Episode 39 - Twilight - 14 Going On 40

Episode Transcript
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(00:02):
Oh my god, I don't evenknow how to start. Thus, ah,
so many thoughts. Okay, um, okay, Well how about Andrea,

(00:26):
what is your favorite book turned movie? My favorite book turned movie?
Oh, that's a hard one.There's so many what ends up happening though
I end up getting disappointed in themovie. I mean, I will say,

(00:48):
like, I feel like the HarryPotter series. I feel like they
did a really good adaptation of thatwhole series. So I guess that's gotta
be. I've been watching them nowbecause it's you know, it's Harry Potter
season in my house. This season, I'm up to like number four.
Um, so I think that Ilike the adaptation of that because the stuff

(01:12):
that I know, they change stuffand yeah, but I felt like it's
still very true to the to thestory. Yeah, I would agree.
I think it like enhanced it.It enhanced the book, like it didn't
have to be exactly the same forit to still be really good. Yeah.
Oh, I also liked, um, the devil Wares product. Oh

(01:34):
so you I've never read the devilWares product, but I love the movie
I did. It's fair. Imean, it's a memoir, so it's
very uh like a fictionalized well shecan't use like you know, you know
what I mean. Um, soI really enjoyed that one as well.
Um, I remember not liking Iread Midnight in the Garden of Good and

(01:57):
Evil, and I loved that book. It was great. It's one of
those I think I want to readagain because it's been so long, Like
I think I read it in maybehigh school or college, and I'd like
to revisit. And I remember seeingthe movie and everybody was raving about the
movie, but I just I couldn'tget behind it. That's another one where
I've never read the book. Sobut I did enjoy the movie, but

(02:20):
probably because I you know, Ihad nothing to compare it to. Yeah,
m so I was thinking about it, and I think that there's if
I really thought hard about this questionthere I could probably come up with a
decent sized list. But kind oflike off the top of my head.
I have been a pretty big fanof almost I think every adaptation to film

(02:45):
of Little Women. Oh, I'ma fan. I like, um the
Elizabeth Taylor is any one? Ilove the one with Christian Bale and Wanona
Writer And recently they actually did kindof like Made for TV movie esque of

(03:06):
it's called The March Sisters at Christmas, where they take a really modern take.
I tried to watch that. Icouldn't get through it. Oh I
thought that one was pretty cute.Now I can't. I have not been
able to get through the newest one. The newest one I started, and
their take on it was to takethe story and do a lot of like
time jumping, like you're flashing backand then coming back. And I'm like,

(03:30):
because like in the first twenty minutesof the movie, I'm like,
this is all things that happened atthe end of the story, so I'm
not sure what was happening here,and I was struggling so hard to get
bought in that. It's just likethat's the only one. But like the
other ones I've liked, I likedfor some reason. Drew and I we
like The March Sisters at Christmas.But it's cheesy and you have to go

(03:52):
into it with like this is likea homemark Lifetime movie. I mean,
I went into it like that,but I just I must not have been
in the right frame of mind.I try to watch that last year because
I was like, oh, like, this looks kind of cute, and
I was like, this acting ishorrendous, and I don't know is I
think part of it is. Yeah, I think part of it is that

(04:12):
for me, the character of Joehas to be the right person, and
in that cast, she's the onlyone that's right. Like the girl that's
playing Joe does Joe right. SoI can stick with it as long as
I'm focusing on her, the samething with like Winona Ryder does Joe right,
you know, like it like there'sreally good, Like then I can

(04:32):
handle it. So that one,and then you know, I think I
would totally agree on the Harry Potter. I mean, I have, you
know, in my house it's HarryPotter year round. So we use it
as like um, like comfort typeof movies where we you know, put

(04:57):
them on to fall asleep at nightbecause we've seen them so many times.
You can put the sleep timer onand it's okay. And so between that
and the audio books and then I'mhoping to get Audrey to the point where
like she'll be ready to read theactual books. But I know that it's
hard because they get more difficult asthey go on, because they were coming

(05:17):
out and like the kids who readthem were growing with it, so that
can be hard. Yeah, butso you know, yeah, I would
I would say I agree with that, and I think it'd be very interesting
to kind of come up with moreof a list of book at a book
adapted movies that where I have readthe book and can say whether or not
I liked it. I actually reallyliked Jurassic Park as an adaptation as well.

(05:42):
I thought it was very well donethe first one. The second one
was terrible. Well, it's apretty downhill situation. It's like you started
at the very crest and then justwrote it all the way into the pit
of Jurassic Park series. But youknow that happens. Welcome to fourteen going

(06:11):
on forty. This is Melissa andthis is Andrea, and we're two best
friends that met in high school andwe revisit movies made during the time that
we've known each other. And ontoday's episode, we are heading two Forks
High School in Washington to talk aboutthe movie Twilight, which let's just give

(06:31):
the quick logline from IMDb. WhenBella Swan moves to a small town in
the Pacific Northwest, she falls inlove with Edward Cullen, a mysterious classmate
who reveals himself to be a onehundred and eight year old vampire. This
is where they went on IMDb.They're not wrong. So the time it

(06:55):
came out was November twenty first,two thousand and eight. We worked twenty
nine. Uh huh. What doyou remember like about this movie coming out?
I remember the crazy ass middle agedwomen who had read the Twilight series
like foaming at the mouth for thismovie to come out. See. I

(07:19):
kind of feel like, I justremember there being a ton of people that
were so excited, like it was. It just seemed like wherever I was
running into it, they were talkingabout it whether it would be well,
maybe this two could because I wasa high school teacher, so I kind
of felt like it was definitely girlsthat you know, we're all talking about

(07:40):
Twilight, whether it be the highschool girls or you know, all the
way into adults and all that kindof thing. And it was right in
that crest of time where Harry Potterwas also coming out in movies and the
books, you know, we're stillbeing released. And I think for me,
what I thought that caught my Iwith it, all Right, well,

(08:01):
I'll go see this like Twilight movie, and I went to see the
movie in the theater and then Iread the books. It was my order
of operation. I think I didit the other way around because I think
everybody was saying over Twilight, readTwilight, re Twilight. I had a
client at the time, and itwas like every time she came in it
was like book club and she's like, oh, you should read it's it's
good. And I was like,all right, I'll read it. And

(08:24):
I read this series and I thoughtit was okay, like for a ya
like sure novel. I thought itwas okay. Um. I thought it
was way too teen angsty for me. And I think at the same time,
I was also reading, like theSookie Stackhouse series, which True Blood

(08:48):
was based on. So when youput those two next to each other,
it's like up, Like, Imean, Twilight is just no. I
mean the writing that great, thecharacters aren't great. I mean, it's
just okay. I mean I wouldsay I feel that way about both.

(09:09):
I think that there's some real there'ssome things to be desired with the Soilkie
Stackhouse books, like they kind ofthey and I think with both series it's
like they have strong elements, butthey're not. It's not all you know,
but what I think I liked aboutthis at the time, and you
know what, I could be confusing. So my sister, I remember her

(09:31):
and I both reading the books becauseI think she just went ahead and like
ordered them on Amazon, because I, yeah, she ordered an Amazon and
then she passed it to me,because I definitely didn't read it like in
an electronic version. I remember likeborrowing the book from her and I read
it or like I didn't do likean audiobook. And I think the thing

(09:54):
that I did find kind of cooland I could be a little forgiving about
was I wasn't anticipating that would beas good as Harry Potter. But it
was kind of in this like waveof people being excited and talking about books,
which it felt like it had beena really long time since I had

(10:15):
lived through like anybody, like it'son the news, people are talking about
the movie release, the premier party, like it's getting the hype and it's
a book, you know. SoI think that was part of what sort
of like attracted my eye. Butyes, I would agree, like it's
you definitely have to have that mindsetof like this is young adult fiction it's

(10:37):
going to have that feel to itfor sure, and I, you know,
it was interesting rewatching it this time. It was real interesting. So
I think I saw this. Ididn't see this one in the theater.
I might not have either. Ican't remember. I don't think I did.

(11:01):
I think I saw this like rentalat home or like something like that,
because I remember I remember just beinglike, oh my god, am
I like this movie got made?Huh okay? And I was like,

(11:22):
well, we'll see what happens whenI watched it again, and UM,
kind of still feel the same way. Yeah, it's I mean, yeah,
it's weird. Like so with StephanieMeyer's novel she wrote Twilight. The
series of Twilight is all from thepoint of view of Bella and then apparently

(11:43):
she flips it and there's another bookwhich I've never read or like looked into,
where it's from the point point ofview of Edward and so, which
is kind of an interesting thing todo. But yeah, it's it's very
strange. I don't know. Sothere, let's just get into it.
Yeah. So the opening scene isa very green forest with a deer and

(12:05):
ominous music. And I will sayabout this opening scene it does set the
tone because this whole movie is avibe. I mean, I've never really
a been to the Pacific Northwest,but holy hell, there's definitely a twilight
feel that I now, like whenI see something, I'll be like,

(12:28):
let's very twilight e because I don'tknow the Pacific Northwest. So it's like,
wow, is it a vibe?It's like gloomy but like the best
green that has ever existed. It'sbeautiful, but everything's just a little overcast
like it's and there's a little bitof fog everywhere. Yeah, and there's

(12:48):
no telling exactly what temperature it is, like, nobody don't worry about that.
Is it snowing? Is a spring? We don't know? Um because
because also the movie doesn't know either. It really doesn't know. So in
the you know, so we kindof go through this and it's got that

(13:09):
like the music that they put withthe movie. I mean that's a whole
vibe. Like there's literally I willsay this, this movie has got its
vibe solidified, like it knows whoit is. Yeah for sure. Um.
So Bella is leaving Phoenix to movein with her dad, and I
just have in my notes case doChristen Stewart looks like a ghost, oh

(13:33):
my God, or someone that grewup in the Jesus never seen the sun
like her, her skin has neverbeen kissed by the I'm sorry. I
understand that this is part of likeher, her character, but if you
have ever been to Phoenix or spentany time in Arizona, you become crispy.

