June 19, 2025 • 30 mins
Our children and teens are increasingly being targeted by online predators wanting to exploit, abuse and sextort them. With June being Internet Safety Month, Manny Munoz discussed these things with former Florida State Senator Lauren Book a child-abuse survivor, advocate, and founder of the nonprofit Lauren’s Kids to educate families.
Kids these days are entering puberty earlier than they ever have. Why is it happening, what problems does it contribute to and what do parents need to know? Munoz spoke with Renowned Clinical Psychologist Dr. Sheryl Ziegler on the Early Onset of Puberty, What Parents Can Do to Help and Her New Book THE CRUCIAL YEARS
Kids these days are entering puberty earlier than they ever have. Why is it happening, what problems does it contribute to and what do parents need to know? Munoz spoke with Renowned Clinical Psychologist Dr. Sheryl Ziegler on the Early Onset of Puberty, What Parents Can Do to Help and Her New Book THE CRUCIAL YEARS
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to iHeartRadio Communities, a public affairs special focusing on
the biggest issues in facting you this week.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Here's many Munnos and welcome to another edition of Iheartradios Communities.
As you heard, I am Manny Muno's. Sometimes the headlines,
the stories get lost in the noise and the clutter
of our media landscape. But kids in our country are
being targeted incessantly by those looking to exploit them assault, abuse, rape, kidnapping, sextortion,
(00:34):
and more. Well, June is Internet Safety Month, so let's
discuss how kids are targeted and how we could protect them.
So we bring in Lauren Books. She's a former Florida
State senator, a child abuse survivor and advocate who founded
a nonprofit named Lauren's Kids to educate families and protect kids.
Lauren always appreciates some time. Thanks for joining us.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
Oh my goodness, thank you so much for having me.
I'm going to travel around with you every day.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Well, I appreciate you talking to us because part of
the reason I wanted to do this. Kids these days
are growing up in a completely different environment than you
did and absolutely than I did, and it all has
to do with social media and the digital fingerprint, whether
it's YouTube kids or roadblocks or TikTok things like that,
and that's the open door into the kids.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
Absolutely. I mean listen, first of all, thank you so
much for having me and for having these conversations. I
think it's so important for your listeners to to no
one understands the things that are happening, and listen. I'm
a mom, and I keep it as real as I
possibly can. I think that you know, it's the summertime
and kids are on their tablets, maybe more than they
are during the regular school year with some of that
(01:44):
extra structure. It's how we survive. But and in that
same vein, we want to make sure that that families
are having these conversations, that parents understand that there are
real practical steps that they can take to make sure
that their children are being safe on line and that
they're exercising caution when using digital devices. It's important to
(02:07):
know that one out of every five children that touch
a digital device, regardless of their gender, are going to
be solicited for sex online. But it's a very real
piece of our world that children interface with technology every
all day. But there are things that families can do
every single day to keep their children much safer if
you think about it this way. I have two eight
(02:27):
year old children. I would never just drop them off
at the mall at eight o'clock in the morning and
say see at three, I love some money on some
gift cards. We wouldn't do that. But while your children
are sitting right now in your living room, or in
their bedrooms or in their kitchen, if they're on their devices,
it's the same thing if you're not monitoring some of
the things they're doing, and you don't have some of
(02:48):
those conversations as a family. So I'm really excited to
talk about ways to keep children safe online.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
How is it you mentioned one in five kids is
going to be sexually solicited online. It's hard to imagine
that that number is that high. How is it that
these these pedophiles others targeting them make that contact with
the kids?
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Well, I mean, well, we think about you know, social
media and different platform usage, whether TikTok you mentioned, or
Instagram and in those typical ways. But I would tell
you roadblocks minecraft gaming systems are a way that predators
seek to harm our children. I would encourage all families
to have lots of conversations about safe usage on those
(03:35):
apps and platforms. But I would also say that parents
really do need to get on the apps. I know
that I'm one of those doom scrollers, but I should
It's part of my emotional regulation at the end of
the day. But I think that the reality is that
parents do need to get on the apps that your
children are on. No one understand the different restrictions that
(03:58):
exist on a lot of the different platforms. You can
limit some of the people that they can interface with
or talk to at all, and I would encourage them
to do that. But more than that, it's not just
setting different limits on the apps and different things that
your children can do. It's establishing a code of conduct
for your children to be online safely. Just like you
(04:21):
have conversations about being a safe citizen in our real life.
In real life in our community, we want children to
have a code of conduct for how they should behave online.
They don't give out personal identifying information, they don't post
pictures without permission, and if they do post pictures with
your permission, that you, as the adult in their life,
(04:42):
are checking to make sure that logos aren't on t
shirts or after collectivities are easily identifiable location is turned off,
so that there are real serious boundaries around how they
share in the digital world. We also encourage family to
have a written safety agreement with children who are online,
(05:03):
so that everybody knows and understands what exists, how it exists,
and why we do the thing that we do. I
also think that really it's important, as we talked about,
to limit some of the things that they're doing on
the apps themselves, but as parents, we need to audit
that often. I tell my children every day on their iPads,
I own this iPad. I can go on this iPad
(05:25):
and don't do anything that you don't want me to
see or say anything you don't want me to see.
But as parents, we need to check that out, We
need to look at it, we need to continue to
monitor it. Don't think that they don't know the codes,
because they do, but make sure that you're regularly auditing them.
But again, also talk openly about the dangers of the
(05:46):
digital world with your children. Let them know one understand
that people who they babies are talking to online may
not be the people that they think that they are,
and really have some of those open and honest conversations
because those are really important, loving conversations to have. And
if children do mess up and they share something that
they shouldn't or there's a really unfortunate situation. We see
(06:10):
a lot of sex stortion right now. At the foundation
that they come to you, that they feel safe enough
to come to you, that you can help them solve
any problem. We just had a case not too long
ago where unfortunately a mom has lost her son committed
suicide after a situation of sex stortion. It's happening every day.
It's a reality of our world, and we can do
(06:32):
more and have some of those conversations, just like we
do to prevent childhood sexual abuse. Those are the same
conversations we need to have around the internet because we
live in a digital world. There's no way to have
an abstinence abstinence mind when it comes to the inner interwebs,
the interwebs right.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
The website, by the way, if you want to get
more information, is Laurenskids dot org. Laurens Kids dot org.
