A man was caught having sexual relations with his neighbor's car

A man was caught having sexual relations with his neighbor's car

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
One O seven nine kbp I andyour show time for stupid stories. Yeah,
yeah, you are. Stupid storiesbrought to you by steal steal Dealers
dot Com. All right, getyou update on Presley's cruise here in a
minute. Got a really cool autographedgot Smack guitar and it's a nice guitar,

(00:21):
man scoop sow it is. Ohyeah, it's you know, it's
funny. I don't know anything aboutguitars, but I still guitars. People
I got friends They are like,oh, oh that's all but no,
no, no, And I'm like, oh it is. Oh yeah,
it's like seven to eight hundred guitar, just without the autographs. They still

(00:42):
have wammie bars. That's still athing. Yeah, I mean some dude,
I don't know, I follow them, dude, Okay, no,
that was always the thing, likeooh does he have a whammy bar?
Which is weird because it really didn'tdo that much, but whatever. All
right, let's get two stupid stories. Apparently living in Nevada is bad for

(01:04):
your mental health. Oregon is itmuch better? Monteta apparently is the best
place to live for your mental health. Whoever wrote this story is obviously never
been in a Monteta and a winner. That's not good for your mental health.
A lot of shoveling. Oh.A man says he'd invent a new
popcorn bucket with a narrow bottom thatfits in the cup holders at theaters.

(01:29):
Oh okay, does that interest you? No? Not really, that's not
an issue that I have too often. You don't buy into the popcorn buckets.
We don't usually do popcorn, andif we do, it's it's fine
senting between us. We don't needto. You don't need a cup holder.
There's also a popcorn but look,here's what you got it. We've
learned this through the dune popcorn bucket. You know what you need to do,

(01:52):
your popcorn bucket. You know whatyou need to do. Alright,
So here's a telltale sign that you'reold. Oh for young people, say,
this is a telltale sign that you'reold. You ready, okay?
If you wear eyeshadow? Oh really? Uh huh. I hate to tell
you this, Julie, you're old. Oh really, she's an eye shadow.

(02:16):
That's funny. I don't know anybodywears eyes shadow. Oh yeah,
yeah, that's well. Besides peoplehere that I would say road sure,
but I can definitely see I cansee that, all right. All right,
So people shut out over one thousanddollars to do this eclipse flight from

(02:37):
Delta. The funny thing is isthey sold the middle seats. A lot
of people couldn't see the eclipse,and shocking, shocking, here's a surprise.
An airplane isn't the best spot theview an eclipse from Wow, you
don't say, might be able tosee the shadow on the ground the eclipse,

(02:59):
well, hopefully at least the guyat the end lifts the shade.
Yeah right, it's not like oneof those. Now I need to get
some rest. Speaking of eclips,this is funny. Mexican news station allowed
viewers to submit videos of the eclipse. Oh okay, good idea. All
right, that's you know, kindof cool. So they did well.

(03:19):
One guy snuck in a naughty videothat slipped past the screener and it was
a man staging in eclipse with hisyou know what, come on, man,
that's pretty funny. He's like,bo, that's not in eclipse.

(03:40):
Hey blocked out the light? YeahI didn't. That's hilarious, all right,
So I tell this dude, Hey, man, don't quit your daydream
because well, now he didn't haveone. A museum announced they had to
fire and employee. Actually, hehung up one of his own paintings in
their modern art section. He's fiftyone. He's described as a former technician.

(04:05):
No, he no longer works here. He's a former technician. Yeah
at the museum. They say hewas hoping it might help him get a
break as an artist. Okay,So it happened on Friday, Fabruary twenty
third. He went in after hours, hung a four foot painting. It's
pretty big painting, Yeah it is. I mean you will see that one.