(13:56):
Like it doesn't I did write inmy note, unlike Corey Haymon Lost
Boys, who is also from Arizonaand is wearing the craziest clothing on earth
and has a very golden tan andsun streaked terror as you would expect someone
to say, I'm from Arizona,Bella Swan looks like Lydia Diets and Beetlejuice,

(14:20):
like she is white as a ghost, the dark hair. Yeah,
so I remember this time. Itreally stood out to me. Now,
the Arizona thing is such a blipkind of in the story that I get
it, like you're not gonna totallyyou know, but it was very glaring
to me this time, probably becauseI'm taking notes and she's moving to Forks,

(14:43):
Washington, and her dad is character'sname is Charlie and he is chief
of police, and you know,we kind of see this whole montage of
kind of her leaving Arizona moving inwith dad. Dad's awkward showing like he
tried to update a room little bit, which is cute, like their little
vibe like of you know, kindof or they're little relate. You know.

(15:07):
I think I like in this moviethe awkwardness between the dad and Bella.
Right. Well, oh yeah,I think that's one thing that's got
going for He hasn't been present fora lot of her teenager preteen life,
so to suddenly have this like teenagegirl living in his house that would be

(15:28):
extremely awkward and uncomfortable for all partiesinvolved. Yeah. Well, and not
to mention that the reason is becausemom has completely moved on with someone else,
Like she's getting married to this guythat's you know, going he's going
to be a professional ball player.They're going to try out some stuff in
Jacksonville, Florida. And you know, for stability wise, she's still in

(15:52):
high school. She's just gonna golive with dad for a while and let
her mom have this adventure with hernew right fiance husband. I can't remember
if they're married or just engaged.Yeah, I can't tell I don't remember,
and then I have beat beat.Right away, we meet Jacob Billy
Black and the red Truck comes intoplay. Taylor Lautner, who plays Jacob,

(16:14):
has the whitest teeth I've ever seenin my life? Are we all?
Are you sure we weren't watching thislike next to each other and sharing
a brain cell because all I haveis like the blinding white teeth and the
horrible, horrible wig. Oh theharb Yeah, I said, the long
hair is so weird, but itdoes help how awkward he is with her.

(16:38):
It makes him seem more because Imean, look at the guy.
It's like, I'm sorry, butwhen we see what that evolves into being
that kid ain't awkward, that's like, what was that in disturbing behavior?
Trying to fucking tell me that thatJames Marsden is that his name? Yeah?

(17:00):
That he was ever the dork inhigh school? Hi? Or the
outcast fucking prince charming dude? Noway, So same thing. I do
think that the weird wig actually sortof helps the cover of the case that
he's like dorky little Jacob from thereservation. It's it's so like distracting though,
like it is like I just kepton seeing, like I was like,

(17:21):
did I mean that looks like theyjust took one of those like a
Spirit Halloween wigs and plot done onhis head one hundred percent. However,
I did read in the trivia.Now I kind of barely glanced over some
of the trivia, but um,it's also to me not as obvious,
but clearly Bella's wearing like extensions,Like nobody's hair is that full and thick

(17:44):
and like, you know, likeshe's got all this hair. And I
was reading in the um that theydid have her wear hairpieces. Um,
actually to save time to get thismovie filmed fast. So it does sort
of have those moments of like beingalmost the low budget vibe because you could
tell they're just like get it outthere, like ride the wave of popularity.

(18:06):
Let's do this, get it done, and we won't have to get
hair and make up out here forhours and hours on end. So maybe
that's why they only were able toswing by Spirit Halloween and get away for
Jacob. So it's the first dayof school and they do set the tone
that she's joining in like the spring, it's March, it's like mid semester.

(18:27):
So she is definitely in the world'smost terrible position. It's got to
be for a high school or tobe new at that stage, like you're
like basically at spring break, andthat just seems very But you know,

(18:47):
she's kind of a loner. Ido think that, like Kristen Stewart plays
like the loaner, kind of likeI'm fine, I got this, I'm
just going to get through high school. She doesn't seem very like put out
by the fact that she's starting abrand new school, Like it doesn't seem
like she's particularly bothered by no.It seems like she's just sort of like,

(19:10):
all right, well, I mean, she said that it'd be nice
if Jacob was at the same school, but he's not because he's a school
in the reservation that she would haveknown one person. But she's, you
know, she seems kind of okaybeing a loner, and she right away
she starts meeting the people, soall the other kids, the you know,
the chess pieces here we've got atForks High School. I do love

(19:32):
the scene in gym class when they'replaying volleyball and she just knocks the ball
right into a kid's head so hardand has the most what I felt very
genuine like, oh my god,I'm sorry. She almost as if in
real life maybe hit him harder thanshe thought or something, because I this

(19:55):
time that one still held up forme. I also kind of like forgot
how great Anna Kendrick is in asJessica, Like she's great in everything,
it's just who she is, butlike for having this kind of sidebar character,
like she's so good. Yeah,she plays that like on it's that

(20:18):
like fren of me kind of rolevery well in this, especially at the
beginning, like I feel like becauseshe's trying to feel Bella out and like,
who is this is going to challengemy popularity? And well she's the
middle of the road, right becauseshe's not like the elite popular crowd that's

(20:38):
coming. And then she's also notbottom of the social circles. So I
think she plays Anna Kendrick plays itreally well of that like I'm trying to
be nice, but I also feelthreatened, and I love like she just
does it really well. And shebrings up the lack of tan, which

(20:59):
is right. And then she hasanother girlfriend named Angela, and I said,
buy a large. What I alsonoticed this time around that these actors,
regardless of what age they really are, they do a nice job of
like they look like high schoolers.Yeah, I felt like there wasn't no
one. And I think having itset in um like the Pacific Northwest lends

(21:26):
better to the not everybody looks likethey've come out of a magazine. Yes,
I mean they're all beautiful, butlike they don't look like they've been
stylized, right, because the styleis they all wear jeans and raincoats and
sweatshirts and right because it's cold,converse gym shoots because it's like you're not

(21:48):
in southern California running around in abikini top at school. Right, I'm
looking at you never been kissed,like you know, poor Jessica Alba and
though that was supposed to be inIllinois, but you know, well I
digress. I mean, hey,so I do I do like that that
like these characters for me again,like they just especially too. I think

(22:11):
there's been so many of these movieswe watched where it's like it's the very
much the Luke Perry and nine Otwo and oh, like are you fucking
kidding me right now? Like we'redoing like he's thirty he's thirty five playing
a seventeen year old. Stop itwhere at least with this, I do
feel like this particular crew all looksvery high school and even like and I

(22:32):
think Tyler Lattner is or Taylor Latneris um like Jacob character, he is
almost age age spot out like,yeah, he is a teenager, so
he has that real baby face kindof like it's so it's it was nice.
It was nice to notice that sincewe've s seen so many movies where
that is not the case, andI get it, um and I just

(22:56):
have in my notes enter the color. Oh wow, So that whole crew
of kids looks like kids. Theselook like grown ass people. They look
like they're one hundred and eight yearsold, stuck in time, like what
is happening? Like I've been aroundthe block twenty five million times, so

(23:19):
I know how to dress myself andmake myself look the best that I can
look. Yes, I will tellyou I don't encounter the put togetherness of
the colons in high school. However, I do encounter the students that you're
like, wow, do you youkiss the wife and kids before you come
in the building? A because ifwe were at a bar I'm not sure

(23:40):
which of us would get cardon,Like, I mean, so I get
that, but that's not what we'vegot going on here. This is like,
yeah, they are highly stylized,grown ass people. They're supposed to
be foster kids that move from Alaska. And Jessica Anna Kendrick is narrating on
this and she's like and they're liketogether together, and she's describing the couples,

(24:03):
and I was like, this isso gross and weird, Like I
know, it's like not because ifthey are truly foster kids, they are
in no way related, but soproblematic like DCFS would be, like,
say what again, I don't thinkthey're going through DCFS, Melissa. I

(24:27):
don't think they really have to worryabout that, but you know, I
mean what I did notice, whichagain is still very distracting to me,
is that fucking Jasper looks like he'sgoing to vomit throughout this entire movie.
He looks like he's holding in afart. Yeah, he looks like he

(24:51):
is Jacob Marley's ghost holding in afart. And his hair looks like Jacob
Marley's ghost. Like he is justlike, what is happening? Yeah,
it's it's in order of appearance.We have Rosalie and emmett um Alice and
Jasper and Edward and his hair.Those are the couples. Because holy hell,

(25:15):
what's happening with edwards hair? Itis so large and in charge.
It's it's its own character. I'mlooking at IMDb and they are remiss that
they don't have in the cast ofcharacters Edwards haird played by Robert Pattins's follicles,
because what is happening? I justam trying to picture. The reason

(25:36):
that they had to give Kristen Stewarthair extension pieces that she could just clip
in and snap on is because ittook nine hours every day to figure out
how to keep that hair so big. It's so big, it's so big.

