to do that.
Speaker 2 (31:49):
So then when they let you, well nowadays, yeah, I'm
saying back then, nobody would thought to go to city hall.
But my friend was a reporter for a living, like
the news reporter stuff, so she knew how to get
people's addresses.
Speaker 5 (32:02):
And also she's not like a stalker. Okay, I spoke
to you sooner.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
But she has a vision and she's a determined person
that she's gonna sit there and have.
Speaker 4 (32:14):
A beer with Winona Judge. Come tell her, I goddamn water?
Speaker 1 (32:17):
Has she no? Yeah? Yeah, the love me. She's gotta
love me.
Speaker 5 (32:27):
I'm gonna show up with the six pack and we're
just gonna shoot the sheep.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
She's gonna love me. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
But you know what, if there was anybody on earth
ACCAPLI ship, I'd say it's my friend.
Speaker 4 (32:38):
Like she could actually do it, and that's what keeps
her going.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Unfortunately, the wow, the confidence delusion, the confidence was she
just a normal person.
Speaker 4 (32:49):
Why wouldn't she want to have a beer if she's bored? Well,
I don't know, I guess. And then I started thinking,
I don't know. I mean I've had beers with random
fans just because I was bored.
Speaker 1 (33:02):
That's a timing thing. They just Yeah, you didn't feel
like a weird vibe from them, that they were normal.
Speaker 3 (33:11):
That's like like and then and then is like how'd
you find where?
Speaker 1 (33:15):
How'd you find you?
Speaker 4 (33:16):
Well, speak to Cindy at City Hall because she's drawn.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
My god, I wonder is that the same house that
they have been in for Yeah, it's all the same. Wow.
So Mary just.
Speaker 4 (33:30):
Knows, she knows no, I'm sure there's some weird gate.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
But first because of Mary's people, Like.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
When they left the deal, Ashley said, nobody's home, blah blah.
Speaker 4 (33:41):
They get in the car, they see a convertible, uh,
top down, red hair and it's Winona going that way.
They missed her. Damn it by like fifteen minutes.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
Did she ever get to meet her?
Speaker 4 (33:54):
She has done the meet and greets where you pay
for that? I said to her, And sad, you are
at so many shows.
Speaker 1 (34:02):
Your picture is female.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
Little picture is involved in the security meeting. You are
the photo like we have to have a little security meeting.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
You're at so many shows.
Speaker 4 (34:12):
That you're in the meet and Greek. We have a
picture and you're probably this one will do anything.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
Yeah, but watch out for this one. You keep good company.
I'll say that I just learned that about you. You
keep great company. You're friends with Mary, Yes, but I
believe you keep them Mary's around. I keep Yeah, the
black happens.
Speaker 4 (34:35):
It's just crazy Mary. He will tell you this story
as if it's totally totally I'm like, oh my god.
If I had done that, I will only tell like
two people on Earth.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
I would have anxiety about it. Oh from the start,
Like god damn it, I can't believe. I. You know,
when there's like the certain things that just stay with
you forever that like randomly you'll just like wake up
from an app and be like, oh my god, I can't.
Speaker 5 (34:58):
Believe Yours are my favorite kind of people that have
like that your awareness, Like that's wrong, Like you don't
go and do something like that.
Speaker 1 (35:06):
I love just like.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
Me.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
I want to sit down and talk to Mary. Yeah.
I don't even know what other stories about her.
Speaker 4 (35:17):
I don't know. Yeah, I think she drinks wine. I
mean I I follow her on Instagram and all that. Yeah,
she seems like she drinks. She's so weird to say
about somebody.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
No, there's a guy there, Yeah, there's a She.
Speaker 4 (35:31):
Seems more of a drinker than a weedy. I always
put them in a caddy.
Speaker 5 (35:34):
You're either like a pill popper person or yeah, pill popper,
psychedelic kind of person.
Speaker 3 (35:40):
Yeah, the psychedelic kind of person.
Speaker 4 (35:42):
The mushroom. Yeah, they're even different than the weed people, definitely. Yeah.
The comedians always used to be instantly divided, Like at
the Improved lay Well, we didn't have anything gainst one another.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
It's just like you're the sowner, You're gonna be outside smoking, yeah,
and then I'm a drinker.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
I'm going to be inside.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
And some of us were sig smokers too, So I
got to know both crowds because I'm out with the stoners,
but I'm just smoking cigs.
Speaker 4 (36:04):
And then i'd.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Coinside with my drinkers. But the drinkers are drinkers. We
hardly ever like form lifelong friendships.
Speaker 4 (36:13):
The drink drinkers and drinkers, the drinkers and the weirders
the drinks, because they're different.
Speaker 1 (36:18):
Running you're down, how are we ever gonna?
Speaker 3 (36:21):
I don't know how people get really high and get
on stage until.
Speaker 1 (36:24):
A lot you don't either, you get and I'd be
like shaking and weird.
Speaker 2 (36:32):
Well maybe not that takes like. I'm never nervous going
on stage. I just don't ever well at a corporate gig.
Always at a corporate gig, because I feel like they're
paying me a lot of money and odds are it's
not going to go well.
Speaker 4 (36:44):
Well, sometimes it does.
Speaker 2 (36:46):
It's like Russian roulette. YEA four shows are fine, but
one the bullets in there and it's terrible. And then
my Midwest off feels guilty taking the money because I
didn't really do that good.
Speaker 1 (36:56):
You take that money, but.
Speaker 4 (37:00):
I just don't really don't try not to do them
anymore possible.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
But I would maybe have like, but then I think, Okay,
if I'm nervous with this corp of gig, maybe well
I'm just a horrible weed person.
Speaker 4 (37:10):
But let's say I decided four beers. Yeah, then I
would feel like I'm not really in charge of what
I'm doing here. Yeah, I don't. The stoner people a
whole joint. Josh Blue will tell you it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
I just go, yeah, how I think it's the equivalent
of if you feel better and more relaxed having two
beers before you go on stage, and you're like I'm
like quick, I'm like, I'm locked in, tuned in. I
feel like it's the equivalent of people that smoke really
like a lot of weed before they go on stage.
I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. I'm
(37:45):
just no, no, no, that's right, checks out, it checks out.
Speaker 4 (37:47):
It's like the equivalent of that or now I have
a question going backwards, okay, because I.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Know what I when I when you get up, you
like go to the gym, and all that. When I
get up, I instantly read all the news, whether it's Twitter, Instagram,
all of this.
Speaker 4 (38:03):
What do you do when you wake up? What do
you do in the morning?
Speaker 1 (38:07):
If I do you?
Speaker 4 (38:08):
If you don't turn on the TV or you do
turn I don't turn this, you don't turn no music?
Speaker 1 (38:14):
Yes I will. I get up the dogs and I
have like a minute to like say hi, it's every
morning I wake up. Their little heads are like, oh cool,
you're awake, and I'm like, I'm awake.
Speaker 4 (38:29):
Are they in the bed?
Speaker 1 (38:30):
In the bed?
Speaker 4 (38:31):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (38:31):
And we have a little moment little time. We immediately
go for like a twenty minute walk. We come back in.
I give them bones. If you haven't had coffee or anything, no,
I put them in there. That's a lot. That's a
lot before a cup of coffee. Oh I have drinking
coffee coffee right, boom boom, Yeah I'm not drinking a lot.
(38:53):
That's true.
Speaker 4 (38:54):
Well right, yeah, it's had your druthers though.
Speaker 1 (38:57):
Yeah. I usually do like a protein shake with coffee
in it immediately. Yeah, I don't even know how to
make one so good. And then I ask Alexa to
play meditation music and I light an incense. And then
if I have to post something, I post it. If
I have to do like, it's whatever. I Sometimes I
wake up and I like start vacuuming. Sometimes I'm like,
(39:18):
oh I got it clean, and I just like have
a lot of energy and I just start cleaning the house.
Oh yeah, I don't know. Okay, what news forum should
we start following? Apple?
Speaker 4 (39:30):
Is?
Speaker 1 (39:30):
What do we do? What Twitter is gonna? Black Twitter?
Speaker 2 (39:34):
No, okay, no, Blackwater is my favorite.
Speaker 1 (39:40):
I think you're the one who told me about black Twitter.
Speaker 4 (39:43):
Because when when there's a black oh you are.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
That's why I know it too separately.
Speaker 4 (39:47):
It's my favorite thing. You're telling you. It's the best
when when a black person goes wrong or.
Speaker 2 (39:55):
Does something questionable the black community and they have their
own thing. It's within Twitter, but it's hashtag black Twitter.
It's the funniest shit I've ever read.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
And so somebody has to fuck up and then they
go ham on them.
Speaker 4 (40:08):
Well like let's say yeah. Then they'll be like, well,
well here's a good example. This is a better example.
Speaker 2 (40:18):
So I need a baker who's you know the singer
the RNBCU she canceled the concert in Atlanta, Like it's
seven o'clock.