You talk about kids are going to be connected these day?
Speaker 1 (07:00):
Is right?
Speaker 2 (07:00):
If we take away the electronics, it almost feels like
as a parent, we're punishing ourselves. One of the rules
we have in my house and I've got nine and
eleven year olds. You're not using your iPad in your bedroom,
You're using it out in the living or the family room.
So at least you're surrounded by people, and you're right,
you do have to monitor what they're doing. It is
your iPad at all times, and you could go on
(07:22):
there and see what they're doing, or their history or
anything else. And I don't think enough parents do that.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
I think that that's one of those things where we
think that our children are entitled to some level of privacy,
but not when it comes to these things. You know,
there are different apps that you can use, whether it's
Kids Messenger or others where the text messits are coming
directly to you. But again, the reality of this is
having open and honest communication with your children. Letting them know,
(07:52):
I am going to check, I'm gonna look, I'm going
to know, you know, the snapchats, all of those things.
We have to engage with those two. Understand what our
kids are doing and they are growing up in a
digital world, and so also letting them know that, you know,
the truth of the matter is likes or videos and
(08:13):
all of this does not equal, you know, reality right,
that that should not build their self esteem who and
what they are should do that there's lots of pieces
of parts to this that you know, during this month,
while kids are again engaging in technology, perhaps maybe more
and in a more unstructured manner than during the school year,
it's just so important that we have those conversations. But
(08:35):
we also have a blueprint for safety on our super
Smarter Families dot org website that families can go on
every single day to check out and learn how to
navigate some of those conversations.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
A few more minutes here with former Florida State Senator
Lauren Books. She's a child abuse survivor advocate, and she
founded the nonprofit named Lauren's Kids to educate families and
protect kids. A lot of people who might not be
aware of how how prevalent this is might think, well,
this is only girls that are being targeted. More and
more we're seeing boys specifically targeted with sextortion cases, and
(09:09):
there have been numerous cases where we've seen young boys
take their own lives over this explain exactly what sextortion
is and how it works.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
Absolutely so. I think that people are familiar with the
scams that used to exist where I'm trapped in this
and I need you to send me X amount of
dollars here. I'm trapped over here. You know, I'm an
AFP and I can't get out. What we find happening
is people creating accounts, posing as young girls or young boys,
(09:41):
ingratiating themselves, grooming children really by identifying certain things that
children post online unwittingly, right like where they go to school,
their favorite sports teams. They start talking and engaging, whether
it's on a gaming system or others that exists, whether
that's roadblocks or break you know, and they're talking, they
(10:02):
build a relationship. They build that rapport. Hey, I'll send
you a picture of me if you send me a
picture of you. They send a picture that obviously is
not them. The young individual sends a photo back and
then they know they have them. And in this case
that I was referring to, referring to before and that
you have alluded to, there was a young boy who
(10:24):
took his life after the person said, if you don't
pay me, you know, a thousand dollars, we're going to
tell your family. And they know who the families are
because they this is what they do. And the Internet
footprint allows for them to gain that information very easily.
And children, instead of knowing that they can go and
(10:45):
talk to a family member or go get help from
a trusted adult, they take their take matters into their
own hands because they are so scared. And so we
really do want and there have been countless, countless cases
of this, as you you know, said Manny, and and
we want parents to have those conversations with kids. No
one understands that mistakes happen, but come to me, don't
(11:07):
be afraid to talk to me about what those Don't
take extreme measures into your own hands. No matter how
big or small the situation, we can solve it together.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
And that's obviously the key to all of this is
having that open conversation with your kids, isn't it absolutely?
Speaker 3 (11:25):
I mean, as you said, and it starts not with
these types of conversations necessarily right, but it's whether your
kids are having a bad dream, a fight with a friend,
or a touch that makes them feel not quite right.
Knowing that they can trust you and talk to you
about anything, they will feel more comfortable to have these conversations.
And again, we do live in a digital world. It's
(11:45):
not realistic to think that children won't make some of
these mistakes, or that we as adults, by the way,
don't make these mistakes because we do. These things happen,
but we want children to no one understand that we
are trusted people in their lives every single day that
can help them.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Safer Smarterfamilies dot org is the one website you could
go to Safer Smarterfamilies dot org or Lauren's Kids dot org. Lauren,
you've obviously been very open about your history of being
a victim. What are some of those signs that as
a parent we would need to watch out for if
something has happened to our child, or if something is
(12:23):
happening to our child but they haven't come to us
to discuss it.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Absolutely you know, a marked difference in that child's demeanor.
If you had a gregarious, happy, easygoing child who is
now withdrawn and not acting themselves or having outsized emotional
reactions to things, those are some signs that something may
not be right. If they have gifts that you did
(12:48):
not purchase for them, money that they have access to
that you did not give them, things that seem out
of place, If they have relationships or that they once
had relationships with certain individuals and now those individuals don't
feel safe. Those are signs that something is not quite right.
If a child is self mutilating, if they have a
(13:10):
different a different interaction with food than they used to have,
those are all signs that something may not be quite right.
And to have some of those conversations about some of
those things that might be happening. But also look at
the individuals in your child's life where you may see
or find something that isn't quite right. So there are
lots of different signs to look for as an adult.
(13:33):
But again those check ins, how you doing, what's going on?
But again, you have kids that are in and around
my kid's age. We raid the gamut, right, So sometimes
kids can just be having a bad day. But again
it's hey, are you okay? What's going on? Why don't
you feel comfortable hanging out with X or Y? I
normally didn't have a problem, or hey, you seem real
(13:55):
withdrawn today? As everything okay. It may not be a
an issue of childhood sexual abuse or somebody harming them,
but just you know, someone's being not so kind at
camp or at school. These are things that you show
your children you are a trusted person in their life,
that you care about their well being, that you care
about them as people, and that they will feel more
(14:18):
comfortable to come to you anytime a situation may arise.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Yeah, and it could be anybody. It could be somebody
they don't know online who's targeting them, or friend, family member,
a cousin of a friend or family member, a neighbor.
Last thing for you, So, if a parent discovers a
child may be involved in something likes sextortion, cyber exploitation,
I guess I imagine the advice is not to try
and pretend to play to catch a predator on your own.
(14:43):
What should they do?
