April 1, 2025 • 16 mins
Life is life. Decisions lead to results. Actions lead to reactions. James Lott Jr talks about taking ownership of your life and realizing you are not victim. alottofhelp.com
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hello, Welcome to another edition of a Lot of Help
with Me. James lo Jr.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
I'm going to certified life coach in several areas, professional organizer,
and have a doctor and I'm also a regular human
being who's in his fifties who's lived some life.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
All that swirl together.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
It's going to be talked about through this topic that
I wanted to bring up with you because I have
so many friends going through this right now. Things aren't
happening to you now before we'll go why it happened
to me? What I mean by that is, yes, on
the surface, something is happening in your life. It's affecting you.
(00:42):
That's done.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
Yes, However I view it differently. I view it.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
It took me forty years to get there, but I
view it differently. It's not that it's people are like
everything's to you. Things are a result of action reaction. Yes, No,
every step you take leads to another step that leads
(01:06):
to something. So I'll explain as I have friends who
are going through stuff and they're just like why me,
Why me? And we all do that sometimes like why
me as a natural thing, like why does this happened
to me? And it just sucks. So it sucks, but
I had to learn. Things are the results of things
(01:27):
you put out there. Now, not saying everything is your
fault and that you know, oh my god, to get
all on. I'm just saying that just how life works.
Every action has a reaction. Every there's a result to everything,
just a result.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
So just living life.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
It's just an analogy that if you walk down the street
that straight line and just keep going and going, you're
going to encounter all kinds of people. Now you might
be asking for all kinds of people or why to
meet all kinds of people, but you're going to meet
lots of people because you're actually the outside walking down
the street. You're also gonna get tired at some point
(02:04):
because your movement. Now you may collapse. Not your fault,
so to speak. It's just that it's you walk so
much your body couldn't take it anymore. That's just the
result of you walking. Or you get really energized and
do great for five miles. You could when you walk
(02:24):
down the street, you run it. You may stop in
a store. Your DESI isn't stop in that store now,
owens you up to whatever is inside that store. See
what I'm saying it's like, it's just it's just life.
There's a simplified down to just life that like you
get in a car, you choose to drive, you're in
whatever that means to all the other drivers out there.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
And it's just it's if you live life, life will happen.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
That's that's kind of like my my number one of
things like it, Well, this is gonna happen. So whether
it's happening to you or somebody else, or don't happen
to you today us tomorrow, it's just it's just that's life.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
Now.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Of course we have emotions and fees. You can be
that callous just like, oh, just life, that's what it is.
But there's ways you can kind of turn it around,
I think, because if you have the mentality of well
it's a victim mentality basically it's happening to me, It's
always happening to me. This is happening to me. I
can't believe it. You could be flabbergasted and shocked. How
(03:27):
much can happen in one time. You've trust me, I've
had that where you're like cheese and crackers. These five
things happened in the last week, and it just won't stop.
I had that happen a few years ago. It was
my stepfather got sick, my mother got sick, my two
aunts got sick, all in a row in a short time.
It's just like, okay, what is it going to end?
What is not happening to me is that they're all older,
(03:49):
they all had something happened to them. I'm in their lives,
I'm close to them.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
So there you have it. I offerends.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
You have no family, no family, start offends. You have
no siblings. You know idea what that means. There are
things happen in their lives. We're in a couples. I'm
not in a couple. Things happen differently.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
They happen to me.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
It's just it's it's it's taking it. It's taking it
as not taking it all on. You already have the
emotion of whatever's happening to you, but you take on
your added weight of it's. Oh my god, it just
keeps happenings. I keep It's just me. Some cultures will
say you and practice to say you bring in what
(04:33):
you call out, you get what you give, You put
yourself the whole thing, right, That's true.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Some stuff that happens to us. It is.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
It is self inflicted nine minute. I mean things in
my life like if I made it, if I made
a different decision, that wouldn't have happened. If I had
done this after I can't after that decision was made,
I would have gotten over. In fact, like there's things
that I'm of course you know you learn right on time,
but I know this shouldn' things that they were on me.