Speaker 4 (40:27):
And the show was supposed to start at eight. Oh
so black But here's what I loved about.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
But but isn't she eighty years old? Though, Anita Baker.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
She's sixty four. I'm not eighty.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
Is that what you won't? Baby?
Speaker 4 (40:41):
I got it.
Speaker 1 (40:42):
That's Athatha and she is dead.
Speaker 4 (40:46):
She's dead.
Speaker 3 (40:51):
Yeah, breaking news Twitter, breaking news on black Twitter.
Speaker 4 (40:55):
Put that on there.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
Y'all know that Aretha Franklin, Jesus.
Speaker 4 (41:02):
White lady chiming in is the reason Franklin alive.
Speaker 1 (41:05):
We're dead. Her cells are gone, Adam Adam's expired.
Speaker 2 (41:15):
So Anita cancels their concert, right, they'll last minute and
it's the day, it's a Saturday before Mother's Day. Well,
black Twitter, I knew it was gonna go crazy because
there's eighteen thousand people down at the State Farm Arena
or whatever it is in Atlanta and there in the shows, well,
half of black Twitter.
Speaker 4 (41:32):
Was like, this is some bullshit, motherfucker.
Speaker 1 (41:34):
How you do? What do you wait here?
Speaker 4 (41:36):
We'll hear aunty Na I got time for this kind
of bullshit.
Speaker 2 (41:40):
Then the other half, the other half though, was like,
you don't know, you need to be nice to Auntie Nanna.
Speaker 4 (41:46):
Something tragic may have happened, which I'm with that crowd.
You don't know till you know. It does suck. You
drove down there, it does suck.
Speaker 5 (41:55):
Worse things have happened, but like an hour before, something
seems like something seemed like something happens.
Speaker 4 (42:01):
May but she has a track, her hered sometimes of
doing things.
Speaker 1 (42:06):
Oh this is her thing.
Speaker 4 (42:07):
Well it's not necessarily thing, it just has happened. There's
a fight with baby Face. I follow off. She had
a fight with baby Face. Yeah, and guess who don't
win on that one? Babyface? Yeah no, no, no, no, no,
not on black Twitter. They ain't having it.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
Antie nanay Ancyne wins baby Face.
Speaker 4 (42:26):
Can you take two steps back, two step back, little man?
Speaker 2 (42:30):
Yeah yeah, Auntie Nana got this one. But anyway, that's
my favorite. Where were Where were I getting what happened? Well,
I gotta say I saw Anita in Atlanta. He went
too long, he did too much time, and you can't
do that as the opener. Oh he was thinking he's
(42:50):
a co headliner and no, no, no, no, no went
over say Anita Baker and baby Face. It said Anita
Baker with special guests. That means you're the opening act.
Speaker 4 (43:02):
Sure, and he was not by a million. No, I
can't say I wasn't having fun.
Speaker 2 (43:07):
He did produce every song in the nineties baby face,
and then shagged them all.
Speaker 4 (43:12):
It was like one of the big boxers blew up
of nineties awesome songs. So we're all having a good time.
But I also understand if it's her and I'm staying
that stage going what the fuck we Yeah? I told
him to do forty five, we're in an hour ten?
Speaker 3 (43:27):
Yeah, oh shit, oh yeah, yeah, Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (43:30):
Have you ever had an opener do that to you?
Speaker 5 (43:32):
No?
Speaker 1 (43:33):
Oh, that's good.
Speaker 4 (43:33):
They I don't think, No, I don't.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
I think the people that I hire, well, I mean
randomly in clubs back in the day, when I didn't
know who the opener was, there were ones that went
off the rails.
Speaker 4 (43:43):
But I'm like, that is not my monkey, not my circus.
The club needs to.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
Work on that ship.
Speaker 4 (43:49):
Where'd you get this guy?
Speaker 2 (43:52):
You're gonna let this go on whole week. I mean,
there's a middle act after that guy. So I'm free
and clear.
Speaker 4 (43:58):
As long as the middle is not crazy, I don't
even have to worry about that train wreck. I get
to enjoy it for the back of the room, but
not my monkey mony.
Speaker 1 (44:08):
I just want to know, like all the crazy shit,
Like the comedy world is just.
Speaker 3 (44:14):
So well, you're learning so much more about it now
from a j yeah, but also like there's just a.
Speaker 4 (44:21):
Lot of rejects. There's very few normal people.
Speaker 3 (44:23):
I'm learning that, yeah, yeah, what comedians.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
And we don't speak to one another like corporate people
at all.
Speaker 2 (44:31):
Like I don't even speak to an agent like that,
Like I didn't like human resources and stuff doesn't exist
within our world and nothing nothing exists, like I know
there's no HR, Like I will write back to an agent,
what the fuck none of this was said before.
Speaker 4 (44:47):
I can't even believe it.
Speaker 2 (44:49):
I'm gonna go have a beers call me later a
bullshit yeah, And then like people that have.
Speaker 4 (44:54):
Corporate jobs, the email reads bumping this to the top
of your email.
Speaker 2 (44:59):
Moment forward, I wish you would tell me that, but
we don't speak like you are probably the.
Speaker 1 (45:07):
Yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 2 (45:08):
And I think my thinks I'm a super nice person
because I don't really yell or type in all caps
or bitch compared to I think there's some real problems
out there.
Speaker 1 (45:21):
I think there's a lot of shitty people that people
think are great.
Speaker 5 (45:24):
But also I think that's just that's that's everything That'dstryeah.
Speaker 1 (45:29):
Yeah, but you like want to love comedians, Yeah, that's
you really want to love you being mister happy clown.
Speaker 4 (45:35):
You're presenting yourself as miss Eviss, happy clown and funny clown,
and then off stage you're this monster that if let's
say Marilyn Manson is a monster, well he's a monster
on stage. He's always a monster.
Speaker 2 (45:50):
So it's not like, oh, I thought you were a funny,
sort nice, an everyday guy.
Speaker 4 (45:56):
Yeah, you're clearly bizarre, right you present your car, right,
it's bizarre. Right.
Speaker 5 (46:02):
And now, like you said, because of social media and everything,
it's so easy to find out who you are, right,
Like you can you can be all shiny over here,
and then there's videos of you being a total jerk
off like everybody, your fans or whatever.
Speaker 1 (46:15):
Yeah, they'll all.
Speaker 4 (46:16):
Find out too. Sometimes it takes years and years and years.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
There's a few people that all of us were waiting,
when will the world not buy this bullshit anymore? Yeah?
And then that it's something stupid, it's something small that
just boom and exposes.
Speaker 3 (46:31):
Well, because the truth will always reveal itself.
Speaker 1 (46:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (46:35):
Yeah, but sometimes it takes too much, sometimes while, but
it usually usually always does that.
Speaker 2 (46:41):
Yes, that's why complaint with karma when people go, well, karma,
it'll come around.
Speaker 4 (46:46):
It needs in my lifetime.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
I don't like it. Well years, I don't care anymore.
Speaker 4 (46:57):
Wait, how's that karma wheel? How do we kick it?
Like hicked the wheel?
Speaker 2 (47:00):
Yeah, to make a confront, because how many good years
do those people get?
Speaker 3 (47:04):
I know, how much money have they made being look
at Oj?
Speaker 4 (47:09):
How many years do we all believe he was the god?
Speaker 2 (47:12):
I'm older than you guys, but I remember the Hurts
commercials and he's so handsome and he's funny, and you know,
I didn't know he was going home and beating people up, Like, oh,
you guys.
Speaker 1 (47:21):
Think he killed them?
Speaker 2 (47:23):
What?
Speaker 4 (47:27):
No?
Speaker 1 (47:27):
I didn't until I read his book.
Speaker 4 (47:29):
Yeah, and then I was like, oh my god, did
he do it? No?
Speaker 1 (47:34):
I think everyone knew that OJ did it. And I
don't think anyone cared when he died. I think that
people are like, oh, yeah, nobody cares.
Speaker 4 (47:42):
Oh no, you didn't know this, he.
Speaker 1 (47:46):
Marik.
Speaker 4 (47:46):
We have so much breaking news, you know, breaking news,
breaking news, O J Simpson died.
Speaker 2 (47:51):
O J.
Speaker 1 (47:51):
Simpson died in Florida. Twitter. Yeah, and nobody cares. Yeah.
I knew that. Yeah, I knew that in jail. Right,
he died in jail.
Speaker 3 (48:04):
No, no, no, he got out.
Speaker 1 (48:12):
Twitter. He got out of jail, had a I know,
do you need another beer?
Speaker 4 (48:18):
P Yeah, I do.
Speaker 3 (48:20):
He got out of jail.
Speaker 1 (48:22):
He got out of jail. His time crazy or he
had some sickness.
Speaker 4 (48:28):
Well he did, yes, that's how he died. But he
got out of jail before he had sickness.
Speaker 3 (48:32):
He had just done his time, which was not enough time.