(25:57):
Yeah, anyway, Colin is afoster dad slash matchmaker and I just
wrote creepy. When you say thosewords all loud, it sounds really strange.
Yes, this is teenager Land,So okay, we're going to cut
to science class that was in thecafeteria. Now we go into biology and

(26:22):
there's of course a Beyonce fan.So when Bella walks in, she gets
a nice Beyonce blow out and that'sher first viewing of you know, Edward
face to face, and he justlooks absolutely grossed out in second by her.
Yeah, like he looks like heis going to vomit. Everybody's everybody's

(26:45):
taken the class on how to look. It's like you're going to like how
you're going to hold in your yourvomit. What's the Disney Pixar movie about
the emotions inside out, inside out? They've all got discussed, discussed down
to a science. Um, Iput like he does a good job,

(27:08):
like Robert Pattinson does a good joblooking grossed out in this scene. But
damn, these close up shots areawkward and it's just gonna keep going these
super close up Oh my god,I know I'm staring into your soul and
just long pauses because that's real life. If if he stared, if anyone

(27:36):
stared at me like he stares,I would, Um, I'm sorry,
teacher, that guy's creeping me out. I don't want to sit next to
him because he's weird. Like,well, he has the hot guy though,
so I know, I know,but you know, I do love

(27:59):
that After class they bump into eachother in like the main office and Edwards
trying to get out of biology.I'll take any other class you've got,
and they're like, dude, it'sMarch fuck right off, and he just
says, I'll just have to endureit and looks at her like she is
dogshit on her shoe. I waslike, oh my gosh, this is
intense for Bella to have as afirst day, like right well, And

(28:23):
I thought it was hilarious that,like, you know, the fan comes
by and like he like is likedisgusted by her stench, and like shelf
checks. She's like, listen,do I smell okay? Like did I
put deodoran on this morning? Yes, which is a natural reaction based on
that ship. So you know,she gets through the first day of school

(28:48):
and her mom calls her to askhow it is, and they seem to
have like a very best friend relationship. So we see a little bit of
that the next day at school.We're back in the parking lot. Bella
drives or red truck to school andum, like the Cullens are arriving in
a jeep and Emmett is standing onthe back like he's a god. I

(29:11):
don't what is Like he's a gladiator. I don't know what's happening, like
like on a chariot, Yes,a chariot, Like is he a chariot?
What school do we watch? Idon't understand. Um weird, And
I think this actually, though,in some ways, really effective, because

(29:33):
these weird behaviors would keep people fromeven trying to break break the barrier,
Like no one can be friends withthem. They're so fucking like gorgeous and
weird and there's just no chance,right, they don't want to talk to
anyone. They stare at people weird. It's not good. It's just not
like I'm not even gonna know.The guy rides in on a jeep like

(29:55):
it's a fucking chariot and absolutely not. And he looks like a linebacker,
so it's like, yes, yes, he's as wide as a yardstick.
It's insane. Um. So thenext day and oh, I'm sorry.
So then Bella wants to confront Edwardbecause she's like, you know what,
motherfucker, let me give this guya piece of my mind. But he

(30:15):
never shows and he doesn't show fordays, so like she's kind of like,
okay, well that solves that problem. And then there's a cut scene
of like a construction worker getting chasedand he was getting and he got killed,
and it's kind of like you don'tyou know, don't get to see
you know, it's the mystery that'sgoing to happen here in Forks. So

(30:37):
it's raining and Edwards back at school, back in biology class. So I
have to say, mad props tothe biology teacher here are trying to make
shit exciting and spray painting an oniongold and talking about mitosis like it is
the most exciting thing because I fuckingon or stand dude like he's like,

(31:03):
who gets to win the onion?I'm like I was thinking. I was
like, well, you know,I mean like I think he would be
a fun teacher. He reminds meof some of my teachers in high school
that were a little bit This ishow you this is how you become misprizzle,
You become the quirky teacher. You'reweird now. It's just because you
are standing up there trying so hardto get anybody to pay attention and be

(31:26):
excited about anything you're gonna do today, and you are next thing, you
know, spray painting an onion gold, making an award and talking about my
tosis like it's the Oscars, it'syou know, mad pups. So Edward's
back right, and yes, nowhe's like a whole new person, talk

(31:52):
right, and and she's like,He's like I was. She's like,
well, what happened to you?He's like, I went out of town
for a few days for personal reasons. He couldn't have just said Eddie was
sick. True that, but maybethat's the only answer he could come up
with, because she's I fucking himthe whole time. Like she's like,
like, just I was like,wow, Bella, I put him my

(32:15):
notes Jesus Spella simm A down,I know, like keep it in your
pants, girl, dang girl.So um, I don't asking her all
kinds of questions. They're walking outof class together. You know, they
won the onion. You know,you're hard to read. She's like,
you know, it's just this soweird. And then they're out like in

(32:37):
the hallway, and she's kind oflike, did you get contacts? Because
your eyes are like a different color, And this scares him away. Of
all the things, is what scareshim away is did you get contacts?
Right? Well? And like he'sasking her these questions and she why is

(32:58):
every question so hard for her toanswer? Every question the simplest question,
teach girls are not this mysterious.However, I will say this, Um,
it does help when you are ona rewatch and now you know why
he's so weird. It does makethese scenes make more sense. Yes,
where like his weird line of questioningis based on the fact that, like

(33:23):
the reveal later that you know hecan't his special abilities and shit, but
it's just, yeah, it's weird. And she plays it like she's fucking
I don't know, James Bond orsome shit like right, Like she's keeping
everything real close to the vest andlots of blinking, just lots of blinking
block. Yeah, super perplexed byall of his questions. Well, and

(33:47):
maybe I do feel like though,the way the cadence of the thing was
going was maybe she was just superstunned of like what are we friends now?
Like I guess you literally looked atme like I smelled like dogshit,
right, Like you literally ran outof dude. I'll just have to endure
it, because what he said whenhe looked right at her, I mean

(34:10):
I would be questioning my own sanitya little bit, and maybe a little
flustered. So after school, inthe parking lot, Bella standing by her
truck, Edward is I put staringslash glaring from far across the parking lot,
and again I could see Bella beinglike, what the fuck is this?
Now? You look at me likea homicidal maniac? What is going

(34:32):
on? And a van starts toskid to hit her, and she should
have been crushed, but Edward magicallygets there and stops the land with his
hand and put the giant dent inthe van. I do think that this
is a clever reveal that he isdifferent in a very different way, right,

(34:55):
Yes, what the fuck? AndBella is not going to easily be
able to ask a bunch of questionsbecause people will think she's nuts? So
I did. I thought it wasa clever reveal, like you know,
um, And she ends up goingto hospital to get checked out. So
does the kid that was driving thevan, the poor kid. Now,
like nobody gives a shit about thekid that was driving the van who's bleeding

(35:15):
from this forehead and shit he getsyelled at. I mean, geez,
I know. We meet doctor Cullenand it's Peter Visinelli. Yeah, from
can hardly wait he just it justit blows my mind that that's the same
the same dude. I mean thatblonde hair first of all, is just

(35:38):
wait, can we let's just wellokay, I guess I was just gonna
say, like, how many yearsapart and still in a high school movies?
But he is playing a parent ofthe high schoolers. He is playing
an adult, he's playing a doctor. So um, but his the makeup
is so bad, Like his makeupis I feel like on him. His

(36:01):
is almost like maybe it's because ofthe blonde hair and the white lab coat
or something like. I mean,yeah, I was like, you're not
fooling anybody to like think that you'renot a vampire. Yes, I think
that with I almost wonder And I'mtrying to remember what the book said about

(36:28):
doctor Cullen or whatever, because Ifeel like they were trying to change too
many things to maybe fit whatever thedescription was in the book. And he
is like dark hair, he's ayou know, Italian, so he's got
like some undertones and to try andit's like you're trying too hard on too

(36:50):
many things like the skin and thehair, when really if you would have
just put maybe some frost into pighlightsin and then like, if you really
want to let us hang onto thisblonde thing, you know what. I
like, I don't know him.It makes him look very fake, like
yes, very false. And Ido think it'd be interesting because I haven't

(37:14):
watched the like the the following moviesin a long time to see if that
gets better, Like I can't,like, I don't think I do remember
watching. I do think I sawlike the at least the next one in
the theater. I went with afriend of mine. But I do feel
like they got a bigger budget andI did better with the makeup and all

(37:37):
of that. Like I do feellike I remember because I remember just I
mean seeing it the first time,it like smacked you in the face,
like wow, this is yeah,this this is good. No. Um.
So Charlie is there at the hospitaland he tells Bella she has to
call her mom, like you haveto say that, like this act didn't

(38:00):
happen, like you gotta call her. So she does, and so she's
making the phone call and she's kindof you know as she's fine, And
Charlie's talking to the other kid andshe sees Edward doctor Culin and Rosalie,
one of the other siblings arguing inthe hallway, and she decides to approach

(38:20):
and is like, can we talklike to Edward, Dude, what the
fuck was that? Know? Yeah? Um, and he tries to gaslight
the shit out of her. Yes, I swear, Melissa, we like.
I was like, Edward, gaslightingstarts early. I mean, he's
just nope, nope, I don'tknow what you're talking about. You didn't

(38:43):
see this one. See that.No one will believe what you said.
I was like, well, okay, that's a giant run flag there I
did put in there, like thisis super toxic yet effective for this storyline,
right, Like, it don't work. It's it's almost like you're like,
okay, well, I can understandthe gas lighting happening here. I

(39:05):
mean he is a vampire, like, I mean, it doesn't bode well
for him if everybody knows the secret, so that, but you know,
yeah, it's like that. Thenthere's the other like Mama bear older sister
piecing me that. It's like Bella'sa fucking child, will you see?
Yeah, slow down, we don'tneed to be teaching her this toxic shit
this early on? Right, Um? I did love the quote though at

(39:27):
the end when like she's she doesn'tgive up very easily. She's like,
no to what happened, Like,I know what I saw, And he
says, I hope you enjoy disappointment, and I do. Like that Like
that kind of shows us that,like, I don't know you just if
you have, if you know thebook or you've seen the movie, you

(39:51):
can see how Like that's just areally effective line for this because it is
like, yeah, sure he youknow, not humans and in some ways
superhuman, but also a monster.You know. It's so like I don't
know. Then Bella's like dreaming thatshe sees Edward in her room and I

(40:21):
don't know. So okay, We'reback at school like the next day,
and it's field trip day with ourgood old biology teacher. Um, I
think you can only afford one teacher. Um, so I'm okay with I
do. Hey, I'm okay withit. Let's stick with the same teacher.
I don't need to know all yourteachers, that's fine. Um.

