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September 26, 2024 • 21 mins
A brief invitation into this question.
An invitation to join Nicole Schiener and I at our upcoming program Caring Without Carrying It All- A unique virtual program for A Special Virtual Group Program For Sensitive Helping Professionals, Caregivers, Creatives and Changemakers.
www.CaringWithoutCarryingItAll.Com
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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:15):
Hello, and welcome to Julie in Conversation. Just taking in
the birds. So glad to be here with you today
for a shorter podcast, but nonetheless I'm here present with you,
and may you receive what it is you need to

(00:36):
receive and what it is you didn't even know that
you needed. Maybe bird song, maybe just a moment to
take a pause and connect to yourself. I know I
always need that, So that's what this is for me
as I get to connect here with you with my
mic console, some audio tracks, some thoughts, questions that I'll

(01:02):
be bringing forward. So thanks for being here with me.
This is Julian Conversation. I am broadcasting from Montreal, Canada,
known as Jojage traditional territories of the gag Nihogehaga Nation,
bringing acknowledgment to those who have been the custodians of

(01:23):
the land and continue to inhabit this place that I
call and know as Montreal. Acknowledging those who have come
before me, those who are part of my own ancestry,
Acknowledging all beings, acknowledging the body that I am in.

(01:49):
What are you acknowledging for yourself? Right now? Who are
you acknowledging what land might you be acknowledging what ancestors
known or unknown might you be curious about that have
enabled you. I've informed at this moment in time for
you been part of that informing. It's a question I'm

(02:10):
living into and being curious about, and just bringing attention
as I invite you to as well, to this moment,
to your body, to your breath. As I did that,
I noticed my shoulders clenched, jaw a little clenched, and
so I'm going to relax my shoulders that they're not
right up at my ears. And what are you noticing?

(02:33):
What are you needing in this moment for yourself? I
imagine you've taken this time out so that you can
be curious. You can tune in for just a short moment.
Sometimes it's all it takes is as Judith Orloff says,
for those who you may read her books or know

(02:53):
her work, all it takes is thirty seconds if you
close your eyes, tune everything out. Elaine Friend of both
Elaine Friend and Judith Orla are former guests on the podcast,
and Elaine Friend, international consultant on high sensitivity, says that

(03:14):
we tune out eighty percent of the distractions, the visual distractions,
the distractions that keep us from being present. So what
happens when we can close our eyes? What's happening to
my voice right now? I think I need to take
a little drink of a beverage. All that I have
next to me is coffee. I want water. So what

(03:36):
are you noticing in this moment? I'm noticing that I'm
racing against my own clock. I did give myself a
few hours this morning off of my work schedule so
that I can take care of some necessary errands and
realize that maybe I have time for a podcast, and
realized as my one o'clock art time today is approaching,

(04:01):
that it's now thirty minutes, now twenty five minutes, and
now I have twenty minutes to get this podcast in.
And so just being with you here in this moment
as I step into some of what I wanted to
talk about, and also just being with you here right
now and allowing whatever's here to unfold with you right

(04:24):
now and inviting whatever resonates to take with you. Perhaps
it's always the perfect and right time to be tuning in,
And so thank you wherever you're tuning in. From at
whatever time, whether it's present day, September twenty fifth, twenty
twenty four, sometime in the future, may you receive what

(04:46):
it is you need to receive? And like I said previously,
what it is you didn't even know you needed needs?

(05:08):
What are those whose needs are you tending to? What
are those of your own? There are many? Right I

(05:34):
find a question even helpful, like what do I need
right now, in this moment, in this interaction, in this day.
How can we give to ourselves even the curiosity and
the grace and the dignity of having needs and needing
them to be met, even being curious about them? How

(06:06):
we can forget to even ask or inquire or to
focus on our own needs? Is it selfish? Is it
that we're too busy, too many things, no time? What
happens when we don't tend to our needs? Do they
get louder? In various ways through our body, through events, circumstances.