Speaker 4 (48:36):
He did.
Speaker 2 (48:37):
He got put in jail for stealing the trophy back.
He never got convicted for murdering people.
Speaker 1 (48:43):
Nicole.
Speaker 4 (48:44):
Oh, that's a whole segment. Mar I didn't hear about steal.
So in Las Vegas they were reselling this totally boring,
but they were recent No.
Speaker 1 (48:55):
Okay, so O J got free and clear of of
Asian or something. I remember that back in the nineties.
He was free, free, cleare.
Speaker 4 (49:03):
So what he was doing to make money was doing
because you can charge cash like sign and stuff at
a public thing like come meet OJ and a meet
and greet. Basically okay and he'll sign shit for you
for twenty bucks whatever.
Speaker 2 (49:16):
So that's how he was making money that really the
government can't track because if it's cash, you don't know
how many people are there black right, But he starts
to get into the memorabilia world. OJ does like, meaning, hey,
there's an auction of a Heisman trophy all this crap.
Speaker 4 (49:31):
If you've ever seen there have been date lines about it,
like somebody kills somebody over sports memorabilia. He's now part
of that genre. Okay, Well, there's these guys.
Speaker 2 (49:39):
In Vegas in a downtown casino hotel. So they're not
even on the main drag. They're downtown, which already says
he they.
Speaker 4 (49:48):
They a guy calls OJ and says they have your this, this, this.
Speaker 2 (49:53):
And this like Heisman trophy all is and he's like, well,
I want my ship back. So he got these thuggy
guys to go with them.
Speaker 4 (49:59):
But they were armed.
Speaker 2 (50:01):
Now, OJ says he didn't know they were armed, but
they walked in and guns started coming out and said
give us the shit back or you're not leaving.
Speaker 4 (50:08):
This hotel room.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
That right there is technically kidnapping. You're holding an adult
against their will with a firearm and he was guilty
of that.
Speaker 3 (50:15):
And then he got coming.
Speaker 4 (50:17):
He got like six year sentences six alor he served
six yeah, for that incident in Vegas. And then he
was released and then he went to Florida, Okay.
Speaker 1 (50:27):
And then he got sick. And then he released a
video saying, you know, I'm feeling really good. I'm feeling
so much better. I think I'm gonna be I can't
wait to just get back at it.
Speaker 4 (50:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (50:38):
And then and then he died the next day.
Speaker 4 (50:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (50:40):
And then he died the next day and then karma.
Speaker 1 (50:44):
Thank you guys so much for tuning in to The
Touchup Podcast. Please follow us on Instagram at the touch
Up Podcast, follow us on TikTok at the touch Up.
If you have any beauty questions, give us a ring
six one, five, three, three, eight five to nine by
three See you later by
I get a little touch up. Hi am teren Mari.
And you're listening to we hope you're picking up what
we're putting down.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
You know, I was reading about the Haarkles, Megan and
Harry and they're a fucking podcast and they.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
The Prince, the Prince, the Prince of the Markle.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Your hat's sitting a little.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
High, buddy, Oh is it? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (00:30):
Yeah, that's better. He looks like a little drunken counts
a night.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Wonderful, wonderful.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Spotify gave them twenty extra million dollars, extra extra because
the the company that had to take over the podcast
because they couldn't do it because they're stupid. And I thought,
this is how podcast studio. Where's the twenty million.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Going in twenty Yeah, they're just pocketing it.
Speaker 4 (01:06):
It says we have less than this and it works.
Speaker 5 (01:08):
Fine, So they're pocketing it's I guess that's how much
they're getting.
Speaker 4 (01:12):
That was just bonus extra money.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
I didn't even know they had a podcast.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
They don't, that's what's like.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Okay, So that Spotify gave them one hundred million dollars
and they were supposed to they they produced over all
this time only I think eight to twelve episodes and
it's just Megan talk.
Speaker 4 (01:30):
Harry's not involved.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
It's just Megan interviewing like Serena Williams. But then they
said she didn't even do some of the interviews. They
just put her in the thing. Anyway, it didn't work.
Spotify was like they weren't getting any content, so they
hired a company to take over.
Speaker 4 (01:45):
But they gave those people. Those people were like, well,
we're gonna need twenty million to fix it. What look
around us, like, this is all you need. I don't
understand where the twenty million? Is it? The green room?
Speaker 2 (01:58):
No, like they did Kelly Carson Show was the most
awesome thing ever.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
So if you're waiting, you're the guest of archetype. I
think that's what I call it. I don't know if
it's arch type or.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Arch podcast or archetype, archetype, archie type.
Speaker 4 (02:15):
Another mistake.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Yeah, I want to know so about that.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Their company and their podcast was called oh oh, I
don't know.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
It's probably for their their time.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
I think it's because it's them.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
It's them, what do you mean.
Speaker 5 (02:29):
I think it's just because it's like they were like me,
they yeah, oh, they just.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
Gave it the company said it though the fix it company,
because nothing was getting done from these morons, and they
were like, okay, Spotify hired a company to go in
and basically crack the whip and let's go.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
Let's go.
Speaker 4 (02:46):
And those people said we need twenty million. But I'm like, wow,
every podcast I do, of all my friends and stuff.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Is just slow budget. Nothing's over ten ten grands. No, nothing.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
That board from Guitar Center. Yeah, if you wait till
that Christmas, well, yeah, try, that's right.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
They're happy to see you a good Yeah, the most records.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Yeah, the cameras are the most expensive, right, but even
like somebody like Alex Cooper, her cameras are maybe I
don't know, six seven eight grand each, right, that's a
lot of that's a lot of money, it is, but
it's not twenty million dollars.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
It's not twenty million dollars.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
But her contract is insane. I'm sure. I don't or
like Joe Rogan, he probably.
Speaker 4 (03:34):
I don't know what these people works.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
For their time. It's for them to keep going. I
have no idea.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
I think it's because of the royals.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Oh, because they're royales.
Speaker 5 (03:42):
You quit be a royal, you're still you're still technically
a royale though, I mean it's like royale in your blood.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
He is, she's not, but he's still.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
You can am I missing? Did they get divorced? No?
Speaker 3 (03:56):
No, they they stepped down from being royal whitman royal.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
Do you remember a thing that gave them a.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
Racist because somebody was, uh, looked at her weird?
Speaker 4 (04:08):
Well this is what I thought too. Oh my god,
a castle full of.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Am I getting information wrong over there?
Speaker 4 (04:15):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (04:15):
Jody google it? Will you produce this? There's too much information.
Speaker 3 (04:19):
That's like the weirdest reason to like, de Throw.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
Was mad at somebody, and she's mad that a castle
full of old, wise British people might be racist.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
Shocking for sure. I can't belive you Paula Dean used
the end words. Really, you can't. I totally think she'd
dos it every five minutes.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
And I can taste the racism in her food. It's
in the midder, in the old it's racist. Yeah, it's
a little anti, but you know that's where like semi, if.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
You're Megan, look, you just agreed to marry into this.
You've seen them on television. Does Prince Charles look like
a get around town kind of guy.
Speaker 4 (05:14):
No, I mean maybe not super duper uptight British white.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
And I wonder like has he ever tried Indian food? Like,
we don't know these things about him. We don't know
anything about him.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Know, he's an earth guy. He was to save the
planet guy before everybody else was. He's all about organic
food and.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, cool, great, we'll get on that.
Speaker 4 (05:37):
Yeah, he did what his father would deem soft things
code for this kid might be gay. That's what his father.
I didn't say that sauce.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
No, not that kind of sung like like he was
a terrible athlete and he just he didn't want to
do what he things things. And he said to one
of these schools that you got to be a human
and wasn't a he man.
Speaker 4 (06:06):
Yeah, he wanted a garden.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Well we have to have a gay prince. You too
about your prince? You might be gay?
Speaker 4 (06:13):
Well he could not.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
No, No, they're not married to somebody.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
There's not.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
In in the royal family royalty personally, Google, okay, gay
royalty person I don't know gay royalty exist.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
I mean, we we all know it exists in the
drag drag industry in.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
A super liberal country like a super progressive nation, like
who still has royalty?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Though it's like Sweden Denmark?
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Right there we go? What where's Parma? Where's Pharma?
Speaker 4 (07:00):
Those people dead?
Speaker 5 (07:01):
Prince actually really surprising me too. So that's like India
and who and Lord.
Speaker 6 (07:13):
Lord Mount Mountain, Boston, Mount Mount Button That that was.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
Prince Charles's uncle. That the IRA, the Irish Queen Elizabeth.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Not only are you royalty, but then you're related to
other royalty? How wild is that?
Speaker 4 (07:42):
Wow? How progressive? Cool?
Speaker 1 (07:44):
We love that in the world. Is Yeah, you're good.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Fine, Yeah, probably try to get a hold of him
and say, can you family at the day at the Yeah, these.