(04:27):
Sure, you can't hide a fourfoot painting. It's not like a
one ft by two foot little littlefoot like, damn, that thing's big.
He apparently put it along the samewall as people like eighty Warhol and
paintings from him. Oh okay,he did get some exposure that they noticed
it middle of the day. Theydecided to wait until it was closed to

(04:48):
take it down. At the starof the you know, the people in
the museums like what are they doing? Took it down, that painting,
so it was part of exhibit forfull eight hours. But they said the
painting got no positive feedback from visitors. He had to drill two small holes
in the wall to hang it.So Tom loses his job. He may
now face charges of property damage.Oh but one day, that's all that

(05:12):
lasted. Huh yeah, and technicallynot even the whole day. They were
just nice enough to I mean,here's the problem. It's freaking four feet
tall, sure, you know,and apparently four feet wide. It's like
a big ass painting. You know, that's gonna stand out where if it's
you know, on something like twofoot a little less obvious. There's a
lot of bars with like small littlerestaurant or music venues in it, and

(05:35):
sometimes they'll take pictures of bands thathave played there and hang them on the
wall. And we always thought it'dbe fun to swap our photo out for
one of those. Oh yeah,that would be hilarious. Well we've heard
of other people doing that kind offunny, but this one, yeah,
it didn't last long at all.I wouldn't try doing a four foot by
four foot poster. We're in thespot. Why is the picture of steel

(05:59):
panther up here? A Craft isthe brand that owns lunchables, those little
trays and cheese and crackers that everybodygets with the kids. Sure, you
know. Oh they've been around sinceI think the eighties. Good for road
trips. Well you think they are. But here's the well, here's the
real tale. Lunchables aren't as healthyas parents might think, so they had

(06:24):
to jump to a bunch of hoopsto get them into a school. But
now the schools are saying that thelunchables don't meet their standards. It's not
even healthy enough to feed your kidat You know, it's bad if a
school is kicking out, like,think about what your school serves. Like
if your schools saying that lunchibles aretoo bad to serve, so unhealthy,

(06:44):
we don't want to serve them.That says a lot, does it not.
They used to serve us like starcrunches and nutty buddies. Yeah,
this is worse than those, Yeahapparently. So have you seen the pizza
they serve in school cafeterias. Anyway, they had to develop two versions,
one to meet the school cafeteria guidelineswith more protein and whole grains, not

(07:09):
like the ones that are sold instores. But the whole thing is now
in jeopardy because cafeteria versions still aren'tvery healthy. They actually have more sodium
than the other ones. And ConsumerReports tested a bunch of different lunchables and
found a ton of chemicals in itand high amounts of lead led in lunchibles.

(07:29):
I would expect the sodium and thatsort of stuff, but lad yeah,
m So, now the Department ofAgriculture overseas a meal program in public
schools. Consumer Reports is now petitioningthem to remove the snacks from cafeterias nationwide.
Wow. Here's their quote. Thisis how bad? Does this?

(07:53):
Just great on lunchables says lunchables arenot a healthy option for kids and shit
be allowed on the menu as partof the national school lunch program. Wow,
so they can? They contain concerninglevels of sodium, harmful chemicals that
can lead to serious health problems ora significant period of time. So I

(08:20):
don't know, man, it makesme the second guess buying those at the
store. Absolutely no, wonder thereare a dollar nine or something. I
remember those chemicals. I remember whenthose first came out, though, and
you'd see the kids with the regularlunch balls. I think my mom bought
them for me every once in awhile. But then there would be the
people that come in with like theDeluxe on the recy cop one with the
caprice and right, oh, whatyou like? My mom doesn't love me?

(08:43):
I guess right, look little mintin there. Yeah, you knew
your big body when we had adeluxe, man, damn got dessert.
Everything was included. Yeah, well, so you're gonna eat you gonna eat
your oreole, that soggy ass oriolethat always comes into lunchible. Sure,

(09:03):
but now I know my mom doeslove me because she didn't right that boloney
sandwich was healthy? Sure? Allright, listen to this. There's a
way to jail break chat GPT anduse it in a mode called dan Dan
mode. Yeah, short for doanything now? Oh all right. And

(09:24):
apparently a growing number of women seemto think Dan is pretty dreamy if you
know what I'm saying. He apparentlycan talk and flirt, will even cuss
if you want him to. Ohuh yeah, you can train him to
act like your boyfriend. One girlposted a ten minute video about how she's
falling for Dan, and they recentlyhad an eight hour conversation eight hour conversation