(05:03):
I refuse to see certain people for who they were,
so I get them two or three chances. That's that's
a big thing. Give two or three chances, and they
still do you wrong every single time, and depending on
how close or how much you like them, because it's
the nice ones. Here's something for you. When the nice
(05:23):
ones do something wrong to people you let you love,
you think are so nice and sweet, do something wrong,
you're like, oh, that's harder. The ones who are just
told dix and just and just like straight up just
were that's easier. People are mean, that's easier. But if
they're not mean, they started acting up. Everbody goes to
(05:43):
their stuffy, goes through stuff. I have a cousin that
I cut off after a while because I was sick
I needed her. I never asked for help from her,
after I've helped her a million times in her life.
I didn't ask for help, she offered help and it
didn't show up. Never apologize, never never an answer. I mean,
(06:04):
I Lucy was sitting here at my house waiting for
the first to come. Don't touch it for months. Then
when I says, doesn't. Even when I'm like I want
to talk to her, She's like, I don't. I'm just
I'm just here to drop off with my sister and
runs away and like wow. And then you're lands like
I don't know why James don't like me and then
starts talking crap about me to people. I mean, just
there's just it could get bigger and bigger and bigger,
(06:24):
and that made it hard. You friends like, oh, my sister,
this is my favorite cousin, this is somebody I love
very much.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
This is crazy, and this is happening.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
We have friends in common, and we have people in common,
and I'm like, this is it's It'd be easier if
somebody didn't like but I end up having to cut
the person out. I said, I forgive you and all that,
and then I was able to tell them all that
I was like, but I'm like, I don't trust you
anymore and trust is gone, but I'm not taking it
as and have its home.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
What was me?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
I'm just like people change, People have their own shit
going on. People get their own lives going on with
that stuff going on, So it may have nothing to
do with me. By that person did what they did,
I'm gonna take that on either, and I ain't do
anything in them, so I don't do anything. I'm dropped
with my own business. So it's kind of like you could,
you could, That's that's what I mean by that. So
(07:15):
I feel lighter. So when I let this person go, yeah,
I heard added more than the loss. But I'm good
with my decision. Like, yeah, that's fine. I'm good with that.
I'm good with that decision I didn't. Yeah, I'm good.
So I mean, for me, it's crazy, right, I can
(07:42):
real the whole time. And if these are actors, collaborators,
or are people who just don't communicate a big personal communication,
that's me. Communication is key to me. It's very It's
gonna be a simple communication. It could be anything. I'm
so easy, breezy cover girl. I want I want to
work with everybody I want to buy to work with me.
I want to do I want to do fine. So
when some people do me literally do me wrong, you know,
(08:07):
don't show up on time to things, don't show up
at all to meetings where it puts everybody and you know,
all the other actors and Jeopardy and waste their time,
and I have to find a fight. Somebody lasses like,
you're you're just causing disruption, not just me, to others.
And I talked to you about it.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
You apologize, I'm sorry, We'll have it again, and then
you give them their chance.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
They do it again. There's two people in particular, like
I say their names obviously, who I liked personally liked them,
and one was going through a lot of stuff personal
in their personal life, and I was like, I was
trying to give some support there, but they kept interfering
with the process. And let them go and they try
(08:48):
to come back and they still That's why I try.
I had to block them on their social medium, like
they keep trying to come back. I'm like, no, you
give me wrong, like five times, six times.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I can't give six chances. I'm sorry, Just go somewhere else.
I gotta people just go somewhere else. So it's fair.
So it's it's very hard because I liked them, so
it's very hard to let people go. But but I
don't want to sit in the victimhood and go why
it's all happening to me? It just I have these shows.
You reach out to people, and everyone had. Creatives have
(09:20):
their own brains, and creatives have their own ways and stuff.