Speaker 4 (07:54):
People are kind of up tight. Yeah, and I need
like a hip person. Yeah. She dropped the ball, drop it.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
She dropped the ball, but then she picked it back
up and said, I'm going to need twenty million does.
Speaker 4 (08:07):
And I'm gonna need you know, and it's going to
have to be a twenty.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
They live in Montecito. Do I not read the paper?
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Where are you?
Speaker 3 (08:15):
Where is where's Monacita?
Speaker 4 (08:17):
It's by Santa Barbara.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
It's an hour and a half hour thorn?
Speaker 5 (08:20):
Okay, yeah, do you remember they left the whole kingdom
though right now, Wow.
Speaker 4 (08:25):
You miss all that?
Speaker 1 (08:27):
Yeah, holy shit?
Speaker 4 (08:31):
Do you read like the news every day?
Speaker 1 (08:33):
Or no?
Speaker 4 (08:33):
Ohkay?
Speaker 1 (08:34):
Absolutely?
Speaker 5 (08:34):
No, absolutely, But also like we don't really know a
lot about the royals anyway, Like we really shouldn't.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
There are people who are There's so much information out
there and so much going on in the world, it's
hard to like keep up with it all.
Speaker 4 (08:48):
What do you read every day? Anything?
Speaker 1 (08:50):
I'm too dyslexic to read. I can't read, Okay, So
I would you listen to I listened to like self
help books. I'm about to listen to this book I'm
really excited about. It's called The Power of Habit.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
Oh, tell us about it?
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Oh that's all I know.
Speaker 4 (09:06):
It just sounds strict.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
It sounds great. Twenty one days to break a habit?
Speaker 4 (09:10):
Correct? Is that correct?
Speaker 1 (09:11):
I don't know. I haven't read the it is Yeah, yeah,
that's it.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Yes, to break a habit, to break a habit?
Speaker 1 (09:17):
Yeah, what about forming a habit twenty two days? Okay?
Speaker 4 (09:22):
That sounds like a drill. Start.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
It sounds like a drill.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
That title makes me nervous.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
What kind of habits?
Speaker 3 (09:28):
I don't want to break?
Speaker 1 (09:29):
I just want to be better? We all want to
be better, like just everything. I feel like my morning
routine isn't the same every day except for taking the
dogs out, you know what I mean. Like I'd love
to like adwer meditate, but I don't have the willpower,
do you, guys?
Speaker 3 (09:50):
I'm pretty I'm pretty regimented in the morning, just.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Because it starts with the gym.
Speaker 5 (09:54):
Like and having a child, you got to wake up, well,
got to be like the kid thing. I guess, yeah
they're up. Yeah, that keeps you like regimented. But no,
as far as journaling, my fingers start hurting my hands
after writing for a while.
Speaker 4 (10:14):
What's wrong with your off?
Speaker 1 (10:17):
I just don't write a lot writing though, like even
like writing like a check sometimes.
Speaker 4 (10:23):
You guys, I know nothing wrong with you.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
You don't do it. You're always typing. Everything's like type
you write iPad. Kathleen writes, well.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
I paint too so o. But I mean, I don't
know my hands a painter for fun. It's nothing I would.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
Show in public, so you won't show.
Speaker 4 (10:42):
You know what I am. I'm the greatest hack. I'm
a great hack. Like, if you give me a picture,
I can paint it. It will look just like that.
But I can't think of.
Speaker 3 (10:50):
Things on my own.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
Like if you give me a blank canvas and say,
paint whatever you want, I don't know what. That's not
a hack, that's actually no, I'm I'm a copy artist.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Really yeah, that's an impressionists and impressionist Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
Well no, because the impressionist thought of their own ship.
I can only copy what they do, Like I should
be kind of somebody should hire me for the criminal
part where you make copies?
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Can you make this monet? Absolutely?
Speaker 4 (11:15):
Mine would get found out though you do like realism.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
The eyes are a little cross, Yeah, they'd be like
a little higher than the other.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
Oh shit, I forgot it's mustache.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Like it would be something blatant where I'd turn it
in and go done. Wait, I guess I don't write,
But even writing, I don't think it.
Speaker 4 (11:38):
I don't know why your hands tuck her out.
Speaker 5 (11:40):
Maybe because we're always like this now, we're always like
this writing.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Like when I start writing in my journal, I'll be like,
oh my god, my hands start hurting.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
It's weird. I go like sometimes I'll like write in
all caps, and then I'll go into a cursive thing
and then I'm like I forgot my like style of writing. Yeah,
it's weird.
Speaker 4 (11:59):
I think you're a dangerous tell us.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Why well, if you watch enough date lines, it always
comes out of some ladies journal. She hands up sucking
herself by the journal, or she might end up showing
you who the killer is through the journal. But really
that that part never seems to pan out as much
as and she wrote in her journal. Yes, and I
(12:26):
got a Holly Hobby one when I was like ten,
I was so excited.
Speaker 4 (12:28):
It was like it was cat the Holly Hobby Diary,
head of key.
Speaker 2 (12:31):
My brothers broke into that like day four, and then
I got mocked for whatever I wrote when you're text
and yeah, and my dad was a lawyer. He said,
don't ever write anything down unless you're.
Speaker 4 (12:41):
Willing to be for that to be read and probably
smart out loud.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
To everyone because you just it's a paranoid thing. But
no on it though, it was like it did well,
the Holly Hobby thing. Unfortunately, like a tooth ding.
Speaker 4 (12:56):
With a gold top.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
I remember, yes, it just drops and opens right to
the page that you're talking about that person.
Speaker 4 (13:10):
Right, I'm talking about my siblings and I don't like school,
and my brother's a ship.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Yeah, like, that's not how do you write? What do
you do about writing your comedy? Do you write that down?
Speaker 4 (13:24):
Do you I've never read. I've never written a joke
about it. I have my joke books I call my
joke books, but it's just words.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Like if you've found it, you would think I might
be schizophrenic, because then I draw stuff and I'm like, oh,
here's a beagle drinking a beer. There'll be a whole
page of my drawing and then you'll flip it out
of it and it'll say amish roofs.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
It's just words.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
It's not our set, and it's just a picture book, the.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Pictures, and I'm bored, yeah on zooms and I'm like.
Speaker 3 (13:56):
Well that's perfect. Nobody could steal your jokes, right, it
will never don't.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Understand the words, so you won't know if I say, mom, target,
you won't know it's a whole bit, right. But I
already know that I'm basically telling true stories.
Speaker 4 (14:09):
So I'm just telling you the story. So writing it out.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
I don't even know how comics do that. That's interesting
things are to me that they sit and write.
Speaker 4 (14:19):
I had to do it for Comedy Central one hundred
years ago.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
When they had those Comedy Central half hours, you had
to put your own act in a script. The only
thing was helpful was I did find that I repeated
a couple things were unnecessary so I could tighten up.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
But anyin't worth all that.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
Yeah, it took me like two hours. Wait, so you,
I'm like, you just get up there and kind of
riff a little.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
Well, okay, Like I went to Target with my mom,
I won't do the joke, and she ended up just
giving me pills out of her person. I took them,
and then she didn't know what the pills were, and
I didn't know what was going to happen to me,
and I'm my god, damn it, mom, I was gonna
have a fun day. And then I ended up passing
out for like three hours, and then they'd wake me
up like every hour to make sure I was not dead.
(15:03):
So when I told my sister, I told my sister.
Speaker 4 (15:07):
The story, but I meant, I mean, it was all true.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
And then I don't think other people's parents have probably
done that, but I think they can relate to hav
an old crazy parent. So I just told what appened.
I just go up on stage and say what happened.
I tell the story.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
We love to have questions. I'm like, I can't really why.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
I said, I'm a pounding sinus headache, and I don't
know if it's allergies.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
We're in Target.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
We have this whole cart full of ship and she goes, oh,
here take this, and it was a pill bottle, but
she calls it her all stars. There's like everything in
there's from breast cancer pills to blood pressure.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Only she knows crazy.
Speaker 4 (15:57):
She's got she won a nerve, so I kind of
trust her.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Oh your mom was a nurse. Kind of sure, I
trust you.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
You're retired for quite some time. But so then she
gave it to me and I took it and then she.
Speaker 4 (16:11):
Goes, oh, what color was that? And I go hurt,
I don't know, mom, I didn't look. She goes, well,
why didn't you look?
Speaker 2 (16:20):
How?
Speaker 4 (16:20):
She's blaming me, why do you look at what color was?
Speaker 2 (16:22):
I go, cause you're not a guy I met at
a party.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
You're my mom, and I thought you knew what you
were doing. I go what She goes, hmmm, it's probably
your dad's blood pressure.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
So my blood pressure is gonna get super low. And
I'm just going to pass out, which is exactly.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
What it ended happening.
Speaker 4 (16:38):
Oh how are you, I don't know, thirty five? Okay,
like old enough? Yeah yeah, I mean yeah, that was what.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
You weren't twelve. I wasn't a kid, Okay, okay, I
pictured like no, you just mean like.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
No, no, at that age, she would have just given
us a shot of hot whiskey.