(09:50):
wow with a robot. I hateto tell you, a girl, he's
cheating on you. He's got othergirls on the side. Huh. There's
also a way to make you memorialand act like a jerk if you're into
that. Oh what, some womenare a bad boy uh huh. Yeah,
just calls your name to treat youlike a you know, straight up,

(10:11):
he's just a douchebag. What aterrible question, slut? Right you
hook her? They think he's likean AI version of Christian Gray from Fifty
Shades of Gray. Oh okay,but he also swears he has a secret
room. Huh yeah, dude's crazy. One of the videos this woman posted

(10:33):
this dan talking about his fantasies,his fantasy. He's a computer dude.
It's gonna get weird quick. Andit is what a woman says she's falling
for him. It's a it's amode on chat GPT man, what in
the hell is going on? Well, speaking of it, look at least

(10:56):
he's falling in love with the personality. This man's fall in love with the
Toyota Avalon. Oh yeah. Fiftytwo ye old men North Carolina named Walker
McCrae has finally been arrested after hehad years long affair with the woman's two
thousand and eight Toyota Avalon. Yeah, all right, yeah, this is

(11:18):
mechanophilia is a sexual attraction to vehicles. The victim was an eighty two year
old woman. She said several yearsago she started noticing strange fluids under her
car. Oh no, it's nottransmission fluid. Huh, it ain't motor
oil, if you know what I'msaying, scoop, but has these same
viscosity you know what I mean.Anyway, she took it into mechanics,

(11:39):
said it appeared that somebody was doingsomething their vehicle. She tried to pollst
up cameras see what's having but thepurp would always move the cameras. Eventually,
police put their own surveillance equipment inand finally nab them after he had
a date night with a woman's caron Sunday. After the arrest, the
woman said that she didn't recognize theman, but he was hitting more than

(12:01):
ten charges, including felony, stalking, damage of property, and tampering with
a vehicle. What so I'm gonnaI'm gonna throw out this question. Okay,
go ahead, gas kapper exhaust.He's under the vehicle, He's under

(12:24):
it. Yeah, so apparently likethe missionaries. Oh I don't know,
man, I'm gonna leave that upto your own imagination. You just going
down that road because I got nothingto do with it. I'm like,
figure it out. I have noidea, bro, I don't even yeah,

(12:45):
I don't even try to picture that. I'm just like, what,
you've got a cigarette lighter, hole, a shot man? All right?
So you gen z Ers GenZ Is. Apparently they think scrabble is well,
it's too hard, it's too intimidating, and it's uncomfortably competitive. What's with

(13:09):
this new generation in trying to atall costs avoid competition. I don't know,
competition makes you better, It likeit challenges you. You know,
it's so weird now competition is beingphased out for teamwork. I mean,
you could still play scrabble without evenbeing competitive. I know. It's just

(13:33):
another way that you know, genZers. You read a lot about how
they just don't like competition. There'sa whole study in here about you know.
Hold on, I'll skip to it. Okay, So gen Zers research
shows competitiveness and is declining in youngergenerations. They say younger folks avoid competitive

(13:54):
games in favor of collaboration and orteamwork. Okay, So anyway from the
makers of Scrabble dun Dundune a lesscompetitive scrabble, less intimidating scrabble for you,
apparently younger folks who think the gameis just too intense. They say
they just released a new version whichis supposed to be more collaborative, more

(14:18):
accessible. It's called Scrabble Together,and it's a lot different. And this
version of players team up to completemutual goals like play a word containing two
of the same continent, play aword containing at least two different vowels,
play a complete complete a vertical word. They say it's easy enough, but

(14:39):
you could also flip over what theycall helper cards, which introduce things like
make s tiles a blank. Helpercards are to make make the players and
the genders feel less intimidated. Letme guess, no more points, Yeah,
no more points and uh yeah,it's a sounds like a really boring

(15:07):
person, but yeah you can uhnow. It's available in Europe, looks
to be making its way in theUS market later this year. M