(40:43):
But they're going on this biology fieldtrip and Mike asks her to prom and
just like wow, okay, uhso Bella is like, sorry, I'm
going to be in Jacksonville, likewith visiting my mom. Yeah nah,
I'm good, poor guy. ButBella does Jessica a solid and it's like,

(41:04):
Jessica, she really likes you,So I thought that was pretty cool,
which then that helps with changing thedynamic because Jessica liked my like likes
Mike, and then um, he'sintrigued by the new girl. So she
was very much more had her guardup, and then once that ship changes,
she's like, oh, well okay, we can be frank Yeah yeah.

(41:29):
Um the biology teacher saying compost iscool with the kind of excitement that
you would say we're going into Disneyland. I just again feel this in every
part of my every cell in mybody is like, yeah, this is
the job. Holy shit, howmany more years? Jesus? Uh So.

(41:53):
Edward asks Bella about Jacksonville and they'rekind of like again, Bella's not
buying it, like yeah, thefuck you know? And he's like,
sorry, I'm really rude. It'sfor the best. Okay, Well,
he goes we shouldn't be friends,and she's like were we friends before?

(42:15):
Like I'm confused. I mean yes, she confusion, yes, but um,
when he says sorry, I'm sorude. It's for the best.
This might be our new T shirt. Oh my god, sorry, I'm
so rude for the time. Ohmy god. This might be the most

(42:37):
overlooked quote in this whole fucking saga, literally saga, they call it that.
Um So, Jessica interrupts Edward andBella about prom and you know,
Bella keeps given Edward the business andshe says, you know, sorry,
you regret saving me. And sothere's this you know, like kind of

(42:59):
and she's taking it personally and asshe should, like this again, you
acted like a smell like shit,now you're acting like a total asshole,
but like you saved my life butwon't tell me any details, what the
fuck? And like you're friends withme one minute, you're shitty to me
the next minute, like very crazy. Um So, back in the you

(43:20):
know, I don't know if it'sthe same day whatever, but they're back
in the cafeteria because again, weonly have so many sets here. Yeah,
the kids all invite her to LaPush Beach on the reservation and Edward
does the apple trick from the coverof the book. I was reading in

(43:43):
the trivia that this took like somany takes for him to like get because
he had to mimic the like handsin the book. And then I'm guessing
he drops the apple and they playit backwards, but oh my god,
it's um and he asks her like, well, what are your theories about

(44:04):
how I stopped the van? Andyou know, she's kind of like kind
of like superhero e, like whatthe fuck? And he's like, well,
what if I'm not the hero,I'm the bad guy. Well now,
I mean she's ready to fuck you. Is what's happening? Yep?
Like, holy hell ah. Asmuch as this guy is like, I

(44:30):
don't, it's just this is soproblematic for like little teenagers to watch.
It's like how it should be justnot this is playing into all of the
bad boy asshole. If he's meanto you, it means he likes you.
Bullishit that we are trying you canchange You can change him, You

(44:53):
can change him, and that weare trying as a society. I think
to shed that snakeskin, and it'sjust wow, oh boy, if only
the love of a good woman canchange him, you know what I mean.
She invites him to have some fun. Why don't you just relax hang

(45:14):
out at the beach, have somefriends, and he doesn't go for it
again, talk about well now shereally wants to you act like you don't
really care, Like, nah,not going to do any of that toxic.
So we're at the beach next dayor whatever. This looks freezing.
Um it is so if you've everbeen beach on you know, that side

(45:42):
of the ocean on the Pacific North, Like, because I lived in the
Bay Area, when you would goto Bedega Bay, which was you know,
the closest beach, I was injeans and a sweatshirt. If you're
going like in the water, you'reputting on just like those people you're putting
on wetsuits or dry suits. Itwas probably like because it's freezing and it's

(46:07):
not comfortable. It's miserable. Oh, Wendy, everything about it looks so
not fun. So Bella encourages Angelato be her own woman and ask another
guy to prom and Jacob arrives becausethey're on the reservation, and there's the
awkward like, well the clons don'tcome here conversation and so okay, I

(46:29):
put Jacob is so cute in thisscene. Think he's really cute. Yeah,
he tells her that the tribe isdescended from wolves that he's part of,
and that the Cullons are from anenemy clan, and that they had
a treaty to stay off their landand the tribe won't expose what they really

(46:50):
are. And I love the wholeexchange here of like it's just a stupid
story like legend and this is dumb, and I feel stupid even telling you,
right, and like, I thinkthat it's played really well between them,
and like I will say from thebooks, one of the things that

(47:12):
they got right here is the castingof these three. The Edward Bella chemistry
slash toxicity is spot on and theBella Jacob friendship cuteness spot on. Like
it's very good. I have tosay that as weird as this gets,
if this part is gone, getsweird. Oh, it gets so weird.

(47:36):
So we have another scene at theboat docks and there's like, uh,
some bad guy vampires that show upand actually kill Charlie's pal Waylan.
It was like we saw him atlike the cafe, Like it's about minor

(47:58):
character, but it is a sheriff'slike buddy that gets murdered at the boat
docks, and they I was likeJames. How do I know him?
Because I couldn't remember. And theway that I knew him is from Never
Back Down? Have you ever seenthat movie? No? I got introduced

(48:22):
on the twenty two hour bus rideto Orlando, Florida with the band on
the coach bus that I'll never doagain. There were the TVs and back
in the day, you know,because everybody didn't have a smartphone, you
had to play a movie and youwe allowed them if it was like PG

(48:42):
thirteen, they could put it inthe pile of like suggested movies. And
one of the kids had brought thisNever Back Down movie and I just remember
viewing it and it is like thedorkiest I don't know boxing, street fighting.
It's it's a try hard situation andthat's what I knew him from.

(49:02):
But why does he have no shirt? Um? Which one? So?
Which one are you talking about?The guy? The white guy with the
plant ponytail? So you know whereI know him from? Right? No?
Easy a? Oh? Is hefrom easy A? Uh? Huh?

(49:27):
Noh? Who does he play?You're gonna die? Look it up.
I'm looking right now, I'm lookingright now. Hold on, hold
on, this is this is crazywait, it just clicked on like the
wrong thing, all right, James, James, James, where are you
James? Oh my god? HowAnd I totally know? Easy a okay,

(49:50):
hold on, hold on. Wow. He's been in a lot of
things. He plays Mica, Mica, the guy with chlamydia. Fucking a
stop. Oh no, yeah,it's all I'm having a Selein Dion moment.
It's all coming back to me.Now, God, what's happening?

(50:21):
Oh wow. I don't know why, but that just escaped me. I
was still back in, never backdown. I was staring at him in
this movie, going like why doI know him? Why do I know
him? Why do I know him? And then it hit me and I
was like, holy fucking what wow? Yeah, oh wow, okay,

(50:45):
all right, nice? Uh wow. So we've got the Three Batties and
uh at school, it's now asunny day. The next day and Jessica
says, whenever the weather gets nice, actor and missus cullin take the kids
camping and fishing. I love thenext time when she's like, I tried

(51:06):
that on my parents, not evenclose. That's the's truth, right,
hey for effort, right yep.And so like there's more prom talk,
and then they talk about like they'regonna go dress shopping, and you know,
Bella says she's gonna be out oftown for prom, but she still
agrees to go shopping with the girls, but she has an ulterior motive.

(51:27):
She wants to check out this bookstorethat is like in town. More so,
the three girls are like at thedress shop, she knows the bookstores
close by. While they're busy tryingon dresses, she's like, hey,
do you guys mind if I likerun across the street and go check out
this bookstore. And she's been doingresearch because she's still not given up on

(51:47):
what the fuck happened in that parkinglot, right, and decides to get
this tribal book based on jacob storyof like, huh, let me just
see if I can dig a littledeeper on that. And when she comes
out, there were these dudes walkingaround leering at the girls, like in

(52:07):
the dress sort of window, beingstupid boys. They're literally called frat boys
in the IMDb. They don't haveactual names or anything. And now they
are approaching Bella and this is thereal scary shit. Fuck vampires and werewolves,
this nonsense of like a whole groupof dudes approaching you in the dark

(52:29):
and encircling and encircling you, predatoryso gross. Um Bella doesn't fuck around.
She just kicks one straight up,like get move, yeah out the
way that my friend is a copschild, yes, like no, no,

(52:52):
um, and I put well done. But she is outnumbered like this,
this is this is kind of like, you know, uh, scary,
and it's like we were building tensionand car screeches in and it's Edward
just out of nowhere. I waslike, first of all, okay,
great, great, um that youhave. You're there, But my next

(53:17):
question would be, how the fuckdid you know I was here? Were
you following me? She asks thequestion though that's coming. However, I
feel I wrote in my notes,I feel bad for Robert Pattinson and all
of the very strange close ups thathe is being required to make, these

(53:39):
faces like and if you haven't seenthis movie in a while and you're like
I kind of remember that, Ohno, you don't remember that. It's
traumatizing. The close ups go onfor so long, the stairs and glares
go on for soul. This iswhy I could never be an actor,
because I'd be like are you areyou serious right now? Can do it

(54:00):
again longer? What didn't you getthe last twenty times we did this?
The fuck I couldn't? Um,so I put he glares the guys away,
m just gets out the car,stares at him for a minute and

(54:20):
they disperse, which I put alittle crazy. But some would say that
I can do that. Um,I mean that is your superpower. It
really is, it really is.Do you know? I don't think I
tell you the story that um Mystudents in the wild here like in real
life, on their own not onlycame up with that conclusion but told me

(54:45):
so, oh it was like aroundHalloween. And now my classroom that I
teach child development in, we're doingthe like halfway lunch period so that the
cafeteria is impact. So what theydo is they have half of the kids
go in the auditorium and then halfwaythrough lunch there's a passing period of just

(55:06):
switching from auditorium to cafeteria. Well, unfortunately, my hallway is like the
traffic management like they send the kidsdown this way to head into the cafeteria
and then they go up the otherside to go into the auditorium. So
that again you're not having all thismash of bodies right COVID. So my
room was blazing hot, and soI could not not prop the door open,