Speaker 4 (16:56):
She actually was with my sister. She's now a three
flying Florida.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
They actually said, is there a medical person on board?
Somebody who's having a medical emergency. My mom rang her bell.
All right, Mom, I get it. You were a nurse,
but you retired when you were fifty. You're eighty three,
so you were kind of a nurse in the Civil War.
Speaker 4 (17:18):
Let's just be honest. I couldn't believe.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
But she is a great but it's old timey. She's
just gonna give you a stick and say bite on
it and shoot whiskey. I hope you're ready for that
kind of nursing because she's not gonna be nice about
it either.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
It's just gonna be the person was having a seizure.
She's like, well, it's not a Grandma seizure. They'll be fine,
Like that kind of nursing.
Speaker 5 (17:38):
I find amazing old school yet and I wh it works.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
Yeah, fankly, my sister was so appalled. She's like, oh,
I cannot believe you rang that bell. Mom, You're eighty
three years old.
Speaker 4 (17:49):
She goes, I still know what I'm talking about. Thank you.
A choreologist guy also five minutes later rang a bell.
So my mom kind of got off that. Kate said,
I was so relieved.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Because there was somebody younger that I'm like, yeah, but Mom,
I'd still trust her. Their nursing was a school and
stuff was way more intense than what happens these days. Right,
I'm not dogging modern nurses. I'm just saying I know
what they did, know what these do, and.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Well, like that kind of nursing is like the foundation
for what people learn now.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
Yeah, I mean my mom knows still every drug every
They're like doctors, Yeah, they know, some of them know
more than doctors.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
I would trust my mom more than every nurse show
I've ever seen. Nurses What nurse show?
Speaker 3 (18:35):
What are you watching?
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Okay, go ahead, what else? Every nurse show I've ever seen,
everyone always loves the nurses, and the nurses catch the
fucked up thing that the doctor misses.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
Okay, yeah, cray anatomy.
Speaker 4 (18:51):
Maybe nurses wrote those shows.
Speaker 1 (18:52):
If I'm having a serious complication, I want Nurse Meredith
Gray or Christina Yang to help me, or their nurses,
but it's or Nurse Jackie. I don't want any Falco
to come and save me.
Speaker 4 (19:08):
What about Vicky Madighan, she'll come.
Speaker 1 (19:10):
I don't know who that is, but mom, mom, Hello, Sorry, yeah, yeah,
I don't know. I'd be the worst nurse ever.
Speaker 3 (19:24):
I'd be very compassionate, but I would kill so many people.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
I think accidentally ever accidentally killed somebody.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
No, my mom's super good at like math and science
her bedside That's why grandmother My bedside manners were like shine.
Speaker 3 (19:41):
But it's the math and then that would kill people.
Speaker 1 (19:43):
Yeah, the science readers.
Speaker 4 (19:48):
And be like no, I don't do that crazy foreign math.
What is that bullshit on?
Speaker 1 (19:53):
Yeah, I don't understand. I don't understand how their brain
absorbs all that information. Like she still all the pills.
That's crazy.
Speaker 4 (20:02):
She even knows pills that don't exist.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
Because one time I was in their closet, my dad
wanted me to go find a certain golf shirt of his.
Speaker 4 (20:08):
I go no problem.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
I go in there and I move the shirts and
there's all these pills she has hoarded, and I read
the one that says Darvasset, I go, mom, what's up
with the thousand darvas sets back there? Well, best pain medication,
I wrote, it's bullshit that pills expire, and if I
get something horrible, I want to make sure that me
and your dad are set.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
So she had hoarded.
Speaker 2 (20:28):
Over the years, and there was this I'm like, so
I googled it, Darvasset, it's a wicked painkiller.
Speaker 1 (20:34):
She's right, Wow, yeah, I wonder why they just continued it.
Speaker 2 (20:38):
I well, there's probably a very good reason. And Vicky
Madigan doesn't give a shit.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
Okay, great, but I also trust her.
Speaker 5 (20:46):
But in the world, any kind of apocalypse happens like
she's got she's got it, like anyone hurts themselves.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
Yeah, injured pain pills probably don't expire. Something I'm thinking
now Vicky Madigan's ted talk.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
I mean, why what they expider expider expire.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
I don't know. I don't know. I think we're getting
into territory that we don't Oh yeah, this is we
can't we can't handle what we just brought up. None
of us are good at.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Side to go?
Speaker 4 (21:14):
Why would a pill?
Speaker 1 (21:16):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (21:17):
I think what I think?
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Lies? Lies? Lies?
Speaker 4 (21:22):
Oh you just think it's all lies. Well, I have
a doctor friend. I should text he she we should.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
I have a doctor friend too, But also who cares?
Speaker 1 (21:29):
I just I would love to know if pills expire,
like what.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
Happens to it? It's still the safe shape of the pills.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
It's still so I know. That's what I don't like. Yeah,
it's in powder for how long?
Speaker 4 (21:41):
Here's one? This will sound like I know what I'm
talking about, and I don't.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
Okay, but how long do the neutrons and protons and Adams?
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Baby?
Speaker 4 (21:49):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Yeah, yeah, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead?
Speaker 4 (21:51):
What is there? Is it a year? Is it's seven years?
Is it?
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Protons and neutrons? Seven years?
Speaker 3 (21:59):
I just what's proton like?
Speaker 1 (22:01):
Seven years?
Speaker 5 (22:01):
And neutrons about like six six and a half and
Adam Adams about four we made neutrons neutrons or at
least it is a cell and atom is?
Speaker 1 (22:19):
Yeah? Speak up if you know more information than us.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
I flung science every year, and I'm like, why is
no one understanding that?
Speaker 4 (22:32):
I don't get it?
Speaker 1 (22:33):
I don't get it?
Speaker 4 (22:34):
Why do I have to keep doing it? We're made
up of lots of cells cells, but are those atoms?
Speaker 3 (22:39):
There's atoms inside inside the cells.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
And good thing we have computer phones to tell us
an atam is.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
There's more.
Speaker 1 (22:52):
There's definitely more cells. There are atoms as next week
we're going to have a scientist on to clear all
this atom made up. Humans, like matter, are made up
of atoms. Our bodies are composed of tiny particles called atoms,
which combine to form molecules and ultimately build the cells
(23:12):
and tissues that makes us up.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
What's in an atom?
Speaker 1 (23:16):
Pro p? So what do you mean expire? If they expire?
Do we expire? Yes? Yes? So that seven years is
not enough? Okay, so what are we even talking about?
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (23:34):
I'm still medication.
Speaker 1 (23:38):
What was Yeah, I'm here right now.
Speaker 4 (23:45):
Diversion version.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
It sounds like a sci fi show on Apple. Yeah,
came out some of that.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
Real name is the ad for sky Rizzy. I don't
even know what it is, but I don't want to
take it. Everybody's having so much fun.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Jumper, you got rise to this guy, Kathleen.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
Is that Tiffany on your shirt?
Speaker 4 (24:03):
No, it's Stevie Tiffany.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
Alone.
Speaker 4 (24:09):
Now he's out on the road. By the way, she is,
so is she. Stevie's always on the road.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
I know, having like a big Trier or last year.
Speaker 4 (24:20):
Well, sometimes she goes with Billy Joel. I'm not having
any of that.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
With Billy Joel.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
It was okay, yeah, but she's gonna go first because
he's probably mister.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
If it's me and some other comic, I always volunteer
to go first, first, one done, first, one of the bar.
Speaker 4 (24:37):
I don't have the ego. I have the headline who cares?
Speaker 1 (24:42):
But I don't want to love that.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
I love that him. Yeah, I just want to see Stevie.
He's fine, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
But I don't dislike it. Well, I didn't like when
he fell in love with Christy Briekley.
Speaker 4 (24:52):
He did that whole album was so cheesy.
Speaker 2 (24:54):
She's up down downtown. Well, I'm like, like him, what
happened to the Stranger guy? That album was great And
now you're all weird and in love with this lady
and it's terrible.
Speaker 5 (25:07):
I forgot he was married to Christie Brinkley, like hot, hot,
hot Christian Yeah, I know, and then.
Speaker 4 (25:13):
They had do they have babies? Do they have kids together?
She looks like him.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
She looks like him.
Speaker 4 (25:17):
Yeah, she is pretty, it's just different. It would be
hard I think if your mother is like a supermodel
person in the world. Yeah, and then you look like
your day Oh okay, sleep, he's got yeah, he's got
puppy guys.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Okay, yeah, great things. I don't know anything about. So
you've seen c or like her concert live?
Speaker 4 (25:40):
Yeah, many times, like one hundred times. I'm not like
a super crazy like once a year. But she's not
on the road for I don't know, thirty years.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
So oh, yes, I did accidentally meet her. I did
not want to meet her. I don't want to ever
meet people that I think are awesome because yeah terrible right. Well, yeah,
but I did the Tonight Show once, and well I
have done the Ty Show a bunch, so Jay knows.