It's just as how as how when you reach when
you reach out.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
That's how.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
That's how it works. You know, Creatives think a little
differently than business people. It's a whole different mindset. Now
everybody's gonna think the way you do. Also as all
of it. I mean, so I once I kind of
let that all in. Well, okay, when things happen, I'm
able to be level headed on most sets and kind
(09:49):
of navigate that. I have one friend I just it's
it's been the same story for like five, six, seven,
eight years, And I always feel bad for that person
because I'm totally team that person. I'm like, oh my god,
you know, and they're and they're so smart and they're
not wrong as something happens to them, but they I
(10:10):
think there's an other thing that happens where you're afraid
to move on, You're afraid to make that big decision.
It's scary. Oh, it's totally scary at first. We're just
tal making big decisions. It comes easier and easier it does.
For some people, it's they think they want this. They're
(10:32):
hoping that those people will change the way they act
towards them. They aren't even be great. There are folks
wo don't like confrontation, don't I know one likes conversation,
but I don't. Folks who really try to avoid that,
and they're just like, can we just can't we sorry? Sorry, kids,
they really can't let go of this idea or this
(10:57):
person or this thing. It's like, if you let go
and just go forward and do what you need to
do and strive some of people who are really who
really will support you. Yeah, I know that there's you know,
in this business that I work in, the in media,
it's tough to have support and it is oh my gosh,
(11:18):
wait to get anybody to retweet your thing or repost
your story, or help you with a movie or help
you with it some for it. It can be tough
sometimes finding people. But I think it's impossible. You can
find people, and you have to just keep looking to
vet them. Look and you'll find the right people. Right
folks will come into your life, and sometimes you should
(11:38):
look around. They might to be there already. I just
haven't utilized them or appreciated them enough. They're already here
in your life. And all you're hearing about is the opposite.
No one wants to help me do my movie, don't
want to help me do my play, don't want to
help me do my blank Right, I'll find people to
work with. And it's a mixed bag because I'm because
I'm putting myself out Going to my earlier statement, I'm
putting myself out there. So I put myself out there
(12:02):
being one hundred people, about forty of them are gonna
be are gonna be tired, but the other sixty maybe wonderful.
And it's it's just kind of how that works, you
know what I mean, Like, it's that's kind of how
that works. That's that's kind of the odds of life.
If I'll put myself out there, then nothing will get done.
And so yeah, maybe you'll protect yourself and you won't
(12:23):
have anybody, but then you're doing everything yourself. You have
nobody you're working with, but that's the world. No man's
an island. You should be out there, you know. So
when you put yourself out there, you're gonna encounter all
kinds of personalities, backgrounds, relations. You know, you're gona gonna
you're just gonna encounter them. And a lot of times
I try to be people where they are if I can,
but sometimes it doesn't work either. And sometimes you gotta
(12:44):
get tough. You gotta set up for yourself. You gotta
say certain things sometimes and it's that's not easy either
at first, but I can do it. I can do it,
no shame. And it's ways that we're doing another show
though there's ways to do it too that's not super
confrontational or whatever. You know, you can't told somebody else
thinks and how they react. But at least on your end,
(13:05):
you know you did your best because because you's something
when it comes to confronting someone. What is the outcome
you want? What's the outcome you hope to achieve on
some level. That's home on the show, But that's by
just one people got in the mindset. It's happening to me.
They all keep doing this to me. They're like, no,
it's that you you are relying on probably relying on
(13:25):
the wrong people. You might be in the wrong city,
you might be in the wrong profession, you might be
living in the wrong part of the city, a wrong
part of the profession. Maybe you're not opening your mind
wide enough. Maybe you're richid in some of your thoughts,
Like these are all things you have to ask yourself,
like really look at yourself and go, okay, But if
(13:48):
you think I've done nothing wrong and I just people
should people should just help me. And that's it. I
don't know why not doing it? I can't help you
mean to me, you your mind's closed. And one of
the friends I just talked about, but he did his
own thing and it was wonderful and I was so
proud of him, and it's very it was very successful.
(14:10):
I was like, see, there you go. You took control
of it. You stop waiting for other people and you
just did it. But also, I you know, I also
you know it comes to life. Some of us are
super overachievers, go getters.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
That's me.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
I am over achiever. I sell of us aren't. Some
of us are either just talent where we just where
we shine as the talent of whatever that is. Not
everybody's a songwriter, Not everybody's a producer, everybody's a director.