(55:29):
like I was like, I'm dyingin here. And so the passing
period is happening, and two ofthe girls were just getting a little slap
happy, and it was the heat. I'm going to tell you that right
now. They were like, oh, miss me, we want to go
stand in the hallway and scare people. I don't go ahead, And first
of all, I don't think that'sthe answer they were expecting. So they're
standing in their hallway and the onegirl goes, it's not working. Nobody's

(55:51):
scared of us, and so Igive her this mask. It's like a
laminated picture of a troll face thatsomeone used in their lesson of being like
a roll under the bridge in thepreschool. And I said, here,
you use this skull. Put iton out there, and they're laughing and
for you know, all stuff.And it doesn't work, you know.
So they come back in and they'relike, I said, what did you
think it's gonna happen? You're standingout there trying to scare people in the
hallway, and they're like, Imean, truthfully, we kind of knew

(56:15):
it wasn't gonna work. I mean, probably the only person really that could
stand out of the hallway and scarepeople would be you, Missy. And
I was like what and they're like, I was like, what do you
mean? And they're like, oh, you know, And I was like,
true, I really just have tolook at you, don't I And
she's like, yes, it's prettybad. It's like, okay, well,

(56:37):
I mean you're not wrong, thenI'm I'm not gonna I'm you know,
hey, it's you have assessed thesituation. Well, you are on
your way to becoming an adult.Don't fuck with this mess. Right here,
he glis the guy's away and putsBella in the car, and there

(56:59):
is this very intense, you don'tknow what vile things they were thinking about
doing to you and right and thenhe goes and I heard what they were
thinking. And this does not surpriseBella whatsoever. She seems not very surprised
by this. She doesn't, butI think she's a little fucked up with
like what what what is this true? And he's driving like a maniac,

(57:21):
which could put you just a littlebit of like this is how I die,
not by those four guys. Butlet's here, this is how,
this is how this goes. Sohe takes her to the restaurant to meet
the girls, because now Bella hasbeen gone for a while, and I
will say, the girls are like, well, we ate without you,
and we were calling you but youdidn't answer. And this is where I

(57:43):
had to remind myself that like Bellais still like a fringe friend, she's
like weird new girl. Because Iwas trying to picture that, I'm like,
there is no fucking way I wouldgo with like a group of friends
and one person walks off to abookshop and we don't at least go walk
over there and like try to figureout what happened to her. Yeah,
like we wouldn't eat dinner and belike, wow, she must have pieced

(58:04):
out of here. She doesn't havea car, right, she isn't answering
her phone what So that was alittle like weak, But okay, I
guess maybe there are people that arelike that. And Edward takes the blame
and they are all a flutter withgetta goals. Yes, all, so

(58:27):
this is what happened. So theygo into the restaurant, so Edward and
Bella are going to go in andeveryone hits on Edward. Everyone It's just
everyone hits on Edward. He doesn'teat. I'm on a special diet.
She's suspicious, rightfully so, andthat's when she finally is like, wait
a minute, how did you knowwhere I was? Are you like following

(58:52):
me? What is happening? Andso this is super creepy for her,
um, because he kind of didfollow her to be detective. Oh and
I this is it's been a while, you know what what emoji? I
drew the teeth. God. No, girl, this is not romantic.

(59:19):
This is fucking weird. This isweird and stalker material. So um,
stalker is not romantic. No.Stalking is also problematic with that series you
like, with Penn Badgeley, Likeit's like, as an adult, I
can handle this. If it wereAudrey and she was like a teenage girl,

(59:43):
I would be like I would bepausing it every five minutes, like
you know why? This guy's fuckingtoxic ass shit, Like this is not
cute, This isn't romantic, thisis not cool. He doesn't love these
girls. He's a psycho. Okay, anybody ever does the ship to you
you run the other way, yes, so you know, basically he says

(01:00:06):
he heard what those lives were thinking, and she catches that and he tells
her that, you know, hecan hear people's thoughts and he can read
everyone's mind, but radio silence fromher, like I can't read your thoughts,
which is would now explain why he'salways looking at her weird, staring
her down, Like how come Ican't hear what's going on inside your fucking

(01:00:27):
brand? Dude? Okay, andI just wrote this would suck, Like
if we want to flip the scriptand beyond Edward's side for a second,
from his point of view, talkabout a curse. I don't want to
know what people are thinking. Idon't want to know talk about what was
this line? Prepare? I hopeyou enjoy disappointment? Like cool? Did

(01:00:51):
you ever see the Buffy the Vampire? She's just fighting a demon or something
and then like she ends up beinghaving the ability to hear everybody's thoughts.
Probably no, I did, becauseI watched that show religiously, but I
don't remember like that. Yeah,And basically it's they're like it's going to
slowly like turn her insane, likeshe's gonna lose her mind because and there's

(01:01:15):
just there's no filter. No onehas filter. Everybody's thoughts are such a
mishmash of like goggledee gook that youit would drive you insane. Sometimes I
am so fucking mortified and embarrassed bymy own thoughts, Like what am I
even thinking about? Do? Ijust imagine myself falling from a mountainside and
like that I'd be dead forever andwouldn't see Audrey. Like this is stupid.

(01:01:38):
I need to just stop right here, Like I don't want anyone to
have to like put themselves through that. Oh my god, that would be
the world's worst superpower to have.That would be that. I don't want
to read anyone's mind ever. No, thank you no, And then his
line, I don't have the strengthto stay away from you anymore, and

(01:02:00):
I just wrote, oh lord,I mean, let's take angst that teen
angsty romance and we're not dialing itup to eleven, we're going off the
Richtersdale just boom, oh yeah.So he drives her home. They both

(01:02:25):
kind of reach for like the radioor the air vents or something, and
she does feel his like bumps hishand and he's ice cold. So now
Bella is starting to like she'll eventuallystart putting everything together, like it's happening
people. She's going to figure outthat he's a vampire. Doctor Cullen.
They are coming home and they seeflashing lights and she's like, oh my

(01:02:46):
gosh, I think my dad's there. What happened? And they find out
that that guy Waylon was killed.Doctor Culin tells him he was killed by
an animal attack and that was Charlie'sfriend. So I just wrote Edwards.
Hair is so big in these scenes, like, it's so big in this
particular set of scenes. Holy hell, it is so large and in charge.

(01:03:09):
I can't even believe it. Bellagoes in to be with her dad.
You know which right is appropriate?Um? I do love Charlie.
It gives her mace or pepper spray. His character and the way it's played
is great. It's yeah, Ithink it's done really well. And when

(01:03:30):
they bring out Whyleen, it's likeshe gets a look at like the corpse's
arm or foot or something, andit's like it sort of reminds her of
the pallor of the Cullens, andshe starts doing more research. I mean,
it's cue the vampire realization montage,Like, well, there's nerdy vampire
dreams, very weird, but weknew it was coming, right she had

(01:03:55):
to discover right. Um, SoBella's theory has suddenly taken a hard left.
No longer superhero, we're talking universalmonsters at school. There's a lot
of dramatic staring and walking and staring, and they head for the woods,

(01:04:15):
which I'm like, Okay, let'shead to the woods while there's a wild
animal on the loose that I needmy mace for. So here's where Yeah,
Bella's survival instincts are very off.She was on point with kicking the
dude right when those dudes approached her. She is suspect that there's either a

(01:04:40):
dangerous animal, as you said thateveryone's been telling her, here's some mace,
here a bear mace, whatever.You know, Like this you suspect
from all your research. I feellike, according to my research, you
might be a vampire. But I'mgoing to go in the woods own with
you while there's a wild animal alsoattacking things, and let's pretend I'm not

(01:05:06):
scared of vampires. And I thinkthat's fucking nuts. I am motherfucking scared
of bears and like cougars and mountainlions and whatever the fuck could be in
those woods? Are you kidding meright now? Oh wow? Um,
but she does. That's the decisionshe makes. And there's these like they're
in the woods again. We're backin the beautiful green scenery. I do

(01:05:30):
like that. It goes with thevibe. And then there is this strange
choice to keep swirling the cameras aroundthem, like it reminds me and Carrie
when they're at the prom and Carrie'sdancing with the do and it's just like,
oh my gosh, we are allgonna throw up on the tiltable right
now? What's going on? Likethat's what It's just these circling cameras,
which very weird, but I doit's very strange, but I do love

(01:05:55):
the woods and all that. Umshe figured it out. I think you're
a vampire, asked me what weand then it's like his first reveal is
you need to see me in thesunlight now okay, no, okay,
wait, we've missed. We missedthis. This was my favorite line of
the whole reveal, and I itmade me laugh out loud when they go

(01:06:20):
she goes, how old are yougo? Seventeen? She's like, how
long have you been? Seventeen?Like that made me like laugh. I
was like, that's a very right, I see. That's the thing is
all these scenes have these little bitsof cleverness. However, Okay, so
he wants to show her what helooks like in the sunlight, and he
sparkles. He's glittery. In thebook, it's less weird. Uh huh,

(01:06:45):
yeah, because like they describe Ifeel like they describe his skins like
like this, it almost looks likelike diamonds what they they say, And
it's almost like hard like it looksit just hasn't much about it makes him
look inhuman like. It's basically thiswas the way of him looking in human.

(01:07:05):
Now, I will say this aboutStephanie Meyer and her Twilight Universe.
What I respected about this story,and this is one of the elements I
at this point in the book anddefinitely thought it was cool that she sort
of made her own rules with avampire story, Like, Okay, well

(01:07:28):
here's what you think you know aboutvampires, because literally all the things are
like present in almost every vampire story. You know, the garlic or the
whole holy water or the sunlight oryou know all the things, and so
you think you know and then shejust sort of like flips it all intent
and it's like, well, youknow what, here's the thing. There's
not like coffins and weird shit.You know. It's like they never sleep

(01:07:51):
and they sparkle in the sunlight becausethat's what makes it so that they can't
walk around with the humans all day. And so I like that she kind
of had this like her own setof rules, and that made me,
I think, stick with the storybecause it was like, well, I
don't really know what to expect nowbecause if she's changing the game on like
a vampire story, now what youknow, like how does this play out?