I'm friends with Jay.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
It's done a bunch, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (26:09):
More than any other woman, if you I bet, I bet,
I think that was my record.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
What Yeah, So anyway with jay Leto like twenty five times.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
She's just sitting over here on our big friend.
Speaker 4 (26:18):
Shut up.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
It's really want in the rotation anyway. So my friend
Bob booked all lot of the people and he goes,
your girlfriend Stevie is going to be doing the Time show.
Speaker 4 (26:31):
It was like a Tuesday. He goes. I go, I'm
coming out.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
I want to see but I don't want to sit
in the audience. I just want to stand on the
side with you. So I did and she was great.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
And then Leno saw me at the end and he goes, hey,
what are you doing up here? I go, nothing, I
just came to get some papers from Bob. Bob goes, no, she.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
Loves Stevie n eggs and she came to see Stephen.
Speaker 4 (26:50):
It's like, oh, Bob God.
Speaker 2 (26:51):
Well.
Speaker 4 (26:52):
Then Jay's like, where does she get a picture with her?
Speaker 2 (26:54):
And he goes and grabs her and I'm like, no,
I don't want any of this.
Speaker 4 (26:58):
What am I going to say that This lady's never Yeah,
Landslide's awesome.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
You'd have to pick a weird song where it would
actually pique her interest. And after the glitter Phades was
super great and didn't get.
Speaker 4 (27:10):
Enough attention, Well, I'm not gonna do that. Yeah, and
she just went hello and I'm like hello.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
And then the photographer took this picture and she looks
perfect because she knows how to instantly she knows how
to pose.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
And I'm like, I'm only like, yeah, people have ever
seen it. I'll take a picture of the picture and
send it.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
To you please.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
And I'm like thirty, so I look super young and
she must have been fifty and.
Speaker 4 (27:40):
She looks great.
Speaker 1 (27:41):
Then yeah, I mean, she looks great. Now.
Speaker 4 (27:43):
I don't want to meet those people.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
But at least it was a good experience. Even though
she ran away, it was fast.
Speaker 4 (27:50):
I just ran away, let her go. She doesn't want to.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
I didn't feel as dumb though, because Jay goes that
their young Comedia is very funny. I friend of mine, like,
it wasn't like I was a psycho. At least there
was a conduit there.
Speaker 4 (28:02):
But also, what, I don't need a picture.
Speaker 3 (28:08):
You had, you had.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
Had your moment. It's like my Dave girl story. I
don't know.
Speaker 5 (28:13):
I met Dave Grol and it was really weird and
that yeah, it was too weird because he was It
was the closest.
Speaker 3 (28:19):
I'll ever get to fucking uh like, no, he's cool.
Speaker 5 (28:25):
I don't really know. I didn't even talk to him.
I just said that we were both eating burger and
I said good burger, and he said, m that's it, and.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
That's it. But I had my moment.
Speaker 5 (28:39):
It was the closest I'll ever get to, uh, Kirk
Obain because I love Nirvana. That's why, Like when I
saw him, I was like, this is the closest I'll
ever get to Kirk Cobain.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
Well, yeah, I was gonna say Courtney right right or yeah,
but it's also it's also Dave girl.
Speaker 3 (28:57):
And he's just he's cool.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
Yeah, he's just cool. I shouldn't be allowed to be around.
There's some people, there's celebrities. Yeah, and I say the
weirdest shit.
Speaker 4 (29:07):
Do you want to know what my friend, this is
the craziest shit I've ever heard.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
And this is a normal friend of mine most of
the time normal, I guess I could say, Well, I'll
say her name.
Speaker 4 (29:17):
I'll make up a name.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
Okay, yeah, there you go, There you go. We can
always edit anything else. We'll call Susan Sarandon, We'll call her.
Speaker 4 (29:24):
Yeah, we'll put it on a different celebrity.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Jessica. Well, well I would die.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
So my friend let's say Mary, Okay, Mary and her
friend and they're from southern Missouri in the boot heel,
so they are we do classify them as a little
Craig Cray.
Speaker 4 (29:39):
They're a little off.
Speaker 2 (29:40):
Little Arkansas e nutty when they want to be. She's
she is enamored, obsessed with Winona Judd. So back like
in the nineties before we really had cell phones and
all that.
Speaker 4 (29:51):
They drove from Missouri down here, went to the courthouse
in Franklin, Tennessee. She goes, I just went to the
porhouse and said, I'm friends with Winona Judd.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
But my directions got all wet when I spilled the
slurpe on him, and cause you tell me how, And
the lady at the courthouse drew a map to drive
to the Jude's house.
Speaker 5 (30:13):
This is what she believes her she and my slurpee
got all over the direction.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
I wrote direction, but I was drinking yet a cherry.
Speaker 4 (30:31):
So they drive, heard her friend, they drive to the property. Yeah,
probably they drive to the property.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
And no, absolutely not.
Speaker 4 (30:42):
And guess who answers Ashley? Damn it, it's not why
if they don't care about Ashley.
Speaker 5 (30:49):
They're obsessed with Lena, beautiful, beautiful Ashley, especially in the
eighties or nineties like she was.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
They can't give me her book at fundraiser things It
was in the gift bag, and I'm like, I guess
I should read it.
Speaker 4 (31:03):
Clearly, Jesus wants me to have it.
Speaker 2 (31:05):
I've been given it times clearly, so and.
Speaker 4 (31:08):
Then I tried to read it and I'm like, huh, yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
What did they do? What did they do recently a book?
Speaker 4 (31:15):
No, probably ten years ago?
Speaker 3 (31:17):
What did they do? Ashley opened the door, and.
Speaker 4 (31:20):
Well, she was very nice and told them wen Ona
went home, you know, just like a regular Joe blow.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
And they were like, well damn and Dyda had no
interest in hanging out with Mama jud or Ashley.
Speaker 4 (31:34):
They're all out there on the property somewhere, bumping.
Speaker 1 (31:36):
Around, and so.
Speaker 4 (31:39):
Yeah, well we know how to get here.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
That is no security because nobody else would be that psycho.
Speaker 4 (31:47):
So I said to my friend to do that.
Speaker 2 (31:49):
So then when they let you, well nowadays, yeah, I'm
saying back then, nobody would thought to go to city hall.
But my friend was a reporter for a living, like
the news reporter stuff, so she knew how to get
people's addresses.
Speaker 5 (32:02):
And also she's not like a stalker. Okay, I spoke
to you sooner.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
But she has a vision and she's a determined person
that she's gonna sit there and have.
Speaker 4 (32:14):
A beer with Winona Judge. Come tell her, I goddamn water?
Speaker 1 (32:17):
Has she no? Yeah? Yeah, the love me. She's gotta
love me.
Speaker 5 (32:27):
I'm gonna show up with the six pack and we're
just gonna shoot the sheep.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
She's gonna love me. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
But you know what, if there was anybody on earth
ACCAPLI ship, I'd say it's my friend.
Speaker 4 (32:38):
Like she could actually do it, and that's what keeps
her going.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Unfortunately, the wow, the confidence delusion, the confidence was she
just a normal person.
Speaker 4 (32:49):
Why wouldn't she want to have a beer if she's bored? Well,
I don't know, I guess. And then I started thinking,
I don't know. I mean I've had beers with random
fans just because I was bored.
Speaker 1 (33:02):
That's a timing thing. They just Yeah, you didn't feel
like a weird vibe from them, that they were normal.
Speaker 3 (33:11):
That's like like and then and then is like how'd
you find where?
Speaker 1 (33:15):
How'd you find you?
Speaker 4 (33:16):
Well, speak to Cindy at City Hall because she's drawn.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
My god, I wonder is that the same house that
they have been in for Yeah, it's all the same. Wow.
So Mary just.
Speaker 4 (33:30):
Knows, she knows no, I'm sure there's some weird gate.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
But first because of Mary's people, Like.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
When they left the deal, Ashley said, nobody's home, blah blah.
Speaker 4 (33:41):
They get in the car, they see a convertible, uh,
top down, red hair and it's Winona going that way.
They missed her. Damn it by like fifteen minutes.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
Did she ever get to meet her?
Speaker 4 (33:54):
She has done the meet and greets where you pay
for that? I said to her, And sad, you are
at so many shows.
Speaker 1 (34:02):
Your picture is female.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
Little picture is involved in the security meeting. You are
the photo like we have to have a little security meeting.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
You're at so many shows.
Speaker 4 (34:12):
That you're in the meet and Greek. We have a
picture and you're probably this one will do anything.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
Yeah, but watch out for this one. You keep good company.
I'll say that I just learned that about you. You
keep great company. You're friends with Mary, Yes, but I
believe you keep them Mary's around. I keep Yeah, the
black happens.