Speaker 3 (14:45):
They should reach out to local law enforcement immediately. Law
enforcement will be able to help them. And in these cases,
you know, Manny, these are miners, and so law enforcement
is the best person to reach out to immediately to
be able to get them hel well. When a parent,
if a parent does receive news like this from a child,
whether it's childhood sexualies or a sex soortion situation is occurring,
(15:08):
don't have emotion large emotional reactions. Try and remain as
comment as possible. Let them know that you're so thankful
that they came to tell you and then reach out
to the foundation where we are able to connect you
with services wherever you are throughout the country to make
sure that people get the resources that they need, because
this doesn't just affect one person in a family, it
(15:31):
affects the entire dynamic, and so we're happy to help
with referrals anywhere that they may need it.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Smarter Safer Families dot org or Lauren's Kids dot org.
She's former Florida State Senator Lauren Book. Appreciate the time.
Thank you for everything you're doing and trying to make
sure that our kids stay safe and we stay inform.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Lauren be well, thanks man, you too, see you soon.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Raising kids is the most important and most difficult job
any of us will ever do, and it doesn't get
any easier or the older they get. And these days
they're getting older, if you will, faster than Ever's discuss
the early onset of puberty and what we as parents
can do to help. So we bring in renowned clinical psychologists,
doctor Cheryl Ziegler on her new book The Crucial Years,
(16:15):
Doctor z I appreciate the time.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Oh thanks so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
I can't count how many times I've had this conversation
over the years as an adult and now as a father,
that kids these days are absolutely going through puberty much
faster than we might of his kids forty or fifty
years ago. Why is that happening.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
There's a couple of reasons why we think it's happening.
There's not one solid, but we know that increase of
stress that brings puberty on earlier. We know that obesity.
We have an obesity epidemic among kids that can trigger puberty.
And we know that the booths that we eat and
our environmental toxins disrupt our hormonal system. And so we
(16:58):
see kids going through so kind of all of those
things at one time, and we're seeing an entire generation
of kids going through earlier puberty, and so.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
That creates a whole series of problems. Right, let's talk
about them. Because their bodies are aging faster, their bodies
are going through puberty, but their minds are still little kids,
they're still younger. Going through puberty hard enough when you're
doing it at an earlier age. I imagine that creates
a whole series of problems.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
There really are, and I think it could really overwhelm
parents if I listed all of them. Sure, because it
is over it's overwhelming, But I will say that when
I was really studying this and what are the outcomes,
we certainly see negative outcomes in boys as well, but
girls are hit even harder. And some of the things
that we see when a girl goes through puberty earlier
(17:48):
is higher rates of depression, anxiety, substance use, eating disorders,
and just a real poor body image. So going through
that stage of just feeling so incredibly uncomfortable in her
own body while maybe other kids around her still look
like younger kids. Yeah, and what happens is, you know,
(18:09):
society then, whether that's teachers, parents, other adults, they start
treating the kids older. They start expecting things of them,
and so it's almost like their childhood is cut short
because they don't get an opportunity to just play and
be a kid, because subtly the world says, okay, now
start acting older because you look older, So start acting older,
(18:30):
start being interested in you know, boys, start being more sexualized,
and I think we really have to stop this.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Society obviously playing a big role in this. What part
does that and social media and all of that play
into this.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
Well, when you have the world sort of saying things like,
you know, on the one hand, oh you're so you're
so tall, you do you play basketball? Do you play volleyball?
Or you're such a big kid, do you play football?
You start? You know, or like oh the girls better
watch out, You're gonna be breaking some hearts. Right, you
say those things. And even when we say those things,
(19:07):
that's just sexualizing, Right, what do you mean by breaking hearts? Well,
it means journalize them. They're like you and you're gonna,
you know, hurt people because you're so atractive. And so
what that does is a kid, they're so awkward at
this time, they feel so uncomfortable. So sometimes there's that disconnect,
like the world is saying this one thing, but I
feel really uncomfortable. And so there's that piece for kids
(19:28):
where inside they've got this piece around them just saying like,
I'm not living up to expectations. I'm confused about what
the world expects of me and wants for me. And
that's why we see this long list of high risk
and cautionary tales about what happens when a kid goes
through puberty earlier. And so you know, it's something that
(19:49):
I think is overlapping in middle childhood. Middle childhood is
like six to twelve. This used to be a true
adolescent kind of issue, right twelve and up. But now
this is nine, nine, ten year olds that are dealing
with this.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
And it's not only that because obviously I remember when
I was in what we used to call junior high school.
When I was in school, there was really one girl
that was developed, if you will, in eighth or ninth grade.
Now you're seeing that in elementary schools. How how many
years younger are we seeing, especially girls begin to go
(20:22):
through through puberty then we did, you know, twenty thirty
years ago.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Yeah, twenty thirty years ago. We're seeing kids about on
average two years earlier, and when you're this young, that's
a lot earlier. If we look all the way back
to like the late eighteen hundreds, early nineteen hundred, we're
a five years earlier now. So this is a significant
shift in human development, particularly again on girls. And exactly
(20:46):
like you just said, whoever you're thinking of in junior
high you probably like actually still remember her because she
stood out, you know, And now, like you said, this
is a fourth grade topic. You know, girls are talking
about wearing and who has their period, and by fifth
grade we've got a little significant amount of girls that
are already menstruating. They're already in sexual development, and yet
(21:09):
their minds emotionally are still their chronological age. They're still
nine and ten years old, but yet their bodies are
developing faster. So the disconnect has a lot of a
lot of four outcomes that I think parents need to
be educated on well.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
And not only do parents need to be educated of
the outcomes, it also leads us to having to have
that conversation, which for many parents, let's face it is
not an easy one about the birds and the bees.
If girls, boys as well are developing as eight and
nine year olds, we need to consider having those conversations
not only at a younger age, but also in a
(21:46):
way that somebody who's only eight or nine year old
can understand.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
Yes, I love that you highlight that I talk about
that in the crucial years, because I provide scripts, because
I do understand how long comfortable it can be for
many parents. And that's exactly right. We have to right now.