(01:08:15):
So I think that helped keep meintrigued. Um when like reading this,
Um so I don't mind the sparklething. It's just very dorky the
way it plays out in this scene. Yeah, you know what, I
did really mind, And every timeI see it, I just I just
can't the fucking spider monkey throwing heron the back and like flowing through the

(01:08:43):
woods where what it's like a killerYoda. He does not this is the
weirdest sense I've ever written in mymovie notes. He does weird acrobats to
show her his powers of killing.It's like just sounds like something a run
fair person would say, like,let me do all my weird acrobat moves

(01:09:06):
to show you what a strong killerI am. Oh God, to be
fair, Bellas should be scared.But wow, So this is where the
line of like you're like my ownpersonal brand of heroin, which is very
problematic. Yeah, okay, it'seffective. It's an effective description. And

(01:09:30):
I also was reading that like theyreally wanted to get the line in there
of like, so the lion fellin love with the lamb. So that's
like a thing. I guess inthis movie that they kept that direct quote
from the book. I don't knowwhatever. All of this is so toxic,
but like teenager romantic. Uh huhokay, I've killed people before.

(01:09:55):
It doesn't matter. Really, itshould it should heures. Here's my numbered
list for this episode's notes. Bella'sthoughts. Number one Edwards a vampire.
Number two he wants to drink herblood. M hm, he said it
right to her fucking face. Ye. Number three, I just love him.

(01:10:24):
What I'm sorry, what if thisain't teen romance shit, ain't not
in teen romance shit, like Ijust wrote in my notes oof oo,
yeah, fella, Spella is nota murderino. No, she's not.

(01:10:45):
She's not um no, because she'sin the woods, she's walking by herself,
She's not um. So we're backat school again, and the parking
lot debut of Edward and Bella.I do think that it was cool.
How like there's this dorky teenager momentof like, okay, we're a couple

(01:11:09):
now, and the Cullen siblings alllook pissed. They look fucking pissed,
And it's very sinister because they arevery effectively pissed off, looking like the
fuck you say, what is this? Well, because he's basically threatening their

(01:11:29):
entire existence by doing this. True. Edward also tells Bella about how Carlyle
like chooses people to like save inthis way, and that for him it
was during the nineteen eighteen Spanish flu. And I'd just like to take a
minute to give this public service announcementto all the people out there that are

(01:11:50):
maybe wondering if this is a possibilitythat perhaps you will avoid COVID nineteen because
someone such as doctor Cullen will swoopin when you might be ventilated and in
an emergency room intensive carry gasping foryour last breath. He'll turn you into

(01:12:10):
a vampire. Yeah, I wouldsay, don't put your eggs in that
basket, get your ass to Walgreensand get vaccinated. Okay, could you
just agreed? Agreed? Okay?PSA over that hit different this time when
I was like, oh Spanish,m okay. So the bad guy of

(01:12:31):
vampires are the ones that killed Whylon. And we also get the reveal that
like Alice can see the future.It's just a sort of like a passing
note, like Alice can see thefuture. Yeah, it's just like yeah,
and this person's a teacher and thatperson's a lawyer, and Alice can
see the future, and we allhave special talents, you know. And

(01:12:53):
Bella's like, oh, okay,Edward is going to take her to meet
them, and she's what if theydon't like me? What if they want
to meet you? Yea, youinto a house full of vampires and that's
what you're worried about. But coolum. Yeah, And then there's like
a tense moment when he's kind oflike dropping Bella off at home, and

(01:13:14):
Jacob shows up with his dad inthe wheelchair, and like there's a tense
moment where I was just like,I'm going to get out of here.
Yeah, And they definitely don't haveany fondness for each other. And Charlie
doesn't think at this point that it'san animal killer. He thinks, okay,
there's a murderer out there. Yeah, which, okay, finally here

(01:13:38):
we are. I mean, Bellais not piping up with any of the
information she's got. That's for daysure, so not. We're Edward's house
and they're trying to cook for her, and I love the conversation. Is
she even Italian? The other hername is Bella? It's great logic,

(01:13:59):
h and she had already ate AndI love this like moment of like,
well, I was trying to bepolite because I know you don't eat,
but then no I showed up,and of course Fellow was like it's all
great, and Edwards like she ate, You're right, and I was like,
well, thanks for throwing me underthe bus, dude. But I
just have them in my notes.I was like, Jesus, Rosalie like

(01:14:20):
yasily, just like she is sofucking pissed, and I put she is
me because she'd be like I couldtotally see having that reaction like what the
fuck are we doing here? Likewhat are you doing? And Alison Jasper
just keep being the weirdo hippie dippyweirdos that they are. Oh yeah,

(01:14:40):
I do love I love the graduationhats. Okay, So at this moment
in my notes, I was like, you know what to Jasper reminds me
of Edwards scissor Hands. Oh mygod, he's totally Edwards scissor Hands Like
he's he's very like Sis walks likehe's their newest vegetarian. That's what they

(01:15:03):
like to call themselves, or vegetarians. Um, you are spot on and
that is so true. Um,I do love when they're walking up the
stairs the graduation hats and that likethey matriculate a lot, the younger we
are or the longer we can staykind of thing. And that's a great
explanation. Um. And in Edwardsroom, like Bella's first observation, very

(01:15:25):
teen angster, nobid look you evenUm, I did love what he's like.
Well I don't sleep ever, that'sthat's like not a vampire thing.
I was like, yes, this, now, this is the superpower I
would take. Yeah, if imaginehow much you could get done. Imagine
how we think you could learn.Yes, since you could do like if

(01:15:48):
you didn't have to sleep, I'mhere for that and not be tired ever,
Yeah, that might be my superpower. If that I would pick just
to never sleep, would do allthe things, all the things and never
be tired. I don't know,but you know what, then you could
never turn your brain off ever,which true might slowly drive you insane.

(01:16:11):
Maybe you'd be a different kind oftired. Yeah, like maybe you have
to like meditate. Oh that's notfor me. Well, Bella starts that's
it. No, um, Bellastarts the CD player because remember we're like
in two thousand and eight, andthey sort of dance and she's like,

(01:16:39):
I'm not scared of you. Andthen again he like throws her on his
back like a backpack and goes runningthrough the tree tops. That's the best
way I can say to describe it. It's fucking Yoda and Luke Skywalker.
It's the strangest shit I've ever seenon Daygaba, Like Jesus Christ, what
the hell is going on? It'sjust ridiculous. Client, I should put

(01:17:00):
what is this about? Like whatis the spot? Now? I will
say cool shots when they are supposedto look like they're just sort of standing
in a treetop. Yeah, now, Bella, you're not terrified? Why
one wrong move? I would feellike I am going to kareem to my
death. Like that's but it's verybeautiful, very cool. Some of the
shots are neat um. And thenthere's like a whole like piano playings.

(01:17:24):
It's just romance, romance. We'repianoing where it's oh, isn't this great?
Um? Then police, the policeand dogs are searching with the woods
because there's a killer author right,and we see the weird strange stranger vamps
watching and uh, Mike then atschool sees Bella and it's like you and

(01:17:45):
Edward, I don't like it,so I know, Hey, tell us,
tell us how you really feel,Mike. Uh, he's pretty straightforward.
Um. I do think that thatwas a really funny line. And
there is a Stephanie Meyer cameo atthe cafe. She's sitting at the counter
and orders like a spinach salad orthe vegetarian burger or something, and it's

(01:18:06):
and the waitress goes like, okay, that'll be just a second, Stephanie,
and it's it's the book author,which like, wouldn't that be the
coolest to be, Like, youwrote a book, it's becoming a movie,
and then you get to have astupid cameo like that. I would
totally do that. Um So,Bella called her mom and she tells her
mom about Edward because of course mom'slike asking about boys, right, and

(01:18:28):
so does Mike also have the linebecause I wrote this down he looks at
you like you're something to eat.He does say that he looks because I
was just like that amused me.I was like, yes, um as
silly as he seems. His powersof observation are developing just as they should.

(01:18:48):
Yes. Uh. So she tellsmom about Edward and he you know,
and Edward just appears in her roomand he reveals that he watches her
sleep sometimes. Again not romantic,very creepy. Okay, huh, but

(01:19:12):
it seems very teenagery to think thatthis is romantic. And then they kiss.
But I have some asterisks here.It's such a slow build to the
kiss, and the whole idea issupposed to be that Edward is trying to
control himself from like literally ripping herto shreds and drinking all her blood.
But right, can you fucking imaginefilming these scenes? Can you imagine?

(01:19:41):
No, I'm not cut out forthis kind of work. God bless these
people because I can't. There's nofucking way, no way. So they're
making out and he flies off thewall like fucking spider man. I don't
know. Yeah, there's a lotof strange levitation in this movie. I

(01:20:03):
have to say that I sort offorgot about, like strange levitation. This
is another song on our album tracks, Strange Spider Monkey and the Strange Levitations.
It really is new band name,new band name. Sorry, I'm
rude, it's better that way,sorry, T shirt. God damn.