You know, you gotta think about the kind stuff that.
Not everybody is a showrunner, like you went on what
you're doing. Everybody's manager. Some people like just being being told,
(14:50):
go here, do this, do that. They got it, here's
your work for it today. I don't know what I'm
talked about. There who just like they like to know
what they expected of them, and they just form.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
They do it. They hit the markers and they got it.
Not wrong at all.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
There's just room for all of us. But some of
us we're over achievers. We just gotta go out there.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
I do.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
But if I can't go out to do myself, I'll
find somebody. I ask a great folks surrounding me. So
I'm good. But but again, we are human, and I
know that.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
Folks.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
It's easy to fall into that why me or woe
is me? Or why this is always happening to me?
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Mentality.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
We got to try to fight that every chance we get.
It's because it's just life. Life happens. We need to
examine every time something happens. Maybe why it happened, what
part do I play in it? And how can I
make this not happen again? Or try to it not
gonna happen again. You can't predict the future, but you
can take steps to try to. You know, you know,
(15:49):
how's your lesson for today? A lot of help is
on Tuesdays. We try to do We try to these
episodes every Tuesday for you here on jail j Media,
audio and video. A lot of help dot Thomas the website.
I have a life coach. Also, I want to start
I'm working all this year. We want to post all
my curriculum. I teach courses. I have all kinds of
stuff that I do. Comes to media and self and
(16:10):
getting started organization. Whilst professional organizer, I am for higher
virtual or in person both works. I'm in the LA area,
but I have traveled. I also have two books out,
one on productivity and one getting Started. Both their Tuo
Organizer Universe books and they're on you, They're on YouTube,
(16:32):
They're on Amazon, Kindle, airbag. It's just Happen James on
Junior and you'll see all my books. I have more
coming and I'm working on my website, working on I'm
working on kind stuff this year. The last couple of
years I was busy. Take your family, which is very important,
and now I'm getting back to me. Everyone please take
carry yourselves, have a good week. I'll see you next time.
Hello, Welcome to another edition of a Lot of Help
with Me. James lo Jr.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
I'm going to certified life coach in several areas, professional organizer,
and have a doctor and I'm also a regular human
being who's in his fifties who's lived some life.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
All that swirl together.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
It's going to be talked about through this topic that
I wanted to bring up with you because I have
so many friends going through this right now. Things aren't
happening to you now before we'll go why it happened
to me? What I mean by that is, yes, on
the surface, something is happening in your life. It's affecting you.
(00:42):
That's done.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
Yes, However I view it differently. I view it.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
It took me forty years to get there, but I
view it differently. It's not that it's people are like
everything's to you. Things are a result of action reaction. Yes, No,
every step you take leads to another step that leads
(01:06):
to something. So I'll explain as I have friends who
are going through stuff and they're just like why me,
Why me? And we all do that sometimes like why
me as a natural thing, like why does this happened
to me? And it just sucks. So it sucks, but
I had to learn. Things are the results of things
(01:27):
you put out there. Now, not saying everything is your
fault and that you know, oh my god, to get
all on. I'm just saying that just how life works.
Every action has a reaction. Every there's a result to everything,
just a result.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
So just living life.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
It's just an analogy that if you walk down the street
that straight line and just keep going and going, you're
going to encounter all kinds of people. Now you might
be asking for all kinds of people or why to
meet all kinds of people, but you're going to meet
lots of people because you're actually the outside walking down
the street. You're also gonna get tired at some point
(02:04):
because your movement. Now you may collapse. Not your fault,
so to speak. It's just that it's you walk so
much your body couldn't take it anymore. That's just the
result of you walking. Or you get really energized and
do great for five miles. You could when you walk
(02:24):
down the street, you run it. You may stop in
a store. Your DESI isn't stop in that store now,
owens you up to whatever is inside that store. See
what I'm saying it's like, it's just it's just life.