First of all, in this country we have every state
is very very different on even if they mandate sex,
then that can be at different ages and different grades,
(22:16):
and it's not mandated and most staken, and as a
matter of fact, there are a whole group of states
that are saying, you know, we're not even going to
talk about this till fifth grade. And I understand that
we all want to protect kids, but there are ways
I think that we can start having these conversations at
the ages we actually need to be having them, which
really is about second and third grade. And you know,
(22:36):
it doesn't have to be scary. You don't have to
go straight, you know, from second grades to talking about
sex and sexual reproduction. But you want to talk about
how puberty starts in the brain and what does that
look like. That means you might get moody feelings and
sometimes you might be angry and you might cry. You
might not understand that, and eventually we're going to see
it on the outside. Your body's going to change. And
(22:56):
so I provide all these ways that parents can do this,
and I promise I think if they read the way
that I put it, it doesn't feel as scary, and
you're kind of just building up and going at the
pace that not just your kids developing, but all the
kids around them are developing.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
A few more minutes here with doctor Cheryl Ziggler on
her book The Crucial Years, The Essential Guide to Mental
Health and Modern puberty in middle childhood. How is that
conversation different with girls and boys in this day and age.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
Yeah, it is different. I mean the timing can be
a little different in terms of, you know, girls are
advancing about a year earlier than boys, and you know
that's always been that way, but of course we're talking younger,
so got to do it a little earlier with girls,
you could do a little later with boys. I think
another shift is that we're now seeing that it benefits
both boys and girls to understand what each other's bodies
(23:50):
are changing, how their brains are changing. It used to
be just here, boys, this is what you need to know,
but now it's thought to be, you know, more helpful
for boys to understand with girls going through and vice versa.
And we also have social media and we have to
talk about screens and technology and greater pressures that kids
are feeling that we absolutely never even could have conceived
(24:12):
when we were that age.
Speaker 2 (24:14):
Yeah, and I think back to girls having a good
or bad self image themselves when I was growing up.
You throw in the social media, and I've heard it myself.
You know, seven eight nine year olds already displaying signs
of having poor self image because of what they see
on social media.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
Absolutely they have poor self image. We're seeing disordered eating
happening in this category of kids, where that was, you know,
something that would have been incredibly rare. So if they
think they have to meet some sort of beauty idea,
I mean, we see this on a practical level. Right
in the last couple of years, We've been talking about
all these little girls going to Sephora, going to get
(24:57):
certain facial products that they don't need. And we see
they're following influencers on YouTube. They want to buke up,
they want to be tall, muscular and strong. And you
could argue, okay, there is always sometimes we'd say, like
the Gi Joe effect for another generation. Sure, yeah, that
maybe that was that was always be ideal. But now
(25:18):
it's not sort of Gi Joe a character. Now it's
like a serious a person that they follow, that's a
real person that's telling you every single thing they eat,
how much protein they have, how much weights they lift.
And we have our boys now also having there's this
new term kind of called big eurexia where they are
so determined to be big and strong, they're taking creatine,
(25:39):
they're lifting weights, maybe a little bit younger than they
should really be doing. So it has really serious affects
on boys too, in just sort of different ways, but
all having to do with self image and body image.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
Okay, so different different issues with each sex. Clearly that
makes perfect sense. How does a parent address us? How
do we address those things because there's so much to
carry on, more than we've ever had to as parents.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
Yeah, I think there's a couple of things. Number one,
it always starts with communication, and as simple and straightforward
as that sounds, we have a very busy, distracted world
in which sometimes you go, oh my god, I didn't
even talk to my kid about that. So I think
make the time. Make sure you're asking your kid, you know, hey,
what are you looking at? Show me some of the videos.
When they want to show you things that you're looking at,
(26:30):
let them right, like, let them show you, take a
couple of minutes and watch it. I think also we
have to be the educator. So I mentioned you know,
sex said and have that, you know really different in
different states than schools, sure, but everything starts in the home.
Right this is these are the years of opportunity. Between
five and five and twelve thirteen, you have the opportunity
(26:51):
where you really are you as a parent, the greatest
influence over your kid. But after this, if we don't
do what we need to do, if we don't teach
them and show them our morals and our values and
all those kinds of things, what happens is the next
years after these are the crucial years, meaning these are
sort of the years they build their self esteem. But
what follows this are the identity years. And identity is like, Okay,
(27:16):
now I'm thirteen fourteen, I sort of think I know
who I am, and now I'm going to seek out
other people and other experiences that reinforce that. Well, if
you don't know, if your kid doesn't know what they're
good at, that's really what the point is, right What am.
Speaker 3 (27:29):
I good at?
Speaker 1 (27:29):
What do I think of myself?
Speaker 2 (27:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (27:31):
If they don't know that, that's where we see the
problems in those teen years. So I really want parents
to hear any of these things that sound scary overwhelming.
You have the greatest influence in teaching them. Right now, I.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Think we could all understand a mom's role in guiding
a young girl through the beginning of puberty and the
changes she'll experience. Same for a father with a son.
What about a father with a daughter and a mother
with a son. What roles do they play?
Speaker 1 (27:59):
Yeah, I mean I think, you know, when we look
at today's American family, first of all, there's not there's
there's not like every home has mother, father and children.
We have a lot of single moms raising kids, and
so I think, you know, both moms and dads need
to be really comfortable talking to either of their daughter
or son about what's going on. I know it's more
comfortable you know, usually father to son and mother to daughter,
(28:22):
but it doesn't always work out that way, whether there's
not two parents in the home or just a parent's
not comfortable. So I think that the more we normalize it,
it's just like mental health. So we used to never
talk about mental health. We didn't talk about PTSD or
depression or anxiety. We didn't those aren't things that were
like you know, cocktail kind of part of the stigma exactly.
(28:45):
And that's how I see puberty and all of these changes.
It's like the more you kind of go oh yeah,
you know, son, when you're this age, you're you know,
you're you're a hustanding That's called a direction. And you
may have heard that, and yeah, the kid might giggle
and left. I think I need to be comfortable having
that conversation, so does mom. And the more that we
talk about these things and we just say it matter
(29:07):
of fact and we're not uncomfortable, this is how we
take the stigma out and we actually educate kids right
around their bodies. Tonit.
Speaker 3 (29:13):
This is health.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
This is like a health talk. So it's I think
we just have to start talking about it with ease.
And I provide in the book a lot of scripts
to kick people off, like Okay, you could do this.