(06:38):
I have a course coming up, a program coming up
with Nicole Shiner, also a previous guest on the podcast,
and it's called Caring Without Carrying it All? And we
have a free information session coming up on October twenty ninth.
If you go to caring without carrying it All. You

(07:00):
will find all the information where you can register for
the free free information session and you'll hear from us
what you can expect for the four month program starting
in November and following a monthly schedule all the way

(07:21):
to February twenty twenty five. So please go to caring
k Steven hard for me to pronounce caring without carrying
it All dot com and you will find the registration button.
We have limited seats, but there's room for you, so

(07:43):
check it out. I'm just going to the website right
now to make sure I have my dates right. So
October twenty ninth at eleven am Eastern, eight am Pacific,
it's free to join forty five minutes with Nicole Shiner
and I. Nicole registered psychotherapist also listed on the Highly
Sensitive website. She's an HSP knowledgeable therapist, a registered psychotherapist

(08:14):
in Ontario for over twenty twenty years. And we are
we have come together to create a program for sensitive
helping professionals, caregivers, creatives and change makers. It's all listed
what you will get, what you can expect, and how
we are here to support you in feeling lighter, freer,

(08:36):
more rested, safer, more confident to set boundaries and hold
boundaries more, to develop more trust in yourself as the
expert on you, and that is starting November twelve, Tuesdays
from twelve to one thirty pm Eastern live on Zoom

(09:03):
November twelfth, December seventeenth, twenty twenty four, and then January
twenty first and February eighteenth, twenty twenty five. Please check
that out. You can go to my website, Julie Cans
Marry You dot com, or you can also go to
caring without Carrying it All dot com. You can register
for the free info session and or just to get
on the wait list to hold your spot. It's going

(09:25):
to be great, going to be impactful or therapist and
coach coming together, so looking forward to having you join us.
And Nicole talks a lot about burnout and compassion, compassion
fatigue and one question that I wanted or one way
I described I heard burnout being described, was when our
motivation has expired? When our motivation has expired, and so

(09:52):
how is your motivation feeling these days? If you're familiar
with Simon and cynic he speaks a lot about the why.
We need to find our why. That's one way of
describing motivation. So how is your motivation? What is your
motivation for what matters to you? Has it expired? Is

(10:18):
it needing some more? Whatever analogy you want to use,
some fuel from replenishment, some nourishment. We're going to be
covering all of this in our program, So check that out.
Would love to have you join us. And what do

(10:42):
we mean when we say motivation. There's intrinsic motivation, external motivation.
I'm being informed by my recent commencement of a new
coaching program that I'm pursuing certification as a health and
well being coach with well coaches and learning about the

(11:06):
practice that I've been practicing for over seventeen years, taking
it up a notch different level. Been going into the
psychology of coaching and the science of coaching and loving it.
This word well being and what that means and how

(11:26):
I can support myself others in connecting to the well being,
what it means to have well being in a community
and systems. And We're talking a lot about motivation and
how when we connect to our motivation we can affect

(11:50):
behavior change positively. And so when I bring up the
word motivation. What comes up for you? What's your motivation?
What's your motivation for? What do you need to get

(12:12):
specific about what you're wanting motivation for? Why do you
do what you do? I was inspired by a coaching
session yesterday that I had the privilege of observing and
witnessing as a mentor coach, and the client, who is

(12:35):
a mental health professional, was talking about things we can
all relate to, which is bringing more well being practices
into his life and finding time to move his body
go to the gym and the coach and he said

(12:56):
something to the effect of how I'm being is not
who I want to be. And the coach aptly responded
and said, well who do you want to be? And
it was a powerful, poignant moment for this client and
for me as the observer, because again it gave them

(13:19):
pause in a moment to think, Yeah, who do I
want to be? What is my vision for myself? And
how do we connect to that and cultivate that. It
does require intention, It often requires the support of a

(13:43):
professional or a space where this can be explored safely
in the boundaries of confidentiality. Often, I mean, of course,
one can do it on their own in creative ways.
But sometimes we do need support in coming to this

(14:07):
awareness or in cultivating a picture or a sense or
knowing or feeling of a vision for ourselves and who
we are and who we want to be, not who
we want to be more like, but who do we

(14:27):
want to become more of? That is uniquely to who
we are. And the feedback from the client was that
that question was very instrumental in creating a moment of
awareness and potential change for him, And so I just

(14:49):
wanted to share that question thanking these people anonymously right now?
Who inspired me in this moment to share with you?
Who do you want to be more of? Who are
you becoming? Do you need to take time to feel

(15:14):
into that vision of yourself to create it? How can
you make that happen for yourself, this connection to who
you are becoming more of the best version of yourself.