Speaker 4 (34:35):
It's just crazy Mary. He will tell you this story
as if it's totally totally I'm like, oh my god.
If I had done that, I will only tell like
two people on Earth.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
I would have anxiety about it. Oh from the start,
Like god damn it, I can't believe. I. You know,
when there's like the certain things that just stay with
you forever that like randomly you'll just like wake up
from an app and be like, oh my god, I can't.
Speaker 5 (34:58):
Believe Yours are my favorite kind of people that have
like that your awareness, Like that's wrong, Like you don't
go and do something like that.
Speaker 1 (35:06):
I love just like.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
Me.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
I want to sit down and talk to Mary. Yeah.
I don't even know what other stories about her.
Speaker 4 (35:17):
I don't know. Yeah, I think she drinks wine. I
mean I I follow her on Instagram and all that. Yeah,
she seems like she drinks. She's so weird to say
about somebody.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
No, there's a guy there, Yeah, there's a She.
Speaker 4 (35:31):
Seems more of a drinker than a weedy. I always
put them in a caddy.
Speaker 5 (35:34):
You're either like a pill popper person or yeah, pill popper,
psychedelic kind of person.
Speaker 3 (35:40):
Yeah, the psychedelic kind of person.
Speaker 4 (35:42):
The mushroom. Yeah, they're even different than the weed people, definitely. Yeah.
The comedians always used to be instantly divided, Like at
the Improved lay Well, we didn't have anything gainst one another.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
It's just like you're the sowner, You're gonna be outside smoking, yeah,
and then I'm a drinker.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
I'm going to be inside.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
And some of us were sig smokers too, So I
got to know both crowds because I'm out with the stoners,
but I'm just smoking cigs.
Speaker 4 (36:04):
And then i'd.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Coinside with my drinkers. But the drinkers are drinkers. We
hardly ever like form lifelong friendships.
Speaker 4 (36:13):
The drink drinkers and drinkers, the drinkers and the weirders
the drinks, because they're different.
Speaker 1 (36:18):
Running you're down, how are we ever gonna?
Speaker 3 (36:21):
I don't know how people get really high and get
on stage until.
Speaker 1 (36:24):
A lot you don't either, you get and I'd be
like shaking and weird.
Speaker 2 (36:32):
Well maybe not that takes like. I'm never nervous going
on stage. I just don't ever well at a corporate gig.
Always at a corporate gig, because I feel like they're
paying me a lot of money and odds are it's
not going to go well.
Speaker 4 (36:44):
Well, sometimes it does.
Speaker 2 (36:46):
It's like Russian roulette. YEA four shows are fine, but
one the bullets in there and it's terrible. And then
my Midwest off feels guilty taking the money because I
didn't really do that good.
Speaker 1 (36:56):
You take that money, but.
Speaker 4 (37:00):
I just don't really don't try not to do them
anymore possible.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
But I would maybe have like, but then I think, Okay,
if I'm nervous with this corp of gig, maybe well
I'm just a horrible weed person.
Speaker 4 (37:10):
But let's say I decided four beers. Yeah, then I
would feel like I'm not really in charge of what
I'm doing here. Yeah, I don't. The stoner people a
whole joint. Josh Blue will tell you it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
I just go, yeah, how I think it's the equivalent
of if you feel better and more relaxed having two
beers before you go on stage, and you're like I'm
like quick, I'm like, I'm locked in, tuned in. I
feel like it's the equivalent of people that smoke really
like a lot of weed before they go on stage.
I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. I'm
(37:45):
just no, no, no, that's right, checks out, it checks out.
Speaker 4 (37:47):
It's like the equivalent of that or now I have
a question going backwards, okay, because I.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Know what I when I when you get up, you
like go to the gym, and all that. When I
get up, I instantly read all the news, whether it's Twitter, Instagram,
all of this.
Speaker 4 (38:03):
What do you do when you wake up? What do
you do in the morning?
Speaker 1 (38:07):
If I do you?
Speaker 4 (38:08):
If you don't turn on the TV or you do
turn I don't turn this, you don't turn no music?
Speaker 1 (38:14):
Yes I will. I get up the dogs and I
have like a minute to like say hi, it's every
morning I wake up. Their little heads are like, oh cool,
you're awake, and I'm like, I'm awake.
Speaker 4 (38:29):
Are they in the bed?
Speaker 1 (38:30):
In the bed?
Speaker 4 (38:31):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (38:31):
And we have a little moment little time. We immediately
go for like a twenty minute walk. We come back in.
I give them bones. If you haven't had coffee or anything, no,
I put them in there. That's a lot. That's a
lot before a cup of coffee. Oh I have drinking
coffee coffee right, boom boom, Yeah I'm not drinking a lot.
(38:53):
That's true.
Speaker 4 (38:54):
Well right, yeah, it's had your druthers though.
Speaker 1 (38:57):
Yeah. I usually do like a protein shake with coffee
in it immediately. Yeah, I don't even know how to
make one so good. And then I ask Alexa to
play meditation music and I light an incense. And then
if I have to post something, I post it. If
I have to do like, it's whatever. I Sometimes I
wake up and I like start vacuuming. Sometimes I'm like,
(39:18):
oh I got it clean, and I just like have
a lot of energy and I just start cleaning the house.
Oh yeah, I don't know. Okay, what news forum should
we start following? Apple?
Speaker 4 (39:30):
Is?
Speaker 1 (39:30):
What do we do? What Twitter is gonna? Black Twitter?
Speaker 2 (39:34):
No, okay, no, Blackwater is my favorite.
Speaker 1 (39:40):
I think you're the one who told me about black Twitter.
Speaker 4 (39:43):
Because when when there's a black oh you are.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
That's why I know it too separately.
Speaker 4 (39:47):
It's my favorite thing. You're telling you. It's the best
when when a black person goes wrong or.
Speaker 2 (39:55):
Does something questionable the black community and they have their
own thing. It's within Twitter, but it's hashtag black Twitter.
It's the funniest shit I've ever read.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
And so somebody has to fuck up and then they
go ham on them.
Speaker 4 (40:08):
Well like let's say yeah. Then they'll be like, well,
well here's a good example. This is a better example.
Speaker 2 (40:18):
So I need a baker who's you know the singer
the RNBCU she canceled the concert in Atlanta, Like it's
seven o'clock.
Speaker 4 (40:27):
And the show was supposed to start at eight. Oh
so black But here's what I loved about.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
But but isn't she eighty years old? Though, Anita Baker.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
She's sixty four. I'm not eighty.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
Is that what you won't? Baby?
Speaker 4 (40:41):
I got it.
Speaker 1 (40:42):
That's Athatha and she is dead.
Speaker 4 (40:46):
She's dead.
Speaker 3 (40:51):
Yeah, breaking news Twitter, breaking news on black Twitter.
Speaker 4 (40:55):
Put that on there.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
Y'all know that Aretha Franklin, Jesus.
Speaker 4 (41:02):
White lady chiming in is the reason Franklin alive.
Speaker 1 (41:05):
We're dead. Her cells are gone, Adam Adam's expired.
Speaker 2 (41:15):
So Anita cancels their concert, right, they'll last minute and
it's the day, it's a Saturday before Mother's Day. Well,
black Twitter, I knew it was gonna go crazy because
there's eighteen thousand people down at the State Farm Arena
or whatever it is in Atlanta and there in the shows, well,
half of black Twitter.
Speaker 4 (41:32):
Was like, this is some bullshit, motherfucker.
Speaker 1 (41:34):
How you do? What do you wait here?
Speaker 4 (41:36):
We'll hear aunty Na I got time for this kind
of bullshit.
Speaker 2 (41:40):
Then the other half, the other half though, was like,
you don't know, you need to be nice to Auntie Nanna.
Speaker 4 (41:46):
Something tragic may have happened, which I'm with that crowd.
You don't know till you know. It does suck. You
drove down there, it does suck.
Speaker 5 (41:55):
Worse things have happened, but like an hour before, something
seems like something seemed like something happens.
Speaker 4 (42:01):
May but she has a track, her hered sometimes of
doing things.
Speaker 1 (42:06):
Oh this is her thing.
Speaker 4 (42:07):
Well it's not necessarily thing, it just has happened. There's
a fight with baby Face. I follow off. She had
a fight with baby Face. Yeah, and guess who don't
win on that one? Babyface? Yeah no, no, no, no, no,
not on black Twitter. They ain't having it.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
Antie nanay Ancyne wins baby Face.
Speaker 4 (42:26):
Can you take two steps back, two step back, little man?
Speaker 2 (42:30):
Yeah yeah, Auntie Nana got this one. But anyway, that's
my favorite. Where were Where were I getting what happened? Well,
I gotta say I saw Anita in Atlanta. He went
too long, he did too much time, and you can't
do that as the opener. Oh he was thinking he's
(42:50):
a co headliner and no, no, no, no, no went
over say Anita Baker and baby Face. It said Anita
Baker with special guests. That means you're the opening act.