Look this is what it would sound like. So I
promise the more you do it, the more comfortable you
just get with it.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
The book is titled The Crucial Years, The Essential Guide
to Mental Health and Modern Puberty in Middle Childhood by
doctor Cheryl Ziggler doctor Z as she's known, doctor, Really
appreciate the time, Thanks so much for sharing.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
It, Thanks much for having me.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
And that'll do it. For another edition of Iheartradios Communities.
I'm Manny Wuno's until next time
Speaker 1 (30:00):
M
Welcome to iHeartRadio Communities, a public affairs special focusing on
the biggest issues in facting you this week.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Here's many Munnos and welcome to another edition of Iheartradios Communities.
As you heard, I am Manny Muno's. Sometimes the headlines,
the stories get lost in the noise and the clutter
of our media landscape. But kids in our country are
being targeted incessantly by those looking to exploit them assault, abuse, rape, kidnapping, sextortion,
(00:34):
and more. Well, June is Internet Safety Month, so let's
discuss how kids are targeted and how we could protect them.
So we bring in Lauren Books. She's a former Florida
State senator, a child abuse survivor and advocate who founded
a nonprofit named Lauren's Kids to educate families and protect kids.
Lauren always appreciates some time. Thanks for joining us.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
Oh my goodness, thank you so much for having me.
I'm going to travel around with you every day.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Well, I appreciate you talking to us because part of
the reason I wanted to do this. Kids these days
are growing up in a completely different environment than you
did and absolutely than I did, and it all has
to do with social media and the digital fingerprint, whether
it's YouTube kids or roadblocks or TikTok things like that,
and that's the open door into the kids.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
Absolutely. I mean listen, first of all, thank you so
much for having me and for having these conversations. I
think it's so important for your listeners to to no
one understands the things that are happening, and listen. I'm
a mom, and I keep it as real as I
possibly can. I think that you know, it's the summertime
and kids are on their tablets, maybe more than they
are during the regular school year with some of that
(01:44):
extra structure. It's how we survive. But and in that
same vein, we want to make sure that that families
are having these conversations, that parents understand that there are
real practical steps that they can take to make sure
that their children are being safe on line and that
they're exercising caution when using digital devices. It's important to
(02:07):
know that one out of every five children that touch
a digital device, regardless of their gender, are going to
be solicited for sex online. But it's a very real
piece of our world that children interface with technology every
all day. But there are things that families can do
every single day to keep their children much safer if
you think about it this way. I have two eight
(02:27):
year old children. I would never just drop them off
at the mall at eight o'clock in the morning and
say see at three, I love some money on some
gift cards. We wouldn't do that. But while your children
are sitting right now in your living room, or in
their bedrooms or in their kitchen, if they're on their devices,
it's the same thing if you're not monitoring some of
the things they're doing, and you don't have some of
(02:48):
those conversations as a family. So I'm really excited to
talk about ways to keep children safe online.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
How is it you mentioned one in five kids is
going to be sexually solicited online. It's hard to imagine
that that number is that high. How is it that
these these pedophiles others targeting them make that contact with
the kids?
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Well, I mean, well, we think about you know, social
media and different platform usage, whether TikTok you mentioned, or
Instagram and in those typical ways. But I would tell
you roadblocks minecraft gaming systems are a way that predators
seek to harm our children. I would encourage all families
to have lots of conversations about safe usage on those
(03:35):
apps and platforms. But I would also say that parents
really do need to get on the apps. I know
that I'm one of those doom scrollers, but I should
It's part of my emotional regulation at the end of
the day. But I think that the reality is that
parents do need to get on the apps that your
children are on. No one understand the different restrictions that
(03:58):
exist on a lot of the different platforms. You can
limit some of the people that they can interface with
or talk to at all, and I would encourage them
to do that. But more than that, it's not just
setting different limits on the apps and different things that
your children can do. It's establishing a code of conduct
for your children to be online safely. Just like you
(04:21):
have conversations about being a safe citizen in our real life.
In real life in our community, we want children to
have a code of conduct for how they should behave online.
They don't give out personal identifying information, they don't post
pictures without permission, and if they do post pictures with
your permission, that you, as the adult in their life,
(04:42):
are checking to make sure that logos aren't on t
shirts or after collectivities are easily identifiable location is turned off,
so that there are real serious boundaries around how they
share in the digital world. We also encourage family to
have a written safety agreement with children who are online,
(05:03):
so that everybody knows and understands what exists, how it exists,
and why we do the thing that we do. I
also think that really it's important, as we talked about,
to limit some of the things that they're doing on
the apps themselves, but as parents, we need to audit
that often. I tell my children every day on their iPads,
I own this iPad. I can go on this iPad
(05:25):
and don't do anything that you don't want me to
see or say anything you don't want me to see.
But as parents, we need to check that out, We
need to look at it, we need to continue to
monitor it. Don't think that they don't know the codes,
because they do, but make sure that you're regularly auditing them.
But again, also talk openly about the dangers of the
(05:46):
digital world with your children. Let them know one understand
that people who they babies are talking to online may
not be the people that they think that they are,
and really have some of those open and honest conversations
because those are really important, loving conversations to have. And
if children do mess up and they share something that
they shouldn't or there's a really unfortunate situation. We see
(06:10):
a lot of sex stortion right now. At the foundation
that they come to you, that they feel safe enough
to come to you, that you can help them solve
any problem. We just had a case not too long
ago where unfortunately a mom has lost her son committed
suicide after a situation of sex stortion. It's happening every day.
It's a reality of our world, and we can do
(06:32):
more and have some of those conversations, just like we
do to prevent childhood sexual abuse. Those are the same
conversations we need to have around the internet because we
live in a digital world. There's no way to have
an abstinence abstinence mind when it comes to the inner interwebs,
the interwebs right.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
The website, by the way, if you want to get
more information, is Laurenskids dot org. Laurens Kids dot org.
You talk about kids are going to be connected these day?
Speaker 1 (07:00):
Is right?
Speaker 2 (07:00):
If we take away the electronics, it almost feels like
as a parent, we're punishing ourselves. One of the rules
we have in my house and I've got nine and
eleven year olds. You're not using your iPad in your bedroom,
You're using it out in the living or the family room.