There's a simplified down to just life that like you
get in a car, you choose to drive, you're in
whatever that means to all the other drivers out there.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
And it's just it's if you live life, life will happen.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
That's that's kind of like my my number one of
things like it, Well, this is gonna happen. So whether
it's happening to you or somebody else, or don't happen
to you today us tomorrow, it's just it's just that's life.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
Now.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Of course we have emotions and fees. You can be
that callous just like, oh, just life, that's what it is.
But there's ways you can kind of turn it around,
I think, because if you have the mentality of well
it's a victim mentality basically it's happening to me, It's
always happening to me. This is happening to me. I
can't believe it. You could be flabbergasted and shocked. How
(03:27):
much can happen in one time. You've trust me, I've
had that where you're like cheese and crackers. These five
things happened in the last week, and it just won't stop.
I had that happen a few years ago. It was
my stepfather got sick, my mother got sick, my two
aunts got sick, all in a row in a short time.
It's just like, okay, what is it going to end?
What is not happening to me is that they're all older,
(03:49):
they all had something happened to them. I'm in their lives,
I'm close to them.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
So there you have it. I offerends.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
You have no family, no family, start offends. You have
no siblings. You know idea what that means. There are
things happen in their lives. We're in a couples. I'm
not in a couple. Things happen differently.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
They happen to me.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
It's just it's it's it's taking it. It's taking it
as not taking it all on. You already have the
emotion of whatever's happening to you, but you take on
your added weight of it's. Oh my god, it just
keeps happenings. I keep It's just me. Some cultures will
say you and practice to say you bring in what
(04:33):
you call out, you get what you give, You put
yourself the whole thing, right, That's true.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Some stuff that happens to us. It is.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
It is self inflicted nine minute. I mean things in
my life like if I made it, if I made
a different decision, that wouldn't have happened. If I had
done this after I can't after that decision was made,
I would have gotten over. In fact, like there's things
that I'm of course you know you learn right on time,
but I know this shouldn' things that they were on me.
(05:03):
I refuse to see certain people for who they were,
so I get them two or three chances. That's that's
a big thing. Give two or three chances, and they
still do you wrong every single time, and depending on
how close or how much you like them, because it's
the nice ones. Here's something for you. When the nice
(05:23):
ones do something wrong to people you let you love,
you think are so nice and sweet, do something wrong,
you're like, oh, that's harder. The ones who are just
told dix and just and just like straight up just
were that's easier. People are mean, that's easier. But if
they're not mean, they started acting up. Everbody goes to
(05:43):
their stuffy, goes through stuff. I have a cousin that
I cut off after a while because I was sick
I needed her. I never asked for help from her,
after I've helped her a million times in her life.
I didn't ask for help, she offered help and it
didn't show up. Never apologize, never never an answer. I mean,
(06:04):
I Lucy was sitting here at my house waiting for
the first to come. Don't touch it for months. Then
when I says, doesn't. Even when I'm like I want
to talk to her, She's like, I don't. I'm just
I'm just here to drop off with my sister and
runs away and like wow. And then you're lands like
I don't know why James don't like me and then
starts talking crap about me to people. I mean, just
there's just it could get bigger and bigger and bigger,
(06:24):
and that made it hard. You friends like, oh, my sister,
this is my favorite cousin, this is somebody I love
very much.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
This is crazy, and this is happening.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
We have friends in common, and we have people in common,
and I'm like, this is it's It'd be easier if
somebody didn't like but I end up having to cut
the person out. I said, I forgive you and all that,
and then I was able to tell them all that
I was like, but I'm like, I don't trust you
anymore and trust is gone, but I'm not taking it
as and have its home.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
What was me?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
I'm just like people change, People have their own shit
going on. People get their own lives going on with
that stuff going on, So it may have nothing to
do with me. By that person did what they did,
I'm gonna take that on either, and I ain't do
anything in them, so I don't do anything. I'm dropped
with my own business. So it's kind of like you could,
you could, That's that's what I mean by that. So
(07:15):
I feel lighter. So when I let this person go, yeah,
I heard added more than the loss. But I'm good
with my decision. Like, yeah, that's fine. I'm good with that.