(01:20:28):
So anyway, they decide to hangout, which this is cute that they're
just like, you know what,forget that, like, let's slow our
role, let's just hang out inchit chat. And that is very I
remember those days of being able tostay up all night talking about dumb shit
and um. So the next sceneis, you know, Charlie is cleaning
his shotgun. Yep, if thisisn't going to be a grandpa, George,

(01:20:50):
move right right here, this righthere, he's cleaning his gun.
Edward wants to meet him because shewants to take bell on a date,
and he's quite proper because news flash, he's a little old fashioned, old
years old. So there's the wholeyou know, Charlie making sure she's got

(01:21:14):
the mace. You know, Bella'ssort of mortified he's cleaning the shotgun.
We also are trying to not it. They didn't play this up in the
scene, but I'm like, well, if we're really going to go with
this storyline, like he can readall of Charlie's thoughts, right, how
hellish is that they're gonna go playbaseball with edwards family because they need a

(01:21:36):
thunderstorm to play baseball? Now,the cop and Charlie should have been a
little suspicious that if it's stormy out, and Edwards says, I'm taking her
to play baseball with my family?Really, right, where are you going
to play baseball in the range?Well, it hasn't, it hasn't,

(01:21:56):
It hasn't yet, so maybe youknow, Alice knows the future son thunderstorm
is coming. You've mountains, somaybe there's some weird shit there, we
just get like effect snow, that'swhat we know, playing baseball and the
thunder and there's another more strange levitationand running and it's but it's I guess

(01:22:16):
it's it's trying to humanize them andmake them cute and right. But the
bad the bad vampires arrive. Sowe've got Victoria, the girl, Laurent,
who is very he's a very muchkind of um like and Rice like,
yes, the vampire. He's inthe wrong movie. He's supposed to

(01:22:41):
be in the interview with the vampire. Yeah, he's like it. I
like his whole vibe though, Likehe's got to be in. You're looking
at him, uh huh. Thescenes that he's in, you're looking at
him. He's got this like Idon't know, there's velvet and there's like
really there's this kind of like theway he carries himself. It's very like
regal and like, yeah, likehe should be in. And he's got

(01:23:03):
a cool voice. Yeah, yeah, who's cool. I like him.
Um, he's not utilized nearly enough. So they almost get away with having
Bella there, but of course aBeyonce breeze comes by and James smells her

(01:23:24):
now and Edward has a protective responseand James, I don't know if you
know this, but he's a trackerand I'll never leave her alone because now
it's the thrill of the hunts andEdward's reaction is just made everything worse.
Well exactly, Edward, could youcalm the fuck down for five minutes?

(01:23:45):
Uh huh, you're making everything worse. So Edward's instinct is get her Bella
the fuck out of here, andthat's it. You have to leave,
like no, like we need tolike put you in a safe house,
get out of here. She's like, um, yeah, but my dad
is at my house. And ifyou're saying that James is probably gonna go

(01:24:05):
there, he'll kill my dad.We can't do this. Yeah, And
so I like that she's worried aboutCharlie safety. She goes back to the
house, pretends like she's fighting withEdvard, has a big teenage girl drama
fight with her dad where she's packingstuff and just needs to get out of
there and she's gonna drive in thatbroke ass truck. Says that she's going

(01:24:28):
to drive to Arizona. Now,let me get this straight. Mom and
new boyfriend are in Florida she's infor but lack of about her term.
Let's say the Seattle area, right, she gonna drive that jankie ass broke
ass truck to Arizona from there.Now, I'm no Google maps, but
I'm gonna tell you right now,I feel like Charlie would have body slammed

(01:24:53):
her and cuffed her before he wouldlet her leave that house right, no
matter how often she was. Butwe need this to happen to move the
plot along. She hurts his feelingsby telling him the same thing as when
her mom left him and just reallykind of cuts him to the quick.
The Collins prepared to get Bella outof there, and Rosalie is fucking pissed.

(01:25:15):
I love her pissness. It's great, is everything. I'm thinking,
it's what the fuck are we doinghere? Yeah? Why are we protecting
her? Exactly? Like? Whatis she to us? Kind of thing?
And that's exactly what she says.What is she to me? What
do I need to help for?Ryan incomes Peter Fasconale with his very sweet

(01:25:38):
like this is family, this iswhat we do, this is who we
are. We're not monsters. Comeon, I like it. They lead
James away off in different directions.Alison Jasper are going to take Bella to
Phoenix to kind of protect her orwhatever, and Edward is going to be

(01:25:58):
doing the leading away because they thinkthat, well, James will think that
Edward's trying to protect her. Ifhe disappears, that's the route he's going
to go. So that's why they'rekind of like they're separated. So Alice
has a vision that James figures itout, like they're in a hotel and
she's like, he's coming to Arizona, and she starts drawing their vision and
that she's drawing a room, andBella identifies it as a ballet studio and

(01:26:24):
she's like, well, I usedto dance in a studio that had an
arch and like mirrors like that,Like it looked just like this, and
so they're like, Okay, thejig is up. We gotta get out
of here. So Alice and Jasperare like trying to check out and stuff,
and like idiots, they leave Bellaunattended, and she separates from them
because she called her mom and there'slike this weird response of the mom like,

(01:26:46):
oh my god, where are you? I'm worried about you, and
it makes it sound. James getson the phone and it's like, I
have your mother, right, Sonow Bella says I, or James says
I, I got your previous addressfrom the high school records. I know
exactly where where you are and I'mgonna tell your mother. This is effective.

(01:27:09):
This would cause Bella to try toget away from them, absolutely,
so she manages to say she'll meetJames alone. She's not going to be
with Alison Jasberg. She gets,she sneaks away from them, and at
the ballet studio is when we're gonnahave this final showdown. It turns out
that the mom's voice was a recordingfrom like an old home movie, right,

(01:27:30):
that he just manipulated it. Well, this makes no sense, but
here we are, right, Jamesis using a cam quarter for you kids
that don't know what a cam quarteris. Google image that shit. And
he's kind of toying with his food, right He's doing and he decides he

(01:27:54):
is so enraptured by this whole situationthat Edward's going to be so pissed.
He founder he's gonna kill her.He's going to videotape the whole thing.
So it's a lot of James isgonna get caught monologueing here. This is
every villain's downfall, right, Sohe does break Bella's leg, like we

(01:28:14):
hear a nice crack there, shescreams. Yeah, it's a compound fracture
situation. It's pretty bad. AndEdward does arrive almost just in time.
They're fighting, but James manages toget Bella's wrist bitten. Yeah, and

(01:28:35):
the rest of the Collins arrive andnow it's like vampire showdown, throwdown,
right, and poor Bella is sittinghere with her bones sticking out of her
leg and this vampire venom in herwrist and she is dying literally, So
yeah, so then he's got todecide basically while while James is being torn

(01:28:56):
apart by the others. Oh,like they glaze by the real quick,
like they're tearing him apart and goingto burn his bits and pieces, like
tearing him. I'm glad we didnot have to see any of that.
And it's all in like fuzzy like, yeah, I've taken it either way.
But it was sort of like,oh, we're just gonna put that

(01:29:17):
in portrait mode and have it sortof blurred out in the background, right
in the background, yeah, whilehim and while Edward and Carlyle are having
this deep conversation and isn't Alice comesover there too, right, because she's
like she does and right, andshe says, I've seen this happen.
It's going to happen, and Edward'slike, no, it's not. Yeah,

(01:29:42):
because yeah, Edwards got to kindof decide do I turn her to
save her or do I let herdie? Right? And but Carlyle says,
like there is another option, likeyou could suck the vampire like almost
to die and it might let herstay alive and stay human. We could

(01:30:03):
try it, but you have tobe able to like stop. Yeah,
so we have to have that weirdscene which we knew was coming. This
is a vampire movie. We've beenhere before. That's fine. What else
could they have done? It's notlike he was, you know. That's
fine. So Bella wakes up inthe hospital with her mom and they told
her some bananas fallen down the stairscover story then and fell out, fell

(01:30:28):
and went through a window. Shefell downstairs and went through a window,
is what they said. I understandthat. She's like, you have seen
a few cues that she's clutsy.But also, damn, I'm going to
tell you right now as a mom, I've never met these fucking weird Collins.
Right, you're giving me all theinfo. Okay, okay, well

(01:30:49):
we'll see what I will be interviewingmy daughter when she wakes up, and
we'll see what this story really is. Because what this sounds insane? Yeah,
it feels like very like okay,oh your t now. We I'm
sure as we have seen with Edward, the glaze of the charm that happened

(01:31:13):
on the chi when everybody meets thesepeople, that's probably why they have been
able to survive for so long.And to be fair, if he can
read her thoughts, he knows whather doubts are and is able to like
swoop in with the question the answerto her question rightly, So let's what
are we gonna do there? Itis they told a cover story. Edward

(01:31:35):
tells Bella she should live in Floridaand get away from them, Like,
this is the best advice I cangive you. This is a bad,
bad, bad idea. Yeah,but she doesn't want to do that because
she loves Yeah, they're in love. So back in Forks, they're gonna
go to prom, because where elsewould we land of art the prom?

(01:31:58):
This is a high school movie,don't forget. Edward drops her at the
door to park, and Jacob iskind of hanging out to say hello and
see her, and it's like hey, and he's parked in the Edward's park
in the car, and he says, well, I have a message from
my dad. He says, stayaway from the Collins. He said no.
He says, break up with yourboyfriend, or break up with your

(01:32:21):
boyfriend, that's right, and laughabout it. Yeah, and you could
tell Jacob plays it like I feelstupid, but my dad says break up
with the stud word, you know, And Jacob's got the like Google eyes
fabella, so you know. Andthen I just, you know, we're

(01:32:41):
at the end, and I justhad a thought and I just wrote it
in my notes to ask, Likeit's going to pain me to ask this
question because I almost live this exactlife. But like, if you were
let's not say Edward. Let's pretendyou're Rosalie. Okay, let's identify with
her. Could you fucking hang outwith high school kids forever? Like you

(01:33:02):
have to keep restarting and pretending tobe in high school. Well, that's
probably why they don't hang out withanybody because they're probably and probably why they
look so pissed all the time.True, but it's like there's just so
much bullshit that goes with that,Like what I mean, I am stuck

(01:33:23):
in high school until I'm at leastfifty five, Like I I mean,
I'm hanging out with high schoolers allday, and it's it has days when
I'm like sometimes, look, thereare times when it's amazing, like my
kids give me energy, they keepme going, like they are so funny,

(01:33:44):
they're bright, they're cute. Butthere are days when holy hell,
what am I even listening to?I can't I need you to just stop
talking. This is this has goneon long enough. I can't not today.
This is stupid. I just likethat. I don't know, there's
a level of hell that this sortof feels like, yeah, like I