So at least you're surrounded by people, and you're right,
you do have to monitor what they're doing. It is
your iPad at all times, and you could go on
(07:22):
there and see what they're doing, or their history or
anything else. And I don't think enough parents do that.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
I think that that's one of those things where we
think that our children are entitled to some level of privacy,
but not when it comes to these things. You know,
there are different apps that you can use, whether it's
Kids Messenger or others where the text messits are coming
directly to you. But again, the reality of this is
having open and honest communication with your children. Letting them know,
(07:52):
I am going to check, I'm gonna look, I'm going
to know, you know, the snapchats, all of those things.
We have to engage with those two. Understand what our
kids are doing and they are growing up in a
digital world, and so also letting them know that, you know,
the truth of the matter is likes or videos and
(08:13):
all of this does not equal, you know, reality right,
that that should not build their self esteem who and
what they are should do that there's lots of pieces
of parts to this that you know, during this month,
while kids are again engaging in technology, perhaps maybe more
and in a more unstructured manner than during the school year,
it's just so important that we have those conversations. But
(08:35):
we also have a blueprint for safety on our super
Smarter Families dot org website that families can go on
every single day to check out and learn how to
navigate some of those conversations.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
A few more minutes here with former Florida State Senator
Lauren Books. She's a child abuse survivor advocate, and she
founded the nonprofit named Lauren's Kids to educate families and
protect kids. A lot of people who might not be
aware of how how prevalent this is might think, well,
this is only girls that are being targeted. More and
more we're seeing boys specifically targeted with sextortion cases, and
(09:09):
there have been numerous cases where we've seen young boys
take their own lives over this explain exactly what sextortion
is and how it works.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
Absolutely so. I think that people are familiar with the
scams that used to exist where I'm trapped in this
and I need you to send me X amount of
dollars here. I'm trapped over here. You know, I'm an
AFP and I can't get out. What we find happening
is people creating accounts, posing as young girls or young boys,
(09:41):
ingratiating themselves, grooming children really by identifying certain things that
children post online unwittingly, right like where they go to school,
their favorite sports teams. They start talking and engaging, whether
it's on a gaming system or others that exists, whether
that's roadblocks or break you know, and they're talking, they
(10:02):
build a relationship. They build that rapport. Hey, I'll send
you a picture of me if you send me a
picture of you. They send a picture that obviously is
not them. The young individual sends a photo back and
then they know they have them. And in this case
that I was referring to, referring to before and that
you have alluded to, there was a young boy who
(10:24):
took his life after the person said, if you don't
pay me, you know, a thousand dollars, we're going to
tell your family. And they know who the families are
because they this is what they do. And the Internet
footprint allows for them to gain that information very easily.
And children, instead of knowing that they can go and
(10:45):
talk to a family member or go get help from
a trusted adult, they take their take matters into their
own hands because they are so scared. And so we
really do want and there have been countless, countless cases
of this, as you you know, said Manny, and and
we want parents to have those conversations with kids. No
one understands that mistakes happen, but come to me, don't
(11:07):
be afraid to talk to me about what those Don't
take extreme measures into your own hands. No matter how
big or small the situation, we can solve it together.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
And that's obviously the key to all of this is
having that open conversation with your kids, isn't it absolutely?
Speaker 3 (11:25):
I mean, as you said, and it starts not with
these types of conversations necessarily right, but it's whether your
kids are having a bad dream, a fight with a friend,
or a touch that makes them feel not quite right.
Knowing that they can trust you and talk to you
about anything, they will feel more comfortable to have these conversations.
And again, we do live in a digital world. It's
(11:45):
not realistic to think that children won't make some of
these mistakes, or that we as adults, by the way,
don't make these mistakes because we do. These things happen,
but we want children to no one understand that we
are trusted people in their lives every single day that
can help them.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Safer Smarterfamilies dot org is the one website you could
go to Safer Smarterfamilies dot org or Lauren's Kids dot org. Lauren,
you've obviously been very open about your history of being
a victim. What are some of those signs that as
a parent we would need to watch out for if
something has happened to our child, or if something is
(12:23):
happening to our child but they haven't come to us
to discuss it.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Absolutely you know, a marked difference in that child's demeanor.
If you had a gregarious, happy, easygoing child who is
now withdrawn and not acting themselves or having outsized emotional
reactions to things, those are some signs that something may
not be right. If they have gifts that you did
(12:48):
not purchase for them, money that they have access to
that you did not give them, things that seem out
of place, If they have relationships or that they once
had relationships with certain individuals and now those individuals don't
feel safe. Those are signs that something is not quite right.
If a child is self mutilating, if they have a
(13:10):
different a different interaction with food than they used to have,
those are all signs that something may not be quite right.
And to have some of those conversations about some of
those things that might be happening. But also look at
the individuals in your child's life where you may see
or find something that isn't quite right. So there are
lots of different signs to look for as an adult.
(13:33):
But again those check ins, how you doing, what's going on?
But again, you have kids that are in and around
my kid's age. We raid the gamut, right, So sometimes
kids can just be having a bad day. But again
it's hey, are you okay? What's going on? Why don't
you feel comfortable hanging out with X or Y? I
normally didn't have a problem, or hey, you seem real
(13:55):
withdrawn today? As everything okay. It may not be a
an issue of childhood sexual abuse or somebody harming them,
but just you know, someone's being not so kind at
camp or at school. These are things that you show
your children you are a trusted person in their life,
that you care about their well being, that you care
about them as people, and that they will feel more
(14:18):
comfortable to come to you anytime a situation may arise.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Yeah, and it could be anybody. It could be somebody
they don't know online who's targeting them, or friend, family member,
a cousin of a friend or family member, a neighbor.
Last thing for you, So, if a parent discovers a
child may be involved in something likes sextortion, cyber exploitation,
I guess I imagine the advice is not to try
and pretend to play to catch a predator on your own.
(14:43):
What should they do?
Speaker 3 (14:45):
They should reach out to local law enforcement immediately. Law
enforcement will be able to help them. And in these cases,
you know, Manny, these are miners, and so law enforcement
is the best person to reach out to immediately to
be able to get them hel well. When a parent,
if a parent does receive news like this from a child,
whether it's childhood sexualies or a sex soortion situation is occurring,
(15:08):
don't have emotion large emotional reactions. Try and remain as
comment as possible. Let them know that you're so thankful
that they came to tell you and then reach out
to the foundation where we are able to connect you
with services wherever you are throughout the country to make
sure that people get the resources that they need, because
this doesn't just affect one person in a family, it
(15:31):
affects the entire dynamic, and so we're happy to help
with referrals anywhere that they may need it.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Smarter Safer Families dot org or Lauren's Kids dot org.