I'm good with that decision I didn't. Yeah, I'm good.
So I mean, for me, it's crazy, right, I can
(07:42):
real the whole time. And if these are actors, collaborators,
or are people who just don't communicate a big personal communication,
that's me. Communication is key to me. It's very It's
gonna be a simple communication. It could be anything. I'm
so easy, breezy cover girl. I want I want to
work with everybody I want to buy to work with me.
I want to do I want to do fine. So
when some people do me literally do me wrong, you know,
(08:07):
don't show up on time to things, don't show up
at all to meetings where it puts everybody and you know,
all the other actors and Jeopardy and waste their time,
and I have to find a fight. Somebody lasses like,
you're you're just causing disruption, not just me, to others.
And I talked to you about it.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
You apologize, I'm sorry, We'll have it again, and then
you give them their chance.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
They do it again. There's two people in particular, like
I say their names obviously, who I liked personally liked them,
and one was going through a lot of stuff personal
in their personal life, and I was like, I was
trying to give some support there, but they kept interfering
with the process. And let them go and they try
(08:48):
to come back and they still That's why I try.
I had to block them on their social medium, like
they keep trying to come back. I'm like, no, you
give me wrong, like five times, six times.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I can't give six chances. I'm sorry, Just go somewhere else.
I gotta people just go somewhere else. So it's fair.
So it's it's very hard because I liked them, so
it's very hard to let people go. But but I
don't want to sit in the victimhood and go why
it's all happening to me? It just I have these shows.
You reach out to people, and everyone had. Creatives have
(09:20):
their own brains, and creatives have their own ways and stuff.
It's just as how as how when you reach when
you reach out.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
That's how.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
That's how it works. You know, Creatives think a little
differently than business people. It's a whole different mindset. Now
everybody's gonna think the way you do. Also as all
of it. I mean, so I once I kind of
let that all in. Well, okay, when things happen, I'm
able to be level headed on most sets and kind
(09:49):
of navigate that. I have one friend I just it's
it's been the same story for like five, six, seven,
eight years, And I always feel bad for that person
because I'm totally team that person. I'm like, oh my god,
you know, and they're and they're so smart and they're
not wrong as something happens to them, but they I
(10:10):
think there's an other thing that happens where you're afraid
to move on, You're afraid to make that big decision.
It's scary. Oh, it's totally scary at first. We're just
tal making big decisions. It comes easier and easier it does.
For some people, it's they think they want this. They're
(10:32):
hoping that those people will change the way they act
towards them. They aren't even be great. There are folks
wo don't like confrontation, don't I know one likes conversation,
but I don't. Folks who really try to avoid that,
and they're just like, can we just can't we sorry? Sorry, kids,
they really can't let go of this idea or this
(10:57):
person or this thing. It's like, if you let go
and just go forward and do what you need to
do and strive some of people who are really who
really will support you. Yeah, I know that there's you know,
in this business that I work in, the in media,
it's tough to have support and it is oh my gosh,
(11:18):
wait to get anybody to retweet your thing or repost
your story, or help you with a movie or help
you with it some for it. It can be tough
sometimes finding people. But I think it's impossible. You can
find people, and you have to just keep looking to
vet them. Look and you'll find the right people. Right
folks will come into your life, and sometimes you should
(11:38):
look around. They might to be there already. I just
haven't utilized them or appreciated them enough. They're already here
in your life. And all you're hearing about is the opposite.
No one wants to help me do my movie, don't
want to help me do my play, don't want to
help me do my blank Right, I'll find people to
work with. And it's a mixed bag because I'm because
I'm putting myself out Going to my earlier statement, I'm
putting myself out there. So I put myself out there
(12:02):
being one hundred people, about forty of them are gonna
be are gonna be tired, but the other sixty maybe wonderful.
And it's it's just kind of how that works, you
know what I mean, Like, it's that's kind of how
that works. That's that's kind of the odds of life.
If I'll put myself out there, then nothing will get done.