(15:35):
Maybe it's being able to recollect a time when you
did feel like all was aligned within you. You were
demonstrating and feeling qualities and characteristics of yourself that felt
just right, just like you meeting your growing edges, expressing

(15:59):
your unique qualities and strengths and values, values play a
big role in from my experience of what I learn
in creating a vision for ourselves and who we are
being and becoming and want to become more of. And
as we connect to this vision, to these values, to

(16:22):
who we are and what makes us unique and purposeful,
this becomes a motivator. We can use this as a
motivator for moving towards what we want, for making decisions,
for aligning with what feels right to us. So this

(16:43):
is just a little brief moment of reflection as I
remember and I'm reminded to hold that vision of myself
not compared to anyone else or anybody else's ideals or
authority or which it or shouldn't be according to someone else,
but according to me and according to you for you.

(17:09):
So I just want to leave you with that today.
What might you find, create, come up with, visually connect
to again be reminded of what I love doing and

(17:35):
creating for myself and others. Is the reminder that we
all have what we need internally to find what is
true for us. And I'm the first one to say
that it takes the support of many other people, whether
it's friends or professionals, so that we can increasingly align

(17:57):
with what works best for us, which what's with what
helps us thrives, thrive and flourish, be our best so
that we can contribute it positively to our life and
to those around us. However far wide you are looking

(18:17):
to do that or called to do that, it will ripple.
So thank you for taking the time to listen here
to yourself with these these invitations, these reflections. Actually, as

(18:44):
part of my well Coaches certification, I need some practice,
even though well forget that part, I need some practice
with this methodology. And so if you're listening, and you
happen to hear this around the end of September or
some time in October, and we don't know each other yet,

(19:06):
you're not a friend or a client, but you'd like
to experience some coaching in connecting to your well being
and creating positive change with your well being and some habits,
perhaps you're wanting to bring into your everyday life and
set some goals and visions. Then let me know, because

(19:27):
I'm offering some free sessions for six to eight week
or six to twelve week free session for wellness coaching
for one practice client. So let me know. Maybe it
is you, I would love to connect with you and

(19:52):
practice what I've been loving and learning in this way.
I used to say that goals were for hockey. I
think I heard somebody say that once and it really resonated,
just based on the work that I was doing, you know,
with my intuitive work and healing work and coaching work
and just my philosophy on not that it was so concrete,

(20:14):
but just how living more by intention and feeling into things.
And not to diminish the importance of goals, but I
guess it was just never something that I felt was
top priority when I was working with clients. Though they
would come with goals and we would talk about them,
it was not a way that I would necessarily market
or believe myself to have the most strengths around. And

(20:38):
this new certification program is very goal driven, and it's
really interesting to just jump in and see the benefits
and how it's impacting me and how it can help others. Ultimately,
I want to be able to support people in connecting
to their own sense of resourcefulness, creativity, well being, and

(21:00):
so adding more to my toolkit. So it's fun, meaningful,
and may you benefit from your own sense of self
and connection to who you are. Thank you for tuning
in for this brief moment with me. I'll be back
with more and want to invite you to check out

(21:23):
Caring without Caring at All dot com or just go
to Julianconversation dot com. It's all there. Let me know
what you're gaining from these podcasts, what you're taking with you,
and may you let your intuition lead. I see you
the work that you're doing and what it takes to
be a fully high functioning human being. No small task.

(21:46):
Here to support you and have a great day. Cheers
to you.
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