She's former Florida State Senator Lauren Book. Appreciate the time.
Thank you for everything you're doing and trying to make
sure that our kids stay safe and we stay inform.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Lauren be well, thanks man, you too, see you soon.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Raising kids is the most important and most difficult job
any of us will ever do, and it doesn't get
any easier or the older they get. And these days
they're getting older, if you will, faster than Ever's discuss
the early onset of puberty and what we as parents
can do to help. So we bring in renowned clinical psychologists,
doctor Cheryl Ziegler on her new book The Crucial Years,
(16:15):
Doctor z I appreciate the time.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Oh thanks so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
I can't count how many times I've had this conversation
over the years as an adult and now as a father,
that kids these days are absolutely going through puberty much
faster than we might of his kids forty or fifty
years ago. Why is that happening.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
There's a couple of reasons why we think it's happening.
There's not one solid, but we know that increase of
stress that brings puberty on earlier. We know that obesity.
We have an obesity epidemic among kids that can trigger puberty.
And we know that the booths that we eat and
our environmental toxins disrupt our hormonal system. And so we
(16:58):
see kids going through so kind of all of those
things at one time, and we're seeing an entire generation
of kids going through earlier puberty, and so.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
That creates a whole series of problems. Right, let's talk
about them. Because their bodies are aging faster, their bodies
are going through puberty, but their minds are still little kids,
they're still younger. Going through puberty hard enough when you're
doing it at an earlier age. I imagine that creates
a whole series of problems.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
There really are, and I think it could really overwhelm
parents if I listed all of them. Sure, because it
is over it's overwhelming, But I will say that when
I was really studying this and what are the outcomes,
we certainly see negative outcomes in boys as well, but
girls are hit even harder. And some of the things
that we see when a girl goes through puberty earlier
(17:48):
is higher rates of depression, anxiety, substance use, eating disorders,
and just a real poor body image. So going through
that stage of just feeling so incredibly uncomfortable in her
own body while maybe other kids around her still look
like younger kids. Yeah, and what happens is, you know,
(18:09):
society then, whether that's teachers, parents, other adults, they start
treating the kids older. They start expecting things of them,
and so it's almost like their childhood is cut short
because they don't get an opportunity to just play and
be a kid, because subtly the world says, okay, now
start acting older because you look older, So start acting older,
(18:30):
start being interested in you know, boys, start being more sexualized,
and I think we really have to stop this.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Society obviously playing a big role in this. What part
does that and social media and all of that play
into this.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
Well, when you have the world sort of saying things like,
you know, on the one hand, oh you're so you're
so tall, you do you play basketball? Do you play volleyball?
Or you're such a big kid, do you play football?
You start? You know, or like oh the girls better
watch out, You're gonna be breaking some hearts. Right, you
say those things. And even when we say those things,
(19:07):
that's just sexualizing, Right, what do you mean by breaking hearts? Well,
it means journalize them. They're like you and you're gonna,
you know, hurt people because you're so atractive. And so
what that does is a kid, they're so awkward at
this time, they feel so uncomfortable. So sometimes there's that disconnect,
like the world is saying this one thing, but I
feel really uncomfortable. And so there's that piece for kids
(19:28):
where inside they've got this piece around them just saying like,
I'm not living up to expectations. I'm confused about what
the world expects of me and wants for me. And
that's why we see this long list of high risk
and cautionary tales about what happens when a kid goes
through puberty earlier. And so you know, it's something that
(19:49):
I think is overlapping in middle childhood. Middle childhood is
like six to twelve. This used to be a true
adolescent kind of issue, right twelve and up. But now
this is nine, nine, ten year olds that are dealing
with this.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
And it's not only that because obviously I remember when
I was in what we used to call junior high school.
When I was in school, there was really one girl
that was developed, if you will, in eighth or ninth grade.
Now you're seeing that in elementary schools. How how many
years younger are we seeing, especially girls begin to go
(20:22):
through through puberty then we did, you know, twenty thirty
years ago.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Yeah, twenty thirty years ago. We're seeing kids about on
average two years earlier, and when you're this young, that's
a lot earlier. If we look all the way back
to like the late eighteen hundreds, early nineteen hundred, we're
a five years earlier now. So this is a significant
shift in human development, particularly again on girls. And exactly
(20:46):
like you just said, whoever you're thinking of in junior
high you probably like actually still remember her because she
stood out, you know, And now, like you said, this
is a fourth grade topic. You know, girls are talking
about wearing and who has their period, and by fifth
grade we've got a little significant amount of girls that
are already menstruating. They're already in sexual development, and yet
(21:09):
their minds emotionally are still their chronological age. They're still
nine and ten years old, but yet their bodies are
developing faster. So the disconnect has a lot of a
lot of four outcomes that I think parents need to
be educated on well.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
And not only do parents need to be educated of
the outcomes, it also leads us to having to have
that conversation, which for many parents, let's face it is
not an easy one about the birds and the bees.
If girls, boys as well are developing as eight and
nine year olds, we need to consider having those conversations
not only at a younger age, but also in a
(21:46):
way that somebody who's only eight or nine year old
can understand.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
Yes, I love that you highlight that I talk about
that in the crucial years, because I provide scripts, because
I do understand how long comfortable it can be for
many parents. And that's exactly right. We have to right now.