And so yeah, maybe you'll protect yourself and you won't
(12:23):
have anybody, but then you're doing everything yourself. You have
nobody you're working with, but that's the world. No man's
an island. You should be out there, you know. So
when you put yourself out there, you're gonna encounter all
kinds of personalities, backgrounds, relations. You know, you're gona gonna
you're just gonna encounter them. And a lot of times
I try to be people where they are if I can,
but sometimes it doesn't work either. And sometimes you gotta
(12:44):
get tough. You gotta set up for yourself. You gotta
say certain things sometimes and it's that's not easy either
at first, but I can do it. I can do it,
no shame. And it's ways that we're doing another show
though there's ways to do it too that's not super
confrontational or whatever. You know, you can't told somebody else
thinks and how they react. But at least on your end,
(13:05):
you know you did your best because because you's something
when it comes to confronting someone. What is the outcome
you want? What's the outcome you hope to achieve on
some level. That's home on the show, But that's by
just one people got in the mindset. It's happening to me.
They all keep doing this to me. They're like, no,
it's that you you are relying on probably relying on
(13:25):
the wrong people. You might be in the wrong city,
you might be in the wrong profession, you might be
living in the wrong part of the city, a wrong
part of the profession. Maybe you're not opening your mind
wide enough. Maybe you're richid in some of your thoughts,
Like these are all things you have to ask yourself,
like really look at yourself and go, okay, But if
(13:48):
you think I've done nothing wrong and I just people
should people should just help me. And that's it. I
don't know why not doing it? I can't help you
mean to me, you your mind's closed. And one of
the friends I just talked about, but he did his
own thing and it was wonderful and I was so
proud of him, and it's very it was very successful.
(14:10):
I was like, see, there you go. You took control
of it. You stop waiting for other people and you
just did it. But also, I you know, I also
you know it comes to life. Some of us are
super overachievers, go getters.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
That's me.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
I am over achiever. I sell of us aren't. Some
of us are either just talent where we just where
we shine as the talent of whatever that is. Not
everybody's a songwriter, Not everybody's a producer, everybody's a director.
You know, you gotta think about the kind stuff that.
Not everybody is a showrunner, like you went on what
you're doing. Everybody's manager. Some people like just being being told,
(14:50):
go here, do this, do that. They got it, here's
your work for it today. I don't know what I'm
talked about. There who just like they like to know
what they expected of them, and they just form.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
They do it. They hit the markers and they got it.
Not wrong at all.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
There's just room for all of us. But some of
us we're over achievers. We just gotta go out there.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
I do.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
But if I can't go out to do myself, I'll
find somebody. I ask a great folks surrounding me. So
I'm good. But but again, we are human, and I
know that.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
Folks.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
It's easy to fall into that why me or woe
is me? Or why this is always happening to me?
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Mentality.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
We got to try to fight that every chance we get.
It's because it's just life. Life happens. We need to
examine every time something happens. Maybe why it happened, what
part do I play in it? And how can I
make this not happen again? Or try to it not
gonna happen again. You can't predict the future, but you
can take steps to try to. You know, you know,
(15:49):
how's your lesson for today? A lot of help is
on Tuesdays. We try to do We try to these
episodes every Tuesday for you here on jail j Media,
audio and video. A lot of help dot Thomas the website.
I have a life coach. Also, I want to start
I'm working all this year. We want to post all
my curriculum. I teach courses. I have all kinds of
stuff that I do. Comes to media and self and
(16:10):
getting started organization. Whilst professional organizer, I am for higher
virtual or in person both works. I'm in the LA area,
but I have traveled. I also have two books out,
one on productivity and one getting Started. Both their Tuo
Organizer Universe books and they're on you, They're on YouTube,
(16:32):
They're on Amazon, Kindle, airbag. It's just Happen James on
Junior and you'll see all my books. I have more
coming and I'm working on my website, working on I'm
working on kind stuff this year. The last couple of
years I was busy. Take your family, which is very important,
and now I'm getting back to me. Everyone please take
carry yourselves, have a good week. I'll see you next time.
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