(01:34:09):
don't see the appeal, but Imean, like we said, I mean,
I get it well, and Iwould think that this might be like
they're all doing this on behalf ofCarlyle, because Carlyle can really only be
a doctor, establish himself and staysomewhere for a few years. If they're
going to play this like we're afamily thing, right, if the rest

(01:34:31):
of them seem really young. Youknow, otherwise you can't just come and
be a doctor for like a yearand then move on and go be a
doct You'll never have a decent practice, Like, you'll never get to do
the things you want to do rightbecause in actuality, I mean, they
have a very limited amount of timewhere they could be someplace. So if
they're starting, say like they're startingat freshman year of high school, so

(01:34:57):
you've got high school and then possiblyyou could get away with college. I
mean that would maybe be about eightyears before people are like, wow,
you really look great for your age, Carl. I don't know though,
if high school movies have taught usanything. You could be Luke Perry playing
Dylan McKay in your god blessed thirties. So you know, maybe just got

(01:35:23):
a really good I cream. Youknow, you never break out, No,
you never get any hormonal acne.You're just blessed. I don't know,
but it's yeah. So they dancetheir dance at the prem in the
gazine bo when everybody magically leaves sothat they're alone and they have the very

(01:35:45):
intense I want to be turned,to be a vampire and be with you
forever. I mean, the parallelsbetween sex and becoming a vampire are just
too much in the scene, Likeit's just too much, like could you
just club me in the head?You know? It's yeah, well,

(01:36:11):
and it's I will say it iskind of a cute scene, like the
fake out, like as if he'sgonna bite her and then he does,
right, you know, And it'ssort of like this idea that he's not
questioning anymore whether he can control himselfaround her since he already lived through drinking
her blood not killing her. Sobut we also see at the end that

(01:36:36):
that Victoria is there and she knowsthat they killed James, and so this
isn't over dot dot dot, sothere's gonna be more so overall. I
don't know where I'm going with thatsense. What do you think I mean?

(01:37:00):
For as ridiculous as it is,I mean, I did enjoy watching
it, but like I don't hateit. No, I don't hate it,
which I don't hate it, butit I just it's one of those
where it's like it really is inparts in some ways so bad it makes
it good kind of or it's like, I don't know if this movie the

(01:37:26):
problem is it's like the shine wearsoff, Like it wasn't this bad like
the first like two times that Iprobably saw it, but then like when
I had to sit down and watchit now and take notes, Holy hell,
like lipstick on a pig. Idon't know what happened here, But

(01:37:48):
I don't hate it. Like Idon't know, I don't hate it.
Maybe it's kind like the Pacific Northwest. I think I love the scenery.
I don't know, Oh, Ilove I do think that it was really
well cast. That's a big partof it. If this had not been
well cast, this movie, wewouldn't ever have even talked about it.

(01:38:10):
It wouldn't have been a thing.But yeah, they caught like actors that
were like kind of hot shit ina way, you know, like with
Robert Passon being in like Harry Potterand like, I mean, they really
caught him right at the you know, because this was apparently his first movie
where he had to real quick figureout how to do an American accent,

(01:38:31):
which is part of why I thinkhe sounds weird in some of the ways
when he talks and you kind ofmaybe write it off as being old timey,
yeah, you know, but Iwonder if it's a little bit like
he's trying real hard to do theAmerican accent because this is his first movie
where I had to do it.But I think the true magic here is

(01:38:55):
the cast. Like the cast isreally good. Chemistry, I mean really,
all the characters is very good.Like I feel like every I feel
um the casting for every single oneof the vampires, now Jaspers again,
like every time I looked at him, I just couldn't take him seriously.

(01:39:16):
But I don't necessarily think it wasbad casting. I mean from from the
move or from the books, hewas this like real weird, awkward,
Like I think he's not supposed tobe as polished as the rest of them
because he's the newest, right,like the one, the newest one that
got turned and is adopting this lifestyleof what we basically eat animal blood and

(01:39:42):
we don't kill humans. Yeah,like me, instead of looking like I
mean, I don't know, insteadof looking like he's trying to hold in
a fart or not vomit, likemaybe if it looked more like he was
in pain, but because I meanmaybe that's exactly. I don't know.
I think, you know, insome ways it kind of works like and
I do think and he gets better, like because he as the movie goes

(01:40:04):
on, and then it works likeyeah he doesn't you know, it does
it does good? But I doI think that, Um, I think
that's a big part. Whoever didthe casting here is the real MVP,
because because like Charlie as the dad, like Billy Burke Burke, which yeah,

(01:40:27):
it's his name is Billy Burke.And then there's a character named Billy
Black, which is the Jacob's dad, which is very strange to try to
figure out and remember, but hisreal name is Billy Burke, and yeah
he's great. Taylor Lautner's great,like it's and there's a lot of chemistry
between christ and Stewart and Robert Pattinson. I mean they were well, whether
it was for publicity or what theywere like dating for a while. And

(01:40:48):
then um, I mean and AnnaKendrick, I want to say, way
back when when the when I firstsaw the movie, I had read somewhere
that like she acts, she washoping to play Alice, and like read
for Alice, and that was thepart that she wanted and like she's just
great as Jessica, Like it's perfect, Like that's how it needed to be

(01:41:10):
because Ana Kendric is so funny,like she has a great delivery of humor
that like she's perfect for it.So like the casting is truly great.
I do think that's a big piece. And then it makes it so that
because the casting was so great inthe first movie, you're sold on like
going to the next movie because you'relike, well, yeah, let's give

(01:41:31):
it another like as yeah, asridiculous if the story gets and even in
later movies, the movies do getbetter. I feel like Kristen Stewart's acting
and some of this was very hardto watch. And I don't know if
that was just the fault of maybethe direction she was given, because I

(01:41:56):
don't necessarily think she's a bad actress, but I just think that some of
the choices that were made were notgreat and just ended up looking not ended
up looking awkward, but not ina good way that helped the character.
I do think that I do rememberfeeling like when the movies came out and

(01:42:20):
I was trying to catch up andread the books or something like. However,
the order of operations went there.I do sort of remember thinking that
maybe they were trying to do somethingwith the movie because when you read the
books, Bella as a character canbe pretty annoying. It's kind of like
when you read Harry Potter, howHermione is way more annoying in the books

(01:42:42):
than she is in the movies.Yeah, but it's smart the way they
did it, and I think theywere trying to achieve the same thing with
whatever direction Kristen Stewart was getting.But it doesn't quite it doesn't turn out
quite that way. Like the Bellacharacter is kind of she's pretty annoying in
the books, and so it's likethey tried to fix it, but it
didn't work in this in the movieversion. So I agree, like some

(01:43:06):
of the Bellast stuff is a littlebut yeah, I'm not sure how you
would fix it, but I agreeit's a little it's pretty clunky, like
it just feels not quite polished.But it's the same thing with like poor
fucking Robert Pattinson and all that glaring. It's so I just kept trying to

(01:43:27):
picture if this is what it feelslike to watch it in the movie form.
How many cut takes were there,Like, how much glaring did he
have to do? That's the realquestion. Glare harder, right, like,
glare at him like you're really mad, No more mad, glare at

(01:43:48):
him that they get scared enough theyrun away. Okay, yeah, can
I make my eye twitch a little? You know? It's like I don't.
It's very um. They did thebest they could with it. Yeah,
I don't know. I don't hateit. I don't have it right.

(01:44:09):
I mean, it's not going tobe one that I'm going to be
putting on repeat to watch, butI do think it is one of those
that would It's I think it'd behilarious to watch with like a group of
like girlfriends with like a bottle ofline and just oh, I think someday
it's going to be hilarious to watchit with Audrey and be like can you
believe this shit? Like this isnuts. She's like when I was when

(01:44:31):
I was watching it, She's like, oh, I've heard of Twilight,
mom, and I was like,shut up, you don't even know.
I was like, yeah, okay, nine year old you've heard it to
Wilight? What from YouTube? Kids? Um? But yeah, So I
don't know, I'd say I don'tthink this one is gonna age great like
it's it certainly has already has it. I mean, but I don't know.

(01:44:55):
I don't know who this is for. I think you know, I
think you it's got to be.What will keep this alive are the young
adult readers that discover the books,they read them, and then they go
find the movie. I think itis going to be through the readership that
this stays alive, not the cinematicsituation. Yeah, but it. I

(01:45:18):
will say I was looking forward tohaving this conversation and like going through the
note because the whole time I wouldjust be like laughing, like I can't
even believe I got to write thisdown, like this is insane, Like
what is Andrew? And I wasthinking, like Andrew is probably going to
say these same exact like I'm diving. Could have I couldn't. We could

(01:45:39):
have lift lifted each other's notes rightout of absolutely yeah, we probably could
have liked Yeah, lined them uppoint for point and there they are.
So you know, overall, I'mnot I'm not sad we did it.
I'm not either. It was prettyfunny, it was pretty entertaining. Yeah.

(01:46:00):
I needed it. I needed tobe like, oh, let's give
Twilight a fucking world. Why not? You know? All right, well,
I guess it's time to wrap itup. You know, Thank you
guys so much for listening. Ifyou want to let us know what your
little heart fluttered and saw when yousaw Twilight in the theater or on rental

(01:46:24):
or on Netflix, pop over ontoFacebook or Instagram on Facebook at fourteen,
going on forty podcast Instagram or atfourteen going on forty pod, or shoot
us an email on Gmail fourteen goingon forty pod at gmail dot com.
I'm gonna put something on the Spotifyplaylist of fourteen on forty dams. However,

(01:46:45):
I do feel like the music fromthis one is definitely going to stand
apart from some of the bebop andmusic that's on the rest of that playlist,
So we'll see what I can find. But there's some good there's some
good stuff on this this soundtrack,so let's see what I can and do.
Oh my gosh. All right,well, you know, stay out
of the woods, you wear ofvampires, get vaccinated. That's my final

(01:47:10):
thoughts. I could kurk walk yourhands, please please do

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Episode 39 - Twilight

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Episode 39 - Twilight