First of all, in this country we have every state
is very very different on even if they mandate sex,
then that can be at different ages and different grades,
(22:16):
and it's not mandated and most staken, and as a
matter of fact, there are a whole group of states
that are saying, you know, we're not even going to
talk about this till fifth grade. And I understand that
we all want to protect kids, but there are ways
I think that we can start having these conversations at
the ages we actually need to be having them, which
really is about second and third grade. And you know,
(22:36):
it doesn't have to be scary. You don't have to
go straight, you know, from second grades to talking about
sex and sexual reproduction. But you want to talk about
how puberty starts in the brain and what does that
look like. That means you might get moody feelings and
sometimes you might be angry and you might cry. You
might not understand that, and eventually we're going to see
it on the outside. Your body's going to change. And
(22:56):
so I provide all these ways that parents can do this,
and I promise I think if they read the way
that I put it, it doesn't feel as scary, and
you're kind of just building up and going at the
pace that not just your kids developing, but all the
kids around them are developing.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
A few more minutes here with doctor Cheryl Ziggler on
her book The Crucial Years, The Essential Guide to Mental
Health and Modern puberty in middle childhood. How is that
conversation different with girls and boys in this day and age.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
Yeah, it is different. I mean the timing can be
a little different in terms of, you know, girls are
advancing about a year earlier than boys, and you know
that's always been that way, but of course we're talking younger,
so got to do it a little earlier with girls,
you could do a little later with boys. I think
another shift is that we're now seeing that it benefits
both boys and girls to understand what each other's bodies
(23:50):
are changing, how their brains are changing. It used to
be just here, boys, this is what you need to know,
but now it's thought to be, you know, more helpful
for boys to understand with girls going through and vice versa.
And we also have social media and we have to
talk about screens and technology and greater pressures that kids
are feeling that we absolutely never even could have conceived
(24:12):
when we were that age.
Speaker 2 (24:14):
Yeah, and I think back to girls having a good
or bad self image themselves when I was growing up.
You throw in the social media, and I've heard it myself.
You know, seven eight nine year olds already displaying signs
of having poor self image because of what they see
on social media.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
Absolutely they have poor self image. We're seeing disordered eating
happening in this category of kids, where that was, you know,
something that would have been incredibly rare. So if they
think they have to meet some sort of beauty idea,
I mean, we see this on a practical level. Right
in the last couple of years, We've been talking about
all these little girls going to Sephora, going to get
(24:57):
certain facial products that they don't need. And we see
they're following influencers on YouTube. They want to buke up,
they want to be tall, muscular and strong. And you
could argue, okay, there is always sometimes we'd say, like
the Gi Joe effect for another generation. Sure, yeah, that
maybe that was that was always be ideal. But now
(25:18):
it's not sort of Gi Joe a character. Now it's
like a serious a person that they follow, that's a
real person that's telling you every single thing they eat,
how much protein they have, how much weights they lift.
And we have our boys now also having there's this
new term kind of called big eurexia where they are
so determined to be big and strong, they're taking creatine,
(25:39):
they're lifting weights, maybe a little bit younger than they
should really be doing. So it has really serious affects
on boys too, in just sort of different ways, but
all having to do with self image and body image.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
Okay, so different different issues with each sex. Clearly that
makes perfect sense. How does a parent address us? How
do we address those things because there's so much to
carry on, more than we've ever had to as parents.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
Yeah, I think there's a couple of things. Number one,
it always starts with communication, and as simple and straightforward
as that sounds, we have a very busy, distracted world
in which sometimes you go, oh my god, I didn't
even talk to my kid about that. So I think
make the time. Make sure you're asking your kid, you know, hey,
what are you looking at? Show me some of the videos.
When they want to show you things that you're looking at,
(26:30):
let them right, like, let them show you, take a
couple of minutes and watch it. I think also we
have to be the educator. So I mentioned you know,
sex said and have that, you know really different in
different states than schools, sure, but everything starts in the home.
Right this is these are the years of opportunity. Between
five and five and twelve thirteen, you have the opportunity
(26:51):
where you really are you as a parent, the greatest
influence over your kid. But after this, if we don't
do what we need to do, if we don't teach
them and show them our morals and our values and
all those kinds of things, what happens is the next
years after these are the crucial years, meaning these are
sort of the years they build their self esteem. But
what follows this are the identity years. And identity is like, Okay,
(27:16):
now I'm thirteen fourteen, I sort of think I know
who I am, and now I'm going to seek out
other people and other experiences that reinforce that. Well, if
you don't know, if your kid doesn't know what they're
good at, that's really what the point is, right What am.
Speaker 3 (27:29):
I good at?
Speaker 1 (27:29):
What do I think of myself?
Speaker 2 (27:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (27:31):
If they don't know that, that's where we see the
problems in those teen years. So I really want parents
to hear any of these things that sound scary overwhelming.
You have the greatest influence in teaching them. Right now, I.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Think we could all understand a mom's role in guiding
a young girl through the beginning of puberty and the
changes she'll experience. Same for a father with a son.
What about a father with a daughter and a mother
with a son. What roles do they play?
Speaker 1 (27:59):
Yeah, I mean I think, you know, when we look
at today's American family, first of all, there's not there's
there's not like every home has mother, father and children.
We have a lot of single moms raising kids, and
so I think, you know, both moms and dads need
to be really comfortable talking to either of their daughter
or son about what's going on. I know it's more
comfortable you know, usually father to son and mother to daughter,
(28:22):
but it doesn't always work out that way, whether there's
not two parents in the home or just a parent's
not comfortable. So I think that the more we normalize it,
it's just like mental health. So we used to never
talk about mental health. We didn't talk about PTSD or
depression or anxiety. We didn't those aren't things that were
like you know, cocktail kind of part of the stigma exactly.
(28:45):
And that's how I see puberty and all of these changes.
It's like the more you kind of go oh yeah,
you know, son, when you're this age, you're you know,
you're you're a hustanding That's called a direction. And you
may have heard that, and yeah, the kid might giggle
and left. I think I need to be comfortable having
that conversation, so does mom. And the more that we
talk about these things and we just say it matter
(29:07):
of fact and we're not uncomfortable, this is how we
take the stigma out and we actually educate kids right
around their bodies. Tonit.
Speaker 3 (29:13):
This is health.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
This is like a health talk. So it's I think
we just have to start talking about it with ease.
And I provide in the book a lot of scripts
to kick people off, like Okay, you could do this.
Look this is what it would sound like. So I
promise the more you do it, the more comfortable you
just get with it.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
The book is titled The Crucial Years, The Essential Guide
to Mental Health and Modern Puberty in Middle Childhood by
doctor Cheryl Ziggler doctor Z as she's known, doctor, Really
appreciate the time, Thanks so much for sharing.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
It, Thanks much for having me.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
And that'll do it. For another edition of Iheartradios Communities.
I'm Manny Wuno's until next time
Speaker 1 (30:00):
M
Host
Manny Munoz
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