Speaker 4 (43:02):
Sure, and he was not by a million. No, I
can't say I wasn't having fun.
Speaker 2 (43:07):
He did produce every song in the nineties baby face,
and then shagged them all.
Speaker 4 (43:12):
It was like one of the big boxers blew up
of nineties awesome songs. So we're all having a good time.
But I also understand if it's her and I'm staying
that stage going what the fuck we Yeah? I told
him to do forty five, we're in an hour ten?
Speaker 3 (43:27):
Yeah, oh shit, oh yeah, yeah, Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (43:30):
Have you ever had an opener do that to you?
Speaker 5 (43:32):
No?
Speaker 1 (43:33):
Oh, that's good.
Speaker 4 (43:33):
They I don't think, No, I don't.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
I think the people that I hire, well, I mean
randomly in clubs back in the day, when I didn't
know who the opener was, there were ones that went
off the rails.
Speaker 4 (43:43):
But I'm like, that is not my monkey, not my circus.
The club needs to.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
Work on that ship.
Speaker 4 (43:49):
Where'd you get this guy?
Speaker 2 (43:52):
You're gonna let this go on whole week. I mean,
there's a middle act after that guy. So I'm free
and clear.
Speaker 4 (43:58):
As long as the middle is not crazy, I don't
even have to worry about that train wreck. I get
to enjoy it for the back of the room, but
not my monkey mony.
Speaker 1 (44:08):
I just want to know, like all the crazy shit,
Like the comedy world is just.
Speaker 3 (44:14):
So well, you're learning so much more about it now
from a j yeah, but also like there's just a.
Speaker 4 (44:21):
Lot of rejects. There's very few normal people.
Speaker 3 (44:23):
I'm learning that, yeah, yeah, what comedians.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
And we don't speak to one another like corporate people
at all.
Speaker 2 (44:31):
Like I don't even speak to an agent like that,
Like I didn't like human resources and stuff doesn't exist
within our world and nothing nothing exists, like I know
there's no HR, Like I will write back to an agent,
what the fuck none of this was said before.
Speaker 4 (44:47):
I can't even believe it.
Speaker 2 (44:49):
I'm gonna go have a beers call me later a
bullshit yeah, And then like people that have.
Speaker 4 (44:54):
Corporate jobs, the email reads bumping this to the top
of your email.
Speaker 2 (44:59):
Moment forward, I wish you would tell me that, but
we don't speak like you are probably the.
Speaker 1 (45:07):
Yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 2 (45:08):
And I think my thinks I'm a super nice person
because I don't really yell or type in all caps
or bitch compared to I think there's some real problems
out there.
Speaker 1 (45:21):
I think there's a lot of shitty people that people
think are great.
Speaker 5 (45:24):
But also I think that's just that's that's everything That'dstryeah.
Speaker 1 (45:29):
Yeah, but you like want to love comedians, Yeah, that's
you really want to love you being mister happy clown.
Speaker 4 (45:35):
You're presenting yourself as miss Eviss, happy clown and funny clown,
and then off stage you're this monster that if let's
say Marilyn Manson is a monster, well he's a monster
on stage. He's always a monster.
Speaker 2 (45:50):
So it's not like, oh, I thought you were a funny,
sort nice, an everyday guy.
Speaker 4 (45:56):
Yeah, you're clearly bizarre, right you present your car, right,
it's bizarre. Right.
Speaker 5 (46:02):
And now, like you said, because of social media and everything,
it's so easy to find out who you are, right,
Like you can you can be all shiny over here,
and then there's videos of you being a total jerk
off like everybody, your fans or whatever.
Speaker 1 (46:15):
Yeah, they'll all.
Speaker 4 (46:16):
Find out too. Sometimes it takes years and years and years.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
There's a few people that all of us were waiting,
when will the world not buy this bullshit anymore? Yeah?
And then that it's something stupid, it's something small that
just boom and exposes.
Speaker 3 (46:31):
Well, because the truth will always reveal itself.
Speaker 1 (46:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (46:35):
Yeah, but sometimes it takes too much, sometimes while, but
it usually usually always does that.
Speaker 2 (46:41):
Yes, that's why complaint with karma when people go, well, karma,
it'll come around.
Speaker 4 (46:46):
It needs in my lifetime.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
I don't like it. Well years, I don't care anymore.
Speaker 4 (46:57):
Wait, how's that karma wheel? How do we kick it?
Like hicked the wheel?
Speaker 2 (47:00):
Yeah, to make a confront, because how many good years
do those people get?
Speaker 3 (47:04):
I know, how much money have they made being look
at Oj?
Speaker 4 (47:09):
How many years do we all believe he was the god?
Speaker 2 (47:12):
I'm older than you guys, but I remember the Hurts
commercials and he's so handsome and he's funny, and you know,
I didn't know he was going home and beating people up, Like, oh,
you guys.
Speaker 1 (47:21):
Think he killed them?
Speaker 2 (47:23):
What?
Speaker 4 (47:27):
No?
Speaker 1 (47:27):
I didn't until I read his book.
Speaker 4 (47:29):
Yeah, and then I was like, oh my god, did
he do it? No?
Speaker 1 (47:34):
I think everyone knew that OJ did it. And I
don't think anyone cared when he died. I think that
people are like, oh, yeah, nobody cares.
Speaker 4 (47:42):
Oh no, you didn't know this, he.
Speaker 1 (47:46):
Marik.
Speaker 4 (47:46):
We have so much breaking news, you know, breaking news,
breaking news, O J Simpson died.
Speaker 2 (47:51):
O J.
Speaker 1 (47:51):
Simpson died in Florida. Twitter. Yeah, and nobody cares. Yeah.
I knew that. Yeah, I knew that in jail. Right,
he died in jail.
Speaker 3 (48:04):
No, no, no, he got out.
Speaker 1 (48:12):
Twitter. He got out of jail, had a I know,
do you need another beer?
Speaker 4 (48:18):
P Yeah, I do.
Speaker 3 (48:20):
He got out of jail.
Speaker 1 (48:22):
He got out of jail. His time crazy or he
had some sickness.
Speaker 4 (48:28):
Well he did, yes, that's how he died. But he
got out of jail before he had sickness.
Speaker 3 (48:32):
He had just done his time, which was not enough time.
Speaker 4 (48:36):
He did.
Speaker 2 (48:37):
He got put in jail for stealing the trophy back.
He never got convicted for murdering people.
Speaker 1 (48:43):
Nicole.
Speaker 4 (48:44):
Oh, that's a whole segment. Mar I didn't hear about steal.
So in Las Vegas they were reselling this totally boring,
but they were recent No.
Speaker 1 (48:55):
Okay, so O J got free and clear of of
Asian or something. I remember that back in the nineties.
He was free, free, cleare.
Speaker 4 (49:03):
So what he was doing to make money was doing
because you can charge cash like sign and stuff at
a public thing like come meet OJ and a meet
and greet. Basically okay and he'll sign shit for you
for twenty bucks whatever.
Speaker 2 (49:16):
So that's how he was making money that really the
government can't track because if it's cash, you don't know
how many people are there black right, But he starts
to get into the memorabilia world. OJ does like, meaning, hey,
there's an auction of a Heisman trophy all this crap.
Speaker 4 (49:31):
If you've ever seen there have been date lines about it,
like somebody kills somebody over sports memorabilia. He's now part
of that genre. Okay, Well, there's these guys.
Speaker 2 (49:39):
In Vegas in a downtown casino hotel. So they're not
even on the main drag. They're downtown, which already says
he they.
Speaker 4 (49:48):
They a guy calls OJ and says they have your this, this, this.
Speaker 2 (49:53):
And this like Heisman trophy all is and he's like, well,
I want my ship back. So he got these thuggy
guys to go with them.
Speaker 4 (49:59):
But they were armed.
Speaker 2 (50:01):
Now, OJ says he didn't know they were armed, but
they walked in and guns started coming out and said
give us the shit back or you're not leaving.
Speaker 4 (50:08):
This hotel room.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
That right there is technically kidnapping. You're holding an adult
against their will with a firearm and he was guilty
of that.
Speaker 3 (50:15):
And then he got coming.
Speaker 4 (50:17):
He got like six year sentences six alor he served
six yeah, for that incident in Vegas. And then he
was released and then he went to Florida, Okay.
Speaker 1 (50:27):
And then he got sick. And then he released a
video saying, you know, I'm feeling really good. I'm feeling
so much better. I think I'm gonna be I can't
wait to just get back at it.
Speaker 4 (50:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (50:38):
And then and then he died the next day.
Speaker 4 (50:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (50:40):
And then he died the next day and then karma.
Speaker 1 (50:44):
Thank you guys so much for tuning in to The
Touchup Podcast. Please follow us on Instagram at the touch
Up Podcast, follow us on TikTok at the touch Up.
If you have any beauty questions, give us a ring
six one, five, three, three, eight five to nine by
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